Child Magazine | Cape Town March 2012

C a p e

To w n ’ s

b e s t

g u i d e

f o r

pa r e n t s

to smack or not to smack

deciding on discipline

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inspirational travel ideas

a luxury stay at a private game reserve

www.childmag.co.za

March 2012

free

getaways

health

education

entertainment

The topic of holidays, past and future, is a firm favourite at our dinner table.

We laugh at the many strange places we have been to and dream of unexplored destinations we would still love to visit, in SA and beyond. Each year we try to tick off a brand-new destination.

Travelling as a family is not cheap, but every cent we have spent on past holidays has been so worth it. This year, our focus isn’t so much on where we go, but who we go with. As the children get older, they want different things out of their holidays, but mostly they just want to be with their mates.

This April, we are going one better than mates, we are making a long trek to meet up with my brother, who lives in Australia, at a “half-way” destination. All of this so that the cousins can have a long, long-overdue holiday together. With four teenagers and a 10 year old, the fun factor outranks the number of stars next to the hotel’s name.

Whether they are in a Bedouin tent in Jordan, on a lounger in Bali or sleeping under the stars on the banks of the Orange River, this holiday will be all about family, and lots and lots of laughter…

Here’s to stretching the budget, for the sake of family, and cracking a smile while doing so.

Happy holidays, home or away.

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Hunter House PUB L IS H ING

Publisher Lisa Mc Namara • lisa@childmag.co.za

Editorial

monthly circulation Cape Town’s Child magazineTM 45 129 40 257 Durban’s Child magazineTM 52 845 Joburg’s Child magazineTM

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Client Relations Lisa Waterloo • capetown@childmag.co.za

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Accounts Nicolene Baldy • admin@childmag.co.za Tel: 021 465 6093 • Fax: 021 462 2680

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Office address: Unit 7, Canterbury Studios, 35 Wesley Street, Gardens, Cape Town. Tel: 021 465 6093, fax: 021 462 2680, email: capetown@childmag.co.za. Annual subscriptions (for 11 issues) cost R165, including VAT and postage inside SA. Printed by Paarl Web. Copyright subsists in all work published in Cape Town’s Child magazineTM. We welcome submissions but retain the unrestricted right to change any received copy. We are under no obligation to return unsolicited copy.

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March 2012

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contents march 2012

upfront 3

18

a note from lisa

6 over to you

readers respond

features 16 holiday without the hassle

f amily getaways should be stress free, says Christina Castle

regulars

18 spare the rod

8 wins

10 best for baby – crack the

baby code

the debate rages on: should you smack your child? Lisa Lazarus looks at both sides of the argument

24 a river adventure

Sue Segar and her family spend a weekend canoeing near Plett

26 stand by me

Vanessa Papas gives advice on how to help your child make friends

13 upfront with paul

Paul Kerton gives some healthy eating tips 14 dealing with difference

techno tools can change the world

for those with different needs.

By Jacqui Tooke

28 get your paws sticky

Ruwaydah Lillah helps you understand your infant’s cries

Paddington Bear shares his favourite recipes in this book authored by Michael Bond

health

32

12 digesting dairy

what to do if your child is lactose intolerant. By Tamlyn Vincent

24

32 resource – dream destinations near and far

we’ve compiled a list of inspirational travel ideas from all over the world

36 a good read

new books for the whole family

38 what’s on in march 50 last laugh

Sam Wilson talks about her lifelong love affair with piñatas

classified ads 44 family marketplace 46 let’s party

this month’s cover images are supplied by:

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March 2012

Cape Town

Durban

Johannesburg

shutterstock.com

shutterstock.com

shutterstock.com

magazine cape town

magazine cape town

March 2012

5

letters

over to you

managing hyperactivity My five-year-old son is hyperactive and the teachers battle to keep him from causing too much havoc. Luckily he is in a very good school and they have in-house support, such as occupational therapists and psychologists. Before assuming that he has ADHD, I am taking him to a doctor who will look at his diet, toxicity levels and allergies. He has his bad days where he just cannot sit still and comes home in tears because he is always in “trouble”. Though, we have already removed as many “bad” foods from his diet as possible. He is taking all the right oils, doesn’t watch television and does lots of physical activities. We manage his sensory environment and give lots of hugs and kisses, and rewards.

Greta

breast-feeding and HIV

sun facts In the article on sunscreen (“here comes the sun”, December 2011/January 2012), I was surprised to read that using a high factor is recommended. When we were on holiday in Australia, a leader in sun care and skin cancer research, we were looking to buy high SPF creams in the stores, but they only sell up to factor 15. A higher factor contains too many chemicals and could also cause skin cancer. Secondly, Australian children who don’t bring their hats and sun lotion to school are not allowed in.

Ilse Kock

shocking service In December, my seven-year-old son was put on a flight from Cape Town to Johannesburg, as an unaccompanied minor, to visit his grandparents. As I had used a reputable airline, I trusted that they would have all the correct security procedures in place to ensure my child’s safety. However, to my horror, my child was abandoned in the terminal and was discovered, by accident, by his grandmother when he left the building by himself. No attendant was in sight and to date no family member, or any other authorised person for that matter, has signed for his release from this airline. On their records, the child is still in their custody. I believe airlines should stop offering this as a service until they can guarantee the safety of the children in their care.

Carin

time out Kim Maxwell’s “talk it through” (February 2012) resonated so much with the incessant arguments and difficulties my husband and I were experiencing in trying to be “selfless parents” to a busy three-and-a-half year old and a newborn. It is so tempting to get frustrated and blameshift, especially when you are exhausted and deprived of sleep and recreation. I immediately read the article to my husband, as we were about to launch into another round of arguing about who does more and who feels more unappreciated. The tips to smooth the way helped us find a way forward without anger and resentment. Then I read Paul Kerton’s piece “time for tough love”, about being a little selfish occasionally, and it gave me the impetus to start looking after myself. You made a difference today!

Zainub

ritalin debate I feel compelled to provide a voice for the many parents who have found Ritalin a useful adjunct in the management of their child’s ADD/ADHD. My son had

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March 2012

I refer to your article “no substitutes” (February 2012). I am pleased that the magazine is making readers aware of the national government policy change with regard to providing free formula milk to HIV-positive mothers. However, as one of the scientists informing this policy change, I would like to add to the statement in the article that “patients at private hospitals and clinics will still have access to formula”. All HIV-positive women who choose not to breast-feed, despite the government’s decision to support breast-feeding as the recommended

becomes less incentivised by the provision of free

feeding method, can choose to purchase formula.

formula. I just wanted to make that clear as I’m

One of the main criticisms of this policy change

sure some readers will misinterpret this, and the

is that it is denying HIV-positive women’s rights to

policy change, as being discriminatory towards HIV-

formula feed. On the contrary, HIV-positive women

positive women.

still have the right not to breast-feed, but the choice

Dr Tanya Doherty

just started school when we noticed his inability to concentrate. His wonderful teachers were happy to work around his needs. However, by the time he reached Grade 2, it was clear that he could not sit still and focus, which meant he did not achieve what he was capable of.

Out of desperation, I contacted a paediatric neurologist, who in turn recommended an educational psychologist.

He diagnosed ADD and recommended a trial of Ritalin, among other behaviour modification techniques. We were told it did not work for everybody, and we would know soon if it was going to be helpful in our case.

The difference was amazing. Our son was able to shut out the “fuzz” in his brain. He started concentrating and working to achieve according to his abilities. This has given him an enormous sense of pride. The benefits also extended beyond the classroom. Most medications have side-effects and drugs in themselves are not good or bad.

But instead of using emotive language when referring to them, an understanding of how they work, and the tradeoff of benefits versus side effects in each individual case is warranted. In our case, Ritalin and its derivatives are beneficial and should not be vilified or just dismissed.

Irene Teachers are quick to tell parents to take their child for an assessment, to see if he needs Ritalin. After answering “no” to all the questions given to us by a paediatric neurologist, she still recommended Ritalin and the “we can reassess at a later stage” approach for my six year old. When he turned seven, the teacher suggested another assessment, as he tended to lose concentration, forcing the teachers to repeat themselves. After doing my own research, I told the teacher I would not put my son on a drug with such horrific side effects so that she doesn’t have to “repeat herself”. If we refuse to give our children the drug, we are labelled as the parent who doesn’t want their child to succeed when it would just take one small tablet a day. Even when you discuss the side effects, the experts simply say you must monitor your child and they will adjust the dosage. I refuse to alter my child’s personality or the chemicals in his brain.

Teachers should just do what they did before the drug was so freely available: get on with teaching and stop trying to drug our children.

Dan

a happy winner I would like to say a huge thank you to Child magazine and Accessorize/Monsoon for the beautiful party dress I won. Congratulations also on presenting a really worthwhile and informative read each month.

Shahiema Abdullatief-Slamdien

party guide worth it Our company featured in your 2010 party issue and it was fantastic exposure. We would like to be in this year’s edition again.

Romy Honneysett, Vanilla Milkshake Events Ed’s note: The party guide is published in the May issue and you can send your details to lucille@childmag.co.za

thanks paul That was such a great breath of fresh air from Paul Kerton (“time for tough love”, February 2012). We need more of that.

Dawn We have now started thinking of ourselves and not always of the children. We have had quite a few date nights all because of you. Thanks.

Ingrid

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The opinions reflected here are those of our readers and are not necessarily held by Hunter House Publishing.

magazine cape town

magazine cape town

March 2012

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wins

giveaways in march game getaway Garden Route Game Lodge is situated close to Cape Town in a malaria-free area. Features include family rooms and child friendly dining plus game drives, children activity programs, Reptile Centre and Cheetah Outreach Centre, hot and cold swimming pools and children’s themed play parks. Contact: 028 735 1200, reservations@grgamelodge. co.za or visit grgamelodge.co.za One reader stands a chance to win a weekend away for two adults and two children, including accommodation, breakfast, three game drives and an elephant interaction valued at R14 000. Simply enter via childmag.co.za/wins-ct and use the code “Game Lodge CT”.

sweet dreams Protect-A-Bed® keeps your mattress like new with their wide range of breathable, waterproof mattress and pillow protection products. Mattresses and pillows are protected from spills, stains, allergens and irritants like dust mites and bacteria. For more information, contact: info@protectabed.co.za or visit protectabed.co.za Four readers stand a chance to win a ProtectA-Bed® family pack containing mattress and pillow protectors, valued at R750. Simply enter via childmag.co.za/wins-ct and use the code “ProtectA-Bed® CT”. Your details will be made available to Protect-A-Bed®.

shopping spree

sleep tight

Polo introduces a crayoninspired palette for the Polo boys’ collection. Golfers are updated with a big pony and signature classic chinos and striped shirts are available.

Young ladies’ golfers come in cupcake-cute pastel shades of pink and lilac. Favourites include the golfer dress, floral dress and denim collection. For more information, contact: 011 258 7600 or visit polo.co.za One reader stands a chance to win a voucher for a shopping experience in a regional Polo store, valued at R2 000. Simply enter via childmag.co.za/wins-ct and use the code “Polo CT”.

Puckababy re-innovates swaddling with their contemporary and safe alternative for wrapping babies.

The first-months’ sleeping bag is soft and comfortable, ensuring peaceful sleep. It is suitable for babies up to three months old.

For more information, contact: 072 899 8937, info@puckababy. co.za or visit puckababy.co.za Four readers stand a chance to win one Piep, the original swaddling sleeping bag, in the colour of their choice, valued at R495. Simply enter via childmag.co.za/wins-ct and use the code “Puckababy CT”. Your details will be made available to Puckababy.

to enter simply visit childmag.co.za

or post your entry to PO Box 12002, Mill Street, 8010. Entries close 31 March 2012. Only one entry per reader.

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March 2012

congratulations to our December/January winners Natasha Bergstedt and Stacy Henkel who each win a Cool Gear Inc hamper; Joy Buys van Niekerk, Carol Legg, Elzanna Swartz, Reinet Naudé and Agnes Knowles who each win a pair of Skechers Twinkle Toes sneakers; Jean Slabbert who wins a Super Rolling Art Centre and Leon Cloete and Ruth Cohen who each win a Sistema hamper.

magazine cape town

magazine cape town

March 2012

9

best for baby

crack the baby code Being a parent is as frustrating as it is rewarding – especially if you

She adds that these signals, together with the development of physiological maturity, which enables your baby to show pleasure by smiling at around four to six weeks, and the emotional maturity to experience separation anxiety around nine months, when the mom leaves the room for example, help to give a composite picture of your baby’s needs. “For example, babies under 12 weeks cannot laugh out loud, but they can show joy by smiling, widening their eyes, flapping their arms and kicking their legs,” she says.

t

here’s a general assumption that once you become a parent, you instinctively know what your baby wants.

Mothers are almost expected to have “superpowers” when it comes to tuning into their baby’s wants, needs and emotions. But how do you know that your baby’s crying because he’s hungry or that grimacing “smile” means she’s struggling with wind?

Coauthor of Baby Sense (Metz Press), Ann Richardson, says, “Essentially, babies can only communicate with us using body signals such as arching of the back or loss of eye contact and noises like grunting, gurgling and crying. Parents have to ‘read’ these signals to try to understand them.”

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March 2012

decoding neonate and baby emotions According to Durban-based paediatricians, Drs Ronnie and Das Pillay, physicians and the public have for years believed that a newborn baby is unable to respond emotionally to pain and pleasure. But they say, “Despite the fact that the higher brain centres in the neocortex are not yet functional, expressions of pain and pleasure; sensations of sight, hearing, smell, taste, touch and stimuli – though basic – are evident from birth.” Bonding between mom and baby happens through touch, sight and sound stimuli.

Within a month, emotional reactions are clear as the baby will show that he is upset or overwhelmed by too much or too little stimulation. “Early in the neonatal period, infants cry signals of hunger, soiled nappies or the need to be cuddled. This is often recognised by mothers as a normal cry,” says Dr Das Pillay. He adds that there are individual variations in infant cries.

“The cry of pain may be higher pitched or unvarying in pitch, which is indicative of distress. Facial grimacing, clenching of eyes and pulling of the mouth are indicative of an infant in pain. Refusing to eat and turning away may suggest problems in the mouth, throat or tummy,” he says.

But by far the most common reason why babies cry is because they are tired – especially in the first three months.

Babies sleep a lot and your baby’s sleep signals will come more often than expected, says Richardson. The “I’m tired” cry may be a chopping wail, but keeping a diary of your baby’s sleeping patterns will help you tell when your baby needs to nap. Meg Faure, the other author of Baby Sense says the following are warning signs that your baby is tired or overstimulated: sucking of hands, looking away, moaning, pushing you or toys away and arching.

magazine cape town

illustrations: shutterstock.com

can’t decipher your infant’s cries. RUWAYDAH LILLAH tries to tune in.

the Dunstan baby code

what do these signals mean?

Australian mother Priscilla Dunstan found herself in a decoding predicament when doctors told her that she needed to learn the meaning of the cries of her son, Thomas, who suffered from colic. Her immediate reaction was, “Where on earth do I learn that?” No-one could tell her how to differentiate a hungry cry from a tired cry.

Dunstan, a former mezzo-soprano who was able to hear and remember sound patterns from birth and could play the violin by two and a half, claims that all babies make a universal set of sounds within the first 12 weeks of their lives. She discovered this while listening to her son and, relying on her unique gift to interpret sound patterns, used the knowledge to develop the Dunstan Baby Language system. The universal baby sounds Priscilla identified are based on reflexes, which are the same in all newborn babies. When sound is added to these reflexes it creates five universal “words” that mothers tune into to understand their baby’s needs:

arching back You have to look at these signals in the context of what’s happening, Faure advises. “An arching back could be a sign of a number of things, but it generally means that the baby’s experiencing overall discomfort. Check when your baby is arching her back. If it’s after a feed, it could be reflux.” Faure adds that an arching back could also indicate overstimulation, especially in premature babies, or pain. head banging It could be a behavioural problem or a sign of pain from an ear infection, says Faure. Babies tend to head bang when experiencing deep pressure. grabbing ears “Look for the organic problem first, for example if it’s a sign of ear infection or if your baby is teething. However, your baby could also just be tired or discovering his ears,” Faure says. kicking legs This could be a sign of happiness and excitement as your baby explores his world.

It could also be that he is overstimulated. clenched fists This is a reflex in newborn babies and, as they get older, they generally stop clenching their fists. Clenched fists in an older baby could indicate overstimulation or that your baby is frustrated or angry. scrunched up knees When your baby’s knees are scrunched up in the foetal position, he could be looking for comfort.

Neh I’m hungry – A baby uses this sound reflex to let you know she is hungry. This sound happens when the sucking reflex is triggered and the tongue is pushed up on the roof of the mouth.

Owh I’m sleepy – The sound is similar to an audible yawn.

Heh I’m experiencing discomfort – The “heh” sound is used to communicate stress, discomfort or needing a nappy change. A baby says “heh” in response to a skin reflex, such as sweat or itchiness in the bottom.

Eairh I have lower gas – This could be flatulence or an upset tummy. Dunstan says the sound is produced when trapped air from a belch is unable to escape and then travels to the tummy where the intestinal muscles tighten and force out an air bubble. This sound often indicates that a bowel movement is in progress and the baby will bend its knees, bringing the legs toward the torso.

Eh I have gas – “Eh” means your baby needs to be burped. The eh-sound is produced when a large bubble of trapped air is stuck in the chest and the reflex is trying to free it out of the mouth.

magazine cape town

March 2012

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health

lthough lactose intolerance can cause varying degrees of discomfort, it is managaeble, says Catherine Boome, a Cape Town-based dietician.

Lactose is a type of sugar found in milk and other dairy products. Boom says an intolerance to lactose occurs when the body doesn’t make enough of the lactase enzyme to effectively digest the lactose. It is different from a milk allergy, where the immune system reacts to proteins in the milk, “presenting with typical allergic reactions”, explains Johannesburg paediatrician Dr Alison Baxter.

to normal. Babies are rarely born without the ability to produce lactase, she says.

Children will usually only show signs of the condition after the age of three. “Symptoms of lactose intolerance begin 30 minutes to two hours after drinking or eating foods that contain lactose,” advises Boome. These can range from mild to severe and may include nausea, stomach cramps, bloating and gas. “Sometimes people may vomit, but more frequently they have loose, frothy stools,” adds Baxter.

testing cause and effect “Primary lactose intolerance can occur naturally as part of the ageing process, as adults lose some degree of lactase activity after puberty,” says Boome. Children are more likely to develop secondary lactose intolerance. This is often because of an infection like gastroenteritis, where diarrhoea causes a loss of the lactase enzyme in the gut, says Baxter. Boome explains that lactase develops fully in foetuses in the third trimester, so premature babies may have reduced lactase. This can cause transient lactose intolerance. However, these enzymes generally return

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March 2012

Baxter uses a stool acidity test for babies and young children. The liquid part of the stool is tested to find reducing substances, or sugars that have not been properly absorbed, and the results are quantified so that the doctor can gauge the severity of the intolerance.

Other tests include the lactose-tolerance test and hydrogen breath test. In both, a high level lactose drink is taken. The first tests the glucose in the blood to see if the body absorbs and digests lactose. The second tests the amount of hydrogen in the breath, which will be greater for lactose-intolerant people. “The tests may be dangerous

for infants and children who can’t tolerate high levels of lactose,” says Boome.

managing it Baxter says lactose intolerance in premature babies is not a major concern as feeding is introduced slowly.

For breast-feeding lactose-intolerant babies, Baxter recommends eliminating lactose from your diet. If your baby is still uncomfortable, try alternating feeds of breast milk with lactose-free formula. If you have taken your baby off lactose, try introducing it again at around three months, says Baxter. Babies on lactose-free formula will still get the right vitamins and minerals. However, you should consult your paediatrician before making any changes.

For children, try limiting the amount of lactose in their diet. If you have completely excluded dairy products from their diet, they may not be getting sufficient vitamin D and B12, calcium, phosphorous, riboflavin, pantothenic acid, protein or potassium. “These nutrients must be obtained from other foods and supplements,” says Boome. A dietician or paediatrician would be able to assess your child’s diet and recommend supplements if necessary.

magazine cape town

PHOTOGRAPH: shutterstock.com

a

If milk turns your stomach, you may be lactose intolerant. By TAMLYN VINCENT

upfront with paul

food for thought Control your children’s need for nuggets, and other food fetishes, by encouraging them to eat a varied diet. By PAUL KERTON

y

PHOTOGRAPH: MARIETTE BARKHUIZEN

Saskia, Paul and Sabina

ou might have missed that shocking story about British teenager Stacey Irvine, who has lived on a diet of McDonalds chicken nuggets since she was a toddler and has never tasted fruit or fresh vegetables. Well, surprise, surprise, she collapsed and was rushed to hospital after struggling to breathe, and was promptly told by doctors to “change your appalling diet or die”.

A 20-piece portion of McNuggets contains 58g of fat and 926 calories, which exceeds the daily recommended 56g fat allowance and is almost half an adult’s required 2 000 calories a day. Dieticians do concede that “nuggets and chips provide sufficient calories and vitamin C levels for a teenager but…”, and here is the

magazine cape town

zinger, “… vital nutrients responsible for the skin, eyes, bone health and immunity are practically nonexistent”.

So why am I telling you all of this?

Because, fellow caring parent, all our children go through food fads. I know of children that only eat fish fingers, scrambled eggy-weggy or cereal, and it is very easy to slip into the habit of always giving them their favourite food. It prevents conflict and, if their chosen meal is pasta, the one-pot cooking means it’s easy to make. But we need to ensure that a temporary diet fad does not become a long-term obsession.

Both my children are proud pasta maniacs, which is good and bad. Good, because this pasta diet has helped keep them slim, as pasta-eating supermodels

such as Cindy Crawford, have also testified to at some point, but bad, because eating a monotonous diet of any kind will neglect the essential goodies needed for healthy development.

At home we try and maintain a nutritional balance, but children, even your own children, can lie about their food intake.

We’ll ask: “Have you had pasta already today?” Their reply: an emphatic “No”.

“What did you have for lunch?” The answer: a hesitant “Er…” “Was it made in Italy, dirty yellow in colour, hard before you boiled it and served with olive oil, pesto and Parmesan?”

Answer: “I think so.” “Well, that is pasta, so no more for you today, my darling.”

The recommended meat and two veg combo is an effort to cook, and also to eat, as you need to sit upright at a table, on a chair, using a knife and fork and most likely, you’ll be away from the TV. Insist that your children sit at a table to eat, and

maybe, communicate with the family. Yes, children can eat a hot dog upside down while abusing the couch in front of the TV, if you let them. But if that’s how they eat every meal they will have the table manners of an orang-utan.

Luckily, while food fads might annoy you, as the parent, they will shift and change as your children get older. Cook as a family, let them plan meals and make food something to enjoy on a social, as much as a nutritional, level. Keep offering them new things to try from an early age, even if they claim to hate it. One day they will change their minds as they appreciate that new flavours and textures can be exciting to eat. They will suddenly start adding new foods without you even knowing, thanks to sampling at birthday parties or at school, and peer pressure to eat different things. Just keep an eye on those food obsessions.

Paul Kerton is the author of Fab Dad 2: from walking to talking… and beyond.

March 2012

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dealing with difference

techno tools Technology can open up the world for children with different needs, says JACQUI TOOKE.

m

y five-year-old son’s face is alight with that wonderful mix of concentration and the joy of achieving. Matt is doing a puzzle on his iPad. Using one finger, he slides the puzzle pieces into place with great ease, showing that his mind can see exactly where the pieces should go. Matt has a rare genetic syndrome that results in global developmental delay with fine motor and speech difficulties. He enjoys doing real puzzles, but his hands often let him down. Sometimes it takes him five or six frustrated attempts before he eventually gets the piece in place. That’s

adding any number of pictures, uploading personal photos, and categorising them in different ways to make it easy to navigate.

It’s simple to programme and allows the user to put together whole sentences. Now anyone can understand Matt.

Hansford has also seen the positive benefits of using a tablet computer with a young girl who has severe athetoid cerebral palsy. Let’s call her Katie to respect her privacy. Katie has the potential to learn, but her physical challenges make it hard for her to function independently and she requires physical support for most daily activities. It was Katie’s speech therapist,

As with all tools, they are only as effective as the person who handles them.

just a click away We bought Matt an iPad to support his communication efforts, but you can use any of the other tablet computers that are available, such as the Blackberry Playbook or Android devices. When Matt was four years old, his receptive language was far more advanced than his expressive language. He was mostly unable to speak, but could communicate using some signs. Although our family understood his signing, most other people did not. This is where the iPad has proved useful. Coupled with the augmentative communication application, Proloquo2go, it functions as a speech-generating device.

But, unlike other communication devices, it is significantly cheaper and more versatile.

As Matt presses a picture on the screen, the iPad speaks that word aloud, enabling him to communicate his thoughts and express his needs. One can customise by

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Deborah Stodel, who introduced her to the iPad. Initially Katie was scared by its bright lights and sounds. Stodel helped desensitise her to this sensory input and now she uses it for reading, drawing, spelling, piano playing, problem solving and listening to music. “Katie delights in being able to achieve ‘pen and paper tasks’ with ease, accuracy and speed for the first time in her life,” explains Hansford.

“The iPad is supporting transformational change in her daily life. For example, she no longer expresses her needs by issuing short, gruff demands, but is now able to frame polite requests.”

benefits and limits Tablets are easy to handle, which motivates children like Matt and Katie to participate in the learning process.

When it’s difficult to move your body, you are often reliant on others choosing your activities for you. With the tablet being so simple to manipulate, children can choose which application they want to use, giving them control over their own journey of exploration and learning.

Adults with disabilities are also taking advantage of the potential that this technology offers. Cape Town mother Lynda Heyneke has a visual impairment which makes reading almost impossible.

One of her great sadnesses is that she can’t read a bedtime story to her young son, something that she feels deepens magazine cape town

PHOTOGRAPH: shutterstock.com

a whole lot of effort for one successful puzzle piece placement. But the iPad offers him movement at a flick of his finger, allowing him to achieve tasks free from the limitations of his fine motor difficulties. As Matt’s physiotherapist, Pamela Hansford, explains, “The iPad is an exciting tool which puts ‘fun’ into ‘function’ as it reduces the effort required for a task while increasing the success rate.” Children need to experience success to confidently engage with the world around them.

the intimacy in a parent-child relationship.

Technology has offered her a solution.

Lynda has downloaded books that can be read aloud. Now the two of them cuddle on his bed, the iPad on her lap reading a story aloud on her behalf, her little boy loving the pictures and hearing the words and enjoying the warm company of his mom – a precious human interaction that has been made possible through this technology.

Stodel has integrated technology into her work with children with autism, Down’s syndrome, learning difficulties and other developmental problems. She loves how user-friendly tablet computers are and how highly motivating it is for children to learn using these gadgets. One can download thousands of applications, many of which are free, so there is something for everyone.

Although she thoroughly recommends it as a therapeutic tool and an educational device, she offers some cautions. Some children become so engrossed with the tablet in their hands that they make less eye contact and engage less with people, which is counter-productive in children with autism who struggle with relating.

Other children with obsessive-compulsive

tendencies may become fixated with it, throwing tantrums when encouraged to engage in other activities. There have been some articles claiming that these computers work miracles, but Stodel brings perspective by reminding us that, as with all tools, they are only as effective as the person who handles them. Similarly, they only become remarkable empowering tools when the child’s team of parents, therapists and teachers facilitate it well. A helpful hint Stodel offers is that one should ensure that the applications are in line with the child’s developmental goals, thereby providing enough challenge so as not to be boring, but not too difficult so that there is no chance of success.

What is so meaningful for us as parents is that, through Matt’s interactions with the iPad, we are able to see what he is indeed capable of. Before, when he was trapped by the limitations of his body, we would only see glimpses of Matt’s potential. The iPad removes the confines of hands and a mouth that just won’t do what he wants them to, and allows him to show us how much he really understands. As much as Matt loves the ability to achieve, we love being surprised by his achievements.

apps that Matt likes Downloaded from the South African App Store: apple.com/za/mac/app-store Puzzles: happyKids animal puzzles (by Norman Snyder); Puzzle Pals (by BigStack Studios) Drawing: Hello Crayons (by Raysoft Co.); Drawing Den (by Applied Phasor); Glow Paint (by Limit Point Software) Numbers and Counting: Swim with Numbers (by redbytes software) Letters and Words: Little Reader (by BrillKids); ABC GoGo (by FunfunSoft); Magnetic Board (by Dragonflies Unlimited) Colours: Color Monster (by Wombi) Shapes: Toddler Puzzle Shapes (by Technolio Inc) Communication: Proloquo2go (by AssistiveWare)

helpful resources SNAP (Special Needs Adapted Program) has produced a “how to” guide for parents on using the iPad, including reviews of a number of applications. Cost: R35. Contact: 021 975 7224 or visit snap.org.za websites netbuddy.org.uk has tips for computer gaming momswithapps.com has a specific page on apps for children with special needs snapps4kids.com

magazine cape town

March 2012

15

parenting

holiday without the hassle CHRISTINA CASTLE offers 10 tips for a stress-free family getaway.

1 make a plan

2 switch off

While the memory of spontaneously

That means your cellphone, laptop, iPad, alarm clock and anything else that connects you to the world. Switching off means time-out from everyday life. Focus on downtime, grabbing afternoon snoozes and catching up with family. Sure, it may take a couple of days to really unwind and stop checking those work emails, but there’s nothing better than surrendering to a holiday. You deserve it.

wandering the world with a backpack may not seem too distant, doing it with children in tow can cause a few anxieties. So, whether you are camping it or fivestarring it, map out your holiday with their help. Researching it together on the internet is a great way to ensure you are all on the same page and have similar holiday expectations. Book ahead for activities and accommodation.

This prevents disappointment and grumpy fellow travellers. These days everything can be booked online, from flights and hotels to restaurants, and doing so gives you more time to explore, relax and pretend you are a backpacker again.

3 expect the unexpected

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4 get real

5 keep it simple

We all go on holiday with great intentions and expectations.

I usually plan to read my camera’s instructions, refine my photographic skills and produce award-winning shots when I go away. My husband always says he’s going to teach the boys how to fish and feed the family for the time we are away (ja, right). Horse riding on the beach, climbing Table Mountain, cooking lessons with locals – no matter how keen you are to get out and do everything, you have to get real and realise that you are on holiday, and some of that time can be spent doing, (dare I say it?), absolutely nothing.

These three words you really need to hang on to, whether you are heading for a globetrotting marathon or escaping to the coast.

Nobody wins awards for how many kilometres they cover or how many activities they cram into a day.

While you may be heading to a destination with a million things to add to the “to-do” list, make sure you prioritise. Not only can all these activities break the bank, they can break the holiday mood and send you home feeling more exhausted than when you left. Discuss activities with the family and make a democratic call on which ones you are going to pursue.

magazine cape town

PHOTOGRAPHS: shutterstock.com

No holiday will ever go according to plan. I often think of the poor tourists who visit Cape Town and are unable to get to the top of Table Mountain because of bad weather. You may experience things such as flight delays, road works, mechanical problems and poor navigation. “It’s all part of the adventure,” I said to the boys on a recent trip to Australia. Our plane was delayed due to technical problems and we spent our first night on holiday in a sad little hotel in Benoni. At least we managed to get a glimpse of the place Charlize Theron calls home.

6 medically speaking This is where I shift from Type B personality into Type A in the blink of an eye. One of my pet fears is being caught in a remote location without appropriate medication, so my holiday first-aid kit is packed before we have even decided to go on holiday. The thought of being caught in the middle of the Zambezi with a runny tummy and no remedy or toilet paper is enough to make me nauseous. My son’s asthma pumps are strategically placed in all luggage. So too are sunscreen, painkillers and plasters. Call me a pharmacy on safari, but I feel secure knowing that whatever the ailment, we can pretty much deal with it.

7 set a few boundaries Just because you’re on holiday doesn’t mean rules and routine go out the window. While we may thrive on being out of our comfort zones in new and exciting places, our children still need to feel safe within a system that they know, respect and love. Breakfast time is still breakfast time; sleep time is still sleep time. But don’t beat yourself up if these times get a little stretched. You’re on holiday after all.

8 don’t go it alone Admit it: how often have you returned from holiday in need of another one? This defeats the purpose of a getaway altogether.

The planning, preparation and execution of a trip is hard work.

Share the love and the limelight by letting someone else take responsibility for organising a meal, suggesting the odd activity or hunting for accommodation.

Sometimes just being able to hand over the reins of responsibility is all the respite you need to recharge those batteries. You’ll be amazed at the eager hands just waiting to take over.

9 pack right Don’t overdo it, but don’t under do it. Coming short of clean undies on a camping trip is no joke. Neither is rocking up in a cold spot shy of a few jerseys. While you don’t want to pack your entire wardrobe, you do need to be in the know as to exactly what is required.

There are some great international weather sites that can give you an idea of what to pack. You need to be ruthless, yet realistic – like no heels in Namibia and an extra bikini in Mauritius. And always, always, throw in an extra pair of undies for each member of the family (it’s a very welcome surprise just when you think you’re clean out). While we love handing over the responsibility of packing to our older children, just give their bag a quick once over before you zip up.

10 home sweet home The last thing I need when I am away is a call to say that something has gone wrong at home. We once spent a three-week holiday away only to arrive home to discover the electricity had tripped and recently bought seafood had defrosted and drained from the freezer, leaking into every carpet in the house. Yes, we should have had an idea of the problem when the neighbours called every day to say our alarm was going off.

Find a house-sitter, dog-sitter or at least someone you can trust to keep an eye on the place while you are away. It saves you the worry, creates an impression that your house isn’t empty and is worth every cent.

magazine cape town

March 2012

17

parenting

spare the rod Is a quick smack a suitable form of punishment, or should any form of hitting be avoided?

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lthough many of us may have felt the urge to smack when provoked beyond endurance, an increasing number of parents make the ideological decision that this form of punishment is not appropriate. Are they correct, and is smacking likely to lead to horrible consequences?

Rachel Ferriman, 35, lives in Randburg, and is a stay-at-home mother to three children, aged six, four and two. She says, “Smacking is effective before children can talk or understand abstract concepts clearly. A smack is designed to redirect a child’s action. The first time I smacked my first-born, he was about 10 months old. I was changing his nappy on white bedding, and he was trying to move away from me. Of course, I’m entirely to blame for

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the situation – I definitely should not have changed him there. But it was too late, and a quick, sharp smack stopped him in his tracks. From then on he usually lay still when I changed him and because I wasn’t trying to stop him turning and escaping, I could be calm and tender with him, which we both enjoyed. I would have thought it was too early to smack a child – before his first birthday – but it wasn’t.”

Cape Town writer Penny*, 39, has one son, aged three-and-a-half, whom she has smacked on a few occasions. “Smacking is justified when a child is not in a correct mindset to think about what he is doing – for example, the child believes the activity is fun, or he is in the middle of a tantrum, or he is being purposefully defiant.”

magazine cape town

PHOTOGRAPHS AND ILLUSTRATION: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM

LISA LAZARUS investigates.

Under such circumstances, she feels it is beneficial to associate a danger with a short, sharp (non-lasting) pain, coupled with a stern rebuke from a loving parent. “It provides an effective deterrent for children who are not old enough to understand the consequences of their actions, or the concept of danger,” she explains.

But educational psychologist and founder of the Bella Vida Centre in Johannesburg, Ilze van der Merwe-Alberts, does not support the smacking of a child of any age. “There are better ways to discipline children,” she says. “Also, it teaches children double standards, because you’re saying that they can’t smack another child, but that it’s okay for an adult to smack. This is confusing for a child.”

Dominique Phohleli, 37, from Fourways, is the mother of two children, aged seven and 11. When her son was five years old, he went around his aftercare swearing at the other children, using offensive language he had picked up from a friend. “The next day I made him apologise to each child and to the teacher as well. It was a difficult thing for him to do,” she says. “He resisted, but I insisted. It was hard for me too, because I felt humiliated at the way

magazine cape town

he had behaved. I don’t believe a hiding would have been half as effective.”

Even though she was smacked as a child, not regularly, but on occasion, Dominique doesn’t think it had any effect on how she made decisions, except to show her that this is not an effective form of discipline. This is a somewhat unusual response, as discipline strategies are fairly

Newsweek’s blog reports on an American population study by Dr Marjorie Gunnoe, a professor of psychology at Calvin College, Michigan. In this ongoing study, adults and their teenage children are interviewed every three years, over a 20-year period. Almost a quarter of these adolescents claim that they were never smacked. Those who were smacked as young children, between the

There are better ways to discipline children… also, it teaches children double standards. likely to pass from one generation to the next. A 2003 study in the Journal of Family Psychology indicated that adolescents’ approval of smacking was highly likely if they themselves were hit as young children.

be consistent Surprisingly, there is little research that compares children who have been smacked with those who haven’t. It’s probably because most children have been smacked at least once in their lives.

However, as a parenting style of no-hitting gains popularity, new evidence is starting to emerge, and the results are intriguing.

ages of two and six, were doing better as teenagers across a number of outcomes, including academic rank, volunteer work, tertiary aspiration and hope for the future.

Po Bronson, co-author of a parenting research book NurtureShock (Twelve Publishers), hypothesises that the lack of consistency when it comes to disciplining, whether you’re a smacker or not, is at the heart of the problems. “My thoughts jump immediately to the work of Dr Sarah Schoppe-Sullivan, a professor of human development and family science, (who) found that children of progressive dads were acting out more in school. This

the current debate Proposed changes to the Children’s Act could make it illegal for you to smack your child. Although the Schools Act of 1996 has banned corporal punishment in the classroom, there is no legislation stopping parents from hitting their children at home. A Western Cape lobby group, the Children’s Rights Project, wants this to change, and has asked the Department of Social Development to ban the practice as it considers amendments to the Children’s Act. Their submission will be considered by the department in May. There are concerns that a blanket ban on spanking would turn parents into criminals if they disciplined their children. It would also be difficult to police.

But some children’s rights groups maintain that the new legislation will protect children from abuse.

Several countries, including Kenya, Sweden, Finland and Germany, have banned corporal punishment in the home.

March 2012

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parenting

was likely because the fathers were inconsistent disciplinarians; they were emotionally uncertain about when and how to punish, and thus they were reinventing the wheel every time they had to reprimand their child. In other words, spanking regularly isn’t the problem; the problem is having no regular form of discipline at all.”

Cape Town-based clinical psychologist Emilita Pecego supports Bronson’s interpretation. “I think those children who were smacked and did well, did so not as a result of the physical punishment that they received, but because they had parents who responded to them consistently.

No response or discipline is probably more harmful to children than a ‘mild’ smack, which is then followed by a loving response, such as a hug.”

behaviour tends to reduce the incidence of bad behaviour,” she says. She doesn’t smack her children, because she believes it doesn’t teach them anything valuable in the long term. “This is a difficult thing for me to admit,” she says, “but if I’m honest with myself, I know the times I’ve been sorely tempted to give a smack were more about me looking for an outlet for my anger rather than an attempt to teach my child something about his behaviour.”

Pecego states that parents often smack when they’re feeling overwhelmed by their feelings of anger or frustration. Although she acknowledges the acceptability of these feelings, their physical expression should try to be avoided. “Particularly in a South African context with its high levels of personal trauma and public violence,

No response or discipline is probably more harmful to children than a ‘mild’ smack, which is then followed by a loving response, such as a hug.

Yet, Pecego does not support smacking as a means of disciplining a child. She states, “I believe that it is preferable to set limits in non-violent ways, as this preserves the integrity and respect within the parent-child relationship.”

effects of smacking Gunnoe’s research also looked at the effects of smacking older children. Those who experienced their last smack between the ages of seven and 11 were slightly worse off on negative outcomes when compared with the never-been-smacked, but a tad better when it came to the positive outcomes. However, adolescents who were still being smacked were always worse off, and clearly exhibited problems.

Van der Merwe-Alberts has the following advice if a parent decides to use smacking as a form of discipline: • Don’t smack in anger.

• Make sure your child knows you’re going to smack so there are no big surprises.

• Remain under control.

• Discuss afterwards why the child was smacked.

• Reassure the child of your love.

consequences, not punishments For Dominique, an important part of child rearing involves praise for good behaviour.

“Star charts or keeping track of good

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March 2012

parents need to support (and receive support) in fostering a safe and violencefree society,” she says.

So what does Pecego propose as an alternative? “It’s absolutely vital for parents to set limits or boundaries for their children,” she says. “I think that the lack of a parental response – in other words, no boundaries – or the inconsistent implementation of boundaries, leaves a child confused about what behaviour is acceptable. Also, the value of a boundary, that it can be very helpful for protecting oneself and others, is not learnt.”

If these boundaries are transgressed, then there must be consequences.

“Consequences rather than punishments, especially physical punishments for inappropriate behaviour, fit more naturally with how life works. For example, if you refuse to share with friends, they may stop playing with you. The way consequences are enforced should be adapted to the age of the child.”

Parenting is sometimes like a complex strategy game, where you need be patient but firm, wily yet humorous. And the end result takes years, even decades, to emerge. But, ultimately, helping a new life manoeuvre competently through the world is surely a challenge worth working at. * Name has been changed. magazine cape town

age-appropriate discipline babies • Discipline cannot be enforced, but it is important to respond consistently, according to the needs of your baby. young toddlers – one to three years old • Apply consequences in a practical way through your actions, and with the understanding that the toddler may not fully understand that his behaviour is a problem.

• Use distraction. Try and interest the child in something else, or remove a dangerous object and verbalise why you are doing this – “I’m taking the fork away, because it can hurt you.” preschool – from three years old • Children have the beginning of a sense of right and wrong, even if they don’t always understand why certain behaviour is inappropriate.

• State the problem. Say, “You are jumping on the couch and that is not allowed, please stop.” If the child does not listen, tell her she will have a time-out.

• Always implement your threat.

• One minute of time-out per year of child’s age.

• Educational psychologist, Ilze van der MerweAlberts, recommends the following approach for children over the age of two: when you, as the parent, have made a decision, give the child a choice of two ways of executing that decision. For example, at bath time, the child is given the choice of running to the bathroom either as a racing car or a racing horse. The advantages are that you’re using the child’s language of play, and allowing the child some choice, while still retaining the ultimate parental control. primary school • At times, allow natural consequences to take their course. For example, if the child does not do his homework, then he will have to face the consequences at school. Don’t step in and “save” your child.

• Consequences like no TV or no pocket money would be appropriate, but it does depend on the particular activities that the child enjoys. teenagers • It is important for parents and teenagers to reach some agreement on appropriate and inappropriate ways of behaving, and then to negotiate the consequences for lack of compliance.

• The challenge for this age group is to develop a sense of autonomy and identity, and to begin the process of separating from the parents. Therefore, a more collaborative approach is better.

• The effects of not responding or responding inconsistently at this stage can be serious.

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magazine cape town

March 2012

21

advertorial

getaway

a river SUE SEGAR and her family spend a weekend doing the magical Whiskey Creek Canoe Trail on the Keurbooms River outside Plettenberg Bay.

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he comments in the visitors’ book of our remote log cabin on the bank of the Keurbooms River said: “Animals we saw include puff adder, scorpions, spiders and the house snake” and “Paddle further upstream and you will find some White Nile water”. The children, intrigued, were reading the book aloud after arriving at the overnight hut tucked in a forest above the river, the final destination on Cape Nature’s Whiskey Creek Canoe Trail. We’d just arrived – two parents, two children and their vegan godmother – after a 7km

time, but wanted to wait until the children were ready. Now, with a successful Whale Trail behind them and a childhood of holidays spent paddling on the Duiwenhoks River, I was confident that they were up to it.

We left on a Friday straight after school and, to break the trip, spent the night in Bonnnievale at one of the country’s only persimmon farms. Early the next morning, we took a back route through the Bonnievale valley, which was a treat in itself, to Swellendam and back on to the N2 heading for Plett.

From top to bottom: Saskia in her helmet, ready for the river; Dad (Martin) hauls his canoe over the shallow rapid; Tom gets to know his boat.

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paddle up the whiskey-coloured river, starting at the river mouth just outside Plettenberg Bay, and winding through beautiful high gorges and forests of keurboom (the signature tree in this area), stinkwood, yellowwood and Cape beech.

We were there because we wanted to have an adventure with our children, something that could be done over a weekend. It had to be a challenge, but nothing too dangerous – a mini Survivor weekend of sorts. We had been in that jaded family space that comes from just one weekend too many in the city. Saskia, 11, needed a break from soil erosion projects, music exams and pre-teenage girl politics. Tom, nine, just needed to do something exciting out of The Dangerous Book for Boys. As a great fan of Cape Nature – at the beginning of every year, I park myself in their head office and make four or five bookings in different spots for the family – I’d had my eye on the canoe trail for some

Part of the fun of planning the trip was the “sight unseen” factor, as we had not been up the river before and we had no clue what our canoes would look like. But the challenge that preoccupied me most, while planning the trip into relatively unknown territory, was how to feed the delightful, but determinedly vegan, godmother. Especially as all the clothes, sleeping equipment and food for two nights had to be squeezed into the hulls of three canoes (this was a safari into Africa, minus the bearers).

Once there, we related to another comment in the visitor’s book: “Incredible location. Our second visit. The first time we turned back because we couldn’t find the hut.” Having packed everything into the canoes, making space for the quinoa, the avos and cannellini beans for the VG, we paddled for about three hours upriver, stopping on the bank for a picnic of smoked mussels and crackers as storm clouds gathered above us, ready to burst.

magazine cape town

illustrations: shutterstock.com / Photographs: robyn rorke

We had been in that jaded family space that comes from just one weekend too many in the city.

Far left: The deck of the log cabins; Left: The view during our stay; Top: The bunk beds inside our cabin; Bottom left: The family prepares for the second day on the river.

At first, we were shockingly incapable of paddling a straight course, veering either left or right and into the reed beds on the shore. But after a while, we realised it makes a difference whether one is aiming the front or rear end forward.

The first 4km were festive, with occasional picknickers and people on powerboats waving at us; the latter creating exciting waves to paddle through. Then things quietened down, as motor boats are not allowed beyond a certain point upriver, and the river became more tranquil, the birds more plentiful and the weather more overcast. Birds in these parts include the Knysna Loerie and Woodpecker, Malachite Sunbird, Giant Kingfisher, African Fish Eagle, as well as various sunbirds and numerous others. A pair of Egyptian geese, with five goslings bobbing behind them, kept us company for a little while. We loved the serenity of the second half of the trail, with the steep, wooded slopes rising on either side of the broad, gentle river.

About three hours from the start, we reached a narrow section of the river. The fast rapids in the shallow water prevented us from paddling any further so we pulled the canoes over the brown stones and to the side of the river. It took quite a while of strolling up and down the sandy bank before we spied a tiny path winding into the bush and to our hut, the Whiskey Creek Log Cabin.

The children yelped in delight as they ran up the stairs of the golden pine house, which is set on stilts (to accommodate the occasional flood) in the dense riverfront shrubbery, backed by giant indigenous trees. With its fireplace on the wide verandah and an open air kitchen and eating area that looks out onto the river, the house is great for a sociable group of people. The sleeping area is a spacious

travel tips

single room, with four bunk beds and two single beds. We lit a fire and ate supper under the stars before the children managed to talk their godmother into sleeping on the deck.

Most visitors paddle back downstream after only one night; we decided to stay for an extra day in the wild, doing nothing except maybe lying on the deck reading. We packed a picnic and spent most of the day wading and swimming upriver. It’s absolutely essential to wear shoes in this river as the stones are very hard on the feet. It was idyllic to swim in the warm water and walk in the sun with the sound of the birds and the gurgle of water over the river stones.

The children and their godmother walked further than we did, in search of the “Nile’s white water”. About 20 minutes later, screams of excitement and delight wafted down the river and we knew they had found something that met their expectations. That night, with the children asleep again under the stars, my husband said to me, “Everyone’s gone in for glamour lodges. They have forgotten about nature and the holiday huts in the wild that abound and which give double the reward at a tenth of the price.”

• The Keurbooms River Nature Reserve is situated about 8km past Plettenberg Bay on the N2 towards Port Elizabeth.

• You must arrive at the gate by 3:30pm to depart no later than 4pm for the trail.

• The trail is limited to 10 people for the overnight hut. Canoes, as well as the compulsory helmets and life jackets, are included in the trail and accommodation tariff. Waterproof shoes with grip soles are essential.

• The dorm-like bedroom contains four double bunks and two single beds. Each bed is supplied with a mattress with cover, pillow and pillow slip.

• The kitchen has a gas stove, fridge, crockery, cutlery and fresh rain water.

• Electricity is supplied via solar power so the optimal functioning of the geyser, lights and freezer cannot be guaranteed.

• A braai grid and black pot are supplied.

Braai wood is sold at the security gate.

• Take food, towels, sleeping bags, bedding and fire lighters, torches and matches.

For more information on the Keurbooms River Nature Reserve: visit capenature.co.za

Bushmanskloof

magazine cape town

March 2012

25

parenting

stand by me Most children naturally gravitate towards each other, but what if your child is struggling to make friends? By VANESSA PAPAS

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he process of socialisation begins at birth and it all starts with you – the parent. You are your child’s first connection to other people; their first friend.

Through their interaction with you, your child will gradually become familiar with others and learn to enjoy their company too.

“The first five years are critical in the development of your child’s social skills,” says Johannesburg-based primary school teacher, Charmaine Teixeira. “During the first year, a child’s primary focus is on discovering his physical capabilities, such as learning to crawl or walk, picking up things and throwing them. They also learn to interact with their parents and siblings.

At around the age of two, children begin to enjoy playing with others. Play becomes

from observing modelled behaviour and through interacting with their peers. When they learn how to empathise with others and how much fun it is to interact with others, they start developing true and lasting friendships.”

Shantal Singh, a clinical psychologist in Durban, says, “Playing with other children helps your child develop communication skills, assists in establishing social maturity, by engaging in activities and respecting the rules of games played between children and it encourages comparative development. Through playing, children are able to form positive relationships with others and this in turn establishes security in the development of positive relationships when they become adults.”

When they learn how to empathise with others and how much fun it is to interact with others, they start developing true and lasting friendships.

socialising Teixeira explains that socialisation involves the acceptance of others and in turn being accepted by others. “Learning to socialise with others is a process of trial and error.

At first, a young child will not be willing to share their toys but with encouragement from their parents and teacher, they will learn that the best way to make a friend is to be a friend. By the age of three, children are well on their way to making real friends.”

Successful socialisation also depends on how much exposure your child has to other children. “If your child spends the bulk of their time in the company of adults, they will find it difficult to relate to children their age,” she says. “In order to thrive, children need to also spend time with other children. They learn a tremendous amount

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March 2012

friendship problems If your child is battling to make friends, understanding their personal circumstances, level of emotional maturity and social context could help unravel the reasons. Singh says, “Maybe you’ve moved to a new neighbourhood, or your child has changed schools, or they’re trying to cope with an emotional stressor such as bereavement or separation from a parent.

Love your child enough to communicate with them in an open and trusting manner.

If you are concerned that your child is not making friends, discuss the issue with them instead of making assumptions as to why they can’t make friends. By finding out whether something in particular is making your child withdraw, you can work on the problem together.”

Cape Town-based counselling psychologist and teacher Kerry Acheson says that while factors in your child’s life can play a role in how easily they make friends, it’s also important to recognise that all children are different and they have unique personalities. “Children who are naturally spontaneous and outgoing will generally make friends more readily than children who are naturally more reserved or shy. Some children are simply more magazine cape town

PHOTOGRAPH: shutterstock.com

a critical area of learning and developing acceptable social skills. Initially, children play alongside one another. This is called ‘parallel play’. They may be in close proximity, but their play is individual. As they get older and become more curious about what the other children are doing, they learn to play interactively. They may integrate into the other child’s games, or they may allow others to integrate into their own games.”

comfortable with one very familiar friend than with socialising in a group. Some children who have had painful experiences, such as bullying or rejection, may avoid risking future pain by sticking to themselves and not making attempts to make friends.

Some simply lack the social skills necessary in order to facilitate effective friendshipmaking due to the lack of opportunities for socialising, as is sometimes the case with an only child.

The key is not to put too much pressure on your child but rather to provide them with opportunities to engage with other children, and encourage them to be more social.”

Invite friends from your child’s class for play dates. Start with one-on-one play dates rather than groups. Enrol them in extramural or co-curricular activities that they show an interest in. This gives your child a chance to develop an interest they have in common with others and often leads to the building of lasting friendships.

Collaborate with your child’s teacher, as they can be your child’s ally in this area. In cases where the child’s social difficulties are marked, a social worker or psychologist can assess and provide play therapy in order to help support friendship-making skills.

a need to belong When it comes to older children between the ages of 10 and 12, and teenagers,

having friends becomes even more crucial.

“This age group has a strong desire to ‘belong’ and their social development becomes characterised by an increasing need to be involved with friends,” says Dale Davidson, a Durban-based clinical psychologist. “Close friendships help them cope with the stressors of adolescence, such as physical development, school life, issues with parents and relationships.”

Should your older child be battling to make friends, Davidson says a great way of helping them along is encouraging them to play sport. “Sport involvement is an excellent way for them to make friends, or widen their social circle. It also reduces stress, depression and anxiety and helps youngsters cope better with the challenges of adolescence.”

At times, there may be more serious, clinical reasons why your older child may be socially withdrawn and struggle, or not want to make friends. “A sudden change in behaviour is often indicative of some form of emotional struggle they may be experiencing. Genetic vulnerabilities and environmental factors may result in the development of psychological disorders such as depression, bipolar disorder and anxiety, all of which need to be treated and managed by the appropriate health care provider, such as a doctor, psychologist or psychiatrist,” says Davidson.

how you can help • Make sure your child feels nurtured, valued and supported in the family. Model good social skills and maintain a consistent and positive atmosphere at home.

• Teaching your child respect and appropriate manners often lays the platform for social engagement.

• Praise and encouragement instils confidence and a sense of competence in your child. Work with their teacher to help your child develop self-confidence.

A confident child is more likely to try and make friends.

• Teach your child conversation skills, such as listening without interrupting, and how to greet people appropriately. Develop your child’s empathy by asking, “how would you feel if...”.

• Practise social skills in role-playing, or by playing with dolls.

• Encouraging your older child or teenager to take up a sport is an excellent way to help them make friends.

• A social worker or psychologist can assess and provide play therapy to help support friendship-making skills.

• Remind them that friendship is about more than just adding a new friend on Facebook or MXit. It involves respect, compassion and face-to-face time.

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book extract

get your paws sticky The whole family will love experimenting with these recipes inspired by Paddington, the much-loved bear from the popular children’s books.

croque monsieur Serves 2

You will need: • Cheese grater • Chopping board • Knife for buttering • Small saucepan • Tablespoon • Wooden spoon • Frying pan • Fish slice

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Ingredients: • 75g Gruyère cheese • 60g butter, softened • 4 thick slices white bread • 15g plain flour • 100ml whole milk • 1 egg yolk • 1 tablespoon Dijon mustard • 4 slices good quality ham

What to do: • Grate the cheese.

• Butter the bread, using 20g or a third of the block of butter, and put the slices on a board, buttered side down.

• Melt the rest of the butter in the saucepan over a medium heat and add the flour. Stir with the wooden spoon for a couple of minutes until well mixed, then add the milk gradually, stirring all the time, until the mixture is thick and smooth.

• Take the saucepan off the heat and stir in the egg yolk, the mustard and the grated cheese. Beat the sauce with the spoon until the cheese has melted.

• Spread the cheese mixture on two slices of the bread waiting on the board. Fold the ham and put two slices on each of the cheese-sauce-covered slices. Put the remaining two slices of bread on top of each of the cheese and ham slices (butter side up) and press down softly.

• Heat a frying pan over a medium heat and cook the sandwiches for about three minutes on each side until they are crisp and golden. (Because they are buttered, you don’t need any fat or oil.)

• Using the fish slice, take them out of the pan, cut into halves diagonally and serve at once.

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sweetcorn fritters Serves 2–4

You will need: • Large bowl • Sieve • Kitchen roll • Measuring jug • Tablespoon • Whisk (hand or electric) • Frying pan • Fish slice

Ingredients: • 100g plain flour • 1 tbsp baking powder • Salt and pepper • 1 large egg • 150ml milk • 200g tinned sweetcorn kernels • 2 tbsp vegetable oil

What to do: • Sift the flour, baking powder and a good pinch of salt and pepper into the bowl.

• Make a well in the centre, add the egg and gradually beat in the milk with a whisk to form a smooth batter.

• Drain the sweetcorn kernels thoroughly. (Patting it with kitchen roll is a good idea – it stops extra liquid diluting the batter.) Add the kernels to the batter mix.

• Heat the vegetable oil in the frying pan over a medium heat. Fry dollops (about two tablespoons) of the mixture for two minutes or so on each side until golden and crisp.

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spicy chicken noodles Serves 2–4

You will need: • Bowl • Chopping board • Sharp knife • Tablespoon • Wok or frying pan • Measuring jug • Wooden spoon

Ingredients: • 125g Chinese noodles, cooked or ready to use • 75g frozen sweetcorn kernels • 75g frozen peas • 400g chicken breast • 4 spring onions • 3 tbsp vegetable oil • 2 tbsp mild curry paste (korma is ideal) • 150ml chicken stock • 150ml coconut milk • Pinch of dried red chilli flakes • Juice of ½ lime

What to do: • Cook the noodles, following the instructions on the packet, and set aside. Measure out the sweetcorn and peas and leave them in a bowl to defrost.

• Cut the chicken into strips. Chop the spring onions.

• Heat the oil in the wok or frying pan. Add the spring onions and stir fry for about two minutes.

• Now add the chicken strips and stir and cook for five minutes.

• Add the curry paste, stock, coconut milk and chilli flakes. Stir well, bring it up to a simmer and let it cook for 10 minutes.

• Add the noodles, sweetcorn and peas, and cook everything for a further three minutes.

• Lastly, add the lime juice, give everything a final stir and serve up in bowls.

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Text copyright © Michael Bond 2011 / Recipes copyright © Lesley Young 2011 / Illustrations copyright © R. W. Alley 2011 / Photographs copyright © HarperCollins Publishers Ltd 2011

book extract

blackberry and apple crumble Serves 4–6

You will need: • Chopping board • Sharp knife • Potato peeler • Ovenproof dish about 20cm x 30cm and 5cm deep • Mixing bowl • Sieve • Tablespoon

Ingredients: • 500g cooking apples • 250g blackberries • 55g caster sugar • 200g plain flour • 100g unsalted, cold butter, cut into cubes • 125g demerara sugar

What to do: • Preheat the oven to 200ºC. • Peel and core the apples and cut into large chunks. Wash the blackberries and place all the fruit in the ovenproof dish.

• Add the caster sugar, and mix it through the fruit with your hands to spread it about.

• To make the crumble, sieve the flour into the mixing bowl and add the butter. Rub the butter into the flour with your fingertips, until the mixture looks like breadcrumbs. Stir in the demerara sugar.

• Spread the crumble mixture over the fruit in the dish and pat it down so there are no bald patches. Bake for 35 to 40 minutes, until the top is golden brown and there are purple juices bubbling at the edges.

• Leave for 10 minutes before dishing up. Serve with cream, crème fraîche or ice cream.

about the book Michael Bond, author of the popular Paddington series, says that the simplest of dishes, provided they are made with style, are the most satisfying. This is why these unpretentious, yet delicious dishes will satisfy even the fussiest of young gourmands.

Paddington, who hails from Peru, loves food, especially if it contains marmalade. He lives with the Browns at Number 32 Windsor Gardens and has been taking cooking lessons from their housekeeper, Mrs Bird.

In this delightful book, Paddington’s Cookery Book (HarperCollins Publishers), with its illustrations by R.W. Alley and recipes by Lesley Young, Paddington shares some of his favourite dishes. The recipes have easy, step-by-step instructions and there are wonderful stories about Paddington’s trips to the market, preparations for his Christmas birthday party and his first blackberry-picking expedition. Children of all ages will treasure this story-cum-cookbook. It is available at all good bookstores.

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resource

Get out the atlas, renew everyone’s passports and pick one (or more) of these inspirational travel ideas for your next family holiday. By CHILD MAGAZINE

False Bay, Cape Town Muizenberg is home to a historical battle site and Het NEAR Posthys, the oldest building on the False Bay coastline, while the Edwardian-style Railway Station and Victorian beach houses showcase the area’s distinctive architecture. Simon’s Town’s historical mile gives visitors the chance to learn about the area’s naval history. Visit museums, browse antique shops or take in the harbour. For more info: visit awhaleofaheritageroute.co.za Sterkfontein Caves, Gauteng The Cradle of Humankind, with its archaeological digs

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and fossil deposits, is a site worth seeing. It was here that Mrs Ples, a 2,1 million-yearold Australopithecus africanus skull, was discovered. The almost complete skeleton of Little Foot, dating back three million years, was also discovered here. Tours take visitors deep into the caves where you can see amazing rock formations and learn about our early ancestors. For more info: visit maropeng.co.za Ephesus, Turkey This ancient city has a vibrant mix of culture and history, and is known as FAR one of Turkey’s great outdoor museums. Built by the Greeks and inhabited by the Romans, Ephesus also

Machu Picchu, Peru

played host to the likes of Alexander the Great, John the Baptist, and, some say, the Virgin Mary. Visitors should see the Hillside Houses, the Library of Celsus and the amphitheatres. Be sure to sample Turkish apple tea and bargain with shop vendors.

For more info: visit kusadasi.biz Machu Picchu, Peru Ancient Incan ruins are hidden high in the mountains where visitors can see temples and houses built from stones carved out of the mountainside. Of particular interest is the Intihuatana Stone, which is the only ritual stone not destroyed

by Spanish conquerors. Nearby Cusco gives tourists the chance to experience Inca culture first-hand. For more info: visit machupicchu.org

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The Garden Route Cycling around the Knysna area gives families the opportunity to see NEAR beautiful scenery, including panoramic views of the Knysna Heads. Harkerville has a number of circular routes, ranging from easy to tough, while the Homtini Trail is moderate with some steep bits. The weather is usually mild, but heavy rain may close several of the routes.

You also need a permit for some of them.

For more info: visit gardenroute.co.za Namaqualand Granite rock formations, farm towns and fields of daisies make this destination a must-see. There is plenty of accommodation in the area, so it is easy to find a base and cycle from there. Routes accommodate different experience and fitness levels, and travel through mountain passes or along district roads. Go after the winter rains, when the desert flowers bloom. Permits are required on most routes.

For more info: visit namaqualand.com Denmark With over 12 000km of marked cycle routes and paths that run alongside main roads, FAR this is a bicycle-friendly country.

The distances between stops are generally quite short, but you can take bicycles with you on the trains. Most of the routes are on flat terrain, and take you past

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The Garden Route

numerous family-friendly campsites. You can also see Viking castles or other historical relics on your travels. Avoid visiting in February when the temperature plummets and most of the sights are closed. For more info: visit cycling-embassy.dk Mallorca, Spain This island is a popular cycling destination, given its mild winter weather and extensive route networks.

The terrain ranges from flat to hilly and mountainous. Take short trips between the villages, or travel longer routes around the island. Stay over at the fincas or country farms. For more info: visit seemallorca.com

Sodwana Bay, KwaZulu-Natal Snorkelling in these warm waters will give you a taste of the NEAR kaleidoscopic ocean, but to fully appreciate all that it has to offer you would need to slip on an oxygen tank and explore the many caves, pinnacles and drop-offs. Introduce children to snorkelling by letting them explore the natural rock pools. The best time to visit is from November to February, when leatherback, loggerhead and green turtles breed on the shores of the iSimangaliso Wetland Park.

For more info: visit sodwanabay.com Snorkelling with seals, Cape Town If you can brave the icy waters of the Atlantic with a wet suit, snorkel and mask, you will be able to dip below the surface and experience life through the eyes of a playful seal. No previous snorkelling experience is necessary, but you do need to be a good swimmer. Go with one of the companies that organises look-outs for sharks to ensure your safety, giving you the peace of mind to interact freely with the seals. For more info: visit scubashack.co.za

FAR

The Indonesian Archipelago This region comprises more than 17 000 islands, each with unique attractions and diverse marine life. There are beginner

and advanced diving options (with reef sharks and majestic whale sharks as possible dive companions) and various activities such as hikes up dormant volcanoes and visits to religious temples.

For more info: visit indonesia.travel Bonaire, Caribbean The island of Bonaire is encircled by a 30-year-old marine sanctuary that is home to sea horses, shipwrecks and a coral reef. It is ranked as one of the top four scuba diving and snorkelling destinations and offers mangroves for kayaking, bays for wind surfing and the Washington Slagbaai National Park for hikes. Young children who are just learning to swim will enjoy its calm waters and warm ocean temperatures. For more info: visit infobonaire.com

Sodwana Bay

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resource

Dubrovnik, Croatia

Craven Country Jamboree, Qu’Appelle Valley, Canada This country music festival takes FAR place in July and offers a starstudded line-up, rodeos and street carnivals. When you’re not dancing to the main stage’s offerings, you can watch professional bull-riding demonstrations while eating breakfast. Take the family to a

Wilderness Festival

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Nqileni Village, Transkei As the Bulungula Lodge team says: paradise is, by definition, difficult NEAR to get to, but see it as a fun mission. The eco-friendly backpacker’s lodge, just two-and-a-half hours from Coffee Bay on the Wild Coast, has been voted one of the world’s top 25 ethical travel experiences. Get involved in the community by volunteering with one of the projects run by the Bulungula Incubator.

For more info: visit bulungula.com and http://bulungulaincubator.wordpress.com

Nqileni Village, Transkei

Tutuka Family Conservation Project, Botswana If you have children aged eight to 16 years, you can join this project. You learn about the unique ecosystems and wildlife while conducting real conservation tasks and studies alongside an experienced wildlife ranger. You provide hands-on support to disadvantaged rural schools, helping with maintenance as well as educating the school children about their environment.

Discover and explore the bush ecosystems by vehicle and on foot. For more info: visit conservationafrica.net magazine cape town

PHOTOGRAPHS AND ILLUSTRATIONS: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM / SODWANA BAY – Steve Rubin / NQIleni village – Mike cohen

AfrikaBurn, Tankwa Karoo National Park A community of volunteers gathers once a year in NEAR the desert to create a temporary city of music and performance, art, theme camps and costumes. When you think “AfrikaBurn”, think “radical” in every sense. The April festival does not allow any commercial exchange, so there are no cash bars, vendors or branded promotion of services or products. You have to bring everything that you’ll need for the duration of your stay and you may want to make use of the festival’s gift economy option. Their website provides a breakdown of necessities. You still have to pay an entry fee as there is no corporate sponsorship of the event. Children under 14 enter free. For more info: visit afrikaburn.com White Mountain Festival, Central Drakensberg This three-day acoustic music festival takes place in September, coinciding with the start of the school holidays. Expect performances by top South African artists, as well as art and crafts, a beer market, and assorted food stalls and outdoor activities, which range from abseiling, paintball and helicopter flips to fishing, boating, hiking and a zip-line across a 100m-wide gorge.

Festival-goers can also make full use of the lodge’s facilities, including a restaurant and rustic 150-year-old pub, a children’s playground and swimming pool, and you can choose from camping, caravanning or a chalet for accommodation. For more info: visit whitemountain.co.za

hypnotist act, a songwriter’s circle, a karaoke session at the chilled-out Trailer Park Saloon or attend a nondenominational church service. For more info: visit cravencountryjamboree.com Wilderness Festival, Oxfordshire, England This festival of music, food and literature, which was named best new festival in 2011, is set among the meadows, lakes and canopies of the ancient Wychwood Forest and takes place in August (summer).

Boutique Babysitting allows children from two to eight to play in a safe, covered area and offers organised, age-appropriate activities.

For more info: visit wildernessfestival.com

Jabillos, Costa Rica You find yourself immersed in nature, surrounded by plants and FAR animals, with tropical beaches in one direction, and rainforests and active volcanoes in the other. Volunteer your time at the Jabillos-based Proyecto Asis Wildlife Rescue Centre for injured, orphaned or illegally traded animals such as sloths, raccoons, owls and macaws. You can also explore La Fortuna, a town offering activities centred on the Arenal Volcano.

Either hike to a lava field, glide along cables above the rainforest canopy or splash in a hot spring at the volcano’s base. For more info: visit handsupholidays.com Phnom Penh, Cambodia From your base in an eco-luxury boutique hotel in Cambodia’s capital, explore one of the new Wonders of the World, Angkor Wat and the temple complex, and discover the floating village on Tonle Sap Lake. Tour the Royal Palace and renowned Wat Phnom Hill and visit the Siem Reap night market. After sightseeing, help teach at an orphanage in the Angkor Wat temple complex or help build a house for an impoverished family.

For more info: visit handsupholidays.com

Wathaba trail, Mpumalanga An untouched treasure in the Skurweberg mountains where NEAR you can hear the chatter of the wagtail and crashing of the seven magnificent waterfalls. There is a 10km and 4km circular trail that winds around mushrooms, lichen and wild flowers on its way to the impressive Rainbow Falls.

These trails are suitable for young children, from the age of five. The more adventurous hiker will find the neighbouring Num-Num Trail more challenging. For more info: visit wathaba.co.za or thenum-numtrail.co.za

Wathaba Trail, Mpumalanga

Phnom Penh, Cambodia

Slackpacking on the Wartrail Wander With bubbling brooks that snake through the valleys to the soaring eagles you encounter on the peaks, the Wartrail traverses the southern Drakensberg in the Eastern Cape, past Bushmen paintings and unique rock formations. Children must have some hiking experience and, as a guideline, be older than 12, although it does depend on the child’s fitness. It can be arranged for children to take part in farm activities while you tackle the trail. For more info: visit footprint.co.za Dubrovnik, Croatia Vehicles are not allowed in this medieval city, making it safe for you to stroll FAR along its paved streets, taking in the warmth and charm of the residents who frequent its cafés and courtyards. A 2km walk along the wall of the Old City gives you a view of the Adriatic Sea. The best time to visit is during the summer festival, a 45-day cultural event with live plays, concerts and games.

For more info: visit dubrovnik-guide.net Walking in Segovia, Spain Hire a donkey to ride at a leisurely pace in the towns or the Guadarrama Nature Reserve. Conjure up a world of dragons and knights, as you tread past the Roman aqueducts and castles. The children can take turns leading or riding on the backs of the placid donkeys. For more info: visit awayfromthecrowds.com

always a firm favourite Built with families and children in mind, the Disneylands, worlds and parks come with theme parks, rides, hotels, restaurants and entertainment. Plus, children get the chance to meet their favourite Disney characters.

In the United States, there is the Walt Disney World Resort near Orlando, Florida, which is the most popular theme park in the world. Disneyland Park is in California, and is home to Space Mountain, Pixie Hollow and Sleeping Beauty’s Castle.

Internationally, Tokyo Disney Resort is the third most popular theme park in the world, and boasts DisneySea, a unique Disney theme park. Disneyland Paris has three main areas, one of which is Walt Disney Studios, where visitors can get a taste of Hollywood. Hong Kong Disneyland has incorporated Chinese culture into the design, but still offers the same Disney experience.

You can also hop on board one of the Disney Cruise Lines. These luxury ships offer visitors pools, restaurants, youth clubs and Disney activities, as well as something for the adults. For more info: visit disneyparks.disney.go.com

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books

a good read for toddlers

for preschoolers

Turn and Learn: Baby Animals and On the Farm

By Roger Priddy

Gruffalo What Can You See?

By Julia Donaldson and illustrated

by Axel Scheffler (Published by Macmillan Children’s Books, R64) This handy little pram book is perfect to introduce very young children to the ever-popular Gruffalo character. Join the Gruffalo as he takes a stroll through the Deep Dark Wood in this bold, bright and portable book. Point out the rustling leaves, big green trees, spotty toadstools, little butterflies, beautiful birds, scuttling bugs and all the characters from the classic story. This book is part of the new My First Gruffalo series for babies and toddlers, from the bestselling author/illustrator team.

(Published by Priddy Books, R48 each) Children from the age of two can turn the wheels and learn more about farm animals and baby animals in these two board books with bright colours and real photography. The interactive books encourage your toddler’s imagination; help with problem solving and handeye coordination. There are furry rabbits, playful puppies, seal pups, adventurous lions, fluffy chicks, leaping kittens, hanging monkeys, an elephant calf, barns, horses, farm produce and spotty pigs to play and interact with.

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory Pop-up Book

By Roald Dahl and illustrated

by Quentin Blake

The Cross-With-Us Rhinoceros, The Warthog’s Tail and The Giraffe who got in a Knot

By John Bush; illustrated by Paul Geraghty and Lindsay van Blerk (Published by Storytime Africa, from R69) A group of young adventurers discover a lone rhinoceros. Panic sets in and they run for safety. In the second book, the warthog’s tail is a wonder. When he runs it stands up and when he stands it goes under, but it hasn’t always been like this.

In the last book, in a rapture of eating, Cardwell Giraffe closes his eyes and begins munching away. What follows next will have you in knots of laughter. For direct orders: funtasee@cybersmart.co.za

(Published by Puffin Books, R269) The story is still the same: Charlie Bucket loves chocolate, and Mr Willy Wonka, the most wondrous inventor in the world, is opening the gates of his amazing chocolate factory to five lucky children. It’s the prize of a lifetime! Gobstoppers, wriggle sweets and a river of melted chocolate delight await.

Charlie needs just one golden ticket and these delicious treats could all be his. With this book, including original illustrations by Blake, children can explore Willy Wonka’s amazing world with unique pop-ups, tabs to pull and flaps to lift. Each book comes with a golden ticket.

for early graders Ruby Redfort: Look into my Eyes

By Lauren Child

t llen exce d rea

(Published by HarperCollins Children’s Books, R140) Break out of the boredom of ordinary life with Ruby Redfort, the new creation from multimillion-copy bestseller, Lauren Child. She’s a code-cracker, a daring detective, and a special agent who just happens to be a 13-year-old girl. Somehow Ruby finds her way into the HQ of the secret agency, Spectrum where she gets involved in a high-action adventure. This great new read for youngsters goes back to Ruby’s beginnings as an agent.

The Book of Which?

Illustrated by Ray Bryant (Published by Macmillan Children’s Books, R88) The world is full of questions. Now, at last, you can get the answer to 50 of the most mind-boggling of all. These include: Which bird flies underwater? Which computer was as big as a bus? Which country has more sheep than people? Which planet is king? Which is the biggest creepy-crawly?

Which are the steepest railways and which bridge can break in two? Apart from the descriptions, each insert comes with a handy little “did you know?” box, giving your child even more information. The illustrations are child-friendly – bright and humorous and the book includes a few quizzes and a section explaining difficult words.

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Tollins 2: Dynamite Tales

By Conn Iggulden and illustrated by Lizzy Duncan (Published by HarperCollins Children’s Books, R158) This is the second collection of three stories of the Tollins in which they face the trials of theatre, radio and armed invasion. In Romeo and Beryl, Sparkler discovers an old human book and decides to put on a play. It’s a story of great love, with quite a bit of shouting. In Radio, the Dark Tollins of Dorset invade in force, with a cat in tow. Sparkler, Wing and Grunion must find a way to save themselves, and possibly the cat. In Bones, the Tollins leave Chorleywood on a mission of mercy. You will discover the importance of hot tea and toast, as well as jam, in such desperate times.

for preteens and teens The Unforgotten Coat

By Frank Cottrell Boyce

best buy

(Published by Walker Books, R118) This book for children from the age of nine was short-listed for the Costa Book Awards 2011, one of the UK’s most popular and prestigious literary prizes. Two refugee brothers from Mongolia are determined to fit in with their Liverpool schoolmates. However, they bring so much of Mongolia to Bootle that their new friend and guide, Julie, is hard-pressed to distinguish truth from fantasy as she recollects a wonderful friendship that was abruptly ended when Chingis and his family were forced to return to Mongolia. Told with humour, warmth and brilliant detail, this magical and compelling story is enriched by stunning and atmospheric Polaroid photos.

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for preteens and teens

for us

Gangsta Granny

By David Walliams

Gallows Hill

By Margie Orford

(Published by HarperCollins Children’s Books, R150) Walliams has been called the natural successor to Roald Dahl, and in Gangsta Granny he proves this with his wit, warmth and humour. Our hero, Ben, is bored beyond belief after he is made to stay at his grandma’s house. She’s the dullest grandma ever: all she wants to do is play Scrabble and eat cabbage soup. But there are two things Ben doesn’t know about his grandma: she was once an international jewel thief; and two, she has spent her whole life plotting to steal the crown jewels, and now she needs Ben’s help…

(Published by Jonathan Ball Publishers, R176) A dog scavenging in an illegal building site digs up a human bone. She drags it back to where her mistress lies dead in an abandoned shed, but there are hundreds more... skeletons, which have lain undisturbed for centuries beneath Gallows Hill, where Cape Town’s notorious gibbets once stood. Investigative profiler Dr Clare Hart is called in by Captain Riedwaan Faizal and she soon discovers that a deadly secret lies hidden among these long-buried bones. Who was the woman in the green silk dress and who wanted her dead? Against the backdrop of corporate corruption and seething political tensions, Clare and Riedwaan’s complex relationship remains as explosive as ever – and their lives are at risk: the keepers of the secret of the woman in the silk dress will stop at nothing to keep the truth buried.

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Been There Done That

By David Bristow (Published by Struik Travel and Heritage, R262) At the age of 14, author David Bristow stuck a large touring map of South Africa on his bedroom wall, determined to eventually mark off every road. Indeed, in 40 years of dedicated travelling, David has pretty much “been there, done that”, visiting most of South Africa’s game parks, nature reserves, mountain ranges, beaches and towns, as well as hiking and biking countless trails. This book is the accumulated knowledge of all those explorations: the history, wildlife, geography, art and culture, things to do, places to stay and routes and trails to be discovered. Anyone who has ticked off a tenth of the entries here is, according to the author, qualified to wear the T-shirt.

proudly south african

The Principal of Fun

By Almarie Mead (Published by Principal of Fun, R180) Almarie Mead, a principal for over 18 years and with 31 years in education, wrote this guide filled with 134 positive and constructive ideas of how to establish and grow a school with heart. Each idea can be used by someone who is passionate about children and education. They are easy to implement and will make a significant difference in any school. Presented in a useful handbook format, with space for your own notes, support documents and templates included, this book can be re-used. To order and for more information, visit theprincipaloffun.co.za or visit them on Facebook at The Principal of Fun. We’ve added some nifty tools from the book for you to use online. These include an anti-bullying guideline and procedure document and a “I am not a bully” pledge. To download these, visit childmag.co.za/content/bullying

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calendar

what’s on in march

You can also access the calendar online at

childmag.co.za

Here’s your guide for what to do, where to go and who to see. Compiled by LUCILLE KEMP.

10 sat

special events

40

FUN for children

41

only for parents

44

bump, baby & tot in tow

45

how to help

46

Jan van Riebeeck Primary School mountain trail, fun run and market day ZipZap Circus performs and other entertainment includes the Kalahari Boere Orkes as well as a surprise guest artist.

FUN FOR CHILDREN

ONLY FOR PARENTS

bump, baby & tot in tow

how to help

Guitar workshops with Derek Gripper Your child or you can master a wide range of guitar skills, specifically focusing on African and classical music, improvisation and composition.

Ice cream and wine tasting at Clos Malverne This sensational wine-tasting experience combines four delicious ice creams with a selection of Clos Malverne wines.

Home Birth Gathering Come together to explore the basic needs of pregnant women and women in labour and explore your rights around having these needs met.

Send your child to Aquatots Swim School When you enrol your child at the school, based at Bel Porto School for Mentally Handicapped Children, a portion of the fees is donated.

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PHOTOGRAPHS: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM/unicycle for charity: shawn benjamin, arkimages.co.za

SPECIAL EVENTS

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calendar

8 thursday Stepping Out The Musical The heartwarming, toe-tapping musical follows the story of the lives, loves and laughs of a group of women and one man attending a weekly tap class in a dingy church hall. Performed by a cast of talented St Cyprian’s High School girls. Ends 10 March.

Time: 7pm. Venue: St Cyprian’s school hall, Gorge Rd, Oranjezicht. Cost: R80. Contact: 021 461 1090

10 saturday

2 March – Woordfees

SPECIAL EVENTS 2 friday Woordfees A Word-and-Wine celebration of the country’s best authors and icons takes place at participating wine estates on the Simonsberg route. Visit the website for an extensive Word-and-Wine programme.

Ends 11 March. Time: varies. Venue: Greater Simonsberg sub-route. Cost: tbc. Contact: 021 886 8275 or visit wineroute.co.za or woordfees.co.za

3 saturday Cape Argus Pick n Pay MTB Challenge Riders from across the country descend on Franschhoek for a weekend of family fun and challenging dirt-track races. Also

4 March. Time: 8:20am for the 13km, 7:30am for the 29km, 7:50am for the 32km, 7:20am for the 52km, 7am for the 65km. Venue: Boschendal Wine Estate.

Cost: R80–R200 for PPA members and R60–R180 for non-PPA members. For more info: visit mtbchallenge.co.za

4 sunday Eikendal Weintaufe Harvest Celebration The celebration promises to attract a vibrant crowd of families and friends who enjoy Eikendal wine tastings of the flagship chardonnay, live music entertainment, craft stalls, lucky draws, vineyard tractor rides, fly-fishing, barrel stomping, pony rides and loads of children’s entertainment. Time: 10am.

Venue: Eikendal Wine Estate, on the R44, midway between Stellenbosch and Somerset West. Cost: adults R60, children under 12 free. Contact: 021 855 1422 or counter@eikendal.co.za

6 tuesday

4 March – Eikendal Weintaufe Harvest Celebration

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Infecting the City public arts festival Celebrated local and international artists create artworks that unlock the communal spaces in the city centre, encouraging audiences to take a fresh look at the Mother City, its citizens, and themselves.

Ends 10 March. Time: 2pm–5pm and 6pm–10pm. Venue: in and around Cape Town CBD. Cost: free. Contact: 021 418 3336 or visit infectingthecity.com

Cape Argus Pick n Pay Tricycle and Junior Tours The Tricycle Tour is aimed at youngsters between the ages of 2 and 6 years who, together with a parent or guardian on foot, get to navigate an easy 1,5km fun ride. The Junior Tour is ideal for learners between the ages of 6 and 12 years. The “No Helmet, No Ride” rule applies. Registration takes place 2–9 March. The doable distances are 1,5km, 5km and 10km. Time: 8:30am. Venue: Youngsfield Military Base, Wynberg. Cost: R60. For more info: visit juniortour.co.za Info morning and introductory talk There are children’s activities and a farmers’ market. Time: 10:30am–11:30am

3 sat

for the introductory talk and 9am–2pm for the market. Venue: Stellenbosch Waldorf School, Spier Wine Farm. Cost: free entry. Contact: 021 881 3867 or visit waldorfschool.org.za Jan van Riebeeck Primary School mountain trail, fun run and market day Expect a dedicated children’s play area, a ZipZap Circus performance, live music with the Kalahari Boere Orkes and a surprise guest artist. There is also a deli, beer garden and gourmet chef’s braai. The school that has the most entries into the fun run receives R5 000. Time: 5am for registration. Venue: Jan van Riebeeck Primary School, Kloof St. Cost: tbc. Contact Lize: 083 630 9661 or Louise: 021 423 4209 or visit jvrprim.co.za

16 friday Wetpups fun night Many games and food stalls to enjoy, and prizes to be won.

Time: 3:30pm–10:30pm. Venue: Western Province Preparatory School, Claremont.

Cost: free entry. Contact: 021 761 8074 Camps Bay Preparatory School open day View the facilities and meet the teachers. Time: 8:30am–12pm. Venue: The Drive, Camps Bay. Cost: free. Contact Vivienne: 082 466 8261

Mom-baby workshop Expectant moms, partners and those with little ones can enjoy an informative, nurturing, fun morning that leaves them empowered and equipped for the great task of parenting. The day is led by clinical psychologist Jeanine Beukes, who can showcase a range of infant-parent interactions. Babyand-mom yoga expert Bella Ellis, and clinical psychologist and Babies in Mind author Jenny Perkel, explain the new role that a father plays in today’s world.

Time:

9am–12:30pm.

Venue:

J&J

building, Red Cross Children’s Hospital, Rondebosch. Cost: R350 per person or R500 per couple, which includes tea, coffee and healthy snacks. Contact: 021 486 9111, 078 728 1976 or eileen@onscreenav.co.za

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6 March – Infecting the City Public Arts Festival

17 saturday St Paddy’s Day Expect Irish folk and contemporary music, while enjoying a tasting of award-winning wines. Those best dressed in green stand a chance of winning prizes. Time: 10am–2:30pm.

Venue: Durbanville Hills. Cost: free entry.

Contact: 021 558 1300 or SIBrown@ durbanvillehills.co.za The Durbanville Plaasfees The festival offers handmade products such as jewellery and clothes as well as biltong and homemade jam, and entertainment such as water bubble balls, rides, viewing tractors and farm animals. Time: 10am–12pm.

Venue: Diemersdal Wine Estate, Adderley Rd, Durbanville. Cost: R30 parking per vehicle. Contact Alida: 082 417 5473 or kommunikasie@isales.co.za Wellington Harvest Festival Celebrate with an array of activities for the whole family. A highlight of the weekend is the Bosman Long Lunch. Also 18 March.

Time: varies for each wine farm. Venue: participating wine farms of the Wellington wine region. Cost: adults R80, children under 18 free. Contact: 021 864 2479 or info@wellington.co.za

18 sunday SPCA Walkies in the Winelands The popular Woefie-Wandel is going rustic this year with either a 2km meander through low-lying vineyards or with a longer 4km route. Afterwards, walkers and their dogs can relax and picnic on

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the banks of the estate’s dam. Time: 9am. Venue: Nitida Cellars, Durbanville Wine Valley. Cost: from R35 per person and from R25 per dog. Children in prams enter free. To pre-register: visit spca-ct.co.za, to pre-book picnic baskets: info@cassiarestaurant.co.za

Eat In DStv Food Network Produce Awards The ceremony acknowledges and celebrates outstanding, independent South African producers, food markets and outlets for their innovation. Time: 9am. Venue: Stellenbosch Slowmarket, Oude Libertas Estate, Oude Libertas Road, Stellenbosch.

Cost: free entry. Contact: 021 417 1111 or visit eat-in.co.za Franschhoek Oesfees David Kramer returns to the stage and joins a showstopping line-up with Emo Adams and Chris Chameleon. Time: 10am–9pm. Venue: Solms Delta. Cost: adults R95–R130, children under 12 free. Contact: 021 874 3937, info@ solms-delta.co.za or visit solms-delta.co.za Laborie Easter Festival Expect an appearance by the Easter Bunny, face painting, jumping castles, a clown show and an Easter egg hunt. Time: 2pm. Venue: Laborie Wine Farm, Paarl. Cost: R100 per adult and R60 per child. Book through Webtickets: visit webtickets.co.za

21 wednesday Human Rights Day Circus Show A circus extravaganza with acrobats, trapeze artists, the amazing Man in the Bottle, hilarious clowns and much more. Time: 3pm. Venue: Hartleyvale, Observatory.

Cost: R30 per child and R50 per adult.

Contact: 021 692 4287

23 friday Cape Getaway Show There are over 200 exhibits showcasing everything you need to plan your next adventure. Ends 25 March. Time: 10am–6pm, Friday; 9am–7pm, Saturday; 9am–5pm, Sunday.

Venue: Lourensford Wine Estate, Somerset West. Cost: adults R50, pensioners and students R30, children under 12 free. For more info: visit getawayshow.co.za

24 saturday Boere Sports Day Enter your family into the indigenous games, potjiekos competition and more. Time: 8am–3pm.

Venue: Dawid’s Kraal, Betty’s Bay. Cost: free entry. Contact Gloria: 084 236 0721 or gloria@sizisaukhanyo.co.za or Roxanne: 084 559 4545 or roxyj1214@gmail.com

10 sat

Hout Bay Sandcastle Competition Hundreds of people compete to build the most impressive sand castles, in aid of education funds.

Time: 9:30am for sand-castle building. Venue: Hout Bay beach.

Cost: adults R30, children R15, school teams for the interschool category R150, corporate teams and sponsored Sonwabile teams R700. Contact: 021 790 1540 or visit houtbaysandcastle.co.za

30 friday Toffie Pop Festival Cape Town Toffie Pop is a Capetonian-Argentinean threeday festival focusing on contemporary popular culture, design, music, magazine publishing and art. Ends 1 April. Time: 9am–10pm. Venue: Cape Town City Hall, cnr Darling St and Parade St. Cost: R500– R750. Contact: 021 462 6092, toffie@ thepresident.co.za or visit pop.toffie.co.za

31 saturday Nutwood Forest Montessori family fun day Yearly fundraiser with various stalls and children’s entertainment. Time: 10am–2:30pm. Venue: Nutwood Forest Montessori, Breamer Rd, Green Point. Cost: adults free, children R15. Contact Joy: 021 439 4874

FUN FOR CHILDREN art, culture and science Beginner’s fabric painting course starts Suitable for adults and children.

3 March. Time: 8:45am–10:45am.

Venue: Pinelands. Cost: R170. Contact Wendy: 021 531 8076, 082 391 4954 or wendyadriaan@telkomsa.net Collect-a-Can National Schools Competition The competition offers cash prizes to the schools that collect the most cans per month with additional prizes for schools that collect the most cans throughout the year. For more info: 011 466 2939, janette@collectacan.co.za or visit collectacan.co.za Mosaic Academy workshops Vibey class, ideal for beginners and advanced students.

3 and 17 March. Time: 2pm–5pm. Venue: Hout Bay. Cost: adults R220, children 8–14 years R160. Cost includes stick-on materials only. Contact: 021 790 2734, 072 372 1047, info@elke-losskarn.com or visit elkelosskarn.com Mural art workshops for children Create your own mural; then take it home with you. Three-hour workshops on a theme for the day presented by Mural Maniac. Ideal for ages 10–16 years. Time: 9am–12pm, every Saturday. Venue: 1 General Schalk Burger Close, Welgelegen. Cost: R550,

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which includes paints, materials, mural board and light refreshments. Contact Theo: 021 559 6090, muralmaniac@ telkomsa.net or visit muralmaniac.co.za SA Post Office letter-writing competition Learners up to the age of 15 are invited to take part in the 41st International Letter-Writing Competition.

The theme this year is centered on the Olympic Games. Cash prizes to be won. The national winning letter will also be sent to the Universal Postal Union for consideration for the international prize. Entries close 31 March. Send your entries to LetterWriting Competition, PO Box 800, Pretoria, 0001. Contact Nancy: 012 649 6554 or to download entry forms, visit postoffice.co.za

classes, talks and workshops Guitar workshops with Derek Gripper Derek Gripper’s unique Montessori guitar materials are designed to enable the guitar student of any level to work independently to master a wide range of guitar skills, specifically focusing on African and classical music, improvisation and composition.

Time and venue: 4:30pm–6:30pm, every Wednesday at Scarborough Community Hall or 5:30pm–7:30pm, every Tuesday at Erin Hill, Erin Road, Rondebosch. Cost: R150. Contact: derek@derekgripper.com or visit derekgripper.com Kindermusik Early childhood music therapy and movement classes for ages 0–7 years. Enjoy a free preview class.

Class times are age dependent. First term ends 16 March; second term is 16 April– 15 June. Time: age dependent, call to enquire. Venue: Bergsig Church, Boland Way, Vierlanden. Cost: R380–R400 per term. Contact Louise: 074 102 5617 or lsteenkamp0@gmail.com Tots n Pots “learning to love good food” classes A fun-filled, hands-on cooking and baking workshop spent cooking healthy snacks, meals and yummy treats. 23 January–17 March.

Time: 3pm–4pm, every Wednesday and Thursday for 2–6 year olds; 10am–11am, every Saturday for 2–10 year olds. Cost: R680 per term for eight weeks or R90 per class if space available. Contact Chene: 083 649 7405, chene@totsnpots.com or visit totsnpots.com

family outings Barleycorn Music Festival Food and drink can be purchased plus there is a

jumping castle for children, face painting and more. 10 March. Time: 2pm–10pm.

Venue: Maynardville Amphitheatre, Wynberg. Cost: adults R60, children under 12 free. Contact Martin: 082 493 1564 or mpeterson@zsd.co.za Human Rights Day Circus Show 21 March. Time: 3pm. Venue: Hartleyvale, Observatory. Cost: R30 per child and R50 per adult. Contact: 021 692 4287

finding nature and outdoor play Family sleepover for Two Oceans Aquarium Solemate members Pack a sleeping bag, a tent if you like, a picnic supper and enjoy an overnight adventure at the aquarium. 31 March. Time: 7pm Saturday–8am Sunday. Venue: Two Oceans Aquarium, V&A Waterfront, Cape Town. Cost: free for Solemate members.

Contact: 021 418 3823 or members@ aquarium.co.za Wildlife Photographer of the Year Awards Natural History Unit Africa and Iziko Museums exhibit a collection of the year’s best wildlife photography. Ends 7 March. Time: 10am–5pm daily. Venue: Iziko South African Museum, 25 Victoria St, Gardens. Cost: adults R25, students and pensioners R10, children under 18 free. For more info: visit nhm.ac.uk/wildphoto Yacht Trip for Two Oceans Aquarium Solemate members Join them aboard one of Cape Town’s stylish catamarans for a marine eco-tour, which focuses on the rich biodiversity found in the waters off Cape Town’s Table Bay and surrounds.

Take a picnic basket and relax while enjoying uninterrupted seascapes and possibly spotting a dolphin or two. 17 March. Time: 10am–12pm. Venue: Two Oceans Aquarium, V&A Waterfront. Cost: free for Solemate members. For further information on this event, how to become a Solemate member and enjoy unlimited access to the Aquarium as well as a host of other benefits, contact the Members’ Centre: 021 418 3823 or members@ aquarium.co.za.

holiday activities Autumn fun factory holiday club A semi-structured morning of art and crafts, baking, face painting, dress up, play in a fairy garden, clambering, water fun, dancing and story time. For 3–8 year olds. 22–30 March and 3–5 April. Time:

31 March – Family sleepover for Two Oceans Aquarium Solemate members

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10 sat

OmmiBerg “Round the Rock” Festival Pack your picnic basket for a day of delights with the family, gathered around the largest winelands rock. Start your day stomping grapes then let the children loose on the pony rides, slip ‘n’ slides, jumping castles, croquet, face painting, balloon shaping and a water slide, while you recline with farm-fresh treats. Time: 10am. Venue: Paarl Wine Route. Cost: R60–R70, which includes onion tart and unfiltered wine. Accompanying children under 18 enter free. For more info: visit ommiberg.co.za

9:30am–12:30pm, Monday–Friday. Venue: Kidz Discovery, The Drive, Camps Bay. Cost: R120 including a snack and materials per morning. Contact Kathy: 083 654 2494, info@kidzdiscovery.co.za or visit kidzdiscovery.co.za Circus holiday workshop academy Circus skills taught include juggling, acrobatics, trapeze, pole acrobatics, circus Hula Hooping, acro-skipping, limbo, clowning, uni-cycling and trampolining.

Ideal for ages 8 and older. 26–30 March.

Time: 9am–1pm, daily. Venue: 2 Willow Rd, Hartleyvale Stadium, Observatory. Cost: R500 per child for the week. Contact: 021 692 4287 or Nicky: 073 273 3538, sacircus@mweb.co.za or visit sancircus.co.za Davy Dragon’s Guide to the Night Sky Join Davy Dragon as he learns all about the sky above so that he can fulfil his dream of becoming the world’s best flying dragon!

This is a playful introduction to astronomy for under 10s; especially for children aged 5–10 years. Ends 18 March. Time: 12pm. Saturday and Sunday. Venue: 25 Queen Victoria Rd, Gardens. Cost: R25 for adults, R10 for children. For more info: visit iziko.org.za Doodle Creative Space holiday programme Create a pewter impression for your box, do clay work or ceramic work, make jewellery, mosaic a bunny or paint an Easter egg. For ages 5–10 years.

26 March–9 April, excluding 31 March and 1 April. Time: varies. Venue: 221 Buitenkant St, Vredehoek. Cost: R120, which includes a juice and snack, and all materials and tools for the project. Contact: 084 533 3569 or doodlecreativespace@gmail.com Easter art competition Artwork is on display at the mall and pupils can win lots of prizes. The competition is open to ages 6–14 year olds that live in the Willowbridge area. 23 March–9 April. Time: 9am–7pm.

Venue: Willowbridge Mall. Cost: free entry.

Contact Cheryl: 021 914 2851, cheryl@ cwe.co.za or visit willowbridge.co.za Kronendal aftercare holiday club Activities include art and crafts, drumming, baking, mountain hiking, a walk to the beach and swimming. 26 March–5 April.

Time: 7:30am–1pm/3pm/6pm. Venue: 10 Andrews Rd, Hout Bay. Cost: half-day R60 (bring own snack), three-quarter day R90 (includes lunch and snack), full-day R120 (includes lunch and snack). Contact: 076 402 2333 or joannefrost.s.a@gmail.com Metaphoric Adventures holiday camp For children 7–16 years. 25–30 March.

Venue: Greyton. Contact: 082 839 5529 or tanyan@metamorphicadventures.co.za

markets Bloubergrandt Annual Fête A day of games, food stalls, a jumping castle, pony rides, tea garden, vendors and prizes. 17 March. Time: 9am–1pm. Venue: 4 Curlewis Rd, Blouberg. Cost: free entry, R10 for ticket booklets. Contact: blopreprim@telkomsa.net

24 March – Constantia Waldorf Fair

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Constantia Waldorf Fair Enjoy good old-fashioned children’s games and entertainment, market stalls, fun rides and live music. 24 March. Time: 12pm–8pm.

Venue: Constantia Waldorf School, Spaanschemat River Rd, Constantia. Cost: tbc. For more info: visit cwsfair.co.za Lutheran Church Bazaar Shop for a range of Easter eggs while the children enjoy various activities, including rides and a jumping castle. There is a beer garden, cake tables and more. 24 March. Time: 9am. Venue: Evangelical Lutheran Church, cnr Smart Ave and Vasco Boulevard, Vasco.

Cost: free entry. Contact: 021 421 5854 My Favourite Things Baby and Kiddies’ Markets Handmade and locally-produced baby and children’s products, and services are on offer. Enjoy a coffee under the trees while the children enjoy the safe play area.

17 March. Time: 9am–3pm. Venue: Our Place, 46 Oxford St, Durbanville. Cost: free entry. Contact: mail@myfavouritethings. co.za or visit myfavouritethings.co.za Nitida Farmers Market On Friday, go for kebabs straight from the grid, sushi, real Italian pizza and decadent chocolate cakes.

On Saturday, grab a breakfast, deli favourites such as pomegranate balsamic reduction, homemade chutneys and sugar wands.

New to the market are a few non-food stalls.

30 and 31 March. Time: 5pm–9:30pm, Friday; 8am–12:30pm, Saturday. Venue: Cassia, Nitida Cellars, M13/Old Tygervalley Road, Durbanville. Cost: free entry. Contact Getha: 083 651 0699, getha@nitida.co.za or visit nitida.co.za Simonsberg Wine Route Market Day The Woordfees culminates in a family market day with craft stalls and harvest activities such as barrel stomping and tractor rides. The Vine Hopper provides a shuttle service to and from Stellenbosch on the day. 11 March. Time: 10am. Venue: Delvera Wine Estate. Cost: free entry. For the full Word-and-Wine programme: visit wineroute.co.za The Fabulous French Friday Market A large range of French products is available as well as fresh organic vegetables and aromatic herbs. Time: 10am–2pm, every Friday. Venue: Alliance Française of Cape Town, 155 Loop St. Cost: free. Contact: 021 423 56 99, info.cpt@alliance.org.za or visit alliance.org.za

The Fringe Handmade Market This is a showcase of goods and designs by local creatives. Time: 10am–6pm, first Saturday of the month. Venue: Harrington St. Cost: free entry. For more info: visit thefringe.org.za

on stage and screen Starlight Classics Richard Cock conducts the Cape Philharmonic Orchestra, which performs with various artists, the SA Youth Choir and Cape Town City Ballet. Take along a picnic. 2 and 3 March. Time: 2 March 7pm, 3 March 7:30pm. Venue: Vergelegen Wine Farm, Somerset West.

Cost: R170, children and pensioner R150.

Booking through Computicket: 0861 915 8000 or visit computicket.co.za The Wild Swans An enchanting retelling of the classic Hans Christian Andersen fairy tale. Narrated by famous actress Sigourney Weaver, the movie tells the tale of Princess Elise whose brothers have been turned into swans by an evil queen. 11 and 20 March.

Showing at 7pm on KidsCo DStv channel 308 and TopTV channel 255. For more info: visit kidscotv.tv

playtime and story time Djembe drumming workshop Children drum and sing, and drumming games are played in an action-packed, highenergy workshop. Ideal for children aged 3–10 years. Time: 1:30pm and 2:30pm.

Venue: Church of Christ, cnr Irene Ave and Lourensford Rd, Somerset West. Cost: R45 for 30-minutes of high-energy drumming or R140 for four consecutive sessions.

Contact Lana: 071 871 5839 or lana@ drumkidz.co.za Me-Time Saturday play day There is a puppet show, craft activity and playing.

Clothes, children’s books and paint are on sale as well. 10 March. Time: 10am–12pm.

Venue: Me-time centre, 8 Somerset Lane, Somerset Square, Green Point. Cost: R60.

Contact: 021 418 1573, info@me-time.co or visit me-time.co

sport and physical activities Delvera Hi-Tec Full Moon Hike Enjoy the sunset over Table Mountain and stunning views of the Winelands from the top of Klapmutskoppie. Suitable for children from age 6 years. 8 March. Time: 5:30pm.

Cape Argus Pick n Pay Tricycle and Junior Tours The “No Helmet, No Ride” rule applies. Registration takes place 2–9 March. The doable distances are 1,5km, 5km and 10km. Time: 8:30am. Venue: Youngsfield Military Base, Wynberg.

Cost: R60. For updated info: visit juniortour.co.za.

For more info on cycling safety, go to our website: childmag.co.za/content/ bike-safety

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Cape Argus Pick n Pay MTB Challenge 3 and 4 March. Time: 7am for the 65km, 7:20am for the 52km, 7:30am for the 29km, 7:50am for the 32km, 8:20am for the 13km. Venue: Boschendal Wine Estate. Cost: R80–R200 for PPA members and R60–R180 for nonPPA members. For more info: visit mtbchallenge.co.za

3 sat

Venue: Dirtopia Trail Centre, Delvera Farm, R44, Stellenbosch. Cost: adults R50, children 9 years and younger R20. Contact Arina: 021 884 4752, theteam@dirtopia. co.za or visit dirtopia.co.za Ryan Maron’s Cricket School of Excellence Offers off- and in-season individual and group cricket coaching to improve your child’s batting, bowling and fielding skills and to enhance their knowledge of the game. For 6–16 year olds.

Time: 9am–2pm for clinics, call to enquire about private sessions. Venue: varies. Cost: R60–R220 per hour or R500 per fourday clinic, which includes coaching, a free T-shirt, cap, bottle, drinks, magazine and parents’ coaching. Contact: 021 671 9460, 082 491 7506, ryan@cricketschool. co.za or visit cricketschool.co.za

Ryan Maron’s Cricket School of Excellence

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only for parents classes, talks and workshops Kumon Education information session If you are looking for a new career path, join the Kumon Team for a short presentation and Q&A session followed by a maths and English assessment. 8 March.

Time: tbc. Venue: tbc. Cost: free. Contact: 0800 002 775 or info@kumon.co.za Learn CPR and save a life Paediatric nursing sister Lee-Ann White runs a monthly CPR course for parents, childminders and au pairs. 3 and 17 March. Time: 10am–12pm. Venue: Pinelands. Cost: R220. Contact Lee-Ann: 021 531 4182 or 072 283 7132 Literacy workshop The workshop is for parents, teachers, au pairs and grandparents. Great ideas for 3–9 year olds using what you have at home to play up a storm. 17 March. Time: 10am–11:30am.

Venue: Milnerton Library. Cost: R80.

Contact: 082 714 4356, info@reneelighton. co.za or visit reneelighton.co.za Managing fear and anxiety in your child: a workshop for parents This workshop provides a therapeutic space for parents to explore how best to help their children with their anxiety and fear.

1 March. Time: 8:30am–12:30pm. Venue: Constellation House, 5 Oakvale Road, Rondebosch. Cost: R450 per person or R800 per couple. Contact Sarah-Jane: 079 422 5118 or drsarahjaneknight@gmail.com Mosaic Academy Beginners’ and advanced workshops on offer. Time: 9am–12pm, every Tuesday. Venue: Hout Bay. Cost: R220, including stick-on materials only. Contact: 021 790 2734, 072 372 1047, info@elkelosskarn.com or visit elke-losskarn.com Mural art workshops for adults Inspire your natural creativity and learn how to create your own mural with Mural Maniac.

Take the mural home with you. Ideal for ages 17 and older. Time: 9am–12pm, every Saturday. Venue: 1 General Schalk Burger Close, Welgelegen. Cost: R550, which includes paints, materials, mural board and light refreshments. Contact Theo: 021 559 6090, muralmaniac@telkomsa.net or visit muralmaniac.co.za.

Soul Theatre workshop This introductory course is an opportunity to play with your creative potential, individually and with others, over a course of six three-hour evening sessions where you can explore the possibilities for change. 1, 8, 22 and 29 March.

Time: 7pm–10pm. Venue: The Gatehouse, Brommersvlei Rd, Constantia. Cost: R900 for all six sessions. Contact Simric: 021 788 6613 or simric1@gmail.com Yoga classes in Hout Bay Yoga is superb for everyone, from runners and cyclists with stiff hamstrings to those who are just beginning to exercise again after some time. Time: 8:30am–9:30am, Monday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday; 6pm–7pm, Tuesday.

Venue: Boskykloof Road, Hout Bay. Cost: R600 for 10 classes, R350 for five classes, R80 for drop in. Contact: 072 290 9203, catherine@wellnessconnection.co.za or visit wellnessconnection.co.za

on stage and screen Coward & Cole A cabaret about two of the most popular composers performed

by Godfrey Johnson and Roland Perold.

7–24 March. Time: 8:30pm, Wednesday– Saturday. Venue: Kalk Bay Theatre. Cost: R100. To book: visit kbt.co.za Symphony Choir of Cape Town The symphony performs Rutter’s “Requiem” and a selection of coronation anthems.

15 March. Time: 7:30pm. Venue: St John’s Church, Wynberg. Cost: tbc. For more info: visit scct.co.za

27 feb

Cape Town International Ballet Competition Professional and non-professional dancers from South Africa and around the world face-off for gold, silver and bronze medals and big cash prizes. 27 February–4 March.

Time: 8pm. Venue: Artscape.

Cost: from R100. Book through Computicket: 0861 915 8000 or Artscape Dial-A-Seat: 021 421 7695

The Gugulethu Tenors South Africa’s sensational operatic pop crossover quartet performs live. 9 March. Time: 8pm.

Venue: Fugard Theatre. Cost: R100–R130.

Contact: 021 461 4554 or book through Computicket: 0861 915 8000

out and about Ice cream and wine tasting at Clos Malverne This sensational wine-tasting

9 March – The Gugulethu Tenors perform at the Fugard Theatre

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experience combines four delicious ice creams with a selection of Clos Malverne wines. Try their Sauvignon Blanc with Lychee & Lime ice cream. Time: 10am–4pm, Tuesday–Saturday. Venue: Clos Malverne, Devon Valley outside Stellenbosch. Cost: R55. Contact: 021 865 2022 or visit closmalverne.co.za Long Legs Fridays Experience a vibey, after-work summer spot. Each week presents a different band. Time: music starts at 7pm. Venue: 134 Long St. Cost: free entry. Contact: 021 422 3074, longlegfridays@daddylonglegs.co.za or visit daddylonglegs.co.za

support groups Childhood Cancer Foundation of South Africa Helps parents to meet other parents and survivors. For more info: visit choc.org.za Compassionate Friends of Cape Town Meetings for bereaved parents, grandparents and siblings. 2 March: Milnerton Medi-Clinic 8pm; 14 March: Constantiaberg Medi-Clinic 8pm; 16 March: Red Cross Hospital 3pm; 22 March: Bellville Library 6:30pm. Contact: 0861 CARING, 084 568 8402, support@tcfcape. co.za or visit tcfcspe.co.za LGBT parents support group For gay and lesbian parents and parents-to-be there are regular meetings to exchange ideas and experiences. Contact the Triangle Project: 021 448 3812, their helpline 021 712 6699 (between 1pm to 9pm daily) or visit triangle.org.za South African Centre for missing and exploited children For the tracing and recovery of missing children. Contact: 012 393 2002, missing.hq@saps.co.za or visit missingkids.co.za

bump, baby & Tot in tow

classes, talks and workshops

16–18 March – ProNutro AfricanX Trailrun

ProNutro AfricanX Trailrun Join in a three-day stage trail run. Kleinmond turns its attention to the race as family and friends are allowed to support the athletes at various vantage points along the route.

The race village will be a hive of activity with entertainment throughout the day. 16–18 March. Time: tbc. Venue: starting and ending in and around Kleinmond each day.

Cost: R2 500–R3 200 per couple. Contact: 086 138 3591, entries@stillwatersports.com or visit stillwatersports.com

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Home Birth Gathering Explore the basic needs of pregnant women and women in labour and their rights around having these needs met. There is a variety of speakers as well as doulas and midwives and a short film is shown. 11 March.

Time: 2pm–4pm. Venue: Erin Hall, Erin Rd, Rondebosch. Cost: R50 per person, R80 for two. Contact: ruth@homebirth.org. za or doulalana@vodamail.co.za or visit homebirth.org.za School readiness playgroups This toddler’s playgroup is an introduction to school without all the pressures of being in school. The group focuses on enhancing gross motor skills, fine motor skills, emotional and social development, and language and concept development. Ideal for children aged 18 months–3 years. Time: 9am–12pm, Monday–Friday. Venue: Me-time centre, 8 Somerset Lane, Somerset Square, Green Point. Cost: tbc. Contact: 021 418 1573, info@me-time.co or visit me-time.co

24 sat

Mont Rochelle Harvest Festival An intimate, fun-filled day, starting with a hearty early-morning breakfast. There is grape-picking, grape-stomping, a tour of the wine cellar and wine tastings as well as an alfresco lunch with live music. A game of traditional French boules rounds off this perfect day. 24 March. Time: 6am. Venue: Mont Rochelle Wine Estate, Dassenberg Rd, Franschhoek. Cost: R490. Contact: 021 876 2770 or sales@ montrochelle.co.za

Sugar and Spice Nanny Training starts in Green Point This childcare course empowers your domestic worker with all the practical skills, essential knowledge and confidence she needs to care for your children. The course includes first aid, best hygiene practices, routines, time management, nutrition, communication, menu planning and age-appropriate activities. Starts 2 March and runs over four Fridays. Time: 9am–12pm. Venue: Green Point. Cost: call to enquire. Contact Caithe: 071 366 4725, caithe@nannytraining.co.za or visit nannytraining.co.za Tiny Handz training 16 March: intermediate workshops. 17 March: basic workshops. Time: 8:30am–3pm, when both workshops are done in one day. Venue: Durbanville. Cost: call to enquire. Contact: 082 218 7339 or visit tinyhandz.co.za

playtime and story time Bellville Library Story time takes place on Wednesday mornings, and includes finger-rhymes and songs. Time: call to

enquire. Venue: Carel van Aswegen St. Contact: 021 918 2300 or bellville.library@ capetown.gov.za Moms’ Club There’s a speaker at least once a month, talking on a baby-related topic. Time: 10am–11:30am, every Tuesday during term. Venue: Medway Youth Centre, cnr Medway Rd and Milford Rd, Plumstead.

Cost: free. Contact Barbara: 074 580 4480 or eachus.rosemary@gmail.com Musisize classes for babies and toddlers Classes take place through action songs, singing, movement, nursery rhymes, playing instruments, hand puppets and blowing bubbles. The classes develop a sense of rhythm and timing, aid movement and coordination, help with social skills and build vocabulary. For children 6 months–3 years Time: call to enquire. Venue: 1 Mount Nelson Rd, Sea Point. Cost: R350 per month. Contact: 084 409 1683, debbyjam@gmail.com or visit debbydoo.co.za

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calendar

SA Preemies). Contact: 0861 LITTLE, 0861 548 853, 012 333 5359, info@lmps.co.za or visit lmps.co.za Postnatal Depression Support Association Help for moms and their family and during pregnancy. You can also join the chat group. Contact the national helpline: sms ‘help’ and your name to 082 882 0072 and they will contact you, or help@pndsa. org.za. Contact head office: 021 797 4498 or visit pndsa.org.za

For more help planning your child’s party visit

childmag.co.za/

how to help

Musisize classes for babies and toddlers

Observatory Library Regular story time at the library for babies and toddlers. Time: 11am, every Wednesday. Venue: Station Rd. Contact: 021 447 9017 or observatory. library@capetown.gov.za

Cansa Shavathon Shave or colour your hair. 3 and 4 March. Cost: adults R50 donation, children under 12 R25. For more info and a list of participating shopping malls: visit shavathon.org.za Do your bit and send your child to Aquatots Swim School When you enrol your child at Aquatots, based at Bel Porto School for Mentally Handicapped Children in Claremont, a portion of the fees is donated to the school. Many of the learners are from disadvantaged backgrounds and their families are unable to pay for school fees. Contact Joanne: 082 818 3279 One hour, one bag, one river at a time Next time you are walking the dog near the river, or when you’re at the beach, pick up the litter. Join the River Fay Facebook page for that occasional reminder.

resources/birthday-parties

Tops and Tags Collect plastic bottle tops as well as plastic bread tags. For every 50 000 bottle tops or bread tags that Interwaste receives, they are able to recycle them and generate money to buy a wheelchair for any registered charity or individual in need. They can also distribute branded boxes to community centres around the country, which they will collect once they are full.

The Cape Town drop-off point is 6 Montreal Dr, Airport 1, Airport Industrial. For more info, contact Carl: 021 368 7953 or carls@ interwaste.co.za

support groups Cleft Friends Support For parents with babies born with a cleft lip and palate.

Contact: helena@cleftfriends.co.za Cleft lip and palate support For telephonic, professional advice and referral from a speech therapist with years of experience in cleft lip and palate therapy.

Contact Ros: 021 404 6459 Hi Hopes Programme Offers families of deaf babies home-based, family-centred support and information. Contact Renee: 021 938 6066, 076 891 8188 or devilliers. renee@gmail.com La Leche League Breast-feeding Support Groups The meetings normally start at 10am, entry is free and pregnant and nursing mothers are welcome to attend. For more info: visit llli.org Little Miracles A support group for parents of premature babies (previously

Fifteen year old to ride the Pick ‘n Pay Argus Cycle Tour on a unicycle for charity Jonathan Benjamin is planning to tackle the 108km on a unicycle to raise money for Afrika Tikkun’s project “Each One Teach One”, where underprivileged children are taught through The Early Learning Centre. Support Jonathan and his cause by making a donation, visit beasport.org.za/beasport/project/power-of-one

don’t miss out!

For a free listing, email your event to lucille@childmag.co.za or fax it to 021 462 2680. Information must be received by 24 February for the April issue, and must include all relevant details. No guarantee can be given that it will be published. To post an event online, visit childmag.co.za One hour, one bag, one river at a time

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it’s party time continued...

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last laugh

our life in piñatas You can never have too many shots at beating the stuffing out of an animal-shaped papier-mâché object, muses SAM WILSON.

i

s there anything more exotic to a small child than a piñata? Even the word looks mischievous and full of fun, with that festive little squiggly flourish and echo of a party drumbeat. I remember the first time I came across one. I was about 10 years old and watching some TV programme about a Mexican family celebrating in this traditional way.

“You’re kidding,” I said to my mother, who was watching with me. “Those children are allowed to take a baseball bat to that pretty hanging thing, and if they manage to break it they are rewarded by, like, a whole shower of assorted sweeties?”

My mother was also bemused. “It just seems wrong, doesn’t it?” she said. And that was the last she thought of it.

I, on the other hand, couldn’t let go so easily. I mean, there was ludicrously cool fun being had out there, and I wasn’t

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the one having it. I continued to dream of fantastically decorated papier-mâché animals having the delicious stuffing whacked out of them. And, by gumballs, one day it was going to be me wielding that Bat of Awesome.

All of this childhood longing was kicked back into high gear when Dreas and I had children of our own. “We need to make a piñata for Joe’s birthday party,” I said to Andreas. “And when I say we, I really mean you, because I have to figure out how to make those little biscuit racing cars with the mint-sweet wheels and the half-jelly baby drivers.”

“He’s one years old, my love,” replied Andreas. “He’s going to be lucky if he stands up for his party, let alone fells a large hanging animal. I know how you feel about piñatas, but I think you’re going to have to hold that thought for a few years.”

And hold it I did, which was a good thing because, well, who knew piñatas were so difficult to make? Over the years, Dreas and I have covered balloon after balloon in sticky paper and streamers, willed them to dry in front of the fire – our sons have winter birthdays – and painted the resulting malformed animals in a variety of apologetically garish colours, but all for naught.

Actually, I lie. We did once manage to get a semblance of a piñata up at one of Benjamin’s birthdays; it just didn’t really perform as intended.

“Hey, where did you get that Fizzer?”

Benj asked one of his guests.

“It fell out of that weird purple car thing!” said the guest, pointing to the gaggle of children falling on the pile of sweets that had leaked out of the alleged piñata, long before anyone had even found a bat.

“That’s not a purple car,” bristled Andreas, just as the leaking, sticky mess gave up all shape and fell to the floor. “It’s Barney the Dinosaur.”

Why am I telling you all this? Because people, the marvellousness is finally upon us. In the last year or so, party shops have started to stock piñatas, which – and I know you won’t believe me but it’s true – you can take home, fill with sweets, hang in a tree and bash to your heart’s content.

So I am so making up for lost time.

I take piñatas to picnics, engagement parties, birthdays, hell, even to after-work drinks. And I have realised my entire life philosophy can be summed up like this: there can never be too many piñatas.

Sam Wilson is now the digital editor for Woolworths and sadly, this is her last column for Child magazine.

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PHOTOGRAPH: Andreas SpÄth

Joe, Sam and Benj