Cafe Culture Digital 10 by Cafe Culture

issue #10

o c t o b e r /1 9

MORE THAN JUST A MAGAZINE

NEWS PEOPLE RECIPES REVIEWS PRODUCTS GLOBAL EVENTS INSIGHTS SOCIAL TRENDS FOOD BEVERAGE COFFEE

ANNUAL BUMPER EDITION

Sweetstock

GET READY FOR SWEETSTOCK 2020 SEE PG 16 FOR MORE DETAIL

Contacts PRODUCED AND PUBLISHED BY CAFE CULTURE INTERNATIONAL MANAGING DIRECTOR - SEAN EDWARDS MOBILE: 0419 287 608 PO BOX 5728 PORT MACQUARIE NSW 2444 GRAPHIC DESIGNER - BONI LORNIE BONI@CAFECULTURE.COM SALES EXECUTIVE - JEREMY WALL JEREMY@CAFECULTURE.COM MOBILE: 0427 147 218 CAFE PULSE RESEARCH DIRECTOR - DAVID PARNHAM DAVID@CAFECULTURE.COM MOBILE: 0423 200 206 FINANCIAL CONTROLLER - KRISTINE EDWARDS ACCOUNTS@CAFECULTURE.COM SOCIAL MEDIA - TILLY EDWARDS TILLY@CAFECULTURE.COM PROOF READER - KATHRYN KRASKA MEDIA RELEASES TO INFO@CAFECULTURE.COM VISIT CAFECULTURE.COM FOR MORE INFO AND TO PURCHASE CAFE CULTURE MAGAZINE

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Contents

Cafe C O N T E N T S

REGULARS P R O F I L E 6. PUBLISHER’S NOTE

R O A S T E R

WOOD

8. INDUSTRY NEWS

R O

24. REFLECTIONS OF A BEAN COUNTER

c t

FEATURES 12. RENEKA LIFE 16. SWEETSTOCK 20. TOBYS ESTATE

50. THE WOOD ROASTER The most common source of fuel used to supply a coffee roaster with heat is gas. The Wood Roaster, however, roast their coffee beans the traditional way, exclusively over a fire fuelled by Ironbark wood.

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H C

Regulars. R l 9. NEWS FROM ABOVE

News from above with Phillip Di Bella.

12. CULTURED PRODUCTS

Some of the latest and greatest products to hit the café and hospitality marketplace.

14. CULTURED GOSSIP

Get the latest news for café owners and the café industry.

You serve the coffee, we insure i

CAFE CULTURE DIGITAL - MORE THAN JUST A MAGAZINE

For a FREE sample contact:

GoodFoodWarehouse.com.au 1300 637 620 CAFE CULTURE DIGITAL - MORE THAN JUST A MAGAZINE

CAFE CULTURE DIGITAL - MORE THAN JUST A MAGAZINE

Decisions, decisions... (PUBLISHER’S NOTE) by Sean Edwards

Hi all ! I am back in the country and excited

My rant this month is about completing

about being home. It’s been a fun few

tasks. Many people ask me ‘how do you

months touring the USA and completing

get things done when you have so many

another exciting Golden Bean. This year we

businesses and travel so much?’ It’s simple.

were in Nashville and had over 1300 entries

I have a list of projects that I know I can

from over 300 North American coffee

personally achieve. This list is written down

roasters who participated in the event.

in my notebook and I subtract the job

We are now just a few weeks away from Golden Bean Australi/NZ and the entries are coming in fast. We have lots of fun activities planned for the delegates and judges and some great educational workshops. If you have not come to a Golden Bean and you are a coffee roaster or are thinking about entering this space, Golden Bean is the right event for you. Offering a unique opportunity to cup thousands of the world’s best coffees and to learn from the industry’s best. We are back in Port Macquarie for

when it’s complete and add a new project when it arises. I never have more than ten projects on my list. I try my hardest not to get overwhelmed with a heavy workload

targets and financial guidelines with limits. I try and limit face to face meetings, If I can pick up a phone and talk to somebody directly it saves time and often leads to a solution. I like face to face meetings for annual planning and that’s when I will involve all team members to workshop ideas and visons. Private group chats are great and the best communication tools when people are mobile.

as this leads to stress and poor judgement

One of the biggest secrets to my working

in decision making. The human brain

life is to have a rest when my body tells

works best when it is not over loaded, and

me. I travel a lot, so my body clock is non-

sticking to this rule has saved my sanity. I

existent. I know from personal experience,

also avoid the diary if I can, yes big events

the effects of stress on my well-being from

I mark down but I try and keep free space

the long hours spent running a café. I

one month forward in my life at all times so

would roster myself off some afternoons

I can be flexible.

and go to the beach for a swim or take an “arvo” nap in a quiet spot. This saved my

the 2019 event, with activities starting on

I always try and surround myself with

Tuesday the 19th of November. We are

people that can make their own decisions,

bringing Brandon Bir out from the USA

who only include me in the process if

to do another workshop around the art

there is a big expense involved or if serious

of recognising taste profiles, both good

repercussions are likely. Often staff will

I am looking forward to this years Golden

and bad, during the cupping process.

throw everything at you if you’re the

Bean in our hometown of Port Macquarie

This is a practical workshop that will steer

boss and this also leads to an increase

and to the social interaction of this fun and

participants into Q-cupping qualifications.

in workload and again more stress.

educational event.

We have limited spaces for this workshop

Empowering people to make decisions is

which will be run before Golden Bean on

one of the best management decisions

Tuesday the 19th of November.

you can make. You just need to set goals,

sanity and once the guilt of resting moved on, my head was much clearer to make good business decisions.

Thank You Head Bean, Sean Edwards

CAFE CULTURE DIGITAL - MORE THAN JUST A MAGAZINE

The Employee Experience (INDUSTRY NEWS) by Fiona Smart I’ve recently worked with some business

The benefit of having someone attempt to

ability to attract suitable and like minded,

owners to assist in recruiting for key

poach from your team is that it provides

quality staff. i.e. Like attracts like. It is

positions - head chefs, managers,

an opportunity to reflect on what you are

not surprising that smart employers are

supervisors and quality baristas, and it’s been

doing to ensure you are looking after them.

beginning to think of employees more like

an enlightening process. From an employer

One of the tools I practised was ongoing

perspective, here’s what I’ve found;

and open communication around their happiness and needs, so that whatever

There appears to be a lot more people looking for ‘key employees’ than there are ‘key employees’ to fill the range of roles. The recruitment process is a quagmire of

creative benefits and offers were put on the table by others, I had more chance of retaining my core team members.

customers, and paying closer attention to the moments that matter most, in achieving employee retention. This includes ensuring your managers and supervisors are aligned with your business mission and values. An employer maintaining the delicate

great conversations that end up in no-shows

Savvy operators know that one of the keys

for interviews, calls not returned, positions

to success is having familiar faces in your

balance of all of the elements at play in a

successfully filled for a few days, then

business to create a level of consistency

successful business requires agility, resilience

dropped for a better or earlier offer, and

for your customers. This is a competitive

and some time spent on building structure

I get the sense that great staff really are

advantage in what has typically been a

and systems around repetitive processes,

calling the shots in terms of finding the right

transient workforce.

such as induction, position descriptions,

employer for them.

In small cafes the importance of a quality

After many false starts, and disappointments

induction & acculturation process can be

using a number of the standard recruitment

easily overlooked for a variety of reasons,

skills and strengths and allow the active

platforms, I had a conversation with a

but the rules of employee engagement have

contribution of unique talents.

colleague who suggested my clients might

shifted dramatically and it seems employees are seeking a higher level of experience,

need to go and poach someone. In all

both in their transition into, and ongoing

my time as a cafe owner I was against

contribution to a workplace.

poaching, even though I’ll admit I was

standard procedures and more creative learning pathways that expand employee

Some questions to ask yourself are: Do my employees know what is expected of them? Have I provided the materials they need to perform their duties efficiently? Are

tempted to go down that road on a couple

As employers, it’s important to consider

desperate occasions.

what the employee journey looks like, what

The argument for poaching is that if you are looking after your employees, they’ll have no reason to leave you. That’s true, but it can often end up in a sort of bidding war around salary and benefits. To avoid that kind of situation, I aimed to create a

you offer - from the most basic level of providing payslips and employee contracts on time, to what you promise and deliver on, as well as how you develop and nurture the skills and strengths of your team members.

they working to their strengths? Do you make them feel valued every day? Are you providing regular and positive feedback? Are you listening to their ideas? Are you providing opportunities for them to learn and grow? Do they know how important they are to the success of the business?

team that was not solely driven by their

Brand and culture are the foundations that

These questions should be both organic

paycheck, but by the value, opportunity and

present your business’ unique position

conversations and as well form part of a

appreciation they received by being part of

and you’ll find that great cafes have an

bigger structure that defines your employee

our team.

intangible energy around them that has the

engagement strategies.

CAFE CULTURE DIGITAL - MORE THAN JUST A MAGAZINE

Some questions to ask yourself are: Do my employees know what is expected of them? Have I provided the materials they need to perform their duties efficiently? Are they working to their strengths? Do you make them feel valued every day? Are you providing regular and positive feedback? Are you listening to their ideas? Are you providing opportunities for them to learn and grow? Do they know how important they are to the success of the business?

CAFE CULTURE DIGITAL - MORE THAN JUST A MAGAZINE

THE MAGAZINE FOR THE CAFE INDUSTRY AU $14.95 ISSUE 49

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RENEKA Life with LATTE ART and AROMA PERFECT Technology [EXCLUSIVE TO ESSENTIAL COFFEE]

Introducing the RENEKA Life 2, the complete

vary the amount of required air and temperature to

package! Imagine a world where you don’t have to

cater for different types of liquids. The LATTE ART

do any tamping! Just fill up the group handle with

automated frother helps the most novice coffee maker

freshly ground coffee and let the AROMA PERFECT

produce silky smooth “micro foam” time after time.

technology take over, no need to tamp, just simply insert the group handle and press the button to

All you need to do is, pour your milk into a milk jug,

extract the perfect espresso. Coupled with the

place the LATTE ART wand inside the jug and press the

amazing automatic LATTE ART steam wand makes the

button to choose your desired milk option. The result

RENEKA Life 2 the complete package that guarantees

will be a well-steamed milk with a uniform texture

consistency!

at the optimal temperature that will support and

Sounds like science fiction, right? The RENEKA Life 2 and 3 group machine, designed and manufactured in France, are a cafe owners’ dream come true!

complement the qualities in your espresso. Now, you are finally ready to pour the milk and craft your latte art patterns. The time saved on holding the jug and monitoring the milk can be spent on cleaning tasks or taking orders,

The self-tamping AROMA PERFECT technology and

increasing the efficiency as well as the coffee and

LATTE ART technology make the “perfect” coffee and

service speed and consistency.

milk every time at the touch of a button. It’s as easy as 1, 2, 3! With minimum training necessary.

No need to buy any extra equipment that takes up space and needs extra maintenance to automatically

The patented AROMA PERFECT brewing unit

steam your milk or tamp the coffee! All you need is

delivers optimum tamping pressure. The brew head

the RENEKA Life coffee machine with AROMA PERFECT

automatically adapts to the amount of coffee and

and LATTE ART technology to have the complete

supports changes in dosage to ensure the perfect

package!!

tamp pressure for a great extraction every time. Patented technology also minimizes the pressure on

RENEKA took into account all the physical effects

the brewing unit seals – which translates into less

of tamping on baristas and developed the AROMA

wear and lower maintenance costs.

PERFECT brew head and matched it with the LATTE

With the LATTE ART technology, compressed air and steam gets mixed inside the machine. The compressed

ART technology. No more repetitive strain injuries (RSI) to barista’s wrists and elbows.

air is created by a separate pump. The air-steam

CALL Essential Coffee, the exclusive supplier of Reneka

mixture creates a finer foam. Four different milk

handmade premium European coffee machines, and

programs are available at the touch of a button to

associated products, to book your free demonstration.

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LOOKING TO REDUCE LABOUR COSTS FOR YOUR CAFE WITHOUT COMPROMISING ON QUALITY? 13 The RENEKA Life 2 / Life 3 is a French barista coffee machine that will help you cut down on manual work & produce excellent, consistent coffee experiences for your customers

“

FEATURES: •

Latte Art technology: for well-steamed milk with a uniform texture at the optimal temperature - four different milk programs available.

•

“Cool touch” steam outlet with push button or tap version

•

Mixed hot water outlet (electronic control) with 2 programmable doses

•

Illuminated cup area

•

Programmable pre-infusion

•

Electronic microprocessor 5 selections per group

•

Magnetic coupling pump

•

Aroma Perfect: for perfect coffee extraction every time, and easy insertion of the ﬁlter holder into the brewhead

•

Anti-Pics boiler: auto-regulation system which stabilizes the brewing temperature and makes the preventive ﬂushing cycle unnecessary

•

Automatic cleaning program of coffee brewhead and Barista Steam

•

“Pull-out” espresso cup tray to work either with take-away cups or smaller cups

•

ECO Stand-by function

•

LCD display

“The RENEKA Life 2 and 3 group machine, designed and manufactured in France, are a cafe owners’ dream come true! ”

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CAF Ã&#x2030; S CH O O L

F E AT U R E

AUSTRALASIAN

WE WANT TO HELP YOU SUCCEED IN YOUR CAFE

T H E A U S T R A L A S I A N C A F E S C H O O L O F F E R S state of the art facilities with courses designed for existing cafes, new starters and cafe fix ups. The cafe school will help deliver a comprehensive understanding of the retail cafe industry and the methodology to succeed.

FOR EXPRESSIONS OF INTEREST PLEASE CALL 02 6583 7163 OR EMAIL INFO@CAFECULTURE.COM CAFE CULTURE MAGAZINE WWW.CAFESCHOOL.COM.AU CAFE CULTURE DIGITAL - MORE THAN JUST A MAGAZINE

15.

Prepare for a sensory overload! [SWEETSTOCK LAUNCHES IN MELBOURNE 2020]

Sweetstock is a totally new food and music festival experience that will put you on the sugar high of your life! In its inaugural year, Sweetstock will launch in Melbourne on the 28th-29th March 2020, filled with cake battles, dessert challenges, decadent food trucks and special guest Duff Goldman from Charm City Cakes (USA). Along with street performers and circus acts, there is also an awesome music line-up to dance into the neon filled night. Headlining the festival will be dance duo Sneaky Sound System, with upbeat electronic artist Alice Ivy, aptly named indie band Jawbreakers and the crazy Melbourne pop stars Approachable Members Of Your Local Community. More acts to be announced. And don’t think the weekend is all sweetness and love, the competition is fierce in this festival ground, with the SBS Food Australian Cake Battle showcasing some of Australia’s best bakers live on stage in a 60 minute battle, alongside the Australian Dessert Championship for anyone to enter. Teams of three, from home cooks to professionals will challenge each other in various categories, including Cupcake, Cheesecake, Pavlova, Pie, Tart and Chef’s Choice. Each competition will win a delicious $5,000.00. If you want to learn for the best then get in quick to register for the masterclass with America’s most sought after cake makers, Duff Goldman. Renowned for his crazy over the top masterpieces, he will be hosting a one off masterclass on the Friday, and will be appearing throughout the festival over the weekend. For those who love to eat rather than bake, there is a competition for you too! Enter the Donut Throwdown to pop as many donuts into your belly within 3 minutes to win a cheeky $2,000.00. Easy! Is that too much sugary action to pack into two days you may ask? Absolutely not. As well as that there are show-bags, a sweet expo, live art, retro car show, free kids rides and thankfully for the parents there’s bubbly and cider!

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Tickets are on sale now at www.sweetstock.com.au Ticket prices as following: SATURDAY General Admission $40.00 SATURDAY Evening Ticket $40.00 SUNDAY General Admission $40.00 2 DAY FESTIVAL PASS $65.00 KIDS UNDER 12 - FREE

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DOWNLOAD AND PRINT YOUR A3 POSTER HERE

2019 2020

september |2019 23-25 TEA & COFFEE WORLD CONFERENCE - HONG KONG

december |2019

october |2019 18-22 HOST MILANO - MILAN, ITALY

january |2020 10-12 VIENNA COFFEE FESTIVAL - VIENNA

14-15 COFFEE & TEA FESTIVAL VALLEY FORGE VALLEY FORGE, PENNSYLVANIA

november |2019 19-23 GOLDEN BEAN AUSTRALIA - PORT MACQUARIE

february |2020 01-02 TORONTO TEA FESTIVAL - TORONTO, CANADA

may |2020

april |2020

march |2020

23-26 SPECIALTY COFFEE EXPO - PORTLAND, USA

08-10 COFFEE FEST NEW YORK - NEW YORK, USA

04-07 MICE & WBC (WORLD BARISTA CHAMPIONSHIP AND WORLD BREWERS CUP) - MELBOURNE

august |2020

july |2020

june |2020 18-20 WORLD COFFEE CHAMPIONSHIPS - WARSAW, POLAND

01-03 JAPAN INTERNATIONAL TEA SHOW - YOKOHAMA, JAPAN

30-01 SEP EXPO BRASIL CHOCOLATE (EBC) - SÃ&#x192;O PAULO, BRAZIL

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19. 19

AUSTRALIAN CAFE | MARKET REPORT

WHAT SHAPES YOUR INDUSTRY 2017/18

This is the ultimate Café Industry OOH coffee market report that will greatly assist you to better understand the important growth factors that shape this vital café market.

I N T E R N A T I O N A L

WHAT SHAPES YOUR INDUSTRY REPORT Café Pulse is an independent research company providing a unique resource for Australian Café businesses & industry suppliers, whether that is in the Independent Grocery, Cafe Channels and/or across many small businesses in general. In consultation with a café owners panel, the inaugural Café Pulse survey (September 2010), an idea to improve Café Industry service satisfaction was developed to address real issues in the café market. We then received over 665 completed Café Pulse surveys, representing over 900 individual cafés. This enabled us to collect valuable industry statistics, information and café supplier performance measurements. Now in our 6th year Café Pulse has a wealth of statistical data captured and leads the Café Industry as the trusted source of Café trends Australia wide. KEY INSIGHTS AND CAFE TRENDS This is the ultimate Café Industry OOH coffee market report that will greatly assist you to better understand the important growth factors that shape this vital café market. Ideal for marketing and brand managers, sales managers

and their sales staff, manufacturers and importers, green bean suppliers, beverage and snack food companies, fresh food and wholesalers, service providers and small business insurers, just to name a few. Available as a summary or a full and comprehensive report. Summary OOH Coffee Industry Report – $7,800 +GST The top line summary report provides a brief overview into the Australian Coffee Market OOH via the detailed Pulse survey results. Including an overall general industry understanding and information on service & supply perceptions to enable your business to best understand the local café market. This essential report is for coffee companies, café suppliers and manufacturers, importers and others trying to sell into this growth channel. Comprehensive OOH Coffee Industry Report – $9,800 +GST The Comprehensive report encompasses overall insights from all the sections of the surveys. This detailed report presents the OOH Coffee Industry and covers many key insights, café trends and support material for your business to include into your planning and brand development.

For further information or to purchase these important reports contact Sean Edwards at sean@cafeculture.com CAFE CULTURE DIGITAL - MORE THAN JUST A MAGAZINE

Toby’s Estate rises to consumer demand for premium café oat milk

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ALTERNATIVE MILKS ARE TRENDING GLOBALLY AS MORE

“Plant-based diets are incredibly popular right now, and when it

PEOPLE OPT TO GO DAIRY FREE FOR HEALTH, ETHICAL AND

comes to coffee, customers are very particular and aren’t just after

SUSTAINABLE REASONS. IN FACT, MORE THAN TWO MILLION

dairy free. They also want a wide range of options,” says Jody

AUSTRALIANS NOW IDENTIFY AS VEGETARIAN OR VEGAN, AND

Leslie, Toby’s Estate General Manager.

AS THIS FIGURE INCREASES, SO DOES THE DEMAND FOR MORE PLANT MILK PRODUCTS.

“We were looking for a premium oat milk and found the perfect product in Califia Farms Oat Barista Blend. It’s so creamy and

In many ways the coffee industry is driving the dairy free

delicious, yet importantly doesn’t overtake the flavour of our

movement, with more customers than ever before choosing

coffee. It’s ideal for baristas too because it’s thicker than other

alternatives for their daily cuppa. And while soy and almond

plant milks, easy to stretch, has a smooth pour and it doesn’t split.

have been regular fixtures in most cafés for a while now, there’s

It is very close to how full fat milk performs,” she says.

another plant milk that’s quickly becoming the new favourite among coffee drinkers and that’s oat milk.

Califia’s Oat Barista Blend is made from whole rolled oats and is completely unsweetened with no added sugar, gums, dairy or

According to speciality coffee roaster, Toby’s Estate, the requests

soy. It also has half the amount of natural sugar than other oat

from customers for oat milk have been so great (due to it having

milk brands, is made from a sustainable grain, and is full of fibre,

a very similar taste and texture to cow’s milk), that they recently

protein and good fats.

partnered with Califia Farms to bring a premium barista option to their customers nationwide.

“We’re always on the lookout for new options to offer our customers and are really pleased with how much everyone is

Launching in Australia only a few months ago (after huge success

loving Califia Farms Oat Barista Blend in their lattes and other

in the US), Califia Farms new Oat Barista Blend is crafted by

drinks,” Jody adds.

baristas, for baristas; and Toby’s Estate is the first large specialty coffee roaster now distributing it to their extensive café network

Califia Farms Oat Barista Blend is available now for the

across Australia, starting with NSW.

Australian Barista community. For more information email: Australia@califiafarms.com. To learn more about Toby’s Estate visit: tobysestate.com.au.

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LOVE OF COFFEE Join us in Port Macquarie for COFFEE ROASTERS COMPETITION AND CONFERENCE

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Reflections of a Bean Counter #3 (THE PROBLEM TO THE ANSWER) by Martyn Smith

WHEN MONEY IS TIGHT AND WE DON’T HAVE A PLAN, STRESS LEVELS START TO RISE. OUR IMAGINATIONS CAN RUN WILD…

THE PHONE CALL WE FEAR You: Hello? Supplier: This is Great Aussie Wholesale; we notice that your bill is eleven days overdue. You: Yeah, things are pretty tight at the moment... Supplier: We’ve commenced legal action and we’ll be taking your house. And you’re going to jail.

...So, out of fear, we may work like a trojan to earn more or spend less. Perhaps sleep is affected. Perhaps we avoid contact with those to whom we owe money. Typically clever and cheeky, English band 10CC wrote, ‘Communication is the problem to the answer’. Without a plan communication suffers, relationships freefall and answers are harder to come by.

And your partner’s going to jail…and your kids are going to jail. You’ve been blacklisted and you can never operate in Australia again. We’ve also notified our five million social media followers. And reporters from A Current Affair are waiting by your car. Today Tonight is at your front door. And you’re going to jail. We like to repeat that for effect. We value your feedback; please stay on the line to complete a short survey.

Finance news is brought to you by Martyn Smith - Managing director of Ricca Coffee Company in Thebarton, South Australia. He is a Chartered Accountant and graduate member of the Australian Institute of Company Directors. This article contains general information only and should not be taken as constituting professional advice.

CAFE CULTURE DIGITAL - MORE THAN JUST A MAGAZINE

A good plan is an antidote to defensiveness and fear, as well as to anger and aggression. A good plan supports confidence, respect and trust.

THE PHONE CALL WE ENDURE You:

A good plan enables us to be personal and proactive…

Hello? Supplier: This is Great Aussie Wholesale; we notice that your bill is eleven days overdue. You: Oh sorry, can you send me a copy? Supplier:

THE PHONE CALL WE AVOID Supplier:

We were asked to do that last week and sent one by regular mail and another by email. We also found an old fax machine...

Hello, Great Aussie Wholesale accounts, this is Sheena speaking. You:

You: I’m definitely going to pay, but I’m waiting for a major customer to pay me. And my tax refund will come in soon.

Hi Sheena. My name’s...

Do you have a date for that?

I’m embarrassed to say that I’d like an extension for our bill that is due on Friday. I’d like to pay a quarter next Tuesday, half on the 19th and the balance on the 27th. I’ll put it in an email and I’d really appreciate your consideration.

You:

Sheena:

Next payment run for sure.

Thanks for ringing ahead of time, not many people do that. Send me the email and I’ll get back to you.

Supplier:

You:

When is that?

Thanks Sheena. Things are pretty tight at the moment, so I’m grateful.

You: Could be this weekend.

Sheena:

Supplier:

Happy to have a look at it. Bye bye.

You’ll pay it by next Monday then? You:

You: See you.

Look!!! This feels like harassment to me and you can’t bully people like this.

Sheena:

Supplier:

(Reply email within 24 hours) ....your arrangement is approved...

I’m sorry that you feel like we’re harassing you. We’ll call back on Monday if the payment hasn’t come through.Have a nice day.

You: Zzzzzzzz (the sound of a good night’s sleep).

You: <groan>

NEXT TIME…I AM NOT A ROCK

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