I Slept with Potiphar's Wife by Life Network

I Slept with Potipharâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Wife

Bobby Sutton

I SLEPT WITH POTIPHAR'S WIFE

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Doctrine is truth lifted from Scripture and dedicated to purpose.â&#x20AC;?

Published by Truth, Liberty and Freedom Press (T.L.F.P.). PO. Box 72 Sulphur, KY 40070 Printed in the United States of America

Books by Dr. Bernie L. Wade Does God Have a Name? Baptism According to Matthew 28:19 The Next Wave – Restoration of the Charismata I Was the Ugly Duckling History of Apostolic Reformation The Biblical Marriage Manual How to Be a Christian Without Going to Church IS CHRISTMASs CHRISTIAN? The Israel of God - A Destiny Enjoyed History of the Apostolic Faith Church of God The Original Pentecostal Assemblies of the World

Books by Other Authors I AM – By Dr. John Roberts CHURCH GOVERNMENT – By Dr. Barney Phillips The Church – Dr. Robert Straube Foundational Discipling Principles – Dr. Robert Straub

Table of Contents Foreward ................................................................................................................ Page 7 Chapter 1 - Potiphar's Wife ................................................................................... Page 8 Chapter 2 - Conversion .......................................................................................... Page 9 Chapter 3 - Stumbling ............................................................................................. Page 10 Chapter 4 - Where Are You Now? ........................................................................ Page 11 Chapter 5 - Same Question ..................................................................................... Page 12 Chapter 6 - Thou Art the Man! .............................................................................. Page 13 Chapter 7 - No Excuses .......................................................................................... Page 14 Chapter 8 - Restoration ........................................................................................... Page 15 Chapter 9 - Message to Cave Dwellers .................................................................. Page 16 Chapter 10 - Blinded by the Light .......................................................................... Page 18 Chapter 11 - Doctor My Eyes ................................................................................ Page 21 Chapter 12 - One Touch of His Hand .................................................................... Page 23 Chapter 13 - Water in a Dry Place ......................................................................... Page 26 Chapter 14 - Comfort in Hebrews 6 ....................................................................... Page 28 Chapter 15 - Spring up O Well ............................................................................... Page 30 Chapter 16 - Remember Ye Not the Former Things .............................................. Page 32 Chapter 17 - Take Ye Away the Stone .................................................................. Page 34 Chapter 18 - The Proving Trail .............................................................................. Page 37 Chapter 19 - Love One Another ............................................................................ Page 39 Chapter 20 - Back in the Battle ............................................................................. Page 41

FOREWARD The idea of a "forward" is to bring attention to the book, the subject, author, etc. As I read this book which is a story of one family or one minister's challenges to live for Christ, battle the flesh and overcome. I realized that in the end, "FOREWARD" is what we all must do. The Mantra of the Overcomer is "I Shall Yet Praise Him!" Regardless of the circumstance, the obstacle, the inconvenience or the challenge we must go FOREWARD. Our home is not in this world only but in Christ Jesus! While we know that we 'wrestle not with flesh and blood' the reality is that what we always see with our carnal eye is just that, 'flesh and blood'. It is easier to wrestle with flesh and blood than it is to let the Lord fight our battles. It is not the manifestation of Satan that troubles the believer, but rather it is the works of the flesh that are our constant vigil. Ministers who fall into the snares of the devil too often are abandoned or forgotten. Organizations are quick to forget or ignore their responsibility to restore their fallen brethren. This has got to be rectified. I told the ministers when we reorganized our ministry in 2001 that we had to be different. We had to get beyond being an army that killed its own wounded; and so we have and so we must continue. Bobby Sutton is one of those wounded on the battle field. We might even say he was wounded by 'friendly fire' but whatever the case God has brought him through. In His Grace. Bernie L. Wade, Thd. President International Circle of Faith (ICOF)

http://www.icof.net

Chapter 1 Potipharâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Wife Gen 39:11-12 And it came to pass about this time, that Joseph went into the house to do his business; and there was none of the men of the house there within. And she caught him by his garment, saying, Lie with me: and he left his garment in her hand and fled, and got him out. (KJV) The well known story of Joseph, if you have been a Christian for any time at all, if you have been in any Bible studies, you have heard the story of Joseph. Joseph is a lesson in character, faith, Godâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s providence and many other Christian principles and themes. In bible typology he is a type of Jesus Christ. He had his own death, burial and resurrection. He forgave those that despitefully used him and brought them into his kingdom. When as a young man Joseph was tried by the beautiful wife of Potiphar he prevailed, fled and maintained his relationship with God. I did not. When I met the temptation I did not flee and I did not maintain my relationship with God. This is my story and maybe your story also.

Chapter 2 Conversion

Baton Rouge Louisiana summer 1974. A group of long haired pot smoking hippies walk into the First United Pentecostal Church at the invitation of a mutual friend. The church folks were wondering what God was up to and the hippies were wondering where God was. In the next six months to a year the conversions happened and the “hippies” were now transformed into street preachers with no fear of anything but sin and missing the rapture. Everybody in the group went into a ministry of some kind. My family and I went into evangelism and then the foreign missions field as ordained missionaries with the United Pentecostal Church International. Our first appointment was to the country of Indonesia. After a year we went to the Philippines where we served as vice president of the United Pentecostal Bible College in Manila. After three years on the field we returned to the States because our daughter developed a skin disease from exposure to a tropical climate. The next stop was Home missions in New Bedford Massachusetts. This information is to show you the extent of the ministry in which we were involved. I built one church and was the pastor of two other churches. I had a successful ministry and a successful Sunday morning radio broadcast. I did not pastor a mega church, at its peak the church I led grew to around 300. This number may be large to some, and to others, the size of one of their Sunday school classes. The point being that I had a ministry of over 20 years. Respected by my peers and settled into a comfortable lifestyle provided by the blessings of God. I wasn’t a novice. I wasn’t a fly by night preacher. I was established.

Chapter 3 Stumbling

I have read books on how not to stumble written by men that did not stumble. I have taught young ministers on the dangers and pitfalls of the ministry before I stumbled. This book comes from one that stumbled. Actually fell down and almost was destroyed. Joseph ran. I did not. Joseph persevered. I did not. Joseph maintained. I did not. I dishonored God, myself, my family, and my church. I hurt people. I gave people a reason to scoff at the church and everything it stood for. I caused trouble for families that loved me and gave ammunition to the ones that disliked me. I was in a city for four years where I established a church and came back after five years to pastor the same church. In an instant I destroyed the reputation I and the church had been so careful to build. I gave stories, tales and speculation to all that wanted to pontificate the fall. This book comes from one that knows the art of stumbling and stumbling well. If you are reading this book and have not stumbled, donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t. It really isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t worth it. I do not expect you to believe me because you have not gone down the trail. If you are reading this book and have been down the stumbling trail then you know what I am talking about and probable still feel the bruises. You are who I am talking to. Pay attention!

Chapter 4 Where Are You Now? The point is not how, when, who with, and where. The point is Where are you now? Let me take a moment here and explain that my incident took place almost ten years ago. I was married for twenty eight years when the affair took place. My wife and I tried to work through the fallout for eight years and finally were divorced and at the writing of this book I have been divorced for a year and remarried for four months. I have three wonderful children from my first marriage and we have a great relationship. I am currently living in Hawaii and work on the ministerial staff with my son who is the senior pastor of Legacy Church. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m sure that raises some eyebrows (especially in conservative Pentecostal circles) because even though we preach forgiveness of sins it only applies to the congregation not to the preachers. My ex-wife lives in Louisiana and she has a great relationship with our children. I wish her the blessings of the Lord and happiness. She is a great person and has given herself to the work of the Lord. Sometimes the damage we do to one another is too terrible to overcome.

Chapter 5 Same Question At the beginning of chapter four I ask you a question “Where are you now”. You need to look around and find out where you are spiritually, mentally and physically. Find yourself. You were in a ministry. You were an Apostle, Prophet, Pastor, Evangelist, or Teacher. You served the Lord. You went to the foreign field and gave a portion of your life to another nation. You and your family struggled to bring up a church. You and your family sacrificed to help others. You gave yourself, your time, your energy. You were always on call. You never put yourself first. You were Christ like and Christ’s vessel to a lost city, country, even the world. Again where are you now? What are you doing with the gifts? What are you doing with the ministry God gave you? Where are you hiding? What cave did you crawl into? Sometimes the idea of a cave still appeals to me. The ghosts of failure do come back but not as often as they use to. The song says “When the darkness comes and no ones around I’m still hunted by the same old hounds”. I know how you feel brother, but there really is help in the Lord.

Chapter 6 Thou art the Man! We know the story. David sat listening to the prophet tell the account of the rich man taking the poor man’s lamb and using it for his banquet instead of one of his own. What! How could he! He should pay! In the middle of David’s outrage and plans for the punishment of this creature. Nathan points the finger and declares “Thou art the man”. Can you imagine the crushing……..Oh sure you can. Not only imagine but truly can say I know what that is like. When the curtain is ripped off of the sin and exposure takes place. Humiliation, sadness, anger, rage, self pity, the list of emotions can go on and on. In the midst of it all there is a desire to make things right. There is a desire to run and hide. There is a desire to end it all. There is a desire that somehow it will all go away. Well it did not go away and as the great western writer Louis L’Amour said through many of his characters “You wrote the song, now dance”. It was not fun dancing to the tune I wrote neither was it for my family, the family of the ones involved and certainly not for the church that I led. Thank God for friends, for family and for people that helped us through the blast and the immediate fallout that occurred. To quote the comic strip character Pogo “We have met the enemy and he is us”. If you have spent time blaming every one else for your sin it is time to meet the enemy. David said II Samuel 12:13 And David said to Nathan, I have sinned against the Lord. And Nathan said unto David, The Lord also hath put away thy sin: thou shalt not die.

I have sinned.

Chapter 7 No excuses James 1:14-15 But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust and enticed. Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death. David did not die when he sinned but some things died. The child that he bore with Bath-sheba died. I think anyone that has been involved with sin understands verse 14. I was drawn away by my own lust, no one else’s, my lust. I cannot blame anyone or any thing other than myself for my lust and my sin. If you are living in the land of excuse then you are far away from getting on with life and God’s plan for you. You have to come to grip with the fact that you did the sin. It was not anyone else’s fault. Take responsibility for your actions and move forward. According to Vincent’s Word Studies of the New Testament the words in James 1:15 give a clear understanding of the birth and maturity of what our lust propagates. The words hath conceived in Greek is sullabousa meaning literally having conceived. Bringeth forth is the Greek word tiktei and is a metaphor of the mother “beareth”. When it is finished in the Greek is apotelestheisa and gives the meaning when it is full grown or comes to maturity. The phrase bringeth forth here is different than the previous word tiktei. It is apokuei which is beareth and gives the idea of sin as a mature male becoming a begetter of death. I was drawn away by my own lust. That lust gave birth to sin. The sin when it matured became a father to death. The death of the ministry God gave me. The death of the trust my family and the congregation of the church God gave me. The death of a life style derived from the blessings of God that came from my ministry. My lust, my song, my sin, there is no one else to blame. I cannot even blame the Devil. You can’t either. When you find that place of responsibility and accept the fact that you alone are responsible for your sin. Then you start the way back to a relationship with God. How long does it take? It depends on you. God is always ready to restore.

Chapter 8 Restoration At the end of the last chapter I said God is always ready to restore. God is, people aren’t. Paul said to the church in Galatia “Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault (offense, sin, trespass), ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted. Galatians 6:1 According to Jamieson, Fausset and Brown commentary the word restore in Greek is katartizete is used of a dislocated limb being put back in place, According to other Greek authorities the word refers to setting bones, mending nets. The instructions are clear as to how we are to treat “fallen” brothers and sisters. We are to treat them with the same tenderness a physician would treat a broken patient. I think the key words are “ye which are spiritual”. You can throw a hand grenade into a room full of people and then criticize the way that they react, but unless you are in the room also you do not have the right to complain about their reaction. I threw the Grenade and I did criticize some of the reaction. I was astonished to find that most of the people I had associated with for thirty years were not spiritual. In fact the organization I was affiliated with has absolutely no restoration process for ministers that fall. That is terrible to say but unless in the last ten years something has changed (I’ve been out of the loop) they still do not. I had some ministers call me and offer prayer. I had some call and offer my spouse and children (all of who are excellent musicians and singers) a place to go to church. I was not included in that invitation. No one said anything about restoration. My younger brother who pastors in Birmingham Alabama came to help our family. Friends of the family from Botswana came to help in any way that they could. Some of the church people were doing all they could to aid our family in this dire situation. The organization as a whole did nothing but write Ichabod, the glory has departed, over me and my family. Not only the organization but ministers that I thought were brothers. I can understand the reaction to me. I did the sin and I needed to be removed. I do not understand the complete desertion of my family by people who consistently profess their spirituality. Maybe reader you can relate to this and maybe you cannot. I was isolated, my family was also. Isolation was a refuge for me. Isolation was the cave that I wanted to live in. I was compelled to try to put things back in order but the pieces were too far apart. All I really wanted to do was lie down in a cool dark cave.

Chapter 9 Message to Cave Dwellers

If you are dwelling in the cave of fear, self pity, frustration, hate, isolation, blame, or any other of the emotions that we hide in; you are in good company. You are among some illustrious cave dwellers listed in scripture. David dwelled in the cave of Adullam. 1Samuel 22:1 David therefore departed thence and escaped to the cave Adullam: and when his father’s house heard it, they went down thither to him. The scripture said that David escaped to the cave. Escape is probable where most of us start off in a cave. Escape from prying eyes, judgment, criticism, anger at others and most of all condemnation. David escaped to the cave and look who came to join him. Every one that was in distress and every one that was in debt and every one that was discontented. I know these became the mighty men of David’s army but at this time they were not good company. Look at the company you keep. David and his group made forays out into the light but they did not dwell there. Good things do not grow in darkness. Genesis 1:1-3 In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. And the earth was without form and void; and darkness was upon the face of the waters. And God said, Let there be light: and there was light. God did not begin the acts of creation without speaking light first. Light does not dwell in caves. Illumination cannot dwell in a cave. If you want to start the restoration process you must get into the light. You can’t just make forays you must begin to live and walk in the light so the rebuilding can start.

Another notable cave dweller was the prophet Elijah. And he came thither unto a cave, and lodged there; and, behold, the word of the Lord came to him and he said unto him, What doest thou here, Elijah? David is escaping to the cave and Elijah is lodging in the cave. Elijah plans on living in the cave. You’ve read the text. You’ve probable preached from it. God was not in the wind nor the earthquake nor the fire. He was in the still small voice. I wonder if the small voice was to bring Elijah out of the cave. You can’t hear the voice from inside the cave. Elijah came out of the cave to hear the message the small quite voice had for him. God can come into your cave, but he chooses not to come in. He wants you to come out. The message was for Elijah to move on from the cave with a mission to find and anoint Elisha. Remember Jesus called Lazarus out of the deadness of the cave He did not go in to get him. The Spirit of God will move on you, talk to you, but God will not drag you screaming from your cave. You have to desire to come out. Restoration starts with the light of the word of God. If you are blaming God for your downfall or if you do not want to allow the word to break into your darkness you will not be restored. The sin was spiritual there must be a spiritual restoration. God works from the inside out. Restoration starts in the spirit.

Chapter 10 Blinded by the Light When you are in a dark place light can be a discomfort to your eyes. I think that is why God slowly works on a cave dweller. Takes his time and by degrees brings us into light. We can’t take it all at once. I do not know how your days were after the affair or whatever you situation was that took you to where you are now. For me there was darkness in the aftermath. We moved to California. Seems like a simple sentence but it was nothing simple about it. A man and a woman travelling across the country literally from one side to another after a devastating incident that took their life away was not an easy trip. There were many moments when to me and I am sure to my ex-wife that the thought crossed my mind “I would be better off just leaving here and now”. However we made it to California. I thought we would work things out and make a new start. My ex-wife left me there after six months and moved back to Louisiana and soon after I followed. I worked as a domestic violence counselor in California and thought I would pick up the same position in Louisiana. It did not work out. There is plenty of domestic violence in Louisiana but the laws there have no teeth. For instance if you did not come to the court appointed class I facilitated in California, if you were not in the hospital or already in jail, I would call the Sheriff and the deputies would arrest you and take you to jail. In Louisiana there is no enforcement of the court appointed class. I observed a class that was suppose to have 15 people attending and only 5 showed up. When I questioned the facilitator about the retribution for not attending the class I was told there was no retribution. Needless to say there was little chance of employment in that field. Subsequently I sought employment in other areas. I have a friend since retired from the East Baton Rouge Parish Sheriff’s Office that was finishing his 25 years of service when I hit town. He ask if I would consider working for the Sheriff’s office because there was a need and the office was hiring. It was a total change of venue. Some people say that it is hard to re-invent yourself. I say you do what you must do to maintain life. I went through the Police Officers Standard Training (POST) at the ripe age of fifty. As one man said “That’s quite a change from a reverend to a cop”. Yes it was quite a change. I went from carrying a Bible to a gun. I went from a caring compassionate counselor to a cursing unsympathetic law enforcement office.

Let me say at this juncture that I hold all law enforcement professionals in the highest regard. I pray for your safety and sanity. I am in no way incriminating other officers for the way I responded to the job. I lived some of my darkest days in that profession. After the academy I was assigned to communications. It was as if the radio antenna was attached to hell itself. You worked twelve hour shifts, understaffed and most of the time the hours were filled with the misery of humanity. You saw the worst of the worst and very little of the best. I will tell you that most of the deputies I worked with (I worked in Law enforcement for three years) were caring individuals that were in their profession because they really cared about taking down the bad guys and protecting the innocent. Honest hard working men and women that risk their lives everyday to protect the public. I had my own demons that worked on me. The job just gave them a little more incentive to work harder. The thing about a job like law enforcement for a cave dweller it gives more access to the depths of the cave. You can wrap yourself in seclusion. You can hide behind “you don’t understand the pressure of the job” if someone questions your aloofness. You can stop others from entering you area by the answer to the question “What do you do for a living?” I found that the general public does not really relate well to police people. You hide in your authority and power. You can become unapproachable to almost everyone. It is the perfect job for a cave dweller. You can even take out your rage on the “bad guys”. One of the dangers is that if you are not careful the voice of God slowly gets dimmed. You find yourself believing the jargon of “If God is alive and cares why is there so much suffering?” “Why doesn’t He put an end to this misery?” If we are not careful we can wander down into this dark cavern and never return to the light. There are many different places to hide from God’s voice. You may be hiding now but if you are reading this book then you must feel the tug, see the shaft of light that is coming into your cave. I met a fellow cave dweller not long ago. The man seemed to have a cloud that hung over him and after some conversation and sharing my story I found that he indeed was and is a cave dweller. I offered him light but he is not sure how to handle it. The scriptures say in John 1:5 And the light shineth in darkness and the darkness comprehended it not. (KJV) According to Vincent’s word studies of the New Testament the Greek word for comprehended is Katelaben which is better render as apprehended/grasped or seized. Jamieson, Fausset and Brown Commentary gives the meaning of Katelaben as did not take it in. Light can be offered and not seized, grasped, or taken in by the person sitting in the dark.

If you deal with your pain, anger, frustration, self doubt and hopelessness like I did you are looking for pain killers from a source in the world. You are not looking for the only real killer of pain which is the grace and mercy of God. I found myself going to the places I had not frequented for 20 years. I found myself sitting in the dark of the house I grew up in after work drinking myself into oblivion. I even went as far as dabbling into the drug world once again. All the while inside knowing that none of these things could give me life or remove the “hounds” that were chasing me. What is your prescription? What is your pain management plan? Remember how it felt to call upon the Lord and feel the Spirit of mercy and grace remove from you the condemnation and soiled feelings. That can come again but it begins with light. I didn’t want light and did not want anyone talking to me about light. I did not want anyone to know that I “use” to be a preacher. I did not want people to talk to me about Christianity. I didn’t call on God and I didn’t feel like I could ever regain what I had so needlessly given away. I felt like Esau described in Hebrews 12:16 Lest there be any fornicator, or profane person, as Esau, who for one morsel of meat sold his birthright.(KJV) The word profane according to Adam Clark’s commentary is Bebeelos and is applied to those who were not initiated into the sacred mysteries or who were despisers of sacred things and consequently were to be denied admittance to the temple and were not permitted to assist at holy rites. Ever feel that way? Profane, not worthy to enter into the temple? Rejected even though you sought a place of restoration with tears? I know you have.

Chapter 11

Doctor My Eyes Jackson Brown wrote the song years ago about a man that was seeking medical attention because his eyes were hurting. Of course the song relates to the misery of humanity and the person with the eye problem was calloused to man kind’s misery thus the line “For having learned not how to cry.” You and I have an eye problem because cave dwellers get use to the darkness and when light is introduced then it hurts. I am not one to pad the issue. If you want to get back on track you have to endure some pain. The only way to get the eyes adjusted is to stand in the light. Find the light source. John 1:4 In him was life and that life was the light of men. Jesus knows how to introduce light. If you have been enlightened then you know the only way back is to find a place full of light. You have to get into an atmosphere of praise and worship. My back ground is Pentecostal so for me I needed to find a Pentecostal church where I could gradually get use to the light again. It was not easy for me to find a place where I felt comfortable. I did not want to go to a place and become sermon fodder for a pastor. Nor did I want to come to a place where everybody new my sin and wanted to “save” me. I basically wanted to sit in the back and get use to everything. I wanted to be left alone and with the move of the spirit I wanted to get myself back to a relationship with God. You have to search out such a place. You may be comfortable in a church where you are known or you may have to go somewhere where you are a total stranger. I went to both. I ended up because of my location in Louisiana in a small church where a lot of my family was attending. It was interesting because they had been themselves cave dwellers. Most of them were not ministers that had affairs but each of them had in they own way and for their own reason fallen away from God and were finding or had found their way back.

The pastor is a man that I had known for many years and when I talked to him I felt acceptance and that made it easy for me to attend. I did not feel any demands or obligations, just acceptance of who I was, where I was and where I had been. I am and will be eternally grateful for his spiritual attitude. I know of people that ended up in a church where they are treated as low class citizens. They are never able to shake the stain of their sin and shame. They are told that they are forgiven but they never are given the chance to use their gifts again. They are relegated to reading a scripture now and then or becoming a minion for the pastor. I’m sorry but no thanks. Call it pride or any thing you want but that is not what I call restoration. Why do I need a church you might be thinking? That is where the light is. You know that. If you were a pastor think of all the reasons you use to tell people why they need to be in church and apply them to yourself. Don’t play the “I don’t need church” game with yourself. Most of us found God in a church and that is where you will find your way back to God. Beside that you need preaching and worship. You need to hear the songs of Zion brother. Find yourself a place, open you eyes and let the light shine in.

Chapter 12 One Touch of His Hand It’s an old song and the chorus is “One touch of his hand and my troubles are gone. One touch of his hand and I’m not left alone. Every heart ache must flee, at the master’s command. Hallelujah I’m free at the touch of his hand.” God can work things out so quickly it is always amazing to me. I was still working for the sheriff’s office in East Baton Rouge Parish when I started going to church. I would go feel the spirit but I resisted the spirit’s work in my inner man. When the music started I wanted to weep but I would not let myself. It was like Saul being troubled by the evil spirit and when David played his harp the evil spirit left. I felt the spirit of the Lord move on me when the music started playing. The word at that time had very little effect on me. I believe it is as recorded in Genesis 1:2 And the earth was without form and void and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters. Some commentators believe the words without form and void refer to a cataclysmic event that plunged the earth into this shapeless desert. What ever the rendering may be I was surely a shapeless spiritual mass that was an empty wasteland. The spirit begins to move and do a work before the spoken word does its’ work. Slowly I started to respond to the move of the spirit but it took an answer to prayer for me to totally allow the spirit to work. I was police academy trained and wanted to be posted as a patrol deputy. I went through the paper work waited until the opportunity arose and put my name in for patrol. I was brought before the board and interviewed for the position. It was determined that since I had not started out in corrections as most deputies do that I should spend ninety days in the East Baton Rouge Parish Prison as a deputy. I was upset by the decision but there was nothing I could do about it. I give respect to the correction deputies and officers that work in the prison systems across our nation. It is a dirty, thankless job. The inmates have all day to plot their ways of “getting over” on you. The deputies risk life and limb every time they walk into the prison. I did not want to be there and for me it was like going to hell every day. Twelve hour shifts two weeks on days and two weeks on nights. If I have ever been in a place that had evil spirits walking around in it I was surely in one now. I am not talking about the ones that were living in the inmates I’m talking about the ones that roamed the catwalks at night. I prayed. “Jesus, get me out of here and I will let your word into my life. I will yield to your spirit.”

Seventy five days later I was out of the prison, out of the sheriff’s office and working in Our Lady of the Lake regional Medical Center in the C.O.P.E (crisis oriented psychiatric evaluation) center. This was a Catholic hospital and the whole atmosphere was different. No one wanted to hurt me. The people I saw were in trouble not with the law (a few were) and needed help. Although it wasn’t in my job description some people were open to prayer. Because of the circumstances I knew God had answered my prayer. I kept my promise and allowed the spirit to begin to break up the wasteland inside of me. You can relate, you know you feel like an empty desert in your spirit. You know you want to cry out to God for help. If you do He will help. I think I read he is a very present help in time of trouble. I can say God is not holding anything against you. Condemnation is not from God it is from self, Satan or others. Romans 8:1 tells us There is therefore now (present, this time) no condemnation (adverse sentence) to them which are in Christ Jesus. The verse stops there in the original rendering. God does not condemn us. I know that there are times when I feel the creeping black claws of condemnation began to try to take hold of me but this verse has been a life saver. Jesus said “ And this is the condemnation, that light is come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil.” If you love the light and walk into light then there is no condemnation from God. Does Satan try to contaminate your thoughts with condemnation? Sure he does, especially when you are getting back into line with the word of God. You must find a place to worship God free from condemnation and free from pressure to prove yourself. The proving comes later.

The Touch Of The Master's Hand 'Twas battered and scarred and the auctioneer Thought it scarcely worth his while To waste much time on the old violin, But he held it up with a smile. "What am I bid, good folk?" he cried. "Who'll start the bidding for me? A dollar, a dollar ... now two ... only two ... Two dollars, and who'll make it three? "Three dollars once, three dollars twice, Going for three" ... but no! From the room far back a gray-haired man Came forward and picked up the bow. Then wiping the dust from the old violin And tightening up the strings, He played a melody pure and sweet, As sweet as an angel sings. The music ceased, and the auctioneer, With a voice that was quiet and low, Said, "What am I bid for the old violin?" As he held it up with the bow. "A thousand dollars ... and who'll make it two? Two...two thousand, and who'll make it three? Three thousand once and three thousand twice ... Three thousand and gone!" said he. The people cheered, but some exclaimed "We do not quite understand ... What changed it's worth?" and the answer came: " 'Twas the touch of the master's hand." And many a man with soul out of tune And battered and scarred by sin Is auctioned cheap by the thoughtless crowd Just like the old violin. But the Master comes, and the foolish crowd Never can quite understand The worth of a soul, and the change that is wrought By the touch of the master's hand. O Master! I am the tuneless one Lay, lay Thy hand on me, Transform me now, put a song in my heart Of melody, Lord, to Thee! ~ Myra Brooks Welch ~

Chapter 13 Water in a dry place And a man shall be as an hiding place from the wind, and a covert from the tempest; as rivers of water in a dry place, as the shadow of a great rock in a weary land. Is. 32:2 You and I have been in all of these places, the wind (cold blast), the tempest (overwhelming flood), dry place (desert), weary land (faint). But the scripture tells us that a man shall be a hiding place (refuge) from all of these things. One of the traits he offers is rivers of water in a dry place. It took me a while but I had to realize once again that Jesus really means what he says. Rivers of water are offered to us. Grace is freely giving to those who do not deserve. You may feel like you do not deserve the free gifts of no condemnation, flowing moves of the spirit, forgiveness, blessing but Jesus will not withhold any good thing from us if we have really repented and are seeking the release of the spirit within us. The key is to open up your emotions to the move of the Spirit. I cried when I talked to my spouse after the affair. I cried when I spoke to my children and explained to them the disaster that I had let into our lives. I cried when I thought about the things I did to God and his church. For several years I would be overtaken with emotion when I looked at my life and how I let God and the people I loved down. At some place you have to let Jesus help you get over the sting of the regret, the repentance and shame and begin to cry in another way when the Spirit starts to break up the fallow ground. Cry with thanksgiving and praise for what God is doing for you. For thus saith the Lord to the men of Judah and Jerusalem, Break up your fallow ground, and sow not among thorns. Jer. 4:3. Thus saith the Lord to You! You! You! Reader! break up your fallow ground. Fallow ground is ground that was once tilled but has lain uncultivated for a long time. You were once tilled, sowed, and harvested. A place where the things of God grew, fruit of the Spirit, gifts of the Spirit, words of knowledge and blessing to those that heard you speak. You gave comfort to the hurting and the grieving. You helped those that were in need. Hours in prayer for the people you ministered to so they could feel the benefit from Godâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s word. You once were tilled but you have lain uncultivated for a long time and thorns have replaced the good things that once grew. The prophet said you break up your fallow ground. How do I do that you might ask? The answer is in response.

I was in service at a large church in Elk Grove California in 2001. My son was on the staff at this church and I was attending the services. There was a point in the service where several people including the ministerial staff gathered around to pray for me. The prayers were there, the Spirit was there, but the water was falling on fallow ground. My son said to me â&#x20AC;&#x153;Dad why donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t you respond to what you feelâ&#x20AC;? I could not. I was not through mourning over my past and still condemning myself for my present situation. I do remember when I began to respond to the gentle prodding of the Holy Ghost and I could feel the fallow ground began to break up. You have to respond. God will not work with an unresponsive product. He that believeth on me as the scriptures have said out of his belly will flow rivers of living water. Jesus said He that believeth on me as the scriptures have said. Believing is response to what you have seen, and heard, an acceptance of the facts. You must respond at some point. The Spirit of God will move you and prod you but there must be a response. Remember there is a time when God said my spirit will not always strive with man. The word used for strive means to direct. God is saying I will not continue to direct an unresponsive ship. There cannot be sowing in the midst of thorns. Response gets the thorns out and starts the river moving.

Chapter 14

Comfort in Hebrews 6 I’m sure you have heard of the man that was seeking the will of God for his life and prayed “God show me in your word what you would have me do.” “I will turn in your word and where my eyes fall I will take it as your word for me.” The man turned in his bible and his eyes fell on Matthew 27 verse 5 which said And he cast down the pieces of silver in the temple, and departed and went and hanged himself. The man said “ Lord I am going to do this one more time for clarification and what you say I will do. So he turned in his bible and his eyes fell on the last part of John 13 verse 27 which said That thou doest do quickly. Sometimes the word can be a sword that the enemy will use to kill us. Remember Satan knows the scriptures and used them out of context with Jesus in the wilderness of temptation. For me He used Hebrews chapter six verses one through eight. Therefore leaving the principles of the doctrine of Christ, let us go on to perfection; not laying again the foundation of repentance from dead works, and of faith toward God, of the doctrine of baptisms, and of laying on of hands, and of resurrection of the dead, and of eternal judgment. and this we will do, if God permit. (here is the part that use to eat me alive) For it is impossible for those who were once enlightened (me) and have tasted of the heavenly gift (me) and were made partakers of the Holy Ghost (me) And have tasted the good word of God, (me) and the powers of the world to come (me) If they should fall away, (me) to renew them again unto repentance; (me) seeing they crucify to themselves the Son of God afresh,(me) and put him to an open shame(me again). This passage of scripture was a constant burden to me and no matter how good I felt or how much I felt the power of the Spirit I would get back to this passage and feel like I could never be saved much less restored. God gave me the key to my dilemma in verses seven and eight. For the earth which drinketh in the rain that cometh oft upon it, and bringeth forth herbs meet for them by whom it is dressed, receiveth blessings from God: But that which beareth thorns and biers is rejected, and is nigh unto cursing; whose end is to be burned. What is being said here? I fell away, walked into darkness, sought a cave to dwell in and tried not to hear the voice of God calling to me. We are the earth. We drink

in the rain of the Spirit and if we allow the rain to nourish our spirits then we bring forth herbs for God and we are blessed. But if we allow our natural man to continually block the rain and continue to bring forth thorns then we will be forever lost. Remember Jeremiah said do not sow in the midst of the thorns You have to allow yourself to respond to what the Spirit wants to do, which is to restore you. To bring you back into a harvest of the fruit of God. Do not allow yourself to make excuses or go back into the blame game. Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him. But God hath revealed them unto us by his Spirit: for the Spirit searcheth all things, yea, the deep things of God. I Cor. 2:9-10 God will reveal to you what he has in store for you. Do not be afraid of what God wants to do. We are in the last days of the Church dispensation and the church needs warriors. The church needs smiths, men and women that know how to make and use weapons, people that can give weapons to the world around us so that they can fight a spiritual battle. When God spoke to me and revealed to me that I had finally allowed the rain of the Spirit to do its work in me and I was not an impossible one, a rejected one I rejoiced in his presence and gave him praise. If you are reading this book then you are allowing God to speak to you through these humble pages. You are letting rain into the earth and you have broken up fallow ground. Congratulations.

Chapter 15 Spring Up Oh Well

We have come out of the cave. We are walking in the light. We are enjoying the light. We are fighting off the desire to run back inside the cave. Even after you have been out of the cave for a while there are times when the darkness of the cave comes calling. We are allowing the Spirit to move us, breaking up the fallow ground and clearing out the thorns so the word can be sown in a thorn free environment. The water is beginning to flow and new growth is coming forth, a renewing like spring time after a hard New England winter. After the snow goes and the ground begins to warm the first green sprouts of grass start to emerge. This is what will or is happening to you. In order for vegetation to grow there must be light and water. You are coming out of the dark days of sin, depression, condemnation and guilt, just to name a few areas of darkness. I can say from experience it is a wonderful feeling when you get on the “flip side” of your situation. What I mean by that is when you start feeling the familiar spiritual actions that you felt before the fall. When you can walk into God’s presence and not feel like you have entered a sacred place uninvited, like a stranger to your surroundings. You begin to realize that when you worship you can feel the rivers begin to flow.

There is a difference in the rivers of living waters flowing out of us and the rain of the Spirit falling upon us. In Genesis 2:5 b the Bible tells us that “The Lord God had not caused it to rain upon the earth and there was not a man to till the ground. I personally believe that tilling the ground is part of the curse. I believe that man was put in the Garden of Eden to worship God and keep Satan out. According to Strong’s Exhaustive Concordance of the Bible the Hebrew word for dress in Genesis 2:15 is Abad which can be translated as worship. I think that all the tilling and toiling came as a result of sin. If Eden was the pristine perfect garden of the Lord then what was there to till and toil over? The point I am trying to get to is in verse 6 of Genesis chapter 2. The phrase “there went up a mist from the earth” and watered the whole face of the ground. (KJV) is translated “but streams came up from the earth” and watered the whole surface of the ground in the NIV. There were under ground streams that came from the earth and watered everything. We know from Genesis 2:10 that a river went out of Eden to water the garden. Before sin entered the picture the world was watered by streaming rivers. What’s the point? The point is that you before your sin and me before my sin had the rivers flowing from us as promised by Jesus in John 7:38. The Spirit flows out of us it does not rain upon us. When we collectively gather together to worship God and He is in our midst, we feel the presence of His Spirit. The power of the Spirit comes from within us and flows out to water the ground. I believe ground is typical of the natural man. The waters flows from the spiritual man into the soul of man and finally is manifested in our body. It is a natural manifestation of the renewed man. This world needs a flowing of the healing river of life that flows from the church the body of Christ. So, my friend, you have got to get the Spirit flowing out of you. When the inward man is healed and receiving light from Jesus then the mind, will, and emotions will soon follow.

Chapter 16 Remember ye not the former things This verse in Isaiah 43:18 goes on to say neither consider the things of old. The following verse declares Behold I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall ye not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert. Up to this point I have dealt with the concept of getting out of the cave and getting into a place of light. In other words repenting, (if you have not) getting over blaming everyone else for your sin and coming to a place where you allow God to restore the inner man. A spiritual renewal if you will, a home coming as the prodigal son. Hopefully now you are in a church or considering going to a church. You are allowing Godâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s word and Spirit to lead you out of the past and into a future that He has for you. But as it is written, Eye hath not seen nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him. I Cor. 2:9 This scripture is used many times of the future reward of the church but I think it can also apply to us that are coming back to God. He has things prepared for us. I Cor. 2:10 tell us But God hath revealed them to us by his Spirit: for the Sprit searcheth all things, yes, the deep things of God. There is no way you or I can know what God has for us if we do not allow the Spirit to search our spirits. When this happens God restores us back to a child of His kingdom and not a wayward child. What I have found is I cannot re-create the past. When I was living in the old homestead after the death of my mother, I was clearing out everything that she had and things that I brought with me when I moved in. I came across tablets filled with old sermon notes. Messages I preached as far back as 1982 when I first started the church in New England. As I looked over these sermons and study notes I felt the anger, guilt, remorse and self pity rise up in me. I said to myself â&#x20AC;&#x153;I will never need these againâ&#x20AC;? and dumped them all into the trash container. When I moved to Hawaii and begin to minister in Legacy I was reminded of all the notes I threw away. As I was pondering my stupidity the Lord spoke to me and said you do not need those things I will make something new at the time I though o.k. but I could sure use some of those notes. What I have found is that I am in a different place in the spirit then I was at that time. The years between 1982 and 1999 I had a successful ministry and I felt like I was in a comfortable place as far as

revelation and understanding of the scriptures. I will tell you at this point there is a vast difference in my ministry. I do not believe that God puts us in places to fail because He wants to teach us. I believe that choices we make and Satan put us in places to fail. I do believe that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose Romans. 8:28. I have walked through dark places emotionally and spiritually. I made the choice to do the things I have done the things that caused me the pain and sorrow that came. I made choices that caused others pain and sorrow. God did not put me there. I put me there. Did God know where I was going? Yes he did but God respects my desire and will. Have I learned from this experience? YES! Godâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s plan for me is not to recreate the past but to allow him to lead me into what he has for me in the future. He has a future for you also.

Chapter 17 Take ye away the stone John chapter 11 deals with the death and resurrection of Lazarus. Jesus was close to this family and used the death of Lazarus to show his power over death and the glory of the resurrection. When Lazarus died he was bound in grave clothes and laid in a cave that was closed with a large stone. When Jesus came to the grave of Lazarus he commanded that the stone be taken away. There were objections to this order from the relatives. I bring this to your attention because we have been dealing with a person’s return to God after a time away, after sin has put a breach between you and God’s love. I wrote about cave dwellers and the need to come out into the light. I wrote about breaking up fallow ground and letting the new growth to take place. We have allowed the river of the Spirit to begin to flow out of us as worship has been restored. We feel like we have been restored unto God and to ourselves. If you are not restored to yourself you cannot move into your ministry again. You have to allow yourself to feel the forgiveness of God and feel the cleansing of your consciousness. I know in order for me to get inspiration and feel freedom to preach the word of the Lord I had to feel the release of my conscious from guilt. How much more shall the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit offered himself without spot to God, purge your conscience from dead works to serve the living God? Hebrews 9:14. This scripture is telling us the blood is not a cleansing of the flesh but it purges (Greek KATHARIEI which is to purify from fear, guilt, alienation and selfishness which is the source of dead works) our conscience. You and I have to let the blood of Christ do the work intended to cleanse and wipe our spiritual man clean of guilt and condemnation. After we know our conscience is free from condemnation and guilt then we have to start dealing with the people around us. It was Martha, Lazarus’s sister that objected to the removing of the stone. She said to Jesus “Lord, by this time he stinketh.” You and I have to realize that there are folks that do not want us out of the cave, to them we stink. They have not forgotten what we did. Some were close relatives as in Martha’s case. We caused them pain and grief. We caused their lives to turn upside down and they do not want us out of the cave. The stench of our sin is still in their nostrils no matter how many years it has been. Then there are those that do not want us out of the cave because we sinned against their idea of regulation of who should be in the ministry. They decide that because a man used of God sinned then his ministry is over forever. These people

forget their own sins and all the times that a minister has come to their aid to help them feel the forgiveness of God and restore them. I understand “to whom much is given much is required” but also there is forgiveness with God. I believe there has to be some regulation of who is in the ministry and who isn’t. I am speaking with regard to organizational standards. A person can start their own ministry and church without being accountable to an organization. If we believe, as Christians, that God forgives all sin then we have to allow the fact that the forgiveness includes fallen ministers also. There are some that will let us out of the cave but never loose us. Jesus said “loose him and let him go.” I know of a man that had an excellent ministry. This brother went to an area of the country that did not have many churches of his denomination. He and his family started a church in their garage and in a few years had a thriving church. He had an affair and left the ministry. After a few years he was in a church and began to teach bible studies. There were a few people that brought to the pastor’s attention that this was going on and did not want this brother to continue to teach studies. These people did not want the man out of the tomb and certainly did not want to loose him. The organization you were with may not want you out of the cave. I have been blessed by men that allowed me to preach in their churches. Some years after the affair my elder brother and I were having a conversation about my ministry continuing and I said to him “I don’t think anyone will allow me to preach in their church”. He said “I do not see why not”. I responded “Would you”? He said “Yes, let’s pick a date”. He was letting me out of the cave. He was loosing me and letting me go. I am grateful for him. Another friend allowed me to speak in his church. At this time I am part of the ministry team and speak at Legacy Church on a regular basis. I did not think I would want to preach again but when I came into a healthy environment that allowed the Spirit to move freely and I did not feel condemnation coming from the ministry or the staff the fire started to burn in the belly again. I also have had supernatural encounters to give me encouragement to pursue a ministry. I have had more supernatural encounters in the last four years than in previous years. I think the reason for the encounters is because God has used (I do not mean God was responsible) my sin to take away my pride and let me understand I am totally reliant upon Him. Now unto him that is able to keep you from falling, and to present you faultless before the presence of his glory with exceeding joy To the only wise God our Saviour, be glory and majesty, dominion and power, both now and ever. Jude 1:24-25.

I know you may not have brothers that are pastors or a son that pastors a church, but someone must know you well enough to allow you to start building your ministry again. The pulpit may not be the first place to start. Maybe you should start teaching bible studies in your living room. If you have followed the procedure in this book then I assume you have started going to church. If you are involved in a church then your pastor must know something about your past. If you are allowing the Spirit of God to speak to you through the word and you are spending time in prayer, then you will be ready when a door opens for you. Do not be impatient. We have to trust that God will know the right place and time. You may have to go through doors that are not normal for you. I mentioned in one part of this writing that we cannot recreate the past. We are creatures of habit but God may want to use you in an entirely different way than you were used before and in an entirely different manner. God will make this clear to you. I cannot emphasis enough the need for prayer and listening to God’s voice this will help you when Satan begins to attack. Fear is usually the weapon that Satan will launch at you as you start to seek your ministry. Fear of people, fear that you will not be affective and fear that you will fail again. We all understand the battle with fear. Remember Peter did sink but he was the only one that got out of the boat. I’m sure when he got back to the boat and everything settled down some of the other disciples might have chided him with “You sunk.” Peter could always reply “Yep, but I got out of the boat”. Fear is Satan’s greatest weapon. How many men and women do not answer the call of God at all because of fear. How many never venture into areas they know God is leading them to because of fear gifts of the Spirit, deeper walks with God understanding and presenting bible truths that are revealed to them but will never be made known to congregations because they are afraid of what people might think. Remember fear kept Israel out of the promise land and it will keep you from pursuing the will of God if you allow it. It is interesting to me that the same people who want to keep a person bound and in the cave are the same ones who throw out the scripture “For the gifts and calling of God are without repentance.” Romans 11:29. The scripture is saying that once God makes a promise to someone be it a nation or an individual or calls the same he cannot take it back. Standing on that understanding there would have to be a place of reconciliation on the part of the church (I use church as the whole body) and a minister that has sinned. We do understand that what people say with their mouths do not always line up with what is in their hearts. Be aware of the people that want to keep you bound and in the cave.

Chapter 18 The Proving Trail At the end of chapter twelve I mentioned that the proving comes later. It does come and has to be dealt with. One of the great western writer Louis Lâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;Amourâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s books is titled The Proving Trail. The story is of a young man that goes out to find the men that murdered his father. His trail is a proving trail. It tested him and his dedication to his mission. You and I will be tested along the way especially if we are endeavoring to do the work of God again. Tested by ourselves, people that want to keep us in the cave and by Satan and his minions. Our spirit becomes a proving ground for our dedication to our mission. Are we able to get back into the race? We above all people know our capabilities for sin. We understand our frailty and how carnal we can be. I work at a five diamond resort in Hawaii. This place is known for outstanding service and taking care of the guest. The property I work at is one of the premier properties of this organization and caters to some of the most prestigious people in the world. Everyone from high ranking diplomats to movie stars come to relax at this location. There are three pools on the property and at any time there are beautiful women lounging at these pools. When I first started working at this resort I thought what a terrible thing to be tossed into this area where objects of lust are so available. The issue is objects of lust are available everywhere for a person with lust in their heart. Jesus said Whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her in his heart.Matt.5:28. Walking around the pool area in my normal routine patrol I have every opportunity to look on a woman to lust after her. The idea that Jesus is addressing is intent. To look to lust is the question. There is nothing wrong with looking at someone but if my intent is to lust after the person then I am committing adultery in my heart. The bottom line is lust is the totality of selfishness. When a person is in lust they do not care about the person or anyone else in the moment except what they are lusting for. Total concentration is on fulfilling my desire for the object. No care for the family of the person, no care for the people in my own family, and no care for what God may think about it. At the moment of lust I become my own God with my own set of rules and demands. We can all state our reasons for doing what we did but we also know that the main reason was selfishness. I wanted what I wanted when I wanted it. Both parties in an affair are acting in total selfishness. I understand that this is a simplification of the issues that lead up to an affair. If we think about it there are ways to work on the relationship or dissolve

the relationship before a catastrophe happens. The question may be asked “What if you do not believe in a divorce?” I am certain that you do not believe in an affair and the aftermath of what has occurred in your life. The purpose of this book is not to counsel a marriage or look into the reasons for conflicts in relationships. The bottom line is if you are in this spot reading this book the road you took along with me and many others was the road to selfishness and sin. I was at work one day and a co-worker ask if I wanted to walk down by the pool because there were a lot of beautiful woman basking in the sun. My reply was no thanks I think I will go another route. He said “Oh , you only do that when you are alone”. This was a probing statement that made me analyze myself and look at what I do when I am alone. I can say that God has helped me in this area. Can you look on a woman and not lust after her? To live in the world and carry on any personal interaction we have to look at one another. I must maintain a heart with pure intent. The key is to guard the heart and the intent of the heart with love.

Chapter 19 Love one another Sounds simple doesn’t it? Love your neighbor as yourself. How is that possible? I am to love you as I love myself? The only way this kind of love can happen is with the power of God. E.W. Kenyon ask the question in his book New Creation Realities chapter twenty seven “What Have you done with love”? Kenyon then quotes Romans 5:5 from the Weymouth translation which reads “The love of God has flooded our spirits; absorbed us; taken us over.” How do I keep lust out of my heart and keep my intent pure? I have to allow the love of God to flood my spirit; absorb me and totally take me over. How do I bring into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ? This scripture is found in II Corinthians 10:5 Casting down imaginations and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing every thought to the obedience of Christ. According to Vincent’s Word Studies of the New Testament Paul is using a military metaphor that he has carried through from the preceding verse. The Greek word for bringing into captivity is aichmalootizontes which means leading away captive. The idea is once we have demolished the stronghold of the enemy we lead the captives to the new stronghold which is Jesus Christ. Our thoughts then are controlled by the word and Spirit of God instead of our carnal man and Satan. The stronghold of Jesus is love. We are born again by the love of God. We are sustained by the love of God. All men know that we are Christians because we love one another. If I love Jesus I will keep his commandments no matter how much I want to break them. If I love another person I will not want to hurt them, use them, destroy or hurt their loved ones. When I step out of the love of God and into self love is when my trouble begins. Satan can and will shoot fiery darts into my mind but I cannot let them take hold. This means that a thought that crosses my mind is not sin it is a fiery dart that the enemy is shooting at me. The human mind is the play ground for Godly thoughts or satanic thoughts. This is why the bible spends time on the mind of man and our thoughts. As humans we can’t keep thoughts from coming into our minds, but we do have control over where these thoughts go and how we use them. Isaiah 26:3 declares Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee. The idea is that God will give peace to the person whose

thoughts are leaning on Him. The Hebrew word for mind (yeetser) comes from the word (Yaatsar) which means to form, create or devise something. The word for mind then gives the connotation of the things formed as in our thoughts. If we keep our thoughts leaning on the things of God then we can have peace, peace as it is in the original language. This is why the Paul tells us to cast down every imagination and high thing that comes against the knowledge of God. We have to cancel out the thought of sin and allow the thoughts of God to take control. James tells us “But every man is tempted when he is drawn away of his own lust and enticed.” James 1:14. The fleeting though is not what takes me into sin, it is making the thought my own. The Greek word for drawn away is exelkomenos which means as beast are enticed from a place of safety to a place with snares. The Greek word for enticed is deleazomenos which means as a fish with bait. We are drawn as a beast from Gods protection to danger by our own lust and because we are lusting Satan drops in the bait just like we do when catching fish. I went fishing not long ago off the coast of the Big Island and if you are fishing for the big ones you troll for the catch. Trolling is to fish with a baited line trailing behind a slowly moving boat. Satan is always trolling. He is always putting out bait, always looking for someone that has been lead away from safety by their own lust. We can be sure he will entice us and the bait he uses has been time tested. I believe the sin is in dwelling on the thought and then letting the imagination take us to places we should not be. When I am drawn away by my own lust I am acting in total selfishness and I am allowing my carnal mind to rule. The bottom line is the love of God must over rule the love of self. This applies to us because we sinned when we stepped into I do not care land and became selfish. We were looking for the bait, Satan hooked us, landed us and skinned us. When David sinned with Bathsheba do you think it was on his first trip to the roof? I doubt it. He saw her and then kept going back until he could resist no more. Drawn away by his own lust and enticed. Satan was trolling and David was following the bait. Before he knew it he was on the line and unable to get off. How many times in your mind have you gone back to the incident and saw how easy it would have been just to walk away. There was a place when we made a decision to sin. It was an act of the will. It is amazing how far sin will take a person. In David’s case it was adultery then murder.

Chapter 20 Back In The Battle When I started this book I set some parameters. This was not to be a place to lambast any group or organization. The purpose of this book is not to take issue with any person or to place blame on anyone. The idea is to come to a full understanding that blame for my actions falls totally on my shoulders. If you are ready to take responsibility for your actions then you can and will by the love of God move forward. I pray that God will place this book in the right places and in the right hands to help someone that has fallen. Also, that if you have a loved one or a friend that is a cave dweller you can give them this shaft of light and with prayer it will bring them out of their cave. We must remember that the power of Christianity is the forgiveness of sin. Jesus’ death and resurrection cleanses us from sins past, present and future. Our sin did not slip up on Jesus. When he called us he knew when we would sin, where we would sin and who we would sin with. He called us anyway because he loves us and shed his blood for our sins before we knew anything about Him. The old gospel song says “when he was on the cross I was on his mind.” I John 2:1-2 My little children, these things I write unto you, that ye sin not. And if any man sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous: And he is the propitiation for our sins: not for ours only, but for the sins of the whole world. Jesus is our advocate and our propitiation. As advocate his death, burial and resurrection stands at the throne of God releasing us from the jurisdiction of the law. As our propitiation he is the meeting place for us and God. His blood covers the law as the mercy seat covered the tablets of stone contained in the ark of the covenant and gives us a place to commune with God. The road back to a relationship with God and a ministry starts with communion with God. After that comes the renewing of the friendship, repairing the broken places and starting on the journey to restoration. Are you ready for the journey? God is ready for you. God wants you back in the battle for time is short.

Bobby Sutton was born again in 1974 from a world of drugs and crime. His preaching ministry began on the streets of Baton Rouge Louisiana with a group of new converts. He was ordained in 1976 by the UPC. He and his wife served as missionaries to Indonesia and the Philippines. Upon returning to the US they started a church and pastored several others through the years. He received a BA in Theology from Twin Cities University in West Monroe Louisiana and a MA in Christian Counseling from International Bible College and Seminary in Independence MO. He holds ministerial license with the International Circle of Faith (http://www.icof.net). He is father of three great children all of whom are serving the Lord. He married Darlene on 10-10-10 in Kailua Kona Hawaii and currently lives in Mckinney. The Book: I Slept With Potiphar's Wife is Bobby's story and is intended to help others to be restored. We all have Potiphar's wives and if we allow them they will keep us from fulfilling the will of God in our lives. Darlene is mother of two. Married at a young age, became head of household. The need to assume the position as a survivor was not a choice. Married for 23 years and moved 30 times. In 1997 restarted a career in the financial industry. Received a Business Mgmt diploma from College for financial planning. Moved to Hawaii in ’03 and opened her own office. Being female in a man’s world made the growth challenging. Went from scratch start, to managing almost $40 million in 3 years. In summer of 2010 she was seeking for what my true purpose was. God laid on her heart this mission statement.’ In enrich the lives of women who have not been given the liberty to pursue their potential”. Once values and goals were aligned the purpose became clear. This meant resigning a 15 year career. Darlene and Bobby Sutton Both walking in Christ as He leads, they are working as a team for Holiday Retirement as managers for Senior living community awaiting God's plan. To book the Suttons for speaking engagements please contact: Mail: P.O Box 941273 Plano Texas 75094 or email: bbbysutton@yahoo.com or phone: 928-707-0473