Community Vol 4 Issue 3 (May-June 2016) by Pride Center of the Capital Region

VOL 4 ISSUE 3 | IN THIS ISSUE: A PUBLICATION OF THE

MAY/JUNE 2016

FACING AN UNCOMFORTABLE HISTORY | DECOLONIZE! NOT DIVERSIFY! RESOURCES FOR WHITE PEOPLE |

PRIDE CENTER EVENTS commUNITY MAY-JUNE 2016

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PARADE PARTICIPANTS, FESTIVAL VENDORS Capital PRIDE Registration Deadline June 1, 2016 Download the Registration Packet WWW.CapitalprideCenter.org/pride Capital pride 2016 - June 11 - lark st / Washington park Questions? ContaCt steven @ (518)462-6138

sMinChin@CapitalprideCenter.org

Capital PRIDE is produced by the Pride Center of the Capital Region 2 |

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* Wa

pRiDE CElEbRation may 12th - JunE 11th

Capital pRiDE paRaDE & FEstival satuRDay JunE 11th 12-5 pm laRk stREEt & Washington paRk, albany

WWW.CapitalpRiDECEntER.oRg / pRiDE 332 huDson avE., albany | (518) 462-6138 commUNITY MAY-JUNE 2016

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CONTENTS

MAY / JUNE 2016 VOL 4 ISSUE 3

Features

Columns

News, information, and updates

10 Ask the Lawyer BY GERI POMERANTZ

6 L etters from the Publisher and Co-Editor

12 To Be a Blessing

34 Weekly Events Calendar

2016 Center Youth Celebration &Scholarship Reception PHOTOS BY JAY ZHANG

BY AUDREY SEIDMAN

14 What to Look For In A Therapist BY TIMOTHY CRUMLEY 19 Decolonize! Not Diversify! BY DEIDRE DUMPSON

16 Trans View BY MOONHAWK RIVER STONE

25 Ask Mark Your Tax Questions BY MARK WITECKI

26 Out in the Garden BY JUDITH FETTERLEY

23 Facing an Uncomfortable History BY ALYSSA HACKETT

29 The Fashionable and the Frivolous BY ALAN BENNET ILAGAN

31 Here’s Guffman BY PATRICK WHITE

35 Special Events Calendar 35 Affiliates Calendar 36 CommUNITY Calendar 37 Advertisers Index 38 Pride Center Programs

ON THE COVER Capital PRIDE Volunteer ,Victoria PHOTO CREDITS Cover: © Dawn Sylvester Opposite & Page 7: © Jay Zhang

33 Michael Cooks and You Can Too BY MICHAEL MEAD

“ Where are we as an LGBT community over 45 years after the Stonewall Rebellion?...Sylvia Rivea warned us about becoming a movement that was only for white, middle class people. And 45 years later, the most marginalized of our communities are still struggling ” - Laverne Cox 4 |

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ABOUT COMMUNITY MAGAZINE CommUNITY Magazine is published bi-monthly by the Pride Center of the Capital Region, 332 Hudson Avenue, Albany NY 12210. Telephone (518) 462-6138. Entire contents © 2016 Capital District Gay & Lesbian Community Council d/b/a Pride Center of the Capital Region. Reproductions in whole or in part without express permission of the publisher are strictly prohibited. CommUNITY Magazine welcomes submissions of articles & artwork of interest to lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer people in the Capital Region. Editorial and advertising deadline is the 5th of each month. Written work should be submitted electronically with author’s name and phone number to mweidrich@capitalpridecenter.org Opinions expressed in CommUNITY Magazine are those of the authors and are not necessarily those of the Pride Center of the Capital Region, its Board, Staff or Volunteers. Letters to the Publisher may be sent to Michael Weidrich at mweidrich@capitalpridecenter.org. Letters must be 100 words or less and must include contact information (name, phone, email). To receive home delivery of CommUNITY please send your address to sminchin@capitalpridecenter.org or mail your request to 332 Hudson Ave, Albany, NY 12210

2016 CENTER YOUTH

CELEBRATION & SCHOLARSHIP RECEPTION

ON APRIL 20TH, 2016 THE PRIDE CENTER CELEBRATED THE CONTRIBUTIONS OF YOUTH LEADERS FROM ACROSS THE CAPITAL REGION AT OUR 2ND ANNUAL CENTER YOUTH CELEBRATION AND SCHOLARSHIP RECEPTION. FOURTEEN MEMBERS OF THE CENTER YOUTH ACTION TEAM WERE RECOGNIZED FOR THE EFFORTS TO ENSURE SAFER, MORE AFFIRMING SCHOOLS AND COMMUNITIES FOR LGBTQA YOUNG PEOPLE THROUGHOUT THE REGION. FOUR GRADUATING SENIORS WERE ALSO AWARDED SCHOLARSHIPS FOR THE ACADEMIC AND COMMUNITY ACHIEVEMENTS. WE ARE PROUD TO SHARE SPACE WITH THESE TREMENDOUS YOUNG LEADERS. WE CANNOT WAIT TO SEE WHAT’S NEXT FOR THEM AS THEY CONTINUE ON THEIR PATHS. PHOTOGRAPHS © JAY ZHANG

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LETTER FROM THE guest editor BOARD OF DIRECTORS:

Patricia K. Wood, PRESIDENT Joseph Kerwin, VICE PRESIDENT Paul Patel, 2ND VICE PRESIDENT Jeffrey Dyber, TREASURER Gretchel Hathaway, Ph.D, SECRETARY Joseph Bailey Timothy Beebe John Daniels Vincent Lanzone Angela D. Ledford, Ph.D Tiffany Ramos Linda Richardson, Ph.D IMMEDIATE PAST PRESIDENT:

Kenneth P. Mortensen, Jr.

PRIDE CENTER STAFF:

Lyndon Cudlitz

DIRECTOR OF TRAINING AND EDUCATION

Deidre Dumpson

STREET OUTREACH WORKER

Alyssa Hackett PROGRAMS SUPERVISOR

Jeremy Hollon

PROGRAM ASSISTANT AND VOLUNTEER COORDINATOR

Luke Lavera

EXECUTIVE ASSISTANT

Steven Minchin

COMMUNICATIONS & SPECIAL PROJECTS SUPERVISOR

James Shultis

DIRECTOR OF PROGRAMS

Lauren Simone PROGRAMS SUPERVISOR

Michael Weidrich EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR & CEO

OUR MISSION The mission of the Pride Center of the Capital Region is to promote the wellbeing of all lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer identified people and those affected by discrimination based on gender identity and expression. 6 |

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“We might use our position at the bottom, however, to make a clear leap into revolutionary action. If Black Women were free, it would mean that everyone else would have to be free since our freedom would necessitate the destruction of all the systems of oppression.” -Combahee River Collective, 1975

When I have taken the time to reflect on the U.S. culture and what specific ideals have unraveled into the unfortunate circumstances that marginalized people face, one of the most damaging, is the idea of a unified nation, with a unified culture and unified thought. This very idea is what has led to othering, assimilation, lifelong journeys to discover truths, lost history and relinquish emptiness from feeling like you just don’t belong. Learning of the complexities of my various identities and how they interplay with each other to formulate my personal lived experiences was one of the most beautiful understandings I have ever achieved in my life. To discuss the unique culture and oppressions of being a Black-American, Trini-American, Low Income, Queer-Identified, formally educated, Feminist, Womyn of Color has not only forced me into some hard places to unpack all of the things that I have faced, but it has also allowed me to grow and love myself in ways that I have never experienced before. A privilege like this, to learn of myself and others like me, is one that so many Queer People of Color are not afforded though. This being because the mainstream LGBTQ* movement has fallen to adopting the ways of the dominant culture in trying to unify us in ways that erase everything unique about being a Queer Person of Color. To watch this movement progress from the very things that have advanced movements against Racism, but give no acknowledgments is erasure. Adopting QPOC culture by yelling “SLAYYY” and “YASSS”, but not showing up when our Trans* Sisters and Brothers are being violently murdered is appropriation without appreciation. I myself have shown up and watched other Queer People of Color show up for the LGBTQ* movement despite its exclusivity. I have watched QPOC community love, cry and heal with our White community counterparts. But for this issue, I ask that we all reflect and truly ask ourselves, when will people start to show up for us? Hear our cries? Put their bodies, minds and souls on the line for us, too. It is time for us as a community to take the time to heal, for White LGBTQIA* community members to show up and take accountability. It is time for us to stop erasing and hiding our differences and shift to embracing, highlighting and celebrating them. Deidre Dumpson Street Outreach Worker

LETTER FROM THE publisher This past January, I attended the National LGBTQ Taskforce’s Creating Change Conference in Chicago. The first day was day-long Racial Justice Institute, during which there came a point in the day when they separate us into two groups –white and People of Color (POC). I panicked! As a bi-racial person, half white and half Asian/Pacific Islander (API), I didn’t know which group to go to. Thankfully, the organizers said that all bi and multi-racial people should go into the POC group. But for those of us that identify as such, it was distressing to not know where we belonged. Later that day, there was a special session specifically for bi & multi-racial LGBTQ people. We were given a list entitled “Experiences of Racially Mixed People” that had almost 50 experiences. I checked off over 30 experiences I have had including being asked “What am I?”, being told “You look exotic.”, people are confused by my last name as it doesn’t “match” me, and many more. While it was quite triggering and somewhat traumatic to go through this list, I took solace in the fact that I wasn’t alone as I was with other bi & multi-racial people who have experienced the same things. Be well and be empowered! Michael Weidrich Executive Director & CEO Pride Center of the Capital Region

2016 CENTER YOUTH

CELEBRATION & SCHOLARSHIP RECEPTION

THE PRIDE CENTER IS PROUD TO RECOGNIZE THE FOLLOWING YOUTH SCHOLARSHIP RECIPIENTS: DAVID, GLADYS, & CANDACE GROUDINE SCHOLARSHIPS: GIANNA ROSS (COLONIE CENTRAL HIGH SCHOOL); JACK EINSTEIN (SHAKER HIGH SCHOOL) GREGG STEIN SCHOLARSHIP: RAINA BRIGGS (BETHLEHEM HIGH SCHOOL) PRIDE CENTER YOUTH SCHOLARSHIP: CECELIA MARY LONGO (EMMA WILLARD SCHOOL)

PHOTOGRAPHS © JAY ZHANG

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For more Groups, Meetings and Events at the Pride Center and across our community see the calendars on pages 34-37 and online at www. capitalpridecenter.org

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PRIDE Brunch on the patio 11:30am - 2:00pm Sundays th May 15 & 22nd | june 5th & 12th

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Ask the Lawyer BY GERI POMERANTZ

The NEw york state court of appeals has accepted two cases of great interest to the lgbtq community, concerning the rights of nonbiological and nonadoptive parents In last month’s column, I reported on a lesbian custody case that is on appeal to the Court of Appeals, New York’s highest court. As of this writing, Mtr of Brooke v. Elizabeth, (regarding parental rights of a parent who is not legally or biologically related to a child) is scheduled for oral argument on June 2, 2016. Meanwhile, the Second Department of the Appellate Division (the mid-level appellate court in Brooklyn), issued an important decision in another lesbian custody case, Mtr of Kelly S v. Farah M, on April 6, 2016. The Appellate Division held that a child born to one spouse during a California same-sex marriage, or during a California registered domestic partnership, will be recognized as the child of both mothers in New York, with the right to seek custody or visitation of that child in New York . Kelly and Farah, while living in California, entered into a registered domestic partnership (RDP) in 2004. The women then had 3 children together in California. In 2005, Kelly gave birth to their first child, “I”. Farah legally adopted “I” and this child is therefore not the subject of the litigation. Then, Farah gave birth to “Z” in 2007, during the RDP. Thereafter, Farah and Kelly got married in California in 2008. In 2009, Farah gave birth to “E”. All 3 children were conceived through artificial insemination (AID), with the donated sperm of the couple’s friend, Anthony S (the known donor). The AID took place in their home, without the assistance of a medical professional, and no one signed a written consent to the AID. Although she never adopted them, “Z” and “E” both have Kelly’s last name 10 |

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and she is listed as their parent on their birth certificates. In 2012 the family moved to New York. In the summer of 2013, Kelly and Farah separated. Kelly left the state and Farah remained in New York with the three children. Farah would not allow Kelly access to “Z” and “ E”, and Kelly filed a New York Family Court petition seeking visitation with her children. Farah claimed that Kelly had no right to seek parenting time with “Z” because Z was born before their marriage and the marital presumption should not apply to a child born during a RDP. As to “E”, who was born after they got married, Farah claimed that because they did not follow the procedure outlined in the New York statute for establishing the legitimacy of a child born by AID, Kelly could not be deemed “E’s” parent. Farah further claimed that any presumption that Kelly was E’s parent because of their marriage was rebutted by the fact that the known donor was really E’s father. She also filed a petition seeking to have the sperm donor declared the children’s father. The family court judge ruled in favor of Kelly, holding that she was the parent of both children and therefore has the right to seek custody and visitation of the children. Once the family court determined that Kelly had standing to seek visitation, the next step in the process would be a hearing to determine what parenting schedule would be in the best interest of the children. But Farah appealed. The Appellate Division affirmed the Family Court order. The Appellate Division clarified what should not need clarification in 2016. First, even though New York did not have marriage equality when the couple was married, New York does and did recognize the marriage. Similarly, NY courts must recognize parentage created by another state’s laws. Thus, if Kelly is recognized as the parent under California law, NY must recognize her as the children’s parent. Under California law, a child born to a mother during a marriage, or a RDP, is presumed to be the child of the mother’s spouse, or partner. Additionally, under California law, if a child is born before her birth mother marries or

enters a RDP, and another person is named on the child’s birth certificate as a parent, and that person later marries or enters a RDP with the birth mother, that spouse or parent is presumed to be the child’s parent. Thus, because of their marriage (and/or RDP) in California, and/ or because Kelly was listed as the parent on the birth certificates and later married the birth mother, Kelly was clearly both children’s parent under the parentage laws of CA. The court held that based on the California law, NY must recognize Kelly as the children’s parent. Importantly, the Appellate Division did not end its discussion there. It also held that the failure of the parents to comply with California’s, and/ or New York’s, AID laws did not preclude recognizing Kelly as a parent. Both NY and California have statutes that provide for a presumption that a child born to a married woman through AID performed by a medical provider with the spouse’s written consent is the child of the spouse. However, if the AID is performed at home without a medical professional, and without written consents, these statutes don’t apply. The Appellate Division clarified that the AID statute is not intended to be the exclusive means to establish parentage of a spouse when a child is conceived using AID. Importantly, the Appellate Division here relied on a NY case recognizing paternity of a husband of a child born to the wife during the marriage through artificial insemination to demonstrate that NY public policy promotes recognition of parental rights to children born during a marriage. (Readers may remember prior columns discussing NY cases where courts did not uphold the marital presumption in same sex marriages.) It is also of note that the Appellate Division gave short shrift to Farah’s paternity petition against Anthony S, explicitly finding that Farah may not try to rebut the California presumption of Kelly’s parentage based on the facts here. The court noted that the paternity petition was filed only in an attempt to terminate Kelly’s parental rights, and that it was clear that Kelly and Farah had made a mutual decision to have children together and both were the children’s parents.

Notably, NY’s marital presumption law is not as clearly worded as California’s law is, with respect to children who were born prior to the marriage. Until there is a clear case to rely on, if your child was born before your marriage in New York, a non birth parent who has not adopted the child should not rely on the New York marital presumption to protect her parentage rights in the event of separation or termination of the marriage. And, if there is no legal relationship between the parents, the non birth parent has no parental rights in New York unless and until the Court of Appeals rules to the contrary. Moreover, please do keep in mind that the marital presumption for children born during a marriage is simply that, a presumption. A presumption can be rebutted. In other words, the birth parent could try to present proof that the spouse is not the other parent. At least until the Court of Appeals rules definitely on this issue, the best protection of the parent child relationship in the event of separation or divorce is to adopt, even if the child is born during a marriage. It is hopeful that the Court of Appeals will resolve this issue favorably to protect parent child relationships.

the best protection of the parent child relationship in the event of seperation or divorce is to adopt, eve if the child is born during a marriage The legal rights of LGBTQ families are an everchanging landscape, to be addressed monthly in this column. The material in this article is provided for informational purposes only and is not intended to give legal advice, and should not substitute for the independent advice of counsel. Readers are urged to consult an attorney for legal advice. The views expressed in this column are solely those of Ms. Pomerantz and do not reflect the opinion of the Pride Center. Geri Pomerantz is an attorney in the capital district with a practice focused on family and matrimonial law, specifically including LGBTQ families. Geri conducts continuing legal education training for other lawyers, and conducts community education, on issues of importance to the LGBTQ community. She can be reached at GPEsq@pomerantzlaw.org.

Men’s Pride For gay, bisexual, transgender, same-gender-loving, queer, and questioning men ages 18+ Meets Every Monday at 7pm 1st, 3rd & 5th Mondays - Discussion Group 2nd & 4th Mondays - Social Gathering at the Pride Center of the Capital Region 332 Hudson Ave, Albany - Garden Level For more information on Men’s Pride call (518) 462-6138 or ahackett@capitalpridecenter.org

For more information on Women’s Pride call (518) 462-6138 or lsimone@capitalpridecenter.org

Women’s Pride For lesbian, bisexual, transgender, same-gender-loving, queer, and questioning women ages 18+ Meets on alternating Wednesdays at 6pm 2nd Wednesday–Social 4th Wednesday– Discussion at the Pride Center of the Capital Region 332 Hudson Ave, Albany - 1st Floor commUNITY MAY-JUNE 2016

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To Be a Blessing BY RENATE REEVES-ELLINGTON

Transitioning Toward Love

Content warning: description of dream involving murder. I

am a 78-year-old transgender woman who discovered late in life that I am female. My understanding of who I am evolved over more than a decade before I was able to become my true self and be accepted as Renate. My journey was fraught with pitfalls, toxic environments, self-hate, and anger. To get to peace as a woman, I had to rescue my soul -- not an easy task. My religious and spiritual grounding came from my grandparents. They taught me acceptance of all, love for the land, unconditional love, and love for God through bible stories and church attendance. My parents, on the other hand, introduced me to the toxic environments created by alcoholic rage and abuse. They taught me to hate myself, deceive others, and retreat into a shell. Even though I was very accepting of others regardless of race, color, or creed, once I reached puberty – that point in life when boys become more masculine and girls more feminine – I was never fully accepted by my male peers. I just didn’t fit in. The taunting and bullying reinforced and fueled the rage I had internalized from my parents. Little did I realize at the time there was a darker self-hatred lurking. There were hints that I was transgender through reoccurring nightmares. The scariest nightmare started about the ninth grade and continued until I was about 55. I am covered in the blood of a little girl. I have murdered her and am trying to hide her. I stuffed her into a suitcase, took her to a rocky place, and buried her. When no one is reported missing, I go out and dig up the suitcase to 12 |

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be certain she is dead. She is still bloody. Keep in mind that these were the 1950s, ‘60s, ‘70s and ‘80s; there were no resources, no Internet, no dream interpretation that would lead me to understand that I was transgender and the girl in these dreams was me. This is not to say that I sat around in a fog of self-loathing. I joined the service, married and had children, worked in industry, divorced and remarried. I was successful – sort of. I was still rejected by male peers. This led to frequent job changes. Religion and spirituality had disappeared from my life.

My journey was fraught with pitfalls. Reconnecting with God I began to hike. Hiking gradually became a venue for awareness of God. The mountains brought serenity and solitude, even with other hikers around. With my soul at peace, I started hearing the Holy Spirit and feeling God in my surroundings. I started to identify my spirit and inner self as more female than male. This caused anxiety in me for about 15 years. Toward the end of this period, I became far more comfortable presenting as female. I felt spiritually alive as a woman, felt at home as a woman as I did in nature. Of great importance, the nightmares disappeared. I still presented male most of time, but was feeling more and more like an imposter. I was an imposter – a woman pretending to be a man. When I was 60 it was decision time. The decision to become my true self arrived – at a cost. The loss of my wife, distance from my son, and the passage of time that it took for the spouse of one

of my daughters to accept me. Human love for me was guarded, grudging, and often heartbreaking. I projected the lack of self-love onto others and felt they could not love me. It was time to love myself and others. I had found God in nature and had started listening to the Holy Spirit for direction in my life. But Christ and His gospel were missing. One day, I opened my Episcopal prayer book. Love your God with all your heart and all your soul. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. I felt touched and realized that I needed a church community to feel complete. In late 2010 I discovered St Andrews. From the moment I walked through the front door I felt love and acceptance. Those feelings have been affirmed and reaffirmed. Starting with Rev. Mary accepting me as a transgender person, then others who were not just caring, but very accepting, and a liturgy that is almost designed for my state of mind, I have felt at home. I was voted onto the Vestry in 2013, became a Junior Warden in 2016, cochef of our monthly “love your neighbor dinner,” and representative to the diocese in 2016. I am at peace with who I am, and I am learning to love others and myself. This article is one of a series provided by Advocates for Welcoming Congregations, a Capital Region group that encourages the welcoming of LGBT persons into the full life and leadership of communities of faith. The group also works to make visible for members of the LGBT community opportunities for practicing their faith traditions.

Renate is active in transgender education and advocacy. She co-manages a Times Union blog, Transgender Talk and a Facebook page, Affirming Transgender Rights.

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What to look for in a Therapist By Timothy Crumley, MHC

Fortunately, our field has begun shifting toward a more strength based, socially-aware model of therapy When I was in high school, I decided I wanted to study psychology – and eventually become a therapist – to help those whom I saw as “struggling with mental illness.” I wanted to be someone who listened and “treated” people who I saw as “suffering,” and where I played a role in their eventual recovery and some “final achievement” in mental wellness What’s wrong with that view? As I began to study and practice psychology, I learned and realized my original viewpoints: 1. Were based on my ego, one fostered by various layers of societal privilege that allowed for the internal belief: I am the all-powerful healer. 2. Assumed that I was the am healthy one and therefore my clients were “sick” – leaving me with all the power. 3. Suggested I could heal/fix others with a wave of my magic wand. As much as I once wished I had a magic wand to heal all the world’s sorrows, I am relieved to realize that I don’t have the responsibility to be the one who fixes. The assumptions I made as a kid regarding what my role as a therapist would be, are often held by many practicing counselors and psychologists today. Thankfully my education and experiences have allowed me to broaden and even change my perspectives. Fortunately, our field has begun shifting toward a more strength based, socially-aware model of therapy. Power is always a factor at play between any client and therapist. All therapists are in a position of power, given the nature of the counseling 14 |

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relationship. While my old views neglected to acknowledge this fact, I now understand my responsibility. My role is to shed light on the client’s strengths and resilience, as well as societal challenges the client faces, rather than just “internal issues” the client or I might see as well. As a therapist, I’ve learned to look at my client’s distress (assuming you have some) and mental illness (assuming you’ve been labeled with such) as being the possible result of external factors, instead of just some inherent thing within you. You’re not necessarily the one presenting with “a problem.” Rather, the problem is often embedded in our society, and distress or “mental illness” is at least partly – if not entirely - a response to these external factors. Often, our experiences are a combination of external influence and internal perception and response. Carl Rogers, one of my counseling heroes, suggested anyone we come into contact with will place “conditions of worth” on us. For example, all children require love, affection, and safety from the adults in their life. These adults also have expectations for appropriate behavior. I remember as a child my father would express a stern, angry tone and usually say something dry and sarcastic whenever I did something he disapproved of, such as when I asked to do something for the eighth time after being told “no!” seven times. Such moments were incredibly scary; even though I now understand these moments in context. Getting in trouble often meant that our safety, love, and affection were at risk, and unless we conformed to house rules we would not receive these things. Ultimately, our survival felt like it was at risk when we did not conform. Sound familiar? These conditions can also turn into unspoken, large-scale expectations and standards that exclude you when you don’t conform. When discrimination

and societal privilege are at play, you may try to keep up with these expectations, which usually requires you to deviate from your true thoughts, beliefs, behaviors, and expression so as to please others. When this happens, you risk feeling chronically distressed, unfulfilled, perhaps using substances to cope. You can become depressed or anxious, and may experience a host of other mental health related issues. If you have refused to live a lie, you have likely experienced being shunned and discriminated against in some way. Let’s say a client came to me today in distress, a gay male struggling with body image, substance use, and perhaps dating expectations. I would provide a space for us to identify his thoughts, perspectives, and feelings through our conversation together, where we observe how he is (or isn’t) living by his own internal values, and identify who’s values he is trying to satisfy. Together, we would work to close the gap between his “true self” and the fronts he has likely maintained to survive, including recreational drug use and excessive dieting. This requires me, as a therapist, to be respectful and non-judgmental, as well as be a good listener. Providing this environment helps ensure that conditions of worth are absent, allowing the client to share their true thoughts, perceptions, desires and goals. The client’s own strengths, resilience, and goals are then used to decrease, if not eliminate, the presenting issues. We all deserve a space to be ourselves and find out who we are, even if our society has taught us otherwise. Timothy Crumley, MHC is a part-time mental health counselor with Choices Counseling & Consulting and a graduate of the University at Albany. He has experience working with families, couples, and individuals who identify as LGBTQ, children, and those struggling with substance abuse, and he believes you are the best expert on you.

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T R A N S V I E W BY MOONHAWK RIVER STONE

Tarnished Pride... Bathroom Anyone? Everyone? There’s the Larson Far Side cartoon with the two deer, one saying to the other, “Bummer of a birthmark, Hal.” when one of the deer has a very clear target “birthmark” on its chest. It’s one of my favorites, a good laugh posing as an enduring steadfast way to cope with the targeting of LGBT people by the religious right and conservative legislators. Well, we’ve gotten same-sex marriage, and it seems the challenges to that are quickly evaporating in some ways (not all for sure), but here we are again, that birthmark showing itself in the new found spate of religious freedom laws designed to discriminate against LGBT people and especially transgender people. More and more of my clients are coming in expressing distress and complaining about the experience of being specifically targeted for discrimination that is institutionalized at the state legislative level. The sense people have of “They’re after us!” is tremendously heightened right now. The widow of one of my oldest and dearest friends lives in North Carolina, and you should hear what she has to say about her legislators and governor--none of it printable. She is outraged that she, too, as a staunch ally to the LGBT community, is, herself, now a target. For someone who survived the Nazis in Holland as a small child nearly starving to death in hiding she’s not going quietly about this. She’s clear you don’t take this kind of bigotry in silence. Above all, I want to visit her this summer, and now, really can’t. I can’t trust myself to go to North Carolina and behave myself-not to be vicious and rude to people demanding they stop their discriminatory insanity. I would never really act that out that, because after all, I’ve got that target on my chest. And they do carry guns in North Carolina. But the legislature in passing this law has infected the whole state with their anti-LGBT bias and innocent supporters such as my friend are the dolphins in the tuna net, caught up without their consent. As a minister I have an 16 |

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equally compelling challenge about how to express my anger and outrage without crossing the lines of the nonviolence to which I am deeply committed. For some of my more sheltered and privileged clients, being a target is a new and frightening experience, one that more often paralyzes and limits than invigorates and redirects the anger and pain into advocacy and activism. Sure, there’s more than plenty of negative response to the laws in North Carolina and Mississippi, and plenty of support by republicans in other states who have acted bravely and in accordance with our Constitution. There is a big ferment out there, and I’m feeling a bit like, for once, us trans folks will not have to do all the heavy lifting. But beyond all the easy statements by companies and economic sanctions against the states with these laws, are these 1%-ers going to really show up? Are they going to give millions of dollars in contributions to the LGBT and Trans advocacy organizations fighting these laws, bringing litigation? Are their $1000/hr attorneys going to join the fray? Are they going to go behind those closed doors, those of us with the targets on our chest are not privileged to open and go toe-to-toe with legislators until they relent? I certainly hope so, but I’m doubtful. It’s nice right now to feel the warmth of all that easy to reach support, but there’s the hard dirty work of getting things repealed--once and for all. And that will take these 1% allies way out of their comfort zone. Historically bathroom usage has been by custom for the most part, except during the segregation times when bathrooms were divided by race. Otherwise the idea of men’s and women’s rooms developed as a custom as indoor plumbing became available. Us folks in the trans community watching the state and national political landscape kept wondering when the target was going to show up on our bathroom doors. We worked 2 decades to prevent and defer any and all legislation regarding bathroom access for transgender people. We felt pretty darn good about that accomplishment. Along the way many fine educational materials and curriculum were developed to counter such prejudice and lack of access. Every time there was a challenge to the

New York City transgender law (passed in 2003) regarding the bathroom--we won. We were confident that was creating a body of law that seemed like, maybe not a mountain, but certainly a good sized hill of solid case law. There were certainly setbacks, but once the Cruzan case was decided in federal court we were on our way. The shorthand for the Cruzan case is that the bigot got the single seater bathroom, not the transgender person, turning the problem around to the proper focus--the bigot. Then the last big one hit--same sex marriage became law--and just like that there we were, totally exposed and targeted. The religious right needed to feed its coffers with another target and that target was transgender people and trans rights, especially our right to pee. With the religious right running out of LGB things to be bigoted about, it was the Trans community’s time to be the target--and wow, are we. The religious right stirred up hysteria born of the finest of ignorance and whipped it to a perfect meringue and shoved it into state houses to “protect women and children” from men in the women’s bathroom. Notice that not much if anything is written about women in men’s bathrooms. It seems that trans women are the ultimate threat to sanctity of the women and children in bathrooms. The bills’ absurdly state that one’s birth certificate is the entry key to the proper bathroom. What? Are we all going to get magnetic cards we have to scan before we enter any public bathroom to make sure the right birth certificate is in the right bathroom? And what about the places where one can change one’s birth certificate without genital reconstruction? What then? Chaos? Interestingly enough this crazed display of the gender binary cult is happening just when we were all getting okay about the bathroom. Things always get really bad just before you win. Through our outrage, we need to remember that. These bills are an interesting combination of bigotry against transgender people combined with religious bias against LGBT people who are no longer “allowed” to shop in the establishments of the religious right because our very existence is offensive and a violation of their religious freedom. In a moment of pique,

T R A N S V I E W #141©

The sense people have of “They’re after us!” is tremendously heightened right now. I could say “back at ya”. Sometimes in my weary humanness, I wish “May they all go bankrupt with their mean spiritedness”. Maybe we shouldn’t just boycott the states with these laws, but develop a list of businesses where we are not welcome, publish their names (shame on them!) and ask people--LGBT people and our allies to boycott them. It worked with grapes after all. I’m not so worried about the “religious freedom” part of these bills, because I think that argument has a growing body of case law against. In America, it is still illegal to pass legislation that deliberately and intentionally targets a group of people for discrimination (Colorado Proposition 2 decision). So while it’s a lot of tedious busy work to overturn these illegal discrimination bills, good will prevail there. It’s marrying the transgender person’s right to pee with the religious right’s right to discriminate that is a particularly odious combination to tease apart and to have bathroom freedom for transgender people prevail. Already the economic pressure has had some effect on North Carolina and Governor Pat McCrory has begun to dismantle parts of the law through executive orders and calling for the introduction of legislation for LGBT civil rights. Noticeably absent in his efforts is anything mentioning our right to pee in peace. So it’s a big stay tuned and as summer heats up we need to keep heating up the pressure economically and socially to have these bills rightfully flushed down the toilet. But this year, it’s a Tarnished Pride season for me knowing so many of my Trans community members are living under a new regime of bigotry and discrimination being targets for others’ hatred. Until next time....T Rev. Moonhawk River Stone of Riverstone Consulting is an Interfaith Minister, transgender activist, writer, educator, consultant, keynote speaker and psychotherapist in private practice for over 25 years with experience and extensive expertise in all aspects of transgender policy and health.

Trans Pride Trans Pride

The Trans Pride program is dedicated to empowering trans* and gender non-conforming people and their allies through social opportunities, community building, resource sharing, and advocacy.

The Trans Pride program is dedicated to empowering trans* and gender Discussion Group & Greet non-conforming people and Meet their allies A discussion group opportunities, An informal social evening through social community focusing on issues for trans* people to building, resource sharing, and advocacy. important to trans* people and community. 1st Tuesdays, 7-9PM

connect and build community. 3rd Tuesdays, 7-9PM

The Discussion Group and Meet & Greet are open to all trans* people and those questioning their gender, ages 18+. Trans* denotes a wide range of people including those who identify as transgender, transsexual, two-spirit, genderqueer, gender-non-conforming, questioning their gender, and more. We use the asterisk to help us remember that trans* identities and experiences are diverse, while still sharing a common thread. All meetings take place at the Pride Center, 332 Hudson Avenue, Albany

P: 518.462.6138 PROGRAMS@CAPITALPRIDECENTER.ORG www.capitalpridecenter.org

Discussion Group - A discussion group focusing on issues important to trans* people and community. 1st Tuesdays, 7-9PM Meet & Greet - An informal social evening for trans* people to connect and build community. 3rd Tuesdays, 7-9PM

www.capitalpridecenter.org commUNITY MAY-JUNE 2016

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QueerEngineer Get to know us & how you can support LGBTQ* students in science, technology, engineering, & mathematics. /QueerEngineer

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pridecenter OF THE CAPITAL REGION

@QueerEngineer

A Pride Center of the Capital Region affiliate

DECOLONIZE! NOT DIVERSIFY! by DEIDRE DUMPSON

“Those of us who stand outside the circle of this society’s definition of acceptable women; those of us who have been forged in the crucibles of difference -- those of us who are poor, who are lesbians, who are Black, who are older -- know that survival is not an academic skill. It is learning how to take our differences and make them strengths. For the master’s tools will never dismantle the master’s house. They may allow us temporarily to beat him at his own game, but they will never enable us to bring about genuine change. And this fact is only threatening to those women who still define the master’s house as their only source of support.”

histories and cultures. Diversity tells oppressed people that they are welcome into spaces, but there is no room for a shift in the problematic policies and norms that previously and currently exist at these institutions.

THE PROBLEM WITH DIVERSITY

When this land was originally colonized there was an automatic shift in language, culture, religion and overall politics. There was an immediate need for a unified body of people and with that need came the assumption that their ways were the best for all people.

-Audre Lorde, The Master’s Tools Will Never Dismantle the Master’s House

Looking at mainstream social movements today, we see a unified push for diversity. Leading activists preach about having every oppressed community being offered a seat at the table, a piece of the pied, but with that push no one has been ready to discuss the real question that follows up the push for diversity. At what cost? This is the problem with what diversity has become today. In The Master’s Tools Will Never Dismantle the Master’s House, Audre Lorde speaks to the fact that embracing the culture and practices of the dominant community will not save oppressed people nor provide the change that we are actually seeking. With diversity today, we have only made a shift from being exclusive to certain identities to including those identities at the cost of their

By implementing plans to only increase the presence of certain communities in specific exclusive places we are allowing the systems to continue as is. We are simply asking for different identities to be there, to coexist in the very spaces that originally existed to erase our truths and provide us with a monolithic narrative.

SHIFTING TO DECOLONIZATION Decolonization speaks to the fact that most, if not all, of our systems are derivatives of the ideals that the settlers carried over to this land when they seized it from the indigenous people who were here originally.

Decolonization allows space for an embrace of different people and cultures, while also acknowledging the complexities of these different people as well. With decolonization, people of color are given platforms within social justice movements without being forced to conform to language, beauty, and societal ideals set forth by powerful institution. Through decolonization we can hold institutions accountable for reinforcing racist, sexist, transphobic, classist ideals and truly implement the change that we seek.

UNSETTLING THE SETTLER’S WAYS Specifically addressing decolonization with respect to the LGBTQ* movement, it is time for us to be conscious of the thoughts we promote amongst our community. It is Queer People of Color who face the most hate violence, homelessness among other things, but still today one of the only conversations being had is concerning marriage. Are the lived experiences of people of color within the LGBTQ* community being highlighted? When we are pushing for our community members being represented in certain spaces, are we also addressing the policies and cultural norms that they are being forced to confine to? Are we calling out our community members for appropriating the culture of Queer People of Color while at the same time participating in the gentrification of their communities? Are we going to continue to support celebrities that claim to be allies to the LGBTQ* community but participate in the institutional and underlying racism in our society? It is one thing to be allowed into communities and cultures, but we must do so without assimilating into the norms set forth by the figurative Master’s in our society and leaving behind the people of color within and outside our community who have been just as critical to the progression of this movement others have.

Deidre Dumpson is the current Street Outreach Worker for the Pride Center. She graduated in 2015 with her BA in Women’s, Gender and Sexuality Studies, now she is in the process of getting her Master’s in the same field. Deidre has dedicated her life to intersectionality, racial justice, queer liberation, and all Black Feminist Radical

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EVENTS THINGS TO DO CONTESTS

LOOK

Loving Ourselves & Our Kids Do you have a child in your life who identifies as

—

lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans*, queer, or questioning, and want to connect with other adults for support?

LGBTQA+ and want to hangout with other youth like you?

DINING NIGHTLIFE DIRECTORY & MORE!

Every 3rd Thursday from 6-7pm!

Look for us on the Presbyterian Rainbow float at the Pride Parade

First United Presbyterian Church 1915 Fifth Ave., Troy 12180 Check out our website: www.unitedprestroy.org 10 AM Sunday Service

Dedicated to inclusiveness & social justice for the LGBTQ+ Community

Rainbow banner outside

Are you a young person (ages 10-18) who identifies as

Guide to the Capital Region

Every Bunny Saves! Drive In-to Summer Savings!

At the East Greenbush Community Library (10 Community Way, 12061)

Starts on Thursday, May 19

From 5:30—7 PM Gather for casual conversation at 5:30, followed by group discussion at 6pm. Snacks provided, along with a separate affirming, fun space for youth. A Collaboration Between:

CALL: 518.462.6138 EMAIL: INFO@CAPITALPRIDECENTER. ORG VISIT: WWW.CAPITALPRIDE CENTER.ORG

Traditional & Holistic Psychotherapies for Healing & Growth LGBTQ-Affirming Services Across the Lifespan

Lifestyle Photography is... Your Everyday, Your Important Moments, Your Once In A Lifetimes, Your Loved Ones. Lifestyle Photography for a Lifetime of Moments

Relationships & Couples Family & Parenting Issues Homestudies & Adoption Depression & Anxiety Addictions & Recovery Gender Wellness & Transitions Healing Trauma, Abuse, & Loss

518-438-2222 www.Facebook.com/ZhangPhotography www.JayZhangPhotography.com JZPhotographicServices@gmail.com 20 |

pridecenter OF THE CAPITAL REGION

523 Western Avenue, Suite 2A · Albany, NY 12203 info@choicesconsulting.com · www.choicesconsulting.com

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The Albany Gay Men’s Chorus Presents

GO FORWARD

Songs of Hope and Victory

SATURDAY, JUNE 18, 2016 • 7:30PM The College of Saint Rose, Massry Center for the Arts 1002 Madison Avenue, Albany, NY ADULTS $12 • STUDENTS $9 • UNDER 12 FREE Discounted advance tickets available at:

CAPITALPRIDECENTER.ORG ROMEO’S GIFTS - 299 LARK STREET • ALBANY * A portion of the proceeds will be donated to PAWS (Pets Are Wonderful Support)

The AGMC is an affiliate of The Pride Center of the Capital Region

LAW OFFICE OF GERI POMERANTZ, ESQ. Proudly serving the LGBT community and our friends

694 Columbia Turnpike East Greenbush, NY 12061 Tel: 518-479-3713 http://pomerantzlaw.org/ Practice focused on family and matrimonial law 22 |

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AGMC

Facing an Uncomfortable History by Alyssa Hackett If you’re an LGBTQ white person, as I am, I am looking for you to explore deep inside yourself, and challenge any current beliefs you may have about communities of color being solely responsible for the struggles they’ve face. There is part of my history I believe it’s time for me to own; my politics haven’t always been on the right side of humanity. This is something I’ve kept a secret from anyone new I meet, and topic I run from when face-to-face with someone past Alyssa had a conversation with. One of the comments I remember stating most frequently was a misinformed opinion about reparations. My logic followed that, as a nation, we were so far from the days of slavery that it made zero sense to give money away for mistakes that were made hundreds of years ago. To me, at the time, slavery was dead, the civil rights act had been passed, and racism was a relic left for the history books. Yes, I was one of those awesome white people that thought I had the ability to declare when racism was no longer a thing because, you know, what value could lived experience possibly have? If you’re an individual of color reading this, please know I am not looking for forgiveness or understanding – past Alyssa really didn’t do the work to deserve it. For me, forgiveness and understanding should be earned, and I am committed to spending the rest of my life doing the work required to earn the title of “Ally” to communities’ of color. If you’re an LGBTQ white person, as I am, I am looking for you to explore deep inside yourself, and challenge any current beliefs you may have about communities of color being solely responsible for the struggles they’ve face. I know this is a big ask, and I also know many of us are struggling to overcome the effects oppression has had on our lives. But what good does it do for the entirety

of our community if us white LGBTQ folks fail to recognize the research that shows the implications a white centered LGBTQ movement has had and how it has failed to truly address issues of social justice and equality beyond the right to marriage.

-1/3 (34%) of black transgender respondents reported having incomes of $10,000 or less, as did 28% of Latino respondents, 23% of both Native American and multiracial respondents, and 18% of API respondents

Marriage is irrelevant for those who fail to survive.

- All communities of color had higher poverty rates than their white counterparts. Of white people, 9.6% were in poverty in 2013 compared to 28.9% of Native Americans,15 27.2% of black people, 23.5% of Hispanic people, and 10.5% of Asian people.

If you are willing to do the work and are curious about where to start, consider engaging in meaningful dialog that explores the systemic contributions for the facts listed below. Take a moment and read about violence experienced by trans* women of color, look for LGBTQ scholars doing work to further societal acceptance and tell me how many of those scholars are people of color. Steps toward equality require representation in all systems capable of granting or denying basic human rights. Points for consideration and exploration: • Erasure of contributions people of color have made to LGBTQ political movements (Stonewall, anyone?) • According to research published by Harlem United… - Ninety-nine percent of new HIV diagnoses in New York City from 20072011 were among transgender women. - 51% of these women had documented substance use, and homelessness - Half of the 1.1 million people living with HIV/AIDS in the United States are black. - 90% of transgender women newly diagnosed with HIV in New York City were blacks/African Americans or Latinos. • According to research released in 2015 and presented in Paying an Unfair Price: The Financial Penalty for LGBT People of Color in America… - African American people in same-sex couples are more than twice as likely to live in poverty as African American people in married opposite-sex couples. - 1 in 4 older adults of color have reported discrimination in housing

The statics above are not easy to read; they are even more challenging to live. Recognizing our LGBTQ individuals of color face challenges white LGBTQ communities don’t, does not mean your experiences are invalid. This is not playing oppression bingo. If you are curious about the shift in my perspective, I strongly encourage you to reach out and engage me in conversation.

Yes, I was one of those awesome white people that thought I had the ability to declare when racism was no longer a thing because, you know, what value could lived experience possibly have? I am determined to do my best best to own past mistakes, to operate from a place of empathy and understanding rather than shame and guilt, and working to help others recognize that if one segment of our community is under attack, we all must answer their battle cries by showing up on the battle field where communities of color tell us we are needed most. I would like to ask you, my fellow white LGBTQ to consider doing the same. Alyssa Hackett is one of two Program’s Supervisors at the Pride Center in Albany. Alyssa has spent several years serving the LGBTQ community as an advocate, educator, and service provider. She is passionate about serving marginalized populations and incorporates a diverse set of skills and experiences when navigating complex situations and systems.”

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Members Aeon Nexus Albany Medical Center Albany.com/Mannix Marketing Alliance for Positive Health Aras Performance Group, Inc Bank of America/ Merrill Lynch BBL Hospitality Berkshire Bank Foundation Bomber's Burrito Bar Buenau's Opticians Canterbury Animal Hospital Capital District YMCA Casswood Insurance CDPHP Central Avenue BID Classy Body Art Connections Psychotherapy Consumer Optical Corey Jamison Consulting, LLC. Deb Best Practices Decrescente Deja Vu The Desmond Hotel & Conference Center DiCarlo's Ellis Medicine Empire Merchants North Experience and Creative Design, Ltd. Geri Pomerantz, Esq GP Fund Solutions LLC Homestead Funding HomoRadio Interim Healthcare James Leone State Farm Janet Stein / Arbonne International Jay Zhang Photography Joseph Roche, Accounting Journey United Church of Christ Key Bank

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LAX on Lark Lucas Confectionery and Wine Bar Mansion Inn Mark D. Witecki, CPA Mazzone Hospitality / Aperitivo Bistro McGeary's Mexican Radio Schenectady Montgomery County Office for Aging MVP Health Care New York Life Insurance Company Northeast Acura NYSUT Oh Bar Olde English Pub Omni Development Company Peck’s Arcade Price Chopper Supermarkets Rain Modern Chinese RBC Wealth Management Renaissance Albany Hotel River Street Men’s Club ROCKS Ronnie Mangione / Wealth Advisory Group Samaritan Hospital Scofield Access Solutions LLC Security Plumbing & Heating Supply Skylands Services, INC Spectrum 8 Theatre Sunrise Management and Consulting Sylvan Learning Center TD Bank The Grocery Tri City Rentals Turner Construction University at Albany Foundation Waterworks Pub Wells Fargo Wolff’s Biergarten, Schenectady

Ask Mark Your Tax Questions

Welcome to the DEAR MARK column where you can ask a tax question. Of course some questions cannot be answered to due to the limited space in this column or warrant more facts due to specific circumstances of the taxpayer. Answers that apply to specific taxpayers may not necessary apply to others. Changes in tax law and rules may affect answers given at any point. You can write Mark at Mark Witecki CPA CFP(R) CFE, 3701 State St, Schenectady, NY 12304 DEAR MARK, My uncle owned property in Asia which I have inherited. It is rental property. Do I have to report this on my tax return? I just got notified of this last December. I was also told that in this country, profit is measured by a formula for rental income regardless of the expenses. Is this how I do it on the US form? Signed, Confused DEAR CONFUSED You have to follow US rules and document all expenses. Unless the rental is one that involves mineral rights or other special situations, you must use actual expense and can depreciate the rental property with a tax basis of fair market value at date of death of your uncle. . You must also file an FBAR form in the US, retain an accountant in the Asian country to prepare that country’s federal and/or local returns, and report that amount in your US return. In addition to filing an FBAR there are other forms that may have to be filed with your return. Please contact me to discuss further. DEAR MARK, I moved from Vermont last year and got a W-2 from my employer that had both New York and Vermont wages listed. How do I handle that? Very Truly Yours, New Yorker Now

BY MARK WITECKI

DEAR NEW YORKER NOW, You would file as a part-time resident of both New York and Vermont and allocate income to each state, and if you have income from any other states you would also have to allocate that income. In case there is any income that was allocated to more than one state, there is state resident credit available. I would suggest retaining a professional to handle such a return. DEAR MARK, I am a musician, and I play the guitar. I am a freelancer and am considered an independent contractor. Can I deduct music lessons for the guitar? What about piano lessons? Maria DEAR MARIA, You are able to deduct costs that are related to and connected with your self -employment as a guitarist. That can include guitar lessons including travel to those lessons, as well as any cost of books, the guitar itself (through depreciation), instrument repair, etc. As for the piano lessons, how is that related to the guitar? One might make an argument that you are a musician, and many musicians play more than one instrument and that this expense is for expansion of your musical career. DEAR MARK, I have a masters in chemistry. I am a chemist for a local company and am taking classes to improve my skills and am working toward a PHD in Chemistry. Can I deduct the cost of tuition books supplies computers etc. Signed, Chemist DEAR CHEMIST, As long as you have already met the minimum requirements in your field as a chemist, you can deduct expenses that your employer requires or that maintain and/or improve your skill set. There is a tuition deduction/credit if your income is within a certain range, but you may also claim those expenses as itemized deductions subject to limits.

DEAR MARK,

I just purchased a large piece of land for the purpose of extracting large amounts of soil and rock to sell to contractors. How do I handle this on my taxes? Confused DEAR CONFUSED,

In addition to all the allowable expenses of running your business, you are entitled to something called depletion, which involves writing off part of the land cost to offset the revenues from the sale of the soil and rock, If it is cost effective, I would suggest retaining an engineer to do a survey and estimate of the rock and soil that might be contained in the land, and that can be used as a basis for the depletion expense each year. DEAR MARK, I am a drag queen and have quite the attitude. I earn some income and it is increasing. I purchased some old books on how to be nasty. Can I write those off my taxes? Nasty, DEAR NASTY, If the old books help you in your act and are connecting to your business you should be able to write them off. More facts from you would give you a more definite answer. Answers that apply to specific taxpayers may not necessary apply to others. Changes in tax law and rules may affect answers given at any point. You can write Mark at Mark Witecki CPA CFP(R) CFE, 3701 State St, Schenectady, NY 12304. Mark D. Witecki specializes in small businesses and professional individuals. Mr. Witecki has a B. S. in Accounting from S. U. N. Y. Albany and an M. S. in Accounting from Syracuse University. Mark D. Witecki is a Certified Public Accountant, CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER™ practitioner, Certified Fraud Examiner, Certified College Planning Specialist and is admitted to practice before the United States Tax Court. Certified Financial Planner Board of Standards Inc. owns the certification marks CFP® , CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER™ and federally registered CFP (with flame design) in the U.S., which it awards to individuals who successfully complete CFP Board’s initial and ongoing certification requirements. Mark’s office is located at 3701 State Street, Schenectady, New York

Tax Preparation commUNITY MAY-JUNE 2016

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Out in the Garden BY JUDITH FETTERLEY

Dirt and Divinity I am writing this at Easter time. It is still March, but it might as well be April or even early May of a coldish spring. The gardening season has started and so have the problems and the pleasures. In my enthusiasm for our winterless winter, which allowed me to walk outside in my neighborhood most days, I forgot how damaging the lack of snow cover can be for plants newly emerging in spring. The earth is so dry I can sift it through my hands like dust. Only the weeds are thriving, coming up first and fast and proliferating; the hellebores, usually so thick and vibrant, are mere wisps of drooping white. Without snow cover the chipmunks got most of my crocus bulbs. They left only the yellow ones. Perhaps the white and purple bulbs are tastier? Spring edging produces dry turf that weighs little, not the usual sodden heavy clods; at least I don’t have to worry about the men who pick up my sod for the town’s compost, they won’t hurt their backs this year. Without the soggy soil needed to nurture moved roots, I can’t divide and transplant as I usually do this time of year. But none of these challenges can dim the thrill of being out in the garden again. I have already met a new neighbor, gotten a compliment on the garden from a passerby, and fielded requests for help from Perennial Wisdom customers. And I have gotten my hands in the dirt. And I have seen the first daffodils. On Palm Sunday my 8 year old grand-niece asked me why we have eggs and rabbits at Easter. In age-appropriate language, I tried to explain that eggs were a symbol of rebirth

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and that the religious phenomenon of Easter was connected to the natural phenomenon of spring and both were experiences of rebirth. The egg looks dead until it begins to move and shake and crack and lo and behold a chick emerges. The tomb looks sealed but suddenly the stone begins to roll away and lo and behold a man emerges. The ground seems frozen in place, nothing happening, and then suddenly up shoots a snow drop or a crocus or a daffodil. My explanation seemed to satisfy her. I didn’t get too far with the rabbits, though, except to suggest they were symbols of fertility. Instead I told her stories of my conflict with the rabbit that lives under my deck and fills my garden with little herbivores. I do not believe in any literal resurrection or in any after-life as it is usually imagined. But I do believe we are often emotionally and spiritually dead and in want of resurrection. Jesus promised his followers life and I take the liberty of interpreting this to mean the fullness of life that comes from following his basic principles: compassion for all creatures no matter their condition, and attention to and reverence for our spiritual dimension. I call this the “dirt and divinity” approach, a willingness to participate in life’s manure while still recognizing life’s glory. As gardeners we have a unique opportunity for “resurrection” into the fullness of life. We are challenged to have compassion for the chipmunks who eat our bulbs, for the chickadees that peck holes in our siding, for the rabbits who swarm and chew our favorite plants, for the Japanese beetle that decimates the oakleaf hydrangea and

the emerald ash borer that decimates our forests. We experience compassion for our plants as we struggle to help them thrive in the face of droughts and floods and frosts and scalds. We are always knee deep in dirt, both literally and metaphorically. But while we are down in the dirt, spreading manure, we are also always reminded of miracles and never more so than in the spring, when that first crocus, even if only yellow, bursts out against the dark brown ground, when the rolled bloodroot leaves push up through the cedar bark mulch and begin to unfurl, when that first flush of green hits the seemingly dead trees. Despite the muscle aches and joint pains that increase with each year, despite the constant frustrations and failures, in spring I know that I will continue to garden in some form or another, even if it is only a geranium in a pot, as long as I draw breath, for it keeps me humble, teaches me compassion, and puts me in contact with divinity.

The gardening season has started and so have the problems and pleasures Judith Fetterley lives and gardens in Glenmont, New York. She also runs Perennial Wisdom, a garden design business for new and existing gardens. Reach Judith at fetterleyj@gmail.com

In Concert in Albany, NY For the first time in more than a decade!

MARSHA STEVENS-PINO Concert Saturday, May 21, 7:00 PM Worship Sunday, May 22, 10:00 AM Singer/Songwriter of Contemporary Christian music for the GLBT community Christian Century Magazine has said that Stevens became "conservative Christianity's worst nightmare - a Jesus-loving, Bible-believing, Godfearing lesbian Christian." www.balmministries.net

A Welcoming and Affirming Congregation

Emmanuel Baptist Church of Albany 275 State Street, Albany, NY Phone: 518-465-5161 www.emmanuelalbany.net emmanuelalbany@juno.com Rev. Kathy Donley, Pastor

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SAVE THE DATE A LOVELY EVENING IN SARATOGA THURSDAY JULY 28, 2016 6:00 PM – 9:00 PM FOOD STATIONS, HORS D’OEUVRES, SOFT DRINKS, CASH BAR

These Presbyterian Churches Welcome You Where you can find a place ~ come as you are!

Albany First Presbyterian State & Willett Streets www.firstpresalbany.org Sunday Worship 8:30 am & 10:45 am

Hudson First Presbyterian Church 369 Warren Street FirstPresHudson.org Sunday Worship 10:45 am

Spencertown St. Peter’s Presbyterian Church 5219 County Route 7 SaintPetersPC.org Sunday Worship 10:00 am

Albany Westminster Presbyterian 262 State Street www.WPCalbany.org Sunday Worship 10:00 am

Hudson Falls First Presbyterian Church 5 River Street www.fpchudsonfalls.org Sunday Worship 10:00 am

Stephentown Stephentown Federated Church 1513 Garfield Road StephentownFederatedChurch.org Sunday Worship 9:30 am

Amsterdam United Presbyterian Church 25 Church Street www.upchurch25.org Sunday Worship 9:30 am

Putnam Station Putnam United Presbyterian Church 365 County Route 2 518-547-8378 Sunday Worship 10:00 am

Stillwater Stillwater United Church 747 Hudson Avenue StillwaterUnitedChurch.org Sunday Worship 9:00 & 10:30 am

Colonie Roessleville Presbyterian Church Elmhurst and Central Avenue 518-459-2816 Sunday Worship 9:30 am

Rensselaer First Presbyterian Church 34 Broadway 518-463-0894 Sunday Worship 10:00 am

Troy (Lansingburgh) Cornerstone Community Church 570 3rd Avenue www.cornerstoneccl.org Sunday Worship 10:00 am

Delmar Delmar Presbyterian Church 585 Delaware Avenue www.delmarpres.org Sunday Worship 10:00 am

Rensselaerville Rensselaerville Presbyterian Church 1454 CR 351 rvillepres.org Sunday Worship 11:00 am (Summer Only)

Troy First United 1915 Fifth Avenue (downtown) www.UnitedPresTroy.org Sunday Worship 10:00 am

Glens Falls First Presbyterian Church 400 Glen Street

Saratoga Springs Presbyterian-New England Congregational 24 Circular Street www.pnecchurch.org Sunday Worship 10:45 am

Valatie First Presbyterian Church 3212 Church Street 518-758-9658 Sunday Worship 11:00 am

FPCgf.org

Sunday Worship 10:00 am Guilderland Hamilton Union Presbyterian Church 2291 Western Avenue

Scotia-Glenville Trinity Presbyterian Church 185 Swaggertown Rd. HamiltonUnionPresbyterianChurch.org www.ScotiaTrinity.org Sunday Worship 8:30 am & 10:00 am Sunday Worship 10:00 am | pridecenter OF THE CAPITAL REGION

West Charlton West Charlton United Presbyterian 1331 Sacandaga Road www.westcharltonUPC.org Sunday Worship 10:30 am

THE FASHIONABLE AND THE FRIVOLOUS He leaned unsteadily against a building as I made a wider berth between us. For some reason, all the crazies seemed to latch onto me when I passed, and my body instinctually shifted a little in the possible event of any unwanted engagement. It was too late. “Hey,” he said in a throaty voice. I kept walking, but he was not having it. “Hey!”

“Nah, nah… what ARE you? Are you black or white?”

k c a l B or

I stopped. I don’t know why. Maybe I was looking for a fight. Maybe I was seeking some connection. Maybe I was just a tired teenager with nothing left to lose. Whatever the reason, I paused on my way to the Central Square T stop, where I was going to hop on the Red Line that would take me back to Boston, and I contemplated the gentleman I had just passed. Back in the 90’s, Central Square was not the greatest location. I went there for the Pearl art supply store, but mostly it was just liquor stores and the occasional CVS. The street was littered with empty bottles of cheap alcohol and lipstick-stained cigarette butts. I never loitered long there, but his raspy voice held something that made me listen. Turning around, I hesitantly approached the man. A dirty coat hung from him like a saggy and sick second skin. Despite the lateness of the hour, he wore a pair of sunglasses. In one hand he held the requisite brown paper bag, from which poked the glass lips of his chosen redemption. His other hand held a smoldering cigarette. His dark skin showed creases around his mouth, exacerbated by the gauntness of his cheeks. I couldn’t guess at his age, but I knew it was well beyond mine. Despite a general belief that I am aloof and unapproachable, the fact remains that most of the time I will talk to anyone, at least once. No matter what they wear, no matter how they look, and, in this instance, no matter how they smell. It’s the simple acknowledgement of a fellow human being. As I moved closer to him,

BY ALAN BENNETT ILAGAN

Ahh, I thought, relaxing a bit. The race question, and a rather tricky one for the multiracial among us. (For the record, my father is from the Philippines, and my mother is from Hoosick Falls, and of German and English descent.) I answered him in the way that I answered everyone who asked whether I was Spanish or Greek or Mexican or Portuguese: “I’m American.” He grinned. “No. Are you black or white?” I repeated myself: “I’m American.” He shook his head slowly before saying quietly and definitively, “In this country, you’re either black or white.”

white there was a slight smile, and he wasted no time in getting to the most basic question any of us will ever be asked. “What are you?” he wondered, almost half to himself. “Excuse me?” I asked, not entirely sure what he said, much less meant. “What are you?” he said again, more slowly. How many times had I tried to determine that for myself? How many sleepless nights had I wasted ruminating on that exact puzzle? Here was a stranger, putting it out there, into the world, into the air, into my face, where I couldn’t ignore or pretend it away. “Umm, I’m a human being,” I stuttered. It wasn’t clear how he meant his question: was I male or female, was I gay or straight, was I real or just a hallucination?

While that wasn’t the end of our conversation (we actually had a decent discussion after this) that’s what I remember all these years later. It wasn’t so much an impasse as it was an understanding that every single person has their own backstory and beliefs. What’s black or white to one person is shaded in nuances of gray for someone else. It doesn’t make one person intrinsically right or wrong, it simply makes us different. The trick is in realizing that difference is not a bad thing.

“What are you?” he wondered, almost half to himself Alan Bennett Ilagan is a freelance writer and amateur photographer who resides in upstate New York with his husband Andy. He created the website www.ALANILAGAN. com, which contains a repository of his work, as well as a daily blog; the website recently celebrated its tenth anniversary online. He was the manager of the Romaine Brooks Gallery from 2008 to 2012. His writing has appeared in Instinct, xy magazine, Capitalmen, Q Northeast, the Windy City Times, and the Boston Phoenix. Notable artistic collaborations have been created with the likes of Steven Underhill, Paul Richmond, Dennis Dean, and Michael Breyette.

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Welcoming Congregations Join Us In Exploring Your Spiritual Side At One Of The Welcoming Congregations Below:

Community Congregational Church (UCC) www.clintonheightsucc.org

First Unitarian Universalist Society of www.albanyuu.org

Community Reformed Church of Colonie www.coloniereformed.org

First United Methodist Church www.gbgm-umc.org/schenectady

Congregation Agudat Achim (Conservative) www.agudatachim.org

First United Methodist Church, East Greenbush www.fumceg.org

Congregation B’nai Shalom (Reform) www.bnaishalom.albany.ny.us

First United Presbyterian Church www.unitedprestroy.org (518)272-2771

Congregation Berith Sholom (Reform) www.berithsholom.org

Friends Meeting (Quaker) (518) 436-8812

Congregation Beth Emeth (Reform) www.bethemethalbany.org

Presbyterian New England Congregational Church, Saratoga http://pnecchurch.org/

Congregation Gates of Heaven (Reform) www.cgoh.org Congregation Ohav Shalom (Conservative) www.ohavshalom.org Congregation Temple Sinai (Reform) www.templesinai-saratogasprings.org Delmar Presbyterian Church www.delmarpres.org Eastern Parkway United Methodist Church www.easternparkway.weebly. com

Good Shepherd Lutheran Church www.goodshepherdchurchloudonville.org Holy Trinity National www.NCCofA.org/holytrin. html Journey United www.journeyucc.com Saratoga Springs United www.saratogaspringsumc.org Saint Aelred’s Priory and Retreat House (National Catholic) staelredpriory@aol.com

St. George’s Episcopal Church www.stgeorgesschenectady. org

St. Andrews Episcopal Church www.standrewsalbany.org

Emmanuel Baptist Church www.emmanuelalbany.net

St. John’s Lutheran Church www.stjohnsalbany.org

First Church in Albany www.firstchurchinalbany.org

Temple Israel www.tialbany.org

First Congregational Church of Albany www.firstcongregationalalbany.org

Unitarian Universalist www.saratoga-uu.org

First Lutheran Church www.FirstLutheranAlbany. org

Unity Church in Albany www.unitychurchinalbany.org

First Presbyterian Church www.firstpresalbany.org

Woodstock Jewish Congregation (Reconstructionist) www.wjcshul.org

First Reformed Church www.1streformed.com First Unitarian Society of Schenectady www.fussonline.org

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pridecenter OF THE CAPITAL REGION

RESOURCES FOR WHITE PEOPLE Racial Justice Resources

for

White People

As white LGBTQ people living in a country that places greater value on our existence than that of LGBTQ people of color, it’s our responsibility to dismantle racism in both “mainstream” and LGBTQ communities. This means following the direction of POC leadership and not centering our own voices on topics of racism and racial justice. This means protesting from our position (as opposed to carrying signs like “We are Mike Brown” …because we are not). This means calling in and collecting other white folks who are causing intentional and unintentional harm. Here are some resources to learn more about how to do that work within our communities and within ourselves. Undoing Racism Farmers Immersion Soul Fire Farm, Petersburg, NY soulfirefarm.com 5-day on-farm training in regenerative farming and undoing racism for all levels. Showing Up for Racial Justice showingupforracialjustice.org Queer & Trans Committee; Local affiliates in Albany & Hudson 7 Things to Remember if You’re a White Person Dating a Person of Color everydayfeminism.com/2015/08/white-persondating-poc Racial Equity Tools racialequitytools.org Tools, research, tips, curricula, and ideas for people who want to increase their own understanding and to help those working towards justice at every level – in systems, organizations, communities, and the culture at large. Waking Up White debbyirving.com/the-book Book by Debby Irving 7 Reasons Why Reverse Racism Doesn’t Exist dailydot.com/opinion/reverse-racism-doesnt-exist People’s Institute for Survival and Beyond Pisab.org A national and international collective of anti-racist, multicultural community organizers and educators dedicated to building an effective movement for social transformation. Citizenship & Social Justice citizenshipandsocialjustice.com Curriculum for White Americans to Educate Themselves on Race and Racism–from Ferguson to Charleston.

HERE’S GUFFMAN

BY PATRICK WHITE

Inclusion in Capital Region Theatres Editors Note: Opinions expressed in CommUNITY Magazine are those of the authors and are not necessarily those of the Pride Center of the Capital Region, its Board, Staff or Volunteers.

Every Capital Region theatre company wants to do plays with multi-ethnic casts. Every one of them. The challenge is casting them. Where do you find and nurture a group of people interested in the theater but who don’t feel they have entry. How do we reach out to people, stoke their interest, build their confidence and, if necessary, foster a sense of discipline necessary to the craft? Someone who has been walking and talking it for the past couple of years, even to the extent of forming their own theatre company and creating a space in Watervliet to perform in is Jean-Remy Monnay. With this issue, it was time to check in with the founder and Artistic Director of Soul Rebel Performance Troupe to see what the state of inclusion in Capital Region theatres is.

What are you up to now? We’re doing “Wedding Secrets” by Joe Starzyk at The Arts Center of the Capital Region. It’s a play that’s been done in the area very successfully, but this time with Soul Rebel, it’s with a mixed cast. Usually when you go see a play or a movie, you see a white couple with a black butler, but we’ve got a black couple with a white butler and a mixed race couple getting married. There’s nothing controversial in the play. It’s not about race. There’s nothing in the play that points out that race is the problem. The interesting thing will be the reaction in the audience. If there is a problem, it will be someone in the audience who doesn’t like it. What has Soul Rebel produced at your home theatre in Watervliet? We’ve done four full productions- “I Just Stopped by to See the Man,” “Wedding Band,” “Fences” and “Slow Dance on the Killing Ground”. “Fences” was also done at The Egg.

Now, people in the area looking for Black or Latino actors can be heard saying it’s difficult to cast them, there’s a limited pool. Did you have any trouble casting these shows or “Wedding Band”? I did not have problems. I think there’s problems with timing and certain age ranges. I do a lot of pre-casting rather than regular auditions. It’s getting there. We’re not there yet where you can easily find the black person or Hispanic person when you need them. I definitely think that one of the reasons I formed Soul Rebel is bringing more minority actors to the local stage. I definitely think it’s more diverse than it was 2 years ago, 5 years ago. I get a lot of phone calls from people looking for people and I can find them. There are two people who are going to be at Capital Rep and one of them never performed before she worked with Soul Rebel. Sheila Miller’s done two shows with Soul Rebel, now she’s auditioning for Maggie (MancinelliCahill, Artistic Director) and she’s cast. It’s very exciting! Albany Civic Theatre did “Ain’t Misbehavin’” with an all-black cast. I was the first black actor to work with Curtain Call Theatre, and now they’ve done a number of projects with black actors (“Driving Miss Daisy,” “The Whipping Man,” “Good People”…). “Wedding Secrets” I didn’t precast, and all the leads are black. There are actors who are coming around, and I encourage them not just to stay with Soul Rebel, but you need to be out there because I’m not doing this just for Soul Rebel. I’m doing it to make theatre better in the Capital Region. It is getting better. What challenges do you see to including multi-ethnic casts or shows needing them? The black actors I’m working with,

they’re trying to be comfortable. It’s not their priority now. They’re getting it, they’re showing it, but it’s not a priority where they’ll drive an hour each way to Cambridge for rehearsal every night. They’re excited, they love to do it, but it takes a lot of education, working with them, not just as a director, holding hands. It takes a commitment to theater and your craft. You can’t just decide on Friday morning you want to go to the city when you’ve got a show Friday night. Things can happen. You can’t just skip rehearsal because you don’t feel like it. All of this I’m working with them on, their commitment to theater and it’s not their fault because they’re not regular actors and they don’t know. Even becoming theater goers, just going to see a play. Showing up at 8:20 when the show starts at 8 I don’t believe in CPT, “Colored People’s Time.” You have people waiting on you and depending on you. It takes time and we are not there yet. It’s definitely, definitely better. When I formed Soul Rebel I never thought I would be producing so many shows in our own theatre with mostly black casts. That’s something I never thought I would see five years ago. So, what’s next for Soul Rebel? We’ve got “Wedding Secrets” opening 5/20-5/29 at ACCR, “Eclipsed” by Danai Gurria in July which was just recently on Broadway and “Intimate Apparel” in August.

Patrick White is an actor, director and teacher who will be in “Clybourne Park” at SCP 5/6-5/15 and “Spring Awakening” at UAlbany with C-R Kids 5/20 & 5/21 and his Acting Class will have a Scene Night 5/10 at the Albany Barn. info@ actingclasswithpatrickwhite. comcom

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FOR MORE INFORMATION CONTACT: MIKE AT 518.434.4686 EXT. 2302

A PHOTOGRAPHY GROUP FOR HIV+ MEN!

experience • learn • create HIV+ men who have sex with men, explore the challenges of getting in and staying in health care through the creative process of photography. The Positive Images group will share useful information and learn helpful tools to stay healthy and link to care while expressing their point of view through the camera lens.

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pridecenter OF THE CAPITAL REGION

Michael Cooks and You Can Too

BY MICHAEL MEADE

I Went To a Garden Party A garden party is a casual, easy but elegant style of entertaining, wellsuited to an early summer afternoon or evening. You’ve worked hard to get your patio, porch or backyard ready for summer; it’s time to show it off! May and June offer a lot of occasions for an outdoor party: Memorial Day, Midsummer’s Eve and, of course, Pride Week. Guests particularly enjoy the unstructured feeling that such an event creates. You can serve an elaborate smorgasbord of dishes or build the menu around a central dish supported by complementary dishes that don’t overwhelm it. If you’re not planning to have your guests sit down at tables, don’t serve foods that need to be cut with a knife. Instead, choose finger food or precut bite-sized food. Remember your guests will already have a full plate of food, a napkin and a wineglass to juggle. Make a prep sheet for the meal, including all the shopping information, which day you will prepare the dish and what it will be served on. Check everything off as you go. An important point to keep in mind is that there is no “right” way for the table to look. It’s a matter of your own personal taste. Mixing and matching old and new, complementary -- not matching -- napkins and tablecloths, dishes and serving pieces will create a warm and informal atmosphere. As far as the menu is concerned, make it as easy on yourself as you can. Everything doesn’t have to be made from scratch. You can find a wide variety of breads, cheeses, salads, dips, pates and hors d’oeuvres at local stores. You can tie them all together and make the menu memorable with one really good casserole and a spectacular dessert. For the casserole, pick a tried-andtrue favorite, like lasagna, ratatouille

or shepherd’s pie, something that’s easy to put together and serve and that everyone will like. The crowning glory of your garden party table will be a Summer Pudding, a classic English dessert that’s almost unknown here in America. A Summer Pudding is a dome-shaped mold (you can use a mixing bowl) lined with slices of bread and filled with seasonal fruits, including raspberries, strawberries and blueberries. The juices from the fruit seep into the bread, turning the pudding a lovely deep red-and-purple color. It’s beautiful, festive and very impressive. And since very few of your guests will have seen one before, it’ll be a conversation piece as well.

Simmer Pudding 10 - 15 thin slices of firm-textured white bread, crusts removed 1/2 cup thawed frozen apple juice concentrate 2 cups raspberries 1 Tbs. fresh ginger, peeled and minced

The day before you plan to serve the pudding, line a 2 quart mixing bowl with plastic wrap. Line the plastic wrap with the white bread slices, trimming them so that the pieces fit together neatly, like a jigsaw puzzle. You can overlap them slightly; just make sure that there are no gaps. Save enough bread to cover the top of the pudding. In a saucepan, combine the apple juice concentrate and all the berries. Bring the mixture to a boil and cook until the strawberries begin to soften, about 1 minute. Turn off the heat immediately. In a small bowl, dissolve the gelatin into the water, then add the mixture to the berries and stir to combine. Spoon into the bread-lined bowl and cover completely with the remaining bread slices. Cover the top with plastic wrap and a round plate that fits snugly inside the bowl. Place a heavy can on the plate to weigh it down. Set the bowl on a plate to catch any juice that overflows and refrigerate it overnight. To serve, remove the pudding from the refrigerator and remove the plastic wrap. Carefully turn the pudding out onto a platter, remove the bowl and the plastic wrap. Serve in slices with whipped cream on top. Note: There’s always a chance that the dammed thing will fall apart when you try to unmold it. If that happens, don’t feel bad; just serve it in small bowls with the whipped cream. It’ll still be delicious.

1&1/2 cups red currants (or 1/4 cup red currant jelly) 2 cups strawberries, hulled and quartered 2 cups blueberries 1 teaspoon powdered gelatin 1/8 cup cold water 1 cup heavy cream, whipped

Michael Meade graduated from the Culinary Institute of America in Hyde Park, New York, worked at Jack’s Oyster House in Albany and is currently sous-chef at Thunder Mountain Curry in Troy. Questions & comments are welcome at Michaelmeade1215@yahoo.com

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WEEKLY events SUNDAYS

TUESDAYS

WEDNESDAYS

EVERY SUNDAY OF THE MONTH

FIRST TUESDAY OF THE MONTH

FIRST WEDNESDAY OF THE MONTH

LGBTQ Alcoholics Anonymous†** 7:00–8:30 PM in the Garden Level SECOND SUNDAY OF THE MONTH

Saratoga LGBTQA Youth Group (ages 18 & under) 4:30–6:00 PM Saratoga Springs Library, Susman Room 49 Henry St., Saratoga Springs

Vintage Pride Appy Hour - Sober Social (ages 55+ & friends of all ages) 4:30–6:00 PM on the 1st Floor

LGBTQ Support Group 3:00–4:30 PM 125 High Rock Ave, Saratoga Springs

Trans* Pride Discussion Group 7:00–9:00 PM on the 1st Floor

SECOND WEDNESDAY OF THE MONTH

SECOND TUESDAY OF THE MONTH THIRD SUNDAY OF THE MONTH

Vintage Pride Potluck (ages 55+ & friends of all ages) 1:00–3:00 PM First Presbyterian Church, 362 State St., Albany LAST SUNDAY OF THE MONTH

Supper Sunday 5:00–9:00 PM on the 1st Floor

MONDAYS EVERY MONDAY OF THE MONTH

Men’s Pride 7:00–8:30 PM 1st, 3rd & 5th Mondays – Discussion 2nd & 4th Mondays – Social in the Garden Level

T-Talk: Trans* & Gender Non-Confroming Youth Group (ages 18 & under) 6:00–8:00 PM on the 1st Floor Capital Region Support Group for Family & Friends of LGBTQ People 7:00 PM First Unitarian Society of Schenectady 1221 Wendel Ave., Schenectady More info: Deborah Kenyon, deborahkenyon2@gmail.com 518-584-4774 (C), 518-695-4117 (H)

THIRD TUESDAY OF THE MONTH

Saratoga LGBTQA Youth Group (ages 18 & under) 4:30–6:00 PM Saratoga Springs Library, Susman Room 49 Henry St., Saratoga Springs Trans* Pride Meet & Greet 7:00–9:00 PM on the 1st Floor FOURTH TUESDAY OF THE MONTH

T-Talk: Trans & Gender Non-Confroming Youth Group (ages 18 & under) 6:00–8:00 PM on the 1st Floor *

†Anonymous meetings held at the Pride Center are non-affiliated, independent groups **indicates an outside group that meets at the Pride Center

Except where noted all events take place at The Pride Center, 332 Hudson Ave, Albany, NY 12210 (518) 462-6138 | www.capitalpridecenter.org

Women’s Pride 6:00–8:00 PM: discussion on the 1st Floor FOURTH WEDNESDAY OF THE MONTH

Women’s Pride 6:00–8:00 PM: discussion on the 1st Floor

THURSDAYS EVERY THURSDAY OF THE MONTH

Schenectady LGBTQA Youth Group (ages 18 & under) 6:00–7:30 PM Proctor’s Theater, Underground Space 432 State St., Schenectady LGBTQ Narcotics Anonymous†** 7:30–8:30 PM in the Garden Level

FRIDAYS EVERY FRIDAY OF THE MONTH

Drop-in Rapid HIV Testing 10:00 AM–8:30 PM walk in Appointments also available by calling (518) 462-6138

AYO! Youth Drop in Space (ages 18 & under) 3:00–9:00 PM on 1st Floor & in the Garden Level (Garden Level only on 1st Fridays) Albany LGBTQA Youth Group (ages 18 & under) 7:00–8:30 PM in the Garden Level FIRST FRIDAY ALBANY

Special Artist Reception and Opening in the Romaine Brooks Gallery 5:00–9:00 PM on the 1st Floor Check out the artists at www.capitalpridecenter.org/RBG

The Garden Level is wheelchair accessible. Enter from the street through the door beneath the front steps. 34 |

pridecenter OF THE CAPITAL REGION

SPECIAL events MAY THURSDAY, MAY 12 - MAY, MAY 31

Pride Celebration Official Pride Center Events Various Times Various Locations

This year’s extended Pride Celebration features fabulous events, including official Pride Center events celebrating the men, women, transgender and gender non-confroming individuals, families, talent and leadership found in our community. Cornerstone events such as the Pride Kick-off Celebration (May 22) and Alternative Prom (May 27) return alongside exciting new events. Find details on all of May’s Official Pride Center as well as other Pride Celebration events at www.capitalpridecenter.org . (Please note that the majority of regular Pride Center programming will continue in May, with some standing group meetings being augmented by a special event.) THURSDAY, MAY 26

Capital PRIDE Volunteer Session 6:30-8:30 PM The Pride Center, 332 Hudson Ave, Albany

100 Volunteers are needed to assist on Saturday May 11th. Visit www.capitalpridecenter.org/PRIDE to find out more and sign up in advance; then join us on May 26th at this important session to get the tools and tips you need to have a fantastic experience . All Pride volunteers are asked to attend.

JUNE

AFFILIATE events The AGMC presents: “Going Forward: Songs of Hope and Victory” Saturday, June 18, 2016 at 7:30pm at the Picotte Recital Hall, College of St. Rose, 1002 Madison Avenue, Albany. Tickets are available in advance from www.capitalpridecenter.org and at Romeo’s on Lark Street. Movie Night Second Tuesday of Each Month We will begin at 5 PM at Harvey’s Pub, 14 Phila Street Saratoga Springs. From there, we can decide who wants to see what movies and leave accordingly for Bowtie Cinemas. Lesbian Networking Breakfast We meet on the third Thursday of each month, at the Country Corner Café on Church Street in the upstairs dining room at 7:30 AM. Latecomers are welcome.

Monthly LGBTQ Support Group Second Sunday of the Month 3:00 – 4:30 PM 125 High Rock Ave, Saratoga Springs Contact Caroline with questions: 518.857.9361 sponsored by Saratoga Pride & the Pride Center of the Capital Region.

WEDNESDAY, JUNE 1 - JUNE 11

Pride Celebration Official Pride Center Events Various Times Various Locations

The Pride Celebration continues and grows in June. Don’t miss more great official Pride Center Events celebrating our older adults, unity, and important work to be done in and for our community. Plan now for Cornerstone events when the Pride Center of the Capital Region & TD Bank Present PRIDE 5K & RAINBOW FUN RUN (June 5) and the highlight of it all The 2016 Capital PRIDE arade sponsored by Planned Parenthood Mohawk Hudson and the 2016 Capital PRIDE Festival (both on June 11). Find details on all of the June’s Official Pride Center as well as other Pride Celebration events at www.capitalpridecenter.org .

JULY THURSDAY, JULY 28

Saratoga Summer Soiree 6:00-9:00 PM Location TBA

Save the Date for this lovely evening in Saratoga to support the important work of the Pride Center of the Capital Region. commUNITY MAY-JUNE 2016

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CommUNITY calendar SPORTS/ FUN & GAMES Albany All-Stars Roller Derby Saturday, May 14, Doors at 5PM Washington Avenue Armory, 195 Washington Ave., Albany Come watch CDMRD’s Capital District Trauma Authority take on TMRD’s Toronto Outrage at 6:00 pm. Then, at 8:00 pm, AASRD’s Brawl Stars go up against LDDS’s TitleTown KnockOuts. The Brawl Stars have won all 3 of their games so far this season, and this will be their last home game, so you don’t want to miss it! Gay Skate Tuesdays, 7–9:30 PM Rollarama Skating Center, 2710 Hamburg St., Schenectady An open skate for the LGBTQ Community! $9.50 w. Skate Rental/$6.50 w. your own skates. For more info contact David at DB40@aol. com or (518) 573-3962 Geek and Gaymer Night Thursdays, 9 PM Rocks, 77 Central Ave., Albany (518) 472-3588 Capital Area Pride Bowlers Sportsman Bowling Lanes 1652 Crane St., Schenectady. Open to all.More info: Dimas (518) 894-1083

KARAOKE Waterworks Pub Mondays, 10 PM–2 AM 76 Central Ave., Albany, (518) 465-9079 No Cover. (18+)

Oh Bar Thursdays, 10 PM–1 AM 304 Lark St., Albany, (518) 463-9004 No Cover. (21+) Waterworks Pub Fridays, 10 PM 76 Central Ave., Albany, (518) 465-9079 18+ (w. cover) ROCKS Fridays, 9 PM–12 AM 77 Central Ave., Albany, (518) 472-3588 36 |

pridecenter OF THE CAPITAL REGION

Circus Cafe Saturdays, 10 PM–2 AM 392 Broadway, Saratoga, (518) 5831106

YouthPride! 1st Friday of the month, 6–9 PM Professor Java’s Coffee Sanctuary 217 Wolf Rd., Colonie

(21+)

A student led meeting that centers around helping LGBTQ students and allied students discuss matters in our community, schools, and in their Gay Straight Alliances (GSAs) that they have in their schools. Youth-Pride provides leadership development and an opportunity to help plan activities around GLSEN’s Days of Action and Days of Support.

Center Square Pub Saturdays, 10 PM–2 AM 32 Dove St., Albany, (518) 729-2880 No Cover.

OPEN MIC/ LITERARY Open Minded Mic & Talent Showcase (for all performers) Every 1st & 3rd Thursday Sign up 8:30 PM, Start 9:00 PM Rocks, 77 Central Ave., Albany (518) 472-3588 Variety Open Mic Sundays, 10:00 PM–12:00 AM Waterworks Pub, 76 Central Ave., Albany (518) 465-9079

SOCIAL/SUPPORT GROUPS LGBT Support Group Thursdays, 3-4 PM Albany VA Medical Center, Behavioral Health Clinic, 10th Floor A Wing, Conference Room A1033 (518) 626-5395 All LGBTQ identified Veterans are welcome. Out of the Closet I Am (for women who have sex with women) 1st & 3rd Wednesdays, 6:30–8 PM In Our Own Voices, 245 Lark St., Albany, (518) 432-4188 Men’s Empowerment Group 1st & 3rd Thursdays, 6–7:30 PM In Our Own Voices, 245 Lark St., Albany, (518) 432-4188 Voices of Unity (for Transgender people of color) 2nd & 4th Wednesdays, 6–7:30 PM In Our Own Voices, 245 Lark St., Albany, (518) 432-4188

TRIVIA Live Trivia with FriedaTuesdays, 8–10 PM ROCKS, 77 Central Ave., Albany (518) 472-3588

SPECIAL COMMUNITY EVENTS Say It Loud! Black and Latino Gay Pride Meetings Thursdays in May, 6:00 PM In Our Own Voices, 245 Lark St., Albany, (518) 432-4188 Get involved in the 10th annual Say It Loud celebration! All are welcome. Queer Queens of Comedy Tuesday, June 7, Showtime - 7 PM FunnyBone Comedy Club and Restaurant, 1 CrossGates Mall Rd., Albany, NY, 12203 (518) 313-7484 Featuring Poppy Champlin, Karen WIlliams, and Jaye McBride. Tickets: http://albany.funnybone.com/ $25 (General Admission), $40 (VIP).

Send the details of your event and a brief description to sminchin@ capitalpridecenter. org at least 6 weeks before your event. *event listings may be edited for space and content.

advertiser INDEX Memorial Day “Sweet 16“ Weekend Celebration Friday, May 27 - Monday, May 30 Easton Mountain, 391 Herrington Hill Road, Greenwich, NY 12834 (518) 692-8023 or 800-553-8235 This year Easton Mountain celebrates her “Sweet 16”! You’re invited to join us in making this special anniversary a weekend to remember. We will commemorate many of the wonderful people, stories, traditions, and accomplishments the Easton community has experienced over the past 16 years. Expect to relax, have fun, and laugh much with friends old and new.

Albany Gay Men’s Chorus..................................................22

Your weekend will feature entertainment, parties, dances, and delicious home-cooked meals. There will be a variety of engaging workshops drawn from some of our most popular camps. Where else but at Easton Mountain can you select programming options ranging from a morning yoga session to a nature hike to a facilitated massage exchange to a period of mindful meditation to a workshop on erotic spirituality? Throughout this weekend you will have many opportunities to renew body, mind, and spirit in the tranquil setting of Easton Mountain Retreat Center. Make this Memorial Day weekend your well-deserved getaway and enjoy the healing presence of nature, community, and spirit.

First United Presbyterian Church......................................20

Your presence at this special anniversary event supports Easton Mountain and shows your commitment to our mission to create positive change in the world. Help us celebrate and give thanks for the first 16 years, and join us as we begin to envision our bright future together! Rates and Registration: www. eastonmountain.org/sweetsixteen/

Albany.com.......................................................................... 20 Bakkerij Krijnen................................................................... 22 Cafe Hollywood.....................................................................8 Capital Pride Singers.............................................................8 Choices Counseling & Consulting.....................................20 Emmanuel Baptist Church of Albany................................27 Falvey Real Estate, Craig LeClaire.......................................8 HomoRadio......................................................................... 26 In Our Own Voices......................................................21, 35 Jay Zhang Photography.....................................................20 Joseph Roche, Accountant................................................24 Law Office of Geri Pomerantz..........................................22 Mark Witecki, CPA, CFP.................................................... 25 Mary Kay Cosmetics ..........................................................20 New York State Department of Health..................9,13,15 Presbyterian Rainbow........................................................28 Project Hope....................................................................... 32 Queer Engineer................................................................... 18 Riverstone Consulting.......................................................... 9 Saratoga Pride.................................................................... 18 Security Supply/Bath Expressions Showroom...................9 Spectrum 8 Theatres..........................................................32 Tri City Rentals.................................................................. 40 Welcoming Congregations................................................30

In 2015, 20,000 copies of CommUNITY Magazine were distributed to public locations throughout the region and 60,000 copies were delivered directly to our subscribers

For more information contact Steven @ (518) 462-6138 or sminchin@capitalpridecenter.org commUNITY MAY-JUNE 2016

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pride center PROGRAMS & SERVICES

Your Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Queer Community Center since 1970

Community Empowerment

Training & Education Services

Engaging the community to build and sustain safe and empowering spaces through social connection, resource sharing, and advocacy. Trans* Pride, Women’s Pride, and Men’s Pride organize peer led support groups and social events that celebrate and address the needs of each unique identity. Rainbow Café also provides a fun and welcoming space for the entire community with monthly events like Movie Nights and Supper Sunday.

Comprehensive and customized trainings, presentations, and technical assistance for healthcare providers, K-12 schools, colleges, businesses, organizations, and any group seeking to enhance environments and services for LGBTQ individuals.

Vintage Pride Connecting older LGBTQ adults to each other and the broader community with social gatherings, educational opportunities, and special events. Creating new memories while celebrating and honoring their resilience and contributions to our community.

Center Families Helping LGBTQ headed families in the Capital Region achieve their goals of building and sustaining healthy and happy families by engaging parents and children in the planning process of monthly social events and educational opportunities.

Center Arts

Business Alliance Business Alliance members gain exclusive visibility, ways to leverage customer allegiance & access to a dedicated consumer base. Monthly Mixers to meet up with friends, distribute business cards, and make important business contacts.

Capital PRIDE As the producer of the largest annual Capital Pride celebration in Upstate NY, the Pride Center brings a record breaking 30,000 festival and parade attendees, and 35,000 people celebrating throughout PRIDE week each year.

CommUNITY Magazine The Pride Center’s bi-monthly publication highlights & informs the larger Capital Region on local LGBTQ news and events as well as supports other LGBTQ organizations. We reach over 3,000 avid readers per month.

Our Romaine Brooks Gallery spotlights the work of LGBTQ artists/themed works while engaging with the surrounding local community by participating in Albany’s 1st Friday showings at the Pride Center.

Center Youth

BUILDING pride

ENGAGING community EMPOWERING lives

38 |

pridecenter OF THE CAPITAL REGION

Support, outreach, & advocacy for LGBTQA youth ages 18 and under. Programs include regional groups, Albany Youth Organizing! Drop-In Space, HIV testing, the Center Youth Action Team, GSA support, and annual events.

THE PRIDE CENTER’S SERVICE AREA

Albany, Schenectady, Rensselaer, Saratoga, Warren, Washington, Columbia, Greene, Fulton, and Montgomery counties

Official

events

thurSday, may 12

Sunday, may 15

tueSday, may 17

life after “gay” MarRiage

Revel pride dance paRty

trans* pRide faMily dinner

4 -8 pm franKlin plaza fourth & grand St. | troy $50 - $150

6:30 – 9:30 pm the pride center 332 hudSon ave. | albany $10 in advance, $12 at the door

ticKetS & vip pacKageS at www.capitalpridecenter.org

reServe your Space at the table: www.capitalpridecenter.org

explOring the state Of lgBtQ comMunities in the capital region 6 -8 pm the linda: wamc’S performing artS center | 339 central ave. albany | free co-produced with

preSented by

Saturday, may 21

Sunday, may 22

monday, may 23

fRieda & carmie’S caBaret fOr kids

pride Kick-Off celeBration

capital RegiOn Variety Show

2-5 pm waShington parK laKehouSe waShington parK | madiSon ave albany | free ($5 SuggeSted donation)

6 - 11 pm rocKS 77 central ave. | albany $5 in advance, $7 at the door

2-4 pm the huxley theater nyS muSeum | 260 madiSon ave albany | free

co-produced with

wedneSday, may 25

paint & Sip fundRaiSer fOr WOMen’S pRide

friday, may 27

Sunday, may 29

alteRnatiVe prOM!

supper Sunday special pride BBQ

limited Seating, regiSter today: www.capitalpridecenter.org

7-11 pm daniel p. nolan gymnaSium college of Saint roSe 420 weStern ave. | albany $20 caSh at door, $18 online or at door w/ 3-5 travel-Sized toiletrieS

tueSday, may 31

wedneSday, June 1

highlighting the leadeRShip Of lgBt cOMmunitieS of coloR

flag raising cereMOny

7 - 9 pm Saratoga paint n Sip Studio 584 new loudon road | latham $35

5 – 7 pm albany city hall 24 eagle St. | albany | free!

co-produced with

thurSday, June 2

soBeR dance 7 – 11 pm firSt unitarian univerSaliSt Society of albany 405 waShington ave. | albany free co-produced with

buy your ticKetS at www.capitalpridecenter.org

tba | albany city hall 24 eagle St. | albany | free!

co-produced with

friday, June 3

pride shOW + daRk hOllow Rd fire peRfOrmeRS 5 - 9 pm romaine brooKS gallery | the pride center 332 hudSon ave. | albany free!

5 – 9 pm the pride center 332 hudSon ave. | albany donationS welcome

wedneSday, June 1

unity mixeR 5:30-8:30 pm oh bar | 304 larK St. albany | caSh bar tipS donated | 21+ w. id co-produced with

Sunday, June 5 the pride center of the capital RegiOn & td Bank preSent

pride 5K & rainBOW fun run

8-11am corning preServe boat launch | albany $25 in advance, $30 day of race regiSter at www.capitalpridecenter.org preSented by

tueSday, June 7

thurSday, June 9

Saturday, June 11

vintage pride’S WhateveR flOatS your BOat paRty

comMunity gear up!

5:30 – 9 pm dutch apple cruiSeS 141 broadway | albany $40

7 - 9 pm the pride center 332 hudSon ave. | albany free!

capital pride paRade & feStival

buy your ticKetS at www.capitalpridecenter.org

noon – 5 pm larK St. & waShington parK albany | free!

NON-PROFIT US POSTAGE

PAID

PERMIT #798 ALBANY, NY

332 Hudson Avenue Albany, NY 12210

BUILDING pride

ENGAGING community EMPOWERING lives

Distinguished Living...Successful Living...Gay Living Tri City Rentals is a Proud Supporter of the LGBT Community

Visit one of our 24 Fine Capital District Apartment Communities

www.TriCityRentals.com 40 |

pridecenter OF THE CAPITAL REGION

518.862.6600