Beutiful Magazine - The Strength Issue - Fall 2019 by Beutiful, LLC

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STRENGTH // FALL 2019

Photo Credit: Zelda Elisco

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hey there, beauty!

We took a little break, and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s so good to be back! The time away

while I completed my studies has truly shown me, more than ever,

how important it is to continue producing positive media sources for women.

Not only am I in shock about what is going on politically in America, but my relatively new position as a therapist has further opened up

my eyes about why diversity and representation needs to be a higher priority - not only in government but in media.

Being able to be face to face with women who are struggling with self acceptance and healing old hurts and trauma has further

solidified my dedication to empowering women and ensuring that

there are safe, supportive spaces for them. The weight that women are carrying every day, on top of the social and societal pressures, is overwhelming. Myself and the Beutiful team are honored to

continually be able to provide an escape and a dose of reality. Until next time, we hope you enjoy your holidays!

Questions / Comments? Feel free to email me at info@beutifulmagazine.com! P.S. The images in this issue are not our own unless specified.

Our cover image is by artist and photographer Zelda Elisco for her project Strength Marks. Check out her work and our interview with her on page 8!

Photo Credit: Zelda Elisco

meet our team!

PATRICIA

AMY

KATE

MARTINA

Editor of Beutiful, Patricia Colli is a licensed social worker working as a therapist in Philadelphia.

Graduated UVic majoring in Theatre - a singer, songwriter and musician based in Toronto. She is also a volunteer youth worker at a local shelter. Kate has a BA in Sociology & Social Policy. Alongside her work with NPOs, Kate currently operates a Marketing/Branding studio on the west coast of Canada. Martina is an artist and student at Salisbury University. She is passionate about sending a body positive message.

LAUREN

JAMILA

SOPHIE

Resides on Long Island, NY. Bachelor degree in Graphic Design. Loves being a part of the Beutiful movement. Jamila Choyce is a print and runway plus size model, actress, talk show hostess, journalist and creator of Jamila Jay’s Plus Size Revolution. Sophie Reymond is a writer and an advocate for body-positivity, self-love, and health. You can check out her work on Instagram, @AbsoluteSelfLove.

MEFTIHE

ERIN

JACKIE

From Melbourne, Australia. BA in Social Sciences, Policy and Research. Passionate about social education and helping to create a media literate world. Erin Miller is a writer living in New York City and she is passionate about feminism, body acceptance and social issues.

Jackie Bluzer is a writer, illustrator and poet. She has also been an editor for online magazines and has illustrated books for publication.

We’re looking for contributors! Send a message

to patti@beutifulmagazine.com if you’re interested in joining our team!

Photo Credit: Fenty

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Over the years, weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve launched several bodypositive, self esteem campaigns for both men and women. With the launch of our new website, we are proudly sharing the stories of our biggest supporters - you guys! Visit our website or use the hashtag #GoBeUtiful to keep up with our latest body-positive movements, or get involved by submitting your own story and picture!

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Photo Credit: New York Fashion Week 2018

whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s inside... 08 18 26 30 38 46

Strength Marks

An interview with photographer and artist Zelda Elisco

My Journey With Infertility By designer Lauren Jesus

Surviving Abuse

By Jameelah Johnson, submitted by Jamila Choyce

Plus Size Model Stellita

By Stella, submitted by Jamila Choyce

My Body My Space

By illustrator Jackie Bluzer

Look At Me: Yvonne Jackson

By Yvonne Jackson, submitted by Jamila Choyce 7

STRENGTH MARKS An interview with photographer and artist Zelda Elisco California-native Zelda Elisco has made it her mission to show women the beauty in parts of their bodies they struggle with the most. With her talent and vision, women around the world are turning their relationship with stretch marks into Strength Marks. Tell us about yourself! Surprisingly enough, my education and career focus is actually environmental conservation and design! Growing up in a sleepy beach town in California, I spent a lot of my childhood at the beach or in the forest playing, so I have always felt passionate about protecting our planet. I was gifted my first camera when I was 13 years old. From there, I fell in love with photography and was constantly taking photos. I have always been interested in lots of different hobbies; cooking, dancing, singing, painting, etc. Now that I am out of college, I like to sprinkle as many of my favorite hobbies into my daily routine! When did you become interested in body positivity and involved in this community? I first began taking an interest in body positivity in high school. My senior year, I worked with a small group of classmates to write a gender neutral dress code that was then adapted by our entire school. The year long, painstaking process sparked my interest into wanting to explore the complicated issues of gender, sexuality, slut-shaming, along with other culture constructs.

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Later, when I began college, I became surrounded by other women constantly competing with each other to look the best. I was exposed to a lot of body-negativity and became very aware that our society had a huge problem to solve; we need to reteach women how to love themselves.

What was the main inspiration behind Strength Marks? Strength Marks was motivated by the desire to create a space of healing for all the amazing women in my life. After 22 years of listening to every person I admired talk negatively about their bodies, I felt I had a duty to create a series that highlighted insecurities and promoted body acceptance. I decided to focus the project on scars, stretch marks, wrinkles, and all other “imperfections” that society deems not worthy. Later, I became inspired by one of Sara Shakeel’s body positive glitter art pieces to incorporate glitter in my project. Of course, being the environmentalist I am, I chose to use biodegradable glitter! There are many marks on a woman’s body that cause insecurity - what made you choose stretch marks? Although the project is open to all scars, marks, wrinkles, etc - there is a universality to stretch marks that continues to surface. Thus far in the project’s timeline, stretch marks have been the most common subject to photograph on my participants. However, I am super interested in incorporating more participants who are willing to highlight their wrinkles and other marks. How do your models come to be involved in the project? At first, I only photographed my friends and family. However, once the project began to spread, I started receiving requests to participate! These days, I try to photograph as many humans as possible wherever I am. My dream is to travel across the world and capture more incredible stories and people.

Photo Credit: Zelda Elisco

Strength Marks, contâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d

What is the photographing and preparation process like with the models? I conduct photoshoots outside, in natural light. I set up the space and then have each person select their shade of glitter that I will use. Painting the glitter on the model almost always erupts into a candid, tender, conversation about self love. I think by creating a safe space to shoot, the model feels brave enough to dive immediately into discussing their journey with body acceptance.

Once we begin shooting, the energy of the space becomes very positive and happy! I love watching each participant grow more confident in themselves with each new pose. There is always a remarkable difference in character from when the model arrives, to when they leave. It is almost as if a weight has been lifted off their shoulders, and they leave the shoot feeling more confident and aware of their divine value. How have women responded to seeing their bodies in such a positive light through your pictures? When I reveal the photos to each participant, the response is always overwhelming! It is as though each model can hardly believe that the strong, confident person in the photograph is them. Women all around the world have been so supportive and encouraging of the project. When people write in, I love reading the stories they share. Many people feel comfortable enough to reveal how the project has impacted them and share their own struggles with body acceptance. I feel honored.

Photo Credit: Zelda Elisco

Strength Marks, cont’d

You’ve shot beautiful images in so many locations for Strength Marks. Have you noticed a difference in women’s attitudes toward their body in different areas of the world? I would say no. In my experience, no matter where you are in the world, it is quite obvious that the message women have been taught is “we are not good enough.” Therefore, I find that most women’s attitude towards their bodies is negative. Rarely, I will encounter someone who is truly confident in who they are - and to that I applaud them. However, there is one positive to women being taught they aren’t enough: we all have a common ground, a source of empathy, we can use to relate and understand each other. Every woman can understand the struggle of body acceptance. Now it is just a matter of using that understanding, that power we all share, to dispel societal beauty standards and support each other.

Strength Marks has been a huge part of my daily practice of self love. If I am going to ask people to practice loving their insecurities, I realize I have to do the same. The project has also been a huge creative outlet and allowed me to create a massive love letter to woman everywhere. On the Strength Marks Instagram account, you have beautiful quotes and line drawings alongside the images. Are you the artist behind them? Yes! I do all the artwork for Strength Marks. It is so much fun to be able to add another artistic element to the project. I have always loved art and I love bringing some of my favorite interview quotes to life with art sketches.

What has your own relationship with body image looked like? Has this project helped you with your own relationship to your body? Growing up, I always wanted curves. When I finally began growing them in college, I had a lot of anxiety about gaining weight and covering up my stretch marks. I remember feeling like I was losing control of the familiar body I had had for 20 years. I began counting every calorie, and religiously exercising.

At a certain point, my body snapped and I knew I had to change my lifestyle habits. Looking back, I understand how disillusioned my perception of myself was. I wish I could have shaken myself and screamed, “Stop doing this to yourself! Other things are more important!” Over the following years, I began focusing on my inner health and less on what I looked like. I prioritized how I felt, and worked on taking care of myself from the inside out.

Photo Credit: Zelda Elisco

Strength Marks, cont’d

Is there one particular model or story that has stood out to you? Or perhaps an important moment you experienced while doing this project? Every photoshoot is so special to me. I am always touched by how vulnerable each participant cares to be. I remember, in one of the earliest shoots, the model told me after that she felt truly happy being photographed and sharing her scars. It felt so good to receive positive feedback about the project. It was in that moment that I realized what Strength Marks could be for people.

Photo Credit: Zelda Elisco

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What is your ultimate goal for Strength Marks? What impact would you like this project to have? The ultimate goal for Strength Marks is to continue growing. I would love for the community of participants to expand internationally. In the future, I would like to publish the interviews and photos as a book. From where I am standing, there are limitless opportunities.

If you could tell women just one piece of advice, what would it be?

Be kind. Be kind to others, and be kind to yourself. I think we forget that our first role is taking care of ourselves, being our own source of nurture. It’s so important to advocate, take time, and let yourself heal. It is something I am practicing every day.

Zelda Elisco is an environmental designer and the founder, photographer and artist behind the body positive movement Strength Marks. You can learn more about Zelda’s work and Strength Marks on the Strength Marks website or Instagram account!

Photo Credit: Zelda Elisco

Would you like to get involved in Strength Marks? You can contact Zelda or apply to be a model in the Strength Marks project by visiting the project’s website strengthmarks.com! And don’t forget to check out and follow the Strength Marks Instagram page! 16

Photo Credit: Zelda Elisco

MY JOURNEY WITH INFERTILITY

By designer Lauren Jesus, Beutiful

I was always the little girl who loved baby dolls and babies. When my younger cousins were born I would act like a little mommy and try an care for them. I’ve always seen children in my life and never imagined having them would be anything but easy. When I was diagnosed with an autoimmune disease in my late teens, I learned that infertility was a common issue that went with the disease. A couple of years later I was diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, I was told that infertility and difficulty conceiving were issues I could face but were not impossibilities. I stayed optimistic through the diagnosis’ and would deal with any challenges I could face when my husband and I decided to start a family. Four years ago my husband and I made the decision that it was the right time to try for a family. I have an autoimmune disease and PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome) so this decision involved loads of doctor appointments and further testing to make sure that my body was ready to carry a child. I passed all my tests and we began to try.

Nothing happened for months. This was incredibly disheartening to think that I wasn’t able to get pregnant. I didn’t let it get me too down because I knew that there are medications and procedures that could be done to help people in our situation. Over the next couple of months I had more testing and examinations done, my husband also had a sperm analysis. After a few weeks we received our results, my husband had no issues with his tests. I however was told that I wasn’t ovulating properly. I was given a medication to help me ovulate and we tried again. After my first round of medication I became pregnant. We were ecstatic. I felt pregnant very early on, I had an immediate aversion to some foods and some foods tasted different. It was incredible. My husband was extremely attentive and always checking on me. I was also really tired all the time. We downloaded an app to follow the growth of our child and see how big they were each week. I remember feeling so incredibly amazed by what my body was doing. I would rub and hold my stomach at night because I wanted to instill as much love as I could into my growing child. Then a couple of days after our positive pregnancy test I had the worst cramping. I felt cold, ill and had the worst bleeding. I suffered a miscarriage and I felt completely distraught. My husband and I mourned the loss of our child, but to be honest I still carry the pain inside of me to this day.

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I went through a range of emotions. During this time people in my family were conceiving so easily in less stable relationships. I blamed myself for miscarrying, thinking it was something I had done wrong or did to cause us to lose our child. On top of miscarrying, the medication I was given to help me ovulate reacted badly with my autoimmune disease. I suffered a really bad relapse with my autoimmune disease that was causing a lot of damage to my liver, it would take me a few months to recover. My miscarriage is something Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve never gotten over and to this day I still carry it with me. I think the reason I have never moved on from our loss is because of all the what ifs surrounding that

pregnancy. My husband and I had been discussing children for over 10 years before we had tried to conceive. During the weeks leading up to taking a pregnancy test we talked so much about the baby and how happy we were that this was happening. We wondered who the baby would look like more, what their personality would be like, and we talked about how we would reveal our pregnancy. It was and still is difficult to let go of all of those dreams. After my miscarriage it took me a couple of months before I was comfortable having sex again. It brought back the memories of the loss we had suffered. When I was finally ready to have sex again I became incredibly depressed when I would get my period each month. I still held out some hope that we would somehow magically be able to conceive on our own, but that would never happen. For the last 3 years we put having a child on hold because I just never felt ready. This past summer we were finally ready to go back down that road and had an understanding of how far we were willing to go to have a child. I saw a new gynecologist and was told that my only choice would be to do IVF. My husband and I long ago had decided that with all of

My Journey With Infertility, cont’d

the medical procedures I have to go through on a regular basis, it wasn’t worth us exploring. So this was the end of our journey of trying to have a biological child. For me, it was a difficult thing to accept. We had joked and talked about these “imaginary” children we would have one day that they became real. They had names and middle names and personalities we had already created for them. To me it felt like a death. By ending our attempts to get pregnant these amazing children would never exist. I told my therapist about how I had felt and she reassured me that it was completely normal to feel that way. Even though I’ve gotten to a place of acceptance with not being able to conceive I still have days where I cry and feel angry about it. During this entire process my husband and I had always discussed adoption. I was never against adoption, I had just never really thought much about it because I was so focused on carrying my own children. One day my husband explained the importance of adoption and being able to give a child a life it may not have otherwise. It completely opened my mind to the process of adopting a child. I still had fears about

adoption. I was afraid the children we adopted would leave us in the future for their biological parents. My therapist reassured me that it wouldn’t happen. She said the children would be curious about their parents which is natural, but they would know why they weren’t with them anymore and wouldn’t leave a healthy stable situation for one that isn’t. I was also uneasy about how you go about selecting children to adopt. Thankfully a few of my husband’s friends at work have expanded their families through adoption and hearing about their experiences has eased any fears I had about the process. I still worry about how people will judge me for adopting and not being able to have biological children, which I know is silly. I think a common worry is if your family will accept and love adopted children the same they would biological. But honestly who cares what anyone else thinks? It’s YOUR life. There is no wrong way to have a family and there are so many children who need loving families at adoption agencies. Lauren Jesus lives on Long Island, New York. She graduated from The Art Institute of Pittsburgh with a BA in Graphic Design. Part of the Beutiful team, Lauren also designs and creates goodies on Etsy. You can see her work at the Gremlin Design Etsy shop!

#AllGenders Swimsuits For All and King Size has teamed up in a campaign that

celebrates swimwear for all genders and all sizes. The size-inclusive

women’s swimwear brand and men’s big and tall brand joined forces in summer 2019 to bring body positivity to all.

Model Ashley Graham, who is also involved in the project, said,

“As the body positive movement becomes more inclusive, and we

continue to inspire women to love and embrace the skin that we’re in, it is important that we invite everyone to join the conversation. We know that women’s bodies are historically more judged and

scrutinized, but we also recognize that men are subject to those

pressures as well. This partnership shows our continued commitment

to represent and celebrate different body types and sizes, supporting the confidence journey for everyone. Guys, we see you, too!”

Photo Credit: Swimsuits For All & King Size

SURVIVING ABUSE By Jameelah Johnson, submitted by Jamila Choyce, Beutiful

I was born in Saint Louis, Missouri and reared in Fort Wayne, Indiana with my mother and stepfather. Trauma was my mainstay of life at an early age. At age four, I was sexually abused by my motherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s acquaintance. I can vividly remember that he continuously made me lay down on a towel, and he would go into the bathroom to clean himself off. At only five years old, my big brother was my protector and tried to fight off my rapist. I would hide behind the stove and kitchen table. As a child, it gave me empathy and a caring heart. I never told anyone until I was 40 years old. I believe that God did not want to reveal the secret. It would have been devastating for me as a four-year-old child, but at age 40 my mother does not believe me. It was still devastating. The trauma did not stop. The molestation and the rape of a child is so unspoken. It is not even whispered, but it did happen again. I was intrigued by a two-wheeled vehicle. It was a roaring thunderous sound that commanded my attention, and it was shiny and silver like a new dime. I was mesmerized, so I asked for a ride. This stranger with a motorcycle molested me while steering this vehicle, and he raped me in an abandoned house. At age five, I still remember my mother, oldest brother and I fleeing in the middle of the night to Fort Wayne, Indiana to get away from my abusive biological father and that is where my mother met my stepfather. As a first-grader, I was in segregated school. I enjoyed being around different cultures. My white peers were friendly and very kind, but we could only be friends at school. From elementary to high school is a mental blur but I do recall being bullied in junior high school and high school. Also, I do recall meeting the father of my children.

Surviving Abuse, cont’d

During my senior year in high school, I met a handsome mature guy. He had a child, but he seemed to love me. His father was a functioning alcoholic which left alcohol readily available for my children’s father. Later he became an alcoholic, a physical and mental abuser, and a drug addict. While in high school, the abuse started with a slapped across my face. Later he apologized, and cried, begged forgiveness. When my mother saw my first black eye, she gave me a bus ticket to Saint Louis, Mo. I stayed there for several months and returned to my abuser. Thus, began the cycle of abuse. It continues throughout graduation from high school and cosmology school. The abuse continues during my two pregnancies. The worse scenario of abuse was when I started to fight back. He hit me in the back of the head with an E & J bottle. At the hospital I received stitches, but I lied and said I bumped my head on an object. The last straw for me was when he hit me on the leg with a belt and I called the police. He was incarcerated for 8 months. That was the end of the relationship. Trauma has evolved in my life, but I continue to strive for excellence and truth. Modeling has allowed me to expand my creativity, and to tell my truth!

Jameelah Johnson’s story was submitted by Jamila Choyce, CEO of ChoycePlusModelsInc Live Your Best Life - Globe Ambassador for Plus Size Talent! Jamila Jay’s-PlusSizeCasting.com & Public Relations (PR) Service is geared towards Plus Size Casting who are seeking modeling, acting, movie and television roles, Plus Size pageants, reality and games shows, and docu-series. Go to JamilaJayPlusSizeCasting.com.

Jamila Choyce is a print and runway plus size model, actress, talk show hostess, journalist and creator of Jamila Jay’s Plus Size Revolution. She is also writing the “Plus Size Model Survival Guide.” You can visit her website or follow her on Facebook, Twitter, YouTube or Tumblr!

THE PLUS SIZE MODEL STELLITA

By Stella, submitted by Jamila Choyce, Beutiful

To truly understand what this experience meant to me, you must first know my story. Growing up I was pretty shy and selfconscious because I was one of those girls that developed early. I was pretty busty for a 10 year old which got me teased a lot. It made me feel different and awkward. Once out of that stage I was just your average girl. I didn’t start putting on weight until my 30s when I started having children. By then I was in full “working mommy” mode with no time for myself and tipping the scales at 190. I had my last child at 42 and now I was a whopping 250. Those shy awkward feelings came back only worse because now they included a negative body image. Although I appeared confident in my role as mom and in my career, Stella the woman was becoming more introverted and shy. I hated being the center of attention, I panicked if I had to walk into a room of strangers. I dreaded being in photos. Most of all I hated looking in the mirror. Instead of dealing with these feelings I hid behind the thing I did best. Being a mom. Now the crisis begins. My daughters are grown and have moved out to be the beautiful independent women that we raised them to be and my son has gone off the college. Uh oh, empty nest syndrome. What do I do now? Who am I? Depression sets in. Now I’m 277 pounds and really unhappy. Self-esteem? Gone. Self-worth? Non existent. At this point, I realize I need to take charge and lose weight. I start therapy, water aerobics hiking, and a diet. Finally, success! I’m excited, 70 pounds lighter, and at my lowest weight in 25 years. Stella, the woman, is starting to come out to play. I want new clothes to go with my new body so I go to a website that specializes in lingerie for 30

The Plus Size Model Stella, cont’d

plus size women. What a rude awakening that was. Every model was young and no bigger than a size 12. Although advertising sizes 3x-4x, not one of their models reflected that. No one looked like me. My self-worth was taking another hit, only now I’m angry about it.

I spent the next month practicing walking in heels, shopping for the right clothes and mentally preparing for the big runway walk. I thought I would be nervous, scared, panicky, terrified..... but I was none of those things. Instead, I felt empowered and free of my demons. Modeling has given me a huge boost to my self-confidence and self-worth. Room full of strangers with cameras? No problem. “Hello guys, yes take my picture.” Modeling is about diversity, inclusion, body positivity and so much more. Each model has a story to tell. For some this was a stepping stone on their career path, others a realization of childhood dreams and even some had to overcome physical or emotional obstacles to participate. Recently, one of the photographers asked me in an interview “Who is Stella?” I was stumped. I realized now, I couldn’t answer because she is a woman in transition, a woman reinventing herself. I’m a butterfly who’s finally broken free and is ready to spread her wings. Watch out modeling world, here I come!

Stella’s story was submitted by Jamila Choyce, CEO of ChoycePlusModelsInc Live Your Best Life - Globe Ambassador for Plus Size Talent! Jamila Jay’s-PlusSizeCasting.com & Public Relations (PR) Service is geared towards Plus Size Casting who are seeking modeling, acting, movie and television roles, Plus Size pageants, reality and games shows, and docu-series. Go to JamilaJayPlusSizeCasting.com.

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In January 2019 sitting in my living room with a friend, she says I should consider plus-size modeling. I laugh at her. “No one wants to see an old overweight grey-haired lady modeling.” “Stella the only difference between you and these women is that they own their curves. Stop looking at your faults and celebrate your assets. You have beautiful eyes and a nice rack you just lack self-confidence.” After some thought, it sounded good so I agreed to contact her casting agent. A few weeks later I did my first photoshoot. I got put in this clinging dress that I never in a hundred years would ever have picked but when that photo came back I was speechless “Is that me? She’s beautiful.”

There were about 25 of us in this class - all ages, ethnicities, sizes and skill levels. A diverse group with a common goal, to learn what we needed to succeed in this competition. The next 2 days were spent in front of the cameras. The photographers were so helpful and patient. It’s like they can see into your soul and find the beauty that is within just waiting to come out. Never once did I feel out of place or anything other than beautiful. Each click of the camera I became more comfortable and confident.

In April my agent sends me an email “You have an audition, good luck.” She had entered me into a modeling competition called Model Hunt. So off I go to LA for the casting call. I guess they saw something they liked because 3 weeks later I get an email saying I was a finalist. In June I went down for a mentoring class and photoshoots.

#AllBoobs Here’s a really sad statistic: only 56% of women talk about their

breasts in a positive way. Even sadder - most lingerie ads aren’t

even catering toward women - 71% of women think lingerie ads are

too male-focused, according to Tu Clothing. That’s why Tu Clothing

wanted to turn this around in a campaign that communicates that ALL boobs are welcome!

At the campaign’s core is real women wearing their bras and talking about their breasts, sharing what they call them. The names range

from ‘knockers’ to ‘lemon drops’, ‘fried eggs’, ‘crumb catchers’, ‘saggy and baggy’ and even ‘Ant and Dec’. This message focuses on the relationship women have with their breasts.

The end result communicates that however they’re shaped and

whatever they’re called, women will be able to find something suitable for their bodies at the Tu brand. 34

Photo Credit: Tu Clothing Photo Credit: Tu Clothing

Photo Credit: PARFAIT

Photo Credit: Tu Clothing

MY BODY MY SPACE

By illustrator Jackie Bluzer, Beutiful

Relationships can be triggering for so many women. Many times we suffer from the cruel unsolicited comments that come from family members, our peers, and our partners. These next pages, illustrated by Jackie Bluzer, perfectly portray the tricky space women must navigate to own their bodies and choices. The illustrations on the following pages are by Jackie Bluzer, who hopes to publish a full graphic novel in the near future. She has also recently illustrated the children’s book “Fawn’s Touching Tale: A Story for Children Who Have Been Sexually Abused (Help for Sexually Abused Children)”, which is available for purchase on Amazon!

Photo Credit: Miguel Bruna

Jackie Bluzer is a writer, illustrator and poet who has written for publications both in print and online. She has also been an editor for online magazines, as well as illustrated books for publication. If you’d like to get in touch with Jackie, you can email her here!

Illustration by Jackie Bluzer

LOOK AT ME: YVONNE JACKSON By Yvonne Jackson, submitted by Jamila Choyce, Beutiful LOOK AT GOD! LOOK AT ME! Who? Yvonne Jackson! I am a plus size model. Yes, I am a beautiful plus size model. I always wanted to be a model. In my family, I was the only girl with four brothers. I was a tall lanky tomboy. At a statuette height of 5â&#x20AC;&#x2122;9, I grew up with acres of legs, basketball dunking arms, an extended neck, and long torso. When I was a teen and wore sizes 5/6, 7/8, and 9/10, I was the quintessential model. I was beautiful, tall, and thin. I was born to be a model. It was my destiny.

Photo Credit: Ken Morrison

After the birth of my two children, I stopped modeling. Of course, I gained weight and I gained more weight due to life issues, challenges, and disappointments. My doctor confirmed the weight gain was due to stress. Nevertheless, I always wanted to model.

Photo Credit: Ken Morrison

I battled with losing the weight only to put it back on again. “Yo yo” dieting is not healthy. Yo yo dieting, also called weight cycling. It is a form of losing weight and then regaining it. It’s commonly thought that yo yo dieting leads to long-term struggles with weight and a greater risk of obesity. Numerous studies have tried to determine if these concerns are valid. Researchers recently reviewed 31 studies on weight cycling and its relationship to obesity and diabetes. I decided no more dieting of any shape, form, or fashion. Finally with the help of God I made up my mind that it no longer matter what size I am. I decided to love myself unconditionally and unapologetically. I wanted to model again. In 2017, I started to pursue plus size modeling by having professional photo shoots, and inquiring if anyone had any connections with a modeling agency. On June 1, 2019, through my networking event I had a fashion show featuring a vendor and her models. Although I wanted to model at the event, I couldn’t because I was the hostess. The fashion show was hosted by Jamila Choyce. She is an agent for plus size models. But nearly a week after my event, at 4:00 am Sunday morning, I received a message in my inbox from Jamila. She asked me if I would join her agency for plus size models, so here I am. Ladies and men, when God opens the doors of favor and opportunities for you, walk through them. You should not look back, or sideways, just keep walking. It does not matter where you are in life, what dress size you wear, where you live, what kind of car you drive, or how much money you have!

Yvonne’s story was submitted by Jamila Choyce, CEO of ChoycePlusModelsInc Live Your Best Life - Globe Ambassador for Plus Size Talent! Jamila Jay’s-PlusSizeCasting.com & Public Relations (PR) Service is geared towards Plus Size Casting who are seeking modeling, acting, movie and television roles, Plus Size pageants, reality and games shows, and docu-series. Go to JamilaJayPlusSizeCasting.com. Jamila Choyce is a print and runway plus size model, actress, talk show hostess, journalist and creator of Jamila Jay’s Plus Size Revolution. She is also writing the “Plus Size Model Survival Guide.” You can visit her website or follow her on Facebook, Twitter, YouTube or Tumblr! Photo Credit: Ken Morrison

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2018 - The Celebrate Issue

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2017 - The Glow Issue

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2018 - The Awaken Issue

2017 - The Embrace Issue

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2017 - The Rebirth Issue

2016 - The Renewal Issue

You can now view our magazines straight from the Beutiful website! 48

advertise with us!

Our digital mag is growing quickly in the body-positive community and we want to invite you to grow with us! If you have a great product or service that you think would benefit our readers, give us a shout at sales@beutifulmagazine.com!

get involved or join our team!

Are you a writer, model, blogger or advocate for body positivity and diversity? If you love what we stand for, we’d love to get your voice heard! Send us an email at info@beutifulmagazine.com so we can discuss how to get you published in our mag or on our website! We’re also looking for volunteer writers who can submit content on a semi-regular basis. If that sounds like something you’d enjoy, come say hi! We wanna meet you!

“Just because you are blind, and unable to see my beauty doesn’t mean it does not exist.” - Margaret Cho It’s time to undefine ourselves. Time to embrace the unique, individual beauty of being a raw, evolving human unwilling to “fit” into a society-imposed box.

Come out of hiding. Stop trying to collect material items, airbrush reality away, and hide behind a mask. Open up to limitless equality, acceptance, peace and vitality

by learning to appreciate who you are and the life you live. Our goal is to help you forget what perfection looks like…until you can just Be U.

CLICK THE HEADINGS FOR MORE INFO!

contribute If you’re interested in getting involved with Beutiful, give us a shout through email!

advertise

We accept ads on our website and future digital magazine issues. If you’re interested in getting your ad in, email us!

If you’re not already on our mailing list, get on it! This will ensure that you get all of our issues and stay up to date!

make a donation

We are an organization dedicated to doing good. Any gifted amount helps!

In making a donation, you’ll be helping us expand our services and resources, support more causes, create campaigns and get our message further.

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