Family Connections Spring 2012

FamilyConnections The BC Council for Families Magazine Spring 2012

 the newcomer issue  playing in a multicultural world

pg. 8

Ten Reasons to Love the Parent-Child Mother Goose Program pg. 12

parent activity: my family of origin pg. 5

A Delicate Balance: Work and Family

pg. 19

Council for Families

FamilyConnections

editor Tina Albrecht art director & design Tina Albrecht and Ana-Maria Enescu contributors Beth Hutchinson, Marilee Peters, Cara Hykawy, Maya Goldstein, Janene Swalwell subscriptions By membership with the BC Council for Families. www.bccf.ca Family Connections is published four times per year by the BC Council for Families.

Opinions expressed are those of the authors and not necessarily those of the Council, its members or funders. #208 – 1600 West 6th Ave Vancouver, bc v6J 1R3 t 604 678 8884 e editor@bccf.ca www.bccf.ca Established in 1977, the BC Council for Families is a registered non-profit society.

Registration #0488189-09-28 issn#1195-9428 officers of the society Sylvia Tremblay · President Paula Cayley · Vice President Marilee Peters · Acting Executive Director board of directors Gail Brown · Interior Connie Canam · Vancouver Coastal Paula Cayley · Vancouver Coastal Bella Cenezero · Fraser Deb Day · Island Tim Fairgrieve · Vancouver Coastal Kathy Kendall · Interior Lynn Locher · North John Thornburn · Fraser Katie Tichauer · Vancouver Coastal Sylvia Tremblay · Fraser Bev Wice · Interior Victor Zhou · Vancouver Coastal © 2012 BC Council for Families

2 Family Connections Spring 2012

volume 16, issue 1 spring 2012

Focus 8 Play in a Multicultural World A recent graduate study unpacks the many – faceted impact of culture on play.

Maya Goldstein 12 Ten Reasons to Love the Parent-Child Mother Goose Program Oh Mother Goose, how do we love thee? Let us count the ways…

Janene Swalwell

Departments 3 From the Editor’s Desk 4 News & Notes From the family squeeze to the news you need… with a musical Mother Goose interlude.

5 Toolbox Activity for working with parents: My Family of Origin 6 Connections Profile: Rishima Bahadoorsingh Newcomer Children’s Champion 17 Good to Know Challenge and Change: Adjusting to life in Canada 18 Balancing Act Changing Family Dynamics – a frequent reality for newcomer families.

19 The Final Word Achieving work – family balance – it's a global challenge that can't be ignored.

From the Editor’s Desk

Celebrating family diversity is implications of this research to practical central to the BC Council for approaches by family resource workers Families’ support and advocacy and other service providers to families efforts for families, so I’m very pleased with young children. to welcome you to this issue of Family Connections examining the topic of How we think about families, and diversity. Of course, family diversity isn’t communities, influences the kinds of just about cultural, ethnic, or linguistic services and resources we make available differences – when we talk about to support families and to promote supporting family diversity, we’re also community engagement. Parent-Child talking about the many different forms that Mother Goose is a program that has for families can take. From mom-dad-andmany years helped parents all across two-kids, to grandmother-and-grandkids, Canada to develop a secure attachment to adult siblings, to elderly parent and with their young children, and to create child, to a group of lifelong friends, what sustaining relationships with others in their each of us calls “family” is as unique and community that are so fundamental to personal as we are ourselves. healthy, happy parenting and family life.

We’re delighted to share Janene Swalwell’s 10 Reasons to Love the Parent-Child Mother The notion of family has always eluded Goose Program on page 12 in this issue. easy definition, but here’s a good working definition: “family is who you love”. Who supports you, who sustains you, who do As well, we're very grateful to amssa, the you turn to in crisis – and who, in turn, Affiliation of Multicultural Societies and are you there for in time of need? Looked Service Agencies of BC, for their permission at in those terms, the idea of family to reprint the article Newcomer Families becomes much bigger, and much more Experience Changing Family Dynamics, meaningful, than simply the members of from the Newcomer Children Information your household or your genealogical tree.

Exchange Bulletin. It's a great overview of the changes many families experience in In Canada, and in North America today their first years in a new country. generally, we’re apt to think of family in pretty narrow terms – parents raising Thanks for reading. As always, if you have children. For newcomers from parts of the comments, questions, or suggestions about world where family is a more inclusive anything you read in Family Connections, concept, adapting to that reality can be just drop me a line at editor@bccf.ca. one of the biggest challenges they are faced with as they adjust to life in Canada.

Maya Goldstein, in her article Play in a Multicultural World on page 8 of this issue, looks at some of the differences in Tina Albrecht, Editor approaches to play among parents who are relative newcomers, and reflects on the

Spring 2012 Family Connections 3

News & Notes

Andrea, parent featured in the Parent-Child Mother Goose Program video.

Fresh Squeezed… Families What’s the reality for families today? Many dual income families can hardly make ends meet, child care costs can mount as high as mortgage payments, and pressure to perform at work is leaving parents with little time and less energy to spend with their kids. All across Canada, parents with young children are experiencing what Dr. Paul Kershaw of the University of British Columbia calls a “generation squeeze”. Earlier this year, as part of our monthly podcast interview series Voices of Family, BC Council for Families’ Acting Executive Director Marilee Peters sat down with Kershaw to discuss what needs to happen in order to re-create a Canada that works for young families.

“Either we accept that we have a generation of parents today that are just worse or we recognize that around us, things have changed dramatically and we as a country haven’t adapted,” insists Kershaw.

“It has become harder to raise a family in this country than it was a generation ago. It is not just you if you’re feeling time squeezed or income squeezed or service squeezed, that is not your personal failing! That it is because we have this environment around us which has changed so much but we have not adapted as a society. And while it has become harder to raise a family, it has become easier – not easy, but easier – to retire.”

According to a recent national poll, Canadians want to make family a priority: 85% want to spend more time with their families and 60% want governments to support policy changes that make it easier to raise a family.

And Canadians are willing to make hard choices to pay for programs and services for families, including rethinking sacred cows like medical care. When asked specifically about reallocating spending increases from medical care and investing it in family policy measures, 42% agreed it was a ‘good idea’.

4 Family Connections Spring 2012

Says Kershaw, “we have some really serious things happening in front of us and we have to prevent them before they get out of control. So that means that all Canadians, of all age groups, need to look in the mirror and say “What kind of Canada do I want?”...

[We need to] stop blaming ourselves, start speaking out, [and] get better informed.”

Find the full audio interview online at: http://www.bccf.ca/voices-family.

Singing, Rhyming and Strengthening Families Silly rhymes, funny songs and stories, giggling babies, making new friends with other parents and caregivers – there’s so much to love about a Parent-Child Mother Goose group!

In the midst of all the fun, it can be easy to overlook the important learning and other key benefits that result from participation in Parent-Child Mother Goose programs. Easy, that is, unless you’re a Parent-Child Mother Goose teacher, and have the first-hand experience of the dramatic difference that participation in a Mother Goose group can make for struggling parents and children.

Our new video, Singing, Rhyming and Strengthening Families, released online in April, captures both the joy and the longterm benefits that Parent-Child Mother Goose brings to participating families. You’ll hear from program teachers and parents at the I Hope Family Centre in North Vancouver about their experiences with the program, and why they keep coming back to ParentChild Mother Goose.

Parent-Child Mother Goose enhances children’s language development, preliteracy and cognitive skills, builds confidence and self-esteem, develops social skills and increases the bond between parent and child.

Sharing the video with parents is a great way to help families learn more about the Parent-

Child Mother Goose program.

A very special thank you to the teachers and families who took part. Find it online at: www.bccf.ca

Roundups: The Family Sector News You Need How do you cope with information overload?

One useful strategy is to store the information you need somewhere you can easily retrieve it when necessary. Now, the BC Council for Families is helping you to get the info you need, when you need it.

Our new bi-monthly enewsletters for program facilitators and service providers in Home Visiting, Young Parent Programs, Nobody’s Perfect and My Tween and Me are the perfect solution to modern-day data doldrums. Can’t remember the date of the next professional development workshop, or the details of a recent research study? Our Roundup enewsletters put it all together for you in one easy to read package.

A collection of news items, blog posts, tweets, and new online resources specifically relevant to your professional needs, each Roundup comes to your inbox an easilymanageable six times per year. It’s part of our commitment to making sure that everyone in BC working with, or for, families has easy access to the most up-to-date information and resources on issues affecting families.

The Roundup is also your chance to stay connected to others working with young parents in BC. Each issue, we’ll profile family professionals and programs from around BC helping you stay current on what’s happening for parents and kids in our province. Want to share news from your program? Let us know, and we’ll include it in our next issue.

Stay tuned! Find out more by contacting us at: bccf@bccf.ca

Toolbox

pa r e n t a c t i v i t y:

My Family of Origin

An individual’s family of origin can be a major influence on their interactions with partners, or family members. The habits, experiences, and perceptions that were formed while growing up, are not easy to shake. They can affect people’s relationships for the rest of their lives.

Many different things are learned from one’s family of origin.

And many newcomers to Canada have learned different ways of communication and interaction in their original culture, than what is perhaps the norm in this one.

It can be helpful for families who immigrate to Canada to reflect on the experiences they had while being raised in their family of origin’s culture, and to examine the cultural differences that their children may be facing, growing up in a new country. This activity can help parents to decide which elements from their old culture that they would like to pass on to their children, and assist them in realizing that it is important to be sensitive to their new culture as well.

key points  Past family experiences influence parenting styles and family relationships. Reflecting on parents’ own experiences can help them understand the effect of family experiences on their children.

Relationships with siblings and extended family members can profoundly influence children’s attitudes and behaviours related to risky behaviours. materials: • Blank paper and markers directions 1 Provide blank paper and markers for each parent in the group. Ask parents to think back to their own childhood family. Invite them to draw an image that represents a strong positive feeling about their own childhood family experience and an image that represents a negative experience. Encourage them to use colours and shapes more than words to express their memories and feelings.

2 Ask parents to find a sharing partner or stay in a full group. Ask parents to share their drawing and identify what they would want to pass on to their own children from their childhood family experiences and what they would want to avoid.

3 After several minutes of partner exchange, invite parents to share their reflections with the larger group.

do you have an activity that you often use with families? To contribute an activity, contact us at editor@bccf.ca

Spring 2012 Family Connections 5

Connections

Profile: Rishima Bahadoorsingh Newcomer Children’s Champion

Children who have newly immigrated to fc: How many newcomer children are in BC? to be only read, or not understand what a Canada, or “newcomer children” are a diverse rb: 90,155 new immigrants to Canada are bell meant. Some teachers looked at this as a group with a varied set of needs. Challenges under the age of five, and 193,535 are behaviour problem and it was treated as thus. such as adaption and integration into a new between 5 – 14 years old. (2006 Census, However after understanding that this was society, learning English as a second language, Statistics Canada). In BC, there are 349,518 partly due to her lack of exposure to a school and succeeding in an educational system students registered in the K-7 system, of setting, not bad behaviour, it was easier to that is often culturally strange to them, which 52,832 (or 15.1%) are designated as help her understand her new environment. are just some of the hurdles that these ESL. (Student Statistics, 2009/2010 Provincial children face. Rishima Bahadoorsingh is an and District Reports – Public and Independent fc: What are the main challenges newcomer elementary school teacher who addresses Schools Combined. Ministry of Education). children face? And what are their strengths? these issues in her daily work. Rishima rb: Family structure can be affected during began working as the Newcomer Children’s fc: Why do you believe that work with the settlement and integration process. Family Champion at Affiliation of Multicultural newcomer children is so important? Are members can be separated and it can cause Societies and Services Agencies (amssa) there any aspects of this work that are a loss of attachment between children and in 2009. She was drawn to the position by particularly challenging? parents and disrupt family dynamics. The the opportunity to support the struggles of rb: It is often assumed that children adapt social and economic status of a family can newcomer children that she has personally more quickly to change than adults. However change when they relocate to a different observed within her own classroom. The newcomer children may face complex and country. As a result, the parents may be Newcomer Children’s Champion program conflicting emotions. For some newcomer unable to offer a full connection to their enabled Rishima to discover the barriers and children, the immigration process represents children because of the demands placed on risks some newcomer children face while an easy transition but for others, it can be an them to learn English, get a job, and integrate settling in Canada and it has allowed her to uphill battle. Many newcomer children require into the community. Also, children generally explore real solutions from front line workers specialized supports to help them in their learn English faster than their parents and and then to support those working with transition to a new country. often have increased responsibility as they newcomer children through networking, The main challenge I find, is for people assume the role of language and cultural research, and resources. Because she working with children to understand that interpreter for the family in daily activities. immigrated to Canada from Port of Spain, newcomer children do have special needs English language proficiency contributes Trinidad, when she was only four years old, that have to be addressed. For example, I to many other challenge that newcomer Rishima has experienced first-hand what it is had a student from a refugee camp. When she families face such as navigating the various like to be a newcomer child to Canada. first came she knew no English and had little health, support, and education systems. schooling. She first arrived confused and a Children in the BC education system receive family connections: How do you define a bit scared. She was often alone at recess and five years of ESL support. On average it takes newcomer child in Canada? lunch and could not make any friends due to a newcomer child two years to develop rishima bahadoorsingh: The term her lack of communication skills. She would social English language communication skills, “Newcomer children” is used to describe accidentally write on the blackboard with and six to eight years to achieve literacy children ages 0 to 12, born abroad or in Canada, permanent marker, not understanding that it and verbal fluency in academic English for and with one or both parents having only uses chalk, she would scribble in books secondary school. The rate of language immigrant, refugee or temporary resident status. not knowing that some books were meant acquisition depends on a number of factors, 6 Family Connections Spring 2012

It is often assumed that children adapt more quickly to change than adults. However, newcomer children may face complex and conflicting emotions.

including the child’s literacy in their native early years, there is a spike in vulnerability language, previous schooling experience, around grade four. At this age the curriculum their country of origin’s educational structure, starts to focus more on academics and and family support. Language proficiency is educators often see a drop in performance a key indicator for the success of newcomer for newcomer children. This is likely related children in school. to a child’s ability to understand the lessons Mental health concerns such as anxiety, as they shift focus from “learning to read” to depression, and post traumatic stress “reading to learn". However, with support disorder can occur when people move to a services, and specialized teacher supports, new country – this is particularly common newcomer children and their families do among refugees who have experienced receive the much-needed support to adapt to traumatic situations in their country of origin. a new environment. Many newcomer children Some newcomer children can have mental enter the school system with assets, such as health issues themselves, but they can also life skills and enhanced language proficiency, be impacted by the mental health of their that often goes unrecognized or that are family members. Mental health is a challenge viewed as deficiencies. An important point of for newcomer families because they are engagement with this student population is typically more isolated and have less peer and missed when these assets are not recognized community support. Furthermore, depending and valued. on their cultural norms, mental illness in the family could be viewed as culturally irrelevant, fc: Immigrant parents are dealing with many an embarrassment, or stigmatizing. issues while settling in Canada but they are In terms of schooling, The Ministry of also concerned about their children. What can Education provides block funding for school they do to support them? districts to support the English language needs rb: Parents can talk with teachers or principals of newcomer children for a maximum of five if there are any concerns academically or years per student. Some students require emotionally. There are people within the more than five years of language instruction school system such as counsellors, Settlement to become proficient in academic English.

Workers in Schools (SWIS), and multicultural Appropriate assessment tools, curriculums, liaison workers that can help support children. and resources are required to meet the Community centres and neighbourhood educational needs of newcomer children. houses also have programs that children It is often found that behavioural problems can attend to learn about Canadian norms, in school are a result of an inability to socialize, and provide support academically communicate or relate within the traditional and emotionally. classroom setting. While there are some specific challenges related to the integration and adaptation of newcomer children in the

fc: From your experience, what kind of support can teachers, family service providers and other professionals give newcomer children? rb: The following key issues were raised by immigrant settlement sector professionals as key issues to address in delivering programs and support services: • Services tend to stress individualism or independence, however, some immigrant families operate from the perspective of collectivism or interdependence with multigenerational settings.

• Families often lack awareness and understanding of the services available to help them, where these services are located in the community and the roles of the various helping professionals.

• Ensure not to stereotype cultures, as there is diversity within each cultural group. Make sure interventions meet individual needs.

• Adapt your program to respect various holidays and accommodate practices such as food restrictions. For example, some religions prohibit the consumption of pork.

• Role-play situations and use communicative and visual tools. Printed material may not be particularly effective with some newcomer families.

• Be open to learning from newcomer parents, as they know their children and cultures best.

• It is important to emphasize that there is no “best way” to raise a child. Parents need to be comfortable and consistent with the decisions they make.

Spring 2012 Family Connections 7

Focus

8 Family Connections Spring 2012

PLAY IN A MULTICULTURAL WORLD  Maya

Goldstein, ma

How do parents' interactions with children during play differ across, and within, cultures? A UBC graduate thesis examines the issue.

C

hildren are everywhere. Whether you are in Vancouver, traveling through Africa, wandering the busy streets of Mexico City, or visiting small villages in India, you will see children, and most likely they will be playing. The type of play, the characteristics of it, and the materials that the children play with, vary drastically from one place and culture to another. However, there are common basic features that unify play. Children will most likely imitate people they are close to, such as their parents or siblings, play with objects that they find handy such as bowls, sticks or dolls, smile and laugh, and their interest in play will change as they grow older.

We live in a multicultural world. Canada has one of the largest growing immigrant children populations in the world (Beiser, 1998). In the lower mainland of British Columbia you will find a high percentage of immigrants from all over the world, but especially from Asia. Therefore, early childhood facilities in the lower mainland of BC are very diverse. In one classroom you could find children from Japan, China, Iran,

India, Israel, Korea, Spain, Argentina and more, all playing together.

I came to Canada from Israel in 2006 and was fascinated by this diversity and multiculturalism. I have always been interested in immigrants and different cultural groups, so when I started my graduate studies in Vancouver, I knew that my thesis topic would focus on immigrants.

Having worked in early childhood settings, I started thinking about play, and how it is so culturally affected.

Only a few studies have been conducted regarding cultural influences on children’s play. One of the most well known of them is the Six Cultures Study conducted in six communities around the globe: Kenya, India, Mexico, the Philippines, the United States and Japan. Children played in all the communities, but the focus of the play varied, depending on variables such as whether the children were free to play outside, adult encouragement, available supplies for play, and whether the children worked or not. The U.S. was different compared with the other countries because the children there lived in

smaller families with fewer children around, did not have the freedom to go outside by themselves and spent many hours indoors (Edwards, 2000; Whiting, 1963).

I decided to focus my thesis on “parentchild play interactions in immigrant SouthAsian families” (Goldstein, 2010). As I was reading and researching the subject, I was surprised to discover that SouthAsian immigrants were often neglected in educational research even in British Columbia, where immigrants from India are one of the largest immigrant groups (BC Stats, 2001). I conducted my research in a city in the lower mainland of British Columbia, where many South Asian immigrants reside.

More specifically, it is one of the most diverse cities in Canada and has one of the largest growing populations of immigrants, especially from India, more specifically from Punjab (BC Stats, 2008).

I conducted an ethnographic study on play interactions in South-Asian families. The first phase of the study took place in a drop-in centre where many South-Asian parents and children participated. I conducted Spring 2012 Family Connections 9

Focus

Tips for Service Providers

observations on thirteen parents (12 mothers and one father) and their children between the ages 3 – 4. I looked at the type of play activities the child and/or the parents were involved in, their physical interactions and proximity, and verbal exchanges between the child and parent. In addition, I also interviewed a staff member who worked in the drop-in centre and was from the same cultural group.

The findings from the drop-in centre suggested that there were two main groups of parents. The first was the “directing parents” who stayed physically close to their children and focused on structured art activities, where certain rules are followed in order to create something like a necklace or a snowman, and toys with numbers, letters and/or colors were utilized. I called the second group “socializing parents”, since they spent most of their time socializing with each other, while the children played by themselves. The children mostly chose pretend play activities, such as playing “kitchen” or playing with tools. If the children chose art activities it was mostly “free style” art, like painting, and not a structured activity.

According to a staff member, the program supported “learning through play”, which

means encouraging parents to interact with the children in a way that the children learn while playing. The staff member suggested that many South Asian parents were not aware of the importance of play in the child’s life and focused on more traditional educational activities. At the centre, the staff encouraged the parents to teach the children the ABC’s by singing a song or by playing games.

After analyzing the findings from the first phase, I chose two families to continue the research by observing play activities and interactions in their homes. Both families had children of the same ages. The first family had a son, Jay, who was three years old, and a

“In Canada people raise their own kids, but in India other people raise your kids.” daughter who was one year old. The second family had a daughter, Dalbir, who was three, and a son who was one. Both families were fairly new to Canada and did not have their extended families with them. I observed them in their homes and took notes of what happened during each visit. I also noted the organization of the house, the arrangement of the physical space where the children

to discuss their child-rearing values with other parents in a nonjudgemental way.

• Personally welcome participants.

Introduce new participants to someone from their culture or who speaks their language. If this is not possible, try to find something else parents have in common.

• Families may require intensive help in the beginning, but their needs will change as they learn and • Avoid stereotyping cultures, as benefit from services. there is diversity within each cultural • Integrate services where family group. Make sure interventions members (children, youth, parents, meet individual needs. grandparents) are engaged in • Mention similarities before programs together. talking about differences. Provide • Role-play situations and use opportunities for all parents, communicative and visual tools. including Canadian-born parents, Printed material may not be 10 Family Connections Spring 2012

played and the location of the toys. During the observations, mostly the mothers were present, but I interviewed all four parents.

Similar patterns to those of the centre findings were found in the homes. Jay’s family, and especially his mother, supported the “directed” approach. The mother focused on educational play activities such as alphabet toys and labelling items such as furniture in the house or things seen outside through the window. The alphabet toys were either electronic, where the child pressed a certain letter and then pressed the picture or words that start with the same letter, or puzzles with letters or numbers: “Because for me I like the educational toys, because now I stopped to

bring cars, now I bring educational toys…

Educational toys means 1, 2, 3 there’s a puzzle right… the small toy computers then he know ABC he know 1 to 10, he know the coloring” (Jay’s Mother).

On the other hand, Dalbir’s parents supported the “natural” approach to play in which the parents did not guide their children during play, and believed that in

particularly effective with some that there is no “best way” to newcomer families. raise a child. Parents need to be • Provide culturally appropriate comfortable and consistent with support. Integrate cultural diversity the decisions they make. concepts in every day programming, • Avoid evaluating a child’s not just for special celebrations. development based on his/her • Adapt your program to respect language abilities or behaviour. various holidays and accommodate • Respond to discriminatory comments practices such as food restrictions. quickly. Make it clear that such For example, some religions comments are not appropriate. prohibit the consumption of pork. • There is no single best approach.

• Physical settings can reflect Each program, area or family will diversity through pictures, seating have its own unique needs. arrangements (chair and floor seating), multilingual signs, bilingual Reprinted with permission from amssa Newcomer Children Information story books or cultural toys.

Exchange (ancie) Bulletin, February 2011.

• Be open to learning from newcomer parents, as they know their children and cultures best.

• It is important to emphasize

order to learn, children should make their own decisions regarding with what and with whom to play. They indicated that they would not choose the activities for the children, and that learning occurs naturally through their play because they have the freedom to play with whatever they want: “but if they are playing, I never say do this, don’t do that, do that, no. They are free to do anything, because they learn” (Dalbir’s Mother).

Despite the different views on play in both families, both mothers agreed that the drop-in centre was an important part of their children’s lives. At home they incorporated elements from the centre such as songs, and declaring “clean-up time”. The centre was a place where their children could interact with others, learn how to share, celebrate birthdays, develop their English language skills and get ready for school.

The parents found the transition from India to Canada to be very difficult. The fact that they did not have their extended families in Canada had impacted their lives greatly. It also changed the play interactions since in their own culture and tradition parents did not play much with their children, because there were always other play partners close by such as neighbours, cousins, siblings, friends and grandparents. However, in Canada the parents did not have these alternatives and they were also influenced by the western society which emphasizes that parents should devote time to play with their children.

The parents also missed the sense of community and support they had in India. As Dalbir’s mother said: “In Canada people raise their own kids, but in India other people raise your kids.” The parents talked about how in India the children could play freely outside or go to someone else’s house, since there were always other adults around to look after their children. Having to make an effort in order for their child to play with another friend, by calling in advance and arranging a “play date” was new to them. They also did not feel that it was safe to let their children go outside on their own and observed that there were not many children close by for their children to play with.

In conclusion, culture has a great influence on the lives of children and their play.

Moreover, in the same cultural group there may be large differences in approaches and activities towards play and child rearing in

general. Belonging to a certain group does not necessarily mean that people of that group hold the same belief systems. There is no “right” way to play with children, and therefore professionals who work in multicultural settings should be open and accept other approaches to play.

References Beiser, M. (1998). Growing up Canadian: A study of new immigrant children. Ottawa, ON: Human Resources Development Canada.

British Columbia Statistics (2001). Special feature: Immigrants from India. Retrieved August 24, 2010 from http://www.bcstats.gov.bc.ca.

British Columbia Statistics (2008). Population and demographics. Retrieved September 9, 2009 from http://www.bcstats.gov.bc.ca.

Edwards, C.P. (2000) Children’s play in crosscultural perspective: A new look at the six cultures study. Cross-Cultural Research, 34, 318-338.

Connect with readers.

Connect with families.

Advertising in Family Connections is a great way to showcase your events or services. Family Connections helps you get your message out to family service professionals all across BC. special member rates To book your advertisement, contact: Tina Albrecht, tinaa@bccf.ca Our next ad deadline is May 15, 2012.

Goldstein, M. (2010). Parent-child play interactions in immigrant South-Asian families. (Masters thesis, The University of British Columbia, 2010). Retrieved from https://circle.ubc.ca/handle/2492/29049.

Whiting, B.B. (Ed.). (1963). Six cultures: Studies of child rearing. New York: John Wiley.

HealthyFamilies!

 Maya Goldstein

Maya Goldstein completed her Master’s degree in Human Development, Learning and Culture at UBC. Her thesis focused on parent-child play interactions in immigrant South Asian Families. She currently works

Family news you need to know.

• New research • Policies and programs • Reports and statistics • Trainings and professional development • Events and updates from the BC Council for Families

for the Including All Children and Families: Expanding Partnerships Project at UBC.

Free! Delivered to your desktop every Monday morning.

Subscribe online: www.bccf.ca

Spring 2012 Family Connections 11

Focus

Ten Reasons to ❤ the Parent-Child Mother Goose Program  Janene Swalwell

12 Family Connections Spring 2012

T

he Parent-Child Mother Goose Program combines songs, rhymes and stories shared between a group of parents and their children under four years of age, supported by two teachers and an assistant.

The songs and rhymes involve everyone. The stories are told between the adults sometimes with children and sometimes while the children are cared for by the assistant. The emphasis is on shared communication and there are no props. The whole communal process provides understated, subtle nurturing of the interactions between those engaged. The teachers are observant, responsive to participants and highlight the children’s responses to their parents. The pace is relaxed, slow and repetitive.

Reasons for choosing Parent-Child Mother Goose are complexly inter-related. However, there are at least ten which can be separately described. Each reason for choosing ParentChild Mother Goose offers both positive “experiences”, and creates “opportunities” for enhancing development and promoting emotional health.

most people’s hearts.

Even when Parent-Child Mother Goose participants have not heard the stories, songs or rhymes of a particular tradition something of their tone, their format, metre and balance, speaks to them, but especially to those who grew up in that culture. So ParentChild Mother Goose restores and invigorates cultural knowledge and practices.

1. CONVEYING CULTURE, TRANSMITTING KNOWLEDGE Experiences Parent-Child Mother Goose conveys culture, tradition and wisdom. Songs, rhymes and story-telling are universal. They are part of every culture. Traditionally, parents and elders passed on knowledge through use of songs, rhymes and story-telling. Together, they have been the means to convey knowledge to children and communities throughout history.

In the past, these messages were conveyed incidentally during joint activities.

Parent-Child Mother Goose uses traditional processes which respect wisdom and affirm the importance of sharing information with children. Parent-Child Mother Goose reflects members’ cultural diversity and traditions, as well as the value of each individual’s contribution to the group.

Opportunities Many young parents find themselves isolated, lacking a group of local friends and neighbours, and especially lacking opportunities for shared experiences with those at a similar stage in family life. They benefit from the chance to make new friends, to be in a supportive group and, through the teachers, to find out about the supports and resources of their community.

Some parents find themselves isolated from their culture-of-origin. They enjoy being able to make contact with the wider community and, at the same time, share and contribute from their traditions. The sharing of songs and stories may be new to some participants but once they become comfortable with the process, their sense of shared community opportunities often pervades their family and cultural life from then on.

Opportunities Today, many people are isolated from their cultural roots, and often separated from their community of origin. They may be living in multicultural communities far away from their relations and childhood friends due to war, being refugees or having moved for greater opportunities. Others have lost knowledge of traditional culture as a result of disadvantages or active restrictions by dominant groups.

However, the traditional ways still “speak” to

3. ENJOYMENT AND SPECIAL TIMES Experiences Participating in Parent-Child Mother Goose is an enjoyable, warm, shared experience that encourages fun for all. Children love learning with their parents, particularly when it involves playfulness and humour.

Parent-Child Mother Goose creates opportunities for sharing special times together, which promotes intimacy. The program time becomes a significant

2. BUILDING COMMUNITY CONNECTIONS Experiences Parent-Child Mother Goose creates a sense of sharing and community. It builds friendships and links families in local neighbourhoods together. The experience of sharing in a community of song and of story-telling creates a warmth and energy between participants that is profound, especially as it involves multiple generations; parents, young children and supportive others. The ParentChild Mother Goose group becomes its own neighbourhood “friendship community”, with some members choosing to have regular contact outside the sessions.

Spring 2012 Family Connections 13

Focus

enjoyable feature in family life. Children regularly ask parents to repeat the increasingly familiar and newly introduced songs, rhymes and stories outside the Parent-Child Mother Goose Program. Parents grow in confidence and are affirmed by responses to their increasing story-telling capacities.

frameworks for cooperation, sharing time together, supporting routines, learning and enjoyment. All of which build experiences which increase mutual understanding and the use of parenting options, which encourage considerate ways of interaction and communication.

Opportunities Occasionally children find songs, singing and rhymes troubling. However, as they become familiar with the Parent-Child Mother Goose routine they gradually relax, and become engaged in the activities with their parents.

With persistence, they benefit greatly from new awareness, and understanding, of voice tones, rhythms, stresses and communicative interactions generally. Teachers are always flexible about participation and repeat features the children and families find most engaging. In the long run the participation opens opportunities that would not have been available otherwise in communication and social sharing.

5. COMMUNICATION AND INTERACTION Experiences Parent-Child Mother Goose promotes positive, shared interactions between parents and children. Without props or equipment of any sort, parents and children enjoy directly shared, mutual experiences of and with each other.

The reciprocity or “the dance of parentchild-parent-child” interaction is promoted, which is profoundly rewarding for both parties. Being aware of and sensitive to each other’s responses to materials (whether

4. SHARED KNOWLEDGE Experiences Parent-Child Mother Goose gives parents and children a shared repertoire of songs, rhymes and stories they can enjoy together. The activities become their special language - shared information and experiences that promote their connection with each other, and which they can share with their wider family. Parent-Child Mother Goose creates a repertoire for everyday routines and activities.

Family favourites are welcome additions to Parent-Child Mother Goose group sharing.

Teachers and families search out suitable items for the needs and preferences of each group and of individuals.

Opportunities Some parents’ childhoods have been very stressful or involved extremely negative experiences. They may not have recollections of positive parenting to draw upon in their child rearing. Parent-Child Mother Goose gives knowledge on which to base positive parenting interactions. The activities offer 14 Family Connections Spring 2012

respond when children initiate interaction.

Teachers help parents to increase children’s familiarity and ease with new materials.

In Parent-Child Mother Goose, the emphasis is on direct interpersonal communication. So Parent-Child Mother Goose encourages teachers and participating families to use themselves (their voices, facial interactions, gestures and bodily movements) as the resources for communication, rather than visual aids. However, some people always use communication supports and of course, these continue to be used.

6. CHILDREN’S SKILLS Experiences Parent-Child Mother Goose supports children’s development in communication, knowledge, social-emotional skills, in sense of belonging and contributing, and in their sense of

Parent-Child Mother Goose gives parents and children a shared repertoire of songs, rhymes and stories they can enjoy together. familiar or new) and sharing each other’s enjoyment, becomes increasingly familiar.

Parent-Child Mother Goose provides a vocabulary of interaction that is warm, supportive, predictable, patterned, readily recognised, responsive, connected and communicative (Joshi, 2006). The emphasis is on direct oral interaction, but songs, rhymes and stories naturally include gesture and bodily movement. Opportunities for children to express themselves through their bodies abound. Chants and rhythms often invite jumping, stamping, change of pace etc.

Opportunities All children and families benefit, but some have more need than others. Those who have difficulties develop a set of inner but mutual resources, able to be used flexibly when needed, as no props are required. Parents and children learn to observe each other’s responses – their preferences, their skills etc. The teachers support parents to notice children’s cues, to interpret what they might mean and to

efficacy. Research evidence (both Canadian and Australian) has demonstrated acceleration in development associated with the ParentChild Mother Goose (Spreckley et al 2010).

In addition children’s functional capacities are expanded, such as in being a member of a group, in remaining engaged and participating in activities and in initiating requests.

Opportunities Parent-Child Mother Goose provides routine based support which creates opportunities for learning. Domestic routines have been shown to be a most effective means for supporting learning in those children having difficulty, whatever their learning need (McWilliam, 2010). Social (awareness and interaction), emotional, communication and cognitive skills can all be developed through ParentChild Mother Goose. So Parent-Child Mother Goose has been used frequently in early intervention, where procedures and routines need to be especially familiar.

7. EMOTIONS Experiences Parent-Child Mother Goose explores emotions through songs, rhymes and stories.

One of the major tasks of early childhood is for children to learn about their emotions, to recognise and name emotional reactions in themselves and others, to learn emotional regulation and to learn about social interaction (Landy, et al, 2006). Parents want to assist their children’s emotional and social growth, realising that having emotional wellbeing and social skills are likely to make for happy and successful lives (Siegel et al, 2004).

Parent-Child Mother Goose provides ready media for this learning.

Opportunities Some parents are not aware of the importance of early childhood experiences as foundational to brain development. Songs, rhymes and stories provide a wide range of emotional experiences and opportunities for discussion of the benefit of this understanding for children. Parent-Child Mother Goose helps parents to articulate emotional and social complexity to children. The program promotes emotional togetherness, “good enough parenting” and community sharing, naturally and almost incidentally. (Landy et al, 2006; Immigrant Experience, 2006).

8. TOOLS Experiences Parent-Child Mother Goose gives parents a set of resources to use in parenting. Parents learn to use songs, rhymes and rhythms through simple modelled methods that replicate what early childhood educators might do to encourage children’s engagement during good and more difficult times. Group membership offers lots of opportunities for incidental learning and discussion of parenting techniques. Parents learn to use the resources to promote children’s development of more mature reactions.

Opportunities For parents concerned about managing their children’s behaviour, Parent-Child Mother Goose provides proactive techniques

Strengthening Attachment One Rhyme at a Time “An estimated 50 to 60% of children from typical families develop secure attachment relationships with their parents.” (Scharfe, 2011, p. 9) It is with this stark, disturbing statistic that Dr. Elaine Scharfe, a psychologist at Trent University in Ontario, introduces the findings of her recent study on the effectiveness of the Parent-Child Mother Goose program as an early intervention tool with families. It is becoming increasingly clear through research that secure early attachment is profoundly important to the developing child, impacting social, emotional, behavioural and physical health as well as longterm academic success.

And as this study demonstrates, participation in Parent-Child Mother Goose significantly increases attachment rates in parents and young children.

Scharfe’s study, “Benefits of Mother Goose: Influence of a Community-Based Program on Parent-Child Attachment Relationships in Typical Families” found that when families participated in Parent-Child Mother Goose, infant attachment scores increased significantly (from 55 to 81% secure attachment).

In the study, published in the September 2011 issue of the Journal of Child Welfare, families participating in Parent-Child Mother Goose groups in Peterborough Ontario were compared with families in waitlists for the program. Parents and children in both groups were evaluated three times – at the beginning of the program, immediately following completion of the program, and at a six month follow-up – measuring attachment levels and parental sense of competence.

 Beth

Hutchinson & Marilee Peters

In addition to the significant increases in infant attachment, adult attachment and parenting confidence also increased for program participants, while in the control group, infant attachment scores increased only minimally and adult attachment actually decreased over the time of the study.

Scharfe concludes that “one reason why the PCMG program may be beneficial for all parents, including predominantly avoidant individuals, may be because it is designed to focus on the practical skills associated with good parenting; parents do not feel judged despite the fact that many parents are learning new ways to interact, play and soothe their children”. (Scharfe, 2011, p. 22).

Her recommendation? Dr. Scharfe notes that “it is clear from the results that parents and children benefitted from this communitybased program … this is a cost effective way to intervene with parents who are not at risk but whose children may still benefit from improved parenting skills”. And she feels that the strong increases in attachment seen in this study indicate Parent-Child Mother Goose’s potential as a intervention with families at greater risk: “the program may be a cost-effective way to engage parents in high-risk families while working to improve their confidence with parenting.”

Source: Scharfe, Elaine. (2011) “Benefits of Mother Goose: Influence of a Community-Based Program on Parent-Child Attachment Relationships in Typical Families”. Journal of Child Welfare, Volume 90 p. 9-26. http:// www.cwla.org/articles/cwjabstracts.htm.

Spring 2012 Family Connections 15

Focus

immediately at their fingertips. For example, parents can support children to wait, to transition to new activities and to anticipate changes through song and rhymes, chanting and stamping. These offer “good parenting” techniques, taught simply without any implied criticism of either parent or child.

They just have another useful set of options at their disposal as needed. Often children learn to initiate a rhyme/ chant to support themselves through a task or transition they find challenging.

9. FOR EVERYONE (Mental Health and Intellectual Disability) Experiences Songs, rhymes and stories can be soothing.

Parents can calm children much more readily when they themselves are calm. Parent-Child Mother Goose can be emotionally in tune with the needs of a group and particular individuals. Assistance can be provided to both parents and children simultaneously through these experiences to learn skills together. Through the songs, rhymes and stories parent-child interaction can be sensitively supported, without need for explanation. Early childhood teachers often use songs, rhymes, chants and stories to help children learn skills.

Opportunities Parent-Child Mother Goose can support any parent. Using songs, rhymes and stories to assist parenting can be of benefit to those with mental health and intellectual disabilities, for example. The repetitiveness of songs and rhymes can be a boon to parents with learning, emotional or memory difficulties.

Likewise songs and rhymes can be chosen or created to support communication during difficult times of day. Chanting, stamping or singing reminds both parents and children of the social or emotional regulation skills they may need. Knowledge and self-organisation is gained readily when taught through repetitious group chorus and becomes an enjoyable aspect of daily routines.

both Canada and Australia showing the benefit of the program for parents and children. The strongest evidence is in children’s communication and language development. However, there is also evidence of development of social, interaction and parenting skills through Parent-Child Mother Goose (Joshi, 2006). In addition, there is evidence of the benefits of the ParentChild Mother Goose in the development of friendships, in neighbourhood networks, in use of supports and resources, and in group attendance figures.

References Immigrant Experience in the Parent-Child Mother Goose Program®, Panel Presentation, Early Years Conference 2006, Vancouver, BC.

Opportunities A danger of well-intentioned but ill-informed intervention with parents and/ or children who are in some way fragile, is that the intervention may be unsettling or may even be harmful (Landy et al 2006). Both the experiential training model for practitioners and the strengths based nature of the program makes it accessible and presentable by individuals with a wide range of training and experience. Songs, rhymes and stories are both the attraction and the resources of the program. Sharing them creates intimacy and builds bonds of trust between teachers and participants. Many participants feel safe enough to share sensitive information with teachers and/ or the groups. The groups become safe spaces which provide opportunities to discuss concerns. In turn talking issues through helps normalise families’ experiences, enabling participants to explore parenting ideas or accept referrals without feeling vulnerable or unsafe.

McWilliam, RA, (2010) “Routines Based Intervention.” Paul H Brookes, Baltimore, Maryland.

 Janene Swalwell

Janene is an educational and developmental psychologist, teacher and manager of family and children’s services. She works as a consultant supporting practice change and development in

10. SAFE AND EFFECTIVE Experiences Parent-Child Mother Goose has a strong and growing evidence base (Landy et al, 2006). Studies have been conducted in 16 Family Connections Spring 2012

early intervention. Her professional interests have always been in how to support families and parents to supporting their children no matter what the challenging circumstances.

Joshi, A., (2006) “Evaluating the Parent-Child Mother Goose Program: A Critical Review” University of British Columbia.

Landy, S and Menna, R (2006) “Early Intervention with Multi-Risk families: An Integrative Approach.” Paul H Brookes, Baltimore, Maryland.

Siegel, D.J. and Hartzell, M, (2004) “Parenting from the Inside Out” Penguin, USA. Spreckley, M., Terrett, G., Simpson, J., White, R., (2010) “Every Day in Every Way An evaluation of the Parent-Child Mother Goose Program” Paper presented at the Early Childhood Intervention Australia Conference, Canberra.

Good to Know

84%

Four years after arriving in Canada, the majority of new immigrants were positive about their decision to come here.

Why move to Canada? New immigrants said: Immigrant Youth • 32% appreciated the quality of life in Canada Immigrating to Canada at a young age can result in both risks and protective factors in • 20% wished to be closer to family and friends terms of mental health outcomes. Immigrant • 18% believed that the future prospects for youth reported similar levels of stress, their family would be better in Canada despair, and suicide as those born in Canada.

• 9% enjoy the peaceful nature of the country But females born outside of Canada reported lower rates of self harm than those born Challenges Faced by Immigrants inside Canada (18% vs. 22%), and were Although many immigrants are pleased with less likely to have a mental or emotional life in Canada, and the political and social condition (2% vs. 4%). environment, they still face challenges, even after living in Canada for several years: • 46% report difficulty finding an adequate job Quick Facts • 26% find learning English or French tough • Male immigrants are less likely to feel safe at school (39% vs. 44%) or be satisfied with personal appearance (16% vs. 20%) than Seeking employment is also a source of males born in Canada. challenge for immigrants: • 84% of foreign born students planned to • 50% have a lack of Canadian work graduate college/university compared to 76% experience of those born in Canada • 37% have few contacts in the job market • 56% of immigrant youth living in Canada • 37% have foreign experience that is not less than 2 years, reached out for professional recognized support compared to 43% of Canadian youth • 35% have foreign qualifications that are • 49% of immigrant youth played organized not recognized sports, compared to 62% of Canadian youth • 32% face language barriers • Immigrant youth are more likely to be

involved in arts, drama, dance or clubs • Being skilled at music resulted in higher self esteem for immigrant youth • Artistic skills corresponded to greater school safety for immigrant females (41% vs.

36% of immigrant females not skilled in art) • Having an adult in the family to talk to is associated with lower likelihood of suicidal ideation for immigrant youth • Involvement in meaningful activities is an important protective factor and factor in good health for immigrant youth Sources McCreary Centre Society, Making the Right Connections 2011. www.mcs.bc.ca/ahs_reports Statistics Canada, Longitudinal Survey of Immigrants to Canada 2007. www.statcan. gc.ca/daily-quotidien/070430/dq070430beng.htm.

Spring 2012 Family Connections 17

Balancing Act

Newcomer Families Experience Changing Family Dynamics After the 'honeymoon' phase, the reality of a new culture sinks in.

B

efore we can begin to talk about between two cultures. Parenting styles or skills and Canadian customs when they enter newcomer children, we must consider expectations may be different, and they may the school system, and often develop English family dynamics. Each family is have difficulty adapting or blending the good language skills faster than their parents. This unique, and a number of different factors from both cultures. can lead to shifts in family power dynamics, influence a child’s overall development, While a child’s right to play a role in as children may become the translator for including family structure, culture, values, decision-making is acceptable in Canadian daily communication in stores, with schools beliefs, language, health, education culture, it may not be as readily accepted in or during community activities. Children may and location. After arrival to Canada, other cultures. Children may be considered even be placed in difficult or inappropriate family dynamics may shift or evolve in “recipients” in the family rather than leaders situations, such as translating for doctors, unexpected ways from what they were or decision-makers. Newcomer parents may government officials or legal services. before immigration to Canada. It may be also worry that their children will lose the As newcomer children receive information difficult to cope in a new environment cultural traditions of their birth countries about Canadian culture, policies and services due to lack of family or social networks, if they integrate “too much” into Canadian through schools, they often have a better especially for those coming from society. However, exposure to different cultures understanding of them than their parents. community-centred cultures. enables children to develop biculturally or Some children use this information to multiculturally, allowing them to operate in increase their power in their relationships Settlement process two or more cultures. For example, a child with their families. For example, they may After the “honeymoon” phase of immigration may act in one way at school and another misinform their parents about homework is over, the reality of a new country sinks in. way at home, integrating expectations of or report cards, or they may even threaten The process can cause newcomer families to their families, school and friends. to call the police or child protection if experience changing family dynamics stress in their parents choose to discipline them families, and a number of factors may affect Grandparents in parenting roles or refuse to give them what they want. the process, such as: For many newcomer families, grandparents Shifts in power dynamics can put strain on • language/communication typically act as the primary caregiver while relationships between parents and children, • lack of recognition of parents’ professional parents work. There is often inconsistency as the role of the parent changes from credentials between the parenting styles of parents and authority figure to dependent.

• long work hours grandparents. Grandparents also have to deal • lack of affordable child care, especially for with their own increasing physical demands as Reprinted with permission from AMSSA Newcomer parents working night shifts they grow older. Supports are often available to Children Information Exchange (ANCIE) Bulletin, • poverty parents, but few are available for grandparents February 2011. http://boards.amssa.org/ancie/members/ • separation from extended friends who play primary caregiver roles. bulletin_board • discrimination or misunderstandings about cultural norms (e.g. attitudes or approaches Role reversal/power shift to discipline) A large number of immigrants and refugees • burnout or isolation are not fluent in English, and therefore have • speed of integration. difficulty accessing mainstream information.

Some newcomer parents are not even literate Culture in their mother tongue. Newcomer children Newcomer families need to manoeuvre have the opportunity to learn English, literacy 18 Family Connections Spring 2012

The Final Word

A DELICATE BALANCE: WORK AND FAMILY How will you celebrate International Day of Families, this May 15?

Here’s what I’ll be doing: working. Although that may seem a trifle ironic, in fact it’s a fitting way to observe this year’s International Day of Families, since the theme for 2012 is “Ensuring Work-Family Balance”. So to mark the importance of work-life balance in my own life, and in the lives of families around the world, I’ll be spending part of my day in paid employment, and I’ll also be focusing on what I can do to make sure that my family life gets the time and attention it deserves, as well.

Starting small, by thinking about the kind of balance we have in our own lives (and the kind of balance we need, and the kind of balance we’d like) is a first step. But it’s also important to recognize that attaining work-family balance isn’t merely a personal choice or a personal responsibility. Employers and governments have a large role to play here, in creating the policy frameworks that make family balance possible.

Work-family balance is a concept that barely existed a generation ago. Today, it’s perhaps the single most important issue in family life, and in family policy – internationally, nationally and regionally. As the good folks at the UN who organize the annual Day of Families remind us, “work-family balance lies at the core of the ability of the family to provide economically and emotionally for its members.”

And as we know, family obligations don’t end with children. Today, frequently the same families raising young children are also caring for elderly relatives, or family members with disabilities. Yet according to Statistics Canada, we’ve got less and less time to devote to raising our children or caring for our families: on average workers spent 45 minutes less per day with their family in 2005 than they did two decades earlier. Over the course of a year, that amounts to the equivalent of about 5 work weeks. That doesn’t sound like balance to me.

Employers and governments need to pay attention to work-family balance because the other option – doing nothing – will rapidly prove too costly to be tenable. Mounting health care costs, added to the social costs of fractured families and vulnerable children, plus the looming demographic reality of a generation of seniors requiring care: the math isn’t complicated. When we fail to support families, we all pay dearly.

According to the Universal Declaration of Human Rights , “The family is the natural and fundamental group unit of society and is entitled to protection by society and the state.” Protecting families means giving them the time to do what families do best: care for one another. Let’s start doing that.

 Marilee Peters

Like me, 52% of mothers globally are in the workforce today. In the developed world, more than half of women with children under three are now in paid employment. And while throughout human history women with children have worked, the structure of much of today’s labour puts additional stresses on family life (you can’t take a baby to the factory with you, nor can you pay attention to family while answering emails throughout the evening and weekend).

Marilee is the Acting Executive Director of the BC Council for Families. As mother to two tweens, and a busy professional, she knows the challenges today's parents face as they juggle the competing demands of work and family

Spring 2012 Family Connections 19

Know someone who has made a difference for families in BC this year?

Help to honour their contributions, and bring recognition to the individuals and organizations across BC whose efforts on behalf of families may often go unnoticed and unrewarded.

The Call for Nominations for the Distinguished Service to Families Awards is now open.

Visit us at www.bccf.ca