CommUNITY Magazine (vol 2 iss 1) DIVERSITY

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The Pride Center

Honorary Chair

of the Capital Region

Alan Bennett I l ag a n

Cordially invite you to join us and dress to impress!

S at u r d ay

February 8, 2014 At T h e S t at e R o o m , 142 State Street, Albany NY, For The

THE funky formal, gender bender, high fashion event of the season! Eat! Drink! Dance! And be Merry!

Hors D’oeuvres

6:00 pm to 7:00 pm VIP Reception

Complimentary Virgin Drink Bar

7:00 pm to 10:00 pm Gay Soiree!

Cash Bar

1930’s Cabaret Music by Sonny & Perley Dance Music by DJ Robb Penders sponsored by:

Soiree Ticket: $45.00, VIP Ticket: $75.00 (VIP ticket includes 6 PM admission and complimentary wine during VIP Reception)

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Purchase tickets online at www.capitalpridecenter.org or by calling the Pride Center at 518.462.6138.


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Message from the President

The Holidays have now passed and we are all back into our routines (hopefully). A New Year has begun. The Pride Center is busy with many activities. We have seen two Board Members retire

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Ken M o r t ens en

after serving the Center well. Please congratulate Veronica Mangione and Ulysses DeArmas for serving on our Board. Ulysses was Pride Chair for several years, he also served as Chair of Governance, and headed up our Scholarship program. Ronnie has served on the Development Committee, and will continue in this position. Please welcome our newest Board Members: Patrice Regan, and Gretchel Hathaway. They will begin their term on February 1st. I look forward to working with them. The theme of this month’s CommUNITY is Diversity. We are a very diverse community. I am constantly on a learning curve. My life experiences have

D i r e c to r ’ s N ot e

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On the bigger landscape, we have an incredible slate of elected officials in the Capital Region. With the amount of gay politicians and allies filling Common Council and Town Board seats, Mayoral positions as well as in state and feder-

F r o m T h e E d i to r ’ s D e s k

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al positions, I am truly looking forward to the year ahead. I was beyond exciting to witness Judge Margaret Walsh swear in Mayor Sheehan in Albany, and it is also particularly exciting to see the appointment of Hawk Stone to Schenectady’s Human Rights Commission as the first openly transgender Commissioner in New York State! While the road to equality is still far off for some in our community, we are certainly traveling in the right direction at greater speeds than ever before. With your dedication and support, I know we will be leaving 2014 better than when we entered. Happy 2014! Hope to celebrate with you at the Gay Soiree- just a week away!

M i c hael Wei dr i c h,

features, more spotlights, more color, and a fresh new face. 2013 delivered 10 fantastic issues, highlighting the great work of the Pride Center and the great people of Capital Region. And we have even bigger plans for 2014 with exciting new themes every issue, insightful new lead articles, welcoming new columnists, and broadening the voices we highlight in CommUNITY every month.

Last February, we took what was historically a newspaper format newsletter and overhauled CommUNITY into a brand new magazine with more

I hope that you will join us at the Center, and take advantage of our many offerings. You never know who you will meet. Maybe I will see you at the February Pride Center Business Alliance LGBT Professionals Mixer, or at an end of the month Sunday Supper? On February 10th, we will be at Northeastern Fine Jewelry on Western Ave in Guilderland for the mixer. February’s Supper Sunday is February 23rd with Mike Chapman and his group, who put on a fantastic meal..

Cur r an St r eet t , E x e c u t i v e D i r e c t o r

Here at the Pride Center, we have doubled our staff in the past year, and are out and about more than ever providing both direct and basic services as well as creating fun social events like none other in the Capital Region. With an incredible board and a strategic plan to guide us, the Pride Center is gearing up for our best year yet. Want to know more? Sign up for our newsletter, attend a board meeting or set up a time for coffee and I will fill you in on our big plans ahead. As we dig our snow boots in to the New Year (begrudgingly in my case!) there is a lot to look forward to in 2014. What an exciting time, both for the Pride Center and the Capital Region!

taken me to different places. Growing up in the 1960’s and 70’s has shaped my perspectives. Today the ability to “reach for the stars” is available to many more people. The future is getting brighter.

Recently, the Pride Center Board and Staff took part in a retreat to put into words our organizational philosophy on Diversity. What came out of that day was not just a Diversity Statement, but a renewed commitment to the well-being

c o m m UNITY

Editor

of the LGBTQ community. The Pride Center commits to representing the racial and cultural diversity of the region; being intentional in our efforts to recruit diverse Board members, staff and volunteers; and cultivating a collaborative environment where all feel included, respected and valued. To mark this commitment, we dedicate this issue of CommUNITY to Diversity with the fantastic words of Dr. Robert Miller Jr. and our partners at In Our Own Voices. I close with a saying that I’ve held dear for much my life from Star Trek of all places- IDIC- Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations.

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Community Partner Spotlight- In Our Own Voices: an Interview with Nigel weatherspoon, ioov director of operations

The Pride Center of the Capital Region has many partner organizations it works with throughout the region. One of the most important partners is In Our Own Voices. As the preeminent authority on LGBT people of color in the Capital Region, the Pride Center frequently collaborates with IOOV on diversity and inclusion in our programs. Last year, the two organizations held a joint panel discussion on Racism Under the Rainbow We recently sat down for a conversation with Nigel Weatherspoon, the newly appointed Director of Operations for In Our Own Voices (IOOV), to discuss the organization more in-depth. Since Nigel is new to the organization, and to the Capital Region, we also wanted to take an opportunity for us and our readers to become better acquainted with him. Hi Nigel, thanks so much for taking the time to talk with us today. Can you start by telling us a bit about your background? No problem. I completed a Bachelor of Arts degree in Communications Management at Miles College in Fairfield, Alabama and obtained a Master of Business Administration degree from Virginia College. I initially got into working for nonprofit organizations in 2001 as an Area Research Coordinator for the Birmingham 601 Project which, at the time, was collecting data from Black men who have sex with men in Jefferson County (Alabama). I later picked up working in HIV Prevention Education at AIDS Alabama where I served as the Director of Education before deciding to move to North Carolina with my Partner. How did you wind up in the Capital Region and as the Director of Operations at IOOV? I had accepted a position with United Healthcare working with their nonprofit affiliations in Greensboro, NC when I came across the work of In Our Own Voices. I have always had an affinity for New York so when the opportunity presented itself I had a lengthy discussion with my partner who supports my moving to Albany.

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IOOV’s Executive Director, Tandra LaGrone, members of the board of directors and executive staff members paired my experience, education and skill set with the needs of IOOV and the clients we served and felt strongly that IOOV would benefit by placing me in the position of Director of Operations. What are some of the primary challenges you face as one of the people running an organization such as IOOV? Being that I am not a native of Albany, NY a large part of my challenges come from having to learn the “lay of the land” as it relates to the community here in Albany and surrounding areas. I have hit the ground hard networking and studying up on those organizations and companies that fuel the services we provide to the LGBT people of color communities. Of course, with any new position there is the process of learning the organization’s culture, duties of the position and everyone adjusting to “the new guy”. Any transitional difficulties aside, what do you find to be the most rewarding aspect of the job? The most rewarding part of the work has to be the impact we make on the communities we serve. Although very new, I have seen first-hand the importance of the services IOOV provides. Whether it be helping someone locate shelter through our domestic violence hotline or serving over 217 families with our 2013 Toys for Tots program - - it is clear to me that IOOV is very needed. I relish in knowing each day I go to work I am serving my community. That is a reward in and of itself. For those who may not know, IOOV are basically neighbors with the Pride Center. Can you expand a bit on IOOV’s relationship with the Center and how the two organizations work in congruence for the Capital Region LGBT community? In the short period of time I have been in this role, I have witnessed Curran (Streett, Executive Director of the Pride Center) and Tandra working seamlessly together

on a few projects. It is my firm belief that the existence of the Pride Center and In Our Own Voices is very necessary. I can see the need in our community and I support the fact that both organizations provide very specific and tailored services which impact the LGBT community here in the Capital Region in a very comprehensive and distinct manner. I believe focusing on serving the LGBT community is much larger than placing any focus on any one specific organization. I have faith that both Tandra and Curran feel the same. You’re new to the area, but in the time you’ve been here so far, what do you see as the biggest sign of progress in the Capital Region LGBT community, whether in the LGBT POC community or just in general? I was invited to the YMCA early January to participate in a speed networking event designed for their staff to interact with LGBT serving organizations. Organizations such as In Our Own Voices and the Pride Center have really been pushing the LGBT community’s agenda along otherwise, organizations such as the YMCA would not be interested in learning more ways to be inclusive. The clients we serve speak constantly about how services have positively impacted their lives and the lives of those they have to participate as well. Needless to say, our nation is moving closer towards being more affirming and inclusive and it is my belief that the LGBT organizations across the spectrum are to be credited for the change in the climate for LGBT people in general. In contrast, what’s an issue you feel still needs a lot of work in the LGBT community? If I had to identify an issue plaguing the LGBT community it would have to be our lack of drive to empower one another. Whether it be traditional religion, the healthcare system or our legal practices, we as LGBT people have enough stacked against us. America is shifting to a more inclusive and affirming view of LGBT people. We need to take heed to this, empower one another and help build our communities to be as “fabulous” as we all are.


combat multiple forms of oppression that impact the lives of LGBT communities of color and it is done so in our own voices.

What are some the ways which the AntiViolence Project is trying to address these community specific issues?

How far of a geographic reach does IOOV? Do they serve the entire Capital Region?

The LGBT Anti-Violence Project attends monthly domestic violence and sexual assault coalition meetings to address gaps and services that serve as barriers for LGBT POC crime victims. During these community meetings, we actively bring up the issues mentioned above and how to appropriately address them. Some of the reoccurring issues that we are seeing in the program are victim discussions around dismissal when accessing services or not being treated respectfully while accessing services because of their sexual orientation and/or gender identity.

IOOV does indeed serve the entire Capital Region and seven (7) surrounding counties: Albany, Rensselaer, Columbia, Saratoga, Montgomery, Schenectady and Greene. Looking at IOOV’s website, one of the biggest components of the organization seems to be the LGBT Anti-Violence Project. Can we hear some more details on that program? The LGBT Anti-Violence Project works towards assisting crime victims, with a specific focus on LGBT people of color, by providing an array of services. However, it is important to note that we work with anyone who is need of services identifies as a victim of a crime.

IOOV’s History & Mission So what’s the “elevator speech” overview of In Our Own Voices mission? Well it is the mission of In Our Own Voices, Inc., to work for and ensure the physical, mental, spiritual, political, cultural and economic survival and growth of the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender people of color (LGBT POC) communities. IOOV initially began as a few separate social action groups, correct? In Our Own Voices grew out of the concerns of social justice activists and LGBT POC community members that the voices, issues, and disparities faced by LGBT POC were not being addressed or seen as valid by mainstream society/ organizers. These groups (Feminist Action Network, Sisters and Brothers in the Life, and the Gay Men of Color Alliance) and individuals were determined to create a safe space for the voices of LGBT POC to be heard and developed a plan of action to strengthen the voices of LGBT POC, develop leadership among LGBT POC, and increase the capacity for LGBT POC to combat oppression and marginalization. Through education, advocacy, community organization, and social/support opportunities In Our Own Voices has created a culturally specific resource to

Some of these services include, but are not limited to: emergency assistance, referrals to local LGBT-friendly agencies, supportive counseling, advocating for crime victim rights, crime victim claims assistance, managing a domestic violence support line, legal assistance referrals, providing crisis intervention and bilingual services In addition to the direct service portion of the program, the LGBT Anti-Violence Project also works on the community level to advocate for LGBT people of color crime victim’s rights. What are some of the unique issues and barriers that may be faced by LGBT POC? Some of the barriers LGBT POC victims face are: a) Not being able to access shelter due to their gender identity/sex b) Being discriminated against because of their sexual orientation/gender identity c) Fear of being ostracized or sexual orientation being made public d) Providers not being culturally aware of the many identities a victim encompasses, e) Policies not encompassing LGBT communities f) Language on forms and outreach material not being inclusive.

Another example of the community work we are doing is partnering with the Albany Police Department and local community organizations to create more inclusive policies for the transgender community and also providing supplemental training for these entities. As we continue to do this work, it is evident there is a need for culturally specific programs to address and advocate on the barriers our community faces, to ensure quality and access to necessary services. Continuously offering trainings to local community agencies to address these issues has proven to be very effective and needed. Short of being employed there, what are some of the most effective ways our readers can become involved with IOOV? We strongly encourage your readers to become a member of In Our Own Voices. This can be done by contacting our office at 518-432-4188 or by going on to our website (www.inourouwnvoices.org). A very dynamic way to show support and become more involved would be to sign up for Weekly Voices our e-newsletter, friend us on Facebook (www.facebook.com/ inourownvoices), follow us on Twitter (@ IOOV245) and share the information!

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Diversity Dr. Robert Miller Ph.D., M.Phil., L.M.S.W.

Audre Lorde said, “It is not our differences that divide us. It is our inability to recognize, accept, and celebrate those differences.” The implications for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered populations are significant. To highlight this point, consider the federal dollars spent on research on sexual minorities. The American Journal of Public Health published a study, “Research Funded by NIH on the Health of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgendered Populations.” The study found that of all biomedical research conducted between 1989 and 2011 (excluding research on HIV/ AIDS and other sexual health matters for LGBT population as a whole and by sub population) 113 or 0.1% of funded research has explicitly addressed LGBT communities. 0.2% of funded research has dealt with LGBT health prevention. Upon further examination, of the 113 LGBT funded studies, 86.1% concerned the health of sexual minority men; 13.5% focused on sexual minority women, and 6.8% focused on transgender persons. A smaller proportion of studies involved bisexual men and women (14.8% and 6.5% respectively). The data did not identify the number of studies within the 113 that focused solely on sexual minorities of color. These data suggest the tax dollars collected by gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered populations are not being spent proportionally to understand LGBT mental and physical health.

Engaging in diversity is an act of bravery, curiosity and an intention to be better. There are many reasons for the lack of proportional federal allotment of research dollars for the health and wellness of LGBT populations. Some reasons include: the number and quality of LGBT-related grant applications; (2) the number of people who are culturally competent in the areas of LGBT health reviewing the applications; and (3) the political climate which allows Congress to authorize the NIH budget.

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The notion of congressional appropriations is strangely, a very local matter. The US Congress is compiled of locally elected officials, who depend on you for their jobs. This gives rise to the question, “Is diversity important to you, as a person with the privilege to vote?” Moreover, is diversity and inclusion important to your everyday thinking? Once again, the personal is actually political. Diversity requires deliberate intentionality and action within the context of courage. It also requires an ability to look past the obvious to see the essential. Our natural inclination is to search out and find our own - to seek or search for what we know. We’ve heard the expression, he or she “feels like home for me.” Conversely for many, searching out and honoring that which is different or “other” potentially requires a set of motivations, skills, and a willingness “to honor the other.” It highlights the question, “Can we authentically embrace difference?” Engaging in diversity is an act of bravery, curiosity and an intention to be better. It demonstrates a peculiar strength of character and integrity. We also have to recognize reaching for difference is potentially challenging because it may be confused with losing ourselves or threatening our way of life. If I share my culture, values and mores with you, will you honor them in the way they were intended? Can you handle the gift of what I treasure? Diversity requires us (individually and collectively) to move from the “me” to “a we.” It seems to me Ms. Lorde’s quote recognizes the challenges and insists that we “get past them.” Through the quote, she invites us to gather our individual intellectual, psychological, emotional and spiritual courage to see the other – not as a threat to our individual self-definition, but rather as an opportunity for our greater good.

An example of the greater good is the proportional funding of NIH dollars for LGBT populations.

Diversity requires deliberate intentionality and action within the context of courage. The radical nature of diversity is a decision to reject fear. Ms. Lorde’s quote is the reminder that we have been doing this work for a long time. We can certainly mark progress. However, when we examine the reasons for differential health outcomes, economic disparities, and housing inequities between LGBT populations of color compared to the larger LGBT community, a glaring question remains, “Are the decision making bodies that have influence and power sufficiently diverse to effect the kind of change that results in a just and healthy society?” Voting for a congressional member who understands and honors diversity is one important step we can take. Determining whether we are sufficiently courageous to engage in diversity and inclusion in our personal lives seems like the first consideration.

Robert L. Miller, Jr.,Ph.D., M.Phil., L.M.S.W. is the Director of The Research Training and Education Core of the University at Albany, Center for the Elimination of Health Disparities. A federally funded researcher, he explores the intersection of spirituality, social welfare and public health, as it relates to HIV disease in The United States and Africa. Dr. Miller is also the chairman of the Board of Director’s for In Our Own Voices.


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These Presbyterian Churches Welcome You Where you can find a place ~ come as you are!

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Albany First Presbyterian 362 State Street (at Willett) www.firstpresalbany.org Sunday Worship 8:30 am & 10:45 am

Guilderland Hamilton Union Presbyterian Church 2291 Western Avenue www.HamiltonUnionPresbyterianChurch.org Sunday Worship 8:30 am & 10:00 am

Saratoga Springs Presbyterian-New England Congregational 24 Circular Street www.pnecchurch.org Sunday Worship 10:45 am

Albany West End Presbyterian 585 Central Avenue westendpc@nycap.rr.com Sunday Worship 11:00 am

Hudson Falls First Presbyterian Church 5 River Street www.fpchudsonfalls.org Sunday Worship 10:00 am

Scotia Trinity Presbyterian Church 185 Swaggertown Rd. www.scotiatrinity.org Sunday Worship 10:00 am

Albany Westminster Presbyterian 262 State Street / 85 Chestnut Street www.WPCalbany.org Sunday Worship 10:00 am

Lansingburgh (Troy) Cornerstone Community Church 570 3rd Avenue www.cornerstoneccl.org Sunday Worship 10:30 am

Amsterdam United Presbyterian Church 25 Church Street www.upchurch25.org Sunday Worship 9:30 am

Putnam Station Putnam United Presbyterian Church 365 County Route 2, PO Box 8 518-547-8378 Sunday Worship 10:00 am

Spencertown St. Peter’s Presbyterian Church 5219 County Route 7 spencertown.wix.com /stpeterspresbyterianchurch Sunday Worship 10:00 am Troy First United 1915 Fifth Avenue (downtown) www.unitedprestroy.org Sunday Worship 10:00 am

Colonie Roessleville Presbyterian Church Elmhurst and Central Avenue 518-459-2816 Sunday Worship 9:30 am

Rensselaer First Presbyterian Church in Greenbush 34 Broadway 518-463-0894 Sunday Worship 9:30 am

Valatie First Presbyterian Church 3212 Church Street 518-758-9658 Sunday Worship 11:00 am

Delmar Delmar Presbyterian Church 585 Delaware Avenue www.delmarpres.org Sunday Worship 10:00 am

Rensselaerville Rensselaerville Presbyterian Church Main Street at Methodist Hill Road 518-797-9303 (Summer only) Sunday Worship 11:00 am (Summer only)

West Charlton West Charlton United Presbyterian 1331 Sacandaga Road www.westcharltonUPC.org Sunday Worship 10:30 am

More information at www.presrainbow.org


The Post-DOMA World:

Should You and Your Spouse File an Amended Joint Return? by

Alejandro Taylor, Esq.

2013 certainly was an exciting time for equal marriage rights. One of the most momentous changes in 2013 was the decision in United States v. Windsor, where the Supreme Court found § 3 of the Defense of Marriage Act unconstitutional. Beginning this year, the federal government will treat all marriages, so long as they are valid where celebrated, as valid marriages for purposes of federal law. In reaction to the Windsor decision, the IRS published guidance for samesex spouses who may want to file jointly. In Revenue Ruling 2013-17, the IRS made clear that same-sex spouses may choose to amend returns for open years, but would not be required to do so. In general, married taxpayers must file either singly or jointly. In addition, most taxpayers have three (3) years from the filing of a return to amend a return and request a refund based on that amended tax return. For most taxpayers, that means that tax returns from 2010, 2011, and 2012 can be amended to reflect a change in filing status. If the married taxpayers had a significant difference in income, it could be advantageous to file amended returns.

As you get ready to file your 2013 tax returns, and perhaps file jointly with a spouse for the first time, be sure to consider your options. Consider this example: Vinny and Tommy were married in Massachusetts in 2007. Vinny earned $25,000 and Tommy earned $50,000 in 2010. They both claimed filing status of Single in 2010. In this simplified example, Vinny’s federal taxes would be about $1,933 and Tommy’s would be about $6,350, for a total federal income tax of $8,283 for 2010. Had they been allowed to file jointly, their total tax bill would only have been $7,611, representing a difference of $672. The good news for Tommy and Vinny is that they still have time to file an amended return to change their filing status to Married Filing Jointly and claim the refund of $672 since the statute of limitations for filing a claim for a refund doesn’t end until April 18, 2014. If they file an amended 2010 return before that date, their claim will be considered timely.

Obviously, everyone’s tax situation will vary. If Vinny’s and Tommy’s incomes were similar, there would be less of an incentive to file amended returns as there would be less of a difference between their effective tax rates. For same-sex spouses considering filing amended returns, speaking to a qualified tax preparer will help them decide if filing amended returns for 2010, 2011, or 2012 is worth the time and costs involved. Same-sex spouses might want to consider dependency-related tax credits (e.g. Earned Income Tax Credit, Child Tax Credit, and Additional Child Tax Credit) before automatically assuming filing an amended return is in their best interest. As you get ready to file your 2013 tax returns, and perhaps file jointly with a spouse for the first time, be sure to consider your options with regard to amended returns. It just may have a real impact on your taxes and could potentially result in a refund from a former year. Alejandro Taylor is an attorney in the Low Income Taxpayer Clinic at the Legal Aid Society of Northeastern New York. This article is not meant to constitute legal advice, but rather to inform readers of changes in tax law stemming from the Windsor decision.

LAW OFFICE OF ANNE REYNOLDS COPPS Casey Copps DiPaola, Associate Kate Siobhan Howard, Associate

126 State Street, 6th Flr. Albany, New York 12207 518.436.4170

arcopps@nycap.rr.com kdipaola@nycap.rr.com katesiobhanhoward@nycap.rr.com

Adoption Business Formation Education Law Employment Law Estate Planning Family Law Matrimonial Law Medicaid Planning Name Changes Real Estate

www.arcopps.net

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The Mountaintop director says gay rights are Civil Rights, too. by Michael Eck, Broadway Public Relations Liaison, Proctors & Capital Repertory Theatre Nick Mangano grew up in the lily-white Long Island suburb of Lynbrook, New York. But he never learned prejudice. His father, James, he remembers, “wasn’t an activist, per se, but he was very ahead of his time in his thinking. We were always discussing Civil Rights issues. Even in the extended family, if anyone ever made a remark, my father would be the first to step up and say, ‘please don’t say that.’”

legal precedents. That was very much about who I was at the time.”

It was a dark period for the gay community in ‘80s, with the advances of Stonewall being threatened anew from the resurgent right, as well as from the specter of AIDS. “It was a silent era. It took six thousand deaths from AIDS before Ronald Reagan even mentioned it. It was absurd what was going on.” Mangano, 55, did work on a San Francisco production of Tony Kushner’s Angels in America, but he says that earlier works in the canon, like Mart Crowley’s The Boys in the Band, did not have a powerful effect on him.

Mangano, who now resides in East Patchogue and teaches at Stony Brook Southampton, is directing Katori Hall’s The Mountaintop for Capital Repertory Theatre. The controversial play, ripe with magical realism and peppery language, imagines Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.’s last night on earth, in the hours between his epic “Mountaintop” speech for the Memphis Sanitation Strikers and his assassination on the morning of April 4, 1968. Mangano, spurred no doubt by his father’s teachings, has been a student of Martin Luther King his entire life. The director recalls hearing about King as a child, noting that he was ten at the time of the Civil Rights leader’s death. But Mangano’s own investment in social change was sparked in the early 1980s. “AIDS was the real catalyst in terms of my activism,” he says. “My involvement is linked to the gay rights movement, which is personal for me.” Mangano participated, of course, as an artist, but he was also invested in a boots-onthe-ground way, working for the legal department of an AIDS-related social service agency. “That was a real opportunity to fully understand all of the injustices that were going on, and, thankfully, make changes through

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Shakespeare did. In graduate school, Mangano assembled an adaptation of Measure for Measure that wove homosexuality into the plotline, “because at that point in time sodomy laws were being reviewed and things were getting more and more conservative, which raised the same questions (about sex outside of marriage) that are in the play.” The Mountaintop, which runs through February 9 at the downtown playhouse, is, as noted, a historical fiction. It posits King as a man, rather than a myth. In the company of a curious Lorraine Motel maid named Camae (Liz Morgan), King (Brandon Jones) smokes, drinks and cusses. There’s a palpable sense of dread in King’s persona; he knows he is living, quite literally, under the gun. But Camae winds him through a serpentine conversation, eventually leading him to grace and a hard won peace. At one point, after King has lit a Pall Mall and taken a sweet drag, Camae says, “you smoke like a fruit.” King, like Mangano’s father would have, tells her not to use that word. The moment opens a door to an even wider conversation about King’s views on homosexuality; and how he might have felt seeing the Civil Rights struggles of the gay community over the ensuing 45 years. Mangano, whose family, perhaps not surprisingly, was accepting when he came out in his young teens, says, “It’s clear that the King in this play is supportive.”

“The topic also comes up at the end of the play, when King has a vision for the fu ture, of a country where you should be able love whom you choose to love, which, of course, is marriage equality today.” King, Mangano points out, didn’t directly address homosexuality, but many feel he would be receptive, like his character in play. “There is no quote we can reference and determine whether he would be for gay rights today or not, but one of his very close friends was Bayard Rustin, who was openly gay and was a major force in the Civil Rights movement.” As for Mangano’s own thoughts on gay marriage and the current state of gay rights, he says,” There are still small battles to be fought, but I feel that the war is coming to an end.” The Mountaintop through Sunday, Feb. 9. Performance times: 7:30 p.m. Tuesday through Thursday; and 8 p.m. Friday and Saturday—with matinees 3 p.m. Saturday; 2 p.m. Sunday. Capital Repertory Theatre, 111 N. Pearl Street, Albany. Tickets range from $20 to $60. Students with valid ID: $16 all shows. For tickets and information, call TICKETS BY PROCTORS, (518) 445SHOW (7469) or visit capitalrep.org. Michael Eck, for 20 years the chief theatre critic for the Times Union, is Broadway Public Relations Liaison for Proctors & Capital Repertory Theatre.


Introducing Pat Regan a New Member of the Pride Center Board of Directors I’d like to introduce myself as a new member on the Board of Directors at the Pride Center. I have always lived in the Capital Region, and have seen the Pride Center change greatly through the years. What I bring to the board that is a little different is that I am a proud transwoman. I feel the Pride Center has been lacking in the attention given to trans* issues in the prior decades, and hopefully my appointment can help change that.

All of the inequalities and discrimination that you overcame are the same ones we are struggling to overcome now. My business life included owning quite a few apartments in Albany and starting Spa Stone Massage, a hot stone massage, and thai stone massage training company. Lastly I ran a federally subsidized senior project in Albany for 28 years. I loved to travel going to Indonesia, Asia, Africa, Mexico, South and Central America, and Europe. What do I want to do with the Pride Center? So much!!!! SO SO MUCH!!!! If you are gay or lesbian over fifty years old then you remember what it was like in the 1970’s or worse in the 1960’s (I know I do), to me it feels like that’s what its like for transpeople today. All of the inequalities and discrimination that you overcame are the same ones we are struggling to overcome now. If you are twenty or thirty years old you may not remember those

struggles, but what you do remember is being teased at school, or having your parents not accept you, or having to hide who you were and feeling ashamed of yourself. All of these commonalities tie us together in a bond. So what my first wish would be is to have the gay, lesbian, and bisexual communities become allies in our struggle not just by voice, but by working with us to help bring change. Not to just say “Sure, I support transpeople” but, to get involved with the Pride Center, GENDA, TACR, the Empire Conference, to actually help us, and for us also to work on GLB issues. A lot of our issues are yours and vice versahow many butch lesbians or fem gays are regularly harassed or discriminated against just because they challenge gender norms? How many transgender individuals have benefited by marriage equality? Let’s all get together and do a round table discussion on how we can all help each other. Our first step is to actually get to know each other, and I look forward to being a part of that.

T h e P r i d e C e n t e r w e lco m e s Am e r i co r p s V ISTA A l i s o n H o r g a n The Pride Center of the Capital Region has a new member of the family! Alison Horgan is an AmeriCorps VISTA with Siena College working at The Pride Center of the Capital Region as a Program Development Assistant. In this role, she will be assisting with the development of the Pride Center’s youth program by strengthening its existing community connections and creating new ones. Graduating from The Academy of the Holy Names in 2002, she went on to Manhattan College with a track scholarship, graduating Cum Laude in 2006 with two degrees; Psychology and Communications. After college, Alison moved back to Albany and briefly worked at La Salle Institute before accepting a position at the New York State Senate in the Office of the Majority Leader. She worked at the Senate for 6 years before taking a year off to join AmeriCorps and will be returning to work for the Senate when her year of service is up, in August 2014. When she first joined AmeriCorps in July 2013, Alison was living and working on the Gulf Coast in South Mississippi. “It is true when they say ‘there’s no place like home’, says Alison. While the beach and warm weather were a wonderful change

and the work fulfilling, I missed my roots and transferred home.” What is AmeriCorps VISTA? Great question! Founded as Volunteers in Service to America in 1965, AmeriCorps VISTA is a national service program designed specifically to fight poverty in America. Each VISTA member makes a year-long, full-time commitment to serve on a specific project at a nonprofit organization or public agency. With passion, commitment, and hard work, VISTA’s create or expand programs designed to bring individuals and communities out of poverty. In addition to her professional career, Alison is a musician and vocalist. She has been performing in school and community theatre since 1997, has been a pianist since the age of 4, has been a member of her church choir since the age of 13, has sang in numerous vocal competitions and played keyboard and sang female lead vocals with a local rock and blues band. She is also a karaoke queen. Performing under the name ‘Ali Fabulous’, you can usually find her anywhere that has karaoke or an open mic night. She is also a hunter; a fact about her that surprises most people.

In her words, transferring home was the best decision she could have made. “Since I have been home, I have felt the warmth and sense of community I so missed. Home to me isn’t just where the heart is; it is where my family is, where my love of music started, where my friends are and where my awareness for community service began. While I was away, I realized how important home is to me, and why I had to finish my year of service at home in my community, in my Albany.” Welcome home Alison, and welcome to the Pride Center of the Capital Region! We are very excited to have you!

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At the Intersec tions of Feeling and Intellec tualizing by Lyndon Cudlitz, Community Education Program Manager I had known for years: life was different for me as a working class LGBTQ person compared to middle- and upper-class LGBTQ people. I could so easily feel the differences and experiences that set me apart. And though I loved my working-class queer community dearly and derived from it a great sense of resilience and pride, I knew intimately the realities of not having access to the same opportunities and privileges as other people (such as having access to most LGBTQ conferences or being able to buy masculine clothing that would fit a female body). I had been told for years: life was different for me as a white LGBTQ person compared to LGBTQ people of color. I challenged myself to think about how my experience was, in fact, different (such as seeing my race reflected in most media portrayals of LGBTQ people or not fearing mistreatment from police if I experience a hate crime). Then I noticed a stark difference. The areas of my identity where I personally experienced oppression invoked a feeling of pain at the core of my being. This motivated me to activism with intense passion because it felt like a necessity for my community. In contrast, I was intellectualizing other injustices, such as racism, instead of feeling the depths of their consequences. Fighting for the rights of other people felt more like an option, not a necessity. So how did I bring this unconscious disparity to the surface? For almost a decade I’ve conducted a yearly personal exercise – a challenge, a reminder. I make a chart listing social groupings and within each, the groups that carry the most social power and privilege, and those with less (remember, this isn’t about exceptions on an individual basis, this is about larger systems that are institutionally reinforced). Then I mark where I fall for each social grouping.

The chart provided here is an abbreviated example and can serve as a starting place. Other social groupings such as ethnicity, religion, age, and citizenship status also affect our access to power and resources. Additionally, some groupings such as age and class cannot be easily divided into two distinct categories: we know that some people have more access to power than others, but it’s difficult to define a precise cutoff point. Lastly, it is important to note the role that perceived identity has when assessing our access to power and resources (for example, my disabilities are often invisible and may afford me some of the privileges that ablebodied people have).

By being aware of how we intellectualize vs feel about different injustices, we begin to shift to a place of greater empathy and compassion. Conducting this activity teaches me that I have a role in each of these systems, not just the ones that are so often on the forefront of my mind. It serves as a reminder that I am not just one thing nor the sum of my parts, but rather that each of these identities (and more!) affect one another.

Remember, this isn’t the Oppression Olympics; it’s not about “who is most oppressed.” This activity is about starting to examine what parts of our identities are granted or denied access and how we contribute to or are affected by systems of oppression. By being aware of how we intellectualize vs feel about different injustices, we begin to shift to a place of greater empathy and compassion. We ALL have experienced being part of social groups with more social power and less social power. Our unique combination of identities plays a significant role in how we navigate society and interact with others, whether we are aware of it or not. I find the more I challenge myself to be aware of, the more I grow as an activist, as a community member, and as a human being.

I invite you to further expand your awareness, too, with the following activity:

* A Three-Part Challenge *

Step 1: Make your chart. Mark where you fall for each social grouping. Notice your thoughts and feelings about your own chart. Step 2: Make combinations. Pick any two of your identities and ask yourself how these are connected in your life. For example, “How does being transgender affect my experience as a Christian?” or “How does being white affect my experience as a lesbian?” You can even use this as a journal or blog prompt! Step 3: Consider your causes. Despite all oppressions being connected, we so often only focus on one cause that we feel truly passionate about. Almost always, this is connected to an identity of ours where we are oppressed. Your challenge is to pick two causes to get involved in, one from a place where you hold less social power and one where you hold more, and to give them equal passion and effort.

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GET REAL with a New Youth Education Night at the Pride Center by Lyndon Cudlitz, Community Education Program Manager

YOUth asked for it, and we heard YOUth! The Pride Center is excited to announce a new monthly night for LGBTQA youth ages 13-18. With feedback from the incredible young people of the Center Youth program, we have added a monthly educational night to complement our current social, support, and leadership programs.

GET REAL will feature a new topic every month, such as healthy relationships, gender identity, and how to support a friend in need. Quarterly, GET REAL will be delivering comprehensive sexuality education that is affirming and relevant to the needs of LGBTQ youth.

This new night seeks to empower young people by providing opportunities to explore life skills, identity development, healthy communication, and social justice. GET REAL kicks off Friday, February 14, 5:30-7p with a workshop on Queer Relationships. We will be discussing different kinds of relationships, what we call them, what kinds we might want or not want, and how we see role models for healthy queer relationships. Afterwards, youth can attend Youth Group, 7-8:30p!

GET REAL 2nd Fridays, 5:30-7p Pride Center, 332 Hudson Ave, Albany

For more information, contact lcudlitz@capitalpridecenter.org or 518-462-6138 x16.

THE ALBANY GAY MEN’S CHORUS BEGINS ITS SIXTH YEAR AND IS LOOKING FOR NEW MEMBERS!!! Do you sing in the shower or the car? Do you have an untapped desire to entertain? Would you like to sing with other male voices in harmony? Good news! The Albany Gay Men’s Chorus is currently auditioning new singers for the Spring season! The spring concert, called “The Albany Gay Men’s Chorus Does S&M: Songs from Stage and Musicals,” consists of some of the greatest pieces for men’s voices in musical theater repertoire. The Albany Gay Men’s Chorus was founded in the Spring of 2008 in collaboration with Dr. Joseph Eppink of the College of Saint Rose, who was experienced in establishing choral groups. With Dr. Eppink’s help, and the help of a subsequent director, Dan Persico, the group has grown and become an integral part of the community. Providing much support and energy is current director Christopher L. Clark, who came to the Chorus in September, 2012 and has been instrumental in creating a

most cohesive group. In November, 2010, the AGMC officially affiliated with the Pride Center of the Capital Region forming a relationship that continues to today. Although the AGMC has developed a strong collaboration within the gay community, it has partnered with other groups including the St. Andrew’s Church Choir, the College of Saint Rose Women’s Chorale and Albany Pro Musica. The AGMC takes an active role in networking with gay affirming churches in the Capital Region which has given the Chorus opportunities to sing in many different venues. The AGMC has also sought to give back to the community by donating a portion of its concert proceeds to various not-for-profit groups including the Pride Center of the Capital Region, the Albany Damien Center,

Our Brothers’ Keepers Foundation, the Overflow Shelter sponsored by the Albany Area Council of Churches, and Marriage Equality New York. The group has also collected items for local food pantries and prepared food for the emergency shelter. The group has just begun a new concert season and is looking for singers interested in joining. Non-singers for the “fifth section” are also welcome to contact us. Rehearsals are on Tuesdays from 6:45-8:45pm, at First Lutheran Church of Albany, 181 Western Avenue (State Street side) and began on January 14th—but it is not too late to join. E-mail at albanygmc@ yahoo.com to schedule an audition time or to ask any questions you might have, or visit http://www.albanygmc.org/. Auditions consist of singing a song, basic sight reading, and tonal memory. Please check out this group!

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Enroll in Health Insurance Today to Avoid the Penalty! The Pride Center Can Help. by Steve Hendrickson, Healthcare Enrollment Coordinator Greetings and Happy New Year! Since the New Year is here, this is a good opportunity to talk more about health insurance coverage. You are now required to have a health insurance plan and must sign up for a plan by February 15th to avoid being penalized in your tax returns. If you need health insurance and have not yet signed up it’s easy to do. We have a new program here at the Pride Center to help people enroll in affordable healthcare. It is a free and confidential service and we have staff that are specifically trained to help people sign up for healthcare – our Healthcare Enrollment Coordinators. Having a Healthcare Enrollment Coordinator help you through this process will take away a lot of stress. The Affordable Care Act is very new for everyone, so it’s just a matter of learning the process. I have met with a number of people and helped guide them through the process of registering and selecting a healthcare plan. Once you have created an online account and registered through the website, you will be able to see all the health plans that you qualify for; from there you can select a plan that suits your budget and healthcare needs. I have personally helped people sign up for health insurance using the New York State of Health Marketplace website: www.NYStateofhealth.ny.gov. One of the very first people who made an appointment with me did not have any insurance.

We sat down together and started from the beginning and at the end, she was fully covered with a quality healthcare plan that was very affordable for her. She was so relieved and happy at how easy the whole process was. It was a perfect example of how the system should work. I have even worked with some folks that already had health insurance, either through an employer or a private plan and they have found a more affordable plan with better coverage through the online Marketplace: New York State of Health.

We are a part of the LGBT community and the help we offer is open to anyone who needs help getting affordable health care. The Marketplace is a term used to define the online website to register for health insurance. Once all the information about the person, employer or family is entered, the Marketplace will list all the plans that work for the specific person. The online Marketplace is where individuals, families, and employers can go to see all the plans that they qualify for. The online Marketplace is also very inclusive of LGBTQ needs including same sex couples, transgender people and anyone living in your household. New York State does recognize same sex marriage and people are eligible to cover their same sex spouse through the Marketplace.

The plans offered are very comprehensive and affordable to make everyone feel comfortable with the cost and your healthcare needs. To avoid owing a penalty for not having health insurance this year the deadline for buying a plan is February 15, 2014. The penalty amounts to $95 or 1% of the family income, whichever is greater. This fee will be collected when you file your federal income taxes. So to avoid a penalty, people must have coverage by March 31, 2014. And to buy an exchange plan that starts March first, consumers have to sign up by February 15, 2014. The rules do allow people to have a short gap in coverage of less than three consecutive months before they get the penalty. Even though people are supposed to have insurance on January 1, 2014, as long as they have coverage by March 31 they can avoid the fine.

For more information or to make an appointment call the Pride Center of the Capital Region at 518462-6138 or email us at healthcare@capitalpridecenter.org

Don’t Delay! Apply for the Pride Center Youth Scholarship Today! by

James Shultis,Youth Program Coordinator

The Pride Center is proud to announce that applications are now available for the Pride Center Youth Scholarship! This scholarship is intended to help Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Trans*, Queer/Questioning (LGBTQ) and their allies who exemplify leadership, academic achievement and commitment to LGBT equality. Applicants must be an LGBTQ or ally identified high school senior.

Scholarships of up to $2,500 will be offered to at least four graduating high school seniors who have been accepted at two or four year accredited colleges or universities. Applications will be reviewed by a commit-

tee tasked with assessing the following; academic record, commitment to the LGBTQ community as demonstrated by past activity and future ambitions, financial need and the quality and content of the personal statement.

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Please help us spread the word!

If you know an LGBTQ or ally identified senior in high school who would be a good candidate for this scholarship, please contact James Shultis, Youth Program Coordinator by email at jshultis@capitalpridecenter.org, or call 462-6138. For more information, or to access a scholarship application, please visit our website at www.capitalpridecenter.org. Applications for the 2014 Pride Center Youth Scholarship are due Friday, May 2!


A New New Year’s by Joshua Radliff Maybe just make ONE resolution that you can actually keep.

New Years is a crossroads with many different directions one could take. Do you make resolutions? Do they include the “usuals” such as losing weight, saving money, partying less, being a “better you”? How many have you accomplished in the past? I called them the usuals for a reason. Unfortunately, many folks don’t attain these goals. Why don’t resolutions stick? Have your resolutions been successful in the past? Is it harder to accomplish your goals then you thought? Do you feel as if you’ve “failed” if you are unsuccessful? Resolutions don’t have to be pass-fail, but we have to reframe our thinking. “I resolve to…” is pass-fail because the resolution is either met or it’s not. A good reframe might include the word try, as in “I resolve to try…” This reframe allows something special: forgiveness and the permission to try again. So for example let’s use the resolution of eating healthier. What has happened in the past when you’ve made a commitment to eat better? Have you discovered that you begin to fall back into eating overly-large portions? Did you go into the resolution saying, “I’m not going to EVER eat any more *insert food*,” Is this a realistic goal? Notice this scenario is set up to fail. Instead of thinking in such absolute terms, reframe your thinking and

Poem:

New Year 2014 Taylor Keith

tell yourself that you will try not to eat so much of the desired food. You could try to eat more vegetables, use a smaller plate, drink a glass of water prior to eating, etc. See the difference? Remember the phrase, “If at first you don’t succeed, try again” – there’s truth in this time tested idiom. So when it has been four weeks since you last exercised, and you are starting to feel unattractive, you have not failed, because you said you’d try, and now you can try again. By reframing the thought process into trying to exercise more often, the goal now acknowledges and allows for the challenges in changing old patterns

Think of smaller resolutions as objectives, mile- markers.

All this being said, what happens when you try over and over and still feel like a failure? Let’s look at this through the following lens: you’ve spent how many years going down the path you’re on, struggling to make changes? Do you really think that after a few months of improved behaviors you should be able to simply coast along without much effort? Once again, don’t set yourself up for failure. If the resolution has to do with one of your biggest vices consider not making as many resolutions. Maybe just make ONE resolution that you can actually keep.

If the resolution has been to lose weight year after year without success, a better resolution having real potential for attainment might be trying to drink water before each meal. Think of smaller resolutions as objectives, mile- markers if you will, towards the overarching goal and ultimate desire. If the goal is to get into shape, the objectives could be activities such as exercising a few times a week and eating healthier snacks, accomplished through purchasing smaller quantities and doing so less frequently. Remember, don’t set yourself up for failure by thinking the resolution can only be met if you never ever enjoy that tasty treat again. It might be more realistic to eat treats mostly at special occasions or at certain time intervals. It’s also important to note that resolutions can be made any time of year; after all, January 1 might not the best time if you resolve to thoroughly exercise and you strongly prefer outdoor activities.. Whether resolutions are made at New Years or any other time, the point is to resolve to try. Joshua Radliff, MHC, is a family therapist at Choices Counseling & Consulting 518-4382222. http://choicesconsulting.com/ Josh counsels individuals and couples from a wide array of lifestyles, specializing in working with men who engage in relationships with other men.

It’s a New Year Tomorrow “New Year, New Me” post everywhere I go I’d make a resolution but I won’t keep to it New Year with the same amount of rights I can get married in 18 states -but it’s banned in 32 ENDA didn’t pass, my trans* friend is losing hope-he feels like no one is on his side We embrace LGBTQA but we bash the B and T DASA was passed but the schools are still failing us These events are silver linings on a beautiful June Sunset My best friend can bring in the New Year with her 32 year old boyfriend - she’s 18 But if I try to bring in the New Year with my girlfriend I am “attacking” the holiday So no New Year kisses for me, just a smile on FaceTime and apple juice in a wine glass Goodbye 2013, you won’t be missed Hello 2014, I’ve been looking for a new start for a

Long time

Taylor Keith is a member of the Pride Center’s Center Youth Action Team and student at Albany Leadership Charter High School for Girls

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Nominations now being accepted! 2014 Annual Awards The Pride Center is seeking nominations for the 2014 Annual Awards to be given out at the Awards Gala on October 24, 2014. Do you know someone in the Capital Region who does outstanding work for the LGBT community? If so, please review the award categories and submit your nomination today! The nomination deadline is May 2, 2014. To nominate an individual, business or organization, download the Nomination Form from www.capitalpridecenter.org and return it to the Pride Center Board of Directors, 332 Hudson, Albany, New York 12210 by fax to (518) 462-2101 or e-mail; cstreett@capitalpridecenter.org Awards will be selected at the discretion of the Pride Center Board of Directors. The Pride Center reserves the right to limit the number of awards and may not give awards in every category. Final selections will be made by the Pride Center Board of Directors.

***SAVE THE DATE *** ***PRIDE CENTER GALA 2014*** FRIDAY OCTOBER 24, 2014

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QueerEngineer Get to know us & how you can support LGBTQ* students in science, technology, engineering, & mathematics. /QueerEngineer

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Our thinking is not. Worship Every Sunday 10:00 a.m. “Comma Club for Kids” 9:00 a.m. Children’s Program during Worship

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Journey United Church of Christ NEW LOCATION: 27 Hannay Lane (off 9W) (Cyprus Shrine) Glenmont, NY 12077 (Behind Milestone; near Johnny B’s)

No matter who you are or where you are on life’s journey, you’re welcome here. God is Still Speaking

518-729-7127 www.journeyucc.com find us on Facebook

Seeking to be a Multicutural, Multiracial, Accessible to All, Open and Affirming, Peace and Justice Congregation that welcomes all regardless or frace, gender o rsexual orientation.

A Pride Center of the Capital Region affiliate

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T r an s V ie w #119

by

M oonhaw k River Ston e

© 2014

Why It Matters That We Get The Name & Pronoun Right! Both transgender adults and children have a very difficult time when someone does not address them with their preferred name and pronoun.

Let’s begin this column by noting some big changes that will be occurring this year at CommUNITY and with this column. First off, I will no longer be able to write at will to a word length sufficient to a topic I might select. That will affect the topics I choose and how I choose to address them as I will have only 750 words to do so. Secondly, all column writers have been asked to only write 8 of their usual 10 columns in order to allow for other voices. I asked the editors that when I take my break if Trans View might have guest columnists for those breaks, and they consented. Guest columnists will be appearing in May and October. I felt it imperative that a transgender voice be present in every issue of CommUNITY. The editors and I are working on a tentative arrangement whereby longer versions of my columns might appear on the Pride Center website. We’ll see.

Now on to the topic at hand--

Both transgender adults and children have a very difficult time when someone does not address them with their preferred and/or newly legal name and pronoun. Whether this misattribution is out of innocent error, grief about the change in the transgender person’s life, ignorance wrought of transphobia, malice or violence does not make a difference. For transgender people whose impaired ego strength and coping skills do not allow them to either dismiss and brush off--or even laugh off--such insults or to appropriately and clearly address them, this misattribution is a killer--a killer of selfesteem, a killer of confidence, of selfassurance and can lead to an ongoing case of acute posttraumatic stress with all its symptoms and harmful outcomes. A colleague and friend of mine, Dr. Jo Olsen, MD of Los Angeles Children’s Hospital used a term recently on one of my trans professional listserves, “micro retraumatization” to describe these incidents of misattribution. I read that and thought “Brilliant!”, as I have been using the more recognized

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term retraumatization for a couple of decades.

Emotional and psychological trauma function in a very similar manner to biological toxicity. Since children are still so actively imbedded in the bio-psycho-social growth and development of childhood, they are particularly vulnerable to such micro retraumatization. Since pre-pubertal transgender children do not have access to the obvious markers of secondary sex characteristics puberty brings, how they express their transgenderedness to the world is through name and pronoun, dress and grooming. Since dress and grooming these days in the US can be quite unisex for children, that is not always a reliable way to correctly ascertain a child’s correct sex/gender. It follows then, that name and pronoun become of paramount and overarching importance to both the transgender child and their family. Being seen for whom one actually is remains one of the most important constructs to the healthy development of a human being- childor adult. While children can be remarkably resilient and children who are emotionally and psychologically challenged can become resilient with proper treatment, many transgender children do not have access to such support or treatment--or their therapist’s or counselor’s deep understanding of the incredibly traumatizing nature of the misattribution of name and pronoun. Proper use of name and pronoun needs to be an almost zero tolerance baseline in terms of the therapist support and affirmation of the child. As adults, those of us who have an unusual name, such as that from another culture, or a name which can be

frequently mispronounced--and/or made fun of--can identify with the trauma a transgender child experiences. Micro retraumatization refers to those constant, pervasive “little hits” that a child might experience, those “little” diminishments which over time add up, and unresponded to, or left uncorrected, create an overwhelming burden for the child. Children may exhibit all sorts of stress related symptoms from depression, to withdrawal from peers, loss of ability and interest in school work, anger outbursts and self harm. Bodies that take in a toxic substance and have the ability and opportunity to recover from the toxicity and resume a healthy state are vastly different from a body that is constantly under assault from a toxic substance. Those bodies are without recovery or the resumption of health, then the toxic body becomes “allergic” and in extreme cases the person dies from the toxicity. Emotional and psychological trauma function in a very similar manner to biological toxicity in human beings. We might analogize that posttraumatic stress is the “allergic” phase, and suicide is when the transgender person dies from the unrecovered toxicity of micro retraumatization. Exaggeration? Not. So, the lesson in all of this becomes not only that we treat all transgender individuals with their preferred name and pronoun, but that we treat all people with respect to their personhood. Since trauma is so pervasive, we need to constantly ask, “What happened to this person?”, and “How can I affirm them, and not micro retraumatize them?” Until next time...T Rev. Moonhawk River Stone of Riverstone Consulting is an Interfaith Minister, transgender activist, writer, educator, consultant, keynote speaker and psychotherapist in private practice for over 25 years with experience and extensive expertise in all aspects of transgender policy and health.


G e n d e r f * ck

by

Drew Cordes

Why I Flag (It’s Not Just About Sex) For me, flagging is a way to connect to my culture, even when there’s not another queer in sight.

For those who don’t know, or for those who are just vaguely aware of its existence, “flagging” (aka the handkerchief, hanky or bandana code) is the practice of wearing colored hankies or bandanas on the left or right side of one’s person to indicate an interest in certain sexual practices or fetishes, as well as a preference for being top/dom or bottom/sub.

t’s a link to my past. It reminds me of a time when people like me had to be silent. It reminds me that I’m lucky to live when I do, and that despite our ongoing struggle for justice and power, I’m still privileged in many ways. Flagging reminds me of the queer people who were around before me, the struggles they went through, and the sacrifices they made to give me and my friends a better life.

I don’t want to forget that. I want to remember that I should honor my culture by always giving it a voice. Flagging also is a way to stay visible for those who are often mistaken as straight and/or cis. Flagging is an identifier. It’s true that many queer people don’t know what the colors signify or what side is what, but they know it means something. They know it’s a sign that the person wearing them is queer. Flagging identifies me as a member of the community.

Flagging reminds me of the queer people who were around before me, the struggles they went through, and the sacrifices they made to give me and my friends a better life.

The history of this custom is a bit fuzzy (feel free to Google it), but it’s gener- For me, flagging is a way to connect to ally agreed upon that flagging’s boom my culture, even when there’s not an- A conversation I had a few years ago era was with gay men and some gay other queer in sight. I want to keep our with a leather dyke in her 50s about women around the 1970s. Back in the culture alive. I want acceptance, but I flagging’s place in our culture convinced me to start, and since I made the days of the love thatAdvocates dare not speak its don’t want toTransgender assimilate. Any people’s Advocates Transgender name, sporting a hanky kept you in- quest for acceptance should never have decision I’m noticing more and more of conspicuous the Capital Capital Region young queer and trans folks embracto straight Region people while to tread down theof paththe toward homogeingrights? the practice themselves. I hope this openlyCare signaling to other queers that it neity. The diversity of the world’s myrabout human rights? Care about human Join Advocates Join the Advocates continues and I hope they’re dowas safethe to Transgender make a move. If one wanted iad cultures is a fascinating andTransgender beau- trend of the Capital Region! of the Capital Region! to get specific, the left side denoted a tiful thing. “Celebrate diversity” has ing it for the same reasons of cultural TACR grassroots advocacy TACR is a but grassroots advocacy group visibility and historical top,isthea right side denoted bottom,group and become a two-word cliché, forgo preservation, made up of trans* identified folksnavy and the eye-rolling skepticism made upand of its trans* identified folks deference that Iand am, but even if they’re colors such as black, red, grey, mesallies dedicated to suppor ting and allies dedicated to suppor ting and just looking for fuck, that makes blue and yellow signified an interest in sage becomes powerful and relevant. empowering the trans* community of empowering the trans* communitya great of Newcertain York. sexual activities, like S&M, fistYork. Those who foughtNew in the past didn’t do me happy, too. Newcomers welcome! Newcomers ing, bondage, anal sex and watersports, so for the right to beEmail the ussame as ev- welcome! Email us at TransAdvocatesCR@gmail.com, at TransAdvocatesCR@gmail.com, and check out our facebook page at check could out our facebook page at respectively. eryone else; they fought and so they www.facebook.com/TransAdvocatesCR. www.facebook.com/TransAdvocatesCR. be different and still respected. I want Monthly meetings, first Thursdays, 7 pm, at the Monthly meetings, first Thursdays, pm, at the Albany 7resident Drew Cordes identifies as Women’s Building Women’s Building As being gay became moreto transgender, socially ac- to maintain what makes unique. A referring queer,totrans*, and genderqueer, and is a *Trans is an inclusive term referring *Trans us is an inclusive term transgender, transsexual, and other gender non-conforming people. transsexual, and other gender non-conforming people. ceptable due to more of us coming out major part of our unique culture has its part of the trans* social group Transgender Advocates of the Capital Region. and our gain of economic and politi- roots in silence; cal power, the need for a covert code waned. Flagging’s popularity endured Transgender Advocates Transgender Advocates mostly in the gay male leather/kink/fecommunity, and slowly spread to of tish the Capital Region of the Capital Region other queer members of the kink comCare about human rights? Care about human rights? munity. Today, hankies and bandanas Join the Transgender Advocates Join the Transgender Advocates of the Capital of the Capital Region! are flaunted just as Region! often by lesbian femmes, stone butches, genderqueers, TACR is a grassroots advocacy group TACR is a grassroots advocacy group trans bois, identified bears, bootblacks, made up folks, of trans* folks and made up of trans* identified folks and leather daddies, todiesel dykes ... just allies dedicated suppor ting and allies dedicated to suppor ting and empowering the under trans* empowering the trans* community of about anyone the community queer umbrel-of New York. New York. la who has a pervy side. Newcomers welcome! Email us at TransAdvocatesCR@gmail.com, and check out our facebook page at www.facebook.com/TransAdvocatesCR. Monthly meetings, first Thursdays, 7 pm, at the Women’s Building *Trans is an inclusive term referring to transgender, transsexual, and other gender non-conforming people.

Being queer and having a pervy side myself, I flag. However, I don’t display my colors because I’m looking for a good time. Well, not JUST because I’m looking for a good time. I flag because i

Newcomers welcome! Email us at TransAdvocatesCR@gmail.com, and check out our facebook page at www.facebook.com/TransAdvocatesCR. Monthly meetings, first Thursdays, 7 pm, at the Women’s Building *Trans is an inclusive term referring to transgender, transsexual, and other gender non-conforming people.

25


To be a blessing

by

Marni Gillard

Bringing Light to Shadows This article is one of a series provided by Advocates for Welcoming Congregations, a Capital Region group that encourages the welcoming of LGBT persons into the full life and leadership of communities of faith. The group also works to make visible for members of the LGBT community opportunities for practicing their faith traditions.

As a storyteller and listener by profession, I draw out life memories to help people see the past as a gift. Recently, I asked someone I’ve known well for the story of making peace with her sexuality and coming out. Listening as an ally, I mostly stayed quiet. My friend, valuing privacy, asked that I call her “Jane.” Our communion, as I listened, is now a powerful memory. I share Jane’s reflections with permission in the hope you might, with love and respect, ask for someone’s story — and share yours.

Who knows what light deep listening might bring to shadows in our Church? “I remember being maybe four or six, climbing up the chair of this beautiful lifeguard,” Jane began. “I was little, yet I see it as a first experience of love. I wanted to be this heroine.” Jane recalled fighting boy cousins to test her strength and loving her TV heroes: The Lone Ranger, Tonto, and Flash Gordon. Shari Lewis and Lamb Chop were just too soft and sweet. Jane smiled remembering her first grade nun. “She was Italian and taught us “Zum Gali Gali.” Jane wondered about the nun’s face and hair, partially hidden by her veil. When Sister left after that year, Jane wrote her and received letters back.

Next Jane told of an older girl, skillful at volleyball, and of a pretty social studies teacher, and a female Spanish teacher who encouraged her. “It wasn’t so mu ch attraction as a dreamy, lofty, joy being around strong smart females. I wanted to be like them.” In contrast, she had no love for sarcastic male teachers who enjoyed putting girls down. Two high school boyfriends appeared, one freshman year, another senior year, but both drifted away come summer. Jane later heard they “were going with” girls she knew. At a Catholic summer camp she found a counselor-in-training chum. But the following summer Jane’s mother asked her to stay home “to help your younger sibs adapt to their new stepfather.” Jane missed that season’s training, and the next year her nowcounselor friend had discovered boys. I could empathize with Jane’s confusing awakening to sexuality. When she felt strong sexual feelings for college roommates, her feelings scared her. Thinking them wrong, she prayed they’d disappear. Jane eventually met a lonely boy who liked her and offered intimacy. But her attraction to women didn’t abate. After college in a big city, she saw “gay normality,” but “the leather-biker bar I found helped me decide, ‘OK, I’m not a lesbian.’”

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She married her college boyfriend and had a son, but dreams about female coworkers persisted. When her son was 18 months, Jane’s mother spoke convincingly about having him baptized Catholic to keep them both connected to God and family. Jane complied. Not long after, her mother died of cancer, and a therapist helped Jane tackle her confusion and grief. Jane joined a group whose goal was coming out at work and had a first powerful relationship with an older woman, but it was short-lived. A local “womanist” group, led by a wise Catholic college chaplain, introduced her to re-birthing rituals and goddess study. It helped her make peace with leaving her marriage. That group disbanded, yet she continues learning about the connection between spirituality and sexuality. Today Jane is part of a welcoming American Baptist Church where gay and straight friends love and respect her. A rainbow flag on her car and home tell the world she’s proud of her true self. Her reputation for skillful spirit-centered body work has given her a confidence she be lieves will help her attract a woman partner for life. Jane’s story reminds me that storytelling would help my Catholic community break the weighty silence our LGBT sisters and brothers have carried too long. Who knows what light deep listening might bring to shadows in our Church? Marni Gillard’s life work is ministering through storytelling. Author of Storyteller, Storyteacher, you can find her at http://www. marnigillard.com/. A member of St. Kateri Tekakwitha Parish, Schenectady, Marni is working toward a Masters of Arts in Pastoral Studies at St. Bernard’s Theological Institute.


Money Matters

by

Thomas J. Walling CFP®

Prepay or Invest? Tom examines things like security, retirement, future cash flow, and alternate when considering prepaying your mortgage

Mortgage interest rates are at historically low levels. Odds are that they will be going up soon. A common question seems to be as to whether or not prepaying a fixed rate mortgages makes sense. As with everything, there are pros and cons associated with this decision. Everyone has different attitudes and priorities regarding debt.

Yes, prepaying will take time off the mortgage obligation and you will save some interest, but the bank is also a winner here. There are many reasons to pay off a mortgage early. Among others, these include aversion to debt, wanting to use the mortgage payment amount for something else, or just wanting to increase cash flow. When on a fixed income this becomes increasingly important. In retirement, the way to save money is not to spend it. If the home is paid off, cash is left on the table for other purposes and lowers the monthly income need. Think of paying off your mortgage as an investment. Real estate is an illiquid investment, in most cases requiring a sale of your home to cash in. Does it make more sense to invest that money or prepay the mortgage?

Fixed rate mortgages collect the principal (amount owed) and interest in such a way that at the inception of the loan, a higher portion of the payment is applied to interest. A much smaller portion goes toward principal. In later years, as the principal is paid off and less interest is due, the portion sways to higher principal payoffs until at the last payment a nominal amount is interest and the majority portion is principal. According to Bankrate.com, when one extra principal payment per year is added to your mortgage, the time to pay off a 30 year mortgage is reduced by 5-6 years. Yes, prepaying will take time off the mortgage obligation and you will save some interest, but the bank is also a winner here. Extra payments are for principal only and come off the principal of the loan. Now comes the tricky part. Yes, you will save some money in interest by prepaying. If you are prepaying the principal, you are allowing the bank the higher interest portion early payments. What this does is reduce the loan payment time at the same interest rate. The lender has a shorter loan with the same interest rate (a plus for them).

Thomas J. Walling Investment Advisor Representative Registered Representative Tower Square Securities, Inc.

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Sometimes, the lender will even charge to do this by selling biweekly payment schedules which add a payment per year. One thing to factor in when making this decision is the tax benefits of interest on a mortgage. If you are in 25% tax bracket, the benefits should be considered as net. If the interest rate is, for example, 6% on your mortgage, the truer number would usually be around 4.5% as the tax benefits should count. All other factors aside, If you think you can make more than 4.5% after tax on other investments, you should probably invest that money in something other than prepaying. Inflation has run at 2-3% per year. As time goes on, the mortgage amount stays the same as other things inflate. So, the amount of money you pay today is less than the payment would be in 10 years, factoring in inflation. If you have a low rate mortgage, perhaps paying it off does not make sense. Think of it as cheap money. Remember, however, that if you pay your taxes and homeowners insurance through escrow, these things will inflate as your principal and interest part stays the same. With a variable rate mortgage, there are different factors including bypassing the later year rate increases built in. So, as with most other things, whether to prepay your mortgage early is a personal decision. Things like security, retirement, future cash flow, and alternate investing are all factors. There could also be prepayment penalties. Seek the advice of a professional before making these decisions. These are but a few of the variables that should be considered. Weigh out the pros and cons and make an informed decision. Thomas J. Walling CFP® is an Investment Advisor Representative of and offers securities through Cetera Advisor Networks. (Member FINRA/SIPC) and a Registered Investment Advisor. Branch office: 235 Lark St. #43 Albany, NY 12210. He is also past presenter at the Pride Center on financial affairs affecting the LGBT community as well as for SAGE of NYC. Tom is past presidents of the board of directors of The Albany Damien Center, Inc. as well as Our Brothers’ Keepers Foundation. He can be reached at 518.878.1294 or Thomas.wall-

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AS K THE LAW YER

by

Ge ri Pom eran tz

SCOTUS Case To Watch in 2014 Geri discusses a consolidated case that brings the question of religious protection and health care to the Supreme Court.

The Supreme Court of the United States (SCOTUS) will be deciding a pair of cases involving religious challenges by for profit corporations to a federal requirement that employers provide health insurance for their workers that includes birth control and related medical services. The cases, Sebelius v. Hobby Lobby Stores and Conestoga Wood Specialties Corp v. Sebelius, have been consolidated for oral argument sometime around March 2014. The Affordable Care Act (ACA) requires, amongst other things, minimum standards for group health plans and insurers. These include coverage, without cost sharing (i.e., no deductible or copayments), for preventative health care services. Amongst the important preventative health services for women is a full range of contraceptive methods. The federal ACA allows for certain exemptions to the requirement of contraceptive coverage for “religious employers” -- defined as non-profit religious organizations, such as churches, or associations that have exclusively religious activities. Clearly, the religious exemption does not apply to a for profit corporation. Hobby Lobby is a nationwide chain of over 500 arts and crafts stores with over 13,000 full time employees. Their Albany area store is in Latham. After passage of the ACA, the for profit corporation excluded contraceptive coverage from its insurance and initiated a lawsuit against the federal government under the Religious Freedom Restoration Act (RFRA). The RFRA provides that government cannot impose a substantive burden on a person’s exercise of religion unless the government can show that the burden serves a compelling governmental interest and is the

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least restrictive means of doing so. In an unprecedented, and extremely dangerous ruling, the Federal Court of Appeals for the 10th Circuit held that the RFRA allows the for profit Hobby Lobby to deny employees health coverage, to which they are entitled by federal law, based on the religious objections of the individuals who own a controlling stake in the corporation. Like the controlling owners of Hobby Lobby, the owners of Conestoga Wood Specialties also possess the religious belief that life begins at conception, and claimed that the corporation should not be required to provide insurance that covers birth control for their employees. This for profit corporation makes wooden cabinets and has over 950 employees. Its challenge to the ACA is based on the RFRA and the first amendment’s freedom of religious exercise clause. However, in this case, the lower federal court rejected the corporation’s claims because corporations cannot exercise religion within the meaning of either the RFRA or the first amendment. Moreover, the lower court held that the ACA requirement is a neutral regulation of general applicability, which would not at any rate burden the exercise of religion. There are around 30 such similar cases pending around the country, in which for profit corporations are claiming that the corporation’s rights to exercise religion are violated by the ACA. Indeed, there is a third case pending a request for review by SCOTUS, Autocam Corp v. Sebelius, as of this writing, involving a corporation that engages in high volume manufacturing for the automotive and medical industries, with 1500 employees.

There are many critical questions here, which will have a wide ranging impact on the activities of the religious right. First, whether a business can be considered a person that can exercise religion under the RFRA and/or First Amendment religious expression clause. If the Court answers this question in the negative, the claims of the corporations will fail, at least under the RFRA. It is difficult to conceive of an intellectually honest way for the Court to answer this question in the affirmative. Secondly, will the Court allow a corporation to exercise the religious beliefs of its controlling shareholders? This is a pass through theory that is being urged by the religious right. It is yet another way to argue that businesses can have religious beliefs. Even if the Court allows the businesses’ claims to move forward, the Court must still answer the question whether the requirements of the ACA are applied generally to all entities – in other words if no entity is singled out for less favorable treatment because of religious beliefs, based on established precedent there should not be a viable free exercise claim. The legal rights of LGBTQ families are an ever-changing landscape, to be addressed monthly in this column. The material in this article is provided for informational purposes only and is not intended to give legal advice, and should not substitute for the independent advice of counsel.

Geri Pomerantz is an attorney in the capital district with a practice focused on family and matrimonial law, specifically including LGBTQ issues. Geri conducts continuing legal education training for other lawyers on issues of importance to the LGBTQ community. In January, she will be presenting two continuing legal education courses for lawyers regarding Representing LGBTQ Clients in a Post-Windsor World, for the Albany County Bar Association and the Empire Justice Center. Amongst other things, Geri is a member of the Collaborative Divorce Association of the Capital District. Geri can be reached at pomerantzlaw@albany.twcbc. com. The views expressed in this column are solely those of Ms. Pomerantz and do not reflect the opinion of the Pride Center.


M i ch ae l C o oks a nd You Ca n To o

by

Mich ael Mead e Rock Lobster Tails with Citrus Butter

A Romantic Dinner at Home Michael’s got a great, romantic 4-course meal that’ll help take the pressure off on Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day: a time of romance, red roses, heart-shaped chocolate boxes, candle-lit dinners…and pressure! If you’re already feeling the strain, here’s how to make sure that your romantic dinner for two comes off without a hitch. Brie wrapped in pastry and baked until it has thoroughly melted inside is one of the world’s easiest yet tastiest hors d’oeuvres. Here we have a Brie topped with raspberry jam, surrounded with pastry and drizzled with maple syrup. Next we have a tart, tangy salad with a homemade dressing, followed by broiled lobster tails, which you can serve with whatever kind of rice, potatoes and vegetables you find easiest to cook. If you don’t happen to like shellfish, a grilled or broiled steak will work deliciously with this menu instead. Add a warmed loaf of your favorite bakery bread. And since Valentine’s Day is synonymous with chocolate, we finish with a luscious chocolate fondue with fresh strawberries. Happy Valentine’s Day! Baked Brie in Pastry 1 large sheet of puff pastry or 1 tube of refrigerated crescent dinner rolls. 1 round or wedge of Brie cheese Raspberry jam (or any other sweet jam you prefer) Brown sugar ¼ cup maple syrup

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. On a non-stick cookie sheet or baking pan, lay the puff pastry or the crescent roll dough out flat and place the Brie in the center. Spread jam on the Brie, fold dough over top. Drizzle maple syrup and place a handful of brown sugar on top. Bake for 25 minutes, let cool before placing on platter and serving. Serve with crackers, apple slices and grapes.

Grilled Pear, Watercress and Walnut Salad 2 comice pears 6 oz. watercress 4oz. stilton cheese 1oz. walnut halves 4 slices French bread ½ oz chopped parsley Juice of ½ lemon (dressing) 1½ tbsp. walnut oil 1½ tbsp. olive oil ½ tsp. mustard 1 tbsp. white wine vinegar Pinch of sugar Salt and freshly ground black pepper

Heat a non-stick griddle pan until very hot. Cut the pear in half and remove the core. Brush the pear flesh with lemon juice. When the pan is hot place the pear on to the griddle pan and cook for 2-3 minutes. Turn over and cook the other side. When the pear is cooked and nicely marked remove from the pan. Slice the bread into long strips and place on to an oven tray. Drizzle with a little olive oil, season with salt. Bake for 5 minutes at 375 degrees until crisp and dry but not too brown. Place the watercress on the serving plate and dot the pears around. Break the cheese into pieces and place over the top. Sprinkle over the walnuts and parsley. Mix all the dressing together in a bowl and season. Add the strips of bread to the salad. Drizzle over the dressing and serve.

2 frozen rock lobster tails, about 6 to 8 oz. each, butterflied ¼ cup melted butter 2 tsp. fresh lemon juice ½ tsp. grated orange peel ¼ tsp. salt Dash of ground ginger Dash of paprika Lemon wedges

Place thawed lobster tails on broiler pan, shell side down. Combine butter, lemon juice, orange peel, salt, ginger and paprika. Brush over lobster tail meat. Broil rock lobster tails 6 to 8 inches from heat for about 8 to 10 minutes, or until meat is opaque and is firm to the touch (follow directions on package). Be careful not to let it burn. Loosen meat from shell slightly; serve rock lobster tails with lemon wedges. Chocolate Fondue with Fresh Strawberries 5oz. dark chocolate, broken into pieces (or dark chocolate chips) 7oz. heavy cream ½ oz. butter 1-2 tbsp. Cointreau or Grand Marnier 1 qt. large ripe strawberries, longstemmed if possible

Place the chocolate, cream, butter and Cointreau or Grand Marnier in a bowl over a pan of gently simmering water and leave until the chocolate and butter have melted. Stir until mixed together and transfer to a small fondue bowl over a lit fondue heater. Wash the strawberries and pat dry. Holding on to the stalks, dip them into the fondue.

Note: You can grill the pears and bake off the bread strips the night before.

Michael Meade studied at the Culinary Institute of America in Hyde Park, New York, worked at Jack’s Oyster House in Albany and is currently sous-chef for Thunder Mountain Curry in Troy. Send questions or comments to Mmeade1215@aol.com

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. H e r e ’ s G u f f ma n

by

Patric k Wh ite

My Capital Region Theater Gratitude List

It’s always a good time to make a gratitude list so at this halfway mark in the Capital Region’s ’13-’14 theater season let me take stock of all we have as we continue to grow and thrive.

1. The sheer size, variety and scope of theatrical offerings in the Capital Region is fantastic. From the multi-million

dollar “Book of Mormon” arriving in March to sell out Proctors’ 2500 seats for 8 performances to the playwright’s showcases popping up at more and more organizations where first timers are introduced to the pleasures and demands of stagecraft there’s something for every interest and skill level. Whether you are an aspiring actor, playwright, director or most importantly and interested patron there are numerous performances and auditions every week in the Capital Region all year long.

2. The vivid personality of our local theatrical houses.

From the technical mastery regularly and consistently on display at Capital Rep to the capacity crowds of community support at the Sand Lake Center for the Arts every organization I can think of in the Capital Region has a distinctive and cheering character all its own before the performance ever begins. I can close my eyes and just think

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about the fun provided within the walls of The Ghent Playhouse, SLOC, ACT, Home Made at The Little Theatre, Carol’s curtain speech at Curtain Call, free coffee at intermission served by plenty of volunteers at SCP, the cake raffle at Blue Roses Theatre Company. Before you ever encounter the script you know you’re in for a good time when you’ve planned a night out to our theatres.

4. The chance to see local talent grow and shine.

You can follow your favorite performers in role after role in a variety of different and challenging pieces because we have so many venues. It is possible to keep very busy indeed. I could name dozens of performers who by dint of their committed regimen now have the chops to be professionals in any of the larger cities with more opportunities. The Capital Region has proven itself to be a fertile training ground for our teenagers becoming polished pros like Charles and George Franklin, Jack Mastrianni and Cathryn Salamone who have all made the recent move from local stages to the Great White Way.

3. The affordability.

Our theater is the greatest bargain for a night out. Did you know you can get half price Rush tickets 10 minutes before curtain at Capital Rep? Every organization has the opportunity to volunteer allowing you to take in the show for free in exchange for your talents as a set builder or just ticket ripper. The face value of most of the community’s tickets are competitive with movie prices and let’s face it we all know theater is the original 3D entertainment.

5. What’s next? The rest of the season promises more excitement as we look forward to “Figaro,” “Gypsy,” ”Great Expectations,” “The Grapes of Wrath,” “Young Frankenstein” and many more. There’s always something new with groups forming and producing every year. Spring also brings the announcement of next season’s schedules which to me is better than Christmas. Here’s hoping you discover the joys of Capital Region theater on your own and start your gratitude list with every trip to our theatres. Go see a show…and thanks for reading. Patrick White is a Capital Region actor who is performing in “Good People” at Curtain Call Theatre thru February 8 and will be in “Spring Awakening” at UAlbany February 27th thru March 8th.


T he F a sh io n abl e a nd the Fri vo lo us

by

Alan Ben n ett Ilag an

Wear’s the Party Worried about what to wear when invited to a party with a unique dress code, such as the Gay Soiree? Alan has some pointers:

Nothing strikes greater terror into the hearts of some party-going people as the creative-funky-formal invite (such as befits The Gay Soirée – the social event of the winter season). I myself have been guilty of such paradoxical party wardrobe demands of guests, and it often put certain guests into a tizzy. Even when you spell out attire requests for private parties, there will always be those people who won’t play the game. But for those who want to partake, and those who put in the effort, it helps to have some guidelines and parameters. First, know the scene. Is this a formal wedding or a Friday night bowling league after-party? That will be the first and most important clue as to how to dress to impress in an appropriate manner. Talk with the hosts or other people who may be in-the-know. Float a few ideas you had and gauge whether your vision will match what they had in mind. Unless it’s your own party, you really should honor the wishes of the person putting it on. Second, plan ahead. The absolute worst thing a person can do when deciding what to wear for an event is procrastinate. Many of the most horrible fashion mistakes have been made when deciding at the last instant what to put on.

(Some pretty nifty accidents have been hatched in the same way, but it’s far riskier, and the success rate is much lower.) There’s no time to allow for alterations (which is often what makes a stunning outfit in the end) and no room to decide if you really like it. The most beautiful suit or gown in the world isn’t worth a thing if it doesn’t work on your own body. Not only fit and style-wise, but on an emotional level as well, the outfit must work in every way. Assuming that because you love something on the hanger you will love it on yourself is a most dangerous game. Third, in addition to trying on your outfit well in advance, take a few photographs with and without a flash. Trust me, as vain and silly as it may sound, this may make a difference for the rest of your life. I’m talking especially to those ladies who may or may not be wearing a bra: sometimes a flash makes what looks safe and solid in person utterly sheer and see-through in a photo. I’ve even seen thick sweaters reveal aureolae under the unforgiving light of a flash. In today’s world of ubiquitous photo-ops, opt for safe rather than sorry. The last thing you want to be remembered for is the tragic nipple shot in a framed wedding photo on your best friend’s mantle.

Fourth, don’t under-do it. While this may seem like the safest bet, and it is, anyone fun enough to issue a creative/ funky/formal attire edict is hoping to be wowed and bowled over by the originality and thought put into a suitablydazzling wardrobe. When I’ve thrown parties that request a certain mode of dress, I’m always grateful when people rise to the challenge. Far from feeling overshadowed or bothered when someone outdoes me outfit-wise (and it has happened on at least two wonderfully memorable occasions), I love when people take a theme and turn it into their own fabulous moment. (The only time one may want to hesitate and consider not going overboard would be a wedding – unless it’s your own wedding.) Finally, have fun with it. Fashion is serious business for some of us, but it can also be fun for all. A funky attire invitation is an opportunity to try something different and daring, while putting your own spin on party wear. {For a fine opportunity to hone your creative-funky-formal wear at a fabulous event, please join us at The Gay Soirée ~ details in this issue of Community.} Alan Bennett Ilagan is a freelance writer and amateur photographer who resides in upstate New York with his husband Andy. He created the website www.ALANILAGAN.com, which contains a repository of his work, as well as a daily blog; the website recently celebrated its tenth anniversary online. He was the manager of the Romaine Brooks Gallery from 2008 to 2012. His writing has appeared in Instinct, xy magazine, Capitalmen, Q Northeast, the Windy City Times, and the Boston Phoenix. Notable artistic collaborations have been created with the likes of Steven Underhill, Paul Richmond, Dennis Dean, and Michael Breyette.

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31


For issue released in October Dedicated to inclusiveness & social justice for the LGBT Community

First United Presbyterian Church 1915 Fifth Ave., Troy 12180 272-2771

10 AM Sunday Service Check our web site: www.unitedprestroy.org Rainbow flags in the sanctuary & outside

For issue released in November

Try us out for the holidays!

First United Presbyterian Church A congregation dedicated to inclusiveness & social justice for the LGBT Community

1915 Fifth Ave., Troy 12180, 272-2771 10 AM Sunday Service Check our website for Advent & Christmas Eve Services: www.unitedprestroy.org

32 For issue released in December/January


ASK MARK YOUR TAX QUESTIONS Dear Mark D Witecki, We are a same sex couple married in 2011 in New York. We live in New York. We file in New York. We are mad at DOMA because now we are paying MORE taxes instead of less. However , it’s worth the rights and benefits. Here’s the question. For the last two years we have given charitable contributions to a local charity and we just found out that the charity lost its nonprofit status in 2012. We deducted it on our tax returns. What should we do? Should we get a letter from the charity? Sign us, What to Do and When Dear What to Do and When, First, how do you know the charity lost its non- profit status? The IRS has a list of charities on its website whose status has been suspended. Have you contacted the charity? What does the charity say? If you have satisfactory proof that its status was revoked, check out the exact date in 2012 when it was revoked. If your contributions were BEFORE the revocation date, no problem. If your contributions were AFTER the revocation date, you need to amend any filed returns affected. ==============================

Dear Mr. Witecki,

My spouse and I were married in Canada in 2010 and are New York residents. We are both male and in 2011 I sold a piece of land to my spouse because it reminded me of someone I once knew but he wanted it because it was a good investment but I paid a large capital gain tax because we were considered strangers by the IRS and not a real family. Is there anything we can do now? Signed, Landing in Land Dear Landing in Land,

by

amend your 2011 tax returns because of the recent Supreme Court ruling. You do not HAVE to amend them, but can choose to do so. A sale of land from one spouse to another generally does not result in any capital gain. However, the saving of the capital gains tax may be offset by loss of other deductions or higher tax rates. You should calculate the amendment and see if there is an overall savings. Also, the pre-anti-DOMA ruling tax return amendments are not required. They are discretionary. You may find that you want to amend just the Federal, or just New York State or both. You also don’t say where the land is. If the land was in a state other than New York you may have capital gains in the state where the land is. If the state is one that did not recognize same sex marriage at the time the land was sold and still does not recognize it, then that return may not be amended. If you never filed a return in the first place in that state, then you should file an original return in the non recognition state. If that is the case, there may be a resident credit against the New York State tax returns for the taxes due to that state. You also don’t say if you already amended any of your tax returns. Feel free to contact me with any further questions. ==============================

Dear Mark,

I hired a painter to paint one of my rental properties. The painter charged me sales tax on the work done. I previously did some minor painting myself on my properties but on this property the entire building had to be painted. What gives?

Mark D. Witecki Dear Frustrated, Generally the repainting of a building is sales taxable unless the entity being provided the painting services was tax exempt or part of a much larger renovation. If the painting was new construction , then the job would not have been taxable in any event. Answers that apply to specific taxpayers may not necessary apply to others. Changes in tax law and rules may affect answers given at any point. You can write Mark at Mark Witecki CPA CFP(R) CFE, 3701 State St, Schenectady, NY 12304 Mark D. Witecki specializes in small businesses and professional individuals. Mr. Witecki has a B. S. in Accounting from S. U. N. Y. Albany and an M. S. in Accounting from Syracuse University. Mark D. Witecki is a Certified Public Accountant, CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER ™ practitioner, Certified Fraud Examiner, Certified College Planning Specialist and is admitted to practice before the United States Tax Court. Certified Financial Planner Board of Standards Inc. owns the certification marks CFP® , CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER™ and federally registered CFP (with flame design) in the U.S., which it awards to individuals who successfully complete CFP Board’s initial and ongoing certification requirements. Mark’s office is located at 3701 State Street, Schenectady, New York and contacted at 346-4000.

Sign me, Frustrated.

If you have not already done so, you can

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Welcoming Congregations

Join Us In Exploring Your Spiritual Side At One Of The Welcoming Congregations Below: Community Congregational Church (UCC) 221 Columbia Tpke, Rensselaer, NY www.clintonheightsucc.org Community Reformed Church of Colonie 701 Sand Creek Road, Colonie, NY www.coloniereformed.org (518)869-5589 Congregation Agudat Achim (Conservative) 2117 Union Street, Schenectady, NY www.agudatachim.org (518) 393-9211 Congregation B’nai Shalom (Reform) 420 Whitehall Road, Albany, NY www.bnaishalom.albany.ny.us (518) 482-5283 Congregation Berith Shalom (Reform) 167 Third Street, Troy, NY www.berithshalom.com (518)272-8872 Congregation Beth Emeth (Reform) 100 Academy Road, Albany, NY www.bethemethalbany.org (518)436-9761 Congregation Gates of Heaven (Reform) 842 Ashmore Avenue, Schenectady, NY www.cgoh.org (518)374-8173 Congregation Ohav Shalom (Conservative) 113 New Krumkill Road, Albany, NY www.ohavshalom.org Congregation Temple Sinai (Reform) 509 Broadway, Saratoga Springs, NY www.templesinai-saratogasprings.org (518) 584-8730 Eastern Parkway United Methodist Church 943 Palmer Avenue, Schenectady, NY www.easternparkway.weebly.com (518)374-4306 St George’s Episcopal Church 30 North Ferry St., Schenectady www.stgeorgesschenectady.org Emmanuel Baptist Church 275 State Street, Albany, NY www.emmanuelalbany.net (518)465-5161

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First Church in Albany 110 North Pearl Street, Albany, NY www.firstchurchinalbany.org (518)463-4449

Good Shepherd Lutheran Church 501 Albany Shaker Road, Loudonville, NY www.goodshepherdchurchloudonville.org (518)458-1562

First Congregational Church of Albany UCC & NACCC 405 Quail Street, Albany, NY www.firstcongregationalalbany.org / (518)482-4580

Holy Trinity National Catholic Church 405 Washington Avenue, Albany, NY www.NCCofA.org/holytrin.html (518)434-8861

First Lutheran Church 181 Western Avenue, Albany, NY www.FirstLutheranAlbany.org (518)463-1326 First Presbyterian Church 362 State Street, Albany, NY www.firstpresalbany.org (518)449-7332 First Reformed Church 8 North Church Street, Schenectady, NY www.1streformed.com First Unitarian Society of Schenectady 1221 Wendell Avenue, Schenectady, NY www.fussonline.org (518)374-4446 First Unitarian Universalist Society of Albany 405 Washington Avenue, Albany, NY www.albanyuu.org (518)463-7135 First United Methodist Church 603 State Street, Schenectady, NY www.gbgm-umc.org/schenectady (518)374-4403 First United Presbyterian Church 1915 Fifth Avenue, Troy, NY www.unitedprestroy.org (518)272-2771 Friends Meeting (Quaker) 727 Madison Avenue, Albany, NY (518) 436-8812

Journey United Church of Christ 500 Kenwood Blvd, Delmar , NY www.journeyucc.com Saratoga Springs United Methodist Church 175 Fifth Avenue, Saratoga Springs, NY www.saratogaspringsumc.org / (518)5843720 Saint Aelred’s Priory and Retreat House (National Catholic) 670 Bunker Hill Road Northville, NY Tel. 518-863-8086 or 518-434-8861 staelredpriory@aol.com St. Andrews Episcopal Church Main at Madison Avenue, Albany, NY www.standrewsalbany.org / (518)489-4747 St. John’s Lutheran Church 160 Central Avenue, Albany, NY www.stjohnsalbany.org (518)465-7545 Unitarian Universalist Congregation of Saratoga 624 North Broadway, Saratoga Springs, NY www.saratoga-uu.org (518)584-1555 Unity Church in Albany 21 King Avenue, Albany, NY www.unitychurchinalbany.org (518)4533603 Woodstock Jewish Congregation (Reconstructionist) 1682 Glasco Turnpike, Woodstock, NY www.wjcshul.org (845)246-1671

Proud To Be Open! Affirming! Welcoming! Joyous!


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We’re Proud to Support These Businesses as They Support the LGBT Community Members as of November 1, 2013

AIDS Council of Northeast New York Athos Restaurant Bombers Schenectady Broughton Properties/ Keller Williams Realty Buenau's Opticians Central Avenue BID Charles F. Lucas Confectionery and Wine Bar Connections Psychotherapy Consumer Optical Crisafulli Bros.Plumbing & Heating Contractors, Inc Customericity, LLC Deja Vu GayAlbanyOnline.com Geri Pomerantz, Esq Grappa '72 Ristorante Hokkaido Albany

Interim HealthCare James W. Leone, State Farm Agent Janet Stein, JMS PSB, LLC Joseph Dalton / Prudential Manor Homes Joseph Roche Journey United Church of Christ L&P Media Latimer/Stroud, LLP Mark D. Witecki, CPA CFP CFE Ronnie Mangione / Merrill Lynch Security Plumbing & Heating Supply Skylands Services, INC Steve Cook / State Farm Insurance Sunrise Management and Consulting The Point Restaurant Thomas J. Walling/Tower Square Securities, Inc. Tri City Rentals

Don’t Miss The Region’s Fastest Growing LGBT Professionals Networking Mixer: Our Business Alliance mixers have quickly become one of the most anticipated and popular Pride Center events— and are only getting bigger. If you haven’t joined us yet, make plans now for our upcoming mixers! Come and meet up with friends, distribute your business cards, enjoy some light fare and cocktails while making important business contacts. UPCOMING NETWORKING MIXERS: Monday Feb 10th 6-8pm Northeastern Fine Jewelry 1575 Western Ave, Albany

For More Information or To Join Visit:

www.capitalpridecenter.org/resources/business-alliance/

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Monday Mar 10th 6-8pm Aperitivo Bostro 1575 Western Ave, Alba-


QFEST 2014 FEB 27 – MAR 2

4TH ANNUAL LGBTQ FILM FESTIVAL Buy a Festival Pass $40 • Single movies $9, students $6 All films will be shown in the GE Theatre with celebrations and discussions taking place between films. THURSDAY • FEBRUARY 27 6PM

XANADU sing-a-long with ICFS

FRIDAY • FEBRUARY 28 6PM

I AM DIVINE

8PM

BLUE IS THE WARMEST COLOR

SATURDAY • MARCH 1 2PM

G.B.F.

4PM

FAGBUG NATION

6PM

FIVE DANCES

8PM

LITTLE BI PEEP

SUNDAY • MARCH 2 2PM

WEST HOLLYWOOD MOTEL

4PM

WHO’S AFRAID OF VAGINA WOLF?

6PM

OFFICIAL OSCAR VIEWING PARTY!!!!! - Free Admission

432 State Street • Schenectady • NY • Box Office • 518.346.6204 • proctors.org

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NON-PROFIT US POSTAGE

P AID PERMIT #798 ALBANY, NY

332 Hudson Avenue Albany, NY 12210

Be with us! Tri City Rentals is a proud supporter of the LGBT community Visit one of our 24 Fine Capital District Apartment Communities

We want to thank the for choosing us as this year’s business of the year!

www.TriCityRentals.com

518.862.6600


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