The recent crime surge in our neighborhoods can be prevented and YOU CAN MAKE ALL THE DIFFERENCE!
As per Maryland’s Department of Juvenile Services (DJS), “Non-violent felony complaints increased 70.5 percent” and auto theft “more than doubled between FY22 and FY23, rising from 545 to 1193.” Meanwhile, DJS reports that violent felonies such as “carjacking increased 85.4 percent and handgun violations rose nearly 220 percent.”*
In 2022, Maryland State Senator Jill Carter pushed for the state to ban incarceration for juveniles for minor offenses and instituted time limits for how long a young person can be on probation. New laws now call for six months of probation for juveniles who commit adult misdemeanors and one-year probation for juveniles who commit adult felonies.
*Source: djs.maryland.gov/Documents/MD-DJS-Juvenile-Crime-Data-Brief_20230912.pdf
While juvenile justice reforms such as preventive and rehabilitative initiatives may sometimes be somewhat effective, we need to consider who ultimately pays the price. Must we, as innocent and upstanding citizens, suffer the consequences and live in a state of fear due to the constant crime we now face? Additionally, if we don’t hold juvenile offenders accountable for the crimes they commit now, can we truly expect them to grow into law-abiding adults who hold themselves accountable?
Ivan Bates, Baltimore City State’s Attorney explained that since his office presently does not have “first dibs” in juvenile cases, the inability to enforce the law is “extremely” concerning to prosecutors. We are all well aware of the recent increases in carjacking, car theft, and arson in our communities and we must take action to change that.
so that when lawmakers go back to session in Annapolis in January, they know that we will not be complacent and that we won’t stand by silently.
jill.carter@senate.state.md.us.
As the sponsor of the Child Interrogation and Juvenile Justice Reform Act, ask her to represent all of us and repeal this law that places the needs of offenders before the needs of upstanding citizens!
On Wednesday, September 20, 2023, at a town hall about public safety, Baltimore County State’s Attorney Scott Shellenberger, said “The email you should send them is ‘juvenile crime is out of control — reverse the Juvenile Justice [Reform] Act.”
Growing up, some of my fondest Succos memories occurred within “Rabbi Taub’s Shul.” Succos, more than any other time of the year, brought forth the unique flavor of the Rebbe, HaRav Amram Taub, ZT”L, and his shul. Within those hallowed walls, you experienced the Rebbe’s powerful Hallel and Nanuim (shaking of the Lulav). His emotions flowed as only someone who experienced his personal tragedies can relay. Despite the hardships of his past, he still greeted everyone with love and happiness, and Succos was a time that his warmth shined forth. His warm “Shalom Aleichim” and massive smile greeted each and every person. Children were welcomed with a cookie or a lollipopalways with a word of encouragement and a soft pat on the cheek. Who can forget his Succah in the trailer, the Tefillas Geshem, leading duchening, his “telegram” during Hakafos, or the Rebbetzin’s “Halopshes.” It was true “V’Samachta B’Chagecha.”
The Rebbe, though, wasn’t on his own island, he had his dedicated team of mispallilim that each added their special flavor. Rabbi Hefter and his XL Simchas Torah flag topped with a dripping candle. Rabbi Freedman and his Shemini Atzeres kiddush. Rabbi Brull trying to sell Chosson Torah for more than $200. Mr. Schmell and his pekaloch. Major Abramowitz running crowd control. The list goes on, however, for us kids, we always looked forward to the cast of characters that wandered through the doors of the shul throughout Yom Tov.
Who can forget Fred who would drive up in his Cadillac and plop himself down right next to the Rebbe handing out “Mashiach for President’’ business cards. There was a man with a shtreimel and cowboy boots, someone else who carried a ten-foot lulav, and yet another who poked your ear with the lulav. On Simchas Torah you had those who would sweat through their tallis and others who were unable to lift themselves from the floor following the kiddush.
Shul on Succos was a place we looked forward to for all the reasons above. But it was only enjoyable because I had my siblings and friends to enjoy it together with. Watching a tzadik like the Rebbe gave us all a feeling of Succos of yesteryear. And observing my father and his chevra properly celebrating and enjoying a Yom Tov was extremely impactful to all of us.
Succos and Simchas Torah in shul is where memories are created. Rightfully, we always treat the shul with a high level of seriousness, but on Succos we transform that seriousness into serious happiness. Bring your kids to shul and let them create their own memories. You never know, it may be the few moments you spend under the tallis with your child that will impact their life forever.
Wishing everyone a Chag Kasher V’Sameach and a Gut Yom Tov!
Aaron Menachem
By: BJLife Newsroom BaltimoreJewishLife.com/Jeff Cohn
As in past years, Agudath Israel of America’s Washington Office has worked closely with agencies of the U.S. Department of Homeland Security to help avoid potential problems for travelers carrying arba minim.
Both the Transportation Security Administration (TSA) and U.S. Customs and Border Protection (CBP) have notified their respective field personnel about the upcoming Sukkos holiday and the increased level of travel by persons of the Jewish faith, many of whom will be carrying arba minim.
The notifications, which have been sent out to federal officials at airports and border crossings, emphasize the religious significance of these items and outline the rules and procedures that would help allay possible security and health issues that are of concern to the federal government. Prior to these agency steps, lack of familiar-
ity regarding Sukkos and the arba minim had led to numerous incidents each year of inadvertent mishandling and mistreatment -- including denial of entry -- of these ritual objects.
The TSA Notice makes clear that the arba minim carried in airports, through security checkpoints or on aircraft, are not on the “prohibited items list” and provides instructions for travelers needing “special accommodations” in regard to checkpoint screening. The CBP Guidance sets forth detailed information regarding the inspection process for personal sets of arba minim brought into the United States from foreign countries at select ports of entry and points out that the agency is “committed to treating all
travelers, including travelers who may be observing Sukkot, with respect and
dignity at all U.S. ports of entry.”
We are gratified by the ongoing sensitivity of these agencies to the religious concerns of our community,” said Rabbi Abba Cohen, Agudath Israel’s Vice President for Government Affairs and Washington Director. “They are taking meaningful and appropriate steps to accommodate our religious needs.”
He also thanked his colleague Rabbi Ariel Sadwin for serving as the main Agudah point of contact with those federal agencies related to the annual guidance.
Agudath Israel of America once again produced a one-page handout that travelers can print out - or save to their phones - to familiarize themselves with the rules before traveling.
By: BJLife Newsroom BaltimoreJewishLife.com/Jeff Cohn
At Rabbi Yissocher Frand’s annual Teshuva drasha, pre-drasha presentations were made by the United Orthodox Jewish Congregations of Baltimore to the Levinson family and to the Boehm family for their annual support of the drasha and of so many community initiatives. As well, a presentation was made to Eli W. Schlossberg who spends the entire year putting his heart and soul in to making the drasha the huge success that it has become.
Additionally, a presentation was made by Rabbi Ariel Sadwin to Maryland Senate President, Bill Ferguson, for his leadership this past session ensuring the continuation of the BOOST scholarship program, a state program that provides several million dollars annually to Jewish Day school families.
Hundreds of women filed into Shomrei Emunah to hear the inspirational words of Rebbetzin Leah Trenk, the wife of venerated מחנך educator, Rabbi Dovid Trenk ZT’L. Rabbi Y. Besser whose very popular biography about Rabbi Trenk “Just Love Them”, is a compilation of stories that demonstrate the powerful influence of love and positivity. With his total acceptance of students whom many yeshivahs rejected, Rabbi Trenk was able to turn the trajectory of these students around. As a partner in his mission, Rebbetzin Trenk, a worldrenown parenting counselor and mentor, shared part of her husband’s narrative and lessons. She turned to the audience for questions where she shared her wisdom on parenting nurturing relationships with even the most difficult people.
One of the funny and entertaining stories that Rebbetzin Trenk shared was her great reluctance to become a Torah mentor. When she was finally
corralled into becoming one, it was one of her most inspiring experiences. Although she and her partner seemed to come from two vastly different worlds they found much commonality as the years passed--- 15 years and counting!
In the words of Mrs. Sherry Berlin one of the attendees “ I loved just listening to Rebbetzin Trenk speak with her calmness of spirit and love of all human beings....Look at the
makeup of the audience: from left to right, young to old, and everything in between. That alone was awe inspiring. It’s called unity and that’s what Hashem wants from us. Across all spectrums, we should be at shalom with each other. Very few speakers can attract people from all parts of the community as I witnessed tonight. No wonder people from every segment of the community showed up.”
Torah Together who had the priv-
ilege of bringing in Rebbetzin Trenk, shares her mission of love by bringing people together through Torah study. One of its offerings is a chavrusah-based program in which a carefully selected personal Torah partner is matched to meet the study needs of another.
For more information on this program and others, please contact Toby Friedman at tpfriedman@gmail. com/443-468-4598.
of Baltimore, shared 10 secrets for success that he learned from Mrs. Reva Gold A’’H, who spent half a century as the legendary and beloved secretary at TA. This article originally appeared on LinkedIn around 7 years ago and reveals the epitome and legacy of the great person the Baltimore community lost. The article coincided with the tribute paid to her at TA’s 99th Anniversary Banquet that year.
She is at her desk bright and early every morning. She waits eagerly for “her boys” to arrive at school, so that she can spring into action, and be the not-so-behind-the-scenes secretary who has helped keep the school together for so many years.
Mrs. Reva Gold is nearing the end of a half century as a secretary at Talmudical Academy of Baltimore, a private Jewish school for boys with over 1,000 students. She has watched thousands of students come and go, and has been lucky enough to play a role in so many of their lives. She has had a career and a life that has brought her more happiness and fulfillment than many of the richest and most famous people in the world. She is beloved by the Academy alumni far and wide, and it is no wonder why.
As I have watched her over the last
few years, I have observed many things that I believe are the secrets to her happiness and her life’s success story. Are you looking to improve your relationships at home or at work? Are you looking to become more successful in your career? Are you striving each day to become a better person? Do you go through your day wanting to feel more fulfilled?
Here are 10 little nuggets from Mrs. Gold that are sure to help us all be better, more successful people.
1. Have Passion – Mrs. Gold has a passion for life, for her job, and for helping those around her. In life and at your job, you will have much greater success if you have –and show – your passion for it. Not only will you grow, but you will inspire those around you as well
2. Love What You Do – It’s almost all she talks about. Mrs. Gold LOVES her job. It’s hard to come to work each day, and even harder to perform well, if you don’t love what you do. Do what you love, and love what you do.
3. Keep it Simple – There is nothing fancy, nothing complicated. Just a simple commitment to getting the job done, one task at a time. Life doesn’t have to be overly complicated. Take
one step at a time, focusing on the task at hand.
4. Give More Than You Take –“How can I help you?” is Mrs. Gold’s Modus Operandi, and her greatest joy is in the act of giving to others. You will have much satisfaction if you see your role as a giver, rather than a taker.
5. Dress For Success – Mrs. Gold comes to work every day dressed as if she is meeting the President, and she wouldn’t have it any other way. Always look neat, put together, and welldressed. Not only will you be taken more seriously by those around you, but you will be more confident in your own abilities as well.
6. The Little Stuff Matters – Noth-
While some places like New York City have banned right on red turns for most intersections, most other jurisdictions have allowed the
practice. Drivers in Montgomery County, Maryland now have more intersections with no turn on red.
The Safe Streets Act of 2023 was enacted by the Montgomery County
Council and prohibits rights on red at certain marked intersections. The legislation also lengthens the walk times at crosswalks as well as adds more seed cameras. Ten years ago in
Longtime Orioles third baseman Brooks Robinson died on Tuesday, September 26 the team announced. The Little Rock, Arkansas native played his entire 23 year career with the Baltimore Orioles and entered the Hall of Fame in 1983. Known as the Human Vacuum Cleaner for his defensive abilities at
third base, Robinson had many career highlights and achievements. He was named to the All Star team 18 times, was 16 Gold Gloves, the American League MVP in 1964 and was an integral part of the 1966 and 1970 World Series championship teams. Robinson totaled 1,357 RBIs, 2,848 base hits and a career batting average
of .267. He entered Cooperstown with an impressive 91% of the vote on the first ballot, was inducted into the Orioles Hall of Fame, had his No. 5 jersey number retired by the team and a statue of him stands outside of Camden Yards. Former Orioles Ben McDonald tweeted about Robinson “It’s a sad day in #Birdland we have
ing pleases Mrs. Gold more than giving Band-Aids or pretzels to a student who needs them, or taking care of any other small detail that may make their day a little better. Paying attention to the small details are often as important – or sometimes even more so – than the bigger things in life.
7. Attitude Counts – You will always find Mrs. Gold upbeat, even when there are things not to be so happy about. Attitude affects your day, your effectiveness, and rubs off on those around you. Keep it positive. A negative attitude usually doesn’t fix the problem anyway.
8. Arrive Early – Mrs. Gold is at her desk by 6:30 AM, ready to take on the day. Getting an early start is an effective way to get things done before the daily distractions kick in.
9. Always With A Smile – You will always catch Mrs. Gold with a smile on her face. G-d gave you a smile for a reason. Use it. Often.
10. Humility Is The Greatest Tool – The most respected and listened to people around, are often the most humble. Although Mrs. Gold has been the glue that has held so many things together for almost 50 years, she never sees herself as having done anything grand or spectacular. As a leader and influencer, humility is your greatest tool for success.
the county, cameras were installed that issued tickets for cars that failed to completely stop before making rights on red.
lost maybe the greatest @Orioles of all time! Nobody was better than Brooks Robinson at 3rd base….as great as he was on the field he was a better person! Brooks always had time for everyone! Our thoughts and with the Robinson family!”
and I deliver classes on the fundamentals of Torah, on the Parsha, on Judaism, on Rambam, and Tanach and Gemara, etc. Sprinkled throughout the week I give various speeches at Rutgers and different shuls around the area, mostly on the Parsha. When I’m not speaking, I’m involved with
the tapestry of Torah. My goal is to engage people, make them stop and think, and ultimately help them develop a deeper understanding of our heritage.
BJH: Your passion is palpable. Now,
grounds develop a deeper understanding of their heritage and spark their enthusiasm for Torah.
BJH: Outside of your Torah-related work, do you have any hobbies or inter-
Definitely. Apart from my direct Torah-related activities, I host a podcast on Spotify called “The Parsha on Fire Podcast.” It’s an extension of my mission to ignite passion for Torah in people. I also enjoy traveling, observing the world, and incorporating those experiences into my teaching. It’s about finding stories and inspiration from diverse sources and weaving them into the tapestry of Torah.
BJH: Your dedication shines through in all aspects of your life. If someone wants to learn more about you, your podcast, or your book, where can they find you online or on social media? Thank you for asking. You can find my podcast, “The Parsha on Fire Podcast,” on Spotify. I also send out a weekly email with the podcast and a PDF version of the content, which you can subscribe to by emailing me at TheParshaOnFire@ gmail.com. Additionally, I’m associated with ShiurEnjoyment.com, a Chicago-based platform, and you can find my book, “The Parsha on Fire,” on Amazon,
BJH: Do you have any parting words of advice or a message you’d like I’d like to leave you with this: In our short time in this world, we have a choice to be passionate, fiery Jews who approach Torah with enthusiasm and depth or to merely float along. Embrace your role as a Jew, never settle for mediocrity, and let the fire of Torah burn brightly within you!
peace between Jews and Muslims, Cohen said.
As a peace deal between Israel and Saudi Arabia becomes more and more possible with each passing day, Foreign Minister Eli Cohen has announced that an additional seven Islamic nations have expressed interest in making peace with Israel — if the Saudi agreement works out.
“There are at least another six or seven countries that I have met with – significant Muslim countries with which we do not have relations – that are interested [in peace],” Cohen said.
“Peace with Saudi Arabia means peace with the greater Muslim world,” the foreign minister asserted. Not only that, but peace between Israel and Saudi Arabia would also bring about
In his address to the UN’s General Assembly, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu shared his hopes for a future “new Middle East” in which Israel and Saudi Arabia would have a diplomatic relationship with one another.
Cohen has not mentioned specific countries by name, although he made it clear that he is not speaking of Libya, a country whose foreign minister was fired from her job and had to escape when her meeting with Cohen was prematurely announced. Since then, Abdulhamid al-Dbeibeh, the Prime Minister of Libya, has remained steadfast in his commitment to not having a relationship with the Jewish state.
The Israeli Foreign Minister added that while he isn’t in direct contact with some of the Islamic countries interested in peace with Israel, he has insisted that “more countries will join… [Israel’s] peace circle.”
the Israeli defense delegation. The two will issue a joint declaration on cooperation between the respective defense establishments.
The sale would also make Germany the second country, after the U.S., to obtain the Arrow from Israel, a decision that a Defense Ministry official called significant.
On Thursday, Israel is set to sign a letter of commitment to sell $3.5 billion worth of the Arrow 3 air defense system to Germany. It is the largest-ever single defense contract.
Defense Minister Yoav Gallant will fly to Berlin for a two-day visit in order to ink the deal for the Defense Ministry, which developed the system in cooperation with the United States. The U.S. gave its blessing to the sale in August. While in Berlin, Gallant will also meet with his German counterpart, Boris Pistorius, who is hosting
Arrow 3 is considered to be one of the most advanced air defense systems of its kind, crafted to intercept ballistic missiles while they pass through space, beyond Earth’s atmosphere. The system is designed to destroy projectiles and their nuclear, biological, chemical or conventional warheads close to their launch sites, from a distance of up to 2,400 kilometers (1,490 miles). It is Israel’s topmost layer of air defense, complementing the shorter-range David Sling and Iron Dome systems.
Selling the system to Germany points to the high degree of trust between Jerusalem and Berlin, and highlights their close defense ties, an Israeli Defense Ministry official said.
Q. How did the Malkas Tehillim program come about?
Mrs. Liora Rosen (Kriah Coordinator, Lower Elementary School
Limudei Kodesh Coordinator
Emerita): The Malkas Tehillim program was a result of dedicated moros looking for ways to motivate their talmidos to practice Kriah (Hebrew reading). The second grade moros chose Sefer Tehillim to achieve their goal. The school printed an in-house user-friendly edition of Sefer Tehillim for our second graders with a large, clear font, and numbered and double spaced lines. In 2013, to our delight, ArtScroll published a beautiful Sefer Tehillim that matches the girls’ Siddurim and is suitable for second graders.
Q. How is the program introduced to the girls?
Mrs. Liora Rosen: Each year, shortly after Sukkos, our second graders receive their own Sefer Tehillim at a special assembly. We share with our students that they were fortunate to receive two treasures in first grade, a Siddur and a Chumash. Now, in Second Grade, they are receiving a third treasure, Sefer Tehillim. The girls are introduced to Sefer Tehillim with a beautiful story “My Special Power” adapted from a story by Yona Weinberg. This begins their journey and relationship with Tehillim.
Q. Please walk us through the program as it progresses through the year.
Mrs. Liora Rosen: As each girl completes reading each perek (chapter), she colors in a square on a special chart that is placed in their Tehillim to mark their progress. When she completes reading a “Yom (Day)” (Sefer Tehillim is divided into seven days), she receives a personalized necklace
and medallion that says ‘I Completed Yom _____ in Sefer Tehillim.’ By the time a girl completes Sefer Tehillim, she is the proud owner of seven beautiful necklaces.
Upon completing Sefer Tehillim (it could be in second, third, or fourth grade) each talmida and her class, parents, and often grandparents, celebrates with a very meaningful siyum celebration. All eyes are on her as she is crowned Malkas Tehillim. She receives her seventh necklace and a certificate. The class sings and dances as the Malkas Tehillim sits beaming in the middle of the circle. She distributes a special treat. Last, a photo is taken of the Malkas Tehillim and posted on the school wall to highlight her accomplishment.
Q. How many girls finish the entire program?
Rabbi Yochanon Stein (Upper Elementary School Principal): I collected some data on this recently. In the second grade, about 30 to 40 girls finish Sefer Tehillim. In the third and fourth grades, it varies between around 36 to around 60. Sometimes a student with special needs will have her Malkas Tehillim in ninth grade.
At each siyum, I share a brief d’var Torah or story about a kapittel (chapter) of Tehillim with the girls, going sequentially in the order of the sefer. This year, im yirtzeh Hashem, we are starting with kapittel 93!
Q. What is the impact of the program on the girls’ lives?
Rabbi Yitzchok Sanders (Lower Elementary School Principal): It does two things at once – instills a love of Yiddishkeit while practicing Kriah. Becoming comfortable with Tehillim is a great way to get closer to Hashem.
Rabbi Yochanon Stein: It makes the girls feel good about themselves, as it is a huge accomplishment!
Tehillim is a value in Bais Yaakov. Even if the girls don’t understand the words at the beginning, they will come to understand them as they get older, and it’s the start, for many, of a beautiful relationship with these words of David Hamelech, through which each girl can connect powerfully to Hashem.
Mrs. Liora Rosen: Sefer Tehilim is used for Kriah practice, but so much more is gained by our talmidos. The girls learn that anytime is a good time to say Tehillim and we can ask Hashem for anything we need or want. In addition, we can thank Hashem for the wonderful things in our lives.
Some girls plan to have their Siyum coincide with a yahrtzeit of a grandparent, which is especially meaningful. A few talmidos completed Sefer Tehillim at the Kosel in Yerushalayim. Some girls have completed Sefer Tehillim multiple times since second grade, where they forged a bond with it.
We’ve heard delightful stories of granddaughters reading with their
grandmothers face-to-face or over the phone many miles apart. One grandmother commented that if her granddaughter can finish Sefer Tehillim, then she could too! The family celebrated the grandmother’s siyum by crowning her Malkas Tehillim and presenting her with a certificate. We’ve also heard stories from grandmothers of twins who made time to read with both granddaughters. One grandmother shared that she always had a Sefer Tehillim with her in the car so if a granddaughter called she would park at the side of the road to hear her read.
Rabbi Yochanon Stein: The Malkas Tehillim program is such a strong vehicle for intergenerational connection, that we often have grandmothers travel in from far away to attend their granddaughter’s siyum, sometimes even flying across the country! To accommodate them, we hold the second grade siyumim in the public rooms of the school instead of upstairs in the classrooms.
Mrs. Liora Rosen: May Hakadosh Boruch Hu accept all the Tefillos coming out of the pure mouths of our talmidos!
As Germany is part of NATO, the sale of Arrow 3 to Germany will be significant for NATO members who are wary of what is going on in Ukraine. The German government has led a push to bolster NATO’s air defenses in Europe after seeing Russia’s relentless missile strikes on Ukraine, urging allies to buy deterrence systems together. More than a dozen European countries have so far signed up to the so-called European Sky Shield initiative.
Berlin expects the Arrow 3 system to be delivered in the final quarter of 2025.
According to reports, Israel and Mexico are working to enable citizens to fly directly between Israel and Mexico. Up until now, Israeli tourists have been forced to first arrive somewhere in the United States or Europe before being able to travel to Mexico, thus making for what could be a seventeen-hour trip.
Miri Regev, Israel’s Transportation Minister, will reportedly go to Mexico City for two days in the coming week in order to discuss plans with Mexican officials. If a deal is met, the option of direct flights between Israel and Mexico would be made available towards the beginning of 2024.
An additional consideration which will likely be touched upon during such a meeting is the topic of driver’s licenses. In specific terms, Regev will, according to reports, try to reach an agreement which would render Mexican driver’s licenses valid in Israel and Israeli driver’s licenses valid in Mexico, without forcing tourists to hold international driver’s licenses.
Mexico is a desirable destination for Israeli tourists, as many enjoy the well-known Mexican city of Cancun. With the upcoming 2026 World Cup, which will be hosted in the U.S., Canada, and Mexico, many Israelis are looking forward to traveling to Mexico in order to watch the soccer games.
The transportation minister will also seek to work out a deal in which Israel and Mexico would share transportation-related data with one another, including information relevant
to each respective country’s railways system.
Regev is also expected to visit the Mexican Jewish community on her trip.
just, comprehensive solution to the Palestinian issue; the solution must be based on resolutions in the international arena and must bring about a peace that allows [the] Palestinian people to have an independent state based on the 1967 borders with East Jerusalem as its capital,” Prince Faisal bin Farhan, the Foreign Minister of Saudi Arabia, has said.
On Monday, Saudi Arabia spoke out against the many Jews who prayed on Temple Mount, the holiest site in Judaism, on the holy day of Yom Kippur, calling such people “extremists.”
Technically, the position of mayor in Texas is nonpartisan. But Johnson served in the Texas House of Representatives as a Democrat before he ran for mayor and was long aligned with the party’s moderate wing. He pushed for major tax cuts in the city’s latest budget, and he has criticized Democrats in recent years for seeking to curtail police funding.
In the coming days, a Saudi delegation will meet with Mahmoud Abbas, the president of the Palestinian Authority (PA), in the West Bank, according to reports.
Nayef al-Sudairi, a Saudi Arabian ambassador to Jordan, as well as Saudi’s first non-resident ambassador to the PA and non-resident consul general to Jerusalem, will serve as the head of the delegation.
“We welcome His Excellency the Ambassador of the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia to the State of Palestine, who will present his official credentials to His Excellency President Mahmoud Abbas within a few days,” Hussein alSheikh, one of the leading members of the Palestinian government, said, adding that the meeting will take place in Ramallah, a city under the control of the Palestinian Authority.
Last Wednesday, Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed Bin Salman said that with each passing day, Saudi Arabia gets closer to making peace with Israel. Israeli PM Benjamin Netanyahu has similarly spoken highly of the future relationship he hopes the Jewish state will have with Riyadh, as well as the rest of the Middle East.
Still, it is unclear if, as part of such a deal, the Kingdom would insist on a solution to the Israel-Palestinian conflict, as it has claimed it would. Currently, the U.S. is working on arranging a peace agreement which would not include the creation of a Palestinian state.
“Security in the Middle East region requires the acceleration of…a
“The Ministry of Foreign Affairs expresses the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia’s condemnation of the repeated provocative practices carried out by a group of extremists at al-Aqsa Mosque under the protection of the Israeli occupation forces,” Riyadh said, with many other Muslim countries releasing similar statements.
With his announcement, Johnson becomes one of the nation’s few bigcity Republican mayors, and the only one to lead one of the 10 largest cities. He will have company nearby: Mattie Parker, the mayor of Fort Worth, is a Republican.
“American cities need Republicans — and Republicans need American cities,” Johnson wrote in an opinion essay in The Wall Street Journal on Friday, announcing his party switch.
“Too often, local tax dollars are spent on policies that exacerbate homelessness, coddle criminals and make it harder for ordinary people to make a living,” he wrote. “And too many local Democrats insist on virtue signaling.”
Many Republicans said Friday that they were willing to welcome the mayor. Matt Rinaldi, chair of the Republican Party of Texas, wrote on X, formerly known as Twitter, that he was “thrilled” at the news of the switch. “We look forward to working with him to make Dallas better,” Rinaldi wrote.
In his essay, Johnson said he would remain in office as mayor through the end of his current term in 2027.
Mayor Eric Johnson of Dallas announced on Friday that he had switched his party affiliation to become a Republican, saying that leaders in the Democratic Party had focused on “virtue signaling” and had not done enough to help residents of the nation’s cities.
The decision was surprising for its timing: Johnson was reelected to a second term last year after running unopposed, and cannot run for a third. But the move appeared in line with how he had increasingly been positioning himself politically: At his second inauguration, Johnson was joined by Texas’ two Republican U.S. senators, Ted Cruz and John Cornyn.
Johnson’s party switch “is an insult to the very voters who have gotten him to this point,” said Kardal Coleman, chair of the Dallas County Democratic Party. “This is really a bait-andswitch.” (© The New York Times)
Former President Trump is set to skip the second Republican debate this week and instead will deliver a primetime speech to an audience of current and former union members, including from the United Auto Workers, whose members are on strike. Not to be outdone, current President Joe Biden is set to join members of UAW on Tuesday who are walking the picket line.
Facing a dismal economic outlook and with polling numbers plunging, Biden is hoping that the UAW strike doesn’t drag out too long. It also helps that Biden is visiting the workers in Michigan, a key battleground state.
Trump has slammed Biden for the visit, claiming that the president “had no intention” of walking the picket line until Trump said he would make a speech in Michigan. Perhaps Trump’s assertions are true, as plans of Biden visiting the workers were finalized, then scrapped, then rearranged.
Amid mounting political pressure to ramp up his public support, Biden is expressing solidarity with the union members, who are striking against the Big Three automakers – General Motors, Ford and Stellantis – for a second week.
“I think the UAW gave up an incredible amount back when the automobile industry was going under,” Biden said Monday during a meeting with his HBCU advisory board when asked whether he supports the UAW’s asks in the negotiations. “They gave
everything, from their pensions on. And they saved the automobile industry. And I think that now that the industry is roaring back, they should participate in the benefit of that.
“If you take a look at the significant increase in salaries for executives, growth in the industry, they should benefit from it. So, yes, I support – I’ve always supported the UAW.”
pected to function independently, has 28 pending cases that were filed by the United Auto Workers.
UAW has yet to offer an endorsement of Biden for 2024. Union members used to be solidly Democrat; now, many of the workers are leaning more Republican.
Many presidents, including Biden himself, previously have declined to wade into union disputes to avoid the perception of taking sides on issues in which the negotiating parties are often engaged in litigation. The National Labor Relations Board, whose members are appointed by the president but ex-
The number of first responders from the New York City Fire Department who have died from 9/11-related illnesses has reached 343. That number is a tragic count in the FDNY, as it’s the number of those in the NYC Fire Department who lost their lives on the day of the September 11, 2001, terrorist attacks.
Two more members of the FDNY died this September from 9/11-related illnesses, shortly after the 22nd anniversary of the World Trade Center attacks, according to a statement on social media from the fire department.
Hilda Vannata, an emergency medical technician for the fire department, died on September 20 from cancer. She had joined the fire department in 1988 and served as an EMT for 26 years. Retired firefighter Robert Fulco died Saturday morning from pulmonary fibrosis.
“We have long known this day was coming, yet its reality is astounding just the same,” said Fire Commissioner Laura Kavanagh in a statement. “343 of our heroes lost in one day, and today, 343 more. The FDNY will never forget them. This is our legacy. This is our promise,” she said.
In addition to the rise in the number of firefighters and first responders
Monday, First Day Chol Hamoed
Kashrus of Birds The Question of Turkey
Tuesday, Second Day Chol Hamoed
Kashrus of Animals The Question of Bison
Wednesday, Third Day Chol Hamoed
Kashrus of Fish The Question of Swordfish
Thursday, Fourth Day Chol Hamoed
Kashrus of Insects The Question of Locusts
Each day’s topic is an independent subject
8:00 Shacharis, followed by Breakfast
10:00 Seder - Mareh Mekomos will be provided. Bring your own chavrusah, or we can provide a chavrusah. There will also be a Hachanah Shiur available.
11:10- 11:40 Shiur by HaRav Mordechai Frankel א“טילש
Fulfill
who died following rescue operations at ground zero, the number of diseases connected to the World Trade Center attacks continues to grow as well.
According to the fire department, 11,000 firefighters suffer from World Trade Center-related diseases, including 3,500 who have cancer. Exposure to the toxic materials in the aftermath of the disaster has been linked to heightened risk of cardiovascular disease, respiratory disease, cancer, and other diseases.
“So many of our members showed up for us that fateful day, and so many were lost. The legacy we create for them is one of honor, and one of promise,” said Kavanagh.
More than a month after catastrophic flames raced across Lahaina, annihilating most of the historic town and killing 97 people in Maui, some residents were finally able to return to the charred remains of their homes this week.
Residents in what has been designated Zone 1C were able to go to their properties in western Lahaina on Monday.
“I think we need this day,” Tawni Smith Katayama said before she and her grandmother went to see what remained of their home. “I think we need just a little bit of, not just closure, but it’s so unreal to see. And you know we’ve driven past it and we’ve seen it on the news, but I think really you need to just see, we need to see it in person. We need to go and stand on our property and see, you know, what’s left and process that.”
“many dangers remain,” as burn sites could still be covered with hazardous materials like ash and other debris, such as asbestos, heavy metals, byproducts of plastic combustion and other chemicals.
Residents should be aware of the health risks of trying to “clean up” their burned properties, as doing so could make the situation worse, county officials said. Improperly handling debris and ash could spread dangerous material if it becomes airborne.
It could take three months before Lahaina is fully cleared for reentry, Governor Josh Green said.
The Maui wildfires damaged or destroyed about 3,000 homes and businesses and caused an estimated $4 billion to $6 billion worth of destruction.
The disaster area has been split into zones, which will be gradually reopened to residents as they are inspected and deemed safe to reenter, Maui officials said.
The state plans to reopen West Maui to visitors on October 8 and is trying to transition more than 7,400 displaced people from hotels to longterm housing, the governor has said.
The Consumer Financial Protection Bureau, a government agency which overlooks banks, credit unions, and the like, is currently considering enacting new rules which would make medical debt have no impact on a person’s credit score. The bureau will likely make a final decision on the matter in 2024, before which they will seek the input of small businesses in order to determine what sort of effects such a rule would have in practice.
A report released from the agency in 2022 revealed that about 20% of U.S. citizens have admitted to having medical debt.
One additional deceased victim –Lahaina resident Matsuyuki Osato, 83 – was also identified by the county Monday.
Maui County has warned that
“Research shows that medical bills have little predictive value in credit decisions, yet tens of millions of American households are dealing with medical debt on their credit reports,” said Rohit Chopra, the director of the CFPB. “When someone gets sick, they should be able to focus on getting better, rather than fighting debt collectors trying to extort them into paying bills
they may not even owe.”
Not only is medical debt a poor method of determining one’s eligibility for a loan, Chopra asserted, but medical bills are also often hard to pay because they are all too often “confusing and error-ridden.”
“These bills, even ones where the patient doesn’t owe anything further, can end up being reported on the patient’s credit report,” Chopra added.
In the event that such a rule is passed, medical debt would have zero effect on one’s credit score, and creditors wouldn’t be able to take into account unpaid medical bills when considering giving a person loans.
In 2022, Equifax, Experian, and TransUnion, the three biggest credit reporting agencies, said that they would eliminate 70% of medical debt from consumer credit reports, and will also not factor in any medical bills that were paid. Furthermore, medical bills won’t affect any of those agencies’ credit reports until the debt has existed for over a year. Additionally, any debt which does not exceed $500 will not affect Equifax, Experian, or
TransUnion credit reports.
Vice President Kamala Harris has spoken in support of the CFPB’s proposal to eliminate medical debt from credit scores.
“We know credit scores determine whether a person can have economic health and well-being, much less the ability to grow their wealth,” Harris said. “Today, we are offering a solution to fix this problem … Together, these measures will improve the credit scores of millions of Americans so that they will better be able to invest in their future.”
On Sunday, after five months on a strike, the major film and television studios and striking writers reached a tentative agreement after days of marathon negotiating sessions, the Writers Guild of America said, paving a path forward to end the historic work stoppage that has frozen production and much of Hollywood.
“What we have won in this con-
tract – most particularly, everything we have gained since May 2nd – is due to the willingness of this membership to exercise its power, to demonstrate its solidarity, to walk side-by-side, to endure the pain and uncertainty of the past 146 days,” the WGA said in an email to members on Sunday. “It is the leverage generated by your strike, in concert with the extraordinary support of our union siblings, that finally brought the companies back to the table to make a deal.”
While the agreement still needs to be ratified by members of WGA, which represents more than 11,000 writers, this marks a significant turning point in the nearly five-month-long strike. The current walkout came close to beating the longest strike in WGA history, a 1988 strike that lasted 154 days.
President Joe Biden hailed the tentative agreement on Monday and called on employers to fairly compensate workers.
Although there’s an agreement in place, the deal does not immediately end the strike.
“To be clear, no one is to return to work until specifically authorized to by the Guild. We are still on strike until then,” the WGA wrote. “But we are, as of today, suspending WGA picketing.” The Guild encouraged members to join the picket line for the actors’ strike instead this week.
The actors’ union, SAG-AFTRA, has also been on strike since mid-July; SAG-AFTRA represents about 160,000 actors.
Both Hollywood strikes have been drawn-out and costly, with the nationwide economic impact of more than $5 billion, according to economists. Industries like restaurants, service firms and prop shops have also felt the ripple effects from the ongoing disputes and
have had to cut staffing as a result. In New York, disruption of 11 major productions resulted in a loss of $1.3 billion and 17,000 jobs, according to Empire State Development.
Bob Menendez, a 69-year-old Democrat who has been serving as the U.S. senator of New Jersey since 2006, has been charged in New York, alongside his wife Nadline, on three counts: on conspiracy to commit bribery, conspiracy to commit honest services fraud, and conspiracy to commit extortion under color of official right. Three others, who are allegedly connected to the crimes Menendez has been accused of, have been charged with bribery and honest services fraud.
The indictment alleges that Menendez used his political power in order to benefit three businessmen, as well as the government of Egypt, in exchange for about half a million dollars in cash, 81.5 ounces of gold bars (valued at approx. $155,000), and a Mercedes-Benz, among other things which were acquired from 2018 (or
of the indicted businessmen whom Menendez allegedly used his political power to help. Daibes, at the time, was indicted on banking crimes, charges which he later pleaded guilty to. The other two defendants are Wael Hana and Jose Uribe.
The indictment alleges that Hana was the link between Menendez and the Egyptian officials who bribed the senator.
In accordance to Democratic Caucus rules, Menendez has temporarily stepped down from his position as chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee, as those charged with felonies are barred from holding such positions until the charges are dropped. Menendez, who is running for reelection in 2024, has denied all these accusations and has pledged to continue doing his job as senator. In 2017, he was indicted on similar bribery charges for allegedly receiving expensive presents from Salomon Melgen, a Florida ophthalmologist who was convicted of Medicare fraud, after Menendez convinced former President Donald Trump to lessen Melgen’s sentence. The 2017 charges were dropped after the jury failed to agree on a verdict.
Last week, a rare $10,000 bill dating back to the Great Depression sold for a whopping $480,000 at auction.
The note was issued in 1934 and features the face of President Lincoln’s Secretary of the Treasury, Salmon P. Chase. The price set the record for the most a bill of that value ever sold.
“Large denomination notes always have drawn the interest of collectors of all levels,” said Dustin Johnston, vice president of currency at Heritage Auctions, in a press release. “The $10,000 trails only the $100,000 gold certificate issued in 1934, and of the 18 examples graded by PMG, this example is tied for the highest-graded.”
igation, a Copenhagen court ruled on Monday that the artist must return nearly all of the cash.
The most a 1934 $10,000 bill had sold for previously was $384,000 in September 2020.
The $10,000 bill was the highest denomination note to ever circulate publicly — with the $100,000 bill only used to transfer funds between Federal Reserve banks. This particular note that was auctioned was never in circulation, according to Heritage Auctions.
Due to lack of use, currency notes in denominations of $500 or higher were discontinued in 1969. Now, the highest denomination note issued by the U.S. is the $100 bill.
Talk about big bucks.
Speaking of money, what happens when someone just takes the money and runs? That’s what happened when a Danish museum gave artist Jens Haaning 530,000 Danish krone ($76,000) to create works of art for the museum. But Haaning took the money and gave the institution blank canvases.
Now, after almost two years of lit-
Haaning had previously created two other works of art for the museum: frames filled with banknotes depicting the average annual salaries of an Austrian and a Dane for an exhibition on the future of labor. In 2021, the Kunsten Museum of Modern Art gave him money to create updated versions of those pieces. But Haaning had an expensive trick up his sleeve: he sent the museum two empty frames entitled “Take the Money and Run,” saying he had created new, “better” pieces to fit the exhibition’s theme.
According to Haaning, the piece was a commentary on low wages and that his breach of contract was part of the work.
He told CNN at the time: “I saw, from my artistic point of view, that I could create a much better piece for them than what they could imagine.” He added: “I don’t see that I have stolen money… I have created an art piece, which is maybe 10 or 100 times better than what we had planned. What is the problem?”
Haaning said the new artwork invited people to reflect on social structures and institutions like religion and marriage. “And if needed… take the money and run,” he added.
Kunsten Museum of Modern Art exhibited Haaning’s empty canvases alongside a print-out of an email in which he explained his actions.
Haaning is not the only artist to call laziness a work of art. Maurizio Cattelan is famous for taping a banana to a wall and calling it art. Banksy has shredded his paintings at auction. In 1958, conceptual artist Yves Klein exhibited an empty room to thousands of people.
Still, the court was not pleased with Haaning’s creativity, ruling that he was “obliged” to return the loaned money, minus 40,000 krone ($5,730) in artist and display fees.
Sounds like he drew a blank with this piece.
“It’s lots of fun collecting, and I’m always looking for new toothpastes that come out. There are different trends, like right now there are lots of toothpastes they’re making with charcoal,” Kolpakov said.
A million dollar smile.
The caretakers of a historic Michigan lighthouse are offering free stays at the landmark in an unusual contest involving messages in bottles tossed into the Great Lakes.
The White Shoal Light Historical Preservation Society announced the “message in a bottle contest” as part of the lighthouse’s 113th anniversary celebrations.
The offshore lighthouse is the tallest lighthouse on the Great Lakes.
A dentist from Georgia has now earned the Guinness World Record for the largest toothpaste collection.
Dr. Val Kolpakov is the proud owner of 2,037 different toothpaste tubes. These are not your average Crest or Colgate versions. Some of his toothpastes are wasabi- or whiskey-flavored and hail from Japan, Korea, India and Russia.
“I started my collection in 2001 to learn more as a dentist about all available toothpastes on the market,” Kolpakov told Guinness World Records. “Soon I realized that this is a very interesting hobby and tried to collect some old toothpastes and tubes from other countries.”
Kolpakov said some of the most unusual tubes displayed at his dental practice’s “mini museum” include a trio of whiskey-flavored tubes in rye, scotch and bourbon varieties. He said the novelty toothpastes, manufactured by Don Poynter in the 1950s, contain 3% alcohol.
Kolpakov said he also has a wasabi-flavored toothpaste, but he has no plans to try it.
“As you can imagine, it might not be for weak people,” he said.
Other unusual entries in his collection include a tube of Doramad toothpaste containing the radioactive compound thorium and a tube of Brenner’s toothpaste made specifically as a prop for a TV series.
Each of the four messages in bottles, which were dropped into Lake Michigan on September 4, contains a message from one of four descendants of longtime lightkeeper George Keller. The messages feature various offers for a free three-night stay for one, two, or up to five people.
The message in a bottle contest pays tribute to the Armistice Day Blizzard of November 1940, in which Keller and a colleague threw a message in a bottle into the water in case they did not survive the storm. The men survived the storm, and their message was found a few weeks later by fisherman near Gros Cap, Michigan.
The lighthouse is booked for the rest of the year, but three nights in the twin room is worth $1,500 and three nights in one queen room is worth $3,000.
We’re “shore” you’re going to love staying here!
By Rabbi Moshe Dear Executive Director, Baltimore Bikur Cholim
Ah! The bliss and majesty we all experience when we step inside our sukkah creates within us a feeling of contentment, Dveykus, and holiness, which is somewhat difficult to describe. We welcome the Ushpizin, the seven heavenly visitors into our sukkah. Undoubtedly, their presence contributes to this aura. Each one of the Ushpizin brings his own unique Middah attributed to a different heavenly trait creating layers to the overall splendor.
The idea of special visitors inspired me to reflect on the amazing job that our own Baltimore Bikur Cholim patient visitation volunteers do on a day in and day out basis. In fact, over the course of a year, our volunteers visit over 10,000 patients in hospitals, rehabilitation facilities, and those recuperating at home.
It is important for us to remember that even for those of us not yet Bikur Cholim volunteers, that the mitzvah to visit and care for the sick is incumbent upon us all. In fact, even though there may be a myriad of actions one can do for cholim, the overarching name given to this mitzvah is “Bikur Cholim”, literally visiting the sick.
It therefore behooves us to remind ourselves of some basic rules of thumb when we encounter the opportunity to visit a choleh.
Firstly, despite our eagerness to fulfill the mitzvah, we must remember that we are there for the choleh, and not the other way around. The sick person should not become our “Cheftzah Shel Mitzvah”. The specific needs, emotions, and condition of the choleh becomes the compass with which to guide the actions and response of the visitor. This includes first determining
whether or not the choleh desires visitors, and at what time is most convenient and helpful. You do not want to be a nuisance to the sick person. If you are visiting in a hospital or another facility, first determine if visits are permitted and to honor the visiting hours.
Secondly, be sure to listen with compassion, empathy, and sensitivity. Make no judgmental comments. Be sure your responses and actions are uplifting and fill the sick person with hope and inspiration. It often can be important for a visitor to listen also to what is NOT articulated and to read between the lines to determine what can be most helpful. Ask for specific ways you can be of most assistance. Do they need meals, laundry, shopping, home chores, financial assistance, child-care, carpool, reading material etc.
We certainly are familiar with the
need for good hygiene and hand washing so make sure you wash hands and use hand sanitizer before your visit. If you yourself are under the weather, consider making a phone or zoom visit until you are well.
Remember that the choleh may need rest or be in a state of discomfort so keep your visits as short as possible without overstaying your welcome and helpfulness. Take your cues from the patient and stay only as long as appreciated. Davening for the choleh and giving a bracha for “refuah shelaima” are integral with the mitzvah of visiting the sick, as well.
When we visit the sick we are performing a mitzvah modeled for us by Hashem Himself! Should you be interested in becoming a Bikur Cholim volunteer please contact us at 410-9993700, or baltimorebikurcholim.org.
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Let me introduce four clients and their Jerusalem real estate goals:
Ariel, an Israeli living abroad for the next 8 years, wants to move into a modern 3-bedroom apartment upon his return to Israel. Batsheva lives in Israel and her goal is to move into a 4-bedroom apartment in 15 years. Chava lives overseas and would love to move into a 3-bedroom apartment when she retires and makes aliyah in ten years. Finally, David wants to buy an investment with strong upside potential but limited downside risk.
The clients’ commonalities were (1) a long-term horizon of at least 8 years and (2) a desire to buy in central Jerusalem, but (3) an inability to afford apartments based on today’s market values. Despite the budgetary limitations, our clients’ timing flexibility empowered us to think creatively, and we focused on Pinuy Binuy urban renewal projects.
Pinuy Binuy means to evacuate ( pinuy) and tear down older buildings and construct (binuy) new ones. When the older, smaller buildings are replaced with higher density housing, the original owners trade in their apartments for a new, often significantly larger, apartment – plus the developer covers their relocation costs during construction. Accordingly, astute buyers are purchasing
apartments in buildings slated for Pinuy Binuy redevelopment, with the long-term goal of exchanging them for brand-new apartments at no additional cost.
Keep in mind a few important points: Just because a building is dilapidated and should be torn down does not mean that it will. As not all older buildings will end up being razed and rebuilt, one must do thorough research to ensure that they are choosing their purchase wisely. Furthermore, Pinuy Binuy is a drawn-out
ters because it is a “win-win-win” situation1) :) the existing apartment owners receive new units; (2) the local government provides a solution to the pent-up demand for additional housing while also replacing older, unsafe buildings; and (3) the developers profit by selling apartments.
Our four clients embraced Pinuy Binuy, as it afforded them the opportunity to buy an existing unit which down the road will be replaced with a new apart-
that location is worth over 4.5m NIS. As you can see, the upside is massive, which is why Ariel urged me to write this article – he named it “The Gold Rush of 2023” –so that others can take advantage of this opportunity.
Batsheva bought an 87 sqm 3-bedroom unit in the same complex, and will receive a 124 sqm 4-bedroom apartment upon project completion. Chava, like Ariel, bought a 65 sqm unit and will receive a 103 sqm 3-bedroom unit. Finally, David the investor bought a 65 sqm 2-bedroom unit in Armon Hanatziv, a neighborhood next to Arnona that is about to undergo major gentrification thanks to Pinuy Binuy. David paid 1.8m NIS and in 8 to 10 years will receive a 100 sqm unit, which is worth 3.5m NIS in today’s market.
process. Between getting existing apartment owners to approve the project, enduring a lengthy administrative process, emptying out the buildings, and then finally constructing new towers, a project can sometimes take upwards of ten years to complete.
Pinuy Binuy has become extremely popular in Israel’s major population cen-
ment that addresses their needs. Ariel bought a 65 sqm apartment in a great Katamon location, where a Pinuy Binuy plan has been in the works for the past few years. The apartment, purchased for 2.5m NIS, will be replaced with a 103 sqm 3-bedroom apartment upon project completion in about eight years. In today’s market, the value of a 103 sqm unit in
Pinuy Binuy is understandably not for everyone. However, for investors and families with a long-term real estate horizon, buying an apartment with Pinuy Binuy potential can be a golden opportunity.
Gedaliah Borvick is the founder of My Israel Home (www.myisraelhome.com), a real estate agency focused on helping people from abroad buy and sell homes in Israel. To sign up for his monthly market updates, contact him at gborvick@gmail.com.
Just because a building is dilapidated and should be torn down does not mean that it will.
Simchas Torah, with its singing, dancing and abundance of sugar, is easily a childhood favorite. Riding on shoulders, being thrown in the air, and an extra dose of chaos round out the fun. I’ve seen otherwise quiet men get onto chairs and sing, inspired by the festivities.
Beyond the merriment is a meaningful celebration of Torah accomplishment. Torah is meant to be learned with joy and love, both of which are reflected in the way we mark this occasion. Rather than being a somber event, it sounds like a stampede as the men pound their feet into the shaking floors.
Even those that are normally shy will step beyond their comfort zone, and it’s inspirational to see how lovingly and joyously the bachurim clutch the sifrei Torah. Simchas Torah brings out a unique aspect in all of us, and kids are no exception. Waving their flags and swinging their treats, they want to be a part of every moment. This yom tov is a meaningful way to give over the beauty of the Torah and the joy in our heritage.
Tinokes Shel Beis Rabban
Children and teens of all ages should value their learning and Torah growth. My son was so excited when he found out that learning alef beis was beginning real Torah study because the Torah is written in those osiyos.
Many people don’t appreciate the important foundational skills that go into serious Torah learning. Yes, we know to respect Gemara learning and the unique challenge it provides. But we also need to value the building blocks that led to that moment. Children learn to say “Torah tziva lanu Moshe ” and the Shema. They progress to reading and Lech Lecha. Rashi is written in a different script – they had different fonts back then, too
– and that must also be mastered. Especially for predominantly English speakers, beginning to learn another language is no easy feat. Each of these milestones should be celebrated and recognized as Torah accomplishments.
Whether it’s a learning disability or some other reason, many children are not on the same schedule as their peers. These students may be “behind” children of the same age, and they often have to work that much harder to reach each step. Rather than feel inferior, they should be recognized for their serious efforts and major accomplishments. Torah, unlike other studies, is based on the efforts and not only the results.
Kids and teens don’t need to feel removed from the festivities or as if they’re celebrating someone else’s simcha. They should be encouraged to find their own accomplishments meaningful and worth celebrating. When the kehilla dances, we are dancing for our children, too, and they should have that awareness.
The dancing can get lively and wild – adults jumping like kids, many inebriated. Some children can’t imagine Simchas Torah without the noise, chaos, and everyone bumping into each other. For those kids, please bring them to the liveliest hakafos you can find.
For a variety of reasons, many children and teens don’t tolerate noise or crowds. Some individuals have sensory issues and can’t handle the overload. Other children are shy in crowds or uncomfortable being bumped and jostled. We may think every child will enjoy the liveliest of hakafos and busiest of celebrations, but there are many children that will be overwhelmed or panic. Bringing these children into a rowdy hakafos can be a disaster. There
are many shuls and batei medrash with more open space and calmer dancing that could be a better fit for your child.
Safety is important on yom tov, too. Know where your child is, who they’re with and what they’re doing at all times. You don’t need to stand over them or “chip” them, but basic awareness is crucial. Our children are too valuable to ever be hefker, and our supervision is no less needed as the party happens.
You’ll have a tough time convincing children there is no mitzvah to eat candy on Simchas Torah, and most parents allow the children to (over)indulge on this special day. Other than kiddush, there is certainly no requirement to drink alcohol, beer or hard drinks. Do not offer these to other people’s teens (or children) and watch your own carefully. Even without driving, drinking can be dangerous, and Hatzalah has far too many stories. Ensure that whoever is watching your child will remain sober.
Smoking is a dangerous, addictive habit. Please don’t give out cigarettes (or worse) to minors, even if you think it’ll make things more “leibedi’k”. The true simcha of Torah isn’t from these substances. Not everyone will reach the madreiga where Torah alone gives them that thrill, but, even then, we don’t need to artificially enhance it for them.
Many places restrict what food may be brought. It’s prudent to find out the rules in advance so everything you send
with your child will be appropriate. Many shuls restrict certain foods that children can be dangerously allergic to. The rav knows his mispallelim well, and if there are children (or adults) that are at-risk from an otherwise benign treat. No matter how careful your child is, please don’t send those snacks. Many parents of allergic children count on these locations as being safe for their child.
On Simchas Torah, children eat their snacks as they constantly move. It’s worthwhile to be extra careful to not give choking hazards to young children or those with an increased risk of choking.
Some kehillos specify which hechsherim they permit. Even if another hechsher is well respected, it’s still inappropriate to bring it there. We are an amazing and mutually respectful community. This is just one more way we can continue that wonderful trend.
As the children prepare their flags and the teens discuss their dancing schedules, there’s excitement in the air. Simchas Torah is truly a special way to complete the intense period of yomim noraim. I wish all of our readers a joyous yom tov and a year of learning Torah in joy. Chag sameach!
Sara Rayvych, MSEd, has her master’s in general and special education. She has been homeschooling for over 10 years in Far Rockaway. She can be contacted at Rayvych Homeschool@gmail.com.
The Mishnayos and Gemara talk about the types of sukkahs we don’t have. Our rabbis discuss sukkahs aboveground, of unusual shapes, and most notably where the walls and angles seem to defy the concepts of engineering. My sukkah is simple and straightforward, with four solid walls where the schach meets these walls, requiring less creativity. My guess is that yours is, too. However, the Gemara introduces ideas that are part of the Halachah L’Moshe M’Sinai – which means these unusual building concepts for sukkah are part of the Torah’s definition of a sukkah, which allows for not only incredible flexibility but a deeper message about the holiday as well.
Among the unusual building considerations, a fairly well-known one is the concept of “lavud.” When we think of a wall, we envision a solid surface that is not penetrable. However, in halachic definitions, you can consider a surface a halachic wall even with empty spaces, as long as these spaces don’t exceed three tephachim (about a foot of empty space). There is also the concept of “gud asik .” The walls are supposed to reach the schach, but if they don’t, yet they’re under the schach, there’s a concept of considering these empty spaces as if they were filled. And, there is another concept of “dofen akuma”: If you have schach adjacent to the wall that is not kosher – schach pasul – we are allowed to imagine the wall is bent and becoming part of the schach itself, overlooking a potential disqualification and considering it kosher.
We see that the halachos pertaining to sukkos allow for flexibility and imagination. However, with that in mind, think now about Pesach, exactly six months from Sukkos day. Can you look at chametz and matzah with the same flexibility? Absolutely not. Pesach is “seder,” it has to be
done in an ordered way. But this begs the question of why is there a fundamental difference between the way we observe Pesach and Sukkos.
Let us go back a step to the underpinnings of the holiday – Pesach is a time to celebrate G-d’s revelation. It was a mo -
raculous sukkos we lived in while in the Midbar. Rabbi Eliezer disagrees, saying instead that our sukkahs are supposed to remind us of the divine Clouds of Glory that led us in the desert.
However, both of these answers have a common thread: emunah. Both were
see. There is a force beyond us connecting the dots. Some of us have expectations in life that Hashem will always provide for us the way we expect, like having four solid walls. The wall reaches the floor and connects to the ceiling, which is solid. If our expectation in life is that everything is symmetrical and perfect, it’s an obstruction to developing a sense of emunah and will ultimately lead us to disappointment when things don’t turn out exactly how we envision the ideal.
Pesach is the holiday of seder and exactitude. Pesach offers clarity in all aspects of yom tov – how to prepare, when to prepare, everything from dos and don’ts, when to sit, when to stand, when to sing – there is a seder, where there is absolute revelation.
But not moments of faith. Moments of faith have empty spaces – holes, gaps, things are bent. Sukkos halacha says that if an area is transparent and you can stick your hand through it, there’s air, but if you can view it, it’s connected, and it’s considered one. This attitude is the foundation of emunah.
It would seem to me that we have never needed to integrate this idea, this message, more deeply and meaningfully than we do now.
ment of tremendous clarity, and there was no question G-d existed and had dominion over nature. G-d was involved in every step of our national destiny.
The underpinning of Sukkos is a bit more up for debate. There’s a machlokes between Rabbi Eliezer and Rabbi Akiva, where Rabbi Akiva says the sukkah’s purpose is to remind us of the actual mi-
miraculous revelations of Hashem’s protection and guidance when we were vulnerable. Therefore, it could be that the construction of the sukkah has so much halachic flexibility because the essence of the entire yom tov of Sukkos is about emunah, faith.
At its essence, emunah helps us recognize that reality exists beyond what we
The yom tov of Sukkos is inspiring in that it helps us not concentrate on all that is missing – the bent walls, those things that are not just right. It teaches us to have simple faith that there is a full picture beyond what we see and allows us to use this concept to experience true joy: Z’man Simchaseinu.
Both were miraculous revelations of Hashem’s protection and guidance when we were vulnerable.
Ahavas Yisrael Charity Fund thanks our wonderful Rabbonim and our very generous supporters, as thousands contributed to our Aseres Yemei Teshuva campaign.
Your donation made sure no one in our community went to bed hungry.
On behalf of Rabbi Boruch Brull, his hard working staff, and the 130+ volunteers of Ahavas Yisrael, we thank you. Your donation made a real difference.
One community, one act, endless impact.
ANNOUNCING THE LAUNCH OF THE AMUD HAYOMI PROGRAM
THE AMUD HAYOMI JOURNEY BEGINS
AND HAVE YOUR NAME INSCRIBED IN THE SEFER GIBBORIM!
The ‘Sefer Gibborim’ — to be placed at the kever of the Chasam Sofer — contains the names of all Amud HaYomi participants, including anyone who accepts upon himself to learn the daily Amud.
L: HaRav Binyomin Finkel at the Chofetz Chaim’s Kever at a previous Dirshu mission to Radin in 2015
R: Sefer Gibborim at the Chofetz Chaim’s Kever
Amud HaYomi will begin its 1st cycle through Shas with Masechta Brachos on Monday, October 16th / 1 Cheshvan . This historic initiative will enable deeper comprehension utilizing Dirshu’s proven retention and accountability methods through bechinos and stipends.
• Program launches with Brachos 2a
• Limud of Daily Amud / 7 Amudim weekly
• Completion of Shas within 15 years
• Optional monthly bechinos with stipends
• Daily live shiurim and chaburos worldwide
• Convenient pocket luach
• Shiurim available at AmudHaYomi.com and on the AllDaf mobile app
• 4 unique levels
• Supplemental resource material
FOR MORE INFORMATION OR TO JOIN AMUD HAYOMI: 732-987-3948 ext. 105 | info@DirshuNJ.org | AmudHaYomi.com
TO START A SHIUR OR CHABURAH IN YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD: Contact Rabbi Eli Rudnicki at 732-987-3948 ext. 106 | er@DirshuNJ.org
WITH MASECHES BRACHOS ON
I would like to join Amud HaYomi* and have my name inscribed in the Sefer Gibborim, which will be placed at the kever of the Chasam Sofer, and for the Gedolim to daven there on my behalf.
HEBREW NAME
MOTHER’S HEBREW NAME
FULL NAME
ADDRESS
* A kabbalah, the sefarim teach us, strengthens one’s resolve. It is understood that the kabbalah is bli neder and that circumstances can crop up that will make it difficult to keep. There is no minimum time requirement.
Please fill in the pertinent information, take a picture and email Dirshu@DirshuGlobal.org, no later than Tuesday, Oct. 10 or visit: AmudHaYomi.com/Sefer
For a Jew the journey from awe to joy is a short trip. We just cried our hearts out, appealing for a favorable judgment, and in just five days we will be dancing with joy.
Are we so confident to think we effected a full repentance that we deserve to celebrate?
Is it merely our confidence in G-d’s verdict, that no matter the outcome, we accept our fate with joy?
There is a perplexing Midrash that reports how Iyov complained about his suffering and was only consoled, when he was shown by G-d, a Sukkah consisting of two [perpendicular] halachic walls and the third consisting of only a tefach, [spaced slightly within three tefachim, of one of those walls].
What secret to overcoming pain is encrypted within the image of this Sukkah?
There was a family that had the custom during the meal to break the fast after the inspired but long and
arduous day of Yom Kippur, to go around the table and ask each member to share their highlight during the prayers of that day. Each child would point out their ‘moment’. For some it was Kol Nidrei, others during ‘Vidui’, perhaps U’Nesaneh Tokef, and for many it was Neilah.
One daughter though never contributed to the conversation in all her years at home.
When she graduated High School, she approached her father telling him she had something very personal to share.
Tears were already streaming down her face as she confessed to her father that she was embarrassed by what she was about to reveal.
“Do you know why on all those Motzei Yom Kippurs I never shared my ‘special moment’? Because it was extremely difficult for me to fast, as you know. I always feel terrible, with a pounding headache. The most cherished moment for me — spiritually that is — is when I take that first cold drink after Havdalah and taste some
delicious cake. I feel relieved and liberated and am grateful to Hashem Who bestows His abundance of good, and only commanded us to fast one day a year, and even forgives pathetic little me who rejoices when the fast is over.
“During these instances I feel an overwhelming closeness to Hashem, Who alleviates after difficulty, and does not demand from me more than I can handle. It is as if a gate opens for me after it has closed for everyone else!”
Her father calmed his bawling daughter, warmly validating her feelings. He affirmed how every good moment is special, and her ability to frame it and sense closeness to Hashem is so special and admirable.
He explained to her how everyone has their limitations, and how truly remarkable it was that she took a moment to lighten the load to a spiritual place. He added how fortunate and remarkable it is that there is a young Jewish woman who can open doors in heaven even while for all others they are closed! ןיזגמ -ג"פשת ךליו עידומה( )טארק
The Holy Arizal taught that the minimum size Sukkah — two walls at a right angle, with a small wall of a tefach jutting at a right angle forming the beginning of third wall — is reminiscent of an arm extended with the intention to embrace another within it. This he says is the fulfillment of the sentiment expressed in Shir Hashirim, ינקבחת ונימיו — and his right hand would embrace me.
Iyov struggled and was frustrated. But when this image/message was revealed to him, he fathomed that amidst the difficulties we must learn to hurdle over and appreciate, there are precious moments of revelation of G-d’s kindness and love that are to be treasured and cherished.
Even as we cry from the lack of clarity in appreciating our challenges fully, we can still open a door to Hashem’s love and warmth.
So, even though we may have not quite reached the levels of repentance we yearn to achieve, we can still relish and joyously celebrate those moments of being in the warm and understanding embrace of Hashem!
You may reach the author at: Ravzt@ohelmoshebaltimore.com
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Agudah of Greenspring - 6107 Greenspring Ave
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Kehillas Meor HaTorah - 6539 Pebble Brooke Rd
Khal Ahavas Yisroel/ Tzemach Tzedek - 6811 Park Heights Ave
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Mesivta Kesser Torah - 8400 Park Heights Ave
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Ner Israel Rabbinical College - 400 Mt Wilson Ln
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Ohel Moshe - 2808 Smith Ave
Ohel Yakov - 3200 Glen Ave
Ohr Hamizrach [Sefaradi] - 6813 Park Heights Ave
Ohr Yisroel - 2429 Lightfoot Dr
Pikesville Jewish Congregation - 7644 Carla Rd
Shearith Israel Congregation - 5835 Park Heights Ave
Shomrei Emunah Congregation - 6221 Greenspring Ave
Shomrei Mishmeres Hakodesh - 2821 W Strathmore Ave
Suburban Orthodox Congregation Toras Chaim - 7504 Seven Mile Ln
Talmudical Academy - 4445 Old Court Rd
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The Shul at the Lubavitch Center - 6701 Old Pimlico Rd
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Tzeirei Anash - 6706 Cross County Blvd
Wealcatch Insurance - 37 Walker Ave 2nd floor
Yeshiva Tiferes Hatorah - 6819 Williamson Ave
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1/2lb
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Nonverbal Learning Disability (NVLD) refers to an individual who suffers from learning disabilities due to their difficulties in interpreting nonverbal information. The term “nonverbal” is therefore misleading, as it can be interpreted as meaning that one is lacking in verbal abilities. NLVD is, in fact, just the opposite, as we shall explain.
Communication between people is a mixture of verbal and nonverbal information. Some studies have shown that as much as 93% of communication is nonverbal. Individuals with NLVD have difficulties in comprehending nonverbal forms of communication. This can lead to many
areas of difficulty, even though that their ability to understand verbal communication is completely intact. This might not be readily apparent in little children, but as children emerge into adolescence and adulthood, so much of our expression become nonverbal.
This is a typical presentation of a child with NLVD: His or her vocabulary is very well developed at a relatively young age, and they become so adept at verbal expression that they seem to be talking almost like an adult. Their extra focus on verbal learning and expression allows then to hone their skills of memorization of verbal information and will therefore perform very well academically for those subjects that require retaining a
lot of pieces of raw information. However, subjects that require abstract reasoning can be very difficult. This includes math, especially math word problems. Additionally, even with reading, their comprehension tends to focus on the basic information and not on the overall meaning. For example, if they would read a book about the American Civil War, they would be able to recall an impressive amount of detailed information about all of the different battles, but not the overall background of what they were really fighting for. In a sense, when it comes to reading, they often miss the forest for the trees.
overlooked. Their verbal abilities are well developed, and they try very hard to hide their difficulties. They can get through the lower grades of school without attracting much attention. They will receive excellent grades in some subjects and below-average grades in others, and deficiencies in social competence are not as noticeable at that age. As they progress closer to adolescence, all of this starts to change. The learning in school starts to require nonverbal comprehension, and social interactions become extremely important.
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In their interactions with other people, they tend to focus on the literal verbal communication, and miss the true meaning of the communication. They also miss out on the body language, tone of voice, and facial expressions. If a classmate says in a teasing voice, “This teacher is soooo exciting,” they might think that their friend actually believes that the teacher is stimulating and engaging. Additionally, since the only mode of communication that they connect with is verbal, they tend to talk a lot since they have no other way to easily communicate.
They also have difficulty processing visual-spatial information and they suffer from motor deficiencies. This can lead to handwriting problems, physical awkwardness, and difficulties with tasks that require motor coordination, such as tying shoes.
Due to the difficulties they have in processing nonverbal information, adjusting to changes can be extremely difficult and they often will try to avoid new situations. Individuals with NLVD have a healthy sense of empathy and they crave friendships just like everybody else. Unfortunately, they may have fewer friends due to their difficulties in nonverbal communication. They are therefore at a heightened risk of anxiety and depression.
Children will NLVD are often
The challenge that these children face is that most other learning disabilities, such as dyslexia or ADHD, will manifest themselves as early as preschool. However, with NLVD, they seem like little professors in first grade, which makes it very difficult for the adults to switch gears and realize that in fact this child has a learning disability that requires intervention just as much as any other learning disability. Additionally, not only is their academic life impacted, but their social life is also at risk.
We are blessed to live in a time when effective interventions exist that can help children with all types of learning disabilities, including NLVD. The biggest obstacle to intervention is a misdiagnosis. There is overlap with ADHD and autism spectrum disorder, and treatment for a disorder that the child does not have is not helpful. Someone who is well trained and experienced in psychological testing can help identify the exact learning disability and then establish an appropriate roadmap for future intervention. As with everything else, the best intervention is early detection.
This is a service of Relief Resources. Relief is an organization that provides mental health referrals, education, and support to the frum community. Rabbi Yisrael Slansky is director of the Baltimore branch of Relief. He can be contacted at 410-448-8356 or at yslansky@ reliefhelp.org
Ihad a major revelation during a nightmare car rental experience. After many years with a smartphone, I finally made the switch and have been using a flip phone that has no email for many months. The switch was life-altering and difficult, but my life has changed for the better in so many ways that it was worth the trouble.
Over the past bunch of months, I have seen so many Hashgacha Pratis (Divine Providence) stories with my phone, how everything worked out in such smooth ways even when it shouldn’t have. So many times, I have felt the Divine pat on the back, showing me that the effort was worth it to make that switch.
tion I needed off my email, and I was finally able to complete the car rental process.
As I was standing there, out of breath, I frustratingly wondered where my Divine pat on the back was, miraculously easing my experience, even though I lacked a smartphone. Then I realized something monumental. Yes, my choice to live without a smartphone made certain things more difficult and complicated at times, but the benefits of my switch far outweighed the trouble. If I thought realistically, I acknowledged that having less access to technology was more challenging, it was still worth the trouble.
tem used by Android smartphones. However, the majority of these MP3 players lack proper security measures, allowing them to access the internet when connected to a WiFi network. One such player, known as the Timkoo, has been gaining traction within our communities and has even
necessary steps to access the unfiltered internet on this device are readily available.
Much like smartphones, even a player marketed as “Kosher” can potentially access the internet and play videos. If your child lacks the technical know-how to figure it out, they might have friends who can. For an up-to-date list of TAG Approved Kosher MP3 players or players that the TAG office can modify to remove the radio feature, please visit our website - tagbaltimore.org
To share a tech triumph or story of chizuk, please email Techtriumphs@
This year the demands for help are even greater and we simply cannot do it without your support. WE NEED YOUR HELP!
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his interview took place at Camp Simcha, one of the most enchanting places on Earth.
Camp Simcha is the cherished haven of Chai Lifeline, dedicated to children bravely fighting against cancer and other persistent illnesses. We spoke to four remarkable young girls, each engaged in a unique battle who shared their inspiring stories.
TIn our interconnected world, the power of the media cannot be overestimated. Internet websites, social media, radio, newspapers, and magazines increasingly control the fate of politicians and governments, world finances and morality. In the chareidi world, the messages conveyed by religious media can shape and strengthen emuna, enrich charitable efforts, and ferment new shul and yeshiva policies. Therefore, it was a great privilege to interview the highly influential Rabbi Eli Paley, owner of Mishpacha Media Group and publisher of the Mishpacha Hebrew and English weekly magazines.
Eli Paley is a businessman and social activist. He is chairman of the Paley Family Foundation which supports and promotes Torah Centers and social initiatives in the Charedi community. A member of the Jewish Funders Network, he is active in several philanthropic organizations.
Efrat Kamenetsky is from Cedarhurst. She is 17 years old and was born with spina bifida, an open back and spine. Since the age of one, she has been in a wheelchair. She realized as she got older that she was different. Being in a wheelchair takes more time and effort but she is thankful for who she is today.
We discussed the Mishpacha’s origin, the challenges he is faced with policy decision making, and the overall goals he hopes to attain through the publication.
did things become more manageable. Unfortunately, her sister was also diagnosed with Cancer. This was extremely hard for the entire family and they went into survival mode. She became both the sick child and the sibling and saw from both sides how the whole family was affected. When her sister went through Cancer, she was able to tell her sister what to expect which was nice for her sister.
very fine line, still needing to be treated like you have a disability but not treated as a sick girl. They all would like to be treated as normal people and with sensitivity.
Eli was born in in the Mattesdorff neighborhood in Yerushalayim. His great-grandfather and grandfather arrived in Eretz Yisroel in 1925 to establish the Slabodka Yeshivah in Chevron. Later his grandfather became the assistant to Rabbi Herzel, the chief rabbi of Israel.
Eli himself is an alumni of Chevron yeshiva. When he married his wife, a graduate of Michlala in Bayit Vegan, his dream was to continue learning. However, a few months after his marriage, his brother mentioned a new monthly publication called Mishpacha was looking for someone to work as a distributor in Yerushalayim for a day and a half once every 5 to 6 weeks. With flex hours like that, Eli took the job, earning twice as much as he would be for an entire month in a kolel. Financially independent, he continued to learn diligently.
Nava Stern is 13 years old and from Cleveland, Ohio. She was born with a defect in her immune system with hardly any antibodies. She takes prophylactic meds every day and sees a neurologist every three months. At age 9 she started infusion treatment which she has every week. She sees that Hashem is always looking out for her and makes everything happen for an exact reason.
His father, Rabbi Yehuda Paley, bought the Mishpacha Magazine business. To help his father, Eli got involved in the editorial angle of the magazine figuring out how it could make a unique contribution to the field of journalism. He left learning to pursue his new mission to inspire and influence the Chareidi community. It is that idealism that still drives him in his work so many years later.
Lily Weinraub is 15 years old and from the DC area. She began having epileptic seizures when she was 11. She is now on medication and is BH in good health. She is now used to living with epilepsy and has accepted that what will come will come and she will meet it when it does.
While Mishpacha is well-received around the world, the goal of Mishpacha is to serve, elevate and be the voice of the Chareidim, particularly in Eretz Yisroel. The real customers are not the advertisers but the audience. Mishpacha seeks to portray an independent voice which is unaffiliated with any political party. In the early years, in the chareidi world of pollicization, this was perceived as a weakness. However, the years have passed, and this freedom has become one of the most salient factors of its success.
Mishpacha was the first Charedi publication to give the same respect to the Sephardi and Ashkenazi societies, attempting to create a sense of unity. Over time, this adherence to equality and ahavas Yisrael became the secret to the business’ success.
Esther Ayushay is 19 years old and from Boston. She was diagnosed with Cancer when she was 10 years old. Being very young she was not aware of the extent of her illness. It was hard trying to understand what was going on when one week she would be in school and the next week not. Only after her doctors explained everything that was going to happen, and she knew what to expect,
Mishpacha’s quest in elevating frum society is done through sincere, honest writing. Mishpacha does not engage in pretending that society is perfect. While recognizing the great achievements and accomplishments in the frum world, Mishpacha will tackle even unpleasant issues, albeit in an extremely sensitive way.
The girls were asked what they would like the world to know about them. Lily said she experienced a lot of love from her classmates when she told them about her epilepsy. Nava felt people need to be mindful of what they say and do because often they don’t understand how it hurts on the inside. Esther said everybody needs to be mindful that people have things going on in their lives and sometimes when people would say things without thinking it would affect her.
In terms of how they would like to be treated Efrat described a
The topic of poverty among Charedim and the poor economic situation in the Israeli community lay heavily on Eli’s heart. As part of the solution, Eli started the Charedi Institute of Public Affairs to engage with the government with hopes to resolve this in a way that will allow the Charedi society to retain its Torah values.
While American Jews may have difficulty in relating to the issues overseas, Eli, as a born and bred Israeli is certainly in touch with the masses. He recalls the issue he faced during his kolel years when distributing the magazine. The government regulation forbid a yingeman from receiving Kollel benefits if he had any other source of income. Therefore, he was forced to register his side job under his wife’s name, a desperate solution used by many. In his publication, he attempts to broker a better solution.
How do the girls cope with bad days? Part of Esther’s treatment was having a bone marrow transplant and she now wears hearing aids. It took her until high school when she started wearing hearing aids to realize she had to do what was right for herself. Nava’s bad days are when she has to go for treatment. She finds that talking to her friends from Camp and Chai Lifeline and listening to upbeat music helps her a lot. In the last year Efrat has struggled with depression and anxiety and school is very hard for her. She said, “Do it in your own time, you don’t have to be perfect and eventually it gets better”.
Another example of difficulties that Israeli chareidim face is the draft. Mishpacha discussed population statistics -- one out of four children is Charedi– and how the army and Charedi society can possibly reach a solution.
The paper is faced daily with Hashkafa decisions that have far-reaching effects on our society. The issue of printing pictures of women in the magazine has been debated back and forth in many forums. When Hilary Clinton was running for President, Mishpacha shocked many readers by publishing a blurry photo of Donald Trump and Hilary on the cover. “We just wanted to see how people would react,” Eli confides.
The office did receive some complaints, but the Gedolim the magazine consults advised them to include her since there was a real possibility Hilary would indeed become president. However, in Israel, an anti-Mishacha publication blasted Mishpacha , claiming they were breaking the rules of modesty and Torah by publishing a picture of Hilary Clinton.
This became a real issue because it was very hard for Eli to justify in his mind why they could not print modest pictures of women, particularly considering how hard it seems to be to explain to ba’alei teshuvah why women are “ignored.” In order to make Mishpacha, often one of their first exposures to Yiddishkeit, more palatable, Eli is comfortable with his decision.
What inspires these girls and what gives them chizuk? Lily often gets inspired by small lines or poetry. Esther’s sister and her parents are huge inspirations and it is inspiring to see amazing people and what they are going through. Nava thinks about people going through worse situations than hers, and she then knows that she can deal with her situation. Efrat is inspired by Chelsea Hill, someone she follows on Instagram, who was hit by a drunk and has shown her that you can marry an able-bodied person and have a normal baby.
He’s on a big mission: to expose our brothers to true Torah values, and he bears the responsibility seriously. He often employs a different way of thinking, a creative model, a stretch and a twist, that can support our lifestyle while at the same time show that we care about the Israeli economy, security, and its welfare system. “Instead of just complaining about why we are not understood,” Eli explained during the interview, “we must ask what we can do in this field. While we have to make sure that our kids are not too exposed to the big world, the (outside) world exists, and we have to face reality and come up with practical solutions. “
Rather than hiding his head in the sand, he is ready to take on the problems in our neighbourhoods and cities, working with the authorities instead of against them. Slowly, he believes, we will be able to build better trust.
The girls were asked what the world should know about Camp Simcha. Esther said the name “Simcha” describes exactly how the place is. The air is different because people are breathing Simcha. Everybody is there for each other and every camper feels like this is their world. When you are in Camp Simcha you forget about all the hard things in your life. Nava said, “I don’t know what I’d do without this place. I don’t want to leave.” Camp friends stay connected the entire year and every time she says Camp Simcha it brings a smile to her face. Esther says that whatever she fills herself up with in the short amount of time at camp carries her through to every single day of the year. Efrat described it as “amazing” and “incredible”. She has been at Camp Simcha for 13 years and has made lifelong friendships. Lily said before she had epilepsy she never wanted to go to a sleepaway camp. It was hard to see herself as the sick kid in her family. She came to Camp Simcha and was not judged because of her condition, “It is amazing to see yourself as a normal kid with many opportunities”
Eli is proud that Mishpacha does not try to be sensationalist. Rather he makes an effort to keep his editorial policies responsible and sensitive. “If you’re going to do it le’shaim shamayim” Eli ended, “you’ll have disyata d’shmaya to do it right.”
Esther feels that Hashem chose her. It is hard but Hashem loves her. She lives a different life with deeper meaning. Lily said if one day is not so good there will be good days to come. Nava looks at the good in every situation because Hashem wants to challenge you and show you how strong you are.
“This is your life and you are in charge of it so do what you have to to get through it.”
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Awoman approached me after a recent parenting lecture. “I own three houses, but I don’t have any place that I can really call home. Everyone in my family is unhappy, and it’s miserable for us to spend time together.” Without joy, even the most beautiful surroundings can feel dark and uninviting. How can we help build an atmosphere of happiness in our homes?
Looking at everyone else’s photos and social media posts can make some people feel as if all other families, except their own, are experiencing bliss. It’s as if you are going through your daily grind while others are dancing through life. Scenes of smiling kids, loving couples, and exotic vacations … Don’t fall into this “happiness trap.” No photo ever gives you the
on a smile for the camera. Every family struggles with moods, dynamics, and challenges. True happiness takes work. There is never a home where it is “all fun, all the time.”
Working on creating an atmosphere of joy means that you value your family’s privacy. You do not gripe about your spouse or kids to others, nor do you disparage them. You strive to protect your relationships so that a feeling of trust grows between family members. When there is trust in a home, confidence, hope, and stability flourish. There is a reason that we wish a newlywed couple the beautiful bracha of building a bayis ne’eman b’Yisrael, a home based on ne’emanus, trust and faithfulness, is a home that stands.
As a sense of security is cultivated, parents and children feel happy that they can depend on one another. Instead of comparing your life with others or spending time discussing grievances with friends, make a decision to put energy into nourishing your family unit. Resolve to build rapport between parents and kids as well as siblings.
Strive to see your spouse and children through an ayin tovah, in a positive light, with a good eye, by focusing on their good character traits.
If you have spent your time seeing the negative, this will take a lot of effort, but understand that everyone has good that lies within and learning to see it takes constant practice.
Good communication is not only about talking, it’s also about listening.
Knowing that we are being heard and understood makes us feel happy.
Are you a good listener?
Here are some tips to reflect upon:
• At times, simply listening is an adequate response to show that you care.
• Be careful not to interrupt.
• Don’t always try to offer solutions to fix the situation.
• Give undivided attention and don’t check texts and emails while listening.
• Listen without being judgmental or saying things like, “You did what?!” “How could you?” or “What were you thinking?”
Parents set the tone in the home. Children who observe their mother and father treating each other respectfully know that their home is a safe haven. Of course, there are times that parents disagree, are stressed, or are under pressure. But realizing that even while strained, dignity is being maintained, helps create a sense of peace. Children in such a home know that once they walk through that door, they leave the chaos and craziness of the world behind.
When children grow up in a hostile environment, the foundation of the home is shaken. Some children feel re -
sponsible and try to pitifully fix their parents’ conflict. Others grow fearful of what may come, and, with time, their pain turns into anger. The joy of family life becomes threatened.
When you disagree or are shouldering a burden, be mindful of your tone and words. Our children learn from us. If it becomes acceptable for parents to put one another down, yell, or be sarcastic, the kids will certainly follow our lead. What a powerful lesson it is for our children to observe that even when parents are stressed, they do not resort to hurting others. We do not stoop to meanness. Instead, we contemplate our words and make a choice to control our temper.
The success of our children’s future relationships may depend on the attitude and behavior that they observe at home. We need to model and live the behavior that we hope to instill in our children.
Decide to work on eliminating patterns of disrespect in your home. This includes yelling, put-downs, rolling eyes, sarcastic remarks, laughing at mistakes, and personal attacks. Clearly, physical aggression is never acceptable. Respect translates into an atmosphere where we value the people in our lives and treat each other with honor.
In today’s fast-paced, busy, digital,
online world, families have stopped spending time together. Happy families don’t communicate while looking down. Look around. Whether in a restaurant, on a sidewalk pushing a baby stroller, or in your home, most parents are looking at their devices. Our children are growing up thinking that this is the normal way to communicate. You can speak to someone while looking at your phone. You can have a conversation while texting. Dinner time is food with phones on the table.
Watch teens get together. They sit on the couch, phones in hand. Besides the occasional comment about what they are seeing, no one’s talking. Kids are missing the opportunity to converse, make eye contact, and connect face-to-face.
This type of social interaction leads to a new type of loneliness. We are “alone but together.” We can be texting, in touch with a circle of friends, even sitting beside one another, but we are lonely. Human contact and feeling the physical and emotional presence of others in your life is a sacred gift that can never be replaced by screen time or emojis.
How unimportant do you feel when the person right across from you would rather look at his screen than at you?
It is time for us to say, “Enough.” Let’s put down our phones, stop interrupting family time as we take photos and share, and really be in the moment.
know that family comes first. It is the time together, laughter, family trips, adventures, singing in the rain, and experiences in which we participate that
a child, her husband was never shown any physical affection. His mother never once said, “I love you,” though she is a lovely woman when you meet her. She simply did not know how to express her love. This husband carries the hurt and unhappiness of his childhood, but he won’t admit it. As a result, she and their children suffer.
Children who grow up in a home where spouses put each other first, give kindly without resentment, and speak lovingly enjoy being home.
Whether it is having dinner or breakfast, eat together.
Studies show that families that share meals together are stronger and more connected. Our Shabbos and Yom Tov tables, too, become a crucial time for family bonding.
Smart parents know that to keep the connection alive we must be present in our children’s lives. They create sacred times and spaces so that their children
strengthen our family. There is no substitute for our presence.
Love provides children with a sense of belonging. Homes filled with words of affection, smiles, hugs, and kisses show children that we are happy to be a part of this family.
I met a woman who told me that as
Sons and daughters who feel cherished know that they are valued. Love translates into living a committed life and knowing which priorities are most important. Family and marriage must come first. While words are crucial, it is not enough; show that you love and always be generous with your heart.
There are no perfect families that are happy all the time, but we can try to infuse our homes with joy so that we create light, maintain a sense of security, and build a foundation of love.
Children who grow up in a home where spouses put each other first, give kindly without resentment, and speak lovingly enjoy being home.
In 2000, Dr. Alan Hirsch, MD, a researcher at the Smell and Taste Treatment and Research Foundation in Chicago, conducted a study of snack foods in which he matched popular snacks with different personalities. See if you can match the food with the character traits.
SNACK
(1) Potato chips
(2) Tortilla chips
(3) Snack crackers
(4) Pretzels
(5) Cheese curls
(6) Meat snacks
CHARACTER TRAIT
A. Perfectionists in regards to their own actions and to the community at large; humanitarians who are often distressed by the inequities and injustices of society.
B. Lively and energetic; seek novelty and thrive in the world of abstract concepts; they often lose interest in mundane, day-to-day routines
C. Gregarious, social and often the life of the party; they are loyal and true friends who can always be trusted.
D. Successful, high achievers who enjoy the rewards and trimmings of their success—both in business and in family life.
E. Formal, conscientious and always proper; they will always maintain moral high ground with their family, work and spouses.
F. Contemplative and thoughtful; base their decisions on logic rather than emotions.
Answers: : 1-D; 2-A; 3-F; 4- B; 5- E; 6-C
1. What goes up and down stairs without moving?
2. The more there is, the less you see. What is it?
3. What kind of rooms have no windows or doors?
4. What has to be broken before it can be used?
5. David’s father has three sons: Snap, Crackle and _____ ?
Answers: 1. Carpet; 2.Darkness; 3. Mushroom; 4. Egg; 5. David
1. When someone smiles but their eyes don’t crinkle, it indicates that the person is:
a. Tired
b. Hiding something
c. Faking
d. Excited
2. Raised eyebrows are a sign of:
a. Discomfort
b. Genuine concern
c. Thinking about something else
d. Happiness
3. It is generally accepted that there are 6 universal facial expressions. Which one of the following is not one of them?
a. Happiness
b. Sadness
c. Nervousness
d. Fear
e. Disgust
f. Surprise
g. Anger
4. When someone shakes your
hand with their palm down, what does that likely indicate?
a. They are dominating.
b. They are seeking to convey trust.
c. They are relaxed.
d. They are enthusiastic.
5. Making eye contact for too long may be a sign of lying:
a. True
b. False
6. If a person is rubbing their chin, this would typically mean:
a. They like what you have to say.
b. They are thinking.
c. They are signaling they are in control.
d. They are ready to leave.
7. What is the average blinking rate of a person who is in a relaxed state?
a. 2-4 blinks per minute
b. 6-8 blinks per minute
c. 14-18 blinks per minute
d. 24-27 blinks per minute
Answers:
1-C
2-A
3-C
4-A
5-A- Studies show that when people lie they may seek to overcompensate by making excessive eye contact rather than the more natural tendency for someone who is lying to avert eye contact.
6-B
7-B
Wisdom key:
6-7 Correct: You can work for the FBI. (Good job with the Hunter investigation!)
3-5 Correct: My lips are turned downwards (like a wide “n”) and my head is swaying back and forth like a row boat in choppy water… “Not bad.”
0-2 correct: You are brilliant…. Wink! Wink!
*Dear Centerfold Readers, This trivia is based on various common beliefs about body language, but it is based on generalizations and not conclusive. All I need is for you to throw a kugel in your brother’s face when you misinterpret his body language.
Moishe decides one day to face his issues and finally goes to therapy. The therapist turns to him and says, “So, what can I help you with?”
Moishe replies, “Well, I have a hard time making friends. You think you can help me out, you lazy piece of garbage?”
Puppet traitor Yoon Suk Yeol, even at the 78th U.N. General Assembly, malignantly slandered the relations between [North Korea] and Russia. It’s self-evident that such a guy with a trashlike brain cannot understand the profound and enormous meaning of the development of [North Korea]-Russia friendly relations. No one in the world would lend an ear to the hysteric fit of puppet traitor Yoon Suk Yeol.
- North Korea’s official News Agency criticizing South Korean President Yoon Suk Yeol for warning the U.N. General Assembly about North Korea’s deepening military ties with Russia
Representing the groundbreaking legacy of hip hop in America, LL J Cool J. By the way, that boy’s got – that man’s got biceps bigger than my thighs.
– Pres. Joe Biden during Black Caucus Foundation’s annual Legislative Conference at which rapper LL Cool J was honored
My question is, are they doing it not because they think she’s incompetent, but because they know her potential and they’re afraid of her?
You know, with the way Biden butchered LL Cool J’s name, I wonder if Cornpop’s name was actually Steve.
– Greg Gutfeld, Fox News
He doesn’t know who LL Cool J is. He probably thinks that he’s a brand of air conditioners.
– Comedian Jim Floratine on “Gutfeld”
For 30 years, I have withdrawn thousands of dollars in cash from my personal savings account, which I have kept for emergencies, and because of the history of my family facing confiscation in Cuba. This may seem oldfashioned, but these were monies drawn from my personal savings account based on the income that I have lawfully derived over those 30 years. I look forward to addressing other issues at trial.
- Sen. Bob Menendez (D-NJ) addressing his recent federal indictment and trying to explain why he had $480,000 in cash in his house
Hydroxychloroquine may also be used to treat coronavirus (COVID-19) in certain hospitalized patients.
- From the Mayo Clinic’s website acknowledging now that hydroxy may be an effective Covid treatment, despite the fact that during Covid anyone who promoted hydroxy was considered to be a conspiracy theorist
Mayo Clinic quietly updates website to say Hydroxychloroquine can be used to treat Covid patients. Doctors were fired and censored for saying this. Media smeared it. All because Big Pharma couldn’t have any therapeutic drugs available in order to make billions from vaccine
– Tweet by Rogan O’HandleyAt the White House, I had a million tablets of hydroxy that could have saved thousands of lives but @cnn crusaded against it to beat @ realDonaldTrump. Negligent homicide at a minimum. @fda was also implicated in hydroxy suppression.
– Tweet by Trump’s White House advisor Peter Navarro
The money wasn’t ever the issue since our financial security has never been threatened, but I was so distracted I wasn’t able to be present with the ones I love and caused a lot of harm. This lack of presence has been so hurtful. “You’re here but you’re not with us” is something I’ve been told often throughout my addiction. It affected those I care about in ways I wasn’t aware or could fully understand.
- Professional golfer Phil Mickelson writing on social media about his recovery from a gambling addiction that cost him an estimated $100 million, to date
This football season and beyond, enjoy yourself with moderation so it doesn’t detract from your ability to be present. In my experience, the moments with the ones you love will be far more remembered than any bet you win or fantasy league triumph.
- Ibid.
Basically, every fan thinks of themselves as the owner/general manager.
- Knicks and Rangers owner James Dolan explaining to The New York Times why he doesn’t really enjoy being a sports team owner
Being a professional sports owner in New York, you’re not beloved until you’re dead.
- Ibid.
Probably Haunted.
- A sign posted outside of a funeral home for sale in Massachusetts
Have you had personal contact with anyone at FBI headquarters about the Hunter Biden investigation?
- Rep. Mike Johnson (R-LA) questioning Attorney General Merrick Garland over his alleged involvement in the investigation into Hunter Biden during a House Judiciary Committee hearing
Uh, I don’t recollect the answer to that question.
- Garland’s response…under oath
You don’t recollect whether you talked to anyone at FBI headquarters about an investigation into the President’s son?!
- Rep. Johnson in response
We will block this attempt on the life of Israel’s democracy, and we will win. It might take time, ups and downs, some people might lose their lives along the way. I told the people we will have to face toil, sweat, and tears, hopefully no blood, but there might be some violence.
- Former Israeli prime minister and leader of the anti-judicial overhaul movement Ehud Barak, in an interview with CBS
The extreme leftists of the “protest” (funded by billions and foreign countries) flew to the UN rally to demonstrate. Not in front of the Palestinian Chief Abu Mazen, who in his speech justified the Nazis’ actions, and not in front of the president of Iran, who calls for our destruction.
- Yair Netanyahu, in a Facebook post
[California Gov. Gavin] Newsom, a guy who hates fossil fuels but could still bring down the price of gas by wringing out his hair, once proclaimed that his state would be a sanctuary to all who seek it. Then people actually came, tons of them moving faster than a mob of Walgreens shoplifters. So last week, Newsom said he hopes the conservative Supreme Court will overturn the current law that bans his state from removing out-of-control homeless encampments. Imagine that. Well, what did you expect, Gavin? That the sanctuary seekers were going to show up in Winnebagos? Once again, another example of a high-profile lib using his big mouth to write a check …[he] can’t cash.
- Greg Gutfeld, Fox News
They have canceled the elections. What kind of democracy has no election? So next year, Zelensky said he is not going to have an election because it would be inconvenient and expensive during the war. Well, the thing is, if you don’t have elections, why will the world be supporting a country that is not a democracy?
- Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY), explaining on Fox News why he won’t approve any short-term spending bill that includes funding for Ukraine
They have banned political parties, they’ve invaded churches, they’ve arrested priests, so no, it isn’t a democracy, it’s a corrupt regime. Are the Russians better? No, the Russians are worse. At the same time, we don’t always have to pick some side to be on.
- Ibid.
Over the last three months, we’ve accumulated almost a trillion dollars in three months, the total is $33 trillion. So we don’t have an extra rainy day fund we can send them, we have to borrow money from China to send to the Ukraine.
– Ibid.
Oh, I certainly agree…. I really guess that five years from now, we’re going to find out that between the Clintons and a number of American private equity firms and other hyper-global corporations that, you’re going to find a lot of people have gotten rich from [funding Ukraine].
- Sen. J.D. Vance (R-OH)
Hi. I am 23 years old and date in the “yeshiva” world. There is one guy who a few people suggested to me. Another person told me about him over Rosh Hashana. In general, he checks all the boxes that I want. He is learning now, for a few years, and is then going into his father’s business. I am told he has a good personality and is a nice guy. We are on the same level frumkeit-wise. He is friends with some of my friends’ husbands. There is one thing that is holding me back from dating him. He was engaged before – around a year ago – and then the engagement was broken off six weeks before the wedding. I am told that it was “her side’s fault.”
I am very unsure about going out with someone with a broken engagement. First of all, how do I know that it isn’t his problem that the engagement was broken? Second of all, I am concerned that if things progress with us, I will be insecure about the relationship since I know he came to that point with someone else and said all those things to her and wanted to marry her as well.
I am really not comfortable with dating someone like that but so many people have suggested the shidduch that I am really torn. Do you have any ideas for me?
Disclaimer: This column is not intended to diagnose or otherwise conclude resolutions to any questions. Our intention is not to offer any definitive conclusions to any particular question, rather offer areas of exploration for the author and reader. Due to the nature of the column receiving only a short snapshot of an issue, without the benefit of an actual discussion, the panel’s role is to offer a range of possibilities. We hope to open up meaningful dialogue and individual exploration.
Broken engagements are not considered impediments these days. What with the short dating span, especially in the yeshiva world, it makes sense. However, it’s your feelings that count, and you are nervous. I would suggest dating this fellow but opening up about your concerns early on in the relationship. Talk things out if this begins to get serious. Get some professional help, perhaps. There may be some other concerns you may have, and of course, you may both need more time. Don’t rush things and keep listening to your heart and head.
Shadchan Michelle Mond
Thank you for writing into our panel.
I understand your concern, but you must understand that broken engagements are extremely common these days. There are many reasons for engagements to be broken when it is not either side’s “fault”; rather, it was just a matter of the two getting engaged at a time when the two were not ready.
Go into this shidduch with an open mind just as you would any other shidduch. If it truly makes sense, go for it!
I would just like to point out that based on your letter, something tells me you’re an overthinker. Be aware of this
while you are dating and make sure you don’t make assumptions or jump the gun to give a “no” based on things that may not have a basis. You must give a person a chance to show you who they really are without assumptions or impulses getting in the way.
Have an amazing Sukkos and hatzlacha with the shidduch!
Idoubt if anyone in our Orthodox world keeps statistics about how many engagements end in a breakup, but, empirically, it seems to be happening more frequently lately.
The same uncertainty seems to be true in the secular world. In an article about Who Keeps the Engagement Ring, the University of Virginia Law school reported, “No one knows for sure how many engagements end in a breakup, although there are estimates that roughly 1 in 5 do so.”
Why do post-engagement, pre-wedding breakups occur in our community?
Only you know what you can handle, what you want to handle, and what you want to deal with.
Some folks suggest that couples do not spend enough time dating and getting to really know each other. Some suggest that young people mistakenly give more weight to the opinions of their shadchanim, teachers, and parents, rather than to their own good judgement and instincts. Some breakups seem to occur when both sets of parents cannot agree on matters like wedding arrangements or financial agreements.
In any event, given our
current system of dating through shadchanim and third-party recommendations, do not say “No” to this date simply because the guy experienced a broken engagement.
We are taught to be dan l’kaf z’chus, to judge someone favorably, to give someone the benefit of the doubt. Perhaps the breakup was simply that the couple had felt attracted to each other but had never seriously discussed important issues, like
Thank you for writing into the panel. I appreciate the situation in which you find yourself. And, as I say in all of these columns, ultimately, you will have to trust your gut instinct on this. I read the responses of the panelists, and I believe there is a lot of merit to the opinion that engagements are broken all the time and that if this is a fine young man, he should not be passed up because he potentially had the seichel to break off an engagement that would have culminated in an unsatisfying marriage. However, I do need to bring to your attention a “condition” I recently learned about called retroactive jealousy.
Retroactive jealousy refers to the distress of perceived threat a person feels about their partner’s past romantic relationships. This can occur even if their partner is no longer in contact with their exes and the ex-partners have moved on and they are not interfering with the current relationship. It is a preoccupation of sorts. While some jealousy or preoccupation is normal and can even enhance a relationship, intense retroactive jealousy
can lead to marital discord down the line because a partner is held accountable and something that is not his fault. no mistake: the fact that this man had a woman in his life before you were there is not his fault.
retroactive jealousy has nothing to do with the partner’s current behaviors; it is more often about an insecurity that makes them feel not good enough. shows that an intense case of retroactive jealousy may have an OCD component.
I am in no way suggesting you are struggling with retroactive jealousy. derstand that you are not in a relationship with this guy....yet, you’re worried some thing along these lines may happen. mately, you are the only one who can make this decision.
are definitely common, as are earlier on break ups and divorces, and the fact that some people you date may have had feel ings for another woman before you came along is completely healthy and for some,
Jennifer Mann, LCSW is a licensed psychotherapist and certified trauma healing life coach, as well as a dating and relationship coach working with individuals, couples, and families in private practice at 123 Maple Avenue in Cedarhurst, NY. To set up a consultation or to ask questions, please call 718-908-0512. Visit www.thenavidaters.com for more information. If you would like to submit a dating or relationship question to the panel anonymously, please email Jennifer MannLCSW@gmail.com. You can follow The Navidaters on FB and Instagram for dating and relationship advice.
where they would live and how they would raise their children.
The good news is that they realized their mistake and broke up before the wedding, rather than after the wedding.
Nonetheless, you certainly won’t go wrong by agreeing to go on a date with the young man. If the two of you do feel a connection after one or two dates, you will then have a very full, meaningful discussion about his previous misadventure.
a normal part of the life course, only you know what you can handle, what you want to handle, and what you want to deal with. The more people I work with and meet who winded up divorced, the more I hear the following: I wish I listened to my gut! I knew! But So-and-So pushed and insisted and told me things would be fine Always, always, always listen to your intuition!
Perhaps for you, a horrible case of retro-
active jealousy would kick in. And perhaps it wouldn’t, and this is your bashert. The thing is we have no way of knowing unless you go out on a date with him. How would you feel about going out on a date or two and paying close attention to your feelings? Date, and see what happens to this concern of yours. Let yourself be your own guide.
All the best, Jennifer
You must give a person a chance to show you who they really are without assumptions or impulses getting in the way.
Here are some great activities in Maryland that are family appropriate. While some you may recognize, others are off the beaten trail and can make for amazing Chol Hamoed trips. This list is just some suggestions and not an all inclusive list of things to do in Maryland.
Editor’s note: The costs and entry fees are based on information available online at the time of publishing. However prices may be different or have changed.
Antietam Battlefield
302 E Main St, Sharpsburg, MD 21782
9am - 5pm
$10/person | $20/vehicle | Annual Pass $35
BALTIMORE AND OHIO RAILROAD MUSEUM
901 W Pratt St, Baltimore, MD 21223
10am - 4pm
Child (2 - 12) $12 | Adult $20 | Senior (60+) $17
CLARK'S ELIOAK FARM
10500 Clarksville Pike, Ellicott City, MD 21042
CALVERT CLIFFS STATE PARK
10540 H G Trueman Rd, Lusby, MD 20657
7:30am - 5pm
$5/vehicle (+$2 for out-of-state residents)
S 10am - 5:30pm, M-F 10am - 5pm
$8 (Rides are Extra)
Farm | Petting Zoo | Miniature Train Rides | Fairy Tale Forest
CYLBURN ARBORETUM
4915 Greenspring Ave, Baltimore, MD 21209
T-S 8am - 8pm Free
Flower and Vegetable Gardens | Nature Education Center
FORT MCHENRY NATIONAL MONUMENT
2400 E Fort Ave, Baltimore, MD 21230
9am - 5pm
$15 (7 day pass)
$45 (annual pass) for up to four adults (16+)
Self-guided and Virtual Tours | Special Events Scheduled On Chol Hamoed. Check Website for Details.
GODDARD SPACE FLIGHT VISITOR CENTER
9432 Greenbelt Rd, Greenbelt, MD 20771
T-F 10am - 3pm, S 12pm - 4pm | Free
Research Laboratory for NASA | Spacecraft Displays and Space Technology | Model of the Hubble Space Telescope | Interactive Space Related Displays
IRVINE NATURE CENTER
11201 Garrison Forest Rd, Owings Mills, MD 21117
T-F 9am - 5pm | $5 (6+) Fridays are free
Trails | Open Wetlands | Upland Forests | Meadows | Farmland | Natural Habitats for Animals and Vegetation | Exhibition Hall with Exhibits for Children
MARYLAND ZOO
1 Safari Pl, Baltimore, MD 21217
10am - 4pm | $26, Senior Discount Online
MARYLAND SCIENCE CENTER
601 Light St, Baltimore, MD 21230
W-F 10pm, S 10am - 5pm
Adult (12- 61) $26.95 | Child (3-12) $25.95 |
Senior (62+) $20.95 | IMAX +$5
Exhibits | Planetarium | Observatory | IMAX Theater
PATAPSCO VALLEY STATE PARK
8020 Baltimore National Pk, Ellicott City, MD 21043
9am - Sunset
$2/vehicle (+$2 for out-of-state residents), +$1 on Weekends and Holidays
Picnic Areas | Camping | Playgrounds | Trails + Cascade Falls
NATIONAL AQUARIUM
501 E Pratt St, Baltimore, MD 21202
9am - 5pm
Child (5-20) $39.95 | Adult (21-69) $49.95 | Senior (70+) $39.95
RAWLINGS CONSERVATORY
3100 Swann Dr, Baltimore, MD 21217
W-S 10am - 4pm
Free (Recommended Donation $5/person)
Conservatory showcases many different types of flowers and other plants in five distinct greenhouse rooms.
PATUXENT RIVER NAVAL AIR MUSEUM
22156 Three Notch Rd, Lexington Park, MD 20653
T-Sat 10am - 5pm, S 12PM - 5PM
Child (5 - 12) $4 | Adult $10 | Active Duty and Seniors (60+) $7
Aircraft Displays | Galleries Exhibits | Flight Simulators (Sundays)
PORT DISCOVERY
35 Market Pl, Baltimore, MD 21202
F 9am - 5pm, S 11am - 5pm | $23.95
SkyClimber | Tot’s Trails | The Oasis | Overlook
AMF WOODLAWN LANES
6410 Security Blvd, Baltimore, MD 21207
Check online or call for hours.
Prices vary. Check online or call to see what special deals are currently running
BOWLERO PIKESVILLE LANES
1723 Reisterstown Rd, Pikesville, MD 21208
Check online or call for hours. Most days start at 4 PM and on Sundays opens at 12 PM
Prices vary. Check online or call to see what special deals they are currently running
BAUGHER’S FARMS
1015 Baugher Rd, Westminster, MD 21158
9am - 6pm
Fees Vary
Pick Your Own Fruits and Vegetables | Petting Zoo and Playgrounds
LARRILAND FARMS
2415 Woodbine Rd, Woodbine, MD 21797
T-F 9am - 6pm, S 9am - 5pm
Fees Vary
Pick Your Own Fruits and Vegetables
MAIN EVENT
10300 Little Patuxent Pkwy Suite 2520, Columbia, MD 21044
11am - 12am (check closing times if going late)
Prices depend on activities. They run special deals from time to time.
Video Arcades | Bowlings | Pool Tables And Laser Tag
CLIMB ZONE
13200 Mid Atlantic Blvd Ste 130, Laurel, MD 20708
10am - 6pm (Special Hours for Chol Hamoed and Isru Chag, October 2 – 6 and 9)
Prices Vary
ULTRAZONE LASER TAG
7835 Eastpoint Mall #11, Baltimore, MD 21224
S 12pm - 8pm, M-F 4pm - 8pm
$8.99 (1 Game), $19.99 (3 Games), All Day Passes Prices Vary on the Day
PLAYERS FUN ZONE
519 Old Westminster Pike, Westminster, MD 21157
S 11am - 6pm | T-F 4pm-10pm
M 1pm - 5pm (Special Chol Hamoed Hours)
Starting at $16
**Waiver Required
SIMCHAS BEIS HASHOEIVA
Agudath Israel, 6200 Park Heights Ave.
Sunday, October 1 10:30pm Free
JOEY NEWCOMB CHOL HAMOED CONCERT
Goucher College, Kraushaar Auditorium
Tuesday, October 3 6pm
Tickets start at $36 www.sukkosconcert.com
COMMUNITY SIMCHAS BEIS HASHOEIVA
Shomrei Emunah, 6221 Greenspring Ave.
Monday, Octoboer 2 8:30pm
Free
Tuesday, October 3 11am - 4pm
$12 (Food will be available for purchase)
Obstacle Courses | Giant Slides | Petting Zoo | Hay Rides | Moonbounces | Animal Encounters | Pony Rides | Carnival Games | Pickup Sports and a Lot More!
The well-aimed Syrian anti-tank shell sped towards its target. It pierced the armor of the Israeli tank and exploded, setting it on fire. The flaming vehicle belched clouds of black smoke as its fuel tank caught fire and the heat exploded its remaining ammunition. A green-clad figure desperately tried to leap out of the once-protective steel box that was fast turning into a crematorium.
From his own nearby tank, Brigadier-General Avigdor Kahalani watched, transfixed and horrified, as the young tank commander struggled for his life. There was nothing Kahalani could do to help him. In that burning soldier, Kahalani saw his younger self. He was there again, taken back six years and 150 miles. He was no longer fighting on the Syrian front in the 1973 Yom Kippur war
– he was back in the Egyptian-controlled Gaza Strip, and it was the night of June 5, 1967. Kahalani forced himself out of the paralysis which that terrible memory had momentarily plunged him into. He had a job to do.
The war Kahalani was fighting would produce few popular heroes. Israel’s most senior military and political leadership, still high on the fumes of the victory in the Six Day War, drove the country, open-eyed but unseeing, into the tsunami of Egypt and Syria’s coordinated offensives. Field commanders like Kahalani found themselves with the unenviable task of stemming the tide of invasion with an outnumbered, outgunned force, which they were sometimes forced to cobble together from the broken or scattered remains of original IDF units.
Kahalani’s actions during the Yom Kippur War would cast him as a figure of legend; a man who was destined to personify the IDF’s Armored Corps. Kahalani himself feels that his long, illustrious career in the Armored Corps was almost pre-ordained. It definitely wasn’t the career he envisioned for himself. In fact, Kahalani never wanted to serve in a tank, he never wanted to become a career officer, and his superiors at Officer Candidate School (OCS) did their best to fail him. But, as Kahalani told me in his wry, deliberate style, sometimes you turn right and G-d takes you left.
Pressed Into the Armored Corps
Kahalani had detested tanks ever since he was a child. He grew up listening to his father’s descriptions of his
own military service spent salvaging the burnt-out shells of tanks. Those stories instilled in the young Kahalani a deep fear of ending up like the poor souls from the tanks his father salvaged, roasted to death in the steel cage that was designed to protect them.
Biology and military bureaucracy combined to thwart Kahalani. Although the IDF initially planned to train Kahalani as a pilot, his commanders changed their mind when they discovered that he was deaf in one ear. Kahalani then volunteered to join the Paratrooper brigade, but his flat feet got him booted out. Sent back to the IDF Entrance Processing Station, Kahalani begged to serve anywhere but the Armored Corps. The recruiting officer was unmoved by the young man’s pleas – and sent him straight to the tanks.
Kahalani’s initial dismay did not stop him from excelling. His commanders soon decided that he was cut out to be an officer and sent him to Officer Candidate School (OCS.)
OCS was a rollercoaster. But when Kahalani describes his experiences there, he does it in his usual calm, slow, almost unemotional style. He refuses to go into the uglier details. Kahalani’s loyalty to the military seems to prevent him from delving into the gory details of what army politics looked like nearly sixty years ago. He contents himself with saying that the commanders at OCS did their best to fail him. Despite Kahalani’s receiving top grades, they succeeded in tossing him out after a month.
Their reasoning? Kahalani “lacked leadership ability.”
For the first time in our conversation, I detect the hint of a smile in Kahalani’s voice. The irony isn’t lost on him either. In the following ten years, Kahalani would receive both the Medal of Valor and the Distinguished Service Medal, Israel’s highest and third-highest military awards, for showing exceptional leadership.
But in the meantime, Kahalani was discovering that politics could give as well as take: the commander of the Armored Corps, David Eliezer, intervened and forced OCS to re-admit Kahalani. Not that Eliezer cared about Kahalani personally. Eliezer’s problem with OCS was that it had culled so many of his cadets that he feared an officer shortage. Kahalani returned to OCS and went on to graduate at the top of his class. However, his unwholesome experience with inter-army politics was not over. Kahalani’s promotion was withheld for nine months, during which he found himself in the ridiculous position of an acting platoon commander, issuing orders to
men who officially outranked him.
Kahalani’s eventual promotion was not enough to persuade him to become a career officer. He still planned on leaving the army as soon as his term of mandatory service expired. He looked forward to his next job: running his father’s automobile repair shop. Then, just two weeks before his term of service was due to expire, Kahalani received an offer he couldn’t resist.
Germany would have thoroughly shocked and enraged most Israelis.
The same was true for many of the soldiers on the expedition. Their parents had suffered through the Holocaust. Their extended families had all been murdered by the Nazis. Some of those officers had grown up speaking Yiddish and were culturally and emotionally grounded in the still-smoking ashes of European Jewry. For them, every interaction with soldiers
of Patton tanks. On June 5, 1967, those newly-acquired tanks saw action for the first time.
History remembers the Six Day War as a swift, brilliant Israeli victory. But for Kahalani, the war lasted much longer, beginning three weeks before the first shot was even fired.
During those tense weeks, Kahalani’s fourteen Pattons were stationed on the border of the Egyptian-held Gaza Strip, tensely waiting for war to break out at any moment. Israel’s political leaders spent those weeks trying to ward off the inevitable conflict. On the home front, civilians prepared for a lifeand-death struggle: bomb shelters were prepared, and plans were made to transform public parks into mass graveyards. However, on the border, Kahalani and his tank crews just had to wait. There was nothing they could do to take their minds off the tension, which mounted with each passing day.
Armor Command was about to receive a shipment of new Patton tanks, but there was one problem: Israeli soldiers did not know how to operate those advanced American weapons. So, Armor Command would send its best officers to a special training camp in West Germany, and Kahalani was invited. But there was a catch: Armored Command didn’t want to expend its limited resources on officers who were about to quit the force, so Kahalani had to sign on for an extra two years.
He signed.
The expedition was top-secret, and not just for military reasons. The Holocaust had ended only twenty years earlier. The pain was still raw. No matter how useful, any form of cooperation with
from the Wehrmacht’s successor-army was a nauseating emotional rollercoaster.
Kahalani had a slightly easier time; born to a Yemenite family, he didn’t lose any of his close relatives to the Holocaust, so the pain wasn’t as personal.
Because anything to do with Germany was so emotionally loaded, there was a real risk of the expedition turning into a complete disaster. There was always a chance that angry IDF officers might pick a fight with the Germans or that news of the expedition would leak out. The IDF was taking no risks: it ordered the delegation to limit communication with the Germans to a bare minimum. Any “unnecessary activity,” even the renting of cars, was strictly forbidden.
Upon returning to Israel, Kahalani was given command of a company
That tension exploded when Israel finally launched its preemptive strike. Kahalani’s tank was the first to roll across the border, its crew propelled by weeks of fear and anguish. That tank was soon immobilized by an Egyptian shell. Kahalani immediately transferred into a second tank. When that second tank was hit, he moved into a third – always fighting on the front line, always pushing forward. Kahalani’s run ended that evening, when his tank drove straight into an Egyptian ambush near the town of Rafah, on the southern tip of the Gaza Strip. Kahalani’s tank was hit once again. Engulfed in flames, its four crew members desperately struggled to escape. Kahalani was one of the three who succeeded, but not before he was burned all over. His childhood nightmare had materialized.
He almost relishes the chance to voice his deepest fears – it is his way of confronting and overcoming an otherwise-unbearable pain.
Seven long hours passed before Kahalani arrived at the hospital. He was severely wounded – sixty percent of his body was covered in third-degree burns. The hospital discharged him after a year, but Kahalani was far from cured. He was physically disabled and suffering from what he would later identify as post-traumatic stress disorder. As people who have suffered through horrors similar to his know, PTSD is incurable. The smell of steak sizzling on the grill, the sudden cough of a car’s exhaust pipe, or even just a bad dream might be all it takes to trigger a flashback. The post-traumatic victim is suddenly no longer the master of his emotions: he is suddenly reliving the horror that scarred him for life; sweat pours down his forehead, he feels the debilitating pain, the choking fear, that terrible paralyzing feeling of helplessness. He often becomes a wreck, both physically and emotionally.
That’s how the army saw Kahalani: a wreck whose useful days were past. Friends and family agreed that Kahalani should retire from military service; he had been through enough. Yet Kahalani was not willing to go just yet. Retiring would have meant admitting that he was a victim, forced by circumstances to give up on the life he had chosen for himself. Besides, Kahalani realized that he had grown to love the Armored Corps, and he didn’t want to lose the sense of purpose that his service gave him. He decided to return to the Corps.
Kahalani knew that entering the cramped, confined interior of a tank after being burned alive the last time he sat in one would be terrifying, and it was. As he puts it, rejoining the corps “was the bravest decision I have ever made.”
Kahalani doesn’t seem to mind when I ask him to elaborate on the most pain-
ful moment of his life. As far as he sees it, I am not asking him to re-open old wounds; he knows that he cannot escape those terrible memories. So he almost relishes the chance to voice his deepest fears – it is his way of confronting and overcoming an otherwise-unbearable pain.
It took years, but the army eventually rewarded Kahalani’s perseverance by giving him command of the 77 th bat-
of Egypt’s former president Nasser. However, Israel didn’t know what to make of Marwan and his tip-offs. The Mossad trusted him, but military intelligence saw Marwan as a backstabbing double agent whom the Egyptians were using to mislead Israel. To this day, it is unclear whether Marwan was an Egyptian plant. His mysterious death, just over fifteen years ago, did nothing to clear the mys-
Hussein’s warning was unreliable. What was reliable, they thought, was a recent report by Israeli academics. It concluded that the Arab countries were too cowed by their defeat in the Six Day War to try again. The academics argued that even if the Arabs were stupid enough to attack, so much the better. Israel would just thrash them for a second time.
That optimistic opinion was all too easy for Israel’s political leaders to adopt. Preparing for a potential war would mean mobilizing the country’s reservists, which would harm the economy. Wreaking economic havoc in order to ward off an attack that might never come, a month before a general election, was too risky for the ruling party.
talion, part of the Sinai-based Seventh Armored Brigade.
The tranquility Kahalani enjoyed in Sinai was misleading. Egypt and Syria, two of the big losers of the Six Day War, were busy preparing their revenge tour. They wanted to prove to themselves and to the whole Arab world that the Six Day War was nothing more than a temporary setback, a shameful blot on Arab pride that future victories would scrub off the history books. Time and treasure was expended on re-armament, military reforms, and complex invasion plans.
Israeli intelligence wasn’t wholly ignorant of the coming attacks. The Mossad received regular tip-offs from none other than Ashraf Marwan, a son-in-law
tery. The assassins who pushed Marwan off his fifth-floor balcony probably knew what his game was, but they are keeping quiet.
Marwan was not the only Arab who warned Israel of the coming war. On September 25, 1973, King Hussein of Jordan secretly flew to Tel Aviv to deliver his own personal warning. Hussein’s motives are easier to understand than Marwan’s: Hussein viewed the upcoming war as an existential threat to Jordan. As the biggest loser of the Six Day war, Hussein was worried of getting sucked into a similar disaster. He wanted to make it clear to the Israelis that he was not their enemy and that they should therefore not retaliate too harshly if Arab public opinion eventually forced Jordan to join Egypt and Syria.
Again, military intelligence thought
However, unlike politicians and military intelligence, Northern Command couldn’t afford to ignore the mounting evidence. The Syrians were massing in overwhelming numbers just across the border – not the typical reaction of a cowed or fearful army. And so, despite the General Staff’s assurances, Northern Command demanded reinforcements. On October 26, the eve of Rosh Hashana, the General Staff gave in and sent Kahalani’s 77 th Armored Battalion from the Sinai to the Golan Heights. Other units of the 7 th Brigade followed a few days later.
The 7 th Armored Brigade, trained to fight in the sandy, flattish Sinai desert, found the rocky, broken terrain of the Golan Heights unfamiliar and perhaps even disconcerting. Kahalani and his fellow officers, believing that they had to prepare for upcoming border clashes, scrambled to study the new terrain and the unfamiliar enemy. It wasn’t easy, but those ten days of preparation would prove invaluable.
The officers at Northern Command’s intelligence department anticipated more than the limited border clashes that Kahalani and his fellow officers ex-
kahalani knew that entering the cramped, confined interior of a tank after being burned alive the last time he sat in one would be terrifying – and it was.The terrain in the Golan was far from smooth
pected. They believed that a full-blown war was imminent, and they persuaded Northern Command to prepare accordingly. Those intelligence officers were lucky. Their unfortunate colleagues from the Military Intelligence Directorate who agreed with their assessment could do nothing to convince their superiors of the impending danger. Relegated to the unenviable Role of Cassandra, they could only watch helplessly as the disaster they tried to avert finally materialized, shaking Israeli society to its core. The price they paid for being right was a terrible mental anguish that eventually drove at least one of those officers temporarily insane.
On October 4, 1973, the eve of Yom Kippur, Ashraf Marwan issued his final unheeded warning: Egypt and Syria would attack at sunset the next day.
Marwan was wrong. The Syrians attacked not at sunset, but at two o’clock in the afternoon. The plan was simple: one division would break through from the south, while a second would simultaneously break through from the north. Together, the two divisions were to trap and envelop the Israeli forces in a powerful pincer move. The southern prong of the pincer largely achieved its objective, overrunning the Israeli positions in less than twenty-four hours. However, the northern arm of the pincer ran into stiff resistance. In what became known to history as the Valley of Tears battle, the Syrian Seventh Division spent four days attempting to break through the Israeli defenses. The officers of the 7 th Armored Brigade made the most of their freshly-acquired knowledge of the broken terrain to trap and ambush advancing Syrian columns. Although Kahalani’s 77 th battalion started the battle in reserve, it soon found itself fighting on the frontlines. With the Syrian tanks outnumbering the Israelis
five-to-one, the 77 th was just too precious to be kept in reserve for long. The Israeli gunners made good use of their longer firing range and their rapid rate of fire –a typical Israeli gunner fired more than twice as fast as his Syrian counterpart – to check the Syrian advance less than three miles from the border. However, those advantages only lasted during the daytime. Once night fell, the Syrians’ su-
ly wasn’t willing to lose the battle.
After three days of desperate fighting, the Israelis were hanging on by a thread, but the general outlook had become much more favorable. Miles away, in the Southern Golan, the IDF had counter-attacked and was steadily rolling the enemy back. The Syrians were running out of time to save their offensive. More pertinently for Kahalani, the Syrians on his front were
the valley into a death trap. The Syrian offensive was over.
The war officially ended two weeks later, and Israel slowly came to terms with its terrible human cost. Kahalani had lost a brother, a brother-in-law, and many comrades-in-arms. What made the loss even more painful was the fact that it was partly avoidable: a little less complacency from the national leadership and a little more night-vision equipment could have made a huge difference.
Despite his anger and the grief, Kahalani refused to participate in the post-war protests that eventually forced the government’s collapse. Kahalani was still a soldier, and soldiers are not supposed to play politics.
perior night-vision equipment gave them a huge advantage.
The lack of decent night-vision equipment infuriated Kahalani. The IDF did, in fact, own some, but army quartermasters considered it too precious to “waste” on frontline units like Kahalani’s. He and his men were forced to expose themselves needlessly because of the higher-ups’ penny-pinching. Kahalani felt betrayed.
But Kahalani wasn’t fighting for politicians or higher-ups. He was fighting for his comrades-in-arms. As a commander, he felt the need to lead his men and demonstrate that he was in control of the situation, which he knew to be desperate. Kahalani saw nearby tanks hit, he saw his comrades fall, he suffered flashbacks from his own near-death experience in Rafah. But Kahalani still believed that the Israelis could win, and he knew that his men were looking up to him. He didn’t want to let his men down, he didn’t want to lose control of his unit, and he definite -
leaderless. Their dynamic commander, Brigadier-General Omar al-Abrash, was dead; probably assassinated by his own superiors for criticizing their plans.
The next morning, the Syrians made one final attempt to break through. Even without their commander, they almost made it. The Israelis were worn out, and their ammunition was nearly exhausted. The situation was so dire that one commander requested permission to withdraw. He had done his best, but his tanks were no longer capable of fighting – they had only two shells remaining apiece. He was ordered to hold on for another ten minutes.
In the meantime, Kahalani counter-attacked. Leading his own battered 7 th Brigade, he rallied around him the tattered remnants of other brigades of the 7 th battalion and cleared the Syrians from a nearby hill which overlooked the Valley of Tears. His tanks then directed their fire on the Syrian armor below, turning
although Kahalani retired from the army sixteen years after the war, he remains closely involved with the IDF to this day. He continues educating Israelis about the Armored Corps and sharing his own personal experiences.
Was Kahalani’s generation unique in its willingness to make the ultimate sacrifice for the country? Kahalani thinks not. His experience with young Israelis has persuaded him that they are just as patriotic as their predecessors.
However, Kahalani notes that there has been a major change from his time in the army. Bad commanders can no longer abuse their power unchecked.
Today’s soldiers are more aware of their rights than any previous generation; they know that if the army fails to take their grievances seriously, their parents would just take their stories to the press.
The result, according to Kahalani, is that soldiers are no longer willing to blindly follow bad commanders. The onus is now on the leadership to hold itself to a higher standard than ever and to lead by example – as Kahalani himself did in the Valley of Tears.
a s far as he sees it, i am not asking him
to re-open old wounds; he knows that he cannot escape those terrible memories.
With their herby vibe and mouthwatering aiolis, you won’t be able to stop eating these. Be sure to double the aioli sauces. They are so good that you’ll want to use them on everything.
IngredIents
›› 2 lb ground lamb
›› 1 egg
›› ¼ cup grated onion
›› 3 cloves garlic, crushed
›› 1 tsp dried parsley flakes
›› 1 tsp sumac, optional
›› ¾- 1 tsp dried oregano
›› 1 tsp kosher salt
›› ½ tsp coarsely ground black pepper
›› pinch cayenne pepper
›› 3 Tbsp extra light olive oil
Creamy Lemon-Garlic Aioli
›› ½ cup mayonnaise
›› 2 cloves garlic, crushed
›› 2 Tbsp lemon juice
›› 4 tsp olive oil
›› 1 tsp lemon zest
Horseradish Aioli
›› ½ cup mayonnaise
›› 2 Tbsp prepared white horseradish
›› 1 Tbsp lemon juice
›› ½ tsp smoked paprika
Special Equipment
›› 16 wooden skewers, soaked in water for 20-30 minutes
PreParat Ion
Preheat oven to 400°F. l ine a baking sheet with parchment paper. in a large bowl, combine lamb, egg, onion, garlic, parsley, sumac (if using), oregano, salt, pepper, and cayenne. Form mixture into 16 torpedoes; thread onto soaked skewers. Place on prepared baking sheet.
Brush torpedoes with oil; bake until golden and cooked through, about 20 minutes, turning torpedoes after 10 minutes.
alternatively, grill torpedoes. Heat grill; grill torpedoes for 3 minutes. Flip; grill for an additional 3-5 minutes.
Prepare the aiolis: i n a small bowl, whisk together all creamy lemongarlic aioli ingredients. in a second bowl, whisk together all horseradish aioli ingredients.
Serve torpedoes warm or at room temperature, accompanied by the aioli dipping sauces.
VarI atIon a ny ground meat can be subbed in for the lamb.
With beef, barley, and vegetables, this soup is hearty enough to be a full meal. There’s nothing more satisfying than a big, steaming bowl on a cold winter day.
IngredIents
›› 3 Tbsp olive oil, divided
›› 1 lb. gourmet flanken on the bone
›› 1 Tbsp kosher salt + more to taste
›› Black pepper, to taste
›› 1 large onion, diced
›› 2 cloves garlic, crushed
›› 1 rib celery, diced
›› 24 oz baby bella mushrooms, sliced
›› 4 Tbsp sherry cooking wine
›› ½ cup barley, rinsed
›› 7 cups water
›› 2 bay leaves
›› 4 Tbsp low sodium soy sauce
›› 1 tsp umami powder, optional
PreParat Ion
Heat an 8-quart pot or Dutch oven over medium-high heat. add 2 tablespoons oil. Season meat generously with salt and pepper. Sear meat until well browned on all sides (about 15 minutes). Transfer to a platter; set aside.
l ower heat to medium. add remaining tablespoon olive oil, onion, garlic, and celery to the pot; sauté until tender (about 10 minutes). add mushrooms with a sprinkle of salt and pepper. Cook, uncovered, until mushrooms are soft. add sherry wine, raise heat, and cook until liquid reduces.
Return meat to the pot. a dd water and bay leaves. Bring to a boil. adjust heat to maintain a gentle simmer. Cover; cook for 1½ hours, until meat is tender.
a dd barley, soy sauce, 1 tablespoon salt, and umami powder, if using. Continue to simmer for an additional 30-45 minutes.
Remove meat and bay leaves from the soup. Discard bay leaves. Cut meat from the bone, dice, and return to soup. if desired, season with additional salt and pepper to taste.
tIP
if reheating soup, you may need to add water, since the barley tends to absorb lots of liquid.
no need to worry; although there is actual bourbon in the recipe, the alcohol has plenty of time to burn off during the slow cooking process. What’s left is a slightly smoky flavor that pairs perfectly with all the other ingredients. Get ready to use your hands when you dig into these soft, succulent ribs.
IngredIents
›› 10 spare ribs
›› Spice Rub
›› 3 Tbsp dark brown sugar
›› 1 Tbsp garlic powder
›› 1 Tbsp chili powder
›› 1 tsp ground mustard
›› 1 tsp smoked paprika
›› ½ Tbsp kosher salt
›› ¼ tsp coarsely ground black pepper
›› ¼ tsp cayenne pepper
Bourbon Glaze
›› ½ cup bourbon
›› ½ cup dark brown sugar
›› ¼ cup pure maple syrup
›› ¼ cup prepared white horseradish
›› ¼ cup apple cider vinegar
›› 2 Tbsp Dijon mustard
›› 2 Tbsp fish-free Worcestershire sauce
PreParat Ion
Prepare the spice rub: in a small bowl, combine spice rub ingredients.
Place ribs into a 9x13-inch pan. Season with spice rub.
Prepare the bourbon glaze: in a small bowl, whisk together glaze ingredients.
Pour glaze over the ribs. Cover pan tightly with foil; marinate overnight in the fridge. (i f pressed for time, marinate for at least 30 minutes on the counter.)
Preheat oven to 325°F.
Bake, covered, for 2½-3 hours.
Question: After diligently maxing out my annual contributions to a Roth IRA in my early career, I am now fully phased out of the Roth IRA contribution income limit for a single taxpayer. While I still contribute to my employer sponsored retirement plan, can I truly never contribute to a Roth retirement account unless my annual income drops?
Dear CommonCents Reader,
Thank you for submitting your question. Your observation regarding the Roth IRA income limits for single taxpayers is absolutely correct. As your income has grown and you now find yourself fully phased out of the direct Roth IRA contribution eligibility, it’s understandable that you may be wondering if there are any other options for contributing to a Roth retirement account. The good news is that there is indeed a potential solution: the Backdoor Roth IRA strategy.
Introduction: The Backdoor Roth IRA is a popular financial strategy used by high-income earners who are phased out of direct Roth IRA contributions. This method allows them to still contribute to a Roth retirement account by utilizing a two-step process that involves a traditional IRA conversion into a Roth IRA. While it can be a valuable tool for tax-efficient retirement planning, it requires careful consideration and execution to avoid potential pitfalls and tax complications. In this article, we’ll delve into the details, logistics, and potential pitfalls of the Backdoor Roth IRA strategy.
Understanding the Roth IRA Income Limits: Roth IRA contributions are subject to income limits, beyond which taxpayers are ineligible to make direct contributions. These limits are based on modified adjusted gross income (MAGI) and vary depending on the taxpayer’s filing status. For the 2023 tax year, those limits are:
• Single taxpayers: The phaseout range begins at $138,000
and completely phases out at $153,000.
• Married filing jointly: The phaseout range begins at $218,000 and completely phases out at $228,000.
As you mentioned being fully phased out of the Roth IRA contribution income limit, you cannot make direct Roth IRA contributions. However, this does not mean you’re out of options for contributing to a Roth retirement account.
The Backdoor Roth IRA Strategy: The Backdoor Roth IRA strategy allows individuals who exceed the income limits to still contribute to a Roth IRA indirectly. Here’s how it works:
Step 1: Make a Non-Deductible
Traditional IRA Contribution: Since there are no income limits for contributing to a traditional IRA, you can make a non-deductible contribution regardless of your income level. It’s important to note that if you already have a pre-tax IRA, such as a rollover IRA from a 401(k), this strategy may be less effective due to the pro-rata rule (explained later).
Step 2: Convert the Traditional IRA to a Roth IRA: After making the non-deductible contribution to the traditional IRA, you can convert the amount to a Roth IRA. The conversion involves moving the funds from the traditional IRA to the Roth IRA. Since you’ve already paid taxes on the non-deductible contribution, there will be no additional tax liability on the converted amount. This is the essential step that completes the Backdoor Roth IRA process.
Once these steps are completed, you will find yourself in the same position as when you were making direct Roth IRA contributions. The backdoor Roth IRA strategy is often touted as one of the biggest legal loopholes in the US tax code and as of now, there has been no enacted legislation to close it.
By Elliot Pepper, CPA, CFP®, MSTLogistics and Potential Pitfalls:
• Pro-Rata Rule: The pro-rata rule can complicate the Backdoor Roth IRA strategy for individuals with existing pre-tax IRA balances. The rule states that when converting a traditional IRA to a Roth IRA, you cannot isolate the non-deductible contributions. Instead, you must consider all of your IRA balances as a whole. This means that if you have pretax IRA funds, a portion of the conversion will be treated as taxable income, negating some of the tax benefits of the Backdoor Roth IRA strategy. To avoid this, consider rolling pre-tax IRA funds into a 401(k) if your employer plan allows it.
• Tax Implications: While the Backdoor Roth IRA strategy is generally tax-efficient, it’s essential to be aware of the potential tax implications. Any pre-tax gains or earnings in the traditional IRA will be subject to income tax upon conversion. Therefore, it’s recommended to convert the non-deductible contribution quickly to minimize the tax impact.
Conclusion: The Backdoor Roth IRA strategy can be a valuable tool for high-income earners seeking to maximize their retirement savings and take advantage of tax-free growth. However, it’s crucial to understand the logistics and potential pitfalls associated with this approach. To ensure you execute the strategy correctly and in a tax-efficient manner, consider consulting with a qualified financial advisor or tax professional who can tailor the strategy to your specific financial situation. By taking the necessary precautions and being well-informed, you can make the most of the Backdoor Roth IRA and secure a more comfortable retirement.
Common Cents is now digital on YouTube @CommonCents613
The decision to start saving and investing is yours, but the “how” can be hard. Email commoncents@northbrookfinancial.com to schedule a free financial planning consultation with our team.
Elliot Pepper, CPA, CFP®, MST is Co-Founder of Northbrook Financial, a Financial Planning, Tax, and Investment Management Firm. He has developed and continues to teach a popular Financial Literacy course for high school students.
Iam soaked. And Sukkos hasn’t even started. That’s from the sweating and hard work!
But what about the times when we go out and we go in? We go out and we go in. The clouds look ominous. The thunder hints great warning signs. And then a sudden downpour follows!
But, just as suddenly, the sun comes out.
We wipe the table. We wipe the chairs. We even get smartand tilt the chairs. Yay!
Finally everything’s dry. And then we realize the schach is still drip-drip-dripping.
That’s not the only Sukkos challenge.
We get those lopsided signs all around. The ones we hung perfectly straight, but with time and the outside elements around, they tilt in every which direction.
We are tortured not knowing if we can adjust them on the holiday or must leave them askew. So we are now seeing the Kotel vertically. And the ushpizin where Yosef seems to proceed Avraham or is it just upside down?
And worst of all, there is a picture that has the honey spilling over the apple instead of the other way around. This traumatizing the new generation of tots who come prepared with that cute, and yes
somewhat irritating song, “Dip the apple in the honey.” They are wondering: Why is the honey pouring itself over the apple?
Then, we also get that one visitor who says, “Is that tree branch hanging a little bit too far over your sukkah?”
And you’re thinking, “Did I even invite that guy? Who asked him to look up any-
bered a bag. And maybe even a muzzle. Because, those kids are going to be sooo hyper tonight.
We can’t forget to address the challenge of space. Getting everyone in is the first challenge. And then getting around the table to sit or serve or even exit at all. Especially, once everyone’s seated.
the whole neighborhood all year round, and that’s how he put up his sukkah. Door connected to door. How anyone figured out which one was the one that opened as the entrance was a real mystery to all us. But once we got in, we loved being together.
My grandmother would hand the food out her back bedroom window, and we somehow would get it into the sukkah that way and enjoy a feast.
These are some of our best family memories.
Now, of course, they make more sophisticated sukkahs with only one or two doors to get in and out. I guess you could say – when one door (dor) closes another one opens!
way? Don’t I have enough delicious stuff on the table for him to have kiddush and go sukkah hopping some more. Now, I have to feel all nervous I messed up on my sukkah spot when I can’t do anything about it anymore.”
And speaking of “sukkah hops.” Those, at least, are always such fun and a giant blast…
For the kids, though!
You’re shlepping behind, juggling the baby, the junk, and wishing you’d remem-
Also, how close or how far did you put the sukkah from your kitchen where all the food originates from? That’s always another fun detail to figure out when putting up a sukkah!
So is it all worth it?
Yes, you bet!
Life is boring without the challenges. And the best memories come from our sukkah experiences.
We, in our family, all remember that my grandfather collected discarded doors from
Enjoy your family, your company, and your recognition that it’s not our homes that protect us but what’s in heaven above, and feast on the wonderful memories you will be making this Sukkos.
Rivki Rosenwald is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist working with both couples and individuals and is a certified relationship counselor. Rivki is a co-founder and creator of an effective Parent Management of Adolescent Years Program. She can be contacted at 917705-2004 or at rivkirosenwald@gmail.com.
In the years following the establishment of the state of Israel in 1948, the IDF grew in size and capabilities. Paratroop units were formed and were mainly tasked with reprisal raids against Arab attacks. In 1956, an international crisis was brewing between Egypt and Western allies as the new Egyptian president, Gamal Abdel Nasser, nationalized the Suez Canal. Israel was also alarmed by the large amount of weapons and arms Egypt had received from the USSR via Czechoslovakia. France and England wanted Israel to get involved so they could attack Egypt. The first troops in the area were paratroopers, who had early success but ran into stiff resistance in an area called Mitla Pass.
Like the Golan Heights, the Mitla Pass in the Sinai Peninsula is a strategic area that militaries used for their advantage. It was the site of battles in the 1956 Suez Crisis, the Six Day War, and the Yom Kippur War. In 1956, paratroopers were used to secure other areas in the Peninsula, but their commander wanted the Pass in Israeli hands.
In 1949, non-Jewish Machal veteran Tom Derek Bowden, who was born in Britain, was tasked by Chaim Lasker, future chief of staff for the IDF, to create a paratrooper school. He did so and wrote a training manual. Soon, the school grew, and by 1956, the paratroopers were an experienced unit ready for battle in the Sinai Peninsula. Raful Eitan jumped with his paratroopers deep behind the front lines while Ariel Sharon crossed the border. The paratroopers soon linked up as their objectives were secured. However, Sharon wanted the Mitla Pass so he could be the first one to reach the Suez Canal.
Sharon was twice denied permission to attack the Pass, which was a winding mountainous road. However, he soon was given the opportunity to send a patrol to scout out the defenses. Several half tracks and a large group of paratroopers were part of this patrol under the command of Motta Gur. Right away, they fell into the ambush that the dug-in Egyptians had prepared in the Pass. The Egyptian defenses were three-tiered, and during the battle, it was difficult for the Israelis to pinpoint where the enemy was entrenched. The rest of the paratroopers were sent in to rescue the patrol, but they too were met with heavy fire. A volunteer was needed to scout out and locate the enemy positions. Even though he knew he was going to draw enemy fire, Yehuda KenDror immediately volunteered. Ken-Dror drove his jeep towards the enemy positions, and the Egyptians hiding in the ridges shot and mortally wounded the paratrooper. He died two months later and was awarded the Medal of Valor posthumously for his sacrifice.
Finally, the Israelis managed to locate the Egyptian
positions, but the fighting wasn’t over. Two Israeli tanks blasted away many enemy positions, and the paratroopers were able to use machine guns against the Egyptians who were now dislodged from their hideouts. Two more paratrooper companies came from the far end of the Pass to mop up more Egyptian positions, and by nightfall, fifty paratroopers scaled the hills. The fighting continued as the Israelis sought to completely annihilate all enemy resistance. The Egyptians fought a desperate battle as they were trapped, but ultimately, the Israelis were in complete control of the Mitla Pass.
Control of the Pass came at a steep cost. Forty Israelis were killed and 120 more were wounded as the brave paratroopers inflicted over 200 Egyptian casualties. As for the bigger picture of the Suez Crisis, the Egyptians made a fatal error when they thought the paratroopers were just part of a small-scale raid and not a full invasion. They were taken by surprise, and the Israelis quickly achieved their initial objectives near the Mitla Pass.
British paratroopers landed along the Canal on November 5 followed by a commando invasion in the key canal port of Port Said. French paratroopers soon joined them, and they were given air cover by the air forces and navies of all three nations. While the forces were winning the war on the battlefield, the politicians were losing it on the home front. It was an unpopular war, and soon all gains in the Sinai Desert had to be abandoned as they buckled under political pressure. The Egyptians won the political battle, even though they suffered heavy losses. The Canal Zone was closed for commercial shipping until March 1957. Even though the Israelis had to give up the Sinai, they were now able to use the Straits of Tiran for shipping which had previously been closed since 1951. They had also won the sympathy from the U.S. since Eisenhower regretted forcing the Israelis to withdraw their troops.
Historians debate whether or not the battle was necessary, and Ariel Sharon received a lot of criticism for his actions of sending the troops into the Pass altogether. Still, it showed that the paratroopers under Sharon were able to fight against a well-entrenched enemy and that the IDF doesn’t give up or leave soldiers abandoned on the battlefield. The Forgotten Heroes at the Battle of the Mitla Pass is history to be remembered.
Avi Heiligman is a weekly contributor to The Jewish Home. He welcomes your comments and suggestions for future columns and can be reached at aviheiligman@gmail.com.
Note: Not all submission have been published. Keep sending in your artwork for another chance to be featured!
The weather is cooling and the rain has started to pour, and that means Official Tax Planning Season™ is in full swing. But instead of thinking about savings, millions of taxpayers are celebrating something else. No, it’s not pumpkin spice. It’s football! High schools play on Friday nights. Colleges play on Saturdays. And the pros play whenever they can find someone to pony up for broadcast rights, which means that pretty soon you’ll be able to spend every single night watching burly men collide into each other as team doctors huddle nervously on sidelines watching for concussions. Free agent quarterback Aaron Rodgers signed for 75 $ million in guaranteed earnings to play for the Jets – and his season ended after just four plays.
The Cincinnati Bengals have had two great seasons since signing Heisman Trophy winner Joe Burrow. Earlier this month, the usually frugal team set a new league record, re-signing Burrow to a $275 million contract that makes him the highest-paid player in NFL history. Naturally, that got us wondering: how much of that bounty will he actually keep?
NFL salaries start at $750,000, spread out over 18 weeks of the regular season. Quarterbacks average $4.8
million per year. And while you might think QBs are the highest-paid players, that honor actually goes to left tackles at $8.9 million. Those numbers are high enough that the IRS intercepts the maximum 40.8% in income and payroll taxes for at least part of nearly everyone’s pay.
But players face a defensive line of state and local taxes depending on where they play each game. So, Burrow plays half of his games this season in Cincinnati, where he gets sacked for 3.99% in state income tax and 2.1% in city payroll tax. That’s far less than players in high-tax states like California, where they can face a 13.3% rate, or New Jersey, where the Jets and Giants pay as much as 10.75%.
What about away games? Most cities and states levy “jock taxes” to collect the same rates from visitors as locals. This
year, Burrow gets sacked for a 5.75% Maryland rate for a game against the Ravens and a 13.3% California rate for a game against the 49ers.
The real winners are the players with no home state income tax at all: the Titans in tax-free Tennessee (say that five times fast), the Dolphins, Buccaneers, and Jaguars in Florida, the Cowboys
London, England. Whole ‘nother country. American-style football may or may not take off in the birthplace of soccer hooliganism. But King Charles III will surely appreciate his chance to extract some taxes. Hopefully, he won’t abuse that privilege like the last King Charles!
In 2019, an economist named Erik Hembre used data from football, baseball, basketball, and hockey to investigate whether state taxes affect win rates. He found that “higher income tax rates lower team performance, with a percentage point increase in state income tax rates decreasing team win percentage between 0.77 to 0.86 points.” So, in plain English, yes, they do.
and Texans in Texas, the Raiders (now) in tax-free Nevada, and the Seahawks in Washington. None of them are favored to come home with Super Bowl rings this particular season. But that’s OK because the unburdened players can buy their own with the money they save by not paying state governments on top of Uncle Sam.
Finally, five teams face a special hurdle this season. The Falcons, Jaguars, Bills, Ravens, and Titans all play in
Here’s the final score for this week’s story. Sometimes, where you make your money matters just as much as how you make it and how much of it you make. So call us before playoff season to make sure you’re paying as little as possible!
Allan J Rolnick is a CPA who has been in practice for over 30 years in Queens, NY. He welcomes your comments and can be reached at 718-896-8715 or at allanjrcpa@aol.com.
And while you might think QBs are the highest-paid players, that honor actually goes to left tackles at $8.9 million.
THE PROGRAM CONTINUES ON ISRU CHAG, OCTOBER 9 TH
