TROPIC OF UNICORN
Or, A Treatise On Old Fettercairn's Brand-New Brand
i
t’s a strange thing to witness the birth of a brand. Icons like Glenlivet,
to myth, spring from the same well there are only seven tales that we tell;
Macallan and Glenmorangie evolved over time rather than coming to the world
Overcoming the Monster.
fully formed. What would they look like if
Rags to Riches.
they did - would their organic evolution
The Quest.
over time have brought them to a
Voyage and Return.
different place than where they now lie?
Rebirth.
Colours, fonts, identity - how would they
Comedy.
differ?
Tragedy.
I am not a whisky anorak, and I never
The story of Fettercairn has elements of
will be - I like the science of it all, but
all seven. Triumph, failure, humour,
mostly I love whisky branding. You might
tragedy, and most of all, persistence. As
say that this means I am all surface no
they launch out on their own, it is time
depth; I would say that I just like stories.
for those stories to become known, and
But while I really don’t want to talk about
it’s not my job to tell them, or at least not
yeast, but I am interested in brands that
here. But I do have some random,
do. I am interested in how some whisky
incoherent thoughts as I sit here in
brands have shifted the conversation
Edinburgh Airport waiting to fly home
from the late stage development - stills,
after spending two days at the distillery.
casks, location - back to things like fermentation, yeast, grain, soil, the
This is their year zero - there have been
glimmer in a farmer’s eye. Whisky lovers
indie bottlings over the years; that line is
thirst for information about it all - why
now closed off - but the vast majority of
here, why this way, why any of this at all?
their stock went into Whyte & Mackay blends. Until now. So you have this
In whisky branding there is a lot of almost
beautiful little distillery, with cute little
ritualistic retelling of the same stories. All
warehouses full of interesting, funky, old,
great narratives, those which truly aspire
old stock. But Scotland has a lot of places
like that, so how do you say, well,
distillery with a great backstory and a
Fettercairn is different. For me, a total
unicorn as its emblem. Plenty to build on -
non-anorak, who knows very little about
and the branding draws on that. The
whisky, it has to be this:
teal-green of the oxidized copper on the still, the modern, fresh white of a brand unburdened by heritage labels, that jazz age glass, a modern font that eschews the copperplate of yore. All very slick. But I just came through travel retail and it is a cornucopia of beautiful whisky, stunning works of art before you even get the cork off - it takes a lot to catch consumers’ eye.
I’m not going to go into it here as I’m
Seeing a scotch whisky brand coming to
doing a piece for print, but that yoke is
market with so much great history and
the one thing I desperately wanted to see
still fretting that it may not be enough is
when I was invited. What a curiosity -
incredible when you consider Irish whiskey
what madness was it that drove them to
and where it is going to be in 10, 20, 50
do it? But it is key to their identity now -
years from now.
this insane fountain of cold burn water
Every trip to Caledonia teaches me more
makes this highland malt a decidedly
about where we need to be heading, and
fruity affair, specifically tropical fruits; I
it’s not about where we should be in five
tried a 1964 that was like a glass of fresh
or ten years time, but in 50 or 100.
squeezed papaya, mango, pineapple, just
Anyone interested in whisky branding,
this juicy wildness that had somehow
here, there, or anywhere, should visit
retained that spirit identity despite a
some Scottish distilleries and see how
relative eternity in wood. So you have
they do it. We have much to learn.
this crazed steampunk addition to the
But in the meantime, here are a million
stills, a fruity highland malt, a pretty
photos.
Some of us look for the Way in opium and so in God, some of us in whisky and some in lov is all the same Way and it leads nowhither.
- W. Somerset Mau
The Paint
ome ve. It
ugham,
ted Veil
