Create a Pretty Life IT'S YOUR LIFE... MAKE IT PRETTY
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If you have lost the pretty in your life, I understand. I lost my passion, myself and my way. I stopped believing in myself. You know the scene. The lay on the bathroom floor, towel to the face with the ugly cry. OHHHHHHHH girl… I’ve been on that floor and the tears I’ve cried. You get to the point you don’t even know who you are anymore. One good thing about getting to that point. You begin to find your true self. You can build a pretty life on that foundation. I did it and you can too. You aren’t alone! Ready to create a pretty life?! Let’s Begin!
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nsure where to start to find what it is you love? Can’t remember when you stopped knowing yourself? It’s a gradual desacent. Then you sit motionless, look around and wonder where that confident girl went. Fret none! She’s still there, we just need to find her!
Start paying attention to what makes you stop and take notice to what makes you a little green with envy. Here are some examples: • Your neighbor quit her job and started taking classes at the local college. • Your coworker has started the process to adopt a child. • Your best friend met the love of her life online and is getting married in six months. Pay attention. What are some things that you have noticed that turn your eyes a little green with envy? Once you begin to take notice of what you may want in your life you have to take action. Noticing and thinking of what you want is just the beginning. This is where it gets exciting, but it also is going to require some work. Baby steps, start with baby steps! We seem to see what we think is an overnight success and we measure ourselves against the “superstars”. Guess what. That’s a rarity. There is usually a lot of hard work behind an overnight success.
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A YouTube star started with one video.
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A doctor started with one college class.
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A best selling book started with one sentence.
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Someone lost fifty pounds beginning with one ounce.
Once you begin to take notice of what you may want in your life you have to take action. There is usually a lot of hard work behind an overnight success.
KRISTIN SCHMIDT
Pay Attention What are the baby steps you need to do to start you on the path to achieving your goals?
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CREATE A PRETTY LIFE!
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Start with calling the college asking for class information, start a profile on a dating site, take a walk. Baby steps, baby! Then give yourself a pat on the back! You began! BRAVO! Chances are if you have a dream to do just about ANYTHING, someone else has had that dream and has achieved it. Seek them out and if you want or need some help, ask them! People are usually willing to help another out so the next person doesn’t have to go through all of the unnecessary mistakes, trial and error and hardship. Contact them. Simply explain what it is you want to do, ask for help. I have done this myself and thankfully I have gotten help and they pointed me in the right direction!
Who can you ask to help you? NAME
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CONTACT
KRISTIN SCHMIDT
Trust YOU When someone does help you send an old fashioned snail mail thank you note. We seem to get so busy that we send a text, email or nothing at all to say thank you when someone has done something nice for us. It takes just a few minutes, costs little but makes a huge impact. Keep a little pack of note cards and stamps at the ready to jot a note and send.
When you do begin getting your groove back, trust yourself that you know what you need to know to make yourself happy.
When you do begin getting your groove back, trust yourself that you know what you need to know to make yourself happy. You know yourself better than anyone on the planet could possibly know you. We start strong and then we start to doubt ourselves. We begin talking to people about what it is we want to do. We start getting opinions and advice. Whether we ask for it or not. Self doubt starts to creep in. We lose traction, and backslide. Don’t do that! STOP! You know YOU! Trust YOU You will need to ask yourself some questions •
Is what you’re working toward what you really want?
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Are you don’t what you think others want of you?
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Is this really your dream?
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Does this goal really fit your life where you are today?
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I have people I respect and I ask and listen to what they have to say. But at the end of the day I know I need to go with my instinct, make a decision and move forward. Adjust if you must as you go, but don’t get paralyzed by all of the influence around you. This is the place where many dreams come to an end. Stay the course! Keep going! As you start finding you again, try new things! You will discover things you never thought you would love as well as find things you don’t love! That’s part of the process as well. Here are a few things I have found I’m not feeling the love for. •
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ANY kind of organized dancing. I’ve tried belly dancing, line dancing and Zumba. No thank you. I’m a free style kind of gal. And I’m bad at that. Flower arranging or any kind of craft. Not A fan.
You don’t need to follow the crowd! Do what makes you happy. Just because it’s the most popular pin on Pinterest doesn’t mean you have to love it! Stop it! My entire home is pink, Pink curtains, couch, lamps even my KitchenAid mixer. Pink. My entranceway HOT pink.
Try new things! You will discover things you never thought you would love as well as find things you don’t love!
It’s not for everyone. But it’s for me. This goes for you home, hair and clothes. DO YOU!!! Is what you are working toward what you want or are you doing what you think others want of you?
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KRISTIN SCHMIDT
Don’t follow the crowd! Sometimes we have a dream in our mind about what we want for so long that we change and our dream changes, but we don’t stop and really realize the person we are now isn’t the same person that wanted whatever that dream was a long time ago. Take some time to really think about what of you truly want. Maybe it’s time for a new dream! Maybe it isn’t.
Take some time to really think about what of you truly want. Maybe it’s time for a new dream! Be honest with yourself.
Only you know for sure. Be honest with yourself. Brutally honest. I have had a few dreams I have gone after, achieved and then realized weren’t for me anymore. One was a soy candle company, this is a two fold story. •
It shows you that you don’t have to have it all figured out to just begin
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I listened to my own heart when I knew it wasn’t for me, even though it appeared to be “successful”.
I started the soy candle company with a few pounds of wax I melted on the stove in a metal coffee can. I had no clue how to make them. There was a LOT of trial and error involved. Candles that burned too hot and fast or too cool and slow. I kept working at it until I had a fabulous product. I even used the tagline “World’s best soy candles” And I truly believe they were. As the company grew I became completely overwhelmed with the company. It appeared I was SUCCESSFUL. As far as society measures I was successful. I was MISERABLE. I worked seven days a week. Many days eighteen hours a day. I barely saw my sons. We ate a lot of pizza during those days on paper plates standing in between rows of candles.
CREATE A PRETTY LIFE!
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The business grew more by the day for a few reasons. •
I worked HARD.
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It was perfect timing. Soy candles were just becoming popular.
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I had a great product.
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My customer service was extraordinary. I went above and beyond for each and every order.
With all that being said. I was MISERABLE. So, I sold the company. From the day I decided to sell till to the day it sold. One week, it took one week. And it was gone. People thought I had lost my mind. How could I possibly sell such a “successful” business!?
THE BEST PROJECT YOU’LL EVER WORK ON IS
From the day I decided to sell till to the day it sold, it took one week. And it was gone. People thought I had lost my mind.
YOU
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KRISTIN SCHMIDT
Dreams can change! I will tell you how.
The business taught me so much and it served it’s purpose. It was time for it to go!
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It wasn’t my life’s dream after all.
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I rarely spent any time with my family.
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It hit the tipping point to grow the company bigger with more equipment and inventory or sell.
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I listened to my gut.
I have never for one minute regretted selling the company. It wasn’t right for me. The business taught me so much and it served it’s purpose. It was time for it to go! You may be considering selling a business, ending a relationship, quitting a job. You know in your heart the answer. Listen to it. Trust yourself. If I would have listened to people I may still own the candle company and be extremely unhappy. Listen to yourself!
CREATE A PRETTY LIFE!
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I started my soy candle company, wrote and published a book, both with no idea how to do either. I just began. Asked for help when I needed it and figured it out as I went. There is always a way to do whatever it is you want to do. I’m proof of it! •
Will you hit walls and get discouraged? Yes.
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Will you find yourself having to make decisions, all the while praying you are doing the right thing? Yes.
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Will you make mistakes? Yes
GOOD FOR YOU! In facing all of those things it means you had the courage to TRY! GO GIRL! I am cheering for you! Don’t be afraid to fail! Be afraid not to try! Feeling pumped up? Wanting to get your pretty on, but you are still unsure what it is you really want to do?
I got you!
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Asked for help when I needed it. In facing all of those things it means you had the courage to TRY!
KRISTIN SCHMIDT
Don’t be afraid to fail! Here is something else you can try. What are you crazy proud of? What do people ask you to do that you simply rock at? This has NOTHING to do with your family, children or special someone.
What are you crazy proud of? What do people ask you to do that you simply rock at?
What do people compliment you on? This is where many say “What? That? It’s nothing”! It’s because it’s so natural for you that you believe anyone can do it. Guess what. They can’t. At least not like YOU! Do you have an eye for fashion and can dress anyone to look fabulous in what it is they should be wearing? Does your banana brad get a blue ribbon every year at the county fair? Are you asked to take photos at every family gathering because your photo’s look like the ones in magazines? •
Maybe you could start a fashion consulting business or be a designer
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Start a bakery or become a pastry chef.
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Become a professional photographer.
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Take notice of what you are really good at! Be proud! It’s a part of what makes you YOU and unique!
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Are you in a rut? Is every day the same as the day before? Same route to work, same eye shadow… same same same? Until you don’t really even pay attention to your surroundings? Maybe it’s time to shake things up a bit! •
Try a new lipstick or nail polish color.
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Wear your hair up.
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Ask a new coworker to lunch.
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Listen to completely different music than you normally do.
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Prepare a new food you’ve always wanted to try.
List ten things you can do differently!
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KRISTIN SCHMIDT
Take care of you! I have been guilty of putting myself last. Making do with what I have. I have been working on this! You don’t have to spend a fortune to look cute and feel pretty. When was the last time you:
You don’t have to spend a fortune to look cute and feel pretty. You deserve to look and feel pretty.
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Bought yourself a new matching bra and panty set?
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New sleepwear.
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A new purse
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Something new to wear for parties? Or do you drag out what I call “the uniform” your funeral, wedding all around party outfit.
I wore the same dress too… EVERY Single Event for two years. My uniform. I decided I needed to look and feel pretty. Got a few outfits I loved. YOU deserve it too! As we lose our pretty we seem to start doing less and less to look and feel our best. I am guilty of this! I have gotten up, threw yoga pants on, sweatshirt and put my hair up in a pony tail. No makeup and called it – ready for the day! This became normal. I didn’t feel pretty inside or out. And it showed. I stopped painting my nails. Didn’t bother with perfume. Didn’t bother with taking care of ME.
CREATE A PRETTY LIFE!
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That went on for a long time. Until it became normal. I was unhappy. To be honest with you, I simply didn’t care. I put weight on and stopped looking in the mirror. Wore what fit, not what made me feel good. I was losing myself and it was becoming the new me. Someone I didn’t like. The lower my self esteem became, the lower I felt. Everything in my life seemed to reflect how low I really felt. They were dark days, I tell you, dark days. It got to the point when I woke up. I didn’t want to open my eyes because I didn’t want to face another day of unhappiness. This is where the sobbing on the bathroom floor became a normal part of my life. Feeling worthless, fat, ugly and worth nothing. I knew I had to do something. Anything. To claw out of that dark place. Was it easy? No. Did I have to feel pain to the point I couldn’t take it anymore. Yes.
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I finally understood the quote by Anais Nin
And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was greater than the risk it took to bloom.
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I couldn’t stay on the bathroom floor. I had to bloom.
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I started with simple things.
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I painted my nails. BRIGHT PINK
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I got up, took a shower, did my hair and makeup. Even if I wasn’t leaving the house.
It got to the point when I woke up. I didn’t want to open my eyes because I didn’t want to face another day of unhappiness.
These may not seem like big things, but at the time they were HUGE.
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KRISTIN SCHMIDT
Girl! There is LIGHT! I wanted more in my life than sadness and unhappiness. I knew the only person that could make things better for me, was ME. I am sharing all of this with you because I know how it feels to be so low. You can’t see any light at the end of the tunnel. But, girl! There is light!!! There IS! Here are a few more things you can do! TODAY to begin building a pretty life! Listen to some uplifting music! I have a playlist that I love that can change my mood Stronger – Kelly Clarkson
All About That Bass - Meghan Trainor
Shake it off – Taylor Swift
I am woman – Helen Reddy
What are some songs that you listen to that make you HAPPY? SONG
ARTIST
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PRETTY GIRL! YOU GOT THIS! Now that you’re off that bathroom floor, you’re getting jiggy with music you love, you are finally taking care of you and getting back to the woman you want to be! Let’s keep this party going , shall we! It’s the little little things that make up a pretty life. Start exactly where you are, look around you. Take notice. Take action. Without action I PROMISE you, you will be right where you are tomorrow and a year from now! That’s not where you want to be!
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Start exactly where you are, look around you. Take notice. Take action. Without action, you will be right where you are tomorrow and a year from now!
KRISTIN SCHMIDT
Let It Go Remember that thing we talked about earlier that simply comes to you so easily that you dismiss it. Take a little time to ponder that . That my pretty friend is something you can build on to find your passion. As well as the green with envy, the thing we pretend not to really care or notice. It’s time to get real with yourself! Be gentle with yourself.
When we are ready to make changes of any kind in our lives we reflect on decisions we’ve made and sometimes get upset with our choices.
When we are ready to make changes of any kind in our lives we reflect on decisions we’ve made and sometimes get upset with our choices. You made the choices you made because that’s where you were at that point in your life. It’s OK! You can’t unring a bell. Its done. Move forward. Begin today. Right now to forgive yourself for anything you feel you wish you hadn’t done. Or wish you had. You’ve carried that with you long enough, don’t you think? Let It Go. You will begin to feel lighter. I promise you that.
CREATE A PRETTY LIFE!
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Here are a few more things you can do to create a pretty life! • When was the last time you moved your body, your furniture, actually anything? • Move something! • Go for a walk. • Put the couch in a different part of your living room. Set up the coffee pot next to your bed so you can have a cup without going to the kitchen! • Look around your bedroom. Is it a sanctuary or a storage shed? • Is there laundry in piles on the floor? Is the treadmill used as a coat hanger? • Last years magazines on the night stand? • I think we can agree, none of that is sexy. • Look at your surrounding with fresh pretty eyes!
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KRISTIN SCHMIDT
Get Outside. Breathe! Girl! Get outside. Breathe. Get out of your own head. Where we all go and swirl the same thoughts over and over. Worrying and fretting. Where does that get you? Back to the same problem. It becomes a habit. A bad habit. I would say it’s time to do something different, wouldn’t you?
Think for yourself. Trust your own intuition. Another’s mind isn’t walking your journey, you are.
CREATE A PRETTY LIFE!
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Call a friend. Not text or email. Give her/him a ring. If possible make a plan to get together.
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KRISTIN SCHMIDT
Call a friend. Not text or email. Give her or him a ring. If possible make a plan to get together. Talk things out. Laugh! Come up with some solutions. Look at things from a new perspective. Then, we’re back to this. Take action. Even if it’s those tiny baby steps! I believe in you my friend, you aren’t alone. Look how far you’ve already come. Yayyyyy you! You didn’t lose yourself and your pretty in one day. Bringing it back will take a little time! I KNOW you can do it! It’s your life… Make it pretty!
Kristin Schmidt
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Create a Pretty Life IT'S YOUR LIFE... MAKE IT PRETTY