The Quest - Issue 10 TRANSFORMATION

The Quest is a BeCollaboration digital publication

Issue Ten 2019

VANESSA-LOUISE MOORE Spotlight on a key collaborator

BAIJU SOLANKI

The theme of this issue is:

TRANSFORMATION

CAROL MAY ERKAN ALI GLEN WILLIAMSON JACKIE PERKINS SANJAY SHAH

Published by BeCollaboration, 21 Victoria Road, Surbiton, Surrey, KT6 4JZ UK Issue 10, first published on 1st May 2019 All rights reserved.

Copyright © BeCollaboration and Contributors, 2019 While aligned to the vision and values of BeCollaboration, the views expressed here are soley those of the contributors and are not expressions of policy on behalf of the BeCollaboration leadership.

To experience a BeCollaboration Community, be our guest and come to a meeting.

Register at www.becollaboration.com/meetings/

For more details about The Quest and about BeCollaboration, visit our website at www.becollaboration.com.

You can contact the team by writing to thequest@becollboaration.com, or to one of the contributors whose contact emails can be found at the end of their articles.

The Quest is a publication platform open to members of BeCollaboration to contribute to major debates and issues of concern. Operating within the UK economy, and part of a global economic system, contributors to The Quest hold a big picture. They are personally involved with complex issues that require the skills and intent of many to solve. They are on a passionate, sometimes a life-long search, to secure change in the world and as such hold a great responsibility for benefitting future generations.

BeCollaboration believes in working for a world where every individual has the opportunity to be the best they can be: where we are empowered to recognize and honour our ‘innate genius’, exploit our full potential and make our dreams real. We seek a world where business and work are designed to meet a Human need for respect, to be valued, to achieve and to contribute to others. Most of all we seek a world where everyone has the opportunity to have their voice. heard and make a positive difference to the planet and humanity. www.BeCollaboration.com

2

Join the discussion...

3

About our contributors Sanjay Shah Over the last 20 years, Sanjay has built a thriving career, working with professional entrepreneurs, business owners and public organisations across the UK. A series of life challenges culminating in a heart attack by the age of 42 contributed to some hard and fast lessons for Sanjay in how to live a more fulfilled life without sacrificing career, relationships and health. This has led to a successful business, showing thousands business professionals how to build successful businesses and leave a lasting legacy without paying a price for their success.

As a transformational speaker, Sanjay is highly rated by his peers and has spoken for many organisations within the UK, and also in Spain, India and the USA.

Glen Williamson As a Consultant Sales Director, Speaker, Co-Author of Sales Genius #1 and Accredited Master Coach (CSA), Glen Williamson leads and inspires hundreds of sales professionals and new business owners to reach new height of sales performance.

Taking his 32 years of experience in sales and business development, Glen develops methodologies that help SME’s and sales people to exceed their targets while transforming who they are being so that they can live happier, full and more fulfilled lives.

Glen believes that sales is a collaborative process, part of who we are and how we survive, and at its core, must be a desire to ‘help’, not ‘sell’.

Carol May Menopause Maven, Transformational Midlife Health Specialist, Coach, Speaker & BeCollaboration Accomplice. I work with women experiencing weight, health, work and relationship challenges as a result of the Menopause.

I empower women to Power Through the Menopause with Ease, kick the mood swings, hot flushes & weight gain into touch, and embrace their changing body and lives with zestiness, sexiness and joy! I not only teach women how to support their body as it changes, but I also some essential skills to improve their relationships, to feel calmer, more energised and focused all the time, and help them develop emotional resilience.

www.BeCollaboration.com

4

Erkan Ali Creator and Co Founder of BeCollaboration & Ringmaster at Engage Talent

Bringing multi talented teams together to create breakthrough performance is exactly what Erkan loves about his work. With over 20 years experience Erkan empowers business owners and their teams to meet and surpass their limits and achieve more than they ever thought possible.

Baiju Solanki As an award winning entrepreneur, psychologist, speaker, coach, trainer and Founder of EnSpirit Baiju has worked across a number of sectors including academia, corporate and sales. Baiju is the founder and inspiration behind the successful Wanna Be An Entrepreneur events that have touched the lives of hundreds of young entrepreneurs in the south east of England. He is a social media evangelist, and coaches a growing network of engaged and highly motivated people.

Jackie Perkins Jackie is a people, possibilities and performance person! At House of Colour, a UK based franchise organisation excelling in the world of image – taking control of your visibility and personal brand through the power of colour and style.

Having started out in IT, ‘helping people make the most of their (IT) boxes’ she now specialises in ‘helping people make the most of their (own) boxes’ (skills, values, passion and purpose, plus themselves) by integrating over 20 years of exploring transformation and personal development with some of the world leaders.

She makes connections enabling us to explore new opportunites and possibilities, often enabling breakthrough results. Jackie is currently exploring opportunities for leveraging the accessibility of HOC technology through collaboration, unless of course her she’s providing meals and taxi services to her children!

Vanessa Louise Moore Vanessa’s mission is to enable others to recognise their own magnificence, move through their fears, express their essential selves with confidence and purpose. Just as nature intended the cocoon to become the butterfly, you too are destined to live a magical and harmonious life – The life of your choice!

Join the discussion...

5

Editorial Gill Tiney

When we decided to look at the subject of transformation, it was with a background understanding that BeCollaboration as a community are constantly looking for opportunities to evolve and transform.

Sanjay Shah, in his article has keenly observed how we become easily indoctrinated into a belief system, he cites our current education system as the beginning of a systemic intention to cultivate a pervading sense of fear and uncertainty. Once this has been revealed it is much easier to step away from this ongoing, through process and look to personal transformation. This in turn, frees us from our depression and we can see a way to release ourselves of the emotional turmoil we have been facing. Glen Williamson acknowledges the responsibility we all have to look to develop our inner selves. His story of wasted years in stilted relationships illustrates the urgency we all need to be aware of, to complete unresolved conflicts. The resulting transformation creates a new Being and a new possibility for the relationship and for the individual.

Of course, we are all familiar with purely physical transformations. The amazing stories of people who change their physical bodies, through diet, or exercise to have the ‘longed for’ svelte body are common place in our media. Carol May illustrates that a true physical transformation will only be maintained when the inner Being has transformed too. She identifies a simple 8 Step process to transformation, a great place to start if you feel your time is now!

Erkan Ali shares his personal story on transformation and how before his metamorphosis he had been stuck for 22 years in a downward spiral, living in a space of fear and prejudice of his own making. He tells of the moment he was transformed and the empowerment that gave him, seeing for the first time, the narrow world he had created for himself. Baiju Solanki went half way round the world in search of transformation, and found that it was up to him to choose it for himself. No special yoga retreat is required, although very nice to have, you can simply view your circumstances in a new way and choose possibility. His recollection of his disappointment and eventual enlightenment will resonate with many.

Finally, Jackie Perkins looks at the after effects of transformation. Her work with her company House of Colour gives her the privilege of seeing people energised when they are made aware of how to enhance their true selves. She discovers the new-found energy that a transformation will impart. Recalling the work of David R. Hawkins, she shares how powerful a transformation will be when you work to achieve that metamorphosis from caterpillar to butterfly.

There is no going back! www.BeCollaboration.com

6

Sometimes we get stuck in our views and emotions – our story becomes so ingrained in us that we even believe our own exaggerations. We don’t have to live with our views, we don’t have to nurse the pain until it becomes a festering poison within our bodies. We can release the emotion that is holding us back and consign it to the past and be free again for the future, YOUR future, the future you can CHOOSE Every contributor to this issue of The Quest has had their own personal journey and incredible transformations and they have kindly shared some of them here. I am sure one or more will resonate with you. Please connect with them and learn more about their journey and how they might be able to help you too.

As always if you would like to meet them in person you can find them at a BeCollaboration meeting Here where you can talk, discuss, debate all things TRANSFORMATION!

About The Quest Team The Quest is produced by the BeCollaboration Digital Team and is made possible by, you.

For her proofreading skills, many thanks to Linda Burns. lifeinsideout8@gmail.com

For marketing and communications, our huge thanks go to Scott Campbell of Affecting Peoples Lives scott@affectingpeopleslives.com

For creating and the maintenance of the website and the proofreading, a huge thanks to Kay Westrap. kay@couragetogrow.me.uk

For concept design, layout and art, our warmest gratitude to Angela Makepeace of Angela Makepeace Motion Graphics Studio info@angelamakepeace.co.uk For being a great technical lead, our huge respect to Simon Thomas of Toucan Internet LLP. simon@toucanweb.co.uk

Our warmest gratitute to Anne Gould, for her proofreading skills. isworkingwordzmedia@gmail.com For her driving force to bring the project to fruition, proofing and liaising with contributors, writing of editorial and case study and being our Team Dynamo we give huge thanks to Gill Tiney gill@becollaboration.com

Join the discussion...

7

Lead article

Sanjay Shah

FROM TRANCEFORMATION TO TRANSFORMATION TranceFormation – the Global Programming of the Unconscious Mind www.BeCollaboration.com

8

In my work as a speaker, trainer and coach in the field of Emotional Intelligence and Transformation, I have become increasingly alarmed at the inability of people in society, today, to deal with basic human emotions like Fear, Anxiety, Anger and Disappointment (there are of course others, but I have selected these as some of the common ones.

become Sad, Disappointed and Depressed at the ongoing situation. This can then lead to more Anger!

This Fear and Anxiety then lead to Anger, as the situations seem to increase in number and frequency. The result is extremism (initially in thoughts and beliefs) amongst the population at its inability to make a significant difference to the perceived threats, and the need to blame something or someone for the ‘mess’ we find ourselves in. And the threats aren’t limited to the original causes, they are perceived to come from many scenarios, including the exodus of people created by war and conflict in far off countries. This anger has the outlet in more extreme behaviour.

What has gone wrong with the rest of society?

As people become more desperate to find a solution that is not appearing, and seems to be thwarted by the politicians (the very people elected to find a solution), they eventually

1 - the act or process of imparting or acquiring general knowledge, developing the powers of reasoning and judgement, and generally of preparing oneself or others intellectually

Of more concern is the impact of 24-hour news reporting; the formation of a global trance (or program), one where the masses are becoming more worried, scared and angry at the seemingly endless threats being beamed Let me explain why these are common. into their homes. The brain doesn’t interpret these reports as a few reports being repeated We live in a world where Fear and Anxiety are at during a period of time; it interprets them as a a heightened level. The risk of terrorist attacks new threat each time they are shown. in both eastern and western society has never been higher, with a new generation of terrorist Why is it that we, as a society, are less able that can strike just about anywhere, anytime, to deal with these basic human feelings/ with little forewarning. The media reports in emotions when they are, in reality, simple to real time from war zones and disaster areas, deal with? Even in the business world, I find that and the reported news during the day is on most people do not have the simple ability to a loop with the same images beamed across deal with their feelings – this is a key difference the world repeating to the sound of different between people I meet at BeCollaboration – reporters. This constant barrage of images people are far more able to know how to deal breeds fear and anxiety amongst the watching with their feelings or are willing to learn how to populations. do it.

The Root of the Problem I believe that that the Education system has much to do with our inability to deal with our emotions.

Before we can look at what education leads to, a dictionary definition of the word Education is a good place to start.

Education:

Join the discussion...

9

“...the ability to understand and control your own feelings, and to understand the feelings of others and react to them in a suitable way.” for mature life.

2 -The act or process or acquiring particular knowledge or skills, as for a profession, Knowledge, reasoning, judgement and intellect all refer to the thinking mind, and this is how education is geared up. To teach, train and test the mind’s abilities!

There is no mention in the definition of Emotions (Feelings) or Emotional Intelligence (EI). This is increasingly regarded as an important skill for people at all levels within companies, but there is no mention of it in the dictionary definition of the word Education!

This is not surprising. For decades, education’s role has been to prepare the future workforce to be a good and obedient source of labour in the industrial age. Despite its mention in the definition, the role of education was not to create people of high intellect, let alone people who knew how to process emotions which they didn’t like. This all changed with the arrival computers and the information age – to get by in this era, people had to learn to think and the education system adapted SLIGHTLY to enable this, but not so much as to enable people to think for themselves!

Emotions and emotional intelligence were not even considered.

In a rapidly changing world this can no longer be sustained. With more time on their hands as computers and, now, artificial intelligence (AI), increasingly take over the mundane labourintensive tasks of the workforce, the inability

of people to deal with emotions generated by differences in all sorts of areas, is a growing problem. Computers and AI are replacing people in industrial AND office-based tasks.

Jobs and careers are changing and, in some cases, disappearing. Uncertainty, Fear and Insecurity are prevalent, and Anger is increasing.

Here is the definition of EI according to the Cambridge Business English Dictionary (emphasis is placed by me): the ability to understand and control your own feelings, and to understand the feelings of others and react to them in a suitable way.

In my trainings I describe the difference between Thinking and Feeling: Thinking is linear, logical and sequential. E.g. A B C D…X Y Z or 1 2 3…7 8 9.

Feelings are non-linear, non-logical and nonsequential! E.g. X U D … P S B or 9 5 6… 2 8 3 In practical terms it is like trying to speak, say, the Arabic language through English. It just doesn’t happen. The international language of aviation (and pilots) is English (because it is regarded as logical) and you need logic to fly a plane!

Trying to understand Emotions through the process of Thinking is not possible. Thoughts and Thinking can be understood through the Mind, but Emotions and Feeling must be experienced in the Body – it is not enough to think about and understand them – they just don’t follow the logic of the Mind.

www.BeCollaboration.com

10

Thoughts can be understood! Emotions must destructive behaviours. be felt – which challenges the dictionary definition.

Understanding how to change feelings, is not the same as changing how we feel. It Transformation - Breaking the Trance is important to remember that emotional intelligence is developed through experience.

Going back to the dictionary definition, people Theory can be learned but emotions must be often know how they are feeling. They may not experienced. You can’t effectively develop have a name for the feeling, but they know if it emotional intelligence from a book –beyond makes them feel good or bad. What the cause the basic theory, it’s all experience. is, of that feeling. And more importantly, what do you do about how you feel.

How do you develop Emotional Intelligence?

There are some common ways in which we have learned to avoid and deny the way we feel, (e.g. drink, drugs, food, sex, and shopping being the common ones!), but we don’t know how to change the feelings. Avoiding feelings now only means feeling them later down the line – until we learn to deal with them.

This is one of the ironies of EI – that at its core it is most quickly developed by using the mind to do what it can do really well: make decisions. EI begins with your willingness to make decisions.

There is an analogy I use:

Emotional Intelligence can teach us how to Imagine sitting on a fence with a leg either change the way we feel without resorting to side of the fence. It’s uncomfortable at first Join the discussion...

11

“I believe the time for learning Emotional Intelligence is now. With the World as it is, life would become, firstly, a lot more bearable, then enjoyable and fulfilling for billions of people. ”

and, eventually, even painful.

step, but learning to answer these 3 questions and acting on those answers has led to Sitting on a fence hurts more than getting off hundreds of thousands of people begin their that fence, whichever side you decide to get journey of higher Emotional Intelligence and a off on. more fulfilling and happier job/career, health and life.

Our unwillingness to make decisions is a source of greater pain and discomfort than the The path to Transformation is simple to begin; actual decision itself. so simple that people believe it can’t be that There are 3 questions you need to answer to begin developing EI. Think of an emotion you are feeling/ experiencing, that is causing you discomfort.

Ask yourself and answer these 3 questions: 1- Could you let go of that feeling? (i.e. does the possibility exist that you can do it, even the tiniest possibility?)

2- Would you let that feeling go? (i.e. are you actually willing to?)

3- When? (i.e. now or later)

simple because they have suffered from debilitating emotions for so long. If you are one of these people, I ask you to ask yourself 1 -Could I let it be easy?

2 -Would I let it be easy?

3-When?

I believe the time for learning Emotional Intelligence is now. With the World as it is, life would become, firstly, a lot more bearable, then enjoyable and fulfilling for billions of people. Can we allow ourselves to be in the vanguard? I know I can - and so can you.

It’s your decision.

Simplistic as it seems, these decisions to 3 simple questions really are the beginning of You can contact Sanjay at: removing the debilitating feelings of Fear, Anxiety, Anger and Disappointment, and Sanjay@SanjayShah.tv replacing them with far more empowering www.sanjayshah.tv feelings of Courage, Willingness, Acceptance, Love and Joy. It is beyond the scope of this short article to teach you more than this first www.BeCollaboration.com

12

Join the discussion...

13

www.BeCollaboration.com

14

Fed up with politics – big P and little p?

Upset with our media, seeing propaganda filled programmes giving biased opinion, social media feeding our misconceptions?

Let down by the education system?

Sickened by the poverty on our own doorstep?

Is this the status quo? Can one person change anything?

It feels impossible that anyone can even make a dent in our real world problems.

And yet…

There is a way for YOU to make a difference.

Discover what Gill Tiney believes is the very beginning of a whole world solution.

No revolution No bloodshed Yet a way to stop the madness Making of a Movement is her story to awakening, the dawning of a realisation that she isn’t looking for a hero to save the world – she is hero enough to make a start. She doesn’t need all of the solutions to the vast dichotomy we find ourselves in, we don’t need to have all of the answers to build a new future. What we need is Collaboration the tool to transform the negative spiral we are currently living in and together build a better future.

This book tells her journey, the lessons learned, the path still to come, the firm belief that this is her reason for being. If you are passionate about what you do and who you are, you will recognise her frustrations as she comes across opposition, and triumphs as new people appear to support the cause. This is a story not merely of success, of making millions, but of hope and certainty that we can all be better, and can all make an impact while we are privileged enough to be here our planet earth.

Join the discussion...

15

Glen Williamson

THE DOORWAY TO TRANSFORMATION

www.BeCollaboration.com

16

constantly open up new possibilities for myself and my life.

Seven Years of Silence Between January 2010 and February 2017, I didn’t speak with my father. I wasn’t consciously angry with him, I just felt I didn’t need him in my life and so I didn’t make an effort. I believed he had acted irresponsibly in front of my family and did not apologise for his actions. My father was old fashioned, principled and stubborn and he thought it unacceptable that I didn’t contact or respond to him, so stopped contacting me.

Seven years of no communication followed.

Then, in February 2017 I found myself on the phone to him in an emotional, honest conversation, telling him I honoured him for everything that I see that is good in me and for everything I see that is not good in me, I take complete responsibility.

I had an experience that transformed me, it created a new way of being for me that had me see my father as a giant, despite his actions and words, despite the past. More than that, I started to see everyone (yes, everyone) as extraordinary human beings. This is very different to the man I was before. Before, I had it that the world was made up of people who were invariably right and wrong, good and bad and shame on the wrong and the bad. Standing in this world view, my father fell into the wrong and bad category. But my view has suddenly and radically transformed, at the ripe young age of 50 years old, the penny finally dropped, and a more loving, vulnerable and authentic person emerged.

What I have found interesting since then, is not so much the transformation, but what gave me access to transformation. In knowing this, I can

A Life Well Lived?

In January 2017, I flew to Seattle on a Saturday afternoon to train half a team of sales people for three days. I had trained the other half of the sales team in Dubai the month before. I also had clients in Germany and across the UK, so most of 2016 was spent on trains, planes and automobiles, and when I wasn’t travelling, I was sitting behind my computer developing my training courses. As a result of my sedentary, but busy lifestyle, on the Monday morning, soon after I started training, I suffered a heart attack. I had developed a deep vein thrombosis during the ten-and-a-half-hour flight across the Atlantic. As I lay in the hospital bed in the days that followed, I had a lot of time to reflect and the one question that kept coming up was, had I died on Monday morning, would that have been a life well lived? Whichever way I looked at it, I couldn’t conclude that I had lived a life of which I could be proud.

I had never been able to let go of the judgment, control, manipulation, as well as the disappointment and worry. I had played small, pretending to be confident, but really hiding. I had spent too much time trying to look good and impress people. I hadn’t always spoken the truth and there were many people who I hadn’t treated well. I had made excuse after excuse, blaming my father and my childhood for everything that didn’t work in my life. I did well because of my charisma, sense of humour, but I wasn’t really happy.

Join the discussion...

17

“...without my ego getting in the way, and in the absence of ego I was able to ask myself powerful questions and answer honestly. ”

So, in the hospital, thousands of miles from home, alone and vulnerable, I undertook a level of exploration that I had never undertaken before. One without my ego getting in the way, and in the absence of ego I was able to ask myself powerful questions and answer honestly. There was nothing to protect me and through this exploration I became aware that I wanted something different for myself and my life.

growth opportunity in my comfort zone, there was also minimal threat to the false sense of self I had created as a coping mechanism.

A New Way of Being and Seeing

I recalled during the course putting my hand up in class as a nine-year-old to answer my teachers’ question, and the whole class (including my teacher) erupted with laughter at the stupidity of my response. At that moment, I made a decision that if I put my hand up, or raised my head above the parapet, I would be laughed at and made to feel inadequate.

For over a decade, I stopped putting my hand up. When called upon in group situations, which is frequent as a sales person, I became skilled at using humour to deflect the focus away from me or claim that I didn’t know the answer, even if I did. It de-risked the situation, I got away without feeling humiliated, I could cope with that. Instead of people laughing at me, I created a way of being that had everyone laugh with me. Yes, it lacked authenticity, and meant that I wasn’t a voice, but it protected me, I was safe.

During the course, I came to understand how throughout my life, I had created ways of being that helped me to cope with the world, based on my past experiences, traumas and collapses. As an adult, I entered different situations by adopting a dominant way of being that was comfortable and protected me from potential threat, so that I wouldn’t experience what I experienced in the past. I saw the incredible dimensions of my comfort zone and how I used it to avoid responsibility and be a victim. And I saw that while there was no

Nowadays, as I coach and train sales professionals of all ages and levels across the world who are battling with similar limiting beliefs, which stop them from achieving peak performance, I can help them to get out of their own way. What this looks like is having a) people bring into awareness that there is something in their way, and they have created a comfort zone to cope, b) realisation that something has to change, c) explore the impact of this way of being on their lives, d) take responsibility for their words, actions and lives and d) relate to

Soon after I returned home, I attended a course in London. For two years, a friend had been telling me that I should attend this course, as it provides individuals with the ability to create breakthroughs in their life and live a life they love. Every time he mentioned it, I railed against the idea, convinced that my life was great, and I had everything nailed. But he never gave up, he stood for my transformation and in his language, I finally heard his commitment to me.

www.BeCollaboration.com

18

the world from a place and listening of pure me. The opportunity to attend a life-changing possibility. course and the stand my friend took for me to attend, the gift book that turned up out of Taking responsibility for my life meant I had to the blue from an overseas friend, a chance let go of so many of my inauthenticities and I opportunity to speak at an event to speak on saw with great clarity that living a life powerfully the subject of leadership, all looked different is to live a life of service. For the first time I got to me once I had worked my way through to that the world was not all about me, but about awareness via responsibility, exploration and contribution, and it was only my false self that realisation. But I had been on tens of courses I created as a coping mechanism, that needed in my time, read hundreds of books, spoke at my life to be about me. I saw that nothing many events. What would be different now? happened outside of me, that I was a creator, and I can create anything I wanted for myself As my awareness of myself increased, my and my life; that the only thing that stopped limiting beliefs slowly dropped away. The me was the self I had created to protect me. more aware I became of who I was and why I saw so many things with clarity, I was able to I thought and acted the way I did, the less I call numerous people and tell them the truth was a victim. As I became more aware of the for the first time in my life, and one of those protective shield I built around myself, and calls was to my father. It is good that I made the thoughts and emotions that came with it, that call, as my father passed away recently, the more I was able to take responsibility. The and I had two great years of really getting to more I took responsibility, the easier it was to know him. let go.

But where was the realisation, and the awareness in me before my trauma? I was convinced I was smart and capable, worldly and free. Why couldn’t I see that my life didn’t really work. How is it that my awareness only became heightened following a traumatic event?

I started asking people about their transformations. The common threads were, there was often a friend who acted as the catalyst, someone who stood for the individual to experience something at a critical point in their lives and/or a significant traumatic event that acted as the catalyst and research bears this out.

Letting Go This world is extremely clever. It constantly creates opportunities for us to transform by placing before us the very situations (moments, insights, people, books, challenges etc.) we seek to avoid. It invites us to step out of our comfort zone and enter the many doorways that open in front of us.

Once I was aware, it didn’t take a lot of looking to see how many doorways were opening for

In the 1980’s two psychologists, Lawrence Calhoun and Richard Tedeschi discovered that most trauma survivors reported their lives had changed for the better and coined the term Post-Traumatic Growth. Across a sample of over 600 people, survivors said their lives had more meaning, they had greater courage and conviction and they were closer to friends and family.

Join the discussion...

19

www.BeCollaboration.com

20

But I would rather not wait for another traumatic experience before I experience my next transformation. We shouldn’t need trauma to transform, should we? So, without trauma, in what atmosphere or environment do we need to place ourselves in order to have a doorway opened? And it was in this enquiry that I found the missing piece of the puzzle.

I wasn’t even aware of the potential for Generative listening, that we can listen from a place of pure possibility, without judgment.

According to Otto Scharmer, this type of listener opens the space for something new to be born, it is creative, powerful and collaborative. It is a type of listening where we are so present that we pick up on things intuitively that we would not normally pick up and you hear underlying commitment or desire. This is where the magic happens, there is a freedom in this type of listening as you and the one you communicate with become one and generate each other. It is where breakthroughs occur, and where the doorway to transformation is presented to us, time and time again.

As an ego-driven, always busy person, focused on avoiding pain through my false-self creations, I mostly listened for facts that would enhance and increase my understanding of a subject, and if I didn’t hear anything that achieved that, I disqualified it. At other times I would listen empathically, get into the other persons world and create an emotional connection and as a sales person, I had trained My access to transformation is to listen from a myself to do this professionally, but wasn’t very place of possibility, to engage in authentic, egogood at it personally. free reflection, followed by deep exploration so that my awareness is raised. And as I go So, when advised to go on a course that would through this process, I shed the layers of false, be life changing, I didn’t hear my friend’s inauthentic self, take responsibility for myself commitment to me, because I wasn’t listening and my life, and have the courage to step over properly. When reading a book which had the the threshold where transformation awaits. power to help me grow, I didn’t hear what I was reading because I read it through a lack You can contact Glen at: of listening. I read for facts. When meeting someone, I didn’t see them as extraordinary glen@gwcsalestraining.com because my listening for them was judgmental.

Join the discussion...

21

www.BeCollaboration.com

22

What are the BeCollaboration meetings all about?

We are a community of motivated and passionate people who choose to work closely together so we can make a positive impact on businesses, organisations and the lives of individuals we work with.

People get involved with BeCollaboration for the buzz of being part of something larger than themselves. They want to be able to fulfil their dreams and ambitions with a team of collaborators who are as passionate as they are, and share the same goals.

Collaboration creates empowerment for personal, professional and philanthropic growth. In short, we are up for changing the world. Fancy a bit of that?

You can see a little more about the whole BeCollaboration approach to life and business here: www.becollaboration.com/our-vision

Details of all our meetings are on our website: www.BeCollaboration.com

Join the discussion...

23

Carol May

WHAT IS PERSONAL TRANSFORMATION?

www.BeCollaboration.com

24

Transformation is a noun meaning “a thorough or dramatic change in form or dramatic change in form or appearance or character”.

What is a personal transformation? It’s the process of changing who you are and becoming the person you want to be or who you really are inside.

And January is the most popular month of the year to set goals and focus on change…January is the month when social media, newspapers and magazines are awash with articles on how to transform your body…. And so, yet again, we resolve to lose weight and go to the gym! We resolve that this year will be different…. Yet if we don’t transform inside first, nothing is going to change on the outside.

Comparison photos are everywhere, shaming us into believing we are not worthy unless we can transform from one body to another….

We all have those voices in our head: sometimes they shout; sometimes they whisper. Sometimes they make unreasonable demands; sometimes they offer sage advice.

One frequent voice says, “You need to change.

You need to do better. You need to lose

weight. You need to get fit.” Sometimes that call-to-change inspires and motivates us, but so often is makes us feel uncomfortable, guilty, shameful and just plain bad when once again we seem to ‘fail’ at what we had set out to change.

A caterpillar doesn’t morph into a butterfly by random chance, nor does a personal transformation occur randomly or without support. Instead, both scenarios happen through a series of meticulous and orderly steps over a period of time, and require a lot of energy and focus.

When I was looking to make changes in my own life, I had no idea initially that it would involve such a huge personal transformation.

I tried various strategies that only led to more stress and worrying and absolutely no relief of my deep unhappiness. Not seeing any progress, I started to let self-doubt and lack of belief creep into my mind….the death knell for transformative change.

Although it seems daunting to think about becoming someone that you’re currently not, or learning a skill that seems impossible in this moment, transformations are essential for

Join the discussion...

25

“ Long-term success with personal transformation comes down to consistency with daily habits, repetition, time and patience.”

continual success and growth.

Sometimes the path of life comes to a crossroads. One direction ends in stagnation while the other leads to transformation.

When I became single again in my 50’s, I realized I had no idea WHO I was… Oh I knew all the identifying labels: mother, daughter, sister, friend, teacher, counsellor etc.…but postdivorce and menopause I had absolutely no idea who I was….in fact I had never known who I was. I sunk into a deep depression, feeling completely groundless without my previous structure and direction.

Get guidance and support. To reach my ultimate goal I needed directions to avoid getting lost. And setbacks like that can be demotivating. I needed a guide and mentor who had walked the same path, someone whose support I could rely on, someone with whom I could be open and cry if I needed to (and I did, a lot!) Personal transformation is also nurtured by social support. We need each other if we are going to change in a profound way, that fulfills the aspirations of the Self.

Certainly, there can be value in spending time alone or personal retreat. But transformational work also depends on making deep, authentic connections — within ourselves and with others.

Slowly, I began to realize I was at my own personal crossroads with a decision to make; Let go of my old identity including allowing to choose change, or to stay safely in the past myself to grieve over the loss of that identity. with absolutely no sense of Self.

To Forgive both myself and others for the Past.

It took some time, but I eventually decided the My life’s path had led me to this opportunity for risk of stagnation was too painful for me; I had personal transformation, but I could not even to begin my own transformation. And these are get onto the first rung of the Transformation ladder without letting go and forgiving. the Transformational steps I followed: Find your why. The first step in the journey to transforming ourselves is to decide why. Our why ignites our spirits. It gives us the motivation necessary to chase our goals, to go in search of a new version of ourselves.

Trust the process. Overnight success stories are anything but. They only seem to be overnight success stories because we didn’t hear about the years of struggle, or how they were working at their goals long before anyone knew. Personal transformation happens

www.BeCollaboration.com

26

through a process that cannot be rushed. At the beginning, there is a lot of uncertainty and resistance to change. In the middle, it’s messy and things might not be moving in our desired direction or at speed! But only at the end does the journey become clear.

Choose yourself. At the end of the day, if you don’t believe in yourself, how do you expect others to believe in you? You need to be your biggest fan. Because if you don’t value yourself to the highest degree, who will?

You can contact Carol at: Long-term success with personal transformation comes down to consistency carolmay54@live.co.uk with daily habits, repetition, time and patience.

Focus on being in the moment instead of the past or the future – not easy after a lifetime of never BEing in the moment.

Look within and allow the Real You to be reborn – at least that is how this Transformational Process felt to me, rebirth. I didn’t have to search for me or create a me I was happy with – the real me was still inside, waiting to be allowed out to play.

“Self-transformation is not just about changing yourself. It means shifting yourself to a completely new dimension of experience and perception.”

—Jaggi Vasudev Join the discussion...

27

Our main aim in BeCollaboration is to bring people together, face to face, in a community where we share values, grow together and are aligned, to create projects and events that will have a lasting impact to improve our world. Logistically it is not possible for everyone to physically get to a meeting (yet) and so we have developed the next best thing.

Being in an online community with all of the same BeCollaboration ethos you can now access the same magic, connect with incredible BeCollaboration members and get the same generous spirit from our online community.

Follow the link Join the Platform to become a member. There you will find articles, videos, discussions and information to help you in your business and your life. Learn from the community, share your knowledge, support and help others, near and far. Plus discover those who are aligned and are nearby to you, where there are events close by – or worth travelling to.

Invite your friends in, no matter where they are in the world. The common denominator?

Being passionate about making a difference to others and working in your genius, your flow, to make it happen. Discover others who share your passion and create something together – Together we are stronger.

What could you achieve if you had others to help you?

Come and find them on the BeCollaboration platform.

If you are a fan of the movie The Matrix you will remember a clip where Morpheus ask Neo if he wants to take the red pill or the blue pill‌.

Take the red pill and discover a new world of love, connection and abundance in BeCollaboration.

See you on the other side.

The BeCollaboration Platform

www.BeCollaboration.com

28

Erkan Ali

THE REALITY OF TRANSFORMATION

Join the discussion...

29

“Bullying in the 80’s was a way of life, and racism…well the attitude of the teachers was suck it up and don’t be such a big baby.”

In 1981 at age 12, I started at a new school in Hertfordshire having moved from North London.

On my first day before registration, a fellow pupil approached me in the playground, punched me in the face and called me a Paki… whilst behind him there was roaring laughter.

2-3 month excursions, it was magical.

These experiences gave me insight and a view of the world that in the 1970’s children my age generally did not have.

In 1980, my father had a desire to leave London This brutal encounter was the start of my life and get away from city life, he wanted a better with racism. life for us and our family and the plan was to set up a business in Cheshunt, Herts, just north The incident was a total shock, for many of London. It was only 10 miles away, but it was reasons. Firstly, I am not of Pakistani or even a different world to the one I was accustomed Indian descent, or even look Asian in any way, to. Growing up in North London was home, I secondly, I had never experienced this type of loved it. I was popular at school, and my friends behaviour in my life. Up until this moment, I had were, Greek, Turkish Cypriot, Italian, English, led a charmed life in every way. and many varying nationalities. We had them all, and I was just one of the crowd, these were Let me back up a bit, good times.

The eldest of 3 my family was of Turkish Cypriot origin and I was born in the England. We often had big family outings where all the aunts, uncles and family friends would congregate at a park location or at relatives house, where we had big BBQ’s Turkish style, which meant loads of food, drink and long summer days of fun. I loved my life, really, really. My Mother and Father had their own business, which as I recall meant my Dad always had ‘folding’, (ready cash) which for us meant the good things in life; restaurants, nights out and long holidays, even driving across Europe to Turkey and Cyprus on

On that day, the day of the racial attack, my beautiful world came crashing down. In my mind I was no longer the popular, charmed & privileged kid. I had become a VICTIM of racism. I was no longer seen as Erkan Ali, but a brown kid in a white world, and I hated it. I felt I had lost my identity, the legend that I had created, that had people buy into me had been shattered. In this world the world of the whites, I was, well, I was worthless.

In my North London school, I was in the top sets, and near the top of my class. I loved

www.BeCollaboration.com

30

learning and loved finding out about new I saved that advice for very special occasions, things; I had an innate desire to understand the but it never really helped, not in this school, it world around me. just made for more problems.

Meanwhile in Hertfordshire, I was put into the bottom sets and spent the first year repeating what I had already covered in my previous school. The kids in this school seemed more interested in disruption and the disrespect of their teachers and each other, than growing as individuals, it seems they took glee in being ignorant and defiant.

I was called Paki from then on, I hated it and I hated them for it. Why? Like I said I was not of Pakistani origin, but I hated it mostly because I had become a thing of ridicule and I was not seen for the awesome person I knew I was.

Sink or SWIM!

In that moment after being punched, that defining moment, just when I was coming to my senses, I had made up my mind. It was as Bullying in the 80’s was a way of life, and if the judge’s gavel had gone crack, across the racism…well the attitude of the teachers court room. was suck it up and don’t be such a big baby.

Complaints had been escalated all the way to White People are RACISTS!!! the Head Teacher and Department Heads, but they never did anything about it.

It was 1981 and that was my truth until January 1997, when my truth was questioned and my My Dad’s advice? whole world transformed. So, what did life with “If someone picks on you, punch them in the Racism look like? If I was waiting to get served face really hard and run,” at a bar and it took too long to serve me, it’s My troubles where just starting.

Join the discussion...

31

“...it’s the programme that shapes our view of our world and limits what is possible. We end up being constrained and choked by our own decisions from the past.”

because they were racist. If a white guy cut The Transformation Bit, me up in traffic, it’s because he was racist! If, the lady behind the counter checked my ten- Fast forward to January 1997, and I was on a pound note, it’s because she was racist! personal development course that promised breakthrough results and transformation. The Living like this was just the way it was, no ifs guy leading the course was this lanky white buts or maybes, in my mind WHITE PEOPLE Australian, who if I am honest, I really liked.

WERE RACIST, that’s how my world looked. To I had spent one and a half days loving the me, at that time it was as simple as black and course, then suddenly, it hit me. I could not white. stop thinking about that punch in the face and being called a Paki. I had never thought that Since the punch in the face, I had hardened. this programme would go there.

My sense of humour had become, spiteful and sarcastic, and I had the intellectual ability What was being presented was the principle to ridicule any individual. This was my way of of STORY. defending myself. Often, I could talk or laugh my way out of a potential fight or conflict. It This is how it goes: things happen in our world was better to leave me alone than take me and in our lives and WE ADD MEANING. It’s that on orally, intellectually or make fun of me; I meaning that shapes our lives. The bit about would usually come out on top. This way of ‘what happened’ gets filed in the annals of being, had become my survival mechanism. history, but it’s the meaning we live with, which The ‘whites’ liked me because I was funny, and traps us. The effect is an ever-shrinking vicious smart, but every now and then they would turn circle, a spiral of ever decreasing circles. In on me, so I had to be on guard all the time. I effect, we become trapped in our own echodid not trust them one bit, not even an inch. My chamber, in our own programme, and it’s the school experience was one of being on edge programme that shapes our view of our world all the time, I was living in fear, I felt alone. Even and limits what is possible. We end up being though I had lots of so-called ‘friends’, I never constrained and choked by our own decisions felt they really knew who I was, and what was from the past. amazing about me.

I had spent sixteen years being a victim of www.BeCollaboration.com

32

racism, I would see racism everywhere, In essence, we are the ones who create those filters, contexts and experiences. When you look at the world and all you see - as in my case, is white racist people, guess what you get? White racist people. I would see it in the slightest mannerism, a look or a comment.

My life had changed on that day in 1981 in the school playground, and everything that had happened since then had further compounded my story. A story that possibly anyone could have concluded, that White People are Racists, well the evidence was everywhere for me, right?

always needing to be validated. I had to prove I was better than them, know more, outsmart them and undermine them. Having this story in place was costing me heavily, my vitality, my connection, fun and not forgetting love. I had invested so much into this story, I had all the evidence, yet in that room I was able to see that story transforming before my eyes like a caterpillar does, metamorphosing into one of responsibility, love and compassion, the butterfly was born.

I had been afforded the opportunity of reconciling my past and creating a new future, like an etch-a-sketch, I had wiped it clean and invented a new future.

Wrong!

I just had the breakthrough of a lifetime, in a matter of moments my old reality was about to dissolve like the Wicked Witch in the Wizard of Oz when they poured water on her. In my STORY it began melting….melting away, in fact it had disappeared, fast!

One of Choice, Freedom & Adventure……the possibilities were endless.

When you take responsibility for your story, you can then transform it, to a new and powerful story, one that inspires you and others, one that contributes to the world at large.

And POOF it was GONE! Is this true?

What had just happened?

I was able to separate what had happened, I got punched in the face and called a Paki, from the bit that I had added – the meaning, my interpretation - that ALL WHITE PEOPLE ARE RACIST. What I got with this story in place was to be RIGHT and make white people WRONG, to invalidate them and if anyone tried to convince me otherwise, I would avoid them or dismiss them.

The impact of that story on my life had been immense, it left me arrogant, spiteful and

No, not really, even Landmark Education say, “we made up all this stuff to Empower you,” well my new story HAS transformed my life and it’s still impacting me 22 years later.

It’s been over 22 years that I have lived my life free of racism. Are people racist? Yes, but what I had seen on that Saturday in 1997 in the Landmark Forum, was that it was me who had become the racist!

White people did not stand a chance with me, and considering that the population in the UK is mainly white, you can see that it was

Join the discussion...

33

me who was at a disadvantage, I was the one who was missing out.

individuals working on themselves, contributing to each other, and embracing transformation.

My life now:

Put simply, a place where transformational breakthroughs happen.

Well I am surrounded with white people, in fact I have many more white friends than non- Erkan Ali - not a Paki. white, I live in a predominantly white town in Hertfordshire.

BeCollaboration & Engage, Creator & Co Founder I have been building BeCollaboration for the last five years, most of our members are white You can contact Erkan at: and I love each and every one of them, they contribute immensely to my life and I love that. erkan@becollaboration.com Through the power of transformation, I was able to re-establish and connect with the human race which I had lost, the power and magic of transformation is very much a part of my life and I have worked with thousands of people, people of all cultures and races. The work I did at Landmark Education and since has allowed me to have a life that was previously, unimaginable and dare I say, Impossible.

At BeCollaboration there is a community of www.BeCollaboration.com

34

Baiju Solanki

TRANSFORMATION - WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE ON THE COURT

Join the discussion...

35

On December 14, 2017 I flew out to India to go on a ten day yoga and meditation retreat. I had never done anything like this before, but after a number of years of personal challenges and turmoil, it came to the point where I needed to get away to be in a different environment and ‘find myself’.

context, this could seem quite trite, but it was.

I made a video about it and told many people how much it changed me. However, there is a phrase I use with my clients a lot - “What does that look like on the court?”. What I mean by this is, what does that change ‘look like’ in real life? For example, increased confidence in real life may look like doing something you haven’t When I arrived in Rishikesh, it was surreal, I done before. Courage may look like doing didn’t know anyone and I was in a place doing something that you have a fear around. something people have on their bucket lists.

So, during last year I was asking myself in my This wasn’t even on my bucket list. quiet moments, what did those ten days really do for me? The answer wasn’t always obvious Very quickly I was made welcome and to me, although many people around me said introduced to the other people there. The there was a change in me, and that it was not retreat was based at a yoga teaching college. so much a change, but a transformation.

There were around 15 people on the teaching course and about five of us on the retreat.

Fast forward a year. I decided I loved the experience so much I booked another ten-day The ten days were magical… wake up early yoga and meditation retreat over the Christmas for a cleansing routine, then yoga for an hour and New Year period. and a half, followed by pranayama (breathing exercises). Then breakfast, all before we went I booked into a different place, a new retreat to a philosophy class where we learnt about centre that had no teacher training as part of the traditions of yoga and all the peripheral it. I flew out mid-December and got there a benefits. This took us to lunch. week before Christmas. It was a lovely place, but very quiet. Quiet in the sense there weren’t After two hours of free time, we had another many people around. I checked in and met session of yoga before an hour of meditation. the owners, who I had got to know over the previous few weeks while I was booking the Although the teaching classes were separate place. to our retreat classes, during the free time, lunch and dinner we were all together.

I arrived on a Sunday with the retreat starting proper on the Monday.

Very quickly we all formed a strong friendship and shared many, many stories.

The timetable was very similar to the previous year’s, but a couple of different classes. I woke The retreat itself, was life changing and the on Monday at 6.30am for the cleansing class friends I made were lifelong - at the time I and my first yoga class at 7.30am. When I got believed it was transformational for me. there the teacher was there with his mat and me! That was it, there was no one else there.

I learnt that life is fragile, that people who don’t know you, value you and all the answers you I didn’t say anything just got on with the class, are looking for come from within. Outside of which in effect was a 1-2-1 class. After yoga we www.BeCollaboration.com

36

“It was this moment it hit me, I can transform without feeling I need to get rid of all my thorns. Looking at my life all I saw were many, many thorns.”

had a pranayama class, again on my own. At the end of this class it was breakfast time. The owner came to see me while having breakfast and asked if everything was ok, I said yes, but where is everyone else? Nervously he said I was the only one booked on this retreat and the next group was starting after Christmas the day before I was leaving. At first I was a little disappointed and annoyed he didn’t tell me before. The previous year was a great experience and one of the main reasons was the great new people I met and the friendships I formed.

The next day I woke up with a different mindset embracing the solitude I was to experience.

The day was very structured, wake at 6.30am, yoga, pranayama, breakfast, mantra class, then lunch, free time, before yoga and then meditation before dinner.

The transformation for me happened on day three.

I was sitting in my room during the afternoon watching a YouTube video Boy Sadhguru, an Indian yogi mystic “How do I Transform Myself”

I went back to my room thinking this is going to He said that transformation means nothing of be a long ten days… the old remains. The example he cites is that of a thorn plant. This thorn plant will turn into a How wrong I was. rose plant but only if you nourish it, water and feed it. But when it does become a rose plant, I did the classes as scheduled that day, had my the thorns are still there, however we now call dinner still feeling a little down about no else it a rose plant, because the rose is what we around to share my experience. That evening see. The thorns don’t need to disappear for it to at sun down I said to myself “well I am here be a rose plant and in fact there are probably now, I can be sad about it, or embrace the more thorns. experience”. I was about to be alone for ten days and what could this open up. I had never It was this moment it hit me, I can transform in my life experienced this. It would be very without feeling I need to get rid of all my thorns. different from the previous year.

Looking at my life all I saw were many, many Yes, I would meet people when out and about, thorns. but to be alone on an experience like this was different.

How at 48 had I come to be in a hotel room in the North of India, alone, single, divorced with Join the discussion...

37

www.BeCollaboration.com

38

“In that moment I had two choices, have the attitude that it is, what it is, and you never know what life has in store for you, or look at all the choices and decisions I have made and take TOTAL responsibility for where I am in my life.” three kids at home and running a business that was ok, but not where I wanted it to be after 10 years. Financially ok, again nowhere near what I expected when I started ten years ago.

something really special. What could I do?

What can I control and focus on which would create the transformation I was looking for allowing for the thorns in my life.

It was a very intense life changing moment. In this moment I had what I can only describe as an out of body experience. I was very calm, I had had three days of clean food and meditative practice and I had one question going around in my head.

There were two things - Health and Wealth.

Health was OK, a little overweight, ate fairly healthily, but no real structure. Was I happy with my body condition and overall health? No, I wasn’t. In that moment I decided no more. I reached out, got a coach to help me with my In that moment I had two choices, have the diet and training. In four weeks, I had lost 5kg attitude that it is, what it is, and you never and felt great. know what life has in store for you, or look at all the choices and decisions I have made Wealth was nowhere near what I wanted it to and take TOTAL responsibility for where I be. Both personally and in business. I knew if I am in my life. This was very scary. By taking looked after the business the rest would take TOTAL responsibility for everything that had care of itself. So, I asked myself, what does happened to me, it meant that I could create transformation look like on the court. I decided what I wanted for the rest of my life…but then that every day of 2019, I was going to do three I asked myself, “What does this look like on things that contribute to my health and three the court?” How could I really start to grow the things that contribute to my wealth. rose?

So far in 2019 let’s say I am pleased with what Having that moment was fine, having that has been achieved. realisation was scary, but what does it look like on the court?

Transformation is what you choose to do on the court, all the rest is preparation.

I can’t change the past, I can influence the future based on what I think now and what I You can contact Baiju at: do now. baiju@enspirit.global So, if I was to look on my life now what were the most important things? My children were grown up, I had a business on the brink of Join the discussion...

39

Jackie Perkins

TRANSFORMATION – THE MISSING PIECE

www.BeCollaboration.com

40

It happens.

“Good is the Enemy of Great.”1

Like it or not, want it or not, it happens. Transformation is an apparent miracle of change.

How do we know? Because we see it, experience it and whatever it looks like, we recognise it because there’s more to it than simply change … isn’t there? For the purposes of clarity, here are the definitions and etymology:

25 years of being around transformation,

• change – to make, or become different; transformation – A marked change in appearance, form, nature, function or character, usually for the better • trans – towards the other side of; into another state or place. From Latin: across • form – outward appearance, used as a postfix. From Latin: shape, form, appearance or structure From this, we could surmise certain points. A ‘marked’ change: • can be measured and quantifiably demonstrated as different; • is somehow tangible and thus, the origin and result need also to be tangible; Note: Magicians conjure – this is not transformation!

• can render the ‘result’ in some way unrecognisable from its origin; in form, e.g. caterpillar to butterfly; in function, producing an unpredictable result e.g. breakthrough performance.

• Unpredictable suggests an element of experiment or discovery; we know we will see a butterfly, we don’t know its unique colouration; we work towards business results, but can they always be predicted?

Transformation – beyond the horizon?

Image consulting, learning and personal development have shown how many people are fearful or unwilling to venture into territory that might be unpredictable, including transformation. This uncertainty can evoke feelings ranging from excitement and adventure (bring it on) to fear and avoidance (if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it!)

Gina Gardiner2, refers in our November issue, to our survival being dependent upon the collective and impossible as an individual, where rejection means certain death – the risk of transformation therefore brings a real risk of rejection in your 21st Century communities, conversely a possibility of exciting adventures and opportunities to some who welcome change.

It takes courage to pursue the unknown, stand out from the crowd, be the first follower (reference) or the tall poppy3 but we also need to be recognisable, authentically, it’s a matter of being true to yourself, core integrity. Fellow Collaborator Nick Horton4 states his purpose as “connecting your vibe to your tribe” ensurGood to Great, why some companies make the leap and others don’t: Jim Collins, Random House 1

2

Quest by BeCollaboration: Nov 2018

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tall_poppy_ syndrome 3

4

http://nick-horton-photography.com/

Join the discussion...

41

www.BeCollaboration.com

42

Table 1: (See above) source Emotional Mastery

ing you portray your authentic, powerful self through imagery, enabling you to fine tune what you’re looking for with the added bonus of being recognised by your tribe. What if your current community, (tribe) isn’t a 10/10 fit?

Nothing wrong, just a simple case of finding a ‘better match’ or bringing your current tribe along with you! What difference would that transformation provide?

Transformation energises. People agree that they feel more energised, as if they have let go of something which was holding them back.

Releasing and letting go is researched and quantified by David R Hawkins5, demonstrated

by Michael Singer6 and touched upon in this issue (Sanjay’s article). Table 1 summarises this via the principle of entropy7. Imagine there’s a finite amount of energy available to you at Transformation: the journey, not the destination any moment. In a state of enlightenment (inner peace8) 100% of this energy is available for Having personally witnessed and experienced action, conversely, if this energy is being used transformation, it took courage, perseverance, to suppress or hold on to feelings and emodetermination and an ability to play. Transfor- tions (good or bad), proportionally less energy mation disrupts. It isn’t always an easy, nor is available. even comfortable journey, but so much more enjoyable when I ‘went with the flow’.

5 Letting Go and Power vs. Force; As humans we are therefore, uniquely positioned to consciously address our transforma- 6 The untethered Soul & The Surrender Experition. If we can’t guarantee the result but are ment: Michael Singer being authentic and true to core values, purpose and belief, then it seems the results are 7 Entropy: a (thermodynamic) quantity repreworth it – enjoying the journey makes it so; senting the amount of energy in a system that does the caterpillar resist its journey? is no longer available for doing (mechanical) work Since it’s “usually for the better”, grateful thanks go to the pioneers, first followers and tall pop- 8 For playful research, watch Kung Fu Panda 1, pies for allowing us to believe it’ll be worth it!

2 & 3: DreamWorks Animation Transformation: freeing the energy Join the discussion...

43

Ergo, releasing a significant amount of energy decorated with some new paint colours. Beenables transformation. neath the surface, energy transformation was tangible, an overbearing weight had been liftTransformation: physical environment ed and I could ‘breath’. And it wasn’t only me who noticed this; friends and visitors familiar Have you ever experienced a sense of ‘feeling with our home remarked on how different it at home’ or ‘belonging’ when you arrive some- ‘felt’. The drain, ever-present yet invisible was where? Can you recall the rise in your energy? noticeable by its absence. Surely the possibility of accessing more energy by aligning I felt my energy rise significantly as a client in your environment to ‘you’ is worth more than a the consulting chair at House of Colour hav- casual exploration? ing identified my ‘family’ of colours. Further discovering the key elements of my style per- Transformation of environment – results besonality was like being given ‘permission to be yond expectations: me’, no longer feeling like the round peg in a square hole. Clients regularly report similar ef- 10 years employed in a fabulous forward-thinkfects. Colour is energising. ing ‘Investors in People’10 company, promotion and progression while not altogether missing On engaging the services of a professional in- were mostly hard work and not remarkable in terior designer9 who understands our House my book! With this as my main work experiof Colour technology I experienced an unex- ence, I embarked on a new career as an Image pected and significant uplift in my energy, ex9 ponential, at home! www.annastonedesign.co.uk On the surface we ‘simply’ reorganised furniture, pictures, artwork and ornaments and re-

10

www.investorsinpeople.com/about-us

www.BeCollaboration.com

44

consultant with House of Colour. 18 months in and I discovered I had surpassed all my expectations (there weren’t many!) and from a standing start, had created the 4th largest franchise in the company; expediting the predictable journey by years!

ing YOU, upgrade your environment, including your physical appearance to honour your authentic self for transformation to hold or risk being ‘dragged back down’ every time you look in the mirror.

Ensuring true, empowered self is visible, is, inBy changing my tribe and occupation to some- itially, a conscious activity. Investing in yourself thing more aligned to my core purpose, energy so you can learn to achieve this effortlessly is was released to produce breakthrough results. called empowerment and you deserve this!

Transformation: permanent or temporary? A Transformation – the missing piece function of the holistic approach and LCD! We can all identify with the absurdity of wantIs transformation in some way more perma- ing to travel from London to Paris without first nent? reversible? inevitable? Or like a lottery ensuring we are in London. or at least having a win, Fluke? Can you influence or control it? If it plan of how to ‘move to the start line’, yet from isn’t permanent, is it transformation? Too much a personal perspective we often waste enerfor the scope of this article, it’s an enquiry worth gy comparing ourselves to others, wishing we considering! Ultimately for transformation to were someone or something different…. we are hold, it needs be integral, congruent, aligned who we are and it is up to us to make the most and holistic. of that- this is true transformation, like a caterpillar to a butterfly, something in integrity with Believability, credibility, even authority are di- who we really are. rectly related to consistency so a sudden and noticeable new image (e.g. hairstyle, outfit etc) If you’re not familiar with it, read ‘A return to is assumed to be for the benefit of an event Love’ by Marianne Williamson: “we are all such as an interview, new job or (change in) re- meant to shine”11. Free up your energy and lationship. We realign and normalise this new transformation is yours for the taking. level when we see it consistently, over time.

In the same way, with money, friendships, be- Enjoy the peace! haviours (consider addictions at the extreme) we tend to fall back to our comfort (familiar) You can contact Jackie at: zone. I call this the principle of LCD, Lowest Common Denominator because we fall to the Jackie.perkins@houseofcolourhq.com lowest point rather than rise up to the highest. www.houseofcolour.co.uk Finding your tribe and presenting yourself authentically to the world, means you can easily 11A return to love, Marianne Williamson as be identified. Surround yourself with people quoted by Nelson Mandela in his inaugural and environments which support YOU in be- speech.

Join the discussion...

45

www.BeCollaboration.com

46

A return to Love by Marianne Williamson Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.

Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness That most frightens us.

We ask ourselves Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?

Actually, who are you not to be?

You are a child of God. Your playing small Does not serve the world.

There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking So that other people won’t feel insecure around you.

We are all meant to shine, As children do.

We were born to make manifest The glory of God that is within us.

It’s not just in some of us; It’s in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine, We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.

As we’re liberated from our own fear, Our presence automatically liberates others.

Join the discussion...

47

Profile: Taking a look at a key Collaborator in the community.

Vanessa Louise Moore

www.BeCollaboration.com

48

emotions. Freeing myself of my human creation that is my EGO, so I may reveal and express my One thing I have come to learn over the years, essential self. So I may live in love and harmony is that I am not who I thought I was. I love the with myself first, my loved ones and the world labels of Mum, Wife to Be, Daughter, Sister, around me.

Auntie and friend, plus many other hugely important roles I have as my relationships are My passion is sharing with others, the benefit of utmost importance to me. of my learnings as a way for them to do the So in answer to the question “Who is Vanessa same.

Louise Moore?”, I am pure Joy, connected to source in my essence, while living in this 3D If you could choose one BeCollaboration world as the labels above and more. value that you identify with, what might that A unique quality I’ve recognised about myself, be? is my ability and willingness to see the beauty and Love in everything.

Well that’s a given - LOVE Who is Vanessa Louise Moore?

LOVE for me is the greatest power in the Universe. Everything is about LOVE or the That’s easy, HARMONY! That feeling of flow lack of love. Love is a constant. Love is all and ease within myself, my connections and encompassing. Love is accepting. Love is relationships with others, and seeing others unconditional. It’s simply whether we allow it around me at ease. HARMONY, HARMONY, into our lives or not.

HARMONY. You have been a member of BeCollaboration What is your reason for BEing? Or in other for a while now, can you remember what/ words what are you passionate about? who first attracted you to the organisation?

What fills you with joy?

My whole reason for BEing is to experience, viscerally, BLISS. BLISS for me is ultimate pleasure. That unconditional love that turns the world, grows the grass and beats our hearts is flowing through me.

My darling friend Baiju Solanki introduced me to Gill and BeCollaboration and at my first meeting I felt as though I had come home.

Home feeling like a safe place for me to express myself without fear of being judged or ridiculed. A community of the most beautiful I also understand I am a human being and people who only want the best for me, and see ultimate pleasure is impossible 100% of the only the best in me while contributing to my time. evolvement as a human being first, and then as a business person.

So, my reason for BEing is to navigate myself as best I can through this 3D life, while BeCollaboration is a truly unique group of like experiencing, managing and releasing my hearted people who genuinely want to see Join the discussion...

49

www.BeCollaboration.com

50

others and our world be the Joyous creation they are meant to be. The key thing is that we are all willing to do something about it by becoming the very best versions of ourselves that we can be first.

The time, energy and love that Erkan and Gill have spent on the creation of BeCollaboration is ground breaking, and I believe the power it has to create the positive change needed in our world today should not be underestimated!

Lastly, as I left my very first meeting, I was sure I wanted to be a part of BeCollaboration that I asked for a sign. Anyone who knows me knows that hugs are one of my very favourite things in the world. As I was leaving and saying my goodbyes, Mr Alan Brown came up to me and said ‘Not before you’ve had a hug’‌BOOM there it was - my sign.

it a more painful process. However, so much more worthwhile and valuable is our learning as a result.

We are all born to transform from the caterpillar into the butterfly, it’s nature. Most of us give up in the cocoon stage because it’s too dark and we can’t see a way out, I very nearly did myself many times. But here’s what I have learnt - It’s a CHOICE. How do you share YOUR passion with the world?

Firstly, by being the example. I walk my talk and have been my own best client.

I share from the benefit of my experience through speaking, workshops, writing, mentoring and Energy Alignment Therapy.

This issue of The Quest has focused on ‘Transformation’, has that manifested in your Life has trained me and that is why I believe life? others trust me with my service.

Oh, my goodness yes! Many times. đ&#x;˜‰ Transformation is my game. So naturally I had to go through my own transformations many times to be able to support and guide others through their own transformations.

I often say “I am my work and my work is me�, 24 hours a day 7 days a week. And I love it!

Whether it be transforming my body shape, my mindset or my life, I believe transformation is something that happens within ourselves and our lives as a constant. We just happen to get in the way of the natural transformation, making

How I understand the question is Yes, I am free to operate within my Genius because if I didn’t, I wouldn’t be living and loving with integrity.

Everything I do as me or within my work is about Harmony, my connection to my inner

Are you free to operate within your Genius?

What does that mean for you?

Join the discussion...

51

“Life has trained me and that is why I believe others trust me with my service.”

being and how I express myself as best I can and as often as I can. For me it’s a daily choice to connect with my essential self, first by way of my energy practice Chi Gung. I am then in a position of strength to steer the course of my day as best I can and more importantly be a pillar for those around me who may need support and guidance throughout their day.

What vision do you have for your business working with the BeCollaboration community?

My Vision hasn’t necessarily changed since being a part of BeCollaboration, but the exciting and key thing is that I now know that pathway is possible with the love and resources of BeCollaboration. And that for me is powerful.

THANK YOU!

perspective what might they expect when they get there?

After my first meeting, my daughter asked me “how was your meeting Mum?” I replied, “Fabulous thank you darling. They care more about who you BE rather than what you do”.

Her reply, “so it’s more about BEsness rather than business”.

She was spot on.

I have always said, at the centre of any business, is people. At the centre of your business is You. The more successful (in your state of wellness and joy) you are as a person, the more successful your business is.

Can you share how the BeCollaboration community has supported you and given you BeCollaboration has it all. BeCollaboration is a vision going forward for your business or a place for you to develop into the very best indeed your life? version of yourself with the magic formula of love, understanding, resources and more, My greatest fear, ironically, is being visible. while connecting with people who make your Because for as long as I can remember I have heart sing, your smile widen, and your purpose not felt safe in my life. My heart would be become a reality. pounding, and my legs felt like they won’t hold me up. Yet I have had the courage to stand up You can contact Vanessa at: and be seen with the knowing that I am held in a safe space, with no judgement or criticism vanessa@trustvanessa.com but only love for me as me.

In a world that wants you to conform so we all stay small and fearful, BeCollaboration was created to set us free.

If someone is interested in coming along to a BeCollaboration meeting, from your www.BeCollaboration.com

52

The Quest Invitation to visit.

BeCollaboration believe that true collaboration – as you have witnessed here in The Quest, occurs when people develop and deepen their relationship, building trust through sharing their authentic self. This doesn’t generally happen as a result of online communication. Meeting face to face is the best way to create amazing possibilities where wonderful projects happen. The Quest is just one such project.

We believe that meeting regularly is fundamental to our growth and learning so we have monthly meetings for guests and Collaborators to meet and discuss new ideas, issues and potential solutions.

Each meeting delivers knowledge sharing, business insights, personal development opportunities as well as thought leaders in the making presenting their genius to the room. All of this in an atmosphere where fun and laughter are paramount. At the end of the meeting, we find no one wants to leave so we continue the conversations in a social get together for as long as you want to stay.

If you would like to visit and meet our community you are very welcome. There is no cost to attend, simply bring an open mind and a listening heart.

You can get full meeting information including upcoming dates and venue details here www.becollaboration.com just click on ATTEND A MEETING. We look forward to meeting you soon.

53

Dates: 1st May London, Park Royal, 10th May Herts, Hertford 16th May Surrey, Banstead 17th May Liverpool Liverpool 28th May London Shad Thames

14th June Herts, Hertford 20th June Surrey,

Banstead 25th June London, Shad Thames 12th July Herts, Hertford 18th July Surrey, Banstead 23th July London, Shad Thames

What happens at a BeCollaboration meeting.

2pm – 3pm is the Introduction for guests. Learn more about what inspires us to be part of the community, our journey so far and how to make the most of your visit.

3pm – 6pm The Collaborators will join you to share, create, discuss, inspire and learn – plus have fun!

6pm onwards there is always a social vibe to continue the conversation, you are very welcome to stay and we can get to know you more too.

We look forward to welcoming you to a BeCollaboration event soon.

www.BeCollaboration.com

54

“Transformation is a process, and as life happens there are tons of ups and downs. It’s a journey of discovery - there are moments on mountaintops and moments in deep valleys of despair.”

Rick Warren

Join the discussion...

55