Child magazine | DBN August 2015 by Hunter House Publishing

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August 2015

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unusual school outings study methods that really work whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s wrong with bunking school?

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Every morning I wake up excited to go to school. I love school! So read the last sentence of my daughter Robyn’s high school application essay. Sitting in front of the prospective headmaster as he read the sentence, I knew it was a winner – for her, for him, but especially for her dad and me. Her enthusiasm makes me think that we really did choose the right primary school for her. Our next challenge is to get it right for high school. We want our children to be healthy and happy. We want them to make friends, have a good sense of humour and find a sport or hobby that fires them up. We also want them to get a great education, and choosing the right school can deliver all of the above and more. Our children’s future is determined by our choices. Feel the pressure, much? Different schools have different things to offer the children they enrol, but what interests me is what Robyn has to offer her prospective school. I believe that through her contribution to the school, her teachers and classmates, the clubs she may join and any community involvement she may have, she will feel connected. Connection engenders a sense of belonging. And belonging leads to real happiness and, ultimately, success. With so much at stake, it’s no wonder we find choosing the right school for our children a minefield. So I hope that Child magazine inspires and guides us all to make the best decision. Enjoy our annual education issue.

Lisa Mc Namara Publisher

Hunter House P U B L I S H I N G

Publisher Lisa Mc Namara • lisa@childmag.co.za

Editorial Managing Editor Marina Zietsman • marina@childmag.co.za Features Editor Marc de Chazal • features@childmag.co.za Resource Editor Tamlyn Vincent • durban@childmag.co.za Editorial Assistant Lucille Kemp • capetown@childmag.co.za Copy Editor Debbie Hathway

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childmag.co.za Online Content Manager Marc de Chazal • online@childmag.co.za

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Durban’s Child magazineTM is published monthly by Hunter House Publishing, PO Box 12002, Mill Street, 8010. Office address: Unit 7, Canterbury Studios, 35 Wesley Street, Gardens, Cape Town. Tel: 021 465 6093, fax: 021 462 2680, email: info@childmag.co.za. Annual subscriptions (for 11 issues) cost R165, including VAT and postage inside SA. Printed by Paarl Web. Copyright subsists in all work published in Durban’s Child magazineTM. We welcome submissions but retain the unrestricted right to change any received copy. We are under no obligation to return unsolicited copy. The magazine, or part thereof, may not be reproduced or adapted without the prior written permission of the publisher. We take care to ensure our articles, and other editorial content, are accurate and balanced, but cannot accept responsibility for loss, damage or inconvenience that may arise from reading them.

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August 2015

contents

august 2015

8 regulars

3 a note from lisa 5 over to you readers respond

features 12 bunking school truancy is a serious matter. Glynis Horning explains why it should be dealt with early

14 the myth of work-life balance Samantha Page says parents should not feel guilty when juggling work and family life

16 amsterdam – a celebration of history, art and light Lisa Mc Namara discovers that you can explore this Dutch city in 48 hours

18 learning curves Tamlyn Vincent looks at study methods that work, and those that don’t

20 what’s in a word? children do swear, sometimes. Gary Koen gives expert advice on how to deal with it

27 tastes like freedom try these mouthwatering LCHF recipes from Karen Thomson and Kerry Hammerton’s new book Sugar Free

6 pregnancy news – when you can’t breast-feed Anél Lewis gets expert advice on what to do

7 best for baby – soothing your crying baby Catherine Goldfain looks at reasons why babies cry and what you can do to calm them

10 dealing with difference – motor neuron disease can MND and sports injuries be linked? Marina Zietsman finds the answer

22 resource – unusual school outings Tamlyn Vincent compiles a list of unique places for your next class trip

23 what’s on in august 26 finishing touch getting the family out of the front door in the mornings is Anél Lewis’ nemesis

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health 8 vaccinated or vulnerable Lucille Kemp points out why vaccinations are so important

25 let’s party 26 family marketplace

this month’s cover images are supplied by:

August 2015

Joburg

Cape Town

Durban

Pretoria

St Mary’s School Waverley grahamdelacy.com

St John’s College stjohnscollege.co.za

Kingsmead College kingsmead.co.za

St Mary’s School Waverley grahamdelacy.com

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letters

over to you

Let us know what’s on your mind. Send your letters or comments to marina@childmag.co.za or PO Box 12002, Mill Street, 8010.

thank you

your voice online

While it’s true that the tide of animal abuse and neglect can seem overwhelming, it’s also true that the SPCA – with your support – is making a huge difference. The success of our book sale demonstrates that nothing less than “a total effort” would be acceptable for animals and I want to assure you that with your continued support, this will never change. Thanks again for being a valued partner in our loving service to all animals. We want to appeal to people to continue donating books for this worthy cause. Natasha Johannes, Fundraising Officer, Cape of Good Hope SPCA

comment on “father’s day without dad” What a wonderful article: sensitive and thought-provoking, and very important and timeous – it is much appreciated. Sus

Thanks for the article that was featured on childhood apraxia of speech in the July issue (“when words get stuck”). I think it was very well written and informative. My little boy has apraxia and Deidre’s story was almost identical to ours. I read the magazine consistently and love your articles. Thanks for keeping it real. Alexa

comment on “understanding tourette’s syndrome” My daughter is now 13 years old. She was diagnosed at the age of 11. This last year has been very difficult for her, as the Tourette’s has become uncontrollable. We have tried many different medications, but unfortunately she had terrible side effects to most of them. Eventually we found medication that worked. It was amazing to

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comment on “leaving facebook” I am a counsellor in private practice and it echoes my clients’ feelings. The huge problem with comparing to others: it takes away from your own soul, your own purpose and feelings of fulfilment. A well written article. Anonymous

see how she got her life back. She started socialising with friends again. When the Tourette’s was at its worst she became very angry, depressed and withdrawn. She has gained a lot of weight due to the medication and her self-esteem is very low. I am very concerned as she says the symptoms are coming back. We are on the maximum dose for the medication. We will have to start all over again. Anonymous comment on twitter I love your article “flying solo” (July 2015). It’s not easy, but I must say I have a great support system. Nomvula Prusent subscribe to our newsletter and win Our wins have moved online. Please subscribe to our newsletter and enter our weekly competitions. To subscribe, visit childmag.co.za

We reserve the right to edit and shorten submitted letters. The opinions reflected here are those of our readers and are not necessarily held by Hunter House Publishing.

recommended reading

skin-to-skin Once your baby is born, it’s important to put him on your chest immediately after delivery and to keep him close for as long as possible. Jolly says that if a baby is close to the mother, she will see when he is ready to feed.

latch effectively Jolly says you will know when your baby is latched properly as he will swallow milk audibly and visibly. You will also be comfortable. Breast-feeding should not hurt, she says.

of babies in SA are exclusively breast-fed for six months

• • • •

llli.org normalfed.com kellymom.com The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding by La Leche League International

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best for baby

soothing

your crying baby Babies often cry – a lot. Figuring out the cause isn’t always easy, but there are things you can do to comfort your child, says CATHERINE GOLDFAIN.

oothing a bawling baby is heart-wrenching for any mom. Sometimes just identifying the cause can prove tricky. Joburg-based nurse, Sr Shay, says babies pick up on a mom’s anxiety, so in your quest to mollify your mournful munchkin, a calm approach is key.

PHOTOGRAPH: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM

why do babies cry? All babies “fuss” at first due to immature neurological systems. Most newborns cry for about three hours a day, peaking at around six weeks, and then taper off to about an hour a day after three months.

which cry means what? For Sabrina, a mother from Durban, it was quite easy: “A tired cry was whinier than other cries, whereas a cry of pain was more of a sharp, desperate cry. And then a hungry cry was more demanding.” But, since each child is different, most mothers resort to a process of elimination.

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crying cures Hunger Weigh your baby regularly when breast-feeding – and check your milk supply. Also avoid using feeding as a cure-all. “Often moms will hear their baby crying and the first instinct is to feed them,” says Shay, “but this will make them cry even more if something else is bothering them.” ENT pain Ear, nose and throat issues are often the culprit. If they’re stop-start feeding, it’s often because they have a sore throat. Tummy troubles A colicky baby will draw their legs up to their stomach and cry. Probiotics and massage can help. A typical reflux baby, on the other hand, arches their back and the more you feed them, the worse their reflux becomes, says Shay. Joburg mom, Susan, has been down this road with her child. “Octavia was quite colicky and had bad reflux. We did do baby massage and that definitely helped. And I used gripe water. If you held her often, that’s usually what she wanted. We also used a lot of probiotics.” Another reason babies may cry a lot is food allergies, which are easily apparent and require medical

support. Lactose-intolerant babies, for instance, will have explosive, foamy stools and will scream incessantly. Overstimulation “Sleep begets sleep,” says Joburg paediatrician Dr Lucic. Keeping your baby up and about for too long can lead to meltdowns. Putting them in a dark, quiet room with some white noise can work wonders. Comfort Sometimes your baby just needs a nappy change, or to lose a layer of clothing – or even some oldfashioned rocking or cuddling. When it’s serious... “A hungry cry will sound like ‘neh, neh’, but if they have a high-pitched cry, bordering on a scream, especially with a fever, you need to see a doctor,” says Shay. This could signal something serious, like meningitis. Excessive crying should never be ignored. So, if you’ve done what you can in terms of feeding, burping, rocking, swaddling and massage but nothing helps, go to your paediatrician and get your baby’s ears, nose and throat checked. Provided there’s no fever and they’re feeding and gaining weight, you can leave it for 10 days to two weeks before consulting your doctor.

August 2015

health

vaccinated or vulnerable Clinical virologist Prof Diana Hardie and pharmacist Lee Baker clarify why it is important to ensure that your child receives their

vaccinations. By LUCILLE KEMP

s a result of very high rates of childhood measles vaccination, the US succeeded in eliminating measles, the most infectious disease we know, in the year 2000. However, since then, the Centre for Disease Control has reported a rising number of measles cases in the US and when an infected individual visited a Disney theme park in California in December 2014, 111 Americans contracted measles, the vast majority of whom had not received the measles vaccine. In July 2015, the US confirmed its first measles death in over a decade.

the forces at play Parents around the world have been afraid that vaccines can harm their children, a fear largely stemming from a study that linked autism to the measles, mumps and rubella (MMR) vaccination, which was officially found to be falsified. Before Cape Town mom Shannon Matheson’s son, Jude, was born she had decided that she wanted to avoid vaccinating due to this particular perceived risk, “but after talking to many friends and looking at my environment I decided that it is necessary.” Prof Diana Hardie points out that in South Africa we are all the more vulnerable to infectious disease and therefore cannot allow this study to continue to inform our decisionmaking about vaccinating our children. “The ongoing spread of measles occurring in many African countries to the north presents a significant risk of an imported case triggering an epidemic in South Africa. In 2009 and 2010 there was a countrywide measles epidemic, which resulted in many deaths from measles in infected children.” Lee Baker adds that KwaZulu-Natal is currently dealing with an outbreak of diphtheria, “all in children who have not had their diphtheria boosters.” In world news, an unvaccinated boy, with the first case of diptheria in Spain for 28 years, died in June 2015.

vaccines are a victim of their own success The bottom line is simple: vaccines prevent people from getting diseases that are potentially life-threatening and to date have saved millions of lives and prevented much pain and suffering. “Because of vaccination, killer diseases such as smallpox, polio, diphtheria, pertussis and tetanus are rarely, if ever, seen these days. If vaccination coverage falls too low, they will very likely return,” states Hardie. One of the main motivations for vaccinating one’s child, Hardie continues, is fear of the disease it prevents and due to current rarity, public fear of diseases such as measles has diminished. “In the 1950s when the first polio vaccines were introduced, parents queued for hours outside clinics to have their children vaccinated because at that time, almost everyone had known someone who had at random been struck down and maimed by poliomyelitis.”

Very high vaccine coverage is required to prevent outbreaks. Some infections are more easily transmitted than others, so the more infectious a disease, the higher the level of herd immunity needed to prevent circulation in the community. For example, more than 90% of children need to be vaccinated to prevent the circulation of measles in the community. Hardie says that the Department of Health is struggling to maintain the target levels of infant measles vaccination required to prevent measles outbreaks. “Estimates of the immunisation coverage of children in South Africa published by WHO and UNICEF in 2013, showed that vaccine coverage was highest at 84% for BCG (the TB vaccine given at birth) and lowest for measles at 66% for one dose and 53% for the recommended two doses.”

August 2015

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PHOTOGRAPH: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM

the power and limitation of herd immunity

feature

Because of vaccination, killer diseases such as smallpox, polio, diphtheria, pertussis and tetanus are rarely, if ever, seen these days. If vaccination coverage falls too low, they will very likely return. Hardie, however, urges parents to not rely on herd immunity, making it each individual household’s responsibility to ensure that their child is vaccinated. Due to a mounting number of parents choosing not to vaccinate their children, Baker says health authorities in the US are trying to make it more difficult for parents to opt out. “There are some US schools that are asking unvaccinated children to stay away from school in case they contract measles and infect children who can’t have the vaccine, such as children with leukaemia.”

why wouldn’t you vaccinate? Vaccines trigger a natural protective response in the body to disease-causing organisms. Granted, they can cause some physical side effects, but these don’t compare to the effects of not vaccinating your child. “Vaccination’s side effects are mostly mild and predictable and can be easily managed, and include fever, pain and swelling at the injection site,” says Hardie. “Even though Jude got the Rota virus despite being vaccinated [possible, according to doctors, but the virus is far milder if the child is vaccinated] and he had a bad reaction to Pentaxim, [his arm swelled and he had a high fever for two days], I’m glad I decided to vaccinate him – I have greater peace of mind and it’s also a prerequisite for admission into most preschools,” says Shannon. Since the measles epidemic in South Africa in 2009/10, Hardie reports that a growing number of children who had measles during the epidemic have been diagnosed with the devastating neurological disease sub-acute sclerosing panencephalitis (SSPE), which is a fatal measles virus infection that enters the brain during acute measles infection and multiplies unchecked. The disease presents six to eight years after the measles virus infection and lasts about one to two years. “Affected children develop progressive behavioural problems, intellectual deterioration, uncontrollable seizures and eventually lapse into a coma and die,” says Hardie. Most parents today had their vaccines as children, says Baker, so why do they want to deprive their children of the protection they have had?

frequently asked questions Paediatrician and allergologist, Dr Claudia Gray, answers some of your questions around vaccinations. “My baby didn’t get the BCG. Should I be worried?” The BCG protects against severe TB infection, which is extremely common in South Africa and a potentially serious infectious disease. Therefore the BCG vaccine is strongly advised here as soon after birth as possible, and if not then, before the child turns one year old. If a child did not receive the BCG in the first year of life, please discuss with your healthcare practitioner whether the vaccine may still be suitable to give at a later stage. “My child has missed her six-year-old vaccination and she is now seven. Can I still take her?” Yes, you can. Vaccinations are generally safe across the age groups and postponing vaccines is generally not an issue. However, certain vaccines only carry a license for certain age groups, mainly because they were only studied in that age group or because the immune system responds in different ways at different ages, leading to different recommended vaccines at the various ages. Once again, ask your clinic sister or doctor if the vaccine is still fine to give at your child’s age. If not, there will certainly be a similar alternative providing the relevant vaccine cover. “I’ve lost my son’s immunisation card and he’s due for his six-year booster. I have to register him for Grade 1 next year and I’m worried that they won’t take him as a result. Can the school refuse my child entry? How do I go about getting a new immunisation card?” Schools are particular about having a record of vaccinations to ensure the safety of the “herd” from preventable diseases. This should be respected. If you have lost your vaccine card, ask the nursing sister or doctor where your vaccinations were originally done, if they still have a record. Most have a backup record of the child’s notes or on their systems. In this way they can recreate your vaccine record card.

where to find help For vaccination queries, the Amayeza Information Centre: 0860 160 160 For more articles on immunisations: childmag.co.za

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August 2015

dealing with difference

motor neuron disease People struck down by MND waste away before our eyes. MARINA ZIETSMAN looks at this condition and its alleged

t just 13 years old, Emma Goodman was diagnosed as the youngest sufferer of motor neuron disease (MND) in Britain, and the youngest to die of this debilitating disease in the UK. She passed away quietly in her sleep when she was 17 years old. Her family knew her time with them was short, and they were also fully aware that the condition had already claimed the lives of seven members of Emma’s immediate family, including her dad.

genes and mutations According to the Australian MND Association, only about 10% of MND cases are “familial”, meaning more than one person in the family suffers from it. Thus, 90% of cases are referred to as sporadic MND, and the cause is unknown. The role of genetics in MND is intricate, but researchers have found that people with familial MND have the disorder because of a mutation in a gene, which causes the gene to function abnormally. This genetic mutation can be passed on through generations. In some cases, if a parent has a genetic mutation, their child has a 50/50 chance of inheriting MND. People who inherit an MNDrelated genetic mutation have a high but uncertain chance of developing MND, and not all people with this gene will inherit the disease.

There is absolutely no proof that trauma injuries on the sports field can be linked to MND. Can this mutation be detected early and treated? Dr Franclo Henning, a neurologist in Cape Town and the chairman of the Motor Neuron Disease Association of South Africa (MNDASA), says it can be picked up by testing for the mutation that the parent has, but nothing can be done about it, even if detected before it shows signs. “Even in familial cases of MND, the disease mostly manifests in adulthood,” says Henning. “The reason for this is not quite clear. There are a number of other diseases that are also inherited and mainly manifest in adulthood.” Henning adds that one of the theories is that the disease only manifests once combined with “normal wear and tear” of advancing age. Another possibility, he says, is that the damage caused by the mutation takes time to accumulate and only shows symptoms later in life.

August 2015

other culprits According to the MNDASA the cause of MND is not clear. Researchers believe they found a link between a cycad and MND in Guam, but Henning says a toxin theory has never been proven. “There was an initial small study that suggested occupational exposure to pesticides may be a risk factor, but subsequent larger population-based studies could not confirm this,” says Henning. Some researchers have indicated that a virus, which lies latent within the system for a long period, could cause MND. Henning refutes this: “There is absolutely no evidence for the disease being caused by a virus. The cause of sporadic MND is still unknown. Most experts believe it is caused by a combination of genetic predisposition and certain environmental triggers, still unknown.” He says there is another theory doing the rounds that the cause of sporadic MND is minute variations in the DNA that needs an additional factor, such as an environmental trigger, to cause the disease, which could also be one of the reasons why it’s so difficult to find the cause. Henning adds that another important consideration is that MND is probably not a disease, but a syndrome. “In other words, it is a collection of different diseases that share certain characteristics.”

Should parents be worried? “There is absolutely no proof that trauma injuries on the sports field can be linked to MND,” says Henning. He adds that repeated head trauma does carry risks. Boxers, for instance, can develop a form of dementia and a condition called chronic traumatic encephalopathy. However, there is a world of difference between a sport like boxing, where the aim is to inflict injury, and rugby, where injury is the unfortunate side effect. “The sum of evidence from many populationbased studies conducted over many years has shown that exercise is not a risk factor for MND,” says Henning. Studies have shown two examples where MND appears to be more common: in Italian soccer and American NFL (grid iron); however, it is suspected that this is due to a genetic predisposition in these groups, and has nothing to do with soccer or American football. In South Africa, four ex-international and provincial rugby players have been diagnosed since 2011, all of them younger than 45. It sounds excessive when we consider that 10 to 20 new cases per million are reported each year, but according to Henning, it is unlikely that taking part in sport alters one’s risk of developing MND.

motor neuron disease at a glance • Most people diagnosed with MND are over 40 years old. • Only 10% of people with MND develop it before the age of 45. • The highest incidence occurs between the ages of 50 and 70 years old. • Men are affected twice as often as women. • There is an increase in the amount of cases diagnosed worldwide, but this is most likely due to more accurate diagnostic testing. Because people tend to live longer, the incidence of a disease more common in older people will continue to increase. • If a parent has familial MND, children can be tested for the mutation, but this cannot be done in South Africa. DNA samples get sent overseas.

danger on the sports field Recent newspaper headlines have put the spotlight on celebrity sport stars, such as Joost van der Westhuizen, being devoured by the disease. The majority of sportsmad South Africans have suddenly taken notice of a disease first described in 1874. Watching little Johnny on the field during Bulletjie rugby training has brought the disease close to home.

Motor Neuron Disease Association of South Africa 021 531 6130 mndaofsa@global.co.za mnda.org.za

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photograph: Shutterstock.com

link to contact sport.

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August 2015

education

bunking school Truancy is a growing problem globally and it starts in the primary grades, affecting a child’s future if not addressed early. By GLYNIS HORNING

August 2015

emotional support demonstrated by their parents,” Van Breda reports in the journal Psychology. Whatever the cause of truancy, the effects can be considerable if it continues, he says. “General consensus seems to exist among researchers that truancy may be linked to serious, immediate and far-reaching consequences for youth, families, schools and communities.” It’s referred to as a “gateway crime”, he explains, because in the US most inmates in adult jails report their first appearance before a judge was as a juvenile on truancy charges.

parental responsibility But even at a less extreme level, poor attendance can have a damaging effect on a child’s education. In an interview in The Telegraph, the former British Minister of State for Schools, Nick Gibb, said children who attended school regularly had been found to be four times more likely to achieve five or more passes at the end of their schooling, including English and maths, than those who were persistently absent. In the UK and US, the problem is being addressed with stiff penalties. British parents can be fined £50 (about R800) for failing to ensure a child attends school, and this doubles if they don’t pay in 28 days. After 42 days they can be prosecuted and face imprisonment. They can also be subjected to “parenting contracts” – legally binding agreements forcing them to attend parenting courses and have counselling. According to the South African Schools Act (84 of 1996 as amended), it’s compulsory for children aged seven to 15 to attend school every day of the academic year. In terms of Section 3, any parent who “without just cause and after a

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PHOTOGRAPH: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM

laying truant – taking unauthorised absence from school – is “a serious issue for schools and communities worldwide,” reports Maynard van Breda, a senior lecturer in the Department of Psychology of Education at UNISA. In the UK alone it’s estimated to have soared by 40% in the past 20 years, with more than 62 000 children a year now skipping school without a good excuse. While statistics are hard to come by in South Africa*, educationalists are concerned – and not only in connection with rural and township schools, where added socioeconomic factors exacerbate the problem. “Some children miss school to do seasonal farm work to support impoverished families, and Aids orphans stay home to care for siblings in child-headed households,” says Prof Ruksana Osman, head of Wits School of Education. “But there’s lots of truancy from wealthy families where children end up in clubs and on drugs. Truancy is a social phenomenon that cuts across the full spectrum of society, and the reasons are varied and complex.” In a thesis on truancy, Gauteng psychologist Dr Monkie Muriel Moseki lists, among the reasons, personality factors such as poor social skills, learning problems, scholastic failure and low self-esteem; school factors such as poor facilities, poor teaching, overcrowding and bullying; and family factors such as poor parental involvement, violence in the home and substance abuse. In a study on truants in the Western Cape, a quarter of those interviewed said they had chosen to skip school and preferred to be on the streets because of “chaotic family lives, including broken traditional family structures, a serious lack of interest shown, and very little social and

written notice from the Head of Department (at school), fails to comply, is guilty of an offence and liable, on conviction, to a fine or to imprisonment not exceeding six months.” The Policy on Learner Attendance (General Notice 361 of 2010) stipulates that a medical certificate is required, says Carol Lottering, principal of Manor Gardens Primary in Durban. The upshot is that many principals feel they cannot officially grant a request for a child to be absent from school – for example, to take advantage of cheaper out-of-season holiday travel (the second most common reason, after sickness, for British parents keeping children out of school – a pattern believed to be common in privileged South African schools too). In reality, however, principals may tacitly give permission, depending on the individual case, and an undertaking by parents to see the child makes up work missed. Some independent schools, especially those with children from other countries, take special measures to work around this. “Holidays are planned at the school to accommodate all the children from the various countries,” says Shivani Sahadeo, deputy principal: foundation phase at Crawford Preparatory in Pretoria. “Therefore, during the July break we have a longer break so that parents can plan accordingly.” Her school, like most well-functioning schools, takes attendance seriously and has measures in place to promote it. “We call parents after three days of a child not being at school, and find out the reasons,” she says. “Parents are then responsible for making sure that the catch-up work is done so the child doesn’t fall behind. Teachers will keep the work aside and assist if new concepts were taught.” Crawford has a tardiness policy too, and parents receive letters when children are brought to school late. “Learning the responsibility of

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is your child at risk? Education authorities say a typical truant: • most likely comes from an unhappy or dysfunctional home. • has too much freedom at home or too little encouragement to learn. • is depressed and anxious. • struggles to learn and to pass subjects, and so has a negative self-image and negative feelings about teachers and school. • lacks a sense of fitting in, possibly due to parents’ inability to afford uniforms or other things that help them feel included. • has difficulty socialising, and doesn’t feel emotionally connected with peers and teachers, lacking a sense of belonging and community. • is at a dysfunctional school where the staff is disinterested.

get help If you can’t control the problem, approach your child’s teacher or principal or the Department of Basic Education (call 0800 202 933). Get counselling if necessary: call the SA Depression and Anxiety Group (Sadag) 0800 21 22 23, sms 31393 or sadag.org.za

getting to school and on time is an integral part of our standard of excellence, which prepares the children for success – instructional time is viewed as a precious resource.” Lottering echoes this: “At Manor Gardens Primary we take pride in being an excellent school, and two of the many factors contributing to this are the encouragement of 100% pupil and staff school attendance, and teachers teaching and testing from the first until the last day of term. If truancy means missing school on a regular basis for no good reason, ours is almost zero.” Where truancy is a problem, which Osman believes is mainly at poorly-functioning government schools, she says the solution should lie not in harsh penalties including fines and imprisonment, but in a “nuanced approach – after all, travel can be educational, and what about parents’ rights to take children out of school occasionally?” Truancy is a complex matter and can’t just be legislated, she says. “But that doesn’t mean it should be uncontrolled. It should be handled collaboratively by the collective decisions of parents, schools, learners and communities.” It comes down to having clear, regular communication between parents and schools, Osman concludes – and if a child is absent, good follow-up and negotiation, or access to help from the Department of Social Welfare and Development. “School is an extension of the home. And if we get that relationship right, we can manage the problem.” *The Department of Basic Education did not respond to questions on the incidence of truancy in South Africa, the nature and number of penalties imposed, and other related issues, in spite of numerous emails and telephone calls from the writer over three weeks.

August 2015

parenting

18 had at least one parent in the workforce, which means more families than ever are engaged in this balancing act. But the “Mommy Wars” have been raging since the early 80s. Achieving worklife balance has been the topic of many self-help books, seminars and movies, and working parents have been fighting the guilt of trundling off to work despite their little one’s tummy ache for more decades than any of us care to remember, so what has changed? “Context,” writes Tovah Klein, child psychologist and author of How Toddlers Thrive. “Increased opportunities and expectations have evolved in our hyperconnected world and women now participate in many, if not all, professions.”

integration

The struggle to find a happy medium between work and parenting isn’t a weakness; it’s human. SAMANTHA PAGE discovers that there are no easy answers, but there is hope.

t’s Honours Day at my son’s school, but instead of enjoying the choral items and the parade of neatly attired boys striding across the stage, I’m watching the clock. I’m expected back at the office in an hour, and I’m starting to wonder whether I’ll make it. My heart is galloping and my stomach is churning at the prospect of having to explain my tardiness to my boss, who explicitly asked me to come back to the office to attend an important meeting. I surreptitiously shoot off an email to my assistant, alerting her to a possible delay, careful to maintain eye contact with my son, who I know is watching me intently for any signs of distraction. A somewhat muted ping to my left, a vibrating handbag to my right, and, later, an embarrassed scuffle to answer a Mission Impossible ringtone behind, assures me I’m not alone in my juggling act. Believe me, the irony of that particular ringtone didn’t escape me. “Working parents are like plate spinners at a carnival,” says a Forbes magazine writer. “They juggle their children’s school

August 2015

schedules and activities while balancing their own work deadlines, attending conferences, and sneaking in the occasional shower.” Everyone I ask says the same thing: raising children is hard; so is building a career. “Having children and working to advance yourself professionally inevitably overlap since our child-bearing and careersetting years coincide,” says Becca, a senior sales executive in Cape Town, “and my company doesn’t have any policies in place to support working parents, let alone working women. Though I love my job, I hate feeling like I’m always sacrificing one thing to make the other work.” This eternal quest to find some semblance of balance is no longer just the domain of working mothers. An increasing number of dual-income families means that these issues hit home with working fathers too. Increasingly, dads are spending more hours parenting and taking care of the home. In one 2013 study, it was estimated that 88,2% of families with children under

beyond work-life balance While strides are being made to provide more flexibility and integration between work and home life, what can working parents do in the meantime to cope with the demands of career and family and the ever-increasing guilt? For starters, try to think beyond worklife balance. Experts agree that it’s an unrealistic goal that just makes you feel like you’re failing at everything. “Words like ‘multitasking’ and ‘balance’ are code words for the ability to run faster than a colleague or the ability to keep plates spinning in the air like the best Chinese juggler,” writes The Balance Myth author Teresa Taylor. “The problem with these concepts is that eventually one trips, or gravity wins.” “The reality is that the more involved you are with your child the more successful he will be,” says Gauteng-based educational psychologist Leila Abdool Gafoor. “Parental involvement enhances knowledge, confidence and self-esteem; however, children are stronger than we realise and often have such a high internal locus of control that they perform, unassisted, in some circumstances. Supporting your child does not mean attending all the events in which he participates. It involves being supportive at home, helping your child practise, and motivating and building his confidence with praise,” says Gafoor. Groundbreaking research from a study in the April Journal of Marriage and Family revealed that what matters most is not how

What matters most is not how many hours parents spend with their children, but rather how engaged parents are when they’re with their children. But in addition to legislation, change needs to happen at an organisational level, which means changes in structure and culture, and also at an individual level, suggests Marjolijn Dijksterhuis, director of the UCT Graduate School of Business’ Women in Leadership course.

many hours parents – particularly mothers – spend with their children, but rather how engaged parents are when they’re with their children. The study, which investigated children’s behaviour, emotional health and academic achievement, also concluded that magazine durban

PHOTOGRAPHS: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM

the myth of work-life balance

So, what are the realities for working parents? Can women do it all? Will your child be less successful at school while you build your career? There are no simple yes or no answers to these questions, though often that’s how they are framed. Perhaps work-life integration is the new normal, suggests Laura Vanderkam, author of I Know How She Does It: How Successful Women Make the Most of Their Time. “Increasingly people are rejecting the notion of work-life balance in favour of another phrase: work-life integration. Thanks to smartphones and the growing popularity of working remotely, moving work around on dimensions of time and space is not only possible, but has become the norm.” While this might not yet be commonplace in South Africa, some multinationals are starting to take note of reality, and with more women in the workplace, and many graduates weighing up local job opportunities with international ones, flexible working hours is fast becoming “a very attractive differentiator for a company to offer its new recruits and to have as a retention tool,” says Cathy Smith, at the time, HR director at IBM South and Central Africa.

Locally, the Clicks Group Limited is moving in an admirable direction, making work-life integration possible by implementing HR policies to support working parents. Awarded the Top Employers South Africa 2015 certification, the Clicks Group is living its transformation agenda, says Germinah Nyikana, Learning and Development Manager. “Clicks has implemented impressive flexibility policies, generous maternity benefits and has also gender-aligned their CSI policies.”

spending too much time with your children – especially if you’re stressed – can be detrimental to parents and children alike. Sustainable change always needs to happen from the inside out. While organisations should see the value in supporting working parents by implementing policies to that effect, individuals need to be bold enough to ask prospective employers about what kind of flexibility is offered, in the same way they would inquire about health care benefits. Families need to

change the way responsibilities are divvied, and parents should use pockets of time with their children with renewed focus on quality interactions. No family situation is, or ever will be, perfect, but as a working parent, you and your children have the power to create what works for you. Parents need to nurture and love their children, and children need to be empowered to support you and their family. When you make the shift in your head, you’ll almost always feel it in your heart.

six techniques for working parents By Teresa Taylor, author of The Balance Myth 1 Stop multitasking “Instead of trying to do several things at once, plan your day so that you have blocks of time (even if they’re only 10 or 15 minutes long), where you are working exclusively on only one thing.” 2 Assign a time limit to everything you do “I applied this rule to both work and home, and while it takes some practise and a willingness to let go of perfection, it helps you stay focused on the task at hand.” 3 Keep one calendar “Early in my career, I kept separate calendars for work and home, and meeting and appointment overlaps occurred, and I missed a few things. Noting personal and professional items on the same calendar prevents that.” 4 Have a daycare Plan B (and C, and D) “Daycare failure. Two words that panic any working mother. I learnt this the hard way when I had to fire a Babysitter From Hell on a day when my husband was out of town and I was late for a big meeting. On that occasion, luckily, my mom rode to the rescue – but from that point on, I always had at least one backup plan, just in case.” 5 Learn how to delegate “Many years ago, six months into a new, longdesired job, I thought I was going to have to resign, because I didn’t want the shame of being fired. My problem was that I didn’t know how to delegate the work, lead through others, or say no. Luckily, I had a boss who was willing to mentor me and who taught me that I needed to ask for help.” 6 Make your home life a priority “If your personal life is a mess, you’ll never be your best at work. You can’t take the mother out of the career woman or the career out of the mother, so use both to your advantage.”

magazine durban

August 2015

getaway

amsterdam

a celebration of history, art and light

You can experience a tremendous amount of this colourful city in just

he capital of the Netherlands is well known for its artistic heritage and narrow houses with beautiful gabled facades perched on meandering canals. It is home to the Dutch masters, as well as modern art collections, edgy fashion and colourful houseboats. The locals are friendly and (if your Afrikaans is good) easy to understand. Although the city deserves a month’s stay, two families managed to see and do a great deal in a recent two-day stopover.

A city icon and great photo op

The floating flower market

where have all the flowers gone?

Amsterdam, the most watery city in the world

August 2015

High-street fashion shopping in Kalverstraat

In Amsterdam, you’ll find them at the Floating Flower Market. Tulips of every hue and fragrance, and bulbs for sale, make this a good stop for the whole family. It’s also a great place to buy Dutch cheese. We couldn’t get enough of this national treasure and loaded our bags with a dozen different flavours, only to have it confiscated as we went through customs in Joburg. amsterdam.info/ shopping/flowermarket For more shopping we headed to Kalverstraat for high-street fashion and then on to Negenstraatjes as the teenagers were keen to experience the local designers. I was content to amble through the Jordaan, a charming shoppingeating-arty part of town. The Dutch have perfected the art of lighting, resulting in window displays that are true works of art. amsterdam.info/shopping

magazine durban

PHOTOGRAPHS: JOSIE DAVIS / shutterstock.com / De Jongh Photography / Christian Mueller / Birute Vijeikiene / Nando Machado

48 hours, as LISA MC NAMARA discovered on a recent trip with her family.

for a bit of culture Head to the Great Waterloo District. In the heart of Amsterdam’s Jewish quarter, the area around Waterlooplein is now the site of the Jewish Historical Museum and Rembrandt House. Waterlooplein itself is home to a wonderful flea market as well as the Muziektheater, home of the Dutch national opera and ballet companies. operaballet.nl A school readathon resulted in my daughter, Robyn, having just completed both The Diary of Anne Frank and The Fault in Our Stars days before landing in Amsterdam, so a trip to Anne Frank House was top of our list. Climbing the stairs, stepping through “the cupboard” and imagining how difficult it must have been to walk on the wooden floorboards without them creaking, made for memorable moments in this World War II hideout where Anne wrote her famous diary. annefrank.org Having grown up in a house where (a replica of) The Night Watch took centre stage, my husband was delighted to have the opportunity to view the real thing at the Rijksmuseum. It is located at the Museum Square in the borough Amsterdam South, close to the Van Gogh Museum (which sadly, we didn’t get to). Tickets for most museums can be booked online, way in advance, avoiding long queues and niggly children. Although a guided tour was on offer, we chose a multimedia tour at the Rijksmuseum, which the children found thoroughly entertaining. rijksmuseum.nl

eating out

Statue of Anne Frank on Westerkerk Plaza

Amsterdam is a warm and welcoming city, and its cuisine reflects its multiculturalism. We dined at delicious Turkish, Italian and traditionally Dutch eateries, some located down dark, cobbled lanes and others overlooking the beautifully lit canals and houseboats.

The Arborescence display at the Amsterdam Light Festival

Jack and Josie on one of the many beautiful bridges

getting around The central area of Amsterdam is easy to get around on foot. The GVB public transport office at Centraal Station has route maps and a guide to the ticketing system, which is based on zones with the same ticket valid on buses, metros and trams. gvb.nl The ideal way to get around is by bicycle; there are several rental agencies around town (about €7 daily or €30 weekly). But with two families, nine of us in total, we opted for trains and trams when we weren’t walking. If the weather is good, exploring on foot is the way to go. Start with the City Free Tour (cityfreetour.com/Amsterdam) to get your bearings, then move onto the canal bus or cruises with audio or commentary (canalcompany.nl). We were lucky enough to experience the Water Colours Cruise during the Amsterdam Light Festival. Inspired by the theme “The Bright City”, national and international artists displayed around 20 fantastic artworks of light.

Live like a local, rent a houseboat

Jack and Robyn ready to board

getting there…

Jack and Robyn enjoying Amsterdam’s public transport

magazine durban

Trams run from 6am until 12:30am

We flew KLM, and loved it! The seats were comfortable, toilets always clean and staff warm and professional. Visit klm.com and download the app for easy check-ins and flight updates.

August 2015

education

learning curves How children learn can impact their success in tests and exams. TAMLYN VINCENT discovers study methods that work and those that don’t.

what really works? A study by Dunlosky et al, published in the journal, Psychological Science, in 2013, had the five authors investigating study methods to learn which work and which don’t. Top of the pile of those that don’t work is highlighting. On the flip side, practise testing has proven to be very effective, as has distributed learning (when learners spread out their revision and learning times over a long period). “A good study technique starts at the beginning of the year and requires preparation before class, listening during class, proper daily revision and committing to good homework practices,” says Sharon Aitken, an educational psychologist in Cape Town. Consistent work during the year is important, not only because learners will gain an understanding of the work, but also because when it comes to exam time, they will only need to revise the notes they have made throughout the year and practise the skills they will need. For distributed learning to work, children need to apply their time management skills, ensuring that they schedule regular homework time.

practise makes perfect Making notes is a skill. Aitken says that notes should help you recall the work, not simply recognise it, as you will need to remember it. Mind maps or flash cards can work, says Brett Botha, who runs an extra tuition centre in Durban. These can be used effectively for practise testing, by placing a question on one side and the answer on the other. Nikki Wates, who has developed a study skills programme for primary school learners, says that flash cards are an effective

study method. “They’re portable, and the constant repetition means knowledge is committed to long-term memory. Mind maps use both the left and right side of the brain, and they work well for visual learners,” says Wates. But it is a difficult technique to grasp, and children often need to learn how to see the bigger picture, rather than isolated facts, which can take time and dedication from adults. Doing past papers and redoing worksheets are other ways to practise skills and test knowledge. “People learn more from their mistakes than from the things they get right,” says Botha. So children can also go over past tests and worksheets, to see where they went wrong and how to fix this. “It’s important to see the pattern of mistakes made,” advises Aitken, so look for problem areas, like going off track, writing too little or not understanding the question. Children can speak to their teachers to find out where they can improve. Learning from their mistakes also builds self-belief in children, says Botha.

parental involvement Another effective way to study is to teach someone else, which helps children understand the subject better, and helps them figure out where the gaps in their knowledge are, says Botha. Parents can be effective study partners here, encouraging children to check their notes to fill in any blanks. Parents can help in other ways too, particularly as supervisors. Aitken says that the brain only stops developing in the mid-20s, and executive function skills, like time management or the ability to delay gratification, are the last to develop. So parents should be continually monitoring, supervising and teaching children the skills they need to study effectively. “Parents are essential,” says Aitken, “as most children do not have the ability to apply study techniques consistently through the year, usually leaving it to the last minute.”

no cramming Last-minute revision is not effective. Cramming, learning select material, and reading through wads of text doesn’t commit the material to memory. Transferring knowledge into long-term memory is key, says Botha. But

a lot of study techniques, like highlighting or underlining, take time and don’t really help children. “Learners tend to highlight too much instead of picking out one or two key words from each fact, which is counter-productive,” notes Wates. Children end up rote learning, which takes time and doesn’t help them answer questions, as they struggle to separate essential from non-essential information, says Aitken. Memory techniques, or mnemonics, can help but only if children understand the work properly first, advises Aitken.

in short The study also pointed out that summarising wasn’t always effective, as it was time-consuming and there is some skill involved in doing it properly. If learners are simply rewriting notes, they probably won’t remember much, says Wates. But when they intentionally search for key words or main ideas, recall is likely to be better. Botha does say that each learner is different, and various techniques will work for each person. But dedicating time to effective studying is essential, as children need to first understand the material and then learn it. “So while certain techniques can improve your results, there is no replacement for consistently working during the year,” says Aitken.

exam time Everyone gets a little anxious during test and exam time. “Some anxiety is good as it helps you to think better,” notes Aitken. But too much can cause panic, and learners can go blank in the exam. If children have been studying throughout the year, are familiar with the work, and confident in their abilities, these can help to ease the nerves. Using relaxation techniques can also help. But if the anxiety has got to the stage where panic is going to set in, short-term anxiety-relieving medication can help. There are herbal tablets available, or you can speak to your doctor about short-term prescription medication. Medication reduces the phobic response, says Aitken, so in the long term children will probably need less medication.

• Time management: study courses for children and parents are available, or look for aids like daily planners to help children plan their time effectively. • A good diet, with plenty of nutrition, can help improve concentration and general health. • Fit in exercise. This keeps children healthy, while giving them an outlet for stress and tension. • Get enough sleep. This is also essential for concentration and wellbeing.

August 2015

magazine durban

PHOTOGRAPHS: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM

olour-coded notes, keyword clouds and cute drawings may make your child’s notes look wonderful, but do they help them learn? Considering the time and effort it takes to make such colourful masterpieces out of her study notes, your child should be excelling. Is she? It could be that these study techniques, while impressive to look at, aren’t actually effective.

magazine durban

August 2015

parenting

FUN SCIENCE

word? what’s in a

It’s not uncommon for children to swear, says

GARY KOEN, but the challenge for parents is to

remember my five-year-old son asking me: “Dad, what happens if you say the F-word?” He didn’t ask it in a naughty or precocious way – it was a genuine, thoughtful question, which required a genuine, thoughtful answer. And the truth is: nothing really happens if you say the F-word. Aunt Petunia may choke on her shortbread. Dad may go pale and edge nervously away from Mom. But other than that, nothing actually happens. The world still turns, the birds carry on singing, and just maybe a whole new conversation with your child begins. While you certainly don’t want to encourage your children to swear, it’s important to keep it in perspective if they do. Swearwords, by their very definition, are rude and offensive otherwise they wouldn’t be considered swearwords. Despite their offensive nature, however, they’re still just words. But like most words, how they are used is what matters.

August 2015

While sergeant-majors may have elevated swearing to a kind of art form, for the majority of us, swearing is a somewhat limited way of expressing ourselves. Children, however, are naturally inquisitive. For many of them, a new word can be something like a new toy, to be played and experimented with in a wide variety of situations – and they’ll often delight in the reactions they get. However, when fetching your six-year-old daughter from school and asking how her day was, you would not expect her to reply: “I had a beeping great day, thanks Dad. How was yours?” If you ever find yourself in such a predicament, your role is to educate and intervene so that they quickly learn when, if ever, there is an appropriate time to use a swearword.

watch your language The message you want your children to get is that, yes, there are swearwords, magazine durban

PHOTOGRAPH / ILLUSTRATION: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM

keep things in perspective.

which are easy to acquire and easy to use, but they should rather focus on expanding and growing their vocabulary so that they are able to express themselves and their feelings in ways that are both understandable and appropriate. In simple terms, you need them to understand that there are so many other words that they first need to learn before they even think of using swearwords. One of the main reasons that parents don’t want their children to swear is because it’s considered rude and disrespectful. Well-brought up children are not supposed to be rude and disrespectful. Furthermore, it’s considered very embarrassing for parents if their offspring engage in random acts of swearing, especially in front of other adults, as this may indicate that they have clearly failed in their duty to raise well-behaved children. Now, an important point to bear in mind is that swearwords are not the first words that children learn as they acquire the ability to speak. It’s not like it goes “Mama”, “Dada”, “doggie”, “#@*&!”. Instead, children learn these words from older brothers and sisters, but mostly from their parents. So, while you may be tempted to race for the soap when little Jonny lets fly a bunch of expletives, watching your own mouth in the presence of your children is equally important. Similarly, adults who don’t have children are often quite oblivious to the need to watch their language when visiting friends with children. It’s best to quickly yet discreetly remind them of who else might be overhearing the conversation. There is no need to be overly judgemental or critical, as it is unnecessary to demonise either the word or your friend. Most true friends will instantly respect your wishes.

can be sure that one of the others would quickly run to the teacher or a parent to tell on them. But among eight to 10 year olds, it would certainly not be unusual for them to sample a whole range of expletives and expressions. By the time they become teenagers, the fact that they swear hardly raises an eyebrow. Nevertheless, on each occasion, the context in which the swearing takes place remains consistently important.

words as weapons While children certainly do swear among themselves, it becomes a noticeable issue when they start swearing at their parents. This can become particularly difficult when they become teenagers capable of using words like blunt force weapons designed to exact maximum pain and hurt. When this happens, there are clear boundary and relationship issues at stake, which points towards an underlying frustration that needs more attention than the words themselves. Often you will find that these children do feel incredibly frustrated with their parents, particularly with their emphasis on how they should be behaving, and the expectation that they should always be good boys and girls without really knowing or feeling the benefit of why they should always be so good. Often their anger is a direct retaliation to their parents’ anxiety around how they are behaving, without attempting to understand why they are behaving like this. The parents, in turn, often feel hurt and misunderstood, and frequently resort to sulking themselves. What you will inevitably find, however, is that these children are looking for a real connection with their parents. Being openly rude is their last resort of making such a connection. Stopping the swearing

Children learn swearwords from older brothers and sisters, but mostly from their parents. Also bear in mind that while swearing may be considered rude and vulgar, it also presents an opportunity to be rude and vulgar. No-one is good all the time, and amongst friends and acquaintances, who is to say we shouldn’t use the occasion to fire off a few choice swearwords? However, it would be uncommon for a group of five to six year olds to swear among each other. The main reason for this is a sense of compliancy and obedience to their parents and a fear of the consequences. If a five year old swears among his friends, you magazine durban

and the rudeness and the hurt is very important, but it has to be replaced with genuine talking, listening and an authentic willingness to understand where these children are coming from and what they are feeling. This needs to be accompanied with the message that being able to communicate one’s anger and frustration is very important, and this can at times include swearing, but it is equally true that swearing cannot become the only way in which they express themselves and expect to be understood. August 2015

resource

unusual

school outings TAMLYN VINCENT gathers information on some of the most interesting Durban venues that can cater to school groups.

african art gallery Students are exposed to what the African Art Centre, a nonprofit organisation, does for previously marginalised artists and crafters. They also have the opportunity to see an array of traditional and contemporary craft from KwaZulu-Natal, including ceramics, beadwork, basketry and collections of trendy, quirky painted sculptures. The centre also houses works of art by established and younger, emerging fine artists from this province. Tours are suitable for children from Grade 4 and up. Booking is essential. Maximum number of heads Groups of 15–20, which must be supervised. Larger groups can be split into smaller sessions. Physical address 94 Florida Rd, Morningside Opening times 8:30am–5pm Monday–Friday Contact 031 312 3804/5, africanartcentre@afri-art.co.za or afriart.org.za

moses mabhida stadium tours

boot camp sa

The Moses Mabhida Stadium dominates the Durban skyline and schools have the opportunity to see the stadium up-close. Explore the state-of-the-art change rooms where your sporting heroes regroup, and walk through the same tunnels they’ve walked. Step onto the pitch and discover the suites where the rich and famous are entertained. This is just a taste of the captivating, allaccess stadium tour, suitable for Grade 1 upwards. All areas of the tour are wheelchair-friendly, and are carried out by professional and knowledgeable guides equipped with a host of fascinating facts. Maximum number of heads Two school groups, each consisting of 100 learners and educators, are allowed each day. These free slots must be booked, and only include the tour, not the Sky Car or other activities. Schools can take additional learners, or enjoy other activities, for a cost. Payment is per learner, per activity, which can include the Sky Car, the Express tour or the All Access tour. Physical address 44 Isaiah Ntshangase Rd, Durban Opening times Scheduled tours run at 9am and 10am. Other times may be arranged at an additional cost. Contact 031 582 8242/52, nduduzon@mmsdurban.com or mmstadium.com

The programmes offered for schools adopt an outcomesbased approach, creating an environment where participants can learn about themselves physically and emotionally. This is done by focusing on and developing social and life skills and building team spirit. Tasks involve problem-solving, giving children the opportunity to develop essential skills such as effective communication, taking on leadership roles, and planning and coordinating team efforts. One of the programmes on offer is the Junior Reconnaissance, which lasts three hours and is suitable for children from approximately five years old and upwards. This programme provides a stimulating environment in which learners can experience having fun outdoors, while getting active. Tasks and activities require teamwork and for the participants to interact, assist and encourage one another. It’s all about participants having a good time, getting energised through movement and taking part in a unique and active experience. It includes an introduction to Boot Camp, warm up and team war cries, constructive team missions and games, an obstacle course team challenge, tug-o-war and relay races. Programmes are also available for older learners, or you can create your own programme. Maximum number of heads Groups of up to 160 Physical address Stockville Rd, Giba Valley Opening times Bookings need to be made in advance. Office hours 9am–5pm Monday–Friday Contact 082 782 6432, info@boot-camp.co.za or boot-camp.co.za

makaranga garden’s mon chouchou adventures Learners in Grade 000 to Grade 3 can make use of these gardens for school excursions. These educational outings take place in a safe and secure environment, allowing children to experience and learn from nature. The gardens are home to two cycad collections, the biggest Shona stone art collection in the country as well as other statues from Italy, the magical waterfall, the enchanted garden, the labyrinth and an authentic Japanese garden complete with koi. There are three packages available, all of which include a work pack for each child, with writing materials and a workbook, a map for the teachers, an “I love Makaranga” badge and pledge card, and a group photo. Lunch is an optional extra, as is use of the swimming pool. A guided tour option is also available for Grades R–3, and for 25 children at a time, on a two-hour rotation, with a maximum of 50 children per school. Maximum number of heads Groups of up to 50. Only one school allowed per day. Physical address 1A Igwababa Ave, Kloof Opening times Availability from 8:30am–11:30am Contact 031 764 6616, reservations@makaranga.com or makaranga.com

sasa sugar terminal tours Tours of the sugar terminal teach children in Grade 1 upwards how sugar changes from cane to crystal. Children watch a short DVD about the sugar industry and then go on a tour of the silos. Here they will learn why the silos are shaped the way they are, how sugar is stored, and other interesting facts about this extensive industry. Booking is essential. Maximum number of heads Groups of up to 100 at a time. Silo tours can take up to 30 people at a time, so large groups are rotated. Physical address 25 Leuchars Rd, Durban Opening times 8:30am, 10am, 11:30am and 2pm Monday– Thursday; 8:30am, 10am and 11:30am Friday Contact 031 365 8153, tourguide@sasa.org.za or sasa.org.za

the harvestry Schools can choose from four different activities at this venue, which is geared specifically towards educational outings. At the Noo-Noo Farm, children learn about insects and go on a bug hunt. There are also insect rides. This outing is suitable for Grade R–8 learners and can accommodate 90–100 children. The Savage Jungle teaches them about mazes and map work, and includes a commando course, which is ideal for Grade 2–8 learners (60–90 learners per course). Plantopia looks at plants, and also includes fun rides and a Plant Plod. It is best for Grades 3–7, and can take 90–100 learners. The Skills Park offers team building for 60–90 children in Grades 4–7. Teams are challenged with games like the human chain,

August 2015

a tyre test and an elastic man challenge. Bookings are essential, and schools can book between one and three of the activities. Maximum number of heads Up to 200 learners at a time, divided into groups of approximately 30. There is a minimum group size of 25 children, but smaller groups can join together. Parents can attend as helpers where necessary, but are not encouraged to attend as spectators. Physical address G220 Clement Stott Rd, Botha’s Hill Opening times 9am–2:30pm Monday–Friday, varies depending on number of activities booked. Contact 031 765 2314, 072 446 7770, ctharvey@telkomsa. net or theharvestry.co.za magazine durban

calendar

what’s on in august

You can also access the calendar online at

childmag.co.za

Your guide for what to do, where to go and who to see. Compiled by TAMLYN VINCENT

FUN FOR CHILDREN – p24

ONLY FOR PARENTS – p24

Mini Town See miniature versions of Durban’s well-known buildings and sights in this miniature town.

Johnny Clegg Get up close and personal with a South African music icon in this acoustic show.

bump, baby & tot in tow – p24

how to help – p25

Johnson’s Baby Sense Seminar New and expecting parents can learn about their baby’s first year.

The Rare Bear Project Donate a knitted bear to children who are suffering from rare disorders.

PHOTOGRAPH: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM

fri

SPECIAL EVENTS – p24 Snoopy!!! This heart-warming family mini-musical is based on the much loved Peanuts comic strips.

magazine durban

August 2015

calendar

Sustainable Living Exhibition

14 fri

See a variety of exhibits, enjoy children’s activities, and visit the wellness clinic and blood bank. Donate clothes, shoes, books and toys for charity. Ends 16 August. Time: 9am–5pm. Venue: Durban Exhibition Centre. Cost: free entry. Contact: 031 311 4272, 031 311 4277 or dorothy.lutchmiah@ durban.gov.za

SPECIAL EVENTS 1 saturday Gordon Road Girls School fun day Time: 8am–2pm. Venue: 69 Gordon Rd, Morningside. Cost: free entry. Contact: 031 303 2628 or grgs.co.za Thomas More College Country Fair There is an indoor/outdoor expo, an excitement zone, tea garden, fun fair, beer garden, craft market and more. Time: 9am–4pm. Venue: 15 Sykes Rd, Kloof. Cost: parking R15. Contact: 031 764 8640 Seven Deadly Sins A fundraiser show for Ashton International College. Time: 7pm. Venue: cnr Albertina Way and M4, Ballito. Cost: R100. Contact: marketing1@ ashtonballito.co.za

4 tuesday Culture @ Kearsney Dance Festival Time: 7pm. Venue: Henderson Hall, Kearsney College, Old Main Rd, Botha’s Hill. Cost: R20. Book through Computicket: 0861 915 8000 or computicket.com

7 friday Pieter-Dirk Uys and Evita Bezuidenhout Live Friday night: Pieter-Dirk Uys’ Adapt or Die. Saturday: An Evening with Evita Bezuidenhout. Also 8 August. Time: 7:30pm. Venue: Hilton College Theatre, Hilton Rd, Pietermaritzburg. Cost: R180–R200. Book through Hilton Theatre: hiltontheatre.co.za Reach for a Dream Slipper Day Wear your slippers to work. Stickers available from Reach for a Dream or Wimpy stores. Cost: R10. For more info: slipperday.co.za Snoopy!!! A mini-musical based on the Peanuts comic strips. No children under 8. Ends 23 August. Time: 7pm Tuesday– Saturday, 1:30pm Saturday and Sunday. Venue: Elizabeth Sneddon Theatre, UKZN, Glenwood. Cost: R110–R200. Book through Computicket: computicket.com

8 saturday Penzance Primary 5km Takkie Dash The day includes fun rides, market stalls and food. Time: 8:30am. Venue: 10 Bartle Rd, Glenwood. Cost: R50 entry. Contact: 031 205 2271 or marketing@penzance.co.za

August 2015

9 sunday

classes, talks and workshops

playtime and story time

Choc Walk to Sani Pass Time: 7:30am. Venue: Border Post, Underberg. Cost: R225, includes meal and T-shirt. Contact: 086 111 2182, sanichoc@gmail.com or dbn@choc.org.za

Computers 4 Kids For children in Grades R–7. Time: 11am–12pm every Saturday. Venue: 124 Ridgeton Towers, 6 Aurora Dr, Umhlanga Ridge. Cost: R500 per month. Contact: 074 113 8364 or umhlanga@ computers4kids.co.za

Lucky Bean A safe children’s outdoor playground and indoor playbarn, with a coffee shop. Time: 9am–4pm, Tuesday– Sunday. Venue: 10 Cadmoor Rd, Assagay. Cost: R20 entrance fee. Contact: 082 216 3892 or luckybean.co

family outings

sport and physical activities

Books2You book fair Time: 10am–3pm 5 August, 7:30am–3pm 6 August, 7:30am–10:30am 7 August. Venue: Kenmont School. Also Winston Park Primary 11 and 12 August, Highbury Prep 13 and 14 August, and Northlands Primary 17–19 August. Cost: free entry. Contact: 031 705 7744 or orders@books2you.co.za Mini Town This miniature version of Durban boasts working model trains and ships. Time: 9:30am–4:30pm daily. Venue: 114 Snell Parade, Durban Beachfront. Cost: adults R25, children 2–13 years old R20. Contact: 031 337 7892

DurbaNite Race Dress up brightly and run 5km around Durban at night. For 9 years and older. 28 August. Time: 7pm. Venue: People’s Park, Moses Mabhida Stadium, Durban. Cost: R60. Contact: 071 521 2546, info@ durbaniterace.co.za or durbaniterace.co.za Michelle Clark Dance Academy Ballet, modern and tap lessons for children from 3 years old. Time: varies. Venue: Kloof Civic Hall, Old Main Rd. Cost: varies. Contact: 072 483 6222 or mcclark.dance@gmail.com

finding nature and outdoor play

classes, talks and workshops

13 thursday St Mary’s Golf Day Fundraiser for the 1000 Hills Community Helpers. Time: tbc. Venue: Cotswold Downs, 93 Inanda Rd, Hillcrest. Cost: R550 per player. Contact: 083 797 3880 or stanley@bakertillymm.co.za

15 saturday Children’s theatre day For children 6–12 years old. Also includes a movement and drumming workshop and Penelope Pixie’s Birthday Adventure show. Time: 10am. Venue: The Natal Playhouse, Anton Lembede Rd. Cost: theatre day R50. Book through Computicket: computicket.com Johnson’s Baby Sense Seminar Designed to convey expert information to new and expecting parents. A massage workshop takes place between the two sessions. Time: 8:30am–5pm. Venue: Three Cities Riverside Hotel, Durban North. Cost: R240 per seminar, both seminars R450, massage workshop R60. For more info: babysense.com

25 tuesday Johnny Clegg – Acoustic Ends 29 August. Time: 8:15pm, doors open 6:30pm. Venue: The Barnyard Theatre, Gateway. Cost: R450. Contact: 031 566 3045 or barnyardtheatres.co.za

28 friday George Ezra live Time: 5pm. Venue: Shongweni Polo Club, Hillcrest. Cost: R565– R865. Book through Seed Experiences: seed.nutickets.co.za Hobby-X Durban Ends 30 August. Time: 9am–6pm. Venue: ICC Durban. Cost: adults R50, children 6–12 years old R20. Contact: 011 478 3686, info@expotrends.co.za or hobby-x.co.za MamaMagic, The Baby Expo Over 200 exhibitors, specials, advice and more. Ends 30 August. Time: 9am–6pm. Venue: Durban Exhibition Centre. Cost: adults R60, children under 10 years old free. Contact: 011 465 8955 or mamamagic.co.za

Essenwood Market Time: 9am–2pm every Saturday. Venue: Steven Dlamini Rd, Essenwood. Cost: free entry. Contact: 031 208 1264 or essenwoodmarket.com I heart Market 1 August. Time: 9am–2pm. Venue: Moses Mabhida Stadium, Isaiah Ntshangase Rd. Cost: free entry. For more info: iheartmarket.blogspot.com The Play Market 9 August. Time: 9am–2pm. Venue: Giba Gorge Mountain Bike Park, 110 Stockville Rd, Westmead. Cost: R10 entry. Contact: 071 307 0823 or Facebook: The Play Market

Caversham Institute open day Find out about their early childhood development courses. 15 August. Time: 9am–11am. Venue: Penzance Primary School, Glenwood. Cost: tbc. Contact: 031 206 1412 or cavershaminstitute.co.za Domestic workers cooking course 18 and 25 August, and 1 and 8 September. Time: 8:30am–11am. Venue: Meryl’s School of Cooking, 1 Wingfield Rd, Kloof. Cost: R1 000. Contact: 031 764 6577 or merylschoolofcooking.co.za Fine Art classes for adults Time: 1pm–4pm every Saturday. Venue: The Breathing Space, 191 Bulwer Rd, Glenwood. Cost: R900 per term. Contact: 073 540 9210 or daniella.hartman@gmail.com North Coast artists meeting Art demo and tips. 8 August. Time: 9am. Venue: Church of the Blessed Sacrament, Newport Ave, Glenashley. Cost: members R30, visitors R40. For more info: north-coast-artists.com

on stage and screen

Snoopy!!! 7–23 August. Time: 7pm Tuesday–Saturday, 1:30pm Saturday and Sunday. Venue: Elizabeth Sneddon Theatre, UKZN, Glenwood. Cost: R110–R200. Book through Computicket: computicket.com

Bonfire Hearts A tribute to acoustic, unplugged and Celtic rock. 21 July–23 August. Time: 8pm Tuesday–Saturday, 2pm Sunday. Venue: The Barnyard Theatre, Gateway. Cost: varies. Contact: barnyardtheatres.co.za Johnny Clegg 25–29 August. Time: 8:15pm. Venue: The Barnyard Theatre, Gateway. Cost: R450. Contact: 031 566 3045 or barnyardtheatres.co.za

The Animal Farmyard Feed the animals and see milking demonstrations. Time: 9am–4:30pm daily, milking 10:30am and 3:30pm. Venue: 3 Lello Rd, Botha’s Hill. Cost: entry R20, rides R7. Contact: 031 765 2240 or animalfarmyard.co.za

markets

29 saturday Festival in the Hills A cultural extravaganza with activities, performances and workshops, with some of the best arts practitioners in South Africa. Some shows and workshops must be booked through Computicket, while others are free. Time: 8:30am–4:30pm. Venue: Curro HCA, 2 Blessing Ninela Rd, Hillcrest. Cost: varies. Contact: festivalinthehills.co.za

FUN FOR CHILDREN art, culture and science Fine art classes For children 8–15 years old. Time: 10am–12pm every Saturday. Venue: The Breathing Space, 191 Bulwer Rd, Glenwood. Cost: R800 per school term. Contact: 073 540 9210 or daniella. hartman@gmail.com

only for parents

26 wed

17th Jomba! Contemporary Dance Experience Ends 6 September. Time: 7:30pm daily, 2:30pm 30 August. Venue: Elizabeth Sneddon Theatre, UKZN, Glenwood. Cost: varies. Contact: 031 260 2506 or cca.ukzn.ac.za

support groups Choc – Childhood Cancer Foundation KZN Contact: 086 111 2182, dbn@choc. org.za or choc.org.za Dyspraxia South Africa Support Group Contact: info@dyspraxiasouthafrica.co.za or dyspraxiasouthafrica.co.za

bump, baby & Tot in tow

classes, talks and workshops Baby massage Babies from birth to one year old welcome. Time: varies. Venues: Berea, Glenmore, Hillcrest, Morningside and Umhlanga. Cost: R600–R650. Contact: 072 623 3266 or holisticbaby.co.za magazine durban

Edubabe Childminder training, first aid workshops and cooking classes. Time: varies. Venue: Glenwood. Cost: varies. Contact: 071 968 1007 or durban@edubabe.co.za Johnson’s Baby Sense Seminar Time: 8:30am–5pm. Venue: Three Cities Riverside Hotel, Durban North. Cost: R60–R240. For more info: babysense.com Pregnancy yoga Time: 9:30am–10:45am, every Saturday. Venue: The Yoga Sanctuary, 49 Delaware Ave, Glenashley. Cost: R260 per month. Contact: 076 410 1410 or angela@rautenbach.co.za

old. Time: varies. Venues: Durban North and Winston Park. Cost: varies. For more info: shongololoshakers.co.za

playtime and story time

The Highway Hospice They provide comfort and manage pain and stress in the last days of life. For only R50 per month or R600 a year you can join the 2000 Club. You stand a chance of winning R20 000 every month or smaller consolation prizes. Contact: 031 208 6110 or fundraising@hospice.co.za The Rare Bear Project Raising funds for the Rare Disease Society of South Africa. Buy a soft toy online, which is hand-delivered to children in hospitals. Bears can be donated for R100. For more info: rarediseases.co.za/productspage/product-category/rare-bear/

Little Me Moms and Toddlers playgroups For toddlers 1–3,5 years old and moms. Time: varies. Venue: Sunningdale. Cost: R90. Contact: 084 821 6668 or eleanors@servatech.co.za Moms and Babes and Moms and Tots workshops Venues: Amanzimtoti, Berea, Durban North, Upper Highway and Westville. Cost: varies. For more info: momsandbabes.co.za or momsandtots.co.za Shongololo Shakers Music, puppet and movement classes for children 0–4 years

support groups Mothers 2 Baby For moms finding motherhood challenging. Time: 10am– 11:30am, third Thursday every month. Venue: Hillcrest Private Hospital, Kassier Rd. Cost: free. Contact: 061 453 3718

how to help

it’s party time For more help planning your child’s party visit

childmag.co.za/ resources/birthday-parties

don’t miss out! For a free listing, email your event to durban@childmag.co.za. Information must be received by 31 July for the September issue, and must include all relevant details. No guarantee can be given that it will be published. To post an event online, visit childmag.co.za

magazine durban

August 2015

finishing touch

morning mayhem It’s no mean feat to get herself and her children ready for the day, so ANÉL LEWIS is happy just to make it out the front door. fluffy unicorn, four Lego pieces and a hairy lollipop. No cup. I decide to cut my losses and return to the kitchen. As we move down the passage, something ricochets off my foot. The cup! Conor sits on the counter while I make his tea so that he can make sure I add the chocolate milkshake powder. I don’t ask questions at this time of the morning. If he wants chocolate tea, so be it. I hear footsteps and Erin peeps around the corner. She wants to draw. “Now? Okay, okay, let’s get the crayons.” I reckon I can dress her while she’s drawing. I bring their clothes. “No, I don’t want that!” shouts Conor. Erin’s not interested in the top I have for her either. “It’s too short and it doesn’t match.” Great, all I need now is fashion advice from my four year old. I dash upstairs and get myself ready. No time for hair and make-up. Finally, we

Erin, Anél and Conor

are in the car, but then Erin wails: “Mom, something smells.” We’re trying to pottytrain Conor and things are still more miss than hit. I grab Conor and head back upstairs to change his pants. Back in the car, as we pull out of the garage, Erin whispers: “Mom, I need to take something starting with ‘b’ to school.” You’ve got to be kidding me. Instead of shouting the first expletive I can think of starting with ‘b’, I dash inside and grab a banana. We’re more than 15 minutes late. I screech into the traffic queue, my wet hair frizzing in the warmth of the car. But then from the backseat I hear, “Hot dog, jumping frog... elbow kirky”. The two of

them are singing their hearts out, blissfully unaware of the pandemonium it took just to get them out of the door. To passing motorists, we probably look like the Von Trapp family going on a summer holiday – despite the fact that Conor is still in his pyjama top and Erin’s hair resembles something from the J&B Met. But it’s okay. Any day that starts with my children singing a song – and a cup of chocolate tea – is bound to be a good one. Anél Lewis has invested in a massive white board so she can plan ahead for the week. She’s also prepacked containers with teabags and chocolate milk powder to save time in the mornings.

family marketplace

August 2015

magazine durban

PHOTOGRAPH: Susie Leblond Photography

hy is it that no amount of planning the night before ever really prepares you for the mayhem that comes in the morning? The day starts when Conor rams a dinosaur or some or other rescue vehicle up my nose. “Tea,” he whispers. “I need tea.” I step on the cat as we make our treacherous descent down the stairs. There is only one plastic receptacle in the entire kitchen that will do for Conor’s morning cuppa. And of course, on Monday mornings said cup is usually MIA. Conor starts to howl. I pick him up and we head to the playroom. I step on something wet and cold. It’s a half-masticated piece of boerewors from Sunday’s braai. But there’s no time to wipe it off because Conor is in hysterics about his cup and his tea. Down onto all fours I go to search under the couch. I find a soggy dish towel wrapped around a

book extract

tastes like

freedom Try these delicious LCHF recipes from KAREN THOMSON and KERRY HAMMERTON’S Sugar Free for a sustainable sugar-free lifestyle. vegetarian thin-crust cheese pizza serves 8 ingredients | base • 3 eggs • 225g grated mozzarella cheese • 112g grated cheddar cheese • ground crystals or flaked salt and ground black pepper • 1 crushed garlic clove (optional) • 1 tsp mixed herbs ingredients | toppings • tomato paste or purée • raw toppings of your choice, e.g. mushrooms, feta cheese, olives, buffalo mozzarella, basil leaves and cherry tomatoes. Non-vegetarian options include ham and anchovies.

method Preheat the oven to 180°C. Grease a medium-sized baking tray with butter. Make the base by beating the eggs together. Mix with all the cheese, seasoning, garlic and herbs. Evenly spread the egg and cheese mixture on the baking tray, almost to the edges, making it as thin as possible. Bake for 15–25 minutes or until the base is golden brown. Remove the pizza base from the oven and while warm, spread with a thin layer of tomato paste or purée. Add the raw toppings and put the pizza under the oven grill for approximately 4–5 minutes, or until the toppings are cooked.

nutty flapjacks Note: If you’re eating flapjacks with whipped cream and berries, remember to add additional fat and fruit portions. makes 6 ingredients • 1 tsp butter (or 1 tsp coconut oil) batter • 3 eggs • cup (100g) nut flour (or substitute coconut flour) • ¼ tsp bicarbonate of soda • 1 tbsp milk, coconut milk or almond milk • scraped seeds of 1 vanilla pod (optional but delicious)

PHOTOGRAPHS: Donna Lewis and Caroline Gardner

method Make the flapjack mixture by whisking the eggs together. Gradually stir the egg liquid into the dry ingredients. Once the egg and flour are combined, add the milk with vanilla, and mix

through. Let the batter stand for 5 minutes. Heat a small frying pan and melt the butter or coconut oil. Add a ladleful of flapjack mixture. Cook for a few minutes at medium heat. Wait for air bubbles to appear on top before flipping the flapjacks with a spatula and cooking the other side. Remove flapjacks from the pan and keep warm. Serve with whipped cream and fresh or stewed berries. Tip: Make your own nut flour by blending nuts such as almonds, walnuts or macadamias in a food processor until they resemble coarse flour. Don’t overdo it or your nut flour will turn into nut butter.

about the book Sugar Free by Karen Thomson and Kerry Hammerton (Sunbird Publishers) is packed with scientific research and nutritional advice to help you understand sugar and carb addiction. The book also has dietician-approved weekly meal plans and recipes, including options for vegetarians, along with journal exercises, to help you break the mental, physical and emotional traps of old eating patterns. Sugar Free is available from all good bookstores for R250.