Primary School age children

Children of this age begin to understand that death is permanent and irreversible. Not being given sufficient information can lead children to ‘fill in the gaps’ with their imagination. They can become anxious about their own and other’s safety.

At this age children need honest answers which can be built upon over time. They need opportunities to express their concerns and feelings to a trusted adult.

Teenagers

Teenagers have an adult understanding of death but may have their own strong beliefs. Bereaved young people often struggle to ask for support and can feel extremely isolated. Some young people may become withdrawn whilst others may become disruptive or increase their risk-taking behaviours.

All infants, children, and young people

Regardless of their age, bereaved children benefit from having a key person who they can trust, talk to, and be reassured by. It is important to give children age-appropriate honest information following the death of a loved one and to include and involve them in the funeral, memorials, and any decision making. Maintaining a routine, including school attendance, and ‘normal’ boundaries is helpful for grieving children.

Your child’s nursery, school, or college can offer support for them in their setting. Your child’s health visitor or school nurse can support you with any behavioural changes your child may display or experience whilst grieving.

Your key worker and other professionals can direct you to specialist services to support bereaved children locally if required.

For further information about children’s reactions to grief and how to support them, visit the Child Bereavement UK website, www.childbereavementuk.org