44
BECOMING PREGNANT WITH CEREBRAL PALSY ✦ I’ve always disliked being treated differently because of my cerebral palsy (CP), but now I'm pregnant ... Can I go through this pregnancy?
Here's my story, Deaire Pecora, Brand Ambassador for disAbility Maternity Care
T
hat first pregnancy test is nerve-wracking for everyone, so many thoughts pass through your head as you wait for a result.
For me, that very first time, I was skeptical. I’d taken three tests in the weeks prior, and they had been negative. But now though, I was three weeks late and bam, it was positive.Then the horrific fear set in. This was an unplanned pregnancy and I’d spent years being warned by everyone, from doctors to friends and family, that I might not be physically capable of carrying a healthy baby to term. So, I was terrified. It didn’t help that when I went to the doctors, there was no reassurance or advice. I was told they’d treat me like any other pregnant woman and go from there. On one hand, that was good. I’ve always disliked being treated differently because of my cerebral palsy (CP). However, this made me more anxious, because I had so many questions, all related to my disability. I wanted someone to let me know what to expect and what I should do. For example, falling is a big factor of my disability. Through exercise, massage and physiotherapy, I had significantly decreased my number of falls, but they were still common. So, what would happen to the baby if I fell? I think most first-time mums encounter early fears and doubts. But when you add in a physical disability, my anxiety was at a whole other level. I didn’t know what questions to ask or who to reach out to. So, I researched and kept pushing my doctors and midwives to find me some answers. In terms of medical help, I was only able to confirm one thing that a physio had suggested to me years earlier – that due to the impacts of my CP on my hips and legs, it was too dangerous for me to have a natural birth.
I kept pushing and asking. You see, I wanted to do it all myself. I was asking questions about how I could perform the physical tasks required of a parent. I actually had one
Midwife say to me, when I asked her about how I could transport my baby from room to room, “We’ll, won’t your mother or husband just do that?” I was offended. Not only does my husband work full time and regardless of the fact that I have no relationship with my mother, I wanted to be able to do as much of the parenting tasks myself as possible. That surprised many medical professionals, because they just presumed that as someone with a disability like mine, I would just have someone else do the physical tasks for me. With no advice in this area, I just had to assure myself that I would take each obstacle as it came and find a way to get things done.
