scott baio
Photo shoot by the BC team in the actor’s L.A. home
Jennifer maguire
the best choices for your family
HOLLYWOOD EXCLUSIVE:
BC’s one-on-one with the jewelry designer and Tobey Maguire’s wife www.bcmag.ph
P120 September 2011
Mothering vs. SmotherinG
PHI LI PPI NES
training yourself to be less protective
All The single parents A mother shares how she gets through Exclusive:
Miguel and Audrey Zubiri
Opens up their home for the first time to talk about family, career, and life after the historical Senate resignation
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INSIDE BC
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contents 12 jennifer meyer maguire This jewelry designer and mommy of two talks about family life with husband, Tobey Maguire 26 the truth about cough and colds Be vigilant about preventing and treating the common diseases this rainy season
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28 mothering vs. smothering Cristina Peczon-Rodriguez draws the line between being a supportive mother and a controlling parent 46 best choices From baby and mom products to personal hygiene and beyond, check out BC’s ultimate picks for your family
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contents 54 the institution of family The Zubiris talk about the calm after the storm, and how family always comes first 70 marionette theater These kids are ready for the big stage with these stylish sets
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22 38 On the Cover: Juan Miguel Zubiri, AudreyTan Zubiri, with children Juanmi and Adriana
90 scott’s in-charge A lookback at the fun and laidback photo shoot with the Baio family
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70 www.bcmag.ph
Kariz Tanya Favis Editor-in-Chief Martin Favis Creative Director
Valerie Anne del Castillo Associate Editor
Mark Cabalang Production Manager & Graphics Artist
Dee Nermal Editorial Assistant
Jepren Solis Graphics Artist
Contributors Neil Garguilo, Cristina Peczon-Rodriguez, Ian Victor, Meredith Scott, Julia Bennett, Minnie F. Francia, Monalisa C. Dimalanta, Jason Inocencio, Diego Jose, Uno Juan, Lia Ramos, Felicity Son, Raffy Tabunar, Xie Antonio BCMEDIA INC. Victor Aliwalas Group Associate Publisher
Kariz Tanya Favis Chairman & President
Charina Mitra Finance Manager
Jeyme Azarraga-Morallo Advertising Manager
Martin Favis Vice President & Publisher
Maricel Bancolita Account Manager
BC Magazine Philippines is published by BCMedia Inc., Unit 2C Building C Karrivin Plaza, Pasong Tamo Extension, Makati City, Philippines. Visit us online at www.bcmag.ph. Reproduction, in whole or in part, without the written permission of the publisher is strictly prohibited. For advertising, subscriptions, back orders or other inquiries, please call 0916.507.3227, 0939.130.0997, 889.6904 or e-mail info@bcmag.ph. Opinions expressed in this publication are that of the writers’ and are not necessarily endorsed by BCMedia Inc. BC Magazine Philippines is not responsible for unsolicited samples, products, work, and materials, and submissions are non-returnable. If you wish to submit written work, photographs, artwork, products, samples, other services, etc., please accompany with a self-addressed envelope, postage paid, or a prepaid return label.
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editor’s note
Top left, Clockwise: the zubiri couple flanked by tom and myself; at the baios’ kitchen in California; scott and i at a bc event in beverly hills; my daughters baking cookies with adriana zubiri
On Colors and Senior Citizens As I type this, my daughters are playing with their two cousins, and one of my nieces is pretending to be an alarm clock. No one wants to wake up, so the “alarm” just goes on and on. My husband and I burst out laughing because it went on for a while in the background while we were working. Thankfully, right when we were about to ask them to keep it down, they all decide to stop playing abruptly to ask for a snack. I always love being around children, because everything is so simple. You can tell them point blank to be quiet, not to jump on the bed nor talk while their mouth is full without them making a big issue out of it. I wish grown-up relationships were as black and white. In the case of our cover family who was involved in a massive controversy lately, it was unacceptable for them to be in the gray. Events that followed were quite monumental, and BC brings you an exclusive on former Senator Zubiri and his beautiful kin, who allowed a publication to photograph their lovely home for the first time. I write about them on p. 54 so I won’t divulge much, except that it is a heartwarming story, so I hope you enjoy it. One brood dear to mine is the Baios, whom I met in 2008. We worked together for their BC US cover a few months after, and our families have spent some time together since then. It’s sometimes surreal to go to their house or go out for dinners, fundraisers, and birthdays because I adored Scott Baio as a child. I will never say that age difference to his face though, haha. I grew up watching shows like Charles in
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Charge, and his movie, Zapped, was one of my favorite chick flicks because of its hilarious comedy and cool soundtrack for our time. Wow, I did just refer to it as “our time.” Moreover, please remember to check out our Playdate Cover Contest over at bcmag.ph and facebook.com/bcmag.ph. We’re gonna have a blast making that cover, because it is a first of its kind. BC turns monthly this issue, making it a perfect launchpad for the ‘BER season. Stores are filling up fast, and I’m not certain if I imagine it, but the traffic already seems to be getting heavier. Unbelievable how time flies—such a cliché, but truer words were never said. On the 26th, my first “child” turns 11, which means he will be 60 in human years. Our beloved Labrador, Bruce, is by ‘people’ standards, the eldest and most overweight (I am, sadly, in the running for the latter title as well), in our household. Too bad stores don’t accept a senior citizen card for pets, as it would help us save in the soaring costs of dog food for him and our Golden lady, Sera (we buy them BARK—Biologically Appropriate Real-food Kibble). Anyway, have a fabulous start to your Holiday season!
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randma’s homemade cornflake cookies—if you are looking for an alternative to massmanufactured snacks, let your kids munch on these crunchy, thin, buttery, not-too-sweet, mildly addictive cookies. Warning: children and adults have been known to fight for the last piece. Grandma’s cornflake cookies, P175 for one dozen, The Farm at Shop Familia
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+ Jennifer Meyer Maguire...nanny diaries...THE TRUTH ABOUT COUGH AND COLDS… www.bcmag.ph
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jennifer meyer maguire This mom has come into her own by designing special jewelry pieces that have carved itself as a favorite accessory among many women
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i n t e r v i e w b y k a r i z T ANYA f a v i s Wo r ds b y V ALERIE ANNE d e l c a s t i l l o
ne piece of jewelry links two notable Hollywood Jennifers together, and that’s Jennifer Meyer Maguire’s signature leaf pendant, which was worn by actress Jennifer Aniston in The BreakUp. Inspired by her grandmother, Edith Meyer, at a young age, Jennifer created jewelry out of enamel. It was this early start that sparked her interest in the art, which she pursued later in her life. Today, she is not only known as Uni-
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versal Studios President and COO Ronald Meyer’s daughter, and Spider-Man star Tobey Maguire’s wife, but Jennifer Meyer Maguire—the jewelry designer, eco-conscious mom who is raising her kids as vegans. Her signature diamond necklaces are worn by celebrity moms Salma Hayek, Gwen Stefani, Reese Witherspoon, and Courteney Cox. Learn what fuels this mom’s creativity and how she manages raising her two little ones, 4-year old Ruby Sweetheart and 2-year old Otis Tobias. www.bcmag.ph
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Your father is considered one of the most powerful men in Hollywood. Please describe your years growing up.
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I’m really lucky because my Dad is also my best friend. Throughout my life, he has taught me to have an incredible work ethic and to be kind, loving, and loyal. What is your best childhood memory?
My Dad drove my sister and me to school every single day until I turned 16. I loved having that special, undistracted time with him in the mornings. Your parents are divorced, and both of them remarried. How has their relationships affected the way you want to raise your family?
I’m grateful because even though my parents divorced when I was 8 years old, they’ve always remained very close friends and extremely loving parents. Three words that best illustrate your relationship with your grandmother, Edith, who helps inspire you as an artist.
Love, happiness, inspiration, grateful, relaxed. Couldn’t stop at three. You worked in the PR industry, and were a magazine editor before launching your own jewelry line. What made you decide to go into the jewelry design business?
It’s always something I wanted to do. I didn’t have any formal training, I had to teach myself the craft. Fortunately, I had the experience of working with two of the most talented fashion designers in the world, Giorgio Armani and Ralph Lauren. They taught me a lot about being hands-on. Can you tell us more about the leaf and wishbone pieces that launched and are signature to your career?
I designed the leaf first because it represented “turning over a new leaf” and starting a new business—a new adventure. The wishbone is part of a series of pieces I designed around symbols that represent luck. Because, let’s face it, who doesn’t need a little luck?
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Other designers you look up to?
There are so many talented designers I admire, from Shoshanna for her bikinis, Isabel Marant, Kathy Rose for her delicate snake bangle. Hard to narrow it down. Tell us more about your new collection, and how it differs from the past ones.
I’ve started to work with different stones and materials. I’m also focusing on expanding on my personalized collection, which I feel very connected to as a mom. I love being able to wear my kids’ initials around my neck. How is Tobey Maguire like as a father?
I happen to be married to someone who counterbalances me perfectly. For example, he has mastered keeping me and the kids calm in all situations! Funny stories about him and the kids?
Something happened the other day that comes to mind: Tobey’s Grandma was reading a book to my daughter,
Ruby, about princesses and she said to her that, “One day you’ll meet your prince.” In response, Ruby said, “That’s OK—I’ve already found my prince. My Daddy.” What is it like being a parent to a daughter and a son?
Best of both worlds. What made you decide to raise your children as vegans?
Whether you’re a vegan, a vegetarian or a meat-eater, it’s about making informed, healthy choices. It’s about putting the healthiest possible options in your body. And while I am in charge of making these decisions for my kids, I am going to be careful about what they’re eating. My stepmother started a charity called the Teaching Garden that advocates healthy eating for children and adults. We need to be better informed, and we need these options, and Kelly is spearheading this effort beautifully. www.bcmag.ph
H o l ly w o o d M o m P r o f i l e
“Tobey’s Grandma was reading a book to my daughter, Ruby, about princesses and she said to her that, “One day you’ll meet your prince.” In response, Ruby said, “That’s OK—I’ve already found my prince. My Daddy.”
What kid-friendly vegan recipes would you suggest to parents who have little to no time to cook?
Some of my quick favorites are sliced apples and fresh peanut butter; carrots and celery with hummus; black bean and brown rice burritos with chopped tomatoes, guacamole. We’ve read that you’re a self-confessed, bona fide California girl. Do you see yourself raising your children somewhere else?
Personally, I love California because I was born and raised here, and if this is where I end up raising my children, I’ll have no complaints. Very fortunately because of my husband’s job, we have the opportunity to visit a lot of places. Must-haves now that you have two little ones?
The Little Seed is my one-stop shop for everything kidrelated. Wipes are also a must-have. I use them for everything from taking off my makeup to cleaning a runny nose to wiping my son’s bottom! Style tips for moms?
Buy jewelry that you can wear from morning to night. I often wear the same pieces from school drop-off to an evening dinner with friends. Wear comfortable shoes that are stylish—ballet flats are the perfect complement to any outfit. I don’t wear makeup, but love to put on some bronzer if I need a little pick me up. My favorite is Instant Sunshine bronzer by Philosophy. Basic parenting advice?
You can never spoil your kids with too much love. With such a successful family life and career, is there anything else you wish for? Jennifer’s pieces are versatile, as they can be worn from day to night
If we could all figure out how to make sure that no child on earth goes to bed hungry, that would be my greatest wish. bc
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FOR BABY It’s best to teach your kids proper hygiene at an early age. Make sure their oral health is tip top by cleaning their gums with tooth tissues or a damp cotton cloth, and encouraging them to regularly brush their teeth as your toddlers grow.
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healthy and clean Here to help you make the best choices for your child is our list of favorite selections for both mommy and baby p h o t og r ap h s b y b y r o n h e n r y s a n t i a g o
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1 Musical Timer Toothbrush by FIREFLY, P179 2 Baby Wipes Lightly Fragranced by BABYFLO, P18.50 3 Baby Grace Shampoo Bath & Shower Gel by PHILOSOPHY, P1,450, Beauty Bar 4 Baby powder by ENFANT, P89.75 5 Light up Timer Toothbrush by FIREFLY, P129.75 6 Baby Milk Lotion by JOHNSON & JOHNSON, P119 7 Baby Bee Diaper Ointment by BURT’S BEES, P550 for 55g, Beauty Bar 8 Baby Butter by CANUS LIL GOAT’S, P750, Beauty Bar
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As a mother, you want your child to hear and understand every word of love you say. But hearing loss and brain damage can get in the way of that, especially for babies who catch the bacteria that may cause both otitis media and meningitis. Otitis Media, or “luga,” is an ear infection that is one of the leading causes of hearing loss in the country,(2) while meningitis is an infection of the brain that may lead to mental retardation. Both Otitis Media and Meningitis are infections that belong to a family of diseases called pneumococcal disease. 1 out of 3 Filipino children who suffer from invasive pneumococcal disease, or IPD, will die.(3) Give your baby adequate protection against the most common bacteria causing meningitis, pneumonia, sepsis, and ear infections. Ask your doctor and protect as early as 6 weeks of age.(4)
A disease awareness campaign supported by
REFERENCES: (1) Hausdorff W., et al, “Multinational Study of Pneumococcal Serotypes Causing Acute Otitis Media in Children” PIDJ 2002; Vol 21 No.11: 1008-16. (2) WHO Ear and Hearing Disorders Survey of Quezon Province; Martinez, NV et al 2001. Better Hearing Philippines (3) Santos J et al. “Active Hospital-based Epidemiological Surveillance of IPD in Children in Metro Manila, Philippines” poster presented at the 2010 ISPPD, Tel-Aviv, Israel Capeding et al. Pneumococcal Serotypes Among Filipino Children Admitted to a Tertiary Care Center For Infectious Diseases in 2000-2005 PIDJ 2007 vol 11 no 1 (4) Synflorix Country Prescribing Information GDS003/IPI03) SYN001640411
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FOR MOM Rejuvenate your skin with hypoallergenic and mild moisturizers that will bring back your youthful glow. Set aside a few minutes of your time each day to relax and pamper yourself, and remember that the best way to encourage your kids to be hygienic is to set a good example and be neat and tidy yourself.
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1 Day Cream Naturals with Camellia Leaf Extracts by POND’S, P24.50 2 Lip gloss by LAURA MERCIER, P1,895 3 Conceive Plus PreConception Lubricant by SASMAR, P950 4 Angel Star Body Soft Soufflé by NIVEA, P42.50 5 Toothbrush Sanitizer by STERIPOD, P184 6 Eye Color by REVLON, P1,950 7 CyberWhite Ex Intensive Whitening Treatment by ESTEé LAUDER, P2,900 8 Bath Milk Soap by DOVE, P32.50 9 Aeroblast Spray Spearmint by BINACA, P189 10 Vitamin C Facial Radiance Capsule by THE BODY SHOP, P1,595 11 Hydro Boost Essence by NEUTROGENA, P2,250 12 Alcogel Aromatherapy Anti Bacterial Hand Wash Calm Me Delicately by BENCH, P149 13 Revitalift Double Eye-Lift by L’ORéAL PARIS, P695 14 Anti-Wrinkle UltraHydrating Cleansing Oil with Dual Vitamin Regenerating Complex by CéLETEQUE, P699 15 Skin Light Deodorant Stick by REXONA, P69.50
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Check out the winners of BC Magazine’s online contests. Log on to bcmag.ph to join the fun!
Cutest Kid Photo Contest Chole Ae de Leon
Shawn Ryejohn Rivera
Reeane Jaiana Guiang
Father’s Day Contest 2011
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Perfecto Gonzales sent by May G. Mariano
Efren Robles sent by Jane Robles
Entry sent by Jeniva Jacaban
Raffy Tabunar sent by Amy Tabunar
Entry sent by Vangelique Sumalinog
Entry sent by Ofelia Concepcion
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got to go to guam Your next idyllic family get-away!
WORDS by Jason Inocencio and Lia Ramos
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here are some segments of Philippine society who wonder what would have happened had the country stayed under colonial rule. Whether it be the Spanish, the Japanese, or the Americans, our past colonizers left an indelible mark on our land, and it is evident in different parts of our culture. If you look over at what has long been termed as “Micronesia” though, you’ll find an island with a tale similar to the Philippines’. This is Guam.
power, bringing it into conflict with the old guard that was Spain. Due to their status and respective locations, both Guam and the Philippines became prime targets for Japan’s Imperial Army leading up to World War II. When the so-called “War in the Pacific” began in earnest following the bombing of Pearl Harbor in December 1941, both the Philippines and Guam became crucial battlegrounds for the opposing forces of Japan and the U.S.A.
Before Magellan landed on Homonhon Island near Cebu in March 1521, the Spanish fleet had already arrived in Guam a month earlier. Spanish missionaries, Jesuits in particular, brought Catholicism to the island, using religion for both colonization and evangelization purposes. In the latter part of the 19th century, the United States began establishing itself as a colonial
Shopper’s Haven
From the ashes of war, America re-established an even stronger presence in Guam, helping rebuild the roads and infrastructure, as well as healing the wounds inflicted on the native Chamorro people. The Guam Organic Act of 1950 established Guam as an unincorporated organized territory of the United States. In the decades since,
the people of Guam have reshaped the island into an idyllic tourist destination with pristine beaches, as well as a shopper’s paradise brought on by duty-free shopping. A “duty” is a tax or charge levied by a city or country, sometimes made on foreign products coming into locations while other times levied on selected types or quantities of products. In the Tumon shopping district lie a variety of duty-free malls that are sure to catch the attention of serious shoppers. The DFS Galleria features some of the most recognizable luxury brands such as Gucci, Longchamps, Hermes, Omega, Marc by Marc Jacobs and Bvlgari. High-end bags, ties, clothes, perfume, chocolates, and even alcohol are all within reach here. A few minutes away is Tumon Sands Plaza, an elegant retail haven that offers highend name brand merchandise. Louis Vuitton boasts three floors and allows
“The isle of Guam truly has had a unique story to tell”
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The island is an open playground of water sports. Families may enjoy activities such as swimming, snorkeling, jet skiing, kayaking, parasailing, and windsurfing. The best snorkeling sites are on Tumon Bay Marine Preserve, Piti Bomb Holes and in the southern village of Merizo.
one to personalize the bags purchased there. Joinus Restaurant Keyaki provides some of the most sought-after Japanese cuisine on the island, allowing shoppers a respite after a few stops around the mall. On the north side of Guam in Dededo is Micronesia Mall, which calls itself “Guam’s largest American-style shopping mall.” Popular New York-founded department store chain Macy’s is at the center of the mall, surrounded by 130 shops, boutiques, restaurants, a movie theater, indoor amusement center Funtastic Park, and a 750-seat Fiesta Food Court. Vice-President and Operations Manager Vic Lo proudly says, “We are a Filipino mall,” as majority of the mall’s staff are Pinoys. Hit the Beach and More
Guam is also famous for its pristine beaches and numerous dive spots that have only helped shape its reputation as a favorite destination for tourists. Families may enjoy activities such as swimming, snorkeling, jet skiing, kayaking, parasailing, and windsurfing. The best snorkeling sites are on Tumon Bay Marine Preserve, Piti Bomb Holes and in the southern village of Merizo. Guam’s tropical waters are home to more than 300 types of coral and 950 species of coral reef fish. Three of the most popular dive sites in Guam are SMS Cormoran, Tokai Maru, and the Kitsugawa Maru. If your kids are eager to discover life underwater but are fearful of scuba diving, Atlantis Submarine Expedition will provide you and your children with a spectacular experience of the island’s colorful marine life. The Atlantis, a fully submersible vessel, carries 48 passengers and the tour of the dive site lasts approximately 45 minutes. Waking up to Paradise
Most of the hotels on Tumon Bay are right in front of the beach, thus almost guaranteeing that every room has a view one can only dream of. Over at Pacific Island Club, one can find a waterpark where kids can learn to snorkel and dive. At night, the P.I.C. comes alive with fire in a show that features dances from Hawaii, Samoa, Tahiti, and of course, Guam. Even the waterfalls catch fire during the show as the pulsating drum beats lead to an exciting climax. The isle of Guam truly has had a unique story to tell. From its colonial history to enduring the horrors of war, Guam has emerged as a tourist hotspot noted for its shopping privileges while still promoting the natural beauty of the island. With so many things to do on the island, it’s no surprise that the Guam experience is something one won’t easily forget. bc
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the truth about cough and colds Wo r ds b y V a l e r i e A n n e d e l C a s t i l l o P H O T O G R A P H B Y J E P REN SOLIS
“The first symptom of a cold is usually a tickle in the throat, a runny nose, and sneezing.These can also be accompanied or followed by a mild fever, cough, head ache, and loss of appetite.“
We may think that we know all about them, but these sicknesses should not be taken lightly. Learn the tips to prevent the spread of cough and cold-causing viruses and how these rainy season illnesses can be treated Salbutamol by VENTOLIN, P140 for 60 mL . Decongestant / Antihistamine by NASATAPP, P96.75 for 60 mL . Lagundi Leaf cough remedy by ASCOF, P168.75 for 120 mL . Ascorbic acid by CLUSIVOL, P69.75 for 60 mL . Cetirizine by ZYRTEC, P392.50 for 60 mL . Loratadine by DISUDRIN, P91.50 for 10 mL . Decongestant by DIMETAPP, P93.25 for 60 mL . Loratadine by CLARITIN, P293.50 for 30 mL . Carbocisteine by ROBIKIDS, P147.50 for 120 mL . Carbocisteine by SOLMUX, P89 for 60 mL (***Always consult your pediatrician before use)
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he rainy season threatens to bring us more than just storms and days spent indoors. In fact, this time of the year is when our kids are most vulnerable to an array of illnesses, most especially cough and colds. The drastic change in temperature, humidity, and moisture of the environment makes it more conducive for viruses to proliferate at a higher rate. Because of this, everyone becomes more exposed to these disease-causing viruses, which can easily be passed on from person to person. AVOID THE SPREAD OF GERMS
Wash your hands frequently. Use a gentle, hypoallergenic, antibacterial soap and work it up into a lather. Vigorously rub your hands together for about 15 to 20 seconds, making sure that all surfaces are covered, including the areas between your fingers, under the nails, and the back of your hand. Dry your hands with a disposable paper towel and avoid touching the sink or the faucet. If soap and water are not readily available, you can use sanitizer or alcohol-based hand wipes.
Contrary to popular belief, the primary cause of cough and colds isn’t the exposure to rain itself, but the exposure to disease-carrying viruses common during the cold season. We can easily get in contact with these impurities through a simple handshake, or by merely touching a contaminated surface, such as a door handle. It is imperative to be extra vigilant when it comes to keeping ourselves and our homes clean, especially during the rainy season.
fection develops from the initial virus. Your child may have more than just the cold if they are experiencing wheezy, noisy, fast, or difficult breathing, persistent earache, persistent high temperatures, drowsiness, chest pains, usual irritability and crying in babies, a cough that persists more than 3 to 4 weeks, or bloody saliva or mucus. If any of these symptoms develop, or any other signs that you cannot explain or you are concerned about have aroused, see a doctor immediately. COMMON TREATMENTS
Cover your mouth and nose when sneezing and coughing. Avoid scratching itchy eyes and use eye drops instead. Also avoid touching your eyes, nose, and mouth. Never share personal items like utensils, tableware, glasses and straws, towels, toothbrushes, washcloths, etc. If a family member is sick, staying at home for rest and proper medication is recommended. Routinely disinfect surfaces that are often touched by several people, like telephones, switches, door knobs, faucets, toys, etc. Avoid crowded places and keep away from people who are sick, sneezing, or coughing. SYMPTOMS TO WATCH OUT FOR
According to the U.S. National Institutes of Health, children get 6 to 10 colds a year on average. The first symptom of a cold is usually a tickle in the throat, a runny nose, and sneezing. These can also be accompanied or followed by a mild fever, cough, head ache, and loss of appetite. Sometimes, however, a more serious bacterial inwww.bcmag.ph
Most coughs and colds go away without complications. Symptoms are worse during the first couple of days, and then ease over the succeeding days. An irritating cough can last up to 2 to 4 weeks even after the symptoms have gone. Common treatments to ease symptoms include paracetamol for fever, headaches, and minor aches and pains; ibuprofen is an alternative treatment for paracetamol. Other medicines and their uses that you should take note of include nasal decongestants such as saline, to unblock a stuffy nose, cough suppressants to quiet a cough, antihistamines to stop sneezing and runny noses, and expectorants, for loosening mucus, making it easier to cough out. Boost your family’s immune system and help protect them from such disease-causing viruses and other bacteria. An extra dose of Vitamin C (from sources like oranges, lemons, lychees, strawberries, cruciferous vegetables, and supplements) can also provide you with great health benefits. Ask your pediatrician for the best multivitamin supplement for your child. bc
keep THESE in mind when treating coughs and colds:
+ The new advice is that parents should no longer give over-thecounter (OTC) cough and cold medicines to kids under the age of 6. Read labels carefully. Many of the medicines for cough and colds contain the same active ingredients. Parents must not administer two medicines that contain the same active ingredients to a child. The intake of too much pain relievers may lead to serious injury. Do not give aspirin to children. Use of aspirin for kids and teens under 19 can increase the risk of developing Reye syndrome, a serious illness that can affect the brain and liver. Keep your little one hydrated. For babies, give them breast milk or formula, or an oral electrolyte solution designed for infants. For children beyond a year old, try water, milk, and diluted juice. Make sure that your child eats when he or she is hungry. Don’t force him if he is not interested in eating. Stick to light foods, and avoid giving him anything too oily or spicy. If your child’s throat is feeling extra sore, avoid giving them citrus fruits. Know how to properly administer, handle, and store medicines. Never leave your kids alone with any kind of drugs, and make sure these are properly stored inside your home, away from your children’s reach. Always check for expiry dates before administering to any of your family members, and use the proper measuring device. Follow the instructions on the label and make sure that the medicines you are giving are age-appropriate to guarantee its effectiveness.
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mothering vs. smothering It’s human nature to care for your little one. But when your overprotection gets in the way of his growth, it’s time to take a step back
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W O R D S a n d P H O T O G R A P H S b y CRIS T INA P EC Z ON - RODRIGUE Z illus t r a t io n b y M ARK F RANCIS CARANDANG
oday, our 2-year old rode his bike down a small slope— perfectly balanced for a fleeting but proud moment. Moments later, he crashed and flew over the handlebars. How did we react? My husband said nothing and I actually cheered. My toddler promptly stood up, wiped the dirt from his hands and clothes and got back on with a smile. Granted my son was wearing a helmet and both knee and elbow pads so I knew he couldn’t possibly hurt himself— especially since his strider bike was relatively safe, even though it has no training wheels. But the real training has been with me. Not so much with my son, I think, but with me as a parent, learning to hold back rather than swoop down to protect my child every second of the day. Over the last two years, it has taken a lot of restraint on my part not to overreact when it came to my son hurting
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himself. More and more though, I am realizing that all that hard training is paying off. Let’s face it. Kids will be kids. They want to run, jump and climb. It’s in their nature. In fact, allowing your child to explore and exercise curiosity should be rewarded! Preventing your child from trying new physical challenges ultimately can hamper your child from gaining normal self-esteem, social competence, and courage. “Be careful! You might fall!” We’ve overheard these parents who hover inches away from their child over their own fears that they might, heaven forbid, fall and experience a boo-boo that will warrant a Band-aid. But what is really happening is these parents are creating fear for their child where there is none. Fear is a learned reaction. Overprotectiveness creates www.bcmag.ph
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fear-filled, anxious, and emotionally immature children. This is not to say that I am one of those mothers who could care less about how her child is. My reporter days where I was trained to scan the room for details have paid off—as my unnoticed quick glances at my kids seem to be enough. Heck, I secretly would love to have a padded Gymboree-type playroom in my house if I had the space for it. But I have realized that I am doing my children a favor by teaching them to be tough. I don’t want my child to be the one who constantly cries over the smallest thing. I reward my son with praise and attention when he does something well— not when he is throwing a tantrum because he was embarrassed over a minor fall. I know my two-year old constantly looks at me for cues on how he should react. My poker face skills unknowingly have worked for me even though they never worked when I was actually trying to win at cards. Underreacting seems to be the winning ticket in this situation. Children of parents who overreact tend to be miniature drama queens. The funny thing is, you take that same child in a mishap situation and if their parents are not there—chances are, not a single tear will be shed. What’s the point when your number one drama fan isn’t even there to do anything about it? Of course, if your child is really hurt, then by all means, you need to step up. The point is not to hold your child back based on your own fears. Children need to learn on their own. They need to find their own limitations. And they need to know that it’s okay to get hurt a little, just as long as they know to stand up and try again.
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As a little girl, I once had jumped off our back door steps and banged my head on a piece of metal sticking out of the ground. I managed to give myself a nasty little gash that would need three stitches from the emergency room. Right after falling, I stood up and attempted to jump again. I was oblivious to the fact that blood was all over my face. It probably didn’t hurt very much and so I wasn’t bothered by the fall. Up until my brother discovered me and the red all over the place and brought me to my parents in panic. That’s when I realized it was time to cry. I know that I for one was one of those kids that had to learn by experience. You could tell me a million times that something was going to hurt—but I refused to believe it until I tried it. I guess you can say I eventually smartened up. I survived childhood. I also drank water from our backyard hose, I played outside until the sun came down, and I rode roller skates without a helmet. Children of this generation by far are much more safe. It’s important to recognize that holding your child back from activities that other children can handle with ease can break a youngster’s confidence and self-respect. Instead, teach your child responsibility for their own actions—rather than teach them that their judgment can not be trusted. Who knows, today we are talking about getting back on a bike after a fall. Tomorrow, it could be about asking the boss for a raise or promotion. As parents, it is our job to take care of our children in every way that we can. But it is also our job to teach them not to be afraid to try and reach for the stars. Giving your child the gift of confidence might just be the beginnings of a strong and fearless will that serves as the backbone of a future president.
Mommy Guidelines Don't react or worse, OVERreact.
Your child looks to you for cues. If they are really hurt, they will let you know. Avoid burdening your child with your own fear.
“Be careful! You might fall!” This only creates fear-filled, anxious, and emotionally immature children. The playground is your friend.
Running, jumping, and climbing in the safety of an age-appropriate playground should put your mind at ease. Preventing your child from trying new physical challenges ultimately can hamper your child from gaining normal self-esteem, social competence, and courage. Don't hold your child back.
When your child's peers are handling activities at ease and yours has never even tried them, you know something is wrong. Instead, teach your child responsibility for their own actions—rather than teach them that their judgment can not be trusted. Mother don't smother.
Teaching your toddler to be tough and independent might just be the best way to show your love for you little one—by allowing your child to grow.
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nanny diaries Setting household policies for nanny to follow Wo r ds b y M i n n i e F. F r a n c i a illus t r a t io n b y B y r o n h e n r y s a n t i a g o
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had just gone back to work three months after giving birth to my eldest child when my first nanny crisis happened. Sunday was my nanny’s day-off and I had assumed she would be back that same evening. However, she still had not returned the following day and my frantic calls to her phone were not answered. Nanny finally showed up Monday evening, nonchalantly explaining that she decided to stay an extra day at her relative’s house. Of course, by that time, I was already a wreck and had to take an unexpected leave off from work, as my caregiver decided that it’s okay to extend her day-off. Years and another child later, I have gradually learned how to establish a smoother relationship with my nannies. Lesson number one for me is to never assume that nanny knows what I expect her to do. I
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really have to clearly spell out to nanny my specific expectations from her in terms of her performance, attitude towards her work, and even her personal hygiene. I also let nanny know what she can expect from me, like her salary, day-off schedule, and other concerns. This way, she also knows what kind of support she will be getting from me. Felichi Pangilinan-Buizon, mother of four and lecturer of The Parenting Company’s “Yaya Seminars,” agrees. She shares that when she first hires a yaya, she already tells her what she expects from her from the start. “Every time a new yaya comes in, we tell her there are basically two things we expect from her: honesty and respect. Everything falls under that. She should be truthful and obedient.”
SET GROUND RULES
As with any employer-employee relationship, setting clear rules and expectations will help you come up with an arrangement that will work for your household. When setting these rules however, explain to your nanny in simple terms, the reasons behind them. For example, tell her what kind of language is unacceptable in your home, and why such words are against your family values. That way, she’ll better understand that these rules were not meant to deprive her or to curtail her freedom. Here are some basic nanny rules you should consider implementing in your home: www.bcmag.ph
H O U S E R U LE S CHILD TREATMENT
These are the most basic yet nonnegotiable rules in my book. I often witness nannies that are mean to their wards. I have seen a nanny hit a little girl with an umbrella, and another who bullied a boy to tears because of her spiteful words. Such horror stories have made me extra careful in screening nanny applicants as well as more vigilant with the way they treat my children. Nanny should strive to always be loving and protective of your child. Make it clear to your nanny that she must never, in any circumstance, hurt your child. She must be gentle with her hands and manner of speaking to her ward at all times. Only you and your spouse are allowed to discipline your child. If your child needs to be disciplined, nanny should just tell you. Another rule you should tell nanny is that she cannot use any of your child’s things for her personal use. I have seen a nanny sharing a spoon with her ward while feeding the child. Explain that this is not hygienic. Because you will be leaving your child to nanny’s care for the most part of the day, be sure to discuss other child-rearing rules, such as: not to scare your child with ghost stories, if it is okay to feed him “junk food” for snacks, and what kind of shows your child is allowed to watch. DAY-OFF
Nanny’s day-off can be a contentious issue, so discuss your day-off policies before you even agree to hire her. If Sunday is her rest day, this should be a rule you too should be considerate enough to follow. Be specific about the time you expect your nanny to be home. “Please be back by 9 P.M.” is more understandable to nanny, than “Be back after dinner.” If nanny is allowed to stay out overnight, tell her that the occasional nights off should be scheduled ahead of time. Use of cellphones and TV viewing
Lay down rules for things that may put your child in danger, such as your nanny’s indiscriminate texting or use www.bcmag.ph
of her cellphone. When my kids were infants, I was very particular about this. I could not emphasize enough that she needs to be vigilant about the baby’s safety, so she should always be alert and not be distracted with using up her cellphone load. For the same reason, you should also lay down rules on TV viewing. My nanny can only watch TV in her room during her free time. When she’s with my child, they can only watch pre-approved shows or videos together. The last thing you want to find out is that your child has been watching sleazy noontime shows and for-adults-only telenovelas. SECURITY ISSUES
Instruct her not to divulge information about your family to other nannies in the neighborhood. She should avoid discussing your sources of income, or bragging about how many cars you own to other people, as this can put your family in danger. In this age of social networking online,
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you should also consider setting rules on whether nanny is allowed to take photos of your child using her own cellphone and to upload these on her Facebook account. This can be a real security risk for your child, as any one of nanny’s “friends” may turn out to be a kidnapper. If taking personal photos of your child is an issue to you, you can just take solo shots of your nanny using your own camera. Give her copies of her photos so she would also have souvenirs of your family vacation. PERSONAL HYGIENE
You may feel awkward setting rules on personal hygiene, but remember that your nanny will be in very close contact with your family so this is important. Buizon shares that nanny’s lack of hygiene may even cause a child not to like his nanny. “The child may not like how nanny smells or how she fixes herself,” she explains. bc
Tell your nanny that you expect her to always be clean, fresh and neat. Some points you should remind her about include:
1. The use and care of her uniform. Let her know
when she’s expected to wear her uniform, and that she should keep this neat and clean. If she’s one of those oversensitive girls who think uniforms are demeaning, tell her that wearing a well-kept uniform is important for your baby’s cleanliness. 2. Hair. Neatly tied-up
in a bun or hairnet. You wouldn’t want your baby sucking on nanny’s hair or getting hair strands on baby’s food.
3. Colognes and scents. My
husband and kids suffer from allergic rhinitis, so strong scents are a no-no. I always have to remind my nanny not to use colognes and lotions because the smell can be overpowering. I tell her that it’s okay to use her potions at night or when it’s her day-off. 4. Basic hygiene. Instruct your
nanny to take a bath at least once a day. Nails should always be clean and trimmed. Regular hand washing, particularly after she comes from the bathroom, is also important to keep your child safe from diseases.
Treat with respect
Your nanny rules are meant to help establish a good working relationship with your nanny, but don’t be such a stickler to your rules that you become insensitive to her feelings. Remember that you’re dealing with a person who also deserves to be treated with respect. If you discover that your nanny broke a rule, investigate first before you scold. She may have a legitimate reason for coming home late, for instance. When nanny needs to be corrected, simply tell her why she’s wrong, listen to her side of the story, then work out together how the mistake can be avoided in the future. Sure, you’re the boss, but don’t take up a condescending attitude towards your nanny. Instead, treat your nanny as an intelligent partner in bringing up your child and as a welcome part of your household, so she will be encouraged to always do her job well. { SEPTEMBER 2011 } b c PHILIPPINES
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No amount of experience, readings, sermons, nor seminars can prepare you for fatherhood—it’s a role that you master over time and on the job Wo r ds b y r a ff y t u b u n a r p h o t og r ap h B Y M a r k C a b a l a n g
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think American author Kent Nurburn said it best: “It is much easier to become a father than to be one.”
Limited edition diapers by DRYPERS, P259.75, Pack of 32, Size Small
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When my wife and I found out that fateful morning of June 9, 2007 that we were going to be parents, I was both excited and worried. I’ve always imagined myself to be a father eventually, but I wasn’t expecting it at that moment in time. I had no experience whatsoever on being a father—but then again, who does? I relied heavily on my wife to guide me, and on my parents to
share with me pieces of advice from time to time. So for the next 9 months, I took my time talking to my dad and friends about their experiences on being first-time fathers. I read some articles and books, and topped it all off with prayers, prayers, and more prayers. I found out later on that no matter how much you prepare, you will always find yourself stalling, collecting your thoughts, and mapping out a shortlist of tasks that you need to accomplish for your newborn. www.bcmag.ph
G E T T I N G RE A DY
Becoming a father is easy, but being one is hard. Becoming a father can happen overnight, but being a father is a role of a lifetime. The first day I brought my daughter home, I was clueless as to how to give her first bath, how to put on her diaper, or even how to clean her dirty bottles. I knew the three main reasons children usually cry (i.e. hunger, dirty diaper, upset stomach), but I had no idea how to process it whenever my daughter cried. Even the basic task of burping my baby was a tall order. Other than the care of your newborn, all fathers shouldn’t forget the rest of the home. Your wife will need your 100%, full-on support. After the Herculean task of growing and caring for a baby inside her, her body would have taken a beating and will be on the road to recovery for the next couple of months, or years even for some. You can expect her to become depressed, tired, and stressed out, but do not take this as a personal attack. Her body is going through changes, trying to restore her inner workings back to its normal state. Cook her a meal, especially her favorites, volunteer to watch over the baby at nights to allow herself to rest, clean the bedroom or even the rest of the house (or assign the household help specifically for which tasks) while you’re at it. One of the unique challenges that I’ve experienced is dealing with other family members. I use the word “challenge” quite loosely because I never imagined it to be an obstacle course full of hurdles. It’s nice to have your parents, siblings, and other members of the family get involved in taking care of your newborn and your wife, but you should learn how to put your foot down and lay out some limits. As the father, if you don’t take control, you will find some members of the family driving decisions that you should be making yourself. Make them understand that while you appreciate the helping hand, you are now living your own life and have a family of your own whom you are responsible for, 24/7. They may throw you pieces of advice, which you will accept with respect to them being family. Speaking from experience, this can be a hard pill to swallow for some, but this is reality and it can bite back if not taken with a grain of salt. Raising a family is not all chores, decision-making, health and welfare management. It’s also about fun—horsingaround with your wife and children, messing up the house and cleaning it up, eating out and shopping together, going to the beach, or having a picnic at a nearby park. In short, it’s about doing all sorts of things together. I find cooking both therapeutic and enjoyable, so my wife and I try to involve our kids from time to time. Even if you find yourself without the budget to go to the beach or somewhere with a pool, a rainy day becomes a great time for us to bond. We would spend an hour outside soaking up the rain. Even laundry day www.bcmag.ph
becomes a bonding activity—while my wife and I wash the clothes, our kids are right by our side watering the plants and each other! Having a family of your own means sharing your experiences and emotions with your wife and children, and they, in turn, get to share some of their own thoughts and emotions with you—which is the real essence of bonding. Through these experiences, you get to know more about them as they do you. I remember during my first week with my eldest, I took her outside the house one morning so she can catch some sun. I held her right by my chest and started talking to her. To my surprise, with her mouth she was able to reach out to my chest and tried breastfeeding! I jolted and laughed, and my daughter just sort of stared at me. She was so cute. I easily spend half a day at work and on the road, which gives me less time with my kids. For the past four years, I’m always itching to go home to my wife and kids. There was even a time when I had the luxury of working from home, which allowed me more play time with my kids. But unlike projects and managing clients, fatherhood has bigger responsibilities and heavier consequences, if not met. However, it is not without its perks. It’s literally THE project of a lifetime where there is no ceiling on the budget, endless “conferences,” and “one-on-one coaching” —and the rewards you get comes in each and every day you go home from the office. I found myself braving floods, traffic, and an endless deluge of commuters just so I can see my daughters smile, and sway them to sleep at night. I always have fans in my children and a strong support base in my wife. Becoming a father is easy, but being one is hard. Becoming a father can happen overnight, but being a father is a role of a lifetime. And so far, it has been an enjoyable ride, and I hope all expectant fathers get to share the same feelings I’ve had. bc
Thermal bag by PHILIPS AVENT, P1,270
GEAR UP, DADS! When stepping out of the house, make sure your bag is filled with basic baby necessities such as diapers, hypoallergenic wipes, tissue paper and cotton, a changing pad, stored breast milk or formula milk, baby bottles, and an extra set of clothes.
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reflections on single parenting One woman shares her insights on how to be both mom and dad to her little one Wo r ds b y M ONALISA C . DI M ALAN T A illus t r a t io n b y J e p r e n s o l i s
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ome people say that nothing can quite prepare you for parenthood. Whoever these people were—well, they were not in my circle. While I have heard rumors about what they supposedly said, I chose not to rely on their wisdom. In the last few years, I have found a newfound respect for them (these people, whoever they are!). I had my daughter when I already had an established career and was earning more than enough to pay the bills. I also have a decent portfolio of travels and adventures, and a treasure chest of deep, long-standing, and meaningful friendships that I have kept and nurtured over the years. I was also told (and must admit, believed) that I was a responsible and caring individual. I’d sometimes be
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referred to as someone with “maternal instinct,” a “nurturing quality” or “natural affinity with children.” All these— together with the constant support of my family—somehow emboldened me to assume that, at 36 and unmarried, I had it all figured out and was prepared to take on the challenge of taking care of and being responsible for another human being for the rest of my life. Little did I know that I was in for the ride of my life, one wherein the most effective way to keep from going over the edge is to always expect the unexpected. Yes, those people (whoever they are) were right on the ball: nothing quite prepares you for the role of being a parent, much less one of being a single mom or dad. While parenting is a daunting challenge to a couple (married people, or partners having children), solo parent-
ing is an adventure that strips you of all preconceived notions you have about control, fairness, and balance—all in a good way, mind you: I don’t think any experience can be quite as liberating as this. It’s no longer about me (thank God)…and yet the buck stops with me!
During my pre-motherhood days, I truly valued the freedom I had to travel anywhere (budget and work schedule permitting, of course). It was—for lack of a better word—simply sublime! Weekends existed as either a build-up or a hiatus until the next big trip, when the dilemma would be whether to spend a day at the office (yes, it was a choice!), at the spa or mall, do volunteer work, or launch into unplanned out-of-town www.bcmag.ph
P A RE N T H OOD trips with similarly single friends. Today, almost three years since I had my daughter, I can count with my fingers in one hand the number of times I have been out of the country, and all on work-related trips at that! There are still dilemmas over how to spend the weekend, but these would now be how to fit into 48 hours all the household errands, my daughter’s appointment with her pediatrician or dentist, a children’s party (or several parties!), shopping for new clothes because she has (yet again!) outgrown the set we just bought last month, and (if I really manage my time well) that much-needed haircut which I have long postponed. This has become my new normal—where my life no longer revolves around me or what I want or what I need. It simplifies a lot of things, as some choices are naturally eliminated, focus and priorities become clearer, and life in general is imbued with more meaning (Perhaps this is also because I never really imagined growing old with my life still being about me and only me). While it is natural for parents to desire and work at having a close relationship with the child, single parents often struggle with the relationship that the child would have with the nanny or whoever is the primary caregiver and with whom the child spends most of her waking hours. It is painful to accept that, since the solo parent also has to be the primary provider or breadwinner, spending time at work means spending less time with the child and probably missing out being present as the child achieves each milestone in her early years. Early on, I have realized and accepted that more than my bruised ego or heart, or the impression that other people would have about me as a mother or my relationship with my child, what really matters is that she is attended to when I am not around, and whenever she needs it, that she can count on a lot of people who love her. It is equally important that I nurture a special, unique bond with my daughter, and spend as much time as I can with her. I also make sure that she runs to me instead of another person www.bcmag.ph
when she is in trouble—but even if she does not, if she runs to her grandmother or her aunt instead, it is fine as long as she runs to someone who truly loves her with the same pure and unconditional love that I have for her. There is one reality that a single parent confronts at the outset: financially, emotionally, spiritually, intellectually, you are the person in this world responsible for this child, until she is able to pursue or provide for these on her own. There is no spouse or partner to expect additional income, emotional support or an extra hand from—and so it is crucial that you keep yourself healthy in all these aspects. Take better care of your job and try to maintain a steady disposition, obtain life and medical insurance (to the extent it can give at least some peace of mind) and pray that you are kept from harm, so you can continue taking care of this child. Faith, hope, and love
I am preparing for that day when she would start asking me all the difficult questions, by talking to her, reading up, asking others in the same situation, and praying (a lot!) that the grace will come as needed. In a perfect world, I still believe that a child is best raised in a family environment, with a responsible and loving set of parents, in a nice house located in a safe community. I am still traditional in that sense. Then again, in an ideal or perfect world, climate change and global warming are just ideas for a science fiction movie, and cancer would simply be a zodiac sign. So while the world still evolves into this perfect or ideal place, single parents like me, in the meantime, will continue to work towards providing a loving and safe home for our children, and raise them to become responsible individuals who will contribute something worthwhile to society. Without a doubt, couple-parents also work towards the same vision for their children every day. In that sense and in many others, there is not much difference between couple-parents and single-parents. It is just taking a while for society to catch on to this truth. bc
FLYING SOLO
With extra order of patience, please: TIME MANAGEMENT A single parent can use—aside from extra support and love from family, co-workers, and friends— an extra serving of patience. It rarely happens that things will go according to plan or schedule (count it as a good day when they do). Most of the time it’s not because of you, nor your fault (remember, it is no longer about you!), yet you have to somehow find a way to work around it and with what you have. (Good or bad, in my case, there is neither a father to blame nor vent my frustration out on!) RELATIONSHIPS It also takes patience to explain to your child that your home situation is different from what their classmates have, or what the school tells them, or what they see on TV or read in most books. For instance, it is really a challenge to explain why on Fathers’ Day (or Mothers’ Day), there is no “daddy” (or “mommy”) to greet or to whom she would give the nice card she made in school. YOUR OUTLOOK IN LIFE The single parent has to be patient with herself, too, and with the people around her, with her child, and with circumstance—overall, you can just imagine a whopping dose of patience everywhere! I honestly believe this single parenting ‘gig’ accelerated my acceptance that everyone is just doing the best they know how under the circumstances.
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been there, done that, flushed the potty in the process Training your child to go shouldn’t be a tedious task. Take it from this mom, who clears up the rumors about potty training and gives some useful tips on how to teach your child to make the move to the big seat W O R D S b y IAN V IC T OR p h o t og r ap h b y J e p r e n s o l i s
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arenthood. There are things that you relish— like the first words your baby utters, the first steps, and the first time they say “I love you.” Then there are things that you dread—like teething, their first high-grade fever, and toilet-training. Yeah, the crappy parts (yes, the pun was intended). However, it need not be a stressful time. Take it from me; I had to potty train three kids. In potty training, I had to look to different philosophers for guidance. My first lesson came from an old English proverb: “You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t force it to drink.” It’s the same thing with potty training. You can lead your child to the potty, but you can’t force him or her to go. The best way to start is to let the child be familiar with the toilet. Let your kid explore the
When do We start?
Potty readiness needs to be determined before you start training your child. Your child needs to be aware of the bodily functions before you even start thinking about potty training them. It’s a complex skill that we adults take for granted. Your child needs to be aware of the sensations of wanting “to go”. There must be awareness between what’s going on with his or her body, and understanding that these urges are signs for him to “go.” Don’t start them
toilet; show him or her what it does. Go through your toilet rituals with your kid. Remember that kids learn by watching adults. Don’t ruin the experience by selecting what you show your child. There was an acquaintance of mine who was having difficulty in potty training his kid. When I asked if he was showing his son what to do, he said that he didn’t want his son to see his “ding-dong,” so he just pretends to pee and then goes through the motion of washing his hands and so on. Dude, no wonder your kid’s still peeing in his pants—he thinks it’s the right thing to do! Just be honest: it’s a penis, and it’s used for peeing, among other things. Don’t get too graphic either and start explaining the other use for the penis. That, they don’t need to know about until they’re old enough.
too young. It’s not a parenting crime if your kid’s the only one in diapers in your playgroup. Some hyperparents try to potty train their kids at a very early age, thinking that it would result in an 8-month old baby who is an expert at using the toilet. That’s about as feasible as making the contestants on The Biggest Loser drop 75 pounds in 2 days (without the use of surgery, of course). You don’t want your kids to be talking about how they were “forced” to go potty with their therapist 30 years from
now. Take your cue from your kids. Observe them and if they start pulling faces when they poop in their nappies or if they start pulling on their nappies when it’s full or when they ask you to change them, it means that they’re aware of what’s going on and you can start with the training. When my twins started realizing that farts were funny and were trying to produce them on their own, I pretty much knew they were ready to go potty. Of course, I had to tell them that their farts were biolog-
Consider these tips
Toilet or potty training shouldn’t be such a traumatic experience for parent and child.
It’s about the attitude
It’s a partnershIp
You and your child need to work on this together. You can’t expect your kid to know everything immediately. Be patient. Make it fun! Bring books to read. Hey, you can even start two positive habits at one go! www.bcmag.ph
Don’t let pressure get to you. The more you force your kid, the more that they will resist. Avoid negative statements and avoid getting mad at your kid. Accidents happen, and I’m sure you’ve had your own share of accidents (Trust me, ask your parents). Encourage your kid and praise him but don’t make it too overt.
DON’T HURRY, DON’T WORRY
Every child is unique and manages through things differently. Just because your kid is still in his diapers at age 4 doesn’t mean you’re a bad parent. It just simply means that he’s not ready yet or may need more training. The idea that a good mother can toilet train their kid in three days at the age of 2 is just pure crap. (Yup, another intended pun).
be syMpathetIc
When you’re potty training them without any nappies, be Encourage your child sympathetic. Don’t to learn how to pull embarrass your child down his or her pants by making a big deal and underwear and out of it. Just say pull them up when “Oh, you’ve had an they’re done making accident. It’s okay. potty. While they’re Next time, the potty potty training, dress is just right here and them up in clothes you can use it when that are easy to pull you feel you need down and up. Leave to go, okay?” The the complicated child is embarrassed buttons, ties, and enough already, you frills for the Queen’s don’t need to add visit. to it. Make It easy for your chIld
Just remember Today, you’re training them to use the potty but in the future, you’ll be using diapers again too, so it pays to be nice to your kids.
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“The best way to start potty training is to let the child be familiar with the toilet. Let your kid explore the toilet; show him or her what it does. Go through your toilet rituals with your kid.”
ical weapons of mass destruction and should be regulated. the Gender Issue
There is that bit of myth that girls train faster than boys. The truth of the matter is, most of the time, it’s the mothers that get relegated as the potty trainer ergo, they feel more comfortable training girls, and girls tend to imitate mommy. It’s the gender assimilation process. My boys learned how to potty faster than my daughter did. They saw their sister going to the potty and wanted to feel “grown up” and so we went ahead with their training earlier than their sister. It was quite difficult for me to teach them how to pee standing up (contrary to popular belief and internet rumours that I am a hermaphrodite) and I had to ask for help from my uncles and male cousins. That’s another thing: Don’t be afraid to ask for help. If you’re a single mom and you have a son, ask the help of a male friend or a relative to show your son how to use the toilet. If you’re a single dad, ask your mom or your sisters to help. You don’t have to go through this alone.
the house they were. Have a formal introduction between your child and the potty. Let them play with it and sit on it with diapers and clothes. Having this sense of familiarity will help them appreciate and understand what that plastic seat is for. Don’t force them to sit on it or else they will resent it and will make your potty training even more difficult. When they started asking for the potty, this meant that they had control over their movements as they were waiting for me to bring the potty to them.
This meant that they were ready for the next step—the big seat. Don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater, though! The toilet seat may be too big for the kids to use yet. Personally, I used a slide-on toilet seat trainer and a low stool. You have to consider the other people who are using the bathroom. Using a heavily bolted on seat trainer with a step ladder attached to it may spell disaster for an adult who has the bad case of diarrhea—as what happened to an unnamed writer when someone forgot to take off the training seat from the toilet. bc
What should I use, a potty or the seat?
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Just like any tool, you don’t start with the big guns. You’re given the small saw first and then when you’ve proven you can manage it, you can go ahead and use the chainsaw next. It’s the same thing with toilet training. I used a potty chair first as it was convenient for us to lug it around and move it in every room that my kids were. There’s nothing more frustrating than looking for a darn chunky potty chair when your kid explicitly expressed that he or she needs to go. My Chicco Anatomical Potty was a godsend! It was light, sturdy, and cleaned easily. I let my kids use the potty wherever part of www.bcmag.ph
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y Chocolate melts at body temperature—a touch alone can start to melt it, so be careful when handling this sweet treat. The purer the chocolate, the faster it will melt down. Chocolate with emulsifiers will take longer to melt. Also, try other things to dip into your fondue; be as creative as you want and try dipping salted potato chips and dried fruits.
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Indulge your sweet tooth with this scrumptious treat you can do right in your own home p h o t o G R A P H S b y DIEGO J OSE RE C I P E S B Y CHOCOLA T E F IRE
you’re having a family reunion, planning a romantic home dinner for two with your hubby, or if you just want to make a quick yet delectable dish to serve to your brood, a fondue is a fun twist to your meal. “Fondue” comes from the French verb “fondre” which means “to melt.” This dish is usually made with melted cheese served in a heated, communal pot, where you dip small pieces of bread using long-stemmed forks. Today, one of the most popular versions is dipping fruits and biscuits in rich, creamy chocolate. Koby Parcell of Chocolate Fire shares with us how to whip up your very own home fondue dessert.
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J ust D e ss e r ts Writing With Chocolates What you will need: Home fondue set (Available at Gourdo’s) Tempered chocolate Greaseproof paper Masking tape Potato chips or strawberries
Hot Home Fondue
DIRECTIONS: 1. Prepare a home fondue set as previously indicated. 2. Dip a strawberry into the tempered chocolate, drizzle it by gently shaking left to right, and leave to set on greaseproof paper. 3. Meanwhile, take a piece of greaseproof paper and create a triangular funnel or cone. Stick the ends together with masking tape, making sure there is a tiny hole in the tip of the cone. 4. Pour in a small amount of melted chocolate and use this as your “pen,” with which you can create designs and write on plates, strawberries, potato chips, etc. 5. Once the chocolate on the dipped potato chips and strawberries are dried, you can write on them using your “pen.” Be creative and make different designs and messages— you can even let your kids help out in decorating. Leave it to dry before serving.
What you will need: Double broiler (You can improvise by using two small bowls with a stand with a candle underneath) Boiling water Pure chocolate slabs (white, milk, or dark—whichever you prefer) Assorted fruits like bananas, grapes, strawberries, apricots, marshmallows, nuts, and wafers—or anything you want dipped in steamy chocolate Food grade greaseproof paper How to Make a Hot Home Fondue:
1. Take a bowl and place it over the burner. Pour in boiling water. Take a clean, dry bowl and place it over the one with water, making sure that the water doesn’t get inside the bowl on top. Light the candle underneath the burner to keep the heat going. 2. Take some slabs of chocolate—the thinner the pieces, the easier they are to melt down—and break them into small pieces. Add the chocolate a little at a time, as it melts faster this way. Keep stirring as you add more pieces. 3. Cut your other ingredients, such as the fruits. You can even do fancy shapes with them. It’s better to cut things in bite-sized pieces, because fondue is all about sharing and enjoying it with others. Also, the more you slice, the more chocolate you get with every piece. 4. You can dip, drizzle, and eat your sliced fruits directly. 5. You can also opt for the chocolate coating to dry by dipping, drizzling, and laying down the strawberry on food grade greaseproof paper. For double dipping, dip, drizzle, and lay out the fruit or potato chip on the greaseproof paper and let dry before dipping again. www.bcmag.ph
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The award-winning Disney animated film is roaring back to the big screen in 3D! Relive the epic tale of Simba, who runs away with guilt of the death of his father. He meets up with the wacky Timon and Pumbaa, who teach him Hakuna Matata, a life of no worries. But Simba’s past comes back to haunt him, when his childhood friend Nala, tells him his uncle Scar took over the Pride Lands with the aid of the hyenas. It’s a journey of self-discovery as Simba returns to confront Scar and take his rightful place as king. Featuring the voices of Matthew Broderick, James Earl Jones, Whoopi Goldberg, and Moira Kelly.
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inspiring films
+ tearjerker movies...amazing collaborations...adorably delightful videos...
This latest big-screen lineup offers heartwarming stories for the whole family to enjoy
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Dolphin Tale
Moneyball
My Afternoons with Marguerite
An inspiring tale based on a true story, this film follows Sawyer, a young boy, who befriends an injured bottlenose dolphin called Winter, who lost her tail in a crab trap. Without her tail, Winter’s future is dire. Sawyer’s unwavering devotion motivates the people around him to band together and help save Winter, in this remarkable story of perseverance and rehabilitation. The upcoming film stars Nathan Gamble, Ashley Judd, Harry Connick Jr., and Morgan Freeman.
This true-story comedy-drama film is based on Michael M. Lewis’ book of the same name. Brad Pitt plays lead as Billy Beane, general manager of Oakland Athletics. Following Beane’s arrival, he attempts a new, non-traditional approach to scouting players, in order to prove that baseball’s conventional wisdom is wrong. Beane teams up with Ivy League grad, Peter Brand (Jonah Hill) and both embark on a baseball revolution to create a more competitive team.
A charming and sentimental movie about friendship and life’s encounters, the story is set in a small French town and follows Germain (Gérard Depardieu), a man in his 50s who is considered the village fool. He strikes up an acquaintance with the 95-year old Margueritte (Gisèle Casadesus) while walking in park. There are years and worlds of difference between them, but the two soon form a friendship that centers on books and words, and transforms their lives in more ways than one.
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FINE TUNES Check out these amazing collaborations that will melt your heart and make you groove to the beat “That Should Be Me” by Justin Bieber & Rascal Flatts
Teen-pop sensation and Justin Bieber pairs up with the leading country music band, Rascal Flatts in one of the most enthralling songs this year.
YOUTUBE MUST-SEES Tune in to these adorable and funny clips that feature the cutest babies and their lovable pet companions Cutest Wrestling Match Ever
Watch as this adorable baby and his cuddly cat “wrestle” each other to the brink of making his mom and his sibling laugh uncontrollably. Check out how this cat goes for another round of “roughhousing” with the little one. Crime Partners
“Heartbeat” by Nicole Scherzinger and Enrique Inglesias
Two of the hottest singers today collaborate in this latest single that’s sure to make your head bop to the rhythm.
“Beautiful” by Christina Aguilera and Beverly McClellan
“The Voice” coach Christina Aguilera and Beverly McClellan sing a very tender and heartfelt rendition of Christina’s hit single.
“The Yacht Club” by Owl City ft. Lights
From the group that gave us “Fireflies” and “Vanilla Twilight”, Owl City is back and has joined forces with Juno Award winner, Lights to give you this refreshing track.
William rummages through his dog Otis’ drawer for toys and finds the most annoying squeaky toy ever! As mom tries to hide it, in comes Otis looking for his favorite chew toy. William and Otis team up to get the brown ball out of the drawer, trying every way possible.
iPAD APPS Bring out the inner artist in your kids with these fun and free downloads Smurf’s Village
Build your own Smurf village from scratch by picking from characters: Papa Smurf, Smurfette, Baby Smurf, and Lazy Smurf. You and your kids can also play mini-games like Painter Smurf’s Painting Game and Papa Smurf’s Potion Mixing Game. Toy Story Read-Along
A fully interactive reading experience for your little ones, this application can help them settle down during long car rides and brush up on their reading skills. It includes games, movie clips, coloring pages, sing-along tunes, and lots of other surprises on every page.
“Out of Goodbyes” by Maroon 5 ft. Lady Antebellum
Bagging five wins at the 53rd Grammy Awards, country music group Lady Antebellum partners up with Maroon 5 in their current single, “Out of Goodbyes.”
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Virtuoso Piano
Discover music with this fun app by letting kids play the piano anytime, anywhere. This is perfect for kids to learn and practice the basics of the instrument while having fun. It has great sound quality, robust bass, adjustable reverb, and colorful key labels. { SEPTEMBER 2011 } b c PHILIPPINES
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best choices
Because there are too many options in the market, BC promises to scour and curate a fine selection of items for both parents and kids, with all types of budget in mind p h o t o G R A P H S b y M a r t i n Fa v i s , mark cabalang and jepren solis
Shuttle Imagination kidscraft playhouse Environmentally-friendly space shuttle playhouse made of 100% recycled cardboard with a sturdy drawing surface, P2,250, kidscraftusa.com
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PHILIPS AVENT DECT SCD 530 BABY MONITOR Relax with utmost comfort and security with Philips Avent SCD 530, featuring digital technology that alerts you to the slightest sound, a humidity sensor that monitors and keeps baby’s room comfy, and a 330m range that ensures secure reception in and around the house P10,699.75, SM Baby Co.
CETAPHIL MOISTURIZING LOTION Lotion that has a gentle formula that contains emollients and humectants that securely binds moisture to the skin, providing you with lightweight hydration all day. This fragrance-free moisturizer will safely keep your baby’s skin satin smooth, and does not contain lanolins or paragons P719, Watson’s
CETAPHIL CONTEST How do you keep your baby’s skin satin smooth? The 10 best answers win a gift pack with a canvass bag from Cetaphil! Email your answer and contact information to editor@bcmag.ph with the subject “Cetaphil Contest.”
STOKKE TRIPP TRAPP The best thing about this high chair (apart from its ergonomic, modern design) is that it can be used by children of all ages, and can carry an adult up to 300 lbs. The height of the seat is adjustable so even as your child becomes taller, the same highchair can still be used, keeping your baby secure and comfortable as he grows up P15,000, Rustan’s
OILATUM SOAP BAR Gentle cleansing bar that leaves a protective film after washing to lock in moisture, P95.25, Drugstores and supermarkets
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DAISY BY MARC JACOBS Top notes include wild strawberry, violet leaves, and ruby red grapefruit, with jasmine and gardenia, bound together by musks and white wood P4,098, Rustan’s Essenses
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best choices OK BABY DUCKA IN PINK Comfortable toilet seat that features maximum adherence and a robust structure, the Ducka has an ergonomic shape, which makes it comfortable for your little ones P1,495, Mothercare
SANDISK MEMORY CARD Capture your family’s most precious memories in an extremely portable and highly efficient SanDisk Extreme Pro SDHC UHS-I card. With its long-term reliability, you’re assured that every photo and video is kept safe SAFETY 1ST PACK ADVANCER
ESTÉE LAUDER IDEALIST EVEN SKINTONE ILLUMINATOR
The advance stroller features a fast, ultra-compact system that folds the handlebar in three movements, with locking side. Its four wheels are removable (the two rear wheels have brake control), and its padded seat with harness protection features a multiple-recline
Fast-acting serum that dramatically reduces the look of uneven skintone, including sun spots, dark spots, acne marks, and redness P5,450, Rustan’s
P24,999.75, SM Baby Co.
SM DEPARTMENT STORE They’ve literally got it all—from shoes (naturally) to grocery, home, personal care, and more, SM Department Stores offer a wide array of both local and international products and services in convenient locations nationwide
FRUTTI FROYO FROZEN YOGURT Satiate that sweet tooth without the extra fat. Plus, kids love picking out toppings that range from mints, mini marshmallows, nuts, mochi, fruits, and much more. Price varies according to weight Trinoma, Commerce Ave. Alabang
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MACLAREN NURSERY POLAR BEAR ROCKING HORSE Rufus the Polar Bear was created by designer David Netto, and is part of the Maclaren Nursery line. Features a gorgeous oak saddle and handles with white lacquer detailing amazon.com
PIGEON BOTTLE NIPPLE AND VEGETABLE CLEANER Never hurts to be extra clean, so keep your child’s baby bottles and nipples clean with this antibacterial cleanser that powerfully removes milk stains, but is gentle and safe for baby. It also doubles as a vegetable wash, and lasts for roughly 2 months P649.75, Watson’s
DAPHNE.PH Aside from being a mom and credible TV host, Daphne Oseña-Paez is also one of the country’s most trusted bloggers. Her engaging site tackles everything from stories about her three daughters, beauty tips, travel advice and more www.bcmag.ph
PATRICK ‘N FRIENDS HAND PUPPET AND DVD CARTOON Make playtime more enjoyable with this toy and DVD duo that enables you to get involved with role-playing activities with your little one. Explore five stories in the DVD, featuring fascinating animations P599.75, Toys “R” Us
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best choices 1. STRIDE RITE Every single shoe is made by specialists using the latest technology and the best materials, ensuring your kid’s safety, comfort, and healthy foot development. Comes in various designs your child will enjoy wearing Rustan’s
2. HAPPYBABY ORGANIC PUFFS IN APPLE FLAVOR Made with whole grains, these finger foods for babies are fortified with vitamins and minerals, and guaranteed to have no artificial flavorings P285, Numa The Organic & Eco Baby Store
3. STRI-VECTIN SD AGE LESS STARTER KIT Includes Retexturizing Scrub, Stretch Mark Cream, and Anti-wrinkle Eye Concentrate for smoother, firmer skin and renewed eyes. Helps make skin more resilient. Mommy likes! P2,300, Rustan’s
5. WEIL BABY 9 OZ. CUP IN BLUE/DARK GREEN Award-winning BPA/EA-free drinking cup made of Tritan with proprietary AirWave venting system and silicone spouts P819, Shop Familia
6. TEMPUR-MEDIC MATTRESS These mattresses conform to your shape even when you sleep in different positions, giving your body customized comfort and support P77,660 for single, Rustan’s
7. CHARLIE BANANA DIAPERS IN TUTTI FRUITTI Cloth diaper with a smart front panel that gives moms the option of tucking in disposable pads or reusable inserts P5,800 for pack of six, Shop Familia
4. PHYSIOGEL CREAM Produced with high-tech methods, Physiogel Hypoallergenic Cream delivers lipis and ceramics into the deeper layers of the skin to reduce moisture loss and provide a protecting skin barrier that achieves long-lasting regeneration P553.75 for 75 mL, Drugstores and supermarkets
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best choices MUSTELA DERMOCLEANSING GEL It’s easy to be obsessed with everything Mustela, as the brand is trusted for children and mothers worldwide. This soap-free cleansing gel for newborns is best for gently cleaning the body and hair P1,120, Rustan’s
THE BODY SHOP NATRULIFT SOFTENING FACIAL WASH Helps minimize the signs of aging and create a velvety-looking complexion with its pomegranate seed oil and antioxidants P995, The Body Shop
BRIGHT STARTS BUNCH-O-FUN ACTIVITY FRIENDS
GYMBOREE Their unique curriculum combines fun and learning to develop kids’ cognitive, social, and physical skills. Parents are involved in children’s activities, thereby creating a stronger bond. Their pre-school programs are also getting the nod from many discerning moms and pops. Greenbelt, Rockwell malls
FLORSHEIM KIDS Aside from the assurance of comfort and durability, you’ll find Florsheim’s shoes fashion-forward, adorable, and hip, SM MOA
Keep your little one entertained with this super cute toy that features crinkle, rattle ball, clacker links, teether, fabric accents, and bungee legs. Also includes multiple fabric textures and fun bright colors to explore P1,800, Toys “R” Us
BLACKBERRY PLAYBOOK We are in love with this sleek and compact tablet. It supports HD videos, video chat, and powerful apps. It has 10 hours of battery life and able to multitask apps effectively with its 1 GHz dual core processor ph.blackberry.com
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w ord s by Kar i z T ANYA Favis p h o t o g rap h s by mar tin and kariz TANYA favis st y lin g by K ar i z T ANYA Favis and XIE ANTONIO i n t er v iew by Valer ie AnnE Del Castil l o m a ke u p by U NO J U AN h a ir by FELI C IT Y SON
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YOU CAN SAY THAT THE ZUBIRIS SURVIVED A MEDIA AND POLITICAL CIRCUS LATELY—BUT NONE OF IT SEEMS TO MATTER NOW We were clueless to the kind of headlines this family would undertake just a few weeks after this photo shoot. It was a sunny and unperturbed Sunday afternoon then, and at the time, the handsome manof-the-house was still very much one of the esteemed legislators of this country. Former Senator Juan Miguel Zubiri is every bit the politician you expect him to be—gregarious with an honest smile and somewhat twinkling eyes, booming laughter, clean-cut hair parted to the side, and a genuine openness to meeting our crew. There is a lovely spread by the garden—delicious home-cooked fusili noodles with Bolognese, plus a generous helping of Baci Perugina chocolates (all my diet and candy restraint was thrown out the door). It felt like a home that’s used to entertaining guests who love to eat—certainly a dwelling after my own “taste.” This is the first time they permitted a publication to document their residence, Miguel tells us matter-offactly. Flattered by this trust, I express my gratitude, and we proceed to a brief tour of the first floor. It is surrounded by artwork—some of which cost the same as a vehicle or small house—but still remains the comfy type that you can plop yourself onto the inviting living room couch in.
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Audrey looks every bit the trophy wife you imagine her to be—exquisite, svelte, glowing alabaster skin, with an approachable disposition. Miguel asks us to step back inside the house while Audrey stays in the lanai to peruse her clothing choices, and have her hair and makeup completed. He gifted us with a thick coffee table book about his beloved hometown of Bukidnon, and guided us through its pages. Meanwhile, the cherubic little lady of the house (and Miguel’s look-alike), Adriana, was busy baking cookies with my daughters in their spacious kitchen. This helped her acclimate to the shoot. Their adorable younger toddler, Juanmi—who is, in turn, Audrey’s mini-me—is carried downstairs by their nanny, fresh from his nap. It’s obvious that these two children have their parents wrapped around their little fingers, as their very presence lights up Miguel and Audrey’s faces. It’s also because of this unassuming duo that Miguel’s recent resignation from the Senate became imminent, as their father did not want to tarnish their family’s reputation, nor bestow any grief to his loved ones. As Audrey eloquently wrote in her column for one of this country’s top broadsheets, “Children carry their parents names and decisions all throughout their lives, whether they like it or not. In other words, parents’ actions today, echo all throughout the future of their children. It’s our responsibility to make sure that the name they carry is not one stained by shame. It’s simply not fair to make them suffer the consequences of actions they have nothing to do with.” When all is said and done, there really is no greater institution than that tiniest unit that remains impermeable in our hearts.
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Juan Miguel Zubiri BC: Who did you look up to as a boy, and describe the relationship you had with your parents and siblings? M: Like many young boys, I looked up
to my father who has a very strong personality. He made sure that it was always family first. He was a politician in my teenage years already, but prior to that, he was running the Sugar Central in Bukidnon. I used to love it when he would take me on vacations there. We’ll have long walks in the fields and the forest. It is a very nice relationship, and something that I wish I could have with my own son in the future. I have a very close relationship with my siblings and parents—we share laughter and tears. We’re a very highly-opinionated family, so when we’re all together, it’s quite rowdy, in a nice way. BC: What are you most passionate about in public service, and how do you want your laws to affect people’s lives? M: My advocacies tend to revolve
around the environment, the cooperative sector, and food security in agriculture, because it’s my background—being an Agri-Business graduate with a Masteral in Environmental Science from U.P. Los Baños. I want these laws to be able to change people’s lives. I have laws on clean energy, renewal energy, and bio-fuels. The bio-fuels help sugar farmers all over the Philippines. They get to earn a decent living by coming up with an alternative to sugars, instead of just sugarcanes or raw sugar. We also passed the Renewable Energy Law which promotes geothermal energy with power, solar power, and hydroelectric power. I’ve also passed the Rent Control Act, which has been my baby ever since I was a congressman. Under this, the maximum is only a 10% rent increase per year. I used to board when I was studying in U.P. Los Baños, and I remember my neighbors in the next room were quite rowdy. The owners of the house wanted to keep them out, so they increased the rent by 200%, and it was unfair to the students who came
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from different parts of the Philippines. I was also the author of the Low Cost Housing Loan Condonation Program. Believe it or not, 90% of the families who owe low-cost housing from the government are delinquent. They can’t pay their dues on time because of the hardships of life. I had to come up with a law to condone all their penalties and surcharges, so they can go back again to being a non-delinquent member and be able to retain their homes. If I was not able to pass that two years ago, we’re looking at evictions from low-cost government housing projects which would translate roughly to 800,000 new squatter families. BC: How important is it for you to raise a family in a community that understands the balance of nature, and the importance of preserving it for future generations? M: At a young age I was exposed to
Bukidnon, when it was pristine or about 70% forest-covered. You’d see a deer walking into the backyard eating the flowers and the grass, and a wild boar drinking the water from the swimming pool. It was quite a wonderful experience which you would never see now. Some of them are already extinct. As a boy, I used to see tens of thousands of bats flying every afternoon on top of our house in a prairie in Bukidnon. Seeing all of those live in front of your eyes, then all of a sudden through the years, I never got to see these animals again. On my first year of college in U.P. Los Baños, I met my zoology teacher, Joey Baril, who explained the importance of biodiversity to me and that’s when I first joined the Haribon society. After joining all the meetings, I became a reformed outdoorsman, because I used to be a hunter. When I was a teenager, we had nothing to do in the province, so as a 15 or 16-year old boy, we’d be given a .22 long rifle, and then go out and shoot ducks, birds, pigeons and anything we can. Part of our doctrine is, if you shoot it, you must eat it or at least use it to feed a family. I remember there were three datus that actually brought in a pair of Philippine brown deer to my dad to make tapang usa. I begged my dad, “Dad, let’s not www.bcmag.ph
Adriana: Gold dress by right bank babies . Gold sandals by STRIDE RITE Juanmi: Red long sleeved shirt by KINGSLEY, Brown pants with skull by CHILDISH, Blue and orange shoes by PEDIPED, all from Shop Familia . Denim Jacket by ZARA BABY, model’s own Audrey: Dress by PORTS 1961, Stylist’s own . Necklaces, P1,595 and P435, both by FOREVER 21 On background: Timouth Station Take n’ Play Portable Railway by THOMAS & FRIENDS
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kill it. Can I just breed it?” There was one male and two females, and ever since then, I’ve been captive breeding Philippine brown deer in a facility in Maramag called the Philippine Park and Wildlife Center. We’ve produced a hundred deer, and we’ve donated to schools, towns, and cities that want to promote captive breeding programs for the relocations of these animals in their areas. BC: How did you get into Arnis? M: I was 16 when I got into it.
My first master was Master Edgar Sulite of the Lameco Art of Arnis. From then I moved to Grandmaster Tatang Illustrisimo and Master Christopher Ricketts and I joined competitions. If you see my web page or fan page in Facebook, you’ll see a video there of me winning my second World Arnis Tournament.
BC: And you represented the Philippines? M: Yes, I won the gold. I was the au-
thor of the law that created Arnis as the National Martial Art and Sport of the Philippines. It’s sad when you ask, “Oh, you want to take martial arts?” Right away, they will answer Taekwondo, Karate, Judo, Aikido. I mean no offense to all these martial arts, they’re all wonderful systems—but it’s not Filipino. Then when you say, “Why don’t you do Arnis?” They’ll say, “Ay, baduy ‘yan... Pang-masa ang dating.” But this same martial art is the same one that liberated us from Magellan, because Lapu-Lapu was an arnisador, a kali escrima practitioner. It’s the same martial art that the Katipuneros used when they defended our soil from the Spaniards and then the Americans, the same art that the Jurumentados were using in Mindanao, so it’s deeply-rooted in our culture. It’s also the fastest-growing martial art in the world. If you Google FMA or Filipino Martial Arts, you’ll see millions of sites and hits. The great Dan Inosanto was the Filipino-American teacher of Bruce Lee in Enter the Dragon, where he had two sticks practicing escrima. Even in modern films such as The Bourne Identity, Matt Damon uses Arnis. The one who teaches him is Jeff Imada who is also an FMA practitioner. In Sherlock
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Holmes, Robert Downey Jr. uses double sticks. BC: What other extra-curricular activities do you enjoy? M: I finally bought an elliptical ma-
chine. Instead of going to the gym, I’ve been working out once, or even twice a day. I’m trying to lose 20 lbs before December, and I still train with arnis.
BC: Let’s talk about your love for art and how it came about. What are your most prized possessions? M: Those that were given to me by
my grandmother. She had the opportunity to personally know people like Fernando Amorsolo, Manansala, H.R. Ocampo, and Joya. She had an extensive collection in her younger years, and I’ve been fortunate enough to get some of those. My grandfather, Dr. Manuel Fernandez, was one of the 5 or 6 founding members of Makati Med. He headed the dermatology department, so that’s how they were able to meet a lot of these artists. My grandmother was an art lover and that was passed on to my mother. I happen to have gotten that trait from them both—the appreciation of art.
home. How did you get a hold of the old church door from New Mexico? M: We moved into our new home a
couple of years ago. We bought this house and tasked a good friend of ours, Architect Pandy Lichauco to redesign it. We gave him our ideas and opened up some walls. We also put in a garden because it used to have a swimming pool, but since we have very young children, we were worried that the pool could cause a problem in the future—especially if we’re not around to watch the kids. One of them could just fall in! Most of the changes were cosmetic, so it was not very difficult to redesign. One of the unique features of our home is our antique front door, which we brought from our old house. My father got four of them from New Mexico. You could probably call it a “holy door,” because it came from an old church. It is estimated to be over a hundred years old. Many churches in the United States had to close down due to security [and] structural reasons, as many dioceses in those particular areas were afraid for their churchgoers that these old buildings would collapse.
BC: Favorite parts of the house? M: The living room is my favorite
BC: Did you inherit your mother’s painting talent? M: No, but I’m an amateur photogra-
pher. I’ve done two exhibits already, and I probably have an eye for it, but not the hand for painting, unfortunately. I wish I did.
spot. It’s got my art collection, and the most comfortable couch that anyone can have. I come home, play with my kids, and I crash onto the couch in the living room. ‘Di naman until the next day, I wake up just in time for dinner.
BC: Who decorates your home and how did you incorporate your personal touch to the look and feel of it? M: My wife and I have a joint decision
BC: Let’s talk about your personal relationship. Describe your proposal to Audrey, and how you got her to say ‘yes.’ M: My proposal, wow. The problem
on the design, but when it comes to the look and feel, I was able to convince my wife to have that old school, “country” feel. It’s more comfortable and inviting. My style is not modern at all. Coming from Bukidnon, we are used to having log cabins and kind of a “cowboy” feel, so you can probably see my home as having more of an Old English country house feel to it. BC: Tell us more about your beautiful
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that I had then was that, Audrey is 13 and ½ years younger than me. She was 21 years old when I proposed to her—and not all women her age want to leave their homes and settle down. Most 21-year old women want independence, an adventurous life, and a career. I was quite lucky when I proposed to her, and I guess it helped that she was already very mature in her mindset, since she is an only child. I first asked her mom’s permission if I
could ask for her daughter’s hand in marriage. Obviously, her mother was crying and crying, “She’s my baby, she’s my baby.” It’s different when you’re 30 years old, and your mom’s like, “Go away. Go.” But when you’re 21, it’s different, but I told her that I had nothing but good intentions for their daughter. I was worried because my wife was going to go abroad for a Master’s degree in the University of Complutense. It’s the U.P. of Spain. She was going for one year, and almost all of my friends told me, “Naku, if your wife is going to go to Europe, you can kiss her goodbye. She won’t come back. Mas pogi kahit ‘yung mga waiter doon sa ‘yo.” Napaisip ako, oo nga, guwapo lahat ng tao doon sa Spain and all that, so I took a chance. We were very much in love that time. We had a long honeymoon stage. I asked her to come with me to Boracay. She hesitated at first because her mom was very strict. For one year when we were dating, her mom was with us everyday, so it was really tough. When I did get the courage to ask her mom to allow me to take her to Boracay, it was to ask her hand in marriage. Audrey hesitated because she said, “No, my mom won’t allow me.” I told her, “No, your mom said it’s cool.” She couldn’t believe it. We planned the trip to Boracay but I actually flew her to Amanpulo. She was wondering “O, why aren’t we going to the airport? Why are we going to this hangar?” I said, “It’s a surprise.” She was so worried that my barkada will be in Boracay, we won’t be able to talk or have fun. We went to Amanpulo instead, and that’s where I proposed to her. BC: Can you tell us more about your first wedding, Manobo-style, and how the idea came about? M: I was the third term congressman
of Bukidnon at the time, and I wanted to thank the people and do a very traditional Manobo wedding in the province. We have seven tribes, and we are known for the IP (Indigenous People’s) culture. I decided to do that to say thank you to the people that I’ve worked with for 9 years, and whom my SEPTEMBER 2011 philippines
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“That was the last straw. I had an emergency family meeting and told them that I do not want to be a recipient of any illegal activity or electoral fraud, and that I am willing and ready to resign.”
father’s been working with for the last 25 years—at least make them part of one of the most important days of my life. We had 25,000 people there. I’ll give you a book of Bukidnon—the pictures are all there, and it was a production. The mayors helped out in feeding everybody. We had 20,000 packed lunches and I called the local Jollibee and asked them to make 5,000 more cheeseburgers. It was an open wedding where everybody could attend and eat, and the whole province was invited. Thank God only 25,000 attended— considering we have a million people in the province—since it would have been a disaster if half of that attended. There’s only a few people who could actually say that they had two weddings. BC: You mentioned your 13-year age difference. How has this played a role in the success of your marriage? M: I think it plays a huge role. I truly be-
lieve women mature earlier than men, and that men are always little boys in their hearts. When you’re an older man, you have a lot of patience in the relationship. Of course, as a younger person, you tend to be more makulit, or headstrong. Whenever we have arguments, my wife and I never get into shouting matches. Basically, it’s me being very, very quiet, and we argue a little bit—that’s about it. There’s a saying that I heard, “It’s better to be an older man’s princess, than a younger man’s slave.” My wife has always been my princess.
BC: Describe your relationship and how has having kids changed the way you see her? M: Our relationship is one of trust and
understanding. When she married me, she married a politician. So from day one, I would tell her, “Mahali—we call each other that—you know the life that I live, and I’m sharing myself with not only with you but with hundreds of thousands of constituents, and millions of people. It’s a life shared with the public.” It’s also a life of commitment—to go around, do my duties, visit constituents; therefore I will be
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out a lot, but just working. I think that’s why it didn’t work out with my previous girlfriends, because they did not understand where I was going, why I had to do it, who I’d be with. They’d be either very clannish, protective, or demanding that I be around them all the time. Audrey is the best partner I can ever have. If I tell her today that I’m flying tomorrow for work for a couple of days, she will never complain. She would say, “Go, do what you have to do.” BC: How has your relationship changed after having children? M: It’s really effective time manage-
ment that changed my life. Having kids has made me realize how important it is to make necessary changes for a better country, for a better nation, for a better tomorrow for them. When I was single, c’est la vie. I didn’t really give a damn what was gonna happen the next day. I jumped out of planes, took up parachuting, bungee-jumped, and was a rescue diver. I wanted to be a dive master, live off a boat and go diving all over the world. When I got married, we’re like, “Hey, I gotta take care of myself.” Audrey always reminds me of this. I’m 42 and she’s turning 29, so that means I have less time in this world to spend with my children. Sometimes I envy the guys who get married at 25 and have children at 26, because now they’re enjoying their children as teenagers. I’ll be enjoying mine as teenagers when I’m 60, so I’ll be like their lolo. I’m going through a strict regimen of training and diet, except I broke it today. (Smiles) I drink less alcohol to save my liver. I try to eat less fatty foods. I’m taking maintenance vitamins and all that. Before, I thought I was like Superman. BC: What was your reaction when you found out you were going to be a father? M: Oh, I was so happy! I’ve always told
myself—and my friends have always told me—that I’d be a great father, because I really love kids. As a matter of fact, I’m a kuya to everybody. When I found out that Audrey was pregnant, I let out a big scream, and gave her a big hug. It was I who insisted that she was www.bcmag.ph
Audrey: Lilac dress by JOEL ESCOBER, Price available upon request . Ring by FOREVER 21, P365 Juanmi: Kent short sleeved polo by PERIWINKLE JR., P725 . Jacket by RIGHT BANK BABIES, and white pants by BoBINETTE, both from Shop Familia . Shoes by STRIDE RITE, P365 Adriana: Pink dress with lollipops and striped tights, both by GIRLFRIENDS BY ANITA G., Jacket by EDEN’S BOUQUET, both from Shop Familia . Gold wedge sandals by BABY FASHIONISTAS
pregnant. I had come from Bukidnon, I’d eaten durian, but that was in the morning and it was already evening and I brushed my teeth, took a shower, yet she could still smell the durian. She kept saying, “No, I’m not pregnant.” And I said, “Sweetheart, unless you have super human senses, you cannot, because I cannot smell the durian.” She says, “I can smell it. You get out of the bed because it’s driving me crazy.” She had a hard time accepting at first that she was going to be a young mom www.bcmag.ph
at 23. I had a yaya buy a pregnancy test. So there it was, the first pregnancy test, two lines, and I said, “Yay! She’s pregnant!” She didn’t believe it, so she took another test. That was one of the happiest moments of my life. BC: Describe your fatherhood style, and whom you look up to in parenting. M: (Ponders) For parenting style, since
we’re a ‘hug and kiss’ family, I’ll show you. [To Juanmi] “I’m gonna get you!” [Gets Juanmi from yaya and showers
him with hugs and kisses] “Laway, laway, laway!” [Kisses him some more] He’s gonna run away... [Talks to Juanmi] “You’re such a pogi boy.” I’m just gonna retire and just make him an artista. He’s so cute. We’re a hug and kiss family, and I got that from my dad and mom because they’re very affectionate. I’m afraid to admit it, but it’s true that I’m a mama’s boy, because my mother had two miscarriages before me. That’s why my gap with my older brother is five years. SEPTEMBER 2011 philippines
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BC: And you’re the youngest son? M: Yes, there are two older boys,
myself, and then two younger girls. It’s my mother who does the disciplining. My dad would be the one who’d put his foot down, if need be—and you know how dads are when they do that, everybody stops and listens.
BC: Favorite family traditions? M: Sundays we spend with our
family. With Audrey’s mom, it’s Sunday lunch. With my mom and dad, it’s dinner. I will continue to do that even when I’m older. We share our experiences, whether it’s sad or happy, and actually
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it was in one of those Sundays that I decided to quit my job—it’s in one of those weekly meetings where the most important family decisions are made. BC: Last movie you saw?
M: Harry Potter, and I enjoyed it extremely. Audrey and I had an opportunity to actually meet Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson, and Rupert Grint. When we got married, we got a chance to go to England and one of Audrey’s relatives worked in the film. We were able to get a free pass to watch them shoot, and it was an amazing experience. Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to www.bcmag.ph
take pictures with Dan and those guys, because we weren’t allowed to take our cameras out of our bag while they were filming. BC: What would you recommend that your kids read or watch? M: I like biographies. The last book
I read was about Nelson Mendela. I saw the movie about him, Invictus, and what amazes me about this man is how he was able to unite the country, instead of setting it on fire. That is the kind of leadership that I would like to see for our country. We have so much—EDSA 1, EDSA 2—all these hang-ups about different administrations. Can’t we move forward from that, and actually look forward to a more positive future?
BC: Speaking of politics, what are the things that factored in your decision to suddenly resign from your position? M: My children. Family should always
be first. God first, then family, and whatever business you’re doing. I value and look kindly to a man who values his family first. I always say when I do graduation speeches, “What good is a man who is admired by millions, but is hated by his own home?” As I mentioned in my [resignation] speech, I am a husband first before a Senator, a father first before a legislator. I didn’t want any dirt attached to my family name. As I said in my speech, power, position, and wealth would never replace honor, dignity, and integrity because you leave that to your children and to your family. It was difficult for me to go. There was part of the population that liked me because I was hardworking, and I had no controversies, no scandals. I gave projects, and I was approachable. But there was this other part of the population that thought at the back of their minds that, “Did he really win? Was it Coco Pimentel? Did he cheat in Maguindanao? Was he a beneficiary?” Even among friends of mine, they’d ask, “How’s the case? How’s the problem of yours in Maguindanao?” It was quite irritating, and it became difficult to focus on my actual job. When these two witnesses www.bcmag.ph
came out, Bedol and Ampatuan, whom I consider very credible—one is the Governor of the Autonomous Region of Muslim Mindanao, and the other one is the election officer of Maguindanao—stating that they manipulated the vote to credit or to help Team Unity to win—and ultimately myself—because I was the last one to come in as number 12 in the Senate. That was the last straw. I had an emergency family meeting and told them that I do not want to be a recipient of any illegal activity or electoral fraud, and that I am willing and ready to resign. We decided on the date, and we discussed this with our lawyers. That’s how it happened, and everything else is history. BC: Best advice your family gave? M: Follow your heart, your conscience.
The day before I actually resigned, my father had come here and he told me, “I believe, Migs, that God is testing you.” He says, “God is showing you two roads to take [gestures with hands]: One is the right path, which your conscience is telling you to follow; the other is the path of power, fame, and fortune. If you take that [gestures the second path hand], God will eventually punish you, and you will pay for what you have done, because deep in your heart, you know that it is wrong. If you take the right path [gestures the first path hand] and follow your conscience, God will reward you. It may not be position, wealth, nor fame. God will reward you maybe with a happy family, peace of mind.” You know, so much happiness can come from peace of mind. And the health benefits are immense, because stress can kill. Like in a car, if you put too much weight on the car, that’s stress to the axel and the car itself, you’ll break it down. The same goes with people.
BC: How is your family dealing with it right now? M: Oh, they’re all so happy! You know,
it was difficult because there was a time that every week, there would be a bad article written about me in the newspapers—whether it’s an editorial,
or by a columnist. It didn’t help that Ampatuan and Bedol came out saying that I was the beneficiary of cheating, and that I was a fake Senator and all that. My mother was crying every night. She was heavily-medicated because she has a tumor in her brain. She had two major operations, and she still has a tumor in her brain—which is benign but expanding—so it gives her pain every so often. To add to her physical pain was the emotional pain, seeing her son being attacked everyday. My father felt guilty because he felt that it was his fault for bringing me into politics. Seeing all this pressure, he felt really sorry for me. My wife was also very anxious and jittery because of all this bad publicity that we were getting. It came to a point that we didn’t read the newspapers and watch TV anymore, because it was just excruciating. When we made the decision to resign, it was a big sigh of relief, so much so that we became “bulletproof.” Two weeks prior to resigning, every issue, statement, and attack on me didn’t feel anymore as important, damaging, or as hurting as it was several months ago. The funny part was, everyone I spoke to—from lawyers to media practitioners, PR people and politicians—they were saying, “Don’t resign because it’s committing political suicide; that in this country, nobody will understand your resignation. If you resign, you’re guilty.” We’re not like the US, Japan, or Korea, wherein if you resign, it’s an honorable exit. Here in the Philippines daw, it’s the exact opposite. So the pressure was really on me. Would I be doing the right thing, in terms of my political career or in terms of my family? BC: You went through very confusing times… M: Until I had that talk and discern-
ment with my father—and after a lot of prayers. What I really want to share in this story is that us GenX-ers—who are 30 to 50 years old right now—it’s our time to do what is right for our country. We know the problems; we saw the problems already with the baby boomers. They couldn’t solve it, but we SEPTEMBER 2011 philippines
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“When our children are old enough, we want them to see that we ‘sheltered’ them in the best way we knew how, which is by keeping clean and making sure that the name they carry would be one they could stand up in and be proud of.”
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Audrey: Red bandage top and purple skirt both by IM-HM . Necklace, P555, Ring, P495, both by FOREVER 21 Juanmi: White polo by RIGHT BANK BABIES, Khaki pants by OILILY, both stylist’s own . Navy and red shoes by FLORSHEIM KIDS Adriana: Purple dress by BABY FASHIONISTAS . Pink mary janes by FLORSHEIM KIDS Shot of Bukidnon and wedding photos from Zubiri’s Bukidnon book
know the solutions. We just have to follow it through. If my generation cannot solve the problems of our country, then shame on us. I told myself that I’d rather be part of the solution than the problem. By resigning and making that ultimate sacrifice, we’d hoped to show to the people that there are still politicians with delicadeza. I’m going to go through a re-election exercise. Everyone was telling me, “How can you be re-elected? You’ll be a civilian.” I said, it’s not a matter of just being civilian or a politician; it’s a matter of clearing your name and clearing the institution. I did not want to stain the name of the Senate of the Republic of the Philippines. As part of my speech, I said, “The institution was suffering, and so was the people.” They’re divided in this issue. I decided to let go, and that’s one of the best decisions I’ve made in my life. BC: Have you encountered naysayers while you’re out with your wife and kids? M: Actually right now, it’s the oppo-
site. Before I resigned, we’d see one or two people staring and not smiling. (Laughs) I’m a very amiable guy. I smile and say “hi” to everybody. I know how it feels when I smile or wave to someone and he’s not reacting, or he’s looking at me badly. I was thinking, “Okay, this is one of the guys who probably don’t like me or are questioning my legitimacy as a Senator.” Now it’s the exact opposite. I’ve got people coming up to me from the street. After lunch in a restaurant last Sunday, a young man by the name of Carlo came up to me and said, “Wow, you’re a breath of fresh air! We’d like to thank you for what you did. You gave hope to us young people that we have at least decent politics in the future.” And I’m like, “Were you in the restaurant? Because I didn’t see www.bcmag.ph
you.” He says, “No, Sir. I was driving. I saw you walking out and I parked the car.” His car was on ‘hazard’… BC: (Laughs) On the street? M: On the road, and he ran
to me just to shake my hand. I thank God for that because at the back of my mind, I thought it was going to be political hara-kiri. Right after I resigned, we had other resignations. A week after I stepped down, the lady head who was in-charge of the art exhibit at the CCP also resigned. And another week after that, Secretary Bert Lim of the DOT resigned as well. (Laughs) I hope I sort of brought up the bar for public service, because now people can say, “If he’s doing a terrible job, why doesn’t he just do a Migs Zubiri?” I’d be very proud if they use me as an example for those who need to step down out of delicadeza. It’s actually the first time in the history of the Senate—the highest elected position—that anyone actually resigned from his post, due to a controversy out of delicadeza. I mean, you have barangay captains who win questionably in polls, and they stick to it all the way, take it to the Supreme Court, to hell and high water, damn the torpedoes, full-speed ahead, they won’t step down. BC: Worst rumor you heard about the situation, and how did you handle it? M: People saying that I was a cheat. But
if you get the facts straight, you’ll notice that it was these people cheating for Team Unity, and I was an unwitting beneficiary. That’s why in almost all my press conferences in the past, I said, “If it was proven that I was a beneficiary of cheating and it helped me
win the elections, I would step down.” To answer the second point, about how I dealt with this nasty talk, was to resign. Instead of being deadma—because politicians are deadma, without saying who these people are—politicians can be attacked, vilified, and crucified, and they’ll say, “Oh, it’s okay, I’m not hearing anything. I’m gonna stay in position.” And even if his or her post is threatened, they’ll take it all the way to the Supreme Court, file a TRO, I mean, what for? BC: All that effort. M: It’s the public
trust. If the people don’t like you anymore, it’s time to go, and that’s the mindset that I had. If I was a cheat, I would’ve exerted all my power and opportunity and legal means to stay in power. Why will I do an illegal act to put me into power and then just give it up? If that is how I won—through this electoral fraud committed by these two very powerful, influential families and individuals— then I’d rather step down and seek a fresh mandate from the people. BC: Speaking of that fresh mandate, I heard you’re running in 2013. M: I think that I have to take it back
to the people. It’s not fair to myself if I don’t run. People might say I’m politicking but it’s really the only way to redeem myself from all the bad publicity that I got the last four years because of Maguindanao. I consider what happened in Maguindanao a bangungot, and I’d like to put that behind me. With the four years that I’ve been there—hindi naman sa pagyayabang—I’m the most prolific in terms of the legislation. I helped sponsor and SEPTEMBER 2011 philippines
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author as Majority Floor Leader, 651 measures. I authored and sponsored in Plenary, 35 of the 90 national measures. The rest are all local measures. I’ve had perfect attendance since 1998. Sick or not, measles or not, I was in session. If you notice, even in my tenure in the four years, I wasn’t involved in all these investigations, you’ve never seen me attacking or insulting a man on TV and making him cry. They can never accuse me of grandstanding. I’d like to be known as a hard-worker in the Senate, willing to make the ultimate sacrifice for the ultimate change. BC: What are your plans now that you’ve stepped away from the Senate? M: Take a vacation. (Laughs) My
wife and I are planning to take the whole September off, and then we’re planning to launch a movement called the “Eco Warriors Movement.” We’re gonna tie up with the DENR and DepEd, and get volunteers. We’ll be the eyes and the ears of the DENR looking out for illegal activities like poaching of animals, cutting of trees, mining, or even smoke belchers. Everybody now has a camera phone, so they can either tweet, or take a video and upload it on our Facebook site. They now have a Shame Campaign, which will be taken to the DENR for appropriate action. Hopefully we’ll be able to launch it by November, and we’re gonna do a nationwide roadshow for that program. We’re not just armchair warriors, we’re eco-warriors. We go out there, we do something. We make a difference. Audrey Tan-Zubiri: BC: Is it true you are of British, Chinese and Filipino mix? How were you raised?
A: Yes, I’m all mixed up like a good ol’ halo-halo! But I was raised 100% Filipino. I came from a conservative family, so when I was growing up, my parents were very strict with me. I had a memorable and happy childhood because we were a close-knit family, and I spent all my free time with my
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parents, which is why I am so close to my mom. BC: What was it like growing up in an all-girls’ school? Would you like your daughter to go there as well? A: Yes, Adriana is definitely going to
an all-girls’ school! I went to Assumption for most of my elementary before I moved to Poveda for the rest of it and high school—and I loved it! There were no boys to distract us from our schoolwork, nor interfere and break up friendships. Some of the godmothers of my children are girls I’ve known since I was 6. Also, being away from boys allowed us to just be ourselves everyday—whether that meant coming to school with zit cream on your nose, or being as loud and funny as you wanted to be. It’s great for a girl to grow up feeling completely accepted for who she is, so that when the time comes to meet boys, she’ll be secure and confident enough with herself and won’t be pressured to change or anything like that. BC: You were a VJ and a model, now a businesswoman, writer, wife, and mother. What was the transition like? A: The transitions were all very smooth.
I was a model first before a VJ, which helped me be completely at ease in front of the camera. After college, I felt it was time to do something different, so I exchanged my modeling and VJ days for a year abroad for further studies, before coming back home to marry Migs. Growing up, I watched my mom balance work and her family very well, so I couldn’t imagine not trying to do the same. Shortly after I got married, I went into business as well, which worked for us because having my own business meant I was in charge of my time, so I could still be around for Migs when he would come home, or anytime he needed me. When I had my kids, I found myself with a ton of stories, experiences and lessons learned. I felt it would be great if I could share all these things with other new moms out there and fortunately, I was offered the opportunity to do so as a weekly writer for the parenting section of the
newspaper. At first, I was worried that I would run out of things to write about, but on the contrary, having kids means that there’s always something new and exciting to discuss in an article. BC: Can you tell us more about your business ventures? A: I have two franchised branches
of a fast food chain, and I build and sell homes. I can say that construction is something that I always thought I would end up doing because my parents were in that industry, but the restaurants just kind of happened lately. They seemed like good investments so I thought, why not?
BC: What was it like studying Communications and Economic Sectors in Spain? A: Studying in Spain is different from
studying in the Philippines in so many ways. One of them would be the student-teacher relationship. It’s so casual there and they relate to one another like peers, rather than mentor-student. Then there’s the environment. Their cafeterias served beers in the vendo machine, and you could order whiskey with your Coke at the drinks area. That was a big shocker to me as I came from Ateneo, where if I’m not mistaken, you could get expelled for drinking on campus. BC: What items do you like shopping for your children? A: I love shopping for their clothes—
I enjoy dressing them up. But more than clothes, I love buying them costumes! Bunny rabbit, Wonder Woman, Spiderman, cowboy, Korean/Japanese/ Chinese/Spanish national attires, Disney princesses, ladybug, you name it! I get a real kick out of seeing them in all these funky little costumes on a regular day. Going back to a more normal level, I also buy them a lot of books. I rarely buy them toys—that’s their dad and grandparents’ specialty. BC: What are your mommy wardrobe staples and must-haves? A: Flats and big bags. I used to love
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cute little purses. However, now that I am never without a child in my arms and another hanging on to my leg, I have come to appreciate the comfort and safety of walking in flat shoes. As for big bags, when you’re carrying an extra change of clothes, diapers, bottles and Barney, you don’t really have a choice, so you may as well search for the most passably fashionable, big bag you can find. BC: Can you describe your second wedding? A: Our church wedding in Tagaytay was
just as special, as we pledged our love and fidelity to one another in front of God, and our family and friends. There was a storm that night, but that didn’t stop us from dancing until the sun came up! The best part of getting married twice is being able to tell the man you love that you will spend your whole life with him over and over again.
BC: Tell us more about your Hannibal Laguna wedding gown. A: I knew I didn’t want to wear a
sexy gown on my wedding. I also didn’t want the gown to be too trendy or dated. I wanted something elegant, and I am so glad that I got that in the gown he created for me.
BC: How do you divide parenting duties with your husband? A: Migs and I have very different person-
Audrey: Dress with polka dots by CHRIS DIAZ, Price available upon request . Bangles by FOREVER 21, P435 . Fascinator, Stylist’s own
alities and lifestyles. Because of this, the division of parenting duties just naturally happened without us having to discuss it. For instance, Migs is quite the spoiler and comes from a more liberal background, so he’s the good cop. On the other hand, I’m more on the strict side and so daily discipline duties fall into my bad cop territory. BC: What were your pre-conceived notions about motherhood before you had any kids? A: Before having children, I used to wor-
ry about losing myself when I would become a mother due to the changes that would come with it but now that I am one, it has even helped me find myself even more. I have become more certain www.bcmag.ph
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Audrey: Halter top by FOREVER 21, P915 . Black skirt by TINA DANIAC, Price available upon request . Bangle, P685, Ring, P283, both by FOREVER 21 Adriana: Mustard ruffled dress, Shop Familia . Black shoes (on the seat) by BABY FASHIONISTAS, P1,099
of who I am, and what kind of a person I should be. The fact that I am raising children makes me look at my life more closely. Does my life reflect the things that I want my kids to see and absorb as they grow up? I make sure that it does, in everything I do, whether in the small things, like my manners, to the big things like living your life for others. BC: What have you found out about yourself now that you are a mother? A: I found out that I’m a whole lot more
like my mother than I ever thought I would be.
BC: Your kids, Adriana and Juanmi, are 22 months apart. What are the challenges of raising two young children at the same time? A: In the beginning, I felt like I was con-
stantly running back and forth between one child and the other, but never able to fully give either one the complete attention he or she deserved. I felt so guilty to Adriana who suddenly had to make do with only half of my attention, whereas before, she had me completely all to herself. I also felt the same guilt towards Juanmi who was receiving only half the attention I used to give his sister when she was his age. Eventually, I got over this guilt especially when I saw
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how they would interact with one another. It is such a beautiful gift for the two of them to grow up together, and I see this proven every time I see them laughing together. Now, the challenges are more on the logistical side—like how to carry both kids when one gets jealous of the other! BC: What are your favorite bonding moments with each child? A: Adriana is like my little best friend.
She goes with me everywhere and we have so much fun together that every ordinary moment becomes a bonding moment—whether we are simply choosing items at the grocery, lighting candles in church, or buying a birthday gift for one of her friends’ birthday parties. At home, our favorite activities together are singing, dancing, reading, telling stories and baking. On the other hand, Juanmi is like my little boyfriend. I get all giggly like a high school girl with just one smile from his handsome little face. Our bonding moments come from more specific events such as his bath times, swimming lessons, singing and dancing together. I also take him to the park frequently where we chase each other around, and I take him on the swings and slides. BC: What is your favorite mommy duty and why? A: Putting my kids to sleep, especially
when they were babies. I loved the feeling of having a baby’s little heart beating right on top of yours as they peacefully sleep on your chest. Now that they are bigger, putting them to sleep is still my favorite mommy duty as nothing comes close to that feeling of peace and serenity that you get lying side by side with your children and watching them sleep, especially when they snuggle up to you. Heaven!
BC: How do you celebrate birthdays? A: With lots and lots of cake and ice
cream!
BC: What are your funniest and most embarrassing moments as a mom? A: Oh gosh, where to begin? Just today,
I took Adriana to her ballet class at 4 www.bcmag.ph
p.m., only to be met by the class on their way out as apparently, class was at 3 p.m.! Then of course, there are the classic crying and screaming moments in churches, airplanes, and swimming lessons. Those days when one of my kids went through a phase of not wanting to kiss anyone? In a culture like ours, that was probably the most embarrassing, as I struggled to make them kiss their elders while they screamed in protest. Thank goodness that’s over! BC: Speaking of protest, how did you react when you first heard about the allegations on your husband’s candidacy? A: I was very hurt by the things that
some people were saying and writing. I knew that the man they were trying to depict him to be was nothing at all like the real Migs.
BC: How did you react to your husband’s decision to resign from his senatorial post? A: Many were shocked by it, but to
be honest, I wasn’t surprised at all. In the beginning, I was saddened that it had to come down to that level, but I wouldn’t expect anything less from my husband. I have never been more proud of Migs. BC: Now that your husband is no longer in office, we heard you’re taking the whole September off to travel. A: I’m still not sure as to where we will
be going, because traveling with kids involves so many factors to consider! The weather, how child-friendly the place is, what kind of family-oriented activities and places does the country have, and so on. BC: Being a public figure, controversies are not uncommon to your husband. How do you shelter your children from these? A: I am very fortunate that our kids are
still too young to understand what is going on around them. But just the same, even if they are too young, I don’t let them suffer the brunt of it by letting it affect their lives. I guess you could say that I shelter them by striving to let them continue living their lives as normal as possible. No matter what
we may be going through, I make time to take them to their ballet, swimming, study periods, art activities and to their playdates, as planned. We firmly believe that the best way to shelter our children from political controversies is to avoid them altogether. If something is not right, then we won’t allow ourselves to be a part of it. That is the reason Migs chose to step down from the Senate. One day, when our children are old enough, we want them to see that we “sheltered” them in the best way we knew how, which is by keeping clean and making sure that the name they carry would be one they could stand up in and be proud of. BC: In what ways do you share your husband’s passion for public service? A: I share in his passion for public ser-
vice in family and health campaigns, most especially those for children. I was always a part of our medical missions and had my own nutrition programs. I actively serve on the board of a number of foundations such as Bantay Bata, where we focus on the Pediatric Heart Patients; ISS or International Social Service, which seeks to protect and aid our OFWs and the families they have left behind here; as well as the Abilympics, Philippines, which is an organization which sends speciallyabled Filipinos to the Special Abilities Olympics held every 4 years.
BC: What values do you want your children to acquire from their dad? A: I would be so happy if they could
be even just half as strong and brave as their father is when it comes to facing difficulties and challenges. Migs is a man who would never back away from doing what is right, no matter what it takes. I pray that my children acquire the same courage and that they also learn to have the same sense of morality that does not tolerate any form of injustice. And while we’re at it, I am so proud of how humble and kind Migs is. I hope that our children will grow up to be just like him in that sense. Again, if they can have even just half as much of these qualities from their dad, then I know they will be OK. bc
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STYLING BY KARIZ TANYA FAVIS PHOTOGRAPHS BY MARK CABALANG GRAPHICS BY JEPREN SOLIS
STYLING ASSISTANT Valerie AnnE Del Castillo
Kick off the 窶話er months with these fashionable ensembles for your little dolls
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Daniel: Hendrix Fleece Sweatshirt in Dark Yellow by LITTLE MARC JACOBS . Pagity pants by DIESEL . Camouflage rubber shoes by QUIKSILVER, all available at Shop Familia On background: Metal lunch box by PAPERTRAIL, P2,210
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Natalia: Plum jacket by EGGI KIDS . Harpy in Rock Lobster by LITTLE MARC JACOBS . Goluwy Gonna by DIESEL KID, all from Shop Familia . Ivory Mary Janes by FLORSHEIM KIDS, P1,599.75
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Mariana: Babies’ Organic Cotton Bodysuit Rib by B NATURE . Pink Pettiskirt by KAIYA EVE . Metallic Silver Slipper Booties by YO MY BOOTIES, all from Shop Familia
Llewellyn: Tetiry t-shirt by DIESEL kid . Pantalone by PETIT BATEAU . Flex Toddler Leather Sneaker Jake White by PEDIPED, all from Shop Familia
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Joseph: Golf cap by FORE!! AXEL AND HUDSON, P850 . Rainer short-sleeved polo in white, P675, Raine slacks in black, P925, both by PERIWINKLE JR., Loafers in lime green by FLORSHEIM KIDS, P1,499.75
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Natalia: Pearl necklace with pink ribbons, Fabulous Life of Barbie in Pink both by BARBIE, P799 . Silver ballet flats with sequins by FLORSHEIM KIDS, P1,299.75
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Ella: Black knitted beanie with pink flower by COUTURE CLIPS . Senai Felpa jacket by DIESEL KID, Lollipop multi dress by HULA STAR . Celestina Pink Shimmer by LIVIE & LUCA, all from Shop Familia
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Llewelyn: Tetiry t-shirt by DIESEL KID . Pantalone by PETIT BATEAU . Flex Toddler Leather Sneaker Jake White by PEDIPED, all from Shop Familia
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Melanie: Hailey pure blue top by Holland Voile Stripe Skirt both by LITTLE MARC JACOBS . Converse Chuck Taylor All Star in Pink by CONVERSE, all Shop Familia
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Ella: Lollipop multi dress by HULA STAR, Celestina Pink Shimmer by LIVIE & LUCA, all from Shop Familia
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Melanie: Crochet flower hat in pink and gray by COUTURE CLIPS . Longsleeved stretch denim dress by GIRLFRIENDS BY ANITA G . Pink Mary Janes by UMI, all from Shop Familia
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Mandy: Dress by GIRLFRIENDS BY ANITA G, stylist's own . Plaid tights in navy/green by JEFFERIES SOCKS, P442 . Silver shoes by NATURINO, all from Shop Familia
Daniel: Jurigy Gilet Vest by DIESEL KID . Striped polo by D MO BABY . Checkered wrist band by DIVIDED BY H&M . Jeans by CHIP & PEPPER . Brown leather shoes by UMI, all from Shop Familia www.bcmag.ph
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Natalia: Dress with Peplum Skirt by BABY FASHIONISTAS, P1,299, Pink sequined ballerina bag by TARTE TATIN, Brown leather shoes by NATURINO, Shop Familia
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Joseph: Powell longsleeved polo in lilac, P745, Ollie shorts in khaki, P695, both by PERIWINKLE JR., Rubber shoes in black/yellow/lime by FLORSHEIM KIDS, P1,199.75
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Mariana: Brynn Pinch Clip in Shocking Pink by NO SLIPPY HAIR CLIPPY . Long Sleeved Bodysuit with Eyelet Crotch Opening in Color Banana by AROMABABY . Crew socks in magenta/ cream/purple by BLIND MICE . Pink Mary Janes by FALCOTTO BY NATURINO, all from Shop Familia
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Mandy: Green corduroy cap with blue heart detail by CAPELLI NEW YORK, stylist's own . One side dress with layered skirt by BABY FASHIONISTAS, P1,199 . Black Mary Janes with bow by VINCENT, P1,496, Shop Familia
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Mariana: Sunday Stroll Velvet Jacket by EDEN’S BOUQUET . Micro Me Baby Tank Romper with Ruffles, Turquoise Dot by MICRO ME . Soft Soles Kids’ Organic Flower Child Crib Shoe by ROBEEZ, all from Shop Familia On background: Blue bag by Lassig, Rustan’s, Babyland
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bc events e
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SPECIAL
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celebrating motherhood
Events that celebrate the unique love of moms through products and services that nourish
Johnson and Johnson’s Event
During their recent press launch, Johnson & Johnson showed why Johnson’s Baby Milk Bath gives the best care for the skin and is the right choice for babies and mothers alike. The event, hosted by model and actress Angel Jacob, welcomed Johnson & Johnson’s newest brand ambassador, certified box-office and award-winning actress, Judy Ann Santos. A mother of two, Judy Ann said that Johnson & Johnson took care of her skin while growing up, and now she is passing on the family tradition by using Johnson’s Baby Milk Bath on her children. The night was serenaded by talented singer and harpist, Noelle Cassandra. Johnson & Johnson’s Marketing Manager, Rezel Aquino, talked about the joys and benefits of using Johnson’s Baby Milk Bath, as it gives the best possible care for both mother and child. With its clinically-proven, mild and “no more tears” formula, parents can be assured of the gentle yet nourishing care that Johnson’s Baby Milk Bath can provide their kids. 1 J&J Marketing Manager Rezel Aquino 2 J&J’s new brand ambassador, Judy Ann Santos 3 J&J Marketing Director, Tina Sabarre 4 Youthful-looking host, model and actress, Angel Jacob 5 Talented harpist and singer, Noelle Cassandra
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The Breastfeeding Club’s 2011 Annual Baby Shower
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The Breastfeeding Club with MedelaMoms Inc. once again celebrated Breastfeeding Month with their Annual Baby Shower on August 20. Mommies were pampered with freebies, games, and raffle prizes. Expectant moms posed for free pregnancy portraits courtesy of BC Magazine, received loot bags, and learned useful breastfeeding tips throughout the event. The guests enjoyed the healthy, scrumptious snacks from Mommy Treats, which gave away 10 one-week supplies of goodies to lucky mommies. Plus, a special diaper-cake was demoed and raffled off by Diaper Cakes by Jul. Prizes were also given away by Hatch and Latch, Quirks Marketing, Prolacta, Mamaway Maternity and Nursing Wear, and MommyMatters Nursing Wear. Winners of the games received goodies from Quirks Marketing (Dwell Studio), IndigoBaby, Z.E.N. Natural Skincare, ShooShoos/Nyumi, Nursing Mom, and Wonderwoman Agency. 1 Jul Izmir-Parojinog demonstrates how to put together a diaper cake 2 Cheng Duran and Chronicles of a Nursing Mom’s Jen Ong 3 Mamaway’s Jonie Cheng, MedelaMoms Inc.’s Maricel Cua, Hatch and Latch’s Helen See 4 Gwen Yason of Z.E.N Natural Skincare 5 Kris de Guzman, Cheng Duran, Maui Drilon, Ayne Rili, Abbie Yabot, and Paola Loot 6 Manoleth Semilla Unico with Abbie Yabot and Lactation Counsellor Isis Evasco 7 The Breastfeeding Club Founder Abbie Yabot with LoveLoop winner Mona Valle 8 All the pretty mommies in the Baby Shower 9 Prolacta Brand Manager Ayne Rili 10 Mamaway Philippines prize winners 11 MedelaMom Maricel Cua 12 Best Pregnancy Portrait winner Cristina GuzmanNatividad and her husband, with Jul Izmir Parojinog 13 Mommy Treats prize winners
www.bcmag.ph
bc directory FASHION (Children)
BABY FASHIONISTAS babyfashionistas.multiply.com; 714-3725; Eastwood Mall; SM North Edsa; Alabang Town Center . BARBIE richwell.net; SM Megamall 470-5933; Trinoma, 901-3221; SM Mall of Asia, 556-0687 . CIAO MARCO shopfamilia.com.ph; ciaomarco.com . CONVERSE converse.com.ph . COUTURE CLIPS coutureclipsboutique.com . DA LIL GUYS shopfamilia. com.ph . Diesel kid shopfamilia.com.ph . FORE!! AXEL AND HUDSON shopfamilia.com. ph; foreaxelandhudson.com . FLORSHEIM KIDS florsheimkids.multiply.com; Eastwood Mall; Greenbelt 5, 759-0055 . KAIYA EVE shopfamilia.com.ph . knuckleheads shopfamilia.com. ph . LäSSIG BAGS 395-5124; Rustan’s; Babyland; Chicco; Ollie&Co.; Baby&Beyond; Toy Town . naturino shopfamilia.com.ph . PERIWINKLE myperiwinkle.com; Robinson’s Galleria, 9226336/37; SM Megamall, ; Shangri-La Plaza; Glorietta Kids Zone . SHOP FAMILIA shopfamilia. com.ph; Ground Floor La’O Centre Building 1000 Arnaiz Ave. cor Makati Ave., San Lorenzo Village, Makati . STRIDE RITE Greenbelt 5, 728-3075; Rustan’s Makati; SM Megamall, 9147106; Trinoma Mall, 901-3079; Shangri-La Plaza, 477-5763 . TARTE TATIN Greenbelt 5, Rustan’s Department Store Makati, Rustan’s Department Store Shangri-La Plaza Mall . umi shoes shopfamilia.com.ph . Zutano Rustan’s stores; shopfamilia.com.ph BC’s cover mom, Daphne Oseña-Paez and family
Subscribe to BC Philippines
(Adults)
CHRIS DIAZ chrisdiazdesigns.multiply.com . COLE HAAN Powerplant Mall, Rockwell, 8980946; Rustan’s Makati, 813-3739; Glorietta 4, 815-2157; Shangri-La Plaza, 633-2847 . FOREVER 21 SM Megamall; SM Makati . HAVAIANAS All Flip Flops Bonifacio High Street; Glorietta 4; Greenbelt 5 . IM-HM im-hm.com . JOEL ESCOBER joelescober.multiply.com . LäSSIG BAGS 395-5124; Rustan’s; Babyland; Chicco; Ollie&Co.; Baby&Beyond; Toy Town . TINA DANIAC facebook.com/tina.daniac
HEALTH AND BEAUTY
the best choices for your family 5 issues for only P480.00 10 issues for only P960.00 Free delivery within Metro Manila
Please make all checks payable to BCMEDIA INC. or deposit to any BDO branch under BCMedia Inc. account number 4128000560 or Sterling Bank branch account no. 1636-000029-89. 0916.507.3227 | 0939.130.0997 | 889.6904 e-mail: info@bcmag.ph | www.bcmag.ph
BABYFLO Leading drugstores and department stores . BEAUTY BAR Robinson’s Galleria; Greenbelt 5 . BENCH Glorietta, Shangri-La Plaza Mall, Alabang Town Center, SM Megamall . BINACA Watson’s and SM Department Stores . CATHY VALENCIA cathyvalencia.com; 4663993, Unit B2 GF Westgate Tower Investment Drive Madrigal Business Park, Ayala Alabang; 751-3990, G5 Prince Plaza II Bldg. Dela Rosa St., cor Legaspi Village, Makati; 376-4202, 50F Timog Ave., South Triangle, Quezon City . CELETEQUE Watson’s, SM Supermarkets . CETAPHIL 470-8000, cetaphil.com; Leading drugstores and supermarkets . DOVE, DRYPERS, ENFANT Leading department stores . ESTEE LAUDER Rustan’s Department Store; Marionnaud . LAURA MERCIER Rustan’s Beauty Source; Marionnad . L’OREAL Rustan’s Beauty Source . MUSTELA Ayala Trinoma, Robinson’s Ermita, Pure Beauty, 2nd Level Serendra, Rustan’s Department Stores . NEUTROGENA Leading drugstores and supermarkets . NIVEA nivea.ph; 637-0469; Leading drugstores and supermarkets . OILATUM 892-0761; Leading drugstores and supermarkets . oilatum, pHYSIOGEL, POND’S, REXONA Leading drugstores and supermarkets . REVLON Rustan’s and SM Department Stores . SASMAR Healthy Innovation Distribution, Inc. 506-1912 . STERIPOD Watson’s and SM Department Stores . STRI-VECTIN SD Watson’s; Rustan’s; SM Department Stores . THE BODY SHOP thebodyshop.com.ph; Glorietta 3; Greenbelt 5; SM Megamall . THE FACE SHOP Glorietta 3; Greenbelt 5; SM Megamall . FIREFLY Toothbrushes Watson’s and SM Department Stores . ZERONA Quezon City, 4042384; Ortigas, 697-9024; Makati, 556-4878; Alabang, 697-2532
LIFESTYLE ACE HARDWARE acehardware.ph; SM North Edsa, 928-4926; SM Megamall; SM Makati . BLACKBERRY ph.blackberry.com . BRIGHT STARTS richwell.net, 732-5141, Leading department stores . CHICCO 732-5141; SM Megamall; SM North Edsa; SM Mall of Asia; Festival Supermall; Kids Zone Glorietta 3 . Chocolate fire Ground Level, PDCP Bank Centre Leviste St. cor. Rufino St., Salcedo Village, Makati . DRYPERS drypers.com.ph; Leading supermarkets and drugstores . FISHER-PRICE 371-9982; 732-5141; SM Department Store; Toys “R” Us; Rustan’s Department Store; Toy Kingdom; Kidz Station . GYMBOREE gymboreeph.com; Greenbelt 5; Powerplant Mall, Rockwell; Shangri-La Plaza; Serendra; Eastwood; Trinoma . MEDELA MOMS 0917-5614366; medelamoms.multiply.com . MOTHERCARE mothercare.com; Shangri-La Plaza, 638-4323; Greenbelt 5; Trinoma, 901-6353 . NUMA THE ORGANIC & ECO BABY STORE 7119636, 7321954, AEK Building, 40 E. Rodriguez Sr. Avenue, Quezon City . PAPERTRAIL papertrail.vpweb.com; 201 La’O Centre Building, 1000 Arnaiz St. San Lorenzo Village, Makati . PHILIPS AVENT 667-9000; Rustan’s and Baby Company stores . SAFETY 1ST SM Baby Co.; Leading department stores . TEMPUR Shangri-La Plaza Mall, Greenbelt, and Fort, Rustan’s Department Stores . Toys “R” Us Robinson’s Galleria, Robinson’s Place, Robinson’s Midtown, Alabang Town Center . THOMAS & FRIENDS Leading toy stores . WEIL BABY Shop Familia; Landmark; Rustan’s Department Store BC U.S.’s Cover Mom, Kourtney Kardashian with her son, Mason
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Curve that
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WEIL BABY IS ALSO Available AT Rustan’s AND THE LANDMARK
BC Classifieds
a
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bc moment look
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scott’s in-charge
efreshing. That is the first word that comes to mind after my time with Scott Baio. Since I was a child, Scott has been a very large part of my life. No, we didn’t have a family connection and no, he never coached my little league team. Scott’s contribution to my childhood came from the thing I know of that he does best—entertainment. From the late ‘80s to the early ‘90s, Charles was in charge of my days and nights, Charles was in control of my wrongs and rights. I wanted Charles in charge of me—and every week for a half hour, he was. Mind you, that’s not even considering the countless hours I spent with Chachi on Happy Days, and in my adult life, with Bob Loblaw of Arrested
Development. Like meeting all childhood heroes though, a moment of truth comes. A moment where the pedestal that you’ve propped them up on can all come crashing down in one word, one action, one afternoon in Encino, California. As soon as we entered his home, it was clear to me that I would be safe from that crash. Scott and his lovely, down-toearth wife, Renee, greeted us warmly and instantly showed us around. Needless to say, the house was beautiful—with a ‘60s vibe for its interiors, complete with a pool, koi pond, huge green backyard, gazebo (with a projector and flat screen TV and fridge), barbecue area, and tennis court. The only clutter that existed at the time was in a section of the living room that was filled with boxes and racks of clothing
Bailey: One-piece swimsuit by Hula Star by Gossip Girl . Pink sparkle jellie skimmer sandals by Designer’s Touch by Baby Deer Scott: Sazonar shirt by Diesel . Sway sayer short in heritage fit by Original Penguin . Shoes by D&G . Hat by H&M Renee: Tube mod dress by Diesel
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S c o tt B a i o and children’s products (with donations from celebrities like Dennis Quaid and Tim Allen) for a celebrity baby yard sale and auction to benefit the Bailey Baio Angel Foundation— an admirable disorder, to say the least. As we continued on, we met Renee’s eldest child, Kalyn. A beautiful and charming young woman, it is no surprise that she is her mother’s daughter, who shares the same good looks and aura of kindness. And finally, we met the star of the household, Bailey. “Cute” doesn’t begin to describe Scott and Renee’s little one, and not just because of those chubby thighs and cherubic looks. Her smiles and openness towards
new people are clearly results of mom, dad, and big sis showing her the love she deserves. A lot has changed for the Bugsy Malone star, who also recently has had three reality shows in the recent few years. Nowadays, the once ladies’ man is domesticated with 3 girls in his household, and spends his days playing rounds of golf. Between conversations on the couch, playing with Bailey, and watching him head up a family that genuinely cares for one another, I can safely say Scott Baio has not only kept my childhood perception and respect intact, he’s taken it to a new level.
BC: Scott has had a number of celebrity relationships. How were you able to change him to the marrying type? Renee: I don’t know if I changed him. I think
it’s all about timing. He thought it was probably time to become a father and a husband. I think we got married for a reason, and that was because we were madly in love with each other. If it had been 5 years earlier, we probably wouldn’t have gotten married because it wasn’t the time for that. BC: We remember how distraught you were when Bailey was tested positive for a potentially fatal disorder called GA-1, and how you were relieved when it was revealed that the result was false. What’s the greatest lesson you learned from that whole incident? R: We’re dealing with a lot of companies and a
lot of people wanting to volunteer their time for our fundraiser, and that question keeps popping up a lot. My grandmother, she had 12 children. She taught me two things that I always carry with me: The greatest love of all is the love of a child, it’s the best gift we adults can be given. And she also taught me that throughout your life, no matter what kind of trials and tribulations you may have to surpass or overcome, as long as you learn a lesson from it, then it’s a positive—and we definitely learned a lesson. We had never even heard of metabolic disorder had it not affected us. Having gone through that experience, I feel that we are better people, and the foundation is our way of giving back.
Scott: Long-sleeved shirt and trousers by Ben Sherman . Custom Nike Cortez in black with yellow bandana by Bandana Fever Renee: Birch dress and shoes by Ports 1961 . Flower cuff bracelet by Marguerite de Valois Bailey: Big dot print dress by Girlfriends by Anita G.
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I have a picture of Tom Jones on my computer from the album cover. She’ll start to scream and I’m like, ”Oh my God, she had her first crush on Tom Jones.” BC: How do you find your motherhood experience with Bailey so far, considering that you’ve already had some practice with your first daughter, Kalyn? R: It’s definitely easier the second time
around, because I’m not a teenager this time, and like I said, you learn from your mistakes. There were so many mistakes I made as a young, single, first-time mother [to Kalyn] that I would never make with Bailey. I know what to do when a child starts choking, and what to do when a child happens to have a tummy ache. It’s kind of like riding a bicycle, you don’t forget. I have to say, it’s a lot more fun this time around.
BC: Do you still have time for romantic dinners or little dates now that you have Bailey in your life? R: (Laughs) I missed out on every
milestone with Kalyn because I went to college and I worked two jobs, but I was fortunate enough with Kalyn to have a caregiver that wasn’t just a next door neighbor or a friend, she was a licensed caregiver. And she knew not to give away the biggest milestone, which is when my daughter took her first step. She led me to believe for about 3 or 4 years that I got to witness that, and then later she said, “Renee, she was already walking.” But she knew to keep mum about that, to let me at least enjoy that. This time around, I can tell you, my hand to God, this child [Bailey] has never been taken care of by anyone other than myself, my husband, or her sister. Maybe once on vacation, my parents watched her for an hour. I’m very fortunate to be a stay-athome mommy, and I’m not interested in having someone else raise my kid.
I’m afraid I’m gonna have to tag along with her to preschool or kindergarten, because I’m gonna miss her so much, haha! We do get to go out, although not often, and Kalyn watches her little sister. Someone just interviewed us about our “Hollywood lifestyle,” and I said we don’t really walk on any red carpet, but this weekend we’re supposed to for a children’s charity. I said that if Bailey hasn’t had a nap then she’s going to be cranky pants, so Kalyn will go with Scott, and I’ll just stay home. We always have Bailey in tow. BC: What kinds of clothes do you like dressing up Bailey in? R: I love and have a thing about casual
clothes, because I was a designer and had a clothing company once upon a time. I’m very big on how the clothing ‘feels.’ I don’t want her to be sitting, and the tulle on her skirt is itchy and she’s uncomfortable. I would rather have jersey cotton. I love Flowers by Zoe, Baby Butter clothes by Tracey Martin, and Juicy Couture—and pretty much everything that M. Fredric sells! The Harajuku line by Gwen Stefani is pretty much her favorite. If I put Bailey in a dress, it’s usually Sister Sam, or if I splurge, I buy Burberry.
BC: Renee is obviously very special to you. What was it about her that made you walk down the aisle? Scott: I don’t know, there’s a lot
of things, I guess. She didn’t try to change me, a lot of women try to change men. She’s a good and honest human being, very straightforward. There’s that chemical thing between a man and woman that sort of comes into play. That’s such a hard question to answer
Bailey: Big dot dress by Girlfriends by Anita G. Renee: Everglade dress by Maj Scott: Deck check wood shirt by Original Penguin . Black Thunderstorm hampstead fit slim cut trouser and sneakers, both by Ben Sherman Kalyn: Jumpsuit shorts in blueberry and tapioca by Ports 1961
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Scott: Sloory shirt by Diesel . Striped hat by H&M . Black Thunderstorm hampstead fit slim cut trouser by Ben Sherman Bailey: Original pettiskirt by Kaiya Eve . White mary janes by Umi . Butterfly necklace in 18K gold vermeil by Mija Jewelry . Flair pedestal high chair by Boon Renee: Butterfly necklace by Fuddy Duddy . Dress in caribou mix by Ports 1961 Kalyn: Dress by Storee
because there’s so many things about her. She’s just funny and all. Just the fact that I love her and she’s a good person—those are probably the big reasons. BC: We read that you were once terrified of fatherhood. How are you doing now? S: I imagine most guys are really terri-
fied of children. You don’t really know what’s involved in it. The big things I would think about before my baby was born were college, cars, and boys. I have about 12 years before that even comes into play, but that’s the kind of stuff that I was worried about. That was so insurmountable in my brain—and then when you have the baby, it’s just one day at a time, and every day is a new day. I thought I had to have every-
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thing done before she was 1—college, cars, insurance, but you know what, that stuff comes later on. What nobody prepares you for in the first year of a child’s life is that you, as a guy, you’re an outsider. I feel like I should be doing stuff, but I don’t know what to do! And then you realize, that’s just the way it is. Just learn to enjoy her, try to not to let it be overwhelming, which it can be, because it’s another life that I’m responsible for. BC: What daddy duties do you especially enjoy? S: I do many things, I enjoy changing
the diaper. I enjoy feeding her. I try to do everything, but I don’t do them as well as my wife. I can change a diaper pretty well. I don’t really care about
that, or the crappy diapers either. I thought I’d be gagging and puking all over the place, but it doesn’t faze me at all. I love playing with her. My thing with her is we’ll sit down and read. Plus, she’s a giant Tom Jones fan. We hang around my office, and I have a picture of Tom Jones on my computer from the album cover. She’ll start to scream and I’m like, “Oh my God, she had her first crush on Tom Jones.” BC: Is there someone’s parenting style you emulate? S: (Laughs) Umm, no. You know,
I defer to my wife because she’s done it before. It’s one of those things where it’s an on-the-job training, or you’re screwed. Nobody can tell you, or me anyway, what to do in terms of parent-
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Scott: Blanco classic fit shirt by Original Penguin . Clamdigger pant by Diesel Bailey: Velure swing jacket by Zutano, Jumpsuit by The Big Citizen, Green with white dots canvas sneaker by Designer’s Touch by Baby Deer
ing a child. She can bang her head, scrape her knees, walk into doors, what prepares you for that? BC: What are the funniest things that Bailey does? S: She grabs my nose quite hard a
lot. She loves my bellybutton. She loves to play hide and seek. What she makes me do is, she drags me into the master’s bedroom and I put her on a chair and I spin her in it, then I have to cover the whole thing with a blanket so she’s totally hidden. Then I have to find her hand. Once I find her hand, she screams. Then she wants me to put the blanket back up and do it again. BC: What kind of father are you going to be to a teen-age Bailey? S: I’m so afraid of it. I’m totally afraid
of that. I was talking to somebody about it. It’s one piece of advice that I think I’m gonna take. He said, “When
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a boy comes over to take your daughter out, you have to make the boy believe that you’re a little crazy.” It’s funny but it’s the absolute truth. I might even sit there with a gun or something, I kinda have the speech in my head already, what I’m gonna say to him. BC: How is your relationship with your stepdaughter, Kalyn, and do you have any advice for parents who may find themselves in the same position? S: That’s a very tough one, because
she is a teenager and she’s not my kid, but she lives in my house and it’s my rules—so I don’t know how to discipline her because she’s not mine—not that she needs a lot of discipline since she’s a good girl. It’s just a weird thing. I have good conversations with her, but I can’t demand that she do something—and unless she does something completely out of line, then I blow my top. Other than that, she’s pretty de-
cent and good, so it’s been okay. My advice to any guy with a stepdaughter? When you’re starting to feel uncomfortable in discipline, stop talking. BC: Would you want Bailey to be part of the industry you’re in? What’s one lesson that you will teach her about it? S: First part of the question, I hope
she doesn’t. It’s a tough business, and I think the only advice that I would give her is, and this sounds so general, but I would give her the advice that I give to people in the industry—it’s that every person that you meet is full of shit, including me. I think if you go through the business thinking that, you’ll be a lot better off, and you won’t succumb to manipulation, lies, and all that kind of stuff. Just keep your head upright. It’s a hard thing to do, but I will be there, like my parents were there for me, if she decides to get into it. bc
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Bailey: Shirt by Zutano, Reversible skirt by Right Bank Babies, Urchin mary jane shoes in rose mini leopard by Umi Scott: Striped shirt and pants by Diesel . Compton sunglasses by Entourage of 7 www.bcmag.ph
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P H OTO G R A P H S B Y M a r t i n & K a r i z Ta n ya Fav i s S t y li n g b y K a r i z F a v i s Text by Neil Garguilo Hai r a n d M ak e - up b y M e r e d i t h S c o tt S t y li n g A ssis t a n t J u l i a B e n n e tt
Bailey: Brown bodysuit by L’ovedbaby . Polkadot trench coat by Juicy Couture Scott: Cardigan by Cloth Logic . Orange shirt by Original Penguin . Pants by Ben Sherman Renee: Lariat necklace and cocktail ring by Marguerite de Valois . Printed multi-dress in ivory and fuchsia by Sue Wong Kalyn: Tank top by Song . Skirt by Zula Studio . Embrace hoop necklace in bronze by Prismera Design
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