Child Magazine | Durban June 2011

D U R B A N ’ S

b e s t

g u i d e

f o r

p a r e n t s

hold the

fireworks

learn to fight right

generation Z living in a techno world

slow

swimmers is male infertility on the rise?

www.childmag.co.za

June 2011

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parenting help is at hand

health

education

74

ways to give you more time

entertainment

Hunter House P U B L I S H I N G

Parenting – definitely not for sissies!

Publisher Lisa Mc Namara • lisa@childmag.co.za

Editorial Managing Editor Marina Zietsman • marina@childmag.co.za

My first pregnancy took me by surprise – huge surprise. And I have to say that the word “huge” has stayed with me throughout this “parenting” thing. In the first few weeks with Julian, I kept waiting for someone to knock on the door and say, “thanks for looking after my baby, but I’ve come to get her now”. It was only after six weeks, when I went to the pathologist and asked for “my daughter’s test results” that it hit me; “she really is my daughter and I am her mom”.

To “huge” I have to add “humbling”. My children have taught me to apologise – to them, quite difficult, – and to my husband, really difficult. These days my parenting experiences alternate between humorous and harrowing. As our children grow up they, and society, throw all kinds of curve balls at us, balls we couldn’t in a million years have

Features Editor Anél Lewis • features@childmag.co.za Resource Editor Tamlyn Vincent • durban@childmag.co.za Editorial Assistant Lucille Kemp • lucille@childmag.co.za Copy Editor Debbie Hathway

Art Designers Mariette Barkhuizen • mariette@childmag.co.za Nikki-leigh Piper • nikki@childmag.co.za Alys Suter • studio1@childmag.co.za

Advertising Director Lisa Mc Namara • lisa@childmag.co.za

PUBLISHER’S PHOTOGRAPH: Brooke Fasani

Client Relations Natasha Whittaker • natashaw@childmag.co.za Lisa Waterloo • capetown@childmag.co.za

anticipated. Reading about keeping lines of communication open with your teenager, but keeping the door firmly closed on a messy room is, well, just that, reading. In real life, it’s really difficult. Parenting is definitely not for the faint-hearted – but the rewards, which are plentiful, make it worthwhile.

I look at them across the kitchen counter every morning and my eyes fill with tears; they are so beautiful and I am so honoured to be their mother.

If you love the magazine, you’ll love our website. Visit us at childmag.co.za

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Durban’s Child magazineTM is published monthly by Hunter House Publishing, PO Box 12002, Mill Street, 8010. Office address: 1st Floor,

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June 2011

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contents

june 2011

14 upfront

regulars

3

6

a note from lisa

7 upfront with paul

features

Paul Kerton believes we should teach our children to drink responsibly

10 how to fight right

i t’s not about if you fight, but how you fight. By Glynis Horning

19 resource – helping hands

a list of services that come to your house to make life easier for you.

Compiled by Tamlyn Vincent

14 island of the gods Lisa Mc Namara and her family discover beautiful Bali

24 a good read

16 x vs z – the new generation game

Rodney Weidemann finds out how generation X and generation Z can bridge the great divide

wins

new books for the whole family

26 what’s on in june 34 last laugh

Sam Wilson is the “child” in the car on family road trips

classified ads

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32 family marketplace 33 let’s party

health 8

swimming lessons

male infertility is on the increase.

By Tamlyn Vincent 9

healthy mom

Tamlyn Vincent asks the experts about a mom’s diet when breast-feeding

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this month’s cover images are supplied by:

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June 2011

Johannesburg

Cape Town

Durban

shutterstock.com

shutterstock.com

shutterstock.com

magazine durban

magazine durban

June 2011

5

wins

giveaways in june truly away from it all the renaissance of the beanbag FatSak is not a beanbag and you’ll soon realise this once you’ve sat in one. You’ll find the comfort to be incomparable and this is simply because it is filled with VitaFoam, not polystyrene balls, and covered in sumptuous fabrics. The FatSak is fun, stylish and functional. There are four sizes to suit any space and the covers are machine washable. To order online or to find a local retailer, contact 0861 999 122 or visit fatsak.co.za One reader of Durban’s Child stands a chance to win a small FatSak valued at R2 850. To enter, go to the website fatsak.co.za, click on “Win a FatSak DBN” and enter your details before 30 June 2011.

Only one entry per reader.

A picnic in the cave, a pony trek in the mountains and a hike along the river are a few of the activities on offer at Wyndford Farm. The holiday also includes three home-cooked meals a day.

Immensely charming and magical, Wyndford offers a forgotten way of living that promises to renew the connection with yourself, the people in your life and nature. Wyndford is surrounded by the unique formations of the Rooiberg Mountains in the Eastern Free State. For more information visit wyndford.co.za One reader of Durban’s Child stands a chance to win a two-night stay at Wyndford Farm valued at R3 880. The getaway is valid for two adults and two children under the age of 12 years and must be used before September 2011. Terms and conditions apply. Wyndford Farm is not licenced so the winner should take their own drinks. To enter, email your details to win@childmag.co.za with “Wyndford Win” in the subject line or post your entry to “Wyndford Win”, PO Box 12002, Mill Street, 8010 before 30 June 2011. Only one entry per reader.

congratulations to our April winners Audrey Thulseepersad and Lana Weideman who each win a Sonicare Toothbrush and Sumayya Kajee who wins a Preggi Bellies exercise course.

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June 2011

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upfront with paul

make mine a gin and tonic Teach your children to drink responsibly, advises PAUL KERTON.

PHOTOGRAPH: MARIETTE BARKHUIZEN

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ou are at a favourite pizza place, sat outside enjoying the dappled, retreating sunlight and early evening breeze. The children are picking through the menu and you order drinks. Your son or daughter – aged let’s say six or seven – has a guzzle of their own juice and then asks for a sip of your beer or wine; reaching their hand impishly towards your glass, “Purleeease Daddy”…

Here unfolds one of the greatest dilemmas and controversies of parenthood.

Do you say “No way, wait until you are 18 and can legally drink”, while slapping the child’s hand away, or do you say “Of course darling, but sip it slowly” and watch them like a hawk as they imbibe your amber, or crisp white, nectar?

It is odd that in most societies, men and women can legally get married at 16 but can’t legally toast their own marriage.

Personally, I do enjoy a beer or a glass of wine with my meal and don’t think it is such a big deal if my daughter has a sip of my drink. I look at those European families – particularly in Greece, Spain, France and Italy – where a small glass of wine is

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Saskia, Paul and Sabina

a traditional part of the Sunday lunch or evening meal, whatever the age. With my own brood, if we are having champagne to celebrate something, they will always have a “glass” even if the glass is the size of a thimble to start with. Alcohol is addictive, so there are always going to be certain individuals for whom one sip is never going to be enough. Just be aware of this.

I have friends who don’t drink at all and therefore neither do their children, which is fair enough. Although, abstinence and prohibition generally make something appear more attractive than it is. The other

extreme is that if you are crawling home from the pub every night the chances are your children will, eventually, do the same.

There is conflicting research on the subject with valid scientific, health and social arguments for both sides but my take on it is: teach them to drink responsibly and you will de-mystify the whole alcohol “theatre” and rituals that go with it. Then, when they do go out en masse into the teenage quagmire, they will have a responsible attitude to alcohol, instead of swilling shooters and binge-drinking, which leads to extreme drunkenness,

attendant vulnerability and sex issues. This has become an alarming epidemic in the UK – shocking beyond belief – particularly among girls, sometimes as young as 14, regularly being photographed literally lying in high street gutters late on a Friday night.

(It also regularly afflicts international rugby players who should know better.)

The trick is to be a good role model and promote responsible drinking habits.

Sip and savour as opposed to knocking back rounds, drinking in a “safe” and familiar environment with known friends and not performing any dangerous tasks (including driving) while drinking. This responsibility also includes real social skills like knowing how to say “no” to a drink without offending, and how to discreetly get rid of a drink if one is forced upon you – “oh go on have another one…” And on those rare occasions when you simply can’t be a good role model – stag nights, reunions, and Springbok call-up – get a family member to baby-sit and stay at a guesthouse.

Paul Kerton is the author of Fab Dad: A Man’s Guide to Fathering.

June 2011

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health

swimming lessons

g

etting pregnant – that should be fun. Most couples are excited about the chance to create life. But, for some, it isn’t fun. Many couples struggle to fall pregnant and male infertility is “growing massively” says fertility specialist Dr Colin La Grange, of the Life Centre in Durban. Why is this, and what can we do about it?

Infertility is “the inability to conceive after one year of unprotected intercourse,” says Cape Town-based obstetrician/gynaecologist and fertility specialist Dr Sascha Edelstein. He says that male infertility is “the sole factor in 20 to 30 percent of cases and a contributory factor in a further 25 to 50 percent.” Male infertility can be due to a number of factors: • low sperm count: anything less than 20 million per millilitre; • abnormal sperm morphology: this is most commonly seen relating to lower levels of testosterone, says La Grange. When sperm are abnormally shaped they are not able to move properly; • poor sperm motility: the sperm aren’t moving properly; • incorrect progression: sperm should move forward, rather than in a circle.

why might this be?

These factors can result from any number of causes.

“Childhood mumps with scrotal swelling (suggesting mumps orchitis) can cause sterility”, says Edelstein. Other reasons can include overheating of the testicles (which is why

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June 2011

TAMLYN VINCENT looks at male infertility and ways to improve your chances of conceiving.

undescended testicles can result in infertility), trauma to the testes, obstructions in the outflow tract, retrograde ejaculation (semen enters the bladder instead of moving out through the urethra), and impotence, adds Edelstein.

Prostate problems can also affect sperm motility, says La Grange. He also places emphasis on stress and diet, saying that when combined with stress, a poor diet can negatively affect the production of testosterone. “Chemicals in the environment,” says La Grange, “including those in detergents or shampoos, can impact fertility.” Having had a sexually transmitted disease (STD) can also affect fertility, as can using lubricants, “which can be toxic to sperm”, advises Edelstein.

watch points “In the majority of cases there are no signs to predict sterility,” says Edelstein, but there are several indicators, and men experiencing these should seek medical advice: • loss of libido; • discharge from the penis, suggesting an STD; • small testes: “the normal size is approximately that of a squash-ball,” notes Edelstein; • varicocele or enlarged veins in the scrotum, which can cause overheating, adds La Grange; • swollen, enlarged and painful testes.

In addition, men with a typical A-type personality are at high risk, says La Grange. “Stress and the production

of testosterone compete for the same resources.” When coping with stress is demanding too many of the body’s resources, insufficient testosterone is produced and sperm stop growing properly.

what can you do?

Some male-infertility causes can’t be changed, and some may need medical treatment. However, there are certain lifestyle adjustments that can improve fertility. Here are a few suggestions: • Quit smoking: “it has been shown to affect sperm DNA,” says Edelstein. Sperm take about three months to develop, so changes will only be noticed in time.

• Cut the junk out of your diet. Avoid things like coffee, alcohol, sugar, wheat, red meat and chocolate, recommends La Grange.

• “Obesity can cause erectile dysfunction, as well as reduce circulating testosterone,” says Edelstein.

• “Certain vitamins and nutrients – such as zinc, selenium, vitamins A and E, and omega supplements – can improve fertility,” says La Grange.

• Avoid drugs such as anabolic steroids or marijuana.

• Avoid overheating the testes. Heating does play a role, says La Grange, who finds that people who have a high body temperature, like those who eat lots of hot foods or sit in a hot car all day, can have more problems with poor quality sperm.

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health

healthy mom TAMLYN VINCENT looks into what to eat when breast-feeding.

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o, after nine months of waiting, you finally have your bundle of joy and you’re ready to start breastfeeding. If you’re a new mom, the nurse may offer you some helpful advice. Then your friends will give you their two cents’ worth; your sister-in-law and mother might also have something to add: “drink stout – it increases milk supply” or “avoid spicy food; it irritates the baby”. It’s hard to know which tips to take on and which to ignore…

To help breast-feeding mothers, we chatted to the experts and have put together some guidelines to assist you in deciding what to eat and what to avoid when breast-feeding.

PHOTOGRAPH: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM

think again Some foods can cause trouble when passed on through breast milk: • Stay away from “anything that is gas forming, including broccoli, cauliflower, onion and green peas,” suggests Sister Arlette Blaylock, who runs the Gentle Touch Clinic in Durban. Other culprits are spicy foods, caffeine and chocolate.

• Coffee, tea and alcohol act as stimulants, and are “known to cause negative effects on babies’ nervous systems,” says Marié Petrelis, a nutritional therapist at Path2Health in Johannesburg.

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• Alcohol should be avoided as it “goes into maternal milk” and takes a “full hour to pass”, says Blaylock.

But avoiding everything that could potentially be an issue might leave you with little to eat. Moms should eliminate foods once they cause problems, suggests Blaylock.

“Being conscious of the food you are eating and observing any negative effects these may have on your baby is really important,” says Petrelis. She suggests keeping a food diary if your baby is experiencing problems, which could include anything from wind to colic or eczema.

go for it Here are some good food tips for breast-feeding moms: • Eat plenty of “fresh fruit and vegetables,” says Petrelis: the more variety and colour mom gets, the more nutrients baby gets.

• Rather eat whole grains (brown rice or wholegrain breads and pastas), which have more nutrients than white, refined grains.

• Oily fish is brain food for babies, says Petrelis, who recommends moms eat a variety of fish such as salmon, sardines or tuna three times a week.

• “It is important to drink enough fluid,” says Blaylock, who recommends at least two litres of water a day, plus a glass of water before, during and after each

feed. “Not drinking enough fluid can cause inadequate milk supply,” says Petrelis. Other good drinks are fruit juices (in moderation), especially berry juices, and certain herbal teas – these can be calming and can aid digestion.

useful tips • You should take pregnancy or post-pregnancy vitamins.

• Cabbage leaves can help to relieve engorgement.

“Crush them to release the enzymes and then pack them into your bra,” says Petrelis. Feeding on demand can also help to regulate milk production, and ease engorgement.

• To keep your blood sugar levels even, Petrelis suggests “eating small meals with regular snacks that include some form of protein”. Go for healthy, nutritious foods, and meals that you can make ahead of time – cook more than you need and freeze portions for another day. “A wholegrain sandwich with avo and hummus is great when there is just no time for anything else,” says Petrelis.

• “Get skin to skin contact as soon after birth as possible”, as this helps with bonding and latching with your baby, and encourages successful breast-feeding, says Blaylock.

June 2011

9

parenting

how to fight right

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y late parents were wonderful, loving people but they fought fiercely. It tore me up and put me off marriage for years. When I eventually relented with a wonderful, loving man of my own, we vowed not to fight when we had children. We did, of course. We’re human – we get tired and impatient, and children provide fertile new grounds for disagreement. So we settled for just trying to fight right.

Now reassuring research shows this is all that parents need to do. Conflict is inevitable in any relationship over time, and children can benefit from seeing their parents disagreeing “and even being mildly angry”, says psychologist Patrick Davies, co-author of a major US study published in the Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry. “It gives them

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June 2011

a lesson on how you can come to a mutually acceptable solution through compromise.” Adds fellow psychologist and researcher, E Mark Cummings, “Children actually are not disturbed by it if there are sincere efforts to problem solve. They are happy to see the parents work it out.”

Past research has focused on destructive conflict, and has clearly shown that this affects children’s emotional wellbeing, making them more prone to aggression, bad behaviour, anxiety, sleep problems and depression. A study measuring children’s stress levels while they watched their parents fight showed that their heart rates, breathing and sweat-gland activity all rose.

The US study looked at families where parental conflict was more constructive. It found that in time, these children

grew psychologically healthier and showed more “prosocial” behaviour. “They tended to be friendly to other children, to be empathetic when others were upset, and to show concerns for moral issues and for the fairness and wellness of others,” Davies concluded.

the prizes The advantages of fighting right are obvious to Karin Steyn, a Johannesburg-based counselling psychologist who works with children, and is a young mother herself.

“It’s our job as parents to teach children the skills they need to cope in life, and disagreeing constructively is one of them,” she says. “It’s unrealistic to think you’ll find a partner one day and always be happy and never

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ILLUSTRATIONS: MARIETTE BARKHUIZEN, shutterstock.com

All parents disagree, and how we do it can harm our children – or help them. GLYNIS HORNING reports.

have problems. But often children grow up with that idea because they never saw their parents fight. As adults, they have issues about expressing emotions.”

They’re shocked to learn that fighting is a normal part of a relationship, that it’s not a problem, and won’t lead to the destruction of their relationship, says Steyn. “They panic and assume that something is wrong with them and their marriage. In fact, fighting is normal and healthy, and it’s needed to grow a relationship.”

All emotions are normal and healthy, she explains, including those often seen as bad – anger, hurt, disappointment. “It’s what you do with them that is important.” If you suppress them, they can emerge in corrosive passive-aggression or in physical ills, from heart

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Fighting is normal and healthy, and it’s needed to grow a relationship. conditions to cancers. “You need to model for children how to manage emotions, so they can develop as individuals and be able to assert and stand up for themselves, and withstand peer pressure.”

Children raised in families where parents repress feelings and don’t fight grow up frightened of conflict, says Steyn. They become over-anxious in new situations,

so they avoid them, depriving themselves of opportunities in life. They are afraid to express themselves because they think they will be ostracised or punished, and won’t be loved any more. So they repress their feelings and become like pressure-cookers, waiting to explode. “These are the people who say ‘I don’t know what happened, it just overwhelmed me, I blacked out and lost control.’”

the pitfalls But fighting right can be tricky. “Most conflict is about winning, and we tend to try and win at all costs,” says Johannesburg-based clinical psychologist and couples counsellor Ian Lipman. “This often means that we get ‘personal’, saying things that we don’t necessarily intend

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parenting

and that are personally damaging. For children to experience this is destructive, as they may begin to see you or your partner based on this, rather than the reality.”

If you fight fair and clean, and disagree rather than attack each other, “you model that differences are okay and a natural part of life, and the appropriate way to deal with them,” he says. But there are still times when it’s better to wait until children are asleep or out of the house before discussing your differences. Financial or marital problems, and issues with in-laws or with the children themselves are best dealt with in private.

Fights about financial and marital problems threaten children’s sense of security, warns Margery Rosen, author of Can This Marriage Be Saved? (Workman Publishing Company). If there are money problems, you can let them know money is tight, but reassure them you have enough to take care of them, she advises.

With marital problems, even if you agree to fight away from children there will

anxiety until you know for sure and have a plan, she says.

“Bottom line is that we all fight, and learning to do it right is important not just for the children but for your marriage,” concludes Steyn. “Research shows couples who fight have healthier and happier relationships that last longer. We all have issues that won’t just go away if we leave them. Being able to confront them and resolve them is a sign of emotional maturity – it shows you are in control of your life.”

fighting right Fighting is linked to our survival instinct and is a part of life. We strengthen our relationships and give children valuable life skills when we fight right: • Fight honestly – acknowledge and name your emotions (anger, hurt, disappointment), and take responsibility for how you express them.

• Use words, not actions – no slamming doors, throwing or pounding things.

Children actually are not disturbed by it if there are sincere efforts to problem solve. invariably be flare-ups, and they will still sense the tension – however much you pretend to get along. Explain that you love each other even when you fight, that the happiest couples disagree and arguments are part of life, says Lipman. “Tell them the argument is between Mom and Dad, and doesn’t involve them – children should not be drawn into adult affairs.”

Fighting in front of children when the fight is about them can leave them assuming responsibility for the problem and feeling guilty, he says, or it can allow them to manipulate you if the disagreement concerns discipline. And fighting about inlaws threatens their sense of family – these are their grandparents, remember.

Rosen is also against fighting in front of children about things you fear “may” happen, such as moving home or losing your job. Don’t put them through the

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• If you lose your temper, admit it and walk away to regain control – “I’m going to take 10 to calm down.” When children lose their tempers, use timeouts to help them do this too.

• Later, analyse the feelings behind the fury – was it fear, hurt, envy, guilt, a need to be right or in control? Are you just tired, stressed, hormonal? Or do you need to unpack them with a professional?

• Develop a release valve such as jogging, gardening or baking, and help children develop one too – walking the dog with you, tearing or crumpling paper.

• Practise relaxing, and show the children how – meditate, listen to music, watch comedy shows and off-load with friends.

Invite children to share their feelings with you.

• As a family, talk about anger, and how different people express it. Help

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children identify it in themselves by “reflecting” it for them – “You look angry because you’re clenching your fists; is that what you’re feeling?”

• Have a “catchword” you, your partner and the children can use when you feel things are getting out of control, suggests Lipman. “It should act as a handbrake – both parties should stop immediately and take time out or continue in a more respectful fashion.”

• Watch volume (keep it down), tone (sarcasm scars), and language (avoid insults and demeaning names); and focus on the action not the person.

“No naming, blaming or shaming,” says Steyn.

• Communicate clearly, and check that you properly grasp what your partner means – no making assumptions or jumping to conclusions. Paraphrase what they say and reflect it back: “When you say that, do you mean…?”

• Hear them out – listen without interruption or judgment until they feel understood. “Consensus comes when parties feel they have been heard and respected, not necessarily agreed with,” says Lipman. “Listening validates your partner and shows you respect them.”

• Use “I” statements – “When you do X, I feel Y” – and avoid generalising or catastrophising the situation – “you always”; “you never”.

• Spell out clearly what you would like – “I feel disrespected when you don’t ring to tell me you’re running late, please call next time.”

• Never ask children to choose sides or referee – they don’t want to know

who is right or who is wrong, they just want you to love each other and not to fight destructively.

• Never talk about leaving each other – it threatens children’s sense of security.

• Be sensitive to signs of stress in children – acting out, withdrawing, stomachaches, headaches, sleep problems and overeating.

• Don’t look to win, but to negotiate a compromise. Think of arguments as simply problems to be solved, says Rosen, and let children see there’s more than one solution.

• Be aware that we sometimes fight worse in front of our children, because we don’t want to look bad. Get a grip.

• Always make up in front of them, or tell them when you have, and show your affection as a couple. “Apologising, accepting fault and forgiving teaches our children responsibility and breaks the myth and expectation of perfection,” says Lipman.

• If you still struggle to fight right, get help. See a psychologist or call Famsa: 031 202 8987, 021 447 7951, or the Family Life Centre: 011 788 4784.

how children react Fighting in front of children can affect their sense of security and the confidence they need to explore the world, says researcher E Mark Cummings, co-author of Children and Marital Conflict: An Emotional Security Perspective (Guilford Press). How we handle conflict is critical whatever your child’s age.

Under two: “Even six-month-olds are acutely sensitive to all types of conflict,” says Cummings. They may not understand what is said, but they experience distress when their prime sources of comfort yell at each other.

Tip: Tone it down, hug each other and them, and say “It’s fine, we still love each other.”

Two to seven: Toddlers and preschoolers see themselves as the centre of the universe and when you fight they can think it’s because of something they’ve done.

Tip: Reassure them that everyone has differences; this is not about them, and you still love each other.

Seven and older: School children often fear the worst and think you’re heading for divorce. Their school work, behaviour and health can suffer.

Tip: Acknowledge you are having a disagreement, reassure them that you’re working at resolving it and that you still love each other. Show them with gestures of affection.

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getaway

island of the gods LISA MC NAMARA discovers that there’s plenty for the whole family to enjoy in beautiful Bali.

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hose in the know don’t recommend visiting Bali in January — it’s hot and humid, it rains and many Asians and Australians are on holiday, so resorts and beaches can be crowded. However, I was invited to attend a work function in Nusa Dua, South Bali and managed to convince my husband and youngest that a three-day visit to a country we had never been to would be worth the very long flight. Robyn, who is nine and an intrepid traveller, took little convincing but my husband required some work. The joy of landing on a notyet-visited continent and experiencing vastly different landscapes, people, food and culture proved to be worth every minute of the round trip.

My travel book, Bali and Lombok (DK Eyewitness Travel) sets the scene: “Hilltops and mountain gods are both prominent in

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Balinese legend. The landscape of the islands has deeply influenced their cultural, political and economic life for thousands of years. Old traditions have persisted remarkably, despite the successive impacts of colonialism, political strife and the travel industry”. Most of the Balinese are Hindu

corner, but there are sometimes as many as four or five passengers – often with groceries and even a caged white rabbit – perched atop.

We escaped the mayhem of the roads for the sanctuary of the Club Med resort in Nusa Dua where we were to be hosted.

The scenery and rich cultural sites deserve a month or two to really take them in and I dream of going back, this time for an extended stay. and we were in awe of their religious fervour. From offerings to processions – there seemed to be a ceremony on every street, every day. On the subject of streets: driving in Bali is scary. Not only are there hundreds of motorbikes on every street

To be honest, Club Med Bali is not a resort; it’s more of a world on its own and offers the perfect holiday for families with award-winning children’s facilities.

They know that parents want time to relax and they understand that young

children and teenagers have very different holiday expectations. Qualified and enthusiastic G.Os® (“gentil organisers”) look after the children. Club Med would not be complete without its G.Os®, described as young, enthusiastic and child-loving. Your children, provided with entertainment, naps, specially prepared meals and everyday comforts, play happily and safely while you relax at the pool or beach.

For the older, somewhat fearless children who want to try out everything, the Mini Club offers amazing activities and adventures. Robyn took to snorkelling and the trapeze with some trepidation, but much enthusiasm, thoroughly enjoying them both. But she was just as happy swimming in the sea or the huge swimming pool. While I visited the spa for its signature

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PHOTOGRAPHS: club med bali, Lisa mc namara

Tanah Lot Temple

Four Hands treatment, my husband read on his lounger, knowing that Robyn’s safety was taken care of by two vigilant lifeguards, one at either end of the pool.

When I saw the Australian moms going off to lunch leaving their children swimming in the pool (with their “rashies” on), I knew the lifeguards had to be good!

I was sad that Julian wasn’t along for the ride as Club Med offers teenagers freedom and excitement in a safe environment. There is no lifting to parties or worrying about alcohol, as the resort has shows and discos every night and a strict no under 18 drinking rule. They also have everything you need for land and aqua sports and teens are able to have a dream holiday with their own group of new friends from all over the world.

Sadly, our three days flew by. Robyn took part in a number of Mini Club events, and particularly enjoyed the traditional Balinese fashion show, the Michael Jackson extravaganza and the Circus Show put on by the amazingly talented and energetic G.Os®. South Bali is a good base for further exploration, so on our last day we ventured into the country and spent a hot and humid morning visiting the Temple of Tanah Lot and the surrounding rice fields. The scenery and rich cultural sites deserve a month or two to really take them in and I dream of going back, this time for an extended stay.

when to go Bali is just a few degrees south of the equator and the average temperature hovers around the 30°C mark. The rain season is between October and March, although it mostly rains in the evenings giving you balmy, sunny days. The best time to go, however, is during their dry season from April to September.

health checks Vaccines It’s strongly suggested that you get vaccines for hepatitis A and typhoid fever. Older people and people with a compromised immune system should also get a flu vaccine. If you are planning on staying in Bali for an extended holiday, you might also want to talk to your health care practitioner about shots for hepatitis

magazine durban

B, Japanese encephalitis and rabies (transmitted from monkey bites.)

Malaria The tourist areas in Bali are generally risk-free, but if you plan on visiting the rural areas it’s wise to take precaution.

Ask your health care practitioner for the best medical option. In general, use insect repellent daily and wear lightweight, longsleeved clothing.

Water “Bali belly” has a reputation of monumental proportions. Stay on the safe side and drink only bottled water and use it to brush your teeth.

what to wear Wearing too little clothing outside hotels and well-defined tourist spots might cause offence. Here are some tips: • Light-weight natural fabrics • When visiting sacred sites, dress accordingly • Wear long-sleeved, light-weight clothing to avoid mosquito bites • Sarongs are a winner to cover up beach wear

how to get there We flew courtesy of Air Malaysia and found their staff, service and planes to be first-class. Visit malaysiaairlines.com.

where to stay We stayed at the recently refurbished, four-trident rated Club Med Bali. The resort is surrounded by the Java Sea and Indian Ocean and a 30-minute transfer is available from Denpasar Airport. Package deals from 13 August 2011 to October 2011 are: Johannesburg R12 715 plus taxes (R3 280) Durban R14 850 plus taxes (R3 245) Cape Town R14 270 plus taxes (R3 690).

High season supplements apply from 24 September 2011 to 28 October 2011 For more info, contact 011 840 2600

family fun in Bali Go shopping, make a traditional offering, watch a traditional Balinese show and play at Kuta Beach. Other sights include the Sacred Monkey Forest, the Bali Elephant Park and Turtle Island.

special note It is advisable to do research on the country you are planning to visit and to learn more about that country’s political climate. Especially remote destinations should be well researched. The Australian government has posted advice on their website for Aussies planning on travelling to this part of Asia. For more info, visit smartraveller.gov. au/zw-cgi/view/advice/indonesia

Clockwise from top left: a Candi Bentar (split gate); Robyn in Balinese dress; Club Med Bali pool and bar; G.O.® in action; Traditional Asian fare; Balinese dancer

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parenting

X vs Z

the new generation game Parenting has always been challenging, but with our children growing up in a techno-saturated world, so different to the one in which we were youngsters, the gap can feel enormous. RODNEY WEIDEMANN

changing of the guard These differences can leave children and parents worlds apart and, whenever there are large age gaps, conflict of one form or another will exist. According to Anel Annandale, an educational psychologist at Summit College in Kyalami, conflicts and misunderstandings between generations X and Z mainly tend to revolve around different expectations.

“Generation Z children are used to instant gratification, and might not think it unfair to expect that their parents meet their demands for material goods the instant they express them. Conflict may also arise when the more environmentally aware gen z-ers place pressure on their parents to change their habits, scolding them for their previously accepted wasteful nature,” she says.

“In addition, generation Z lives in a virtual world, where it’s possible to connect with any number of friends around the globe. Despite this, they are very likely to be lacking in areas of verbal communication, confidence and interpersonal skills.” She points out that where generation X would likely have been more comfortable hanging out with their friends at someone’s house, generation Z will more likely hang out in cyberspace. The problem with online socialising is that it can leave children unsure and insecure in face-to-face social situations.

“Gen Z will therefore require a lot of encouragement in social situations and may be very anxious about their academic achievements. As parents, it is important that you help your children set realistic goals, while offering plenty of encouragement and positive feedback,” says Annandale.

guilt and realise that the need for boundaries and rules remains just as strong as it ever was,” she says.

“It is also important that parents make the effort to spend quality time with their children, even if it is only a few hours a week. Spending time in a technology-free environment, where you can communicate face-to-face, is vital if you want to ensure your child feels valued,” says Glen-Spyron.

She says that it is also important to treat your children as individuals. This will help to boost their self-esteem.

Individuality, says Glen-Spyron, should be encouraged by parents in order to balance out the group culture that pervades social media. Parents must ensure that their children are made aware of the positive aspects of being an individual, as well as the benefits that come from belonging to a group.

technological boundaries Annandale states that when it comes to technology, parents have a simple choice – get with it or lose out. The availability of alternative means of communication, such as email, sms, MXit and Facebook, offers savvy generation X parents a variety of ways to communicate, connect and relate to their children.

“Of course, this must still be done within reason. In my practice, I often come across parents who are way too involved in their children’s personal lives. Just because

social media enables you to chat to all your child’s friends and see what they are up to all the time, doesn’t mean that it is okay to do so,” she says.

A further point of potential conflict exists because the parent’s desire to protect their child from potential online predators is at odds with the child’s urge for online independence, says Glen-Spyron.

“Parents should implement rules that provide boundaries in which the children can explore their limits while still feeling safe and contained. By giving children choices that are age appropriate – and boundaries in which to express these – parents enable them to develop their sense of self-control within a protected zone, one in which the parent is still there to help them, if needed.”

Robyn Slade, 35, from Randburg, has an 11-year-old stepson and is a firm believer in the benefits of technology.

A self-confessed gadget-geek, she says that technology is the future and believes that it must be open to children, otherwise they won’t be able to develop the skills necessary to cope with life in the 21st century. “We allow Joshua to have a cellphone, but not one that has internet access, as we feel he is too young for that. A suitably protected internet connection, which still allows him to research his own projects is also fine. However, a Facebook or Twitter profile would not be allowed until he is older and can fully understand the dangers of online predators,” she says.

Cellphones, the internet, social media and satellite television are as normal to this generation as riding bikes and climbing trees were for their parents.

PHOTOGRAPHS AND ILLUSTRATIONS: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM

o

ften referred to as the generation that refused to grow up, generation X has finally come of age in the 21st century – becoming the parents of the dot.com children who make up generation Z. Their children are of an entirely new millennium. The child whose birth date falls between 1995 and 2009 was born into and raised with technology. Cellphones, the internet, social media and satellite television are as normal to them as riding bikes and climbing trees were for their parents.

helps you bridge the divide.

quality time Charine Glen-Spyron, a clinical psychologist at Bella Vida Centre in Bryanston, points out that too much time online can stunt a child’s emotional intelligence, due to a lack of face-to-face communication.

“Generation X households often consist of dual-income families, meaning the parents do not spend as much time with their children as they would like. Because of this, they often overcompensate by being more lenient in terms of the child’s online activities. Parents need to let go of their

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magazine durban

magazine durban

June 2011

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parenting

Charlene Goncalves, 38, from Bassonia, is a single mother of two who says that she was quite reluctant to give her children cellphones, but she realised that it is virtually a necessity for children today. “The internet is also essential these days, but one has to be very careful and vigilant about what sites are being visited. Parents need to be quite open with their children, letting them know about the dangers that exist on social networks. My opinion is that we can’t deny our children the use of technology – we have to embrace it and learn as much about it as we can for their sake. It does, however, make me feel that our children are forced to grow up a little too quickly,” says Charlene.

the family brand Nikki Bush, creative parenting expert and co-author of the book Future-Proof Your Child: Parenting the Wired Generation (Penguin), says that generation Z will be very info-wise, with a unique understanding of technology. This is because it is something that has always been a part of their lives. At the same time, they will place a higher emphasis on experiences than they will on school grades.

As they get older, their value of experiences is likely to see them travelling the world or possibly joining a socially conscious effort in a foreign country or underprivileged area. However, in childhood it falls to the parents to provide these experiences.

“For this reason, it is important that parents create genuine experiences – whether this is special family time, specific outings or focused playtime – that will give this new generation the encounters it craves,” says Bush.

“Generation Z is also growing up in a world where it is constantly assaulted by brand images. If we are to help our children develop their own identity and moral compass, we need to have our own message – a family brand – that

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June 2011

can directly compete with the many other messages our children receive from the media. If parents don’t respond by offering strong values of their own, the family brand may become lost amid the clutter of the numerous other messages screaming for our children’s attention,” she says.

Bush says that to avoid generational conflict parents must make their family brand the one that their children aspire to. This should be done by providing them with a set of values and beliefs against which they can judge the messages streaming in from the outside. After all, no parent wants their child to appropriate values or morals from an external source, particularly when the current “cult of celebrity” makes idols out of people like Paris Hilton and Kanye West.

She says that by shifting the focus away from what makes us anxious as parents, and instead focusing on what is best for the child, we can avoid many of the clashes that are otherwise inevitable in the growing-up process. “Parents need to stand back and allow their children to explore, to fall over and skin their knees, or even on occasion, to be angry with their mom and dad. Children need to be given the space to explore the sense of wonder that only exists in childhood, and if that means they sometimes get hurt, then that is what must be allowed to happen,” says Glen-Spyron.

“Remember that an adult climbs a tree and when they reach the top they think: it’s a long way to fall, whereas a child gets to the top and thinks: look how far I can see,” says Glen-Spyron. “That is the fundamental difference parents should remember when this gap seems unbridgeable.”

golden rule Annandale believes that the most important thing is to talk to your children, to listen to them and to lead by example.

If parents want their children to learn decent values, they must be prepared to teach them.

“Don’t just sit them down in front of the TV or computer and expect them to learn these values on their own. Watch with them, learn with them and discuss with them what behaviour or actions you approve or did not approve of; discuss alternative behaviour or actions. I often hear complaints from parents that their children have no patience – I wonder how many of these parents have had the patience to teach this virtue to their children?” says Annandale.

“I think that the golden rule when it comes to raising generation Z is the same as it would be for any other generation: the parent needs to realise that it is not about their feelings, it is about the child. They should therefore always ask whether what they are doing is in the best interests of the child,” adds Glen-Spyron.

generation Z under the microscope • G eneration Z children were born between 1995 and 2009.

• They are largely the children of generation X. • T hey have grown up with technology and are the most technologically literate generation, hence their being referred to as “digital natives”.

• They tend to be the children of older, wealthier parents and have fewer siblings.

• They generally have short attention spans and are very impatient, desiring instant results.

• They tend to be very altruistic, placing a strong emphasis on issues such as tolerance, the environment, the underprivileged and social justice.

magazine durban

resource

helping hands Exhausted, overwhelmed and in need of some help at home?

TAMLYN VINCENT has compiled a list of useful services that will come to you.

baby

au pair and nanny agencies See box on page 23

breast-feeding support

PHOTOGRAPHS: shutterstock.com

Babies on Beachway Baby clinic offering initial home consults to moms of newborns.

Get advice on breast-feeding, sleep issues and the introduction of foods. Durban North to Umhlanga. Contact Arlaine Oxenham: 082 651 9719 Carol’s Breast-feeding Clinic If you have difficulties with breast-feeding, Carol helps you in the comfort of your own home.

Antenatal and postnatal counselling and advice also given. Medela breast pumps and accessories available. Upper Highway.

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Contact Carol: 031 763 5262, 083 794 4030 or carol.thomas259@gmail.com Dr Taryn Turner A holistic well baby clinic offering home visits and consults on homeopathic solutions, vaccination alternatives and lactation support. Greater Durban. Contact: 084 455 5529 or visit drmom.co.za Mommy Bear and Baby Clinic Antenatal classes, breast-feeding advice and help for moms with bath time, routines and more.

Berea to Umhlanga. Contact Chantal: 079 515 6058 or chantal@mghuggins.co.za The Baby Wise Clinic Offers well baby assessments, including weighing, and advice on routines, solids, stimulation and breast-feeding. Sister Tori Westley will do

home visits on request. Upper Highway.

Contact: 082 847 4981 or westley@dbn. stormnet.co.za The Mother’s Clinic Offers advice on breast-feeding, routine, sleep issues and diet. They also do weighing, immunisations and more and will come to your house if necessary. La Lucia. Contact: 031 562 8933

sleep therapists and trainers Baby Love and Toddler Love They offer routine and sleep guidance workshops and individual sessions for pregnant couples and parents of children four and younger in your home. From Umhlanga to Hillcrest.

Contact Jacqui Flint: 082 851 2141 or jacqui@baby-love.co.za

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resource

child

au pair and nanny agencies See box on page 23

tutors A Plus Assessment and Tuition Individual or group tuition provided, and computer literacy is offered to primary school children.

Tutors can travel throughout Durban.

Contact: 031 209 5610 or 072 421 7971 Education Matters South Africa Qualified, screened tutors travel to learner’s homes for one-on-one tuition, in all subjects from primary school to tertiary levels. Contact Sheelagh: 083 417 5419, info@educationmatters.co.za or visit educationmatters.co.za Hire Education Tutoring in the comfort of your own home. For primary school, high school and university learners, and for all subjects and grades. Contact: 0861 288 867, info@hireeducation.co.za or visit hireeducation.co.za Penguin Home Tutoring KZN Private home tuition for children of all ages. Extra lessons available for all school subjects and you can customise lessons to suit your child’s needs. Greater Durban. Contact Jessica: 079 161 2740, durban@penguintutoring. co.za or visit penguintutoring.co.za Teach me 2 School and music tuition in your home by highly qualified and reliable tutors. All subjects offered, from accounting to Zulu. Also, music and voice training. Contact: 0861 832 246, info@ teachme2.co.za or visit teachme2.co.za

and shipping rates. Contact Natalie: 021 863 0336 or visit ewine.co.za Pick n Pay Shop online for groceries, back to school items, household products and more. Gifts, flowers and online recipes also available. Nationwide delivery. Contact: 0860 303 030 or visit pnponline.co.za Simply Organic Fresh, seasonal and organic produce is delivered to your door.

The baby and toddler bags offer a variety of foods ideal for pureeing. Durban North, Umhlanga, North Coast. Contact: 074 110 9049, dawn@simply-organic.co.za or visit simply-organic.co.za Wine of the Month Explore the tastes of the world with monthly deliveries of top quality wines by the case. You can also join The Olive Club, Whiskey Club, Brandy Club or Coffee Club. Nationwide delivery.

Contact: 0861 11 WINE (9463) or visit wineofthemonth.co.za Woolworths Food and wine, beauty products, baby goodies, clothing, home products and more, available online.

Delivery to most Durban suburbs. Contact: 0860 100 987 or visit woolworths.co.za

ready-made meals

food

online shopping Best of the Midlands Supplies a variety of produce, including hormone-free meats, and free-range eggs and dairy.

You can also order ready-made meals, biscuits, desserts and jams. Delivery to Durban and Pietermaritzburg. Contact Cassie: 083 749 1066, Ian: 083 326 5488, orders@bestofthemidlands.co.za or visit bestofthemidlands.co.za Cybercellar Choose your wine, by estate or by type, and have it delivered to your door nationwide or worldwide. Contact: 0860 SAWINE (729463), info@cybercellar. com or visit cybercellar.com eWine Online retail company specialising in selling South African wines. Situated in Paarl, they deliver wine all over SA and internationally. See the website for details

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June 2011

Lola Likes Healthy home-cooked meals for babies, toddlers and children. Meals are delivered frozen in microwave-safe containers. Durban North, Berea and surrounding areas. Contact Tamara: 072 820 2031, tamara@lolalikes.co.za or visit lolalikes.co.za Made by Leila Fresh, home-made baby meals with no salt or preservatives. Sold frozen in portioned cubes. Ballito and Umhlanga. Contact Leila: 083 353 5562 or madebyleila@gmail.com Meals made with love Provides a variety of frozen meals such as curries, stews and pastas, all made with wholesome ingredients. Party platters and tarts also available. Delivery to Durban North and surrounds. Friday delivery to Morningside and surrounds. Contact Charmaine: 031 564 3244, 082 717 8782 or johnchar@ webstorm.co.za My Chef Order ready-made meals or meal kits, where you get everything you need to make your meal. Choose from a wide variety magazine durban

including vegetarian and children’s meals.

Deliveries are on Tuesday (for the weekday menu) and Fridays (for the weekend menu).

Greater Durban. Contact: 0861 MYCHEF (692433) or visit mychef.co.za Thyme Square Café Makes and delivers home-made meals, including oxtail stew, Thai green chicken curry or macaroni and cheese. Meals vary daily, or place an order 24 hours in advance. Delivery to Upper Highway. Contact: 031 765 4028, 082 958 6855 or thymesquarecafe@telkomsa.net

health and beauty beauty therapists

Beauty In Motion Beauty treatments for groups of ladies, at your home.

Treatments include facials, manicures and pedicures, and massages. Greater Durban. Contact Michelle: 083 785 6044 or beautyinmotion@eca.co.za Bella Couture A beauty salon that offers gel and acrylic nail enhancements, manicures, pedicures and make-up application.

They can travel to clients depending on requirements. Musgrave. Contact: 079 368 4455 or vereeshadwarika@yahoo.com Nail Technician Emelia offers OPI manicures and pedicures, gel and acrylic tips and overlays. Areas include Durban North, La Lucia, Morningside, Redhill and Umhlanga.

Contact: 031 564 7734, 083 782 0777 or aquamassage.e@gmail.com Studio CanBri A range of treatments including manicures, pedicures, facials and waxing, plus eyelash and Micro ring hair extensions. Highway area. Contact: 031 702 8245 or 084 455 5115

life and yoga instructors Andrea Gossman Body Talk Practitioner offers holistic counselling and natural healthcare to moms and babies. This is designed to help with mental or emotional imbalances and allergies. Greater Durban. Contact: 082 894 5123 or visit eventhorizons.co.za Indian Ocean Yoga Ashtanga yoga classes in your home, tailored to suit your needs.

Classes accommodate up to four people and are suitable for all levels. Kloof, Durban, Umhlanga. Contact Heather Tyrrell: 083 764 0752 or heather@indianoceanyoga.co.za People Activ Frances Light offers life coaching and Reiki to moms and teenagers. Contact: 082 564 9011 or frances@peopleactiv.com

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massage therapists Authentic massage service Leanne Hainne is a qualified and experienced massage therapist who offers a portable service. She also offers mind, body and soul therapy. Morningside/Windermere.

Contact: 031 303 1632 or 082 758 1411 Liesl Krull A qualified therapeutic aromatherapist offering varied treatments, from foot to full body massages, or manicures and pedicures. Botha’s Hill to Durban. Contact: 031 702 6737, 082 922 4535, liesl@krull.co.za or visit krull.co.za Mobile Massage Service Offers a range of massage options from aromatherapy to Swedish massage and Acupressure.

Sessions vary from 1 to 5 hours. Durban and surrounds. Contact: 072 150 1450, portablemassage@gmail.com or visit mobilemassagedurban.webs.com Return To Glory – Mobile Massage and Beauty Specialists They have a range of massages and treatments to choose from, including aromatherapy massage, reflexology or facials, all in your own home.

Greater Durban. Contact Lisa Maytham: 073 575 7264, returntoglorysa@gmail.com or visit returntoglorysa.co.za

personal trainers Alvina Wilkes A mobile personal trainer who trains you in the comfort of your home. Areas include Essenwood, Glenwood, Morningside, Musgrave and Overport. Contact: 072 141 1968 or alvina.wilkes@gmail.com Bonz fit Have one-on-one or small group classes with a trainer who is passionate about getting moms healthy and fit.

From Umhlanga to Morningside, up to Hillcrest. Contact: 083 262 9964 or bonz@ absamail.co.za GI Jane Weight loss, toning and pregnancy training, plus makeovers for moms and children’s training. Greater Durban.

Contact: 082 891 1016 or visit gijane.co.za One on One Fitness Offers a range of fitness solutions in the comfort of your home, from prenatal and postnatal training, to sports conditioning, weight loss, toning and general fitness. Track your progress online. Plus lifestyle advice from dieticians, physiotherapists and more. Greater Durban. Contact the head office: 011 447 6722, info@oneononefitness.co.za or visit 1on1fitness.co.za The Mobile Personal Trainer They are results-driven and specialise in body

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resource

transformations. Various workouts are available. Also includes a complimentary customised diet. Greater Durban. Contact: kerry@themobilepersonaltrainer.co.za or visit themobilepersonaltrainer.co.za Tone@Home Brings the gym to you. They specialise in pre- and post-pregnancy training, plus training for children and couples. Highway area. Contact Tarryn: 076 296 9923 or tarryn.roberts@gmail.com

home and garden garden services

AB’s Garden Services Their services include cleaning gardens, tree felling and plot clearing on the North Coast. Contact Betty: 079 513 5996 Bugz and Beez Garden Services Offers supervised once-off cleanups, garden refuse removal and garden service maintenance in the Highway area. Contact: 084 951 1972

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June 2011

Creative Garden Services and Landscaping A qualified landscaper who also offers a garden service and once-off cleanups. Durban North. Contact Gregg: 031 563 0855, 082 568 1186 or creativegardenskzn@ gmail.com Earth Landscapes and Garden Care A garden service that pays attention to detail, and caters to your individual needs.

Durban, Westville, Durban North.

Contact Sean: 083 396 9705 or admin@ earthgardencare.co.za or Ross: 083 796 9705 or ross@earthlandscapes.co.za Handyboyz Provides garden maintenance, plus handyman services, including plumbing, painting and high pressure cleaning. Westville to Umhlanga. Contact: 083 776 5075 Pro-Turf A lawn specialist service that offers lawn maintenance, weed control and treatment for termites and mole crickets.

Also provides garden services, mowing, irrigation, tree felling, maintenance and more. Contact Gerhard: 082 922 2673 or pro-turf@telkomsa.net Ridge Garden Services Weekly and fortnightly garden service by a supervised team. Services include mowing, pruning, edging and removal. Pool service available.

Durban North to Umhlanga. Contact Roma: 083 543 1523 or Neren: 082 775 1006 SuperVision Garden Ser vices Supervised garden services specialising

in garden maintenance, garden refuse removal, cleanups, tree felling, bush clearing and landscaping. Hillcrest to Westville. Contact Martin: 031 762 3155 or 083 962 6836

personal organisers iOrganise Lifestyle management and errand running. They will organise your task lists and errands, plus de-clutter your home.

They’ll help you move, pack, label and more.

Durban and Durban North. Contact: 031 569 2129, 074 166 0023, nikki@iorganise.co.za or visit iorganise.co.za Neat Freak They will help you organise your space as well as manage your time,.

Have an online consultation. Contact: 082 673 9740, neatfreak@telkomsa.net or visit neatfreak.co.za

Netflorist They deliver flowers and gifts to your home. Contact: 0861 300 600, care@ netflorist.co.za or visit netflorist.co.za Oodles of Doodles Quality hand-drawn or embroidered goodies, which can be personalised to make a special gift for a birthday or baby shower. Order online; goods delivered to your door. Greater Durban. Contact Sally: 074 190 3380 or visit oodlesofdoodles.co.za

novelties CottonOn Kids A range of useful products from bottles and food to maternity wear and toys. Contact: 083 273 7458 or visit cottononkids.co.za Funky Finds and Things Handmade and personalised toys, décor and craft kits. Delivered or posted throughout Durban. Contact Kerry: 076 574 2389 or funkyfindsandthings@gmail.com Mantelli’s Specialises in gift packs with niche biscuits and cookies, which have a significant handmade component, and can be included in a Netflorist hamper. Visit mantellis.com

magazine durban

Simply Flowers Delivers flowers, hampers and gifts for all occasions throughout South Africa. Contact: 0861 256 663, info@simplyflowers.co.za or visit simplyflowers.co.za

pets

dog walkers Paws and Claws A dog walking and pet sitting business. Areas covered include Glenwood, Morningside, Umbilo and Westville. Contact Sarah: 082 362 5368 or sarahcampbell1235@gmail.com Pet Mate A pet care service offering dog walking, pet sitting, pet transportation, doggy daycare, dog behavioural training and more. Durban, particularly Durban North to Umhlanga. Contact: 082 089 8890, petmate.natalie@gmail.com or visit petmate.co.za Pooches on the Run Two experienced, young dog walkers offer 30-minute or onehour walks for your dogs. Plus they offer a pooper scooper service. Berea, Glenwood and Westville. Contact Shaun: 072 399 5821 or Taryn: 079 306 4128

pet grooming services Canine Coiffure They groom dogs of all sizes. Services include clipping and bathing. Collection and delivery in Kloof, Gillits and Winston Park. Contact: 031 764 1558 Distinctive Dogs Offers pet pampering, from bathing to clipping, plus advice on

magazine durban

controlling ticks and fleas. Collection from Durban North to Umhlanga, Monday to Friday. Contact: 031 572 2687Â or 082 300 7770 Pets Parlour A dog and cat grooming parlour with a collection and delivery service.

Hillcrest to Kloof. Contact: 031 765 1727 Petz Parlour They will pick up your dogs for grooming in the Amanzimtoti area.

Contact: 031 903 2404 or 082 943 5695 Shampooch They have an experienced groomer and take dogs of all types. They wash, clip, dip, cut nails and more. Plus every dog leaves with a home-baked liver biscuit. They pick up and deliver from Kloof to Waterfall. Contact: 031 762 1627 The Dog Box Groomers wash, dip and clip dogs, plus they cut nails. Will drop off and deliver from Queensburgh to Umbilo.

Contact Pat or Gerald: 031 464 6052 or 072 791 9530 Umhlanga Dog and Cat Grooming Parlour Cuts for every breed of dog and cat. Pick up and deliver in Durban North, Mount Edgecombe and Umhlanga.

Contact: 031 561 4555 or 072 434 5309 Waggytails Grooming Parlour A member of Companion Animal Professionals; they groom cats and dogs. Collection and delivery in and around Durban. Contact Sue: 083 481 0268 Wags Dog Parlour Cutting and washing service for all breeds of dogs, with collection and delivery. Durban North.

Contact Jane or Tony: 031 563 7116

au pair and nanny agencies Absolute Au Pairs An au pair and nanny placement agency that screens each candidate and does reference checks. They work to fit in with your budget and lifestyle. Contact Jessica: 079 303 1779, info@absoluteaupair.co.za or visit absoluteaupair.co.za Careway Works closely with you to provide the right staff for your home. They offer an au pair and domestic worker placement service and will also supply quality carers for frail or elderly people in the home. Nationwide. Contact Desiree: 011 805 9057, desiree@careway.co.za or visit careway.co.za First Class Domestic and Child Care They offer placement of childminders throughout South Africa. Contact: 011 865 4946, 071 324 9848 or visit firstclassdomestic.co.za The Sitters They are committed to providing well-trained and experienced babysitters. This service allows you to find screened, prepared sitters at an affordable rate, for a special occasion or for something more permanent. Contact: sitterssa@gmail.com or visit sitterssa.weebly.com Trading Places They specialise in placing au pairs in the greater Durban area.

Contact Maria: 031 266 6174, 082 550 0866 or info@trading-places.co.za

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books

a good read for toddlers

View our books blog at

childmag.co.za

for preschoolers

Bizzy Bear – Fun on the Farm

By Benji Davies (Nosy Crow Ltd, R85) This sturdy, colourful board book is perfect for children one to three years old to learn about the farm and its animals. Each page has a tab to pull that reveals a delightful secret. Bizzy Bear makes his way around the farm to meet the three little pigs, cat and mouse, the sheep and cows, mother duck and her ducklings on the pond, the hen house and the stables.

This is also the perfect opportunity to play along and make animal sounds – there are 17 of them you can have fun with. Also look out for Bizzy Bear – Let’s go out and Play in the series.

great read-out loud

Naughty Nina

By Juliet Mickelburgh and AnnaLaura Cantone

(Bloomsbury Publishing, R72) Little Nina is tired of being nice all the time and decides she would like to be naughty instead. Being naughty is excellent fun, but after a while Nina makes a surprising discovery – being naughty all the time can be very boring.

So what will Nina decide to do instead? Beautifully illustrated with lovely detail, lots of humour and wonderful characters, this is a story with resonance for all. Little children will find that naughty antics are funny – up to a point. The book is written in rhyme, which makes for wonderful reading-out-loud story time.

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June 2011

Fancy Nancy – Aspiring Artist

By Jane O’Connor and Robin Preiss Glasser

A Wish this Big

By Ingrid Mennen and Katrin Coetzer

(HarperCollins Publishers, R96) Girls between the ages of four and seven will be thrilled to see Fancy Nancy back.

It’s holiday time and Fancy Nancy is feeling glum because her best friend Bree is out of town. Luckily, Nancy’s mom brings home a brand-new set of glitter markers, Nancy puts her trademark flair to creative use and devotes herself to becoming a serious artist. After all, everything about being an aspiring artist is fancy, especially when inspiration strikes. The book comes with instructions on how your child can create her own artistic masterpiece.

(Tafelberg, R108) Rashied is a little South African boy who wants something big and round. He looks at the sun and the moon, but knows they are too far to catch and too large to keep. He discovers what he wants most is far more down to earth when his simple heartfelt wish becomes intertwined with his own imagination, and the great stories of hope and freedom that Grandpa tells from the time when he was imprisoned on Robben Island. This is a great story of hope and the special bond between a little boy and his grandfather.

magazine durban

for early graders

for teens and preteens

for us Red Wolf

By Liza Marklund

Chester goes to Africa

By Leyland Hazlewood

Mimi

By John Newman

(Xlibris, R145) Chester is a field mouse that lives in the city far away from Africa. But Chester dreams of living in the countryside. Even though all his cousins try to stop him from leaving, he eventually packs up and boards a plane for Africa. It is here that his adventure begins.

Imagine his surprise when the plane touches down in Johannesburg, and he doesn’t see wide-open spaces, meadows, grasslands, lakes and mountains. He goes searching for the real Africa and encounters many fierce animals. Using the drum that he learned to play in the city, Chester befriends these animals and finally finds what he is looking for.

(Walker Books, R85) Mimi is a beautifully written and touching story about a young girl’s life following the sudden and unexpected death of her mother.

Despite Mrs Lemon’s extra sweeties, and sneaky peaks at her sister’s diary, Mimi is struggling. Her dad is always sad, her sister has a horrible secret, and 151 days ago her “mammy” died. What is Mimi to do? Mimi’s tale is a compassionate, immensely moving, and gently humorous story that captures the importance of family, of supporting and understanding one another, and sticking up for yourself when other people don’t understand. Children from seven years and up will enjoy this powerful story.

magazine durban

the nail-biter

(Corgi Books, R108) Reporter Annika Bengtzon is working on the story of a devastating crime when she hears that a journalist investigating the same incident has been killed. It appears to be a hit-and-run accident. Several brutal killings follow – all linked by handwritten letters sent to the victims’ relatives. When Annika unravels a connection with the story she’s writing, she is thrown on to the trail of a deadly psychopath. This edge-of-your-seat suspense thriller will make you want to read Liza Marklund again and again. She knows how to weave unexpected twists and turns into a story.

parenting book Getting To Know You – Simple Games to Play with Your Baby

By Sally Featherstone and Clare Beswick (Featherstone Education, R113) Here is a collection of fun, touchy-feely games to play with your new baby. Experts have shown that baby games help with brain development as well as with more visible skills such as hand-eye coordination and mobility. The book is full of simple, effective and fun games that help your baby’s brain, eyes, hands and feet to develop. Plus, there is extra guidance on how to get the most out of your games and what your baby is learning. Featherstone and Beswick are leading authors, trainers and consultants in early years development and learning.

June 2011

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calendar

what’s on in june

You can also access the calendar online at

childmag.co.za

Here’s your line-up of the best things to do in Durban to beat the winter blues. Compiled by TAMLYN VINCENT

24 fri

special events

28

FUN for children

29

only for parents

31

bump, baby & tot in tow

33

how to help

33

SPECIAL EVENTS

26

FUN FOR CHILDREN

ONLY FOR PARENTS

bump, baby & tot in tow

how to help

Fireside Tales This is a magical storytelling of The Singing Chameleon and The Goat and the Eagle.

Madame Zingara Marvel at the fabulous dinner-cirque spectacular, complete with a four-course feast.

Infant massage workshops Learn to massage your baby through structured positive touch.

Bin-A-Tin campaign Collect tinned foods for disadvantaged moms and grannies this winter.

June 2011

magazine durban

PHOTOGRAPHS: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM

East Coast Radio House and Garden Show See over 300 exhibits while the children are entertained in the play area.

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June 2011

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SPECIAL EVENTS 1 wednesday Madame Zingara The Theatre of Dreams is a fabulous dinner-cirque spectacular. The circus, with new acts, is accompanied by a four-course feast. Ends 15 August. Time: 7pm. Venue: Suncoast Casino. Cost: R365– R450. Contact: 0861 MADAME (623263), boxoffice@madamezingara.com or visit madamezingara.com Art in the Park Wander under the plane trees and view a rich variety of quality art. Ends 5 June. Time: Wednesday– Saturday 10am–8pm, Sunday 9am–4pm.

Venue: Alexandra Park, Pietermaritzburg.

Cost: R10. Contact: 033 345 1348 or visit artinthepark.co.za

3 friday Freedom Banquet Red Light is raising funds for the Human Trafficking Prevention and Awareness programme by hosting a banquet. Performances by Paw Paw productions and the Watoto Children’s Choir. Time: 6pm. Venue: ICC, Durban CBD. Cost: R500. Contact Natalie: 031 562 1961, info@redlight.org.za or visit freedombanquet.co.za

Wildsfees Enjoy a three-course meal, music and an auction. Bring your own chairs, cutlery and drinks, and sit around the fires. Time: 6pm. Venue: Durban North College. Cost: R120.

Contact: 031 564 1347

4 sat

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Winnie the Pooh visits South Africa Huggies brings you an interactive storytelling experience. There are daily performances, so bring along the whole family. Ends 5 June.

Time: 10am, 11:30am, 1pm, 2:30pm, 4pm.

Venue: Galleria, Amanzimtoti. Cost: free entry. Contact: 031 904 2233

4 saturday Glenridge fun day Offers lots of fun activities for children plus a flea market.

Time: 9am–1pm. Venue: Manor Gardens Primary School, Berea. Cost: R10 entry.

Contact: 031 261 7272 Open Air School concert The KwaZuluNatal Philharmonic Orchestra entertains.

Time: 7pm. Venue: Open Air School, 241 Esther Roberts Rd, Glenwood. Cost: R75.

Contact Linda: 031 205 1277 or info@ openairschool.co.za The Birches Preprimary fun day See a drummie display and enjoy great activities, including a treasure hunt for children 3–9 years. Time: 8:30am–1pm. Venue: 1 Oribi Crescent, Pinetown. Cost: free entry. Contact: 031 708 4764

9 June – Reach for a Dream Gameshow

Ladies’ pamper day Spoil yourself to a massage and a cup of tea. Time: 10am–12pm. Venue: Pavilion Hotel, Old Fort Rd, North Beach. Cost: R50. Contact Shaheda: 072 378 6204

9 thursday

14 tuesday

Reach for a Dream Gameshow An audio-visual quiz evening, where teams compete to raise money. Includes a threecourse meal. Time: 7pm. Venue: Suzuki showroom, 1 Wilton Crescent, Umhlanga Ridge. Cost: R200. Contact Anna: 031 566 2220 or prkzn@reachforadream.org.za

When Life gives you Lennons A comical look at the very ordinary Rigby family, told

Old Mutual Music at the Lake With Watershed. Time: 2:30pm. Venue: Durban Botanic Gardens, Berea. Cost: earlybird adults R80, children R20, on concert day adults R100, children R20. Contact: 031 322 4021 or book through ticketbreak.co.za

7 tuesday

10 friday Cowies Hill Preprimary School annual golf day Drinks and snacks provided on the course, plus dinner, prize giving and

sun

11 saturday Art and crafts day Learn about decoupage, card making, massage and make-up techniques. Time: 9am–12pm.

Venue: Asherville Library. Cost: tbc.

Contact: 031 332 9724 or 083 623 1154 Glenwood Preparatory School Founders’ Day Offers a morning of rugby and netball against Chelsea Preparatory School. Time: 7:30am–1:30pm. Venue: Glenwood Preparatory School, Bath Rd, Glenwood. Cost: free entry. Contact: 031 201 5165, enquiries@glenwoodprep.co.za or visit glenwoodprep.co.za Livingstone Primary School fun day and walkathon With loads of fun events for the whole family, from face painting and walk-on-water balls to pony rides, a flea market and food. Time: 9am. Venue: 74 Livingstone Rd, Berea. Cost: free entry.

Contact: 031 312 2026, 082 870 9483 or marketing@livingstoneremedial.co.za

5 sunday

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fun. Time: 9am. Venue: Kloof Country Club. Cost: R1 600 per four-ball. Contact: 031 702 3753 or chpps1@webstorm.co.za

4 June – Open Air School concert

Spar Women’s Challenge Women of all fitness levels can join the 10km or 5km challenge. Entries are at Spar, SuperSpar, KwikSpar or online. Time: 10km 9am, 5km 9:45am. Venue: The People’s Park, Moses Mabhida Stadium, Stamford Hill. Cost: varies. For more info: visit spar.co.za

through the songs of John Lennon and The Beatles. Ends 10 July. Time: Tuesday– Saturday 7pm, Sunday 12:30pm. Venue: The Heritage Theatre, Hillcrest. Cost: R195, Tuesday and Sunday R165. Contact: 031 765 4197 or visit heritagetheatre.co.za

15 wednesday Somebody to Love A dance spectacular to the music of Queen, which includes 18 of their greatest hits, as well as outrageous costumes. Choreographers Debbie Rakusin (African Footprint) and Timothy le Roux explore facets of relationships in a show brimming with atmosphere. Ends 18 June.

Time: 8pm, Saturday 3pm and 8pm. Venue: iZulu Theatre, Sibaya Casino, La Mercy. Cost: R70–R195. Book through Computicket: 083 915 8000 or visit computicket.com

magazine durban

16 thursday Blanket Run The Highway Dragons is collecting old or new blankets of any shape or size to be given to disadvantaged communities this winter.

Time: 10:30am–3pm. End venue: Girl Guides Hall, 14 Lytton Crescent, Pinetown.

Contact Les: 083 487 6846 or madhatter@ highwaydragonsmc.co.za

children under 16 free. Contact: 031 303 5941 or visit housegardenshow.co.za

27 monday

19 June – Father’s Day at Saint James on Venice Luxury Hotel

18 saturday Teeny Tots Playschool fun day There are activities for children. Bring a blanket and an item of tinned food for the collection. Time: 8:30am–1:30pm. Venue: Umhlali Primary School, Salt Rock. Cost: adults R20, children R10. Contact Lyndal: 072 208 6770 or teenytotsplayschool@yahoo.com

19 sunday Saint James on Venice Luxury Hotel Savour a Father’s Day three-course lunch with the family. Time: 12pm. Venue: Venice Rd, Berea. Cost: R120, children under 12 years half price. Contact: 031 312 9488 or visit stjamesonvenice.co.za Yasmina of Cairo An Egyptian-inspired belly dance extravaganza. Time: 7pm.

Venue: iZulu Theatre, Sibaya Casino, La Mercy. Cost: R120. Book through Computicket: 083 915 8000 or visit computicket.com

20 monday John Wesley School (Pinetown) golf day This fundraiser follows a two-ball scramble format. Entry includes dinner.

Time: 10am. Venue: Kloof Country Club.

Cost: R350. Contact Dominique: 084 624 5962 or dlzsmythe@gmail.com

18 June – Teeny Tots Playschool fun day

magazine durban

22 wednesday Divas of Music and Dance Popular music meets creative choreography, with songs by Cher, Celine Dion, Beyoncé, Rihanna and more. Ends 26 June. Time: Wednesday–Saturday 7:30pm, Saturday and Sunday 2:30pm. Venue: Elizabeth Sneddon Theatre, Glenwood. Cost: R125.

Book through Computicket: 083 915 8000 or visit computicket.com

23 thursday Tribute to Michael Jackson Celebrate the music, history and magic of the King of Pop. Ends 17 July. Time: Thursday– Saturday 8pm, Sunday 5pm. Venue: iZulu Theatre, Sibaya Casino, La Mercy. Cost: R70–R195. Book through Computicket: 083 915 8000 or visit computicket.com

24 friday East Coast Radio House and Garden Show See over 300 exhibits under one roof.

There is a garden pavilion, a food market and a homegrown fair. Find anything from designer bathrooms to useful gadgets, or adopt a pet at the SPCA stand. Ends 3 July.

Time: 10am. Venue: Durban Exhibition Centre, Durban CBD. Cost: adults R60,

Fireside Tales This is a magical production of two African fables, The Singing Chameleon and The Goat and the Eagle. Ends 17 July. Time: Monday–Friday 10am. Venue: Amphitheatre, Durban Botanic Gardens, Berea. Cost: adults R30, children over 12 R10. Contact: 073 902 8889

FUN FOR CHILDREN art, culture and science Artspace Features A history of my life in 100 objects by Louise Jennings. 6–25 June. Time: Monday–Friday 9am–5pm, Saturday and public holidays 9am–2pm. Venue: 3 Millar Rd, Stamford Hill. Cost: free. Contact: 031 312 0793 or visit artspace-durban.com Old Mutual MTN Sciencentre Looks at science in a fun and interesting way. Time: Monday–Thursday 9am–7pm, Friday– Saturday 9am–9pm, Sunday 9am–6pm.

Venue: upper level, Gateway. Cost: adults R24, children R25. Contact: 031 566 8040, info@sciencentre.co.za or visit gatewaysciencecentre.co.za The Durban Natural Science Museum Features exhibits about the earth, and an Egyptian mummy. Time: Monday– Saturday 8:30am–5pm, Sunday and public holidays 11am–5pm. Venue: City Hall, Anton Lembede St, Durban CBD. Cost: free. Contact: 031 311 2237

classes, talks and workshops Dharma for Kids Teaches love, compassion and wisdom for children 5–12 years and parents. 5 June. Time: 10am–11am. Venue: Mahasiddha Buddhist Centre, 2 Hollings Rd, Malvern. Cost: R10. Contact: 031 464 0984, info@meditateindurban.org or visit meditateindurban.org Drumkidz Djembe drum sessions get children drumming to stories and songs.

Offers eight lessons per term. For children 3–7 years old. Time: Wednesday 3pm–3:30pm, Saturday 8:30am–9am. Venue: Wednesday Kloof Library Hall, Saturday Glenwood.

Cost: eight lessons R295. Contact Robynne: 083 631 6064, robynne@drumkidz.co.za or visit drumkidz.co.za

Holistic Healing for Kids Focuses on mindnastics, building self-esteem and improving concentration. Time: 2pm, Monday–Saturday. Venue: North Beach, Durban. Cost: R200. Contact Rookaya: 031 332 9724 or rookayavawda@mweb.co.za Learn to Surf Sharon Ngcongo, with the KZN Central Surfriders Association, is starting surf lessons for anyone who wants to learn. Boards can be hired. Time: Saturday and school holidays 9am–3pm.

Venue: uShaka Marine World beachfront.

Cost: tbc. Contact: 083 960 0297 New Daisy Arts Studio Drawing, painting and sculpture classes for all ages. Time: Tuesday 3pm–5pm. Venue: 14 Rapson Rd, Northdene, Queensburgh.

Cost: R250 per month. Contact: 073 540 9210 or daniella.hartman@gmail.com Tots n Pots Children have fun learning to cook. Time: varies. Venues: branches in Ballito, Berea, Durban North and Kloof.

Cost: varies. Contact Ballito: 082 873 2924, Berea: 083 280 2054, Durban North: 073 631 2299 and Kloof: 083 306 1172 or visit totsnpots.com

family outings Books2You Find popular titles by your favourite authors at affordable prices. Time: 2 June 10am–3:30pm, 3 June 7:30am–2pm.

Venue: Winston Park Primary, also at Kloof Senior Primary School and Umhlanga College in June. Cost: free entry. Contact: 082 907 1577, info@books2you.co.za or visit books2you.co.za The Inchanga Choo Choo Travels through the Valley of 1000 Hills to Inchanga. 5 and 26 June. Time: departs

6–25 June – Artspace

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uShaka Kids World

8:30am or 12:30pm. Venue: Stoker’s Arms, Kloof Station. Cost: adults R150, children R120. Contact: 087 808 7715, 082 353 6003 or visit umgenisteamrailway.co.za The Pottery Gallery Watch women creating and painting ceramics, or join in by painting your own mug or bowl.

There is also a coffee shop, plenty of pets, a giant tea pot, play area and more.

Time: 9am–5pm. Venue: on the M4, near Ballito. Cost: price varies depending on item painted. Contact: 032 946 3232 uShaka Kids World Spend the day visiting the giant jungle gym or the Creative Zone.

For children 2–10 years. Tiny tots and parents also catered for. Time: Wednesday– Sunday and holidays 9am–6pm. Venue: uShaka Marine World. Cost: R40, children 12 years and older R5. Contact: 031 328 8000 or visit ushakamarineworld.co.za

Duck and Deck animal farm A chance for children to touch, feel and interact with animals. Closed Mondays. Time: 9:30am–4pm. Venue: 3 Willow Way, Assagay. Cost: R15. Contact: 031 768 1029 or visit duckanddeck.co.za The Animal Farmyard Offers daily milking demonstrations, pony and tractor rides, a playground and foefie slide. Time: 9am–4:30pm daily; milking at 10:30am and 3:30pm. Venue: 3 Lello Rd, Botha’s Hill.

Cost: entry R10, rides R4. Contact: 031 765 2240 or visit animalfarmyard.co.za

holiday activities Cooking Kids Children can cook meals and learn the basics of working with yeast

finding nature and outdoor play 1000 Hills Bird Park Home to rare and exotic birds; now featuring a new 150m zip line. Time: Tuesday–Sunday 8am–4pm.

Venue: 1 Clement Stott Rd, Botha’s Hill.

Cost: adults R25, children R15. Contact: 072 927 8242 or visit 1000hillsbirdpark.co.za Dangerous Creatures Face some of the world’s fastest and most poisonous reptiles such as the black mamba, and tarantulas.

Time: 10am–5pm daily. Venue: uShaka Marine World. Cost: R25. Contact: 031 328 8000 or visit ushakamarineworld.co.za

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June 2011

and baking. 27–28 June 7–11 year olds, 29–30 June 12 year olds and up. Time: 8:30am–11am. Venue: Meryl’s School of Cooking, 1 Wingfield Rd, Kloof. Cost: two sessions R380. Contact Meryl: 031 764 6577, meryl@absamail.co.za or visit merylschoolofcooking.co.za Fine and large motor skills development sessions Craft activities are used to develop fine motor skills; music and large muscle exercise develops coordination and balance. 27 and 30 June, 4, 7, 11, 14 July. Time: fine motor skills 8:30am–9:30am, large motor skills 10am–11am. Venue: Kerry Evetts Occupational Therapy Practice, Rey’s Business Park, Ballito. Cost: R60–R75.

Contact: fine motor skills 079 361 0737 or large motors skills 082 857 6374 July holiday sports clinic A sports programme covering cricket, soccer and rugby for children 6–13 years old.

Book by 20 June. 27 June–1 July. Time: 8:30am–12:30pm. Venue: Glenwood Preparatory School, Bath Rd, Glenwood.

Cost: R350. Contact Steven: 083 357 8574 or stevenkruger@vodamail.co.za Montessori Life Holiday Club Activities, games and crafts, for children 2–12 years.

27 June–15 July. Time: 7:30am–12:30pm or 5pm. Venue: Montessori Life, 7 Little Nook, Sunningdale. Cost: half-day R70, full day R100. Contact Nicky: 072 444 7277 or nicky@topschools.co.za Sugar Bay holiday camps For children 7–17 years. Themes this holiday include “Aero Mania”, “Visit the Poles” and “Brainiac”. 26 June–27 July. Time: 3pm drop off. Venue: Sugar Bay Holiday Resort, Zinkwazi Beach. Cost: varies. Contact: 032 485 3778, bookings@sugarbay.co.za or visit sugarbay.co.za

markets

27 and 30 June – Motor skills development

Essenwood Market Fresh food, children’s activities and a range of stalls.

Time: 9am–2pm, every Saturday. Venue: Essenwood Rd, Berea. Contact: 031 208 1264 or visit essenwoodmarket.com Farmers’ Market Non-refrigerated fresh produce. Time: 10am–1pm. Venue: Jimmy Bellows Sports Field, Westville (Thursday), Autumn Dr, Umhlanga (Wednesday), Amanzimtoti Sports Club (Tuesday). Cost: free entry. Contact Rob: 082 413 1887

Golden Hours Family Market Fundraising initiative of Golden Hours Special School. Time: 10am–3:30pm, every Sunday. Venue: Uitsig Rd, Durban North. Cost: free entry. Contact Lyn: 083 262 3693 i heart market Food and design market showcasing locally produced crafts, food and fresh veggies. 4 June. Time: 9am–2pm.

Venue: DLI Hall, 5 DLI Ave, Greyville. Cost: free entry. Contact: 079 496 4788 or thejoyteam@gmail.com Shongweni Farmers’ and Craft Market Gourmet food, organic and local produce and crafts. Time: 6:30am–10am, every Saturday. Venue: cnr Kassier and Alverstone Rds, Assagay. Cost: free entry.

Contact Christine: 083 777 1674 or info@ shongwenimarket.co.za The food market Locally produced food, children’s corner, mini flower market and tea garden. 25 June. Time: 8am–2pm.

Venue: The Hellenic Community Centre, Durban North. Cost: free entry. Contact: 083 777 5633 or visit thefoodmarket.co.za The Litchi Orchard Farmers’ Market Covered market featuring live music and a children’s playground. 4 and 18 June.

Time: 9am–1pm. Venue: Seaforth Ave, Foxhill. Cost: free entry. Contact: 084 205 6151 or jeremy@litchiorchard.co.za The Riverside Market Offers high-quality products. Proceeds go to local charities.

5 June. Time: 10am–3pm. Venue: northern entrance of Scottburgh, at the Scottburgh River Mouth. Cost: free entry. Contact Sue or Tony: 039 975 3893

on stage and screen Disney Junior channel launch DStv is launching a brand-new channel aimed at children 2–5 years old. It is an extension and renaming of Playhouse Disney specifically aimed at this age group. 1 June. For more info: visit disney.co.za/disney-junior/ Fireside Tales A magical production of two African fables, The Singing Chameleon and The Goat and the Eagle. 27 June–17 July. Time: Monday–Friday 10am. Venue: Amphitheatre, Durban Botanic Gardens, Berea. Cost: adults R30, children over 12 R10. Contact: 073 902 8889 Girls Wanna Rock The cast takes you through seven decades of music, starting from the 1940s right into the 2000s.

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31 May–10 July. Time: varies. Venue: The Barnyard Theatre, Gateway. Cost: Wednesday–Saturday R125, Tuesday night and matinee R90. Contact: 031 566 3045, gateway@barnyardtheatres.co.za or visit barnyardtheatres.co.za Old Mutual Music at the Lake This event features Watershed. 5 June. Time: 2:30pm. Venue: Durban Botanic Gardens, Berea. Cost: earlybird adults R80, children R20, on concert day adults R100, children R20. Contact: 031 322 4021 or book through ticketbreak.co.za Somebody to Love A dance spectacular to the music of 18 of Queen’s greatest hits.

15–18 June. Time: 8pm, Saturday 3pm and 8pm. Venue: iZulu Theatre, Sibaya Casino, La Mercy. Cost: R70–R195. Book through Computicket: 083 915 8000 or visit computicket.com Sundowner Acoustic Sessions Sandy Bigara and friends entertain. Families are invited to an evening under the stars, with great music and food. Time: 6pm–9pm, every Friday. Venue: Blue Zoo, Mitchell Park, Morningside. Cost: free entry. Contact Sandy: 082 865 0226 When Life gives you Lennons A comical look at the Rigby family, told through the songs of John Lennon and The Beatles. 14 June–10 July. Time: Tuesday–Saturday 7pm, Sunday 12:30pm. Venue: The Heritage Theatre, Hillcrest. Cost: R195, Tuesday and Sunday R165. Contact: 031 765 4197 or visit heritagetheatre.co.za

playtime and story time Books and Books children’s story time Time: 10am, every Saturday. Venue: Shop 42, Kensington Square, 53 Kensington Dr, Durban North. Cost: free. Contact: 031 563 6288 or booksandbooks@telkomsa.net Children’s story time A story followed by a craft or activity. For ages 3–8 years. Time: 10am, every Saturday. Venue: 26 Rockview Rd, Amanzimtoti. Cost: free. Contact: 031 903 6692 or thebookboutique@gmail.com Clamber Club Jungle gym, hoops, sand pit and more. Time: 12pm–4:30pm, every Friday. Venue: Hellenic Community Centre, High Grove Rd, Durban North. Cost: R20.

Contact Michaela: 074 101 2616 Steam train rides Ride a miniature steam engine at the Durban Society of Model Engineers. 12 and 26 June.

magazine durban

bikers can join in this series. Various age categories available. 25 June. Time: 1pm.

Venue: Mountain Splendour, Drakensberg.

Cost: R30 entry fee. Contact André: 082 336 7149 or andre@hps.co.za The Wavehouse Features a variety of attractions from the flowrider, to the skate park and rock climbing wall. Time: 10am–4pm. Venue: Gateway Theatre of Shopping, Umhlanga. Cost: varies.

Contact: 031 584 9400, info@wavehouse. co.za or visit wavehouse.co.za

only for parents classes, talks and workshops

17–23 June – Tribute to Michael Jackson

Playground and tea/coffee is available.

Time: 11am–4pm. Venue: 4 Hinton Grove, Virginia. Cost: R5 per ride. Contact: 083 284 6469

sport and physical activities Durban Ice Rink Open seven days a week, with five skate sessions daily. Don’t forget to take socks. Time: varies. Venue: 81 Somtseu Rd, Durban CBD. Cost: R40 (includes skate hire). Contact: 031 332 4597 or visit durbanicerink.co.za Mongoose Primary School’s mountain bike series All-level school mountain

Adventure Boot Camp

Adventure Boot Camp Camps run for one hour a day either in the morning or evening, or both. Time: varies. Venue: various venues in Durban. Cost: varies.

Contact: 021 447 2746, 082 567 2267 or visit adventurebootcamp.co.za Bruce’s Boot Camp Bruce and his trainers show you how to get fit and stay fit. 12 sessions, four weeks. Starts 27 June. Time: varies. Venue: Morningside, Durban North or Glenwood. Cost: R650, trial session R70.

Contact: simine@theperfectfit.co.za or visit theperfectfit.co.za Designing my world through positive thinking Learn how to use your mind to develop ways of thinking that give you confidence and happiness. 16 years and older. 26 June. Time: 9:30am–12:45pm.

Venue: Mahasiddha Buddhist Centre, 2 Hollings Rd, Malvern. Cost: R130. Contact: 031 464 0984 or info@meditateindurban.org

Meryl’s School of Cooking Learn how to make vegetarian meals, plus great dinner party ideas and a course for domestic workers. Time: varies. Venue: 1 Wingfield Rd, Kloof. Cost: morning course R650, evening course R330, domestic course R850. Contact Meryl: 031 764 6577, meryl@absamail.co.za or visit merylschoolofcooking.co.za Sugar Me 3D novelty cake workshops Learn how to decorate with icing sugar art. For anyone 12 years and older. Time: Tuesday 9am–1pm. Venue: Morningside.

Cost: R525. Contact: 076 302 3396 or sugarme@rdesigns.co.za The Pottery Gallery Get some friends together, grab a bottle of wine and get creative by painting your own piece of pottery. Time: Monday–Saturday 9am–5pm. Venue: on the M4, near Ballito.

Cost: price varies depending on item painted. Contact: 032 946 3232 Yoga on the Beach Classes held every Thursday for adults and teens, from beginners to advanced. Time: 5pm–6pm, every Thursday. Venue: Suncoast Zone.

Cost: free. Contact: 031 201 8585

on stage and screen Divas of Music and Dance Popular music meets creative choreography. 22–26 June.

Time: Wednesday–Saturday 7:30pm, Saturday and Sunday 2:30pm. Venue: Elizabeth Sneddon Theatre, Glenwood.

Cost: R125. Book through Computicket: 083 915 8000 or visit computicket.com Kevin Perkins is Michael Naicker Back by popular demand, with his unique brand of comedy. Not suitable for children.

7–12 June. Time: Tuesday–Saturday 7pm, Sunday 12:30pm. Venue: The Heritage Theatre, Hillcrest. Cost: R220. Contact: 031 765 4197 or visit heritagetheatre.co.za Madame Zingara A dinner-cirque spectacular. 1 June. Time: 7pm. Venue: Suncoast Casino, Durban Beach. Cost: R365–R450. Contact: 0861 MADAME (623263), boxoffice@madamezingara.com or visit madamezingara.com The Strat Pack Celebrates the Fender Stratocaster. 1–5 June. Time: Tuesday– Saturday 7pm, Sunday 12:30pm. Venue: The Heritage Theatre, Hillcrest. Cost: R195, Tuesday and Sunday R165. Contact: 031 765 4197 or visit heritagetheatre.co.za

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family marketplace

Me and My Pet photo competition

Tribute to Michael Jackson 23 June– 17 July. Time: Thursday–Saturday 8pm, Sunday 5pm. Venue: iZulu Theatre, Sibaya Casino, La Mercy. Cost: R70–R195. Book through Computicket: 083 915 8000 or visit computicket.com Yasmina of Cairo An Egyptian-inspired belly dance extravaganza. Time: 7pm.

Venue: iZulu Theatre, Sibaya Casino, La Mercy. Cost: R120. Book through Computicket: 083 915 8000 or visit computicket.com

support groups Al Anon and Alateen Support groups for those affected by drinking. Alateen is for younger relatives or friends of alcoholics.

For more info or to find your nearest branch contact: 031 304 1826 or visit alanon.org.za CANSA Support Durban North For survivors, relatives and friends. 7 June.

Venue: Durban North Methodist Church Hall. Contact: 031 564 2510 (for CANSA support groups in other areas call 031 205 9525) Childhood cancer parent support group CHOC schedules regular support meetings. Contact Gill: 084 831 3683 or visit choc.org.za Childline Works to protect children, offer counselling to abuse victims, educate and train. Call the toll-free line at any time on 0800 055 555 or visit childlinesa.org.za Compassionate Friends Support group for family and friends who have lost a loved

one. 26 June. Venue: ABSA premises, 20 Hunter St, Durban CBD. Time: 3pm–5pm. Contact: 031 335 0463 or 082 458 3663 Depression and Anxiety South Africa For those suffering from depression, trauma, bipolar disorder, and other mood and anxiety disorders. Call the national helpline on 0800 205 121 for referral to the relevant support group Diabetes South Africa Contact: 0861 222 717 or durban@diabetessa.co.

Down Syndrome Association KZN Intuthuko Support Group meeting for those with Down’s syndrome and their families. 18 June. Venue: Anglican Church Hall, Umbilo Rd. Contact: 076 978 9811 or the office: 031 464 2055 Durban Autism Support An informal and volunteer-based Asperger’s support service. Contact Di: 083 443 8385 or dimaitland@tiscali.co.za Famsa Offers family and relationship counselling, parenting guidance, conflict resolution and more. Contact: 031 202 8987 or visit 30 Bulwer Rd, Glenwood Hi Hopes Offers support and information to families of babies with hearing loss.

Contact Cheryl: 082 447 1142, cheryl. devnath@gmail.com or visit wits.ac.za/ Humanities/Education/Deaf+Studies/ HIHOPES Hoping is Coping Nationwide support groups for those newly diagnosed with cancer and their families. Contact: 011 646 5628, lgold@icon.co.za or visit cansa.org.za Reach for Recovery Breast Cancer Support Group Get together for bringand-share morning teas. Contact: 03l 205 9525 or 072 248 0008 SADAG South African Depression and Anxiety Group offers assistance to those suffering from depression or drug abuse or who may be suicidal. For more information or referral to a support group visit sadag.co.za Speak Easy For those who stutter, their family and friends. Share experiences and tips. Contact Imraan: 082 786 3718 or visit speakeasy.org.za The KZN Cerebral Palsy Association Diary of a Cerebral Palsied Child is an attempt to help other parents, family or friends of those with cerebral palsy. Visit: kzncerebralpalsy.co.za/diary.php

Toptots

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it’s party time

We Help You Cope cancer support group Covers a range of topics from nutrition to spiritual needs. Time: 5:30pm–7pm, every Thursday. Venue: The Boardroom, Netcare Parklands Hospital, 75 Hopelands Rd, Overport. Contact Bernice: 031 242 4129 or bernice. prevostdelangristin@netcare.co.za

For more help planning your child’s party visit

childmag.co.za/resources/birthday-parties

For more support groups visit childmag.co.za/resources/supportgroups

bump, baby & Tot in tow

classes, talks and workshops Hypnobirthing Regular classes help you prepare mentally, physically and emotionally for a better birth. Time: varies. Venue: Mt Edgecombe. Cost: R1 300 per couple, includes course materials. Contact Patti: 079 220 2639 or durbanhypnobirthing.co.za Infant massage workshops Learn to massage your baby. Time: Wednesday 10:30am–12pm. Venue: Lasting Impressions, 35 Caefron Ave, Westville. Cost: four sessions R550. Contact Alison: 031 267 0435, 083 661 6682 or lasting.impressions. studio@gmail.com Pregnancy and newborn baby seminar Pregnant moms learn about birth options, foetal development, massage and exercise.

Moms with newborn babies find out about the challenges and expectations of the first six weeks. 25 June. Time: pregnancy 8am–12pm, newborns 2pm–5pm. Venue: Lasting Impressions, 35 Caefron Ave, Westville. Cost: R100, couples R150. Contact Alison: 031 267 0435, 083 661 6682 or lasting.impressions.studio@gmail.com Pregnancy Body Stretch Exercise classes for moms and babies. Time: Monday and Wednesday 1pm. Venue: Lasting Impressions, 35 Caefron Ave, Westville.

Cost: one lesson R60, eight lessons R320.

Contact Alison: 031 267 0435 or lasting. impressions.studio@gmail.com

playtime and story time Moms and Tots and Moms and Babes workshops Children learn through play and socialisation, while building the relationship with their mother. Time: varies. Venues: Umhlanga, Durban North, the Highway area and Glenwood. Cost: varies. Contact: info@ momsandtots.co.za or visit momsandbabes. co.za or momsandtots.co.za Muslimahs and Tots workshops Interactive programmes designed to build relationships through play; geared specifically towards Muslim parents. Time: varies. Venues: North Beach, Overport and Umhlanga. Cost: varies. Contact: muslimahsandtots.co.za Toptots Children 8 weeks–4 years can join an age-appropriate class to learn and play.

Pregnancy and newborn baby seminar

Time: varies. Venues: Durban North, Ballito, Kloof, Hillcrest, Westville and Hilton. Cost: about R810 per term. Contact: 031 266 4910, 082 876 7791, info@toptots.co.za or visit toptots.co.za

support groups La Leche Worldwide breast-feeding support organisation. For breast-feeding support and questions contact Jane: 031 309 1801 or visit llli.org/southafrica Moms and Babes support group Meets monthly for a talk. 14 June. Time: 9am–10:30am. Venue: Alberlito Hospital, Ballito. Cost: free. Contact: 032 946 6956 or 032 946 1826 Postnatal Depression Support Association of South Africa Call the national helpline on 082 882 0072 or visit pndsa.co.za The South African Multiple Birth Association For families with multiples.

Contact: 082 338 2625. For counselling kzn@samultiplebirth.co.za or to register online, visit samultiplebirth.co.za For more support groups visit childmag.co.za/resources/supportgroups

how to help Bin-A-Tin campaign The Robin Hood Foundation is collecting tinned foods and non-perishable food items to be given to moms and grannies in need. Collect tins for the bins at Pick n Pay. Your school, church or company can also adopt a bin of their own. Contact Cindy or Patricia: 031 265 2000 or cindy@proappoint.co.za KwaZulu-Natal Society for the Blind Needs volunteers to sell raffle tickets. To offer your time contact Bobby: 031 202 7277 Me and My Pet photo competition Enter online by loading a picture of you and your pet and win great prizes. The competition is open to children in qualifying preprimary and primary schools. Closes 17 June. You can also donate to the SPCA. For more info: visit spcadbn.org.za

don’t miss out!

For a free listing, email your event to durban@childmag.co.za or fax it to 031 207 3429. Information must be received by 27 May for the July issue, and must include all relevant details. No guarantee can be given that it will be published. To post an event online, visit childmag.co.za

magazine durban

June 2011

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last laugh

road-tripping

across the RSA

Joe, Sam and Benj

i

remember the first time Andreas and I did a car trip as parents. We packed up six-month-old Joey in his bulky, multi-click car seat and then chucked all his essentials in after him... into our little Volksie. Pram, camping cot, play donut, portable fan, his giant Pooh Bear; if our little snookums needed it, it was crammed in the back of that car.

All was great. Right until we started driving, and Joey started crying.

“Um, Dreas?” I said. “I can’t reach the baby to comfort him. He’s kinda wedged behind the pram. In fact, now that I think about it – that’s probably why he is crying.”

“Can’t talk. Driving,” said Dreas, through gritted teeth. “Need to get to Pretoria in 14 hours. You’re not going to need pee stops and stuff, are you?”

As you’ve probably intimated, that first trip didn’t go very well.

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June 2011

Eleven years later, with parents still 14 hours away and a budget that doesn’t leave much for aeroplane money, we’ve got a lot better at road-tripping.

We have pretty much the same rituals as most SA families, in that we leave before the crack of dawn, take our favourite pillows, pack egg mayonnaise sandwiches, and argue about who is going to sit with that last bag squished under their legs.

We also make most of the same mistakes. We let the boys pack their own “trip bags”, which inevitably results in everyone squirming around for at least an hour looking for a dropped Bakugan or some other tiny, but emotionally-priceless piece of plastic. Against our better judgement, we let children eat greasy pit-stop burgers at 10am, and then blame each other if anyone throws up.

But luckily, as we’ve got older and less flexible, the children have become much easier to manage. To the point where, well, I think I am now the car’s Weakest Link.

It’s not my fault; I’ve just always needed to pee a lot. And I get very antsy sitting in a car for hours. And bored. And...

“Mom!” yelled Joey exasperated, about five hours into our last trip. “You know we aren’t nearly there yet! The sat nav says four more hours; you should know this better than anyone, you are sitting right in front of it!”

“Joe has a point, Mom,” said Benj sternly. “Your constant whining is breaking my concentration. It’s hard enough reading Asterix in the car without you moaning and huffing all the time. Why don’t you play on your iPhone or something?”

“Or look outside,” said Andreas. “See that cool ridge over there? That’s a dolerite

sill! Isn’t that interesting? That’s been there since the split of age-old continents...”

Yup. I am officially the most childish person in my family. Which I’m okay with, because it means I have also invented the coolest road trip game ever... “car dancing”.

It’s frigging awesome. You play your most boppy ’80s compilation, and then headbang your way through the Karoo. Sure you get a few stares from passing motorists (especially at stop-n-gos) but by the time you’ve got your hair out of your eyes, you’ve covered like a hundred kilometres.

And the best news? My boys let me do it for an hour every trip; two if I’ve been good.

Sam Wilson is the Editor-in-Chief of Women24, Food24 and Parent24. She’s also a little upset about the number of travel draughts dropped down the side of her seat that she can’t wiggle back up.

magazine durban

PHOTOGRAPH: Andreas SpÄth

SAM WILSON survives family trips – and her children’s irritation – by playing cool car games.