Her Voice Magazine - Summer 2022

By Women. For Women. About Women.

A Brainerd Dispatch Publication

Coming out of the

DARKNESS How one woman found the hope and strength to overcome a dark time

Summer 2022

PLUS!

+ Church Basement Ladies and the Changing Times

+ Balsam Moon Preserve

+ Tapping Your Way to Peace Her Voice Summer 2022

!

!

CONTENTS

By Women. For Women. About Women.

A Brainerd Dispatch Publication

Summer 2022

My Voice

Hello, summer!

By DeLynn Howard

14

4

Her Farewell

Celebrating 20 years of Heart and Soul

By Susan Smith-Grier

Her Journey

A Celebration of Women in their 90s 7

By Jan Kurtz

Her Healing

The Call of the Wild 20

By Sue Ready The 2021-22 performance season marked the 20th anniversary of the Legacy Chorale of Greater Minnesota and May 1 was the last concert of the VHDVRQ DQG WKH ĆQDO FRQFHUW IRU 6DUDK Aamot who retired from the Legacy Chorale after 20 years.

By Candice Zimmermann

My Mother’s Mission

By Theresa Jarvela

How one woman found the hope and strength to overcome a dark time

Her Passion

Farewell to Our Friend, Audrae 6

For Her

Coming out of the

DARKNESS

24

28

Her Health

Her Story

Tapping Your Way to Peace 30

Coming Out of the Darkness

By Susan Smith-Grier

Summer 2022

PLUS!

+ Church Basement Ladies and the Changing Times

+ Balsam Moon Preserve

+ Tapping Your Way to Peace Her Voice Summer 2022

On the Cover: Charly Niesen found the strength to change the direction of her life. Photo by Kaputured by Kala Photography.

42 Her Table

By Barb Mann

By Sheila Helmberger Toxic relationships and addiction when she was young cost Charly Niesen the custody of three of her children, but today she is living the life she used to only dream about.

Her Family

Her Career

Her History

By Michelle Oie Columnist Michelle Oie is no stranger to road trips. She provides a comprehensive list of tips to help prepare for a family road trip.

By Sheila DeChantal During a visit from her mom, Toni, Grace Czeczok was approached with the offer to come back to Brainerd and eventually take over Mickey’s Pizza and Subs.

By Jan Kurtz Church basement ladies aren’t what they used to be.

Her Clubs

The Best Book Club Ever

By Carolyn Corbett

34

Her Lifestyle

Balsam Moon Preserve: A Dream in the Making 43

Tips for the perfect family road trip 9

Mickey’s Pizza welcomes a third generation 18

What’s Cookin’?

By Sharon Carlson Sharon Carlson shares three summer salad recipes from the “What’s Cookin’’ cookbook from First Congregational United Church of Christ,” published in 1993.

Church Basement Ladies and the Changing Times 38

Her Voice Summer 2022 | 3

HER VOICE By women. For women.

About women.

MY VOICE

PUBLISHER

Pete Mohs ADVERTISING DIRECTOR

Susie Alters Eller

SPECIAL PUBLICATIONS COORDINATOR/ COPY EDITOR

DeLynn Howard

GRAPHIC DESIGNER

Katie Hastings

I

wonder what it would be like to live in a world where it was always June.”

— L.M. Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables.

PHOTOGRAPHER

Joey Halvorson

BY DELYNN HOWARD

Next Issue of Her Voice: Fall/winter issue Publishes Brainerd Dispatch and Echo Journal: October 2022 You can find Her Voice Magazine in over 100 Discover Rack locations in the area or read it online at: www.BrainerdDispatch.com (Magazine Rack Tab) Advertising: (218) 855-5895 Advertising@BrainerdDispatch.com Comments/story ideas:

218-855-5850 delynn.howard@brainerddispatch.com Mail: ATTN: Her Voice Brainerd Dispatch, P.O. Box 974, Brainerd, MN 56401

Quarterly publication of the Brainerd Dispatch.

Printed by Forum Communications. copyright© 2003 4 | Her Voice Summer 2022

Summer. It finally decided to arrive. Is it just me or was that the longest winter in history? I didn’t think those huge snow piles would ever reveal green grass again.

Peg Serani knows all about seeing green. She finds comfort being in nature and has created her own backyard sanctuary. Writer Candice Zimmermann, new to Her Voice, has Peg’s story in this issue. And speaking of backyards, writer Theresa Jarvela tells us about the mission her mom had to keep the critters away from her bird feeders. You’ll be surprised to hear how it ends.

Jan Kurtz approached me with an idea to honor the elderly women (ages 90 and over) of our community with a photo and thought it would be a wonderful idea to give our readers a chance to do the same with their elderly female loved ones. In her article on Page 8, you’ll find the details on how to do just that.

Your submission might be included in the next Her Voice issue.

Throughout these pages, you’ll learn what tapping is, be introduced to Grace Czeczok, third generation owner of Mickey’s in Brainerd, and read the amazing success story of Charly Niesen who struggled with her past but managed to come out of the darkness and live her best life.

Lastly, Susan Smith-Grier wrote a poem to pay homage to our beloved Audrae Gruber who passed away March 31. Audrae was a longtime contributor to Her Voice magazine and she will be greatly missed by those who knew and loved her. May she rest in peace.

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FAREWELL TO OUR FRIEND,

Audrae

HER FAREWELL + poetry

1931-2022

BY SUSAN SMITH-GRIER

When someone special comes in your life, To share your dreams and help though strife When they truly care and lift you up Those days that sadness fills your cup, Appreciate the gift of friendship.

Our paths had crossed throughout the years And then we met, shared joys and tears.

She shared life stories, her ups, her downs.

She shared her laughs, her smiles and frowns.

We cherished our gift of friendship.

Audrae wrote of days gone by, Of simpler times that met her eye.

Not always easy, not always fun She wrote of life ‘til it was done.

She shared the gift of friendship.

Through poems and stories, the words she shared She let us know how much she cared.

She lived with love and passion true Her words often encouraged you.

Such a gift, her friendship.

They say a writer never dies, She just flows on to other skies.

Audrae left her mark behind With stories, poems and acts so kind.

I’ll miss her gentle friendship.

You never know, it seems my friend, Where life is going in the end.

It’s filled with valleys and mountain views So, if you have a chance to choose, Always go for the gift of friendship.

Sweet Audrae, you will be missed by your Her Voice family and Homer’s group.

Susan J. Smith-Grier, mother, grandmother, writer, storyteller, blogger, and Reading Corps tutor of early elementary kids, enjoys the changing seasons of Minnesota lake country. She lives for those moments when the possibilities light up the eyes of her awesome school kids and delights in the power of words and story.

6 | Her Voice Summer 2022

Audrae Gruber, May 28, 1931 -- March 31, 2022.

“Savor the journey.”

HER JOURNEY

Celebrating

+ admiration

WOMEN OVER 90

BY JAN KURTZ

Sylvia, as photographed by her daughter, Sue, describes her mother as admirable, respectable, stoic, witty, hard-working, loyal, beautiful, powerful, faithful, intelligent and loving. Sue said, “She’s very smart and puts up with a lot, yet has limits and LV HIIHFWLYH LQ PDNLQJ \RX ĆJXUH RXW VKHèV VWLOO VKDUS DQG LV VWLOO LQ charge – in her stealth manner.” Sylvia always said, “I hope you’re making wise decisions. I hope your friends make wise decisions.

Do you choose your friends wisely? Do you think it’s wise?”

It happened to me the day my son pointed out that you can tell a woman’s age by looking at her neck. I was on the cusp of thinking about my age, but pushing it to a back burner for when I was “older.”

That day has come. I’m not so sure I am doing this stage of life gracefully. I credit my dominant culture for yet another passage of life cloaked with uncertainty.

When I was “in my youth,” I had no more idea of how to maneuver that phase of life than I did of later taking on the label of wife and the terrifying unknown adventures of motherhood. Those, juxtaposed with career, house and character building, didn’t allow time for reflection. My culture surrounded me with images beginning with Barbie dolls, stringing me through actresses and singers, a scattering of women leaders, now landing me in the “Tercera edad,” –- the third age, as it is called in Spanish. With each year, there are fewer advanced scouts blazing the trail for my life journey.

In Cheryl Minnema’s children’s book, “Hungry Johnny,” a young boy is

taught to allow his elders to eat first.

Elders. Now, there is a term of respect, of endearment, integral to her Ojibwe culture.

Minnema also uses the term, Baby Elder, to identify Johnny’s grandma when she is in the company of even older people.

As a Baby Elder, I do have time for reflection. What does this “st-AGE” of life offer? Where do I find my mentors and role models? Who are the women that have gone before me with grace, humor, conviction and perseverance? What traits do I want to emulate and make my intentional focus?

Hot SUMMER

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Sometimes, there are not words, but images. When I saw this photo of Sylvia Bowman, I simply inhaled. This moment spoke to me. I wanted others to see. My words only get in the way of the experience.

With that, I asked this publication if there was interest in opening my search for what I tagged, “Women in their 90s” to the readers. Do you have a photo of a woman dear to your journey? Maybe an image of her doing a favorite activity, including a piece of advice or a turn of phrase that reveals part of her personality? Women don’t usually add a few years

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Hey Readers!

DO YOU HAVE AN ELDERLY WOMAN IN YOUR LIFE YOU WANT TO LIFT UP AND HONOR?

continued from page 7

Her Voice wants to help you do that.

For possible inclusion in the fall/winter magazine, email high resolution photos, the woman’s name, age and a short quip about them whether it’s something they always say or a piece of advice to delynn. howard@brainerddispatch.com or by mail to Her Voice, Attn: DeLynn Howard, 506 James St., Brainerd, MN 56401.

DEADLINE IS SEPT. 16.

Jan’s book, Northern Shores/ Southern Borders: Revelations of a Bilingual Life, is available at local stores as well as online with Amazon and Barnes and Noble. It just became available as an e-book, so read away! Check out: www.janetkurtz.com and sign up for her free newsletter: LA PLUMA, covering culture north to south.

8 | Her Voice Summer 2022

Doris Anderson was a church choir director and acted in many local plays. She just celebrated her 95th birthday in March. Her daughter, Carla Benjamin, said her mother always says, ““We’ll think of something… and we always do!”

to their age, but if you have a woman you want to lift up that is only in her 80s, that works.

I sincerely want to celebrate these women, our elders. I’ve heard some of them say they don’t feel like they are doing much anymore – a sense of resignation. I believe their very being is a gift. They have more than recipes to share! And, maybe the gift is allowing us to be there with them.

Michelle and her husband, Brent, enjoyed a trip to Yellowstone National Park in 2007 with their children, Rachael and Ben. Contributed

HER FAMILY + road trip

TIPS FOR THE PERFECT FAMILY

BY MICHELLE OIE

Road Trip

“Are we there yet?”

tures going to Montana in 2007 when my son was 6 and my daughter was 5. Our most recent trip was to Florida in 2022.

Thinking about taking the family on a road trip this summer?

Here are our tips for the perfect family road trip.

Over the last 15 years my husband and I have taken our two kids on 17 out-of-state road trips (not including countless weekend and day trips). We started our adven-

TIME OF YEAR When is a good time to go? Choose a time that works for you: school‘s out,

spring break, Grandma wants a visit, fall apple season, Fourth of July music festival or Minnesota Twins baseball spring training.

We usually travel in March during spring break and in the summer. Traveling while the kids were in school was a little messy with getting homework ahead of time and completing it after our return.

Her Voice Summer 2022 | 9

WEATHER If you travel during the winter, weather might be an issue. Check the forecast for the city you are leaving and various locations enroute. Don’t forget to check the forecast for your trip home.

We have adjusted trips based on impending snow storms and have driven through bad weather. It’s best to be aware of what you might encounter.

DESTINATION What kind of traveler are you?

Do you like big cities, quaint small towns, parks or national monuments? Do you want to just explore this great nation and stop wherever you want? Is there a relative or friend to visit?

Sometimes checking an item off your bucket list prompts a family trip. (The Grand Canyon is on my bucket list)!

Does everyone want to go to this destination? If not, help them find something fun they want to do on the trip. When she was younger, my daughter was happy as long as there was a pool. A few years ago I was not excited about my son’s Washington State trip idea. But I went with an open mind and enjoyed the beaches, ferry ride, waterfalls and very tall trees.

MODE OF TRANSPORTATION We drive for a variety of reasons. It’s less expensive to buy gas than to buy four round-trip tickets to Florida in March plus there’s the car rental when you get there.

We often go fishing in Florida and Montana so we pack fishing rods, tackle, beach cart and chairs, sunscreen and the like. If I buy something bulky, it’s nice to just pack it in the car and drive it home… if my husband lets me.

We drive all night since we’ve always had at least two drivers. If needed, we stop and shut our eyes in the car at a rest stop for a couple of hours. If you plan to drive through the night, be sure you have plenty of fresh drivers. There are advantages to driving overnight: kids are asleep, less traffic, semi trucks are off the road, saves

10 | Her Voice Summer 2022

If you will be driving through large cities like Atlanta be sure to time it so you arrive at low traffic times. Keep in mind holidays. We once were parked in traffic on an interstate near Atlanta for three hours because there was a St. Patrick’s Day parade downtown.

There are limitations to driving. If you don’t have the time, patience or physical capability to sit in a car, other modes of transportation might suit you better. My family agreed that the 34-hour, one-way drive to Key Largo, Florida, was too long.

Never again.

Most importantly, make sure your vehicle is in excellent working order before you leave. It would be bad to be stranded on the side of the road at 3 a.m. in the middle of nowhere!

money on a hotel and arrive at your destination sooner.

LODGING A great way to save money on lodging is to stay with somebody you know. They are probably more familiar with the area.

If they are willing to drive, even better.

It’s nice to sit back and have a tour guide. We stay with relatives in Montana.

They know where the fish are biting and which thrift stores have good deals.

If you prefer to stay on your own, there are many options for lodging: vacation rentals, bed and breakfasts, hotels, campgrounds and resorts to name a few.

AMENITIES We’ve always looked for places that offer free food but a complimentary breakfast was necessary for our teenage son. Multiple free breakfasts for a family saves quite a bit of money. Some places offer free cookies, apples or afternoon popcorn. One hotel chain in Texas had free supper food. Not all “complimentary” breakfasts are the same.

Some are just doughnuts and bagels

while others include eggs, sausage, waffles and a whole lot more. Don’t assume each hotel in the same chain offers the same breakfast. I always call the hotel directly to ask what they offer for breakfast. If you call the reservation hotline or book online you are more likely to get incorrect information. A pool, hot tub, gym, workstation or a room with a kitchen might be other amenities that you find handy. We’ve used them all.

Please read reviews. I try not to stay somewhere that has less than a 4 out of 5 star rating. One hotel review in Florida told of cockroaches. We stayed there because other than our minivan there was nowhere else to sleep. After seeing a small cockroach in our first floor room the unsurprised front desk clerk gave us keys to a second floor room. That was better since we only had to put up with sugar ants by the bathroom sink.

Watch out for extra fees and taxes.

I’ve often found good deals only to discover there was a state tax, local tax, sunshine tax, smelly feet tax and cleaning fees so outrageous I considered changing careers.

LOCATION You’ve decided on the destination and when to go, but where do you want to stay? Do you want a place: on the beach, within walking distance to a point of interest, downtown, in a suburb, in a small town outside the big city, or a place near a scenic park, overlook or water feature? Ask yourself what you want to do when you get there. My husband is a fisherman so we often stay near water so he can fish in the morning while I sleep. Do you enjoy falling asleep to the sound of crashing waves or waking up to a beautiful mountain view? It all adds to the vacation experience.

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M Michelle, her husband, Brent, and their children, Ben and an Rachael, enjoyed a family R vacation to Perdido Key, va Florida, in the spring 2022.

Fl Contributed C

LENGTH OF STAY This is the time versus money argument.

Do you need to get home for a commitment? Do you have enough paid time off? Will someone feed the cat, take the dog, plow the driveway and get your mail? These could be extra expenses.

By the way, you can stop the delivery of your mail while you’re gone by contacting the post office.

AN ITINERARY EVERYONE LOVES Before you leave, research what there is to do and how much it costs. Garner feedback from everyone. Categorize activities under: Must do, Maybe, Rainy day and If we have time.

Decide what you plan to do every day. This is important so everyone has something they want to do on the list and there are no disgruntled family members. There were days my daughter and I shopped while my husband and son fished. Visiting Cape Canaveral was awesome for me but my kids were less than enthused. But we all had fun and saw wild armadillos.

As the kids have gotten older there is less demand for every minute to be scheduled. During our last trip to Florida they were both happy to hang out on the beach.

WHAT TO PACK In the car be sure to have: Wet Ones or a moist washcloth in a plastic bag, paper towels, first aid kit and a portable DVD player with DVDs or downloaded movies. Don’t forget blankets, pillows and car chargers for all your devices.

12 | Her Voice Summer 2022

CAR GAMES AND ACTIVITIES When my kids were younger I’d buy new toys and bring them out when I heard “I’m bored.” Lap trays were handy for small puzzles, etc. You can print Travel Bingo cards and use pennies as markers. We still play these games: think of a word that starts with each letter of the alphabet, you say a word then I’ll say the first word that comes to mind, look for alphabet letters on signs, find objects that start with each letter of the alphabet and look for all 50 state license plates. One trip to Florida we got up to 47 states. Don’t forget to play (kid friendly) music that you love since the kids are trapped in the car. They might just grow up to love it. My kids still like Roger Miller.

If possible, take turns sitting up front in the passenger seat. It gives that person now up front a different view of the trip and the person now in the back gets to hang out with “someone new.” Just be sure the designated navigator is up front when needed.

FOOD Be sure to pack everyone’s favorite snacks and some sandwich fixings for the trip there. You can stop for fast food, but it’s not as cheap as it used to be. After arriving at your destination, buy groceries so you can cook meals. We like staying somewhere that has a full kitchen but it’s not always possible. Cooking microwave meals is doable. We once brought our two-burner electric cooktop along. Some places have a charcoal grill. During a one-week vacation in Florida we typically eat out twice for seafood. It’s nice to splurge on extra appetizers and dessert since we save money cooking the rest of the week. Make sure when your son is a teenager you have enough food to feed him. On one trip it took my son three days to tell us that the one meal a day we were eating just was not enough for him.

OTHER TIPS My son’s advice: Have good music. Bring snacks. While on vacation do something you haven’t done before or otherwise wouldn’t do because it makes the trip more memorable.

My daughter’s advice: Make sure the family is close so there won’t be a lot of arguing on the trip. Make sure everyone interacts so it’s not just silent. Do some sightseeing on the way there.

Michelle Oie is a Finding Purpose coach, inspirational speaker, writer and soon-to-be author. Her passion is helping people find their unique life purpose. She loves Jeep Wranglers, peanut butter and hitting all green lights driving through Brainerd. Take The Happiness Quiz and learn more at www.michelleoie.com.

Her Voice Summer 2022 | 13

14 | Her Voice Summer 2022

HER PASSION + music

CELEBRATING 20 YEARS OF

Heart & Soul

BY SUE READY

With a vision and a passion for singing, Sarah Aamot has brought together like-minded people to share their love of music with the community through the Legacy Chorale of Greater Minnesota in the Brainerd lakes area. Sarah is the artistic director and founder.

“They are all ordinary people who come together. As they step through the door,

Sarah Aamot rehearses with the Legacy Chorale.

Aamot recently retired as the artistic director.

Contributed

they leave behind their religion, politics, opinions and regular life. They band together as a collaborative group finding singing feeds their souls. Along the way with rewarding and enriching experiences, friendships are forged as well as numerous networking opportunities emerge,” Sarah said about the group.

Sarah has an impressive resume having

been a director of several choirs, musical director and orchestra conductor since 1987. She has a master’s in music in choral conducting and literature and is currently the vocal music director at Central Lakes College. Sarah has been a choral member with the Minnesota Chorale and the Minnesota Orchestra as well as a chorus member and soloist with The Bach

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Sarah Aamot, middle row, far right, artistic director and founder of the Legacy Chorale of Greater Minnesota, is pictured with original members of the chorale. Photo by Joey Halvorson.

Society of Minnesota and several other music organizations. In addition, she also gives private voice lessons.

In 2001 a small enthusiastic group of 39 including friends from outside the greater lakes area came together to lay the foundation of a multi-community choir in the Brainerd lakes area. Through their efforts, the Legacy Chorale of Greater Minnesota, a nonprofit organization, was instituted in 2002. For two years Sarah commuted from her home in the Twin Cities to Brainerd. In 2003, Sarah moved to the Brainerd lakes area with her then husband. Today post-pandemic, there are a range of 50 to 70 members with the average age of 45-50 who belong, and 14 are 20-year veterans of the chorale.

Sharon Taute, a 20-year veteran of the chorale and part of the group who initially laid the foundation for a chorale music group, is grateful for their friendship. “Through Sarah’s vision and passion for music, she has organized a group of kindred spirits who share her passion and love of music. She has created many rewarding experiences for all.”

Bob Nelson, original manager for 10 years 16 | Her Voice Summer 2022

for the chorale group notes, “Sarah’s vision of creating a chorale affords multiple opportunities for those who want to sing and play wonderful music together.

Sarah’s selection of concert themes and music are one of her strong suits.”

The chorale provides music to numerous Central Lakes communities. They partner with schools and other organizations to enhance vocal music instruction for youths. Young people have an opportunity to participate in the Legacy Chorale performances. Annual scholarships are provided to qualifying high school seniors following chorale guidelines.

The 2021-22 performance season marked the 20th anniversary of the Legacy Chorale of Greater Minnesota. The theme for this season was Celebrations in Song, which was also the title of the chorale’s very first concert series in the fall of 2002. It seemed only fitting for the chorale to conclude such a milestone by circling back to their roots. May 1 was the last concert of the season and the final concert for Sarah, who will be retiring from the Legacy Chorale after 20 years.

Sarah found it a privilege to be a part of the chorale. ‘I have made many lifelong friends among those who love to sing.

Many great moments have been created by the group,” she said.

Some highlights for Sarah the past 20 years include: chorale family members supporting concerts and attending, a 2010 chorale performance at the MN Music Educators Association convention and watching the love of two chorale members blossom as they dated, got married and even had the group sing at their wedding.

For Sarah, the most significant development for the organization has been the creation of the Legacy Chorale School Outreach Program.

The pandemic no doubt has been the chorale’s biggest challenge faced the past two years. Rehearsing and performing with masks, maintaining social distancing and not having in-person concerts required a lot of adjustments among the members, forcing the group to be innovative. Pandemic funds were used to purchase new equipment. This allowed for live streaming concerts and reached more members’ families who were over-

“I feel so blessed to have been a part of this group. I am excited to see where new leadership will take the group,” Sarah said.

Contributed

seas. Sarah said, “Virtual concerts were 10 times more work than a regular concert, but well worth the effort to keep the chorale a viable entity in the community.”

Health issues are one of the factors for Sarah to step aside and hand over the reins to a new director. “I feel so blessed to have been a part of this group. I am excited to see where new leadership will take the group. Last summer I was heartened by the number of young people auditioning. They are the wave of the future for our group.

Looking ahead I am hoping a more diverse and ethnic group will develop.”

Sarah hopes to continue her work at CLC and work in some capacity with the Legacy Chorale. She looks forward to pursuing her digital photography interest and hopefully travel more. But her top priority now will be spending more time with family.

Music is the heart and soul of Sarah and her work.

Sue Ready is a freelance writer, poet, food writer, book reviewer and former middle school teacher. She is a member of the Northwoods Arts Council in Hackensack and one of the chairs for the Annual August Northwoods Art and Book Festival. Sue blogs at http://sockfairies. blogspot.com with recipes, up north living and travel adventures. Her book reviews are posted on Facebook under EverReady Book Reviews and on her blog

Sarah found it a privilege to be a part of the chorale. ‘I have made many lifelong friends among those who love to sing. Many great moments have been created by the group,” she said. Photo by Joey Halvorson.

*LYLQJ <RX 7KH 3RZHU 7R 3RZHU

Her Voice Summer 2022 | 17

MICKEY’S PIZZA WELCOMES A

third generation

BY SHEILA DECHANTAL PHOTOS BY JOEY HALVORSON

Grace Czeczok grew up around the amazing scents of fresh bread, pepperoni, onions and the joy of family.

Mickey’s Pizza was established in 1982 by Grace’s grandfather, Mickey, and grandmother, Pat. Originally the restaurant was located at 823 Washington Street in Brainerd and had been called Pizza Factory for about a year until it was discovered that was already a name of a pizza place. Mickey then changed the name to what we all know it as now, Mickey’s Pizza and Subs.

The new name reflected they were more than just pizza. In 1989, Mickeys Pizza and Subs moved to its current location at 417 S. Fifth Street, Brainerd.

Grace recalls her own parents, Jim and Toni, helped out with the business when it was under her grandparents reign. Grace jokes her father came in to help one day in 1984 when someone called in sick, and he never left. Toni, Grace’s mom, was involved in retirement planning until she too found herself more and more involved in Mickey’s. In 2005, Jim and Toni stepped into the ownership of the restaurant.

Grace recalls the early years fondly. Along with her older brother, Jack, she would hang out in the restaurant at a young age. Grace remembers just wanting to help. “I remember being 7 or 8 years old and running around the restaurant or hanging from the counter by my arms,” she laughs. “I would wipe tables and take on small projects like that.”

In high school both Jack and Grace worked at Mickey’s. Eventually Jack moved and started his career, and Grace moved to Minneapolis to continue her schooling. “I never planned to come back to Brainerd,” Grace said. “I was fresh out of high school and had no plans of coming back, let alone taking over the family business. She had seen how hard it had been for her family during the 2008 recession and did not feel this would be part of her future.

Grace worked in finances and with the Timberwolves for a time. She assisted 18 | Her Voice Summer 2022

with Player Specific Stats. She enjoyed what she did, but deep down felt that something was missing and that she was not being challenged enough. In 2021, that changed.

During a visit from her mom, Grace was approached with the offer to come back to Brainerd and eventually take over Mickey’s Pizza and Subs.

“Mom suggested that perhaps I come back and try it for a year – no commitment – but see if it might be a fit. I had just bought a house. The timing was not perfect, yet I was compelled by the offer,” Grace shares.

“Mom suggested I think about it for 24 hours and I did. The next morning, I woke up and I knew this is something I wanted to do. The first person I told was my brother Jack and he was thrilled.”

Grace was able to rent out her home in Minneapolis to her cousins. She then came back to Brainerd and started working in the restaurant in April of 2021. That was the start of her one year trial to see if this would be a decision she would want to make. In April of 2022 – Grace said yes.

Grace is enjoying being back among the scents and voices of her childhood. The buzz of the restaurant as it comes to life each day makes her smile. She is still learning every day.

She added a few subs to the menu nu u– –- Big Walter, The Warrior, and Chezy’s y’s Cuban are her contributions to the currentt menu. menu Full ownership transfer is still four or five years away. Grace’s grandparents and parents are still highly involved in the restaurant. Grandpa Mickey comes in about three times a week, Grace said. He likes to work the counter and take orders. It’s very social for him. Grandma still helps as well; she assists with the soup and wrapping of sandwiches. Dad can often be found at the counter as well as helping fill orders and Mom is everywhere. To this day, there are still times you can walk into the restaurant and find all five of them there, and for this, Grace is so thankful.

Sheila DeChantal is an event coordinator, freelance writer and adventure seeker. She loves to plan and execute events that benefit our community. Sheila is the Friends of the Brainerd Public Library president, secretary on the City Library Board and vice president of Camp Benedict, a camp for those infected and affected by the AIDS virus. You can find her writing about life and books at bookjourney.net. In her free time, she enjoys biking, hiking, campfires, time with family and friends and snuggling up to her new grandbaby, Kylie.

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HER CAREER + pizza

Toni Czeczok, left, and her daughter, Grace Czeczok, work side by side making pizzas. Grace expects to take ownership as the third generation of her family.

HER HER HEALING HEALING

THE CALL OF THE

+ nature + connection

Wild

BY CANDICE ZIMMERMANN

No one can deny the mysterious and magnetic powers of nature. After a long winter, the call of the loon sends tickles down your spine as it announces the sun coming up at dawn. A simple stroll through a misty woodland path releases tension in your shoulders with each step.

And as children, who didn’t lie on a soft patch of grass and gaze at the clouds in the sky as we let our imaginations take hold?

Nature’s power has a unique hold we often deny ourselves as human beings.

However, each one of us has a unique relationship to nature and for some, there is a deeper, more intimate connection that allows for healing and personal growth. For Peg Serani, a Baxter resident with sage-like wisdom and a contagious smile, her lifelong courtship with Mother Nature began at an early age.

“In nature, everything melts away. Nature has no clock so don’t be in a hurry and learn from what you see,” said Peg. She hopes by sharing her story, more women will be empowered to create their own unique connection to nature.

Contributed

Listening to Peg’s story was like curling up on the couch with a good book and a cup of tea. She told her story with an air of wisdom and gratitude toward our natural world. Peg grew up on the outskirts of St. Cloud, Minnesota, the fourth in a lineup of eight siblings that included four brothers and three sisters. She laughed as she described how she took advantage of the quiet wilderness just to escape her noisy siblings. Her calling was the bog behind their home, alive with the songs of frogs and toads, and filled with new life every time she visited.

It wasn’t until she was grown and raising a family of her own that she realized her connection to nature was more than just a hobby. She belonged there.

Peg admitted her life was often busy and she didn’t always have time to visit the wild as much as she desired. Life, after all, is funny like that. We often sacrifice

When asked what she loves about nature, Peg said, “It keeps me young and curious. I believe that being in nature has made me a stronger, more resilient person.” Contributed the things we need most in the pursuit of societal norms. Once settled into the Brainerd lakes area, Peg found a plethora of outdoor activities and she said that call of the wild returned to her like it did when she was a little girl.

When asked why she desires it so much, she said, “It keeps me young and curious.

I believe that being in nature has made me a stronger, more resilient person.” The twinkle in her eye confirmed she believed this with the deepest amount of integrity.

Peg also disclosed nature had been an important aspect of healing when going through some of the toughest times in her life, especially during the loss of her loved ones. “Just being a part of something bigger than myself has gotten me through. My church is outside.

It is a reminder my loved ones are in a beautiful place.”

I was fortunate enough to visit Peg’s home last summer and observe the beautiful garden sanctuary she has made for herself in her backyard. The combination of sights, sounds and smells of this little oasis, complete with koi pond and waterfall, is a masterpiece. It is clear Peg, a Master Naturalist and true nature-lover,

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Her Voice Summer 2022 | 21

22 | Her Voice Summer 2022

is authentically and beautifully in love with all the Earth has to offer, and in turn, it has given her the gift of healing and empowerment.

Peg believes nature has been an important aspect of healing in some of the toughest times in her life, especially during the loss of her loved ones. “Just being a part of something bigger than myself has gotten me through. My church is outside. It is a reminder my loved ones are in a beautiful place,” she said.

Her story begs to question: what is my own unique connection to nature? How do I nurture it with my own children? In a world filled with overwhelming technological stimulation, how does our society begin to heal?

Peg’s advice: “In nature, everything melts away. Nature has no clock so don’t be in a hurry and learn from what you see.” She hopes by sharing her story, more women will be empowered to create their own unique connection to nature. In a time when deadlines loom, email alerts are never ending and stress is unavoidable, nature is there to heal you. Listen to her call and take time to enjoy the wonders around you.

For a list of greenspaces in the Brainerd lakes area, visit the Nature Network on Facebook @naturenetworkbla.

Candice Zimmermann is the current director of the Northland Arboretum and a creative soul inspired by the outdoors. Her happy place is on a dock or porch at sunrise with a cup of coffee in hand.

Candice and her husband are raising two beautiful kids and a handful of crazy critters on their hobby farm south of Brainerd.

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HER STORY

+ transformation

Coming out of the

DARKNESS

BY SHEILA HELMBERGER

T

here is so much good in my life now I couldn’t even ask for a better life.” - Charly Niesen

Charly Niesen lives with her family in a nice neighborhood in Baxter. She and her husband have four children together. Toxic relationships and addiction when she was young cost her the custody of three of her children, but today she is living the life she used to only dream about.

Growing up in Little Falls, the youngest of three girls, Charly thought she had a pretty normal childhood. “I didn’t realize everyone else wasn’t going to a treatment facility to see their parent,” she says of visits with her father who was in and out of rehabilitation for drug use in Brainerd.

“My mom always tried to make things as normal as possible. She would pack a picnic for us, and we

24 | Her Voice Summer 2022

would love to go to the lion drinking fountain there,” Charly said.

By 14 or 15 years old, she started running away, skipping school and stealing cars. “I was taking this whole path to try to find my place in the chaos of our family,” she said. “Negative attention was better than no attention. I went from being the golden child to the child that was defiant and in and out of court and placement.”

During a stay at the Central Minnesota Regional Detention Center, she met a boy and 17-year-old Charly learned she was pregnant. On another trip to the detention center while he was doing time in a connected jail annex, she told him through a window they were going to have a baby.

Charly is writing a book on her journey to sobriety and happiness that she hopes to publish next year. She wants it to help others realize no matter how dark it looks, there is always hope to come out of that darkness.

Contributed

Her Voice Summer 2022 | 25

She says she started to dream about the nice home they would all live in together and the family they would become.

The couple moved in with another couple and one of her boyfriend’s friends while she was pregnant. Charly took parenting classes. Her boyfriend was working but had started drinking a lot, and when he went to jail on a DUI, she learned he had been cheating on her with their roommate’s girlfriend.

She had her son, Zackery, in July of 2000 at Essentia Health. The two settled alone into an apartment downtown and she went back to school. When she ran into Zackery’s father at the county fair he started visiting and told her part of the reason he had left was because of the amount of weight she had gained while she was pregnant. He told her he had something that would help her with the weight and give the new mom more energy, too.

“That night I used meth for the first time,” she says. Within three weeks she was using every day. “I lost the weight,” she admits, “but I lost everything else, too. I lost my will to parent, to go to school and I lost my apartment.” Her son went to live with his paternal grandparents.

When Charly was evicted, she moved in with friends. She was stealing to survive and went from snorting and smoking meth to IV use.

She was in lockup when she learned she was pregnant by her new boyfriend and spent the first six months of her second pregnancy in jail.

When her son Damion was a week old, Charly’s father came to meet his grandson. He commented on the amount of weight she had put on while pregnant the second time. She convinced herself if she didn’t snort or smoke the drugs, it would be okay to use again. She relapsed and when her parole officer showed up for a visit one day, she found Charly passed out on the floor of the porch with the baby.

Charly Niesen kisses her 12-year-old daughter, Joslyn, on the forehead. Contributed.

When Charly was at her lowest, she met a person who would help her turn her life around. “Kimberly Pilgrim is very much a key part of my success story,” says Charly. She ran a displaced homemaker’s program and held a small parenting support group on Oak Street in Brainerd. “When I met Kimberly, she was kind and authentic. She started showing up at other meetings to support me. She saw something in me that I never saw in myself.” Charly was working hard to be reunited with her son and was meeting with up to 11 professionals a week.

“I’d like to say this is where I stayed sober, but it’s not.”

Reunited with Damion’s father, who was currently sober, Charly learned she was pregnant for the third time. When Kaija, her daughter, was born, they spent a month in a foster home together, but Charly had to make the heartbreaking decision to give up parental rights to her son, in order to keep her daughter.

“Nobody was talking about mental health back then,” she says, “I was depressed and sad all of the time. I started missing my appointments.” She also started to use again. On a call with her social worker, Charly, not knowing what else to do, said someone should get her daughter from her. She agreed it was for the best to give up parental rights to Kaija, but when the court date arrived, she couldn’t bring herself to go through the door for the hearing. Her rights were terminated involuntarily. She learned she wouldn’t be able to keep another baby if she got pregnant again.

26 | Her Voice Summer 2022

Charly, her oldest son, Zackery, 21, and son, Dylen, 15, went to a Twins game for Zackery’s golden birthday. Contributed

Charly met Brandon when they were both in jail. The two used together initially, but five months into their relationship, Brandon told her he wanted to get sober.

They did it together and Charly was sober to stay at 24 years old.

Three months into their sobriety Charly learned she and Brandon were expecting a baby together. They decided they would do whatever they needed to do to keep it. She called Kimberly, who said she couldn’t promise her anything, but would stand beside her. “A lot of key players started stepping up to support me.

Some of the people who had fought against me started fighting for me.”

“We’re 16 1/2 years sober. I am a mother of seven. I want all of my kids to know I did love them; I didn’t love myself. When they are old enough, I want them to read my success story and not my obituary.

“Every day I work to be a better version of myself,” says Charly. She and Brandon have been married for 10 years. “My husband had a past. I had a past. We just kept looking forward. We’re two imperfect people who have never given up on one another.”

Charly got her GED and went on to more schooling.

Today she is a recovery specialist at Essentia Health.

“To be able to support and give back to the people here is huge,” she said. She is writing a book on her journey to sobriety and happiness that she hopes to publish next year. She wants it to help others realize no matter how dark it looks, there is always hope to come out of that darkness.

Charly and her husband, Brandon, are 16 1/2 years sober. Contributed

“They say everything happens for a reason. There is so much good in my life now I couldn’t even ask for a better life. I know I don’t ever have to go back there, but I don’t forget where I came from.”

Sheila Helmberger lives in the Brainerd area and is a frequent contributor to Her Voice.

Her Voice Summer 2022 | 27

FOR HER

+ motherhood

My Mother’s

MISSION

BY THERESA JARVELA

28 | Her Voice Summer 2022

“Mom and I were bird watching from her deck when VKH FRQĆGHG LQ PH WKH XQWKLQNDEOH KDG KDSSHQHG A chipmunk (aka Alvin) had friended her. After her confession and almost on cue, Alvin darted across the deck, hopped onto my foot and scurried up my leg, then jumped onto Mom’s lap,” Theresa recalled Regardless of the falling temperature, I decided to go. And so it was on a cold day in January that I arrived in Pine River, my hometown, and was greeted by mom and the aroma of freshly baked bread. I followed her into the kitchen where it was cozy and warm and made myself comfortable at the table.

Fire crackled in the old wood cook stove as Mom poured tea and sliced warm bread.

She sat down, buttered a healthy portion for me, and passed it along with a jar of homemade raspberry jam. (Although she had a conventional oven she loved baking in her wood cook stove.)

I slathered jam on top of the melted butter and gazed out the window. “I see they’ve invited their neighbors.” I smiled to myself, knowing those were fighting words.

For years, my mother had been on a mission and had no plans to quit until she completed it. They messed with her friends and she planned to stop them one way or another. With a gleam in her eye she announced, “I’m gonna fix ‘em this time!”

Yeah, she was ready to talk.

“How are you going to do it?” I asked and wiped a bit of jam from the side of my mouth.

“Screen,” she replied. As her plans began to unfold, my eyes strayed toward the window. Bird houses and feeders of various shapes and sizes could be seen among the trees my father had planted decades earlier. And there in the midst of them all, in full view of my mother, the enemy dangled upside down from her finch feeder.

Brazen creature, I thought. But they had to eat, too, didn’t they? (I suppose I would have been more understanding about her dilemma if we had the same problem with critters at our house, but we didn’t.)

“...and I know this time I’ll fool ‘em good!” she said as three more squirrels scampered across the snow and up into the feeders, chasing away her feathered friends.

My mother always had a plan to outfox the enemy but it seemed those squirrels and chipmunks usually got the best of her.

I remember one idea that backfired. On someone’s advice she greased the supporting pole of a feeder in order to prevent those rascals from climbing to the top. Shortly after, and to her horror, she discovered a bird hanging from the pole, its wing stuck fast.

She rescued the bird and pulled the plug on that idea but by the next time I saw her, she had another plan of action in the works.

Would her mission ever succeed?

Months later on a fine summer day, Mom and I were bird watching from her deck when she confided in me the unthinkable had happened. A chipmunk (aka Alvin) had friended her. After her confession and almost on cue, Alvin darted across the deck, hopped onto my foot and scurried up my leg, then jumped onto Mom’s lap.

I chuckled to myself and thought about her predicament. Friended by a chipmunk and guilty of consorting with the enemy!

Yes, she was in a pickle.

On my next visit, I found Mom sitting on the deck with a pellet gun on her lap. I knew why she had armed herself so I asked, “How do you think Alvin’s going to feel if he finds out you’re gunning for his relatives?”

Nothing like a guilt trip to save a life.

In the end I never witnessed my mother firing that gun. I know she never completed her mission. And as for Alvin, I was told he had been killed by a car one weekend when my mother wasn’t home. No one ever told her.

Some time after Mom passed away, I began seeing rodents hanging around our yard and in our bird feeders. Word must have spread that we were ripe for the picking so I took up the torch my mother had carried for so many years and prepared for invasions.

Now when the days are warm, I sit in my gazebo and watch birds flit from branch to branch. They play in the bird bath and land on the feeders. The squirrels and chipmunks run along the fence prowling for food. I chase them away but understand they have to eat, too.

When the weather turns cold, I watch my feathered friends from inside the house and keep guard over the feeders. McKayla and Snickers, our canines, take positions by the bay window where they, too, keep an eye out for those bright-eyed and bushy-tailed creatures. And since those creatures are faster than they are, I sometimes let them out to chase the chubby rascals away. But I’m not heartless for I know they’ll be up the trees long before our dogs can catch them.

Mom often asked, “I wonder if there are birds in heaven?” I don’t know the answer to that but if there are birds in heaven, there just might be squirrels and chipmunks, too. However, for now and until I can answer that question, I’ll carry the torch and continue the fight for the woman who bravely took on the enemy, fought the battles, but lost the war.

Theresa Jarvela, freelancer and author of the cozy mystery series, “Tales of a Tenacious Housesitter,” makes her home in Brainerd, Minnesota.

Her Voice Summer 2022 | 29

HER HEALTH

+ tapping

Licensed psychologist Bryn Lowrie Yahn became interested in energy healing and studied different techniques such as mindfulness meditation as she cared for her mother who fought a brave battle against cancer for seven years.

30 | Her Voice Summer 2022

Tapping Nearly 20% of all Americans suffer from anxiety disorders. That translates into approximately 40 million people nationwide dealing with intense, excessive worry on a daily basis. Although the intensity can change from time to time and slides along a scale, fears about everyday situations can make life all but unbearable for some individuals.

Fortunately, anxiety and a number of other issues can be helped through a therapy called Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) or tapping. This treatment has been found to be an effective, evidence-based practice for several issues including anxiety, pain, depression, phobias and posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

HEALING THROUGH ENERGY There are few things more life changing than caring for a parent during their last days of life. Such was the case for licensed psychologist Bryn Lowrie Yahn as she cared for her mother who fought a brave battle against cancer

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for seven years. During this time she became interested in energy healing and studied different techniques such as mindfulness meditation. After receiving training, she worked with students in high school and middle school as well as adult clients and taught these techniques.

In 2020, Yahn’s mother was losing her battle with cancer.

“I was fortunate enough to be with her during that process. So, watching her go through that dying process and of course her dying got me thinking about the world of energy. We are energy beings, so I became curious about what happens when people die. It sent me on a big quest and changed me in all sorts of ways. So, I looked into energy healing.”

As a result, Yahn became certified in EFT or “tapping.”

This technique involves tapping on certain energy points on the upper body while at the same time focusing on particular issues.

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We all have emotions and sometimes they get stuck in our body and become blocked. “We don’t have time to process and properly discharge every emotion from every experience we’ve had so things get stuck,” said Yahn. “Tapping helps to unblock the energy and gets it moving again. It directly calms the amygdala, stress center of the brain, so that it can relax. As that happens, anxiety gets reduced.”

It is not surprising to learn that emotional problems are layered within the psyche. Tapping helps peel back the layers so the individual can get to the root of the problem. It opens the unconscious part of our brain often revealing a matrix of underlying issues. These issues can go as far back as childhood. The connection between certain subconscious issues and current anxiety is often surprising.

Tapping has been shown to be effective more quickly than traditional talk therapy. “That’s what I love about it,” said Yahn, “I’ll be working with somebody and after a few sessions we’ll have a really pivotal session where they’ll really get to a core issue and I’ll think, ‘Wow, that would have taken me about a year in talk therapy with them!’

Because, you know, talk therapy works with the conscious part of our brain but there’s a lot swirling around in that unconscious part that drives our behaviors and our feelings and how we are functioning right now.”

RELIEF FROM PAIN, ANXIETY, DEPRESSION AND MORE Past trauma can be pushed into the unconscious part of the brain and while you may believe you have handled the issue, it is still there affecting your life on a regular basis. Tapping is a safe as well as powerful way to work with trauma.

Unlike talk therapy which often brings up the feelings of the trauma, tapping addresses the issues effectively while you maintain a certain emotional distance. Yahn explains, “You can go back to the traumatic memory, and you don’t have to relive it. You can go back, and you don’t change the memory obviously because it happened, but you can change how that memory is encoded in your body. You can change how you feel about that memory, the messages you have internalized from that trauma. You can change all of that and really heal.”

EFT is effective with all types of pain, including physical pain. There are often emotional components behind the physical pain. Tapping can help with physical pain when nothing else has worked. This technique has been helpful in reducing the pain of fibromyalgia and other chronic pain disorders. It has also been used in the treatment of chronic fatigue.

Yahn has also used this therapy to help individuals move through the grief and loss process. “Grief is so heavy and so strong,” says Yahn, “that the tapping helps move it through the system and helps people release it better, so they feel lighter.”

For more information about the benefits of EFT, visit brynlowrie.com.

32 | Her Voice Summer 2022

%U\Q LV FHUWLĆHG LQ (PRWLRQDO )UHHGRP 7HFKQLTXHV RU “tapping.” This technique involves tapping on certain energy points on the upper body while at the same time focusing on particular issues as illustrated here with her client, Kathy.

Susan J. Smith-Grier, mother, grandmother, writer, storyteller, blogger, and Reading Corps tutor of early elementary kids, enjoys the changing seasons of Minnesota lake country. She lives for those moments when the possibilities light up the eyes of her awesome school kids and delights in the power of words and story.

“Tapping helps to unblock the energy and gets it moving again. It directly calms the amygdala, stress center of the brain, so that it can relax. As that happens, anxiety gets reduced,” Bryn explained.

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HER CLUBS + books

THE BEST

Book Club EVER

BY CAROLYN CORBETT

BY CAROLYN CORBETT The Best Book Club Ever? Really? Yup! In 2017, when two women from the Nisswa area wanted to start a book club, they decided each would invite a friend to Stonehouse for coffee and see what happened. What happened was the Best Book Club Ever, a group of pickleball-playing, community-volunteering, retired women who love to read.

The cast of characters include: Ann Beaver, Arla Johnson, Betsy Egan, Catherine McGoldrick, Claire Faust, Donn Beaubien, Joey Halvorson, Maureen Farnsworth and Susan Mezzenga.

The Best Book Club Ever (BBCE) is a diverse group of individuals. Book selections feature a rich mix of authors, subject matter and genres. Everyone

34 | Her Voice Summer 2022

is dedicated to reading the books. Members can express conflicting opinions and allow that disagreement to be there.

“This book club,” said Betsy, “consists of very intelligent ladies who are extremely well read. We are from all kinds of backgrounds. No one is afraid to give their honest opinion about a book or author and we don’t feel intimidated.”

Susan agreed. “We are a full-disclosure group. The women contribute. They’re thoughtful. They come prepared for the discussion.” “I like the people,” Donn said. “I like their personalities, the diversity and the harmony. No one is judged.”

I

like their personalities, the diversity and the harmony. No one is judged. - Donn Beaubien

Arla has enjoyed developing fresh connections with these interesting women.

Claire found that reading, especially these past two COVID years, has become very important to her. Having this personal contact with this club and these women now helps a lot.

Donn brought a system to BBCE whereby books are rated 1 to 5. Five is awesome; one is not. At the beginning of the meeting, each member tells briefly how they rate the book and why. After the group discussion, each rates the book again.

People may not change their rating, but they all have new insights and a different perspective after the discussion.

Members are introduced to books they likely wouldn’t otherwise read. Arla finds

everyone is willing to try whatever, even if they’ve heard questionable reviews.

Their February selection, “The Book of Longings” by Sue Monk Kidd, sparked an unusually wide range of discussion. Joey couldn’t swallow the idea Jesus married a woman and rated the book a two.

Ann often ranks books she reads outside the book club as three and a half. Since pluses and minuses aren’t used in BBCE, she often ranks books a three. She tells the group, “I’m open to moving up. Convince me.” Her husband notices the difference between BBCE and Ann’s Minneapolis book club. The Minneapolis group is composed of former foreign language teaching colleagues — people with fairly similar life experiences. He is impressed with the diversity of characters, life experiences and opinions of the BBCE members.

in-person gatherings resume, she obviously can’t participate. She’s tried talking to people in Hawaii about starting a book club. The women ask, “You actually talk about books?” That’s not the case with this book group. “These women are avid readers and active book club members,” said Joey. “Counting the Best Book Club Ever, the women participate in 21 book clubs.”

There are “millions” of traditional turn-thepages books in Joey’s book room at home, but she especially loves audiobooks. She listens while painting her house, shoveling snow, raking the yard and in the car.

Susan also listens to lots of audiobooks.

Audible is sometimes the tipping point for her in rating the books, since readers now are very talented. Their performance can create an even greater sense of intimacy with the story.

Members make every effort to attend. When off camping, Catherine tries to link up online. Some campgrounds have internet connections, but she has also gone to local libraries. “I love visiting small town libraries and big ones too,” she said. “As a result, we have visited many Carnegie libraries.”

Catherine got an early start on book clubs.

During the 50s and 60s, her mother was in Great Books. When the kids were in 4th-6th grades, their mom subscribed to a club that mailed each of them a book every other month. Catherine remembers how cool it was to get a book in the mail just for her.

Maureen, who moved to Hawaii several years ago, loves when the group meets via Zoom. However, when COVID recedes and

As a child, Ann would ride her bike a mile through South Minneapolis to the bookmobile. Later, between getting her

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bachelor’s, her master’s and teaching French, there was little time for personal reading. Then, during a yearly teacher evaluation, Ann was asked to set a personal goal as well as professional goals. She chose reading for pleasure.

In Louisiana, where Donn grew up, the library was only open to Black people for certain hours — typically Saturday mornings. Therefore, the books that were truly available for her to read came from the library at the Catholic school she attended.

In high school, Claire read “Karen”, a nonfiction book about a child with Cerebral Palsy. A physical therapist in the book developed a treatment which at that time was very innovative.

Claire went on to become a physical therapist herself.

Though Betsy was labeled in school with reading comprehension difficulties, it didn’t stop her from getting a master’s degree in nursing or coming to love books. Her interest in reading picked up about 15 years ago. “Since I

Favorite Books It was challenging for the BBCE women to choose a favorite from among the 59 books read since the club’s first selection, “Being Mortal” by Atul Gawande,” Susan said. “Picking a favorite book seems almost sacrilegious.

So many rate high on my list.” Ann agreed. “We have read so many great books that choosing just one was next to impossible for me.” Here are the choices they made.

retired six years ago, I can’t get enough to read,” she said.

As a beginning reader, Maureen’s earliest books were the Beatrix Potter books about Frog & Toad and Peter Rabbit. Later, Maureen enjoyed reading books in English class and writing papers on them. She liked delving into their deeper meaning and symbolism.

And that is what she and the others continue to do through the Best Book Club Ever.

CLAIRE FAUST “The Book of Joy: Lasting Happiness in a Changing World” by Douglas Abrams

ANN BEAVER

Interviews with the Dali Lama and Desmond Tutu. “I read this book before the beginning of the pandemic and return to the question it tried to answer many times during this dark time: ‘How do we find joy in the face of life’s inevitable suffering?’”

“This Tender Land” by William Kent Krueger

DONN BEAUBIEN

“I learned much about life in the Upper Midwest during the Great Depression and the many positive ways people found to adapt, survive and help each other. Krueger’s research shows!”

“The Nightingale” by Kristen Hannah

ARLA JOHNSON

Isabelle finds a clever way to outsmart the Germans in wartorn France during WWII. “The power and commitment of a young girl or mature young woman to make a difference resonates with me. I enjoy books that manifest the strength and resilience of the female character.”

“West With Giraffes” by Lynda Rutledge

JOEY HALVORSON

A young boy who lost all his family to the dust bowl conditions jumps a train to New York where two giraffes transported from Africa are being readied to head to the San Diego zoo. “Heartwarming and educational.

Rutledge’s characters are so well developed and believable that I actually became young Odie O’Bannion, the main character and narrator of the story.”

“The Great Alone” by Kristin Hannah

BETSY EGAN “Four Winds” by Kristin Hannah Because of the dust bowl during the Depression in the Midwest, families had to decide between giving up their land to move west or staying put. “I like books that get into my soul and “Four Winds” haunts me.”

CATHERINE MCGOLDRICK “Killers of the Flower Moon” by David Grann This narrative nonfiction book addresses a 1920s chapter in American history when powerful and bigoted whites murdered dozens of Osage Indians for access to their valuable shares of oil money.

36 | Her Voice Summer 2022

A former POW comes home from Vietnam a different man who decides to move his family to Alaska to live off the grid. “Kristen Hannah’s books grab me. She makes me feel that I am her characters.”

MAUREEN FARNSWORTH “Where the Crawdads Sing” by Delia Owens Kya is left to raise herself in the marshes of North Carolina when her family abandons her at a young age.

“The words and characters came alive and seeped into my heart and soul. When the book ended, I remember closing the cover and thinking it was a really good book, as if I had just finished a wonderful meal.”

SUSAN MEZZENGA “Becoming” by Michelle Obama “I always love a story of a resilient woman. I am unabashedly in love with Michelle, her class, her leadership, her beauty – well, just everything about her.

Listening to her tell her own story in this memoir was beyond satisfying.”

CLAIRE FAUST

JOEY HALVORSON

MAUREEN FARNSWORTH

ANN BEAVER

BETSY EGAN

DONN BEAUBIEN

CATHERINE MCGOLDRICK

ARLA JOHNSON

SUSAN MEZZENGA

Carolyn Corbett, wrote her first magazine stories during the five years she spent sailing the Bahamas. Back ashore, she continued freelancing and has over 250 articles published in various regional and national magazines. Carolyn was the professional English and writing tutor at CLC for 3 1/2 years. She loves cats, laughter, lattes and playing with words.

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CH CHURCH CHUR BASEM BA E BASEMENT LADIES LAD LA D and the an

Changing CChan n Times

HER HISTORY + awareness

E

ach woman will pay yearly dues to the ‘Society’ plus 5¢ per meeting unless she was absent, then she was charged 10¢.”

- Ladies Aid rule listed in the church minutes in 1878

in the day, they gathered in church basements, sleeves rolled up, aprons on, hands turning out pasties for fundraisers, bars for funerals, coffee for after church social hours, and set tables for potlucks that didn’t require an occasion. When they surfaced from the basement, they sat in the pews while men worked as ushers, deacons and ministers. In the day, they took their husband’s entire name at marriage and tacked “Mrs.” in front, resulting in lost identities to future generations.

Like today, at the time of this writing, when my project is to go through boxes of loose photos piecing together their stories for the celebration of the 150th anniversary of the First Congregational UCC in Brainerd this summer.

I lift another photo from the collection, flip it over and read, “Mrs. Don Turnquist,” grateful that she is part of my collective memory. It is my task to label names and dates as best I can from past church directories, programs and now email inquiries to members that date their attendance back to the 1960s. This group of “baby elders” — those between ages 70-80 –- are the “memory keepers” of what is now our church history.

A scanned image of a page in the “What’s Cookin’?” cookbook from the First Congregational United Church of Christ, published in 1993.

Contributed

I add the name “Betty” to the photo and recall her inviting me to a Women’s Fellowship meeting when I first moved to town in the early 1980s. It was a time of change for Betty’s generation of Church Basement Ladies who met in the afternoons to plan church suppers, distribute food to the shut-ins, do the spring cleaning and serve sweet treats with strong coffee. Betty was on the cusp of change, introducing me to Lilja, Sharon, Karen, Sue, Itty, Judy, and yes, another Jan, using their first names.

Around this time, change was also filtering into churches through something called inclusive speech, whereby the masculine pronouns of patriarchal influence were debated and eventually shed. Changing “Father” to “God” was accepted more readily in the basement, but Betty took it upstairs to the sanctuary when 38 | Her Voice Summer 2022

she donated a full set of New Century Hymnals in memory of her husband, Don. Traditional hymns took on inclusive pronouns and new hymns were introduced, a change no longer noticed.

Within the United Church of Christ, women had an equal vote beginning in 1852 with the chartering of the first Union Church.

Those women formed sewing circles raising enough money to purchase property, build the meeting hall and subsidize the pastor’s wages. They also focused on the community work of teaching English to the incoming immigrants — think Norwegian, German, and Polish newcomers.

Locally, the Brainerd First Congregational United Church of Christ dates its women’s organization to Aug. 13, 1872. The

Church Basement Ladies from the 80s pictured from left to right: Althea Peterson, 0LOGUHG 0F.HQ]LH $LOHHQ $FNHUVRQ &HFLO 2OVRQ 9LUJLQLD 1\JDDUG DQG (YHO\Q $DVH

Ladies Aid officially formed in 1878 with this rule recorded in church minutes: “Each woman will pay yearly dues to the ‘Society’ plus 5¢ per meeting unless she was absent, then she was charged 10¢.”

Ponder that!

By 1933, they changed their name to the Women’s Fellowship, growing to four distinct groups. They flourished until the 1970s, when many women pursued careers outside of the home, thus limiting their availability to attend afternoon meet-

ings and take on lengthy volunteer projects. Despite adding babysitting services to cover some church meetings, energy was also a factor!

The decline in Women’s Fellowship attendance did not mean a loss of women’s

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activism in church life. Historically, women have always been involved, but the 1970s’ focus changed from his-story to “her-story” –- thanks in part to the Women’s Movement and aforementioned inclusive language. Quietly or intentionally, the Church Basement Ladies headed upstairs to become ushers, serve communion, read the scriptures, and –- heaven forbid –- become pastors.

When the Rev. George Steffen retired, it fell on the search committee to find a replacement. The minutes record the trepidation (of a woman, no less), that the church would call a woman pastor.

Ironically since that day, our pastors have included the Rev. Estelle Pettit, the Rev. Mary Kay Sauter, the Rev. Linda Crowe (all interims), the Rev. Deb Celley, and currently, the Rev. Leslie Moughty.

Meanwhile, the Church Basement Ladies took their customary roles to a global awareness level. In the 1980s, concerns about hunger, poverty, appropriate agriculture and environmental issues were lifted up in Adult Forums, state conferences and local presentations. Starting in the church kitchen, Styrofoam cups were out and recycling was in.

Garden Gleaning, the practice of bringing in excess produce on Sundays for the taking, began. Environmental action notes, now called “Green Tips,” showed up in the bulletins. And, where did that coffee and sugar we served come from anyway?

Was that purchase linked to the workers and wars in Central America?

There was no turning back. And, that is a good thing.

The Women’s Fellowship, as an entity, dissolved into an array of inclusive small groups. It turns out that some men like to cook and some women are great carpenters. With the guidance of the Rev. Mary Kay, we began to grow into our natural talents. Instead of the Church Basement Ladies, a “Cooking for Everyone” group emerged, inviting all to cook and eat, and yes, fundraise. Their five de mayo fiesta, Fall Harvest feasts, and international banquets sell out.

Linda Tossey, left, Lowell Johnson and Jim Newgord are part RI D ê&RRNLQJ IRU (YHU\RQHë JURXS DW WKH FKXUFK LQYLWLQJ DOO WR FRRN DQG HDW DQG \HV IXQGUDLVH 7KHLU ĆYH GH PD\R ĆHVWD IDOO harvest feasts and international banquets sell out. Contributed

Other small groups refurbished the parsonage, experimented with straw bale gardening, constructed a rain garden, put up a Peace Pole, added a columbarium, formed book studies and provided a literacy program at the Crow Wing Jail. In 2000, after a year’s study on becoming an “open and affirming” church, there was a vote to approve a covenant of welcoming all.

This summer, the Brainerd First Congregational UCC invites you to join the 150th anniversary celebration in its many planned activities, beginning with Laura Raedeke and Grace Forbord in concert on the historic organ, June 19 and culminating on Aug. 14, with a celebratory church service. Yes, there will be descendants of the “Church Basement Ladies” involved –- heading committees, being tour guides, and of course, serving food, but take note: This pioneer church still exists because it weathered the changes and continues growing into the future. All are welcome here.

40 | Her Voice Summer 2022

7KH ĆUVW 3UD\HU &LUFOH LQIRUPDOO\ EHJDQ FLUFD V ZKHQ Mrs. Gerrish, who was ill with cancer, asked the church women to pray for her. The group, now called the Women’s Prayer Group, continues to meet weekly. Contributed

The United Church Board for World Ministries members Jan Kurtz, left, and Mardelle Bourdon, offered presentations on hunger issues and the Central American Overground Railroad in the 1980s. Contributed

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Her Voice Summer 2022 | 41

HER TABLE + cookbooks

s ’ t a h W Cookin’?

BY SHARON CARLSON

Cookbooks have been longtime fundraisers for churches.

Containing family favorites from Mom and Grandma’s recipe boxes, they are full of memories of members of the congregation.

Oftentimes they reflect the culture of the area with many from the Midwest containing Scandinavian favorites like Swedish meatballs, rømmegrøt and krumkake.

Here are three summer salad recipes from “What’s Cookin’’ at First Congregational United Church of Christ,” published in 1993. blis

TABOULI SALAD

DIRECTIONS + INGREDIENTS

1 1/2 cup boiling water

Add: 1 to 1 1/2 cups canned cooked garbanzo beans 3/4 cup fresh chopped parsley

Combine and pour over bulgur:

1 cup green onion tops or chives

1/4 cup lemon juice

1 teaspoon fresh dill

1/4 cup cider vinegar

1 cucumber, diced

2 cloves garlic, minced

2-3 diced tomatoes

1 teaspoon Dijon or dry mustard

Eat when bulgur is soft.

Serves 15-20. Can be used in pocket bread.

1/4 cup vegetable oil Salt and pepper to taste Marinate 1-2 hours to blend the flavors.

42 | Her Voice Summer 2022

DIRECTIONS + INGREDIENTS TS S Rinse, dry and tear ar into bite-size pieces: 2 bunches (1 1/2 lbs.) fresh spinach Hull, rinse, cut in half and drain on a paper towel: 1 quart fresh strawberries

Add: 2 tablespoons toasted sesame seeds 1 teaspoon poppy seeds In a large salad, bowl combine spinach and strawberries.

Blend: Toss with dressing.

1/2 teaspoon minced onion Serve immediately.

1/4 cup cider vinegar Serves 10.

1/4 cup vegetable oil 1/4 cup honey 2022 update: Top this salad with feta cheese, red onion 1/4 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce rings pecans. g and candied p

BY LOVELLE ARNOLD LD D

To presoak, place bulgur in a bowl. Pour boiling water over it and let it stand for one hour.

1/4 cup olive oil

BY GRACE FORBORD OR ORD RD D

WILD RICE SALAD

BORD

BY GRACE FORBORD

1 1/2 cup Quick Cooking Bulgur

STRAWBERRY SPINACH SALAD

1/2 cup fresh chopped mint

2022 update: Light, fresh and healthy, this salad can be made with quinoa rather than the traditional bulgur wheat.

DIRECTIONS + INGREDIENTS 1 cup wild rice 2 cups diced cooked chicken 1 cup chopped celery 1/4 cup chopped green pepper Small jar pimento 2 oz. jar mushrooms (or fresh) 2 tablespoons minced onion (or more) 1/2 to 1 teaspoon salt Dash pepper 2 tablespoons sweet pickle relish 1 cup mayonnaise flavored with 2 teaspoons Durkee’s dressing or dry mustard

1/4 cup chopped ripe olives 1/4 cup toasted slivered almonds.

Prepare rice as the package directs.

Cool.

Combine all ingredients except toasted almonds.

Cover and refrigerate for several hours.

Just before serving, add almonds.

Serves 8.

2022 update: Cut prep time by using canned wild rice (3 cups) and deli chicken.

HER LIFESTYLE + mother earth

BALSAM MOON PRESERVE:

A Dream in the Making

BY BARB MANN What leads us to manifest a certain dream or vision?

In life, I know each moment affects the next and the next, rippling out like a pebble dropped into a lake. We don’t know the impact of each ripple, only that it’s moving out into the world beyond our sight. Those ripples begin with thoughts and feelings before any actions take place. It matters what we think, what we feel and how we act. And amazingly, we have individual choices over each of those.

My dream, my vision, which I have held for 30-plus years has always been an inner knowing, that voice within that says, “keep going.” The vision’s often been fuzzy, lacking in detail and still pulling me forward, demanding patience.

That “voice” led me to my partner, Doug, a shared vision and my resounding “yes” to our adventure — Balsam Moon Preserve. Together we are creating a place of peace, sustainability, renewal and regeneration in partnership with spirit, earth and

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Her Voice Summer 2022 | 43

7KH FRPSOHWHG ZRRG ĆUHG EDUUHO RYHQ LV UHDG\ IRU baking pizzas and bread, or roasting turkey, veggies and drying herbs, too. The shelter protects it from the elements, the “counters” and bench aid while working and entertaining guests. Contributed ture continues. There is a deep sense of awe and gratitude for all life has offered and continues to offer in the dream-making.

%DUE 0DQQ DSSOLHV WKH ĆUVW OD\HU RI FRE Balsam Moon emerges out of an awareness of spirit-infused liv(a mix of sand, clay, straw and water) to the barrel oven. A ing and a desire to preserve, protect and nurture these 20 acres second layer, dyed red, was then applied. Contributed into the future. We desire to give back to Mother Earth by regenall living beings, seen and unseen, in rural Pine River.

All my life experiences, skills learned, education, spirituality, connections with others, seem to now make total sense in relation to what I am doing; what Doug and I, and others, are co-creating together at Balsam Moon. It’s like a web with many strands, a weaving of great diversity as it keeps emerging.

Each thread of my life continues to form a whole. My love of gardening emerged at age 6. Ten years in 4-H filled me with a treasury of skills and formed my understanding of connection and responsibility within family and community. My spiritual understandings began in church and broadened to a blending of many understandings honoring the divinity in all life. Academic degrees in textiles and clothing design and educational administration and leadership developed discipline and critical thinking in learning. Jobs with inner-city community organizing and social justice, community education, the arts and food co-op development strongly impacted my path. I overcame health challenges — breast cancer and hyperthyroidism. Thirty years were shared with my spouse raising our daughter and eventually we parted ways with differing dreams. In partnership with others, I created farm markets, community gardens and sustainability workshops.

I created labyrinths and many networks in the community. And more recently leapt into a new relationship at age 59 — fulfilling dreams together with a shared sense of fun.

Most of these life choices were intentional, some seemingly by default, and yet they all creatively weave together as the adven44 | Her Voice Summer 2022

erating the soil and creating habitat for critters as well as food for living. We recognize the harm done, particularly to Native and Indigenous Peoples, by the false narrative of a colonial perspective of history, and by the actions taken that have caused personal and cultural traumas. We also recognize the exploitation and degradation of the land, water, animals and people by a system that values profit over people and demands growth at any cost. Given that awareness, we consciously choose: to honor all life; to seek forgiveness and healing of past traumas, personal and cultural; to regenerate the land, water and air; to live from an understanding of and sharing of abundance; to live with intention, honoring our rich diversity and learning from each other, including nature; to live simply; to operate with reciprocity honoring many ways to maintain balance in giving and receiving; to live life in joy and laughter, sadness and tears experiencing all life has to offer us as human beings beyond simply doing and being grateful for all that emerges and what we learn in the process.

I am learning to slow down, to listen and be present in as many moments as I can be. To learn to feel and hear our connections with each other, with all life, that moves me beyond divisiveness.

The International Council of Thirteen Indigenous Grandmothers (now a defunct group) taught that it is essential to focus on healing ourselves, for in doing so, the world heals. That healing takes place in community, in relationship with each other, with spirit, with the earth and all living beings.

For me, this is a time to be of service to others given the skills and gifts I possess, to share the abundance with gratitude, and Balsam Moon is my living dream in fulfilling that desire.

“May you know you are welcome here in this place. Come walk a labyrinth in the woods and meander through the gardens,” Barb says.

Come join in the adventure at Balsam Moon Preserve, a dream in the making.

(For more information about Balsam Moon Preserve visit balsammoonpreserve.wixsite. com/balsam, FaceBook, or email at BalsamMoon3148@gmail.com.)

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experience. She continues to experience awe in: the magic of seeds, the stars at night, the diverse beauty in flowers, the power of love over the love of power, and the amazing drive for ALL beings to live. doluptatio dolutet quibus

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Barb Mann is a spirit-filled human being having a fully human

May you know you are welcome here in this place. Come walk a labyrinth in the woods and meander through the gardens. We welcome you to participate in workshops such as foraging wild edibles, sustainability and alternative building techniques. Join us at pizza nights — enjoying pizza made in a homemade wood-fired barrel oven. Stroll along trails, lead the young along a story-walk in the woods and soak up growing greens in a deep-winter greenhouse in the winter. Find respite in a renewing retreat, or participate in an internship to build your own skills. Join us in visits to learn about solar applications. Experience a limited live-in residency, spiritual gatherings, and fun. May this place be of service to you as it continues to be of service to us.

NOTE: This place resides on the lands of the: Očhéthi Šakówiŋ (Lakota / Dakota); Mdewakanton (sub-tribe of the Isanti Dakota); and Anishinabewaki. You are invited to look up the ancestral land you are on: native-land.ca/

Balsam Moon offers hospitality and is a place to experience work as love in action, to celebrate together in community, to learn and grow together, to renew and nurture both self and others, to be creative, to rest and just be.

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CONTACT US 13540 Ironwood Drive • Brainerd, MN 56401 | HOURS Monday - Friday 8am-5pm Her Voice Summer 2022 | 45

HER VOICE

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