BOLD Favor Magazine December 2014 by BOLD Favor

DECEMBER 2014

F AV O R

MARIO COBIAN

Lighting up minds, futures & relationships

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THE FUTURE FAVORS THE BOLD! 1

COVER: LIGHT ‘EM UP

AT THE INSTERSECTION OF PARENTS & TEACHERS

BEHIND THE LENS

In this Issue

DINNER FOR DIVAS

EBONY HILLSMAN

BREAKING THE CHAINS OF HUMAN TRAFFICKING

DAVID & MYESHA GOOD

STRATEGIES FOR ACADEMIC SUCCESS

JOSEPH VELASQUEZ

PATTI BEHEN

THE NEXT GENERATION

FULL COURT MEN

JOSEPH VELASQUEZ

19 20

CONNECTING

ALBERTA LAMPKINS

CARIBBEAN GIRLS ROCK! DORNA WERDELIN

HOLIDAY GRIEF

TANISHA MACKIN

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WHO DO YOU TALK TO? WILLIAM R. COOK

THE POWER OF INTIMACY

DIONNE LACKEY & ELIZABETH ST. JOHN-HALL

31 RUNNING

SEAM DREAMS

BOLD ARTIST: NEZ EROK

LIFE BEFORE LIFE

PAUL GRIEVES

CUTTING TO THE CHASE

JUNG KANG

COLD WEATHER TRENDS

KEELIA & TAMRA ASBURY

FALL MAKEUP TRENDS

CHRISTELSIE JOHNSON

THE LEADING LADY LEGACY

LYNITA MITCHELLBLACKWELL

IN UNISON

SANDY CHERNOFF

TWIN AMBITION

EBONY HILLSMAN

ORANGE IS NOT THE NEW GREEN

SONJI WILLINGHAM

BOLDFAVOR MAGAZINE EDITOR-IN-CHIEF MANAGING EDITOR CREATIVE DIRECTOR VIDEOGRAPHER PHOTOGRAPHER MAKEUP ARTIST HAIRSTYLIST

LYNITA MITCHELL-BLACKWELL EBONY HILLSMAN JODECI RICHARDS TYRA BREAUX TANYA PATTERSON ELIZABETH ST. JOHN-HALL DEYONNA MOSS

DECEMBER2014 MAGAZINE CONTRIBUTORS LYNITA MITCHELL-BLACKWELL EBONY HILLSMAN KEELIA ASBURY TAMRA ASBURY PATTI BEHEN SANDY CHERNOFF WILLIAM R. CO OK

B v

FAYE A. FIELDS CONNIE FRANKLIN DAVID GO OD MYESHA GO OD PAUL S. GRIEVE CHRISTELSIE JOHNSON JUNG KANG

DIONNE LACKEY ALBERTA LAMPKINS TANYA PATTERSON ELIZABETH ST. JOHN-HALL DORNA WERDELIN SONJI WILLINGHAM

Letter from the Editor

he power of relationships cannot be overstated. Having someone with whom to share victories and struggles, confide hopes and fears, and encourage through loss and celebrate joy is an amazing experience. But it has to be the right “somebody” as my mother used to say. Meaningful, fulfilling relationships are built on trust, respect, and mutuality. Mutuality is coequality, commonality, and reciprocity. Such state of equality is necessary in personal and professional relationships if they are to be sustainable. Our third issue of BOLD Favor Magazine is focused on Mutually Beneficial Relationships. Our December cover is Mario Cobian. Mario discusses the diversity and challenge of his experiences as a Latino marketing executive and entrepreneur, harnessing the power of his relationships to found Leadership, Innovation, Transformation (LIT) College Tour, a non-profit that brings together world-class business leaders and collegiate students from underrepresented groups for training, mentorship, and leadership development. We also examine the importance of relationships in building a business from the ground up with Celebrated Photographer & Speaker Ross Oscar Knight; creating international non-profit Focal Point Global to benefit underserved youth in developing nations with twin activists Hassanatu Blake and Hussainatu Blake Mumford; and using a devastatingly violent teenage relationship as a catalyst for founding the Dining for Divas domestic violence survivor support group. We also explore the most important relationship—the relationship with Self—through the “Leading Lady Legacy”, the new Leading Through Living Community empowerment conference and book by the same name as a call to action to stop being “mini-me’s” of others, and live the big YOU. All of the above movements required the mutual support and commonality of family, friends, and business and community associates to become realities. We are all connected and interrelated, no matter where we live, what we do, or how we choose to serve the world. It is

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imperative that we utilize our passion to achieve our purpose so that we may be powerful change agents in the world. Our relationships with others help us to fully actualize this aspiration. Our network of supporters, resource providers, cheerleaders, and friends champion us to do so. It was the power of relationships that founded this magazine, and continues to take it to new heights. It gives me great pleasure to welcome our new Creative Director, Jodeci Richards. The new layout of our magazine, the website, and new logo are all her creations. Jodeci was referred to us by staff writer Dorna Werdelin—one of the first people to champion our cause (and an incredible personal friend). It is the power of a friendship that started with a simple “Hello” in an elevator that lead to the Platinum sponsorship of the Leading Through Living Community and all of its programs by Ms. Sonji Willingham of Premier Transitional Services, Inc. And it is the power of my family and friends that continue to sustain me through the incredible unknown of all that LTLC is doing—fun yet terrifying at the same time! Enjoy this issue that love brought together. Happy holidays and peace unto you for the New Year. Be BOLD and Fearless!

Lynita Mitchell-Blackwell Lynita Mitchell-Blackwell Esq. & CPA Founder & Editor-in-Chief

Letter from the Managing Editor The term family has evolved to encompass a family of one, blended families, traditional families, and modern families. I am a Family of One—a single lady who has taken time to consider the balance of life, love and priorities that impact relationships of all kinds. This time has created for me a greater appreciation of all that goes into building all of the relationships that create a family. While I don’t have it all figured out, I believe I have learned 3 important things that are required to build relationships that will empower, support, and embolden you through life’s challenges: 1. Allow yourself to be vulnerable. Being vulnerable will not kill you. It is hard to always bring my best self to every situation because putting on a “show” is exhausting. Showing vulnerability is the same as opening a bulletproof vest. Any person aiming to reach any soft spots is almost sure to hit a vital organ. And some people will take the shot— and your pride will sting at every hit. But as my warm circle evolves and I surround myself with better people, I am learning that the right

people will not take the shot. Rather, they will open their vests and be vulnerable with me. And we can stop the exhausting show and be authentic. 2. Authenticity is everything. “Being real” begins with honesty—honesty with one’s self and with others. Finding the authenticity within is an incredibly liberating experience, and it allows one to experience the Greatest Love of All—self-love. 3. Love creates love. Love others like you want to be loved. It is not a complicated concept. You deserve the best and so it stands that you extend the best to others. Some people will not return the gesture; that is okay—move on and love them at a distance until they “get it together.” Self-love is a life-long process, and some of us get there long before others. Enjoy this issue of BOLD Favor. I hope you find the courage to be vulnerable, authentic and loving to receive the loving relationships you deserve.

Ebony Hillsman Ebony Hillsman Managing Editor

HUMAN DIGNITY

inner for ivas

even different times. Seven different times fighting fears of certain violence, anxiety for the safety of children and loved ones, imminent poverty and homelessness. Research has shown that it takes an average of seven times before a person leaves a domestic violence situation. Growing up, Alma G. Davis witnessed violence against her mother many times. By the age of 14 she was experiencing violence first hand. “By the time I was 14, I had my first pair of black eyes from my 14-year-old boyfriend. And I learned that this was not a functional way to deal with issues.” Our motto is that we educate, empower and celebrate women and girls who are victims of violent crime acts.

Divas is a multi-city, red-carpet gala honoring and uplifting survivors of domestic violence. Sponsored by community donations and volunteers from local women’s shelters, Dinner for Divas whisks women and girls (Divas) away for a glamorous makeover including spa treatments, formal evening attire and a five-star dinner. While fun and exciting, the purpose of the event is never far from the founder’s mind, “A part of being a survivor goes back to this: if I can show you who you are, your beauty, your worth; then I can teach you that domestic violence doesn’t match your value or your worth. “ At the time Ms. Davis sat down with BOLD Favor Magazine, domestic violence was at the forefront of the country’s conscience after the videotaped assault of the wife of a football player that became viral and was played in every news media outlet. Ms. Davis weighed in on how the impact of this event: “I think social media has opened up people’s interest and education to help them understand that mindset. Before anyone speaks on any subject the hash tag gives people an understanding. They think you can just walk away. They have no idea what it takes to get out of the situation. To encourage others we started a hash tag called

Beyond awareness, beyond education, there is empathy and empowerment. — Alma G. Davis

As an adult, Ms. Davis saw low or no self esteem as the foundational issue for both victims and perpetrators of violence. Launching the Alma G. Davis Foundation in 2009, Ms. Davis aims to rebuild the esteem that leaves thousands of women trapped in the fear of domestic violence. “Our motto is that we educate, empower and celebrate women and girls who are victims of violent crime acts.” The foundation’s signature event, Dinner for

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An evening with Alma Davis, champioon of domestic violence awareness.

• 1 in 4 women will experience domestic violence during her lifetime. • Women experience more than 4 million physical assaults and rapes because of their partners, and men are victims of nearly 3 million physical assaults. • 1/2 of all homeless women and children in the U.S. are fleeing from domestic violence.

#IAmASurivor and self affirmations such as ‘I am beautiful’ and ‘no one can tell me different’.” Moving forward with the development and growth of the organiztation, Ms. Davis plans to expand the mission to Educate, Empower and Celebrate with a series of ‘Empowerment Lunches’ for women and girls from shelters across the nation. To learn more about the organization and giving back, visit dinnerfordivas.org. n Ebony Hillsman

Breaking the chains of human trafficking National Geographic calls it 21st Century slavery. But make no mistake—human trafficking has enslaved more people than the Trans-Atlantic slave trade, and that lasted for more than four centuries.

uman trafficking is an unruly global issue that needs to be addressed and combated. As defined using literature written by the U.S. government and antislavery.org, it’s the involuntary subjection (“recruitment, harboring, transportation, provision, or obtaining”) of a person to prostitution, labor, begging, criminality, marriage, peonage, and even organ removal through force, fraud or coercion. This is a horrendous $150 billion worldwide industry supported by the victimization of an estimated 20.9 million people, according to the International Labor Organization. Of the annual $32 billion profit it turns (third largest behind illegal drug and arms trafficking), $15.5 billion is made in industrialized countries like the U.S. And you can help fight it. Because trafficking is not a discriminatory industry. Someone you know could be just as easily targeted as a person who already has been. Of those 20.9 million victims, 5.5 million are children and 55% are women and girls, and about 44% are forced to cross international borders. These are people who have been lured by false promises of a lucrative job, stability, education, or a loving relationship. They come from diverse ethnic

and socio-economic backgrounds, varied levels of education, and may be documented or undocumented. And while there is no specific “type” of person who is targeted, some are more susceptible than most. Like runaways and homeless youth; victims of domestic violence, sexual assault, war or conflict, or social discrimination; or foreign nationals who’ve become indebted to the labor recruiters and traffickers that they’ve paid for a better life. This doesn’t happen in some far away land, but right where you live. From the shores of Los Angeles to those of Tokyo and everywhere in between—think Atlanta, London, Moscow, Sao Paolo, Somalia, and Bangladesh amongst other places— global traffickers manipulate and trap victims in horrific situations every day. Large sporting events like the Super Bowl, World Series, FIFA World Cup, and Olympics are major hubs for human trafficking. Just the week before this year’s Super Bowl, the FBI rescued 16 young people subjected to child sex trafficking in New Jersey, and arrested over 45 “pimps and their associates” connected to the ring.

You can do something about this. You can spot a case of human trafficking using the following signs provided by the National Human Trafficking Resource Center.

Tips for identifying victims of human trafficking In seemingly ordinary working and living conditions, look for a person who: •

Is not free to leave or come and go as he/she wishes and is not allowed breaks, or suffers under other unusual work restrictions

•

Appears under 18 and is offering sex for money

•

Is unpaid, paid very little, or paid only through tips

•

Works excessively long and/or unusual hours

•

Is fearful, anxious, depressed, submissive, tense, or nervous/ paranoid, especially after mentioning law enforcement

•

Appears malnourished

•

Shows signs of physical and/or sexual abuse, physical restraint, confinement, or torture

•

Has few or no personal possessions and does not control of his/her own money, financial records, bank account, or identification (ID or passport)

•

Is not allowed or able to speak for themselves (a third party may insist on being present and/or translating)

•

Claims to be just visiting, but can’t clarify where he/she is staying

•

Has no knowledge regarding whereabouts, what city he/she is in, and/or sense of time

•

Has numerous inconsistencies in his/ her story

Visit traffickingresourcecenter.org for a full list of tips. And to request help or report suspected human trafficking, call the National Human Trafficking Resource Center hotline at 1-888-373-7888. Or text INFO or HELP to us at: BeFree (233733). We all have the power to help fight human trafficking. Will you? n David & Myesha Good

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STRATEGIES

ACADEMI

SUCCES As an immigrant from Mexico, I know the importance of competent academic coaching, healthy mentorship and sustained role-model guidance.

S FOR

MIC

am bilingual, bi-cultural, and attended a public high school (Pierce High School) in Arbuckle, a small agricultural community in Northern California. In spite of growing up in a humble migrant farm-worker family, I found a way to attend and succeed at the University of Southern California and the University of California, Los Angeles School of Law. After a fulfilling and diverse career in university administration, public school teaching, business consulting and practicing law, I made the decision to exclusively dedicate the rest of my life to improving the academic success of Latino youth--in recognition of and as a response to the enormously devastating impact of the Latino Education Gap. That is why I founded OjoOido.com PBC, a Delaware Public Benefit Corporation. OjoOido is a Latino e-learning website that delivers a blended multimedia curriculum to develop core study habits and skills for Latino youth. Latino youth and parents receive sustained coaching and training on how to competently negotiate the public school system. OjoOido’s innovative approach is targeted, relevant, and transformative. One of the most powerful ways to reduce the Latino high school dropout rate, increase college attendance and improve college graduation rates, is by targeting a root problem: the minimal or complete absence of academic study strategies for the vast majority of Latino youth. OjoOido addresses this failure to provide the Latino student population access to comprehensive and culturally relevant technical academic skills coaching and training. The first strategy of academic achievement is to recognize that you are responsible for your own learning. Most Latino students want to be part of a different and better world, but often they do not know how. Study strategies are rarely taught, or for that matter discussed by teachers, especially at the middle school and high school level. Teachers must be

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content driven and normally expect students to devise their own approach to negotiating the academic workload or depend on parents for this direction. OjoOido inculcates what it means to be an independent learner. By the teaching and implementation of study strategies, OjoOido trains Latino students to succeed far beyond what they currently perceive is possible and provides Latino parents the support needed to proactively prepare their children to become engaged and competitive public school students. The current OjoOido Latino Role Models--Lou Gonzales, Mario Olivares, Anthony Munoz, Edwin Aguilar, Lindsey Olivares--and I know first hand what is required for Latino youth to become competent public school students. Our background mirrors that of an overwhelmingly high percentage of Latino students in the United States. We know the obstacles that our Latino youth face in successfully negotiating the public school system. Therefore, we have used our collective practical wisdom, expertise, creativity and impassioned zeal to create a blended multimedia student development pedagogy that Latino serving institutions and its administrators, teachers, parents, and most importantly, its students can utilize to improve educational attainment. All students can – and will succeed – with the opportunity to learn and grow; regardless of cultural or socio-economic obstacles that may stand in their way. Throughout our lives we have demonstrated a record of problem solving, creating, developing and executing strategic planning to successfully achieve our goals. Our life-long passionate interest in and involvement in educational programs designed to strengthen under-resourced Latino students’ ability to succeed in challenging academic environments has lead us to create OjoOido; a sustainable, replicable and scalable Latino e-learning solution--by Latinos, for Latinos. n Joseph Velasquez, Founder of OjoOido.com

BRANDING BRANDING BRANDING BRANDING

SOCIAL SOCIALMEDIA MEDIA SOCIAL SOCIALMEDIA MEDIA

PUBLIC PUBLICRELATIONS RELATIONS PUBLIC PUBLICRELATIONS RELATIONS

ADVERTISING ADVERTISING ADVERTISING ADVERTISING

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THE

NEXT Gen W

ith science, technology, engineering and math (STEM) occupations becoming more important to our growth as a nation, it’s in the national interest to break down the barriers for Latinos. According to the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics, in the United States, employment in STEM occupations is projected to grow nearly two times faster than the average for all occupations in the next few years. It’s estimated that tech companies will have in the range of 430,000 STEM job openings. America’s Latino community is a fast growing one. Passel, Cohn and Lopez noted in 2011 that “Latino population growth between 2000 and 2010 accounted for more than half of the nation’s population growth.” And the longer we ignore them as resources for the fastest growing industries, we are doing both Latinos and the STEM industry a disservice. Developing the core academic habits and skills required to successfully develop the next generation of Latino talent for STEM positions is a prerequisite in creating a reliable and skilled workforce to fill those positions. As a Latino in a STEM industry, I’ve seen and understood firsthand the importance of higher education for underserved communities. To effectively encourage greater participation and access in STEM it’s imperative that all Latino students at least understand basic critical thinking and strategic planning. The current absence of focused instruction on these topics is the real crux of the problem Latino students face. A significantly larger number of Latino students will be attracted to the STEM occupations if they are introduced to a problem solving approach that empowers them across all fields of study. To have a measurable impact in recruiting

and adequately preparing them to succeed in STEM occupations it’s not only important to inspire passion for STEM occupations, but it’s also important that they see the necessity of and apply critical thinking and strategic planning. Latino students must make time to reflect before making decisions required to successfully negotiate a STEM education and career. Critical thinkers and strategic

430 000 The estimated number of STEM job openings that tech companies will have.

planners take the time to reflect and consider relationships between ideas, plans, and people, which others fail to see. Latino students must be introduced to the intellectual “tools” that critical thinkers use to improve their thinking. Educators must do a better job of communicating to Latino students the applicability of the important qualities of a critical thinker. Critical thinkers do not take their thinking for granted. Critical thinkers notice their thinking, reflect on it and then act upon it. Critical thinkers are highly

purposeful; their actions are not reactive, but rather reflective. Critical thinkers create clear goals and priorities before taking action and continually measure their actions to insure that their actions align with their goals. Critical thinkers are strategic planners. Teaching Latino students that they have the capability to think strategically doesn’t mean making decisions that affect changing life circumstances beyond their control. It requires only that they analyze small and large decisions in the context of their broader goals. Latino students’ cultural perspectives need a “reboot” as it pertains to education generally and STEM specifically. Latino students view people in the STEM field differently than Anglos. A major challenge with combatting existing stereotypes within the Latino community regarding STEM occupations is to put forth more Latino role models to change the current thinking. As all competent and seasoned educators know, both the affective and cognitive domains must be attended to. If thinking is unrealistic, it will lead to many disappointments. If thinking is unduly pessimistic, it will close the door to many opportunities an individual should properly consider and pursue. The current student development pedagogy in Latino-serving public middle schools and high schools, all too pervasively, fail in inculcating the habit of routine self-evaluation of one’s own thinking to determine its strengths and weaknesses. If Latino students learn that the disciplined practice of evaluating one’s thinking is a habit one must learn then they will be empowered to be more deliberate in their thoughts and actions. n Joseph Velasquez, Founder of OjoOido.com

neration

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Behind the lens.

With Ross Oscar Knight

MEANINGFUL RELATIONSHIPS

oss Oscar Knight knows the power of relationships. It was his outstanding relationship skills that enabled him to transform from a successful careerist in Corporate America to world-renowned photographer and speaker. “Relationships are everything,” he stated emphatically. “They account for over 90% of my business.” It’s hard to believe that Ross Oscar Knight stuttered as a child. His easy smile and warm manner radiate power and confidence. Yet he readily shares that it was his passion for photography and storytelling that eradicated his speech impediment. A speech therapist recommended that Ross take pictures and use them to capture the world as he saw it, and tell stories based on those images. When he focused on the picture during his oral story, the stutter disappeared. And so Ross’ love of digital storytelling began.

MY PURPOSE IS TO BRING OUT THE BEST IN PEOPLE.

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Ross took pictures of everything and everyone. When looking through old photographs, he is rarely seen in them because he is the one behind the camera. However, he shared that he would not have it any other way—even today. “I enjoy connecting with people. My purpose is to bring the best out of them. Photography is my vehicle to do that.” Although Ross’ love of photography endured through high school, his sense of practicality led him to major in engineering and physics in college. Thanks to hard work and a full scholarship from NASA, he earned his degree in electrical engineering, and went on to work in various roles with Southern Company including, human resources, marketing, land acquisitions and supplier developzment (small business). Ross enjoyed the diversity of working with different people, and learning new skills. He even became a Six Sigma Black Belt.But his passion forever remained with the camera. The building in which his office and studio now stand, was first his favorite shooting location. Before the renovations, the Studioplex was largely abandoned but had a beautiful porch with excellent lighting. Ross would invite clients to meet him at the porch, arriving early to clean it and prepare it for the shoot. So when the building was purchased and renovated, Ross was determined he would

that was perfect for displaying his art and hosting events. “It was like coming home,” he said, a small smile on his face. In coming to understand how Ross went from a fast track career at one of the most stable and profitable companies today to taking the leap into entrepreneurship, he explained that he went through a period of deep reflection to determine what was next in his life. He began reading, specifically citing A Purpose Driven Life (by Rick Warren); he interviewed colleagues and potential mentors in his life to determine their definition of success; he wrote a life plan with “serious goals” that were enumerated by age and accomplishment; and through it all he prayed. 2006 was a defining year: Ross was accepted into three graduate schools and his company offered him a huge promotion. At the same time, his part-time photography business had blossomed to the point that he had run out of vacation days to complete shooting assignments. So with a year of savings and year-end bonus, Ross took the BOLD leap: he left his safe and comfortable job and struck out on his own. His faith and planning paid off. Ross’ work has appeared in magazines, journals, and TV shows the world over, including the Oprah Winfrey book club and website.

Are you intrigued? To learn more about Ross Oscar Knight, visit rossoscarknight.com

In all his success, Ross maintained his relationships cultivated while in the utility industry, and largely credits those to his entry into corporate assignments. Not only does he continue to network in the utility arena, he is also fortunate to have a bevy of fortune 500 clients as well. Ross is grateful for his success, and enjoys helping up-and-coming photographers. He has developed relationships that have led to a solid referral base where he sends smaller and niche projects to his contacts, and they send him the larger ones. In working within this group, the idea to facilitate workshops and write a book on photography came to be. “It started out as a book of tips,” he shared, “but developed into one to two-day workshops.”

have a place in its new history. Ross worked tirelessly to develop relationships with tenants of Studioplex and helped other businesses in the complex by shooting their events. In 2010 he acquired a courtyard space

When asked how he stays sharp and continues to grow, Ross’ response was surprising. There were the expected answers: a mentor ( a former VP who provides “gut checks” to ensure there is always a plan in play). A group of colleagues with

I’LL CONTINUE COLLECTING STORIES & EXPLORING WORLD CULTURES. whom he affiliated—it is a loosely formed mastermind group that meets quarterly to discuss and collaborate. But the unexpected? A brand therapist. This person encourages Ross to redevelop his image to encompass all he wanted to be—right now. The son and grandson of pastors, Ross believes in writing the plan and speaking it into existence. “I’m lucky. If I write it down, it seems to happen,” he said. But he had not thought about writing something prior to it happening. And yet he did. He changed his website to include “Author” one year before it came to be. He shared the secret: when you project your future aspirations onto others, “people will eventually start to see you as that and you will too.” So what’s next for Ross Oscar Knight? “More international exploration,” he stated. He wants to continue collecting stories and exploring cultures around the world. His camera is his passport. Knight believes he has been called to help non-profits increase their visibility through striking imagery. This goes hand-in-hand with his spirit of philanthropy, as Ross has completed mission trips to Haiti, Hondourus, and Burundi.Ross is also codirector of the Beautiful in Every Shade global empowerment campaign. It recognizes and affirms the beauty in all people despite race and social norms. He, along with Carlton Mackey, recently won a grant to fund a project called, Typical American Families. To add to all of the travel, Knight has a goal to write a children’s book dedicated to his daughter. “She is my inspiration,” he remarked. One thing is for sure; this bold visionary has a bright future ahead of him and is clearly poised to make his dreams come true. n Lynita Mitchell-Blackwell

CONNECTING IN An ever CONNECTED WORLD

The importance of real social interaction in a world run by social networks.

reating valuable social networking relationships is significant. Smart technology has become a part of our daily lives and our increasingly mobile world has given rise to social networks. Google, Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter, Instagram and emerging social media have changed the way people and businesses interact. We’re now an interconnected world—with one touch, we can reach humankind across the globe. Information about who we are, the mission and goals of our business, our brand and products are in the grasp of the world. The ways we communicate and cooperate with each other, from customers and business associates to our friends and family, has been reshaped. And more change is inevitable; new technologies and instantaneous information will differ even more by 2020. And though, as we move deeper into the 21st century and a “smarter” world, it begs the question: will the need for physical social interaction evaporate? Talking to people, making connections and developing a rapport with individuals is not a dying concept. It is, in fact, important. Sharing knowledge, experience, personal struggles, and resources is indispensable, as is having ambassadors to help promote you. Getting to know the right people who can help you reach your goal and attract the right partnerships cannot be totally replaced by a “smart” world. We trust the things we can hear, see, touch and feel. We trust our instincts and when we meet someone face-to-face, our opinions change based on what we observe about that person. Intelligent data and analytical computing is a great asset, but the human brain and the human heart are far more advanced than any smart device. Reading about Oprah Winfrey’s success, watching her television shows and following her on Twitter is quite different from actually meeting Oprah, talking to Oprah, sharing thoughts, ideas and bonding with Oprah. Invitations to the right events in our lives and exposure to the right people help increase the circle of influence in our business and personal dealings. Getting to know and understand other people’s perspectives help to foster new ideas, new insights and new wisdom. The right exposure is invaluable. Sure, we can send out a thousand different tweets and post everyday on Facebook and we may find some success in doing so. But the right information in the hands of the right person who has met you, heard your pitch or studied the way you carry yourself may make a world of difference. There is importance in being physically social. We shouldn’t let a “smart” world deter us from getting out and meeting new prospects, encouraging others, sharing thoughts, promoting ideas, networking and making personal connections. We are already equipped with the most valuable tools we need: our beautiful minds and our hearts. Let’s enrich each other by taking advantage of new age technology, but never letting go of our humanity. n Alberta Lampkins

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CA I B EA G I LS OC 20

R B N R R K

Boldly building bridges to relationships across the Caribbean.

t’s amazing when women straddle boundaries to celebrate each other. And Caribbean Girls Rock! is blazing the way. In 2013, colorful tank tops exclaiming “Caribbean Girls Rock!” started popping up on Facebook feeds. Excited searches would reveal fellow Virgin Islanders and friends, Patreece DeChabert and Jenee James, as the smarts behind the shirts. Now the tanks are a viral hit, appearing in plenty of “selfies” and connecting women with similar experiences and cultures—who would otherwise overlook each other because of differing locales— across the Caribbean Diaspora. Bold Favor recently sat down with Patreece and Jenee to hear about the inspiration behind CGR and its success.

unique and living away from home has shown me how we see things so positively and differently. We weren’t raised with the same struggles. Coming from an island paradise, we are so blessed to have been surrounded by beauty and rich culture! It’s the food, music, art, people. I love my Trini Soca, my DA Zouk, my VI calypso and reggae. JJ: I’m most proud about being able to share my culture with my daughters while accomplishing my professional goals. I’ve always been grateful for my island upbringing which has a lot to do with who I am as a person. Artists like Allison Hinds are rocking your beautiful CGR shirts. How does it feel seeing your tops worn proudly across the world?

BFM: What was the motivation behind CGR? PD: I love world culture and I’m especially fond of my heritage and Caribbean roots. Caribbean Girls Rock was started to pay tribute to all of the amazing Caribbean women who are an inspiration to all and to encourage young girls by giving them a place to explore success. I founded CGR and pulled in my friend Jenee on the journey beginning with various social media, a website, blog and mini docs. CGR is an outlet to gather, develop and promote the diverse culture, talent and experiences of Caribbean ladies.

We founded Caribbean Girls Rock! as an outlet to gather, develop and promote the diverse culture, talent and experiences of Caribbean women.

JJ: We both have backgrounds in Television and felt that we needed to create something that represented us. We’re both women from the Caribbean so it was only right that we ended up with Caribbean Girls Rock!. What makes you most proud about being a Caribbean Girl? PD: I’m proud of our culture. We are truly

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PD: Thank you! It is a good feeling to see people respond positively and wear them proudly. My dad is an artist and t-shirt man and he designed so many over the years that did so well. We recognize the interest in the shirts so we have more styles that we will introduce over the seasons. But, the shirts are just 1/10th of CGR... JJ: I’m always excited to see someone wearing a CGR top. It can be surreal at times seeing the pictures and positive feedback.

PD: Just like “Woman to Woman” that I used to produce for TV2 in the VI, we share stories that inspire, encourage and motivate. At CGR, we are specifically dedicated to females of all ages: little girls, young ladies, mature women.

ONTINUED FROM PAGE 21 Many times Caribbean women from different islands or countries may be silo-ed into their respective cultures. How is CGR bridging the gap to connect a common sense of culture and sisterhood?

JJ: It’s always good to work with someone who has a positive outlook while accomplishing their goals and dreams. We’ve been lucky to feature women who are kind, talented, and genuinely dedicated to their crafts.

PD: You’re right and that’s the point. It’s totally cool to rep our islands. For me, it’s St. Thomas, for Jenee, it’s St. Croix. Or we say VI...#vinice. But I have roots in Trinidad (which is already very culturally diverse) and Dominica. So I’ve always been a Caribbean girl, not just a St. Thomian. JJ: CGR works on bridging the gap by exposing our followers to all things Caribbean. We want to make sure that the focus is on the Caribbean woman and not necessarily the island she represents. We know that we have a unique audience and it’s up to us to continue to highlight and promote the accomplishments of all Caribbean women.

What’s in CGR’s future? PD: More shirts, products, stories, and events. Also, collaboration with our peers: Vivid Streaming, USVI Ambassadors, and more. Founder Patreece DeChabert and her daughter meeting fellow rockin’ Caribbean girl, Rihanna.

You’ve featured fabulous Caribbean Girls that Rock, like designer Kristen C. Frazer, from Tortola, BVI, whose designs have been worn by Beyoncé and Blue Ivy. What are some of the qualities that you look for in your features?

JJ: We’re working on a few new projects. And for sure we will be rolling out more content on our blog: www.caribbeangirlsrock.com Your reach is amazing in such a short period of time. I believe your evolution is inevitable and am excited to bear witness to what the future holds for CGR! n Dorna Werdelin

Giving you what God wants you to have ”Simply the Best” Handmade jewelry creations from leather, fabric, wood, coconut wood,beads and more!

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MEANINGFUL RELATIONSHIPS

Grieving during the holidays How to get through a joyous time after a devastating loss.

or most, the holidays are the best time of the year. But that isn’t so for those grieving a loss. Grief turns a time usually filled with family, friends, food, laughter and love into a series of unbearable moments. Moments they want to crawl and hide from. Because holidays just aren’t the same anymore. But not everyone can avoid the inevitable; many must tend to families and everyday life. I was one of them. When my husband passed, Thanksgiving and Christmas were right around the corner and I was in pain. After spending every holiday together for the past 10 years, it was going to be different and difficult. Especially because it was my daughter’s first holiday season. To know that my daughter would never be able to celebrate with her father was heartbreaking. Seeing happy families with both parents even once spurred a breakdown in the middle of holiday shopping. But, in the end, I made it through the holidays—and you can, too—by following these steps: 1. Remind yourself that this year is different. It’s hard to face, but a reminder is a way to accept that you and your family can move forward despite the big change and hardship. For example, though my aunt—who was the life of our Thanksgiving dinners—had passed,

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we didn’t shy away and still enjoyed ourselves. 2. Surround yourself with friends and family. Don’t spend the holidays alone. This will be a solemn time, so being around friends and family may ease your pain. The year my husband died, I spent Thanksgiving and Christmas with family. Although I was sad at times, being with them helped me charish my holidays a little more.

5. Take care of yourself. This may sound selfish, but it’s not! You’re grieving and need the time to do so. The time to cry or scream or yell. So if cooking the turkey or hosting Christmas is overwhelming, ask family to sub in and focus on yourself. You can even forego the holidays altogether and stay home with a book. The important part is that you take care of yourself.

3. Continue and/or make new traditions. Holiday traditions are important to families. And continuing them can help keep the memories of our loved ones vibrant. My husband would make us wear brand new pajamas on Christmas Eve, musing that Santa shouldn’t see us in old PJs. And I continue that tradition to this day. Also, don’t be afraid to start new traditions. Maybe combine them with the old. It’s a way to show that you can get past the pain.

6. Do something in remembrance. It’s a blessing to be able to honor your loved one during the holidays. You can do things like light a candle or hang an ornament or stocking with their name on it. One year for my children, I had keepsakes made with an engraved message from their father. The kids loved this little something to remember their father on the holidays.

4. It’s OK to feel both sadness and joy. It’s natural to mourn a loss. And it’s natural to embrace joy, especially during the holidays. You may feel guilty, but your loved one wouldn’t want you to be miserable around the most joyous time of the year. Sure, there were times when I needed to step away and cry. But I regrouped and joined my family. And you can do the same.

Holidays are tough when you’ve lost someone. Mourning isn’t easy and you will grieve emotionally, physically and mentally. But remember that it’s OK for you not to take on your normal holiday duties. It’s OK to let others take care of you. It’s OK to start new traditions. Your loved ones would’ve wanted you to be happy—to spend time with your family and smile. It may be hard, but you are not alone. Happy Holidays to everyone. Please cherish and enjoy your families. n Tanisha D. Mackin

Who do you listen t

On the importance of trusting your relationship to the most qualified people. 24

MEANINGFUL RELATIONSHIPS

How willing are you to trust just anyone’s judgment regarding your relationship?

to?

I’d venture to say that, generally, couples don’t seek professional or even beneficial advice regarding their relationships. Instead, they are frequently inclined to depend on the knowledge—or lack thereof—provided by those in their inner circle. They seek advice regardless of their advisor’s own relationship status, which may be detrimental. Who you listen to is a significant ideology that is habitually overlooked. Failure to properly evaluate the information you receive could become your relationship’s biggest obstacle. The information you acknowledge could be the very reason your relationship either flourishes or wilts. Not recognizing the importance of what and who you listen to could potentially dissolve your relationship simply because you’ve chosen to accept and apply impractical information to your situation.

’ve heard several talk show personalities say or suggest that nowadays, when it comes to relationships, couples could benefit from consulting with a “Relationship Expert.” Since hearing those sentiments, I’ve wondered: Are relationship experts really the destination for most couples with relationship questions?

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Now, to be both clear and fair, plenty of nonprofessionals have valid points. Sometimes all we need is a third party to refocus our vision. And if that third party is a friend, perhaps their own experiences are informing their advice. Those experiences are important and shouldn’t be overlooked. But professionals should provide something beyond a third party sounding board: unbiased expertise backed by training and education. (If someone is claiming to be a professional, but is lacking credentials, reconsider your allegiance. And always, always do your research, even if they do have a degree or certificate. The Better Business Bureau is a good place to start.) But the driving point here is to consider a professional in your decision making. Sure,

friends are great sounding boards, but where is their credibility beyond experience? It’s hard to trust financial advice from a trusted yet broke friend. It’s hard to take seriously a smoker who lectures you about health, right? Even if they are rebuilding their financial portfolio or are on the verge of quitting, respectively. Similarly, taking advice from a single friend or one in a less-than-great relationship seems inadvisable. But we don’t all take our own advice, professionals included, and sometimes we give it as a way to warn others of our own transgressions. But still, ask yourself: How willing are you to trust just anyone’s judgment regarding your relationship? So who should you go to and how should you determine this? Well, consider credibility and properly evaluate the information you receive. Understand the source by determining who and where the information is coming from. Is that one friend who’s leaving a trail of flings the best to go to for long-term relationship advice? Is the acquaintance in the middle of a messy, infidelity-riddled divorce the best for advice on how to keep a marriage together? Probably not. (But don’t devalue the lessons they learn and want to share!) And so professional consultation/interference may be necessary. If we go straight to professionals for “serious” matters, like our finances and health, why shouldn’t we do the same for our relationship questions? Unless, of course, your relationship isn’t that serious. n William Randolph Cook

at the intersection of

parents &

Teachers

here was once a time when the relationship between African American parents and schools was one of cooperation and mutual trust. Prior to desegregation mandated by Brown v. Board of Education of Topeka, parents and teachers were inextricably bound by a common interest: the children. According to Cheryl Fields-Smith’s journal article, “African American Parents before and after Brown,” parents gave schools and teachers carte blanche license to educate their children. Parental involvement and support was both direct and indirect. Schools could count on parents to volunteer both time and resources in a concerted effort to facilitate learning. If parents were unable to provide their physical presence, their emotional support was unwavering. Over time this partnership has eroded in many African American communities. The support that historically wove the relationship fabric

The interactions between parents and teachers are integral to a child’s educational growth.

of our communities has become ragged and tattered. Though times have changed and many parents no longer have the flexibility of yesteryear, the basic principles of support have not. In today’s society, the typical working parent cannot spend countless hours at the school. However, the school should be able to count on that working parent to be a pillar of support in times of need. Unfortunately, this doesn’t always occur.

Parental support for education isn’t simply limited to volunteering. It also includes answering the school’s call regarding your child’s behavior, monitoring his/her grades to remain abreast of their progress, and implementing consequences when either academics or behavior fall short. School leaders may often speak with parents of challenging children with the response being, “I’m tired of the school calling me, don’t call me anymore” or “you all deal with him/her.” Just as disheartening is the child returning to school after speaking with the parent at home and saying, “I told you she wasn’t gonna do anything, she never does.” Parental involvement in the home, as well as in the school, is essential to the education process. We cannot educate and cultivate productive citizens in silos; we must work together. Once, teachers and administrators were an extension of parents. Today they’re often viewed as an adversary. It is neither appropriate nor productive to verbally abuse teachers and school officials. When this occurs, it’s evident that eroded relationships have created a deposition of mistrust. Lest we forget, the pendulum swings both ways. It is incumbent upon schools to make a sincere and consistent effort to invite and engage parents. Parents must feel both welcomed by and a part of the schoolhouse. Teachers must openly communicate with parents and reach out to those who are saddled with numerous responsibilities. Like those who work at night—during parent conference hours—and must sleep during the day. Being in this together means making a way when the easy way won’t work. As educators, we must ensure that parents are embraced and that we do all that we can to rebuild the partnership that was forged so many years ago in our community schools. If our children are to succeed, we must remember that we are playing on the same team. n Connie Franklin

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COVER

light ‘E M up Mario Cobian’s mission to ignite the minds and futures of America’s youth. To learn more about and support the tour or bring it to a city near you, visit

COLLEGE TOUR.COM

It’s amazing what these young people can accomplish when given the right opportunity.

ario Cobian is a man after millennials’ minds. Fully committed to millennial leadership development, Mario is the founder and designer of the LIT College Tour. LIT—which stands for Leadership, Innovation, Transformation—is a non-profit that brings together college students from under-represented groups and industry leaders. Leaders who serve to energize, motivate, and inspire the students to lead. LIT was founded on the idea that millennials are steering our country’s direction as the

most “diverse, educated and wired generation in American history.” It gives students the tools to not only recognize this power, but also harness it as leaders and innovators. And to do so through “the exchange of ideas and strategies, discovery of insights, peer-to-peer dialogue, interaction with industry leaders, and mentorship.”

country. For he’s a partner—a brother even— sharing the journey in providing exceptional education for our young people. And he does so with an impressive thoughtfulness for and commitment to millennials, seeing them as his own children and LIT College Tour as his gift to them—and to the world—because it’s something he himself never got to have.

It is armed with this purpose that Cobian and company travel across the United States bringing powerhouse speakers and worldclass business leaders to students all over the

Cobian grew up in a small town (population 2,500 to give an idea) four hours southeast of Los Angeles along the California-Mexico border. He wound up attending California

State University Fullerton to study business administration with an emphasis in marketing. After changing his major a few times—all of which taught him skills that he still uses today—Cobian landed back on marketing. But he found that there weren’t many experiential opportunities in his field as a student. Luckily, he found a job that spurred his passion. And not too long after, he founded his own integrated marketing firm, the Cobian Marketing Group. And it was through his company that LIT was spawned.

substantive and personal way has become really important to him. “I’ve always wanted to give back in a way that was reflective of my experiences in industries that I have the most expertise in.” Those industries being marketing, media and public relations, entertainment, STEAM (science, technology, engineering, arts, and math) and entrepreneurship. Which eventually became LIT’s core learning tracks.

One day during the 2013-2014 school year, Cobian had a particularly open discussion

with the help of those 2013-2014 interns, he founded LIT College Tour to help students transition from collegiate to professional careers. He initially relied heavily on his agency contacts, resources and network that he had developed over 17 years. Since then, LIT has grown into an expansive network of speakers and students who represent the organization’s most important relationships and assets. The speakers are potential mentors, employers, sponsors and board members who provide invaluable expertise, insights and support for LIT. The students— both conference participants and attendees— provide the energy, passion and work to

with a group of interns who lamented the lack of both mentorship available to underrepresented groups and entrepreneurial experience during college. Cobian was amazed and dismayed that not much had changed since he’d graduated. There were—and are— very few (if any) independent, multicultural, entrepreneurial and mentor-driven programs helping under-served groups. People like minorities, women, LGBT, veterans, and disabled persons.

market and produce each event, spread the message and take the organization to new places. Together, the groups comprise LIT’s arsenal, lending to its explosive success. “LIT is produced for students by students. We provide our students with the tools, resources, guidance, and everything else they need to develop the program, market the event, produce it and take it on tour. It’s amazing what these young people can accomplish when given the right opportunity.”

opportunities. The fact that we were able to visit three markets this year and will be in eight next year is a huge accomplishment.”

His disappointment turned into resolve and,

Cobian’s delight in giving back in such a

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When asked which tour stop was his favorite, Mario responded, “They’re all my favorites because each market is so unique: the speakers, students, program and

So what’s next for Mario Cobian, marketing expert, entrepreneur, and Father of Millennial Leadership? “Finding happiness and satisfaction through fulfilling relationships, work, and life. I’m not married and don’t have any kids so that’s definitely on my radar!” n Lynita MitchellBlackwell

TOTAL WELLNESS

he perks of sex extend well beyond the bedroom, as sex not only feels good, but it can also be good for you. There is strong evidence demonstrating the importance of touch to good health. Researchers found that the chemical composition of your body is changed by touch. For example, caressing, hugging, stroking, and cuddling send a chain reaction of chemicals to your brain, giving the signal that all is right with the world. A healthy sexual relationship fosters happiness, immunity, longevity, pain management, and sexual and reproductive health. Here are a few benefits that a healthy sex life can have for you: Keep Your Immune System in Tune Studies have shown that people with healthy sex lives have higher levels of antibodies to fight off germs, viruses, and other intruders. You should still do all other things to make your immune system happy, such as eat right, exercise, get sleep, and use a condom. Improves Women’s Bladder Control A strong pelvic floor is important for avoiding Urinary Incontinence (overactive bladder). Good sex is like a workout for your pelvic floor muscles. Having an orgasm causes those muscles to contract, which strengthens them.

Counts as Exercise Sex is a really great form of exercise. It will not replace the treadmill, but it counts for some workout. Sex uses about 5 calories per minute (that’s 150 calories per half-hour) and bumps up your heart rate using various muscles. Like with exercise, consistency helps maximize the benefits, so make time in your schedule for it on a regular basis.

... the chemical composition of your body is changed by touch. Lowers your Blood Pressure Many studies have found that sexual intercourse specifically (not masturbation) lowers systolic blood pressure. That’s the first number on your blood pressure test. Lowers Heart Attack Risk A good sex life is good for your heart and helps keep your estrogen and testosterone levels in balance. Increased heart rate and deep breathing leads to improved circulation.

One study showed men who had sex at least twice a week were half as likely to die of heart disease as men who had sex rarely. Lessens Pain Before you reach for an aspirin, try an orgasm. Sexual arousal and orgasms increase endorphins and corticosteroids that raise pain thresholds. Stimulation without orgasm can also ease chronic back, leg and arthritis pain, reduce menstrual cramps, and headache. Improve Sleep If you suffer from insomnia, having sex before bed will improve your sleep. After an orgasm the hormone prolactin is released which is responsible for the feeling of relaxation, thus the sudden sleepiness after sex. Eases Stress Touching and hugging can release your body’s natural feel-good hormones and thus soothe stress and anxiety. Sexual arousal releases a brain chemical that revs up your brain’s pleasure and reward system and it can be an exhilarating mood lifter. Sex draws a couple closer together, can create a deeper bond and can boost your esteem and happiness. It’s the prescription for a healthy and happy life. n Liz St. John Hall & Dionne M. Lackey

The

of POWER

Intimacy Sex and its health benefits

TOTAL WELLNESS

FA S T [ER] R

unning means something different to everyone. To some, it’s several miles at the crack of dawn on a freezing day, a running buddy by their side. For others, it’s watching their neighbor circling the block on a Saturday morning. To me, it’s the journey I’ve had over the past year and a half, the accomplishments along the way, and the gratitude I have for all those who have been a part of it. I enjoyed running sporadically: on the treadmill at the gym, my first 5K in 2009 (it was fun and I left, my first 10K in 2012 (I was completely out of shape and walked a large portion of it, finishing in 1:13:54). It was fun, and certainly more challenging than I expected. I finished in 32:04 and left the parking lot feeling great. In 2012, I signed up for a 10K. Completely out of shape, I struggled and walked a large portion of it, finishing in 1:13:54. The real story begins, though, in April of 2013 when I began running consistently. At the time, I had been experiencing migraines so severe that I ended up in the emergency room several times over the course of a month. Whitney, my best friend from college, invited me to run in the Shad Run 5K to benefit Ely Park in Lambertville, New Jersey, which was sponsored by her parents’ Physical Therapy and Wellness Center. I wanted desperately to do the

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5K since I had missed out the previous year. The day of the race I can’t say I was feeling my best. I tried convincing Whitney to switch our registrations to the onemile walk but she joked we wouldn’t fit in with all the seniors and their walkers. She convinced me to try the 5K, and we ended up jogging the whole race together, finishing in 41:21. After the Shad Run, I decided to commit to running five days a week and racing a few times a month. My migraines improved. I felt healthier overall and fell in love with running. When people saw me they asked how running was going. Suddenly I was known as “the runner” in the family. By the end of 2013, I had completed 16 5K and 10K races. Since then, I’ve completed races at sports arenas like Yankee Stadium. I’ve met new people who’ve become my closest friends. And I’ve joined an online women’s running club where I sometimes post questions or comment on something I’m proud of. It’s wonderful being part of the greater running community and being able to connect with other runners, near and far. They even helped me with a long-time struggle: finding the right running shoes. And while some running club members, and myself, have also celebrated weight loss achieved through running—between

the Shad Runs in 2013 and 2014, I lost 42 pounds—that’s not really my main focus. Someone once asked me about goal weight and I responded that the only number that matters to me is the one on my Garmin. I’m obsessed with improving my times. My personal best for the 5K has improved to 26:50, for which I have my brother to thank. When he came out for his very first race, I was attempting to keep up with him and I shaved nine seconds off my time. As I have gotten faster, I’ve won several races for my female age division. The first time I placed, I was actually just sitting off to the side of the awards ceremony waiting for all the cars to leave so I could get out of the parking lot. When I heard my name, I was in shock that I came in first. Ever since then I have always really enjoyed being at a race and trying to place and I now have a scrapbook with all my race bibs, medals, and pictures at the races. My accomplishments have become what my running journey means to me. It’s about pushing myself to new limits and trying to reach a new personal best. I strive for a sub-25 5K and my next big race is the half marathon. And I will undoubtedly accomplish those goals. I’ll look back and continue to be grateful for everyone who has supported me and encouraged me, and then I’ll set my sights on a new goal. n Patti Behen

recently realized that I have to make changes in my life. One of which is opening myself up to new experiences by trying something different every month. Because as human beings, we tend to eat the same foods, date the same type of people and listen to the same type of music. You have to break the monotony of life to see what else you can accomplish or who else you can become. So in September I decided to try camping. My friend, Jewel, introduced camping to me. When she first started raving about it, in my head, she sounded like the voice of Charlie Brown’s teacher (don’t tell her I said that). But eventually her enthusiasm and talk of the beauty of waking up in nature won me over. So I then proceeded to enlist my friends to join me. This was not easy because most of them equated camping with staying in a rustic cabin with a hot tub and a pool table. Alas, my friend Natalie was open to the experience and our planning begun. We made reservations at Lake Allatoona in Cartersville, Georgia, and enlisted another friend who let us borrow his dome tent. As we gathered supplies—including cots, a portable heater, first aid and tool kits, a propane stove, and utensils—our enthusiasm was building. And once camping day was upon the four of us, we were ready for our adventure. When we got to the campsite, we noticed that we were definitely in the minority. (Remember when Oprah advocated for African Americans to start camping? Clearly we were the only

old ne world ones who followed her advice.) After that assessment, we pitched our tent and started cooking our food. The experience of being in nature and knowing that you can be happy without all the trappings of society was liberating. One of the best moments was toasting marshmallows over the fire and having great conversation without the daily distractions. Overall, I had an amazing time and now that I know everything about camping after this one trip (insert laughter), I can give you some top camping tips: 1. Make sure you bring a heater that works. It was really cold and windy that night, and our heater was on the fritz. 2. Do not look at scary movies before you go to sleep because every noise is The Killer coming for you. 3. Pitch your tent close to a tree for 3AM emergency bathroom breaks—don’t judge. And lastly, have fun and be open to new adventures in life. As so eloquently stated in the movie Forrest Gump, “Life is like a box of chocolates.” Enjoy different types of chocolate, you never know what you’re going to get, but that one tasty piece makes everything worth it. My new experience next month is speed dating. I hope I find some chocolate that looks like Idris Elba! n Faye A. Fields

new d

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Full court men

One team’s work on the court and in the community.

Established in 2011 by owner Jerell Shearin, the Georgia Spartans have been since striving to provide a positive avenue for young men to be upstanding influences in personal and community aspects. This is evidenced by their Atlanta Learn 2 Live program, which establishes year-round events to help give back and influence positive change in places that otherwise go unnoticed. These events include health fairs, Toys for Tots drives, and fundraiser basketball games meant to raise awareness about health causes. Their Backto-School event, hosted in Dekalb County, has thrived for three consecutive years. Having won and run, respectively, two United Men Basketball League championships (in 2011 and 2012) and plenty of successful programs through Learn 2 Live, the Spartans’ credibility and humility is recognized—and respected— in the community. They’ve been noted by multiple media outlets, including Champion Newspaper, BBall Addicts, and Real Talk Sports Show. And they strive to remain a community staple that looks to partner with local businesses and continue to give back and give hope. The Georgia Spartans will open their 2015 season on January 17th at 7:45PM at the YMCA Andrew Young Center (2220 Cambellton Road, Atlanta, GA) and it will continue through June 2015. Check out georgiaspartans.net for tickets, tryout information, merchandise, and the chance to win a vacation to Las Vegas.

UPCOMING SPECIAL EVENT GAMES hey’re not just going hard in the paint. They’re going hard in the community that brought them here. The Georgia Spartans—a championship-winning semi-pro basketball team— aims to give men of all ages a positive outlook on life through the game of basketball. Their leadership role stems from their basketball development program, in which the Spartans give local and non-local men the chance to play at a professionally competitive level. The Spartans operate within the Universal Basketball Association (UBA), affording some aspiring players the opportunity to advance to the NBA or international basketball leagues.

OPENING NIGHT & FAMILY GAME NIGHT January 17, 2015 | Televised GREEK ALUMNI NIGHT January 28, 2015 | Televised TEACHER APPRECIATION NIGHT February 22, 2015 FAN APPRECIATION NIGHT March 14, 2015 | Televised HIGH SCHOOL CONTEST CONCERT March 21, 2015 | Televised VETERAN APPRECIATION May 24, 2015

FOR THE FULL GAME SCHEDULE, VISIT GEORGIASPARTANS.NET

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EMPOWERED STYLE

SEAM

DREAMS S How Marian Collier got her start with her clothing line, MC Collections.

ince 1993, Marian Collier has been designing fine garments known for their value, quality, and distinctiveness. Her collection, custom designs and shows have garnered much praise and numerous positive reviews. Marian’s foray into fashion began with her job as a department manager for a Macy’s many years ago. It soon became clear to her that she needed to take a leap of faith and follow her God-given dream to be a fashion designer— after all she did go to the International School of Fashion. So she began her design career with a line of men’s and lady’s vests. Shortly thereafter, Collier acquired a contract with the Atlanta Hilton to design unique and colorful vests for the downtown bar staff. Customers lauded her eye for quality fabric and one-ofa-kind details that resulted in durable and stylish designs. Which led to people wanting more—skirts, pants, dresses and even gowns! Colors, shapes, and architecture all inspire Collier’s designs and she’s always focused on enhancing and pleasing the client. Her talent for ensuring proper fit and design, combined with her innate creative abilities, results in an effortless and danceable line that reflects the kind of woman she is herself; strong, sexy, fun, and fearless. Collier is also just as devoted to the community as she is to her clothing. She devotes her spare time to mentoring fellow minority business owners and organizing fashion shows for corporate and marketing clients. And because she feels that it’s a dying art, Collier teaches children how to sew and also holds “Mommy and Me” sewing classes. Collier also leads interns from Bauder College as part of their 280-credit requirement. You can order Collier’s designs at mccollections. etsy.com. You can also find her women’s collection at Carla’s Boutique in East Point and Macy’s in the Greenbriar Mall.

B OLD ARTIST: NEZ EROK “Beautiful” is a song that chronicles a survivor’s resilience. And it’s a tale that hits more than close to home for the singer and songwriter, Nez Erok.

and raised in a home that valued its Turkish culture. Thus her natural talent for music was nurtured by a deep desire to not only find a voice, but to be heard. Nez’s path eventually

Nez, an advocate against women violence and supporter of causes like Xoticar International Women’s Day Luncheon, personally prevailed over oppression and domestic violence. “Beautiful’s” emotive lyrics resulted from the trials and triumphs of Nez’s real life situation. And now her song has inspired multiple remixes, is a Top 20 underground hit, and is a semifinalist in the Silent River Film Festival.

Despite her humble school choir beginnings, Nez Erok now collaborates with producers from all over the globe, including Nik Felippe, the producer behind “Beautiful.” She continues to bridge the gap between house and emotion, as evidenced by her breakthrough album, “Play by Love.” And she remains charged with rawest emotions so that she can create music that must simply be heard. n

Nez was born in Perth Western Australia

BOOK REVIEW

LIFE BEFORE LIFE

our thoughts, emotions and memories are actually emergent properties of the physical and electrochemical systems that make up our bodies. And while I wouldn’t have disagreed with the idea that humans and animals have “souls,” I felt strongly that our souls were inextricably bound to our physical bodies.

RATING:

ike any book reviewer, I read a lot of books, both fiction and non-fiction. Some confirm my existing views and some challenge them, but every once in a while a book comes along that literally pulls the rug from under my feet and turns my world upside down. Life Before Life: A Scientific Investigation of Children’s Memories of Previous Lives by Dr. Jim B. Tucker was one such book. It’s not a new book. It was published in 2005 and based on research files which in some cases date back decades. The ideas in it are not new either. The subject of children’s memories of previous lives has been the subject of many books, documentary films and blogs. What struck me about this particular book was neither its novelty nor its originality, but rather the scientific rigor of its investigation into the phenomenon of reincarnation. Disclaimer: I approached this book with strong skepticism. I adhered to the belief that

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led her to electronica, where she redefined the scope of the genre. She created house tracks that captured the emotion usually reserved for ballads. In fact, “Beautiful” was initially produced as a dance track, but Nez released an acoustic version to reach a wider audience.

town). Investigators who set out to verify the numerous statements he’d made about the previous personality, his family, his house, and even his neighbors were struck not only by the boy’s accuracy, but by how difficult they had been to verify, since the man who perfectly fit the boy’s descriptions had died in 1941. What swayed me about Kermal’s case was that, though remarkable, it’s not unique. There are thousands of similar globally documented cases, some of which are even more compelling than Kermal’s. For example, the boy and girl who, at different times in different countries, relayed obscure yet verifiable details about the lives of two people who died of a gunshot wound and in a traffic accident, respectively. Both children were born after the incidences, lived distantly from the lives they recalled, and had prominent birthmarks corresponding exactly (authenticated by medical records) to the wounds. The memories and birthmarks are a mystery, but the improbable links between the two strongly suggest reincarnation.

That was before I read about the case of Kermal, a young Islamic boy in Turkey who, in 1997, told the researcher investigating his case that in his previous life he had been a wealthy Armenian Christian living in a three story house behind a church in an Istanbul suburb (500 miles away from his home

Whatever your views after reading this book— religious or otherwise—I suspect you may find it difficult not to strongly feel that our human souls, however they may be defined scientifically, have a life separate from our physical bodies. And those who already believe in reincarnation may feel vindicated by serious, credible scientists and evidence to back them up. And those of you who, like I, are hardboiled skeptics... prepare to be amazed. n Paul Sean Grieve

TO THE We all want the same easy, fun, healthy, versatile hair that we don’t have to take two hours to style and that will shine and bounce in the wind without a lot of product and without a professional fee. Well, it can happen!

ith a healthy foundation to give your hair shine and a great cut that can get your locks to lay in place, you can achieve a pro look for less. A great way to do this? Trimming it yourself! The reward for this is two fold. First, you’re saving money. And the second perk is that no one is using the thinning your hair. This texturing method is something they call ‘giving hair movement’ or taking the fullness out. But in reality, this professional technique is at the root (hair pun intended) of a couple of issues.

Did you once have long hair but now length retention is a struggle? Well, ask yourself if you recently got your hair cut—or even if you just “got a trim” to “make it healthy”—by a professional. And then ask yourself if they used the aforementioned technique. If so, you may now have your culprit! Another way to to tell: have you ever noticed that your hair won’t hold a curl? It’s a sign your hair is thinned out or texturized with scissors! (Healthy hair can hold a curl, even if you run your fingers through it!)

Damage may start when a stylist cuts the hair unevenly. This causes tangles—and frizziness!—which results in shedding. And if you add heat to all of that trouble? Well it merely exacerbates the issue. These underlying problems result in a bigger, more long-term issue: the inability to retain length.

Now can you see the benefit of trimming your own hair?

This piece of advice may be a bit unconventional, but it may be the best thing you can do until you find a trained Vidal Sassoon stylist (I’m personally Sassoon

trained, but choose who you trust) who you’ll feel comfortable with telling not to thin your hair. So how do you trim your own hair? Here are some tips:

GET a good of scissors the USE a good pairpair of scissors from afrom beauty beauty supply store andhair. only use supply store and only to cut them to cut hair.

DO this on dry or wet hair. When dry, you willSECTION see the damage more andthe it’s more your hair down likely you won’t take too much off. middle, bring it in front of your

shoulders (if it’s long enough), and

SECTION hair down the middle, bring in trim straight across. front ofthe yourbottom shoulders (if long enough) and trim the bottom straight across.

chase Yes, it’s that simple! And now you should see a big difference in the amount of shedding and tangling. Remember that you can cut your hair while either wet or dry. When dry, you can

CUT about an inch or so, or whatever you’re comfortable with. (You will see the uneven ends from the last cut. It may take 2-3 cuts to remove those ends.) WAIT about 6-8 weeks between trims.

Now GO FOR IT! BOLDFAVORMAGAZINE.COM

see the damage and it’s more likely you won’t take too much off.And you can cut your hair for however long until you find the right stylist. I suggest Vidal Sassoon stylists because they undergo training that requires the stylist to cut hair where it falls naturally. They cut your hair to properly suit your face shape by using the shape of your head as a gauge. Another nuance of Sassoon training programs: they don’t use razors, round brushes, or curling irons. Many programs—including Paul Mitchell and Aveda—don’t fully grasp or acknowledge the Sassoon fundamentals, which can leave your salon professional lacking. (Hey, even I need a good Sassoon stylist in my life. I can trim the front for maintenance, but I go to them for the best, fullest result.) So instead of recalling the essentials, they incorporate their

personal texturing techniques with razors and thinning shears or even straight scissors. This is called point cutting! And while it makes hair look good now, chances are that it might not four months from now when the average client wants both shiny healthy hair and its length. Really, these texturing techniques are a part of skills testing—we do them to show off in front of our colleges. But the fundamentals are important. When the hair is cut with precision, the more likely it is that it will grow out well and will be easy to style. Hopefully, you’ll feel more comfortable with taking on your own hair! n Jung Kang

Good luck!

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Cold weather trends

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old weather is approaching, but you donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have to substitute warmth for style. There are some key pieces that you can add to help you stay warm and fierce all at once!

1. Pastel Outerwear

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Winter colors are feminine this year. Pastels pinks, blues and greens are go-to colors for the season. Colors considered to be appropriate for spring are now brightening up cold winter days. The chicest way to pull off this trend is with a pastel coat, which will keep you warm and cozy.

2. Fringe A hint of fringe will add edge to any outfit. This season fringe is used as an accent to jackets, shoes and handbags. A fringe tassel on a pair of booties, dangling from a cross body bag or a beaded fringe statement necklace can all add a punch to your winter outfits.

3. Colored Faux Fur If you are willing to take a risk and stand out of the crowd we suggest trying a colored faux fur. If you dare, a jewel tone colored fur would be perfect. But, for those of you on the conservative side, we suggest a wrap or clutch with fur accents. Adding fur to your wardrobe this fall is a definite must.

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4. Plaid A classic pattern, plaid is always a winter essential. We love plaid because itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s appropriate for all occasions. There are endless options to incorporate plaid, from the classic plaid shirt to a pair of plaid trousers. Plaid is always an easy, safe and super chic option.

5. Capes The cape is a favorite trend this season. They add dimension and depth as a great layering piece. Capes can pull an outfit together. Depending on the material, it can be worn as outerwear or a lighter jacket. It looks great with skirts, jeans and trousers. If you had to pick a trend to rock, the cape should be it. Pick one, two or all of these trends to incorporate into your wardrobe, and you will have one of the chicest this winter! n Filthy Chic (Tamra and Keelia Asbury)

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Are your eyes your best feature? This trend will make them pop! It’s all about architectural lines and smudged eyeliner, creating an effortless romantic smoky eye. Winged liner plus textured eyes or lips makes this trend the perfect marriage of glamour and grunge. Like Instagram beauty tiarramonet’s look!

OFF COLOR

This trend is perfect for the daring! The key to this romantic look is to pick a feature to emphasize. Think a clean, even-toned face with the perfect sculpted brow and a shockingly sensual pop of color—just like makeup artist Renny Vasquez’s (@rennyvasquez) look! How romantic is that bold deep red lip on a perfectly polished face? Very!

FALL

makeup TRENDS

Right now, it’s all about looks that will spark the romance! This season’s makeup trends range from the sexy androgynous to the bold and daring. There is a trend to suit every personality and comfort level. And you’re guaranteed to find a romantic look that works perfectly for you. n Christelsie Johnson, makeup artist

UPON REFLECTION

If shimmer is your thing, then you’ll love this soft and simple look with a hint of sparkle. You can use glitter eyeliner or even a touch of shimmer placed on the inner corner of the eyes. But remember: a little sparkle goes a long way, so don’t overdo it! Just take it from one-half the twin Instagram glam-squad, GlamTwinz334, glamtwinkels1.

UNPROCESSED

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AKA the “no makeup, makeup look.” This trend looks effortless and clean with foundation, the slightest hint of natural-toned blush, neutral flesh-toned lips, and a touch of mascara. And you’re done! Just like the glamorous Instagramer jenniferolaleye. It says, “I’m comfortable in my own skin and I don’t need much to look beautiful.”

LEADING THE WAY A look into how the Leading Lady Legacy tour has progressed since its first stop and the speakers whoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve brought it to fruition. 42

LEADERSHIP

his fall, the southern United States warmly welcomed Leading Lady Legacy with fantastic energy, kicking off the combination book tour and women’s conference in Lanett, Alabama. From September to January 2015, speakers graced various cities with wisdom and empowerment. The first three stops were shining examples of the inspiration that Leading Lady Legacy instilled in its attendees. In Lanett, evangelist Stephanie Davenport kicked off the tour with her words on Godgiven power and how using it effectively and purposefully means connecting with the right. Hair and wardrobe stylist Traci Jefferson shared her tips for empowered style and beauty philosophy: “None of us are perfect, but we are all beautiful. Value, compliment, and support one another.” Sonji Willingham, a small business expert, also spoke about the importance of having a plan on which to build a legacy, noting that the right knowledge and skills are cornerstones for taking control and seizing opportunities. Lynita Mitchell Blackwell (pictured left), of Leading Through Living Community (and conference convener), closed with the “10 Steps to Becoming the Leaders of Your Lives.” She offered to the room, “You are important and have purpose. … Taking time to get to know who you are, what you want, and how to communicate that to others is key to establishing your legacy. Real love and success begins with you!” The next stop on the tour was Fort Campbell, Kentucky, where Elder Meaghan Davis first discussed the spirit within legacy, urging that leadership isn’t about being perfect, but about moving through any struggle. Alberta Lampkins—publisher, author and the Fort Campbell tour leg hostess—impressed that “we have the power within us to do whatever it is we want to do. But we must plan so we may identify problems, assess risks, and create solutions.” She also noted the importance of seeing solutions instead of the problems. Wellness expert Beverly Tate reminded Fort Campbell attendees that success means nothing when a person it too unhealthy to

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enjoy it and that a sedentary lifestyle can negate an hour-long work out. In her words: Get up and move! Veronica Martin stressed the importance of resilience and determination to any legacy and of regulating responsibilities as a way to rejuvenate. Cynthia Walton, love maven, revealed, “men love a confident woman, but not a cocky woman. They want the same things that women want: love, affection, appreciation, and attention. … Love begins with you. Begin with self-affirmations. Then you’ll be ready to be ‘damzeled.’” Then in Greenville, South Carolina, at Long Branch Baptist Church—thanks to Pastor & Lady Dogan’s incredible hospitality— attendees tuned in to Minister Kim Adams of Beauty of Ashes Ministry. She expressed, “God has given each of us beauty. Beauty is what we pour out, not what we put on.” Health Stylist Nasha Snipes explained that “health is a birth right, but you must say YES to it” by drinking more water (to move sugars and hydrate cells), exercising frequently with activities that motivate you, and eating REAL food like fiber, vegetables and healthy selfprepared snacks. Cynthia Walton (the love maven) also made an appearance at this stop, opening with how confidence shapes beauty. “To be confident, you must love yourself. So the start of a great relationship must begin with you.” Walton also pointed out that finding someone of the same caliber—a leader— requires going to leading places. And that keeping things spicy in marriage means doing whatever personally empowers a couple. Lynita Mitchell-Blackwell closed Greenville saying, “YOU are the woman you’ve been waiting for all of your life! You are endowed with all the purpose, passion and power that are necessary to achieve greatness. No need to be a “mini-me”—be the big YOU!” Every leg of the Leading Lady Legacy tour has proven amazing, with Lanett, Fort Campbell and Greenville proving to be early successes and later stops following close behind. Since Greenville, Leading Lady Legacy has visited Columbus, GA, and Raleigh, NC, with future stops in Atlanta and Jacksonville, Florida. And it’s a supporter of AL Savvy Publications’ annual cruise—”We Cruizin”— to the Bahamas in October 2015. To follow the journey and hopefully catch the conference in a city near you, visit www.LeadingLadyLegacy.com!

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IN UNISON Understanding teamwork, leadership and the things that drive them.

Today, most businesses are finding that working as a team can potentially bring more innovation, efficiency and productivity, which can all lead to better long-term business solutions. But every team needs a captain at the helm to steer them towards success.

LEADERSHIP

H It takes nearly six instances of positive feedback for every negative one to bolster an effective team.

igh performance teams are diverse groups of people that can solve problems, resolve conflict and work collaboratively to achieve common goals. They employ several pillars to support and to surge forward. Pillars like open (and honest) communication—eliminating confusion through active listening will increase cooperation and comfort. Another is accountability, because a team is more willing to trust (and find competent) those who take responsibility for and commit to their actions. Also, team evaluation before, during, and after projects to assess efforts is essential.

Excellent leaders recognize potential and can delegate intelligently and appropriately for the benefit of the team and the individual. They listen actively and make decisions based on facts and input from their trusted team members. And they select their team based on the necessary skill sets to provide the best outcomes. And the best leaders? They provide an autonomous architecture informed by mastery and purpose. In other words, they do not micromanage. They assign jobs, not tasks, to show that they trust their people to be able to “run with the ball” as long as they clearly understand the timelines and parameters of any assignment.

Other pillars include setting clear goals (to align team and organization vision), drafting problem-solving strategies, valuing the skills of each person, and instilling a team culture of trust, appreciation and respect (a simple “thank you” is powerful). That last one is especially important because, according to a study by Emily Heaphy and Marcial Losada, it takes nearly six instances of positive feedback for every negative one to bolster an effective team. Expressing gratitude for a job well done goes a long way towards high performance.

Great leaders ask great questions so that they receive creative, outside-the-box answers. They provide support and offer clear instructions, rather than orders. While effective leaders provide skills training so that team members can expand their abilities. This could provide them with future opportunities in new areas.

But when it comes down to it, developing and managing a successful high-performance team takes effective, intelligent and committed leadership. Team leaders must communicate with honesty, clarity and impact. Which is crucial to articulating their vision for the organization and aligning the team with that vision. Leaders must be willing and able to open doors to new opportunities, be forward looking, supportive and offer mentorship to their team as necessary. Learning to spot different types of leaders, and identifying what kind of leader you are, is principal to growing both you and your team.

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Overall, teamwork is becoming increasingly fundamental to business practices. So it’s important to be a team player—when we work together we can be more successful in achieving our goals. Teamwork is the sum of individual efforts, so everyone needs to contribute their expertise to achieve common goals. They need to know their duties and responsibilities as well as understand and appreciate the contributions expected of others (all while maintaining respect). But leaders are just as essential in promoting unity and efficiency. When people feel supported, appreciated, and acknowledged—and when they’ve been offered autonomy—they develop inner purpose and motivation. Team members become engaged with their jobs because they are enjoying what they do. A happy workplace is a productive, successful and long-lasting workplace. And isn’t that what we all want? n Sandy Chernoff

T W I N AMBITION

AMBITION

TWIN With double the BOLD Favor, twin activists Hassanatu Blake and Hussainatu Blake Mumford have founded Focal Point Global to alleviate the gap between global compassion.

IV and AIDS killing entire generations. Girls and boys stolen or sold into sexual slavery as early as age 9. Access to education denied to hundreds of thousands of youth due to poverty, war and famine. These are the harsh realities put forth in a Washington Post article depicting the lives of children in Africa, Asia and the U.S. that galvanized sister activists Hassanatu Blake and Hussainatu Blake Mumford to action. Armed with an arsenal of educational resources that include expertise in public health policy, law, international relations, and German and African cultural studies, the sisters quickly made their ideas for change a reality. In 2010, they launched Focal Point Global (FPG), a non-profit organization designed to help young people ages 12-19 “foster global partnerships to create the next generation of leaders through peer education and service learning.” Said Blake, “Focal Point was a shared passion from the start. We’re twins, so we’ve been working together since the womb. We learn from one another.

LEADERSHIP

The sisters were born in Limbe, Cameroon and grew up in a bi-cultural home in Baltimore, Maryland. Working and studying abroad in Namibia, South Africa, Zambia, Jamaica, Dominica and Germany, the twins saw a disparity in how the values of service and empathy were expressed in different cultures and wanted to bridge the gap to affect change. “We wanted to explore how cultures could come together and discuss common issues in their communities. We are all essentially people. We wanted to start with youth around the world,” said Blake Mumford. Working with youth all over the world, the sisters saw how culture and education access created a significant gap in human dignity. They also observed how that gap impacted youth perception of their futures and engagement in their present. Blake Mumford explained the diverse perspectives: “With American students, it’s an introduction and we want them to open their eyes on a global scale, beyond the American viewpoint and last we encourage them to act. When it comes to our African students, many times, they are very aware and their view is that the rest of the world doesn’t care about them. Once they find out [that others care], they care. But that’s where the disconnect comes from, that’s why we have them implement projects that they can carry on throughout high school.” Focused on changing those viewpoints, the sisters developed FPG’s programs with a longterm perspective in mind. Blake explained, “Our programs, our initiatives are a spark— they serve as a catalyst to start a lifetime of work to improve the world. Making sure that they are encouraged in everything they do... Career goals have more to do with making money but how does that help you improve the community?” FPG’s projects are developed with a global range in mind, therefore, major projects occur every two years. The first of FPG’s initiatives focused on the need for educational

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awareness in the fight against HIV/AIDS rates in Africa and the world. Ten teens on two continents empowered by education, leadership training and peer support were engaged in training others on the soaring HIV

Founders Hassanatu Blake and Hussainatu Blake Mumford

rate of infection amongst their peers. In 2012, FPG expanded its focus to child trafficking awareness. According to a 2007 report from the U.S. Department of State, 800,000 people are trafficked annually across international borders. Plans for 2014 include continuing to expand HIV education. In recognition of their efforts and impact on global awareness, the sisters have received numerous awards: in 2012, Focal Point Global was recognized on the world stage with an invite for the prestigious White House Champion of Change award. In 2013, global leadership program TEDx recognized them at TEDxEmory. Moving forward, the sisters will continue to do their part in changing the world for youth from their respective places in the world. Future plans include launching “The Global Education Benefit” fundraisers globally to support their global cause for the next generation.

The goal of Focal Point Global has always been to get young people talking.

To learn more about and support Focal Point Global, visit focalpointglobal.org. n Ebony Hillsman

Orange is NOt the new green.

double-check references, and we complete multiple interviews before hiring. Yet I still encounter “undesirables” who know how to beat the system and filter through the cracks. How? Some people know how to put on a good show. Once they’re comfortable, the real wolf emerges from sheep’s clothing; they turn out to be highly skilled, but have low moral character with zero ethical boundaries.

the importance of ethics & morality in business.

Now, I don’t mean to scare you and I’m not a cynic. I truly believe most employees are doing the best they can. I also believe that a thorough vetting process can weed out most undesirable candidates. One way I guarantee hiring quality, qualified people is to ask:

1. Could I depend on this person in a jam? 2. How much will I have to review this person’s work to make sure it’s done right?

anaging a well-run business is not all glitz and glamour. It takes a lot to stay in the green. You must ensure that your employees are ethical and law abiding and that can be a real grind. Because, no matter where you work, there will always be some governing or regulatory agency to report to. Whether that’s the “tax man,” a licensing board, or highly regulated clients, there are rules we must follow to stay in business. So it’s interesting that despite hiring the best, and the governing bodies and policies, business owners can still run into trouble. My company runs background checks, we

These questions give a pretty good measure as to the person’s expertise and commitment to resolving issues—without my prompting. I also ask these questions when hiring contracted professional because they, too, can destroy your business if morally bankrupt. For example, most small businesses use contracted tax preparers and accountants. The owner relies on the individual to prepare taxes, meet quarterly deadlines, and keep the company updated on changing tax laws that

can and will affect their business. Not filing or paying taxes, breaking tax rules—intentionally or through negligence—and other unethical actions can and will lead to a business’ downfall. And possibly land the business owner in jail. No matter what people say, orange is not stylish. And it’s most certainly not the new green! As a business owner, you will be tested and tempted to take shortcuts to save time, save money, or just to get things done. If you feel pressured to do so, WALK AWAY. Give yourself a moment to breathe and consider your actions. As the owner, YOU are the ethical compass of the business. It will be you who ultimately makes decisions that create a positive work environment where people are happy and proud to work for you. And if your employees want to be there, they can help you identify and remove those who don’t. We’re all human. We make mistakes. We don’t always do the right thing. But you don’t have to resort to breaking the law or operating amorally or unethically in order to be successful and profitable. You must strive to be the best, surround yourself with the best, and know that most things are a work in progress. An ethical business may not always be fashionable, but it will keep you in the green and out of orange. n Sonji Willingham

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