Capilano Courier // Volume 48 // Issue 9

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VOL UME

48

ADVANCED POLLING

NORTH VANCOUVER, NOVEMBER 3RD 2014

TINDER TAXES

JIAN GHOMESSY

ISSUE

N O . 09

CHROMEO


CAPILANO Courier

VOLUME 48 I SSUE N O . 09

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News

A+C

Art shorts

FeAtures

opiNioNs

ColumNs

CAboose

Chat Live

Tattoo Rockstars

Bonafide Lovin'

Midterm Madness

Hitting the "Ji" Spot

Sarah Connor "Terminated"

Hot Beans

Leah Scheitel Editor-in-Chief

THE CAPILANO COURIER.

@capilanocourier

VOLUME 48 I SSUE N O . 09

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The Staff

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@capilanocourier

Therese Guieb News Editor

of this gas-huffing, ballot box-stuffing, cigarette-puffing university newspaper

Andy Rice Managing Editor

Alva Tee Arts + Culture Editor

Andrew Palmquist Production Manager

Faye Alexander Features Editor

Cheryl Swan Art Director

Gabriel Scorgie Opinions Editor

Carlo Javier Lifestyle Editor

Ricky Bao Business Manager

Darrell Kostinuk Web Editor

CONTRIBUTING WRITERS:

Kevin Kapenda, James Marin, Alicia Neptune, Heather Connor, Christine Beyleveldt, Razan Talebian, Simon Thistlewood, Keara Farnan, Aidan Moullic, Tristen Schmidhauser, Scott Barkemeyer, Matt Jolliffe, Tasha Salads, Jeremy Hanlon, Holly "It's My Birthday" Pavlik CONTRIBUTING ARTISTS:

Samantha Smith, Marla White, Vivian Liu, Ekaterina Aristova, J.R. Pinto, Jason Jeon, Crystal Lee, Ksenia Kozhevnikova, Olliemoonsta, Chris Dedinsky, Cristian Fowlie , Megan Collinson, Amy Mayer, Taylor Lee, Sydney Parent, Katie So

To advertise in the Courier’s pages, please contact our Advertising Director, Andy Rice, at 778-855-9942 or advertising.capcourier@gmail.com. We are proud to offer discounts to non-profit organizations and North Shore customers. A full media kit with sizes, rates and deadlines is available on our website, CapilanoCourier.com.

The Capilano Courier is an autonomous, democratically run student newspaper. Literary and visual submissions are welcomed. All submissions are subject to editing for brevity, taste, and legality. The Capilano Courier will not publish material deemed by the collective to exhibit sexism, racism or homophobia. The views expressed by the contributing writers are not necessarily those of the Capilano Courier Publishing Society.


Letter From The Editor Leah Scheitel, Editor-in-Chief

use that pretty little voice "I believe that voting is the first act of building a community as well as building a country"

- John Ensign

It only took four years, but on Tuesday evening, I voluntarily went to my first campus event. I stayed at the school to see an Earthworks talk about climate change and how it will affect the North Shore Mountains. Titled “Skis, Snowboards and Snowshoes”, the talk featured a panel of four experts, including representatives from both Whistler Blackcomb and Grouse Mountain, the Ministry of Environment and professional snowboarder, Leanne Pelosi. Capilano University doesn’t have a strong representation for student involvement. There are various clubs, committees and meetings calling for student participation that often go overlooked and leave the organizers with five boxes of pizza to either eat or throw out. As the Editor-in-Chief of this paper, I can say from experience that the lack of student involvement directly affects how the business can be run. Our newspaper bylaws state that we need at least 14 students at any of our Annual General Meetings or Special General Meetings to meet quorum. There has been more than one occasion where we’ve had to bribe film students to come for the free pizza just to start the meeting. While the epidemic of student apathy on campus is well known, there doesn’t seem to be a cure for it. It is often laughed about, as I have done in previous articles, saying that if we had a campus bar, maybe student involvement would increase. But that’s not even a sure thing if we got a campus bar. However, if we did get a campus watering hole, we would sure as shit lose money and some dignity in there. The reason it’s hard to engage students is because it’s hard to get people to care about anything that they don’t want to or don’t know about. At the end of the panel on Tuesday evening, the moderator kept repeating one point: use your voice. That’s what you, as an individual citizen, can do to promote anything. This is as simple as starting a conversation, wearing a pin or putting a bumper sticker on your Toyota Tercel. He was specifically talking about climate change and encouraging people to vote in the looming municipal elections, both of which are important. But as the boss of this beauty paper, I have a platform and a slightly louder voice, which I’m privileged to have. And because of that, I’m going to use it to solicit my case as to why you, as a student and community member, should get more involved on campus. Obviously the underlying

reason is for the free food – that one evening I went to an event, I stuffed my face with as much cheese as humanly possible. But there are other reasons. Practice is the most prominent reason. Most of the student governing bodies and boards use Robert’s Rules of Order, which is an age-old democratic system and is how many boards in the real world still operate. These rules can get complicated, and wouldn’t it be better that the first time you had to use them in real life, you knew what you were talking about? Even if you don’t use them, they are good to understand, as its how municipal governments are run. Also, if you do opt to get on a board of sorts, they look baller on a resume and give you a strong reference if you ever need it. Along with practice, attending events and getting involved are educational opportunities. These events are bursting with information about various initiatives and causes. You can also learn about potential job openings or different opportunities that you would have missed out on if you had gone home to binge watch Gilmore Girls on Netflix. Complimenting this are the networking opportunities. All of these events are opportunities to meet community leaders and different people who can help you later on in life. And who knows, maybe you’ll meet a future lover. I hear the accounting association is full of babes and they have two upcoming events. All good sales pitches end with a call to action, and here’s mine: do it. Get involved. Do something more with your time in university. My work with the Courier has been the best part of my experience at CapU, and has enabled me to enhance my portfolio and bolster my networking, interviewing and managerial skills. And, as proven by this self-indulgent editorial, it enhances your voice and gives you a platform to speak from. Don’t be shy – all of these events are open invitations to get involved and educate yourself on something that can enhance you life, career and potentially your romance situation. And if you’re not sure where to start, it’s simple: by reading this week’s cover feature, detailing the mayoral candidates for the City of North Vancouver and then casting your vote in the Nov. 15 municipal election. That, and then telling your friends to do the same. It’s the best use of your voice after belting out Mariah Carey ballads in the shower.

tweets oF the week

the VoiCe box

*

with

Andy Rice #GHOMESHI

The Voicebox is back, ready to humbly respond to your questions, concerns, and comments about anything. To inquire, just send a text to 778.855.9942 to anonymously "express" and "voice" your "opinion" and "thoughts" on any "subject" or "issue". And, as long as it's not offensive, we will publish it here, right in the Voicebox. It's a win - win, or whine - whine whatever way you look at it.

I saw Kris Bulcroft dressed as a vampire and walking around campus with her dog today. Which program do you think she’s going to suck the life out of next? Ouch! I’m not even going to touch this one.

By “your”, I think you mean our lovely Features Editor, Faye Alexander, who did a bang-up job on that article. Totally nailed it. (Are you noticing my half-assed attempt at porn puns here?!) I also find it kind of funny that you used god and porn in the same sentence. I’m sure some of our more devout Courier readers will appreciate that. Cool that you’re into scat though. And that you’re German. Points for bratwurst. Why do you guys keep calling your Editor-in-Chief “Schei”? She’s not shy at all. I was at a party last weekend and she hit on my brother. Because her last name is Scheitel and millennials love abbreviating things that don’t need abbreviating. Actually, I

There’s a ‘post it forward’ board in the cafeteria, people are posting such nice things. I didn’t know the school was so nice. nice /nīs/ adjective • pleasant; agreeable; satisfactory. Satisfactory. Now if that isn’t the perfect word to describe CapU then I don’t know what is. Where’s the board at, brah? I have some nice things to say…

varujean avanessian @pandaglu Jian in Farsi means rapacious. Ali A. Rizvi @aliamjadrizvi If guilty, #Ghomeshi did it bc he COULD. It's up to all of us (not just victims) to make reporting assault easier. Kamal Arora @kamarora as south asian women - often difficult to discuss abuse bc of fears of community ostracization. kudos @RevaSeth for doing so. #cbc #ghomeshi Dr. Were-dog @DrDawg So stop, already, w this "mob rule" crap. I can look at evidence as well as the next person. #Ghomeshi is a vile misogynist, and that's that. Alise Mills @graciestyle I'm joining @brianlilley today on #Byline to talk about #ghomeshi and why some feminists have publicly supported him. John Michael Bennett @JohnMichaelINL The more I think about it, the more I do question it. No one gives a crap if are Christian Grey in the bedroom. Maybe decades ago. #ghomeshi Kathleen Smith @KikkiPlanet Calm down everyone. Maybe the Leafs just called him up to drive the zamboni. #ghomeshi David Maher @DavidMaherNL The only way this Jian Ghomeshi situation could get worse is if Glenn Healey were to replace him. #ghomeshi #cbc

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I really liked your article on porn. As a certified porn fanatic I can confirm that softcore is by far the most disturbing form of it, but god knows scat does it for me. Call me german or call me crazy! Thanks, porn expert!

think our Production Manager was the first one to call her “Schei” — apparently he said it one time after he drunkenly crashed into her Christmas tree when they were hanging out. My theory is that he was probably saying “Shiiiii” as the torrential downpour of glass ornaments came raining down all around him and she just mistook it for her name. But at any rate, “Schei” became a thing. Also, fun fact: Scheitel means “hair part” in German. It’s also the Yiddish word for a wig-type hairpiece worn by married women of the Orthodox Jewish faith. I find that kind of funny because Leah isn’t married, hairy or Jewish, but at least you learned something new at school today. Is your brother married, hairy or Jewish? “Schei” wants to know.

Todd Nickel @todddnickel Wall to wall Jian Ghomeshi. That kid's finally made it. #JianGhomeshi

3


NEWS

THERESE GUIEB NEWS EDITOR

pimped out MAPLE BUILDING TO BE RENOVATED Therese Guieb × News Editor Next to the forest of Capilano University lies the Maple building, where the CSU’s main office and original lounge are located. “It’s really old and there are bugs everywhere,” says Janelle Venegas, a communications student at CapU. When the CSU Library Lounge opened its doors in 2012, the CSU Maple Lounge has only been popular to students who have classes near the building. But by spring of 2015, the Maple Lounge will be the talk of the campus after it undergoes renovations at the end of November. “The Maple building is one of the oldest buildings on campus and this [conference room] is kind of like the grossest area,” notes Sacha Fabry, vice president of University Relations and Services for the CSU. “A few years ago, we renovated and built the library lounge. And this [Maple lounge renovation] has always

been in the plans as kind of like the second step to revamp, remarket and to give back to the students as much as we can.” The Maple Lounge is set for construction by the end of November and will be closed for the duration of the holidays until midJanuary. As soon as the renovations are over, it will no longer hold the record of having the oldest carpet at CapU but it will be known as the trendiest space on campus. “We’re going to be putting in new carpet and new furniture. We’re going to be doing a new kitchen area and this [conference room] wall here is going to be torn down and glass windows will be put in place,” explains Fabry. The conference room in the lounge will be open for students to rent out for meeting purposes. “There really isn’t a good meeting space on campus except the one in the Library [Lounge] and the Treehouse,” he continues, “We’ll have a better office area, for students and for ourselves when we [CSU] want to have meetings.” In addition, wood lap panels along the walls and desks of the lounge

NEWS@CAPILANOCOURIER.COM

(similar to the Library Lounge) will also be integrated into the design of the new lounge. Although the Maple Lounge’s interior is not as appealing as the Library Lounge, its main advantage compared to any other spaces on campus is that it is the best place to take a nap. “I like that it’s quiet and it’s comfy and you can go there and be able to have the whole place to yourself,” says Venegas, “I like the part that you can lounge in it and fall asleep because it’s not too loud in there but also if it starts being loud it’s quiet enough that you can still go to sleep.” When the CSU conducted surveys about what the students envision the lounge to be like, the CSU found out that a comfortable space is what matters the most for students. “The Library Lounge is a space that is specifically for meetings and for presentations. The furniture [in the Library Lounge] is rigid and it’s not really that comfortable but it’s good enough to still do your stuff,” says Fabry, “But when we’re buying the furniture up here [Maple lounge] we’re going to try and keep comfort in mind…We’re hoping to have kind of a mixture of both professional and kind of relaxing space so students can still sleep if they have to.” The spaces for the lounges are leased to the

CSU by the university. “We are an entirely different organization, every student union at every university is different from the university itself,” reminds Fabry, “We offer, as your student union, your health and dental package. We advocated for the transit pass to help students get to school, that’s not the university that does that. That’s by the students for students.” Therefore, the funds that will be used in building the Maple Lounge will be taken from the student union membership fees that the students paid for. “A lot of it [the funding] is already amended by past referenda so students in the past said ‘yeah we want a building levy’,” he continues, “ The money that goes into building can only be just for building renovations and costs. We can’t transfer money [to other projects] or anything like that.” Along with the Maple Lounge renovation, the CSU hopes to have its own student union building in the future. “Other universities have their own student union buildings where they have their own food services, pubs, and spaces,” says Fabry, “It’s in our plan to one day be able to control our own spaces and give the students what they want without having to deal with a lot of contracts with the university.”

CSU gets civic CAMPUS HOLDS ADVANCED POLLING STATIONS Kevin Kapenda

THE CAPILANO COURIER.

VOLUME 48 I SSUE N O . 09

× Writer

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This November, British Columbians will head to the polls to cast ballots in this year’s municipal elections. The Capilano Students’ Union (CSU) wants to make sure students exercise their right to vote. They are making it easier for the students to do that by holding advanced polling stations on campus for the District and City of North Vancouver elections. As Vice President of external relations for the CSU, Brittany Barnes wanted to make sure students were informed on the municipal elections, since they only happen once every three years. “As VP external and a general advocate for youth engagement [with politics] I really want do as much as I can to get students out to the polls,” she says. Since young people are least likely to vote, she also wanted to make it easier for our students, many of whom live on the North Shore, to vote in the region’s municipal elections. “I reached out to the District and City to get polling on campus over the summer,” says Barnes. Barnes contacted the electoral officers of both the City and District of North Vancouver to inquire about possible advanced polling opportunities on campus. Since the BC-wide general election is on Nov. 15, booths on voting day at CapU were never an option. “I met with some resistance at first about advanced polling stations at Cap. My backup plan was to organize shuttles to area voting stations if we couldn’t get polls at Cap.” While Barnes explained that the District of North Vancouver initially resisted sanctioning advanced polling at CapU, City of North Vancouver mayor, Darrell Mussatto, did the exact opposite and pushed to have advanced polling set up on CapU’s campus for the city’s election after meeting with her. “Mussatto really championed the idea of having polling stations at Cap,” says Barnes. “He put a motion before council to have polling stations at Cap that was passed unanimously.” Mussatto agrees with Barnes that young people are least likely to vote in civic elections, and believes that advanced polling at CapU is

× Ekaterina Aristova a must in order to try to reverse that trend. “If you look at who votes, the lowest turnout is the 18 to 30 age group. When the [CSU] came to me about advanced polling, I said ‘that’s a great idea,’” explains Mussatto. Mussatto believes that engaging youth is important because many of the decisions made at the municipal level affect young people the most. “Issues like public transportation, bike lanes, recreation centres and most importantly affordable housing are all municipal issues that affect young people the most,” he says. After the City approved advanced polling stations at CapU, the District’s Chief Electoral Officer contacted Barnes to tell her that his office had changed their mind about not doing

the same. “A day later they called me to change their mind after the city council passed a unanimous motion to have polling at Cap,” Barnes recalls. When she asked the District why they reversed their decision, their officials didn’t offer much. “I am unsure as to why they changed their changed mind, and if it had anything to do with the City’s motion,” she adds. The CSU is still trying to make the voting process easier for students who don’t live in the District or City of North Vancouver. “We know that many of our students are actually coming from outside of North Vancouver. Therefore, on our [CSU] website we have a ton of information on all the other municipalities and what you can do to get registered and vote where you live,”

notes Barnes. Advance voting will take place on Nov. 6 in the CSU Library Lounge between 9 am and 2 pm.


news

talk that talk CHATLIVE DISCUSSION SERIES POPULAR AMONG STUDENTS Kevin Kapenda × Writer If you’re looking to broaden your horizons and get fed, ChatLive discussions are the perfect place to go to. ChatLive is a series of talks organized by the faculty of Arts and Sciences. Each week, a different department hosts a discussion that is led by one of its instructors. Each discussion has a theme related to that particular discipline and the discussions are held every week in Library 188 where lunch is also provided for students who attend. ChatLive was created in 2008, the same year Capilano College became a university. While ChatLive discussions are educational and informative, the meetings are also meant to be informal and fun. ChatLive director and Biology instructor Dr. Rachel Clearwater believes that the discussions are especially great for students because they are not required to read up on the topics before attending. “There is nothing required of students in terms of pre-preparation. The talks are meant to be informal, in a fun and engaging environment,” says Clearwater. To sign up for ChatLive, the student must log into their student account and register for the program as they would for any course. While ChatLive participants don’t earn credits for attending the discussions, students will get a “notation” on their transcript saying that they participated in the discussions. “[Notations] are good for students because it shows that they attended this faculty-run extra-curricular activity. You need to attend three ChatLive sessions a term to receive a notation,” explains Clearwater. The notation will be especially handy when students are applying for graduate programs that

multiple amount of factors. The first factor is the value that it brings to students who are looking to learn about topics outside of their major or area of focus. Bahrabadi is a Biology student at CapU, but has enjoyed many of the discussions at ChatLive this year that have very little to do with his field of study. “It’s nice to get other perspectives on issues from [instructors] different faculties,” he says, “Many of the issues that have come up are issues I’ve never even thought about.” Another reason why Bahrabadi feels the program has been an early hit with students is because of the notation participants get for attending. While Bahrabadi’s experience at ChatLive has been mainly positive, his enthusiasm for the program has led him to think of ways it can be improved. Bahrabadi argues that extending the duration of the weekly discussions could leave students with a better grasp on some of the issues that are being introduced to attendees. “A lot of students come, and there isn’t much time × Marla White [one hour]. All the students have their own opinions and want to have their say. Therefore, require or encourage extra-curricular participa- belong to other faculties. “[ChatLive] is great the lecture runs behind and often ends without tion when considering candidates. for meeting other instructors, but also other a clear conclusion or main thesis,” he says. In adChatLive discussions are as diverse as the students. We especially want to get students dition to some of the program’s logistical faults, Arts and Sciences faculty itself. Instructors talking with each other.” Another key compo- Bahrabadi also argues that some of the issues, from Humanities, Social and Applied Sciences nent of ChatLive is that it allows students to though interesting, are a little “too diverse” and are all expected to lead discussions this year. learn about other topics or issues that fall out- don’t really resonate with students. “It would “Each week we have a different faculty host side their field of study. “Try to make it as di- be nice to hash out some of the issues related to with a different topic. The topics are all across verse as possible so you can get out of the area the campus, like residence, the library or other the board from racism, to sexism, to psychol- you are focused in and get a new perspective, student issues. Some of the topics are really nice, ogy, and environmental issues as well as social maybe see if you want to take a course from but they don’t address student life on campus”. and popular issues like consumerism and social that faculty or subject,” suggests Clearwater. media,” says Clearwater. Clearwater believes So far, reception among students has been To learn more about ChatLive and to find out this is important because it allows students to strong. ChatLive participant Arvin Bahrabadi about the discussion schedules visit Capilanou.ca/ engage with other students and instructors that has attributed the large turnout at ChatLive ChatLive.html.

enactus us INTERNATIONAL ORGANIZATION COMES TO CAMPUS Carlo Javier × Lifestyle Editor

Dago region of Kenya. By building a sustained structure that will emphasize on the financial literacy of women in the region, Project Dago has helped develop the area’s bee keeping industry – now a growing, sustainable and carbon free business that’s also led by Kenyan women who have benefited from education in financial literacy, as well as entrepreneurial training. Enactus aims to build the same type of action at CapU. The students that are part of their integration in the campus will be putting up posters, and will host an information centre on Nov. 6 for any students who are interested in joining the NGO’s iteration at CapU. “It will look really good on a resume. If a group of students are interested and they want to have a good project, and they want to compete, Enactus has competitions in both regional and national levels in Canada,” says Battison, “It’s a great event, tons of students from all over the country show up. There will also be a lot of big time employers, so it would be a really good networking event.” As a home to a variety of dedicated and growing programs such as the School of Business, Communications and Illustration/Design: Ele-

× Vivian Liu ments & Application (IDEA) CapU stands as a fitting new partner for the international organization. “We are proud to welcome Capilano University to the Enactus community, where entrepreneurial and socially-conscious students come together to run community development projects, change individual lives and ultimately create a better world,” says Almond.

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There’s a new team in town. Capilano University is in the process of becoming the latest school to partner with Enactus, an international nonprofit organization dedicated to promoting sustainability through entrepreneurial projects. Stephanie Battison and a group of students have worked to start an Enactus group at CapU through a school project. “My group is part of the master’s program for International Business. We have to do a project on something to do about international leadership. We all wanted to do an organized group with CapU and involve a bunch of students,” says Battison. Through combining entrepreneurial action with projects that promote social good and sustainability, Enactus is able to put forth programs that translate the principles of conscious capitalism into social change. “Enactus Canada is shaping generations of entrepreneurial leaders who are passionate about advancing the economic, social and environmental health of Canada,” says Nicole Almond, president of Enactus Canada. Currently present in 60 campuses across Canada, Enactus’ engagement levels include nearly 2,500 students and 120 faculty advisors. The non-governmental organization also works with industry professionals and is active in 36 countries around the world. As its newest partner, CapU joins the ranks of eight other institutions in BC, which include UBC, SFU and BCIT among others. “They told us that they had CapU on their target list for a

while, but they haven’t had the chance to get in contact with anyone, and haven’t really had anyone try to establish it at CapU,” explains Battison. Part of the reason that prompted Battison and her cohorts to reach out to Enactus was driven by philanthropic ideals and the possibility of a sustained presence in a community, “We didn’t want to just start a project and have it end, we wanted to keep it up,” states Battison. One of the goals of their group is to not only launch Enactus Capilano, but also maintain the spirit of the organization in the school for years to come. Thus far, Battison and her group have reached out to the Capilano Undergraduate Business Enterprise of Students (CUBES) with the plans of becoming its own association at CapU. Despite their planned connection with CUBES, Enactus is not exclusive to students in the School of Business, “It can be for anyone. That’s what they encourage, it says on Enactus[.org] that its an entrepreneurial attitude, but it can be any student… any age, any program,” says Battison. Several of Enactus’ branches across Canadian universities have already set their projects in motion. Farm Bag, an initiative led by Enactus Okanagan College works to aid local food production and sustainability in competition with international markets, as well as the reduction of pollution that comes as the by-product of agricultural work. Farm Bag has diminished carbon dioxide production in the Okanagan by 4.3 metric tonnes. It has also led to over 47,500 lbs of crops, fruits, and vegetables staying in the Okanagan. Another testament to the success of Farm Bag is its movement into the national scale. Project Dago, led by Enactus Ryerson is aimed at addressing the HIV/AIDS situation in the

5


arts + Culture

ALVA TEE ARTS + CULTURE EDITOR

shaking it up THE CLASSIC COCKTAIL JUST ISN'T ENOUGH James Martin × Writer Watching a cocktail being made with a flashy show of bottle tossing, tall pours and fancy shaker techniques can easily make someone think that the drink itself can’t be too difficult to make. The truth is, although lots of practice does go into perfecting the tricks used in flair bartending to entertain clients, this skill set would be wasted without mastering the complex art of crafting a good drink first. Behind all the hype and creativity on display in the wild world of cocktails, there’s a massive body of history, theory and practice that goes into making each drink taste exactly the way the bartender intends it to. “There’s no one recipe to make a good drink,” explains Steve Matick, a Vancouver-based professional bartender, “But if you’re doing ‘serious’ craft cocktails, you tend to stick to certain set formulas that tend to work. No two whiskey sours between two bars will be the same, but I can almost promise you they’re going to follow a similar formula.” These formulas dictate the ratios for each type of ingredient needed to achieve the desired balance of flavours. For example, one of the most common ratios for a whiskey sour (and many other drinks) is the so-called “Golden Ratio” of 6:4:3 (6 parts spirits, 4 parts sweet, 3 parts sour), which works

out to 2 ounces whiskey, 1 ounce syrup, and 3/4 ounce lemon juice. Another common ratio used is 2:1:1 of the same components. Since there are multiple common ways to make any given drink, bartenders are free to add their own twist if they understand the relationships between their ingredients well. One could substitute a different spirit, use a flavoured syrup or two to introduce new elements to the sweet component, or replace lemon juice with a similar sour ingredient like lime juice, all while adhering to a formula. “Every place has its own house style, but most of them do stick to classic formulas and then build from there,” says Matick, “If you start deviating too much from these old classic ratios, [the drink] tends to… become really unbalanced. You start getting one flavour dominating all the others. It won’t necessarily be undrinkable, but the other ingredients kind of become superfluous.” A bar that can offer a truly unique drink has a lot to gain by attracting clients who are seeking something new. With the popularity of craft cocktails on the rise, many local restaurants are upping their mixology game with their own custom concoctions. However, maintaining taste in the pursuit of novelty can be a difficult juggling act, even when time-tested ratios are used. “Sometimes these crazy combinations are just gimmicks, showing off how crazy and innovative [a bar’s] cocktail

ARTS@CAPILANOCOURIER.COM

menu is,” Matick says, “They over-saturate a lot of flavours… but when you try to shovel so much into one drink you kind of lose all the individual constituent parts. It becomes this flat, blank, generic mix-y flavoured thing. You might get one or two of the sharper flavours there, but you’re going to lose all the nuances you could have gotten if you had just cut back on a few.” In a world where less is more, creative bartenders have dreamed up ways to make unique drinks without going overboard with flavours, such as freezing liquid ingredients in order to produce beer ices or liqueur sorbets. “They make a gin sorbet and put it into champagne,” says Matick, using an Easter Sorbet Punch recipe as an example, “As it melts, it contributes to the taste. It’s kind of a neat idea, like a more refined dessert cocktail.” He says that cocktail slushies were also a “big thing” for a while. Sometimes, the key is a surprisingly unusual ingredient. Matick cites recipes he’s heard about that include Chinese five spice powder or the replacement of egg with avocado paste as a fatty component. Some bars even use what is possibly the world’s most exclusive flavour: ambergris, a rare and expensive substance produced in the gut of sperm whales. “I heard it adds a ‘briny solidity’,” Matick muses. With so much focus on unique yet balanced flavours, it’s refreshing to know that there’s one drink where creativity is allowed to rein uninhibited: the caesar. A Canadian invention (and still hardly known beyond our borders), the caesar, in recent years, has developed its own set of rules.

literary insanity

× Jason Jeon

NOVELISTS EMERGE FOR ANNUAL CREATIVE WRITING PROJECT Alicia Neptune

THE CAPILANO COURIER.

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× Writer

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The minute the clock ticked over to midnight on Nov. 1, Halloween ended and National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) began. An internet-based novel writing project, NaNoWriMo challenges participants to write 50,000 words of a novel before December. As their slogan states, it is “30 days and 30 nights of literary abandon!” To participate, people register on the project’s website where they can create an author profile, post a novel synopsis and most importantly, keep track of their word count. Functioning as a virtual community, the site allows participants to add other users as buddies and follow their progress, or jump into conversations on the various forums available to find inspiration. Throughout the month, participants receive updates from NaNo Headquarters and pep talks from authors. This year’s pep talkers include Veronica Roth, author of the Divergent series, and Tamora Pierce, author of young adult fantasies including the Song of the Lioness and Immortals quartets. An archive of pep talks is also available for those looking for some extra motivation. Writing may be a solitary activity, but with over 300,000 participants last year, NaNoWriMo is anything but lonely. The community isn’t just online, either. With the help of Municipal Liaisons (MLs) in almost 600 regions around the world, participants can attend local events in their area. Carmen Fowle has been participating in NaNoWriMo since 2004. When a Municipal Liaison position opened up in Vancouver in 2012, she applied and was accepted. “I decided to apply because I wanted to give back to the program,” says Fowle, “I've had a lot of fun with it over the years, and want to ensure that other participants have the same experience.” MLs help to bring the online community

× Crystal Lee of NaNoWriMo into local communities. As Fowle explains, “MLs are responsible for answering questions from participants, running events such as write-ins and parties and having a presence in the forums to keep morale high.” It takes enthusiasm and endurance to keep writing throughout the month, and MLs are here to help. “I basically make sure people have all the support and encouragement they desire to take on the daunting challenge of writing a 50,000 word novel in 30 days,” Fowle adds. NaNoWriMo’s Come Write In program also helps local libraries, bookstores, and other community spaces to host their own write-ins and events. Author Carol J. Gavin and librar-

“Caesars are not about the caesar itself, it’s all about the garnish,” Matick says, referring to variants that can include pickled vegetables, shrimp, onion rings and even an entire burger skewered at the top of the glass. “My friend and I used to go on caesar quests where we’d go out and find the most ridiculous caesars,” he continues, “It’s like an appetizer to your meal. A lot of places are famous for their caesars and have taken that as liberty to see what they can do with the most absurd, eye-catching, appealing garnish. You can get some really interesting stuff like that in Vancouver these days.” As Vancouver’s craft cocktail community continues to expand, new drinks and exciting ways to serve them will continue to show up in trendy local bars and restaurants. However, only the cocktails that excel in both novelty and taste will have a chance at becoming more than a passing fad, and so even the craziest new drink might be based on a time-tested formula.

ian Anna-Marie Yang recently hosted a Come Write In kickoff at the Maple Ridge Library. Gavin, a freelance writer of both fiction and non-fiction, has been a participant since 2006, and is familiar with all the trials and tribulations of the month. Writing a novel in a month is a big commitment, and it can be difficult to balance that with family, school and work. For those making the attempt, Gavin has a few tips. “Solicit the cooperation of your family and friends,” she says, “They don’t take what you’re doing seriously — and they won’t unless you do.” Gavin sees NaNoWriMo as a writing marathon and believes writers should make prepara-

tory measures for all that it entails. “You need to stock up on supplies,” she says, “It takes a lot of caffeine and a lot of calories to get you through a non-stop month of writing.” The most important thing, however, is simply to write every day. “Build a habit, a habit of writing,” Gavin says. “What we want to do in November is to build your inspiration, develop your creativity, and get some words on the page.” Yet, every November, there are those who wonder what the point of it is. They wonder why people would waste a month writing rushed, and probably bad, first drafts that will only have to be fixed later. “I’ll let you in on a little secret,” Gavin says. “There isn’t a writer anywhere that doesn’t have to go back and fix their first draft, no matter how long it took them to create it.” Several notable novels began as NaNoWriMo drafts: Erin Morgenstern’s The Night Circus, Sara Gruen’s Water for Elephants,Rainbow Rowell’s Fangirl, and Marrisa Meyer’s Cinder just to name a few. As is often said, you can rewrite a bad draft, but you can’t rewrite a blank page. Once participants have 50,000 or more words of their draft complete, they can paste it into the website’s word count validator and officially “win” NaNoWriMo. Winners receive a number of prizes including a printable winner’s certificate, a discount on a piece of writing software called Scrivener, and two free paperback copies of their finished book from CreateSpace. For most, however, it isn’t really about the prizes. “The big satisfaction is your own,” says Gavin, “Your own completion of something that you started out to do.” For many, it doesn’t even matter if they reach that word count goal. Ultimately, National Novel Writing Month is an opportunity to set aside distractions and commit to writing. “The idea is to prove to yourself that you can get that idea out on paper,” Fowle says, “It doesn't matter if you write 50 words or 50,000, you still have more than you started with!” For more information, go to Nanowrimo.org.


arts + Culture

indie-synth meets jungle funk STUDENTS READY TO PARTY AT THE BILTMORE CABARET Heather Connor × Writer The Biltmore Cabaret has been housing shows for Vancouver locals for over 50 years and on Nov. 10, Capilano University’s very own event, Cap Live, will be taking place there. It will feature two Vancouver-based bands, Derrival and Jaguar, with multiple CapU students involved, showcasing just how talented our local musicians are. Jenna McCabe, Dexter Juric, Adam Mah and Carol Lai — four Arts and Entertainment Management (AEM) students at CapU, are the masterminds behind this event. “The four of us have really come together to put our idea to life,” says McCabe, “It takes a team effort to put on a show like this and I think all of us have done really well so far.” The talents of CapU students aren’t just hidden behind the scenes, but are highlighted on the stage as well. “What is unique about Cap Live is that both Derrival and Jaguar are made up of past and present Capilano University students,” says McCabe, “Students bring students together.”

Derrival, an up-and-coming local indiesynth rock band, created their name by merging the words “departure” and “arrival”. As it says on Derrival.ca, this name suits them perfectly because they are known for not being able to stay still onstage, exuding a type of energy their fans just can’t get enough of. In 2009, the five members of the band got together in Fort Langley to form their ensemble after initially meeting in high school. Today, they are proud to say that they have shared the stage with other talented musicians such as Hey Ocean! and The Zolas in the past. After getting the chance to perform at popular music festivals such as Rifflandia and the Squamish Valley Music Festival, Derrival is currently one of the top 12 finalists for the Peak Performance Project, a contest where the winner receives $102,700 to help further their music career. “It’s been a crazy experience so far and we’ve learned so much and have met so many talented people,” says Mah, who is Derrival’s lead vocalist and rhythm guitarist. Their inspirations are drawn from alternative bands such as Phoenix, CHVRCHES and Grizzly Bear as well as brilliant authors like Jack

Kerouac, Stefan Zweig and F. Scott Fitzgerald. “It sounds ridiculous but I get inspired by anything from relationships to watching an excess amount of the show, Sherlock,” says Mah, “We hope to have our music connect with people and to inspire others to play music and use it as an outlet to express themselves.” While only two members of Derrival are Cap students, every single member of the funk and R&B band, Jaguar, has been a student at CapU at some point in their lives. Thad Mai (trumpet), Jonny Tobin (keyboards) and Aaron Andrada (bass) are all in the Jazz Studies program while Dexter Juric (saxophone) is in the Arts and Entertainment Management program and Reuben Spyker (drums) graduated from the Jazz Studies program. The band met through mutual friends and was formed in August 2013. Having already played at popular Vancouver venues such as Fortune Sound Club and the Backstage Lounge, they are excited to wow the audience at the Biltmore Cabaret next. Including brand new material, Jaguar hopes to create music that will get everyone’s feet moving and bodies sweating. One of their biggest inspirations and influences for their music are historical jazz figures.

“Our genre is everything groovy, whether it be R&B or funk,” says Juric. “I'm personally a big fan of funk because of the many great artists in the past, such as James Brown and Tower of Power. Their music makes me want to write funk hits of my own that will make people dance and have a good time.” Jaguar likes to draw inspiration from fellow music lovers and take the feedback and reactions from the audience to help better them with their tunes. “Cap Live at the Biltmore is going to be a night of the ages,” says Juric, “Derrival, in my opinion, is one of Vancouver's best sounding indie/alternative rock groups and I'm really excited to share the stage with them.” Cap Live is a great chance for students to socialize and interact off campus. “We want people to have a good time, enjoy themselves and good music,” says McCabe. “It is rare to play a show with such vastly different genres,” adds Mah, “This is a once in a lifetime chance to see indie rock and jungle funk all on the same stage.” Cap Live takes place Nov. 10 at the Biltmore Cabaret. Tickets are $10 in advance, $15 at the door and $12 for students with valid ID.

ink spot on point ROCKSTARS OF THE TATTOO WORLD Faye Alexander × Features Editor

× J.R. Pinto who hails from the UK, followed by guest spots by Simon Drolet from Art Therapy Corp. and Kuba Kujawa from Bright Side Tattoo in Copenhgen this upcoming December. All appointments are booked through the artists directly via email, but generally with only one week to work in the shop, spaces book up quickly. “I would stay tuned in to the shop’s website if you are keen on getting in with a guest artist. They usually announce the guest spot well in advance,” says Lange, “So the earlier you can contact the artist, the better. You should consider what idea you are going with and only book if their work is something you are really

attracted to. It’s their personal style that you are booking in for, so allow them some room to create something just for you. It makes the tattoo you get special.” As tattoo culture continues to climb to the forefront, any connoisseur will be quick to spout the importance of choosing the right artist. When considering a permanent piece of art work to your personal canvas, explore the best artists the world has to offer without having to travel. Research upcoming guest spots at notable tattoo studios and peruse their portfolios — the wait will pay off.

T H E C A P I L A N O C O U R I E R . VOLUME 48 I SSUE N O . 09

Millennials are the first generation to bring the art of tattooing into the mainstream. In fact, now it seems more common to meet someone with a tattoo or body modification than not. Not many forms of personal expression are as telling as the permanent imprint of a tattoo. While some convey a story, others are done on a whim. But without a doubt, every brush of the hypodermic needle is a part of an individual’s personal history that can only be removed at the hand of a terrifying laser. Tattoo culture is now shifting from its reputation of being associated with deviant behaviour to a serious art movement. “It’s almost an exponential equation,” explains KC Lange, a Vancouver-based guest spot spectacular on permanent residence at Old Gold Tattoo in Bellingham, Washington, “I see tattooed bodies everywhere I go now. Kids are growing up with parents who are more tattooed than the generation before, so there are different social values at home. Tattoos are becoming something like a trademark.” Vancouver is home to hundreds of tattoo parlours that reach to the far ends of the city’s limits. From the sketchy dive parlours with their dizzying neon signs to the more notable parlours fronting as major retail storefronts like Adrenaline on Granville Street, one doesn’t have to go far to find some local talent. However, for the large amount of artists in the city competing for notoriety with the power of their portfolios, there is an equal amount of artists peddling cheaper work but for lower quality. “I think anyone seriously considering getting a tattoo needs to take it seriously. Doing your research, checking out portfolios and ensuring the studio is clean is important,” says Lange, “And expect high hourly prices for top artists. Cheaper rates usually mean you’re compromising on the overall artwork – and you don’t want to cheap out on something you’ll have with you the rest of your life.” Tattoo artists who have paved their way into their own studios, like old

school pro Chad Woodley of Sanitary Electric Tattoo Co. or Neo-traditional powerhouse Christina Christie of Black Rabbit Tattoo, are a hot commodity. These smoking inksmiths come with long waiting lists that may mean waiting upwards of a year for a session under the needle. With so many people interested in getting top quality work without the wait, many big name tattoo parlours host guest spots where amazing artists from around the world set up shop and bring their unique flavour to Vancity locals. A lot of these shops and artists alike use social media platforms such as Instagram and Facebook to promote upcoming guest spots. “The tattoo world definitely has its own rockstars, like Paul Booth or Scott Campbell,” says Lange, “There are artists in the game who have inspired this generation of tattooers. Once tattooing on television took off, shows like Miami Ink and Ink Master, it’s really brought the art form to a much larger audience. They show you how good it can be and now people are expecting that type of quality.” Importing guest artists from different cities is also a unique way to inspire local artists, who all start apprenticing and learning from more senior tattoo artists. “You play off the people around you, and artists all have their own style. It’s a great opportunity to learn something new and find out what makes these guys so successful,” says Lange. Gastown Tattoo Parlour has become a mainstay for guest tattoo artists coming to Vancouver. They are currently hosting Danielle Rose

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art shorts

ANDY RICE ART SHORTS EDITOR

MANAGER.CAPCOURIER@GMAIL.COM

StrumBellas IMPERIAL THEATRE, OCT. 30 Faye Alexander × Features Editor The Imperial was dark and the bar was as hot as the opener, the Provincial Archive, took the stage. While the couches lining the back of the venue were strewn with attendees sporting the same enthusiasm and weight as dirty laundry, the floor before the stage was completely bare. Yet, lead singer Craig Schram seemed to pay it no mind that the audience was more infatuated with the bar than his vocal stylings — and the band sent their soaring vocals through the crowd like a harpoon. The opening act delivered beautiful harmonies and some major Decemberists flashbacks. Aside from an embarrassing banjo flub, by the end of the set this Edmonton folk outfit had coaxed a few couch-dwellers from the back of the hall. Like a good Alberta band, they promised to join the crowd for beers during the anticipated Strumbellas set. If the crowd was wondering what was holding up the set, lead singer Simon Ward was outside the venue hacking a dart like

a true plaid-sporting Canadian folk rocker. The six-piece band took the stage, opening with the infectious stomp-along number “Home Sweet Home”, and suddenly the floor was packed. The synchronized foot stomping and intense clapping had the whole floor thumping with the delightful dash of tambourine and the thrill of violin. Isabel Ritchie, the lone female of the band, was so invested in her romance with her bow, her entire body seemed to play the music. Keyboardist David Ritter is a veritable hype man, which is unique to a folk music concert — he commands the stage and oozes charm any chance he gets to speak. He seems like the kind of guy you would have the best time with but would keep in the friend zone. Continuing to promote their latest release, We Still Move On Dancefloors, these Juno award winners put on an incredible live show — it’s like being at a really hip barnyard hoedown, but with more beards and awkward dancing. Delivering tunes like “Sheriff” and “Fire”, these guys showcased how well-crafted folk will always be relevant.

× Faye Alexander

× Leah Scheitel

avenue Q EVERGREEN CULTURAL CENTRE, OCT. 28 Alva Tee × Arts + Culture Editor

THE CAPILANO COURIER.

VOLUME 48 I SSUE N O . 09

Things that come with high expectations can often end in disappointment, but the acclaimed puppet musical, Avenue Q, hasn’t let its Vancouver audiences down. The Tony Award-winning production is currently on tour throughout the Lower Mainland and stopped recently at Coquitlam’s Evergreen Cultural Centre for a five-day run. With the perfect amount and combination of sexual, racist and political jokes, the humour in Avenue Q provided something for everyone to laugh or giggle at. And unlike the picture perfect scenarios and easy solutions provided on Sesame Street, Avenue Q is more cynical, and far more true to real life. Although there is an obvious resemblance between their respective characters,

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the different traits of the Avenue Q citizens definitely made them unique. The anticipation and excitement to see what crazy things they could think of next was consistent throughout the play, and catchy song after catchy song, it was hard not to be drawn to the exciting harmonized voices of the cast. The actors were just as lively as the puppets they playfully brought to life, and after a while the two seemingly became one. Only on the few occasions when the actors changed roles for which puppet they were holding did the disconnect become apparent once again. Overall, the production was relatable, full of humour and ripe with moments of all-out ridiculousness. There’s still time to catch Avenue Q on the Granville Island Stage from Nov. 20 to Jan. 3. But be forewarned — this isn’t the straight-laced cast from your muppet past. Avenue Q is rated R.

StickBoy

Rebel Women

VANCOUVER PLAY HOUSE, OCT. 30

METRO THEATRE, OCT. 25

Carlo Javier

Christine Beyleveldt × Writer Joan Bryans has made it evident that she favours retelling classical stories, seeing as most of her productions have a heavy Jane Austen influence. Rebel Women is yet another of her dazzling features to display candid heroines of classical 19th century society; however, Rebel Women takes the outspoken yet revered women to even more soaring heights than past productions. Rebel Women opens in the year 1903, with British suffragettes Christabel Pankhurst and her mother Emmiline Pankhurst campaigning for what would become widespread female suffrage after a tireless 15-year-long struggle. A number of witty and remarkable women were brought forward to tell their stories to the audience in Rebel Women, but the hallmark of the show was clearly Canadian suffragette Mary Richardson, portrayed by Jennifer Kaleta. An actress as sharp and

× Lifestyle Editor fierce as her character, in her day and age referred to as “the Slasher” for her famous destruction of a Renaissance painting that depicted women in an objectifying light. Using actual dialogue of the heroines, the verbatim touched on sensitive issues such as the force feeding of suffragettes on hunger strike, notorious prison conditions and the brutal beatings of the women observed outside the barred doors of the House of Commons. While it was a heavy topic, at times feeling like a history lecture, it wasn’t without its benefits. As historian Laura Thatcher Ulrich once remarked, “Well behaved women rarely make history.” A spoiler alert for readers, yes, they won the right to vote in the end. Rebel Women made its debut at the Jericho Arts Centre earlier this year and the performance was revamped and showed at Presentation House for the first week of October, and finished its run at Metro Theatre at the end of the month.

Stickboy is an innovative new take on anti-bullying, a topic much too common to any school system. Based on the book of the same name by Shane Koyczan, Stickboy left the packed audience at the Vancouver Playhouse with a powerful, resounding message about the complexities and nuances of bullying. Divided into three acts, Stickboy explored the evolution of the main character, simply named as the “Boy”, from a seemingly withdrawn yet witty child to a scarred and experience victim of bullying, and finally to the monster he had always despised. The musical provides a different take from the way bullying is typically portrayed in the media. It not only illustrates the life of the victim, but also the way all the pain and fear can ultimately transform fragility into anger – to oneself and to others. Led by a powerhouse performance by tenor Sunny Shams, Stickboy shone by putting the spotlight on its lead, and surrounding him

with a harmonious group of singers. Apart from the rousing standing ovation that Shams received at the curtain call, the loudest applause and cheers were reserved for a powerful duet between Shams and mezzo-soprano Megan Latham, who played his ever-loving grandmother. Also a highlight in the opera was its use of narration, where Koyczan himself delivered haunting monologues that guided the audience through the Boy’s transformative journey. Not to be overlooked was design team Giant Ant, who orchestrated the show’s eclectic animation that provided an effervescent background to the storytelling. Ultimately, the greatest gift Stickboy gave to its audience was the profound story about bullying. The show concluded with a message about the true difference between wishing and hoping. Unlike a wish, which vanishes like a firework, Stickboy, in its entirety, felt like hoping – it was a reverberating journey with a Boy, who was left with nothing to do but to hope.


Art shorts Chromeo VOGUE THEATRE, OCT. 25 Andy Rice × Managing Editor After an apocalyptic bass drop that probably cracked some lenses in the photo pit, Chromeo took to the stage at the Vogue Theatre on Oct. 25. The Montreal electro-funk duo was in town to unveil tracks from their new album, White Women, along with a mix of old favourites. The show was sold out, the crowd was hungry and Chromeo certainly didn’t let them down. From start to finish, they delivered a danceable mix of hits with the playful precision they’ve become known for. “Night By Night” was the set opener, an oldie from their 2010 album, Business Casual, and “Tenderoni” was up next, with the audience belting out every word. For much of the show, vocalist-guitarist Dave 1 danced between beams of white light, shredding away on his mirrored Gibson Les Paul, while P-Thugg rocked away like a mad scientist on just about everything else. Those dudes are made of swagger, and they know how to work a crowd better than just about anyone in the business today. “What’s up Vancouver?” belched the Lebanese keyboardist into his talk-box after the third song. “Can I hear you scree—eeem?”

With the Frampton-esque theatrics out of the way, the two abandoned their slick set list for a second to genuinely thank Vancouver fans for their support over the years — “since day one before the tour buses, before the Commodore, at that first show at the Brickyard in 2004,” recalled Dave 1. As the audience applauded, the fog rolled out for “Come Alive” “Bonafied Lovin’” soon followed, along with new single, “Sexy Socialite.” P-Thugg then spun over to the Wurlitzer to pound out the familiar intro to “Momma’s Boy” — Chromeo’s subtle ode to Supertramp — which was still full of life even a full seven years after its debut. “Over Your Shoulder,” the lead single off White Women, had the audience in a frenzy, especially when the wiry guitarist dove out to join them, and “Frequent Flyer”, “Fancy Footwork” and “Jealous” continued the wind-up toward the final encore, “Needy Girl.” Well after midnight, the duo left the stage exhausted and drenched in sweat, having treated their Vancouver fans once again to a lengthy set of infectious hooks, danceable beats and blinding lights. The venues might be getting bigger, but Chromeo hasn’t forgotten where they started, throwing an intimate party like it was 2004 at the Brickyard all over again.

Follow the Art Shorts team on Twitter @CAPCOURIERLIVE

Upcoming ART shorts...

lil b, clockwork indigo, les sins, bastille, fleetwood mac F

THURSDAY NOV. 6 Janet Panic, Kinnie Starr (early show)

THURSDAY NOV. 6 Sophie (UK) w/ Andrea, Tommy Jacob & Ex Youth

FRIDAY NOV. 7 Partynextdoor (early show) SOLD OUT!

FRIDAY NOV. 7 Rustie w/ ExYouth, Jolin Ras, Kempeh & Lechance

SATURDAY NOV. 8 Buck 65 with guests (early show)

SATURDAY NOV. 8 Kandyspace Showcase Marlon J English, Sailor Gerry & Seko

SUNDAY NOV. 9 Ladies Night feat. Jeff Timmons (98 Degrees)

TUESDAY NOV.11 Lil B “ The Basedgod” with guests

WEDNESDAY NOV. 12 Les Sins with guests

FRIDAY NOV. 14 Grand Buddah (MTL) Yung Schlang

MONDAY NOV. 17 Hip-Hop Karaoke (HHK) with guests

WEDNESDAY NOV. 19 Elephant Man Jahfus, DJ Abel

SATURDAY NOV. 22 Just Blaze, Keys N Krates Flipout & Marlon J English

SATURDAY NOV. 29 Ryan Hemsworth Lechance, Kempeh & Jolin Ras

T H E C A P I L A N O C O U R I E R . VOLUME 48 I SSUE N O . 09

SUNDAY NOV. 2 Baza Dance Salsa Class Grand Opening

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THE CAPILANO COURIER.

VOLUME 48 I SSUE N O . 09

FEATURES

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“Elections are an opportunity to focus on one thing that we all share, and that is the political community in which we live,” explains Timothy Schouls, a political science professor at Capilano University, “My sense is that this is a noble and important exercise – an exercise in civic mindedness and developing commitments to work side by side with one another, in shaping political communities that are both good for us individually and serve our own interests but [also] good for our neighbours.” Every three years, people head to the polls to elect their local governments and this year the election date is set for Nov. 15. Every civic township in BC votes on the same date and local councillors, school board trustees and mayors are voted into power on that day for a three-year term. Municipal elections have alarmingly low turnout, especially amongst young people. Yet, the youth vote is important to any election and does matter at all levels of government. Without their votes, a large segment of the population is denied a voice on city council. “I think what often happens is that at the municipal level, we don’t have a strong sense of what the mandate of what municipal governments are and in what ways they directly affect our lives besides garbage collection and the repair of local roads, and the sort of stuff that doesn’t seem all that interesting,” Shouls explains. Most of the topics and bylaws discussed at the municipal level can seem drab and tedious, thus leading to people often overlooking the elections. In the 2011 municipal elections, the average turnout across every BC municipality was a mere 29 per cent – not nearly enough to support a proper representation of the population to the governing council. According to Schouls, candidates need to provide more education to their constituents and engage more with the public, especially young voters such as CapU students. “It could be the case that politicians or potential municipal councillors or people running for parks board and school trustees and so on just have to do a better job of educating us – all of us – about the nature of the politics they are involved in, and how important it is to our everyday sort of quality of life. And then extending the invitation for us to be active with them on some of these areas.” To help CapU students understand the mayoral candidates for the City of North Vancouver, we sent Matt Jolliffe to investigate.

North Vancouver City Council candidates, platform and topics of issue. unity Living

FAYE ALEXANDER FEATURES EDITOR

of the city, Pringle plans on slowing down development. He also fears that “a constant quest for affordable housing” will eventually lead lower Lonsdale into looking similar to the Downtown Eastside. A for his views regarding creating and maintaining affordable housing on the North Shore, Pringle states that he could live somewhere else and pay considerably less to live, but is an ardent fan of North Shore living. “I will stay in North Vancouver at a premium because it is considerably better than other places, such as Hamilton,” he says.

George Pringle George Pringle seems to be an eccentric character. When asked at the mayoral debate on Oct. 26 what he would do to deal with the increasing number of rodents in the City of North Vancouver, he quickly responded that he would “round them up and ship them to West Vancouver”. A disabled military veteran, Pringle likes to remind us on his blog, Pringle4mayor.blogspot. ca, that he lives a simple life and has made it known that if elected, he will decrease his salary by $20,000 — “double the level of what a councillor receives." Pringle claims he would also eliminate his vehicle allowance and donate money earned through attendance at meetings around Metro Vancouver to charity. All in all, that seems pretty darn reasonable and not something you hear too often from politicians. Pringle is no stranger to politics in the City of North Vancouver. He has been involved for a number of years in various capacities, including running for mayor in 2011, acting as a city council watcher, operating politically-based blogs dealing with local politics, and, as the North Shore News astutely puts it, volunteering “on scores of … conservative political campaigns”. Pringle’s platform is abundantly clear: he wants to amalgamate the City and District of North Vancouver. On his blog, he states quite simply that he “will be running with a party name, Amalgamate North Van right on the ballot to inform voters clearly the most important issue to [him].” He plans on bringing about amalgamation of the two municipalities, which split in 1907, by getting party members elected to the councils of the city and district and pushing for a motion in council to begin talks with the provincial government to hash out the necessary details to begin amalgamation proceedings — eventually leading to a referendum. Pringle has also let it be known that he does not want any incumbents elected to city council, rather, “three men and three women, all business people so they know how to deal with money in the real world.” In addition to his ultimate goal of amalgamation, Pringle also vows to make the Lonsdale Energy Corporation, currently a private company in which the City has holdings, a public city-run company. Furthermore, as opposed to Mayor Mussatto’s current densification model

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Kerry Morris, just like Pringle, has a familiarity with municipal politics on the North Shore, as his father served the city for 35 years in various capacities. Morris began his career in the oil business, working for Imperial Oil (Esso), as a deck-hand on tankers, eventually working his way up through the company only to fall victim to downsizing, and eventually began operating various start-up companies primarily focused on petroleum and other energy distribution. As an ‘oil guy’, it was refreshing to hear him speak of his opposition to the proposed pipeline projects in BC’s waters. “The only people who will benefit from such projects are the federal and Albertan governments, leaving taxpayers of BC on the hook because, simply put, the insurance for the tankers simply does not cover the cost of potential oil spills,” says Morris. According to his website, Morris decided to re-introduce himself to civil politics because, as the majority of millennials can attest, the idea of buying property on the North Shore is something that very few will likely be able to attain. This idea, however, is something very difficult to enact considering the housing market is something that exists outside of the control of municipal government. Morris is running on an extensive platform. First, he claims that city hall is plagued with conflict of interest, receiving donations from developers and special interest groups. This is something he states he will refuse to partake in. He also asserts that he will not support the sale of public assembly lands, such as Lucas Centre, for “residential redevelopment” — instead pushing for redevelopment into public spaces. Morris also

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hopes to halt the relocation of the North Vancouver bus depot, and have it moved to a temporary facility until a long-term solution can be established. Furthermore, Morris wants to slow down building development, create better traffic flow on roads and highways, increase street parking, halt the proposed development of a ferris wheel at the shipyards, and turn the current shipyard plaza into a multi-use venue without any fixed attractions. While operating under what looks like a fairly positive platform, Morris is not without controversy. In an e-mail distributed to city council and mayoral candidates prior to the most recent debate, it was shown that Morris appears to have a bit of a temper issue. Covered in an issue of the North Shore News in 2009, Morris was arrested at the Telus office in Burnaby for allegedly threatening to take hostages, an allegation he vehemently denies. The altercation began over an overpayment of a bill he was hoping to receive a refund on. Pringle outlined further issues that h a ve p l a g u e d Morris on his campaign blog, which include using bigoted language in communication with an officer of the court after cross-examination in trial, and requiring RCMP officers to be in attendance at city council meetings due to violent outbursts.” “If I need to be arrested for standing up for my rights, then I will be,” says Morris when asked whether his temper would affect his ability to perform as mayor.

Kerry Morris

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ON the Cover

sAmANthA smith A designer, letterer, illustrator, and scuba instructor wrapped into a neat little package named Samantha Smith. Samanthaleighsmith.com

Darrell Mussatto Mayor Mussatto is a lifetime City of North Vancouver resident who has been serving the local community in various capacities since 1993. Prior to his municipal service, the mayor worked as a decorated paramedic as well as a teacher. Beginning in city council, Mayor Mussatto sought mayoral status in 2005, where he has remained for the past nine years. In his tenure as mayor, a great deal of transformation has occurred within the city, particularly in regards to development. Lower Lonsdale especially, looks starkly different than it once did, and the

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"All voters cast their votes in any election, due to "enlightened selfinterest", according to my Poli-Sci degree from UVic. Young adults and students are primarily renters who are often unaware that part of their rent is due to municipal taxation. Only by participating in the municipal governance system can they attempt to affect their living situation, ensure that there are legal living spaces rather than illegal spaces that may not meet the standards of the law." - George Pringle

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T H E C A P I L A N O C O U R I E R . VOLUME 48 I SSUE N O . 09

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establishing administrative policies that ensure the social, economic and environmental health of the municipality.” For their duties, they are compensated with a pay of $96,489 per year. To today’s youth, it may seem fruitless to vote in an election to decide who coordinates the garbage pickup in a neighbourhood and the paving of dead end road. However, the decisions made in city council affect everyone in the municipality whether it’s noticed or not, and therefore everyone should voice their opinion on who gets the job. The easiest way to do that is to vote. Without people examining the social landscape, democracy is missing a key element – the vote of the people. So get educated, ask questions and vote based on what you think is not only best for you, but for everyone in your area.

nancially. He wants to continue such housing expansion as well as maintaining a set amount of rental units in any new condominium development that may arise. Voter turnout in municipal elections is most often lacklustre, specifically in regards to young adults, and Mussatto seems to understand this predicament. “As adults in their late teens, early 20’s, young adults are worrying about their educations and beginning their careers, not paying municipal taxes, so it is understandable that there is little attention payed to the on-goings of municipal affairs. But just because you’re not paying taxes”, he says, “Doesn’t mean you shouldn’t care, because the vote of the youth influences recreational funding, and if you don’t live at home, finding a place to live within your means is important, and so is how you commute to and from work, school and recreational activities.” In order to persuade the younger vote, Mayor Mussatto as well as the District of North Vancouver have managed to have an advanced polling station placed on campus at CapU on Nov. 6, where you can register to vote municipally as well as cast your vote dependent on your riding. Elections are important, and fundamental to a democratic social structure. It may be time-consuming to research and educate ourselves on the different candidates and platforms, but educated voting is what democracy needs to succeed and be a proper representation of the population. “Voting is an opportunity - it’s an invitation I think - on the part of our political community, to get involved in an exercise that elevates us above and beyond our own individual lives,” says Schouls, “Then we survey the political landscape and see what the choices are relative to the candidates that are offering themselves and the perspectives they hold on these issues, which are all ultimately about what our communities hold as their fundamental priorities and what direction they want to go in.” Voting in municipal elections for city councillors and mayors may seem less important than voting on a federal or provincial level, but it still holds its value. As evidenced by the Rob Ford years in Toronto, a mayor can have a great impact on the reputation and morale of a city, along with a direct influence over bylaws and tax spending that impact our daily lives. As stated on the City of North Vancouver’s website, Cnv.org, “Your Mayor and Councillors are responsible for providing effective leadership and

Mayor is proud of it. The completion of the Spirit Trail, a new city hall, and new library are all things that stand out as crowning achievements during his tenure, and love him or hate him, he has ushered in beneficial change to the city. According to the mayor, he is always looking for “‘win-win’ solutions, as opposed to the negativity” he says runs rampant in his competitors. Mayor Mussatto’s primary platform for reelection is much the same as in the past. Public transportation is on the top of his list. “North Vancouver hasn’t seen an increase in public transport in seven years” explains Mussatto. He states that in the New Year, the provincial government will be having a public transit referendum in which he and his mayoral counterpart in the District will vote “yes” in hopes of increasing funding for public transit to the North Shore. How a potential increase will be paid for he is unsure, but he suggested that a tax increase was most likely. Aside from pushing for an increase to public transit in North Vancouver, Mussatto plans on increasing the development of public spaces by finishing the development of the shipyards, renewing the H a r r y Je rome Recreation Centre by updating the facility, and increasing the number of housing choices available to his citizens, particularly young adults. One form of this housing increase the Mayor has been involved in is the development of secondary suites and coach homes on existing properties in hopes of increasing the availability of affordable housing and benefitting the property owners fi-

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FEATURES

FAYE ALEXANDER FEATURES EDITOR

S P E C I A L F E AT U R E S @ C A P I L A N O C O U R I E R . C O M

by Razan Talebian

With midterms on the way, we are approaching an indisputable feeling of stress. Some of us break out in sweat, varying from the beaded variety appearing on the brow to overpowering perspiration. For some, stress can elevate, resulting in some more excessive side effects like hyperventilation and major anxiety attacks. Resuscitate yourselves — there are certain ways to beat the stress brought on by exam season. Take note of these great ways to eliminate some of the anxiety from your schedule and add some of these helpful tips to your daily routine — we’ve got your back.

BALANCE

MINDSET Nobody has the power to psych yourself out more than yourself. Controlling your thoughts will always coincide with controlling your actions, so keep a bright mindset to be able to overcome anxiety. "You can't do anything about the past, but you can change how you feel about attacking things in the future,” says Dr. Marc Hudon from the Integrated Wellness Centre in Burnaby. Dwelling on a past exam that you failed or didn't score well on before has nothing to do with your future potential. If you get the chance to look over your mistakes, don't take that time for granted because you could learn

a thing or two about ways to change the way you study. "Stopping your negative thoughts and taking captive of those feelings and changing them by thinking logically and letting go of certain past problems, and replac[ing] that with healthy thinking," explains Dr. Hudon. Your positive emotions will be heightened with the simple words "I can" rather than "I cannot." Don't let the past effect you — every day is a new day with new goals.

SUPPORT Anxiety affects the part of the brain that helps you to communicate, so emotional symptoms may get to you, making you feel a sense of doom. Try to take a minute to communicate to yourself, but if that’s not doing the trick, it’s time to reach out for some additional support. "Realize that you will need a lot of support at this time," Dr. Hudon says, "It doesn't make you weak for asking help, it makes you stronger." Think of one person in your life that is always there for you. Think about who you have in your life that supports you. It can be your mother, father, siblings or friends. It doesn’t have to be somebody who is much more educated than you to be able to guide you through your studying. Just by opening up to various people about your stress will allow those people to give you space to breathe and support you at the best of their ability. It is a great advantage to have the ability to rely on others for the little

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The simple solution is to acknowledge why you are stressed, and accept what you must accomplish to overcome it. Sometimes the most obvious advice is the easiest to overlook. If you are anxious about an upcoming exam, balancing your regular responsibilities throughout the day will make a huge difference. “The more you study, the less stressed you are,” says Greg Robinson, a laboratory supervisor in the Arts and Entertainment Management program at Capilano University, “If you don’t do anything to let off steam, then it can be counter-productive. “Some students may study for a hours upon hours which does not allow the brain to rest and digest all of the information rushing into our brains, as opposed to remote memorization,” Robinson explains, “If you understand the narrative of historical events you can remember

the details better than just trying to commit to memory.” Just like with food, it helps to take your time to chew it up into small pieces, then let it digest until it is comfortably sitting — instead of raging through the whole plate. In other words, take your time studying the small details, and try to understand it sufficiently before challenging yourself through the whole textbook. “It’s not feeling prepared which makes you stressed out,” says Robinson, “So it’s about finding a balance between doing the work that needs to be done and giving your mind and your body the rest, relaxation or recreation that they need.” Making a reliable schedule that you can follow while balancing your time to do other activities in between would also release stress and will aid with anxiety.

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× Ksenia Kozhevnikova

things so that you can focus on your priorities. Studying in groups is a great tool to keep yourself grounded. Call up a couple friends or even classmates and ask to set a study date. It’s even a great opportunity to talk to the cute guy in your class that you've been dreaming to talk to. As long as you all focus on what needs to be done, it can be very productive. Having insight on other students’ ways of thinking and studying will help you approach the way you study in a different way, exposing different learners to various study methods. What works for some may not work for others, but it’s never too late to find out what works best to your unique way of digesting information. If the thought of a group study date rears up more anxiety than the exam itself, make time to talk with your teacher — they will always be happy to help.

EXERCISE The brain releases endorphins as you stay active throughout the day. These endorphins make you feel happy, which is ideally how you want to feel before cracking down to study. Exercise is a pharmaceutical-free way to relieve stress, and there is no better way to do it. Exercising even moderately has been proven to significantly lower anxiety. Blast some music through your headphones and go for a jog, even if it is around the block a couple times. There are countless options available, even here at CapU, including yoga. Yoga is very helpful with teaching individuals breathing exercises which helps develop natural calming techniques for participants. Breathing exercises and mediation practices like yoga can help anyone to develop useful skills in anxiety reduction. "Finding activities you enjoy is the key to having a good workout," says Andrew Serantin, manager at Gold's Gym in Burnaby, "If you are forcing yourself to do something you do not want to do, then you will not get results." Finding a way to work out in a fun way will help, because you will be less prone to give up.” Challenging yourself to a good workout will make you feel energized, which is a winning ingredient to an intense study session. Get motivation from your friends if you like to be in a group, you can play a sport that you all enjoy. Find fun ways to study and be excited to do well on your exam, because a couple hours today has the potential to make a huge impact in a couple of years down the road. By developing a strong work ethic, creating a support system and making time to ensure your body is running like a well-oiled machine, there won’t be much to stress about — other than that cute guy or girl in your class.


Calendar Mo 03

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Our Ecological Backyard Bosa Film Centre 7 pm $ - free

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Slowdive M 03

Commodore Ballroom 8 pm $35

capilanocourier.com

@capilanocourier

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Scars on 45 Media Club 9 pm $13.50

The Rise & Rise of Bitcoin M 03

Robson Square 7 pm $ - a bitcoin?

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The real name of this event was Our Ecological Backyard: Review of Conservation and Development in Howe Sound, but that was way too long to fit into the title. Hell, that’s almost too long to fit into a Tweet. And the calendar font is small enough already. Anyways, it’s a panel discussion featuring environmentalists and experts who know what they’re talking about. Points for environmentalists!

These guys are a dream-pop quintet from England. Or at least that’s what Wikipedia tells me. They are used to playing run-down bars in Brooklyn, the ones that no one knows about except for the hipsters of the day. Those bars have everything: a new form of shaving, pure cocaine and snoring cats as door prizes. But alas, we live in boring old Vancouver and you’ll have to settle for seeing them at the Commodore. Suckers.

Now, I know I wonder about a lot of things that I probably shouldn’t, but did these guys have to get 45 scars before they got a band name? They had roman candle standoffs in the studio until 45 scars were made. 44 – nope, not enough. “Hit me again, Charlie!” Is anyone else thinking that? Shit, now I’m going to have to go to the show in hopes they buy me a beer and tell me the story. Come with?

We be getting out of the house for this week’s movie Monday! I have a friend who is so into bitcoin. Last year, he was hired by somebody (I’m assuming someone with one of those “Deep Throat” user names) to sit by an ATM at a Waves coffee shop downtown and tell everyone who will listen about why bitcoin is a better version of currency. So he will likely be here, at this networking event promoting bitcoin and a new documentary.

All-Candidates Debate

Band Together

Bear's Den

Deltron 3030

CSU Library Lounge 11:30 am to 1 pm $ - knowledge/education

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Orpheum Theatre 7:30 pm $79

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Biltmore Cabaret 9 pm $16

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Commodore Ballroom 9:30 pm $30

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Wow, the adults of the North Shore are really making it easy for students to vote in the municipal elections. The candidates in the local riding are coming to campus to host a forum for students, so we can ask all of our urgent questions. Come armed with queries on how they will improve student life and if they will help provide jobs for you after Cap life. If you don’t, who the hell will?

I know, I know – what the hell am I doing promoting an event that is more than your weekly grocery budget. But I swear it’s for a good cause. The Canadian Alliance to End Homelessness is hosing a benefit concert featuring Blue Rodeo, High Valley and Dustin Bentall. Proceeds go to supporting Canada’s homeless – way better than paying to see Sarah McLachlan and her dying dogs.

It wouldn’t take a rocket scientist to see that I put a lot of events at the Biltmore in this calendar. Some may even say too many, but here’s my reasoning: it’s close to my house. And I need a social life sometimes, so I check events out there first. I’m getting old, and want to be able to walk home at a reasonable hour yet still have a social life. #selfish

Admittedly, I have never heard of this guy(s) before but from what I’ve researched, it’s an American hip hop group. I am, however, familiar with the opener, Kid Koala. I saw him play at the original Osheaga Festival in 2007, in Montreal. It was also the first time I ate mushrooms for “recreational purposes” and hallucinated throughout his entire set. Some moments in life are just better than others.

Music Drive

New Politics

3rd Annual Comedy Night to End Diabetes

Tales from the West End

Earls Vancouver (1095 Mainland) 6 pm $20

JJ Bean (1209 Bidwell) 6:30 to 8:30 pm $ - over-caffeinating

Café Deux Soleils 8 pm $5

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Rio Theatre 7:30 pm $20

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I lived on the Drive for two years, and while walking to random jazz bars in my attempt to be classy, I would always pass Café Deux Soleils, and it was packed most nights. Not just packed, but line ups out the door with hooligans loitering all over the streets. But who can blame them: it’s chill, cheap and usually has good music or poems or whatever those creative kids are getting into these days.

No, this is not a lecture from Thomas Muclair about the importance of new politics in the platform of the New Democratic Party, because no one would go to that. This is an alt-rock band from Denmark, and they’re brining friends. Somekindawonderful and Bad Suns will also be there. Better than Muclair’s friends – he would just bring Justin Trudeau and Stephen Harper.

Vancouver’s finest comedians gather at Earls (whose own abilities are debatable) to raise money for the Canadian Diabetes Association. Ivan Decker will be there, along with door prizes and silent auction items. If you have to go to Earls, why not make it for the benefit of a good charity?

Is it just me or is JJ Bean spawning all over Vancouver? If there is a corner venue vacant for more then six weeks, sure as shit it will turn into another Beaner in the next few months. It’s like that guy in high school who can’t stop impregnating all of your friends. Anyways, this JJ Bean is hosting a night of tales about the West End. Apparently there were tunnels and illicit activity – both very cool things.

MACSquerade

Mindfulness Meditation Workshop

Advanced Polling on Campus

Sophie

North Van Holiday Inn 6:30 to 10:30 pm $10

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Library 119 11:30 am $ - Namaste

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CSU Library Lounge 8 am to 2 pm $ - democracy baby

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Fortune Sound Club 10:30 pm $13

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Of all school and campus events, this one sounds the coolest. Not only do you get to dress up, you also get to wear a mask (suck it, Suit Up!). And I’m picturing it will play out like a scene out of Gossip Girl where I get to make out with the hot guy for at least 20 seconds before he realizes I’m not the hot girl he wanted to suck face with. But it will be too late – he can’t take it back. Nor can I take back the three weeks I lost to Gossip Girl on Netflix.

Let me get serious here for a second: currently I’m doing a lot of research on mindfulness for a project I’m working on with a psychologist. And it has been an up and coming thing – apparently they are doing mindfulness mediation in elementary schools now. Interesting. If it’s your jam to chill out for a while, be sure to hit this up.

Another thing on campus that is giving you no excuse not vote – on Tuesday, they informed students, and today, they are making it nearly impossible not to cast your ballot. Everyone passes the Library Lounge at least once a day. This time, stop, take a moment of thought, and check off a box. It’s easier than writing one of these calendars.

Sophie is the name of a UK dance group performing at Fortune. That felt odd to write: “dance group” and “Fortune Sound Club” don’t really sound like they should be best friends. But apparently they are. There are also guests of Andrea and Tommy Jacob. I’m not sure if these are performances or just friends of Sophie. Oh man, I’m confused.

Columnist Holly's Birthday

Blonde Redhead

Giant vs. Silvertip

Wayne Brady

All Day Everywhere in the World $ - something sparkly

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Rickshaw Theatre 9:30 pm $25

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Pacific Coliseum 7:30 pm $20

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River Rock Casino 7 pm $69.50

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Most of you don’t know Holly Pavlik, our movie columnist, so you’re just going to have to take my word for it when I say that she is the fucking coolest. Seriously, and here’s why: she loves and respects fairies, has a signed copy from the creators of Cards Against Humanity and is the funniest person you’ll meet. So join me in wishing her a happy birthday and buying her all the sparkles in the world.

Blonde Redhead is an American rock band, and one that I really like. Last time I tried to see them in 2009, I ate a dirty strawberry on the way to the show, and ended up so violently ill, I missed four days of school to unloading bowels. And this time, they are here on a Friday, meaning I will likely miss it due to misplaced commas. Some girls just can’t win.

If you actually enjoy watching the great Canadian waste of time that is hockey but don’t want to spend your student loan on a ticket, the Vancouver Giants may be your jocks to watch. You get the same excitement at half of the price and with less jerks for fans. I bet I’m going to get hate mail for my perspective on the Canucks and to those people, I say, change my point of view. It’s my challenge to you.

This guy is probably best remembered as the most skilled yet underrated guy on Whose Line is it Anyways? Really, this guy is extremely talented but was never really able to find the right audience for it, delegating him to shitty career as a day time talk show host. I bet he’s worth the admission price, but maybe not that and the trek out to Richmond.

Bleachers

Buck 65

Nerdfest IV: A Night of Epic Fantasy

Tony Bennett

Rickshaw Theatre 8 pm $15

River Rock Casino 8 pm $ - seeing a legend

Rio Theatre 7 pm $27

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Fortune Sound Club 8 pm $25

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The only reason I know of these guys is because Lena Duham’s boyfriend, Jack Anotoff, is the main guy behind it. I’m not a huge fan of either of them, but when I went on my first Tinder date ever, the guy claimed to be best friends with the two, and wouldn’t stop first naming them. “Jack and I do this” and “Lena really likes my dog.” It was suffocating, but not enough to turn me off of Tinder. So I won’t be going for fear of running into their number one fan – my ex-Tinder date.

This should be cool, as one of Canada’s most prominent hip hop artists is set to entertain fans at the Fortune Sound Club. The Courier’s darling, Carlo Javier, has been pretty excited about this even for awhile, but I think it’s because Buck 65 has a cool hair cut and Carlo is doing research into the next Mohawk to get. Go for the hair and stay for the music? Or maybe stay for Carlo to buy you a drink.

Chris Hardwick has made nerds cool again. Seriously, this guy is the nerdiest of all of them, and has made a career out of being a nerd, and I seriously reconsider my fate as a crazy cat lady if he wanted to take me for a date. Apparently he’s single – yum. Anyways, I’m thinking of going to this to look for Chris Hardwick 2.0 and start dating him. I hear there are sword fights and everything. #cool.

Yeah, at $140 this event is a little expensive, but c’mon, it’s Tony Fucking Bennett. And he isn’t exactly a spring chicken anymore, and therefore I’m willing to bet all of my SNL paraphernalia that this is the last time this crooner will grace the River Rock stage. And I have a lot of SNL paraphernalia. Take a date – this dude created romance.

Ouxi Taiwanese Puppetery Festival

The Smalls

All Them Witches

Blue Dot Tour

Museum of Anthropology 3 pm $ - museum admission

Su 09

While the entire fest is featured at the museum all week, this is the culmination of it all. Visiting Taiwanese puppeteers will work with invited First Nations artists to create some odd impromptu work. If you want to see the fest – and you should, it sounds cultural – this would be the perfect time to go. And museums are sexy.

Commodore Ballroom 9:30 pm $34.50

Su 09

If you don’t know who The Smalls are, let’s just sum it up and say that they were a popular Canadian hard rock band while you were still pooping in your pants as a child. But do yourself a favour and listen to Waste and Tragedy. It works as a constant reminder as to why people are nostalgic for the 90s and the music that was birthed in it. Do yourself another favour and go to their show. Who knows when they will be around next.

The Cobalt 9 pm $10

Su 09

The Cobalt is cool, and it’s one of the few places left where I can go and be sure that I haven’t dated anyone on the staff. Nashville-based rockers are gracing the stage to jam out to songs from their latest album Lightning at the Door. What would you do if you opened the door and a bolt of lightning there, waiting for you? I bet you would be shocked.

Orpheum Theatre 7 pm $39 and up

Su 09

This is a shit mix of people: David Suzuki, Neil Young, Raffi, Feist, the Barenaked Ladies, and Margret Atwood are all on stage, and my guess is that it’s for Canada’s great karaoke contest? I have no idea what they are doing all together. My money is on Suzuki winning the karaoke competition with a unsurpassed rendition of “Man, I Feel Like a Woman” by Shania Twain. Worth it.

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@capilanocourier

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opinions

GABRIEL SCORGIE OPINIONS EDITOR

forget the frats GREEK HOUSES NEED TO GROW UP Simon Thistlewood × Writer Recent activities by several fraternities have revealed that they’re little more than dens of inequity, with their members happily fulfilling the worst clichés of privileged jocks. Frat members live in an imaginary 1950s world of male patriarchy and privilege, divorced from reality and ethics. Fraternities and their ‘bro’ behavior have recently revealed that they inhabit and promote a culture that is shallow, vacuous, and dysfunctional. This September, a California State University Northride fraternity chapter shut down after a pledge died during hazing. In Keene, New Hampshire, this October, college kids and frat boys rioted, causing widespread damage. Remember, when low-income African Americans riot in Ferguson, it’s because they inhabit a society that systematically discriminates against them. When affluent white kids riot, it’s because, according to Steven French, a rioting student in an interview with WMUR “It’s just like a rush. You’re revolting from the cops…It’s a blast to do things that you’re not supposed to do.”

× Amy Mayer The Kings College House of Ronald Reagan (HRR) launched a counter-protest during the #FloodWallStreet march in New York City, disrupting one of the largest climate change marches of recent times. The HRR brought with them a cutout of Ronald Reagan, and their stated mission of defending capitalism against those who criticized its effects on the climate. Closer to Vancouver, everyone remembers the great chant sung during frosh week over at UBC’s Sauder School of Business last year. "Y-O-U-N-G at UBC, we like 'em young, Y is for your sister, O

OPINIONS@CAPILANOCOURIER.COM

is for oh so tight, U is for underage, N is for no consent, G is for go to jail." There is a great and real need for student organizations to exist and to respond actively to the needs the students. James Hanson, who was the chief climatologist at NASA, warned that full exploitation of Canada’s tar sands would accelerate a process wherein “20 to 50 per cent of the planet’s species would be driven to extinction. Civilization would be at risk.” One good example of student organizations is the Glasgow University Climate Action Society, engaging is the divestment movement, which calls on universities to remove all fossil fuel properties from their endowments. Realistically, the brunt efforts of these progressive movements are being driven by student unions and clubs, not frats. There need to be more stories like this coming out of our Greek houses, instead of more immature acts by privileged children. The transformation of universities from houses of learning into corporations run for profit is an area where motivated efforts of student organizations are sorely needed. Governments used the 2008 financial crisis to push through economic policies of austerity, accelerating the decades long transformation of universities into high tuition, profit orientated organizations. Within this new environment, the importance of student organizations to fight for the needs of students directly has increased. In BC, the long reigning BC Liberals

supported tuition freezes for existing programs but also refused to provide increased funding for post-secondary programs. Increased student fees push higher education out of reach for many, and for others it has created an environment where they’re now drowning in debt. In America, student loan debt now exceeds credit card debt. This is the reality of the university’s today in which fraternities operate. Enormous pushbacks against this are necessary by means of sit-ins, debt forgiveness or other means of direct and indirect action. With their memberships largely drawn from the scions of the wealthy and ex members, fraternities have little reason to question a system of which they are the direct beneficiaries - and they haven’t. The inability of Greek Houses to criticize the world they inhabit only serves to further cement their own irrelevancy. Society today is beset by problems, environmental, economic, and social. The Greek societies have either failed to acknowledge these issues, taken the wrong side, or acted like drunks. There is a great need for students to directly engage and respond to pressing issues of our age. The Greek societies appear to exist only as preservers of class society, playing out their lame fantasies, proving that they’re irrelevant. Fraternities will only be relevant if they are progressive and productive in the community, which is to say, exactly which they are not.

Jian G. vs the cbc BELOVED HOST GETS FIRED FOR HIS BEDROOM HABITS Leah Scheitel

THE CAPILANO COURIER.

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× Editor-in-Chief

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Like a bout of explosive diarrhea, Jian Ghomeshi’s separation from the CBC came out of nowhere. It started on Oct. 26, a lazy Sunday, when CBC announced via Twitter that they decided to end their professional relationship with Ghomeshi. “CBC says its relationship with Jian Ghomeshi has come to an end. Decision was made with ‘serious deliberation’ and ‘careful consideration,’” read the Tweet, blasted from the CBC News Alerts account. Immediately, this took over social media, with people showing unwavering support for the beloved host of Q, a popular radio program that airs on weekdays at 10 am. At first, it was unclear as to what the CBC was carefully deliberating about, but it didn’t take long for those details to surface. The CBC decided to part ways with Ghomeshi because of his interest in bondage sex and his kinky bedroom habits. This is where the undying support for an admired public figure becomes dangerous. According to Ghomeshi, the CBC fired him because of his adventurous sex life, something that should be kept private and not be the concern of an employer. As Ghomeshi said, a jaded ex-lover complied evidence against him, and coerced other women to come out with accusations against him. “She found some sympathetic ears by painting herself as a victim and turned this into a campaign,” Ghomeshi wrote in a public statement. He claims he has nothing to hide and has complied evidence to support this claim that he never embarked on erotic role playing that was non-consensual. While he was doing this, his ex-lover was digging into his past relationships and eight women have come out with statements against Ghomeshi saying that he forced sex on them — eight different women, all with different and serious claims. While the methods of how these details came

to light are questionable, and the women responsible may want to check her moral compass, so may the number of supporters blindly standing up for Ghomeshi. He is being accused of assault, which needs to be taken seriously. If there is even the slightest bit of truth to these claims, it’s a big fucking deal. Women are victimized and sexually harassed daily, and according to Sexassult.ca, for every 100 rapes, only 6 get reported. 94 out of every 100 cases don’t get reported for fear of slut shaming, defamation and not being taken as seriously as they should be. If we want to create a culture that is more welcoming for women to speak out against their abusers, thus having a greater chance of decreasing sexual assault, then as a society, we need to take every claim, no matter how complicated, seriously. After Ghomeshi released his public statement on the evening of Oct. 26, explaining his side of the story, fans and supporters were quick to stand by his side, without asking more questions. What we have to remember is that Ghomeshi is educated, well-spoken and adored. He could read us the instruction manual for a new coffee maker and we would be riveted. He’s good at what he does and therefore he can likely talk his way out of sexual assault claims. Twitter has been flooded with tweets supporting Ghomeshi and blaming the CBC for this “mistake.” By the next morning, only 12 hours after going public with his statement, it had received over 99,000 likes and 39,000 shares on Facebook. This compiled with the comments expressing concern, support and praise for telling the truth, one thing is certain: we are quick to judge this situation, and for the most part, we are standing by the man. This is a symptom of our desire for instant news and heavy social media relationship. Before we have facts at all, we are deciding what side of the line we want to be on. But we need to be cautious. The most concerning part is that every like and re-tweet in support of Ghomeshi is sadly a sentiment of slut shaming to

× Sydney Parent the three women who have spoken out against him. Even if they were provoked to speak out by the “jilted” ex-lover, those women must be terrified. This is evidence that coming out about sexual assualt is no easy feat, and showcases our rape culture in Canada. While this opinion may read as a support of his attackers and against Ghomeshi, it’s not. What I am in support of is the facts and truth, neither manipulated nor vengeful. If this was the work of an angry ex trying to frame a

Canadian icon, then yes, absolutely, shame on the CBC and her. However, Ghomeshi is facing severe allegations, and they need to be taken seriously. I’m not saying he’s to blame, as everyone deserves a fair and just trial. I’m saying that he is better with a pen and guiding our opinions in his favour than his accusers are. We have to take that into account as more revelations come to light.


opinions

keep your paws on each other PDA ISN'T GOING ANYWHERE Keara Farnan × Writer In a recent interview, Burnaby mayoral candidate, Sylvia Gung, stated that as part of her platform she would like to promise a ban against public displays of affection (PDA) with a strong emphasis on kissing and hand holding. Gung states banning PDA will most likely benefit the gay and lesbian community, saying in a press conference that, “[PDA] shows the affection between two persons, but it also shows sexuality, and for someone who is strongly against gays and lesbians, they may follow them, and they could be stabbed and shot, and killed.” Unfortunately, Gung is missing the point. According to Global News, Gung has issued her concerns to the school district and they have set to review her proposal at the civic elections on Nov. 15. While kissing may be considered inappropriate in elementary schools, for those in high school hand holding and showing affection should be allowed. Typically, by holding someone's hand or kissing, couples are addressing their admiration for one another and showing support within their relationship. If two people wish to show affection in public or at school, no one should stop them, as it’s not their place to step in. "We understand that we’re not supposed to be kissing or anything in school, which really would be inappropriate, but we think a hug is really OK,” Hana El-Daly, a student in Ontario told the Brampton Guardian. It's the 21st century and people are allowed to do as they please, even if it doesn’t satisfy the public. High schools and elementary schools should think before they

× Megan Collinson ban PDA within their educational institutions and at least imagine themselves in the students' situation. Prohibiting PDA entirely within secondary schools will be damaging to the students, as it will ban people from being able to explore a deeper connection with the one they love. Our teenage years are often the most vulnerable and exploring the world of dating will help bring adolescents closer to mastering the ropes of romance as well as how to behave around a crush

or significant other. It’s extremely unfair to tell couples that are dating that they’re not allowed to show affection in public. For some individuals, talking about their feelings is not any easy task and physically expressing their admiration feels more natural and comforting. Many young and old couples - gay or straight - can be seen roaming around the streets of the North Shore or Downtown Vancouver holding hands and being affectionate towards each other.

Unfortunately, Burnaby and Brampton are not the only cities that are against PDA bans. The Alton Towers Resort amusement park in the UK has been trying to ban PDA since 2008. The park is even armed with “PDA police,” and any people who are caught showing affection will be directed to one of the various PDA drop-off zones where they can safely make out without being scolded by the authorities. Amusement parks are known to be a safe place where families gather to spend time with each other or where young couples go on their first date. Having guards standing by while couples get close with each other must be extremely awkward and frankly, very invasive. No one wants to be told off for kissing their significant other in public. Everyone in the world, male or female wants to experience love at some point in their lives. Even mayoral candidates such as Gung have probably been in love or may be currently in a long-lasting relationship. These individuals must imagine what the public is feeling when they try to pass rules against such actions. PDA is not an obscene or illegal action and it should not be banned. Wanting to make sure that that young elementary school children are aware that kissing is not acceptable is definitely crucial; yet, those who are in high school or are young adults should be allowed to kiss and hold hands it public. After all, the reason why people are in romantic relationships is because they want to explore the idea of being committed to a person. It isn’t fair to ban PDA as it will just cause controversy within our community and bring about many complaints since PDA has been acceptable for many years. PDA is a way for couples to show affection. Those who are offended or made uncomfortable by such displays need to understand that it doesn’t concern them and that banning PDA is not the answer.

Catching Fire TINDER WANTS YOUR MONEY Aidan Moullic × Writer

× Taylor Lee ever they want with their app. The people who are angry that Tinder is no longer going to be 100 per cent free to use will have to deal with it; capitalism is cruel and the sex industry is all about making money. Not the kind of sex industry that gets people thrown in jail, but the Valentine’s Day genre of sex industry, the legal kind. This industry makes a lot of people rich because the chemicals in our brains that make people horny also make them take their wallets out and throw bills around. If Tinder didn’t take money from its users, it would be missing out

on the chance to make a lot of money. Tinder is from America, people don’t say no to opportunities of wealth in America, that’s saying no to the American dream. Costco and drug dealers give out samples. They give people a taste of the sweet nectar that they’re offering, and people will come back and pay for it the next time they want a taste. Tinder has developed a genius product and implemented sound business practices - now it’s time for them to benefit from the world’s never-ending supply of desperate, sex hungry people.

T H E C A P I L A N O C O U R I E R . VOLUME 48 I SSUE N O . 09

There are two things in life that people want more of: sex and money. Like gravity, these two desires are influential forces in this world. Statistics are difficult to come by, but there are dozens of reported cases where people have done stupid things because of sex, money or a combination of both. As technology has improved and as levels of desperation have crept upwards, dating applications and websites have been introduced to meet the demand from horny and lonely people. There is even a dating website for rural singles called FarmersOnly.com. Entrepreneurs have discovered that the key to making money is having a loyal customer base and that rewards are crucial to having a loyal customer base. If the customer thinks they’ll perhaps gain something valuable from your services, they’ll be willing to pay for them. Why do you think that companies are always offering up prize draws? Because it works. As for dating websites, the reward is the possibility of engaging in great sex. One online dating application has risen above the rest and spread like a flame in a poorly ventilated meth lab – Tinder. It’s the crack cocaine of online dating. It’s what you get when you boil down and condense all other dating sites, Tinder is stripped of all the luxuries that sites like OKCupid and eHarmony boast. Tinder offers raw, app based dating. It’s addictive for those who use it; it’s simple, effective and genius. Tinder manages over a billion

visits a day and asks for no money in return – but that’s about to change. The people behind the app that has added another level of complexity to 21st century dating are about to become very rich - and rightfully so. At the recent 30 Under 30 summit in Philadelphia, Tinder cofounder Sean Rad told attendees that Tinder will soon be releasing premium features. For a fee, users will have access to features that will boost their chances of getting laid. Hopefully this deal will include profile picture selection advice and lessons in basic conversation etiquette. In the conversation Rad had while on stage, he spoke about how the premium features that will be released in November will allow Tinder to grow beyond dating. According to Rad, some people use Tinder to seek advice on where to go out for fun in a new city or to share music. According to everyone else in the world, Tinder is for sex and awkwardly being matched with your neighbours. Are online dating websites and applications home to desperate individuals or individuals hoping to maximize their dating efficiency? It’s probably a bit of both. Fortunately for Rad, desperate people and people who are fans of things that are efficient are the types of people who are willing to shell out dollars for results. It would be illogical for Tinder to not introduce a chargebased system. The app has been out for enough time for people to become hooked, now is the time to start taking their money. Users will be mad - who isn’t angry when their dealer ups prices for the goods? But Tinder isn’t an essential service and its creators can do what-

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columns

LEAH SCHEITEL COLUMNS EDITOR

House of common sense BEWARE OF SLATES IN CIVIC VOTE Kevin Kapenda × Columnist

Kevin Kapenda has been the Courier’s unofficial political correspondent for the past two years. This year, we just made it a bit more official. Through his column, he will be delving into the world of politics and highlight what students should pay closer attention to. He’s doing the hard political work so you don’t have to. It’s municipal election season again and candidate signs on curbs are already all over the place. If you are as “curious” as me, you may have also noticed many of the different political brands on each of the signs, like the Non-Partisan Association (NPA), Coalition of Progressive Electors (COPE) or Vision Vancouver. Those affiliations are known as slates, which are in some cases, operated like municipal political parties. Slates are teams of candidates, which may or may not be affiliated with mayoral candidates, who are running for municipal offices such as city council, school board or park board (if your city has one). While these slates may appear to be innocent, they are definitely something to

watch for come voting time, because slates are often used by mayoral candidates to fill council with their preferred folk. While most of Canada’s largest cities like Toronto and Calgary have banned slates, Metro Vancouver has yet to follow suit. Tense relationships between councillors and mayors are not foreign to voters. In Toronto, outgoing mayor Rob Ford had many publicised spats with councillors who felt that he was unfit to lead for various reasons at different times during his term. To prevent this from happening, many mayors throughout the Lower Mainland, including Vancouver’s Gregor Robertson and Burnaby’s Derek Corrigan, are employing slates of vetted council candidates to run alongside them. Even though mayors are elected independently of councillors, the name recognition of many mayoral candidates and their slates, like Robertson’s Vision Vancouver banner, heavily impact who gets elected to council. Since 2002, every winning mayoral candidate in Vancouver has had his slate control city council. Almost all of metro Vancouver’s municipalities have candidate slates. During the 2011 municipal elections, slates especially became a topic of conversation in Surrey, Burnaby and Vancouver, when respective mayors, Dianne Watts, Corrigan and Robertson, were re-elected in their respective cities along with their complete slates of council candidates. Therefore, Watts’ and Corrigan’s

EDITOR@CAPILANOCOURIER.COM

slates controlled all eight seats on the Surrey and Burnaby city councils, while Robertson’s seven city council candidates won all but three of the 10 seats in Vancouver, giving him a “majority” of votes on council. While slates might be controversial, they are also useful in many ways. In Vancouver there are 48 council candidates, vying for 10 seats. With all those names and faces, voters need ways to differentiate the candidates and associate them to broader movements like conservatism, environmentalism, social-democracy or pro-development, and slates allow residents to do just that. In early October, SFU political science professor Patrick Smith told the Tri-Cities Now that municipal slates make choosing candidates easier on voters. “Party labels or slates help [voters] organize their thoughts,” said Smith. While political slates allow for less “red tape” and facilitate law making by mayors, more scrutiny of mayoral policy is what we should demand as residents. Slates are allowing mayors to control the only body or institution that can reign in their “power”: our city councils. Coquitlam mayor Richard Stewart does not like slates, and is unhappy that they are becoming typical in municipal politics. “I lament that our Tri-Cities is heading in that direction,” said Mayor Stewart in the Tri Cities Now. On Oct. 23, City of North Vancouver council candidate Dorothy Bell wrote a commentary in the Georgia Straight entitled “Lamenting the end of the independent candidate in the City of North Vancouver.” She was unhappy that Mayor Darrell Mussatto announced his intention to run a full slate of council

tasha salads ANUS APPRECIATION DAY Tasha Salads × Columnist

THE CAPILANO COURIER.

VOLUME 48 I SSUE N O . 09

Tasha Salads is an expert in all things sexy. She has more used lingerie than all of Leonardo DiCaprio’s ex-girlfriends combined. And she’s here to answer your dirtiest, darkest and raunchiest questions. Tweet @tashasalads to air some dirty laundry. If you're shy, send her a DM and she’ll use a pseudonym to answer your question.

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They say every dog has its day – but is it true? This past week, I got to thinking about the anus and all its glories and I wondered what is so broken about our society that we don't have some kind of national day to celebrate the butthole. In October alone, there is a Virus Appreciation Day, National Mole Day, Bald and Free Day, Curious Events Day, Moment of Frustration Day, Come and Take it Day – although the last three days may in fact target some anal activity. But if even viruses are getting appreciation in the form of their own special day, why not anuses? I hereby proclaim today as National Anus Appreciation Day. You're welcome. @BottomsUp asks: Two of my partners have tried to give me a rim job, and I always deflect it. I don't want some dude sniffing and licking my asshole. Still, I wonder whether I might like it. Duh, you would like it. Remember the first time someone ate your pussy? Before that first lick, you were probably in a tizzy about what it would smell like down there and whether your vagina looked weird. But when that tongue started working it's magic, all your worries faded away, didn't they? It's the same way with rimming. Don't worry about the big shit you took this morning or the awful stank that's always trapped in the cleft between your butt cheeks or

× Chris Dedinsky

that unnatural butt itch that's been lingering for the past few days. If you're curious, you're going to have to trust me on this one: let your guard down and go with it. Anilingus, also known as getting your salad tossed, is one of the most misunderstood sexual undertakings of all time. In 2006, it was famously excluded from Cosmopolitan magazine's Top 26 Tricks to Try Before You Die. But then, who can

trust a magazine that lists "taking a steamy shower together… but with the lights out" as number two on the list? Seriously? Leave the lights on, for fuck’s sakes, this isn't the Middle Ages! But I digress. Where was I? Rim jobs: Statistics from some totally un-credible source suggest that about 15 per cent of North Americans have engaged in some form of anal play, but there is little to no information on the prevalence of rimming.

candidates, bringing an end to a longstanding tradition of independent council candidates in the city. Bell argued that the only reason why Mussatto and his Deputy Councillor Craig Keating are running a slate is too block any opposition to their proposed policies. “The only goal for the current mayor and Team KM is to have a well-oiled and financed team; one unified pro-developer vote. Kick off every dissenting vote or alternate point of view,” she wrote. While Bell’s comments may appear strategic, since she is running for council herself, they support one key point in this piece: that slates allow popular mayors to stack city councils with “screened” individuals that don’t think twice about approving their policies. Municipal slates are contributing to the decrease in municipal engagement across the Lower Mainland because citizens are electing eight to 15 candidates at times (for school and or park board), while only getting to know one of them: that slate’s mayoral candidate. Whether the slate is in North Vancouver, Burnaby, Coquitlam or Surrey, the end result is the same: a mayor with a bunch yes-men or yes-women on our city councils. When you head to the polls on Nov. 15, I encourage you to vote for the city council candidate you feel will best scrutinize the policies put before them by the mayor you feel is best suited to lead your city for the next four years. Seek out independent candidates, read up on the candidates running on slates and watch out for the cronies who are riding on the “buses” of popular mayoral candidates.

Internet sex forums, however, seem to suggest that a lot of people are curious, if not interested. If you're worried that getting a rim job means you have to reciprocate by giving one, don't stress. I don't think The Golden Rule of Oral – suck/lick others as you'd like to be sucked/ licked – applies to salad tossing between heteros. In fact, in straight sexual escapades, the woman is more likely to receive a rim jobs than the man, for several reasons. Firstly, a lot of heterosexual men sort of "stumble upon" the anus while giving cunnilingus. They figure since they're down there anyway, they may as well give it a lick or two before they get back to the vag. Women may also be more likely to have a cleaner butthole that is less obscured by hair. I've heard many a woman express disgust at the thought of licking a man's asshole, even when it's a monogamous partner. Some won't even admit to liking getting their salad tossed – they must not be aware that the asshole is chock full of nerve endings that are just dying for erotic stimulation. For gay guys, all bets are off as to who gives and who gets, although I've heard that tops are more likely to do the licking. @DaintyAnus says: I'm hooking up with this guy who has a donkey dick. I've had anal sex with other guys and I don't want to rule it out, but that schlong is just too big for my dainty butthole. There is a minuscule chance that you've been with small-membered men all your life and this one just looks big. I say get out the lube and go nuts, consensually of course. You never know what your anus is capable of until you try and you really owe it to your butthole to explore its true potential. With that said, is donkey dick someone you trust? He should be willing to go slow and stop completely if you're ever in pain. Dating a donkey dick can come with its fair share of burdens to bear and this is one of them, where communication and lubricant can only go so far. While I hate to say this, you could very well be left empty-butted. Vaginas are meant to stretch – hell, they can open up for fifteen-pound babies. Anuses can stretch for turds, but unfortunately, that's it. Don't try to confuse your rectum by treating it like a vagina, as you could hurt yourself.


columns

YoU haven't seen that?! THE TERMINATOR

Holly Pavlik × Columnist Although Holly Pavlik works in the animation and movie industry, there are an alarming number of blockbuster movies she has yet to see. She is determined to watch them all, and will give you fresh eyes on stories and films the rest of us have all seen. For the record, she hasn’t missed an episode of Arrested Development. She loves Jason Bateman too much for that. Remember Steve from my last article? Of course you do, because you totally read my column every other week — a few times over in fact. Then you tell your friends and family about it. They love it too and it proved to be a great conversation piece during Thanksgiving dinner — you’re welcome. So Steve may or may not have been offended by my refusal to watch his Apocalypse Now recommendation. This week, in an effort to mend a broken Steve heart, I choose to review another one of his top picks: the 1984 over-referenced film, The Terminator. Almost immediately, I’m unsettled when I see Arnold Schwarzenegger’s bare behind within the first 15 minutes. Ever since news broke that he fathered a secret lovechild with his homely maid, I find anything on this man from the waste down incredibly offensive. But I guess who better to play the Terminator than a man who’s mastered the art of terminating things like happy homes and children’s futures? A cyborg assassin from the year 2029, he is programmed to kill a woman named ‘Sarah Connor’ and time-travels to 1984 in order to do so. Unfortunately for us and everyone who worked on set that day, he’s naked when he does it. Crossing paths with a bunch

of hooligans, he steals their clothes and nabs a completely unnecessary pair of biker gloves. I’m now led to believe that this cyborg has also been programmed to have an astute fashion sense. Tres chic, James Cameron, director a la mode. On the flip side, Kyle Reese (Michael Biehn), a human resistance fighter from the year 2029, is sent to 1984 to protect Sarah Connor. After landing from his time-travel flight, he too frolics through the city streets nude until he manages to steal a homeless man’s pants. It’s a struggle for Kyle, but that shit ain’t easy — I would know. Don’t ask. The Terminator roams the city, alphabetically killing all the Sarah Connors he can find in the phone book. After hearing about it on the news, the Sarah Connor (Linda Hamilton) does her ABC’s and pieces together she’s next on the list. When the cyborg tracks her down, Kyle comes to her aid and explains why she’s the Terminator’s target. Things get a little convoluted here, so I’ll simplify the visuals in your head by using the My Little Ponies to break it down: The My Little Ponies have robot insides and living horse tissue outsides. They exist in the near future with a My Little Pony defense network called Skynet — no wait — it’s called Lollipop Yumyum Love Net (LYLN). Eventually this network becomes self-aware and tries to ‘ponify’ the world, thus turning Cherry Jubilee, Pinkie Pie, etc. into human killing machines. Kyle was born after this pony raid and it’s Sarah’s future son John who rallies him and all human pony raid survivors to fight back. When they are on the brink of winning this battle, LYLN sends Twilight Sparkle to 1984 to kill Sarah Connor and obliterate John’s future existence. After seeking refuge in a motel, Kyle admits he’s loved Sarah since receiving a photograph of her from John. Even though this is the 1980’s equivalent of Facebook stalking, Sarah digs it and they fornicate. After sweaty hand-grippinghand close ups reminiscent of Titanic (apparently James Cameron has a thing for fingers), some

too nietzsche GROOM FOR IMPROVEMENT Jeremy Hanlon × Communist

There are few things more satisfying than having luxurious locks billowing forth from your face like the finest silks from a Persian market, and you can quote me on that. There is a quiet dignity a man exudes when he goes about his day-to-day activities and he happens to have an incredibly stylish beard and/or moustache combo; there’s really nothing like it. That said, a properly kept face of hair takes some time to keep healthy and lustrous, and there are some really beneficial things you can do to keep your beard or ‘stache looking its indie folk band best.

Let it grow Ideally you’ll already have a respectable amount of hair on your face, but if not, let me give you a tip: stop shaving your face, at all. If you’re going

× Olliemoonsta for a moustache the first few weeks will have you looking like Pedro Sanchez, and if it’s a beard you want I shouldn’t even have to explain it. Each hair is an artful brush stroke, and every time you shave it’s like trying to erase a Van Gogh. Hands off the masterpieces, please. Letting the whole beard grow in together allows you to go through the awkward post-stud stubble and pre-hunk period looking like a common slob instead of a registered sex offender, so silver linings and all. Now unless you’ve been chugging badger milk since the age of seven, chances are it’ll take you at least a few weeks before you have anything that could resemble charming, and perhaps a lot more if you’re going for a specific style. Around then, however, you should have something that can be groomed and preened into something of beatific beauty. Let me tell you what you might want to do for your morning face-forest ritual.

action packed hoopla happens. Following said hoopla, the Terminator is seemingly terminated when Kyle manages to put a bomb into the cyborg’s abdomen, blowing him up from the inside out. A spicy burrito probably would have done the same thing, but I guess this is more exciting. The explosion kills Kyle, and just when you think the movie’s over, the Terminator’s torso suddenly attacks. It’s as surprising as Arnold’s governor win, but Sarah manages to crush it with a hydraulic press so it’s all good. `We fast forward a few months to a pregnant Sarah. Traveling through Mexico (as you do when you’re expecting) she’s stopped at a gas station and gets her photo taken by a young entrepreneurial Mexican child. It turns out to be the same picture John had given Kyle in the

future. So like, Kyle is John’s dad and it’s this huge time-travel cycle thing where you don’t know which came first, the sex or the war, and if you keep thinking about it you get bored and go watch the Bachelor Canada. In conclusion, this movie teaches us that clothes are incapable of time-travel. So, I’ll be sure to do plenty of squats in case I meet a babe after teleporting through the dimensions of time to 1969’s Woodstock. I’ve also personally learned to trust my gut when it comes to Steve’s recommendations. At the risk of losing friendships, I have to say this movie just isn’t my jam. But if there’s one thing I can take away from the 107 minutes I lost, it’s the gloriousness of this: Youtube.com/watch?v=AuUqpZgHiEE. It’s worth manually typing into your browser. Trust me.

Use beard oil

• Stir, and add any essential oils you like for a desired scent. The plain wax has a fairly sweet smell, not unlike honey. • Pour the freshly made wax into a receptacle of some kind and chill it in the fridge for about half an hour. (I tend to use ceramic ramekins for mine, as unlike glass, they’re less likely to crack from high heat.) • Want it to hold better and be dryer? Use more beeswax. Want it more pliable and easy to work with? Throw in extra jelly. Wax made! One could also prepare the wax in a microwave, but I wouldn’t recommend it after experiencing firsthand how difficult it is to try and clean an explosion of Vaseline and beeswax from the inside of a microwave. Depending on how it came out and on how warm the weather is, you might need to heat up the wax to make it workable. This can be done with a hair dryer, or even by rubbing a small amount of wax between two fingers until it’s soft. Then you just work it evenly into your moustache and style away. To aid in this, you could also use a moustache comb to get rid of clumps of wax in the ‘stache. (No joke, this is a real thing, and has saved me a few times.) Try this, and you’ll be the hippest kid at the November beard pageant. There’s really nothing quite as legitimate as telling your friends that your three-pronged handlebar moustache was styled from home-brewed patchouli-scented wax, and that you use only the finest Hungarian beard oils. Or was that annoying? Regardless, stay tuned for the next column when I teach you how to get rid of that godawful beard using only a tube, a brush, and a knife.

Beard oil is exactly what it sounds like: oil for your beard. After your shower, beard oil is great for giving your facial foliage a lustrous shimmer, and making it soft as a newborn bunny rabbit’s stomach fur. On top of that, it smells great. Most producers of beard oil will use essential oils of various plants, usually in combination to produce a pleasing aroma, along with a base for the desired effect of the oil, which is to provide nutrients and moisture to the beard hair, keeping it supple and smooth. Think of it like a conditioner for your face. Common ingredients are jojoba, coconut or grapeseed oils as bases, with scents being provided by aromatic additions like sandalwood, pine and citrus. There are also specialized oils made to address issues like dry skin and acne, so for any majorly bearded man facing harsh climates, this oil is a must.

Wax that ‘stache If you want your moustache to do some crazy Dali-esque acrobatics, it’s pretty imperative you give it a little support in the way of moustache wax. There are many manufacturers of moustache wax, from whom one can purchase small containers of wax online, but I prefer to use homemade wax, which is frightfully easy to make, if a bit cleaning intensive. The steps to making moustache wax are: • Get a small junky pot and wooden spoon you don’t mind never using again. The wax is ridiculously difficult to clean out otherwise. • Put beeswax and petroleum jelly (or coconut oil if you find putting solidified mineral oil in your hair weird) into the pot at a ratio of about 1:1, and melt them together on low heat.

T H E C A P I L A N O C O U R I E R . VOLUME 48 I SSUE N O . 09

Jeremy Hanlon is a mastermind in all things off the beaten path. Some of his interests include instant music trivia, moustache cultivation and wheeling around the office on a swivel chair. With his column, he will explore the world of the niche, and why underground communities are often the most welcoming.

× Cristian Fowlie

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CAp you

CARLO JAVIER LIFESTYLE EDITOR

CARLO.CAPCOURIER@GMAIL.COM

giving the assist SPORTGRO HELPS KIDS PLAY HOCKEY Sports are near essential to the childhood of many Canadians. However, the costs of equipment and yearly fees are not exactly affordable to every family. In order to assist, several students from Capilano University have utilized a school project to create a fundraiser that’s focused on getting kids the funds to play the sport they love the most, hockey. “[SportGro] is a non profit organization,” says Dylan Hughes, one of the student organizers of the group, “What we’re doing is raising money for another charity called Athletics for Kids (A4K) and what they do is they raise money for kids who are underprivileged and can’t afford sport grants into the desired sport they want to play. As part of the curriculum of Leadership, a 300-level business class, students work with an external organization and bring their respective goals to CapU, “The project is to go out to the community and make a difference,” says Anna Nassinovskaia, a third year business student in the

SportGro team, “This is what we chose to do, we chose to help kids in sports, we want to help those who can’t afford it.” SportGro aims to raise $5,000 and are looking to send roughly about four kids to play hockey. One of their incentives for donations are tickets to several sports games in the city, including the Canucks. “We’re going to be selling raffle tickets, and you can win club seats to the Canucks, and also Giants tickets,” explains Nassinovskaia. The SportsGro team will be in the Birch Cafeteria on Nov. 18 to sell raffle tickets. The team has also worked with the Capilano Blues squads by having a booth at one of the recent exhibitions. “We went to the volleyball games and we’re visiting the local high schools in the North Shore, although we can’t really sell tickets as they’re under 18,” says Hughes. Despite the focus towards hockey, neither SportGro nor A4K are exclusive to the sport. Any athletic practice that a child so wishes to play is available

through A4K’s grants program. “What happens is families apply for A4K to see if they’re eligible to receive the grants,” says Hughes, “It could be for basketball, for football, whichever sport they so they desire, but the majority of it is hockey because its probably the most expensive.” As a school project, SportGro has a finite timeline. However, if the events go well, the team would like to see the organization grow. They’ve already received interest from the North Vancouver Recreation and Culture commission about helping out in some of the games this coming winter and spring. It started with humble beginnings — the group simply wanted to differentiate themselves from other students in the Leadership course — and what they ended up with is a little organization that can grow and make a difference. “Other groups in the classroom are helping out soup kitchens, or they’re helping senior citizens; we narrowed it down between helping out kids and us liking sports,” says Hughes.

Here's our boy Robert. He'll hook you up with some chicken fingers, some sausages and some fries. Most importantly he'll hook you up with some Jordans. And based on the looks of his mask he likes hockey.

a new partnership CAPILANO UNIVERSITY JOINS WE DAY

THE CAPILANO COURIER.

VOLUME 48 I SSUE N O . 09

As a new partner to We Day, students and faculty of Capilano University have their imprints throughout the Vancouver iteration of the annual gathering. The partnership between the school and the popular youth empowering event organized by Free the Children initially began as a personal connection between CapU President Kris Bulcroft and Marc Kielburger, co-founder of Free the Children. “That’s kind of what got us into it, it was just a personal contact with Mark, and my connecting the dots that CapU is the kind of place that really prepares change makers and we bring a lot of change makers to campus here, so it’s a really good fit for We Day and for us,” explains Bulcroft. Prior to CapU’s involvement, no other post secondary institution in BC had a direct relationship with We Day. Last year marked the first official partnership with CapU and the annual event, where Bulcroft, along with business student Daniel DuBois faced an audience of 20,000 in Rogers Arena, “I just felt that this is absolutely the right thing for CapU to do, because so many of our students are change makers and really engaged in our world and that’s the kind of education that I think is really the brand for CapU.”

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This year, more CapU students were invited to participate in the event’s festivities. Students from the musical theatre program put together the opening act for Jennifer Lopez, performing “You Can’t Stop the Beat” from the musical Hairspray. Standing out among the ensemble was third year musical theatre student Kaitlyn Yott, who was selected to speak on her inspiring story about overcoming being placed in the spectrum of autism as a child. “We had a great time, I thought it was an excellent representation of CapU, and it was the most amazing experience,” says Elaine Bevans, a second year musical theatre student, and part of the performance ensemble at We Day. CapU’s increasing involvement with We Day can be attributed to the university’s changing culture. Bulcroft comments that campus engagement has been in a transition in the past few years. Students are more active in events that boost community, and students have also been more inclined to be change makers in their respective fields. The presence of the university in We Day also stands as a benefit to CapU’s promotional work. Traditionally, post-secondary institutions advertise themselves by plastering their names and logos on

advertorials in bus stops or a newspaper. However, Bulcroft sees a change coming, “I think the future for universities is through sponsorship and through partnerships,” she says, “We Day is the perfect way to tell 20,000 young people from BC sitting in that audience that CapU is the kind of university where you do have the opportunity to get engaged and to continue to make a difference.” Also changing is We Day itself. The event, known for promoting youth empowerment and the mission of Free the Children, has noticeably been changing the course of its program. This year’s iteration of We Day Vancouver was heavy on celebrities. Orlando Bloom, Macklemore and Ryan Lewis, and Selena Gomez were among the most heavily advertised celebrities for the event. It even included a rather provocative performance by Jennifer Lopez. “She was fierce, and She was absolutely brilliant! Appropriate for 12 year olds? Maybe not,” describes Bevans. On the other hand, Jenn Lynch, another member of CapU’s musical ensemble comments on the balance she noticed from the event, “I thought it was really inspirational as well, I didn’t really notice that they were trying to put on a show, I mean it is televised so there does have to be an entertainment aspect.”

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Madison Dunstall is a third year Global Stewardship student. This year’s We Day marks her fourth straight year of participation. As a photographer, Dunstall has had her fair share of experiences in We Days of past, and this year, the change is obvious to her. “This We Day was really geared towards talent, and I think that’s really what provoked the youth to come to this We Day, not so much the inspirational speakers, but more of the celebrities like Selena Gomez, Nick Jonas, those are all celebrities that really appeal to young people,” says Dunstall, “I think it has gradually gone up into focusing more on talent, it’s really declined in guests that have actually made a positive difference in the world.” Despite the obvious move towards a more “entertaining” culture, Bulcroft does believe that the transition, ultimately is based on We Day’s organizers, and audience – both primarily composed of young people. “One thing that always strikes me when I work with the people who organize We Day, is that its getting bigger and bigger and their staff is has gotten larger and larger – but they’re all really young people,” says Bulcroft, “The organizers who are young people, if they feel that’s what this generation needs and wants, I guess they’re going to try it and see.”


caboose

CARLO JAVIER LIFESTYLE EDITOR

CABOOSE@CAPILANOCOURIER.COM

class in session A MISGUIDED GUIDE TO PICKING UP THAT CUTE BARISTA I’m not a coffee snob. My choices are based simply on convenience and price. However, for the past two or so weeks, I’ve been taking more than usual trips to the Starbucks right outside Gilmore station, where a coffee-making, heart-stealing barista takes orders. She asked for my name but I refuse to believe it was because she needed to write it on my cup. Now here becomes the issue. For my entire university life, I’ve only been able to pick up articles, things that my boss Leah throws at me, and other writers’ sloppy seconds. I’ve not been able to pick up my grades, or anyone from this group of people called “girls.” With that in mind, I’ve asked my Capilano Courier brethren for tips, tricks and things to watch out for when attempting to pick up, or at least get digits. If you’re an avid reader, and you’re probably not, you should know that the Editor-in-Chief and the Features Editor of this publication are experts at this game. Here’s what everyone had to say:

Take It Seriously Remember, picking up a barista doesn’t happen on your first visit. This is going to require persistence and no small amount of pocket change on your part. Start small. Most of the time baristas will treat new customers professionally. They’ll take your order, make your drink, smile and wish you a good day, so don’t expect them to write their number on your cup on your first visit, it won’t happen. However, during that process there’s an opportunity for small talk. Little things like asking how work is going, or how their weekend was will go a long way. If it’s a coffee shop without uniforms then compliment something they’re wearing, and when your drink comes, leave. Don’t be the creepy person who lingers around looking to talk while they make people’s drinks. Eventually you’ll show up during a slow time where either there are no customers, all their work is done, or their boss isn’t around. This is where you can make some serious progress and hang around longer. That quick chat about their weekend can turn into a full conversation and unless you’re conversationally handicapped, you’ll have a chance to ask them out or at least get their phone number. - Gabriel Scorgie, Opinions Editor

Keep It Cool When you’re looking to bed a barista, I suggest you start brushing up on coffee lingo. Practice your order in front of the mirror and watch the way your lips mouth the words, so by the time you’re ready to go live, the words flow out with the same ease as the communal creamer. No need to let their babely looks trip you up. It’s cute to order your coffee with your own vernacular, say “cup of jo” or casually drop that you need your “wakey juice”. Baristas slave all day to the sound of robotic orders so give them something to pause and process. Plus, as a former slave to customer service, saying “How is your day going,” accompanied by intense eye contact is a sure fire way to ignite a spark. I generally would recommend applying winged eyeliner and a heavy dose of mascara and batting your lashes like an epileptic butterfly. Everyone knows what that means. Yet, the best advice may seem the most obvious – tell that hot barista that you think they look great in that green apron, and offer your digits on a cute post-it and a date that does not, in any way, involve coffee. - Faye Alexander, Features Editor

Understand the Complexities of a Library The barista can be a tough one. Chances are, she's slightly buzzed on some fresh roasted beans and has already been hit on multiple times, which may make her a bit of a wild card. Then again, maybe she's not. Because if there is one thing I’ve learned, it is to never be too sure. There was a time when I sparked a conversation with a barista. I asked her if she would rent out a book for me on her university library card. It took some convincing but she agreed. I got her number and left with a coffee in hand. We arranged a time and made the trade-up at her campus. It was months later when I got a call from the barista reminding me to return the book, which is great. Cause wasn't the goal to get her number? And now she's calling you. - Andrew Palmquist, Production Manager

Don't Do It For The Vine

Get Straight to the Point Make sure they are cute. Like really cute, not just Ryan Gosling cute. And then you make repeated trips to their coffee shop, but only when they are working. If they’re not working, you turn your sweet ass around and wait until their shift starts. It looks a little creepy, but that’s what it takes to stand out. This is also a long process, and you will spend all of your disposable income on caffeine, which will make you jittery and tense for a while, but you will get used to it. Seriously, this is what it takes to bag a barista. Then you see him out at a bar drinking, walk up to him and say, “We’re going to fuck and we are not going to care,” and do things that your mother wouldn’t be proud of. After, you write a sex column about it, which strokes his ego and makes him fall in love with you. And you get free JJ Bean for a year in exchange for blowjobs. Win-win really. - Anna L. Beedes, You Remember Her

Don't be a Dweeb As someone who is already dating a barista — hey-o, big success story right here — I get a daily earful about all the dweebs that try to hit on her at work. It seems like there’s a lot of them, and despite the whole concept of strength in numbers, you probably don’t want to join their ranks. For the past couple months she’s had this one turbo-dweeb that always brings her food — like we’re talking the kind of home-cooked meals that require multiple utensils and formal serving ware! Messy stuff. The dude also knows her work schedule better than I do, which is like a ticking time bomb for me getting yelled at sometime very soon. And he brings her candy almost every day. One time he vanished for a week, which she said was literally the best thing to happen to her all year, but then he came back from Vegas with a knockoff designer wallet engraved with her name. After she refused this offering and once again brought up the fact that I might actually be a real person, he continued to hover longingly at the counter for the rest of her seven-hour shift. So how do you avoid being a dweeb? Just do the opposite of what he does, which is ironically what most people do once they’ve gotten the girl — don’t ask her about her life, don’t pay attention to her work schedule and don’t ever surprise her with gifts of food or clothing. Bam. You're set. - Andy Rice, Managing Editor

Listen To Des'ree I can either go the humorous route or give logical advice derived from my Virgo-ish opinion. It's easy for me to begin something sarcastic that will never help my little Carlo get the girl. To be honest - I'm not much of a picker-upper but I do know that being bold and direct beats a clever pick up line. Here are ten point form tips that you can use to your advantage - even in every-day life. It's all in a personality. Even though for some it is all in superficiality - unfortunately. 1. Be confident (not cocky) 2. Be friendly (not overly friendly) 3. Be cool (not try hard) 4. Be genuine (not dubious) 5. Be friendly (not stale) 6. Be real (not fake) 7. Be playful (but not cheesy) 8. Be open (obviously not closed) 9. Be observant (Not oblivious) 10. Be you (not that other guy) Basically, follow Des'ree's advice from her song "You gotta be" : "...You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together All I know, all I know, love will save the day ..." - Cheryl Swan, Art Director

T H E C A P I L A N O C O U R I E R . VOLUME 48 I SSUE N O . 09

Being part of the service industry, it’s hard to be polite and have to deal with guys you don’t want hitting on you. If she’s avoiding eye contact and giving you one-word answers when you’re trying to converse with her, I promise you she’s not playing hard to get. Take a hint, and probably don’t ask her if you can take her for a ride on your motorcycle. However, there are some guys who come in that I do wish would speak up. Personally, I melt if a guy has a charming smile. Start with a smile and make sure you make eye contact. Not so much that it comes off as creepy (remember to blink, some guys manage to turn that flirty glance into some sort of a staring contest) or like you have a shit-ton of Vaseline on your teeth. If she smiles back that’s a good start. If you catch her glancing at you a little more than she needs to, she probably thinks you’re cute (or funny looking – sorry, girls are complicated like that). Compliment her, be straight-up and ask her if she’d be interested in giving you her number. If all else fails, run and yell “Do it for the Vine!” and hope that you never run into her again. - Alva Tee, Arts + Culture Editor

× Katie So

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shotgun reviews WORST OR FAVOURITE BAR

THE BOURBON

LOTUS

SEYMOUR'S

TAP & BARREL

I thought that growing up in Vancouver would prepare me for any amount of flannel I could ever be exposed to. I realize now that some people have what many would consider an unhealthy obsession with flannel. I also realize that every one of these flannel fanatics can be found day in, day out, at the Bourbon. Walking into the Bourbon, I wasn’t expecting every man, woman, and creepy old perv to be dressed head to toe in crappy thrift shop outfits, topped off with a horrible cowboy hat. Boy, was I wrong. It felt like every person in that place was somehow related, because they all had similar clothes, all looked just about the same, and all knew every word to every shitty country song I had to pretend to enjoy. Don’t even get me started on dancing to country. But hey, it wasn’t all bad. You get to go on the sweet mechanical bull as many times as you want, which, if you’re drinking right, is one time. And believe me, one time is enough. The amount of uncomfortable chafing that I had to endure was unbelievable. All in all, the Bourbon was an unforgettable experience. One that I’d love to forget.

When most think about their worst bar experiences, they think of some dive bar of a slum that exists in small towns. To these people I say you are incorrect. The worst bar that I have had the privilege to be acquainted with would be Lotus Nightclub in Red Deer, Alberta. Lotus is a hotspot for those on both sides of the legal drinking age from across Red Deer, especially local college students. The bar itself had a mandatory coat check at the time to combat stabbings that occurred on the premises. The dance floor was packed with sweaty grinding and humping action, the music was top 40, played at a level where it can cause hearing damage, and the cover charge was implemented almost every night, not just for special events. It had been a long time between my last visit, however this summer following promises of change from my friends I discovered they are deceitful jerks. Lotus was the same as it had always been, a seedy nightclub with sticky floors 24 hours a day in a small Albertan city. Oh yeah and don’t forget the stabbings. Seriously, it’s almost tradition. The shootings are less so.

If you’re literally the only pub within walking distance of a university, and yet somehow, unpopular with the student population, you clearly are doing something very wrong. It’s actually an impressively difficult feat to accomplish, when you think about it. My “favourite” memory is probably the time my friends and I went out after class to enjoy a mid-week evening of drinks and conversation in the combination gastropub/sports bar ambiance they try so hard to cultivate. Perplexingly, at some point in the night the pub decided to throw their identity out the window and suddenly try becoming a dance club too. Regular lighting was replaced with strobes and dancing colours, and blaring dance music made conversation impossible. That’s fine if you’re that kind of bar, but there are only so many hats you can try to wear simultaneously. Nobody was dancing, largely because the bar was empty except for our large group. We asked if perhaps the music volume could be lowered so we could continue our conversation over more food and drinks. The staff’s response was: “No, this is what happens here.” So we left them to enjoy their empty gastro-sports-dance party. What a joke.

If you're looking to have a fun night out with your friends, come to Tap & Barrel either at Coal Harbour or the Olympic Village. With a variety of menu items and a killer wine menu, you and your girls, or boys, can enjoy a nice bottle of Merlot or Rose. If it's your birthday, you ought to tell the servers so you can get a free shot of Jäger, which is always a good start to getting turnt. The old couple sitting across the street will be highly entertained as your friends chant: "Drink, drink, drink!" and you're trying your best not to spill or puke your brains out. Bring your cake and they will serve it to you on a silver platter and top it with candles. The people who work at Tap & Barrel are trained in serving wine and hosting parties until 1:00 am. For all the single lads and ladies out there head down to Tap & Barrel — you just might meet that special someone, and maybe they'll even buy you a drink. Seriously, the only way you can make your night at Tap & Barrel even better is by hitting up a club right after. Remember to say hi to Cheryl!

Tristen Schmidhauser // Writer

the hot ChArt

THE CAPILANO COURIER.

VOLUME 48 I SSUE N O . 09

BY

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AVAILABLE CARLO & SINGLE FAYE

Scott Barkemeyer // Writer

James Martin // Writer

Keara Farnan // Writer

YOUR SOULMATE // JUST A SWIPE AWAY

IT’S A MATCH! // TRANSLATION: IT’S A DOUCHE

TINDER // HIGHLY FLAMMABLE

PLENTY OF FISH // PROOF THE SAYING IS INVALID

VIRGINS WITH MORALS // CHRISTIAN MINGLE

FIRST DAY OF CLASS // LIKE TINDER IN PERSON

BLIND DATES // MUST LOVE DOGS

WORST TYPE OF STD YOU’LL GET ON TINDER // FEELINGS

SINGLE BY CHOICE // JUST NOT YOUR CHOICE

SNAPCHAT // FUCKING SNAP ME BACK!

MY HOMELESS BOYFRIEND // ALWAYS SPENDS THE NIGHT

IN A RELATIONSHIP ON FACEBOOK // LOSERS

THE HOTTEST GUY I SLEPT WITH // HAD A FEVER

MY MOVIES // SOLID COMPANY


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