CommUNITY Magazine (vol 1 iss 9) by Pride Center of the Capital Region

Honorary Co-Chairs

Mona Golub and Marie DeBrocky Invite you to a special evening celebrating our community and your community center! For their remarkable support of the LGBT community, please join us in congratulating: Robb Ganns, Community Service Award Albany Police Chief Steven Krokoff, Nancy Burton Straight But Not Narrow Award Mike Chapman, Volunteer of the Year Award Tri City Rentals, Business of the Year Award Jamison Carlen, Paul Postiglione Youth Services Award Gwen Wright, Libby Post Council Leadership Award Nora Yates, recipient of our highest honor, the Harvey Milk Award On October 18th, 2013, the Pride Center of the Capital Region will honor the great achievements of this distinguished group at our Annual Gala. The Gala is the premier Pride Center event, bringing together community leaders, friends and allies. Please congratulate our award recipients, buy your tickets today!

Tickets Now Available Online: www.capitalpridecenter.org

Century House, Latham NY |Friday, October 18th 6:00 pm Cocktail Reception | 7:00 Dinner & Awards Sponsored by:

L. Jeffrey Baltes & Gene Knapp

Message

from the

Vice-President

It is said that the United States is one of the few countries where volunteerism is an integral part of our culture. Yet, in a recent review of volunteerism in America, I discovered a rather sobering statistic that in our state, we New Yorkers rank LAST among all 50 states for our level of volunteering!!

By Pat Wood, Second Vice-President

Wow… Not exactly the type of recognition we can be terribly proud of … But, at least 60% of us do favors for neighbors, so that counts for something, right?

of volunteers who keep the Center moving forward. Together we HAVE made a difference – and we all need to sustain and deepen that commitment in the future.

Our Pride Center is a great example of volunteerism in action. In this edition of CommUnity, we highlight individuals being honored for their volunteer service. Let us never forget that our Pride Center would not be in existence without volunteers who made the commitment to establish and financially support our Center over the past four decades. What a remarkable achievement! Think of how many places across our country lack the resources of a thriving LGBT Center like ours... How lucky we are that local volunteers saw the need to our Center a reality. And now in 2013, how lucky we are to have a dedicated pool

When asked why people don’t volunteer, they cite “lack of time’ and “no one asked me.” Please consider this my “ask” to you – please volunteer your time and talents to our Pride Center. Contact our Executive Director Curran Streett (cstreett@capitalpridecenter.org) to get more information on how you can take part in our exciting Pride Center volunteer world.

have made a difference. As the 30th year of our youth program comes to a close, you should be feeling so proud.

youth being recognized with the Paul Postiglione Youth Services Award. At 13, Carlen donated his Bar Mitzvah money to the Pride Center because he wanted to support LGBT youth. As a victim of bullying, he knows intimately the challenges youth in the LGBT community face. Another, Nora Yates, is a former youth program participant, and is now honored with the Harvey Milk Award, the highest award given for her long standing leadership in the LGBT community.

Director’s Note by Curran Streett, Executive Director

Dear community member, Your dedication and support to the Pride Center over the years has made our youth program possible. Because you are a part of the Pride Center family, you have saved countless lives, you have fostered an easier coming out process for LGBT youth, you

Because of you, youth in our community have more support, education and leadership opportunities than ever before. Because of you, the program is bigger than ever. Because of you, the Pride Center’s garden level space is being renovated to become more inviting. Because of you, the first ever LGBT youth camp welcomed youth from all over the Capital Region giving them a life changing experience. On October 18th, we will be highlighting the achievements, leadership and dedication of seven award recipients, and celebrating this landmark year for the Pride Center’s youth program. One of those award recipients, Jamison Carlen, is making history as the first ever

From The Editor’s Desk -

Philanthropy- The effort or inclination to increase the well-being of human-

By Michael Weidrich,

commUNITY

kind, as by charitable aid or donations. Anybody can be a philanthropist. You don’t have to be rich to be a philanthropist. The 3 T’s of philanthropy are Time, Talent and Treasure and the Pride Center is the beneficiary of all of these in abundance. We have so many wonderful volunteers who share their time with us, from staffing Café to volunteering at Pride to stuffing envelopes. We have amazing people who give their talent and sit on our committees to review our finances, help us raise money, write for our publications, and facilitate

We volunteer because it is important, it makes us proud and it makes a huge difference. Please lend your name to our list of volunteers– and take an active part in our Pride Center history!

Through your involvement, you have made these achievements possible. I hope we will be celebrating with you on October 18th, and thank you for the gift of keeping our youth program thriving for 30 years! Sincerely, Curran

Editor our youth groups. And lastly we have all of your super donors who contribute their hard earned treasure to the Center to help us maintain our daily operations, sponsor our programs, help renovate our building, and give scholarships to very deserving youth. In taking stock of all the people who support the Pride Center, we are overwhelmed by the depth of commitment of all our philanthropists. We say ‘thank you’ for your support and recognize all of you for your philanthropy. You ALL deserve awards! 5

Welcome Back

School!

Welcome back to school everyone! Can you believe it? It’s October, and we’re already speeding ahead with a lot of NEW things in store for our Center Youth program. This year, we are excited to be offering three youth groups for lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans*, queer, questioning, and allied youth (ages 13-18), a mental health and wellness group for young people (ages 16-24), plus a ton of fun social and advocacy events throughout the year to keep folks busy! One of the main goals of our Center Youth program is to engage with schools throughout the ten counties we serve, to support and empower teachers, faculty, administrators, but especially students in creating safer schools for everyone. During the 2013-2014 school year, our Center Youth program visited over 50 middle schools and high schools throughout the Capital Region, from gay-straight alliances, diversity clubs, faculty meetings, and student councils to provide training on how to support LGBTQ youth in their schools. We’ve already been hard at work getting in touch with schools to checkin with them about their efforts! In September alone, we met with at least one GSA from each of the 10 counties we serve. For October, we’re hoping to double that number and visit schools we haven’t yet been to, especially in rural communities that don’t have many or any, LGBTQ-related resources for youth to access. Besides school visits, we’ve also been hard at work recruiting LGBTQ and ally youth leaders for our Center Youth Action Team, which is designed to

By James Shultis, Youth Program Coordinator

encourage youth leadership, contradict myths and stereotypes of LGBTQ youth, and create positive representations of the LGBTQ and allied community. The Center Youth Action Team conducts trainings for schools, organizations, and community groups throughout the Capital Region and provides youth with a variety of ways to engage in leadership and advocacy opportunities. We’re expanding the team to include 15 positions this year, so get ready to meet them! They’re going to be a great bunch of very diverse young people with a lot of stories to tell! So while I have your attention, here are some important dates to put on your calendar if you haven’t already… Fall 2013 Dates National Anti-Bullying Month: October GSA Network Event: Thursday, October 3rd, 4:30-6PM @ Pride Center National Coming Out Day: Friday, October 11th Ally Week: October 21st—25th Trans Day of Remembrance: Wednesday, November 20th Winter/Spring 2014 Dates No Name-Calling Week: 20th—24th

January

National Day of Silence: Friday, April 11th (The Breaking the Silence event is at The Egg, Albany) Equality & Justice Day: Tuesday, April 29th @ Empire State Plaza Alternative Prom: Stay tuned for a date, it’s in June! Capital Pride Parade & Festival (AND Youth March): Sunday, June 8th @ Washington Park, Albany Here’s a list of our regular Center Youth program happenings: LGBTQA Youth Groups These drop-in peer groups are designed for lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans*, queer, questioning & ally (LGBTQA) youth

ages 13-18 throughout the Capital Region. Through education, support, activities and guidance, this program provides a safe & empowering space to ALL youth. We have three different locations they meet including ALBANY, every Friday from 7-8:30pm @ Pride Center (332 Hudson Avenue); SCHENECTADY, every Thursday from 6-7:30pm @ Proctors Theater, Underground Space, (432 State Street); and SARATOGA, please stay tuned for more info about this NEW group! Starting soon! THRIVE Group A therapist-led, mental health and wellness group for LGBTQ young adults ages 16-24, This group will focus on social interaction and progressive health. Meets for 10 week cycles on Thursdays. Please be in touch with Lauren Ford, our Mental Health Specialist for more info lford@ capitalpridecenter.org CONNECT: Supporting Parents & Families of LGBTQ Youth For parents, friends & allies of LGBTQ youth to connect with one another. Meetings are every 2nd Friday of the month @ the Pride Center from 7-8:30pm. Contact our Youth Program Coordinator for more details (contact info at bottom of article). We also have another group called Capital Region Support Group for Parents & Families of LGBT People that meets at the First Unitarian Universalist Society of Schenectady every 2nd Tuesday of the month at 7pm. Please contact Julia Helfman at 518-372-9911. Be sure to check out the rest of what’s happening with our Center Youth program by visiting us on our website, friending our Center Youth program on Facebook (PrideCenterYouth) or contacting me, the Pride Center’s Youth Program Coordinator at 462.6138 or jshultis@capitalpridecenter.org Have a happy and healthy school year, and if you’re able, get involved with our Center Youth program, it’s a blast! James Shultis

School Thoughts

By Cody Concepcion, Troy High School The first days of school can be stressful for anyone, but I think the stress level can be much higher for LGBT youth. As the only openly trans* person in my high school, I worry a lot. Not only because it is new to the other students, but because it is new to the faculty and staff as well. I constantly worry that my teachers will mess up with my name and pronouns. Sometimes they do, but it happens and you just have to let it go

and move on. I’m glad that my peers in my school’s GSA have my back! I’m super excited to start meetings and get the group to expand! I’m also excited to see what we have in store for ally week! The first few days can be a little rough, but I know that this school year is gonna be awesome!

Getting Involved with the Center Youth Program & Reflections on Coming Out By Eric Snyder

from

Averill High School process. My community isn’t openly homophobic, but when the best thing that can happen right now is nothing, it’s hard not to think of a bad outcome. My hope is that everyone will be too busy with college applications this fall to actually give a damn. Speaking of which, can we just have a moment of silence for every teenager currently going through the application process right now? I think we could all use it. Thanks.

without having to find the box you fit in. But I completely forgot that that is something people actually care about. Like, that’s exactly the reason why coming out sucks, because people care so much about what you are. So where do I go from here? By the looks of my schedule, probably where everyone else is going – home to get some work done. Senior year really feels different from the rest of school. It used to be that all I wanted was to perform well so I could run off to a good school after my four years here. Somewhere where I would never have to see anyone I knew before. That’s still pretty much the case, but after this summer, it’s kind of hard thinking about leaving it all behind.

It’s like when you’re at home and you hear a tornado warning on the TV or radio or whatever, and then you’re Anyways, it’s a real culture shock to be just stuck inside all night watching coming back to “the real world” after for something to happen. Not that you having a rather carefree summer. What want a tornado, but the monotonous I mean is, I went to the Pride Center’s waiting for disaster to strike has you YOUTH IN POWER: Summer on edge. Anticipation is a killer. When Leadership Camp, the whole time we I came out over the summer, I went were never asked to claim an identity. through pretty much the same thought You could just be who you wanted Pride By Zach Ocascio (aka DJ Hydroponic X5) from Tamarac High School Pride, Is the essence of my life. Pride, Is something dear to Me. It shows the wonders of my life, And brings back memories. The fact is I am full of this pride— I am proud to be gay, I am proud to be a brother, I am proud to be 16, And proud to be someone That someone is Me.

It didn’t used to be this way, Where everyone was— Kind, Accepting, and Tolerant But you can’t blame them. Cause you can only be you, And I can only be Me. Someday, I want to be proud of The music I make, The smiles I put on a person’s face... But nothing makes Me happier than

The fans that I have brought, And the love of my music. Plus the fans that listen to it, Is not something to be forgotten. Truth is teacher— I am not infallible, I make mistakes, And take risks, But I am human, Just like You. And though your pride is not full of rainbow You are very similar to Me.

The Pride Center

welcomes

MSW Intern Jurrian Craig

Hello everyone, my name is Jurrian Craig, and I am one of the SUNY Albany Masters level Social Work interns that will be interning with the Pride Center of the Capital Region this academic year. I am very excited about the opportunity and look forward to working with the Pride Center.

ence working as a clinician for the Center Support program and I also look forward to assisting this agency with administrative tasks and planning for success in the future. I am also looking forward to co-facilitating the Rainbow Nights youth group in Schenectady!

I am a graduate of the University of New Orleans where I received a Bachelor of Arts in Sociology with a minor in History. During my undergraduate career I enjoyed focusing on subjects such as racial issues, gender issues, social stratification, and New Orleans history. I am a Capital Region native, and in the spring of 2009 I moved back to this area to be closer to my family and enroll in graduate school. In the fall of 2010 I enrolled in the Masters of Social Work program at SUNY Albany as a part time student. I am now beginning my fourth and final year as a graduate student and I am looking forward to spending this year working with the Pride Center! During this internship I hope to gain experi-

I have a wide variety of experience which includes working as a case manager for adults with intellectual disabilities at a local non-profit agency since this past February. Before I accepted that position I worked for 4 years in supported employment as an Employment Specialist assisting individuals with intellectual and psychiatric disabilities to obtain and maintain integrated community employment. At my previous MSW internship I was assigned to work at a local department of probation where I worked with ex-offenders in the Mental Health Court system of New York State as well as registered sex offenders. I addition to professional experience I have many years of retail experience “under my

The Fashionable

Frivolous: Giving Up

By Alan Bennett Ilagan

and the

the

Yet there are dangers in getting stuck in a rut, drawbacks to growing stale, and it’s not merely about getting dull and boring and predictable.

“Fashion’s not about looking back. It’s always about looking forward.” - Anna Wintour While Anna Wintour is right about almost everything, her steadfast refusal to modify or change up her iconic bangs-and-bob hairstyle is a slight misstep. Obviously, staying true to one signature look is what makes it iconic, but the ability to transform and try new things is a basic tenet of all powerful fashion. Many of us tend to find a style we like, and then wear it out to death. Whether it’s a favorite pair of jeans, or a sentimental black sweater, or the perfume we were given when we were fifteen and just kept buying over and over and over, we are largely crea tures of custom and habit. It’s comfortable to stick with what you know, easier to keep what is safer and has always worked in the past.

For instance, one of the cardinal rules about wearing a fragrance is that one is supposed to change it out every few months. You can always return to it down the line, especially if it’s a favorite, but when you wear the same scent for months and years at a time, your ability to detect its strength diminishes. Such olfactory immunity results in people who douse themselves in cologne or perfume (and usually the most wretched and offensive kind) and then before you know it the whole stinking (literally) office has acute asthma. The same phenomenon occurs with most shampoos. If you continually use the same brand, eventually your hair gets accustomed to it. There’s nothing to shake things up and add a new sheen – the same chemicals and oils are doing the same thing, building up and potentially leaving hair lifeless and dull. If you’ve ever tried a new shampoo after years of the same, you’ll know what I’m talking about. It can be a revelation. I’m not saying to run out and buy all new grooming products – I’m just saying that maybe the next time you run out of Suave, you can give Finesse a shot. This philosophy of changing things up also holds true for fashion. I see it all the time: someone finds comfort and stability in a certain look, and then that’s all they think they can wear. Maybe they were told they looked good in something, maybe they read a piece

belt.” I enjoy working (when I have time!) at a liquor store owned by my father. In my spare time I love spending time outside, visiting with friends and family, and traveling. I love to camp, hike, bike ride, and go roller-skating. I like going to the movies. I also enjoy reading for pleasure, although it has become difficult to find time to do this during the school year. I am a coffee addict and if you ever have the pleasure of working with me before noon you will most likely see a coffee mug attached to my hand. I love music and dancing and I will listen to just about anything – although, don’t ask me questions about artists and song titles because I am not good at remembering them! Jurrian is one of three new social work interns to join the Pride Center team this fall. Check out our November and December issues of CommUNITY to meet MSW Intern Liz Mills and BSW Intern Melanie Karmazyn.

Ghost of advice in a magazine, and suddenly it’s all they know how to do. Often it’s just a tendency to favor certain colors – like black. Yes, black is slimming, yes, black is classic, but black can also be incredibly boring. Yet if you take a break from it, step into something more colorful for a while, when you go back to black it can seem like a reinvigorating jolt. Sometimes absence makes the heart grow fonder. A few weeks away from your favorite fragrance or shampoo will make your return to it that much more enjoyable. It’s a way of keeping the excitement alive, and rediscovering what made you love something in the first place. Alan Bennett Ilagan is a freelance writer and amateur photographer who resides in upstate New York with his husband Andy. He created the website www.ALANILAGAN.com, which contains a repository of his work, as well as a daily blog; the website recently celebrated its tenth anniversary online. He was the manager of the Romaine Brooks Gallery from 2008 to 2012. His writing has appeared in Instinct, xy magazine, Capitalmen, Q Northeast, the Windy City Times, and the Boston Phoenix. Notable artistic collaborations have been created with the likes of Steven Underhill, Paul Richmond, Dennis Dean, and Michael Breyette.

Honoring

the

Extraordinary!

Michael Weidrich, CommUNITY Editor

For over 30 years, the Pride Center of the Capital Region has been honoring extraordinary people, organizations and businesses that have made a significant difference in our community. This year we are celebrating the work of 7 extraordinary awardees and the contributions they have made to betterment of the LGBT community of the Capital Region.

C ommunity S ervice A ward

Given to an individual or organization that has demonstrated outstanding community service within the LGBT community.

Robb Ganns

Robb has been member of the community for 20 years now. He started out playing board games and volunteering in the cafe. Now Robb is the President of OBK. After fighting for Marriage Equality at the Senate, he will celebrate his 2 Anniversary this September with his husband Jason. “Our Community is capable of doing so many great things, the hard part is getting people to understand they can make a difference. “ “I think working with LGBT Community is very important because there are new people coming out every day.”

Nancy Burton Straight But Not Narrow Award

Given to a straight member of the community whom demonstrates outstanding leadership and support of the LGBT community.

Albany Police Chief Steven Krokoff

Steven Krokoff was appointed Chief of Police in 2010, having risen up through the ranks from when he joined the Albany Police Department in 1993. As the leader of one of the largest police departments in New York, Chief Krokoff has taken a progressive approach to law enforcement. Under his leadership, the Albany Police Department continues to break down historical social barriers with complete dedication to a communitycentered model. He has redirected efforts toward a holistic methodology where service providers round out a team approach to seek out root causes and contributing factors of problems. Krokoff recognized the need to regain the hearts and minds of both the Department and the community. To that end, he has re-engineered police responses to crime by recruiting the public as full partners in the promotion of neighborhood safety. The creation of the Neighborhood Engagement Unit and the evolution towards neighborhood policing teams will continue to implement his vision. "The issue here, when it comes to law enforcement, you must be progressive to be successful."

Volunteer of the Year

Given to an individual who has demonstrated outstanding service as a Pride Center volunteer in the past year.

Mike Chapman

“I consider myself to be a private kind of person who believes in helping others and giving back. Hence I don't care to talk about myself, but rather let my actions speak for my character. It is my privilege to be associated with the Pride Center. Being greatly appreciated for helping so many great people is just a bonus in life. "The best part about volunteering is you will never be fired, you won't ever get a raise, you will not be promoted anytime soon, but most of all it is the best paying job you could ever ask for. You ‘give back’ the karma comes back ten fold" "So many people do so much for the Pride Center on a volunteer basis it's great to be recognized for helping people in the community."

Business of the Year

Given to a business for its outstanding support of the LGBT Community.

Tri City Rentals

For over 40 years, we have owned and managed the area’s premier apartment communities. Currently we offer 24 of the finest Capital Region apartment communities, with a variety of locations and amenities sure to fit everyone’s lifestyle. Attention to detail is the first thing you will notice as you enter any of our communities and there’s a neighborhood feeling you’ll get the moment you meet the members of our staff. We have built a reputation for Unsurpassed Quality, Outstanding Value and Personal Service. We are constantly seeking ways to improve the quality of life in our neighborhood apartment communities and the partnership through the Capital District Pride Center has allowed us to show just how PROUD we are of our community. We are honored to be the recipients of the 2013 Business of the Year Award and look forward to serving YOU, our community, for years to come! "The staff at our communities and main offices know we're involved with the Pride Center and they should be providing a comfortable and accepting community for everyone to live, no matter their sexual orientation."

Paul Postiglione Youth Services Award

Given to an individual who has worked to improve the lives of LGBT youth.

Jamison Carlen

“My name is Jamison Carlen. I am fifteen years old and I live with my wonderful mama, my stepdad and my six siblings in Troy, New York. I am a student at Tech Valley High School and am going into my second year there. It is a great school and has given me a lot of really great opportunities. One of them was when I was nominated with a group of five students from my school to attend something called the Hoby Leadership Program. It was a really great experience. I learned a lot of things about being a strong leader and we had a lot of fun partly because they gave us a lot of candy, but mostly because the staff running the program were so inspiring. They showed us so much about being a leader, that the next day, I could tell how much better of I leader I was for my project groups at school. I have been playing the guitar for my whole life, and am interested in car mechanics, and I like building things. Someday, I hope to be a mechanical engineer.” "I'm just really happy that I can help the LGBT community."

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Cello music for your special occasion and/or private cello lessons, by Will Hayes, cellist (518) 242-0561 will.cellist@gmail.com www.willthecellist.com

Libby Post Council Leadership Award

Given to a former Pride Center board member who defined leadership. Gwen Wright

Recently appointed, Gwen Wright is the Executive Director of the NYS Office for the Prevention of Domestic Violence. Ms Wright has been with the Office for 20 years and has served in many capacities, most recently as Director of Human Services and Prevention. She has supervised training and policy programs in the areas of child welfare, social services and public benefits, substance abuse and mental health, health care and criminal justice. Ms Wright was integral in the development and implementation of the NYS Domestic Violence and the Workplace initiative required by Executive Order in 2006. Ms. Wright has held numerous positions in the domestic violence field. She is the former Executive Director of the New York State Coalition Against Domestic Violence, a statewide grassroots advocacy group. As the first women of color to head a state domestic violence coalition, she coordinated statewide legislative activities, organized regional domestic violence efforts, participated in numerous policy discussions with state lawmakers and made dozens of media appearances, both locally and nationally. Ms. Wright has been on the Board of Directors of the Pride Center of the Capital Region, formerly the CDGLCC, and currently serves as President. She has also just completed a 10 year reign as the President of A Call To Men, a national organization of men and women committed to ending violence in the lives of women and girls. Ms. Wright is the former Co-chair of In Our Own Voices, and served as interim executive director in 2005. "I think we got to create a really solid team and I think that was pretty significant accomplishment." “It is always and honor to receive recognition for work that comes from the heart! The Pride Center is an amazing organization and I couldn’t be prouder of serving as president for 2 years. I follow in the footsteps of many wonderful leaders of the Pride Center. I am humbled to be among them!”

H arvey M ilk A ward

The highest award given, given to a person in the community whose work emulates the ideals of Harvey Milk. Nora Yates Nora Yates is the former Executive Director of the Pride Center, serving from 20082012, and credited with growing and stabilizing the 40-year old agency. Before that, Nora served as Field Director for the Empire State Pride Agenda from 2004-2008, directing the marriage equality "ground game" and leading a team of Marriage Ambassadors from around the state. In 2012, Nora was chosen to participate in the first class of Governor Cuomo's Empire State Fellows. A fellow alum of the University at Albany like Harvey Milk, Nora is grateful for this award, and for standing among the likes of the great leaders in the Capital Region LGBT Community who have received it in the past. "It's exciting for me to be have been a part of the organization, but also be a part of the history and the people who have done this since the seventies and have made change locally and nationally." “As the honorary chairs of this year’s Gala, we truly look forward celebrating the Pride Center and the extraordinary accomplishments of this year’s award recipients, whose efforts contribute so meaningfully to the strength of our community,” said Mona Golub and Marie DeBrocky. Please join us in celebrating these amazing people at the Pride Center Gala on Friday October 18, 2013 at The Century House. Tickets may be purchased at www.capitalpridecenter.org or call (518) 462-6138.

It Takes Some Getting Used To: An Interview with Artist Stephanie Slominski By Steven Minchin,Romaine Brooks Gallery Manager Who/ what inspires you artistically? Everything around me in one way or another, NYC graffiti, wild style, environment.... what’s there, what’s not there......contrast... similarity..., album cover art (Frank Zappa, Grateful Dead Pink Floyd), they made me realize there weren’t any rules and that if it makes sense to me its ok, and if it doesn’t make sense to me and I like it, and am comfortable with that its still ok, advertising..... very creative and often gives me ideas, proverbidioms a series by T. E. Breitenbach.... huge influence, from early childhood on and blotter art no explanation needed How does your personal life influence your work, if at all? It’s hard to say; of course it has to, right? Being a transgender woman, and a recovering drug Addict, a single parent, .and an accounting graduate, it all has some say in what my work will entail, I guess I use both sides of my brain and sometimes they cooperate. My 17 years of crack addiction, brought me to the great abyss of dereliction, homelessness, jails and rehabs, and of course by the time it was over, near death. Being clean, and having a second chance at life, my senses are sharpened, I experience life more intensely. What, if any, are the themes that run through your work? Do you find yourself returning to certain motifs or ideas, and why? I enjoy the bizarre. I put slices of scenes that are completely unrelated together in a way that makes sense to me. I want to inspire hallucinations. I want people to stare at my

images and think, “this isn’t right. This isn’t right at all” Have you had any formal training or classes? Did that help or hinder you as an artist? I started out many years ago as a cake decorator, and realized quickly that I bad some talent. I took all my undergrad electives in the Fine Arts building as a way of developing the other half of my brain, and “detoxing’’ from the world of accounting and corporate finance. These classes introduced me formally to the world of fine arts, and opened a door for me to explore and extend my own creative side. What do you think the purpose of art is in the world? What is the purpose of your art? Tough question; I think the purpose of art in the world is different for everyone, an escape? An investment? Artists convey messages and express their own viewpoints...or none of the above. I create my art to make ME happy, if someone enjoys my work that’s great too, and that’s the world I am beginning to break into with this show, hopefully, but it has to satisfy me first. What are your proudest accomplishments, artistic and otherwise? Raising my children alone-and enjoying their academic success. Over ten years of freedom from active cocaine addiction. [Getting my] Bachelors in Accounting. What is the medium of your artwork, and why

do you use that medium? Photographs, with little or no post processing, and digital imagery, (including collage, appropriation and some original compilations). Somehow I feel these two polar opposites of imagery balance each other out and hopefully the viewer can take some of that away while trying to decide which images to give credibility, and which he decides are illusory. What is the title and theme of your show, and how did you originate, develop and execute it? “It Takes Some Getting Used To” it’s not a name or title rather what is required of those exposed to my work, and me. Being involved in gender transition is something that affects everyone in your circumference. Some run, but for those who stay close, dealing with the loss of the “you” they have come to know, while staying supportive and loving is no small undertaking. I found the process best described “it takes some getting used to” for myself and those around me, hence the name. I think that concept carries over into my art, only basing that on some of the reactions I received during in-class critiques of my work, I initially saw people tilt their heads...but after a while they warmed up to my style. Stephanie’s “It Takes Some Getting Used To” opens at the Romaine Brooks Gallery on 1st Friday, October 4 with a reception from 5-9pm. The show will be in the gallery through the month of October. The Romaine Brooks Gallery at the Pride Center of the Capital Region is located on the 3rd floor of 332 Hudson Ave, Albany.

ObamaCare: What Do You Have To Do? By Terence Meehan

Does ObamaCare have you confused? Do you know what you have to do on January 1st to be in compliance with the law? No? You’re not alone. According to polls, about a third of Americans admit they are unfamiliar with the major details of the law, which is officially called “The Affordable Care Act.” I’ll leave the political and policy issues aside for now and instead address this question: What do you have to do? While I believe the law is very good policy, I am writing not as an advocate, but as an academic and a member of our community. In my research, I have learned a lot about the healthcare law and want to share some of the basic information here. For more detailed information, starting October 1st, visit the Exchange website at www. nystateofhealth.ny.gov. After you answer a few questions about your income, location, household size and insurance status, the site will explain the options that are available to you. If you have more specific questions or problems, contact Community Health Advocates at (888) 614-5400. Find the situation below that most closely matches yours. The answers provided will offer a rough idea of what you need to do by January 1. I’ll leave aside the situation of small business owners, who may face special requirements for their employees. I have insurance through my job. •You don’t have to do anything. •You will have new benefits and protections against practices that could have threatened your finances and your health. For example, now you’ll never face annual or lifetime limits on coverage and you can never be denied care for a pre-existing condition. •Your insurance company will send you paperwork around tax time that you can use to show the IRS that you’re insured.

I have insurance through Medicaid, Child Heath Plus, Family Health Plus Or Health NY. •You don’t have to do anything. I have health insurance through Medicare. •You don’t have to do anything. •You now have access to important preventive services at no cost to you. Call Medicare or talk to your doctor. •The “donut hole” in Medicare Part D for prescriptions is slowly being eliminated. Until then, you can get discounts on certain prescriptions. Call Medicare or talk to your pharmacist. I don’t have health insurance and I don’t want it. •You must either buy health insurance (for you and your dependents) on the Exchange website by January 1st or pay a fine (a “tax”) next year. The fine is $95 per adult and $47.50 per child OR 1% of your income, whichever is greater. The fines will increase to $695 or 2.5% of income by 2016. •You are exempt from the fine only if the cheapest insurance available on the Exchange is more than about 10% of your income, which is very unlikely considering the discounts (“subsidies”) that the government will provide to most people. •You may want to reconsider buying insurance. No one stays healthy forever, and unexpected medical expenses are a leading cause of financial crises and bankruptcy. Having insurance protects you from unexpected disaster. I don’t have health insurance. I want it, but I can’t afford it. •You must buy health insurance (for you and your dependents) on the Exchange website by January 1st, or pay a fine (see above). The government will offer subsidies to many people, which will lower the price you have to pay for insurance on the Exchange. •While “affordable” is a matter of interpretation, you won’t be required to pay more than a certain percentage of your income for health insurance. The subsidies will automatically lower the price you have to pay. While that percentage varies with your income, it is always below 10%. It is much lower if your income is low. •You can find out how much insurance will cost for you, given subsidies from the government, on the Exchange website.

Here are some rough examples: oIf your individual income is less than $14,856, you will qualify for Medicaid at no cost to you. oIf your household income is less than $30,657 for a family of 4, you will qualify for Medicaid at no cost to you. oIf your individual income is $17,000, you can expect to pay about $55 a month for a medium quality (“silver”) plan in the Capital Region. oIf your individual income is $25,000, you can expect to pay about $145 a month for a silver plan •Even with insurance from the Exchange, most medical services will require a co-pay from you. But you will be able to get many important preventive services at no cost, including screenings for blood pressure, cholesterol, depression, sexually transmitted infections, domestic violence, mammograms and cervical cancer. I have insurance through my job but it is not affordable •Affordable is a relative term. But if your employer-provided insurance costs you more than about 9.5% of your income, you can visit the Exchange to see if you qualify for cheaper plans. You may qualify for discounts (“subsidies”) on the plans offered there, depending on your income. I am a non-citizen legal resident •If you have lived in the US for 5 or more years, you are treated just like a US citizen. You must have insurance by January 1 and you can use the Exchange if you don’t already have insurance (see above). •Importantly, getting insurance through the Exchange will not be used against you in immigration matters (only cash assistance counts). I am an undocumented immigrant and have no health insurance •The law does not apply to you. You don’t have to buy insurance and you don’t have to pay a fine. You are not eligible to buy insurance on the Exchange. •You can, however, get assistance directly from most hospitals in the area. Check with your local hospital about their programs that offer regular checkups and other services at a reduced cost or no cost.

ObamaCare: What Do You Have To Do? (continued) The Capital District LBGT community While everyone needs access to medical care, our community has special health needs. If more people get health insurance, and see a doctor, our community will be healthier. LGBT people smoke at higher rates than the general population and are more likely to suffer from depression and substance abuse. We (especially gay men and trans women) are at higher risk for HIV/AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases. Trans people face particularly tough challenges in the workforce and therefore are more likely to

be uninsured than the average American. Importantly, the law prohibits insurance policies from discriminating on the basis of sexual orientation, HIV status or gender identity and sex stereotyping. The Exchange website will refer you to any of the other programs that New York offers its residents, even if you think you can’t afford it. The subsidies on the Exchange apply to more people than most government programs. You are eligible if your income is less than about $46,000 for an individual or about $78,000 for a family of three. Don’t assume you don’t qualify for as-

sistance. Check out the Exchange website at www.nystateofhealth.ny.gov. Terence Meehan is a Ph.D. student in public administration at the Rockefeller College of Public Affairs and Policy at SUNY Albany. He has a Master’s degree in public administration from Harvard University. His publications include a co-written article in the June edition of Health Affairs on the possible effects of the Affordable Care Act on ADAP programs. His research focuses on health care, nonprofits and policy advocacy.

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Equality By Acey

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Over the last decade there has been a significant rise in the number of LGBTQ individuals and couples building their own families through adoption, foster care, donor insemination and surrogacy. There has also been history of judgment against same-sex and gender nonconforming people becoming parents. Although we’ve come a long way in supporting gay and lesbian couples in starting families, significant prejudice still exists against transgender people. As result transgender individuals are often hesitant to access services for fear of judgment and rejection. All individuals, regardless of sex, gender identity or sexual orientation and who desire to be parents, are entitled to have the opportunity and information necessary to explore different avenues to create the family they’ve dreamed of. Family building can be challenging on many levels and adoption processes -- although exciting – can also be lengthy and may be intimidating as outsiders thoroughly investigate people before approving them as potential parents. For trans people, it can be especially daunting. Wanting to be a parent and needing the assistance of an adoption agency is naturally overwhelming therefore finding an agency that is progressive and sensitive to the unique needs of LGBTQ people is essential. Knowing these realities, Friends in Adoption (FIA), a non-profit, licensed adoption agency, sought the expertise of Choices Counseling & Consulting (CCC) for edu-

cation in training professionals who work with prospective families. FIA supports those interested in adopting and also with pregnant women/couples considering placing their baby with an adoptive family. Choices and the Institute for Gender, Relationships, Identity, and Sexuality (TIGRIS) provided formal workshops to enhance the cultural competency of FIA in regard to working with LGBTQ adoptive parents. Through the evaluation of policies and procedures, Choices assisted FIA with developing best practices guidelines to be utilized in homestudy evaluations. Implementation of these changes has provided FIA with valuable tools necessary to best serve the LGBTQ community. Although FIA has been leader in serving gay and lesbian couples for the past two decades, they are now also committed to working with the trans community. Completion of this training with CCC and TIGRIS will provide FIA the All Children - All Families Agency Seal of Recognition, a national initiative established by the Human Rights Campaign. What’s particularly exciting about the collaboration of CCC and FIA is the joint focus on celebrating diversity and commitment to equality in adoption. These agencies will continue to work together to encourage and support LGBTQ individuals and couples considering adoption. Choices Counseling and Consulting has worked with the LGBTQ community for 25 years and part of that work has always been supportive of LGBTQ people look-

ing to establish and raise families through adoption. Knowing the stress and anxiety that can exist for LGBTQ individuals interested in being parents, Choices offers clinical and consulting services both pre and post-placement. Choices will continue to provide professional home studies to the Capital Region and now link individuals and families directly with adoption possibilities through FIA. Choices Counseling & Consulting and Friends in Adoption openly welcome diversity, understanding that loving parents come from all walks of life. Whether you’re curious about, considering, or committed to adoption as your path towards familybuilding, Choices and FIA are dedicated to providing all adoptive parents with acceptance and compassionate guidance! For more information on homestudies, please see an article by Arlene Lev, LCSW-R, the Clinical Director of Choices, available at: http://choicesconsulting. com/2013/04/22/scrutinizing-would-beparents. For further information please contact: Choices Counseling & Consulting 518-438-2222 www.choicesconsulting.com Friends in Adoption 1-800-982-3678 www.friendsinadoption.org

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The Mastery Workshop: Claiming Your Power, Finding Your Strength By David Reynolds The Mastery Workshop is a two day experience of growth and empowerment for those living with HIV/AIDS and other life challenging situations. The Mastery Workshop is a project of Northern Lights Alternatives of the Capital District, Inc. and is familiar to many in the community as Northern Lights. Supporters of the Mastery will be glad to know that the next workshop is scheduled for Saturday, November 9th and Sunday, November 10th at the Pride Center in Albany. What exactly is the Mastery? It is a two day workshop devoted to helping individuals with difficult life circumstances reclaim their power and live fuller, healthier lives. During the two days (workshops are generally held from about 9:30am - 4:30pm), participants gather with trained facilitators to engage in discussions and activities designed to help participants develop a stronger connection to their inner voice, and learn about additional resources to continue the process. Through guided mediations, facilitated discussions, group activities, and sharing of strength, participants are encouraged to recognize their power for action and commit to a passion for living each day to the fullest. Empowering those with HIV/AIDS and helping to increase self-care and awareness of safer sex practices is still at the heart of the mission of the workshop. We are also mindful of the impact of HIV on those who are affected, such as friends, family, human service providers, and healthcare workers who love and care for HIV+ persons. However, participants come to the Mastery Workshop from all backgrounds and may or may not be HIV+. With a new Board of Directors and dedicated volunteers, the Mastery Workshop is expanding its outreach and wants to make sure the community knows that the workshop is open to all. In addition, many of the great aspects of the workshop are the fellowship and connectedness participants often build

during the experience. Continued engagement with the Mastery and with fellow participants after the workshop can be part of the life affirming process. Former participants serve on the Board of Directors, act as volunteers to coordinate the workshop, and serve as “back row” volunteers during the workshop to assist and support the participants and facilitators. Many people with HIV/AIDS are living longer lives than ever before. For some individuals, HIV may not be the condition that is holding them back or cutting them off from a more fully engaged life and powerful living. For example, some individuals may have co-infections with Hepatitis C, or may be dealing with issues related to diabetes, heart conditions, etc. The workshop provides a meaningful opportunity for all to explore barriers to relationships with self or others, increase self-awareness, and move toward a healthier life. The Mastery Workshop has been helping people connect to one another and reclaim their power for over twenty-five years. The Mastery Workshop began in New York City in 1986. People in the theatre industry were coming to a performing arts program run by Sally Fisher and sharing with her that they were told they had a fatal diagnosis. Sally saw that these individuals were changing their life patterns in reaction to their diagnosis. In response, Sally Fisher adapted an actor’s workshop into the first Mastery. Participants began making positive changes for their lives. After realizing the power of the workshop, she literally took it on the road. She went to every major city from New York to Los Angeles, and into Canada and England. As Sally and her colleagues passed through Minnesota there were Northern Lights in the sky, and that is where the name Northern Lights Alternatives came from – a light in the darkness of HIV. Alice and Robert Mazur participated in a Mastery Workshop in Oklahoma City in 1998. When they returned home to the Capital District, Alice realized there was nothing in this area like the Mastery. She began the work of bringing the

Mastery to the Capital Region. The first local Mastery took place in 1990. Since then there have been over 300 people that have participated in the Capital Region Mastery. In 2012, Alice and Bob Mazur retired after many years of hard work and devotion to the Mastery. A new Board of Directors formed at that time and is dedicated to keeping the Mastery Workshop vital and available in our community. The Mastery in the Capital Region continues to evolve and grow, but some key aspects of the workshop will not change. The Mastery Workshop is a safe place, where confidentiality and respect are emphasized and expected. The workshop is always a fairly small group, usually no more than fifteen participants, so that all who participate can be fully heard and everyone knows they are valued. Facilitators and volunteers work before, during, and after the workshop to make sure that days are spent in meaningful activity and that those participating will have a worthwhile, genuine and sustaining experience. As the Mastery continues in the Capital Region, we are actively seeking new volunteers, board members, funding, and ideas. As we enter 2014, we hope to continue to partner with organizations that have supported and hosted that Mastery in the past, and build new bridges to organizations and individuals who share our dedication and desire to help people live better, stronger lives. If you are interested in attending a workshop, have ideas about partnering with us to hold a workshop, want to participate or donate, or just want additional information please visit our website: www.capitalregionmastery.org or email: info@capitalregionmastery.org The next workshop will be held on November 9th and 10th at the Pride Center of the Capital Region, 332 Hudson Ave., Albany. 9:30am – 4:30pm. Breakfast and lunch provided both days. Suggested Donation: $25.00 but no one will be turned away for inability to donate.

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Garden: Late August

There comes a point in late August when time stops; the garden grows quiet, suspended; the plants have finished growing but have not yet started to die; there is enormous energy but it is not going anywhere. Really, there is nothing to do but sit and look. I love late August in my garden. It is too early to transplant and too late to worry about weeds. The lawn needs attention but that is a mid-September project. I could deadhead but why bother, and besides I love the look of the deadheads tumbling in and among the still blooming. I can see that the phlox need to be divided but that is a job for next spring; today I can enjoy their excess, the way they push against and into the boxwoods and the smokebush. Everything is lush. The garden has stopped just short of being overgrown and chaotic. For the moment it is static in its plenitude, providing endless moments of beauty and surprise. And so I sit in those chairs that I placed throughout the garden in June and have not used until now and I look. The butterfly bush (Buddleia) actually attracts butterflies and from my office window I can watch them swarm and I see that there are butterflies in the world other than monarchs. In the white garden I see flashes of yellow as the goldfinch dart in, perch on the dead echinacea blooms, and peck out the seeds. I see that some pink phlox has come up in the midst of my mass of white. I have no idea how it got there but it will have to

The IRS

and

go. This is a task I could do now, but I probably won’t. It is better to let late August last into early September and to keep looking. The pink and white cleome which also came up on their own can stay; they are annuals, and besides they are pink and white, and stranger still, their pink, unlike the phlox’s pink, makes the white of the white phlox and white echinacea and white coral bells even whiter. In the red garden there is unplanned pink as well (I am beginning to think that pink is the color to which all plants revert when they get tired of being special) but who cares, for the eye is held by the saucer-size lipstick-red blooms of the perennial hibiscus, propped up by the magenta lobelia. The ‘dwarf’ castor bean has grown to the size of a small tree and its bright red seed pods shoot up like exclamation points. The lovely new paths I created for this garden are now impassable as salvia, bee balm, and phlox sprawl over the stones. For the first time my crabapple tree actually has dark red apples that I can see from a distance; the late blooming Seven Son’s tree has finally flowered, its blooms will last for several weeks; and then they too will turn red. And everywhere, in the midst of it all, come the red-orange cannas that I started late and thought would never make it As I sit and look, I take pencil and paper, for this is a time of year when one can see the bones of the garden in spite of, or perhaps

Same-Sex Marriages

The Internal Revenue Service has announced that all legal same-sex marriages will be recognized for Federal tax purposes. This includes filings for Federal income taxes, as well as Federal gift and Federal estate taxes.

The same-sex marriages referred to are any marriages that are legal in any one of the fifty states, D.C., a U.S. Territory or foreign country. Domestic partnerships, civil unions, and other such arrangements are not covered under this announcement. For 2013, samesex married couples must file as married for Federal tax purposes. For 2010, 2011 or 2012 filing Federal married is optional. If a taxpayer filed a protective claim, Federal 2009 may also be open for an original Federal 2009 filing or a Federal 2009 amended return Also, if one spouse purchased same-sex health coverage on an after tax basis from an employer, returns maybe amended if the amounts were added to wages previously. Example # 1 - Dawn and Debra were married in Canada in 2006 and they have not yet filed their 2012 Federal Income Tax Return.

By Judith Fetterely because of, the lushness. Just as in winter, in late August the garden stands still long enough for me to see it whole. My head races with ideas. I can see where another paperbark maple should be planted. Sara wants a vegetable garden and to create it we have to move a large rock. I can see where to put it; I can see where to put other rocks too. I can see that a saucer magnolia will provide the sense of an ending to the garden that begins across the front of the house, sweeps around the south side, surrounds the patio, runs down the north side of the back yard, includes the blue spruces that line the back of the property, and stops at what started out as a demonstration shrubbery. I can even see how to finish the grand design of the entire garden! Yes, plans are afoot for making a vegetable garden for Sara next year and perhaps taking down one of the pear trees to give her more space, but for now, when I finally must do something other than sit and look, I saunter by my favorite pear tree, pull off an almost ripe pear, and crunch it down, tasting in its juice the full sweetness of this particular moment of peace and quiet in the garden. Judith Fetterley lives and gardens in Glenmont,New York. She also runs Perennial Wisdom, a garden design business for new and existing gardens. She can be reached at fetterleyj@gmail.com.

By Mark Witecki

Taxpayers who haven’t filed their Federal 2012 taxes can choose to file as two single people or a married couple before Sept. 16. After that, they must file as married. Therefore, since Dawn and Debra did not file before September 16, they must file as Federal married for 2012. For 2013, they must file as married unless their marital situation changes, such as divorce. They can also, but are not required to file Federal amended returns for 2010 and 2011, and also Federal 2009 if they filed a protective claim for 2009. Example # 2 - Jeff and Zachary were married in Utah in 2009 and moved to New York in 2013. Since Utah did not recognize the marriage, and if they did not remarry in a state where the marriage was legal, they may not file as married. As it turns out, Jeff and Zachary married in Vermont in 2010. Therefore, they must file as Federal married in 2013, and may, but are not required to amend Federal returns for 2010, 2011 and 2012 and for 2009 if they filed a protective claim for 2009. It’s important to review all gift and estate tax returns as well.

If you have any questions please do not hesitate to contact me. I can also be reached at mdwitecki@hotmail.com. Mark D. Witecki specializes in small businesses and professional individuals. Mr. Witecki has a B. S. in Accounting from S. U. N. Y. Albany and an M. S. in Accounting from Syracuse University. Mark D. Witecki is a Certified Public Accountant, CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER ™ practitioner, Certified Fraud Examiner, Certified College Planning Specialist and is admitted to practice before the United States Tax Court. Certified Financial Planner Board of Standards Inc. owns the certification marks CFP® , CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER™ and federally registered CFP (with flame design) in the U.S., which it awards to individuals who successfully complete CFP Board’s initial and ongoing certification requirements. Mark’s office is located at 3701 State Street, Schenectady, New York and contacted at 3464000.

Michael Cooks And You Can Too

It seems as if everybody I know went to Italy this summer. Every time I turned around, I ran into someone who was either planning a trip or just getting back. At least a half-dozen different friends have been to Rome or Venice or toured Sicily, Naples and Sardinia. So I thought that this month, we’d take a vicarious tour of Italy through three classic Italian pasta sauces. We’ll begin in Bologna with a traditional Bolognese sauce, travel south towards Rome where we’ll stop for some Alfredo and then head on down to Naples where we’ll finish with a classic Puttenesca. Whip up one of these sauces, toss a salad and open a bottle of vino and you’ll feel like you’re there. Pasta Bolognese Bolognese sauce (ragù alla Bolognese in Italian, also known by its French name, Sauce Bolognaise) is a meat-based pasta sauce originating in Bologna in the central Northern region of Italy. It’s one of the most famous Italian sauces and the one that most Americans are familiar with. The people of Bologna traditionally serve their famous ragù with freshly made tagliatelle (the northern Italian name for fettuccine). Less traditionally, the sauce is served with rigatoni or used to make lasagna or cannelloni. 1 lb. ground beef 1 lb. ground veal or lamb 1 tablespoon olive oil 1 tablespoon butter 1 large onion, chopped 4 - 6 cloves of garlic 1/4 cup red wine 2 carrots, peeled and sliced 1 16 oz. can whole tomatoes with/ juice salt & pepper to taste 1 pound fettuccine or rigatoni Parmesan cheese for grating on top Have all your meats ready to go and start a big pot of water boiling. Peel and dice the onion. Then peel and finely chop the garlic. Peel the carrots and cut them into 1/2 inch pieces cutting across the carrot. In a large

Michael Meade

sauce pot, brown the chopped beef and veal (or lamb), drain the fat and reserve the meat for later. In the same pot, sauté the onion and garlic in the olive oil & butter until the onions are translucent. Deglaze the pan with wine and reduce by half. Puree the whole tomatoes and add them to the pot along with the sliced carrots and reserved meat. Simmer for about 1 1/2 hours. (If the sauce becomes too dry add a little water or chicken stock) Salt and Pepper to taste. In a big pot of salted boiling water, cook pasta al dente. Serve sauce over pasta with grated cheese.

Additional freshly grated Parmesan cheese for sprinkling

Fettuccine Alfredo

Pasta Puttenesca

Alfredo is a sauce made from heavy cream, butter, parsley and minced garlic. It is most often served on fettuccine. Alfredo sauce was invented in Rome in 1914 by restaurant owner Alfredo di Lello. An earlier version was a Roman dish known as Fettuccine al burro (fettuccine with butter), prepared only with butter, Parmigiano Reggiano and reserved cooking water as a sauce. The butter was added both before and after the fettuccine was put into the serving bowl, a technique known as “doppio burro” (double butter). Di Lillo’s original contribution to the dish was to double the amount of butter in the bowl before the fettuccine was poured in, creating a “triplo burro” (triple butter) effect. Cream was later added to the recipe to create a thicker, smoother (and even richer) sauce.

“Puttenesca” literally means “sauce of the prostitutes”. The name originated in Naples after the local women of easy virtue. The reason why the dish gained such a name is debated. One possibility is that the name is a reference to the sauce’s hot, spicy flavor. Another is that the dish was offered to prospective customers at a low price to entice them into a house of ill repute. According to the most popular theory, however, it was simply a quick, cheap meal that prostitutes could prepare between customers.

Fettuccine Alfredo became extremely popular and di Lello’s restaurant attracted many celebrities. Mary Pickford and Douglas Fairbanks, two silent screen stars whose marriage created a media frenzy not equaled until Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt, fell in love with the dish while on their highly-publicized honeymoon in 1919. As a result, Fettuccine Alfredo was introduced in the United States and became for many Americans their first taste of Italian cuisine. Today, Fettuccine Alfredo is by far more popular in the United States than in Italy, where it is mostly served to American tourists. There are many modifications to the basic Fettuccine Alfredo, including chicken, cheeses or vegetables. It can also be served on many different types of pasta. 1/2 cup butter 2 cloves garlic, minced 2 cups heavy whipping cream 1 cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese 1 teaspoon salt (or to taste) 1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper (or to taste) 1 pound fettuccine Chopped fresh parsley for sprinkling

In a big pot of salted boiling water, cook fettuccine al dente. While pasta is cooking, melt butter in large skillet; add cream, salt and pepper. Bring to a boil and simmer for a few minutes uncovered to reduce and thicken sauce. Remove from heat and add cooked fettuccine and one cup of Parmesan. Sprinkle with chopped parsley. Toss to combine and serve immediately with an extra sprinkling of Parmesan cheese over the top, if desired.

4 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil 6 cloves garlic, sliced 1/2 cup red wine 1 16 oz. can diced tomatoes 16 Kalamata olives, pitted and roughly chopped 4 tablespoons capers 6 anchovy filets, chopped (optional) 1/2 teaspoon ground black pepper 4 tablespoons chopped basil 1/2 lb cooked penne or farfalle 1/2 cup freshly grated Reggiano Parmesan cheese Sauté garlic cloves in olive oil on medium/ low heat until they begin to brown. Add wine and tomatoes and simmer about 10 minutes, stirring regularly. Add olives, capers, anchovies and pepper and simmer another 5 minutes. Stir in basil and then pasta, and cook until heated through. Plate pasta and top with grated parmesan and a sprig of fresh basil. Michael Meade studied at the Culinary Institute of America in Hyde Park, New York, worked at Jack’s Oyster House in Albany and is currently sous-chef for Thunder Mountain Curry in Troy. Send questions or comments to Mmeade1215@ aol.com

My Big Gay Ears: Five Reasons To See Live Dance This Fall by

Joseph Dalton

It’s time to turn off “Dancing with the Stars” and “So You Think You Can Dance” and buy a ticket to see live dance somewhere, some time this fall. Dance is best experienced in person. Here’s why: 1 - Bodies of dancers are sexy. They’re athletes you’re seeing onstage, there’s really no other way to look at it. But rather than wearing heavy uniforms for long periods (baseball or football), or skimpy outfits for quick feats (swimming, track), they’re often costumed in revealing garb and they stay in front of you for an hour or two at a time. So just sit back and enjoy the eye candy. Mark Morris, the flamboyant and brilliant choreographer, once said something along the lines of “I like dancers with big butts.” His dancers and his dances are always fun to watch. They return to The Egg on Thursday, November 14. www.TheEgg.org. 2 - A body in motion tells a story. And it can be a pleasant relief to sit in a the-

ater for narrative evening but without all those words, words, words. Let the movement speak and your mind will soon fill in the blanks. It’s not hard to do. Choreographer Matthew Bourne is great at telling stories with beautiful dancers and big colorful sets and costumes. He became famous when he took Tchaikovsky’s “Swan Lake” and made the chorus of swans all men. One of his latest efforts, “Sleeping Beauty” (also to music of Tchaikovsky) is included in this year’s Broadway series at Proctors with eight performances running October 15-20. www.Proctors.org 3 - The body tells a lot about who a person is. Whether pierced and tattooed, emaciated or hunky, the body speaks of time and place and the condition of living. Picture a skinny punk on the Bowery in the ‘90s and you could probably write his story, hear his soundtrack. Benjamin Smoke was such a guy. He worked at the rock temple CBGBs, performed in various bands, occasionally donned drag and died in 1999 at age 39. His legacy is the starting point of inspiration for David Dorfman’s “Come, and Back Again,” a multi-media dance event headed this fall to the prestigious Brooklyn Academy of Music. But first it’s going to be at Mass MoCA in North Adams on Thursday, October 10. www. MassMoCA.org 4. Body weight communicates. Gotten shoved in a crowd lately? More likely, you’ve been aware of the mass of your lover as he or she tosses and turns be-

side you in bed. Dance is not always about lightness and grace and defying gravity. Savion Glover is a tap dancer who revolutionized his art form by emphasizing weight. Sometimes he’s danced in work boots! Guess the guy just likes a heavy beat. Glover has been a regular at The Egg, and returns during the holidays, joined by a jazz band that includes drummer Jack DeJohnette and clarinetist Don Byron. 8 p.m. Saturday, December 28. www.TheEgg.org. 5. Everybody should see “The Nutcracker.” It’s a holiday tradition that you already know, whether you realize it or not. Tchaikovsky’s terrific melodies infiltrate your consciousness through the inescapable holiday soundtrack heard in every retail outlet. Why not go and experience the rest of the “Nutcracker” package? The cast usually consists of adorable toddlers, aspiring ballerinas, and muscular young men (the prized commodity of every ballet company). The finale features a couple pros who show how it’s done. The biggest and best “Nutcracker” in our area comes from Northeast Ballet, and it stars Lauren Lovette and Chase Finlay of the New York City Ballet. Performances are December 7-8 at Proctors. www.Proctors.org. Joseph Dalton writes about the arts in the Times Union and sells houses across the Capital Region. Find out more about all his endeavors at: www. JosephDalton.net.

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Here’s Guffman: Do Good Reviews Matter?

This past Labor Day weekend, my partner and I were debating whether to head down to Hudson without tickets and try to get into Stageworks’ final performance of “Stockholm”. I dismissed the idea of calling ahead for tickets. We’ve been to Stageworks a dozen or so times and have never needed tickets beforehand. We got there and the parking lot was empty. The first reason for calling ahead of time would be to find out that the show started at 7:30. Everybody’s doing their own thing with show times. The second reason would be because we were extremely lucky to get two of the last four remaining obstructed view/standing room tickets. Wow! When we returned to the lobby after a quick dinner on Warren Street we were fortunate enough to chat a few minutes with the gifted and gracious Laura Margolis, Artistic Director of Stageworks and director of this evening’s production of “Stockholm”. She told us how on the second public performance, still in previews, a group that has been attending her productions for years filed past her in the lobby after the performance and not one ventured to even make eye contact. Oh, this was not good. She needed word of mouth.

By Patrick White

The regional reviews came out and they were for the most part positive. Steve Barnes of The Times Union said “It’s not perfect but after it’s over you know you’ve truly seen something worthwhile.” Bob Goepfert of The Troy Record raved that it was “…an amazing production that is exciting, bold, beautiful and erotic…if you like daring theater that will make you think and feel, it should not be missed.” But still they struggled to find an audience and a matinee was even cancelled due to poor sales. So, what happened? What worked? I foolishly asked, not aware of the answer. “The New York Times” she replied. Behind us in the lobby were two blow-ups of the August 23rd review.

past spring asking pretty much the same thing. Why wasn’t there an audience after my great review?

Ben Brantley it turns out is a Columbia County resident and on top of his frequent forays to the Berkshires this summer (“On the Town”, Mother Courage”, “Anna Christie” and more) he made his first visit to Stageworks in nearby Hudson. He was so taken with the production that he admitted he was ashamed he hadn’t been to the theatre before and that after the good things he head about last season’s “Tomorrow in the Battle” he was sorry he missed it. I can confirm it was exceptional and actually, I preferred it to “Stockholm”.

I have to believe that more coverage is beneficial and that if good live theatre is experienced that it will be valued and encourage people to want more. Mr. Barnes ran a summer theatre summary this past Labor Day weekend talking about the 29 productions he had seen in the past 10 weeks. I’ve got to think and hope that this kind of coverage will be beneficial to the Capital Region even if most of what he was writing about in the summer were the world class productions in the Berkshires. The people will show up eventually. I’m going to have to start phoning ahead for tickets.

So, do reviews matter? Do we not trust our own reviewers? Or are we so inferior that if it was created here, it can’t be worth much until we’re told by a higher authority? Can a good review sell a show? Well, it obviously can but is it only because it’s from the Times? Steve Barnes ran a piece on the closing weekend of the fantastic production of “Red” at Capital Rep this

Most people up here won’t say that good reviews influenced them to go see a show. You never hear after a performance “Oh, it’s as good as the reviewers said.” You will frequently hear people use bad reviews as an excuse to miss a production. What can happen with a good review? It can be printed on the lowest circulation day. It can be buried in the Capital Region section instead of Arts & Living. It can have a mixed headline-”…not for everyone”.

Patrick White is a Capital Region actor who is currently directing “The Glass Menagerie” with Our Own Productions thru 10/6 and will be performing with Confetti Fest 9’s evening of one-acts 10/18-10/26.

Trans View #116: Private Manning’s Coming Out

October 11th is National Coming Out Day, so it’s timely to raise the complex issues with regard to Chelsea Manning’s coming out this past August. For those unaware, the former Private Bradley Manning was court martialed and convicted of leaking hundreds of thousands of secret government documents to the WikiLeaks website and was sentenced to 35 years in prison. Upon her sentencing, Manning released a statement that she was female and “wanted everyone to know the real me.” The NBC News article on August 22, 2013 stated that Manning’s “gender confusion was a factor used by the defense”. Personally, I would have like to have seen more detail on that. Oddly, it seems the foreign press did a better job at relating this part of the Manning story. I would suggest readers of this column go to Wikipedia where she is listed as Bradley Manning for a detailed back story. Despite the listing under her male name, the Wikipedia writing is very respectful of Manning’s gender identity, properly referring to her with female pronouns and her chosen name, Chelsea, unlike CNN who has been called to task for it’s disrespectful reporting on the issue of Manning’s gender identity. Other news sources like the New York Times have done a credible job of respecting Manning’s gender identity as well, and the Times’ editorial was very spot on in outlining the issues regarding Manning, her conviction and her gender identity. There is not sufficient room in this column to thoroughly discuss the myriad

of factors in Manning’s life and background which led up to her decision to leak the secret documents. But Manning’s case will likely be a landmark case for the United States Military. Like the case of Vanessa Adams who sued the Federal Bureau of Prisons and won the right for inmates to be diagnosed with transgenderism and treated with hormone therapy while in prison, Manning will likely follow the Adam’s precedent in arguing her case, and perhaps, succeed. The critical factors here are that transsexualism is a biological condition; and, like any other biological condition, deserves proper assessment and treatment, to not do so brings harm to the trans person. This falls under the 8th Amendment which forbids “cruel and unusual punishments...” now widely recognized with regard to transgender prisoners. Mind now, that Adams won her case only after she had attempted suicide and castration. Let’s hope that Manning will choose a safer route in the courts. No inmate to date has won the right to have access to sex reassignment surgery while incarcerated. In Massachusetts, Michelle Kosilek (formerly Robert), convicted of murdering her wife has sued the state for the right to treatment for her gender dysphoria, including surgery. A federal court in Boston in September 2012 has decided that Kosilek should have access to sex reassignment surgery. That case is currently being appealed by the State of Massachusetts. It is my opinion there is a good chance the decision will be upheld. The Kosilek decision and the Manning case bring to light difficult questions for both the transgender community and our larger society. They become a lightning rod for our collective rage about lack of access to care for everyone, and for a society’s deeply imbedded transphobia. As Jennifer Levi is quoted as saying about the Kosilek case: “Constitutional rights belong to

Moonhawk River Stone © 2013 everyone, even the least loved, least popular people among us,” Levi is an attorney for the Gay & Lesbian Advocates & Defenders who worked on the case. When one reads about Manning’s life it is easy to read between the lines of a situation where the family was highly dysfunctional and disordered, where, even if Manning were not a transsexual woman, it would have been difficult to survive such a childhood so replete with abuse and neglect and its ensuing trauma. There were many indications, many attempts at coming out that Manning made to no avail. While she attempted to raise the issue of her gender dysphoria many times, she was not met with either kindness, understanding or effective treatment. While it is never good to apply the “what if” of hindsight to a situation, it is necessary to do so here. One can say in retrospect, I wonder what might have happened had she been met with love and acceptance; what might have happened had her transgenderism been met with understanding and treatment? As a society, we in America, are in some ways just as responsible for Manning’s crimes as she is. Were she able to serve openly, were she able to receive treatment for her gender dysphoria (as military personnel in Canada are), what might have become of her service to the country? It is clear from reading the background story that the military had many opportunities to intervene, and intervened only in a partial way, a stop gap manner, letting Manning increasingly spin out of control. This was in some sense all preventable, and we are all in that same sense responsible for what happened. There is certainly enough information readily available to military mental health providers and physicians that Manning’s gender dysphoria could have, should have been directly addressed early on in her military career. (continued on page 29)

Trans View #116 continued It would be my suggestion that readers keep informed about Manning’s case and support her right to medical treatment while serving her sentence. If you read her statement to the court, you will be, I think, moved by what she said and her insight into the complexities of her situation and her ability to take responsibility for her actions despite the role her own trauma played in the commission of her crimes. It is my hope that Manning’s case hastens to move the military to adopt policies permitting transgender people to serve, and that they provide appropriate treatment, including surgery. Adopting such a policy is not anything difficult to do. The difficult part is undoing the heterosexist paradigm in the military, bringing their medical personnel into the 21st Century about transgenderism being a biological not psychiatric condition. The Army’s statements about Man-

ning’s transsexualism have been particularly harsh, judgmental and out of step with current medical understanding of transgenderism. That only serves at this point in time to make the Army look the fool. What harm would come if they allowed Manning to serve her time in a women’s federal prison (as all women military convicts do) while the courts decide her case? What plan does the military have at Ft. Leavenworth to keep Manning safe from abuse It is my hope that on National Coming Out Day, we fully remember the sacrifice everyone makes in attempting to come out. Sometimes--more often than not these days-it is a celebration. And sometimes attempting to come out brings pain and shame and irrevocable harm. If anything, this Coming Out Day, we must rededicate ourselves to more of the former and to eradicating the latter. It would be my suggestion that read-

ers keep informed about Manning’s case and support her right to medical treatment while serving her sentence. As my 74 year old Republican neighbor said to me: “If someone is willing to place themselves in harm’s way out of a devotion to serving their country, why should we care what kind of body they have?” Indeed. Now if we could all follow her example and welcome transgender service members to serve out and openly. Until next time...T Rev. Moonhawk River Stone of RiverStone Consulting is an Interfaith Minister, transgender activist, writer, educator, consultant, keynote speaker and psychotherapist in private practice for over 25 years experience and with extensive expertise in all aspects of transgender policy and heatlh.

Trans View #115, A Postscript :High Hopes & California Dreamin’... By Moonhawk River Stone © 2013 As luck would have it, the ink was not quite dry on the September CommUNITY when on August 12, 2013, California Governor Jerry Brown signed into a law a bill protecting California transgender students in their use of sex segregated facilities in schools. The bill would provide transgender students access to sport teams and facilities that are in alignment with their gender identity, including the use of the bathroom which corresponds to their gender identity. And this is access is granted regardless of how they might still be listed in the official school records. This is the first time that we know of where access to the correct facilities for transgender students (or adults for that matter) has

been legislated, and transgender students will be protected against discrimination. While this is ideally a good move--guaranteeing access is very proactive and anti discriminatory and sends a very clear message that transgender people deserve the same access as everyone else, and that we are who we say we are. A drawback to the bill is that it does not specifically state a policy whereby the privacy of all students in protected both transgender and cisgender (non transgender) is protected from unavoidable contact. This oversight has been grabbed by the bigots and is being turned into a major issue, where they are sensationalizing that cisgender students will be “forced” to share facilities with transgender people

and be exposed to them (literally). I cannot imagine that all schools will be respecting the privacy of all their students. However, the bigots already have an online petition going to collect the required 50,000 signatures to place a referendum on the ballot to repeal the law. My comment: when are they going to pass a law expressing forbidding the referendum process to be used for the purposes of discrimination, hatred and bigotry? It’ll be interesting to see how this plays out here in New York State as we continue to advocate for the passage of GENDA. Until next time...T

ASK THE LAWYER

By Geri Pomerantz

Dear Geri: My wife and I were married in New York State. We are now expecting our first child. My wife is pregnant by donor insemination, with my enthusiastic support and consent. Over 10 years ago, she joined with another woman in a registered domestic partnership (RDP) in California. They went their separate ways years before we were married, but didn’t officially dissolve or terminate the RDP. Is this something we should be concerned about? Short Answer: Yes. I recommend that your wife and her ex-partner officially dissolve the RDP as soon as possible. You also might want to consider re-affirming your marriage vows, just in case the existence of the RDP at the time of your marriage negatively impacts on the validity of your marriage. You might also want to consider an agreement between you and your wife with respect to parentage and custody of your soon to be born child in the very unfortunate event that you separate in the future. At any rate, I urge you to do a step parent adoption to protect your relationship with the child. Finally, you should consult in person with an attorney about your specific circumstances for specific advice on how to best protect your rights and the rights of your soon to be born child. Long Answer: Inequality, amongst other things, is confusing and complicated. There are a few different issues here to consider. First, a marriage to someone who is married to someone else at the time, is a void marriage. Because of the prohibition against bigamy, a crime in NY, you can’t marry a second time unless the first marriage was terminated by divorce or annulment, or your first spouse died. If there is a dispute between the first and second spouse (for example, as to survivor benefits upon death of the mutual wife), there is a presumption that the second marriage is the valid marriage. However, that presumption can be rebutted by the first wife showing that her marriage was never terminated. This is why the clerks in NYS have an obligation to ask marriage license applicants about prior marriages and divorce, and may require production of documentation of divorce or death.

Note that there is no prohibition on marrying your present spouse more than once. For a variety of reasons, some married couples chose to reaffirm their commitment to each other in this way. For political reasons, many same sex couples married, or joined in other legal relationships like civil unions and domestic partnership, as those rights became available in different states. It is important to note that in the event these couples separate, they must dissolve each and every such marriage and/or other legal relationship status. Your wife was not previously married, because she couldn’t marry her ex at the time they entered the RDP. The RDP, however, gives the same rights and obligations of marriage under California law. However, while NY may recognize the rights and obligations afforded to RDPs by California, NY will not consider the RDP the same as a marriage. Indeed, while it may have most of the rights and benefits, it is not a marriage. In most instances, the federal government does not afford the rights of marriage to RDP partners, even after the Windsor decision. There is no law in NY that prohibits marrying someone who is already a partner in a RDP or civil union to someone else. There is no existing law in NY that determines such a marriage to be void. In some of those states where the only legal status for same sex couples is civil union, there may be a requirement that neither of the parents be married to or in a civil union with another person. See for example, New Jersey’s civil union statute. In Vermont, where there were previously civil unions for same sex couples, there is a restriction on marrying someone who is joined in a civil union to someone else. Bottom line, it is questionable whether the marriage here is void. You, your wife, or her ex could bring a lawsuit to declare the marriage void, or conversely to declare the marriage to be a valid marriage. I do believe it would be the first such action in NY. While the marriage here might not be void, there is another problem. In New York, as in most states, children who are born to one spouse during a marriage are presumed to be the child of the other spouse. In other words, the child is the legitimate child of both spouses, and both spouses have equal parental rights and obligations if there is no court order to the contrary. When a child

is born to a married woman through artificial insemination, performed by a medical professional, and with the written consent of her spouse, both spouses are deemed the child’s parents. Under California law, a child born during a RDP is presumed to be the child of both parents, just as if the parents were married to each other. The same is true of a child born during a Vermont civil union, and there are similar laws in other states with civil union or other similar legal relationship statutes. In a custody case in NY, the courts will look to the state law where the civil union or domestic partnership was celebrated to determine if the RDP partner has parental rights. In this situation, the ex could be determined to have parental rights (and obligations) to a child born during the RDP. Thus, it is really important that the RDP be dissolved formally. There are other potential problems with the continued RDP. Your wife here, and her ex, have continuing obligations to each other under California law. Here are a few examples. Arguably, if your wife acquires property, the RDP partner has a claim to that property in California. If the RDP partner is unable to support herself, she may be entitled to alimony against your wife. If the ex has a child, she may be able to get child support from your wife. If the ex incurs debt and defaults, her creditors may come after your wife for payment. If your wife is in the hospital, the ex may have rights to see her or make medical decisions about her. And, if your wife dies, the ex may try to assert claims to survivor benefits or inheritance rights. If your NY marriage is void, or declared void, because of the RDP, any of the rights which flow from the marriage, including parental rights to your child, may disappear. Reaffirming your vows, with a new marriage license, after the RDP is officially dissolved, would be one way to address that problem. I also recommend that you and your wife do a written agreement, in which you agree what the date of your marriage is in the event of dissolution, for purposes of distributing property and other financial issues. In this agreement, you can also affirm your agreement and understanding that your child to be born is a child of your marriage, and your intention that you both have equal rights to be her parents.

ASK THE LAWYER

(continued)

Even if the RDP does not result in a void marriage in NY or the other marriage recognition states, there are currently over 30 states where your same sex marriage is not recognized. Of course, in our post Windsor country (See Community August 2013) the federal government will recognize a valid marriage for all purposes. But in the majority of states in this country, your parental rights which flow from the marriage will still not likely be recognized.

If you and your family are considering relocation or travel to any of the non-recognition states, it is critically important that you adopt your child to preserve your legal relationship to her. This is called a second parent, or step parent adoption, and your wife will also retain her parental rights. Moreover, it is recommended that you adopt your child to preserve your parental rights in the event of separation. This would be critically important, if, for example, your wife moves with the child to a non-recognition state in an effort to defeat your rights to custody. Hopefully, in the

Money Matters: To Prepay

Not

Prepay

by,

There are many reasons to pay off a mortgage early. Among others, these include aversion to debt, wanting to use the mortgage payment amount for something else, or just wanting to increase cash flow. When on a fixed income this becomes increasingly important. In retirement, the way to save money is not to spend it. If the home is paid off, cash is left on the table for other purposes and lowers the monthly income need. Fixed rate mortgages collect the principal (amount owed) and interest in such a way that at the inception of the loan, a higher portion of the payment is applied to interest. A much smaller portion goes toward principal. In later years, as the principal is paid off and less interest is due, the portion sways to higher principal payoffs until at the last payment a nominal amount is interest and the majority portion is principal. According to Bankrate.com, when one extra principal payment per year is added to

The legal rights of LGBTQ families are an ever-changing landscape, to be addressed monthly in this column. The material in this article is provided for informational purposes only and is not intended to give legal advice, and should not substitute for the independent advice of counsel.

Thomas J. Walling CFPÂŽ

your mortgage, the time to pay off a 30 year mortgage is reduced by 5-6 years. Yes, prepaying will take time off the mortgage obligation and you will save some interest, but the bank is also a winner here. If you make extra payments toward the end of the loan while the majority of the interest has already been paid, the bank really wins, as the benefits of prepaying are greater when the loan is young due to compounding.

Mortgage interest rates are at historically low levels. Odds are that they will be going up relatively soon. A common question seems to be as to whether or not prepaying mortgages makes sense. As with everything, there are pros and cons associated with this decision. Everyone has different attitudes and priorities regarding debt.

very near future, such burdensome legal proceedings will not be necessary to protect our relationships to our children in every state in the country.

Extra payments are for principal only and come off the principal of the loan. Now comes the tricky part. Yes, you will save some money in interest by prepaying, but the bank could also be a winner. If you are prepaying the principal, you are allowing the bank the higher interest portion early payments. What this does is reduce the loan payment time at the same interest rate. The lender has a shorter loan with the same interest rate (a plus for them). Sometimes, the lender will even charge to do this by selling biweekly payment schedules which add a payment per year. Think of paying off your mortgage as an investment. Real estate is an illiquid investment requiring a sale of your home to cash in. Does it make more sense to invest that money or prepay the mortgage? Common sense dictates that if you believe you can make more money investing than prepaying perhaps prepaying is not the answer. One thing to factor in when making this decision is the tax benefits of interest on a mortgage. If you are in 25% tax bracket, the benefits should be considered as net. If the interest rate is, for example, 6% on your mortgage, the truer number would usually be around 4.5% as the tax benefits should count. All other factors aside, If you think you can make more than 4.5% after tax on other investments, you should probably

invest that money in something other than prepaying. Inflation has run at 2-3% per year. As time goes on, the mortgage amount stays the same as other things inflate. So, the amount of money you pay today is less than the payment would be in 10 years, factoring in inflation. If you have a low rate mortgage, perhaps paying it off does not make sense. Think of it as cheap money. Remember, however, that if you pay your taxes and homeowners insurance through escrow, these things will inflate your overall mortgage payment over time. So, as with most other things, whether to prepay your mortgage early is a personal decision. Things like security, retirement, future cash flow, and alternate investing are all factors. There could also be prepayment penalties. Seek the advice of a professional before making these decisions. These are but a few of the variables that should be considered. Weigh out the pros and cons and make an informed decision. Thomas J. Walling CFPÂŽ is a Registered Representative and an Investment Advisor Representative of, and offer securities and investment advisory services through, Tower Square Securities, Inc. (TSS), (Member FINRA & SIPC) and a Registered Investment Adviser. Branch address: 235 Lark St., Suite #43, Albany, NY 12210. He is also a past presenter at the Pride Center on financial affairs affecting theGLBT community as well as for SAGE of NYC. Tom is past president of the board of directors of The Albany Damien Center, Inc as well as Our Brotherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Keeper Foundation. He can be reached at his office at 518.878.1294 orThomas.Walling@tssimail.

GENDERF*CK: Chelsea Manning, Identity Control By Drew Cordes

I said in my last column that I’d write about trans* narratives this month. Then Chelsea Manning happened. Manning was sentenced to 35 years in prison for leaking documents that shed light on war crimes and other atrocities committed by the U.S. (Compare this to Michael Behenna, who received 25 years for the 2008 killing of an unarmed Iraqi man.) The next day, Manning publicly articulated her desire to transition, and identified herself by the name Chelsea. The government used Manning’s transness to deflect attention from its actions. Manning’s gender identity was discussed as a liability in her court-martial. Her own attorney framed the disclosure of her gender identity as a clear signal to negligent Army officials that she was not well and could not be trusted with the access she had, and therefore not entirely to blame. The Army also released a photo to the world revealing Manning presenting as female.

Were the charges just? If the government really did commit war crimes and Manning helped call attention to it, is her sentence retribution? Is the government making an example of Manning to reassert its authority and intimidate possible opposition in the future? Should we organize and demand our government stop this? Shouldn’t we do someth- ... Wait, did you see that photo of Manning in the wig and lipstick? She says she’s transgender? How does that work in prison? Can she get hormones? Why are some outlets using male pronouns and others are using female? Wait, are my tax dollars going to help a criminal become a woman? … Effective distraction, yes? The Army put Manning in a double-bind. If she didn’t come out as female, she might not receive proper care; and the discourse would be beyond her control, invalidating her act of ethical protest as that of a distressed and disturbed individual. If she did come out as female, she could attempt to own her identity and actions as legitimate, but the story would then become her transness, her pronouns, how she will transition, her appearance, trans inclusion in the military, i.e., anything but war crimes, secrecy, and oppression. The Army dragged Manning out of the closet and forced her to publicly adopt trans* identity, whether she was ready or not. If the state feels its power threatened, it will do anything it must to maintain it. It will manipulate and restrict the gover-

and

Government Violence

nance you have over your own body. It will exploit and other your identity. And in some cases, like Manning’s, it will dictate who you are, and then, it will use who you are against you for its own benefit. I hope this serves as a wake-up call to the LGBTQI community. We must not be fighting for the right to be included at the table of oppressors. We must not be gauging our fight for justice and equality by our acceptance into institutions such as a military-industrial complex. We must examine the functions of the institutions we’re fighting for access to, and determine whether we truly want to endorse their effects with our participation. LGB folks were welcomed into the military a few years back, and some trans* people are still fighting for inclusion in it. Take a good look, folks. This is what you’re fighting for. If it is deemed necessary, the state will use your queerness, your transness, any difference you have against you to create discord, justify its actions against others and against you, and maintain its control -- exactly as it has done to Manning. It will use everything it can against you to defend the indefensible. It will abuse you to justify abusing others. Do we really want to be part of that? Albany resident Drew Cordes identifies as queer, trans, and genderqueer, and is a part of the trans* social justice group Transgender Advocates of the Capital Region. Reprinted with permission of The Bilerico Project: www.bilerico.com.

Welcoming Congregations

Join Us In Exploring Your Spiritual Side At One Of The Welcoming Congregations Below: Community Congregational Church (UCC) 221 Columbia Tpke, Rensselaer, NY www.clintonheightsucc.org Community Reformed Church of Colonie 701 Sand Creek Road, Colonie, NY www.coloniereformed.org (518)869-5589 Congregation Agudat Achim (Conservative) 2117 Union Street, Schenectady, NY www.agudatachim.org (518) 393-9211 Congregation B’nai Shalom (Reform) 420 Whitehall Road, Albany, NY www.bnaishalom.albany.ny.us (518) 482-5283 Congregation Berith Shalom (Reform) 167 Third Street, Troy, NY www.berithshalom.com (518)272-8872 Congregation Beth Emeth (Reform) 100 Academy Road, Albany, NY www.bethemethalbany.org (518)4369761 Congregation Gates of Heaven (Reform) 842 Ashmore Avenue, Schenectady, NY www.cgoh.org (518)374-8173

Emmanuel Baptist Church 275 State Street, Albany, NY www.emmanuelalbany.net (518)465-5161 First Church in Albany 110 North Pearl Street, Albany, NY www.firstchurchinalbany.org (518)463-4449 First Congregational Church of Albany UCC & NACCC 405 Quail Street, Albany, NY www.firstcongregationalalbany.org / (518)482-4580 First Lutheran Church 181 Western Avenue, Albany, NY www.FirstLutheranAlbany.org (518)463-1326 First Presbyterian Church 362 State Street, Albany, NY www.firstpresalbany.org (518)449-7332 First Reformed Church 8 North Church Street, Schenectady, NY www.1streformed.com First Unitarian Society of Schenectady 1221 Wendell Avenue, Schenectady, NY www.fussonline.org (518)374-4446

Good Shepherd Lutheran Church 501 Albany Shaker Road, Loudonville, NY www.goodshepherdchurchloudonville.org (518)458-1562 Holy Trinity National Catholic Church 405 Washington Avenue, Albany, NY www.NCCofA.org/holytrin.html (518)434-8861 Journey United Church of Christ 500 Kenwood Blvd, Delmar , NY www.journeyucc.com Saratoga Springs United Methodist Church 175 Fifth Avenue, Saratoga Springs, NY www.saratogaspringsumc.org / (518)584-3720 Saint Aelred’s Priory and Retreat House (National Catholic) 670 Bunker Hill Road Northville, NY Tel. 518-863-8086 or 518-434-8861 staelredpriory@aol.com St. Andrews Episcopal Church Main at Madison Avenue, Albany, NY www.standrewsalbany.org / (518)489-4747 St. John’s Lutheran Church 160 Central Avenue, Albany, NY www.stjohnsalbany.org (518)465-7545

Congregation Ohav Shalom (Conservative) 113 New Krumkill Road, Albany, NY www.ohavshalom.org

First Unitarian Universalist Society of Albany 405 Washington Avenue, Albany, NY www.albanyuu.org (518)463-7135

Congregation Temple Sinai (Reform) 509 Broadway, Saratoga Springs, NY www.templesinai-saratogasprings.org (518) 584-8730

First United Methodist Church 603 State Street, Schenectady, NY www.gbgm-umc.org/schenectady (518)374-4403

Eastern Parkway United Methodist Church 943 Palmer Avenue, Schenectady, NY www.easternparkway.weebly.com (518)374-4306

First United Presbyterian Church 1915 Fifth Avenue, Troy, NY www.unitedprestroy.org (518)272-2771

Unity Church in Albany 21 King Avenue, Albany, NY www.unitychurchinalbany.org (518)4533603

St George’s Episcopal Church 30 North Ferry St., Schenectady www.stgeorgesschenectady.org

Friends Meeting (Quaker) 727 Madison Avenue, Albany, NY (518) 436-8812

Woodstock Jewish Congregation (Reconstructionist) 1682 Glasco Turnpike, Woodstock, NY www.wjcshul.org (845)246-1671

Unitarian Universalist Congregation of Saratoga 624 North Broadway, Saratoga Springs, NY www.saratoga-uu.org (518)584-1555

Proud To Be Open! Affirming! Welcoming! Joyous! 33

To Be

Blessing: Redeeming God –

and

Faith

By Nadya Lawson

almost perfectly articulated my own stalled experience of religious faith: God picks favorites. If you aren’t a favorite you’re cursed. If you’re cursed you’re beyond redemption. I had been stuck in that place for more than 30 years.

“He kicked them out forever?!” My four-year-old son was wide-eyed and indignant. “They couldn’t go back, even if they were sorry?” The year was 2004, it was bedtime, and my first attempt to introduce “J” to the Christian Bible was an obvious failure. I had determined that I wanted him to have a religious foundation, even if my own faith was barely existent. Bible stories for children seemed a safe bet, as I had loved them as a child, reading them over and over again to myself, to my little brother, and to whatever unfortunate friend happened to visit on a day I decided to play Sunday School. They were filled with drama and imagery, and I assumed that my very dramatic child would be absorbed by the picture of Adam and Eve and the beautiful garden. Not so much. “Why was that tree even there if they couldn’t eat any of the fruit,” he demanded. I agreed with him. So I shifted his attention to In The Night Kitchen, and resolved to try again. The next night, surrounded by J’s army of beloved stuffed animals, I told him the story of Noah’s ark. “God killed everybody?!” was his incredulous and terrified response. “Even the children? What about the good people who didn’t even know what was happening? God’s mean!” I wondered if I had somehow leaked my own feelings in the telling. J had

I had many reasons for wanting J to have a spiritual foundation, but chief among them was security about his place in the world. I wanted him to feel that he was surrounded by love, not only coming from me and our circle of chosen family, but from God, from the very Universe. He was three when I adopted him, and I was committed to reinforcing the idea that he was cherished and inherently valuable. In classic parent style, I had projected my own longing for this affirmation. How could I teach this kid anything about God when I felt so estranged? The estrangement began when, at the age of 10, I decided that I should read the actual Bible. A beloved librarian had given me a copy as a 5th grade graduation present, and I started reading it on my grandmother’s stoop, a giant glass of Kool-Aid next to me. By the time the Israelites made it to the Promised Land, I was beside myself. Everything I read pointed to favoritism, exclusion, and extreme punishment. What was so wrong with Cain’s offering, I wondered. The Egyptians didn’t stand a chance, it seemed to me, God had a point to prove and even if they relented, God changed their minds back again. The perfectly ignorant Canaanites were slaughtered so their land could go to somebody else. Making a mistake got you killed or turned into a pillar of salt. How unfair, how arbitrary! And I knew I was on the wrong side somehow. As the years passed, I knew I was stuck with a 10-year-old’s rage. I understood that the Bible was a sacred text but also a political and historical document, written by men. I understood the impossibility of taking it literally, the vagaries of translation. None of this mat-

tered. I wanted to believe, but didn’t know how I could or what I should. And the politics of faith – the evil done in the name of Christianity, the suppression of women, the justification of slavery and colonization – all built the wall up even higher. Coming into my own as a lesbian sealed the deal – I was choosing to be damned. Social justice activism took the place of religion in my head and heart. It felt righteous, gave me community, affirmed almost all of who I was. But the feelings of anger and outsiderness persisted. Now I had a kid, and, in just two nights, I had set him up to enter into my world of suffering – the opposite of what I most wanted for him. If I truly wanted to present a caring Universe, a loving God, to my boy, I had to somehow get unstuck and experience it for myself. So I did. As I write this, I am looking forward to beginning a four year course of study, an exploration of the Bible and theology and the evolution of the Christian faith. The details of how are not so remarkable; it took time, a spiritual direction group, and a spiritual advisor who helped me find that angry 10-year-old girl and figure out how to help her. I had recognized my son’s anger and my own for what it was – grief – and, under that, a longing so deep it could only be a call from a universe longing for me. And surprisingly, my overall attitude towards the Bible hasn’t changed all that much. I take it with a gigantic can of salt and a lot more context, anchoring myself in the simple but profound call to love. As for J, I now tell him stories of people fighting for justice and working for peace. We look for examples of love in action every day. I think he’ll be okay. Nadya Lawson is a member of St. Andrew’s Episcopal Church in Albany. She is a longtime social justice activist, and serves on the boards of Holding Our Own and The Women’s Building.

Pride Center Special Events Wednesday, October 2: Board of Directors Meeting, 6pm. The Board meets the first Wednesday of every month at the Center. All meetings are open to the public to observe for the first half of the meeting. Thursday, October 3: GSA Network Event , 4:30-6p. Come together with students and faculty throughout the Capital Region to get your student group in gear! Connect, learn what other schools are doing, and give advice on how to make schools safer for all students! Thursday, October 3: THRIVE Youth Group (Ages 16-24), 6-7:30pm. THRIVE will focus on positive social interaction, health, and transitioning into adulthood. THRIVE is free, confidential and interactive. Space is limited and an intake is required by October 3. Friday, October 4: 1st Friday at the Romaine Brooks Gallery, 5-9pm. Come to the Romaine Brooks Gallery, the Pride Center’s very own art gallery! This month’s featured artist is Stephanie Slominski. Monday, October 7: Business Alliance LGBT Professionals Mix & Mingle, 5pm. 544 Delaware Ave, Albany. $5 suggested donation. Come meet up with friends, distribute business cards, and network with new contacts. Friday, October 11: CONNECT: Supporting Families of LGBTQ Youth, 7-8:30pm. Come together with parents, family members, and friends who have LGBTQ youth. Finding and extending support; building community. Every second Friday of the month. Thursday, October 17: College Student Night, 7-9pm. UAlbany Campus Center, Room 329, 1400 Washington Ave, Albany. Join your fellow local LGBTQ students for a night of socializing, networking, and getting to know the Pride Center. Free food and refreshments! Friday, October 18: Annual Awards Gala, 6pm. Century House, Latham. The premier Pride Center event, bringing together community leaders, friends and allies to honor the achievements of a distinguished group of individuals for contributions to the community. Sunday, October 20: Vintage Pride Potluck, 1-3 pm. First Presbyterian Church, 362 State Street, Albany. Bring a dish to share and enjoy drinks and dessert provided by the Pride Center. A casual social opportunity for LGBTQ people 55+. Sunday, October 20: Movie Night, 6:30-8:30 pm. Sunday, October 27: Supper Sunday, 5-9pm. The Pride Center’s monthly program that offers a free, delicious community meal home-cooked by our fabulous volunteer Mike C. the last Sunday of each month. Thursday, October 31: Halloween Party, 6-9pm. Join us in the Rainbow Café for a spooktacular evening of Halloween sweets and music. Costumes encouraged!

All events take place at the Pride Center (332 Hudson Avenue, Albany) unless otherwise noted. For more information call (518) 462-6138.

October 2013

Pride Center Affiliate Events Sundays, October 1 & 20: Bisexual Potluck Brunch, 11a-1pm. Pride Center, 332 Hudson Ave, Albany. Come for great brunch and a meet other bisexual members of the Capital Region community. Wednesday, October 9: “Live from the Living Room” Poetry Open Mic Night, 7-9pm. Pride Center, 332 Hudson Ave, Albany. This month’s featured poet is Carol Jewell. Wednesday, October 16: LGBT Book Club, 7-9 pm. Pride Center, 332 Hudson Ave, Albany. The book this month is The Fall of Kings by Ellen Kushner. Thursday, October 17: Saratoga Pride Lesbian Breakfast, 7:30am. Country Corner Café on High Rock, Saratoga. Latecomers welcome.

Community Events Wednesday, October 2: Living Soulfully presents: The Journey to Wholeness, 7pm. Workshop exploring the health and wellness of the mind, body, and spirit. Email info@livingsoulfullycrny.org for location. Wednesdays, October 2 & 16: In Our Own Voices’ Out The Closet I Am Support Group (Ages 21-30),* 6-8pm. For more info visit www.facebook.com/ outtheclosetiam Wednesdays, October 9 & 23: In Our Own Voices’ TransCare,* 6-7:30pm. TransCare is a social group for transgender POC to share their voices about community issues. October 11-14: Fall Stewardship Weekend at Camp Little Notch. 744 Sly Pond Rd, Fort Ann. The weekend is an incredible opportunity for Little Notch supporters to gain an un‐ derstanding of how to care for CLN and help make sure camp is put to rest for the winter. *All In Our Own Voices events take place at 245 Lark Street, Albany unless noted. For more info, call (518) 432-4188 or email info@inourownvoices.org

H If you would like to have your events posted in the CommUNITY newsletter, please visit our website at www.capitalpridecenter.org and click on the events tab and select calendar of events. From there you can submit your own event. Or email lcudlitz@capitalpridecenter.org. Events must be submitted for approval by the 5th of the month.

We’re Proud to Support These Businesses as They Support the LGBT Community Members as of July 31, 2013

AIDS Council of Northeast New York Athos Restaurant Bombers Schenectady Broughton Properties/ Keller Williams Realty Buenau's Opticians Central Avenue BID Charles F. Lucas Confectionery and Wine Bar Connections Psychotherapy Consumer Optical Crisafulli Bros.Plumbing & Heating Contractors, Inc Customericity, LLC GayAlbanyOnline.com Geri Pomerantz, Esq Grappa '72 Ristorante Hokkaido Albany Interim HealthCare

James W. Leone, State Farm Agent Joseph Dalton / Prudential Manor Homes Joseph Roche Journey United Church of Christ L&P Media Latimer/Stroud, LLP Mark D. Witecki, CPA CFP CFE Ronnie Mangione / Merrill Lynch Security Plumbing & Heating Supply Skylands Services, INC Steve Cook / State Farm Insurance Sunrise Management and Consulting The Point Restaurant Thomas J. Walling/Tower Square Securities, Inc. Tri City Rentals

Come and meet up with friends , distribute your business cards, and make important business contacts.

Don’t Miss the Regions Fastest Growing LGBT Professionals Mixer: NETWORK. DINE.MINGLE. Monday, October 7, 6-8pm

Plan now for our next LGBT Professionals Mixer– and dinner! After the mixer stay and have dinner and Mingle will donate 25% of your entire bill to the Pride Center!

Mingle | 544 Delaware Ave | Albany $5 suggested donation For More Information or To Join Visit:

www.capitalpridecenter.org/resources/business-alliance/

QueerEngineer Get to know us & how you can support LGBTQ* students in science, technology, engineering, & mathematics. /QueerEngineer

@QueerEngineer

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