V 47 i05

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× October 7th 2013

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CAPILANO north vancouver

N o . 05

COURIER SCIENTIFIC SUPERHEROES

TO THE RESCUE New government policies attempt to stifle environmental research

RONALD MCDONALD HOUSE

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TOILET CAMS

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COMING OUT DAY

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CRITTERS AT CAP

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47 issue N o . 05

CAPILANO Courier

@capilanocourier

@capcourier

Capilanocourier.com

TABLE OF CONTENTS

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06

10

12

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19

News

Columns

features

calendar

A+C

opinions

caboose

Legal Heroin

Famine + Food

The Jaywalker

Boobs + Wieners

Loonie Tunes

Handi-Cap

Small Town News

Therese Guieb Features Editor

Andy Rice Arts + Culture Editor

The Staff

Scott Moraes Managing Editor

Kristi Alexandra Copy Editor

Katherine Gillard News Editor

the capilano courier

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47 issue N o . 05

Leah Scheitel Editor-in-Chief

of this diva-loving university paper

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Jeremy Hanlon Caboose Editor

Andrew Palmquist Production Manager

Cheryl Swan Art Director

The Capilano Courier is an autonomous, democratically run student newspaper.

Literary and visual submissions are welcomed. All submissions are subject to editing for brevity, taste, and legality. The Capilano Courier will not publish material deemed by the collective to exhibit sexism, racism or homophobia. The views expressed by the contributing writers are not necessarily those of the Capilano Courier Publishing Society.

Faye Alexander Opinions Editor

Ricky Bao Business Manager

Carlo Javier Staff Writer

Lindsay Howe Marketing/Ads/Web Editor

LETTER FROM THE EDITOR

on

life & Irresponsibility

“I just love the spirit that makes people do things that they probably shouldn't”

Leah Scheitel × Editor-in-Chief

– Johnny Knoxville

Life gets weird sometimes. You set off in one direction, wanting to conquer something, and through a series of events, the path turns and takes you in a different direction. And so you go to Plan B, and start the process over again. It’s like when you want to clean your room and instead you end up watching Arrested Development on Netflix and writing letters – or, on a larger scale, when you set off to be an architect, and somehow that morphs into a career as a stand-up comic.

Three years ago, I didn’t even know where Capilano University was. I knew nothing of the Courier, and thought business school was for smart people who wanted to have no fun. What I wanted to do was, as cliché as it may sound, snowboard every day and somehow get paid for it. Fresh out of photojournalism school, I genuinely thought that I could just snowboard, eat, and party, and that someone was going to pay me for it. Of course no one did, and I found myself working at a backcountry ski lodge, cleaning shitters and making beds for people who were skiing cool shit every day.

One night, I was drinking with a lodge regular. He was a ski photographer who lived in California, and was the staff photographer for Powder and Surfer magazine. He also owned part of the ski company, Armada (which had shares at Retallack Lodge, where I worked). He had an impressive resume, and one that I thought exceeded his talents.

He was good, but not that good to have so much going for him.

“Okay, O’Connell,” I stammered, “How did you do it? Why are there so many photographers living in their mothers' basement while you are getting cover shots, and working constantly?”

And luckily, he was honest in his reply. “I went to business school. Every other schmuck with a camera was learning how to take photos of leaves in the forest and I was learning how to sell it.”

He said that he knew he wasn’t the best at what he did, and admitted that there were others more deserving of his success than he was, but business school acted as a shortcut in his path to the lifestyle that he wanted.

The next day, I applied to three different business schools, and one of them was CapU. I’m thinking of this because I believe I’m so off from where I started. This started as a dream to snowboard every day, and live in the mountains, and currently I live in the middle of a city. Over the past two years, I have gone snowboarding a total of three-and-a-half times. And the snowboard and ski magazines that I used to read with religious devotion have been switched to Globe and Mail newspapers and issues of Vanity Fair.

And instead of writing about cool backcountry trips, I’m pumping out these editorials every week. Things are very different than what I had planned.

I was craving a reminder of what got me to this position, taking Business Law classes, and running a university newspaper. Instead of studying for my five midterms last week (that really sucked, by the way), I went to Whistler. There was a movie premier for the new Sherpas film, Into the Mind (for reference, these are the same guys who filmed the Fly Over Canada exhibit at Canada Place), and it was known that this was going to be a party. I was doing shots of tequila with old friends, and seeing people I knew from years ago, when my naïve dream was my only ambition. I even saw O’Connell there, dancing in the middle of the room by himself.

My choice was completely irresponsible and slightly foolish, but it needed to be done.

I needed that reminder of where I started and why I am investing four years and a lot of money into this education. I’m drowning in term papers, essays, and deadlines, to the point that I drastically lost sight of the bigger picture. Doing this brought things back to the simple point that snowboarding made me happy, and I’m doing all of this because of a childhood dream I pursued.

Everyone should do this - everyone should be reminded of their old plans and ambitions, even just to reference where they are now. And everyone should play a bit more (for inspiration on this, read this week’s staff editorial by Cheryl Swan). I don't intend to sound like a flake that wants everyone to quit their academic endeavors to have a party and play outside all the time, but I believe it’s very important to have spouts of irresponsibility. It makes you take a step back from trudging along on whatever path you are on, and realize how far you’ve come from where you started.

THE VOICE BOX

Not really, sorry. By the way, B- is pretty average and is most likely a reflection of your instructor's mid-life crisis. If Noam fucking Chomsky wrote an essay for a Cap instructor, he would still get a B. So sit back, relax, and just don't get an F. Or do.

What do I care?

Yes, we're very fashionable here at the Courier. That's because we're not real journalists. “Real journalists” have degrees, beards, no sense of humour and no sense of fashion. That may be an assumption on my part. I'll admit to that before someone threatens to sue me. We're different. We also give attention to small town news (read my piece on the Caboose this week).

47 issue N o . 05

“Hi Scott. I love your food column and your fiction. Just wanted to say that. Also, I'm 21, I work out and I'm looking

“That guy who dissed Kristi is a douche. Ain't no one accessorizes a unitard like her. Also, Jeremy's moustache is great and I <3 him.”

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Well, you're not in tune with hot things. Spice up your life, and better luck from now on.

Thank you. I'm married. Carlo Javier is single, and a babe. Want his number? I don't know if he can cook, but he can pay the bill at a restaurant of your choice. But check with him first.

×

*

The Voicebox is back, ready to humbly respond to your questions, concerns, and comments about anything Courier. To inquire, just send a text to 778 - 689 - 4642 to anonymously "express" and "voice" your "opinion" and "thoughts" on any "subject" or "issue". And, as long as it's not offensive, we will publish it here, right in the Voicebox. It's a win - win, or whine - whine - whatever way you look at it.

“I don't get the Hot Charts.”

for new friends. I would love if you could cook dinner for me one of these days. Call me.”

the capilano courier

WITH : SCOTT MORAES

“I can't seem to get a grade higher than B- on any essay. I'm, like, a good enough writer but I don't know what's happening. You guys are pretty good writers and you sound smart.

Do you have any secrets or any advice to help me write better?”

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NEWS

NEWS EDITOR × KATHERINE GILLARD

NEWS@CAPILANOCOURIER.COM

injury bites the blues CAPU WOMEN'S SOCCER FACE EARLY CHALLENGES Carlo Javier A sudden and strange blitz of injuries put the start of the Capilano women’s soccer team in a tough position. In the very first game of the season against the Thompson Rivers University Wolfpack, the Capilano Blues suffered a series of injuries that nearly depleted half of their starting line-up – all in one game.

“It was the craziest thing I have seen in my entire soccer career. It is extremely unlikely to face so many injuries at the beginning of the season, let alone in a game,” co-cap. Madeline Carrillo says.

The injuries were so devastating to the line-up that the Blues had to hold open tryouts to fill out their depleted roster. Adding new players to a team in the midst of the beginning of the season is no easy task, considering the practice time that new additions will have missed.

Despite the rough start, the Blues bounced back to win games against Langara and Douglas College, showing that injuries are indeed a challenge, but are not the deciding factor this season.

“The season so far is going well, minus the injuries of course. I believe this team has some potential to make it to top four,” says forward Demmi Skierka.

Carrillo adds that even though the start to the season has been challenging, the team has managed to fight through the early struggles and quickly adapt to the troubles that found them. “We've brought

× Tina Furesz

× Staff Writer

on three new players that have really helped. We haven't had as many great outcomes as we have hoped for but with what we've had to deal with I think we have done a mighty fine job!”

Vanessa Schmidt, Leila Riahi and Darleen Saxer were three players brought in to help the depleted roster.

“As a player, physical challenges such as having to play with an injury will be a big obstacle. As a team, I believe fighting through these injuries will be challenging,” Skierka says.

Being one of the co-captains, Carrillo has the important responsibility of setting an example on and off the field.

When playing a defensive centre-midfield, consistent focus is required as numerous plays are execut-

ed in the middle of the pitch. While off the field, “I try to be as supportive as I can. Mistakes are made and no player is perfect, I find constructive criticism to be the best way of helping players on the pitch,” Carillo says. “I try to stay positive and pick up players when they're down I love cheering my teammates on and telling them they're doing great as often as I can.”

Carrillo also provides consistency in player-coach relationship, having played for Coach Darren Rath since eighth grade. “He is one of the most dedicated coaches I've ever had and although he can get on my nerves I have always respected him and his admiration for the sport,” she says.

The rebuilt roster and anticipated recovery of the sidelined players offers much to be excited for

× Tierney Milne

goodbye to aramark

this season. “I am most excited to become even closer as teammates, and come together as a family.

Many of us have been playing together for years, and the rookies are fitting in nicely,” Skierka says.

Amy Kirby, a graduate of Centennial Secondary is one of the players who’ll be jumping right out of the high school level into the intense university soccer. “The level of soccer has definitely increased compared to high school and for the better,” Kirby says. “I'm even more excited about getting together with a new team and a new level of soccer that will be played. I'm always very excited for provincials, as I am confident we will make it.”

The Blues look forward to strong showing this season, the rough start they experienced is only one of the many setbacks teams inevitably face in a long year, but that doesn’t mean that their set goals will be unreachable.

“My personal goals for this season are just to improve my skills and be the best teammate on the field that I can be,” says Kirby.

While Carrillo adds, “try my very best every game to stay positive and play to the best of my ability.

I would love to make it to provincials. I know we all want it very bad.”

CAPU'S FOOD CONTRACT HAS EXPIRED Meggan Jacobson

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× Writer

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After 10 years, Capilano University’s exclusive food contract with Aramark is up, which now leaves students and faculty with the opportunity to voice what qualities they want to see in a food service provider.

Tiara Jung, Capilano’s FoodWorks coordinator says, “Students have said that the food that Aramark provided was expensive, neither local nor healthy and did not have many options for vegetarians, vegans, and people with other dietary health restrictions.” The exclusivity of the contract also prevented food that was not provided by Aramark from being brought into the university.

Two years ago, students started to take action by having conversations about the kind of food they envisioned on campus over potlucks at lunch.

These visions included the hope for local, sustainable and healthy food. As a result FoodWorks was formed, which is a group that is focused on trying to make the food at CapU more sustainable. Last year, CapU applied and got accepted to be one of nine universities part of the Campus Food System Project. Tiare Jung says the campus food group are “students bringing people together who make decisions about food and people who eat the food

and helping them come up with ideas and actions to make the food more local, healthy, sustainable and affordable.” Prior to launching FoodWorks, Jung found a lot of support for a community garden, which was built this past spring, located at the north end of campus, north-west of Maple building.

Now that the Aramark contract is now coming to an end, requirements in the new contract should reflect the values of the university. The company best able to meet these terms will win the new contract. For the past four months, FoodWorks has been consulting the campus community and collecting examples of best practices in the university food services to make recommendations for CapU’s new contract. Now that school is back in session, the university has formed a Request for Proposals Committee (RFP) to contribute to the terms of the contract and evaluate the bidders.

The RFP will be made up of a representative from the Capilano Students Union (CSU), a representative of the Canadian Office and Professional Employees Union (COPE), and a representative from the Capilano Faculty Association (CFA).

Mark Clifford, who is the director of contract ser-

vices at Capilano University, and constructed this committee.

“This is an opportunity to tell our food service provider that they need to work with us to put more affordable healthy, sustainable food on the menu Capilano has a lot of potential being located in Vancouver, surrounded by fertile lands and also by being able to learn from larger, local universities like UBC and SFU who have already gone down this road,” Jung says.

Brittany Barnes, CSU university relations officer, was appointed to represent the CSU by the Board of Directors and wants to make sure the students’ voices are heard. “Students voted not only to move forward with developing those [student run] services, but also agreed to increase their membership fees in order to make that possible. The first step in moving towards student-run food services, a common establishment at many universities, is to have the CSU made exempt from any contract where the university grants exclusivity to the future food provider,” Barnes explains.

These results were a part of the same referenda where students voted to keep the U-Pass. “The CSU as an independent, non-profit organization,

wants to reserve the right to decide what food options they’re going to have at their events…this is not only for the sake of options, but ordering through Aramark for catering is quite expensive and the way that the CSU pays for food is through student dollars,” says Barnes.

“The most responsible way to uses those fees and act in the best interests of the students is to have the option of ordering less expensive food for our events. Anything that stands in the way of that is counter-intuitive to our students want and need,” she continues.

There has been discussion of a possible smoothiebar as well as rumours of a an on-campus pub, but Barnes says “when looking at statistics, the majority of university pubs lose money, and these are larger universitiesw that have residency. If the university moves towards the idea of having residency, then a pub might be something to think about, but for now we have to start small.”

The CSU has been receiving resistance from the university on this issue of the CSU having an exemption to the contract. A meeting on Oct. 8 has been set between Clifford and Barnes to further negotiate this topic.

NEWS

NEWS EDITOR × KATHERINE GILLARD

NEWS@CAPILANOCOURIER.COM

legal opiates HEALTH CANADA APPROVES HEROIN FOR ADDICTION TREATMENT Steve Tornes The prescription of heroin by Health Canada began with a B.C.-based study to assess longer-term opioid medication effectiveness (SALOME). Shaf Hussain, spokesman of Providence Health, says, “[SALOME is] a clinical study to test alternative treatments for long-term heroin dependency and addiction. It’s testing the efficiency of hydromorphone (a licensed pain medication) and how treating heroin (diacetylmorphine) in addictive people through hydromorphone, whether that works or not.” Afterwards, if heroin is successfully replaced by the pain medication, the trial will determine whether hydromorphone can help addicts transition from an injection to an oral ingestion method, thereby reducing the user high.

Hussain says, “SALOME is a study led by researchers and investigators at Providence Health Care and in partnership with UBC.” He continues, “They had applied for research grants that they had received allowing them to undertake the study.” SALOME is looking at hydromorphone because of Canada’s reluctance to use heroin for long-term maintenance. It became imperative for researchers to find a legal equivalent. This has led hydromorphone to being a unique Canadian solution, used by no other country.

A portion of the study is completed, with some patients in the transition phase. This is where SALOME tries to find heroin alternatives for patients on their release from the trial. These alternatives include methadone – a heroin substitute – and drug-free or detox programs. One problem is that the participants chosen had already failed methadone treatments.

Overall, the study will use 322 patients, but for now, only 47 patients have completed the study.

Of those 47 patients, 35 were unable to transition out of heroin through the alternative therapies. If those hard-core addicts were let go, they could revert back to a dangerous lifestyle, with a high risk of committing crimes and contracting disease. The problem, according to the Canadian Drug Policy Coalition, is that “Canada remains the only country conducting a prescription diacetylmorphine [heroin] trial that has failed to provide diacetylmorphine to the research participants at the end of the trial.” Instead, regardless on the success of diacetylmorphine or hydromorphone on the patient, they would be placed in conventional and methadone treatments.

In an effort to reduce the high-risk lifestyle of these heroin addicts, doctors requested heroin prescriptions for those 35. On Sept. 20, Health Canada authorized heroin prescriptions for 16 patients “with serious or life threatening conditions when conventional therapies have failed, are unsuitable, or unavailable.” Hussain notes that the 19 patients who have not been authorized to have heroin, were not unauthorized, but that “their requests are outstanding.”

This has led to controversy. Federal Health Minister Rona Ambrose argued that the authorization “allows [the addicts] to continue to have access to heroin for their addiction even though other safe treatments for heroin addiction, such as methadone, are available.” Furthermore, the Minister argued that Heath Canada’s authorization “is in direct opposition to the government’s anti-drug

× Vivian Lui

× Writer

policy and violates the spirit and intent of the SAP (Special Access Programme).”

In response to Minister Ambrose’s points, the reason that heroin was approved was because, during and after the trial, conventional therapies had failed, including the use of methadone. These addicts were the most dependent on heroin. Furthermore, the authorization of heroin does not go against “the spirit and intent” of the SAP because, according to the SAP, “access is limited to patients … when conventional therapies have failed, are unsuitable, or are unavailable.” This means that since all other therapies had failed, they qualified for heroin under the SAP. In a separate study, patients who used heroin, compared to methadone, stayed in treatment longer, spent less time in relapse, and lived longer. It has been shown “that nearly 90 per cent of the participants who received heroin remained committed to the program, the same was only true for 54 per cent of those on methadone.”

Therefore, part of the debate of whether this goes

against the government’s anti-drug policy or not, is that providing heroin with treatment, might reduce drug use. Dr. Perry Kendall, B.C.’s provincial health officer writes, “SALOME addresses critical and ethical concerns dealing with addiction.

Opioid-dependent people are in need of treatment to avoid marginalization from the healthcare system and this study aims to answers questions that could lead to improvements in the health of persons with chronic addictions and identify new ways of reintegrating this population into society.”

According to SALOME, there are roughly 60,000 to 90,000 Canadians addicted to heroin, most of whom are at risk of disease, unemployment, and committing criminal acts. This is undoubtedly a serious issue, and one which Vancouver is trying to handle in its unique way. North America’s only legal safe-injection site (Insite), celebrated its 10year anniversary on Sept. 20 in Vancouver.

Shaf Hussain states that, contrary to popular opinion, “there is no relationship between SALOME and Insite. They are completely non-related. Insite is a completely different clinic, and its goal is for harm reduction and to provide heroin users a safe place to use their diacetylmorphine.”

This story has yet to be concluded. Minister Ambrose has said, “I am taking immediate action to … ensure this does not happen again.” This could be worrisome for the current 19 patients applying for the prescription, and for others participants in the study.

helping heroes make a difference STUDENTS AIM TO HELP SICK CHILDREN James Martin × Writer

To view the Ronald McDonald's Helping Hands' video or to make a donation to their fundraiser online, visit Capuwedo.kintera.org

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the campaign. "The main purpose of this project is that we wanted to not only help the families and help the people who are at Ronald McDonald House, but we wanted to create a community at Capilano. It's not just about the money, one of our other huge goals is to bring all the different faculties together towards one common goal that we've created. The response has been amazing. It just shows how many amazing people go to Capilano University, and if we can do this as a university there's nothing that we can't do." Incredibly, the group's ambition reaches well beyond the local scope of their current project. CapU We Do has been discussing the future possibility of helping to build schools in developing countries in the future.

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has put together a short video about their time volunteering at Ronald McDonald House and some of the kids whose families they've been helping.

It costs RMH about $75 per night to house each family who needs to stay there, making the helpers’ 365-day goal add up to a total of $27,375. It's made very clear in the video what a hugely positive difference this service makes in the lives of those who need it.

Hebden says that the fundraising has gone well so far. "We've had a great response, everyone's been really generous." The team is going to continue collecting donations for the next couple of weeks, working up towards their big final announcement on Oct. 18. "Daniel, one of our team members, has the chance to speak at Rogers Arena in front of all the students at We Day, so we're hoping he can announce that we met our goal, if not surpassed it."

As well as the obvious goal of assisting a worthwhile local cause, Hebden explains that there is also an additional layer of good intent built into

×

ing on raising money to send off to a charity, the project had a more hands-on approach that got the students directly involved with the people who they were helping. "We created a 60-day challenge.

Rather than going in once we did it three times a week for a couple months, and we felt a relationship with the people who work there and the families of sick kids. It got to the point where we brought in our parents to do it and we brought in Capilano University instructor Carolyn Stern to do it, and we kept doing it even though we were done our semester. We went again yesterday to cook dinner."

When the school year rolled around again this September, Hebden and Tajbakhsh started getting more classmates involved with their philanthropic endeavours. "We have a close relationship with the people at Ronald McDonald House now, so we wanted to do something more with the house. Our team name is CapU We Do, but we like to call ourselves Ronald's Helping Heroes for this project." As part of their fundraising efforts, the group

the capilano courier

If you haven't been skipping too many classes recently, you may have already met Sian Hebden, Kimia Tajbakhsh, and their fellow fundraisers who comprise the group Ronald McDonald's Helping Heroes. The Students are going classroom to classroom canvassing for donations as part of a fundraising campaign supporting Ronald McDonald House, which provides a place to stay for families of sick children who must travel to Vancouver for medical treatment. The Helping Heroes are aiming to raise enough funds to provide 365 days at Ronald McDonald House, an ambitious goal for a group who started out by making a difference on a much smaller scale.

"It started out in a leadership class with Carolyn Stern last semester. It was just myself and Kimia," Hebden explains, "our leadership project was to go out into the community and make a difference somehow, even if was just for a day. So we decided to work with the Ronald McDonald House, we had a fundraiser so we could go to the house and cook the dinners there." Rather than only focus-

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Columns

47 issue N o . 05 volume

× the capilano courier

× LEAH SCHEITEL

EDITOR@CAPILANOCOURIER.COM

gastronome's dilemma

CHANGE IN SEASONS, CHANGE IN DIETS

THE TERRIFYING CULTURE OF FOOD WASTE Scott Moraes

Columnist ×

Columnist ×

The change of season has arrived. I'm not sure about Vancouver, but here in the Kootenays, fall happened in one day. The weather was hot and sunny and beautiful, then all of the sudden summer it wasn't. Warm, bright mornings have been replaced by crisp, cool air and cold rainy days. The landscape has begun to make its transition from deep green to a cornucopia of gold, yellows, oranges and reds. Tank tops and jean shorts begin to collect dust and toques, long johns and sweaters take their place.

Fall brings a rapid changing of climatic conditions. The whole summer we sweat our pants off, and our body is in cooling-down mode. Then all of a sudden the temperature drops and our bodies are forced to do a 180, as the cold air robs our body of life and warmth. Drastic temperature changes are known to depress the immune system, especially when we are not prepared. Changing season affects us all in different ways. Some of us get a little down, feeling the impending winter at every corner and some of us get sick.

In traditional Chinese medicine, each season is ruled by a particular element and has a corresponding organ of the body. Fall is ruled by metal, which corresponds by the respiratory system and the large intestine. This means that if we don't take care of ourselves properly we set ourselves up for respiratory and digestive illness all winter long. Depression may also be a result of poor fall hygiene.

For many of us, despite the changing season, we continue to eat the same types of foods. In a world that gives us fruit every month of the year and refrigerators to preserve it, many of us give little thought to changing our diet in response to the changing seasons.

The rapidly changing season can be very hard on a body. If you find yourself coming down with influenza in the fall months, it might be time to take a good look at your fall diet. If you continue to eat summer foods, such as raw veggies, salads, smoothies and fruit, you are doing yourself a disservice. The foods have high water content and they will dilute cellular fluids, causing a cooling effect on the body. As your body pushes to bring your body temperature up, you push back against it. Eating these foods will make you freeze!

Eating seasonally is important for many reasons other than warmth. It is also crucial for maintaining vitamin D and calcium levels in the body. Dur-

× Desiree Wallace

Kendra Perry

ing the summer months, sun exposure causes our skin to produce vitamin D. Vitamin D is necessary for the absorption of calcium. Some of this vitamin D is used and some is stored in the liver, in a weak, inactive form.

During winter months, when your body desperately needs vitamin D, your kidneys are capable of converting this weak form of vitamin D into a much stronger form, increasing the absorption of calcium by up to 1,000 times. Your kidneys can't see outside the body to know that summer is over, so they rely on the ratio of potassium to get salt in your body.

All plants contain potassium. The more time a plant spends in the sun, the higher its potassium level will be – bananas are the best example of this. During summer this ratio will be in favour of potassium and your kidneys know it's summer and vitamin D activation is not needed. If you continue to eat a summer diet in wintertime, not only will you miss out on vitamin D, but you will quickly lose your calcium absorption. You can offset this phenomenon by cooking all your fruits and veggies and salting them with good quality sea salt.

Naturally, your body should begin to crave heavier foods. Don't fight this craving. The best foods to eat during the winter months are roasts, stews, soups, casseroles and bakes. Stay away from raw fruit, and veggies, fruits juices and raw salads.

Instead choose winter vegetables like yams, carrots, potatoes, beets, pumpkin, and squash. Drink plenty of hot drinks and make sure to include warming spices in your cooking like cloves, ginger, cinnamon, cardamom, garlic, fenugreek and cumin. These foods will nourish your body and set yourself up for success all winter long.

If you are a vegan or vegetarian, you need to take extra caution. In the northern hemisphere, humans are evolved to eat a diet heavy in meat and fat. While these types of diets can be healing and cleansing in the summer months, they can be very detrimental in the winter months if you are not careful. Eat as much good quality animal protein as possible, like eggs and fish, if you are a vegetarian. If you are a vegan, make sure to cook and salt all your foods, eat lots of lentils and beans and consume generous quantities of coconut and olive oil. Eat the foods that body desires for the season and see if you don't feel a little healthier this fall and coming winter.

Scott Moraes once picked out what kind of food we ate at an office lunch and it took over three hours to arrive. He loves and tends to his food with passion normally reserved for loved ones and cute things. In this column, he explains why he cares about his food, and why you should too.

I've always been amazed and annoyed at how fast my garbage bin fills up under my sink. It seems that most of us – myself included – attempt to sort out our waste (paper, plastic, food scraps...) but are still at odds with how to simply waste less.

Abundance and disposal are so deeply ingrained in our lifestyle that even attempting to single out the pieces of the larger issue is a daunting task.

Waste is a cultural issue, not something inevitable, inherent to all of us. Historically, methods of food preservation have been common cross culturally and remain a cornerstone of many cuisines.

Cheese originated as a method of preserving milk.

Same for yoghurt and other fermented milk products. Indian chutneys, jams and preserves, pickled herrings, salt cod, and smoked salmon are further examples. Now, all we seem to know how to do in terms of preservation is stuffing our freezers full of Ziplocs. Freezing has its benefits, but it does not add any flavour. In fact, most of the time, it damages flavour. Pickling, smoking, salting, curing, sweetening, on the other hand,. all seem to add flavour or texture as well as preserving. That's a bargain.

In terms of determining what's edible in the first place, we are also extremely and wastefully picky.

“Head to nose” butchery philosophies have been adopted for centuries in many cultures and have recently resurfaced all over the world, pushing for finding a use for all parts of any animal that are not just edible, but good edible, if we were able to get over our disgust to consume them. Sweetbreads, chicken hearts, pigs’ trotters, and crunchy bugs are perfect examples. When supermarkets or packing plants package beef, chicken, pork, or seafood (all the ordinary stuff), a lot of good edible parts get tossed or minced into mysterious blends.

Even the United States, now arguably the most wasteful nation in the world, was once very conscious of the need to waste as little food as possible.

The Great Depression and the onset of World War II, for example, spawned a series of propaganda posters with very clear messages. One by the US Food Administration simply listed: “Buy it with thought, cook it with care, use less wheat and meat, buy local foods, serve just enough, use what is left. Don't waste it!”

Another poster read “Plant a garden. It's thrifty, it's patriotic. Plant today!”

What's changed? Abundance has removed the need to always be prudent about food use. It's funny to mention abundance when millions of people are undernourished, but amount of food produced is not the issue there. The U.S. alone grows more than enough food to feed its entire population, but

× Camille Segur

crazy, happy, healthy

Kendra Perry skis, hikes, and rock climbs a lot. When not venturing around the mountains around Nelson, B.C., she is writing on her blog, Crazyhappyhealthy. com, where she turns her education into articles for others, and will be the inspiration for this column.

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COLUMNS EDITOR

surprisingly, over a third of it – or nearly half of it, according to some estimates – goes to waste. It is impossible to calculate a precise amount of waste, but even if you cling to the conservative percentage, the numbers are staggering, and can't possibly be “just the way things are.”

Waste happens on every link of the chain. Farms waste product that doesn't meet the aesthetic standard of buyers, damage and losses are incurred during transportation. Excessive and unnecessary packaging, supermarkets overstocking, restaurants serving massive portions, neglected leftovers in our fridges. It is indeed a long chain, tangled up pretty damn bad.

The range of suggested solutions is immense, but none seem to be successfully implemented.

One idea is for supermarkets to sell “sub-prime” products (nearing their point of no return) and mark them down. At my local IGA supermarket, the marked down products are practically hidden from customers as though it were embarrassing to sell them, and are placed on a shy little stand by the employees-only warehouse door. It took me months to notice it was even there. Most supermarkets don't even bother, and perfectly edible food ends up in the dumpster. Even the bringyour-own-bag campaigns taking place on nearly every supermarket seem to be falling short. It is appalling that such a simple idea would be so hard to take in.

For consumers, there's a big problem with semantics and understanding when something has, after all, become inedible. “Best before”, “sell by” and “consume by” are not the same at all (read them slowly and carefully), nor are they necessarily strict guidelines. If you can learn how to judge food edibility without needing to find the date, a lot less food will end up in the garbage. More frequent visits to the market, less food per visit does ensure less waste, despite the apparent inconvenience. If you'll allow for some advice, also label your food and leftovers, including stuff you put in your freezer, and then remember to, well, eat it. Also rotate things properly in your fridge.

The new goes to the back, the old stays up front so you eat it first.

Landfills are not the place for food scraps to end up. When food rots, it releases methane, a greenhouse gas more powerful than CO2. Instead, food waste should be composted and returned to the soil, even though garbage-collecting systems make it harder for people to compost. In the meantime, be patriotic, plant a garden, make some chutney, cook some “sub-prime” pieces of meat, and for the love of god, bring your own bags to the store!

Humans

bands that make her dance

HE DREAMS OF FOOD

GETTING OVER THE HATE Daniel Harf

Columnist ×

Columnist ×

Christine Janke is the kind of soul that cares for all of the ones around her. Her education in Human Rights from Malmo University in Sweden has allowed her to look at the world in a different light. Her Humans column will delve into human rights, and how Canada is in comparison to the world.

you – and what an asshole I felt like. I walked to the bar, got another drink, and was left with no other option but to try and like their West Coast sound. It wasn’t terribly original, but the players were good. The drummer’s snare sound was full and right in the middle of the backbeat. The percussionist’s enthusiasm was charming and became fun to watch after a while. I went to a show and had a good time because it wasn’t cool to hate all of the sudden, and I found something to enjoy about the show.

Maybe you think a band’s too “poppy”, the music is too depressing, or worse, you don’t like the way they dress. So what? The term “pop music” stems from popular music, which means a large demographic of people listen to and enjoy it. People can relate to dark music because they have gone through some rough times, and would like to connect to other human beings. Some people already hate on the band because of the type of crowd they attract.

It’s hard to connect with other people, and when you can find somebody else to focus your attention on, you don’t have to creatively express yourself.

It’s easy, and who doesn’t want to be closer to the oneness of humankind? Unfortunately, that’s how people paint themselves into cultural corners and form what has become an extremely clique-y Vancouver music scene.

There is a remedy for the affliction of compulsive hating. This works particularly well in the vulnerable state of hangover. You must be alone for the entirety of this process. wStep 1 - Sign into Netflix. If you don’t have an account one of your friends will, and you can both share it.

Step 2 - Look up the film Part of Me, a harrowing documentary of Katy Perry’s largest international tour.

Step 3 - Press play and do not distract attention until the film is finished.

Step 4 - Repeat Step 3 until when the credits roll up you are singing, at full volume: “California Girls, we’re unforgettable, Daisy Dukes, Bikinis on top….”

Don’t believe me? Well, if you’re still hating when it’s all done, you can hate on me.

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Haters love to hate, especially musicians about music. They love to find some piece of an otherwise solid set, head into a corner, and spend the rest of the night laughing sarcastically with each other about the band. I get it – you’re drinking in a room with a bunch of people who you don’t know and somebody else is the centre of attention.

You’re not a dancer, you don’t listen to anything but Americana, and you’re bored. Rather than take a second to find why the rest of the crowd is having such a good time, though, you form a negative opinion. That’s cool. Now who in the room isn’t clapping along at the lead singers behest. You find them, and they are wearing the same clothes as you. This is where you take a risk. Introducing yourself, you slip in a comment about how cheesy the backup vocals are. They laugh, albeit awkwardly. Now’s your chance to open up and impress them with your vast musical knowledge: “Have you heard Bonnie Prince Billy’s vocal arrangements with Dawn McCarthy on his album, Letting Go? It’s like coral reef burned by a clove cigarette.”

Vancouver’s music scene is very diverse. There are thriving bluegrass, jazz, folk, rock, heavy rock/ metal, neo-soul and world music scenes, to name just a few. Some nights the plethora of choices is not readily available and past 11 p.m. on a weekend night, most downtown venues have ushered out the live music with their fans to pump out DJ sets. Yet haters will endure long, multi-band bills in order to shit all over other artist. Then, when the set is all done, the hater smiles awkwardly and makes an insincere comment like: “good set.”

Being drunk is fun, damn it, and don’t you ruin that for me. If you don’t like the music, go home with a six-pack and listen to some you do like, or better yet, write some of your own. If you’re not willing to find anything you enjoy about the set, then there is little point to being there. .

I’m guilty of this, too. For many years I was a hater, and I can’t promise I won’t be in the future.

And right now, I’m shit-talking the haters. Less than a month ago, I was in Bellingham listening to an original band bearing a striking resemblance to Sublime. The percussionist had freshly spun dreadlocks and was twirling his shekere, centre stage. “Oh, this is perfect,” I thought. Trolling the room, I found a friend, nudged them and without speaking started cackling toward the stage in an obviously condescending way. They turned, looked at me blankly, and continued to watch the band. “What? You mean you actually enjoy this?”

Then I looked around and saw a bunch of people smiling, dancing and making out. If you can’t point out the asshole in the room, it’s probably

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term bandage on the wound that is hunger. What needs to be done actually involves negative duties: a withdrawal of harmful action imposed upon the public by those in power. Multinational corporations, the World Bank, many western governments and the international economic structure they participate in, benefit the wealthy and exploit the poor. The root of the problem of hunger, the infection that lies deeper and needs to be treated, is human greed. We need to change the economic policies that are causing the human race to function (or dysfunction) under such gross financial inequality.

The entire international economic structure of world trade and currency operates under rules constructed by western states. Highly indebted countries, given large loans from international banks to keep trade relations open in the postcolonial era, have to deal with imposed structural adjustment policies, which include trade barriers.

An uneven playing field exists on the world market today, and developing countries are the ones facing the economic disadvantage. Farmers living in rural, developing areas are at a higher risk for food insecurity, relying entirely on their agriculture for sustenance and income. They are simply unable to compete on the world trade market with government subsidized western farmers. Due to powerful political lobbying in the United States, largely subsidized farmers have been able to produce large crops, selling them at low market prices due to advanced technological machines and efficient, high-yield seeds. They put unsubsidized farmers out of business: small farms or those with little, or perhaps archaic, farming technology.

Those living below the poverty line, mainly women and children in rural communities having less than $1 a day, are lacking the economic access to actualize their right to food. Since man-made economic factors are actively causing hunger, it is definitely a preventable and controllable catastrophe. We must change the motives in human relations, treating people and international partners with fairness and honesty instead of cheating and lies. All humans deserve a chance to access to their most basic needs, including adequate nutrition. Throughout history, civilizations have risen and fallen, evolved and devolved. We are watching nations decline and the economic suffering of much of the world, all at the hands of humans themselves. We have a monstrous journey towards changing the policies of international institutions which fan the flame of poverty and hunger, but I believe our human will for justice to be greater than our human desire for greed.

Daniel Harf loves music so much that his shoelaces have music notes on them. Being an East Van native, he knows the ins-and-outs of the music scene in Vancouver and B.C. all too well, and with this column, will give us a glimpse into it.

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The number one preventable cause of death in the world is hunger, taking more lives each year than AIDS, malaria, and tuberculosis combined. Adding fuel to the fire, world food prices are currently soaring in light of a volatile global economy, making the question of food security and factors contributing to its violation more relevant than ever.

The Food and Agriculture Organization (FAO) reports 870 million people, or one in eight, do not have adequate food and are malnourished.

Each day an increasing number of people in developed and developing nations are facing financial hardship and poverty – both of which are main determining factors in an individual’s ability to obtain food. Food is a universal human right that is nowhere near being fulfilled. Attempts towards conquering hunger are even facing a remission in progress. The increasingly vast number of people living in hunger today, combined with an increasingly bleak global economic situation, makes the urgency of this inhumane crisis relatively clear.

As with any problem, it is most important to understand the main cause. What exactly is causing hunger to be such a large-scale humanitarian crisis? The U.N. reports an estimated eight per cent of the total hungry mouths are suffering due to natural disasters, war, climate change, and environmental factors. Why is it that the remaining 92 per cent of the nearly one billion hungry are lacking economic access to food?

Nine out of 10 people are hungry for monetary reasons. Arguably, the greatest explanation as to why hunger persists throughout the world is that international institutions of trade and economics, and western beneficiaries, control the terms. The neoliberal framework held within organizations, such as the World Bank and the International Monetary Fund (IMF), is an economic approach that breeds an environment of inequality. The relationship that exists between the poorest, most indebted nations of the world and global financial institutions – which began during colonialism – shed a light on understanding world poverty in today’s post-colonial world. Perhaps a new approach to fighting hunger needs to be considered amidst the insecure financial order we are all a part of.

With human rights come human responsibilities. Past humanitarian efforts to combat hunger have been under the positive duties category. These duties include positive action by aiding and providing through emergency response food supplies with a focus on the measurement of individual consumption of goods. While being moral, noble, and incredibly important in regards to war or the effects of global warming, food-aid is costly on global actors and nothing more than a short-

× Shirley Wu

Christine Janke

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Guest editorials national coming out day

× Cheryl Swan

National Coming Out Day, taking place on Oct. 11, is a day to bring awareness to the LGBTQA community. Coming out to your friends and family is a process, and many people hold their sexual and gender identity a secret from fear of possible rejection, persecution, or worse consequences. Just imagine hiding a key component of your identity or hiding the person you love since you are afraid how people will react or treat you. This is something many people have dealt with and continue to deal with and fear. This day celebrates who we are, in all aspects of our identity, and encourages people to proud about who they are. While it may be difficult to do, it allows people to be who they are and makes living their lives fuller and more rewarding. National Coming Out Day creates the space for this to happen, in the hopes that one day people won’t even have to come out all, and will be accepted regardless of different sexual or gender identities. Here are some coming out stories from students, faculty, and staff here at Capilano:

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Coming out is a story everyone experiences. It’s

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not just coming out as gay, or trans, but also just coming out as who you are as a person.

My coming out process doesn’t have a date, time or even just one story. It’s been a journey I’ve been on my whole life. Some people remember the day, the place, who they told, but for me as much as I didn’t know at five years old, or nine, or in my early teens. I knew my whole life.

At 16 years old, I kissed my best friend for the first time. My best friend happened to be a girl.

Everything changed from there on. I tried confronting her but she wouldn’t have it. Growing up in a small town made this hard for me to recognize, and I got made fun of in school, lost friends, and dated two more guys.

Then I met Danielle. She was from the island, 14 hours from my hometown, but we became best friends so quickly. We were young and we fell for each other, we made the distance work.

Coming out has so many different aspects. The biggest one is telling the people we love: our family, and our friends. Coming out to my family was, and still is, a process. Overall, my family loves me and wants me to be happy and have a successful life. My family knows, heck, when I walk into a room people know, that I am gay, but I am still coming out to them, waiting for the day I have my special someone around to bring them home.

Finally, coming out as who I am. People are so different in many ways: style, intelligence, sexual orientation, and gender identity. We are all on a journey to find out who we are, what we like, and who we will become. We change every day, and you aren’t the person you were last year and you aren’t the person you will be next year. I know

who I am today, right now, and that’s how I’ll live my life. Ask me how I identify right now, and trust me, things will change six months from now. I’m only 22 years old, and the question I think we all ask ourselves, “who am I?” Dixon West

I came out to my parents completely by accident. I had already been out to my friends at school for a few months, and started to get a bit sloppy on the “secret” at home. When I got home from a rather epic Valentine’s date, I left a card from my date on a table, and my parents saw it. They called me on it, I cried and general awkwardness ensued. This was all followed by a pretty awesome “we still love you” spiel. It took some time for them to get used to, but everything’s worked out pretty well, and I’m out and proud.

Christopher Girodat General Manager Capilano Student Union

I always planned how I wanted to come out to my parents, I just struggled with when I would be able to do it, and that was mostly due to fear. I wanted to sit them down separately and tell them, starting with my mom because I was always closer with her. My dad was the one I was truly scared of telling because I felt like I would be disappointing him and that he would be ashamed in [sic] me.

Earlier this year, it was my best friend/ex-boyfriend’s birthday and we went out to the club to celebrate. I had been drinking a lot this night and I ended up getting into a fight with him. This especially hurt me because I, of course, still had feelings for him. My emotions got the best of me and I broke down in the cab ride home and decided I really wanted to tell my parents that I was gay.

So as I walked into my parents bedroom at 3 a.m. while they were sleeping I yelled, “Wake up!” They were both dazed and confused as I stood in the doorway slightly swaying and in tears. “I’m gay...” those were the next two words out of my mouth before my mom woke up and rushed over to me.

My mom gave me a hug while my dad lay in bed – he was obviously pissed off. I had an hour-long discussion with my mom about everything and she confirmed everything was alright and that they both still loved me.

For about a month after the coming out, my dad and I barely spoke to each other and my parents had been arguing. There were talks of divorce, which did not exactly help me while I was currently taking a full course load and working a lot.

Eventually everything did calm down in my house and we got back to the way things used to be. I will say, though, that I wish I had done it in not such an abrupt way, I could have been a little easier on them.

David Fryer

I started coming out to friends in my early 20s, but went back in the closet for a decade after listening to the advice of a trusted counselor and a close friend, who both advised me that my emerging sexual identity was misguided. So, I soldiered on, and became partnered with a man for nearly a decade. While that relationship was friendly and respectful, I grew increasingly lonely, and over time, I realized that my loneliness was coming from my denial of my true self. Once I recognized this, the path forward was clear. Although I knew that coming out was the right thing for me to do, I still feared that I would face rejection and I agonized about how to tell people. However, my friends and colleagues have been supportive, and the few concerns that were raised by some family have been relatively simple to address. My mom was worried that coming out might negatively affect me at my workplace, which definitely has not happened. I love my job and have excellent students and colleagues. While I sometimes wish that I hadn’t taken so long to acknowledge and accept my sexual identity, I am glad that my experience of coming out was, in the end, relieving and celebratory. Now, I value and contribute to organizations like Out on Screen and Out in Schools, as I see the vital function of role models and mentors in the queer community. My coming out journey could have been much different if I had more queer people to look up to earlier in my life.

Ki Wight Faculty, Motion Picture Arts & Communication Studies

Throughout high school, I had always romanticized the idea of sitting all of my friends down at a nice brunch on graduation day and telling them all at the same time that I’m gay. We would all cry, my friends would tell me they obviously already knew, and it would be perfect. Apparently, my drunken self had different ideas, though. On New Years Eve in grade 12, one of my best friends was throwing a party and I got beyond drunk after showing everyone my best party trick: the ability to chug a mickey of vodka without passing out! Of course, I quickly needed to go vomit in the bathroom and while I was in there I had an epiphany: I should just tell everyone right then and there. I ran out of the bathroom and yelled out to everyone, “HEY GUYS I’M GAY AND I’M PROUD!” After the only response to my grand entrance was people pointing and laughing at the puke on my shirt I realized the music was too loud and no one had heard me. I then pulled all of my friends into the only place I could think of that would be quiet enough: the shower, of course. After squeezing everyone I possibly could into the shower and yelling “HEY GUYS I’M GAY AND I’M PROUD!” one more time I finally got the response my drunken, attention-craving self wanted: tears, smiles and congratulations. I could finally succumb to the overwhelming need to pass out, which was now my number one concern. My memory cuts out at me telling my best friend to call my mom and tell her that I was going to sleepover because I couldn’t make it home.

The next morning when I got home, my mom cornered me in my room and told me we needed to talk about that phone call she got last night.

Being underage, I assumed incorrectly that she was talking about the phone call my friend had made saying I was too drunk to come home. Little did I know that after my memory blanked out, I had called my mom back and told her my favourite line of the night: “I’M GAY AND I’M PROUD!” and then quickly hung up on her. So naturally, our conversation was very confusing and went like this: “So how long have you been like this?”

“I think I started drinking in like grade 10.”

“Oh, so it’s only when you’re drunk?!”

“Well yeah Mom I only pass out when I’m drunk, I’m not narcoleptic...”

The reactions I got were varied I am very fortunate that none were too hostile, and all of my family accepts and supports me to varying degrees. It has been a learning process for us all and I can say that they all celebrate me now for who I am.

Jon Kinsley Communications Student Queer Student Liaison

Brandon Ray

Coming out to my family happened in three very distinct steps since none of my family lived together. I was 21 and about to go on a trip to Honduras when I decided it was time to tell my sisters. I told the one I lived with first. We were on a camping trip and discussing our lives, when I told her "Jenni, I'm bisexual." Her response was unexpected "I've always been bi-curious and really hope to act on it in the coming years." I was shocked I wasn't alone, then, when I told my two older sisters and their responses were similar: "Yeah, sexuality's a spectrum I've always moved back and forth but never acted on it," and "That's great! I've had a couple relationships with women, I'm not sure if you've known." These reactions were welcomed yet unexpected.

I told my mom the moment I arrived home from Honduras after having a mentally abusive closeted relationship with a man. I had decided I didn't want to be in the closet any longer. This didn't go as smoothly. "You can't like both," "Just don't like children," and "I don't understand what I did wrong," were some of the statements she made.

I couldn't believe that she thought I was a pedophile. She took a long time to warm up to the idea and begin to understand but now she stands beside me and celebrates my life and position of Queer Student Liaison.

I was so scared to tell my dad after seeing my mom's reaction. My sister came along for support.

We sat him down for breakfast and I said, "Dad, I have something I need to tell you. I'm bisexual."

"Oh okay, like ladyboys in Thailand, I've talked with some of them."

That was it. He had nothing else he wanted to say or ask about, and quickly changed the subject to breakfast.

“Mom... I don’t like having sex with men anymore,” I told my mom over the phone, as I lay crying in the fetal position on the floor of the kitchen.

My mom’s response wasn’t what I expected. When she said, “I figured about three years ago,” I was so mad at her for not telling me sooner. This is how I came out to my mom in May of 2012 – I was 29 years old.

Some people ask me, “Have you always known you were gay?” The answer is yes. For the last 17 years, I have tried to live a straight life. I was horrible at it, mostly because I was never interested in men. I had crushes of course, but never wanted to be intimate with them. I would catch myself staring at girls, dreaming about kissing them, but I never had the courage to come out.

Growing up, I’ve always had an attraction to the female gender. I never put a label on my attraction for girls but I’ve always known that there was something there. When I became a teenager, I started dating boys because everyone was getting boyfriends and I felt left out. Now, I know this isn’t the reason why someone should date, for merely wanting to say that they had a significant other, but for the first few years of my dating life, that’s exactly what I did. I realized later that that wasn’t the most productive or healthy thing to do.

In the summer going into Grade 10, I played on the U15 Provincial Girls basketball team and realized I had the biggest crush on one of my incredibly flirty teammates. I didn’t know what was happening but it didn’t really bother me. I told a couple of my close friends that I liked a girl and a few of them even said they knew I was a bisexual.

I wasn’t a bisexual - I was very gay. Soon after, I dated another girl. We had been together for three months already when one day, my mom, a fourfoot-eleven beautiful, loving, yet so very intimidating, powerhouse of a woman asked me to take a seat in the living room. I was curious as to why she asked me to do this but complied and sat down.

“So when were you going to tell me about her?”

“What?”

My first kiss with a girl was incredible! It was just over a year ago. When she kissed me my stomach dropped into my gut and my heart started to beat out of my chest. I couldn’t believe what I was feeling and that I denied those genuine feelings for so long. It was amazing! I had no idea that coming out would be the best thing to happen to me.

“Your girlfriend. What did you think I was going to say? That I didn’t love you? That I see you differently?”

Since coming out, I have finally figured out who I am and where I want to go in my life. I don’t have to hide anymore or try to be someone I’m not. My connections with my family and friends have matured into wonderful relationships. I know that this doesn’t happen for everybody. I’ve known people that have lost their families after coming out to them. I am really lucky to have my friends and family in my corner, as well as a new family amongst the Queer Community in Vancouver.

My mom is, without a doubt, the best Mom that a kid could ever have. I felt guilty for not telling her before and hiding a big part of my life from her but she loved me still and still loves me unconditionally and without falter. I came out gradually, over a two- to three-year span, and it wasn’t always easy to tell people, but once I did, I felt more me than I ever had before. I felt freer and more able to express myself. No more hiding, I was me and I was never more happy to be just that.

Chase Daze Third-year, MOPA Program

Ashley Dela Cruz Yip

I started crying hysterically and my mom just hugged me for 15 minutes, while repeating “I love you.”

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The conversation carried, but then I saw the tears in her eyes and I knew the conversation was not where I thought it had been. After she explained to me what had happened I apologized for the way she found out but I told her that it was true

and I was happy she finally knew. Her initial reaction, based completely on stereotypes, showed to me how oblivious and uneducated she was about anything under the queer umbrella. At the beginning it was difficult to deal with her questions as they were both intrusive and laughably naive, but slowly and surely our conversations have become moderately normal and bearable. Learn from me though and don’t come out in a drunken stupor.

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csu results VOTES ARE IN

Social Activities Coordinator Jenna Theny - elected

Environmental Issues Coordinator Desiree Wallace - elected

Students with Disabilites Liaison Sean Stewart - elected

The voting period to fill the vacant positions on the Capilano Student Union's Board of Directors occured last week. These are the unofficial results that will be ratified at the Board of Directors meeting on Oct. 7.

Social Justice Coordinator Spencer Mc Murray - elected

First Nations Students' Liaison Michael Victor - elected

Women's Liaison Taylor Smith - elected

Education Issues Coordinator Brittany Barnes - elected

HEY YOU!

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FEATURES

FEATURES EDITOR ×

THERESE GUIEB

S P E C I A L F E AT U R E S . C A P C O U R I E R @ G M A I L . C O M

PEDESTRIAN SAFETY, IT'S A TWO WAY STREET B.C. CONTINUES TO STRUGGLE TO PREVENT HIT + RUN CASES

× Jacob Gauthier

Paisley Conrad

On Sept. 19, the Union of British Columbia Municipalities (UBCM) voted to update road signs, educate students on safe pedestrian behavior, and install photo radar in all police regulated-school zones. These speed cameras, in conjunction with the threat of heavy fines, were established to decrease the amount of speeding that occurs in school zones. On a yearly average, 2,000 pedestrians are injured while crossing the street and 30 per cent of all collisions are due to jaywalking.

LISTEN UP, PAL

In the case of an accident, ICBC offers substantial coverage of up to $200,000 in accident benefits.

These payments can go towards medical treatment, wage loss, and a suffering compensation. If it is not the driver/pedestrian’s fault, they do not have to pay the obligatory deductible fee for the damages.

Adam Grossman, ICBC representative states that “what a lot of people don't realize is that those at fault also receive financial assistance, if they have the proper coverage. ICBC protects its clients.”

Most jaywalkers do not have to deal with any consequences for their actions. However, a handful of people still receive tickets for their recklessness and there are those who have to pay the ultimate price – death.

On Aug. 7, a pedestrian was jaywalking across the Langley Bypass at three in the morning. He was hit in the middle of the road by a semi-truck, and

47 issue N o . 05

SHARING THE BLAME

YOU WANT TO LIVE, RIGHT?

Though being responsible for a crash will affect a driver’s insurance negatively in the long run, it's less damaging than leaving a crash site without exchanging information.

Hit-and-run doesn't apply solely to pedestrianvehicle crashes. If a driver walks away from their vehicle and returns to find obvious vehicle damage, that is also considered a hit-and-run, and is covered by ICBC. To claim a hit-and-run case, a police report must be filed, including all information that you might possibly have about the damages and the perpetrator.

UBCM voted on Sept. 19 to install speed cameras in school zones. But this decision hasn’t fully received a warm reception from the public. Edie Conner, a long-time driver, says that “it's an inexpensive way for the police to bank a ton of money without doing much. There's no proof of its accuracy and it's unfair because it targets a vehicle, not a driver.” She points out that “speed cameras can be altered.” However, though technology has developed to the point where photos can be altered, the protection on the speed cameras will also be updated, to hinder potential hackers.

ICBC advises that all pedestrians be as cautious and aware as possible – wear bright clothing, look left and right for oncoming traffic, and walk on the left side of the road so that they are facing traffic when they are walking on a road that has no sidewalk. They also warn drivers to be anxious of unsafe pedestrians, and to make eye contact whenever possible. Non-verbal communication is key to ensuring safety for everyone.

Though jaywalking is the easy way out, in the words of Grossman, “it's not a smart thing to do, especially when there are better options. It takes 30 seconds to a minute to find a designated crosswalk or intersection, and it isn't that much of an inconvenience.”

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was killed on impact. The driver reportedly did not receive any charges, as the accident was the fault of the pedestrian. The Langley Bypass turns into the Fraser Highway, where Van Haastregt received his jaywalking ticket just a month earlier.

The police regularly investigate vehicle-pedestrian collisions, and jaywalking is often a contributing factor. "It goes without saying that the risk of injury to a pedestrian in a collision with a vehicle is much higher than to the driver," said Corporal Doug Trousdell, spokesperson for the North Vancouver RCMP. "Crossing at designated crossing points is a simple choice that can keep pedestrians safer on the roadways. Basically, don't make reckless decisions, and you won't have consequences to deal with." If a pedestrian is injured by a vehicle in transit while jaywalking, the Insurance Corporation of British Columbia (ICBC) will most likely place the blame on the pedestrian.

Oftentimes, when a pedestrian jaywalks and gets into a crash that is their fault, the driver will simply drive away in a panic. Even if a pedestrian crash was truly not a drivers’ fault, there is a stigma associated with pedestrians and their rights. It is often understood that the pedestrian always has the right of way, regardless of their behaviour. However, each pedestrian-vehicle collision is reviewed individually to determine the fault in the most just manner possible.

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are typing away on their phones, and don't even notice that cars are honking and swerving to miss hitting them.”

The average jaywalking ticket ranges from $100 to $160, depending on the time and the cop’s assessment of the danger that the pedestrian risked on the road.

Surrey resident Brad van Haastregt received a ticket over the summer after crossing a two-lane highway in Langley. He reports that his intention was to cross to a parking lot which was directly across from where he was standing. “I wasn't about to walk for five minutes to find a crosswalk just to walk five minutes back on the other side of the street to get where I needed to be. That's ridiculous. There are 14 block stretches where there just aren't any intersections or crosswalks, and it seemed really silly and inconvenient to go out of my way to just literally cross 40 yards. Traffic was pretty light and the cop was just sitting in the parking lot and gave me a ticket.” The ticket was roughly $150, which was promptly paid because the penalty for not paying a jaywalking ticket is a court appearance.

However, a court appearance does not always mean heavier fines. According to Erik Magraken, personal injury lawyer, “when folks decide to go ahead and dispute charges, a charge has potential to be cleared.” If witnesses are unavailable for comment, or if the evidence is unsound, a pedestrian is likely to get off scot-free.

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Jaywalking is defined as illegal or reckless pedestrian road crossing. According to the Motor Vehicle Act, section 180, “the driver of a vehicle must yield the right of way to a pedestrian where traffic control signals are not in place or not in operation.”

It is stated that “a pedestrian must not leave a curb or other place of safety and walk or run into the path of a vehicle that is so close it is impracticable for the driver to yield the right of way.” In other words, the driver has to maintain a reasonable level of caution and the pedestrian has to do the same.

While crossing out into the middle of the street is the most universally acknowledged mode of jaywalking, it isn't the only kind. Walking against a pedestrian walk signal and walking outside of the marked crosswalk area also constitute as jaywalking. The majority of jaywalkers are cautious and mindful of the level of traffic on the road. The argument can be made that when there is no traffic in either direction, the risk that a jaywalker is taking is very minimal and it should be allowed.

However, many pedestrians wander into the street with little awareness and their reckless behaviour makes them prone to collisions. Capilano University professor Greg Robinson states that “if you sit and watch the intersection between Davie and Denman for 20 minutes, you will see countless people crossing against the lights.” He continues, “sometimes pedestrians have their head down and

× Writer

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FEATURES

FEATURES EDITOR ×

THERESE GUIEB

S P E C I A L F E AT U R E S . C A P C O U R I E R @ G M A I L . C O M

× Arin Ringwald

DEATH OF SCIENCE

HOW THE BUDGET CUTS + NEW POLICY ON SCIENCE AFFECT CANADA'S ENVIRONMENTAL RESEARCH

Romila Barryman

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× Writer

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The rally in the defense for science on Sept. 16 outside of the Vancouver Art Gallery addressed the concern of the budget cuts for Canada’s science department. Vancouver was one of 17 cities who participated in the national “Stand Up For Science” protests. Tzeporah Berman, author of These Crazy Times and co-director of Climate and Energy Program Greenpeace International, says this showcase of awareness shows great strength in the community and that the Harper government has created “the perfect storm.”

The campaign, organized by Evidence for Democracy, pushed for a scientific-based budget evaluation and had over 400 attendees in Vancouver.

“I have never been a part of a rally that was so diverse in educational and career backgrounds, but so clear and rooted in our stance and understanding of the protest,” says rally participant, Ashley Halperin.

Scientists and supporters of science spoke out against three main issues, which were research facility closures, suppression of information, and federal financial cuts to jobs that have been dis-

appearing over the past few years alone. Speakers took the time to concentrate on West Coast issues such as the Enbridge Northern Gateway Pipeline.

The pipeline, which was proposed in November of 2008, is still pending despite receiving little public support. “How can we make an informed decision on the future of the Northern Gateway pipeline and the consequences of a major oil spill if we don’t have the best scientific evidence?” famed activist and scientist David Suzuki asked during the rally. He continued by calling the situation “baffling” and that the government is acting “out of sight [and] out of mind.”

The Organization for Economic Co-operation reported that without adaptation, total annual losses from flooding could top $1 trillion by 2100.

Some federally funded facilities that were halted in financial support included those dedicating their research to global warming. “It means that our capacity to understand the impact of the environment is drastically limited,” says Berman. ”It also means that our ability to understand climate change is being cut off at the knees.”

FACILITY CLOSURES Over the past two years, Canada is reported to have lost approximately 10 per cent of researchers with federally funded positions. The Professional Institute of the Public Service of Canada (PIPSC) reports that federal scientists and others employed by federal government departments have had over 5,332 of their members laid off or transferred to other duties. 436 scientists at Fisheries and Oceans Canada and 139 scientists at Environment Canada are included in that number, since the passing of Bill C-38 over a year ago. The research facility was initiated as a clean water commitment on an international level, as well as to First Nations, Métis, and Inuit. “It's not just a restriction in budget,” says Berman. “The Experimental Lakes Area, which has been critical in understanding our fresh water and clean up in the great basin – especially focus on the tar sands – was not an expensive body.” The initiative, which was run by the Fisheries and Oceans Canada, was internationally regarded as a source of aquatic information and cost total of $2 million to fund a year. The passing of Bill C-38 in 2012,

authorizing the closure of The Experimental Lakes Area, was reported to cost Fisheries and Oceans Canada approximately $50 million.

The Centre of The Universe, an astronomy education facility based in Ontario run by the NRC Herzberg Institute of Astrophysics, was reported to have closed this September after the $250,000 annual budget was cut. The observatory’s educational public program allowed thousands of students to use the facility’s telescope, which reigned as the biggest in the country, and receives over 10,000 visitors annually. However, the National Research Council reported that the centre brought in annual revenue of $47,000. NRC spokesperson, Patrick Bookhout, also reported a $900 million increase in budget in efforts to rebrand as a technology organization with more industry-focused research.

“Much of that money has been earmarked to help small and medium-sized enterprises develop technology and bring it to market,” said Bookhout in an interview with Metro.

Science supporters and activists were surprised to find National Roundtable on Environment

and Economy (NRTEE) among the list of facility closures, a key green energy project initiated by the conservative government about 16 years ago.

NRTEE’s Climate Prosperity series, the first initiative to estimate of the national economic impacts of climate, reported over $36 and $58 billion per year would be spent on flooding, degraded timbre and increased health care cost by the year 2050.

There is a five per cent chance that the costs will escalate as high as $91 billion per year. The passing of Bill C-38 abolished the Kyoto Protocol Implementation Act, which allowed detailed reports on Canada’s climate change goals by NRTEE, including plans around carbon pricing. “Canada can have a stronger economy if we have a lower carbon economy,” explains Berman. “Putting a price on pollution will greatly benefit the economy. So why aren’t we doing so?”

Greg Rickford, Canada’s minister of state for science and technology, failed to respond to requests for an interview with the Courier. However, he stated in a release after the rally that “[the Harper government] is committed to science, technology, innovation, and taking ideas to the marketplace.

Canada is ranked number one among G7 countries for its higher education expenditures on research and development. We are building on these successes to improve the quality of life of Canadians and to create jobs, growth and long-term prosperity.”

“As a mother, the cuts to environmental research and public interest research and the elimination of criminal laws makes me very worried for my children,” says Berman, “as an environmentalist I’m extremely frustrated. Many environmentalists across this country can't do their work.”

CRITICISM Most recently, the issues surrounding science and the government has leaked outside of an immense national response and caught international attention when the New York Times editorial criticized the Harper government for allegedly silencing public scientists to ensure oil sands production.

“Over the last few years, the government of Canada — led by Stephen Harper — has made it harder and harder for publicly financed scientists to communicate with the public and with other scientists,” the article reads. “There was trouble of this kind here in the George W. Bush years, when scientists were asked to toe the party line on cli-

mate policy and endangered species. But nothing came close to what is being done in Canada.”

The article goes on to describe the government’s attempt to "monitor and restrict the flow of scientific information, especially concerning research into climate change, fisheries and anything to do with the Alberta tar sands – source of the diluted bitumen that would flow through the controversial Keystone XL pipeline.”

The Guardian looked closely at the 25th anniversary of the Montreal protocol and the halt in federal funding to Environment Canada’s Ozone Science Monitoring Department. “Thousands of people have avoided getting skin cancer thanks to Canadian scientists who invented the UV index and the gold-standard tool for measuring the thickness of the Earth's Ozone layer. But now Canada's Ozone Science Group no longer exists, victim of government budget cuts.”

However, according to Dan Robb, river engineering expert in North Vancouver, there may be a benefit to these cuts. “During my time on the Board of Parks and Recreation I found that employees were overpaid and doing only 50 per cent of the work that they could have done,” he explains. “Maybe there is room for cuts in certain areas and reforms in others.”

TRENDS + STATISTICS Statistics Canada reports that spending of research and development in the science and technology field is projected to decrease 3.3 per cent from the previous period, to $10.5 billion in the 2013-2014 fiscal year. The federal agency also shows a steady decrease on science and technology spending since 2009-2010.

In early May, the Science, Technology and Innovation Council released their bi-annual measurement of the science and technology performance of Canada in comparison to the world. “With a share of only 0.5 per cent of global population, Canada [accounts] for 4.4 percent of the world’s natural sciences and engineering publications in 2010,” the data finds. “This positions Canada eighth after countries with significantly larger populations: the U.S., China, Germany, the United Kingdom, Japan, France and Italy.”

However, the panel then wrote, “with their significant investments in research and higher education, other countries are catching up and overtaking Canada.”

ON the Cover Arin Ringwald

Last year’s Economic Action Plan committed to support communities on a national level and spent $150 million over two years for recreational buildings, local arenas, community centres, and more.

Included in the list of supported facilities is the Seymour River Hatchery and Education Centre, which, at the end of September, received a total of $112,300 in federal funding. The initiative to support for the facility is under the Harper government’s Infrastructure Improvement Fund (CIIF).

The press release reads a quote from Vice President of the Seymour Salmonid Society, Matt Casselman, who stated that “the improvements will ensure that the Seymour River Hatchery can continue to offer vital community services well into the future.”

The improvements proposed for the hatchery and education centre include a new roof, skylight and upgrades in equipment and salmon ponds.

Parliamentary Secretary Saxton is quoted on the official press release, on the focus behind the funding. He said that "our government is committed to creating jobs, growth and long-term prosperity in our communities across Canada… By making this investment in upgrading the Seymour River Hatchery and Education Centre, we are helping to boost economic activity and maintain a high quality of life for residents of North Vancouver."

Residents and activists have critiqued this move as a way to deflect from the current cuts. Halperin, who is also a North Vancouver resident, says she is skeptical. “As far as I’m concerned, we haven’t heard from them in a manner that addresses our

SCIENTISTS TAKE ACTION The “Stand Up For Science” petition to the House of Commons, advised that “advancing scientific discovery and human knowledge is central to our Canadian identity” as well as “conservative cuts to basic science and fundamental research harm longterm economic growth by slowing innovation and our move to a knowledge based economy.”

“Scientists serve as an early warning system to Canada. We are the ones who are closely watching how the environment is changing, monitoring species, following invading species and following and tracking diseases,” shared Sarah Otto, UBC evolutionary biologist and MacArthur Fellowship recipient, during her speech at Stand Up For Science Vancouver.

“Canada can ignore this early warning system, but personally I don’t want that, and I don’t think anyone else wants that either. We want to know the risks and potential solutions to the problems we are facing. We want scientists to speak their findings and their concerns openly,” she continued.

“This is a case where the government is muzzling scientists from releasing information and sending out press releases when it doesn’t agree with their viewpoints,” says Robb.

“If I was sitting in a discussion with the Harper government, I would ask them to reinstate 40 years of environmental laws and stop the expansion of tar sands,” says Berman. “It's important to note that this is a critical issue for Vancouver. They are proposing a new pipeline right in our backyard that would increase oil tanker traffic here. People need to write to their MPs and MLAs, and voice their opinions.”

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47 issue N o . 05

Arin Ringwald is a graduate from CapU's IDEA Program. We are super stoked to have Arin's art on our pages.

Check out his extension of awesome at Aringwald.com

A HOPEFUL DEVELOPMENT

points and situation. We want to know what’s going to happen to the science community as a whole in the near future because that looks like it’s dying right now.”

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Canada’s commitment to act on climate change on the government of Canada website reads, “the Government of Canada is making progress towards our ambitious target of reducing Canada's total greenhouse gas emissions by 17 per cent from 2005 levels by 2020 through a sector-by-sector approach aligned with the United States where appropriate.”

As a speaker alongside David Suzuki, who criticized Harper’s changes as a push for the proposed Northern pipeline, Berman says the time to protest and make demands is now, more than ever.

“The Harper government needs to give Canadians a choice about what our economic future looks like. They need to make sure they are developing policies for the public and not just corporations.”

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Tuesday 08

Wednesday 09

Thursday 10

Friday 11

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The Zombie Syndrome

Hedwig + the Angry Inch

Gary Clark Jr.

Eco Fashion Week

Location information provided via phone 6:30 - 8:30 pm $25

The Cobalt 7:00 pm - 8:30 pm $15 - 45

The Commodore Ballroom 8:30 pm $29.50

Robson Square 7 pm $20-75

It seems like Vancouver just can’t get enough of zombies, but unlike the annual Zombie Walk, you’re the zombie slayer instead of the zombie. Using your smartphone, be ready for a roving adventure as you partake in a theatrical scavenger hunt to defeat zombies on the streets of Vancouver.

Go to the Cobalt to see one of the sauciest and most hilarious LGBTQ musicals about Hedwig, a German transsexual rock star and his sex-change operation gone awry. See Hedwig and his “angry inch” as they rock through capitalist America in search of love after heinous genital reconstruction and heartbreak. It’s truly amazing.

Move over, Charles Bradley. Gary Clark Jr. is soul music’s real renaissance man. This Texas-based blues singer/guitarist has BB King, Eric Clapton and Buddy Guy – and frankly, he gives them a run for their money. Don’t believe us? See for yourself tonight.

In its seventh year, Eco Fashion Week informs and inspires the fashion-conscious and sustainable-minded in a way that harmonizes beauty and the environment. Speaker seminars, industry panels, and fashion shows are just a few of the highlights.

Inside the Seed

V.V.N.S. Community Potluck

Canucks vs. Devils

Father John Misty

The Cultch 8 pm $28

Heritage Hall 6 - 9 pm $ - free

Rogers Arena 7 pm $91-300

The Commodore Ballroom 9:30pm $22.50

Foster Bryant is a great scientist who makes a startling discovery when he genetically modifies a new kind of rice in this sci-fi-ish play put on by the Cultch. A giant present-day bio-tech firm is where Foster must plunge down the rabbit hole in a desperate bid to uncover the truth that lies inside the seed. We smell a morality tale on our hands.

Let’s hope there are as many food samples as there are words in that event title! Kidding.

Hopefully there are more. The Village Vancouver Neighbour Savour Potluck event celebrates food and community with homemade dishes, live local music, community tables, children's activities, a gift exchange, and a seed library/swap. For more information, email ns4@villagevancouver.ca

Pay too much to see the Vancouver Canucks take on the New Jersey Devils in National Hockey League action, spill $10 beer on your neighbour when you get up to angrily express hate to the referee, and then maybe set some cars on fire in riotous protest. Just kidding. No, actually we are not.

Ok, Father John Misty, also known as Josh Tillman, former drummer of indie-folksters Fleet Foxes, has been touring the same album (Fear Fun) for two years but is anyone really sick of it yet? I’m not. But I think this might be the last show I can handle if he doesn’t make another album pretty soon.

Bio/Graphic: Autobiography in Comics

This Aint Yo Momma's Bingo

Boobies & Wieners

Mickey Avalon

Seymour Art Gallery 10 a.m. to 5 p.m $ - cost of Comic Book Knowledge

The Hyde 8:30 pm $ - free

Hot Art Wet City (2206 Main) 12 pm – 5 pm $ - free

Fortune Sound Club 10 pm $20.00

Six Metro Vancouver artists – Sean Karemaker, Sarah Leavitt, Miriam Libicki, Megan Speers, Jason Turner, and Colin Upton – share their life stories through graphic novellas, or comics, in this local exhibition. This exhibition is co-curated

by Seymour Gallery curator Sarah Cavanaugh and guest curator Luke Krienke.

This Ain’t Yo Momma’s Bingo is a twist on the classic pastime and will have everyone getting in on the action. Two scantily clad local burlesque dancers call for the dirtiest five letter words you can think of –instead of boring ol’ “Bingo” at the senior’s legion. Come prepared for funny, sexy and unexpected things to happen which could win you prizes and free drinks!

“Boobies & Wieners” is a group show featuring immature, crass, explicit, cartoonish, odd and whatever else is the opposite of “classy” art featuring nude subjects. It’s pretty self-explanatory really: remember that drawing in the bathroom stall of that gas station on the Trans-Canada Highway? Or the drawings in the margin of your school textbook? You get the idea. Featuring over 60 mostly local artists!

Remember that song “My Dick” from the second Harold and Kumar flick that has one rapper comparing his dick to Jesus in effort to prove his dick is bigger than yours? One time, I rewrote this song from a female’s perspective… ‘cause my tits are nice and perky and your tits hang like the waddle on a turkey. Oh yeah, and the guy who wrote that song is playing tonight.

The Hot Flashes

Peak Performance Showcase Series

Ladies Night

Rock + Roll High School

Landmark Cinema, New West 6:00 pm + 9:00 pm $25

Fortune Sound Club 8:30 pm $12

Pink Elephant Thai 5:30pm - 10:30pm $ - free

Club 23 9pm - 2am $ - free

Canadian Cancer Society Fundraiser hosts a private screening of the new Brooke Sheilds comedy , The Hot Flashes. Pre-sold tickets include the movie, a glass of Hot Flash wine from Kelowna’s House of Rose Winery, sweets, coffee/tea, door prizes and a raffle during the reception.

In installment four of the Peak’s annual showcase series, Fortune Sound Club hosts performances by local indie acts Dougal Bain McLean, Coldwater Road, Bodhi Jones, and Lions in the Street.

All have a shot at winning the $102,700 grand prize. Clever, right? Because their radio frequency is 102.7. Get it?

Just launched, every Thursday at Pink Elephant Thai will be Ladies Night with $6 Skinny Girl Martinis and Cocktails and $8 Tapas Share Platters… I’m not sure in which world $6 drinks are a steal, or $8 appies is a deal, but hey, we might as well. The house DJ will be spinning Top 40, R&B, Old School and ‘80s tunes.

Every Thursday night, Rock & Roll High School comes to Gastown. The regular DJs include Jonny Vancouver, Evilyn 13 and Pandemonium, who play everything from old Bowie to new Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Stray Cats to Tool. Eclectic, kind of like your music tastes in high school. Hopefully they’ll pull out some Ramones albums, too.

Machete Kills Opens

Stanley Park Ghost Train

Western Canada's Scariest Haunt

Turkey Dinner

A Theatre Near You All day $12

Stanley Park Train 6 pm – 10 pm $11

Playland 7 pm $25

Thunderbird Community Centre 6 pm $2/person or $6/family

Machete Kills is the second of a proposed trilogy of "Machete" movies, and it debuts in theatres today. Director Robert Rodriguez says this one has "a space element … we’ve given the character a much bigger playground. It’s going to be like a James Bond movie, with a Bond-style villain."

Ok, as long as there’s no Lohan in this one.

I seriously want to borrow someone’s kids so I can take them to the Stanley Park train ride. Anyone?

As a kid, I loved being scared crap-less by stuff like this. Screaming in public, as an adult, is a little more humiliating. I can’t do that as an adult, alone. It just seems weird and lonely and/or predatory. Almost as predatory as stealing someone’s kids to take them on a train ride…

Face your fears. Fright Nights possesses Playland features six fright houses, 12 rides, and the freaky sideshow, The Monsters of Schlock. This shit is actually horrifying and you should probably only attend if you have a penchant for blocking things out of your memory.

Celebrate Thanksgiving with the friendly community that is the Thunderbird Youth Council.

Games and activities are available for the children, and a family movie to follow after dinner. Register soon as there are limited seats.

Grave Trails

Raw Talent

Bellingham Comi-con

Cookbook Swap

Fort Langley 7 + 8 pm $15 - 10

Scotiabank Dance Centre 6 pm $ - free

Ferndale Events Center 10 am - 5 pm $7 American Dollars

Trout Lake 12 pm – 5 pm $ - free

Another hype-y Halloween tradition is back: the popular Grave Tales historic walking tours in historic and haunted Fort Langley! Spine-chilling stories are depicted at night by our expert storytellers as you walk through the Fort Langley village.

Raw Talent showcases every photo taken by the 60 participants of the 12x12 Vancouver Photo Marathon, which took place on Aug. 31 on Commercial Drive. With 12 themes, 60 photographers and 720 film photos, photo enthusiasts, art lovers, and Vancouverites of all ages are welcome to experience this unique one-night-only event in a stunning venue.

Skip across the border to the fifth annual Bellingham Comicon, including appearances by artists and writers such as Randy Emberlin (SpiderMan), Bob Smith (Archie Comics), Doug Wheatley (Star Wars), Michel Gagne (animator for Pixar, Disney, and Warner Bros), and Kat Richardson (author of the Greywalker series). Grab some cheap booze while you’re out there!

Back by popular demand, swap your rarely used books for something new to you. I’ve been looking for the cookbook by the guy who hosts Diners, Drive-ins and Dives, so if you’ve got it and it’s collecting dust, please bring it. I’ll bring my “Hormone Diet” book, but let’s be honest – it’s a crock… pot.

Thanksgiving Sunday

Young Frankenstein

The Hollow

East Bound + Down

Your Parents’ House Around dinner time $ - cost of a Turkey

Waterfront Theatre 2 pm $19-34

Metro Theatre ( 1370 S.W. Marine) 8 pm $22-25

HBO 10 pm $ - cost of HBO (which is a lot)

It seems to me we should probably cancel Thanksgiving since, you know, we just had Reconciliation Week and all. Or maybe we should change the holiday to “We’re Sorry Day”. Well, let’s eat turkey, too much cranberry sauce, and various forms of potatoes anyways. Bring on the winter weight!

Mel Brooks's new musical – based on his ‘80s film – tells the tale of the bright young Dr. Frankenstein as he attempts to complete his grandfather's work and bring a corpse to life. Just in time for Halloween!

Metro Theatre presents the Agatha Christie murder mystery, the Hollow. This tells the tale of Dr John Christow, a successful physician who allows his young daughter to tell his fortune with cards.

When the death card is drawn, the appearance of an old flame at The Hollow seems to be the link in a chain of fatal circumstances.

Super crass-mouthed, slimy, washed-up ex-Baseball pro Kenny Powers (Danny McBride) is back in the fourth season of East Bound and Down.

This season seems to suggest that Powers is settled down with a wife and kids, but it won’t be long until La Flama Blanca is back to his old ways.

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@capilanocourier

arts + Culture

A + C EDITOR ×

ANDY RICE

ARTS@CAPILANOCOURIER.COM

songs worth taking note of CANADIAN SONGWRITERS BUILD A GROWING LEGACY Andy Rice What do Pat Benatar’s “Hit Me With Your Best Shot”, Miley Cyrus’ “Wrecking Ball” and the Weather Girls’ “It’s Raining Men” have in common? Not only are they career-defining hits for American recording artists, but all were written

by Canadian composers.

While famous performers like Shania Twain and Justin Bieber have certainly drawn the world’s eyes to Canada in recent years, many of our lesserknown musicians have also made some significant contributions of their own.

Not only does Canada export many of its biggest artists, but a great deal of its biggest songs as well. “Hit Me With Your Best Shot” was written in the late 1970s by Toronto singer-songwriter Eddie Schwartz, while “Wrecking Ball” was a more collaborative effort, co-written just a few months ago by St. Catharines-born pianist Stephen Moccio and four others. And though it’s rather surprising, “It’s Raining Men” is attributed to a man best known as David Letterman’s bandleader and sidekick, Paul Shaffer.

Other examples can be found in abundance.

Neil Young famously wrote “Lotta Love”, which became a hit for Nicolette Larsen in 1978. “She’s A Lady”, a song made popular by Welsh singer Tom Jones, was written by Canadian crooner Paul Anka, who also came up with the English lyrics for Frank Sinatra’s iconic rendition of “My Way”. In the commercial rock genre, Vancouver Island-born producer Brian Howes has penned a number of chart-topping songs for bands like Daughtry, Skillet, Hedley, Boys Like Girls, even teaming up with

Chris Cornell to write “Light On”, the first single

by American Idol winner David Cook.

Arguably the most prolific Canadian songwriter of all is David Foster, at least when it comes to composing hits for American artists. In 1979, the Victoria native co-wrote “After the Love Is Gone”, which soon became a signature ballad for Earth Wind and Fire. Taking over production duties for the band Chicago in 1981, Foster co-wrote several of their biggest chart-toppers as well, including “Hard to Say I'm Sorry / Get Away” and “You're the Inspiration”. In 1986 came “GrownUp Christmas List”, which was made famous by Natalie Cole, and in 1998 he topped the charts once again with “The Prayer”, a powerful duet featuring Canadian Celine Dion and Italian Andrea Bocelli. Other collaborations over the past 30 years have yielded hits for Boz Skaggs, Kenny Loggins, Peter Cetera, Chaka Khan, LeAnn Rimes, Destiny’s Child, Josh Groban, and more.

Around the same time Foster was in Los Angeles working with Chicago, Jim Vallance was in a Vancouver basement collaborating with a young Bryan Adams. One of their earliest co-writes, “Cuts Like a Knife”, was released in 1983 on an album of the same name, and the track brought the pair some airplay in the United States. “Summer of '69” followed in 1984, launching Adams to international fame. Soon after, Vallance began to find himself in demand not only in Canada but south of the border as well, although he admits “It wasn't a deluge...”

“It took a while to break out of Canada,” he con-

tinues. “I started writing with Bryan Adams in 1978, but it wasn't until ‘Cuts Like A Knife’ in 1983 that we finally got some radio play in the States. After that my phone started ringing, people wanting to write with me.”

In the years that followed, Vallance wrote dozens of notable songs for artists such as Bonnie Raitt, Aerosmith, Carly Simon, Rod Stewart, Roger Daltrey, Tina Turner, Alice Cooper, Ozzy Osbourne, KISS, Scorpions, and Joe Cocker. One of the more well-known compositions of this period was “What About Love”, released by American rockers Heart in 1985. It was a single that helped to revive their career but ironically enough, it wasn’t even intended for them.

The song, says Vallance, was originally written for the Canadian rock group Toronto, but was scrapped from their album just before its release.

“Three years later the song came to the attention of Heart's producer, Ron Nevison. Ron loved the song, but there was one small problem: the band hated it. They refused to record it. Ron finally convinced them to give it try, and somehow, somewhere, during the rehearsing and recording the song slowly grew on them. It ended up being a big 'comeback' hit for Heart.”

It’s a perfect example of how unpredictable songwriting can be – something that Vallance and many other composers have come to know all too well.

“One thing I've learned over the years: you can't predict which songs will be hits and which will be misses,” he says. “It's out of your hands. People either like your song, or they don't. You can wish

× Shannon Elliot

× Arts + Culture Editor

and hope and pray, but you can't make it happen.”

With multiple hits (and royalty cheques) to his name, it’s safe to say that Vallance has written more than a few well-liked songs over the years.

And while Adams may enjoy much of the credit as the visible presence on stage, his co-writer is happy to remain incognito and enjoy their legacy amongst the crowd. “I've been at Bryan's concerts all over the world, standing in the audience, watching 15,000 people sing along with ‘Summer Of '69’. They know every word,” he says. “It's a strange feeling. A good, strange feeling.”

getting into a bedfull of foreigners EXIT 22 BEGINS NEW THEATRE SEASON WITH A PROVOCATIVE COMEDY Glen Jackson × Writer

“Drowsy Chaperone is a tour de force for the musical theatre students who must always combine the best singing, acting and dancing together into a cohesive unit,” says Barber.

Exit 22 has worked hard to ensure there is something for everyone when it comes to their upcoming season. From farcical comedies to tense dramas, the theatre program is sure to take its audiences on an emotional roller coaster throughout the year. And who knows, this could be the last chance to see some of CapU’s aspiring stars before they make it big, like Elicia McKenzie did. “[She] won the ‘How do you Solve a Problem Like Maria’ show run by Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber, and… went on to star in Rock of Ages [in Toronto],” beams Barber. So whether it’s for a laugh, a cry, or an excuse to get out of the house, Exit 22 has it all in the upcoming 2013/2014 season.

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A Bedfull of Strangers runs from Oct. 16 to 19 at 8 p.m. in the university’s newly renamed BlueShore Financial Centre for the Performing Arts. A matinee performance will also take place on Oct. 19 at 2 p.m. For more information or to purchase tickets, interested readers may visit Capilanou.ca/blueshorefinancialcentre/

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edge of their seats.

In November, the mood will change drastically when Exit 22 takes on an adaptation of Pride and Prejudice, the timeless romantic drama from 1813 written by Jane Austen. The cast will be learning and displaying a “layer of manners from a society in an entirely different era from ours,” explains Gillian Barber, coordinator of the theatre department. CapU’s retelling of the story will coincide with novel’s 200th anniversary.

From there, tension will run high as the theatre program tackles Agatha Christie’s Witness for the Prosecution in February 2014. This play “will have different multimedia layers added to the mystery element,” says Barber, something that will be sure to spice up an already riveting plot line. The play is a perfect example of a classic adrenaline-pumping courtroom drama, challenging the audience to decide who is guilty before the verdict is revealed.

The final performance for the season, the Drowsy Chaperone by Bob Martin and Don McKellar, is a Canadian play within a play that will run in late March and early April. It is a parody of musical comedies during the 1920s, and follows an agoraphobic Broadway fanatic’s imagination as he listens to his favourite musical. As the music fills his ears, his apartment is transformed into an elaborate Broadway stage complete with ice-cool actors and elegant actresses of the 1920s jazz era.

the capilano courier

This October, Capilano University is making it easier and cheaper than ever for students to get into a bedfull of foreigners. That’s right, while the rest of the school has been settling into their classes for the semester; CapU’s theatre program has been working on casting and perfecting their first performance of the year. Exit 22 Productions will open their 2013/14 season next week with a British farce titled – wait for it – A Bedfull of Foreigners.

The play is based around a hotel room which has been precariously double booked during a local festival. A travelling, married couple finds themselves unexpectedly sharing accommodations with a businessman who is in town for a conference, and spending the night with his mistress. The festivities are cut short when the businessman’s wife comes for a visit. And, as if this doesn’t make the play interesting enough, adding a nun, a monk, and a completely incompetent hotel staff to the mix certainly sets the stage for an outrageous bedroom farce.

What better way to start off the year than with an edgy British comedy boasting to be “so funny, you’ll sheet the bed”?

Dr. Nicholas Harrison, director of A Bedfull of

Foreigners, says “the show is a farce, sexual in nature,” as suggested by the title. Though intended for a mature audience, children’s tickets are available for $10, while youth and student admission is priced at $15 and adults at $22. These tickets are available at the theatre box office or on the CapU website.

To say that this year’s crop of theatre students are hard at work to make the production a success would be an understatement. In preparation, the group has been rehearsing six evenings a week.

“The whole process is ongoing and [they] are in continual practice of polishing and building on the performances,” explains Harrison. Lines and blocking are only a part of the challenge for this production, which require a little extra in the way of slapstick humour. “I think the cast has been great in embracing the spirit and silliness of the play,” he adds. “It's high paced physical comedy.”

Dave Freeman, the author of A Bedfull of Foreigners, has been persistent in making a name for himself in the entertainment industry. Among his other works, Freeman has written episodes of the ’70s TV series the Avengers and been a primary writer for the once-popular British comedy program the Benny Hill TV Show. While the promise of an evening filled with laughter and good times is sure to draw in the masses, hilarious puns and clever innuendos will certainly keep them at the

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arts + Culture

A + C EDITOR ×

ANDY RICE

ARTS@CAPILANOCOURIER.COM

Capilano critters BEARS, RACCOONS, + SQUIRRELS ARE ALL NUTS ABOUT LIFE ON CAMPUS Jesse Downie

the capilano courier

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With all the luscious greenery to be found on Capilano University’s grounds, it should come as no surprise as to why our cushy North Shore digs are such sought-after real estate for woodland critters.

Along with a collection of eager first-years, the fall season has brought with it another skittish resident to campus: the bushy-tailed black squirrel. And while their activities are mostly limited to the great outdoors, every now and then one does get a little curious.

Recalling an incident involving a particularly daring squirrel and its attempted break-in to the Fir Building last year, music stores operator John McMurray can’t help but chuckle. “It was running through the halls, students were filming it,” he says. “I kind of liked the guy… never did find out what happened to him.”

Susan Doig, CapU’s director of facilities, maintains that a wide variety of forest dwellers choose CapU’s campus as their home. "We have raccoons, bald eagles, squirrels; of course, we’ve had bears, owls – beautiful owls a couple of years ago." With such a prominent presence on campus, peaceful coexistence with our woodland neighbors is priority one. Doig stresses the importance of proper disposal of waste as the campus has “frequent sightings of bears” and that, without proper diligence,

problems with them could arise. “We [the campus] are in the perfect location for them … it’s not that far from their home," she says, adding that the university does not currently have any big issues with animals or pests.

Utilizing frontlines, the university’s internal communications system, Doig remains confident that should any problems involving the campus’ wildlife arise, proper authorities would be notified and awareness would be raised accordingly.

Meanwhile, Simon Fraser University’s Burnaby campus has taken precautionary measures against wildlife intrusions one step further. In the wake of an incident last Halloween involving a bear being lured onto a campus by a rotten pumpkin, the university now boasts several newly installed bearproof waste receptacles. Along with the outfitting, awareness around campus is actively being raised regarding proper waste disposal so as to ensure the safety of the students and faculty on site. The new receptacles are also expected to be helpful in thwarting SFU’s hungry raccoon population.

Though not currently dealing with the infamous Ursus Americanus or an army of masked, furry garbage bandits, the University of Victoria is no stranger to the presence of wildlife on its grounds.

The UVic campus was, at one time, home to

an estimated 1,500 rabbits during the height of their population. Having been introduced to the grounds by disillusioned owners, the well-being of the rabbits quickly became a source of controversy for the university. The animals allegedly dug holes throughout the athletic fields which resulted in several serious injuries among athletes. In addition to the holes they dug, the rabbits consistently made a mess of the grounds with their droppings, and would frequently run out into traffic – causing another sort of mess altogether.

By 2010, the population had reached an extreme and a call to action was raised. With controlling the population no longer an option, the immediate response was for a campus-wide cull of the rabbits, but an outcry for humane treatment towards the animals quickly put a halt to that. Through careful deliberation, UVic administration decided instead to transport as many rabbits as it could to refuge sanctuaries. By the summer of 2011, with the help of local sanctuaries, volunteers, and no small effort from the university, the UVic campus was completely rabbit free.

Back on the mainland at Capilano University, Doig and her staff have yet to declare any animal a pest. In fact, domesticated animals are even encouraged on campus, albeit once a year.

“What we do have that’s different is we have a ‘bring your pet to work’ day,” she says. “We [the employees] do that every May. That’s one of the president’s pet projects. She has a beautiful poodle and so we actually do an annual bring your pet to work day.” Given that no rabbits managed to escape their cages and multiply during the 2013 installment of the tradition, odds are looking probable for this year.

For now, animal and wildlife situations on campus are being monitored as needed, but for the most part are simply being enjoyed. “I have some video on my phone of raccoons the other day,” Doig remembers. “That was pretty cool. They were just hanging out, see?”

She laughs as she contemplates whether or not the institution should look toward naming a particular animal as its unofficial mascot. "We haven’t adopted one as kind of the CapU pet yet," she says.

“Maybe we should.”

grateful for graffiti LOCAL BUSINESSES PUT A SPIN ON VANDALISM TO PROMOTE GRATITUDE Kristi Alexandra × Copy Editor

It’s no coincidence that the Gratitude Graffiti Project happens to match up with the 40 days leading up to Canadian Thanksgiving, the holiday famous for getting families to practice gratitude for each other – if only once a year.

When Lucila McElroy and Candace Davenport, the project’s initiators, met in New Jersey last year, they shared one similar goal: to be happy.

McElroy is a well-known wellness practitioner and life coach, while Davenport works as a nurse and health educator. The two hit it off during a meeting and launched the Gratitude Graffiti Project two weeks later.

The project mixes the idea of graffiti – often linked with vandalism, crime, and the defiling of public property – and the daily practice of gratitude – feeling grateful for what you have, and expressing thanks for it.

What McElroy and Davenport proposed to local businesses in their town of Maplewood, New Jersey last year was having what they called “gratitude stops”: places where people could stop, in the middle of whatever business they were doing (shopping, visiting with friends, heading to a meeting), and take a moment to be grateful for whatever they had to be grateful for that day.

Some stores offered up their front windows to the project, allowing people to take a washable pen and write on the storefront windows. Others had

pens, notepaper and boxes in which people could write down their thanks and put it in the box.

Others yet had ribbons that people could write on and hang along storefront marquees and cash registers. Though their methods and materials differed from store to store, participants were unified in a common mission -- writing or creating art in the name of gratefulness One year later, and the pair have taken the initiative to Vancouver.

On Sept. 5, residents, schools, and business owners in the Dunbar area of Vancouver took up a 40-day challenge to participate in the Gratitude Graffiti Project. Among the many participating outlets, or as McElroy would like to say, “gratitude stops”, is O Music Studios. The studio, which is a musical haven for youngsters, is an underground lair of several rehearsal, practice and audio rooms divided by glass windows and curtains—a perfect canvas for the project.

McElroy is walking among the studio — which her young daughters attend — as she shows off the outcome of her project, and the work of artistic and grateful kids. The students have successfully covered the surfaces of the glass with art, words and thanks, boasting messages like “I am greatful [sic] for my music teacher!” and “I love my dog.”

“I’m a life coach, I’m a pretty happy person, you know. I wear things like this,” she says as she peels

back a sweater to reveal a white cotton tee with the words “I Am Grateful” emblazoned across the chest. “As a life coach, I would even say to people: ‘go and start a gratitude practice, it’s amazing,’ but I had never really taken it on myself and what I realized, after even 20 days, I was like ‘yes, I feel really good.’ And I think the reason, what I really realized was that I had started a gratitude practice that was very focused, very specific.”

The other half of the project is the graffiti aspect, which co-founder Davenport chalks up to her urban upbringing.

“The graffiti aspect of it [the project] is coming from an urban environment. I grew up in New York City,” says Davenport during a Skype call from New Jersey. “Graffiti is what people say is loitering, what some people would say has a negative connotation but for people who grew up in an urban environment, graffiti can actually be really beautiful. I think that life is like that. You can interpret it as messy and yucky and bad, or you can interpret it as an expression of art and life. The practice is very life affirming and very positive ....

Aside from the fact that people are writing physically on storefront windows, which actually has that seedy feel to it – you know writing on a public space —a permissive public space, then we can say not only is this a public space but a shared space where people aren’t just coming to shop, they’re

coming to actually be, which flips the script. And that’s where the concept of gratitude and graffiti fits together.”

However positive Davenport’s partner might be, McElroy wasn’t without doubts that the idea of graffiti would discourage constructive rather than destructive participation.

“We have struggled with the word graffiti because it does have a negative connotation, and Candace and I have gone back and forth and had a lot of discussions around the word graffiti. One of the things that came out of the conversation that Candace really beautifully said to me: ‘The idea of this project is you, it’s about a perspective change.

Gratitude is about shining a light on something that you may have not seen before.’ Graffiti can have a negative connotation, what I loved about what Candace said was that was the whole point, we can actually create a whole different perspective for people to see it in a really positive light. It has that nuanced aspect,” says McElroy.

The Gratitude Graffiti project can be seen at various businesses and schools in the Dunbar area, and runs until Oct. 14, with hopes of an annual return.

For more information, interested readers may visit Thegratitudegraffitiproject.com.

F R I DAY O C TO B E R 2 5 , 2 01 3 7:00am – 5:30pm Presented by Eaton Educational Group At the Westin Bayshore Hotel, Vancouver, BC Educators, parents, psychologists, counsellors, speech language pathologists, occupational therapists, Faculty of Education students and anyone interested in the connections between the fields of education and neuroscience are welcome to register to hear this amazing line-up of speakers.

SPEAKERS:

Morning Keynote: Maximizing the Potential of the Brain

Exercise is Medicine for the Brain

Teaching Changes Brain Function: How Neuroscience Will Revolutionize Education

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BARBARA ARROWSMITH YOUNG (MA) The Intimate Connection Between Mental Health Issues and Learning Disabilities

DR. GABOR MATÉ

DR. RICK HANSON

Afternoon Keynote: From Emotion to Cognition: Love As The Ground For Learning

Hardwiring Happiness: Growing Inner Strengths in Children, Parents, and Teachers

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Improving Cognitive Functioning

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hip swings + wild Mrs.

NOT THE BUGG IN YOUR GARDEN

A BON JOVI CONCERT REVIEW

Faye Alexander

Mike Berard

× Opinions Editor

× Writer

After Jake Bugg’s stellar debut album released last fall, the self-titled Jake Bugg, it was a surprise to see the Nottingham-born and bred 19 year old sauntering back on stage so soon. It was only a few weeks ago that Bugg tweeted “Second album done!” – his upcoming November release, Shangri La. The sold-out crowd of PBR cracking young men and wanton moms erupted into yelps and squeals when the mop-topped U.K. chart topper approached the microphone, and opened with “Fire”, the perfect track for a croon-along chorus.

Bugg’s unique blend of retro-folk accompanied by his virtuoso status guitar riffs, were delivered with precision and passion. Bugg’s guitar plays like a second vocalist, building into full crescendo – the solos and riffs become like swear words accentuating a phrase. Still just a teen, Bugg proves he is wise beyond his years and his old soul shows through with the unadulterated delivery of his staggering vocals in beautiful brooding numbers like “Ballad of Mr. Jones” and crowd pleaser “Seen it All”.

The new material boasted an electrified feel and darker mood for young Bugg. The evolved sound came to fruition with the help of heavy weight pro-

It was 1986. I was a precocious 8 year old living in the out-of-the-way town of Port Hardy, B.C. I witnessed a man wearing a Bon Jovi Slippery When Wet tour shirt at the theatre. I remember my state of awe. Knowing that the man I idolized with the feathered hair and his band of merry hair experiments could actually be seen live…well, it became a dream to see them one day.

Last Wednesday, I got to finally make that dream a reality. And fuck, was it a nightmare of a rollercoaster. Lured to Rogers Arena with a gifted ticket and the promise of sing along choruses from my childhood, I entered the arena surrounded by a sea of dolled-up former beauties – myself included. The show started strong with classic ‘80s Jovi classics “You Give Love A Bad Name”, “Raise Your Hands” and “Runaway” igniting the crowd.

The latter especially firing up the Mom Army that made up most of the audience. I sang like a motherfucker. Then it got sad.

Admittedly, ‘90s-era Jovi is garbage, but Jovi in the ‘00s is torturous. Popularly referred to as “countrified”, most of this material is as far from Willie Nelson as it is from New Jersey’s revered rock and roll heritage. I sat for the following hour in silence, mostly because I never knew the words to any songs but also because I was bored by the incessant vanilla dog shit falling out of Jovi’s mouth. That stuff is truly horrible, proven by the fact that the modern Jovi anthem “It’s my Life” was the highlight. That’s how severe it was.

Hip-wiggling, over-the-head-hand-clapping, posing-for-the-Jumbotronning Jovi knows how to light up a crowd. “This ain’t television,” he ex-

ducer Rick Rubin, and long time song-writing cohort Iain Archer. His strange blend of Americana with influences like Bob Dylan and Neil Young shone through. His up-tempo twangy stompalong feel goodies like “Trouble Town” caused a stir up and down the aisles of the Vogue. Dance frenzies exploded when Bugg closed his 14-track set with “Two Fingers” and “Slumville Sunrise”.

He would later to return with an encore performance of “Lightning Bolt” – the song everyone was waiting for.

“You are perfect!” screamed one girl from the crowd, and in fact, he was.

THE SHERPAS VIDEO PREMIER Leah Scheitel

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into the mind

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KRISTI ALEXANDRA

The Rocky Mountain Sherpas have made quite the name for themselves in the ski and snowboard industry — an industry usually dominated by whosever mom has the nicest video camera that a young shredder can use to film his friends. The filmmakers have taken ski movies to an entirely new level – one that has never been explored before. And sometimes, even explorers can take a wrong turn.

Into The Mind is the much-anticipated new movie after the 2011 release of All.I.Can, and premiered at a sold-out show at the Whistler Convention Centre, in front of 1500 people. The Sherpas are known for being artsy and skillful filmmakers, and they didn’t disappoint on that aspect. There were shots of flowers blooming, and then dying under

the pressure of snowflakes, and still shots of a single snowflake falling from the sky. It was almost like a ski movie combined with a nature documentary. The problem with this is that it completely took away from the actual focus: the skiing.

Just when you thought you were about to see Callum Pettit dominate a gnarly line down a spine in Alaska, they would cut to a shot of a hospital bed, and then the inside of an elevator shaft, and to the snow-covered flower before they would cut back to the actual skiing. The artistry was brilliant, but so confusing that, at times, you weren’t quite sure what you were supposed to be looking at. The low point was the scene in the half-pipe, where there were multiple yet identical snowboarders doing various tricks around another identical snowboarder. It didn’t allow any time for the audience to marvel at the athleticism or quality of the skiing.

Also, the show started on a bad foot when Eric Crossland, one of the main filmmakers, wanted to thank all of the girlfriends and wives for staying at home during the cold winter months while they were pursuing their creative impulses.

Low blow, dude. Low blow.

claimed, imploring us to get out of our seats. And dammit, did we ever. He’d shake his denim buttocks to the delight of every woman in the room. It was invigorating. He may have even won me over at some point, but then he sandwiched the insipid “Have A Nice Day” in between “Wanted Dead Or Alive” and “Livin’ on a Prayer” during the encore, a sin I will never forgive him for.

In the end, I heard seven songs I liked – out of 23 – and I screamed like a mom for every one of them. Everyone else lost their shit for every hip shake, jumping jack, sultry camera pose and 51 year old air humping that Jovi graciously gifted to the audience with the energy of 37 year old.

Perhaps the most tell tale sign of Jovi’s allure was caught in a text message I read over the shoulder of a cute 20-something girl in the row ahead. Before the first note was played, she texted: “I’m at Bon Jovi concert!!! He’s so gross. Why am I here?” At the end of the concert, she was foaming at the mouth.

You’re good Jon Bon. Fuck, are you good.

olafur arnalds VIOLINS Faye Alexander × Opinions Editor Ólafur Arnalds is used to playing opera houses and large scale theatres across the pond, so playing Vancouver’s Fortune Sound Club may not have been the most familiar territory. The venue, most notoriously known for its hip-hop and urban scene, quickly transformed. “Can we make this a concert hall tonight?” Arnalds asked the crowd, who obliged his request happily. In the matter of a moment, everyone about the room was sitting cross legged on the floor of the club, beers in hand.

The entire show, consisting of Arnald’s wordless neo-classical creations, was captivating. Accompanied by Viktor Orri Arnason on violin, and Paul Grennan on cello, the small Fortune stage was crowded with classical instruments, the looming grand piano pushing the strings to the cozy remains of the stage.

Arnalds seamlessly drifted into material from his most recent album, last year’s For Now I am Winter. Mixing loops and beats from his iPad to compliment the tragic tinkling of piano keys and string arrangements. The abundance of melancholy his compositions possessed were countered

by Arnalds' incredible charm and humor, showcased between songs. “Not all sad songs necessarily have to come from heartbreak,” Arnalds told the crowd, his heart wrenching “Poland” was literally just about the unpaved highways of Poland, where it was impossible to sleep on a tour bus. Misery can stem from just about anywhere – no heartbreak required.

Violinist, Arnason, delivered an astounding solo that livened the hushed crowd into full celebration. Arnalds himself couldn’t contain his applause either. It was incredible to see such gifted musicians in such an intimate environment. A total treat to play witness to instrumentalists so at the forefront of their fields for a mere $15 – with that price tag, it was hard to feel like you weren’t getting away with something.

filler

FILLER EDITOR × ALL OF US EATING PIZZA

can haz all the cuddles?

MY CATS ARE CUTER THAN YOUR SQUEEZE

ADLER. Doctoral and Master’s Degrees in Psychology + Counselling Please meet us October 10 from 11:30-2:30 at the Capilano School of Business Career Fair.

FOR COMMUNITY HEALTH. The Adler School is founded on an important idea: Our health resides in our community life and connections.

This is what drives our ground-breaking curricula and commitment to community health.

We work with those who are courageous enough to want to change the world. Our Doctorate in Clinical Psychology (Psy.D.) and master’s degrees in Counselling Psychology, Art Therapy, Community Psychology, and Organizational Psychology prepare students with the theory and practice to become agents of health and social change.

The Adler School — Leading Social Change. Apply today.

adler.edu

Adler School of Professional Psychology Suite 1200, 1090 West Georgia St., Vancouver, BC V6E 3V7

F R I DAY O C TO B E R 2 5 , 2 01 3 7:00am – 5:30pm Presented by Eaton Educational Group At the Westin Bayshore Hotel, Vancouver, BC Educators, parents, psychologists, counsellors, speech language pathologists, occupational therapists, Faculty of Education students and anyone interested in the connections between the fields of education and neuroscience are welcome to register to hear this amazing line-up of speakers.

Register at: www.neuroplasticityandeducation.com

Morning Keynote: Maximizing the Potential of the Brain

Exercise is Medicine for the Brain

Teaching Changes Brain Function: How Neuroscience Will Revolutionize Education

N

EDUCA

T

IO

BARBARA ARROWSMITH YOUNG (MA) The Intimate Connection Between Mental Health Issues and Learning Disabilities

DR. GABOR MATÉ

DR. RICK HANSON

Afternoon Keynote: From Emotion to Cognition: Love As The Ground For Learning

Hardwiring Happiness: Growing Inner Strengths in Children, Parents, and Teachers

G

D

NAL

EATO

Bonus Session: Brain Basics

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HOSTS:

DR. J. BRAD HALE

47 issue N o . 05

DR. JOHN RATEY

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SPEAKERS:

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OPINIONS

OPINIONS EDITOR ×

FAYE ALEXANDER

OPINIONS@CAPILANOCOURIER.COM

what's in a word?

VITAMIN WATER ACCIDENTALLY CALLS YOU RETARDED James Martin Many people enjoy reading the inspirational quotes, fun facts, and fortune cookie-style messages that can often be found printed on the underside of bottle caps from various beverages.

Edmonton-based photographer Blake Loates, however, was less than amused when she and her husband flipped over the cap from a bottle of Vitamin Water to find the phrase "you retard" printed in capital letters. Understandably, she was rather shocked to find such a demeaning phrase hiding in a beverage container. She shared a photo of the offending bottle cap with her father Doug Loates, who was especially aggravated by the message. One of Loates’ other daughters is developmentally challenged and lives with cerebral palsy and autism.

"The R Word" as he calls it, is considered an especially egregious slur in the family.

How on earth did a major corporation like CocaCola ( parent company of Vitamin Water) allow such an insulting and politically incorrect term to be printed on one of their products? Was this the work of a prankster, a severe lack of judgement, or perhaps a disgruntled employee at a bottling plant? Loates wanted answers, and he fired off a letter to Coca-Cola's board of directors demanding an explanation. In his letter he talked about his daughter and how "destructive" and "uninformed" the use of the word "retard" is, signing off as "an ex-Coke drinker." At the time, it must

have seemed impossible to Loates that Coke would be able to offer up any sort of satisfactory excuse, but as it turns out the company and the employees responsible are actually free of any wrongdoing or malicious intent.

Coca-Cola's response to Loates' letter came swiftly, and in a bizarre twist it turned out that the company had intentionally printed the word on the cap, but without any shred of intent to convey the derogatory meaning of the word that the Loates family had read into it. It turns out that the Vitamin Water had been running a sort of wordscramble game where players could collect a single random word written on the undersides of bottle each bottle cap and arrange several of them to form sentences. Because the game was running Canadawide, the caps also included a French word below the English one. By an incredible fluke, the cap that Blake Loates found just happened to have the English word "you" printed above the common (and perfectly innocent) French word for "late" or "delayed": "retard".

Despite the fact that the offending message was the result of an entirely unforeseeable bilingual coincidence, Coca-Cola immediately apologized and owned up by scrapping the word game (it didn't sound like much fun anyway). Vitamin Water has stopped printing pairs of random French and English words on their bottle caps, and they made

$100,000 of donations to diversity and inclusion programs across the country.

Loates did the right thing by holding the company to account for what could be perceived to be a seriously offensive faux pas, and the company did the right thing by apologizing for the accident and taking corrective measures. That should have been the end of the matter.

However, although the Loates family seems pleased with Coca-Cola's response and has been circulating the company's apology letter on the internet, they have continued to criticize Coke in recent media interviews for allowing the word to be used in the first place. Blake Loates explains that "Coke told us they reviewed the words before the contest, so we're still a bit confused about why, after sitting down and looking at the word list, they would decide to keep it. Its English meaning is offensive and they should have realized that."

This assessment comes off as a bit presumptive.

Somebody whose job it is to review the words for the French half of the game would most likely have been a French-speaker reviewing them in that context: the French one. Loates apparently didn't feel this made for an adequate excuse for the word's use, telling Seattle's Kiro 7 News "not everyone in Canada speaks French. I don't speak French." The problem with this argument is that not everyone in Canada speaks English either, possibly including

× Jessica Ngo

× Writer

those in charge of approving the French word list.

Loates has made it clear in the same interview that "the battle is against the word, not against Coke." Raising awareness to discourage the use of the English slang term "retard" is a noble cause, but it comes off as a little ridiculous to continue directing blame at Coca-Cola for using the French version of it. Despite having the same letters in the same order, the use of "retard" to describe a lack of punctuality in French-speaking Canada is not the same thing as using it to insult somebody's mental facilities in English. It's simply not the same word.

His initial response to the bottle cap was absolutely justified due to the lack of context, but pushing the issue further after learning what had actually happened feels a bit like tilting at windmills. Francophones should be able to be late in their own language without insulting any English speakers (other than those waiting for them to arrive).

ted's dead GMO COMPANY MODIFIES TED'S PRINCIPLES Paisley Conrad We've all watched a TED Talk, an acronym for Technology, Entertainment and Design – known for its slogan “Ideas Worth Spreading.” TED is a non-profit organization whose televised conferences have done an awful lot of talking about an awful lot of things. From speeches about success, to the science of space, every subject has been covered. Local conferences are branded as TEDx and encourage grassroots campaigns that relate to the individual communities they are held in. TED's goal has always seemed to encourage independent researchers who challenge mainstream belief and

20

× Ksenia Kozhevnikova

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47 issue N o . 05

× Writer think outside the box. Unfortunately, for those innovative individuals with radical ideas, TED is no longer a viable medium for their ground-breaking research.

In the last year, TED has begun to censor their speakers fairly rigorously. Topics that are considered taboo are intertwined with issues encompassing genetically modified organisms (GMOs), and the idea that food can be used as medicine.

Though TED has posted talks given by religious leaders about the power of their faith, and their doctrine, faith in relation to healing and science has been dubbed as “bad science” and is on the list of vetoed topics. Also considered pseudo-science, alternative methods of medicine, naturopathy and Reiki have been cut from the allowed list of topics. Anti-vaccine talks are now strictly banned, in addition to neuroscience. TED's present stance on medicine is that if it isn't a pharmaceutical, it isn't legitimate – ignoring the proof that natural herbs and plants are extremely beneficial for the human body’s immune system. The placebo effect is also considered to be bad science, despite the proven effectiveness of placebo drugs. In addition to censoring their topics, TED is now turning away speakers who don't have the highest possible education in their subject, or have a well-respected career.

This contrasts sharply with their former encouragement of grassroots campaigns.

In the age of information, this restriction of development is terrifying – it raises the question: “who is behind this?” No official announcements have been made, but rumours are floating around that TED has aligned with Monsanto and pharmaceutical companies. Given recent actions, an underthe-radar partnership seems likely. It wouldn't be the first time that innovation has been strangled in an attempt to stay in power for a massive corporation.

In the 15th century, Nicolaus Copernicus challenged the ideals of mainstream science, and his discovery of heliocentricism still rings true six centuries later. A century later, Galileo debunked even more common misconceptions about the solar system, and changed mainstream science even further.

Around the same time period, Leonardo da Vinci was making medical history with his dissections of the human body and designs for technology which were far ahead of his time. All of these men were considered radicals in their day, yet their theories have been proven time and time again and are still accepted today as the norm. Without them, the Earth would still be flat, the moon would still be smooth, and scuba gear wouldn't exist.

Not only are potential topics being turned away, but offensive talks are being removed from the TED archives and YouTube channels. Opening with the statement ,“the science delusion is the

belief that science already understands the nature of reality in principle, leaving only the details to be filled in,” Rupert Sheldrake's talk “The Science Delusion” didn't remain posted for long. The content consisted of the denouncement of scientific materialism, the debunking of multiple presentday dogmas, and a reminder that science must be pursued with an open mind. Around the same time, “The War on Consciousness” by Graham Hancock was also taken down, due to its presentation of a natural herb which has been proven to help overcome addiction, and a frank discussion of the nature of psychedelics. TED has deemed them “bad science”, while these scientists have the support of the mainstream scientific community.

Nothing about these two videos contain false or inappropriate information, they simply defy the constrictions of the norm.

TED isn't a scientific journal. It isn't the definitive encyclopedia of all knowledge. It is a unique forum for discovery and a medium for sharing and expressing ideas in an organized way, to a large, interested group of people. This censorship is going against everything that the organization once stood for. The golden age of TED has passed, and it appears as though the public will have to wait until a new vehicle for the expression of innovation s developed to learn anything fresh.

Privacy issues

APPS + CAMERAS THREATEN SECRECY Josh Martin × Writer moting a negative value in society?

Relationships are completely built around trust, using this app to breach privacy with whoever it may be, is breaking that bond right off the bat. If there’s no trust, there’s no relationship. However, with something so readily available with the click of a button, nothing is stopping anyone from finding out what they should or shouldn’t know. The temptations may be too great for some – in Brazil that “some” is rather a large number of people. Although this app may not be necessarily morally “right”, it offers the truth and sometimes the truth can save a relationship many years of wasted time on a partner who isn’t being faithful. As for the creeps, pedophiles, and stalkers out there who use the app to remain completely hidden under a cloak of invisibility, the job has become a whole lot easier.

A sense of pride comes to mind when hearing that this sort of behaviour isn’t going on in Canada. Of course, there are the iPhone apps where there’s a tracking device that lets you know exactly where your loved ones are but who would have ever imagined their being a way of accessing personal information on another’s phone with a click of a button. This patriotic feeling that Canada as a country would never sink that low was very short lived. In recent news, an upscale Vancouver restaurant, Two Chefs and a Table, pushed the privacy issue to a whole new level of filth. The Downtown Eastside restaurant was shut down after a co-owner

found a camera the size of a small USB inside the toilet of the restaurant’s bathroom while cleaning.

It’s obviously implied that this camera was used to record videos of people going about their business, as the washroom was used by both females and males, and served as a change room for staff members. The real kicker is that the camera that was used can be bought online for under $20. For just $20, a camera can be small enough to record videos without anyone noticing. Imagine what expensive cameras are capable of? How small they can get?

The most concerning question would be if there would be any patterns going on in the other two restaurants that the company owns: Big Lou’s Butcher Shop and Two Chefs located × Camille Segurin Richmond. What if cameras were hidden all over these places? Who would know about them? It also forces you to think about your own work place or school classroom where you would never think of such things. If there is one sicko out there with a hidden camera you can sure - as - hell bet there are more.

With the violations of privacy between the “Boyfriend Tracker” and the hidden camera incident, fear is being instilled into our public domain.

However, there’s nothing we, as a society, can really do but hope that a situation of privacy invasion never arises in our personal lives. The truth is, unfortunately, that it probably will sometime in our lifetime especially in our high technological era.

Putting trust into another human being is looked

at as a positive value, but with all of this new technology constantly being upgraded you can never be too sure if your next door neighbour is really a sweet, old lady or an evil, conniving stalker who has a secret shrine of you in her upstairs attic.

And who said Vancouver was an unfriendly city?

× Emily McGratten

A recent Google Play app, the “Boyfriend Tracker” has made its way into the smart phones of thousands of Brazilians in the past couple of weeks.

The latest Google creation allows partners to spy on their “loved ones” to make sure they’re not doing anything out of the ordinary — like having sex with another man or woman. The app will send tracking updates and forward duplicates of text messages from your partner’s phone so you know at all times who they’re talking to and why, without them even knowing. But wait — this app gets even better. A special command feature lets you force a silent phone call on your partner — like a pocket dial — you can now hear what your partner is saying whenever you want. The only way one can install “Boyfriend Tracker” is to get their grimy hands on their other half ’s Smartphone and install the app. Or pay an additional $2 per month to keep the app on their phone invisible, so they’ll never even know what hit them.

For arguments sake, there are two ways of looking at this: one – it’s revolting and is pushing the boundaries on privacy rights, or: two – it’s the truth and at the end of the day that’s all that matters. Taking a look at the latter, the app has attracted more than 50,000 people in just over two months since it was launched. This sense of fear, paranoia, curiosity, or whatever you want to call it seems to be a fairly mutual feeling among Smartphone users in Brazil, which means this Google Play app can be deemed a success. But is it pro-

play music! Quebecois Criminals POLARIS PRIZE WIN POLARIZES CRITICS Kelly Mackay

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for something. Whether or not you agree with their actions, it matters little, just like if they live up to their intent completely.” On talking about the album, he said “it feels more like a statement on how music can be created and appreciated. A recording from a band on their own terms and timeline, from a band that didn’t need to ever enter a studio again. It’s a call to action, but not in terms of polling stations and policy reform. It’s about conviction and staying true to an artistic vision.”

GYBE is standing up in a time when musicians are comfortable blending and following suit. They are trying to reshape the way in which music is celebrated nowadays - not necessarily rejecting it.

The band’s show in Vancouver last month confirmed that they have a distinctly unique sound, and produce an atmosphere that is unquestionably hard to top. A band that stands on its own and strongly voices what it believes is difficult to find amongst the flocks of sheep within the music industry today. Let them speak what they think, and play what they write. Godspeed You! Black Emperor deserves all the credit the band gets for their most recent glorious album.

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musical publicity stunts, has landed them under fire considering this is a particularly loud way to voice an opinion. However, GYBE has always had a different way of dealing with things.

The fact that they’re “going to use the money to try to set up a program so that prisoners in Quebec have musical instruments if they need them,” isn’t throwing the award back at the organization – it’s merely being directed towards helping a cause they care about. Other celebrities claim to be funding charities, or going to a third world countries to take a selfie holding a kids hand. GYBE, on the other hand, is genuinely helping a cause that is largely overlooked and undervalued.

Regardless of where they spend their winnings, the point remains the same: music should be celebrated indefinitely, it should not be seen as a competition. Everyone who plays deserves acknowledgement. Another excerpt from their statement: “much respect for all y’all who write about local bands, who blow that horn loudly- because that trumpeting is crucial and necessary and important.” Their statement isn’t declaring rejection of the award. They even say they are “humbled” by their win. They are making a concerted effort to draw attention to the necessity of acknowledging those bands who are less known, and yet equally worthy of celebration.

Bryan Acker from Herohill.com wrote: “are they perfect? Of course not, but they are trying to stand

×

Known for their controversial mentality in the music industry, Godspeed You! Black Emperor responded to their 2013 Polaris Prize win with an interesting note that opened up a different response to our music industry.

Constellation Records co-founder Ian Ilavsky read out a written statement by the band, including “asking the Toyota Motor Company to help cover the tab for that gala, during a summer where the melting northern ice caps are live-streaming on the internet, is fucking insane, and comes across as tone-deaf to the current horrifying malaise.”

Their point read loud and clear. The purpose of an awards show is to compare and celebrate a band for supposedly being better than other bands. The fact

the Polaris Prize is entirely monetary makes the concept of such events exceptionally disturbing.

The whole point of music is to entertain, but why does there need to be the added pressure of competing? There is no crime in wanting to become well known. Music should be shared and those responsible for the creation of it should be celebrated. But to be compared to others based on the opinions of one group of people seems inappropriate, and against the general ethic of what music is about: sharing.

The point that GYBE is making is that the prospect of competing for money isn’t what music is about. In their statement, they said “if the point of this prize and party is acknowledging music-labour performed in the name of something other than quick money, well, then, maybe the next celebration should happen in a cruddier hall, without the corporate banners and culture overlords.” It is important to acknowledge the hard work and musical talent that we are surrounded by, but there must be an alternative way of doing so without relying on huge corporations relentlessly fuelling the awards with easy money.

Francois Marchand of the Vancouver Sun, said: “the ultimate irony is that all this faux controversy has managed to generate an inordinate amount of visibility for a band that always — allegedly — desired none.” Clearly, the fact that they have always claimed to be distant from all the typical

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× Sydney Parent

× Writer

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CABOOSE EDITOR ×

JEREMY HANLON

CABOOSE.CAPCOURIER@GMAIL.COM

small town news Scott Moraes

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47 issue N o . 05

× Danielle Mainman

× Managing Editor

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DECEASED FRENCH NOVELIST HONOURED IN PRAIRIE TOWN

FLATULENCE IN CHURCH COULD LEAD TO DEATH SENTENCE

THE SINGING SALMON

BENCHES AND TREES

The town of Balzac, Alberta has received an illustrious visit from famed French novelist Honoré de Balzac's own great-great-grandniece. Miss de Balzac was on a visit after she had read about the town on the internet. She promises to endow the town's library with a complete collection of her great-great-granduncle's oeuvre, La Comédie Humaine, as soon as the city builds a library to store it. The town's mayor will house the 24-volume collection until provincial funding allows for the construction of the library. He states that, in the meantime, he wishes the cultural value of the collection to be shared by the community, and will “make borrowing of the volumes possible to all city residents for a fee of $5 a day”.

A heated controversy is unraveling in Saskatchewan after an indisposed patron released repeated flatulence in church during a Sunday service. The patron, a lentil farmer, has claimed that the incident was caused by excessive ingestion of lentils due to shrinking demand for his product (the very subject of his prayers that day). The priest has since started an online petition for the public execution of the man, who has secluded himself in the town's whorehouse, outside the church's jurisdiction. He wishes to make clear that the establishment has only served as a shelter and has not led to sin. This in turn has elicited outcries from groups claiming that whorehouses have long been illegal in Canada.

The petition has so far accumulated 35 signatures, including God's own. A counter-petition for the price controls of Prairie lentils, on the other hand, has only accumulated 30 signatures, 29 of which are by the same person, and one which appears to be a forged signature of God.

Members of a small community in Northern British Columbia have started a campaign against a man whom they claim is using Voodooism and black magic to torture animals. The debacle originated when a video surfaced online, made by a Mr. Patrick Brown. The video clearly displays a salmon nailed to the wall, who is hypnotized and brought back to life by methods unknown, and then made to sing a song by Bryan Adams, only to die again, crucified on the wall. Such procedure can be repeated indefinitely by Mr. Brown's black magic.

Animal rights groups are accusing Mr. Brown of animal torture and have described the video as “a horrific exercise in disrespect of nature and an affront to a talented Canadian icon.” Mr Brown has released a statement saying that the fish is a rubber toy powered by batteries, and that no real animals were harmed during the making of the video. Further investigations will be conducted to assess the validity of Mr. Brown's dubious testimony.

Community members in Blair, Manitoba are fighting for the right to have their loved ones' names engraved in park benches. Benches in city parks have long been engraved with names of the longlong-deceased. The last honoured citizen passed away in November 1963, having had a stroke following news of U.S. President John Kennedy's assassination. Marlene Wiggins, a member of city council, suggests that new loved ones' nameplates should be nailed to trees rather than being sat on, which is “in itself an old-fashioned and disrespectful notion.” This idea would prevent elder citizens' unrest upon having their loved ones' names removed. Anna Lee Walker, a conservative 87-yearold radio host, expressed her views to her listeners: “Some of these people died protecting us from the Indians, from the Russians, from Aliens. It's true no one remembers them personally, but we should be grateful and leave their names alone, lest they come back to haunt us for it.” Walker also attacked Wiggins for suggesting a preposterous idea that would “clearly affect the livelihood of squirrels that wouldn't be able to climb trees.” A compromise is yet to be found, and in the meantime, loved ones' names are being listed and recorded in the city museum's visitors log book, which hasn't had a live entry since 1996.

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go.play.outside A COST FREE NOSTALGIA Cheryl Swan

× Cheryl Swan

× Art Director

"These were just faulty decisions we’d soon after laugh about, free of cost. Then we’d down a pint of Kool-Aid and carry on running, playing, and having fun."

47 issue N o . 05

× Cheryl Swan

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concoct “nature salads” out of grass, leaves, twigs, mud “meat”-balls, flowers, and the occasional damp tree bark “chicken” cutlets which you’d agree looks a lot like the real thing after a rainfall. I made a five-year-old girl eat the salad I once made – whoops. That’s something I’d apologize for now.

The day’s end would come, and we’d bike to the convenient store to buy 40 cent Mr. Freezies and afterwards compare the cuts it left on the sides of our sticky mouths.

This was pretty much my day in-day out schedule until I would hear my mom’s beckoning call far off in the distance around suppertime. I would pretend I didn’t hear it to extend my play outside.

Alas, I’d be eating my gone-cold or lukewarm food in a rush while my buddy awaited me at my doorstep. Peering through the lacy curtain motioning me to hurry, I’d wash it down with milk, grab cookies, and be back out the door quicker than I could say “I’m going back outside!”

There is nothing better than that last hour or two of outdoor play before bedtime as a kid. Breaking a sweat was the perfect wind down every time, whether it was in snow, the chill of fall or the humidity.

There was a definite benefit to growing up in the time that I did, the way that I did. It was paired nicely with circumstance and landing just below financially comfortable, so I had no reason to ignore my imagination and wanderlust. Dear moms and dads: we do not need fancy things. Well-off or not, tell your babies to go play outside. It’s way better than any game on an iPad, even if it were called “iNature”.

×

redraw the naked bits we’d chuckle over from the “Where did I come from?” book that my mom had awkwardly given me when I was nine. We did, however, run through sprinklers and go iceskating often.

Her brother was three years younger and the best outdoor partner in crime one could spend 12 hours a day, almost every day with – rain or shine, snow or ice storm. We embraced whatever season and weather Mother Nature could throw at us.

With our feral imaginations and frenzy for adventure, we’d embark on ventures beyond the trees (still within the vicinity, but close to a highway) that would have the adult’s bloomers in a knot.

But at that age you can do anything, you’re invincible and you’re a daredevil – at least we were. Not to mention our A+ coordination and agility were broken bone preventatives, with the exception of that one time we built an unsteady bike jump and decided to ride bicycles that were excessively large, and my crotch ate shit on the crossbar. And that other time we raced down the icy hill backwards on GTs and crashed into tree trunks, or the other time when I crawled too high up a tree and slid down the bark rather than climb back down branch by branch. These were just faulty decisions we’d soon after laugh about, free of cost. Then we’d down a pint of Kool-Aid and carry on running, playing, and having fun.

We would, on many occasions, gallivant around with whichever kids happened to be playing outside as well. Like a child gang – climbing the hills to the City Hall dump in search of treasures to build a dream tree house. We’d tiptoe through the rocky creek stream to find frogs, salamanders and grass hoppers. After finding the ingredients, we’d

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I was born in a year where my entertainment would potentially come with little cost. It was a time when my hands would soon learn to grasp onto crayons and jump-rope handles rather than Wii controllers and iPads, iPods or iPhones – whatever it is that kids these days convince their parents they just can’t live without. I remember begging for a Nintendo once upon a Christmas and getting it but only owning about five games in its lifetime. Games I would blow into to get working and if failed, back outside I went. I would say, from the age of four to 13, I would spend about 12 out of 24 hours a day outdoors in my “project”.

No, I didn’t grow up in a ghetto – I am just French.

My parents divorced when I was four, and my mom moved my sister and I to a cul-de-sac street with surrounding woods and grassy (or snowy) hills that seemed so very steep from my imaginative perspective – which in hindsight, I can say was (and should be) every kid’s dream neighbourhood.

There were about 30 units along this street and I would soon discover that other kids around my age made up 75 per cent of the neighborhood’s population, which only added to the dream neighbourhood. Some kids would come while others would leave and I’d befriend some replacements.

For the most part, though, I had made “bestest friends” with two kids in particular – who’ve ever since contributed to my bittersweet longing for the past, or at least fed me the most delicious memories. The two were siblings and lived directly across from me.

The sister was my age and more my indoor friend that I’d giggle with over hot chocolate topped with too many marshmallows, record our idiosyncratic antics on video and audio cassettes, and secretly

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JEREMY HANLON

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SHOTGUN REVIEWS

BEING NOCTURNAL

FILLING UP THE POT

CRIMINAL LAUGHTER

NAVI

James Martin // Writer

Rana Sowdaey // Writer

Kelly Mackay // Writer

Jeremy "Underhanded" Hanlon // Caboose Editor

Although it's not the easiest feat to accomplish, living life on Uzbekistan Standard Time whilst residing in Vancouver has some real benefits to which your other favourite lifestyle fads simply cannot compare. I guarantee your productivity will increase 150 per cent when there is absolutely nobody else awake to distract you (even on Facebook). You will eat shitty fast food far less often because there are so few options open in this town past 1:00 a.m. and you'll soon be entirely sick of all of them. If you drive, you'll never again waste so much as a second being stuck in traffic.

My personal favourite part is that you can have breakfast for dinner. Sure, living in perpetual darkness can get old, but you only need to remember that winter is just around the corner and soon it won't matter what time you're awake because those few mid-day hours when the sun does attempt to penetrate the suffocatingly bleak clouds will likely be wasted half-asleep inside a poorly-lit classroom. You may as well save your best hours for after midnight when you can roam the streets pretending to be Batman or the lone survivor in a post-apocalyptic wasteland.

The old Italian cafes in little Italies all over North America are still serving their coffees dark and petite. Everywhere else will serve a cup of coffee disproportionate in size. We like them big so that we feel their proper weight in our hands. We like them tall so that we can balance them on the dashboard, in between our knees, and on the park bench. I don't know how to explain this to my friends from abroad when they gape at the large cup I place in front of them. Here, we just don't have time to sit down for a second or third miniature coffee. The chances of stopping by the local cafe with classmates or to meet our profs at the town square are slim. They pick up the cup with both hands, they scrutinize, they raise eyebrows. What can I say? We regularly commute great distances and our coffee culture focuses on drinking on the way to work, to class, to the mall. “I'll take it to go,” we say. In Europe, I don't believe I ever saw a to-go cup except at Starbucks. For us, coffee is what gets us there. We have a long way to go so we need it big! I guess we can say, we need it to fill up the tank.

I made the executive decision to listen to a comedic audio book on the bus last week. Not only was I faced with immediate judgment after the first laugh, but I also felt as though I had fallen into the dreaded categorization of the bus demographic. As we are all aware, there are certain stereotypes that animate our already treacherous transit journeys. The garlic burrito carrier or perhaps Wendy’s indulger (depending entirely on the bus route, but that belongs in SOC 100). This person couldn’t give two shits about your appetite status, and shares it with you regardless. Then there's the obnoxious phone caller who believes that we genuinely want to hear about whether or not some dickhead texted her back. And finally, there are the blaring headphones, generally playing Avicii, or something you would expect to find on the iPod of the unfortunate.Now, to be categorized into these tragic states of being merely for sharing a slight eruption of laughter seems a little bit silly. Sure, there’s something uncomfortable about someone laughing to themselves in the back corner of the bus, but we all like a little entertainment every once in a while. Some of us, however, are a bit more selfish with it than others.

Anyone who's played The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time is familiar with this little winged fucker. As players would learn early on, every kokiri (read: weird-ass forest gnome) gets a fairy to watch over it. Navi is yours, and what a chore that is. During your adventure, you are never given respite from the constant exclamations of "hey!" and "listen!" providing the player with information that is never, ever, useful. I think the best part about the player getting this fairy is that their character isn't even one of the dudes who's supposed to get one. I'm pretty sure all the other fairies sent Navi with the player to join him on his quest just so they could get rid of her, making Link's journey endlessly more memorable and annoying.

OVER THE LINE W/ SCOTT MORAES JESSE PINKMAN SPIN-OFF SHOW PLEASE DON'T OKTOBERFEST WE'RE NOT COOL ENOUGH

DEXTER MOVES TO ARGENTINA SHOULD'VE GONE. THEY LIKE BUTCHERS DOWN THERE. OBAMACARE NO, HE DON'T VIRGIN DRINKS WHO SAID ALCOHOL DEFLOWERS DRINKS?

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47 issue N o . 05

BORDER PATROL LITERALLY BORDERLINE

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CANADA REVENUE AGENCY FUN PEOPLE WHO SEND SAD LETTERS EARLY FALL A BRIEF SLICE OF CLIMATIC HEAVEN WHITE SPOT A BIG WHITE SMILE ON CANADA'S REPUTATION ARAMARK CROISSANTS CAN WE JUST CALL THEM SOMETHING ELSE?

× Christina Kruger-Woodrow