Community (vol 3 iss 9) by Pride Center of the Capital Region

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Friday, November 20, 2015 \ 6:30pm Empire State Plaza Convention Center

Surrounded by glitz and glamour, relive the sights and sounds of vintage Las Vegas and the Copacabana Lounge!

Get your tickets today! VIP Tickets $150 Standard Tickets $85 $100 at the door

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Media Sponsors: All Over Albany, B95.5fm, CBS6, Mannix Marketing Inc.

FEATURES Celebrate 45 Years as the Community’s Center with a look at improved accessibility!

Pride Center Gala in Pictures

pg. 6

Sex Ed Corner

pg. 9

Understanding Identities: Two-Spirit

pg. 10

Resources for and About Two-Spirit and Other Indigenous People pg. 11 What's Wrong with Cultural Appropriation? pg. 12 What is Cultural Appropriation? pg. 13 CommUNITY Intros

pg. 15

Pride Center Committed To Passage of GENDA Law pg. 17 Hidden Abuse by Elizabeth Condrey

"There is no such thing as a single-issue struggle, because we do not live single-issue lives" ~Audre Lorde Photo Credits: Cover © Pilar ArthurSnead / Photographic Expressions This page & opposite © Jay Zhang / Jay Zhang Photography

pg. 23

November / December 2015 Volume 3, Issue 9 CONTENTS

COLUMNS To Be a Blessing Prisoners, Queers, and the Power of Grace by Nadya Lawson pg. 19 Trans View Transfiguration: Let Me Count the Ways I Cope by Moonhawk Riverstone pg. 20 Ask Mark Your Tax Questions by Mark D. Witecki pg. 25 Out in the Garden Companions in the Garden by Judith Fetterley pg. 27 The Fashionable and the Frivolous The F-Word by Alan Bennet Ilagan pg. 28 Here’s Guffman Fits Like a Glove

Patrick White pg. 33

Michael Cooks and You Can Too Classic Pumpkin Pie by Michael Meade pg. 34

NEWS,UPDATES & INFORMATION Pride Center of the Capital Region Announces New Executive Director pg. 7 From the Editor’s Desk pg. 7 Governor Cuomo Announces New Regulations to Protect Transgender New Yorkers Statewide pg. 17 NYCLU Applauds New Discrimination Protections for Transgender New Yorkers pg. 17 Documentary Review pg. 31 Affiliates Calendar pg. 35 Weekly Events Calendar pg. 36 Special Events Calendar pg. 37 CommUNITY Calendar pg. 38 Advertisers Index pg. 30

2015 Pride Center Gala

On Friday October 16, 2015, over 500 community members gathered to honor the individuals, businesses, and organizations that worked to create a more welcoming Capital Region for the lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer community. Hosted by Jaye McBride and Steve Ammerman, it was an amazing evening that also celebrated the programs and services of the Pride Center, showcased performances by the Albany Gay Men’s Chorus and Bell’s Roar, and raised much need funds for the Center’s continuing operations.

photographs: Jay Zhang Photography

see more pictures at: http://jayzhangphotography.pixieset.com/pridecentergala2015/ 6

2015 Pride Center Gala

PRIDE CENTER OF THE CAPITAL REGION ANNOUNCES NEW EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR The Board of Directors of the Pride Center of the Capital Region are pleased to announced that after a five month search, they have appointed Michael Weidrich the new Executive Director & CEO of the Pride Center. Michael brings years of experience to the position both professionally and as an LGBTQ activist. Says Board President Patricia Wood, “In his dedicated service to the Pride Center, Michael Weidrich has demonstrated the leadership, vision and creativity to ensure that the Pride Center will thrive in the coming years. We are delighted to name him our Executive Director effective October 1, 2015.” Michael has been an LGBTQ activist for nearly 25 years, having started demonstrating and rallying on the campus of Syracuse University, and having participated in the 1993 Million Gay March on Washington DC. Since then, he has participated in events in Toronto, Buffalo, Rochester, Syracuse, Ithaca, New York City and Albany, NY. Michael’s affiliation with the Pride Center of the Capital Region began in 2006 when he started volunteering as the Gallery Manager of the Romaine Brooks Gallery and founded the monthly “1st Friday” event in Albany to promote the work of the Center. In 2008, Michael joined the Board of Directors and was a part of the rebranding committee that facilitated the Center’s name change from the Capital District Gay & Lesbian Community Council to the Pride Center of the Capital Region. Since 2012, Michael has served on the staff of the Center, going from being the Finance & Grants Administrator, to Director of Operations, to Deputy Director and since May have been serving as Interim Executive Director. Michael brings 20 years of business administration experience to his new role, having worked in both the for-profit arena and the notfor-profit community. He has held notable positions such as the Director of Corporate Development at the Albany Institute of History & Art and Executive Director of the Lark Street Business Improvement District. Michael is a recipient of the Business Review’s 40 Under 40 Award, the Albany County Convention and Visitors Bureau’s Hospitality Excellent Award, the Pride Center of the Capital Region Volunteer of the Year Award, and the Lark Street Business Improvement District Award. He is also a graduate of the Albany-Colonie Chamber of Commerce’s Leadership Tech Valley program. Michael holds a Masters in Business Administration and an Advanced Graduate Certificate in Not-for-Profit Management both from the College of Saint Rose; and a Bachelors of Fine Arts from Syracuse University.

marked with great transition for the Pride Center, great victories with the Supreme Court ruling on Marriage Equality and Governor Cuomo’s executive action for new regulations to protect all transgender New Yorkers, to the defeat of the Gender Expression Nondiscrimination Act in the NYS Senate again and the dozens of reported murders this year of trans women.

F R O M T H E E D I T O R ’ S D E S K What an incredible year it’s been! If you had told me a year ago that I would be sitting in the Executive Director’s seat now, I would not have believed you. But sometimes, actually often times, the path life takes us is not a straight line or the expected route. So as we come to the end of 2015, we bring to a close a year

As we look ahead at 2016, I am excited to start a new chapter for the Pride Center. While we wrap up this 45th anniversary year, we are already looking at the 50th anniversary of Stonewall in 2019 and the 50th anniversary of the Pride Center in 2020. And on the journey, we will continue to advocate for basic human rights desperately needed by those forgotten in our community like homeless LGBTQ youth, transgender discrimination and violence, high quality affordable healthcare, senior services, dignity and safety for all. We have come so far but the fight goes on! Be well and be empowered!

Michael Weidrich Executive Director & CEO

Know Your Status! Get Tested!

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On-Site at the Pride Center 332 Hudson Avenue, 2nd Floor Albany, NY 12210 (Between Lark & Dove Streets) * FREE CONDOMS & SAFER-SEX SUPPLIES AVAILABLE * CALL: 518.462.6138 EMAIL: CENTERYOUTH@CAPITALPRIDECENTER.ORG VISIT: WWW.CAPITALPRIDECENTER.ORG

Womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Social Network Gatherings

Informal gatherings for women to meet old friends and new!

Wednesday, November 18 & Wednesday, December 16 5:30- 8 PM

Midtown Tap and Tea Room on the Avenue 289 New Scotland Ave, Albany, NY 12208 $10 Donations to offset costs appreciated

U n d e r s ta n d i n g I d e n t i t i e s : T wo -S p i r i t

RESOURCES FOR AND ABOUT TWO-SPIRIT AND OTHER INDIGENOUS LGBTQ PEOPLE

Organizations East Coast Two Spirit Society – www.ec2ss.net In Our Own Voices, Albany - www.inourownvoices.org

For issue released in November

A special welcome for the holidays!

First United Presbyterian Church

A congregation dedicated to inclusiveness & social justice for the LGBTQ+ Community

1915 Fifth Ave., Troy 12180, 272-2771 10 AM Sunday Service Check our website for Advent & Christmas Eve Services: www.unitedprestroy.org

Youth Websites

Native Youth Sexual Health Network – www.nativeyouthsexualhealth.com

We R Native

- www.wernative.org/TopicDetails. aspx?Id=22&type=SexualHealth

Miranda and Daniel Health Justice When Did Indians Become Straight?: Kinship, the History of Sexuality, and Native Sovereignty, by Mark Rifkin

Looking for a Welcoming Community?

First United Presbyterian Church

Books

Sovereign Erotics: A Collection of Two-Spirit Literature, edited by Deborah

For issue released in December/January

A congregation dedicated to inclusiveness & social justice for the LGBTQ+ Community

1915 Fifth Ave., Troy 12180, 272-2771 10 AM Sunday Service Website: www.unitedprestroy.org

Rainbow flags in the sanctuary & outside

Podcast

Two-Spirit Podcast Series www.lgbtqhealth.ca/projects/two-spiritedpodcasts.php

Films

The Business of Fancy Dancing, 2002 Two Spirits, 2010

Lifestyle Photography is... Your Everyday, Your Important Moments, Your Once In A Lifetimes, Your Loved Ones. Lifestyle Photography for a Lifetime of Moments

Creating Affirming Spaces

Indigenous Ways of Knowing Tribal Equity Toolkit –www.graduate.lclark.edu/ live/files/12737-tribal-equity-toolkit

Reclaiming Our Voices: Two Spirit Health & Human Service Needs in NY – www.health.ny.gov/diseases/aids/reports/native_people/docs/reclaiming_our_voices.pdf

www.Facebook.com/ZhangPhotography www.JayZhangPhotography.com JZPhotographicServices@gmail.com

WHAT’S WRONG WITH CULTURAL APPROPRIATION? So, you just walked into a Halloween party. You think you’re wearing a kick-ass costume, but instead of giving you a compliment, someone tells you that your costume counts as cultural appropriation. And you think that’s a ridiculous accusation. You? Doing something racist? You didn’t have hateful intentions, so you don’t know how you could have a negative impact. Plus, nobody likes being told that they “can’t” do something, and you feel like this person’s saying you can’t wear your costume – even if you don’t mean to hurt anyone. So if you’re wondering what the big deal is about cultural appropriation, here’s some more information about what Cultural Appropriation Is (And Isn’t)… In short: Cultural appropriation is when somebody adopts aspects of a culture that’s not their own. But that’s only the most basic definition. A deeper understanding of cultural appropriation also refers to a particular power dynamic in which members of a dominant culture take elements from a culture of people who have been systematically oppressed by that dominant group. That’s why cultural appropriation is not the same as cultural exchange, when people share mutually with each other – because cultural exchange lacks that systemic power dynamic. It’s also not the same as assimilation, when marginalized people adopt elements of the dominant culture in order to survive conditions that make life more of a struggle if they don’t. Some say, for instance, that nonWestern people who wear jeans and Indigenous people who speak English are taking from dominant cultures, too. But marginalized groups don’t have the power to decide if they’d prefer to stick with their customs or try on the dominant culture’s traditions just for fun. When the last living survivors of massacred Indigenous tribes are fighting to save their language before it dies when they do, and Native students are suspended for speaking in their own Indigenous languages, mirroring the abusive US boarding schools that tried to wipe out Native American cultures up until the 1980s, it’s clear that not every person who speaks English does so by choice. In other words, context matters. Which means it’s not about saying that you, as an individual, are a bad person if you appropriate someone else’s culture. It’s a complicated issue that includes our histories, our current state of affairs, and our future, as we act to eliminate oppression, instead of perpetuating it. But we are encouraging you to be thoughtful about using things from other cultures, to consider the context, and learn about the best practices to show respect. Maybe you’ve worn a costume you didn’t know had a violent history, or you had the intention of honoring a culture in a way you didn’t realize was offensive. Or you learned about these oppressive histories, but you’re just now realizing that what you learned wasn’t even close to the entire truth. So now, what’s your next step in incorporating this information into your anti-racist work? Challenging stereotypes? Calling out appropriation when you see it? Spreading the word about the dire need to change the inaccurate way we learn about oppressed people’s struggles? At the very least, you know you have alternatives to disrespecting cultures that aren’t your own. Don’t keep making other cultures invisible under our society’s “melting pot” ambitions. Make room for all of us to thrive by having fun without oppression.

This article is an edited excerpt from http://everydayfeminism.com/

QUICK CLIPS

Prisoners, Queers, & the power of Grace (Being a blessing on pg. 19)

Facing the Holidays Head-on (A better way to cope pg. 20)

Don't be afraid to use the F-Word (Get fabulous on pg. 28)

Come Out...Find Something to Do (Capital Region LGBTQ Events calendars starting on pg. 35)

LETTERS TO THE EDITORmweidrich@capitalpridecenter.org

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COMMUNITY INTROS The Pride Center of the Capital Region is thrilled to announce the addition of two new members to the Pride Center staff! Deidre Dumpson joins Center staff as the new Street Outreach Worker and will be working with James Shultis, our Youth Program Manager, in serving the needs of our youth through our weekly drop-in space and programs. Luke Lavera joins the Center staff as the new Executive Assistant and will be working closely with the Center’s new Executive Director and support Center staff operations. Says Pride Center Executive Director & CEO Michael Weidrich “While it’s always hard to loose talented people, it’s exciting to build a new team with fresh ideas and adding great skills to the staff. Everything the Center does, from programs and services to the Capital PRIDE festival, depends on the strengths of its staff. These folks have taken the Center’s mission to heart and will be an integral part of brining the Pride Center up to the next level.”

5 Deidre Facts

HAS A BACHELOR’S OF ARTS IN WOMEN’S, GENDER AND SEXUALITY STUDIES. I completed my undergraduate degree in Women’s, Gender and Sexuality Studies at the University at Albany, Spring 2015! LOVES DOCUMENTARY FILMS & TV SERIES. I absolutely spend most of my past time watching documentaries and docu-series. I’m obsessed with crime and history so anything to do with either of those, I’m sold! EXECUTIVE BOARD MEMBER FOR CAMPUS PRIDE ADVISORY BOARD. I have officially began my time as the historian for the Campus Pride National Advisory Board. Campus Pride is the largest LGBTQA organization specifically catering to higher education institutions. The Advisory Board is led by young advocates, like me! IS A PROUD RADICAL BLACK QUEER FEMINIST. One thing that is extremely important to me is feminism! I like to tell people Black Feminism is my religion and Sister Outsider by Audre Lorde is my bible. I live, breath, eat, and sleep Black Feminism.

5 Luke Facts

HAS A BACHELOR OF ARTS IN CREATIVE ARTS. “I received my BA in Creative Arts with a focus in drawing and painting from Siena College in 2015.” WAS BORN IN PERU. I moved to the united states in 2004, when i was 11. I'm fluent in spanish. TV SHOWS HAVE TAKEN OVER HIS FREE TIME. Jane the Virgin is my new favorite show, right after Parks and Recreation. “Be the Leslie Knope of whatever it is that you do” is my motto. WOULD LOVE TO TRAVEL TO ALL 50 STATES AND TRAVEL TO EUROPE. Germany, Italy and Spain are at the top of my list. HE ENJOYS LISTENING TO PODCASTS WHILE DRIVING; my favorites are “Another Round" and "Good Job Brain!”

Read Luke's bio online:

www.capitalpridecenter.org/about-us/staff/ luke-lavera/

A DEVOTED LOVER OF GREEN AND TURTLES. Green is my favorite color and turtles are my favorite animal. Why? Green and Turtles represent stability, tranquility and steadiness. I’m a fiery Sagittarius and a Radical Feminist so I try to surround myself with these two things to remind me to slow down and enjoy life at times.

Read Deidre's bio online:

www.capitalpridecenter.org/about-us/staff/ deidre-dumpson/

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PRIDE CENTER COMMITTED TO PASSAGE OF GENDA LAW

gender rights movement. We applaud and support the Governor’s initiative to see that all LGBTQ people in the state have equal rights and equal respect. We are also very conscious this this executive action is not law and can be over turned by the next Governor. The Pride Center of the Capital Region Governor Andrew Cuomo’s will continue to fight for the passage of executive action declaring rights pro- the Gender Expression Non Discrimitections for all transgender New York- nation Act in the New York State Legers is a huge step forward for the trans- islature and is signed into law for the

full, complete and equal protection of all transgender New Yorkers. When the LGBTQ community was handed domestic partnership instead of marriage, we did not stop fighting for marriage equality and after it was passed in New York State in 2011, the fight went national until the Supreme Court win this year. The fight for Transgender Rights is no different and the Pride Center will not rest until GENDA becomes law.

Governor Cuomo Announces New Regulations to Protect Transgender New Yorkers Statewide Posted by Elizabeth Koke, October 23, 2015

under New York State’s antidiscrimination laws, alongside other categories including sexual orientation, race, religion and disability.

Governor Andrew Cuomo made a historic announcement Thursday evening of new regulations to protect all transgender New Yorkers from discrimination in basic needs, including housing, employment, public accommodations credit, and education. These new regulations require that the New York Human Rights Law’s definition of “sex” and “disability” discrimination now include gender identity, gender expression, and gender dysphoria. Up until now, select cities and counties in New York have local gender expression non-discrimination laws, but no uniform statewide protections have been in place. These ad-hoc protections have had predictably spotty results: A transgender New Yorker working at a job in Suffolk County, for example, was protected legally from workplace discrimination because of gender identity, but could be evicted on the same reasons from an apartment in Nassau County, where no such protections have existed. The announcement comes in the aftermath of the State’s inability to pass the Gender Expression Non-Discrimination Act (GENDA), which would add “gender identity or expression” to the existing Human Rights Law. Historically, GENDA has found support in the Democratic-led Assembly, passing for the eighth time this past June in a bipartisan 88-45 vote; however, it has languished in the Republicancontrolled Senate, which has not brought GENDA to the floor for a vote, essentially stalling the bill. The new regulations will also help make good on the Governor’s commitment to ending AIDS in New York. “The potential, long-term ripple effects of this groundbreaking regulatory shift are tremendous,” asserted King, who served as community co-chair of the NY State Ending the AIDS Epidemic Task Force convened by

the Governor in October 2014. The Task Force’s End the Epidemic Blueprint, which was publicly accepted by the Governor from King in April 2015, identifies transgender individuals as a key population in need of enhanced services, including quality trans-specific medical care. “These new protections will not only enable transgender individuals to live their lives openly and fully, but by ensuring basic needs are met, including access to healthcare, it also reflects another step toward making the Governor’s bold vision of ending AIDS as an epidemic in New York State by the year 2020 a reality,” said Charles King, Housing Works President and CEO. “If a transgender person in New York doesn’t have a home to sleep in each night, it is difficult to access healthcare in the first place much less adhere to treatment. Trans-identified individuals are 50 times more likely to contract HIV than someone who isn’t trans-identified—because of the pervasive discrimination that has persisted in New York while we lacked a unified statewide law banning those discriminatory practices. HIV/AIDS and homelessness have disproportionately impacted the transgender community. The civil rights protections being granted for this community are essential to reaching an end to these dual crises.”

NYCLU Applauds New Discrimination Protections for Transgender New Yorkers October 22, 2015 — Governor Andrew Cuomo announced tonight an executive action directing the State Division of Human Rights to issue regulations that would interpret existing protections against discrimination on the basis of sex and disability to cover gender identity, transgender status and gender dysphoria. Gov. Cuomo’s executive action comes after the Gender Expression Nondiscrimination Act (GENDA), which the New York Civil Liberties Union has long advocated for, failed in the legislature during the 2015 session. GENDA would explicitly clarify that gender identity and gender expression are protected characteristics

The following statement is attributable to NYCLU Executive Director Donna Lieberman. “With this executive action, Gov. Cuomo has made it clear that his administration is committed to protecting transgender and gender nonconforming people in New York State. The hundreds of thousands of transgender and gender nonconforming people in New York State deserve freedom from harassment, mistreatment and exclusion. For too long New Yorkers who are transgender have been fired from their jobs, denied housing and services, and mistreated in the workplace, in stores and in restaurants because their gender identity or expression did not have clear legal protection. The regulations that the governor is proposing are a major step forward toward ensuring fairness and freedom for all New Yorkers. The proposed regulations, as reported, will clarify that transgender and gender nonconforming people are protected by the Human Rights Law from discrimination, that they can seek recourse from the State Division of Human Rights when they are subject to discrimination and harassment, and that the division will use its enforcement powers to prevent future discrimination. These clear legal protections go a long way toward allowing transgender New Yorkers to enjoy dignity, respect and access to opportunity in New York. However, in order to ensure full equality there is more work to do. Gender identity and gender expression should be explicitly included as protected categories under New York State’s Human Rights Law, on equal footing with other protected classes including sexual orientation, race, religion and disability. By enacting GENDA, New York can establish itself as a leader in protecting and respecting the rights of all.” 17

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Prisoners, Queers, and the Power of Grace by Nadya Lawson After my brother was convicted of fraud, my mother and I tried to understand how he wound up in his situation. “I guess I was a bad mommy,” she said. In an attempt to reassure her (and, sibling rivalry ever-present, to remind her that I was the better child), I replied, “I turned out pretty okay.” She looked at me kind of sadly and answered, “Well, some people would say that having a child be gay is just as bad as having a child who’s a criminal. Maybe worse.”

who he is to the one aspect of his existence that stains him, sets him apart as “undesirable.” Even as LGBTQ people invoke “pride,” celebrate our identities, and gain ground as just regular people, we find ourselves surprised and wounded in situations that remind us of our leper status. A lesbian friend running for office discovered this as she made great connections with her neighbors only to have that connection break when gay marriage was raised, “Oh, you’re one of THEM.”

Reality check. I couldn’t even be mad as the truth of her words hit me -- people really did feel that way. “I guess you’re 0 for 2 then; sorry mom,” is what I laughingly said. But it hurt. I mentally went through the catalog of all the things I had done right in my life, all the things that not only made me a good person but a person who actually did good -- didn’t get pregnant, didn’t do drugs, graduated from college, was the youngest person to get this and that award, first AfricanAmerican to do this and that thing, worked for such and such non-profits, tried to speak truth to power, adopted a kid. I was GOOD, not perfect, but good. How could I be in the same category as someone who actively chose to do wrong? Yet it was so. Despite everything, in many places, I am still considered a leper. Just like my goodfor-nothing brother.

Shared leper status has not resulted in political or social affinity between LGBTQ types and the mass incarcerated. We’d have to admit to shared pain and shared shame. Much of the modern LGBTQ rights movement has emphasized the idea that we are normal -- not scary, not predatory, not self-serving hedonists. We’re moms and dads. We take care of our aging parents and support our families. We’re good neighbors and make great best friends. Desires, weaknesses, are firmly checked.

My brother, of course, is not good for nothing. He is a convicted felon who is also creative and sensitive and funny and gentle and loves his children and is a whiz in the kitchen. He, like me, struggles against the reduction of

Our quest for inclusion is an unending struggle to prove our cleanliness. The mark of our stain is in the very fact that we need to decide, repeatedly, when and how to “come clean” -to come out to family and friends, to negotiate how much we say to neighbors, co-workers, employers, caregivers, etc. We can be taken down by a single comment: “You’re my sister and I love you, but frankly your lifestyle repulses me,” was my brother’s devastating response to my offer to host one of his

a better framework for collective action and liberation is grace

six children during a summer break. I was contemptuous of how he raised his kids; he was afraid my sinful lesbian life would taint them. In competing to be more worthy or less unclean, we both lost. The fights for LGBTQ equality and against mass incarceration have, at their roots, the same goal -- respecting the dignity of every person. The struggles overlap in not only goal but bodies-- queer people are most vulnerable within the mass incarceration system. But this is not enough. I used to think that shared pain was a logical basis for collective action. I didn’t take into account the power of stigma and shame, and the human propensity to react to such by distancing ourselves from and making ourselves better than afflicted others: “At least I’m not _____ (fill in the blank).” As I move deeper into my faith, I understand that a better framework for collective action and liberation is grace. In Christian context, grace is understood as undeserved favor received from God through love. For me, the power of grace is in the profound recognition of our own wholeness, and therefore the wholeness of others. We understand that there is no greater than or less than. We are instead empowered to lift each other up in full kinship.

Nadya Lawson is the senior warden at St. Andrew's Episcopal Church in Albany. She recently began a two-year Lay Preacher Training program through the Episcopal Diocese of Central New York.

This article is one of a series provided by Advocates for Welcoming Congregations, a Capital Region group that encourages the welcoming of LGBT persons into the full life and leadership of communities of faith. The group also works to make visible for members of the LGBT community opportunities for practicing their faith traditions. 19

TR A NS* V IEW

TRANSFIGURATION: LET ME COUNT THE WAYS I COPE by

Many of us have witnessed a person--or a loved one’s-- response to grief in the form of laughter or joking. It’s a particularly uncomfortable response to witness when the situation is so sad and somber and the loss so great our heart can hardly bear it.

Many transgender people have been the repeated victims of the social and governmental discrimination and their blindness to the suffering of transgender people. It can, at times, take on an absurdity worthy of Joseph Heller’s Catch-22 or Robert Altman’s MASH, and for some, it evokes a sense of humor acerbic and cutting-- both satirical and wry-- that points out the insanity of how those services set in place to help often do not, and do harm instead. There has been at various times articles written about a connection between LGBT folks and superheroes. Our fascination with their outsider status and difference--in looks and ability-- an analogy for our own outsidership from a hostile society. The corollary being that we make many good contributions to society, but that still does not really gain us membership. We stay outside. Some of us like to be outside, some of us yearn to be part of society, and then, of course, being Trans* there’s the whole continuum in between. An affinity for Superheroes allows Trans* people to slip safely into an inner space where being different is seen as being OK--or even appreciated or worshiped--that is, among the other superheroes. Like the X-Men, it can be about the creation of a family of choice when our own families do not welcome us. November heralds the beginning of the holiday season in Western culture, a

Hostile humor never works, but affirming humor is life saving.

Developing a real world sense of humor and using it is a saving grace--a real way to exact revenge without the accompanying drama and hurt. 20

Moonhawk RiverStone

time where family becomes important, and being with and connecting with your family is a pressure, an obligation, a mixed blessing or a command appearance steeped in terror. Most transgender folks don’t come from the idealized family situations we see portrayed in the media. Instead they face the constant tension of having to go home, and being pressured to do so. Or of wanting to go home and knowing that to do so will not be fulfilling. It can turn out to be a cold war of invisibility and being constantly misgendered with wrong pronouns and name, being disparaged and given “those looks” at our comfortably

November heralds the

beginning of the holiday season in Western culture, a time where family becomes important, and being with and connecting with your family is a pressure, an obligation, a mixed blessing or a command appearance steeped in terror.

gendered clothing and style. There’s a new expression making the rounds with younger transgender people, calling their former name, “my dead name”. A lot of us spend time at the holiday table wishing we were Superheroes who could zap into invisibility those who insist on using our dead names and pronouns, and let them feel the isolation of being frozen out--of being THE outsiders. Revenge is a nice fantasy, but there are volumes of literature about revenge from ancient to modern times that teach revenge is ultimately an empty act, leaving the injured Trans* person, still, outside. What do we have for consolation? Well, there’s living in our heads with the Superheroes, either the ones we’ve created for ourselves or our favorite ones from

the media. There is, of course, the current proliferation of video games where one can create their own avatar to represent them in the game, sallying forth to win the day as our authentic self, even if an avatar of our authentic self. From a Trans* perspective this ability to create oneself online in a game as one would ideally like to be can be transformative (pun intended) and healing, a rehearsal space for coping with the disparities of an unwelcoming society. Trans* folks can gain efficacy and power--and community--from such imaginary creations. They can create situations where the world is not so xenophobic, but harmonious and embracing of difference with love and enthusiasm, even if we’re fighting in some unknown universe in a galaxy far far away. And then there’s Second Life’s virtual world of about a million plus users, many, many of them transgender members. There has been a lot written about Second Life, it’s positives and negatives. Created in 2003, early on Second Life became a flash point of possibility for some segments of the Trans* community. The point here is that for many Trans* people this has been a Life Saver of a place for them to explore safely who they are and to create themselves, their lives and environments that are supportive. Trans* Second Life avatars create a universe that parallels ordinary non Second Life lives but without the violence and discrimination and misgendering. Ultimately we need to learn to live in the real world of discrimination and loss and violence where random bad things happen to innocent people with far too much frequency. I see humor as a companion to the grief and loss process of how we handle the daily onslaught of misgendering and disparaging “evil” looks people give us, how we handle those all too infrequent intrusive questions. Hostile humor never works, but affirming humor is life saving. Developing a real world sense of humor and using it is a saving grace--a real way to exact revenge without the accompanying drama and hurt. So many of my most wounded clients have a keenly developed sense of humor that binds their pain and heals it. Their humor allows them to go out into the world again and

A lot of us spend time at the holiday table wishing we were

Superheroes who could zap into invisibility those who insist on using our dead names

and pronouns, and let them feel the isolation of being frozen out--

of being

THE outsiders.

again and finding their way with a smile and a joke, pushing the understanding of Trans* forward one laugh at a time. Thus creating their own Superhero myth with each humorous interaction, no longer outside, but inside their own pride and joy. When you find yourself at the family table this holiday season muttering to your inner Superheroes, yearning for another hour at the video game or on Second Life, remember, you don’t need to be the punch line of someone else’s verbal violence, but they can be the punch life of your gentle educative joke. Turning it around, being dead named and misgendered can be fun--at their expense, not yours. All you need to do is spend a little time with the Superheroes polishing your attitude! Be thankful for all the ways we cope, they’re what make us our own heroes--to ourselves where it counts. Until next time...T * Second Life is a free 3D virtual world where users can socialize, connect and create using free voice and text chat.

TRANS VIEW© #138

Rev. Moonhawk River

Stone of Riverstone Consulting is an Interfaith Minister, transgender activist, writer, educator, consultant, keynote speaker and psychotherapist in private practice for over 25 years with experience and extensive expertise in all aspects of transgender policy and health.

Trans Pride Trans Pride

The Trans Pride program is dedicated to empowering trans* and gender non-conforming people and their allies through social opportunities, community building, resource sharing, and advocacy.

The Trans Pride program is dedicated to empowering trans* and gender Discussion Group & Greet non-conforming people and Meet their allies A discussion group An informal social evening through social opportunities, community focusing on issues for trans* people to building, resource sharing, and advocacy. important to trans* people and community. 1st Tuesdays, 7-9PM

connect and build community. 3rd Tuesdays, 7-9PM

The Discussion Group and Meet & Greet are open to all trans* people and those questioning their gender, ages 18+. Trans* denotes a wide range of people including those who identify as transgender, transsexual, two-spirit, genderqueer, gender-non-conforming, questioning their gender, and more. We use the asterisk to help us remember that trans* identities and experiences are diverse, while still sharing a common thread. All meetings take place at the Pride Center, 332 Hudson Avenue, Albany

P: 518.462.6138 PROGRAMS@CAPITALPRIDECENTER.ORG www.capitalpridecenter.org

Discussion Group - A discussion group focusing on issues important to trans* people and community. 1st Tuesdays, 7-9PM Meet & Greet - An informal social evening for trans* people to connect and build community. 3rd Tuesdays, 7-9PM

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LAW OFFICE OF GERI POMERANTZ, ESQ. Proudly serving the LGBT community and our friends

Thomas J. Walling, CFP®

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ASK MARK Y O U R TA X Q U ESTI O N S

Welcome to the DEAR MARK column where you can ask a tax question. Of course some questions cannot be answered to due to the limited space in this column or warrant more facts due to specific circumstances of the taxpayer. Answers that apply to specific taxpayers may not necessary apply to others. Changes in tax law and rules may affect answers given at any point. You can write Mark at Mark Witecki CPA CFP(R) CFE, 3701 State St, Schenectady, NY 12304

============================

Dear Mark, I am a musician and purchased an expensive guitar. I have a day job but my music business is growing very fast and I wanted to get something professional. I started my music business in 2014 early in the year (March) and I grossed only about three thousand dollars in 2014. I showed a loss on my tax schedule for the business. So far in 2015 I have grossed about fourteen thousand dollars but I have over four thousand dollars of expenses not including the guitar which is over seven thousand dollars. Can I write the whole guitar off in one year? Truly, Jeff

Mark,

Dear Mark W,

I bought a bookcase for my professional office. I am a social worker and I am self employed. Most of the books in the bookcase are business related but there are a couple of books that are personal on the bookcase. How do I treat the purchase of the bookcase?

I am going to have a holiday party and invite all my clients to the party and I also want to invite some potential clients. Can I write that off as a deduction on my taxes?

Confused but not entirely.

Dear Wondering,

Dear Confused,

You need to keep a detailed guest list and document the business purposes of the party and why the invitees are important to your business and be as specific as possible. Keep all receipts and after the party, document any resulting business as a result of the party.

Since almost all of the books in the bookcase are for business use and the primary use of the bookcase is for business, you could justify writing off the entire bookcase using the "de minimus exception rule". You can use Section 179 depreciation to write off the entire amount in one year. ============================

Dear Mark, I have a construction business and I bought a new truck. I also bought a metal sign for the driver side of my pickup that has my business name on it and I put it on my door. Does this mean I can deduct the whole dang truck? Write-off Now

Dear Jeff, Based upon the facts you stated above , it appears that you can write off the whole guitar in one year using Section 179 depreciation but you may not want to write off the entire amount if you think you will be in higher tax brackets in future years. I would advise a consultation to explore that situation.

Dear Write-off Now, That only means you can write off the cost of the metal sign. Proving vehicle expenses means keeping a mileage log of business and personal miles and keeping track of all expenses including gas, repairs, insurance, plates, etc. You have a choice of using a mileage rate or actual expenses with some limitations.

Sign me, Wondering

Answers that apply to specific taxpayers may not necessary apply to others. Changes in tax law and rules may affect answers given at any point. You can write Mark at Mark Witecki CPA CFP(R) CFE, 3701 State St, Schenectady, NY 12304. Mark D. Witecki specializes in small businesses and professional individuals. Mr. Witecki has a B. S. in Accounting from S. U. N. Y. Albany and an M. S. in Accounting from Syracuse University. Mark D. Witecki is a Certified Public Accountant, CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER ™ practitioner, Certified Fraud Examiner, Certified College Planning Specialist and is admitted to practice before the United States Tax Court. Certified Financial Planner Board of Standards Inc. owns the certification marks CFP® , CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER™ and federally registered CFP (with flame design) in the U.S., which it awards to individuals who successfully complete CFP Board’s initial and ongoing certification requirements. Mark’s office is located at 3701 State Street, Schenectady, New York

============================= ============================= =============================

Mark D. Witecki Certified Public Accountant Certified Financial Planner™ Certified Fraud Examiner Tax Preparation 3701 State Street, Schenectady, NY 12304 (518) 346-4000 f: (518) 346-5195

Certified Financial Planner Board of Standards, Inc. owns the Certified Marks CFP (c). Certified Financial Planner ™ and federally registered CFP (with flame design) in the U.S. which it awards to individuals who successfully complete CFP’s initial and ongoing certification requirements

Pride Center Holiday Networking & Comedy Event Thursday December 3rd 7 pm Networking / 8 pm Show Begins

Featuring

Jaye McBride and Shawn Gille Comedy Works 500 Northern Blvd Albany NY 12204 $20, tickets must be purchased in advance at www.capitalpridecenter,org

Members

out

the

garden

COMPANIONS IN THE GARDEN by

I spend a lot of time in the garden by myself. I don’t, however, feel alone. Sometimes Sara is working in her vegetable garden while I am working in the perennial garden, and we enjoy the companionship of parallel play. Our cat, Oscar, used to join me on occasion for a roll in the catmint, or just to watch in case I stirred up a rodent. But Oscar’s gone now and so this fall I depend even more on the companionship of plants. I like to think that my plants know when they are being cared for and appreciated. And like so many of my gardening friends, I talk to my plants while I work, praising their beauty and endurance, and thanking them for sharing themselves with me. To those who don’t do horticulture, such behavior no doubt seems silly at best. As we learn more and more about how plants communicate with other plants, alerting each other, for example, to the presence of pests, I believe we will also learn of communicative connections between plants and people. For now, I just consider them friends. Then there are the rabbits and the birds and the toads, ah yes the toads, those real toads in real gardens eating all the bad bugs, and the folks who visit and the neighbors who pass by. By myself, then, but not alone. Still, I take great pleasure in human company when working in the garden even though I am a fanatic about who I let touch my dirt or tend my plants. My garden is sacred space and those who work in it must be in alignment with its special energy. This may sound like more silliness but I can tell you that

Judith Fetterley

By myself, then,

but not alone.

once a woman answered my call for help and before she reached the front door I could tell the energy was wrong. I hurriedly manufactured some excuse about having a crisis I needed to attend to, thanked and paid her for her time, and said farewell. And once a person came who disrespected the rhythms of our work, wanting to slow down where we needed to go fast and speed up where we needed to go slow. But, amazingly enough, these are exceptions. For the past 15 years, I have been blessed with extraordinary help creating and maintaining my garden. Louise and I built the stone wall together; Nancy and I planted the crabapple tree that now occupies all of what used to be the vegetable garden; Susan D helped me put in the long border and Ben helped me put in the low maintenance garden; Ouliana planted and transplanted and weeded and watered and left a piece of her soul in the ground. And for the past 10 years there has been Brenda. Brenda is a horticulturalist, she loves plants like I do and better yet knows them and knows their needs. I am always asking her for information – what do you find really works in dry shade? Brenda has a great eye for design; this spring she took one look at the by then way-too-large dwarf Alberta spruce

LOCAL EVENTS THINGS TO DO CONTESTS Neighbors vow to battle plan seeking gas station with drive-through. B1

that was blocking the approach to the front door and went and got her shovel. I respect her opinion when I ask, how do you think a dwarf lilac would look here or where can I put an Amelanchier shrub? Brenda notices things and calls me to check out the fungus on the Sawara cypress or the pattern on a day lily bloom. Brenda likes to work and I like to work. Brenda is dependable and Brenda is strong, a lot stronger than me and can do for my garden what I can’t do. By now Brenda knows my garden almost as well as I do, and I can trust her to take care of it as well as I could. Do you have any idea what that means? We talk while we work about anything and everything. Or we stay quiet. Sometimes we work side by side but often we are in different parts of the garden doing different things. It doesn’t matter, we are comfortable and easy together, like a team of horses who have learned to adjust each other’s load. I feel companioned in her presence and good after a day of working together. Thanks.

Judith Fetterley lives and gardens in Glenmont, New York. She also runs Perennial Wisdom, a garden design business for new and existing gardens. Reach Judith at f etterleyj@gmail.com

Every WEDNESDAY

“TRIVIA NIGHT” 7PM

Fun & Prizes!! Every THURSDAY

“50¢ WING NIGHT” Beer Specials

Guide to the Capital Region DINING NIGHTLIFE DIRECTORY & MORE!

Check out our new “Express Lunch” - Only $599 Call 372-6024 for details

441 State Street, Schenectady, NY (518) 372-6024

THE FASHIONABLE AND THE FRIVOLOUS by ALAN BENNET ILAGAN

THE F-WORD

Show Your Pride Online

I t ’s b e e n hurled at me since I was a boy. A word and term meant to evoke a certain flair, a certain style, a certain way of life. It was code for something else too, even if I was too young to understand. The word was ‘flamboyant’ and to this day people use it when describing me. It’s also another word for ‘gay’ even if it’s something I didn’t get until many years later. For those in upstate New York, ‘flamboyant’ could mean anything from sequins and feather boas to one notch above your average crocs and cargo shorts combo. That’s a wide berth, one that is easily surpassed with just a modicum of decent taste and simple tailoring. I never minded the moniker, because it meant I was doing something right, something that set me apart from the herds of drab cattle that passed for fashionable in these parts. It was a nicer and more polite way of saying that I was different, which was a nicer and more polite way of saying one was gay. Such codes were at play long before I arrived on the scene, and they were used by people at every stage of the sexual spectrum. They were a way of marking others – enemies or would-be-lovers, interested parties or plain-clothes police officers. The words were descriptive and a form of designation. Like most labels, they served a purpose that brought freedom and limitation at once. And like most terms that others used to describe me, they were accurate only to a certain point. Today, I hear the ‘flamboyant’ descriptor

mostly from other gay men, and it can carry a certain implicit snideness, particularly when coming from someone less than confident in their own identity. I hear a note of ridicule when someone who prides himself on appearing especially masculine calls me out for looking a little too flamboyant for his taste. It’s subtle, but it’s there. A note that indicates the name-caller has a problem with a guy acting too feminine, or too gay. Luckily for me, I’ve never considered my ‘flamboyance’ any sort of indicator of who I am as a person. If it makes other people more comfortable to categorize me as such, that’s ok. They’ve already shown their hand when they went for such a dig in the first place. I’ll take my flamboyance, flaunt it, and flounce away in the finest f-off form you’ll ever find.

Alan Bennett Ilagan is a freelance writer and amateur photographer who resides in upstate New York with his husband Andy. He created the website www.ALANILAGAN. com, which contains a repository of his work, as well as a daily blog; the website recently celebrated its tenth anniversary online. He was the manager of the Romaine Brooks Gallery from 2008 to 2012. His writing has appeared in Instinct, xy magazine, Capitalmen, Q Northeast, the Windy City Times, and the Boston Phoenix. Notable artistic collaborations have been created with the likes of Steven Underhill, Paul Richmond, Dennis Dean, and Michael Breyette.

Welcoming Congregations

Join Us In Exploring Your Spiritual Side At One Of The Welcoming Congregations Below: Community Congregational Church (UCC) 221 Columbia Tpke, Rensselaer www.clintonheightsucc.org

First Church in Albany 110 North Pearl Street, Albany www.firstchurchinalbany.org (518)463-4449

Community Reformed Church of Colonie 701 Sand Creek Road, Colonie www.coloniereformed.org (518)869-5589

First Congregational Church of Albany UCC & NACCC 405 Quail Street, Albany www.firstcongregationalalbany.org (518)482-4580

Congregation Agudat Achim (Conservative) 2117 Union Street, Schenectady www.agudatachim.org (518) 393-9211

First Lutheran Church 181 Western Avenue, Albany www.FirstLutheranAlbany.org (518)463-1326

Congregation B’nai Shalom (Reform) 420 Whitehall Road, Albany www.bnaishalom.albany.ny.us (518) 482-5283

First Presbyterian Church 362 State Street, Albany www.firstpresalbany.org (518)449-7332

Congregation Berith Sholom (Reform) 167 Third Street, Troy www.berithsholom.org (518)272-8872

First Reformed Church 8 North Church Street, Schenectady www.1streformed.com

Congregation Beth Emeth (Reform) 100 Academy Road, Albany www.bethemethalbany.org (518)436-9761

First Unitarian Society of Schenectady 1221 Wendell Avenue, Schenectady www.fussonline.org (518)374-4446

Congregation Gates of Heaven (Reform) 842 Ashmore Avenue, Schenectady www.cgoh.org (518)374-8173 Congregation Ohav Shalom (Conservative) 113 New Krumkill Road, Albany www.ohavshalom.org Congregation Temple Sinai (Reform) 509 Broadway, Saratoga Springs www.templesinai-saratogasprings.org (518) 584-8730 Delmar Presbyterian Church 585 Delaware Ave, Delmar www.delmarpres.org Eastern Parkway United Methodist Church 943 Palmer Avenue, Schenectady www.easternparkway.weebly.com (518)374-4306 St. George’s Episcopal Church 30 North Ferry St., Schenectady www.stgeorgesschenectady.org Emmanuel Baptist Church 275 State Street, Albany, NY www.emmanuelalbany.net (518)465-5161

First Unitarian Universalist Society of Albany 405 Washington Avenue, Albany www.albanyuu.org (518)463-7135 First United Methodist Church 603 State Street, Schenectady, www.gbgm-umc.org/schenectady (518)374-4403 First United Methodist Church, East Greenbush www.fumceg.org First United Presbyterian Church 1915 Fifth Avenue, Troy www.unitedprestroy.org (518)272-2771 Friends Meeting (Quaker) 727 Madison Avenue, Albany (518) 436-8812 Presbyterian New England Congregational Church, Saratoga http://pnecchurch.org/ Good Shepherd Lutheran Church 501 Albany Shaker Road, Loudonville www.goodshepherdchurchloudonville.org (518)458-1562

Holy Trinity National Catholic Church 405 Washington Avenue, Albany www.NCCofA.org/holytrin.html (518)434-8861 Journey United Church of Christ 500 Kenwood Blvd, Delmar www.journeyucc.com Saratoga Springs United Methodist Church 175 Fifth Avenue, Saratoga Springs www.saratogaspringsumc.org (518)5843720 Saint Aelred’s Priory and Retreat House (National Catholic) 670 Bunker Hill Road, Northville staelredpriory@aol.com (518) 863-8086 / (518) 434-8861 St. Andrews Episcopal Church Main at Madison Avenue, Albany www.standrewsalbany.org (518)489-4747 St. John’s Lutheran Church 160 Central Avenue, Albany www.stjohnsalbany.org (518)465-7545 Temple Israel 600 New Scotland Avenue, Albany www.tialbany.org (518) 438-7858 Unitarian Universalist Congregation of Saratoga 624 North Broadway, Saratoga Springs www.saratoga-uu.org (518)584-1555 Unity Church in Albany 21 King Avenue, Albany www.unitychurchinalbany.org (518)4533603 Woodstock Jewish Congregation (Reconstructionist) 1682 Glasco Turnpike, Woodstock www.wjcshul.org (845)246-1671

Proud To Be Open! Affirming! Welcoming! Joyous!

Advertisers Index Albany Civic Theater pg. 31 Albany Gay Men's Chorus pg. 35 Albany.com pg. 27 Alliance for Positive Health / Beaujolais Nouveau pg. 2 Buenau's Opticians pg. 34 Canterbury Animal Hospital pg. 18 Choices Counseling & Consulting pg. 18 Corey Jamison Consulting pg. 24 Drue Sanders Custom Jewelers pg. 16 First United Presbyterian Church pg. 11 HomoRadio pg. 24 In Our Own Voices pg. 8 Interim Healthcare pg. 14 Jay Zhang Photography pg. 11 Jaye McBride pg. 24 Joseph Roche, Accountant pg. 29 Law Office of Geri Pomerantz pg. 24 Mark Witecki, CPA, CFP pg. 25 Nico's Rooftop Tavern pg. 27 Northeast Acura pg. 16 Presbyterian Rainbow pg. 32 Queer Engineer pg. 32 Realty USA- The Capital Team pg. 14 Riverstone Consulting pg. 11 Ronnie Mangione, Financial Advisor pg. 18 Saratoga Pride pg. 32 Security Supply / Bath Expressions Showroom pg. 11 Skylands Services pg. 18 Spectrum 8 Theatre pg. 16 Thomas J. Walling, CFP / Cetera Advisor Networks pg. 24 Tri City Rentals pg. 40 Troy Music Hall pg. 3 Warner & Warner Attorneys at Law pg. 14 Welcoming Congregations pg. 29 Wells Fargo pg. 14 Women's Social Network Gatherings pg. 9

DOCUMENTARY REVIEW

“Two Spirits interweaves the tragic story of a mother’s loss of her son with a revealing look at a time when the world wasn’t simply divided into male and female, and many Native American cultures held places of honor for people of integrated genders.”

“Fred Martinez was nádleehí, a malebodied person with a feminine nature, a special gift according to his ancient Navajo culture. But the place where two discriminations meet is a dangerous place to live, and Fred became one of the youngest hate-crime victims in modern history when he was brutally murdered at sixteen. Between tradition and controversy, sex and spirit, and freedom and fear, lives the truth—the bravest choice you can make is to be yourself.” My Thoughts – We are coming to a point in advocacy and activism where people are truly trying to indulge in their identities to truly get an idea of

by Deidre Dumpson who they are in the world. With that, there is a large call to action from the education system, wondering where our people are in the history books. Time and time again marginalized people have found themselves searching for some sort of historical understanding of their identities, to eliminate the idea that they are alone in their struggle. That very lack of representation in history education has led to things like violence, invisibility, silence and so much more.

Utilize this film to not only educate yourself, but to also to provide a platform for those who can relate to this film to share their narratives! MUST WATCH! Where Can I Find This?! – Buy the DVD from twospirits.org! $17.99+$2.07 Shipping Digital Download on iTunes! $9.99 Or search your local libraries!

This film changes that. This documentary gives voice to not only two spirited folks of today, but yesterday as well. Through this documentary the viewer is able to catch a glimpse of what it means to be two spirit, the history of two spirit people and the lives and experiences of two spirit people today. It is empowering, in that it speaks to the value of two spirit people in indigenous tribes, which completely opposes the lack of value today.

Albany Civic Theater Presents Looking For Normal by Jane Anderson Directed by Brian Sheldon

Preview: Thursday, November 5, 2015 Show dates: November 6 through November 22, 2015 Fridays, Saturdays at 7:30pm, Sundays at 3pm Tickets: $18 Student and group discounts available. Albany Civic Theater is located at 235 Second Avenue. 462-1297 for reservations. “…the kind of play that makes you want to see everything else its author, Jane Anderson, writes.” – Laura Hitchcock, CurtainUp

Like us on Facebook.

www.albanycivictheater.org 31

These Presbyterian Churches Welcome You Where you can find a place ~ come as you are!

Albany First Presbyterian State & Willett Streets www.firstpresalbany.org Sunday Worship 8:30 am & 10:45 am

Hudson First Presbyterian Church 369 Warren Street FirstPresHudson.org Sunday Worship 10:45 am

Spencertown St. Peterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Presbyterian Church 5219 County Route 7 SaintPetersPC.org Sunday Worship 10:00 am

Albany Westminster Presbyterian 262 State Street www.WPCalbany.org Sunday Worship 10:00 am

Hudson Falls First Presbyterian Church 5 River Street www.fpchudsonfalls.org Sunday Worship 10:00 am

Stephentown Stephentown Federated Church 1513 Garfield Road StephentownFederatedChurch.org Sunday Worship 9:30 am

Amsterdam United Presbyterian Church 25 Church Street www.upchurch25.org Sunday Worship 9:30 am

Putnam Station Putnam United Presbyterian Church 365 County Route 2 518-547-8378 Sunday Worship 10:00 am

Stillwater Stillwater United Church 747 Hudson Avenue StillwaterUnitedChurch.org Sunday Worship 9:00 & 10:30 am

Colonie Roessleville Presbyterian Church Elmhurst and Central Avenue 518-459-2816 Sunday Worship 9:30 am

Rensselaer First Presbyterian Church 34 Broadway 518-463-0894 Sunday Worship 10:00 am

Troy (Lansingburgh) Cornerstone Community Church 570 3rd Avenue www.cornerstoneccl.org Sunday Worship 10:00 am

Delmar Delmar Presbyterian Church 585 Delaware Avenue www.delmarpres.org Sunday Worship 10:00 am

Rensselaerville Rensselaerville Presbyterian Church 1454 CR 351 rvillepres.org Sunday Worship 11:00 am (Summer Only)

Troy First United 1915 Fifth Avenue (downtown) www.UnitedPresTroy.org Sunday Worship 10:00 am

Glens Falls First Presbyterian Church 400 Glen Street

Saratoga Springs Presbyterian-New England Congregational 24 Circular Street www.pnecchurch.org Sunday Worship 10:45 am

Valatie First Presbyterian Church 3212 Church Street 518-758-9658 Sunday Worship 11:00 am

FPCgf.org

Sunday Worship 10:00 am Guilderland Hamilton Union Presbyterian Church 2291 Western Avenue

Scotia-Glenville Trinity Presbyterian Church 185 Swaggertown Rd. HamiltonUnionPresbyterianChurch.org www.ScotiaTrinity.org Sunday Worship 8:30 am & 10:00 am Sunday Worship 10:00 am

West Charlton West Charlton United Presbyterian 1331 Sacandaga Road www.westcharltonUPC.org Sunday Worship 10:30 am

QueerEngineer

age ad for December 2015 CommUnity

Get to know us & how you can support LGBTQ* students in science, technology, engineering, & mathematics. /QueerEngineer

For any questions regarding this ad, please contact Judy Moyer (518) 283-7663 or Moyer.Judith@gmail.com. Presbyterian Rainbow contract for 2015

@QueerEngineer

We are all Godâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s children ~ Come as you are!

A Pride Center of the Capital Region affiliate

FITS LIKE A GLOVE EDITORS NOTE: *Though the article and interview describe the main character as a transgender man and use he/him pronouns, the play is about a transgender woman and her experience. **”Transitioning” is the proper term for trans people who are making social, legal, cultural, physical, and/or medical changes. ***”Transgendering” is not a word used by trans people and is considered offensive by most. Albany Civic Theatre is producing the classic play on a man’s transgender experience* “Looking For Normal” by Jane Anderson this month. It tells the story of Roy and Irma, a solid, respectable churchgoing Midwestern couple who go to their pastor for counselling and Roy confesses that he’s a woman trapped in a man’s body. His truth has ramifications beyond the couple as all their friends and family grapple with what they believe and perceive to be normal. I sat down with Brian Sheldon, the director and Rich Angehr, who plays Roy, to talk about their production and whether this is a risky move for a community theatre. So, how did you come across this play? Why did you choose it? Brian: I came across this play probably 10 years ago. Adam Coons and I used to take bus trips to the city and do two show days. We’d go to the bookstore, either Theater Circle or Drama Book and we’d always have a play in mind we were going to get and for another we would just close our eyes and reach out, and I picked this play. So I read the play. I know people that have transgendered**. I’ve fought for equality. I’ve written to senators and congressmen and designed a protest against the hateful Westboro Baptist Church. The LGBTQ community is near and dear to my heart. My father is a homosexual man and its been my life’s blood. Rich: This play kind of found me too. I hadn’t auditioned for it. It was on

my radar when I had seen the auditions posted but I really questioned whether there was any part in it for me and then a mutual friend contacted Brian and I wound up reading for it and the more I found out about the theme, the more interested I was. It’s a challenge but the whole theme of what’s normal and the theme of diversity…I’m a social worker and I work with mentally ill people so normalcy is often a question but they’re the most normal people I know. I come from a very diverse family-gay, straight, black, white and when we get together we don’t see any of those labels. We just see love. To me, that’s what this play is. It’s a love story. What have you discovered about the play? Is it more challenging than you thought or are you surprised it just “fits like a glove”? Brian: I think it’s definitely fitting like a glove. I think we’re a little more advanced on this subject in the Northeast than where the play talks place in the cornbelt. I truly believe the subject of the play fits the tri-city area. Things we see on a day-to-day basis, topics that we fight for on a day-today basis. It fits like a glove. Rich: As we go through rehearsals, it becomes more and more clear that Roy is the most normal guy in the play. He’s going through a tremendous change physically but from the beginning of the play he’s the character who knows who he is whereas everybody else is trying to figure out who he is and who they are and I really see Irma as the hero of this story, she’s the one who has to deal with the most and change the most.

change in myself and my audience. That’s my philosophy on theater. I believe that this play for these actors is doing that as well. I said at the very first read through, “This play will change you somehow.” And it is. You can talk to any of the actors and I’m pretty sure it’s doing that. Not because of me. Not because of the direction. It’s because of the play. This play is changing them and it’s getting a damn good performance from them. What do you hope the audience takes away from this play? Brian: I hope people would see it and find a new level of acceptance. There are still people who have no idea what this is, transgendering***, or they don’t know it on a personal level. This play can definitely show you a personal level to it. This play can familiarize you with it and put a human face on it. You’re going to walk away from this play learning something new about this community. Rich: I think it just has tremendous potential to open people up in terms of their thinking and their hearts and in terms of the way we label one another. That what really dissolves the labels is love.

“Looking For Normal” www.albanycivictheater.org 11/6-11/22, pay-what-you-will preview 11/5

So it’s a journey of discovery for everyone? Brian: Every single character has a specific journey. The fact that Roy is going thru his specific change flips it on the ear for them and they look at themselves and what is normal. Their dealing with menopause and puberty which two characters are dealing with. Moreover I do theater to evoke

Patrick White is a Capital Region actor, director and teacher performing in “The Night Alive” thru 11/7 and “Charley’s Aunt” 11/20-12/19. He offers Saturday morning acting classes for all levels. white.patrick1963@gmail.com 33

MICHAEL COOKS AND YOU CAN TOO by MICHAEL MEADE

CLASSIC PUMPKIN PIE Here is a delicious recipe for pumpkin pie to make for your celebration this year. Happy Thanksgiving! Classic Pumpkin Pie 1 3/4 cups unsweetened pumpkin puree (one 15-ounce can) 3/4 cup firmly-packed light brown sugar 2 teaspoon ginger 1 & 1/2 teaspoon cinnamon 1/2 teaspoon salt 2/3 cup milk 2/3 cup heavy cream 3 large eggs 1 teaspoon vanilla extract 1 unbaked pie shell, homemade or frozen. In a small heavy saucepan, stir the pumpkin, brown sugar, spices, and salt together till mixed. Over medium heat, bring the mixture to a simmer, stirring constantly. Reduce the heat to low and cook, stirring constantly, for 3 to 5 minutes or until thick and shiny. Scrape the mixture into a mixer or food processor and beat for 1 minute. With the motor on, add the milk and cream, mixing until incorporated completely. Scrape the sides of the bowl and add the eggs one at a time, mixing just to incorporate, about 5 seconds after each egg. Add the vanilla. Pour the mixture into the unbaked pie shell, place in the oven and bake for 50 to 60 minutes at 375 F. It is done when a knife inserted between the sides and center comes out almost clean. The filling will have puffed and the surface may appear dull, except for the center. After 15 to 20 minutes, protect the edges with a foil ring. When pie is done, place on a rack to cool. When cool, the surface will be flat.

Michael Meade graduated from the Culinary Institute of America in Hyde Park,

New York, worked at Jackâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Oyster House in Albany and is currently souschef at Thunder Mountain Curry in Troy. Questions & comments are welcome at Michaelmeade1215@yahoo.com 34

Affiliate Events HOME FOR THE HOLIDAYS CONCERT The Albany Gay Men’s Chorus presents their holiday concert on Sunday, December 13th at 4pm at the First Congregational Church (405 Quail Street - off New Scotland Ave- Albany, NY) Tickets are $12/Adults $9/Students Under 12/ Free. Tickets available at www.capitalpridecenter.org, Romeo's Gifts (299 LArk St, Albany) and Oh Bar (204 Lark St., Albany.)

MOVIE NIGHT - SECOND TUESDAY OF EACH MONTH We will begin at 5PM at Harvey’s Pub, 14 Phila Street Saratoga Springs,. From there, we can decide who wants to see what movies and leave accordingly for Bowtie Cinemas.

LESBIAN NETWORKING BREAKFAST We meet on the third Thursday of each month, at the Country Corner Café on Church Street in the upstairs dining room at 7:30 am. Latecomers are welcome.

MONTHLY GLBTQ SUPPORT GROUP Second Sunday of the Month Fallstaff Building, Skidmore College 3-4:30pm. Contact Caroline with questions: 518.857.9361

SUNDAYS

Every Sun.

LGBTQ Alcoholics Anonymous† ** in the Garden Level 7-8:30pm

of the month

2nd

EVENTS

Saratoga Springs Library 49 Henry St, Saratoga Springs More info: Caroline Russell Smith 518.857.9361

Sun.

3-4:30-pm

Sponsored by Saratoga Pride and The Pride Center of the Capital Region

of themonth

Game Night in the Rainbow Cafe

6-9pm

Vintage Pride Potluck Lunch

Last

1-3pm

5-9pm

Tues.

Trans* Pride Discussion Group on the 1st Floor 7-9pm

of themonth

T-Talk: Trans* & Gender Non-Confroming Youth Group (ages 18 & under)

on the 1st Floor

6-8

(ages 18 & under) Saratoga Springs Library, Susman Room 49 Henry St, Saratoga Springs

(ages 18 & under)

Proctor’s Theater, Underground Space 432 State St., Schenectady

Trans* Pride Meet & Greet on the 1st Floor

LGBTQ Narcotics Anonymous† ** in the Garden Level 7:30-8:30pm

FRIDAYS

7-9pm

(ages 18 & under)

Tues.

on the 1st Floor †

Every Friday

of the month

Appointments also available by calling (518) 462-6138 10-8:30pm walk in

AYO! Youth Drop in Space

(ages 18 & under) on 1st Floor & in the Garden Level

in the Garden Level

7-8:30pm

6-8pm

check out the artists at www.capitalpridecenter.org/RBG

on the 1st Floor

5-9pm

Except where noted all events take place at

The Pride Center 332 Hudson Ave Albany, NY 12210 The Garden Level is wheelchair accessible. Enter from the street through the door beneath the front steps.

Anonymous meetings held at the Pride Center are non-affiliated, independent groups **indicates

3-9pm

Garden Level only on 1st Fridays

Special Artist Reception and Opening in the Romaine Brooks Gallery

T-Talk: Trans* & Gender Non-Confroming Youth Group

of themonth

6-7:30pm

(ages 18 & under)

4:30-6

of themonth

Schenectady LGBTQA Youth Group

Albany LGBTQA Youth Group

Saratoga LGBTQA Youth Group

Tues.

6-7pm social hour 7-8pm discussion

Drop-in Rapid HIV Testing

Capital Region Support Group for Family & Friends of LGBTQ People**

Women’s Group on the 1st Floor

7pm

THURSDAYS

Saratoga LGBTQA Youth Group

First Unitarian Society of Schenectady 1221 Wendel Ave, Schenectady More info: Deborah Kenyon deborahkenyon2@gmail.com, 518-584-4774 (C), 518-695-4117 (H) Tues. 7pm

4th

Weds.

(ages 18 & under) Saratoga Springs Library, Susman Room 49 Henry St, Saratoga Springs 4:30-6pm

6-7pm social hour 7-8pm discussion

Live from the Livingroom Poetry Open Mic** in the Garden Level

Weds.

of themonth

4:30-6pm

TUESDAYS st

2 th 4

Thurs.of themonth

Men’s Group , 3 & 5th Mondays - Discussion 2nd & 4th Mondays - Social in the Garden Level 7-8:30pm

Women’s Group on the 1st Floor

Every

Mon..of themonth

MONDAYS st

Vintage Pride Sober Happy Hour on the 1st Floor

of themonth

Supper Sunday on the 1st Floor

Sun. themonth

1st

WEDNESDAYS

Weds.

First Presbyterian Church 362 State St., Albany

Sun.

of themonth

WEEKLY

LGBTQ Support Group

an outside group that meets at the Pride Center

Friday, November 20

Special Events

Transgender Day of Remembrance: Youth Speak Out & Vigil Come out to the Pride Center (332 Hudson Avenue, Albany) and join LGBTQA youth and their allies as we remember and celebrate the lives of trans* and gender non-conforming people that we have lost this past year. There will be a vigil, followed by a youth speak out/ open mic. All are welcome to attend. Priority is given to youth community members to speak/share. THIS IS A SAFE SPACE. SUBSTANCE & ALCOHOL FREE EVENT. Light refreshments will be served. ACCESSIBILITY INFORMATION: The event will be held on the First (Main floor) of the Pride Center. There is a set of 7 steps into the building with hand rails on both sides.There is no wheelchair lift on this level. If you require assistance, please connect with a staff member prior to the event at 4626138. EVENT TRIGGER WARNING: Mentions of violence against trans and gender nonconforming people, suicide, and self-harm. Support will be available. Learn more at www.capitalpridecenter.org Friday, November 20 The Pride Center 332 Hudson Ave, Albany, 12210 6 -9 pm Free!

December Thursday December 3 Holiday Networking @ Comedy Works Featuring Jaye McBride & Shawn Gille Thursday, December 5 Doors at 7PM / Show at 8PM Comedy Works 500 Northern Blvd., Albany 12204 $20

Purchase tickets at www.capitalpridecenter.org

Janurary Saturday, January 9 LGBTQ Hockey Night at the Times Union Arena Come out to the Albany Devils game on Saturday, Jan. 9 vs. the Lehigh Valley Phantoms at 5:00 pm. Stay after the Albany Devils game to cheer on the Albany Gay Hockey Association’s Albany Bombers vs. Boston Pride Hockey’s Boston Lobsters. All tickets will be available for pick up during the day of the game at “Pass Gate,” which is located in the Front Atrium of the Times Union Center. For more information or to order tickets, please contact Meg Emery at memery@thealbanydevils.com or call (518) 433-8457. Saturday. January 9, 2016 Times Union Center 51 S. Pearl St., Albany, 12207 $13.00

Saturday, November 21 Sandra Bernhard is #blessed Benefit Concert

Bernhard’s live performances are a thrilling hybrid of standup comedy and rock ‘n roll, a raucous mix of political satire and pop culture commentary!

Limited VIP Packages (premiums seating, artist meet & greet and keepsake mug) are available at http://www.capitalpridecenter.org/events/sandra-bernhard-live-vip-package/ This show is a benefit for the Pride Center.

Saturday, November 21 Troy Savings Bank Music Hall 30 2nd St, Troy, NY 12180 8 pm Tickets $28 and up VIP $100

SAVE THE DATE SATURDAY JUNE 11, 2016 CAPITAL PRIDE 2016 Washington Park, Albany FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 4, 2016 2016 PRIDE CENTER GALA Hilton Albany 37

Calendar SPORTS / FUN & GAMES Gay Skate - Tuesdays - An open skate for the LGBTQ Community! $9.50 w. Skate Rental / $6.50 w. your own skates. For more info contact David at DB40@ AOL.com or (518) 573-3962 - 7-9:30pmRollarama Skating Center, 2710 Hamburg St., Schenectady Geek and Gaymer Night -Thursdays - 9pm- Rocks, 77 Central Ave, Albany (518) 472-3588 Capital Area Pride Bowlers (resumes after holidays, contact Dimas for details) Open to all. Sportsman Bowling Lanes, 1652 Crane St. Schenectady. More info Dimas (518) 894-1083. KARAOKE

Waterworks Pub - Mondays - 10pm - 2am, No Cover. (18+) 76 Central Ave, Albany, (518) 465-9079 Oh Bar - Thursdays - 10pm - 1am, No Cover. (21+) 304 Lark St., Albany, (518) 463-9004 Waterworks Pub - Fridays - 10pm 18+ (w. cover)- 76 Central Ave, Albany, (518) 465-9079 ROCKS - Fridays - 9pm-12am 77 Central Ave, Albany, (518) 472-3588 Circus Cafe - Saturdays -10pm - 2am, (21+) 392 Broadway, Saratoga, (518) 583-1106 Center Square Pub - Saturdays - 10pm - 2am, No Cover. 32 Dove St., Albany, (518) 729-2880

OPEN MIC / LITERARY Wednesday 8/ 12- Live from the Livingroom monthly poetry open mic- The Pride Center, Garden Level 332 Hudson Ave, Albany, (518) 4626138 Open Minded Mic & Talent Showcase (for all performers)- Every 1st & 3rd Thursday - sign up 8:30pm start 9:00pm - Rocks, 77 Central Ave., Albany - (518) 472-3588

Calendar

Variety Open Mic - Sundays - 10 pm - 12am - Waterworks Pub, 76 Central Ave Albany - (518) 465-9079 SOCIAL / SUPPORT GROUPS Out of the Closet I Am (for women who have sex with women): 1st & 3rd Wednesdays- 6:30pm-8pm Men’s Empowerment Group: 1st & 3rd Thursdays -6-7:30pm Voices of Unity (for Transgender people of color): 2nd & 4th Wednesday of each month from 6pm-7:30pm *Groups listed above meet at In Our Own Voices, 245 Lark St., Albany, (518) 432-4188 YouthPride! A student led meeting that centers around helping LGBTQ students and allied students discuss matters in our community, schools, and in their Gay Straight Alliances (GSAs) that they have in their schools. YouthPride provides leadership development and an opportunity to help plan activities around GLSEN’s Days of Action and Days of Support. 1st Friday of the month 6-9pm- Professor Java’s Coffee Sanctuary, 217 Wolf Rd., Colonie Trans Partners Group: provides support for people to discuss and explore their relationships with trans-identified or gender non-conforming individuals. Open to people currently in partnerships with trans-people or people exploring their gender identities. Monthly on Tuesdays at 5pm. Contact Faith Hoffman at faith@choicesconsulting.com for more information. Choices Counseling and Consulting, 523 Western Ave. Suite 2A Albany, NY 12203-1617, (518)438-2222 TRIVIA

Live Trivia with Frieda- Tuesdays ROCKS - 8-10pm 77 Central Ave, Albany, (518) 472-3588 Oh Bar - Wednesdays - 9pm-12am 304 Lark St., Albany, (518) 463-9004

SPECIAL COMMUNITY EVENTS Fall LGBT Dance Saturday November 7- 7:30 pm11:30pm - Colonie Elks Lodge-11 Elks Ln., Latham -COVER-$7.00 -Special Guest Performance by Singer Maureen DeLuke who will be singing 4 ballads. 50/50 Donation For the benefit of the SUICIDE PREVENTION. Eclectic Songs will be spinning your favorite dance hits from The Oldies to The Latest Top 40 Dance Hits. Requests will be taken at the Dance as well as providing Dance Videos. The Bar Will Be Open The Entire Dance! PLENTY OF SAFE PARKING!! PLEASE SPREAD THE WORD AND INVITE ALL YOUR FRIENDS—– ALL ARE WELCOME TO ATTEND! Bear Albany 10th Anniversary Party Friday November 13 - Sunday November 15 - multiple times and locationsFriday - 10pm - BEARAOKE MEAT & GREET at Waterworks Pub (76 Central Ave, Albany). Saturday -1pm- Cider Tasting at Nine Pin Ciderworks tasting room (929 Broadway, Albany) followed by dinner at TanPoPo Ramen and Sake Bar (893 Broadway, Albany) 9pm - The Main Event - Come celebrate 10 years of BEAR ALBANY doing it right! Dance, drink, connect at Rocks (77 Central Ave, Albany). Sunday- Early Breakfast at Dolan's (75 Central Ave., Albany) - opens 8am- Brunch at McGeary's Irish Pub (4 Clinton Square, Albany) - 12pm Pride Center Holiday Networking & Comedy Event - Featuring Jaye McBride and Shawn Gille - Thursday, December 3 - The Comedy Works - 500 Northern Blvd., Albany, 12204- Tickets are $20 and must be purchased in advance at www.capitalpridecenter.org or by calling (518) 462-6138

Send the details of your event and a brief description to sminchin@capitalpridecenter. org by the 15th of the month preceding your event. *event listings may be edited for space and content.

Your Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Queer Com m unity Center since 1970

OUR PROGRAMS INCLUDE Center Youth: Support, outreach & advocacy for LGBTQA youth ages 18 and under. Programs include regional groups, Albany Youth Organizing! (AYO!) Drop in Space, HIV testing, the Center Youth Action Team, opportunities with legislators, and annual events. We support schools in 11 counties by providing training for staff and students on how to support LGBTQA youth.

Trans Pride: Promoting the wellbeing of transgender and gender non-conforming communities in a safe, empowering space through social opportunities, community building, peer support, resource sharing and advocacy.

Vintage Pride: Connecting LGBTQ older adults to each other and to the broader community with monthly social Training & Education Services : Creating safer spaces gatherings, special events, educational and leadership and services for LGBTQ people in the Capital Region by opportunities, and celebrating their resilience and offering comprehensive, high quality, individualized community contributions. trainings for mental health and medical providers, Business Alliance: Business Alliance members gain colleges, businesses, organizations, and any entity exclusive visibility, ways to leverage customer allegiance & seeking to improve services for LGBTQ individuals and access to a dedicated consumer base. Monthly Mixers to communities. meet up with friends, distribute business cards, and make Center Fam ilies: Helping LGBTQ headed families in the Capital Region achieve their goals of building and sustaining happy and healthy families through providing ongoing social and community building opportunities.

Center Support: Offering low-cost counseling, and peer support groups such as Men’s Group, Women’s Group, and Family and Friends of LGBTQ people. Also providing comprehensive and culturally specific referrals for LGBTQ individuals. Rainbow Café has been open since 1971 and is an open community space for recurring events such as Game Nights & Supper Sunday. Center Arts: Our Romaine Brooks Gallery is a creative space and outlet for LGBTQ artists and themed work. LGBTQ Book Club also meets monthly to discuss works written by LGBTQ authors.

332 HUDSON AVE. ALBANY, NY 12210

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important business contacts. .

Capital PRIDE: As the producer of the largest annual Capital Pride celebration in Upstate NY, the Pride Center brings a record breaking 30,000 festival and parade attendees, and 35,000 people celebrating throughout PRIDE week each year. Com m UNITY Magazine: The Pride Center’s monthly publication highlights & informs the larger Capital Region on local LGBTQ news and events as well as supports other LGBTQ organizations. Over 3,000 avid readers reached per month across 10 counties. CapitalPrideCenter1 CapitalPrideCtr

518-4 62-6138

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W W W .CAPITALPRIDECENTER.ORG

Our m ission is to prom ote the w ell-being of all lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer identified people and those affected by discrim ination based on gender identity and expression. 39

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332 Hudson Avenue Albany, NY 12210

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