baystateparent magazine September 2019

PRICELESS

SEPTEMBER 2019

Massachusetts’ Premier Magazine For Families Since 1996

The Enrichment Issue

TEENAGE SUICIDE

It’s Time to Start Talking About It

ARTS FOR ALL

Sensory-Friendly Venues

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Museums Free This Month

Including

the

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EcoTarium

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contents SEPTEMBER 2019 VOLUME 24

features 19 30 Museums Offering

Free Admission This Month

26 After Tragic Loss, Local Family

Urges Parents to Open Up Conversation About Suicide

34 Pick-Your-Own:

2019 Apple Orchard Guide

38 Parents, Let the Coach do

the Coaching

39 Keeping the Fun in Children’s Sports 40 Clutter-Free Ways to Save Your

Child’s Artwork

42 Does Your Kid Need a Tutor?

When to Look for Outside Help

in every issue 6

Momma to the Max

7

Cyber Savvy Mom

8

Herding Goofballs

10 On the Agenda 23 Our Fave Four 29 Bites 36 Very Special People 44 Finally Forever 47 Take Eight

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NUMBER 5

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baystateparent president PAUL M. PROVOST associate publisher KATHY REAL BENOIT 508-767-9525 kbenoit@gatehousemedia.com

momma to the

MAX

Let’s Start Talking

CREATIVE editor in chief AMANDA COLLINS BERNIER 508-767-9526 acollins@gatehousemedia.com

We sat in their backyard on a hot summer day, and, like most parents, talked about our kids. I told them about my 2-year-old son, Max, and they told me about their kids -- teenagers Emily and Nicholas, and their oldest, Alexandra.

Emily and Nicholas were home, but like typical teens, stayed upstairs in their bedrooms. Alexandra wasn’t there. Instead, her absence was the reason I was there; sitting in a stranger’s backyard, listening as they generously poured out bits of their broken hearts.

Alexandra Valoras was a studious super-achiever. A thinker, a giver, a high school junior who had the world in front of her. A year-and-a-half ago, the 17-year-old from Grafton died by suicide.

Alexandra’s parents, Dean and Alysia, welcomed me to their home to tell me about their daughter, their grief, their journey to heal, and their hope for others who might be silently struggling. They showed me pictures of Alexandra as a toddler and as a teen, her brown curls a constant over the years. In the 18 months since they lost their daughter they’ve talked to many people -- from national television reporters to local high school students. They are open and public

creative director SHIELA NEALON 508-793-9121 shiela.nealon@telegram.com

ADVERTISING sales manager JEREMY WARDELL 508-767-9574 jwardwell@gatehousemedia.com account executive KATHY PUFFER 508-767-9544 kpuffer@gatehousemedia.com account executive REGINA STILLINGS 508-767-9546 rstillings@gatehousemedia.com

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100 Front Street, 5th Floor Worcester, MA 01608 baystateparent is published monthly and is distributed free of charge throughout Massachusetts.

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with the kind of pain that many keep private because they know it’s a conversation that needs to be had.

In general, suicide rates have been on the rise for two decades -- a staggering 30 percent increase since 1999.

For individuals ages 10 to 24, it’s the second-leading cause of death. Yet it’s still a topic we don’t often talk about.

Let’s change that.

September is Suicide Prevention Month, a time to share resources and stories in an effort to shed light on this taboo and stigmatized topic.

You can read the Valoras’s story, find tips on how to open up a dialogue with your children, and resources for where to turn if you think they need help on page 26.

I am so grateful for Dean and Alysia’s openness and honesty. It’s a topic that is easy to turn away from -- it’s hard to hear about, and even harder to talk about. But as parents, we can approach suicide prevention in the same way we do other safety or health issues for our children. And we should.

Amanda

3 Things We Learned While Making This Issue

We know all about Mother’s Day and Father’s Day, but did you know grandma and grandpa have their own day, too? Grandparent’s Day is Sunday, September 8. Thanks to a federal proclamation, it became an official holiday in 1978. While it never gained a ton of steam as a commercial holiday, it’s still a good excuse to let all the grandparents in your life know how much they mean to you and your little ones!

2.

September ushers in apple season. Here’s some tips if your planning on heading out to pick-your-own: You’ll know the apple is ripe if the stem is easily removed from the spur of the branch.

To properly pick an apple, roll the apple upward off the branch and give a little twist. A list of area PYO orchards is on page 35.

3.

Want your child to eat more fruits and veggies? Tell them why. New research has found that communicating food benefits to children that they can relate to may get them to eat healthier. Kids ear twice as much healthy food when they are told how it benefits them in terms they understand. Read more on page 30.

ON THE COVER • SCIENCE PLUS YOU AT THE ECOTARIUM IN WORCESTER. PHOTO COURTESY ECOTARIUM • DESIGN BY KIMBERLY VASSEUR 6 SEPTEMBER2019

cyber savvy mom

Changing How Girls Experience Social Media Non-profit group wants to revolutionize the messages girls receive and turn sites like Snapchat and Instagram into a place for positive communication.

To try and accomplish this change, MEDIAGIRLS offers a number of educational programs and has been working in schools around the Boston area to spread the message. A multiweek program taught by trained, college-aged mentors teaches girls to learn to think critically about media’s influence on girls The program also asks the kids to define their self-worth, and create empowering content using social media. The group also offers parent workshops and shorter workshops for middle-school girls.

Cove said ultimately it is not about eliminating social media in a girl’s life, but guiding young women to use it in a smart way that enhances their mental state.

“We’re not saying that they should just get off. Period.

Moderation with time is actually a good thing. And we would like to see them use it as a platform to connect and inspire. A place where it feels good to be. I think that is doable.”

BY JOAN GOODCHILD/CYBER SAVVY MOM

S

ocial media is filled with images of beautiful people living amazing lives.

While many of us know much of this content is staged and not very authentic, for young girls who are just starting to navigate it, it can be confusing and even damaging.

Recently on Cyber Savvy Mom, we reported on research that found girls may be more vulnerable than boys to mental health impacts from social media. A study published in the Lancet’s EClinicalMedicine journal finds a connection between depression in teenagers and social media use. It also reveals nearly 40 percent of girls who spent more than five hours a day on apps like Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat and WhatsApp showed signs of depression. That compared with just 14.5 percent of boys But a Massachusetts nonprofit organization is aiming to change that and wants to transform the messages young girls are receiving when they use social media.

MEDIAGIRLS’ mission is to boost the self-worth of girls and young women by teaching them to analyze and reject sexist media messaging, know their true selfworth, and harness the power of media for positive social change.

Founder Michelle Cove, a filmmaker, author, and journalist, said she was first inspired to create the MEDIAGIRLS after her daughter, only age 9 at the time, was struggling with body image concerns.

“She was starting to buckle under the pressure put on girls

today to be pretty enough and thin enough,” said Cove. “She wouldn’t come out of the locker room during swim team practice and thought something was wrong with her body because her thighs touched when she was standing. I realized that media is doing so much damage to girls and this was a response to that. We need to do better.”

Cove is driven by statistics like these, touted on the MEDIAGIRLS site: • The average teen girl spends 8-10 hours consuming media a day.

• 69% of girls ages 11 to 21 feel like they are not good enough.

• 7 in 10 girls are not assertive about their opinion when they do not like the way they look.

It’s no mystery why girls are experiencing heavier impact from social media and higher rates of depression. It’s likely because research also finds girls dominate the social media space. Their presence on sites like Snapchat and Instagram far outnumber young males, and that is why Cove feels that education should be directly focused on girls.

“Girls dominate the space,” said Cove. “They can make this whatever they want this to be.

Do they want to change things?

Admittedly they do. They admit they are addicted to it, but overall it feels terrible.”

What would girls change about what they are seeing and experiencing on social media?

Cove said MEDIAGIRLS does outreach to learn more about what young women want, and it

is consistent: They want to feel good about themselves while using social media.

“They want the space to be more authentic,” she said. “And they want it to be a place where girls lift each other up, instead of tearing each other down. And where girls stand up for what they believe in.”

Got a question or a topic you would like to see covered here?

Reach out at cybersavvymom@ yahoo.com or follow Cybersavvy Mom on Facebook. Read more news and information on staying safe, secure and civil online at cybersavvymom.com

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Herding

Goofballs

The Dragon Master

BY JOSH FARNSWORTH, ILLUSTRATION BY KIRA BEAUDOIN

S

ome would call it destiny. And still others, fate.

Everyone would agree it was a group email.

Cooper’s soccer coaches would be unable to come to the final game of the season, so there was a big need to have someone take their place for the season finale.

A minute and “sent email” later, I would make my coaching debut in a week. The team affectionately known as the Green Dragons would have a new one-game coach.

Coaching a group of four- and fiveyear-olds promised to be a unique challenge. From the sidelines that season, players (from my team and opponents alike) showcased a number of very niche skills for me to consider: • The boy who, after tripping near the net, decided to stay on the ground and crawl into it. I can only imagine it was to explore what a tuna felt like prior to the canning process.

• The girl who walked around not only picking the various flowers that sprouted on the field, but began to take orders from other players, parents and referees for exactly what type of flower she could pick from them. It may well be the beginning of her career as a used car salesperson (“What can I do to put you into this nice yellow dandelion today?”)

• The player who decided to sprint from the sidelines and boot the ball a mile down the field. NOTE: He was actually participating in a game about three fields over, but decided he was advanced enough to try and score for 8 SEPTEMBER2019

three teams at once. Some people are bound by rules. Not him. Not today.

• Snack time is the most rehearsed, plotted, anticipated moment of every week. My boss, whose son played in the league a year prior, told me all snack times were placed at the end of the day, as it was the crowning achievement of participating in a soccer league.

I had big shoes to fill.

Cooper’s regular coaches were incredibly likable among the players and parents alike. A few faces even dropped when they mentioned missing the finale. So I made it my mission to try and impress those children with my coaching skills. I paid careful attention to the many warmup drills the kids enjoyed doing, tried to memorize names the best I could and commit anything deemed cool to memory.

Cool is hard for me. I needed plenty of help.

Since I am wired to think of everything sports, I first started to brainstorm some ideas for how I could make this practice/game (the first half of the hour is practice time, the second half a game) the best thing that ever happened in their young lives.

Wow, did I have ideas. This is the “short” list of thoughts I had preparing for the game…

• Arrive in a suit and tie to reinforce the fact that I was taking this game ultra-serious • Stalk the sidelines like in Gene Hackman’s portrayal of coach Norman Dale from Hoosiers. Perhaps I would use a key drill to unlock their full athletic potential and require each kid to pass

four times before shooting.

• Running through a team banner is a great way to enter the game together. How many of the kids would run through and how many to the sidelines to beg their parents for one last pregame snack?

• Perhaps a pre-game video put together as if it were one of those classic NFL Films pieces that double as a battle cry. You know, the ones narrated by the booming and inspiring voice of John Facenda like the one about the Oakland Raiders…

“The Autumn Wind is a pirate Blustering in from sea, With a rollicking song, he sweeps along, Swaggering boisterously.”

In short, I overthought everything.

So, instead, I acted on the one smart idea bouncing inside my brain: ask a coach.

My dad has coached basketball and track and field, and as a physical education teacher, informally coached about 100 other sports or sports-like activities.

I asked him about any tips coach-tocoach he could give me. I asked as if I was half-serious about wanting sage advice, but I’m pretty sure he saw right through that.

“Have fun. All of you.”

When the kids gathered, we talked.

We ran. We did silly warm-up drills. We played and we finished with snacks.

Yes, did the Green Dragons ever finish with snacks.

The kids slowly warmed up to my presence, not because of all the pomp and circumstance I thought might bring some level of awesomeness to the pitch,

but because we were running side-byside trying to have fun.

We had fun. All of us.

But the real reward for coaching came on the walk back to the car.

I asked Cooper if he had fun. He did.

We talked about playing next season.

“Only if you’re the coach, dad.”

You can take your four passes Coach Dale and go home. I unlocked whatever it is that mattered to me.

To all youth coaches out there who commit yourselves to giving kids these opportunities, thank you. If you’ve never coached before, volunteer. Try it.

I stalked the sidelines for a single hour and saw just how rewarding it can be.

I did it without having to get crazy with ideas. And it’s too bad for that, my battle cry was going to be epic.

Since it would be a waste to bury the song forever, here you go Green Dragons, a tribute to you for allowing me a coaching debut…

“The springtime is a Green Dragon Stopping opponents in their tracks.

Fun was had by Cooper’s dad More than any post-game snacks.”

Josh Farnsworth is a husband, father of goofballs Cooper and Milo, goofball himself, and award-winning writer and columnist living in Worcester.

He can be reached for column ideas at josh.farnsworth@ yahoo.com.

on the

agenda • FACTS & FREEBIES • SEPTEMBER’S ADVENTURES • THE LIST

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on the

agenda

facts and freebies tuesday

monday

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wednesday

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thurs

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Don’t feel guilty for ordering take-out tonight. It’s National Cheese Pizza Day, after all!

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10 {FREEBIE}

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It’s SpongeBob, on stage! The SpongeBob Musical is coming to the Boch Center next month, and we’re giving away tickets! Here’s the chance to see SpongeBob and all the residents of Bikini Bottom!

Mamas-to-be, hope you’re ready! According to statistics, more babies are born today than any other day of the year!

Happy first day of fall! Autumn is America’s favorite season, with 29% of people saying it’s their top pick.

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Blast from the past: the animated series Ducktales premiered on this day in 1987.

{FREEBIE}

Perfect for kids who love to draw, the smART Sketcher Projector injects fun into drawing, coloring and writing with a simple-to-use app. Step-bystep directions guide little hands through the whole process of drawing their chosen picture.

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Starting on the date the prize appears, go to our page to enter for your chance to win.

sday

friday

6 {FREEBIE}

There is special bond between grandchildren and their grandparents. Celebrate the amazing grandparents in your life with the sweet new picture books “The Truth About Grandparents” and “My Grandma and Me.” Perfect for Grandparent’s Day, which is on Sunday.

13 {FACT} It’s Kids Take Over the Kitchen Day! Kids and teens are called to take over their kitchens and make a meal for their family today!

20 {FACT} Happy Birthday Johnny Appleseed! Did you know this American folk hero was born in Leominster?

27 {FREEBIE}

Every parent needs a little “me time.”

We’re giving away a Buddha Board so you can take few minutes to relax.

Inspired by the Zen idea of living in the moment, you ‘paint’ on the surface with water, then, as it evaporates, your art will magically disappear leaving you with a clean slate.

BAYSTATEPARENT 11

on the

agenda

september

ADVENTURES OUR TOP

5 PICKS

OF THINGS TO DO IN SEPTEMBER

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Harvest Craft Fair. Brookfield Orchards, 12 Lincoln Rd., North Brookfield. Saturday & Sunday, Sept. 7-8, 8 a.m.-5 p.m. Craft vendors, artisans, local farmers and lots of scratchbaked goodies. Take a wagon ride into the orchard to pick your own apples, enjoy live music, and craft beers and local wine.

Free. brookfieldorchardsonline.com.

Catapult: Mouzart & Magic Shadows. The Hanover Theatre, 2 Southbridge St., Worcester. Friday, Sept. 20, 8 p.m. The magic of shadow illusion brings to life the story of three prodigies, including a very musical mouse, through a funny, compelling, and thoroughly delightful story. $22-28. thehanovertheatre.org.

29th Annual KidsFest. Wachusett Mountain, 499 Mountain Rd., Princeton. Saturday & Sunday, Sept. 21-22, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Enjoy a day of family fun featuring music, magic, juggling, mini golf, a giant slide, petting zoo, vendors, and more.

Adults $10-13, children 6 to 12 $8-11, ages 5 and under free. wachusett.com.

What the Fluff. Union Square, Somerville Ave., Somerville.

Saturday, Sept. 21 3-7 p.m. A celebration of 102nd anniversary of the invention of fluff, with fluff-themed games, activities, antics, musical performances, and fun for every age. Free. Rain Date: Sept. 22. fluffestival.com.

Take a Child Outside Week. Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton. Tuesday through Thursday, Sept. 24-26. Search for and collect outdoor treasures, learn about weather or play with bubbles during this three-day event celebrating the outdoors.

Free with admission. Members free; nonmembers $14.50, ages under 1 free. discoveryacton.org.

ADVENTURES 1 SUNDAY Spencer Fair. Fairgrounds, 48 Smithville Road, Spencer. 8 a.m.-11 p.m. Midway with rides and games, livestock shows, classic fair foods and fun. Adults $12, kids $7, children 6 and under free. spencerfair.org.

Free First Sunday at WAM. Worcester Art Museum, 55 Salisbury St., Worcester.

10 a.m.-4 p.m. Tour the galleries, see some amazing art, and enjoy our Museum for free.

Free. worcesterart.org.

Appleseed Country Fair. Red Apple Farm, 455 Highland Ave., Phillipston. 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Classic country fair with hayrides, music, crafts, tractor pulls, fields of sunflowers and hot air balloons. $10 per car. appleseedcountryfair.com.

Three County Fair. Three County Fair, 54 Fair St., Northampton. 10 a.m.-11 p.m.

Experience carnival rides and games, live musical performances, delicious food, animal and livestock viewing, interactions and competition, and more. Advance $10.50, day-of $2, ages 11 and under free. 3countyfair.com.

Crazy Creatures. Boston Children’s Museum, 308 Congress St., Boston. 11 a.m.-2 p.m.

Drawn an animal you know or invent your own creature as we connect with our wild sides and explore ‘Crazy Creatures’ through drawing.

Free with admission. Members free; nonmember adults $18, youths 1-15 $18, ages under 1 free. bostonchildrensmuseum.org.

First Sunday. Museum of Russian Icons, 203 Union St., Clinton. 11 a.m.-5 p.m. Explore the galleries, take a look at our exhibition ‘Wrestling with Angels,’ and create an angel-inspired craft. Free. museumofrussianicons.org.

2 MONDAY Spencer Fair. Fairgrounds, 48 Smithville Road, Spencer. 8 a.m.-9 p.m. Midway with rides and games, livestock shows, classic fair foods and fun. Adults $12, kids $7, children 6 and under free. spencerfair.org.

Old Home Day. Town Common, Main St., Charlton. 7 a.m.-4 p.m. Craft fair, art show, kids’ games, live entertainment, food and more. Free. townofchalrton.net.

Three County Fair. Three County Fair, 54 Fair St., Northampton. 10 a.m. Experience carnival rides and games, live musical performances, delicious food, animal and livestock viewing, interactions and competition, and more. Advance $10.50, day-of $12, ages 11 and under free. 3countyfair.com.

Appleseed Country Fair. Red Apple Farm, 455 Highland Ave., Phillipston. 10 a.m.-4 p.m.

Classic country fair with hayrides, music, crafts, tractor pulls, fields of sunflowers and hot air balloons. $10 per car. appleseedcountryfair.com.

on the

agenda

september

Labor Day: Free Admission. Institute of Contemporary Art: Boston, 25 Harbor Shore Dr., Boston. 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Celebrate Labor Day with some art viewing and exploration in the galleries, a seat looking at the Boston Harbor or trip on the ICA Water Shuttle. Free. icaboston.org.

Jaws. Coolidge Corner Theatre, 290 Harvard St., Brookline. 7 p.m. Close out Summer with a viewing of this 1975 blockbuster following the good people of Amity Island as a Great White Shark begins preying off beachgoers.

Adults $13.25, children $11.25. coolidge.org.

3 TUESDAY Dance Me a Story. Newton Free Library, 330 Homer St., Newton. 10-10:45 a.m. Join the Joanne Langione Dance Center for this fun family event where music, movement, and literature align. Free. newtonfreelibrary.net.

Paint by Sticker Crafternoons: Unicorns & Magic. Worcester Public Library: Burncoat Branch, 526 Burncoat St.; Goddard Branch, 14 Richards St.; Roosevelt Branch, 1006 Grafton St.; Tatnuck Branch, 1083 Pleasant St., Worcester. 4-5 p.m. Create a beautiful and magical mosaic picture using numbered, puzzle-style stickers. For ages 6 and up. Free. mywpl.org.

Folk Open Mic: Ron Israel. TCAN: Center for Arts, 14 Summer St., Natick. 8 p.m. Enjoy the area’s most vibrant folk and acoustic music, and spoken-word community around, featuring a performance by musician Ron Israel. Members free; nonmembers $5. natickarts.org.

4 WEDNESDAY WAM Artful Play. Worcester Art Museum, 55 Salisbury St., Worcester. 10:30-11:15 a.m. Enjoy a special tour, story in the galleries, hands-on activity, and post-tour snacks. Designed for ages 0 to 5 and their families. Free with admission. Members free; nonmember adults $16, youths 4 and up $6, ages 3 and under free. worcesterart.org.

5 THURSDAY Storytime Adventures. Newton Free Library, 330 Homer St., Newton. 4-4:30 p.m. Enjoy this special story-time focusing on the themes of school and fall. For ages 3 to 5.

Free. newtonfreelibrary.net.

6 FRIDAY Sterling Fair. Fairgrounds, 121 Greenland Road, Sterling. 5-11 p.m. Rides, horse and oxen pulls, food and classic family fun. Free. sterlingfair.org.

Peppa Pig Live: Peppa Pig’s Adventure.

The Hanover Theatre, 2 Southbridge St.,

Peppa Pig Live. Hanover Theatre, Worcester.

Worcester. 6 p.m. Come join Peppa on an exciting camping trip to the woods with George and her school friends, including Pedro Pony, Suzy Sheep, and Gerald Giraffe. $35.50-70. thehanovertheatre.org.

Stars Over Springfield. Springfield Museums, 21 Edwards St., Springfield. 7:30-9:30 p.m. Join members of the Springfield Stars Club for skygazing in the Science Museum’s observatory or a planetarium show. $3.

Springfieldmuseums.org.

7 SATURDAY Sterling Fair. Fairgrounds, 121 Greenland Road, Sterling. 9 a.m.-11 p.m. Rides, horse and oxen pulls, food and classic family fun.

Free. sterlingfair.org.

Gibbon Birthday Party. Stone Zoo, 149 Pond St., Stoneham. 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Kien the white-cheeked gibbon who calls the Stone Zoo home is turning 18, so come celebrate with arts and crafts, sign a giant birthday card, and maybe have a slice of cake. Free with admission. Members free; nonmember adults $19.95, youths 2-12 $12.95, ages under 2 free. zoonewengland.org.

Celebrate the Apple: Family Open House. Concord Museum, 53 Cambridge Turnpike, Concord. 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Participate in hands-on programming from pressing cider to baking pies, building a community art mural, and more. Free. concordmuseum.org.

Dr. Seuss’s The Horse Museum Release Party. Springfield Museums, 21 Edwards St., Springfield. 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Come one, come all, celebrate the new Dr. Seuss book ‘The Horse Museum’ with a day filled with

activities including drawing, scavenger hunts, and character sightings. Free with admission.

Adults $25, youths $13, ages under 3 free. springfieldmuseums.org.

WAM Family Tour. Worcester Art Museum, 55 Salisbury St., Worcester. 10:30-11:30 a.m. Explore the museum galleries with your family on a docent-guided discovery tour filled with fun facts, stories, and time together. Free with admission. Members free; nonmember adults $16, youths 4 and up $6, ages 3 and under free. worcesterart.org.

Beyond the Spectrum. Museum of Fine Arts: Boston, 465 Huntington Ave., Boston.

10:30 a.m.-12 p.m. Enjoy a gallery tour led by experienced instructors, followed by a creative art-making workshop during this artful adventure for children with Autism Spectrum Disorders. For ages 8 to 12. $9. mfa.org.

MISTER G Performs Live. The Eric Carle Museum of Picture Book Art, 125 West Bay Road, Amherst. 10:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m.

Join Latin Grammy Award-winning artist and educator, as he brings his international sounds to The Carle. Members $9, nonmembers $10.

Carlemuseum.org.

Worcester Pride Festival. Front St., Worcester. 11 a.m.-5 p.m. A family-friendly event with live music and entertainment, kids’ play area, food trucks and more. Free. worcesterpride.org.

Boston Arts Festival. Christopher Columbus Waterfront Park, Atlantic Ave., Boston. 11 a.m.-6 p.m. Meet artists and craftspeople, view performing and visual arts, and explore the best of Boston’s paintings, ceramics, jewelry, sculptures, and more. Free. thebostonartsfestival.com.

Zumba Kids. Boston Children’s Museum, 308 Congress St., Boston. 11 a.m. & 11:30 a.m.

Get moving during this exercise and fitness class for kids and caregivers alike, as we dance to cumbia, salsa, merengue, and tango beats.

Free with admission. Members free; nonmember adults $18, youths 1-15 $18, ages under 1 free. bostonchildrensmuseum.org.

8 SUNDAY Sterling Fair. Fairgrounds, 121 Greenland Road, Sterling. 9 a.m.-5 p.m. Rides, horse and oxen pulls, food and classic family fun.

Free. sterlingfair.org.

Yoga in the Park. deCordova Sculpture Park & Museum, 51 Sandy Pond Road, Lincoln.

10:30-11 a.m. Get moving as a family and enjoy a teacher led kid-friendly yoga session in the Sculpture Park. For ages 3 to 12 with caregiver. Member children free; nonmember children $5. deCordova.org.

Somerville Dog Festival. Trum Field, 541 Broadway, Somerville. 11 a.m.-3 p.m.

Play Games, have fun, and feed pets, as we enjoy a day filled with dog agility runs, food trucks, pet-owner activities, and more. Free. somdogfest.org.

39th Victorian Fair. Downtown Melrose, Main St., Melrose. 11 a.m.-4 p.m. Enjoy entertainment, performances, food, local products, martial arts, singers, dancers, music, and more, during this celebration of community.

Free. melrosechamber.org.

Boston Arts Festival. Christopher Columbus Waterfront Park, Atlantic Ave., Boston. 11 a.m.-6 p.m. Meet artists and craftspeople, view performing and visual arts, and explore the best of Boston’s paintings, ceramics, jewelry, BAYSTATEPARENT 13

sculptures, and more. Free. thebostonartsfestival.com.

Book Party. The Eric Carle Museum of Picture Book Art, 125 West Bay Road, Amherst. 1 p.m. Get ready to get reading with Hi Jack! and Jake Blasts Off! Delight in create-your-own adventures and engage with early reading. Free with admission.

Adults $9, youths $6, ages under 1 free. carlemuseum.org.

Toe Tapping Snappy Hot Jazz. Newton

Free Library, 330 Homer St., Newton.

2-3 p.m. Enjoy as 440 Gypsy Jazz performs irresistible toe-tapping swing and hot gypsy jazz standards and originals. Free. newtonfreelibrary.net.

struments, and dance during an interactive class.

Recommended for ages 5 and under. Register ahead. Free. leominsterlibrary.org.

9 MONDAY

Looking Closely: A Caterpillar Was Here. Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton. 10-11 a.m. Use magnifying glasses and other tools to take a close look at some of the fascinating features of caterpillars. Free with admission. Members free; nonmembers $14.50,

Kiddie Music Time. Leominster Public Library, 30 West St., Leominster. 10-11 a.m.

Join the Monument Square Community Music School to explore original music, percussion in-

10 TUESDAY

ages under 1 free. discoveryacton.org.

11 WEDNESDAY Music and Movement. Boston Children’s Museum, 308 Congress St., Boston. 10:3011:15 a.m. Sing along to music that gets all ages moving. Enjoy live music and interact through sound, sight, and touch. Free with admission. Members free; nonmember adults $18, youths 1-15 $18, ages under 1 free. bostonchildrensmuseum.org.

12 THURSDAY Take Aparts, Jr. Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton. 10-11 a.m. Drop-in and discover the inner workings of household gadgets and gizmos. Free with admission.

Members free; nonmembers $14.50, ages under 1 free. discoveryacton.org.

Wee Ones Storytime and At Class.

Leominster Public Library, 30 West St., Leominster. 10 a.m.-11 p.m. Learn to paint a llama using acrylic paints on a wood canvas during this art educator-led class. For ages 3 to 5. Register ahead. Free. leominsterlibrary.org.

Take Aparts. Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton. 2-4:30 p.m. Grab a screwdriver and discover resistors, capacitors, and circuit boards within everyday electronics. Free with admission. Members free; nonmembers $14.50, ages under 1 free. discoveryacton.org.

Moon Festival Celebration. The Eric Carle Museum of Picture Book Art, 125 West Zumba Kids. Boston Children’s Museum.

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Bay Road, Amherst. 6-8 p.m. Join author/ artist Grace Lin and author Heidi Stemple in celebrating the Mid-Autumn Moon Festival with art projects, stories, and moon cookies. Free with admission. Adults $9, youths $6, ages under 1 free. carlemuseum.org.

13 FRIDAY Backyard and Beyond: Forest Fridays.

Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton. 1010:45 a.m. Enjoy a nature-based activity and a nature walk either in the Discovery Woods or out on the adjacent conservation land. Recommended for ages 2 to 6. Free with admission.

Members free; nonmembers $14.50, ages under 1 free. discoveryacton.org.

Backyard and Beyond: International Rock Flipping Day. Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton. 2-3 p.m. Walk through the conservation land to flip some rocks and explore the tiny and mysterious worlds underneath. Free with admission. Members free; nonmembers $14.50, ages under 1 free. discoveryacton.org.

Family Fun. Newton Free Library, 330 Homer St., Newton. 3-4:30 p.m. Families are invited for this space of quality time, featuring games, building, materials, and other activities for all ages. Free. newtonfreelibrary.net.

14 SATURDAY South Boston Street Festival. East Broadway between I & L St., South Boston. 11 a.m.-4 p.m. Join South Boston for our vibrant festival

featuring entertainment, food, vendors, and more, during this celebration of family and community. Free. southbostonstreetfestival.com.

Build a Bug. Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton. 2-4:30 p.m. Come create and use repurposed and recycled materials to imagine and build your very own 6-legged friend. Free with admission. Members free; nonmembers $14.50, ages under 1 free. discoveryacton.org.

The Lion King. Newton Free Library, 330 Homer St., Newton. 2 p.m. Sit back and enjoy this modern Disney animated classic following a young lion cub as he takes his place atop Pride Rock. Free. newtonfreelibrary.net.

2nd Annual New York Cat Film Festival. The Regent Theatre, 7 Medford St., Arlington. 7 p.m. An annual celebration of cats who share our lives, through short films from around the world meant to inspire, educate, and entertain, benefiting local animal welfare groups. $12. regenttheatre.com.

15 SUNDAY International Dot Day. Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton. 11 a.m.-2 p.m. Celebrate creativity, courage, and collaboration, as we explore different techniques to make our own dot artwork. Free with admission. Members free; nonmembers $14.50, ages under 1 free. discoveryacton. org.

Catapult: Mouzart & Magic Shadows.

The Hanover Theatre, 2 Southbridge St., Worcester. 8 p.m. The magic of shadow illusion brings to life the story of three prodigies, including a very musical mouse, through a funny, compelling, and thoroughly delightful story. $22-28. thehanovertheatre.org.

stART on the Street. Park Ave., Worcester. 11 a.m.-6 p.m. Central Massachusetts’ largest arts, music and performance festival featuring artists, crafters, food vendors, and family fun. Free. startonthestreet.org.

Hispanic Heritage Month: Papel Picado.

Boston Children’s Museum, 308 Congress St., Boston. 1-3 p.m. Make ‘papel picado’ or ‘pierced paper,’ a Mexican artform in which artists create patterns and images in colored tissue paper using chisel and small hammer.

Free with admission. Members free; nonmember adults $18, youths 1-15 $18, ages under 1 free. bostonchildrensmuseum.org.

Sunday Concert. Newton Free Library, 330 Homer St., Newton. 2 p.m. Join the New England Philharmonic Chamber Players for an afternoon concert. Free. newtonfreelibrary.net.

Boston Area Chantey & Maritime Sing.

USS Constitution Museum, Charlestown Navy Yard, Charlestown. 2-5 p.m. Listen, learn, and lift your voices as you participate in your maritime heritage by joining a rousing chorus of sea chanteys. Recommended donation: children $5-10; families $25-45. usscm.org.

16 MONDAY Bill Martin Jr. Celebration. Leominster Public Library, 30 West St., Leominster.

10-10:45 a.m. Celebrate the works of ‘Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See?’ author Bill Martin Jr. through stories, art, music, and movement. For ages 2 to 5. Register ahead.

Free. leominsterlibrary.org.

Baby Bookworms. Leominster Public Library, 30 West St., Leominster. 11-11:30 a.m. Interact with nursery rhymes, action rhymes, songs, and stories during this special time for connection between caregivers and their babies. For ages up to 12 months. Register ahead. Free. leominsterlibrary.org.

17 TUESDAY LittleBeats Dance. Newton Free Library, 330 Homer St., Newton. 10-10:30 a.m. Join friends from LittleBeats for creative dance featuring music and stories to stimulate our busy brains and bodies. For ages 0 to 4. Free. newtonfreelibrary.net.

21 SATURDAY Somerville Dog Festival. Trum Field, Somerville.

Preschool Storytime. Leominster Public Library, 30 West St., Leominster. 10-10:30 a.m. Enjoy stories, music, and motion for young patrons. For ages 3 to 5. Free. leominsterlibrary.org.

Mirror, Mirror, What Do You See? Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton. 1011 a.m. Play with different kinds of reflections and experiment by using mirrors to create symmetry, refract light, and expand your field of vision. Free with admission. Members free; nonmembers $14.50, ages under 1 free. discoveryacton.org.

Folk Open Mic: Don White. TCAN: Center for Arts, 14 Summer St., Natick. 8 p.m. Enjoy the area’s most vibrant folk and acoustic music, and spoken-word community around, featuring a performance by musician Don White.

Members free; nonmembers $5. natickarts.org.

18 WEDNESDAY Terrific Twos Storytime. Leominster Public Library, 30 West St., Leominster. 10-10:45 a.m. Join us for stories, music, and fun for children and caregivers. For children age 2.

Free. leominsterlibrary.org.

WAM Artful Play. Worcester Art Museum, 55 Salisbury St., Worcester. 10:30-11:15 a.m. Enjoy a special tour, story in the galleries, hands-on activity, and post-tour snacks. Designed for ages 0 to 5 and their families. Free with admission. Members free; nonmember adults $16, youths 4 and up $6, ages 3 and under free. worcesterart.org.

Backyard and Beyond: Stargazing.

Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton.

11 a.m.-12 p.m. Bring the night sky indoors and learn a little bit about the constellations and get some tricks you can use at home for

spotting stars when the sun goes down. Free with admission. Members free; nonmembers $14.50, ages under 1 free. discoveryacton.org.

Latinx Heritage Night. Museum of Fine Arts: Boston, 465 Huntington Ave., Boston.

5-10 p.m. Join us for our first evening celebrating Latinx heritage and culture, featuring live music, dance performances, works from local artists, and more. Free. mfa.org.

19 THURSDAY Doggy Days: Taking Care of Abby.

Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton. 1011 a.m. Join kid-favorite therapy dog, Abby, and learn about all the ways to take care of pets and keep them happy and healthy. Free with admission. Members free; nonmembers $14.50, ages under 1 free. discoveryacton.org.

Bunny’s Storytime. Leominster Public Library, 30 West St., Leominster. 10-11 a.m.

Meet Daisy the Puppet, sing songs, listen to a story or two, and play a musical instrument.

For ages 12 to 24 months. Register ahead.

Free. leominsterlibrary.org.

Little Yogis & Me Yoga and Movement. Leominster Public Library, 30 West St., Leominster. 10-11 a.m. & 11 a.m.-12 p.m. A fun-filled yoga play for active tots and preschoolers, featuring poses, songs, and movements embracing expression and creativity. For ages 1 to 4 with caregivers. Register ahead. Free. leominsterlibrary.org.

Word Play with Center Dance Studio.

The Eric Carle Museum of Picture Book Art, 125 West Bay Road, Amherst. 10:30-11:30 a.m. Creative movement and narrative dance inspired by our favorite picture books and imagination. For ages 3 and up. Register ahead. Free with admission. Adults $9, youths

$6, ages under 1 free. carlemuseum.org.

Everyday Engineering: Sinking Ships. Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton. 2-4:30 p.m. Celebrate Talk Like a Pirate Day and take part in seaworthy science. Create and load up tinfoil boats with pennies. Free with admission.

Members free; nonmembers $14.50, ages under 1 free. discoveryacton.org.

Animal World Experience. Worcester Public Library: Francis Perkins Branch, 470 West Boylston St., Worcester. 4-6 p.m. Learn interesting facts about animals and stay for a petting experience as we encounter a variety of animals from around the world. Free. mywpl.org.

20 FRIDAY Music and Movement with Miss Bernadette. Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton. 9:30-10 a.m. Explore sound through singing and playing, as we move, make music, listen, learn, and get a multi-sensory workout. Free with admission. Members free; nonmembers $14.50, ages under 1 free. discoveryacton.org.

Backyard and Beyond: Forest Fridays.

Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton. 1010:45 a.m. Enjoy a nature-based activity and a nature walk either in the Discovery Woods or out on the adjacent conservation land. Recommended for ages 2 to 6. Free with admission.

Members free; nonmembers $14.50, ages under 1 free. discoveryacton.org.

Uno, Dos, Tres: Bilingual Storytime.

Leominster Public Library, 30 West St., Leominster. 10-11 a.m. Speakers of all languages are welcome to read and rhyme in English and Spanish during this bilingual story-time covering basic concepts like counting and color. For ages 5 and under. Register ahead. Free. leominsterlibrary.org.

Museum Day. USS Constitution Museum, Charlestown Navy Yard, Charlestown. 9 a.m-6 p.m. Celebrate boundless curiosity and join over 1,000 museum and cultural institutions in opening our doors for exploration and learning. Free with downloaded ticket. usscm.org.

Makers’ Weekend. Old Sturbridge Village, 1 Old Sturbridge Village Road, Sturbridge. 9:30 a.m.-4 p.m. Celebrate artisans and see a showcase of New England trades from the 19th century, featuring blacksmiths, potters, tinners, printers, and more. Free with admission. Adults $28, youths 4-17 $14, ages 3 and under free. osv.org.

Red Panda Day. Franklin Park Zoo, 1 Franklin Park Road, Boston. 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Celebrate International Red Panda Day and learn about the species during special zookeeper chats, meet author Gemmesa Johnson and listen to a reading of her book, and discover how you can save red pandas yourself. Free with admission.

Members free; nonmember adults $21.95, youths 2-12 $14.95, ages under 2 free. zoonewengland.org.

The Carle Celebrates Museum Day Live.

The Eric Carle Museum with Picture Book Art, 125 West Bay Road, Amherst. 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Celebrate this nationwide event hosted

by Smithsonian Magazine as we open our doors to all. Download ticket ahead. Free. carlemuseum.org.

Southbridge AutumnFest. Town Common, Optical Drive, Southbridge. 10 a.m.-5 p.m.

Farmer’s market, kids’ games and rides, clowns, salsa dancing, craft beers and local wines. Free.

Apple Fest. Cooks Farm Orchard, 106 Haynes Hill Road, Brimfield. 10 a.m.-6 p.m.

Apple picking, live music, tractor rides into the orchard, hay bale maze, face-painting, baked goods and BT’s Food Truck. Free. cooksfarmorchard.com.

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MFA Playdates: Shapes All Around Me. Museum of Fine Arts: Boston, 465 Huntington Ave., Boston. 10:15-11 a.m. Enjoy story time, looking activities in the galleries and artmaking inspired by the works with visit.

Recommended for ages 4 and under. Free with admission. Members free; nonmember adults $25, youths 7 and up $10, children 6 and under free. mfa.org.

WAM Artful Play. Worcester Art Museum, 55 Salisbury St., Worcester. 10:30-11:15 a.m. Enjoy a special tour, story in the galleries, hands-on activity, and post-tour snacks. Designed for ages 0 to 5 and their families. Free with admission. Members free; nonmember adults $16, youths 4 and up $6, ages 3 and under free. worcesterart.org.

Everyday Engineering: Float and Fly. Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton. 11 a.m.-2 p.m. Craft some simple contraptions that harness the power of air to float and glide from parachutes to whirligigs to hoop gliders. Free with admission. Members free; nonmembers $14.50, ages under 1 free. discoveryacton.org.

Wall and Bridges. The Eric Carle Museum of Picture Book Art, 125 West Bay Road, Amherst. 1 p.m. Join Peter Sis as he shares stories of his Czech childhood and his love of picture books. Free with Museum Day ticket. carlemuseum.org.

New York Dog Film Festival: Program 1. The Regent Theatre, 7 Medford St., Arlington. 1 p.m. & 7 p.m. Celebrate the love between dogs and their people, through short films from funny narratives at the dog park to a cross-country road trip between dog and owner. $12. regenttheatre.com.

New York Dog Film Festival: Program 2. The Regent Theatre, 7 Medford St., Arlington. 2:30 p.m. & 8:30 p.m. Celebrate the love between dogs and their people, through short films from an animated story with an unexpected ending to a documentary following glorious canine athletes. $12. regenttheatre.com.

Happier Family Comedy Show. The Eric Carle Museum of Picture Book Art, 125 West Bay Road, Amherst. 3-4 p.m. Join in

Backyard and Beyond. International Rock Flipping Day. Discovery Museum, Acton. during this created on-the-spot improv show set to entertain the entire family powered through comedy and imagination. Nonmember adults $10, youths $5; member adults $9, youths $4.50. carlemuseum.org.

22 SUNDAY Rock & Walk for Babies. Nashoba Regional High School, 12 Green Road, Bolton. 9 a.m.-1 p.m. Hosted by the Massachusetts TEARS Foundation, this event raises funds for the newly opened Center for Child Loss and resource programs to benefit local families who have experienced pregnancy, infant or child loss. Attendees rock in chairs and walk laps together, honoring children whose names appear on butterflies lining the path.

Registration $10. give.thetearsfoundation. org/massachusetts2019.

Makers’ Weekend. Old Sturbridge Village, 1 Old Sturbridge Village Road, Sturbridge.

9:30 a.m.-4 p.m. Celebrate artisans and see a showcase of New England trades from the 19th century, featuring blacksmiths, potters, tinners, printers, and more. Free with admission. Adults $28, youths 4-17 $14, ages 3 and under free. osv.org.

Apple Fest. Cooks Farm Orchard, 106 Haynes Hill Road, Brimfield. 10 a.m.-6 p.m. Apple picking, live music, tractor rides into the orchard, hay bale maze, face-painting, baked goods and BT’s Food Truck. Free. cooksfarmorchard.com.

Special Sundays in the Studio. The Eric Carle Museum of Picture Book Art, 125 West Bay Road, Amherst. Join us in the 16 SEPTEMBER2019

Art Studio to explore new materials and try a different project. Free with admission.

Adults $9, youths $6, ages under 1 free. carlemuseum.org.

2nd Annual New York Cat Film Festival. The Regent Theatre, 7 Medford St., Arlington. 1 p.m. An annual celebration of cats who share our lives, through short films from around the world meant to inspire, educate, and entertain, benefiting local animal welfare groups. $12. regenttheatre.com.

Sunday Concert. Newton Free Library, 330 Homer St., Newton. 2 p.m. Join Alex Thomas for an afternoon concert on the piano. Free. newtonfreelibrary.net.

23 MONDAY Wee Ones Art Class: Paint a Village.

Leominster Public Library, 30 West St., Leominster. 10-11 a.m. Paint a mini three building village from a favorite story or your imagination with this arts educator-led program. For ages 3 to 5. Register ahead.

Free. leominsterlibrary.org.

24 TUESDAY Preschool Storytime. Leominster Public Library, 30 West St., Leominster. 10-10:30 a.m. Enjoy stories, music, and motion for our young patrons. For ages 3 to 5. Free. leominsterlibrary.org.

Matt Heaton Family Singalong. Newton Free Library, 330 Homer St., Newton. 1010:45 a.m. Join the Toddlerbilly Troubadour

as he brings infectious energy to his singalongs featuring new and classic songs on guitar and banjo. Free. newtonfreelibrary.net.

Take a Child Outside Week: Nature Textures. Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton. 10-11 a.m. Explore the Discovery Woods, search for and collect natural items with different textures to create a nature rubbing of your found treasures. Free with admission.

Members free; nonmembers $14.50, ages under 1 free. discoveryacton.org.

String Department Faculty Concert.

Oliver Colvin Recital Hall, 1140 Boylston St., Boston. 6:30 p.m. Berklee College’s String Department presents this eclectic array of ensembles performing original pieces and exciting arrangements. Free. berklee.edu/ events.

Little Lab Coats. Newton Free Library, 330 Homer St., Newton. 6:30-7:30 p.m. Go on a scientific journey to explore the basic properties of science in an easy and fun way.

For ages 6 to 9. Free. newtonfreelibrary.net.

25 WEDNESDAY Terrific Twos Storytime. Leominster Public Library, 30 West St., Leominster. 10-10:45 a.m. Join us for stories, music, and fun for children and a caregiver. For children age 2.

Free. leominsterlibrary.org.

Take a Child Outside Week: What’s the Weather Wednesday. Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton. 10-11 a.m.

Drop into the Discovery Woods to celebrate whatever weather Mother Nature decides to

contest, yummy food and lots more. Free.

Family Yoga Class. Newton Free Library, 330 Homer St., Newton. 10:30-11:30 a.m.

Enjoy cooperative games, age-appropriate poses, partner poses between caregiver and child, breathing exercises, and mindfulness activities. For ages 3 to 12. Free. newtonfreelibrary.net.

Take a Child Outside Week: Nature Impressions. Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton. 11 a.m.-2 p.m. Explore Discovery Woods to look for natural patterns, and preserve these findings by making a clay impression. Free with admission. Members free; nonmembers $14.50, ages under 1 free. discoveryacton.org.

BBQ Fest. Wachusett Mountain, 499 Mountain Road, Princeton. 11 a.m.-5 p.m. Enjoy live music, a craft fair and farmers’ market, contests, cooking demos, and the best BBQ vendors in the area. Adults $9, youths 6 to 12 $4, ages under 5 free. wachusett.com.

The Secret Life of Pets 2. Newton Free Library, 330 Homer St., Newton. 2 p.m. Find

out what happens on when pets are alone at home during this animated adventure for the entire family. Free. newtonfreelibrary.net.

Special Storytime: Breanna J. McDaniel.

The Eric Carle Museum of Picture Book Art, 125 West Bay Road, Amherst. 2 p.m. Join author and scholar Breanna McDaniel as she reads Hands Up! her triumphant debut picture featuring opportunities to move, sing, dance, and query. Free with admission. Adults $9, youths $6, ages under 1 free. carlemuseum.org.

Beautiful: The Carole King Musical. The Hanover Theatre, 2 Southbridge St., Worcester. 2 p.m. & 8 p.m. Experience the true story of Carole King’s rise as a hit songwriter to becoming one of the most successful solo acts in popular music history. $39-88. thehanovertheatre.org.

Bilingual Storytime: Spanish. Newton Free Library, 330 Homer St., Newton. Enjoy a special bilingual story-time featuring stories, songs, and movement in English and Spanish.

For ages 3 to 5. Free. newtonfreelibrary.net.

Especially for Me: Free Autism-Friendly Eve-

Apple Fest. Cooks Farm Orchard, Brimfield. give us. Free with admission. Members free; nonmembers $14.50, ages under 1 free. discoveryacton.org.

Family Fun Night: Full STEAM Ahead.

Leominster Public Library, 30 West St., Leominster. 6-7 p.m. Learn about spiders through stories, explore spider slime, identify parts of a spider, play games, and make a craft. For ages 3 to 7. Register ahead. Free. leominsterlibrary.org.

26 THURSDAY Take a Child Outside Week: Wacky Bubbles. Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton.

10-11 a.m. Play and experiment with bubbles of different shapes and sizes, ask if a bubble can be flat, a cube, or even a snake. Free with admission. Members free; nonmembers $14.50, ages under 1 free. discoveryacton.org.

Bunny’s Storytime. Leominster Public Library, 30 West St., Leominster. 10-11 a.m.

Meet Daisy the Puppet, sing songs, listen to a story or two, and play a musical instrument.

For ages 12 to 24 months. Register ahead.

Free. leominsterlibrary.org.

Sylvester’s Magic Pebble Picnic. The Eric Carle Museum of Picture Book Art, 125 West Bay Road, Amherst. 6-8 p.m. Pack a snack and a blanket and join for an evening in Bobbie’s Meadow to enjoy a sunset screening of ‘Sylvester and the Magic Pebble’. Free with admission. Adults $9, youths $6, ages under 1 free. carlemuseum.org.

Backyard and Beyond: Nature Journaling. Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton. 2-3 p.m. Explore the natural world through science, art, and writing. <ake nature journals and take them out to search for signs of Fall. Free with admission. Members free; nonmembers $14.50, ages under 1 free. discoveryacton.org.

Beautiful: The Carole King Musical.

The Hanover Theatre, 2 Southbridge St., Worcester. 7:30 p.m. Experience the true story of Carole King’s rise as a hit songwriter to becoming one of the most successful solo acts in popular music history. $39-88. thehanovertheatre.org.

KidsJam. Boston Children’s Museum, 308 Congress St., Boston. 6:30-8 p.m. A monthly family dance party featuring dance lessons, games, and a live DJ. $1. bostonchildrensmuseum.org.

27 FRIDAY Backyard and Beyond: Forest Fridays.

Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton. 1010:45 a.m. Enjoy a nature-based activity and a nature walk either in the Discovery Woods or out on the adjacent conservation land. Recommended for ages 2 to 6. Free with admission.

Members free; nonmembers $14.50, ages under 1 free. discoveryacton.org.

Beautiful: The Carole King Musical. The Hanover Theatre, 2 Southbridge St., Worcester. 8 p.m. Experience the true story of Carole King’s rise as a hit songwriter to becoming one of the most successful solo acts in popular music history. $39-88. thehanovertheatre.org.

28 SATURDAY Brimfield Harvest Festival. Town Common, Main St., Brimfield. 10 a.m. An annual fall celebration featuring crafters and vendors, kids’ games and activities, apple pie baking BAYSTATEPARENT 17

ning. Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton.

5-8 p.m. A special evening for families with members on the autism spectrum, including dinner, and a mini version of The Caterpillar Lab from 5:30 p.m.-7 p.m. Register ahead.

Free. discoveryacton.org.

29 SUNDAY BBQ Fest. Wachusett Mountain, 499 Mountain Road, Princeton. 11 a.m.-5 p.m. Enjoy live music, a craft fair and farmers’ market, contests, cooking demos, and the best BBQ vendors in the area. Adults $9, youths 6 to 12 $4, ages under 5 free. wachusett.com.

Snoopy, Come Home. The Regent Theatre, 7 Medford St., Arlington. 1 p.m. Woodstock, Snoopy, and the Rest of the Peanuts Gang burst onto the screen during this delightful animated feature film that embraces the entire family. Members $7, nonmembers $10. regenttheatre.com.

Hispanic Heritage Month: Papel Picado.

Boston Children’s Museum, 308 Congress St., Boston. 1-3 p.m. Make ‘papel picado’ or ‘pierced paper,’ a Mexican artform in which artists create patterns and images in colored tissue paper using chisel and small hammer.

Free with admission. Members free; nonmember adults $18, youths 1-15 $18, ages under 1 free. bostonchildrensmuseum.org.

Take a Child Outside: Fall Plant Walk with ‘PrimiTim.’ Discovery Museum, 177 Main St., Acton. 1-3 p.m. Come take a walk with naturalist PrimiTim as he teaches different ways to identify autumn plants and foraging tips. Register ahead. Free with admission. Members free; nonmembers $14.50, ages under 1 free. discoveryacton.org.

Beautiful: The Carole King Musical. The Hanover Theatre, 2 Southbridge St., Worcester. 1 p.m. & 6:30 p.m. Experience the true story of Carole King’s rise as a hit songwriter to becoming one of the most successful solo acts in popular music history. $39-88. thehanovertheatre.org.

Outrageous Fortune. Newton Free Library, 330 Homer St., Newton. 2 p.m. Come to the library for a performance by the family-friendly and hilarity inducing Outrageous Fortune. Free. newtonfreelibrary.net.

stART on the Street. Park Ave., Worcester.

30 MONDAY Sensory Play. Worcester Public Library: Frances Perkins Branch, 470 West Boylston St., Worcester. 10:30-11:15 a.m. Explore different textures, substances, and tools including moon sand, colored rice, toys, and much more.

For ages birth to 5 years. Free. mywpl.org.

Africana Studies Harry Carney Saxophone Concert. David Friend Recital Hall, 921 Boylston St., Boston. 7:30 p.m. Danny Harrington of the Harmony Department performs on a newly restored saxophone previously owned by Harry Carney, a longtime member of Duke Ellington’s big band. Free. berklee.edu/events.

Maker’s Weekend. Old Sturbridge Village.

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30 Massachusetts Museums Offering Free Admission This Month

Thirty Massachusetts museums will open their doors for free on Saturday, Sept. 21, thanks to Smithsonian Magazine and its 15th annual Museum Day. For this one-day event, museums and cultural institutions all across the country will offer free admission to anyone with a Museum Day ticket.

Here’s what you need to do: visit smithsonianmag.com/museumday and search for the participating institution you’d like to visit. Then download your ticket, which grants free general admission for two people.

Museums in all 50 states have signed up to participate in this year’s event, and more than 1,300 museums are expected to join in.

The complete list of participating museums can be found at smithsonianmag.com.

USS Constitution Museum Building 22, Charlestown Navy Yard, Charlestown Concord Museum 53 Cambridge Tpke., Concord Martha’s Vineyard Museum 59 School St., Edgartown Cogswell’s Grant 60 Spring St., Essex Falmouth’s Museums on the Green 55-65 Palmer Ave., Falmouth Garden in the Woods 180 Hemenway Rd., Framingham The Gardner Museum 28 Pearl St., Gardner The Museum of Printing 15 Eustis Estate 1424 Canton Ave, Milton Forbes House Museum 215 Adams St., Milton

Participating Massachusetts museums: Beneski Museum of Natural History at Amherst College 11 Barrett Hill Dr., Amherst Mead Art Museum 41 Quadrangle Dr., Amherst College, Amherst The Eric Carle Museum of Picture Book Art 125 West Bay Rd., Amherst John Cabot House 117 Cabot St., Beverly Gibson House Museum 137 Beacon St., Boston

Springfield Museums.

Museum of African American History 46 Joy St., Boston

Durant-Kendrick House and Grounds 286 Waverley Ave., Newton

Museum of Fine Arts, Boston 465 Huntington Ave., Boston The Mary Baker Eddy Library 200 Massachusetts Ave., Boston Cooper-Frost-Austin House 21 Linnaean St., Cambridge Harvard Art Museums 32 Quincy St., Cambridge Harvard Museum of Natural History Harvard Museums of Science & Culture, 26 Oxford St., Cambridge Peabody Museum of Archaeology and Ethnology 11 Divinity Ave., Harvard University, Cambridge

Jackson Homestead and Museum 527 Washington St., Newton Salem Witch Museum 9 1/2 Washington Sq. North, Salem Springfield Museums 21 Edwards St., Springfield Merwin House 14 Main St., Stockbridge Old Colony History Museum 66 Church Green, Taunton Spellman Museum of Stamps and Postal History Regis College, 241 Wellesley St., Weston Iris and B. Gerald Cantor Art Gallery College of the Holy Cross, 1 College St., Worcester

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Best Fall Festivals 25 & Country Fairs

There’s something special about this time of year, as summer slowly melts into fall. One of the best things? You’re never pressed for fun things to do. This is the month for harvest festivals, country fairs, and kid-friendly carnivals. These 20 events are some of the best spots to celebrate the season.

Three County Fair – Northampton

Spencer Fair – Spencer

Dartmouth Grange Fair – Dartmouth

American’s oldest continuously operated fair features livestock and agricultural contests and exhibits, musical entertainment, a farm museum, delicious food vendors, demolition derbies, and an exciting midway with rides and games for all ages. Admission: $12 for adults, $10 for seniors, with children 11 and under free when accompanied by an adult. 3countyfair.com.

Labor Day Weekend, Aug. 30-Sept. 2

Woodstock Fair – Thompson, CT Labor Day Weekend, Aug. 30-Sept. 2

Connecticut’s second-oldest agricultural fair features crafts, lots of food, livestock shows, a petting zoo, free stage shows, midway, go-kart races, produce, and more. Admission: $12, children under 10 are free. woodstockfair.com.

Gloucester Schooner Festival – Gloucester Labor Day Weekend, Aug. 31-Sept. 2

Gloucester’s beautiful harbor is the backdrop for a unique mix of the old and new, as a variety of schooners and vessels sail through in celebration of the town’s fishing and maritime history. The seaport comes alive with family-friendly activities, music, and boat parades. Free. gloucesterschoonerfestival.net

Labor Day Weekend, Aug. 30-Sept. 2

Friday & Saturday, Sept. 6-7

An old-time, traditional country fair with ox and horse pulls, livestock shows, hall exhibits, midway, outdoor entertainment and lots of food. Admission: $12 for adults, $7 for kids 7-12, and free for children under 7. spencerfair.org.

Carnival games, scavenger hunts, nature walks, live animals, and lots of food make this a can’t-miss family event. See live demonstrations of wool spinning and apple cider making, and dig in at the annual pie eating contest. Admission is free. dartmouthgrange.org.

Appleseed Country Fair – Phillipston

Sterling Fair – Sterling

Labor Day Weekend, Aug. 31-Sept. 2

Country fair with hayrides, live music, Brew Barn, tethered hot air balloon rides, locally-made gifts and goodies, animals, children’s activities and more.

Admission: $10 per car load. appleseedcountryfair. com.

King Richard’s Faire – Carver

Weekends, Aug. 31-Oct. 20 (including Mondays, Sept. 2 & Oct. 14)

Entertainment, exciting rides and skilled games abound on the Faire’s enchanting 80 acre wooded site. Step back in time and see acrobats, aerialists, jugglers, dancers, puppeteers – even fire eaters and exotic tigers. Admission: $12 for adults, $17 for children 4-11. kingrichardsfaire.net.

This family-oriented community fair has an emphasis on agriculture and education. Enjoy rides, horse and oxen pulls, helicopter rides, livestock shows, antique machinery, entertainment and more.

Admission is free. sterlingfair.org.

Mattoon Street Arts Festival – Springfield Saturday & Sunday, Sept. 7-8

The longest-running arts festival in the Pioneer Valley features 100 exhibitors, food vendors and strolling musicians all along a beautiful Victorian street. Admission is free. mattoonfestival.org.

Pet Rock Festival – Grafton Old Home Day – Charlton Monday, Sept. 2

Craft fair, art show, highland games and even a frog jumping contest highlight this charming smalltown festival. The fun kicks off with a fireworks display on Saturday, Aug. 31. Admission is free. townofcharlton.net.

Franklin County Fair – Greenfield Friday, Sept. 5-Sunday, Sept. 8

Farm animals, prize-winning produce and classic fair foods make this more-than-century-old event a fall tradition. Classic fair foods, midway, live entertainment and more. Admission: $7, children under 8 are free. fcas.com.

20 SEPTEMBER2019

Friday, Sept. 6-Sunday, Sept. 8

Sunday, Sept. 8

New England’s largest animal welfare festival includes live music, games for kids, doggie massages, contents and water park, pet photos, Pups in the Air Frisbee Dog Team and lots of family- and pet-friendly fun. petrockfest.org.

Team Haverhill’s River Ruckus – Haverhill

Wachusett Mountain KidsFest – Princeton

Saturday, Sept. 21

Saturday & Sunday, Sept. 21-22

Live music, classic cars, a kids’ zone, local food and fireworks over the Merrimack River make this an annual festival not to miss. Admission is free. teamhaverhill.org.

Lenox Apple Squeeze Saturday, Sept. 21

Fresh Grass Festival – North Adams Friday, Sept. 20Sunday, Sept. 22

Artisans, musicians, farm stands and performers gather to celebrate the apple harvest at this engaging street festival for all ages. Children’s games, wagon rides and all-things-apple usher in fall in the Berkshires. Admission is free. lenox.org.

Two days of music, food, and family fun. Enjoy live performances, walk-around entertainment, magic shows, and clowns, and see it all from above on the scenic summit SkyRide. Admission: $10 for adults, $8 for kids 6-12.

North Quabbin Garlic & Arts Festival – Orange Saturday & Sunday, Sept. 28-29

There is something for everyone at this family-friendly fall event, held on a beautiful historic farm amidst autumn foliage. Over 100 booths of regional artists, farmers, and garlic cuisine, live music and kids activities. Admission is free. garlicandarts.org.

A wonderland of bluegrass and roots music tucked into a 19th century factory-turned-21st century museum in the Berkshire mountains. This family-friendly event brims with talent on four stages, in brick-lined courtyards and on grassy fields. Admission $48, with children under 6 free. freshgrass.com

The Big E – W. Springfield Friday, Sept. 13-Sunday, Sept. 29

The Eastern States Exposition is the largest fair in the Northeast, with rides, games, contests, parades, live entertainment and more. There is truly something for everyone at this New England autumn tradition, which is the ninth largest fair in North America. Admission: $15 for adults, $10 for kids ages 6-12, children under 5 are free. thebige.com.

stART on the Street – Worcester Sunday, Sept. 15

Shop handmade items from over 300 crafters, watch artists create unique works right on the street, enjoy music, performances and kids’ activities. Admission is free. startonthestreet.org.

Belchertown Fair – Belchertown Friday, Sept. 20-Sunday, Sept. 22

This community fair features plenty of fun for kids, including rides, balloon twisting, circus performers, a kids’ activity area and a petting zoo. Traditional exhibit halls, horse and oxen pulls add to the classic fall fun. Admission is free. belchertownfair.com.

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22 SEPTEMBER2019

our fave

4

1.

The world is their canvas! You donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have to tell kids not to color on these four fun color-in finds.

2.

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1. This twin-size World Map Duvet Cover by eatsleepdoodle is filled with fun facts, wild animals and exotic sea creatures.

Comes with ten fabric markers. amazon.com. $39.99.

3.

2. Color your own t-shirt with bright, water-based chalk markers. The design stays put until the chalkboard is wiped clean.

Kits by Chalk of the Town include t-shirt, markers and stencils and come in several chalkboard shapes. amazon.com. $29.95

4. Use washable markers to color in this Customizable Canvas Backpack by OMy -- then toss it in the laundry and color it over and over again. ohmy-maison. com. $24.50.

From unicorns to dinosaurs, from cacti or flowers to cheeseburgers or candy, Crayola makes a pair of Color-in Socks suited for any kidâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s interests.

Fabric markers included. amazon.com. $11.99.

BAYSTATEPARENT 23

29th Annuwahlole

Sep 21-2 10a

fun for they! famil

g n i r u t a e F

Troy Wunderle

Stilt Walking, Stage Shows & Circus Area

Flying High Frisbee Dogs

Flippin Out Trampoline Show

Special Appeara ic s u M e v Li ck

o R s d i K l Joe s d i K O L & WX ow h S t n e l Ta

Princess Elsa & Ariel Juggles Captain Jack Sparrow Mag Gramma Potts Orso PLUS

SkyRide • Polar Samples • Food Truc

24 SEPTEMBER2019

ptember 22, 2019 am–5pm

Activities

Sterling Gym Ninja Warrior Course

Kids’ Slope Learning Area Climbing Wall

Rainforest Reptile Show

ances

s and Glitter gic Steve on & Paws

Pony Rides & Petting Zoo Stuff a Bear • Inflatables Games • Facepainting & More!

cks • Balloon Artists Details & Tickets at www.wachusett.com 499 Mountain Road, Princeton, MA 978-464-2300 Wachusett Mountain operates in cooperation with the MA Department of Conservation & Recreation BAYSTATEPARENT 25

Out of the Darkness

After Tragic Loss, Local Family Urges Parents to Open Up Conversation About Suicide

BY AMANDA COLLINS BERNIER

The Valoras family, Emily, Alysia, Dean and Nicholas, at their home in Grafton holding a photo of Alexandra. Ashley Green photo

Are there times you imagine Alexandra all grown up?

Yes, I do.

Because, I am your dad, I know your heart Because, I’ve always known your heart Because, I am your heart We are one.

In one version of the future, Alexandra Lee Valoras… slips into her own skin.

Alexandra is Comfortable, Confident & Quirky

Out in the city with her friends, on a warm, August evening. Alexandra talks about a guy at work who, with a little coaxing recently asked her out on a date.

Alexandra is Radiance

The waiter hands Alexandra a cranberry, vodka seltzer, and smiles at her as he walks away. Alexandra comments, “He’s cute too!”

26 SEPTEMBER2019

Alexandra is Authenticity & Exploration

I see you Alexandra I see you “Wa-tutra”

I know Dad I see you too -I see you, by Dean Valoras

S

ometimes Dean Valoras imagines his oldest daughter, Alexandra, all grown up. She’d wear her curly hair untamed -- straightening it seemed like a trivial waste of time, she’d once remarked.

She’d have degrees and awards to her name, but she’d never boast or belittle. No matter what accolades she’d have garnered, she’d feel most satisfied by being a friend and doing good.

It’s not a stretch to imagine Alexandra as such an incredible young woman. As a teenager, she showed every sign of success: an honors student who was involved in her school and community, a robotics whiz who had her sights set on MIT. She was beloved by her parents, siblings and friends, and by all accounts seemed happy and full of life.

But inside, there was an anguish no one saw. And instead of growing into the woman her father can picture in his head, Alexandra slipped out of her Grafton home in the early hours of a cold March morning in 2018, walked to nearby Mass. Pike overpass, and jumped.

Alexandra Lee Valoras, a 17-year-old high school junior, was one of thousands of teens who die by suicide every year.

The rates of suicide among 15to 19-year-olds has been rising for the past decade, and it is currently the second-leading cause of death among people ages 10 to 24, according to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Even more disturbing are national surveys that tell us that 17 percent of high

school students admit to thinking about suicide and almost 9 percent acknowledge actually making an attempt.

Still, it was something that Dean and Alysia Valoras never had on their radar. Alexandra, the oldest of their three children, was a high-achieving engineering student at Blackstone Valley Technical Vocational High School. She showed no outward signs of concern. She volunteered at the Grafton Community Barn, joined her family at the dinner table every night, had friends, drive, and plans for the future.

“She was comfortable in her geekiness. She seemed happy with who she was; happy in her shoes and comfortable in her self-image,” her mom, Alysia, recalls. “But it was so not -- so not how she saw herself in her journal. Not even close.”

A secret self On the overpass from which she jumped, along with her jacket and boots, Alexandra left two journals that revealed “a different person all together” than the girl her family knew. When her parents look back on her first entries in August 2017, six months before her death, they said they see some resemblance to the Alexandra they knew, but progressively, things changed.

By October, she was writing, almost whimsically, about suicide. And day after day, week after week, her entries grew more negative, sour, self-loathing. “‘I’m not worth it.’ ‘I can’t do it.’ She’d write all these ways of

A family photo of Alexandra Valoras. how she was unworthy,” said Dean. Meanwhile, her grades stayed top-notch, even went up a bit. She participated in extra-curricular activities, went on trips with her family, and played guitar in the den with her dad. Aside from feeling some stress about an upcoming AP exam, her parents saw nothing of the girl in the journal.

In December, she went to see Scottish rock band, Biffy Clyro with her dad at the Palladium in Worcester. They laughed and danced on the balcony, and he videoed her smiling in her seat, taking it all in. “That night she went home and wrote ‘I had to

Alysia and Dean recall memories of Alexandra in the backyard of their Grafton home. Ashley Green photo

put on a face, show I was having a good time,’” Dean said. “There was an effort on her part that she had to put on a smile. But to us, there wasn’t really a reason to be concerned.”

Signs to look for Suicide can be caused by a constellation of risk factors and underlying vulnerabilities, and biologically, teens may be more susceptible.

“Teenage brains are still developing and the emotional center of the brain develops faster than the part of the brain that impacts judgment and decision making. This results in teens and young adults being more susceptible to impulsive actions in response to intense feelings,” said Brian Skehan MD, PhD, the Director of Child Emergency Mental Health and Associate Director of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry Training at the University of Massachusetts Medical School.

Many teens at risk for suicide display warning signs. “Paying attention to changes in sleep, food intake, and school performance may be the most objective measures to monitor. Even ‘angsty’ teens need to eat and sleep,” said Dr. Skehan. More subtle signs include withdrawing from friends and family, seemingly excessive physical complaints, and changes in mood, including persistent sadness. Changes in substance use may also indicate emotional pain and increase the risk of impulsive actions.

Teens at risk may also display signs of depression like decreased energy, or spending

less time with peers or participating in activities that they used to enjoy, but Skehan notes that depression and suicidal thoughts are not the same.

“Suicidal thoughts can be present when teens are stressed, feel pressure to perform, or are experiencing self-doubt or loss,” he said.

But what about the Alexandras of the world? The teens who show seemingly no outward signs of risk? Dean and Alysia said since their daughter’s death, they’ve heard from dozens of parents across the country who had an Alexandra of their own -- a thriving and seemling happy kid, who left them blindsided when they took their life.

“The signs that we saw didn’t translate to signs of suicide.

What she showed, and what we saw, it still doesn’t fit,” said Alysia.

Starting the conversation Dean remembers a particular ride home from school on an afternoon not long before his daughter’s death. Alexandra got in the car, put on a song, turned the volume up loud, and they drove home in silence.

“I read that as, wow, my daughter’s cool with me being present when she’s clearly had a shitty day of high school. So I didn’t dwell or press her on talking. All I asked her was, ‘seems like you had a bad day?’

And she said, ‘dad you don’t know the half of it.’ That was probably my sign that we should sit down and talk about it, but instead I said, ‘let’s go in and have dinner,’” he said. “Oh, BAYSTATEPARENT 27

the dance of being a parent.

When do you pry? When do you engage, and when do you let it go?”

Looking back, Alysia wishes she had been more frank.

“I think right up front I would ask her, ‘are you thinking of hurting yourself?’ I never had asked her that, but I think I would. If anything I guess it could have been maybe the rope that she needed us to throw her so that she could climb out,” she said.

Suicide is a difficult topic, but it’s too important to ignore. The incidence of suicide across all age groups has increased over the last 10 years but the rates of suicide have been rising even faster among people ages 15 to 24. While research has identified the increase in rate, the cause of this rise is less clear. What we do know is that talking openly about suicidal thoughts and feelings can help save a life.

Dr. Skehan reassures parents that it is OK to bring it up. “There is no evidence that parental concern can increase a youth’s risk. In fact, asking your child about suicide may reassure them that somebody cares.

Parent’s comfort in talking about suicide may encourage youth to be more open with their thoughts instead of feeling alone and isolated with their worry and despair.”

If the discusision isn’t prompt-

28 SEPTEMBER2019

ed by something your child is saying or doing that worries you, the Society for the Prevention of Teen Suicide (SPTS) recommends approaching the topic in the same way as other subjects that are important to you, but may or may not be important to your child. Pick a time when you have their attention, like a car ride, or after a suicide has recieved media attention to bring up the subject. If this is a hard subject for you to talk about, admit it. The SPTS suggests saying something like, “You know, I never thought this was something I’d be talking with you about, but I think it’s really important.”

Ask your child how they’re doing, what’s happening in their world these days, and what their concerns are. It can start simply by asking, “Are you okay?”

Parents should listen without judgement, ask open-ended questions, and validate their children’s feelings. There is a full guide to starting the conversation at sptsusa.org.

Out of the darkness In the 18 months since Alexandra’s death, the Valoras family has granted with interviews with journalists from around the country. Last summer, The Boston Globe published their story along with snippets from Alexandra’s jour-

nals. In March, the CBS Sunday Morning Show aired a piece featuring the family. They’re open with Alexandra’s hidden anguish, and their own agony, because they are determined to take the topic of suicide out of the shadows and to advance a dialogue around it.

In February, almost a year after his daughter’s death, Dean started a public blog; a way to work through his own emotions that offers a glimpse into the grief of a suicide survivor.

“Letters to Alexandra,” https:// rocktherisingblue.wordpress. com/, is where he puts his thoughts, memories, and hopes.

His poem “I See You” on page 26, is his latest entry, the channeling of a flurry of thoughts that came to him one night went he pictured a 20-something Alexandra.

Alysia has opened up in a different way. She was part of a community forum in Grafton that explored mental health issues among adolescents. In February, she spoke to 200 high school students at Whitinsville Christian School about teen suicide, encouraging them to reach out to someone if they’re in a crisis.

Later she heard that nearly two dozen of those kids had visited the guidance office and asked for help.

This fall, Alysia will be speaking at a high-achieving district in West Lafayette, Indiana, and

has plans to talk to students at another school in Texas.

“I want to explore if it’s a way I can affect some change. I want to let them know her story, who Alexandra was, and throw out that lifeline. Know that if they are starting to think about this, even a little bit, to talk to someone. I want to reach someone sooner,” she said. She can be reached for possible speaking engagements at alysiavaloras@gmail.com.

If you think your child is at risk Any youth with suicidal thoughts should have an immediate evaluation by a trained mental health professional, said Dr. Skehan. Limiting access to prescription drugs and firearms (two of the three leading mechanisms of suicide in youth) can reduce access to lethal options.

For emergent concerns, youth mobile crisis clinicians are available throughout the state by calling 1-877-382-1609 or they can be seen in your local emergency room. Primary care offices, school guidance offices, and behavioral health clinics are other options for less urgent concerns, said Skehan. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is also available 24 hours a day for individuals or concerned loved ones at 1-800-273-8255.

SUICIDE PREVENTION RESOURCES NATIONAL SUICIDE PREVENTION LIFELINE The Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources. 1-800-273-8255.

CRISIS TEXT LINE Every texter is connected with a Crisis Counselor, a real-life human being trained to bring texters from a hot moment to a cool calm through active listening and collaborative problem solving, 24/7. Text “HOME” to 741-741.

THE TREVOR PROJECT The TrevorLifeline is a 24/7 hotline for young LGBTQ people in crisis, feeling suicidal, or in need of a judgement-free place to talk.

1-866-488-7386.

TRANS LIFELINE Peer-support hotline run by and for trans people. 877-565-8860.

THE SAMARITANS STATEWIDE Call or text this crisis helpline.

877-870-4673.

MASSACHUSETTS COALITION FOR PREVENTION OF SUICIDE Local resources and regional coalitions. masspreventsuicide.org.

bites

FOOD FOR THOUGHT • NUTRITION • GOOSE’S GOODIES

BAYSTATEPARENT 29

Bites

Food for

Thought

‘Lentils Will Help You Run Faster’ Communicating Food Benefits Gets Kids to Eat Healthier

C

ommunicating food benefits to children that they can relate to may get them to eat healthier.

That’s according to a study published recently in the Journal of Nutrition Education and Behavior. Researchers found affirming statements like “eat your lentils if you want to grow bigger and run faster” were more effective at getting kids to make healthy food choices than presenting the food repeatedly without conversation.

In fact, kids ate twice as much healthy food when they were told how it would benefit them in terms they could understand as opposed to when they were given the food with no contextual information.

“Every child wants to be bigger, faster, able to jump higher,” said Jane Lanigan, the lead author of the study. “Using these types of examples made the food more attractive to eat.”

Previous research shows that offering foods repeatedly increases the likelihood that kids will try

something new. But that research didn’t look at the context of those offerings, Lanigan said.

In their study, Lanigan and her colleagues wanted to see if child-centered nutrition phrases (CCNP), affirmative statements that simply convey the benefits of healthy food, influenced young children to make healthier food choices. The phrases focus on goals children have and are based on accurate nutrition information.

Researchers ran an experiment where they offered healthy foods to a group of 3- to 5-year old children for six weeks. Before beginning, the 87 children in the experiment ranked how much they liked four foods chosen from different food groups including, green peppers (vegetable), tomatoes (vegetables), quinoa (grain), and lentils (protein).

The kids were then offered two of the foods they liked the least twice a week. Over the six-week experiment, the researchers presented the children one of their low-rated foods with pre-selected age-appropriate facts about the benefits of the food.

The other food was merely given to them to taste. A coin flip determined which food would be paired with the child-centered nutrition phrase. The experiment was built into the kids’ normal class routine.

The researchers then measured how much the kids ate at three times: pre-test, posttest, and one month after the study ended. The immediate post-test showed no result, likely because the kids “got sick of eating the same foods,” Lanigan said.

But the month-after measurement told a different story.

“We found that a month later, the kids ate twice as much of their CCNP food with the repeated exposure compared to the food without the positive words,” Lanigan said. “For example, when we presented lentils we would say, ‘This will help you grow bigger and run faster.”

Over time, Lanigan and colleagues’ study shows that using CCNPs is likely to increase the amount of healthy food that children eat.

“I have two kids and I probably could have done things differently when trying to get them to eat healthier,” Lanigan said. “We wanted to fill a gap, where parents are often told what their kids should be eating but not how to get them to eat it. And that’s really important.”

New Book Features Playful Poses & Kid-Friendly Recipes

B

estselling author and nutrition expert Joy Bauer’s debut children’s book “Yummy Yoga” hits shelves next month, offering an imaginative introduction to fitness and nutrition for little ones. The book features photos of kids demonstrating yoga poses, and on the opposite page, fun fruits and veggies practicing the same poses. Lift the flaps to find simple, healthy recipes incorporating all the ingredients featured in each photo. By showcasing fresh produce and healthy ingredients in a fun way, the hope is that both kids will be engaged in the foodprep process, and to stretch their bodies -- and taste buds.

30 SEPTEMBER2019

Whip Up Seasonal

Eats &Treats

J

ust in time for the holiday season, Kidstir, a monthly subscription box that encourages children to cook, play and learn about food, is launching three festively-themed cooking kits during the months of October, November and December. In the Spooky Celebration Kit, little ghouls and goblins can find out how to make three Halloween recipes, including a Witch’s Brew with skull and bones ice cubes, and Scary-oli using a new pasta press. The Gobbling Good Fixings Kit has three easy recipes kids can cook up for your Thanksgiving feast, and Gratitude Game to play at the dinner table. The Winter Wonderland Cookie Kit has three fun-tomake cookie recipes, a snow globe gifting jar, and gift tags. A 3-month subscription is $15.95/month. kidstir.com.

Bites

ask the nutritionist

Canned Food Myths Debunked

Q

Are canned vegetables and other foods nutritious for my family?

A

: The affordability of canned foods entices many people to stock up on the essentials.

However, there are some people who still harbor concerns about the safety of canned foods.

Getting to the truth about canned foods can assuage some of those concerns.

Myth #1: Canned foods are not as healthy as fresh foods.

Fresh foods, once harvested, have a finite shelf life. Plus, once fruit or vegetables are picked, their vitamin and mineral content decreases each day that they are not consumed. Canned produce can lose some of its nutritional value as well, particularly water-soluble nutrients like vitamins B and C. But overall, the nutrients in canned fruits and vegetables tend to be relatively stable because they are protected from the deteriorating effects of oxygen Myth #2: Canned foods are full of preservatives.

The perception that canned foods are “processed” foods often leads people to believe they’re full of unsavory ingredients. The term processing is used to describe any food that has been changed from its natural form. So removing corn from a cob counts as processing, as is baking or boiling potatoes.

Canned foods are preserved by heating the items and sealing them under pressure. No other preservatives are needed to keep them fresh.

Myth #3: Can linings are dangerous.

There has been controversy concerning BPA-containing plastics for many years. Even though the Food and Drug Administration, as well as other international food safety agencies, has evaluated the extensive body of science and continue to affirm BPA’s safety in food packaging, some manufacturers are voluntarily moving away from it.

Consumers can find many foods packed in cans with non-BPA linings. However, even foods packaged in BPA are considered safe for consumption.

Myth #4: Canned foods are full of sodium.

Some canned foods will contain salt as an added ingredient to improve taste and act as a freshness preservative. But canned foods do not rank among the biggest offenders in regard to excessive amounts of sodium. In 2012, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention released a study that identified the top 10 food categories that contribute to high sodium diets. Pizza, cured meats, cold cuts, and rolls made the list, while canned foods did not.

Myth #5: All dented cans are unsafe.

Cans can become dented in transit. Drop a can and it will dent. But that doesn’t necessarily mean foods inside dented cans are unsafe to eat. If a can is bulging or if the top or bottom of the can moves or makes a popping sound, the seal has probably been broken or compromised by bacteria and should be thrown out.

BAYSTATEPARENT 31

Bites

goose’s

goodies

Sour Cream Apple Squares Apple season is here! Use your orchard haul to make a batch of these scrumptious squares this fall. Use any variety of apple you’d like!

Ingredients • • • • • • • • • • •

2 cups flour 2 cups brown sugar ½ cup margarine, softened 1 cup chopped walnuts 1 teaspoon baking soda 1 teaspoon cinnamon ½ teaspoon salt 1 cup sour cream 1 teaspoon vanilla 1 egg 2 cups chopped apples

Directions Combine flour, brown sugar and margarine. With an electric mixer, beat on low until crumbly, then stir in the nuts.

Press 2 ¾ cups of mixture into a 9x13 baking pan.

To the remaining crumb mixture ass baking soda, cinnamon, salt, sour cream, vanilla and egg. Mix well.

Spoon mixture over over crumbs in pan.

Bake at 350 degrees for 40 minutes.

Cool, then cut into squares.

Laurie Silva Collins, known affectionately as Goose by her grandkids, is a nurse, mother and grandmother who is happiest when she’s in the kitchen, cooking and baking for those she loves. She learned to cook from her parents, and has perfected her recipes over the years while raising three daughters… and spoiling seven grandchildren.

32 SEPTEMBER2019

BAYSTATEPARENT 33

2019 Apple Picking Guide Davis Farmland and Mega Maze 145 Redstone Hill, Sterling 978-422-6666 davisfarmland.com Hours: Weekends 10 a.m.- 6 p.m.

Doe Orchards 327 Ayer Rd., Harvard 978-772-4139 doeorchards.com Hours: Daily 10 a.m.-5 p.m.

Bonus: Farmstand, dog-friendly Douglas Orchard & Farm 36 Locust St., Douglas douglasorchardandfarm.com Hours: Wednesday and Friday through Sunday 8 a.m.-6 p.m.

Bonus: Live music at the pavilion Sept. 7 & 14 Apple Festival on Sept. 14 will feature vendors, food trucks, music, face painting, apple baking contest and more

A

mong autumn’s most beloved traditions is apple picking. Check out these area pick-your-own orchards, grab a bushel, and take a bite out of this year’s apple season. Many of these spots offer more than fruit picking, too. Hop on a hayride, weave your way through a corn maze, or even grab a pint of beer. Happy picking! (Meltdown Warning: while we’ve done our best to ensure the accuracy of this information, things can and do change. Please call or check the website before heading out on your apple adventure.)

Berlin Orchards Route 62 and Lower Sawyer Hill Road, Berlin 978-838-2400 berlinorchards.com Hours: Daily 10 a.m.-5 p.m.

Bonus: Pumpkin painting and hay wagon rides to and from the orchard on weekends Bolton Spring Farm 159 Main Street (Route 117), Bolton 978-779-2898 boltonspringfarm.com Hours: Daily 9 a.m.-6 p.m. starting Labor Day weekend Bonus: Country store and bakery on site, hayrides on weekends Breezelands Orchards 1791 Southbridge Road, Warren 413-436-7122 breezelandsorchards.com Hours: Daily 10 a.m-6 p.m.

Bonus: Farmstand with pies, donuts, local honey, cheese and more 34 SEPTEMBER2019

Brookfield Orchards 121 Lincoln Rd, North Brookfield 508-867-6858 brookfieldorchardsonline.com Hours: Daily 9 a.m.-5 p.m.

Bonus: Country store and bakery, playground and wagon rides Harvest Craft Fair on Sept. 7 & 8 will feature artisans, crafters and farm vendors with handmade items, artwork and goodies. Enjoy pizza, craft beer and wine, hayrides and live music.

Carlson Orchards 115 Oak Hill Road, Harvard 978-456-3916 carlsonorchards.com Hours: Daily 9 a.m.-4 p.m.

Bonus: Retail store, cider donuts, hard cider Carver Hill Orchards 101 Brookside Ave, Stow 978-897-6117 carverhillorchard.com Hours: Daily 10 a.m.-5 p.m.

Fairmount Fruit Farm 887 Lincoln St., Franklin 508-533-8737 fairmountfruit.com Hours: Weekdays 1 p.m.-5 p.m.; Weekends 10 a.m.-4 p.m.

Bonus: Dog-friendly

Charlton Orchards 44 Old Worcester Rd., Charlton 508-248-7820 charltonorchards.com Hours: Monday through Saturday 10 a.m.4 p.m., Sunday 10 a.m.-4 p.m.

Fay Mountain Farm 12 Cemetery Rd., Charlton 617-981-2051 Hours: Wednesday through Friday 12-7 p.m.; Weekends 9 a.m.-5 p.m.

Clearview Farm 4 Kendall Hill Rd., Sterling 978-422-6442 clearviewfarmstand.com Hours: Daily 9 a.m.-6 p.m.

Bonus: Dog-friendly, hayrides, bakery with donuts, cookies, and fresh-pressed cider

Foppema’s Hilltop Orchard 10 McClellan Rd., Sutton 508-234-6711 foppemasfarm.com Hours: Weekends 10 a.m.-5 p.m.

Cook’s Farm Orchard 106 Haynes Hill Rd., Brimfield 413-245-3241 Hours: Daily 10 a.m.-5 p.m.

Bonus: Tractor rides and bakery open on weekends, dog-friendly

George Hill Orchard 582 George Hill Rd., Lancaster 978-365-4331 yourfavoritefarm.com Hours: Sunday, Tuesday through Friday, 9 a.m.- 6 p.m.

Hawk Hill Orchards 83 Carleton Rd., Millbury 508-865-4037 Hours: Wednesday through Friday 12- 5 p.m.; Weekends & Holidays 10 a.m.- 5 p.m.

Bonus: Country store with pies, donuts and dumplings; picnic area Highland Farm 635 Highland St., Holliston 508- 429-8370 highlandfarmorchard.net Hours: Weekends 10 a.m.-4 p.m.

Bonus: Homemade apple cider, ice cream, caramel apples Hollis Hills Farm 340 Marshall Rd., Fitchburg 978-696-3130 hollishillsfarm.com Hours: Wednesday through Sunday 9 a.m.- 5 p.m.

Bonus: Sugar House open on the weekends, group maple tours every Wednesday Honey Pot Hill Orchards 138 Sudbury Rd., Stow 978-562-5666 honeypothill.com Hours: Daily 9:30 a.m.- 5 p.m.

Bonus: Mazes, hayrides and farm animals Hyland Orchard & Brewery 199 Arnold Rd., Sturbridge 508-347-7500 hylandorchard.com Hours: Weekends 12-5 p.m.

Bonus: Live music, brewery, wagon rides, farm animals, dog-friendly Lanni Orchards 294 Chase Rd., Lunenburg 978-582-6246 lanniorchards.com Hours: Daily 8 a.m.- 6 p.m.

Bonus: Corn maze, hayrides Sunflower Festival Sept. 1-8 with four acres of beautiful sunflowers in a variety of colors to pick and to take photos in.

Meadowbrook Orchard 209 Chace Hill Rd., Sterling 978-365-7617 meadowbrookorchards.com Hours: Daily 8 a.m.-5 p.m.

Bonus: Farmstore, bakery, year-round restaurant

2019 Apple Picking Guide Nashoba Valley Winery 100 Wattaquadoc Hill Rd., Bolton 978-779-5521 nasobawinery.com Hours: Daily 11 a.m.-4:30 p.m.

Bonus: winery, brewery, picnic area Nicewicz Family Farm 116 Sawyer Rd., Bolton 978-779-6423 nicewiczfarm.com Hours: Weekdays, 12-6 p.m.; Saturday 9 a.m.- 5:30 p.m.; Sunday 9 a.m.-6 p.m.

Old Frog Pond Farm 38 Eldridge Road., Harvard 978-456-9828 oldfrogpondfarm.com Hours: Weekends 11 a.m.- 5p.m.

Bonus: Outdoor sculpture walk, plein air poetry walk, African drumming and more

Parker’s Orchard 11 Spring Rd., Westborough 508-615-7363 Hours: Daily 10 a.m. - 5 p.m.

Pease Orchard 11 Phillipston Rd, Templeton 978- 939-5324 peaseorchard.com Hours: Weekends 9 a.m.- 4 p.m.

Bonus: Apple cider and freshly baked goods Ragged Hill Orchard 94 John Gilbert Rd., West Brookfield 508-867-2187 raggedhill.com Hours: Daily 9 a.m. - 6 p.m.

Red Apple Farm 455 Highland Ave., Phillipston 800-628-4851

redapplefarm.com Hours: Monday through Thursday 9 a.m.-6 p.m., Friday & Saturday 9 a.m.-8 p.m., Sunday 9 a.m.-7 p.m.

Bonus: Brew barn, fall BBQ, hayrides, farm animals Appleseed Country Fair Sept. 1 & 2 featuring over 40 vendors, local food and food trucks, human-tractor pulls, brew and wine barn, fiddle contest, live music and more.

Bonus: Hayrides, live music, farm animals, kids’ activities and playground

Hours: see website Bonus: Ice cream, farm tours & wagon rides

Sholan Farms 1125 Pleasant St., Leominster 978-840-3276 sholanfarms.com Hours: Daily 10 a.m.-1 p.m.

Bonus: Farmstand with fresh produce

Westward Orchard 178 Massachusetts Ave., Harvard 978-456-8363 westwardorchard.com Hours: Daily 9 a.m.- 4 p.m.

Bonus: Wagon rides on weekends

Schartner Farm 211 West Berlin Rd., Bolton 978-779-0212 schartnerfarm.com Hours: Weekends 10 a.m.-5 p.m.

Bonus: Free hayrides, corn maze

Stowe Farm 15 Stowe Rd., Millbury 508-865-9860 stowefarm.com Hours: Weekends, 10 a.m.-5 p.m.

Bonus: Country store, pony rides, petting zoo, gem mining, rock wall, ice cream

Shelburne Farm 106 West Acton Rd., Stow 978-897-9287 shelburnefarm.com Hours: Daily 9 a.m.- 6 p.m.

Wojcik’s Farm 65 Milk St., Blackstone 508-883-9220 wojcikfarm.com Hours: Friday 5-9 p.m.; Saturday 10 a.m.9 p.m.; Sunday 10 a.m.-6 p.m.

Bonus: Farm store and bakery, corn maze, wagon rides

Tougas Family Farm 234 Ball St., Northborough 508-393-6406 tougasfarm.com

The Core of Fall ...

Apple Picking!

Contact Mia Haringstad at 774-415-4851 or at mharingstad@ gatehousemedia.com to be featured here next month!

BAYSTATEPARENT 35

THE ENRICHMENT ISSUE

Arts for All

very

special people

Where to Find Sensory-Friendly Theater, Visual Arts & Other Entertainment

BY JOAN GOODCHILD

F

or children with autism or sensory processing disorder, some common forms of entertainment may be overwhelming. A trip to the movie theater might be a bit too loud, or dark, for sensitive eyes and ears. Bright lights and singing in live theater could be frightening for some kids.

That’s where sensory-friendly entertainment comes in, and many entertainment venues are increasingly offering opportunities for kids with disabilities to enjoy some fun in an atmosphere that has their unique needs in mind.

“A lot of sensory-friendly theater has to do with creating a culture of acceptance,” said Troy Siebels, president and CEO of the Hanover Theatre for the Performing Arts in

36 SEPTEMBER2019

Worcester. “It’s designed to be comfortable and there’s an understanding that attendees can act in any way and still feel appropriate.

I think creating an environment of acceptance helps everyone enjoy it.”

Siebels and his team at the Hanover have put on a sensory-friendly showing of their live play A Christmas Carol annually for the last several years. The theater often partners with other area organizations, such as the New England Chapter of Autism Speaks, Theatre Development Fund, HMEA’s Autism Resource Central and VSA Massachusetts to offer the performance.

Described as a “supportive and judgment-free environment,” accommodations of support include a quiet area if individuals and families need a break, and trained staff and volunteers to assist with other needs.

Because it is a performance put on

in-house, the theater has the flexibility to change some elements for the special showing, explained Siebels.

“We have the house lights at a glow instead of turning them all the way down,” he said. “We tone down some of the most startling sounds and at the start we introduce the scariest characters. For example, Jacob Marley comes out and introduces himself.”

The modifications, said Siebels, are a way for the audience be 100 percent into the narrative, without being startled.

“The cast loves doing this,” he said. “They feel it’s an important thing to do and a rewarding thing to do.”

Fine arts like theater, film, music and visual arts are a wonderful outlet for self-exploration, creativity and self-expression.

Experiences in the arts play a valuable role

in helping a person to participate fully in the community and in society as a whole, but introducing the arts into the life experience of a child with autism can be daunting.

Still, there are many venues around the Bay State where families with children with autism can find sensory-friendly arts experiences and other entertainment.

Beyond the Spectrum is program through the Museum of Fine Arts in Boston that is specially designed for children and teens with Autism Spectrum Disorders. The program meets on select Saturdays and combine gallery exploration with an art-making activity. Classes offered for 8 to 12-year-olds feature a structured gallery tour, followed by a creative art-making workshop. For teens, each class focuses on specific art topics and incorporate discussion, critical inquiry, and sketching in the galleries.

Children and teens with autism can take part in fine arts gallery exploration and workshops through Beyond the Spectrum at the MFA Boston.

Photo courtesy of mfa.org during this time so kids can explore Students then work independently with less concern about infections on a project with guidance from an and large crowds. At the Discovery experienced instructor.

Museum in Acton, families with Several Cinemagic movie thechildren with an ASD, hearing loss, aters, including those in Salisbury or vision loss, and Sturbridge, can enjoy offer sensory free admisand family-friendly sion during showings so a monthly small children, program, or those who Especially for have autism or Me, where SPD, can enjoy capacity is limtheir movie ited to families going experidealing with developmental ence in a safe challenges. and accepting The program environment. increases As the web site access to explains, the museum exhibtheater keeps the auditorium its and provide Startling effects in the classic prolights turned an opportunity duction of A Christmas Carol, like slightly up for families to Marley, seen here in chains, are and the sound network with modified to be less overwhelming turned slightly one another in in the annual sensory-friendly perdown. Because an understandformance at The Hanover Theatre. some have ing environPhoto courtesy Hanover Theatre strict, special ment. dietary needs, There is families are permitted to bring their also a sensory-friendly evening at own gluten-free, casein-free snacks Southwick Zoo in Mendon. And from home.

Altitude Trampoline Parks around “Additionally, audience members the state offer sensory-friendly are welcome to get up and dance, Saturdays with less crowds, lower walk, shout or sing - in other words, music and inflatable toys. our no talking policy will not be This is just a small sampling of enforced unless the audience safety the opportunities out there for famis in question,” the site notes. ilies looking for a different setting Many Massachusetts museums to enjoy time out with kids who have sensory-friendly offerings, as need special accommodations. It well. Morningstar Access at Boston is worth asking your local enterChildren’s Museum is a chance for tainment venues if they offer senchildren with special needs to visit sory-free hours or events. If they the museum at a time when there don’t, they might even be encourare only a few other visitors. The aged to start one if you ask! museum has a limit of 100 guests BAYSTATEPARENT 37

THE ENRICHMENT ISSUE

Parents, Let the Coach do the Coaching

BY CHERYL MAGUIRE

I

officially became a “soccer mom” last year when my 8-yearold daughter enrolled in the town soccer team. She loves playing the sport and interacting with the other girls on her team.

Being part of the team has entailed traveling to other towns. Sometimes we have witnessed other games in progress while waiting for her game to begin. I’ve been shocked to see parents yelling in an aggressive manner at either at kids or the coach.

In Braintree, Massachusetts a girl’s basketball high school coach quit due to parent complaints.

The coach helped bring the team two back-to-back Division 1 state championships and had a 63-game winning streak, yet the parents were still dissatisfied.

Research at the University of Maryland found 53 percent of parents reported feeling angry during their child’s soccer game. This is an issue in many towns across America caused by various factors.

Social Media: In Braintree, the parents created an email exchange complaining about their child’s playing time. The coach became tired of dealing with the parent complaints resulting in her resignation. Studies have found that people tend to bully online since they are not held accountable. Social media and email messages lack a person’s tone or body language causing miscommunication.

Also if a person sends an angry message, the person receiving the message can read it over and over again resulting in hurt feelings.

High College Costs: According to College Data, public college tuition can cost an average of $24,610 per year and a private college averaged $49,320. With the high costs of colleges, parents want or need their child to receive scholarships. The pressure of winning a scholarship from playing a sport has created parents who either have unrealistic expectations or become angry when their child isn’t participating.

High Cost of Sports: Participation in sports can be expensive. Players are required to purchase sports gear and usually pay a fee for being on a team, even in public schools. According to research at University of Michigan Health System on average, a player had to pay a $125 participation fee and $275 for sports equipment and travel.

Thirty years ago when a child played baseball often the team shared a helmet 38 SEPTEMBER2019

and bat. Now most players have two bats, their own helmet, batting gloves, and a baseball bag. When a parent pays these high costs, they feel they should be getting their money’s worth and when their child doesn’t play, they get angry at the coach.

Parent Personality: Research has found that control-oriented parents are more angry and aggressive during their child’s sporting events than autonomy-oriented parents. A control-oriented parent is a person who is concerned about other people’s opinions and motivated by external forces whereas an autonomy- oriented parent is driven by their own goals. During games the control-oriented parent tends to take things personally. For example if a coach pulls their child from the game, this type of parent may feel it is a personal attack against their child rather than an impartial decision by the coach.

Parents Vicariously Living Through Their Child: Often parents relive their childhood experiences through their children. If a parent was unsuccessful at a sport and their child excels in this sport they might experience the feeling of success they never could as a child.

Research by Brummelman found parents who see themselves in their child want their child to fulfill their unfulfilled ambitions. This may cause parents to pressure their child to succeed and parents to become angry when their child makes mistakes during the game. If the parent

feels their child isn’t getting enough playtime they may become angry at the coach as was the case with the Braintree coach.

Unrealistic Parent Expectations: Parents can hold unrealistic expectations about their child’s abilities while playing sports. A parent may consider their child to be the best on the team or think their child will be a professional athlete one day. This viewpoint can cause conflicts between the parent and the coach.

Parent Reminders • Most coaches volunteer or are paid a small stipend. The coach is usually interested in helping your child and their team have a positive experience.

• When you are on the sidelines, refrain from criticizing the coach or players. Your role should be to support the team.

• If you have an issue with another parent or coach speak to the person directly about it and refrain from using social media to air your grievances.

• Before speaking to the coach allow yourself time to calm down by waiting 24 hours after the incident. Also, schedule a time to meet with the coach instead of trying to speak with the coach after the game.

• Playing on a sports team should be a fun experience for your child and the coach.

• Try to put things in perspective and remind yourself this game is for your child, not you.

• When you get angry at the coach you are ultimately hurting your child by

causing embarrassment and resentment.

Research by Omli & Wiese-Bjornstal found kids prefer supportive parents rather than angry ones at sporting events.

• There is no “I” in the team. A coach tries to make decisions based on what is best for the team not only your child.

• When you tell your child what to do from the sideline, you are implying they don’t know how to play the game.

• If you tend to get angry easily, practice anger management techniques such as deep breathing, or counting to 10.

What Can You do to Prevent Your Coach from Quitting?

• If a parent complains to you about the coach, encourage the parent to discuss it directly with the coach.

• Be respectful of the coach.

• Offer to assist or help out with practices or communication with parents.

• Praise the coach when he/she is doing a good job.

• Show gratitude for the coach. A simple thank you can mean a lot.

Cheryl Maguire holds a Master of Counseling Psychology degree. She married and is the mother of twins and a daughter.

Her writing has been published in The New York Times, Parents Magazine, Upworthy, Chicken Soup for the Soul: Count Your Blessings and Twins Magazine. You can find her on Twitter @CherylMaguire05

THE ENRICHMENT ISSUE

Keeping the Fun in Children’s Sports

BY AMANDA COLLINS BERNIER

W

e all know the saying: “It’s not about whether you win or lose, it’s about how you play the game.” But when it comes to sports for children, the nation’s top pediatricians say it’s really about how much fun kids have along the way.

A new clinical report on organized sports from the American Academy of Pediatrics outlines the plethora of benefits they offer children and teens -- from acquiring motor skills and social skills, to developing a positive self-image -- but ultimately underscores the importance of fun. When children have fun playing sports, they are more likely to remain involved in athletic programs and stay physically active throughout childhood, realizing lifelong health benefits for the developing body, brain and selfworth.

With the release of the clinical report the June issue of Pediatrics, the AAP updated their recommendations for families and communities that urge an emphasis on enjoyment of sports -- instead of winning -- as the ultimate goal. But especially in younger children, all of this should spring from the child’s desire to get out there and play.

“The interest should start with the child, not the parent,” said Kelsey Logan, MD, an author of the clinical report by the AAP Council on Sports Medicine and Fitness. “If we offer children a variety of sports for all skill levels, they are more likely to try new activities and stick with ones they enjoy.”

Most children are ready to play organized sports at about age 6, according to AAP. Before that, young children should

Fun matters!

Kids say FUN is the #1 reason they like organized sports. Keep it fun, so they'll want to keep playing.

Schools matter!

70%

70% of preschools & elementary schools offer physical education classes. These keep kids active & involved in sports longer. Plus they’re fun!

Asking questions matters!

When choosing a sports program for your child, ask about hiring procedures, codes of conduct & communication between coaches & athletes.

Coaches matter!

25%

25% of athletes report emotional abuse by coaches. Treating athletes with respect keeps them playing longer.

6 Age matters!

Most kids are ready for organized sports around age 6.

Until then, give young kids free play, every day!

sports, so they can figure out what they find enjoyable,” Dr. Logan said. “Ideally, there is an activity for everyone, with the focus on having fun.”

AAP also recommends: • Preschools and elementary schools can positively influence long-term participation in organized sports, physical activity and cardiovascular health.

• Junior high and high schools should offer multiple levels of sports play, which will help retain athletes who cannot or do not want to compete at very high levels.

• Children from lower socioeconomic backgrounds may face obstacles such as a lack of transportation to participate in activities. Community groups

can help by identifying those needs and finding ways to support families and provide sports opportunities.

• Parent support should be general and positive. Forcing sports participation is not likely to help the child achieve long-term benefits.

• Parents are encouraged to ask questions about sports programs to ensure a safe environment, including questions about hiring procedures, codes of conduct and communication between coach and athlete.

• Coaches who view organized sports with a respectful, development- and fun-focused approach are more likely to have athletes who enjoy and stay in sports.

Variety matters!

Over 30% of teens drop out of sports. Schools can keep kids playing longer by offering a variety of sports & levels of play.

30%

Parents matter!

Kids play sports longer when parents give positive support. Keep the focus on fun, not just winning.

Attitude matters!

This includes parents, coaches & athletes.

Keep it positive to avoid burnout and dropout.

from the American Academy of Pediatrics

spend an ample amount of time daily in free play. Running, leaping and climbing are examples of free play that help children develop motor skills needed for organized sports participation.

“Young athletes typically learn skills and values that they can use in everyday life,” said Steven Cuff, MD, FAAP, co-author of the report. “The camaraderie and teamwork needed on a playing field offers lasting lessons on personal responsibility, sportsmanship, goal-setting and emotional control.”

For older children and teens, the report notes that participation in school-sponsored organized sports, relative to the entire student body, is low.

They encourage schools to offer multiple levels of play at the junior high and high school levels, thereby retaining those athletes who do not desire to or cannot compete at high levels but want to remain involved in sports.

Parents are also key in kids’ participation in organized sports. Parental encouragement and a focus on fun and progress instead of winning are important influencers of whether a child enjoys and continues organized sports. Forcing organized sports participation is not likely to have long-term benefits, the report says.

“Families can help by encouraging children to ‘sample’ BAYSTATEPARENT 39

THE ENRICHMENT ISSUE

Clutter-Free Ways to Save

Your Child’s Artwork T

ArtKive

atrkiveapp.com What it is: This company offers a couple different options. With the ArtKive mobile app or through the website, you take and upload photos of your child’s artwork which you can organize by child and age. You can also drop in additional information such as a title or a description of the artwork. With the other option, ArtKive Box, you’ll receive a box to send in the artwork, which the company will professionally photograph. You have the option of having the artwork sent back to you, if you’d like.

Once you upload at least 20 images, you can turn your child’s artwork into a hardcover book. You can choose up to 200 images to print.

Price: Your first 40 photos are free to store on the app, but after that, membership is ranges from $3-$13 per month.

A $39 fee is charged initially for the box service, and a second fee is charged depending on how much artwork you send in. Printed books range from $25-$155.

Keepy

keepy.me What it is: This app allows you to save photos and videos of your children’s artwork, letters, photos, and mementos digitally. It even allows your little ones to add voice and video narration to their creations. You can organize your uploads by child in an ordered, private timeline. You can also invite friends and family to become a “fan” so they can see your memories on their device. Keepy encourages users to think beyond the artwork box as the app can be used to archive all sorts of moments and events from your child’s life. The Keepy Store has a wide variety of merchandise to such as printed canvases, photo books, magnets, coasters and more.

Price: You can store limited uploads for free, or unlimited keepies for $7.99 per month or $45.99 per year.

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hat first finger painting is nothing short of magical.

The speckles and splatters, their choice of color, those perfect smudges and smears - you burst with pride, sure that you’ve got a pint-sized Picasso on your hands. On the fridge it goes.

Then the next day it’s a crayon drawing. The next week it’s a gluey mosaic. And before you know it you’re out of space on the fridge, and up to your ears in your kid’s artwork. What do you do with it all? Are you a monster if you consider throwing it away? How do you choose what to save, and where on earth will you put it all?

Luckily, there are several clutter-free ways to hold on to your child’s artwork. From digital storage and sharing option to ways to turn those masterpieces in books, pillows, puzzles and more. Here’s nine of our favorite creative ways to keep your kids artwork -- without drowning in it.

Artsonia

artsonia.com What it is: Artsonia is an online “museum” where teachers or parents can create online art galleries for their students and kids. The Artsonia app lets you take photos of your child’s artwork and upload the images to an online art gallery on Artsonia.com. Images can be cropped and rotated and the brightness can be tweaked.

Once the artwork is published online, children can enter contests and family members can leave comments.

Artsonia has a gift shop with a variety of keepsakes you can customize with your child’s creations. Coffee mugs, t-shirts and phone cases are just a few of the options.

Price: Free

Shutterfly Mini Masterpieces

shutterfly.com What it is: Shutterfly allows you to put a photo on virtually anything, but their Mini Masterpieces photo book is designed specifically for children’s artwork. Take photos of the artwork and upload them to the Shutterfly site to create the book, which has predesigned photo layouts, title placement and even journaling prompts. You can feature a picture of and include an artist bio. There are even specially designed pages to trace handprints or add more art to this very special photo book after it’s been received. You can choose from a variety of sizes, pages, and covers.

Price: $15.99-$139.99

Canvsly

canvsly.com What it is: Cavasly is a mobile app to which you can upload, save and share pictures you’ve snapped of your kids’ masterpieces. You can organize by child and then by theme (for example schoolwork, crafts, etc.) Groups of parents can privately communicate and share their children’s artwork in Circles. There is also an option to share pictures and details of child handcrafts on all major social networking platforms such as Facebook and Twitter. The app has a store to purchase things like photo books, mugs and shirts printed with your child’s artwork.

Price: A subscription is $2.99 per month or $9.99 per year.

Rocketbook Color Notebook

getrocketbook.com What it is: This notebook brings the time-honored drawing experience to the mobile generation. Instead of on piles of loose papers, have your kids create colorful drawings with crayons, markers and colored pencils in the notebook, then instantly send or save them using a mobile device and the Rocketbook App. The Color works with the entire Crayola line of dry-erase products, but many other brands work, too.

Price: $22

Plum Print

plumprint.com What it is: Fill up a prepaid box with your artwork and send it off to Plum Print to be digitized and turned into a hardcover or softcover photo book. From there, you can order other keepsakes like throw pillows, notecards -- even ottoman poufs and shower curtains! The really cool thing about Plum Print is you’re not limited to 2D art.

You can fill the box with anything that fits -- 3-D sculptures, rolled up murals, popsicle stick crafts, pipe cleaner creations, macaroni necklaces. It’s all fair game! You can have all the artwork sent back to you, if you choose.

Price: A $39.99 deposit for the prepaid box is deducted from the cost of your book, which for ten pieces of art ranges from $84-$130.

Crayon Creatures

crayoncreatures. com.

What it is: Send in a photo of your child’s artwork and this service will turn it into a sandstone figurine.

The company brings to life the kid’s artwork by modeling a digital object and turning it into a real thing using 3D printing technology, designed and produced with photo-realistic color to maintain the energy and attitude of children’s expressive drawings. These are intended to be decorative keepsakes, not toys.

Price: $199

Budsies

budsies.com What it is: Turn any art into a huggable, plush stuffed animal! Budsies are beautiful custom-sewn stuffed animals created from any drawing or photo. The stuffed animals are handmade to look just like the drawing you submit, from custom anime characters to adorable doodles.

Price: $89-$199 BAYSTATEPARENT 41

THE ENRICHMENT ISSUE

How Do I Know When My Child Needs Outside Academic Help?

BY TODD BLECHNER, NEXT LEVEL UP TUTORING FOUNDER/OWNER he age old saying, “there is no better time than the present,” applies perfectly to the question of whether you should get your child outside academic help, such as a tutor, academic coach, online tutoring, or have him or her attend a tutoring center. Every child, regardless of their age or how successful they are in school, could benefit from the continuity of meeting with a professional academic coach or tutor dedicated to their scholastic improvement. Since there are innumerable facets to deal with, factors to consider, and dynamics to work through, all of today’s students typically have at least one school-related area that could use improvement.

I want to share one tip right away.

If you have a concern about how your child is performing in school, and you are considering getting him or her outside academic help, it is a good idea to move forward with the extra support immediately. Being proactive will pay dividends.

The longer you wait, the more bad habits will linger.

In my own experience, I’ve had parents come to me in April or May frustrated with their child’s lack of success in school. When I start to ask questions about their child and learn more about the individual’s academic situation, I

T

42 SEPTEMBER2019

typically discover that the concerns began back in October. They invariably feel a sense of guilt that they waited too long and that the chance for a successful school year may have been lost. With this in mind, do not let those critical, early months of the school year slip by without addressing your concerns. The earlier that you acknowledge that your child is struggling, the easier it will be to correct the areas of concern, and the better off your child will be for the remainder of the school year and beyond.

Many parents often wonder exactly what they should look for when assessing whether their children need extra academic support or not. There are the obvious indicators like poor grades, missing assignments, behavior issues, emails from the teacher, and lack of attendance.

Other signs to look for may not be as obvious. Perhaps they used to love going to school, and now they find it a chore or even seem a little anxious every morning.

I know students that excelled in elementary school only to struggle when they got to middle school, and middle school students that had incredible success up until they started freshman year of high school.

These types of scenarios should not be ignored. Whatever is happening can fester and become a more serious problem. Your child’s love for school is not lost, but just misplaced, and a good academic coach can bring it back.

There are myriad dynamics to consider when assessing a child’s academic needs, especially in today’s society and today’s schools. Authentic teacher’s comments on progress reports can give you insight and the opportunity to catch any issues, but typically they are not immediate enough.

Additionally, many students “fall through the cracks” and hardly receive words of concern or encouragement from their teachers. The warning signs that these children might present are more inconspicuous, such as not using a system to record their homework or messy, unorganized binders and backpacks. Or, perhaps you see them complete a homework assignment, but for some reason they don’t bother to turn it in or submit it through their school’s online portal system.

Here is another important issue to consider that is on the rise. A startling fact, according to Richard Freed from online news site Medium, is that a child in America spends an average of between five to eight hours per day on their devices for entertainment compared to only 16 minutes for schoolwork. Video games and social media have become all consuming for students who have a cell phone or tablet. If your child was doing well in school, but that changed when you allowed them to have their own device, then it is up to you to start setting boundaries or ban them altogether. In my own experience,

once a cell phone or tablet is introduced into a child’s life, the student begins to care less about school and priorities start to shift. This is especially true if they spend more time on the device for entertainment versus academics.

The bottom line? Pay attention to how your child is doing in school, and be aware of the obvious signs, as well as any subtle changes taking place. Sometimes issues start small, and left unchecked, could easily grow for years. Don’t ignore what your gut is telling you. You know your child best, and will notice any changes in your child before anyone else will.

As parents, we are the first line of defense when it comes to noticing the signs our children exhibit when they are struggling in school. Most students won’t ask for help when they are struggling or request structure to help guide them, but they will definitely benefit from it and appreciate it when they are older.

Todd Blechner has been an educator for more than 20 years and is the founder and owner of Next Level Up Tutoring, a comprehensive academic coaching and tutoring organization. He is the father of three and lives in Holden. Todd is a firm believer in a whole-child, student-centered approach to teaching and tutoring. He believes that every student can be reached regardless of age, gender, background or learning style.

BAYSTATEPARENT 43

finally

forever

What if?

How Two Words Kept Three Siblings Together

T

he Massachusetts Adoption Resource Exchange (MARE), a nonprofit helps waiting children in foster care find permanent homes, takes particular interest in helping with harder to place children, such as teenagers, those with emotional, physical, and intellectual challenges, and sibling groups. Sibling groups from foster care are some of the most difficult children to place with prospective adoptive families. Unfortunately, it is not always possible to keep the siblings together, despite the best of efforts.

But one family was able to defy the odds and keep a group of three siblings care together, even after they had been residing in three separate foster homes. It all began when a woman asked herself two little words.

At the time, Amy had been working at an afterschool program where she met many foster children. One day, she was struck when a young girl told her that she was not sure

44 SEPTEMBER2019

who was picking her up after the program -- her then foster mother, or her adoption worker. More so, she was not sure where she would even be spending the rest of her day.

“It broke my heart,” Amy said. “I knew her current foster mom was not going to be fostering anymore. I didn’t know she was on the adoption track at the time.”

Amy felt a tug at her heart.

Her first reaction after hearing that this child didn’t know where she would be going was of adopting her. She knew it would not be simple, but there was a possibility. So, she asked her husband, “What if?”

After sleeping on it, Amy and her husband knew it was something they wanted to pursue.

With four adult kids out of the house, they had the space in their home and in their hearts for this young girl. The next morning, Amy called the adoption worker, and a few months later, their future daughter would move into their home.

During the time between the first inquiry and her moving in, Amy began making a stronger

effort to get to know the girl.

She was a reserved and quiet girl, but Amy kept trying. She asked her lots of questions and did what she could to make her feel comfortable.

Eventually, her efforts paid off when the child asked, “Can I live with you?” without even knowing that Amy and her husband were trying to make that happen.

“I wanted to make it an easier transition for her,” said Amy. “So, the day she came to my house… it was a different flow than most foster kids since she already knew me.”

While inquiring about the child, Amy had learned that she also had two brothers in foster care who were a little bit older and also free for adoption. Amy tried to plan visits for the young girl with her brothers but it proved challenging to schedule times with the other foster families. Soon, they started just picking up the brothers from time to time so they could see their sister.

Quickly, it became clear how close these siblings were.

“These three kids were so

bonded,” Amy said. “We could see the joy in her face when they were together, we could see the joy in the boys’ faces when they were together.”

Soon enough, Amy and her husband fell in love with the boys, and hated that the three children were living apart. But as much as they wanted to take them in, there just didn’t seem to be enough room in their house.

“He just couldn’t let it go,” Amy said about her husband.

Again they asked, what if?

So, after a little dreaming and planning, the couple began construction on their house to create an additional room for their growing family. They were hopeful, but not certain everything would work out, so they kept their plan a secret from the children.

“It’s all they wanted. They didn’t care where they lived, who they lived with, as long as they were together. And, that’s what they would say, ‘we just want to be together.’”

One year after the young girl moved in, the boys moved in at last. And, about one year

after this, their Adoption Day arrived and they were officially a family.

Amy said she felt deeply supported by the DCF workers she interacted with and encountered throughout the adoption process. In fact, she still sends pictures and updates on the children to their adoption workers. She was also blown away by the support she received in her local community.

“I’ve had people come up to me with tears in their eyes, saying ‘thank you so much, I know what it was like, I was in the system,’” Amy said.

Of course, with anything, there are challenges. For Amy, the biggest struggle was waiting and being patient.

Adoption is never a quick process. Though her journey to her three children was quicker than some, patience to get the adoption finalized was a huge hurdle to overcome.

Amy offered some advice for prospective adoptive families: build relationships.

“Connections. Definitely connections. Find people to

talk to. Put your questions out there; no question is stupid, I promise. Find your resources, put your questions out there and keep the kids connected if they have siblings,” she said.

She also said patience is key -- not just when waiting for the finalization of an adoption, but also with children who have been in foster care. “They’ve all been through a trauma,” she said. “They’ve been through something we may never understand and we have to be patient with the child.”

There are over 1,100 children waiting to be placed in permanent homes. MARE provides many resources for anyone 18 and older, single, partnered, LGBTQ+, homeowners or renters, who is looking to adopt.

There are no fees to adopt a child from foster care, and families of various levels of income can adopt, as long as there is a stable form of income to provide for a child. MARE’s main goal is to find a home for every child and teen in foster care awaiting adoption.

September’s Child: Meet Bailey Hi, my name is Bailey and I enjoy spending time with animals!

Bailey is a kind and creative 11-yearold girl of Caucasian descent. Bailey has many interests and hobbies such as playing outside, swimming, cooking and baking. She also enjoys playing imaginative games with her stuffed animals and dolls. She will often ask others to compete in a game of Uno, Candyland or Connect Four with her. She is a competitive, playful child who is always willing to try new games and activities. Animals are also very important to Bailey and she enjoys going to farms to visit and interact with different types of animals.

Bailey is very eager to have good relationships with adults and peers in her life. She puts in a lot of effort and energy into forming positive relationships. In the school setting, Bailey has been able to create and maintain friendships with several peers in her classroom. She is currently in the fifth grade.

Bailey has identified that she wants to be an only child in a family that will love her and keep her safe. She would also like to be in a family that has pets and shares her

love for ravioli! Bailey’s team would love to see her placed in an active two parent family that has a strong support system, and very involved in their community. Bailey’s future family should be willing to engage in services and maintain contact/visits with her birth parents and siblings.

Can you provide the guidance, love and stability that a child needs? If you’re at least 18 years old, have a stable source of income, and room in your heart, you may be a perfect match to adopt a waiting child. Adoptive parents can be single, married, or partnered; experienced or not; renters or homeowners; LGBTQ singles and couples.

The process to adopt a child from foster care requires training, interviews, and home visits to determine if adoption is right for you, and if so, to help connect you with a child or sibling group that your family will be a good match for.

To learn more about adoption from foster care, call the Massachusetts Adoption Resource Exchange (MARE) at 617-964-6273 or visit www.mareinc.org.

BAYSTATEPARENT 45

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46 SEPTEMBER2019

take eight

with the Pineapple Project’s Becca & Mal Can boys be princesses? Could Batman wear a tutu? It’s questions like these that led actors Mal Malme and Becca Lewis, along with colleague Renee Farster-Degenhardt, to create the Pineapple Project, an original play about gender, creativity, and each child’s freedom to be who they are. The theater piece, which they perform at libraries, schools, and conferences throughout Greater Boston and New England, is broadening the gender conversation and helping children know it’s OK to just be themselves.

1.

2.

What’s your background in theater arts?

Becca discovered theater in high school and went to the University of Memphis where she received her BFA. She has been working as a professional actor in Boston since 2002. Mal has been a theater artist in Boston for over 20 years, and is co-founder of Queer Soup Theater. Mal also serves on the Board of StageSource, New England’s theatre resource and advocacy organization, and is also a professional healthcare clown with the Laughter League at Boston Children’s and Hasbro Children’s Hospitals.

Tell us about the Pineapple Project? What’s the gist of the show?

It is an interactive show for kids that celebrates gender diversity. Its message is one of empowerment, to give every child the confidence to be who they are and express themselves how they want.

3.

for The Pineapple Project came out of this moment during play between Mal and Mal’s niece. As a nonbinary person and theatre artist, Mal knew that this moment could not go by without recognizing how early in a child’s development, ideas and influences can form around gender. And with years of experience working with LGBTQ youth who struggle with their gender, we felt it was time to create a theater piece that could help broaden the conversation as well as advocate for and validate each child’s individual freedom to be who they are.

What was the catalyst for creating this show?

“Boys can’t be princesses!”

The impetus

4.

boxes are important for safety such as stove = fire = bad = dangerous. Unfortunately, gender often gets wrapped into this stage of development and some kids get the message that girls = dresses = dolls = not for boys ever. Our show works to open up those gender boxes so that all the options can be for all the kids. If you’re into something, be into it! If something makes you happy, do it!

5.

What do you hope children take away from the show? What about adults?

With theater, representation is so important. We hope kids will see themselves on stage and walk away feeling empowered to be who they are. Adults too! We’ve had caregivers approach us after the show thanking us for some of the language modeled in our talkbacks, ways that we can be more inclusive. We’ve also had adults tell us that they didn’t realize they were being so gendered in their choice of play and that they were happy to be able to recognize that bias.

The Pineapple Project is geared to ages 3-8. Is there a reason you targeted this age group?

Children between the ages of 3-8 have this window where they’re trying to make sense of the world by putting things into boxes. Some

6.

What’s been most surprising to you as you’ve performed this show?

We once had a group of 100 kindergarteners begin to chant, “Believe in yourself! Believe in yourself!” midway through our show. It was beautiful.

there a child’s reaction or revelation that out to you?

7. Isstands

We had a kid who crowned himself the Pineapple King at a show. We also had a kid see the show a couple years ago and then come back using different pronouns this past year. We have a family that comes to see the show every time we’re at their local library. They’ve seen it so many times, they could probably perform it better than us at this point!

8.

What’s the future of the Pineapple Project? What’s your hope for where it will go?

We’d love to keep broadening our audience. A dream is to be able to figure out funding for a tour outside of the Greater Boston area. We’re very curious how audiences in different parts of the country would respond. And what we could learn from those conversations that would inspire us to not only keep it fresh but potentially develop new material down the road.

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48 SEPTEMBER2019