Child magazine | JHB June 2014

J O B U R G ’ S

b e s t

gu i d e

f o r

p a r e n t s

the

parenting issue the healthy way to sleep train do you take note of age restrictions? assessing developmental milestones

www.childmag.co.za

June 2014

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health

parenting after a break-up fun ways to keep your children busy over the holidays

education

entertainment

Hunter House P U B L I S H IN G

Welcome to the parenting issue.

Publisher Lisa Mc Namara • lisa@childmag.co.za

Editorial

We receive a steady stream of emails at Child magazine from parents desperately seeking help. I can empathise. Some days parenting feels like I’m running an obstacle course – clear one hurdle and the next one looms. My daughters have their ups and downs, which is normal, but the downs make clearing those hurdles seem impossible.

Managing Editor Marina Zietsman • marina@childmag.co.za Features Editor Marc de Chazal • features@childmag.co.za Resource Editor Simone Jeffery • joburg@childmag.co.za Editorial Assistant Lucille Kemp • capetown@childmag.co.za Copy Editor Debbie Hathway

Quite honestly, parenting often seems like a series of face-plants, because I can’t prevent my foot from catching the crossbar.

Art Designers Nikki-leigh Piper • studio@childmag.co.za Mariette Barkhuizen • studio@childmag.co.za Mark Vincer • studio3@childmag.co.za

Advertising Lisa Mc Namara • lisa@childmag.co.za

Client Relations Renee Bruning • jhbsales@childmag.co.za

And yet, despite everything, parenting is still the most fun to be had on the planet. You see, my daughters have

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a wicked sense of humour. They make me laugh till I cry and I have to sit down holding my stomach. Most often, the laughter is at my expense, but they are not averse to a healthy dose of selfdeprecation either.

When my family laughs, I know all will be well, now and when my children leave home – just as long as they keep coming back for mealtimes, filled with the laughter that expresses triumph over the trials and tribulations of life.

Happy Father’s Day! It’s precious to be one and to have one. I miss mine so much.

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copy. We are under no obligation to return unsolicited copy. The magazine, or part thereof, may not be reproduced or adapted without the prior written permission of the publisher. We take care to ensure our articles are accurate and balanced but cannot accept responsibility for loss or damage that may arise from reading them.

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June 2014

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contents june 2014

11 upfront

regulars

3 a note from lisa

8 upfront with paul Paul Kerton gives

6 over to you readers respond

advice on how to protect our children from the winter chill

10 pregnancy news – designer babies Tamlyn Vincent looks at DNA

features

testing on embryos

16 reasonable restriction Christina Castle admits that age restrictions have a place in this world

18 separate parenting when parents split up, children should not suffer.

Daniel O’Connell gives some advice

20 reaction time parents should have an action plan for children who suffer from severe allergies. By Vanessa Papas

22 balancing me-time moms need to know when to let go and when to be present. By Helena Kingwill

24 the meaning of milestones Lisa Lazarus explains early developmental assessments for preschoolers

26 the boomerang child Gary Koen explains the essence behind this modern family phenomenon

health 9 where there’s smoke...

Vanessa Papas warns against the debilitating effects of second-hand smoke

11 best for baby – put your fears to bed if you stick to a routine, the battle against babies not sleeping is almost won. By Lucille Kemp

12 dealing with difference – hair today, gone tomorrow is your child suffering from hair loss? It might be Loose Anagen Syndrome, says Marina Zietsman

28 resource – a club for everyone the holidays are sorted with this handy guide of activities and programmes for children.

Compiled by Simone Jeffery

34 a good read for the whole family 38 what’s on in june 46 finishing touch children are like sponges, so we have got to watch ourselves, says Cassandra Shaw

classified ads 43 let’s party 46 family marketplace

this month’s cover images are supplied by: Joburg

Cape Town

Durban

Pretoria

Claudia De Nobrega Photography • claudiadenobrega.com

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letters

au pair blues I employed an au pair, because as a mom I thought that’s what was best for my child. I could barely afford it, but did it for my child’s wellbeing. I was also desperate to find someone of the same faith (Muslim), thinking that we would have similar values. Au pairs of my faith are very hard to come by, so I was very limited.

I conducted a few interviews and chose the one that I thought best suited our family. She turned out to be a nightmare. After a couple of months, her true colours showed. Here are my tips for parents who are looking at employing an au pair…

Check all the information. Check qualifications such as first-aid certificates. Even if a copy of a certificate is supplied, phone the company offering the course to double check. If no work reference numbers are given, find the company’s phone number on the internet.

Applicants not supplying contact information are more than likely hiding something. Don’t only check references for childcare experience. This is important with regard to absenteeism and the nature of the person. The more you research, the more you will find out. Don’t be satisfied with one good reference. Contact all references, even if a reference letter is supplied. Check that the applicant did the work they claim to have done on their CV and not merely that he/she has worked there. By law an

employer has to supply the employee with a certificate of service. The reference letter should also preferably be on a letterhead. Phone the company and speak to the person referenced. I am aware of a case where the applicant had arranged for a friend to pretend to be the former employer. Be wary of applicants who have gaps in their employment history, even if such gaps seem justified, such as illness. Be wary of applicants who have short periods of employment. Just because an applicant is educated and has a good vocabulary does not mean that they are mature or responsible enough to look after your child or any other child for that matter. Look out for websites that only act as a platform for au pairs to chat. These websites don’t necessarily do training and placements. Draw up a three-month contract for a new au pair so that you may test the waters.

Nuraan Adam

congrats, child magazine!

Huge congratulations on Child magazine turning 10; more specifically I would like to commend you and your contributors for the incredible work that you do. To have witnessed the magazine’s growth over the years is inspiring. You have taken the education of parents and teachers to another level. I am often referring parents and teachers to articles in your publication. This is

over to you the school uniform debate In reply to Suzy Oliveira’s letter (April 2014) on expensive school uniforms: it is unfortunate that the cost of school uniforms is so stifling. Maybe the parent body can explore different options. Our school has a shop, where learners who have outgrown their uniforms, or don’t need them for some reason, donate their uniforms to the shop and they are then sold at a fraction of the price. The monies go to the school or they go to another worthy cause. Another option would be to put pressure on the school to adopt a standard uniform that can be reasonably purchased at chain stores. If a badge is necessary, then that could be sold separately and sewn onto the shirt or blazer by hand. Perhaps this would reduce the cost. There might be other feasible alternatives, but this initiative must come to the school from the parent body.

Michele Engelberg

online response In response to the online article “tub time” where Tamlyn Vincent gives five bath time activities for children to play in the tub and learn at the same time I love these ideas. Definitely gets me thinking differently about bath time with my daughter and son. I have always allowed my children to play in the bath, but this definitely brings bath time to a whole new level. I am going to start

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a magazine that is, in my mind, of an international standard, both in its content and the progressive philosophy of childhood that underpins all its articles.

This truly is a South African magazine to be proud of, and the fact that parents and teachers are able to access this resource free of charge is nothing short of incredible.

Though I am a small contributor to the educational landscape of our country and have a very small voice in the greater scheme of things, please accept my heartfelt thanks and gratitude for the amazing work that you are doing.

Justin Skea Preparatory School Head, St Cyprians, Cape Town

thanks for a great read My day begins well when I drop my daughter at preschool and find our copy of Child magazine on her shelf. I loved Nicole’s letter titled “loving vermin” (May 2014). If she weren’t already in the field of creative writing or journalism, I would recommend she consider it. Well-written and beautifully descriptive, she had me grinning through the entire piece as I pictured this interesting household and could so identify with the whole scene. Keep up the great work Child magazine.

Liesl

Let us know what’s on your mind. Send your letters or comments to marina@childmag.co.za or PO Box 12002, Mill Street, 8010.

incorporating these ideas and it sounds like fun times ahead. Thank you for a great magazine. I look forward each month to receiving it from my children’s school. A very informative and interesting read.

Anonymous In response to the article “easing the itch of baby eczema” Our little boy had terrible eczema. We tried various remedies, but nothing worked. About a year ago I stumbled across a range of local hypoallergenic products for children. With some advice from their chemist and a new body care regime, which cut out all synthetic products and petrochemical-based products, he’s been eczema free ever since.

Jean In response to the online article “bullying – the parent’s guide” At my daughter’s school someone wrote “Loosa” on a picture that a girl drew of herself. These pictures were put up in the corridor of the primary school, which houses Grade RR to Grade 4. I am quite perturbed by this as it is extremely unusual that someone randomly picked her picture and wrote over her face. This form of passive-aggression is cowardly, hurtful and plain mean.

Concerned parent

My daughter just started Grade 2 at a new school and there is a boy in her class who is always calling her names, shoving and tripping her. I brought this to the teacher’s attention. She promised to look into it and then suggested moving my daughter to another class. My question to her was: “Why is the bully not moved?“ Her response was that the boy has been at the school since last year and my daughter is still new, so she can make friends in a new class. I refused the suggestion, because I feel we will be telling my daughter that it is her fault that she is being bullied by moving her to another class and it may encourage the boy to bully other children.

Anonymous

erratum In the May issue of Child magazine, we printed a recipe for quick and easy cupcakes on page 29. Under the ingredients the proverbial printer gremlin turned the measurement for the castor sugar into a w. It should read 1/3 cup castor sugar. We apologise for any inconvenience this may have caused. subscribe to our newsletter and win Our wins have moved online. Please subscribe to our newsletter and enter our weekly competitions.

To subscribe, visit childmag.co.za

We reserve the right to edit and shorten submitted letters.

The opinions reflected here are those of our readers and are not necessarily held by Hunter House Publishing.

Post a comment online at childmag.co.za

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rrr, winter is upon us, which means cold, and if you live in Cape Town, also wet weather. Here are seven things you need to do, or not do, to winterproof your children and insulate them from the rigours of the down season...

Don’t let them skip breakfast Children miss breakfast because they are lazy, not because they aren’t hungry. Halfway through the morning their tummies will rumble and a body starved of nutrients, carbs and protein will pillage these from their vital organs, leaving them feeling weak, light-headed and unable to concentrate. Insist that they eat something.

Make sure they wear warm clothes You’ve probably spent a small fortune on hats, scarves, snoods, coats, gloves and boots. Don’t be fooled by their cries of “but I’m warm enough” when they are stretched out in their underwear on the underfloor heating. Lock them out in the garden for 10 minutes to simulate waiting at the school gate, and then see if they are still warm. (Tip: always name every item of a child’s clothing. They will forget stuff. Frequently.)

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winter-proof PAUL KERTON suggests a few things we can do to insulate our children from the chill.

Get everybody up half an hour earlier Everything takes longer in winter. There are more layers to consider, so coordinating clothes and getting dressed can be an obstacle course. Food and drinks need to be warmed up, and then there’s driving in the rain to slow things down even more... so get your family moving earlier.

Take vitamins and cod liver oil Administer whatever works for you to stem the tsunami of infections from the classroom. And if your child gets sick, leave them at home. Start a course of vitamin C in advance and boost their immune system so that when everyone else sneezes over them, they can fight the germs. A flu jab is also a good idea, if you believe they work.

Be careful of slippery surfaces We tend to be a bit blasé in South Africa because it doesn’t really get much below 10 degrees unless you are on the Lesotho border. But the winters are trending colder, so beware of even a slight hint of frost because a broken leg or arm is not fun.

And watch the roads, because a skid is no laughing matter either.

Break out the board games and the required spirit with which to play them. You will be spending a monumental amount of time inside, and you don’t want your little anti-social treasures locked in their bedrooms glued to a screen all day playing in private. Encourage them to play a “family” game and talk together.

Teenagers may sniff the air, but once they get into it, even they will have fun. Release the competitive instinct. Forget all that wussy “it doesn’t matter whether you win or lose, it’s how you play the game” nonsense. (Tip: make sure Aunt Mavis doesn’t cheat again.)

Stock up on tasty treats and snacks to dip into throughout the day. It helps if these are reasonably healthy.

Follow Paul on Twitter: @fabdad1

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ILLUSTRATION: MARK VINCER

upfront with paul

health

where there’s smoke…

Second-hand smoke puts your child at risk of developing

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chronic diseases. By VANESSA PAPAS

PHOTOGRAPH: shutterSTOCK.COM

oung children are more vulnerable to second-hand smoke than adults. “This is because their developing lungs receive a higher concentration of inhaled smoke than older lungs,” says Ayesha Seedat, a registered dietician at the Heart and Stroke Foundation South Africa. “Children also have a faster breathing rate – as many as 60 (inhalations) a minute compared to that of a normal adult at 14 to 18 times a minute, which means they inhale second-hand smoke faster than adults.”

Babies and children exposed to second-hand smoke on a daily basis have more than triple the risk of developing lung cancer later in life compared to those growing up in smoke-free environments. “Their risk of having breathing problems, ear infections and tooth decay are also increased, along with serious illnesses such as meningitis, asthma, tuberculosis, heart disease and cancer. Babies exposed to second-hand smoke have an increased risk of sudden infant death syndrome, or cot death, while smoking during pregnancy leads to increased risks of miscarriage, still birth, low birth weight and premature birth. Children of mothers who smoked during pregnancy are more likely to develop asthma by the age of seven and more likely to suffer delays in their physical and mental development,” says Seedat.

what’s in that puff?

Magdalene Seguin, clinical specialist at the Cancer Association of South Africa (Cansa), says exposure of children to tobacco smoke is especially harmful in confined areas, indoors and in cars. “Second-hand smoke consists of both the smoke that is exhaled from the lungs of smokers and the smoke that is given off by burning tobacco between puffs. There is no safe level of exposure to second-hand smoke and even brief exposure can be harmful.” About half of the children worldwide, around 700 million, are exposed to second-hand smoke, particularly at home.

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She adds, “A single cigarette smoked in a room with poor ventilation generates much higher concentrations of toxic substances in the air than normal, everyday activities in the city. Toxic compounds from second-hand smoke linger in the air for an extended period of time; its nicotine compounds are deposited on household surfaces and in dust. The air quality inside a car with someone smoking is worse than the air quality found in smoky pubs.”

smoking regulations The Tobacco Products Control Act of 1993 makes health warnings on cigarette boxes law, prohibiting tobacco sales to persons under the age of 18 years old and regulating smoking in public places. Cigarette advertising and sponsorship has been banned since 1999. Adults may not smoke in a car when there is a passenger younger than 12 years old. Smoking is not allowed in premises, including private homes used for commercial childcare activities such as crèches, schooling or tutoring. The tobacco industry may not use “viral” marketing such as themed parties to target young people. Cigarette vending machines that sell tobacco products cannot be used to sell crisps, chocolates and other products that would appeal to children.

did you know?

Apart from nicotine, more than 4 000 dangerous chemical compounds are created in the smoke of a burning cigarette. At least 40 are known carcinogens that cause cancer in humans and many are highly poisonous. They include substances such as butane, found in lighter fuel, cadmium, found in batteries and formaldehyde, also used to preserve dead bodies.

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pregnancy news

designer babies

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magine being able to give children a life free from the worry of genetic disease by eliminating genetic abnormalities from the very start. With the development of genetic testing on embryos, these possibilities are a reality.

Preimplantation genetic testing (PGT) is being done more frequently with in vitro fertilisation (IVF), to test embryos’ DNA before putting them back in the womb. Dr Lawrence Gobetz, an infertility specialist in Joburg, explains that there are two reasons to biopsy embryos. The first is to perform preimplantation genetic screening (PGS), where the number of chromosomes is checked. If there aren’t 24 chromosomes, the embryo is at risk of Down’s syndrome or other chromosomal abnormalities. PGS can improve the success rates of pregnancy, says Jaysen Knezovich, laboratory director at Genesis Genetics. “Embryos that are genetically normal are more compatible with life,” says Knezovich, so failure rates are reduced.

But Gobetz cautions that it’s possible to find no normal embryos, especially with older couples, thereby excluding them from IVF. Preimplantation genetic diagnosis (PGD), the other reason to biopsy embryos, is done to exclude genetic diseases such as Tay Sachs or cystic fibrosis, that one or both parents have or carry, says Gobetz. A specific test is designed around the genetic profiles of the parents, to identify a genetic condition in an embryo in order to eliminate it.

For many couples, going through fertility treatments is a difficult experience. Taryn, a mom in Cape Town, found her treatments stressful and invasive, especially when she and her husband didn’t know what the problem was. “PGT provides insight into the possible reason for pregnancy failures,” says Knezovich, which is valuable for the doctor and patient, especially if it means preventing the trauma of more pregnancy losses. Taryn points out that treatments are expensive anyway, so she would rather pay more for these tests and have answers. And couples that discover IVF isn’t a viable option will at least have that answer.

DNA testing on embryos can provide hopeful parents with

going forward

For some people, the issue isn’t the cost but the ethics. There are religious arguments and others claiming potential misuse.

Thanks to advances in DNA profiling it could soon be possible to get all sorts of genetic information from an embryo, giving rise to concerns about creating designer babies.

According to Knezovich the debates are mostly unresolved.

In the meantime, genetic testing is helping to build healthy families, although there are legal regulations. An embryo’s sex can be determined, for example, but performing gender selection without a sound medical reason is illegal in South Africa.

Genetic testing still has a long way to go, with new methods only in experimental phases. And even when they do become available they are likely to be very expensive. For now, Gobetz hopes that PGT will become more cost effective in the next few years, giving more couples the chance to have a healthy child.

the answers they need, but is it right? TAMLYN VINCENT

family value While PGD can help to exclude genetic diseases, it can’t tell how many chromosomes an embryo has. So Gobetz says it makes sense for couples doing PGD to also do PGS, but this is costly. PGS currently costs around R22 000, while PGD can cost R35 000 for one test.

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PHOTOGRAPH: shutterstock.com

takes a closer look.

best for baby

put your fears to bed Your child will be sleeping if you stick to routine, are consistent in your efforts and you go about training good

PHOTOGRAPH: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM

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sleeping habits gently and lovingly. By LUCILLE KEMP

ape Town-based mom Trudy found herself sleep deprived and frazzled for three straight years. Her first-born, Phyllis, just wouldn’t sleep. “The first time I considered sleep training was when Phyllis was about nine months old. Controlled crying was the method advised,” she says. An accumulated 90 minutes into the first (and last) session, Phyllis was inconsolable, Trudy’s last nerve was well and truly worked and she had kicked her husband out of the house. On many other desperate occasions Trudy would stow away in her car in an attempt to drive her restless daughter to sleep – Milnerton to Melkbos and back – to no avail.

Phyllis’s sleep problems may have become infinitely more resolvable if Trudy had known the advice of Sister Lilian Paramor: “With little ones the goal should not be to sleep through as their parents have been led to believe.

Finding practical ways of getting sufficient rest, even if not in one long stretch, is actually what is called for.”

While you may be advised, how you get there is your call. “If co-sleeping is working for your family, why change

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it? However, if co-sleeping is affecting your marriage or no-one is sleeping anyway, you may need to check your routine,” says Sister Ann Richardson.

teaching healthy sleeping patterns “The central aim of all sleep training is to train a baby to go to sleep without help,” says Anne Gethin and Beth Macgregor in the book Helping Your Baby Sleep. Given this, Sister Ann says to be aware of the “awake” time of your child as this will help you focus on preventing overtiredness, over stimulation and overfeeding, which all too often causes a desperate parent to fall back on feeding, rocking, bouncing or going for drives to induce sleep.

Keep your environment as womb-like and conducive to sleep as possible – wind down in the late afternoon to foster a calm atmosphere in the home.

When you’re in the throes of sleep training, things can get hairy and experts’ advice seems to repeatedly point to finding ways for calm to reign. The Parent Centre in Cape Town, which runs a moms’ circle, says that parents find a lot of comfort in sharing their experiences and lessons with

each other: “Some moms have tried leaving a night light on, playing a CD softly in the background and ensuring that TV noise is kept to a minimum.” Sister Lilian advises that you “don’t count the number of times your child wakes at night; in fact, pretend like it doesn’t matter. Don’t jump at the first sound your baby makes, but don’t ever let them cry inconsolably either. Plan ahead for wakeful nights by having everything at hand that you might need – keep the lights low and conversation to a minimum as you do what you have to right there in bed so that all that needs to be done is simply cuddle down together to continue sleep.”

helpful reading • S ister Lilian’s Babycare Companion by Lilian Paramor (NB Publishers) • Sleep Sense by Ann Richardson and Megan Faure (Metz Press) • Your Baby and Child by Penelope Leach (Knopf Publishing Group)

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dealing with difference

hair today, gone tomorrow When grown-ups start losing hair, we often joke about it, but hair loss in children is no laughing matter. MARINA ZIETSMAN looks at Loose Anagen Syndrome.

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our six-year-old daughter has short, thin, fair hair. When she wakes up in the mornings, clumps of her locks are left behind on the pillow. When she removes her swimming cap, she also removes bunches of hair. When a friend accidently pulls her hair while they play, she pulls out a batch of hair. Loose Anagen Syndrome (LAS) is not physically painful, but it can be psychologically damaging.

medically speaking LAS is a recently diagnosed syndrome, which is believed to be a genetic disorder.

Research has shown that the syndrome affects mostly girls between the ages of two and six years old who have fair or blonde hair. According to the American Hair Loss Association, it is not clear why the hair is loose, “but the root sheaths that normally surround and protect the hair shaft in the

For daily care, Titus suggests the following: “Five percent Minoxidil solution applied twice daily helps to stimulate the hair follicles and prolong the growth cycle. Aminexil and procapil can also be used as it keeps the hair longer in the growth phase. It also ensures better anchorage of the hair follicle and improves circulation.” Titus recommends that you use good shampoos designed to stimulate hair growth as well as conditioners to lubricate and nourish it, “but get these products from reputable companies.”

It’s also important to be gentle when washing LAS hair and to gently massage the scalp, as this stimulates the blood flow, which brings nourishment to the roots and stimulates growth. “Sufferers should also drink enough water and consider a proteinrich diet because hair consists of keratin, a protein material,” says Titus.

There is no cure for LAS, but in most cases the condition improves as children grow older and disappears completely in puberty.

dealing with LAS There is no cure for LAS, but in most cases the condition improves as children grow older and disappears completely in puberty. Elma Titus, a trichologist with over 35 years’ experience, suggests parents should consult a dermatologist or trichologist if LAS is suspected. Trichology is a branch of dermatology that deals with the scientific study of the health of hair and the scalp. Specialists will perform two basic tests to confirm LAS: the hair-pull test and the hair-plug trichogram.

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how to explain it to your child Natalie de Gouveia, a registered counsellor and play therapist from Linksfield in Joburg, says it may seem daunting to try explaining LAS to your child, especially considering you don’t have all the answers. De Gouveia gives three tips to help you through the process: • educate yourself “Find out all there is to know about LAS; the causes, the symptoms and treatments,” says De Gouveia.

• establish how severe your child’s case is “Every case is unique and the more you understand your specific situation, the better you are equipped to handle it and explain it to your child,” she adds.

• talk to your child about the condition “Keep the explanation age-appropriate,” says De Gouveia. “If your child is three magazine joburg

PHOTOGRAPH: shutterstock.com

skin are not produced properly.” It also seems that because the root sheaths are not fully formed, the hair fibre is poorly anchored in the hair follicle. It may also be a keratin disorder, which is hereditary.

years old, you shouldn’t use technical terms that will confuse them. Keep it simple: ‘Do you know how your brain tells your eyes to open and close? Well, something in your brain is telling your hair not to grow properly.’” De Gouveia says as a child grows older you can give more detailed explanations. Then reassure your child: “Tell them that boys and girls of all ages and races can get LAS. No-one knows yet why this happens, but it is not because of something they did. The good news is that LAS just makes hair fall out. It doesn’t hurt or make you tired, like the flu or chicken pox. You can carry on playing and having fun.”

coping with the emotional effects of LAS in the classroom...

Having LAS, or any other physical deformity, can be isolating and make a child feel vulnerable. “For a child who is ‘different’ from their peers, teasing, stares and general isolation may be common,” says De Gouveia. This will inevitably lead to a low self-esteem. It could also lead to the child avoiding school, which will negatively impact academic performance.

“A child in this position is aware of her difference and, if unaddressed, feelings of shame and guilt will accompany the already muddled feelings,” De Gouveia says. “Because of the shame involved, the child may actually feel that their ‘problem’ is not something to talk about.”

De Gouveia reiterates that it’s important for parents of a child with LAS to provide support structures in all areas of the child’s life, including school. Approach the child’s school directly, and together with the teachers assess whether this is an issue of confidentiality. “If this is the case, the child and parents’ wishes need to be respected,” says De Gouveia.

“LAS itself, after all, will not hold the child back from being involved in social and school activities. If confidentiality is not an issue, teachers can help by educating peers about LAS.” She says peers become more aware of what it feels like to be “different” when a caring and supportive environment is created.

Activities designed to awaken tolerance, awareness and respect should help the child with LAS feel comfortable in the classroom and in social situations.

and at home…

“You’ll be surprised at how many people are going through the same situation and who share your feelings,” says De Gouveia, who recommends that parents find a support group. “If your child is being bullied or struggling with low self-esteem, you may want to attend therapy.” Your child will be able to express himself in a safe, comfortable way while gaining confidence and learning that they are not that different after all, just unique.

how LAS presents itself • Hair is lustreless and does not grow.

• Sparse growth of thin, fine hair and patchy baldness, and hair that does not grow longer.

• Hair can be easily and painlessly pulled out of the scalp, though the hair is not fragile.

• Hair at the back of the head or skull tends to be rough and does not lie flat.

• Hair also appears frizzy, unmanageable and unruly.

• You will find decreased hair density and unruly hair, especially in children.

• LAS hardly ever presents itself in other parts of the body that have hair.

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your child’s life

reasonable restriction

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CHRISTINA CASTLE confesses to pushing the boundaries of age restrictions without even realising it, but admits they’re there for a good reason.

kay, confession time. My children grew up on a diet of Monty Python. There was no escaping it. I blame their father for this and he quite happily accepts full responsibility. I think he’s proud of it actually. “Better than Bieber,” he’d say. And while my eldest was quite entertaining when he performed his own rendition of “silly walks” in a Grade 2 “show and tell” to an audience that may have found him just a little bit quirky, my youngest’s recital of “sit on my face and tell me that you love me” to a class of eight year olds was neither entertaining nor quirky. It was just downright out of line.

Whether you like it or not, age restrictions are applied to much of our media and entertainment in an attempt to protect our children from subject matter that is just not appropriate. While these age restrictions work primarily as a guide, it is the responsibility of parents and caregivers to practise them. And no matter how vigilant we may be to restrict our children from viewing and experiencing unsuitable material, they are going to be exposed to it.

movie marathon instead. Between Cape Town and Sydney he watched three movies with age restrictions beyond his years.

“You watched Django Unchained?” I asked in disbelief as we stood at baggage collection.

“Mom, it’s an Oscar-nominated movie,” he replied, as if that made it any better.

“It’s a Quentin Tarantino film. It’s so inappropriate.”

And just for the record, I did watch Django Unchained on our flight back to Cape Town, and yes, it did require damage control. Lots of it. It’s a great movie though, just not for 13 year olds.

gaming While many TV and computer games are absolutely harmless, there are some that are “so not”.

And, wait for it, another confession – we own a few of the “so not” variety. I put it down to ignorance on my part. Oh, don’t get me wrong, my boys knew exactly what they were getting when they begged me to buy them Grand Theft Auto (with their pocket money, I must add). “We play it all the time at Michael’s.” I just didn’t pay any attention to the age restriction on the box. I didn’t even think to look for it. I grew up in an era of Space Invaders and Pac-Man. But ignorance is bliss, until you realise your children are blowing each other’s virtual brains out.

Games like these, exposed to the incorrect age groups, can be damaging. Games like these are now sitting in my underwear drawer. They’ll never think to look for them there.

movies and tv shows I recently took a long haul flight with my 13 year old. I sleep well on a plane. My son, however, does not and opted for a

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While you can control what your children watch in your own home or at the cinema, you can’t necessarily control the movies and TV shows your child is going to be exposed to outside the home. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve told my sons they can’t watch a particular movie at home because they are simply not old enough, only to be told “but I’ve seen it before – at Henry’s place.”

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PHOTOGRAPHS: shutterstock.com

While you can control what your children watch in your own home or at the cinema, you can’t necessarily control what your child is going to be exposed to outside the home.

books Around the age of 12 my boys both discovered Spud. Everyone was reading it. And while I was over the moon that they had finally picked up a book and were so keen to read, the content (although highly appropriate for what they were soon to become) was, I felt, a little out of their reach. My husband (who is a boy) rolled his eyes and called me a prude. So I got over it and they klapped the series in no time.

However, there are some little readers who are years ahead of their age in terms of their reading abilities and perfectly capable of flying through the likes of The Hunger Games trilogy by Suzanne Collins or the Twilight series by Stephenie Meyer. Seductive vampires and reality killing shows are a bit different to a 13 year old who is waiting for his testicles to drop.

My advice: read what they are reading. Chapter for chapter if need be. It’s a great way to connect with your child and opens the way for interesting conversation on sometimes difficult or challenging subjects. Also, you’ll be exposed to a whole genre of books that you won’t necessarily find at book club.

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music and concerts Little Monsters beware! While I hear Lady Gaga puts on a fabulous show, it may be a little hard for some six year olds to digest. Or even the odd 46 year old. Am I being a prude again? No-one could have predicted that giant vagina. And I am just so glad I didn’t have to explain that one to an unsuspecting Little Monster.

But let’s not only point fingers at Lady Gaga; commercial music in general is loaded with dodgy lyrics, innuendo and visuals. And while most of it goes straight over those beautiful little heads, there will be something that sticks. We are exposed to it through every electronic medium, whether we like it or not. Listen to what your child is listening to. And flip that switch if you don’t think it’s appropriate.

social media This is a scary one and requires vigilance on your part particularly. And while the likes of Facebook, Twitter,

Instagram and Pinterest are a great way to connect with friends and other social networks, they also expose users to potential threat and danger. We need a certain maturity to operate in that space and need to understand the consequences. Many teens and adults get it wrong. How can we expect a tween to get it right? The age restriction for many social media platforms is 13. Yet there are so many children younger than 13 on these networks with their parents’ consent – potentially exposed to strangers every time they go online. Parents need access to their children’s social network profiles no matter how old their children are.

They need to say “you are too young for this, now go outside and kick a ball.”

Oh dear, I think I may have said too much. And best I end this article before I incriminate myself further. But let me attempt a little redemption first by asking that you acknowledge and respect these age restrictions.

To read the classifications the Film and Publication Board applies, visit childmag.co.za/content/agerestrictions

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17

parenting

separate parenting Children often get the raw end of the deal when their parents split up.

DANIEL O’CONNELL explains how separated parents can put their children first, despite their personal issues.

Recently a former neighbour told me of a divorced friend who (prior to the separation) had been frequently cheated on. Despite these understandable grounds for resentment, she recognised that his infidelity had nothing to do with her children’s relationship with their father. Apparently the children’s time today is split equally between the parents.

If the elements of the story are to be believed, it suggests an emotionally mature attitude on behalf of the woman scorned. Very likely in emotional pain, she nevertheless put her children first.

Cawood, who encourages parents to aim for an amicable working relationship after separation or divorce, says it is an exceptional attitude “to be able to work through negative emotions in a safe space – away from the children, so that they are able to remember that the children still have two parents who will be in their lives for a very long time.”

The ability to talk things out, whatever the circumstances of the break-up, should override all else, because you now have children.

in search of the high road The good news is it shouldn’t have to be that way. To borrow from business and political terminology, we can identify the high and the low roads and choose the one we wish to follow.

The high road would be you and your once significant other raising your children with similar values, with the aspirational crest on that track being the occasional picnic and movie together with the little ones. I’ve seen it happen, with varying degrees of success; some are comfortable in the company of their ex, and will even accept their new partners.

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the lonely path

Cawood says that from her experience about 50% of separated and divorced couples manage to work together as co-parents. But there will always be those who refuse to engage in an amicable relationship. This is the low road in separated parenting.

It’s a lonely path where the ability to hear the other parent is sacrificed at the altar of a range of relationship evils, such as anger, insecurity and hatred, none of which have any connection to what is likely the best thing they ever produced – their children.

Every interaction becomes a battlefield littered with the corpses of miscommunication, misinterpretation and sometimes even good intention. It’s a landscape that you don’t wish to visit, especially when the little ones are around. This is where mediators earn their money.

The problem is that it’s easy to talk the talk and smile before a mediator and mutual friends. Just as it is easy to bark at the other parent when together with the children and no-one else is around.

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PHOTOGRAPH: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM

i

t’s often said that parenting isn’t for the faint-hearted. One year after starting the legal struggle for fair time with my children, I know this to be true.

Most of you reading this will already know the struggle that comes with parenting – schedules shattered, sleep stolen and for some, incomes under increasing pressure. But one of the more unfortunate and ugly facts of parenting in South Africa is just how many of us end up having to do it alone.

The “unfortunate” aspect is not related to the hard work it is for the single parent, but rather to the children being deprived of seeing their parents all of the time (assuming that the parents are devoted to their children).

Having been through the process, I wanted to know what effect this deprivation may have had on my children, so I turned to family and school counsellor Anne Cawood.

“Children verbalise how much they miss seeing each parent when they are with the other one,” says Cawood. “Time, which should be relaxed and ‘normal’, can become very intense and somewhat unnatural. A parent who has not seen the child for a week may try to spend every minute of a precious contact weekend with the child. It is really challenging to find the balance and to try to make this precious time less intense.”

“Children definitely do pick up even the smallest hostile vibe,” says Cawood. “They develop an effective radar system, which alerts them to the stresses and emotional and physical negatives around them. They watch body language and also pick up bits of conversations – and put their own connotations to them. For this reason, I always advise parents to never make unnecessarily negative comments about the other parent. Try to always remember that children deserve to have the best possible relationship with each parent.”

warzones A child’s future happiness and development doesn’t allow for our wounded egos and insecurities. Deep-rooted or not, we have to get over ourselves. If I’ve learnt one thing about becoming a parent – whatever my faults – it is that you grow up almost overnight, with a new set of priorities the next morning.

The ability to talk things out, whatever the circumstances of the break-up and however hard it is, should override all else, because you now have children. Communication is even more critical now – between the parents, with the children and when all of you are together.

You may have read all the books and “Dear Mary” columns in magazines, but if you don’t have a common language in which you communicate post-separation, the parenting will suffer.

There are many ways in which miscommunication reveals itself. Take food, that glorious battlefield on which our children eat. Ideally, we’re all well-read, and aware that overfeeding children – especially on the wrong stuff – isn’t healthy. Let’s assume that a child loves oats, and cold Rooibos with honey and lemon instead of juice. That makes Parent A happy. Parent B insists on sugary cereal and fruit juice instead, with the occasional chocolate milkshake at bedtime. Parent A’s question of “why” may seem normal to some, but it’s not as clear-cut as one may think.

Cawood says nutrition is a big issue between parents: “In my experience, it is often a side-effect of an acrimonious post-separation relationship. For example, if one parent prescribes a healthy, low sugar diet, the other will often (consciously or unconsciously) dig their heels in and disagree. Food just becomes yet another ‘weapon’ to aim at the ex... and the children become the losers.”

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In a world where the effects of an over-supply of sugar and eating too much, such as diabetes and obesity, are easily accessible via the internet, our choices should be simple. Cawood says when she has facilitated in situations where nutrition has become a battlefield, she finds that the power struggle decreases when she calls in a professional, such as a nutritionist.

If the issue of food is a warzone, other aspects of the relationship are likely to be similarly affected. Just think of education, religion, and even possible new relationships.

In such cases, it’s difficult to think of a life without mediators, facilitators, psychologists and lawyers.

the way forward For the first-time separated parent, it can be like living someone else’s life. If we keep it simple, the best we can hope for is to focus on the children. Our futures as divorced and separated parents should be clear – we are no longer together, and parenting separately.

If you really love your children, don’t spoil them – that’s just projecting your own stuff.

What children really need is love and attention rather than countless objects. And teaching them to “want” and “expect” before they can speak properly surely carries its own large question marks. More toys and chocolates are not going to make their mommy and daddy live together again, or the situation disappear, but it will leave them with issues not of their own choosing, which is nothing short of cruel.

We all know that children are resilient, but Cawood nevertheless issues what I was going to refer to as a cautionary note – although I think “warning” is a more apt word: “Parents need to be aware that their children will be emotionally affected by unskilled, immature and hostile communication between them.”

It’s simple. There really is no alternative. The situation is what it is. We have to move on and do what is best for our little ones. “It all depends on the parents... If parents are okay, their children will be too.”

Anne Cawood deals with many of these issues in her book, Adjusting the Boundaries: Helping Children and Teens Cope with Separation and Divorce (Metz Press).

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19

health

reaction time When faced with a child having a severe allergic attack, time is of the essence. VANESSA PAPAS explains why an action plan

ore and more cases are being reported worldwide of children dying or suffering multiple heart attacks at school following a major allergic attack. A recent survey by Pharma Dynamics, which involved 800 learners between the ages of 10 and 18 and teachers from independent, government and Model C schools across the country, found that none of the students nor the teachers knew what to do in case of a severe allergic attack, putting children’s lives at risk.

According to international studies the incidence of anaphylaxis (a serious allergic reaction that is rapid in onset and may even cause death) is on the increase. It’s as simple as a teacher offering a child a treat for good behaviour, without knowing about the child’s allergy, or children sharing their lunchboxes with their friends who may be allergic.

Dr Michael Levin, head of the division of paediatric allergy at the Red Cross Children’s Hospital, explains that the main causes of allergic attacks in children is foods, with peanuts being the biggest culprit. Other foods include milk,

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egg, wheat, soy, fish and shellfish. Certain medications can also cause reactions, such as antibiotics (penicillins and cephalosporins), painkillers (aspirin, NSAIDS, opiates) and radio contrast media (X-ray based imaging techniques).

Bee and wasp stings are also a major cause. Rarer causes are blood products, vaccines and allergen extracts in people undergoing injection immunotherapy.

“There are certain common signs that indicate a child is having a severe allergic attack,” says Levin. “Look out for urticarial rashes (hives), angioedema (swelling) and tingling of the palms and soles. Signs of severe anaphylactic attacks include upper airway (high-pitched ‘grating’ sound, coughing, throat clearing) or lower airway (wheezing, difficulty breathing) obstruction, abdominal issues (pain and vomiting), loss of blood pressure (leading to fast weak pulses and loss of consciousness) and central nervous signs (feeling of panic or extreme lethargy).”

Levin says it’s important that parents and teachers know the difference between a mild episode and a severe

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PHOTOGRAPH: shutterstock.com

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is essential to ensure your child is treated quickly.

anaphylactic attack. “For mild attacks, an antihistamine is usually sufficient, but the child should not be left alone. They should be closely observed, their relatives called, and if they have an adrenaline injection (such as epipen), it should be urgently located in case the attack progresses. For severe attacks the adrenaline should be injected into the large muscle of the thigh immediately.

If the child is asthmatic a dose of their reliever pump should be administered (six to 10 puffs, one at a time) and the antihistamine given. The ambulance must be called and notified that this is an emergency. If there is no improvement in five minutes a second dose of adrenaline should be given.”

living with an allergic child

It’s important that parents and teachers know the difference between a mild episode and a severe anaphylactic attack.

Lori Bentley from Joburg knows first hand how challenging it is to have a child with a severe allergy. At just days old, Lori’s son Ross was diagnosed with eczema and later developed asthma. When he was five years old he suffered a near-fatal severe allergic attack.

“He was bouncing on a hammock that had collected a layer of pollen and had a severe asthma attack from inhaling the pollen,” says Lori. “We were just lucky because I saw him within seconds of the reaction and rushed him to hospital, where they treated him and then told me he was critical. He tested positive for seven airborne allergens as well as peanuts and is at risk of life-threatening anaphylactic attacks. While we have done everything in

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our power to avoid nuts, we have had a few close calls.

A friend brought around some homemade soup a family member had cooked for her. When Ross broke out in hives and started complaining of stomach cramps I knew he was having an allergic reaction, but had no idea where the nut products had come from. After investigating, it turned out that the vegetables in the soup had been sautéed in peanut oil. There have been a few other cases over the years, so we always have to be on our toes.”

Lori explains that having a food allergic child changes what you would think of as a “normal” life. “You develop a new ‘normal’ where you read labels on every new product you consider buying. You adapt recipes, leaving out the nuts if they are present and can be left out. You always ask if your child has his meds on him when he goes anywhere.

And you worry a lot when they go out on trips with their school or with friends. My son has also had to accept his condition. He has developed a system where he asks about ingredients before he eats anything that is not homecooked. He’s had to endure bullying at school (boys in his class throwing peanuts at him) until the school was alerted to it and put a stop to it. He used to be very paranoid about nuts and coming into contact with them, but has calmed down as he’s grown older. I have become an allergy advocate as a result. My biggest achievement has been educating and training the staff of my child’s school in recognising an allergic reaction and what to do about it.”

allergy action plan • E nsure your child’s school is fully aware of his or her allergies.

• Provide the school with emergency contact information and clear procedures for handling medical issues.

• Explain the early warning signs of an allergic attack to your child’s teachers so they can be alert for early symptoms.

• Provide the school with multiple adrenaline auto-injectors to use in case of anaphylaxis and be sure to check the expiry date. Teachers should also be shown how to administer the medication regularly.

• Be sure that your child fully understands his or her allergies and knows what they can and cannot eat or be exposed to.

• Send special snacks and treats your child can eat so he or she doesn’t feel left out on special occasions.

• Get a medical bracelet for your child to wear.

For guidelines on how to treat children suffering from an allergic attack or how to use an adrenaline autoinjector, parents and teachers can visit allergysa.org or allergyexpert.co.za To connect with other parents of children with allergies, visit Facebook /AllergyEpicentre or allergyepicentre.wordpress.com

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21

family life

balancing me-time for your children. By HELENA KINGWILL

ost of us don’t regularly allow time to tune in to ourselves and our families. We’re often too caught up with tedious tasks, such as doing the dishes or paying the rent. But making time for ourselves and our children should be prioritised over the pressures we create for ourselves. It’s as important as our health. We shouldn’t wait for the wheels to come off. In her book Mother-Daughter Wisdom, Christiane Northrup puts it well: “When the fuel required for mothering and nurturing others is not replenished regularly, breakdowns and failures in the nurturing system manifest as depression, anxiety and even violence that affect both mothers and children.”

If the wheels come off you are no good to anyone, so taking time to create a calm and peaceful inner and outer space is an excellent investment. “Your children are the direct beneficiaries of you taking time for yourself and looking after your personal space,” says Cape Town parenting counsellor Karen Quail. She explains that we will be in a better space mentally and therefore more capable of engaging properly with our children. In order to find this time, it’s essential to clear

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space to create a calmer and more ordered life, advises Quail. This requires a very conscious discernment about our daily choices.

routines and rituals Clearing space for quality time requires decluttering the home as well as the daily schedule. “It’s about realising that when you say ‘yes’ to something – such as a commitment to be on another committee, a social engagement or another extramural activity for your child – you are automatically saying ‘no’ to family time or time for yourself,” says Quail.

When we are overwhelmed by the busyness of our lives, it helps to create chunks of time for each activity, advises Josie Brincat (50), a single mom from Durban.

“It’s about being aware of what is needed for all and then creating a routine that suits you,” says Josie, who recalls that when her son was a baby, routine quality time with him was her priority. “I could find a way to make space for me-time through the support of my friends, however irregular that was, and I set aside quality time with my son as a scheduled event.”

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Give yourself the gift of time so that you can be more present

Quail recommends ritual and rhythm in our weekly routines as a way to create consistency and peace in the home. This includes a ritual time to connect with your partner, and a regular ritual activity with your children – perhaps at bedtime to read or to talk about the day.

An excellent bedtime ritual is the rose and thorn discussion. Ask your child what their “rose” was that day – what went well. And then what their “thorn” was – what didn’t work out. It’s an effective way of releasing unresolved issues as well as counting our blessings.

“These exercises act as a pressure valve for releasing stress from the day,” Quail points out. “If a ritual is regular, children feel safe because they know they can count on it.”

using me-time wisely Taking time for yourself gets easier as your children grow up, and finding that time depends in part on having a trustworthy support network.

“Everyone has different needs,” says Quail. “It’s important to tune in to what the right thing is for you.

Author and philosopher Joseph Campbell encouraged people to follow their bliss, which simply means follow your heart or your passion and find your life’s purpose. ‘Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls,’ he wrote. If you constructively use me-time to develop your passion, your self-esteem and general happiness will improve, as will your ability to love.”

But what do you do when you finally get that moment to yourself? I posed the question to a few parents.

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“If you give more to yourself, you have more to give to others,” says Sally de Jager (42), a Cape Town mother of two. “I don’t feel guilty about taking time for myself, because if I go for a run on the beach, I’m in a much better mood afterwards, and that affects my children too.”

Thandi O’Hagen (42) of Joburg shares custody of her son with her ex-husband. “I have one week all to myself, and the next I spend as much time with Kei as possible. But every Tuesday he goes to his granny and I go to a dance class. My exercise time is my best me-time,” she says.

James Cloete (42), a father of two from Cape Town, feels the same way about his me-time: “My wife allows me to go for a surf because she knows I am a much nicer person to be with afterwards.”

There is a danger, however, of the balance swinging out of kilter when me-time becomes an escapist habit.

Chantal van Straten* (36), a Port Elizabeth mother of a three year old, was weary because her husband had gone surfing for a fourth day in a row while on holiday. “I wanted us to do some fun things together as a family,” she says.

Taking time out should not burden the other partner nor compromise the children. It’s about quality versus quantity.

The ability to create decent, bite-sized chunks of time for yourself and focused time for your family requires intention, boundaries and organisation. The size of the chunks increases as our children grow up and we graduate to new levels of freedom. We have to know when to let go and when to be present. * Name changed

you need me-time when…

• y ou are feeling ungrounded, and keep forgetting and losing things; • you are staying up late to do creative things for yourself and not sleeping properly at night; • you are feeling depressed and are easily distracted; • you are running ragged – your hair is dishevelled, your clothes are worn out and you can’t remember the last time you really had fun.

recommended reading • T ears and Tantrums by Aletha Solter (Published by Aware Parenting Books, awareparenting.com) • S implicity Parenting by Kim John Payne (Published by Simplicity Parenting, simplicityparenting.com) • Mother-Daughter Wisdom – Creating a Legacy of Physical and Emotional Health by Dr Christiane Northrup (Published by Piatkus)

June 2014

23

education

the meaning of

milestones

Are you concerned that your child is developmentally delayed? LISA LAZARUS explains how early developmental

y

assessments work for preschool children.

ou know the type: the parent who, with studied indifference, “lets slip” that her five year old is reading Harry Potter or that her son, just four, can swim the length of a 50-metre pool, whereas your child can’t even hop without falling on his face. And then you panic. It seems that not only schools but we ourselves are continually ranking children. How seriously should we be taking milestones during the preschool years?

When it comes to milestones, there are many “grey areas”, says Dr Kirsty Donald, a paediatric neurologist at Red Cross Children’s Hospital. She explains that a milestone refers to a range of ages during which a behaviour – motor, cognitive or social/emotional – should occur. Milestones are based on the assessment of large cohorts of children in developed countries. The cut-off age is the age at which 95% of children are expected to have achieved a specific competence.

Let’s say your child is racing through her milestones – could you have a genius on your hands? Donald explains that even though early language assessment is probably the best predictor of later cognitive outcomes, assessments at a young age are better at picking up developmental delays than predicting later academic success.

“Some gifted programmes in the United States,” says Donald, “conduct early developmental assessments when the child is three; however, a third to half of those children selected for giftedness only exhibit mediocre academic achievement later in life.”

For Jan Murray-Nobbs, principal of The Hill, a preprimary school in Cape Town, there is an educational benefit in assessing where a child is missing his milestones. “Gaps or unidentified lags in any of the developmental spheres can compromise a child’s learning experience and readiness for further learning,” she says.

However, both Donald and Murray-Nobbs stress that milestones need to be taken in context. Donald means that you need to look at all areas of a young child’s development and not focus purely on the missed milestone. “With young children there is a tendency to emphasise motor milestones, such as walking, but if you only pay attention to this

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PHOTOGRAPH: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM

what milestones mean

milestone and not the entire development of the child, then a problem could be missed,” she says. In addition, you need to assess how far away the child is from reaching the milestone. The cut-off age for walking is 18 months; however, a child who is cruising at this age and meeting all his other developmental milestones is quite possibly fine.”

A paediatrician needs to evaluate whether the missed milestone is a problem in the bigger picture, and also whether the delay is due to an underlying physiological reason.

Even an allergy or an iron deficiency could keep a child awake at night, cause her to underperform or miss her milestones.

dealing with delayed milestones Nikki McMahon works as a freelance web developer in Gauteng and has three children, aged nine, five and three. Her youngest, Juno, has spina bifida and sacral agenesis, a rare congenital condition in which there is abnormal foetal development of the lower spine.

As a result, most of her physical milestones are delayed and there are also cognitive and speech delays, although these may not be due to the underlying condition. On the basis of assessments, Juno is about one year delayed cognitively, particularly her expressive speech.

“Some days she’ll have conversations that make us think she’s come so far, and then other days we’ll despair and wonder if those ‘wow days’ ever really happened,” says Nikki.

Jenny Perkel, a clinical psychologist in private practice in Cape Town, explains that because of the competitive nature of many schools and society, developmental delays are challenging for many parents. However, bear in mind that children are “astute and aware of people’s reactions” and any kind of embarrassment or disapproval is likely to be picked up by them. Perkel acknowledges that it’s difficult for parents to hide their true feelings and that they should rather “get in touch with how they feel through seeing a professional and making some kind of peace with the situation”.

Nikki says that making comparisons, particularly of children the same age as Juno, is problematic. “In order to move forward I have learnt not to do this, because it has a negative impact on my daughter and the rest of the family,” she says. “I make a conscious effort to treat Juno as an individual, growing and learning at her own pace – although I still fail at this regularly.” One of the most helpful things Nikki has done is to form friendships with other moms who are going through similar experiences.

Clearly, assessing milestones in young children is important, primarily to pick up delays and their causes. Next time a parent sidles up to you to brag about her child’s advanced development, know that very little is predictable in the long course of a lifetime.

developmental traits that should concern you Talk to your doctor if your child does the following at three years old: • has unclear speech or drooling; • has difficulty working simple toys, for example turning handles or simple peg boards; • doesn’t use sentences or understand simple instructions; • no pretending or make-believe play; • has no interest in playing with other children or toys; • doesn’t make eye contact and • has lost skills once possessed.

• doesn’t use “me” and “you” correctly; • is unclear in speech and • has lost skills once possessed.

At five years old: • no wide range of emotions; • exhibits extreme behaviour such as being unusually fearful, aggressive, shy or sad; • c an’t focus on an activity for more than five minutes and is very easily distracted; • responds to people superficially or

At four years old: • unable to jump in place; • has difficulty scribbling; • shows lack of interest in interactive games or make-believe; • ignores other children and shows no response to people outside the family; • shows resistance when it comes to dressing, sleeping and using the toilet; • unable to retell a favourite story; • u nable to follow a command of three parts; • can’t understand the terms “same” and “different”.

not at all; • can’t differentiate the real from the made-up; • doesn’t engage in a variety of games and activities; • unable to give first and last names; • plurals and past tense are not used correctly; • d oesn’t

talk

about

everyday

activities and experiences; • doesn’t draw pictures; • unable to brush teeth, wash and dry hands, or get undressed without help and • has lost skills once possessed.

Source: Centers for Disease Control and Prevention

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June 2014

25

parenting

the boomerang child Young adults who leave home only to move back in again are not necessarily aimless or failing at life. GARY KOEN

a

helps us understand the likely scenario.

“boomerang child” can be described as a young adult who appears incapable of being able to leave home or who moves out and then suddenly returns home and moves back in again. But I find the term somewhat incongruous. A boomerang is supposed to return to the thrower. Also, a boomerang in full flight is a beautiful sight – it is dynamic and graceful, yet filled with a primitive raw power, a reminder of the weapon it once was. When people talk about a “boomerang child”, the connotations are often negative. They are implying inertia, helplessness, an absence of confidence or direction, and an entitled sense of needing to be looked after.

Parents need to distinguish, however, between the normal ebb and flow of a young person’s passage from dependency towards independence, and a young adult who has literally ground to a halt in their life. The process of separating from our parents as young adults doesn’t happen overnight. The final road from bustling, busy adolescent towards fully fledged self-sufficiency is a developmental stage of its own, which can last as long as 10 years – more than twice as long as high school. Anyone who is “thrown” into the world like a boomerang the moment they matriculate will invariably find themselves, one way or another, spending the rest of their lives looking for a home to come back to.

The final road from bustling, busy adolescent towards fully fledged self-sufficiency is a developmental stage of its own, which can last as long as 10 years.

Young people are still in the adolescent stage of life, even in their late teenage years. The whole of adolescence is fundamentally about a child’s movement from a state of relative dependency towards a state of independence; from being relatively little to becoming relatively big. By the time they matriculate they are closer to being little than big. Young adults still need parental guidance, especially when faced with complex life decisions that can carry long-term implications. Going to university, finding a job, getting married and starting a family is not as simple as it sounds, although those of us who want this for our lives naturally want to get it right.

It’s not unusual at all for teenagers to not know what they want to do when they leave school. There is a hidden danger in the expectation that somehow they should know what they want to do, and that not knowing means they are going to make a mess of their lives.

Parents need to realise that not knowing is not the problem. It’s when they either doubt or lack the ability to find out what they want to do that problems start.

Often at this stage many teenagers will fall into the trap of saying the right thing simply in order to keep their parents happy or to get them off their backs. The tendency to be seen to be behaving in a sensible and acceptable way often hides a deep-rooted uncertainty.

They end up making decisions and choices that they don’t really feel comfortable with, set standards for themselves that are impossible to meet and end up falling into a failure trap that can last for years.

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PHOTOGRAPH: shutterstock.com

on the cusp

The main task of parents at this stage is to accept their child’s anxiety of “not knowing” and use it to motivate them to start finding out what they want to do. In the long run, going through the slog and discomfort of not knowing is far preferable to simply paying lip service and making half-hearted choices.

knowing who we are If we are to avoid the aimlessness that can beset many a young adult’s life, close attention needs to be paid to what takes place during adolescence. It’s an incredibly rich developmental stage, central to which is the relationship being forged between parent and child, and the relationship they are going to have with themselves. Adolescence is the time when they start to get to know who they really are.

By the time they have reached the age of 18 or 19, we can reasonably expect young people to have some idea of their likes and dislikes – the clothes they like to wear, the food they enjoy, their choice of friends and the company they keep. Basically, they need to know what it is they enjoy doing. This is different from knowing what it is they are good at. The ideal is to be good at something and to enjoy doing it.

Young adults of this age should also have acquired some insight into their decisionmaking process: how they make life choices, take responsibility for their actions and tackle difficult tasks. They should now be able to discriminate between a good effort and a poor effort, and have developed some appreciation of quality.

They should also have developed an appreciation for the importance of being able to think for themselves and to realise that what they do is a reflection of who they are.

These are the issues that parents need to begin talking to their children about long before they become young adults. As I have pointed out, it’s not simply a given that they will know what they want to do with their lives by the time they leave school. However, they should be equipped with the tools to find out.

It’s really okay to have a “boomerang child”, provided the trajectory of their life has as its ultimate goal a richer understanding of themselves. What we need to be concerned about is the boomerang that lies uselessly on the ground.

about the author Gary Koen is a clinical psychologist in private practice with over 20 years’ experience, working mainly with adults and adolescents. He also does presentations at schools on a range of teenage-related topics. These include all the general aspects of normal adolescent development. He developed, and successfully runs a course, “An introduction to adolescence”, aimed at parents. He is also working on a book that deals with the challenges facing parents and teenagers and, as a father of three, he is heavily invested in everything he says. For more information, visit garykoen.co.za

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resource

a club for everyone Not sure how to keep the children busy over the long school break? Simone Jeffery

academic

Sci-Bono Discovery Centre The centre

Science workshops

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introduces children to science through interactive, hands-on workshops and exhibits. Each holiday programme follows a different theme with related workshops and science shows. Parents can drop their children off and collect them later in the day or sit at the coffee shop while their children are busy. Please note that the centre doesn’t look after the children all the time. Pack a snack and something to drink.

Workshops are suitable for children 6 years and older.

Date: Groovy Green Globe: 28 June–20 July, Space Invaders: 4–12 October, The

Gadget Factory: 11–31 December. Time: 9am–5pm Monday–Friday, 9:30am– 4:30pm Saturday and Sunday. Venue: Sci-Bono Discovery Centre, cnr Miriam Makeba St and President St, Newtown.

Cost: adults R35, pensioners, students and children 3–16 years old R20; workshop costs vary. Contact: 011 639 8400 or visit sci-bono.co.za

animal interaction

Chikara Pony Camps Children should wear sunscreen, long pants, heeled shoes (school shoes), and bring a swimming costume and towel in summer. They provide lunch and juice for the day campers, and

Horse riding and pony camps

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PHOTOGRAPHS: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM

compiled a list of holiday activities for all ages, talents and interests.

Lory Park Animal and Owl Sanctuary

all meals and snacks during the three-day camps. One-day camps take place once a month. They also hold three-day camps during the government and independent school holidays and they can arrange camps on request (minimum four children).

Suitable for children 5–17 years old.

Time: one-day camp 9am–5pm, three-day camps 9am on the first day to 3pm on the last day. Venue: Chikara Stables, 202 Java Rd, Nooitgedacht. Cost: one-day camp R300, three-day camp R750. Contact: lynn@chikara.co.za or visit chikara.co.za

Chartwell Stables Children should wear long pants and heeled shoes for these three-day camps. They provide riding hats.

Each day includes two craft activities and two chances to ride. They also play games and sing songs around a bonfire during the evening. They provide breakfast, lunch and dinner. The camp is suitable for children 6–14 years old.

Date: tbc. Time: arrive between 6:30am– 8am (breakfast is at 8am), children who aren’t sleeping over can stay for the evening activities, which ends at 8pm, Tuesday– Thursday during all school holidays. Venue: Chartwell Stables, 112 Runnymead St, Chartwell. Cost: day camp R400, threeday camp R1 000. Contact: 083 500 0103, cstables@netactive.co.za or visit chartwellstables.co.za

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Zoo activities and animal interaction

Joburg Zoo A varied, outdoor programme with activities such as animal feeding, enrichment activities, crafts and games.

Children under 7 are taken on a guided ferry tour of the zoo and need to be accompanied by an adult. Children should bring their own lunch. Suitable for children up to 13 years old.

Date: 30 June, 1–4 and 7–11 July, 11–15 and 25–29 August, 8–12 and 17–19 December. Time: 9am–1pm for 7–13 year olds, 10am–12pm for under 7 year olds during government and independent school holidays. Venue: Jan Smuts Ave, Parkview. Cost: from R75. Contact: 011 646 2000 or visit jhbzoo.org.za

Children learn about animals while they explore the zoo and help out as a ranger for the day. They work with their hands, learn about conservation and develop a respect for animals. They help with the cleaning and preparing of food and enrichment for the animals, as well as listen to conservation talks and take part in projects. Children need to wear old, comfortable clothes, and closed shoes. They provide a light lunch.

Suitable for children 6–16 years old.

Times: 8am–4pm Tuesday–Thursday during all school holidays. Venue: Lory Park, 180/1 Kruger Rd, President Park, Midrand. Cost: R160 per child. Contact: 011 315 7307, education@lorypark.co.za or visit lorypark.co.za

Montecasino Bird Gardens They offer interactive, animal-related activities filled with interesting facts and creative projects.

Children should bring a packed lunch, and wear sunscreen and a hat. They provide a juice box and a packet of crisps. Suitable for children 6–11 years old. They cater to children with special needs.

Date: 30 June–4 July, 8–19 December (closed 16 December). Time: 8:30am–2:30pm Monday–Friday when the independent and government school holidays overlap. Venue: Montecasino Bird Gardens, cnr Witkoppen Rd and William Nicol Dr, Fourways. Cost:

R120 per day. Contact: 011 511 1864 or visit montecasino.co.za

Shepherd’s Fold Stables Spend a week on a real horse farm for riding lessons, trail rides, games on horses, swimming in the dam, treasure hunts and more.

Campers get lunch and snacks and those sleeping over get three meals a day and snacks. Suitable for children 6–16 years old. Children 8 years and older can choose to sleep over.

Date: 30 June–4 July, 14–18 July, 11–14 and 25–27 August, 1–2 September, 6–10 October, 3–5 December, 8–12 December (subject to change); 15–17 December, 7–9 January 2015 (subject to change). Time: 8am–5pm, daily during all school holidays. Venue: Shepherd’s Fold Stables, 55 Sunset Dr, Elandsdrift, Lanseria. Cost: R300 per day, R50 extra per night to sleep over. Contact: 084 220 2657 or belinda.milsom@gmail.com

art and crafts

Artjamming They offer a creative and safe environment for budding artists to master painting. Each day follows a different theme: graffiti, Andy Warhol (pop art), comic books or Jackson Pollock. They supply you with a plastic apron. Parents can drop the children off and collect them later, but children are not allowed to

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resource

resource and a swimming costume and towel in summer. They provide a cooked meal and fruit. Suitable for children 5–10 years old. Children need to be competent with scissors.

Date: 30 June–4 July. Time: 8am–4pm, during selected weeks in the independent school holidays, and in the government school holidays by bookings only for a minimum of 6 children. Subject to availability. Venue: 1/62 Pine Rd, Kyalami A/H. Cost: R950 per child for the week.

Contact: 072 193 3652, housewife@live. co.za or visit thehideoutkyalami.co.za

cooking

Art and crafts at Seedpod

leave the store. Classes generally take place during the first week of the school holidays (government and independent), but may be extended depending on demand. You are advised to call ahead to book. Suitable for children 6 years old and older. Children under 6 years are welcome, but need adult supervision.

Time: varies per store. Venues: Lonehill Centre, Lonehill Boulevard, Fourways; or shop 27, Melrose Arch Piazza (next to Woolworths), Melrose. Cost: R155 per class, includes 10x14 or 12x12 canvas, brushes and paint. Contact: Lonehill: 011 465 5778, lonehill@artjamming.co.za; Melrose Arch: 011 684 1608, melrose@ artjamming.co.za, or visit artjamming.co.za

Rock Paper Scissors Each morning has a unique theme. Children do two craft activities and take part in organised games and free play. They warn it can get messy.

Children still in nappies and/or under 3 years old need to be supervised. They provide snacks and refreshments. Suitable for children 2–10 years old.

Time: 9am–1pm Monday–Friday during the government school holidays.

Venue: cnr Susman Ave and Morell Rd, Blairgowrie. Cost: R165 per day, second child less 15% (includes all materials).

Contact: 084 693 2160 or visit Facebook /RockPaperScissorsPlay

Seedpod They offer a week of creative fun in which children can try their hand at decoupage, painting, clay work, ceramic painting, mosaics, dry brushing, beading or sewing. They advise that children don’t wear new clothes. They provide juice and snacks. Suitable for children 6 years and older.

Time: 9am–12pm Monday–Friday during the government and independent school holidays (dates to be confirmed). Venues: 13 4th Ave, Parkhurst or Broadacres Garden Centre, Cedar Rd, Broadacres.

Cost: R220 per morning. Contact: Broadacres: 011 465 0375, info@ seedpodstudio.co.za, Parkhurst: 011 447 0006, parkhurst@seedpodstudio.co.za or visit seedpodstudio.co.za

Cooking Up A Storm They conduct a cooking and art combo programme that keeps children busy with two sweet and two savoury recipes, and a sandart activity.

Children should bring their own packed lunch and something to drink. Suitable for children 6–12 years old.

Date: 28 June; 4, 5, 18 and 19 July; dates for the rest of the year to be confirmed.

You need to book one month in advance.

Time: 10am–2pm, during the independent and government school holidays. Venue: Robindale, Randburg. Cost: R250 per child, includes a cooking session as well as a sandart activity. Contact: 083 408 8802, jeanri@cookingupastorm.co.za or visit cookingupastorm.co.za Little Cooks Club Educational and handson cooking programmes in two age groups that introduce children to basic cooking techniques and new food, and teaches them about kitchen hygiene and nutrition.

Suitable for children 2–6 and 7–12 years old.

Date and Time: varies per branch.

Venue: across Gauteng. Cost: varies.

For your closest franchise contact: headoffice@littlecooksclub.co.za or visit littlecooksclub.co.za

Tots n Pots Helderkruin Fun handson cooking lessons. They provide snacks and juice, as well as tea and coffee for parents. Every month they hold a Cupcake Saturday, where children bake and ice a giant cupcake. Suitable for children 3–12 years old.

Date: 30 June, 2, 4, 7, 9 and 11 July (take a blanket to be donated to Baby Moses in Helderkruin); Halloween workshop: 25

The Hide Out Children bake, cook, create crafts, ride bicycles and enjoy organised and experiential play. Children should bring a change of clothing, their bicycles,

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Cooking holiday programmes

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October; Christmas workshop: 8, 10 and 12 December. Dates for Cupcake Saturday to be confirmed. Time: 10am–11:30am.

Venue: shop 10, Kruin Centre, Banket Dr, Helderkruin, Roodepoort. Cost: R150– R200 per child, per workshop; R850 per term; Cupcake Saturday: R120 per child, includes juice, tea and coffee for parents. Contact: 082 389 1564, daleen@ totsnpots.com or visit totsnpots.com

multiple activities

Domestic Bliss They hold cooking, first aid and ranger day programmes throughout the year. They provide a cold drink and snacks. Suitable for children 7–13 years old.

Time: first aid and junior ranger programmes: 8am–2pm; cooking programmes: 9am– 12:30pm during the government and independent school holidays in June, July, August and December. Venue: Domestic Bliss, 235 Jan Smuts Ave, Parktown North.

Cost: first aid R275, junior ranger R295, cooking R320 per session. Contact: 011 447 5517, 083 525 4992, db@domesticbliss. co.za or visit domesticbliss.co.za

Serendipity Holiday activities include baking, art and crafts, story time, organised games and free play. They provide the children with lunch and a snack. Suitable for children 3–9 years old.

Time: half day: 8:30am–12:30pm, full day: 8:30am–4:30pm, Tuesday–Friday during government and independent school holidays. Venue: 48 Keyes Ave, Rosebank.

Cost: half day R150, full day R240.

Contact: 011 447 7386, serendipityplay@ gmail.com or visit serendipityplay.co.za

nature

Cashane Junior Rangers survival camp Children can learn how to make fire using only a flint, find food and water, build shelters, make bows and arrows, make string from plants, learn to fish and more. There are three different levels, each presenting a new set of survival challenges.

Parents don’t need to supervise, but they are welcome to join. They provide meals for the duration of the camp. Suitable for children 6–18 years old.

Date: level 1: 27–29 June, 4–6 and 18–20 July, 5–7 September, 3–5 October; level 2: 8–10 August. Time: 4pm Friday– 3pm Sunday. Venue: Kareekloof Farm, Lanseria. Cost: level 1 R750 per person, level 2 and 3 R850 per person.

Contact: 076 429 6739, cashanerangers@ gmail.com or visit key2comms.wix.com/ cashane-rangers

In The Forest holiday camp A day camp that gets children involved in a structured outdoor programme that includes muddy obstacle courses, wacky relay races, team challenges, giant camp games, art and crafts, swimming, hikes and more. They provide breakfast and lunch, as well as snacks between meals.

Suitable for children 6–13 years old. They cater to children with special needs.

Date: holiday camps: 30 June–4 July; 7–11 and 14–18 July; 11–15 and 25–29 August; 29 September– magazine joburg

Survival camps with Cashane Junior Rangers

3 October; 6–10 October; 8–12 and 15–19 December. Weekend camps 13–15 June (family camp); 1–3 August (dads and lads camp); 5–7 September (weekend camp); 31 October–2 November (weekend camp).

Time: 7am–6pm Monday–Friday during all school holidays; weekend camps: 3:30pm Friday–8:30am Sunday. Venue: on the R82/ Old Vereeniging Rd, Eikenhof. Transport from Sharondale Nursery in Brackenhurst is available. Cost: holiday camps R195 per day; R975 per week; siblings R175 per day; R875 per week; sleepover R90 per child; transport R65 per child, per day; weekend camps R350–R425. Contact: 076 575 8003 or Kyle: 076 035 4038, info@intheforest. co.za or visit intheforest.co.za

Kidz Fishing Camp Children learn what it takes to become a real fisherman during a three-day camp on the banks of the Vaal River. Other activities include table tennis, board games, educational movies, a pool table, camp fires and canoeing. They also offer family weekends if parents want to attend with their children. They provide three meals a day. Suitable for children 7–15 years old.

Date: 1–3 and 14–16 July; 12–14 and 19–21 August; 2–4 September; 7–9 October; December dates to be confirmed.

Venue: Villa Nova, Vaal River. Children are collected and dropped off in Bedfordview.

Cost: R980. Contact: 083 610 2911, nella.villanova@kidzfishingcamp.co.za or visit kidzfishingcamp.co.za Sundowner Adventures They offer a 2,5 hour introductory fly-fishing clinic, which covers all the basics. Parents are encouraged to join in the clinic. Fly-fishing helps with coordination skills and is an excellent way for children with special needs to develop mentally in a tranquil environment. Suitable for children 6 years and older.

Time: 9am–11:30am Tuesday–Sunday throughout the year. Venues: Wednesday, Friday and Sunday: Magalies Barbus Haven, Magaliesburg; Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday: Kloofzicht Lodge, Kromdraai Rd, R374, Muldersdrift. Cost: adults R350, children R250, excluding equipment hire.

Contact: 011 315 4503, 083 414 0391, sundowncorporate@gmail.com or visit sundowneradventures.co.za June 2014

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Wild Kids holiday programme An

during selected days in the government school holidays. Venues: Barnyard Theatres in Boksburg and Rivonia (varies each holiday). Cost: R430 for the two days.

Contact: 083 609 9679, dramadynamics@ gmail.com or visit dramadynamics.co.za

outdoor programme that gets children to exercise their motor skills and tactile perception, while creating crafts and enjoying structured physical activities.

Children should wear sunscreen, a hat, clothes that may get dirty, and take a water bottle. They provide a theme-related healthy snack. Suitable for children 3–9 years old.

Time: 9am–12pm on selected days during the independent school holidays. Venue: Sandton Field and Study Centre, Louise Ave, Parkmore. Cost: R250 per day, includes all materials. Contact: 082 379 2675, 083 457 4106 or visit wild-kids.co.za

National

performance

Buzz Courses are designed to build confidence, boost social and communication skills, and grow concentration and coordination. They are packed with interactive games and character play.

Themed courses include Minion Madness (Despicable Me) in the June holidays. The course is led by trained Buzz workshop leaders and culminates in a show for family and friends on the final day. Suitable for children 5–9 years old.

Date: 30 June–3 July; December holiday dates to be confirmed. Time: 10am–12pm at Dance Junxion; 2pm–4pm at Norscot Manor during most school holidays.

Venues: Dance Junxion, Mall of Rosebank; and Norscot Manor Recreation Centre,

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Interactive games at Buzz

Fourways. Cost: R800, R600 per sibling.

Contact: 011 025 2525 or visit buzzdrama. com/holiday-courses

Drama Dynamics Film and stage acting workshops that get children involved in comic skits, characterisation, miming, improvisation games and more.

Children should wear comfortable clothes (no dresses or skirts), take one object/ prop and a hat, and take a packed lunch and a drink. Suitable for children 8–18 years old.

Date: tentatively 1–18 July, 6–10 October, and 11–12 December. Time: 9am–3pm

Children’s Theatre A theatrical programme for children where they learn songs and scenes from some of the great musicals of the Broadway stage.

Children must wear comfortable clothing and running shoes. They provide a light lunch, juice and biscuits during the break.

Suitable for children 7–17 years old.

Date: 30 June–4 July, 11–15 August, November/December to be confirmed.

Time: 9am–1:30pm, Monday–Friday during the government and independent school holidays. Venue: 3 Junction Ave, Parktown. Cost: approximately R1 000 per child for the week. Contact: 011 484 1584, cindy@nctt.org.za or visit nationalchildrenstheatre.org.za

children 4–12 years old (younger and older by special arrangement).

Time: 8:30am–12pm, selected weeks in most school holidays. Venues: at studios in Kyalami, Fourways or Floracliff. Cost: approximately R800 for the week. Contact: 079 497 2680, lindy@xstaticdance.co.za or visit xstaticdance.co.za

sleepovers

FlipFlop Gymnastics Holiday Camp A three-day camp that gets children to take part in treasure hunts and nature walks, baking activities, campfire tales and more. Space is limited. They provide all meals as well as snacks throughout the day. For children 3–13 years old.

Xstatic Dance A high energy dance programme that looks into various dance styles: hip-hop, disco, freestyle, breakdancing, Irish, ballet, modern, line dancing and more. Children work towards a concert that they perform at the end of the week. Children should wear comfortable clothing and bring their own snacks and refreshments. Suitable for

Outdoor adventures at Happy Acres

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Date: 1–4 July, 7–10 October and 11–14 December. Time: departs and returns at approximately 3pm. Venue: Hartbeespoort Holiday Resort, departs from Sixteen10 Restaurant, Edenvale. Cost: R1 900, includes meals and accommodation.

Contact: 072 238 7342, tanya@flipflopgym. co.za or visit flipflopgym.co.za

Happy Acres holiday camp A nature camp for adventurous boys and girls. The children are split up into groups of 10 to 12 with a dedicated counsellor to look after them throughout their stay. The counsellors provide stimulating activities that cater to the various age groups and ability levels.

Activities include art, crafts, walks, games, swimming, cook-outs, crab catching, playing with the guinea pigs or rabbits, and more. Suitable for children 7–14 years old.

Date: 28 June–5 July, 5–12 July, 6–13 and 13–20 December. Venue: Magaliesburg, children can take the camp’s bus that departs from the Joburg Zoo. Cost: R1 260, transport R260. Contact: 083 449 5123, hacres@iafrica.com or visit happyacres.co.za

Kidscape Adventure Camps An adventure camp that takes place over four nights and five days. There are group leaders and adults who look after the children at all times. There are three mealtimes a day.

They cater to vegetarians and provide

magazine joburg

halaal-friendly meals by prior arrangement.

Suitable for children 7–14 years old.

Date: to be confirmed in the June/July holidays and in December. Venue: Camp Nelu, Hekpoort. Children can take the camp bus from Delta Environmental Centre, Victory Park. Cost: R1 500 including transport. Contact: 083 457 7848, graeme@kidscapeadventures.com or visit kidscapeadventures.com

sports and fitness

Ace Tennis Children need to wear comfortable clothing, tennis shoes, hats and sunscreen. If you don’t have your own racquets, they can provide these as well as all other equipment. The 2–6 year olds have a dedicated coach. Children should bring a water/juice bottle and a snack.

Suitable for children 2–16 years old.

Date: 11–15 August and either 8–12 or 15–19 December. Time: 9am–1pm, during the independent school holidays. Venue: Parkhurst Tennis Club, 12th St, cnr 5th Ave, Parkhurst.

Cost: R800 for all 5 mornings, R180 per day. Contact: 083 271 3804 or annchapman@telkomsa.net

Cricket School of Excellence Children should wear running shoes, comfortable clothes, a hat and sunscreen. If possible, bring a cricket bat, but if not, they do have equipment that you can use. Children

Tennis coaching at Ace Tennis

should also bring their own lunch and a bottle of water/juice. Suitable for boys and girls 4–13 years old.

Time: 9am–2pm, during the government school holidays. Venue: University of Johannesburg. Cost: R600 per child.

Contact: 0861 123 273, 084 249 9969, william@cricketschool.co.za or visit cricketschool.co.za

ITA Tennis Clinic A fun tennis clinic with small classes to ensure individual attention.

Indoor events held at both venues in the event of rain. Children should wear casual clothes, a hat, tennis shoes with socks, and sunscreen. Your own racquet is preferable, but you can borrow or purchase

one from the coach. Children should take a water bottle/drink and snacks. Suitable for children 3–14 years old.

Date: Craighall: 30 June–4 July, 11–15 and 25–29 August; 1–5 September; 8–12 December. Lonehill: 14–18 and 21–25 July; 6–10 October; 11, 12 and 15 December. Time: mini tennis 3–6 year olds: 8:30am–9:30am, half day 6–16 year olds: 9:30am–1:30pm, intermediate 11–16 year olds: 11:30am–1:30pm, during government and independent school holidays. Venues: Lonehill Crawford Preparatory School, Sceales Rd, Lonehill or Craighall Park Tennis Club, St Alban’s Rd, off Jan Smuts Ave, near Hyde Park. Cost: mini tennis 3–6 year olds: R260 per five-day clinic, R80 per day. Halfday clinic 6–16 year olds: R800 per five-day clinic, R200 per day. Intermediate 11–16 year olds: R500 per five-day clinic, R120 per day. Contact: 083 443 3391, info@itatennis. co.za or visit itatennis.co.za

Club-V Kids Club The programme includes art and crafts, paint–jamming, basketball, bean bag or Hula Hoop challenges, soccer shoot-outs and a yoga movement class. For 3–13 year olds.

Date: June/July dates, meals and information for special needs children, tbc.

Time: 9am–12pm. Venue: Virgin Active Health Clubs countrywide. Cost: free for Club–V members. Contact: 0860 200 911 or visit virginactive.co.za

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books

a good read for toddlers

for preschoolers

Up and Down

By Oliver Jeffers (Published by Harper Collins Publishers, R139) In this sequel to the internationally best-selling picture book Lost and Found, we revisit the boy and the penguin after their trip to the South Pole. The boy and the penguin still enjoy spending all their time together; that is, until the penguin starts to dream of flying, ignoring the boy’s advice that it’s impossible. Running away, the penguin searches for a chance to get his feet off the ground. But will flying be everything he had hoped for? And is the boy missing him as much as he is missing the boy? This is a heart-warming story for children between the ages of three and five years old about friendship, love and reaching for your dreams.

Can’t You Sleep Little Bear?

By Martin Waddell and Barbara Firth

timeless classic

(Published by Walker Books, R82) Little Bear can’t sleep. He’s frightened of the dark, even with the biggest lantern of them all at his bedside. But Big Bear finds an ingenious way to reassure him… When it was first published in 1988, Can’t You Sleep Little Bear? quickly became a classic bedtime favourite. A timeless and universal bestseller for children from the age of three to seven, it has won multiple awards, has been translated into 25 languages and has sold over seven million copies.

Waddell is widely acknowledged as one of the greatest writers of children’s books.

Firth has contributed to over 30 picture books, including The Park in the Dark.

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Join the Zoo Hullabaloo!

By Jan Ormerod and Lindsey Gardiner (Published by Oxford University Press, R78) This is a follow-up to the picture book Doing the Animal Bop – a second riotous animal romp that will have toddlers stamping their feet and joining in with gusto. The energetic rhyming text encourages children to make animal movements and noises as they join lions and lambs, meerkats and ponies, peacocks and koalas. The cheerful collage artwork from Gardiner and infectiously happy text from Ormerod, won’t fail to raise a smile. This is a book that will be equally satisfying to share on a one-on-one basis, as it will be to use in a rhyme-time or nursery setting.

Little Rosy Lost her Way...

By Kasthurie Govender (Published by Xlibris, R115) Suddenly little Rosy heard a whistle, then the sound of a moving train and realised that she was not with her mommy; she immediately turned around and ran back to the platform. It was too late; the train was already moving out of the station at a great speed, and her mom was on that train… What happened to Rosy? Luckily a circus elephant called Ganesh took pity on the little girl. In this delightful story, children learn about kindness, but most of all, that it is almost always better, and safer, to listen to your mother when she tells you to “stay close”. To order a copy of this book, email kasthurie@creativeartwork.co.za

magazine joburg

for preschoolers set the stage

Joy Kids: Bible Stories about Friendship, the Good and Beautiful Jesus, God’s Miracles, People Trusting God and Bible Kids Celebrating Jesus

By Ewald van Rensburg and Lilani Brits (Published by Christian Media Publishing, R20 each, R95) The books tackle friendship, Jesus’s good deeds, miracles and trust. The colourfully illustrated Joy! Kids Bible has been compiled with young children’s developmental phases and unique temperament in mind.

It helps with faith building, vocabulary, as well as reading skills and emotional development. It includes guidelines for parents, explaining the different icons that accompany each story, which can be used to interact with the story depending on your child’s age.

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The Gruffalo Play

By Julia Donaldson and Axel Scheffler (Published by Macmillan Children’s Books, R81) The Gruffalo story has been adapted into a fun and accessible play script, ideal for children to use as a school play or at home. The book has been designed with rehearsals and a performance in mind. Colour coding for each character helps children to follow their lines and join the action.

The book also contains a tips section, which includes helpful advice on staging the play and performing it with larger groups. There are ideas for themed make-and-do Gruffalo activities and the lyrics and music for the Gruffalo Song.

for early graders Guinea Pigs Online: Viking Victory

By Jennifer Gray and Amanda Swift (Published by Quercus, R86) A nasty builder with a huge digger is threatening the guinea pigs’ woodland, and the furry pals must protect it. But how? Terry wants to tell all his friends online, and hopes a blog will bring all the guinea pigs together to stand up to the new enemy. Eduardo thinks a protest song will do the trick. He comes up with a new composition within minutes: “Guinea pigs of the world unite! Against the baddies we will fight. Let’s stop the houses, save the copse, bite the builder, rip his socks!”

Meanwhile poor Coco just wants everyone to get on with it. Then they meet Olaf the Viking guinea pig, who claims to be over 1 000 years old. Can they use his ancient tactics to help fight the builder?

Brave Dog Bonnie and Bright Dog Bonnie

By Bel Mooney (Published by Walker Books, R96 each) In Brave Dog Bonnie, Harry wants to visit his dad, but he refuses to go without Bonnie.

Harry’s dad lives in London now and he has invited Harry over. Harry can’t go without Bonnie, because who else will help him when he sees Dad’s new life in the big city? But Bonnie is about to have an adventure of her own, showing everybody that you don’t have to be big to be brave. In the sixth and final adventure for children from the age of seven, Zena suggests a school dance, but if there are two things Harry hates, it’s dancing with girls and watching his mom giggle with her new boyfriend. As his birthday party looms, Harry starts to wonder if his new family will ever get on.

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books

for early graders

Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing

By Judy Blume

Super Sister and the Birthday Party

By Gwyneth Rees

fudge is back

(Published by Macmillan Children’s Books, R94) The first book published in Judy Blume’s hugely successful and hilarious fiction series about a naughty little boy called Fudge, has received new cover art from picture book star Emily Gravett (Little Mouse’s Big Book of Fears and The Odd Egg). Peter thinks he has the world’s biggest problem – his little brother, Fudge.

Fudge causes trouble wherever he goes and it’s usually up to Peter to sort out the mess. When Peter wins a tiny green turtle called Dribble, he is determined to keep it away from his brother, but when Fudge does get his hands on Dribble, disaster strikes. The other books in the series also received a makeover, and it’s worth investing in them: Double Fudge, Superfudge, Fudge-A-Mania and Otherwise Known as Sheila the Great.

(Published by Macmillan Children’s Books, R94) Saffie isn’t your average naughty little sister – she’s got superpowers. This is the second book in this magical series for children from the age of seven from bestselling author Gwyneth Rees.

Emma and Saffie are going to stay with their grandparents for the summer to learn how to use their superpowers. Grandma has powers too, but Grandpa doesn’t, and he definitely doesn’t like the gnomes doing the gardening, or the washing-up doing itself. He’d rather play with his model aeroplanes. As the summer passes, the girls are having lots of fun. Emma brings a whole doll’s house to life, but all Saffie wants is to cheer up Grandpa, so she decides to throw him the best party ever. What could possibly go wrong?

for preteens and teens

A.N.T.I.D.O.T.E

By Malorie Blackman

Monday Evening, Thursday Afternoon

By Jenny Robson (Published by NB Publishers, R127) The story is set in the fictional town of Gap Falls, where two young girls, Louise van Rensburg and Faheema Majiet, have become best friends despite their very different backgrounds. But cataclysmic events far beyond South Africa’s borders (bombings on the London Underground and an insensitive cartoon portrayal of the prophet Mohammed) serve to drive a wedge between them. When their respective families prohibit their friendship, they realise it is up to them to find a way to restore their relationship and to convince the adults of their deep emotional bond. The book inspires the reader to see similarities and to find common ground.

This novel for children from the age of 12 to 14 was shortlisted for the MacMillan African Writers’ Prize.

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June 2014

(Published by Random House, R113) Elliot wishes his mom was more interesting: everyone else’s parents do exciting things, such as work for the BBC, but his mom is only a secretary. And then on an average Friday night, the police show up. His mom’s been caught on CCTV breaking into a giant chemical company. They say she’s working undercover for A.N.T.I.D.O.T.E, a group against animal testing, but how is that possible? She’s not a spy. Or is she?

Now she’s on the run, and only he can uncover the truth. And he’s got to crack a code to do it. This is a gripping story for children between nine and 11 years old from the bestselling author of Noughts and Crosses. In 2008, Malorie Blackman was honoured with an OBE for her services to Children’s Literature. She is the current Waterstones Children’s Laureate for 20132015 in the UK.

Stay Where You Are & Then Leave

By John Boyne

The Red Pyramid

By Rick Riordan (Published by Hyperion Books, R165) This graphic novel for children aged 10 to 13 is the first book in the Kane Chronicles series. Carter and Sadie Kane’s dad is a brilliant Egyptologist with a secret plan that goes horribly wrong. An explosion shatters the ancient Rosetta Stone and unleashes Set, the evil god of chaos. Unfortunately the pharaohs of ancient Egypt are far from dead and buried, and so, unfortunately, are their gods. Set imprisons Dr Kane in a gold coffin, and Carter and Sadie have to run for their lives. To save their dad, they must embark on a terrifying quest from Cairo to Paris to the American south-west and discover the truth about their family’s connection to the House of Life, an Egyptian temple of magic that has existed for thousands of years. This is another great teen adventure, with loads of humour, and stunning graphics, where children turn into heroes.

not to b e missed

(Published by Random House, R219) The day the First World War broke out, Alfie Summerfield’s father promised he wouldn’t go away to fight, but he broke that promise the following day. Four years later, Alfie doesn’t know where his father might be, other than that he’s away on a special, secret mission. Then, while shining shoes at King’s Cross Station, Alfie unexpectedly sees his father’s name – in a sheaf of papers belonging to a military doctor. Bewildered and confused, Alfie realises his father is in a hospital close by – a hospital treating soldiers with an unusual condition.

Alfie is determined to rescue his father from this strange, unnerving place. From the author of The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas comes another classic story for children from the age of nine to 11.

magazine joburg

parenting books

Mysmartkid (Distributed by Leisure Books, R295 every two months) This is a play-and-learn programme for children from the age of birth to six years old. Designed by a panel of leading experts, Mysmartkid provides tools for early childhood development to help you give your child the best start in life. Enjoy fun activities with your little one while helping them reach their full potential. Subscribe to Mysmartkid at only R295 per child every two months. A Smartbox jam-packed with age-appropriate toys and tools plus a parent’s guide will be dispatched as soon as your membership has been registered. And as a special welcome offer, your first Smartbox will include two exclusive gifts: a free children’s backpack and a step-by-step guide to the early developmental milestones. Thereafter you will receive a Smartbox every two months. In addition to your Smartbox, you will also receive informative email newsletters compiled by experts in early childhood development. As a member you qualify for extra discounts at mysmartkid.com as well as unique downloads, resources, articles and information tailored to your child’s age and developmental area. The Mysmartkid programme is distributed by Leisure Books.

You can register online at mysmartkid.com, choose your child’s age, and get your ageappropriate activity box delivered free in South Africa every two months.

Mealtimes Made Fun

By Debbie Wareham and Kim Jurgens

the South African way

(Published by Struik Lifestyle, R216) This is a South African cookbook aimed at the family. The authors are aware of how demanding life as a working mom can be and they have tailored recipes that will appeal to babies, toddlers and the rest of the family.

Only locally available ingredients have been used and South African favourites included.

Is That My Child? – Exploding the myths of Dyspraxia, Dyslexia, Tourette’s Syndrome of Childhood, ADD, ADHD and OCD

By Dr Robin Pauc (Published by Virgin Books, R150) At least one child in five experiences some form of learning difficulty, but, according to Pauc, learning difficulties as we understand them do not exist. Pauc writes in this book that they are not diseases, just symptoms, which never appear alone. They are also treatable and avoidable.

Pauc, an expert in child neurology, approaches childhood learning difficulties, including dyslexia, ADD, OCD, ADHD, dyspraxia and Tourette syndrome. magazine joburg

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calendar

what’s on in june

You can also access the calendar online at

childmag.co.za

Your guide for what to do, where to go and who to see.

Compiled by SIMONE JEFFERY

28 sat

special events

39

FUN for children

40

only for parents

42

bump, baby & tot in tow

43

how to help

43

SPECIAL EVENTS

FUN FOR CHILDREN

ONLY FOR PARENTS

bump, baby & tot in tow

how to help

Days of the Dinosaur Walk among moving, roaring, life-size dinosaurs.

A Night With the Stars Elvis Blue performs with the Johannesburg Youth Orchestra.

Baby massage and stimulation class Bond with your baby while learning to stimulate your child’s gross and fine motor skills.

Botshabelo A non-profit organisation that serves the community of Olievenhoutbosch and surrounds.

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PHOTOGRAPHS / ILLUSTRATIONS: shutterstock.com

DStv Kids’ Xtravaganza Children can meet their favourite DStv characters and take part in fabulous activities.

guided talk and enjoy children’s activities.

Space is limited. For families with children 6–12 years old. Time: 12pm–1pm. Venue: Wits Art Museum, cnr Jan Smuts Ave and Jorissen St, Braamfontein. Cost: free. Contact: 011 717 1378 or info.wam@wits.ac.za

SPECIAL EVENTS 1 sunday Checkmate Children think strategically to eliminate their opponent in this fun chess tournament. For 7–13 year olds.

Time: registration 9:30am, tournament 10am–1pm. Venue: Killarney Mall, 60 Riviera Rd, Killarney. Cost: R50. Contact: 061 034 2885 or visit goforchessnow.com Dance with Joburg Ballet Learn a few new steps from a ballet dancer, and get inside tips and advice. All dancers are welcome, regardless of experience. Time: 11:30am–12:15pm. Venue: Killarney Mall, 60 Riviera Rd, Killarney. Cost: free. Contact: 011 646 4657 or visit killarneymall.co.za Gardens of the Golden City This garden has paths with natural stone, water features, cycads, succulents, strelitzias and many other indigenous plants, as well as views of the Magaliesberg range. The home was designed by Herbert Baker in 1904. There is a tea garden too. Time: 10am–5pm.

Venue: Shepstone Gardens, 8 Hope Rd, Mountain View. Cost: R20, children under 12 free. Contact: 082 857 2355, 082 879 8962 or visit gardensofthegoldencity.co.za

6 friday Education Expo Attend this exhibition where you can talk to local school representatives and have all your questions answered. Ends 8 June. Time: 9am–9pm Friday, 8am–7pm Saturday, 9am–5pm Sunday. Venue: The Glen Shopping Centre, cnr Orpen St and Letaba St, Oakdene.

Cost: free. Contact: 061 296 4141 or visit thelearningpoint.co.za Tattoo-a-thon Tattoo studios around the country are raising money for Choc – Childhood Cancer Foundation South Africa. All tattoos are a set size, based on an hour’s work. Book a slot directly with the studio and choose an artist. Choc is a nonprofit organisation that provides holistic support for children suffering from cancer.

Venue: studios across Gauteng. Cost: R700.

Contact: 076 483 3580, tattooathon@ gmail.com or visit tattooathon.co.za

7 saturday Cambridge Food Festival Indulge in comforting gourmet food. Time: 9am–5pm, food demo: tea and macaroon pairing 11am, Fleur du Cap wine and food pairing: 12:30pm. Venue: Mountain Cambridge School, Beethoven St, Melodie, Hartbeespoort. Cost: adults R50, children R25. Contact: 082 496 0388 or visit Facebook /cambridgefoodfestival

15 sun

Father’s Day fishing competition Spend Father’s Day fishing, canoeing, climbing trees and enjoying the fresh air. Time: fishing competition 6am–3pm, family fun day 11am–3pm. Venue: Stornoway Lodge and the Fat Olive Restaurant, Lanseria. Cost: fishing competition R150 per fisherman, R100 per supporting family member, picnics R100 per person. Contact: 082 459 1728, paula@stornoway.co.za or visit stornoway.co.za

Canine cardio Bring your socialised dog (on a leash) for a brisk walk on the Melville Koppies. A reasonable level of fitness is required. No booking required. Time: 8am–9:30am. Venue: 3rd Ave, off Arundel Rd, Westdene. Cost: R25 per person.

Contact: 011 482 4797, fomk@mk.org.za or visit mk.org.za Cooper’s Cave picnic and tour Take a guided tour through a living museum where fossils remain embedded in ancient rock. Prams aren’t recommended unless they are suitable for outdoor/uneven terrain. Booking essential. Time: 9am.

Venue: meet at the Sterkfontein Caves.

Cost: adults R375, children 4–14 years old R150, including a light lunch. Contact: 014 577 9000 or visit maropeng.co.za Hartebeesthoek Radio Astronomy Observatory Take a tour of this working observatory. Booking essential. Time: 4pm–8pm. Venue: HartRAO, R400, Hartebeesthoek. Cost: adults R45, students and pensioners R35, preschool children free, family of four R120. Contact: 012 301 3100, aware@hartrao.ac.za or visit hartrao.ac.za Sasol Bird Fair This year’s fair highlights the need for protecting birds and their habitats as well as various conservation projects.

The theme is “going inland to save our seabirds”. There are numerous lectures and presentations, bird photography workshops, guided walks, as well as entertainment and educational activities for children. Ends 8 June. Time: 7am–3pm. Venue: Walter Sisulu Botanical Gardens, Malcolm Rd, Poortview, Roodepoort. Cost: adults R35, pensioners and students R25, children R12, children under 6 free. Contact Nikki: 083 636 1060, events@birdlife.org.za or visit birdlife.org.za Spruit Day Join in the clean-up efforts along the Braamfontein Spruit. Educational talks on alien vegetation, erosion and pollution, and various competitions between suburbs and schools are held at Delta Park. Time: from 7am. Venue: safe parking at Delta Park Environmental Centre, Sandton Field and Study Centre and Emmarentia Dam. Cost: free. Contact: 082 331 7846 or nataliez@saica.co.za

14 saturday

7 June – Dog walk on Melville Koppies

magazine joburg

World Blood Donor Day The focus for this year’s campaign is “safe blood for saving mothers”. Contact: 0800 119 031 or visit sanbs.org.za

16 monday Walkerville Youth Day walk This 6km walk in a game farm benefits seven local youth charities. There is a supervised play area. For children 5 years and older. Time: 9am–2pm. Venue: Stirrup Glen Horse and Game Farm, Alwynspoort, Walkerville.

Cost: R30. Contact: 072 912 6367 or visit walkervillewalk.co.za Lipizzaners Father’s Day performance The stallions dance to music from James Bond movies. Admire a vehicle display and enjoy a light lunch. Time: 10:30am. Venue: Lipizzaner Centre, 1 Dahlia Rd, Kyalami.

Cost: R150. Book through Computicket: 0861 915 8000 or visit computicket.com Old Mutual Music in the Gardens With AKA, Reason and Tumi. Time: gates open 11am, concert starts 1pm, Kidz Zone: 1:30pm–4:30pm. Venue: Walter Sisulu National Botanical Garden, Poortview, Roodepoort. Cost: R100–R120. Book through Plankton.mobi: 078 665 8241, info@plankton.mobi or visit plankton.mobi

21 saturday Aloe Walk in WSNBG Join specialist horticulturist Andrew Hankey for a walk in the gardens. Booking essential. Time: 9am. Venue: Walter Sisulu National Botanical Garden, Poortview, Roodepoort.

Cost: members: adults R30, children R15, children under 2 free; non-members: adults R60, children R30, children under 2 free. Contact: botsoc@sisulugarden.co.za or visit sanbi.org WAM talkabout Explore the exhibition, Ngezinyawo – Migrant Journeys through a

27 friday Grandparents and special friends assembly The students of Unity College perform lighthearted skits. The college is a special needs school for learners who are mildly to moderately intellectually challenged. Enjoy tea and cake afterwards.

Time: 9am–11am. Venue: 126 Cedar Rd, Witkoppen. Cost: free. Contact: 011 465 2422/3 or visit unity-college.org.za Jozi Night Rider A mountain bike and trail run event incorporating five distances: 3km children’s MTB ride, 10km and 20km MTB ride, and a 5km and 10km trail run. There are bonfires, entertainment and food is on sale. Time: 6pm. Venue: Heia Safari Ranch, 1747 Beyers Naudé Dr, Muldersdrift. Cost: R50–R120. Contact: 012 751 4130, 076 621 1807 or visit asgevents.co.za Open moonlight tour This tour explores the nightlife of the zoo. Take a picnic basket to enjoy around a bonfire. Booking essential. All ages. Time: 5:15pm–8pm.

Venue: Joburg Zoo, Jan Smuts Ave, Parkview. Cost: R95. Contact: 011 646 2000 ext. 216, lebo.moalusi@jhbzoo.org. za or visit jhbzoo.org.za

28 saturday DStv Kids’ Xtravaganza Children can meet DStv characters and take part in activities. Mr Maker and Ben 10 perform four stage shows daily. The Ben 10 show features nifty acrobatic stunts and Mr Maker shows children how to use their imagination. Ben 10: 28 June–1 July, Mr Maker: 2–6 July.

Rock 4 Rhinos This benefit concert features The Straits, key members of Dire Straits, and top local artists. It is in aid of Care for Wild, a rehabilitation centre near Kruger National Park where they care for baby rhinos and other wildlife that have been orphaned or injured by poachers.

Time: gates open 2pm, concert starts 3pm. Venue: SuperSport Park, Centurion. Cost: R380–R650. Book through Webtickets: 0861 225 598 or visit rock4rhinos.org

28 sat

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calendar Festival ends 6 July. For children 4–6 years old. Time: tbc. Venue: Vodaworld, Midrand.

Cost: tbc. Book through Computicket: visit computicket.com Introduction to astronomy Join the resident astronomer for an evening of stargazing, featuring the Butterfly Cluster, The Jewel Box and Omega Centauri among others. Take binoculars. Booking essential.

Time: 5:30pm. Venue: Tumulus Building, Maropeng, Cradle of Humankind. Cost: adults R350, children R165. Contact: 014 577 9000 or visit maropeng.co.za

29 sunday Benoni Art Route Twenty artists have joined together to form an art route that meanders past the lakes of Benoni on the last Sunday of every month. You can download the route from their website.

Time: 10am–4pm. Venue: across Benoni.

Cost: free. Contact: 084 581 6340 or visit benoniartroute.co.za Collector’s Toy Fair There are 70 stalls, offering everything from Dinky toys to Lego, and lots more. Time: 9am–1pm.

Venue: Blairgowrie Recreation Centre, Park Lane, Blairgowrie, Randburg. Cost: free entry. Contact: 011 787 2696, 072 229 7977 or don@ravenscroft.co.za

Joburg Ballet winter school Dancers have the chance to experience the environment of a professional ballet company.

Classes cover ballet, repertoire, contemporary dance, stretching, pas de deux, pointe work, Pilates and more. For children 6–18 years old. 30 June–5 July. Time: children 6–11 year olds 8:30am–1pm, 12–18 year olds 8:30am–4pm; presentation performance on Saturday 10am. Venue: Joburg Theatre Complex, 163 Civic Boulevard, Braamfontein. Cost: R1 700–R2 700. Contact: 011 877 6898 or edgar@joburgballet.com

30 mon

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June 2014

FUN FOR CHILDREN art, culture and science Art and justice tour of the Constitutional Court The tour focuses on the art collection of the Constitutional Court of South Africa, using the artworks as a way to deal with justice. 26 June. Time: 6pm–7:30pm. Venue: meet in the foyer of the Constitutional Court, 50 Hospital St, Constitution Hill, Braamfontein. Cost: free, but donations are welcome. Contact: arts@concourt.org.za Da Vinci – The Genius The exhibition features full-scale models of his inventions, a replica of the Mona Lisa, and studies of his iconic art. Tickets can be purchased at the door. 2 April–22 June. Time: 9am–7pm, last admission 5:30pm. Venue: The Amazing Place, Woodmead, Sandton. Cost: R80– R140. Book through Webtickets: 0861 225 598 or visit davinciexhibition.co.za Days of the Dinosaur Walk among moving, roaring, life-size dinosaurs. This exhibition features more than 45 life-size dinosaurs and two skeletons, a 3-D cinema, excavation zone, Dino Ride and large interactive area for children. 20 June–20 July. Time: 9am–8pm Monday–Thursday, 9am–9pm Friday–Sunday. Venue: Sandton Convention Centre. Cost: adults R140, children 1–18 years old R95, children under 1 free, family of four R395. Book through Computicket: 0861 915 8000 or visit daysofthedinosaur.co.za Peacemakers Museum See this exhibition of Nobel peace laureates. Time: 11am–7pm Monday–Friday, 11am–6pm Saturday and Sunday. Venue: Nelson Mandela Square, 5th Ave, Sandton. Cost: free entry. Contact: info@peacemakersmuseum.co.za or visit peacemakersmuseum.co.za

classes, talks and workshops Creative haven Paint or mosaic using a variety of ceramics or wooden blanks.

They provide guidance and designs.

Booking essential. Children 6 years and younger need to be accompanied by an adult. Time: 9am–4pm Monday–Friday, 9am–2pm Saturday. Venue: Glendower Place Shopping Centre, 99 Linksfield Rd, Dowerglen, Edenvale. Cost: R20 per hour (excluding materials). Contact: 011 453 2721 or visit potteryjunxion.co.za Father’s Day baking workshop Children bake treats for dad’s special day. They do a recipe from scratch that they can serve to their dad on Father’s Day. Booking essential. For children 3–12 years old. 14 June. Time: 10am–11:30am. Venue: Tots n Pots, Shop 10, Kruin Centre, Banket Dr, Helderkruin.

Cost: R200 per child, includes juice, tea and coffee. Contact: 082 389 1564 or visit totsnpots.co.za TamTam Kids Father’s Day workshop Children get creative with baking and crafts and make their dad something special. For children 3 years and older.

11 and 13 June. Time: 2:30pm–4pm.

Venue: TamTam Kids, 102 Wrenrose Court, Wrenrose Ave, Birdhaven. Cost: R250. Contact: 082 807 7100 or tamtamkids@gmail.com

Get artistic with paint at Pottery Junxion

family outings Artists Under the Sun Visit this outdoor exhibition of fine art and sculpture. 31 May–1 June. Time: 9am–4pm. Venue: Zoo Lake, cnr Jan Smuts Ave and Westwold Way, Saxonwold. Cost: free. Contact: 011 432 1482 or visit artistsunderthesun.co.za Keedo’s design your own T-shirt competition Children submit their own T-shirt design and stand a chance of having the design printed on a T-shirt. There are drawing and colouring-in spaces at selected stores. For children 2–9 years old.

1 June–31 July. Time: 9am–5pm, daily.

Venue: Cresta Shopping Centre. Cost: free.

Contact: 021 511 2929 or visit keedo.co.za Ngwenya Glass Village Children can take part in candle dipping and sandart at Jock’s Studio. Time: 9am–5pm, daily. Venue: off Beyers Naudé Dr, Muldersdrift. Cost: free entry. Contact: 011 796 3000, 082 497 6054 or visit shadesofngwenya.co.za

finding nature and outdoor play Gold mine adventure A walk to Confidence Reef, where the first payable gold on the Witwatersrand was discovered.

Includes some gold miners’ food. Booking essential. 28 June. Time: 9am–12pm. Venue: Kloofendal Nature Reserve, Roodepoort.

Cost: R80. Contact: 011 674 2980, 079 693 5608 or visit kloofendalfriends.org.za Melville Koppies group hike Introduce children to indigenous flora. They also learn about the Iron Age and Stone Age. For children 6 years and older. 1, 8, 15 and 22 June. Time: 8 and 22 June: 8:30am; 1 and 15 June: 2pm. Venue: Marks Park Sports Club, Judith Rd, Emmarentia. Cost: adults R50, children R20. Contact: 011 482 4797, fomk@mk.org.za or visit mk.org.za

cakes. For children 4–13 years old.

30 June–18 July. Time: 9am–12pm, Monday–Friday. Venue: Randpark Ridge.

Cost: R240 per child, includes ingredients, crafts and snacks. Contact: 083 228 0343, kimf@littlecooksclub.co.za or visit littlecooksclub.co.za Super science holiday progamme Interactive workshops and science shows at the Groovy Green Globe programme.

28 June–20 July. Time: 9am–5pm Monday– Friday, 9:30am–4:30pm Saturday and Sunday. Venue: Sci-Bono Discovery Centre, cnr Miriam Makeba Rd and President St, Newtown. Cost: R10–R20. Contact: 011 639 8400 or visit sci-bono.co.za Winter craft school Traditional craft workshops in metalwork, copper beating, felting, spinning, art, cooking, jewellery making, basketry and book-binding.

Booking essential. For adults and children 9 years and older. 30 June–4 July. Time: 9am–4pm or 6pm–9pm. Venue: Michael Mount Waldorf School, Culross Rd, Bryanston. Cost: R1 300 for full week, R550 for two-day workshops. Contact Lea: leaholtz@icon.co.za

markets Antique Fair Find a treasure trove of antiques and collectables exhibited by over 40 top dealers. 1 June. Time: 9am–4pm.

Venue: Nelson Mandela Square, West St, Sandton. Cost: free. Contact: 011 217 6001, nelsonmandelasquare@liberty.co.za or visit nelsonmandelasquare.co.za Books2You Book Fair There are hundreds of books to discover. Every book bought helps get free books for your school. For children 3–10 years old. 9 and 10 June.

Time: 10am–3pm Monday, 7:30am–1pm Tuesday. Venue: St Stithians College, Peter Place, Bryanston. Cost: free entry. Contact: 031 705 7744 or orders@books2you.co.za Bryanston Organic Market An outdoor market selling unique, handcrafted goods.

Children can take part in sandart and candle dipping every Thursday and Saturday, and enjoy the scratch patch every Saturday.

Dogs on leashes welcome. Time: 9am–3pm, every Thursday and Saturday. Venue: Michael Mount Waldorf School, 40 Culross Rd, Bryanston. Cost: free entry, children’s activities vary. Contact: 011 706 3671 or visit bryanstonorganicmarket.co.za Market at the Park Visit the numerous stalls selling organic delicacies and freshly squeezed juice and then enjoy a picnic, live entertainment, a jumping castle and a ball pond. Time: 10am–3pm, every Saturday. Venue: cnr Lothbury Rd and

holiday programmes Holidays with Little Cooks Club Boksburg Children make a variety of dishes, from healthy quiches and salads to cookies and muffins. Booking essential. For children 2–15 years old. 30 June–18 July.

Time: 9am–12pm and 1pm–4pm. Venue: 231 Trichardts Rd, Cinderella, Boksburg.

Cost: R160–R240. Contact: 072 271 8904 or erikab@littlecooksclub.co.za Little Cooks Club Roodepoort Little chefs make chicken wraps, biscuits, macaroni and cheese and decorate

30 June–18 July – Little Cooks Club, Boksburg

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Avril Elizabeth Home book sale Avril Elizabeth Home is a nonprofit organisation that cares for people who are intellectually disabled, many with a physical disability. 21 June. Time: 9am–12pm. Venue: Avril Elizabeth Home, 11 Castor Rd, Fishers Hill, Germiston. Cost: free.

Contact: 011 822 2233, jenny@ avril.org.za or visit avril.org.za

sat

Fawley Ave, Melville. Cost: free entry.

Contact: 072 287 4996 or visit Facebook /melvillemarketatthepark Stepping Stones Village Market Browse the stalls and enjoy something to eat. 7 June. Time: 9am–3pm. Venue: Stepping Stones Garden Village, 283 Honeydew Rd West, Northriding. Cost: free entry.

Contact: 083 676 9449, 082 326 2714 or grantcheryl@polka.co.za

on stage and screen Cirque de la Symphonie Aerial flyers, acrobats, contortionists, dancers, jugglers, balancers and strongmen perform routines choreographed to classical masterpieces and popular music in collaboration with the KZN Philharmonic Orchestra. 27–29 June. Time: 8pm Friday and Saturday, 3pm Saturday and Sunday. Venue: Joburg Theatre, 163 Civic Boulevard, Braamfontein.

Cost: R200–R400. Book through the theatre: 0861 670 670 or visit joburgtheatre.com Freckleface Strawberry, The Musical This children’s theatrical production is based on the New York Times bestselling book by actress Julianne Moore. It tells the story of a red-haired, freckle-faced girl who learns that beauty lies not in the mirror, but in the human heart. Booking essential.

9 June–20 July. Time: 9am and 11am, Monday–Saturday during the government school term; 10:30am and 2:30pm, Tuesday–Sunday during the government school holidays. Venue: National Children’s Theatre, 3 Junction Ave, Parktown. Cost: R70–R110. Contact: 011 484 1584/5 or visit nationalchildrenstheatre.org.za My House is Too Small This is a poetic shadow-theatre production loosely based on a German children’s book of the same name.

Puppet shows take place throughout the month. For children 4 years and older. 17–21 June. Time: 3:30pm. Venue: 39 Greenhill Rd, Emmarentia. Cost: R50. Contact: 011 646 0870 or kinderspiel@telkomsa.net

My Son Pinocchio Junior The wooden puppet must show that he is brave, honest and unselfish before he can become a real boy. 19 May–10 August. Time: during government school terms: 9am and 11am Monday–Friday, during government school holidays, Saturdays, public holidays and on certain Sundays: 10:30am and 2:30pm.

Venue: Peoples Theatre, cnr Loveday St and Hoofd St, Joburg Theatre Complex, Braamfontein. Cost: R70–R105. Contact: 011 403 1563/2340 or visit peoplestheatre.co.za Thank You for the Music A tribute to Abba, Queen and the Bee Gees. 3 June–20 July. Time: 8pm Tuesday–Saturday, 2pm Sunday. Venue: Rivonia Barnyard Theatre, Rivonia Crossing 2, Sunninghill. Cost: R100–R160. Contact: 011 234 2033 or visit barnyardtheatre.co.za The Good, the Bad and a Horse This 4-D comic adventure features a brave young sheriff in pursuit of a bank robber. Audience members feel like they are part of the movie with moving seats, large fans above the screen, and little spurts of air tickling their neck and ankles. Time: 9:30am, 11:30am, 1:30pm and 3:30pm. Venue: 4-D Theatre, Gold Reef City Theme Park, cnr Northern Parkway and Data Crescent, Ormonde.

Cost: theme park entry: adults R165, pensioners R110, children R100, children under 3 free, family ticket (two adults and two children under 16) R515. Contact: 011 248 6800 or visit goldreefcity.co.za The Stars of American Ballet American ballet stars perform highlights from classics such as Le Corsaire, Don Quixote and Diana and Actaeon, as well as work by choreographer George Balanchine. 20–22 June. Time: 8pm Friday and Saturday, 3pm Saturday and Sunday, 11am Sunday.

Venue: The Teatro at Montecasino, cnr William Nicol Dr and Witkoppen Rd, Fourways. Cost: R150–R420. Book through Computicket: 0861 915 8000 or visit computicket.com

A 4-D comic adventure: The Good, the Bad and a Horse

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calendar Tick Tock Boom A group of scientists invent a time machine, but a miscalculation muddles up the eras leaving past icons such as Marilyn Monroe, stuck in 2014.

27–29 June. Time: 7:30pm Friday and Saturday, 2:30pm Saturday and Sunday.

Venue: Roodepoort Theatre, 100 Christiaan de Wet Rd, Florida Park, Roodepoort. Cost: R100. Contact: 011 674 1356/7/8/9 or visit roodepoorttheatre.com

20 fri

playtime and story time Bryanston Library’s story time For children 4 years and older. Time: 2:30pm, every Wednesday. Venue: cnr New Rd and Payne St, Bryanston. Cost: free. Contact: 011 706 3518 Story time at National Children’s Theatre Children are taught storytelling, acting, movement, interpretation, music appreciation and rhythm. Space is limited.

For children 4–7 years old. 3 May–21 June.

Time: 9am–10am, every Saturday during the school term. Venue: Story Room, National Children’s Theatre, 3 Junction Ave, Parktown.

Cost: R300 per term. Contact: 011 484 1584 or visit nationalchildrenstheatre.org.za Story time at Norwood Library Children 6–13 years old can enjoy a storybook reading in the library. Time: 10am–12pm, every Saturday. Venue: 94 Iris St, Norwood.

Cost: free. Contact: 011 728 6207 Weltevreden Park Library’s story time Introduce your child to the world of books with an interactive storybook reading. For children 3–6 years old. Time: 3pm–4pm, every Thursday. Venue: Fern St, Weltevreden Park. Cost: free. Contact: 011 679 3406

sport and physical activities Capoeira classes Time: 6:45pm–8:30pm, every Monday and Wednesday. Venue: Norscot Manor Recreation Centre, 16B Penguin Dr, Fourways. Cost: R540 per month; twice a week. Contact: 076 604 6811 Meditation for children Children learn how to relax their minds. Each month they learn a new Dharma tool. For children 3–13 years old. 1 June. Time: 9:30am–10:45am.

Venue: Vajrapani Kadampa Buddhist Centre, 345 Jan Smuts Ave, Craighall Park. Cost: R15 per child. Contact: 011 447 2746 or visit meditation.org.za SunFit exercise classes Increase your fitness levels with kickboxing on Monday, Zumba on Tuesday and Saturday, boot camp on Wednesday, yoga on Thursday and core fitness on Friday. Classes are cancelled in the event of rain. Time: 5:30pm–6:30pm Monday–Friday, 8am– 9am Saturday. Venue: Montecasino, cnr William Nicol Dr and Witkoppen Rd, Fourways. Cost: free. For more info: visit Facebook /StayinShapeWithSunfit

only for parents classes, talks and workshops Barriers to literacy and learning Manage learning problems in the classroom.

This workshop is for teachers, classroom facilitators, school-based therapists, and education support staff. 10 June. Time: 2pm–5pm. Venue: tbc. Cost: R450. For more info: visit sensoryintelligence.co.za

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A Night with the Stars Elvis Blue performs with the Johannesburg Youth Orchestra. 20 June. Time: 7:30pm. Venue: The Mandela at the Joburg Theatre Complex, 163 Civic Boulevard, Braamfontein. Cost: R150–R250. Book through Joburg Theatre: 0861 670 670 or visit joburgtheatre.com

The Bub Hub’s first aid and CPR course Learn the basics during a fourhour CPR and first aid course. Booking essential. For adults and teenagers 16 years and older. Time: 9am–1pm every Saturday. Venue: The Bub Hub Company, Shop GC15, Broadacres Lifestyle Centre.

Cost: R400. Contact: 084 603 1194 or visit thebubhub.co.za TraumaCare parenting talk They offer informative talks on the challenges of parenting. You discuss personalities, understand how your children process information, how to discipline without harm and more. Time: 7pm–9:30pm Wednesday and Thursday, 9am–12pm Saturday. Venue: TraumaCare, 5A Franschhoek Rd, Lonehill.

Cost: R500. Contact: 071 592 9690 or visit traumacare.co.za

on stage and screen Communication skills A two-hour workshop designed to assist people to understand how to communicate effectively.

Booking essential. 18 and 25 June. Time: 9am–11am 18 June, 6pm–8pm 25 June.

Venue: Bellavida Centre, 268 Bryanston Dr, Bryanston. Cost: R250. Contact: 011 463 4438 or visit bellavidacentre.co.za Courses with Domestic Bliss Have your domestic worker trained on an accredited ‘results guaranteed’ childcare or elementary cooking course to ensure your peace of mind when leaving your most “precious possessions” in your childminder’s care.

Course takes place over five-weekly sessions. Childcare course: 3, 10, 17 and 24 June; elementary cooking course: 4, 11 and 18 June. Time: 8:30am–2pm.

Venue: Domestic Bliss, 235 Jan Smuts Ave, Parktown North. Cost: childcare course R2 200, elementary cooking R2 400.

Contact: 011 447 5517, 083 525 4992 or visit domesticbliss.co.za Father’s Day biscuits Learn how to bake and decorate biscuits. Booking essential.

For adults and children 16 years and older. 6 and 7 June. Also offers cupcake decorating workshops 20 and 21 June, and basic cake decorating 28 June. Time: 9am–12:30pm. Venue: Tinybite, Dennis Rd, Athol, Sandton. Cost: biscuit and cupcake workshop R350, cake decorating R450, includes ingredients. Contact: 082 927 9763 or visit tinybite.co.za Fitmommy Time: prenatal classes 9:45am–10:30am; postnatal classes with or without baby 10:30am–11:30am; fitmommy classes 5:30pm–6:30pm; every Monday, Wednesday and Thursday.

Venue: Helderfontein Estate, Chattan Rd, Glenferness. Cost: varies. Contact: 082 895 2513 or visit fitmommy.co.za FreeMe demonstration FreeMe is a rehabilitation centre for injured and neglected animals. Listen to a talk on the organisation, which relies on volunteers and donations. 7 June. Time: 11am.

Venue: Imbizo Hall, Walter Sisulu National Botanical Garden, Malcolm Rd, Poortview, Roodepoort. Cost: members: adults R30, children R15, children under 2 free; nonmembers: adults R60, children R30, children under 2 free. Contact: botsoc@sisulugarden. co.za or visit sanbi.org

Mindful Parenting This presentation attempts to explore resilience through the lens of neuroscience and attachment theory. It explores how mindful parenting serves as a lifelong buffer from stress and trauma. 11 June. Time: 7pm–8pm. Venue: Bellavista School Hall, 35 Wingfield Ave, Birdhaven. Cost: R80. Contact: 011 788 5454 or visit bellavistaschool.co.za Parenting Wisely An empowering workshop for parents who want to improve family dynamics, understand their children and misbehaviour, re-establish parental control, alleviate parental guilt, and more. Booking essential. 13 June. Time: 9am–1pm. Venue: Psychmatters Family Therapy Centre, 9 Park St, Bedfordview.

Cost: R500. Contact: 011 450 3576 or visit psychmatters.co.za SA Culinary Club Learn to whip up a delicious Thai dish during a twohour cooking class. Booking essential. 5, 6, 20, 21 and 28 June. Time: 6pm–8pm Thursday and Friday, 10am–12pm Saturday. Venue: Smeg showroom, 2985 William Nicol Dr, Bryanston. Cost: R350.

Contact: info@saculinaryclub.co.za or visit saculinaryclub.co.za The art of good relationships A two-hour talk that covers the skills and approaches to develop and build good relationships with your loved ones, friends and colleagues. Booking essential. 4 and 11 June. Time: 4 June: 9am–10:30am; 11 June: 6pm–7:30pm. Venue: Bellavida Centre, 268 Bryanston Dr, Bryanston. Cost: R250. Contact: 011 463 4438 or visit bellavidacentre.co.za

Blake and Cortes in SA The British boy band Blake tours with the Icelandic tenor, Cortes. They are accompanied by the Johannesburg Philharmonic Orchestra. 27 and 28 June. Time: 8pm. Venue: Emperors Palace, 64 Jones Rd, Kempton Park. Cost: R300. Book through Computicket: 0861 915 8000 or visit computicket.com Going Gooding This production is a witty, nostalgic account of Malcolm Gooding’s 40-year broadcast career since he joined the SABC English Service in 1967. 8 June.

Time: 5:30pm. Venue: Foxwood Theatre, 13, 5th St, Houghton. Cost: R140. Contact: 011 486 0935, admin@foxwood.co.za The Last Moustache Keeping the audience hanging on every word, acclaimed actor Tim Plewman brings this one-man satire to life and transports the audience back to 1945. Down in the bunker under Berlin you will meet the last remaining Hitler double, Heiner Schmidt, a hapless actor forced at gunpoint to become the Nazi Führer.

18 June–5 July. Time: 8pm Wednesday– Saturday, 3pm Sunday. Venue: Fringe Theatre at the Joburg Theatre Complex, 163 Civic Boulevard, Braamfontein. Cost: R120. Book through Joburg Theatre: 0861 670 670 or visit joburgtheatre.com Tori Amos returns to SA Singersongwriter, pianist and composer Tori Amos returns to South Africa as part of her world tour. She is supported by Durbanborn musician Michael Lowman. 26 and 27 June. Time: 8pm. Venue: The Teatro at Montecasino, cnr William Nicol Dr and Witkoppen Rd, Fourways. Cost: R350– R880. Book through Computicket: 0861 915 8000 or visit computicket.com

out and about

18 June–5 July – Tim Plewman in The Last Moustache

Old Mutual Trophy Wine Show Wine lovers can taste around 100 of the country’s best wines – the trophy, gold or silver medal winners from South Africa’s most authoritative and prestigious wine competition. Selected from an entry of at least 1 000 wines, they have passed the scrutiny of the panel of international and local judges. 12 June. Time: 6pm–9pm.

Venue: Bill Gallagher Room (level 2), Sandton Convention Centre, Maude St, Sandton. Cost: R150, includes a tasting glass and unlimited tastings. Contact: 011 482 5936 or visit trophywineshow.co.za magazine joburg

support groups Mom Squad This support group is for new or expectant moms to share the joys and challenges of motherhood under the guidance of a doctor and mother of two.

Time: 9am–11am, every Thursday. Venue: 4 Pafuri Rd, Emmarentia. Cost: R10 donation towards refreshments. Contact: 082 334 4029 or vandermerwekj@gmail.com

bump, baby & Tot in tow

classes, talks and workshops Baby massage and stimulation class Bond with your baby while learning to stimulate your child’s gross and fine motor skills. They will also take part in messy play.

For babies 6–12 months old. Time: babies from birth–6 months: 9am–11am every Tuesday; babies 6–12 months: 2pm–4pm every Wednesday. Venue: The Bub Hub Company, shop GC15, Broadacres Lifestyle Centre. Cost: R650 for five classes. Contact: 084 603 1194 or visit thebubhub.co.za Mom n Babes yoga Develop a shared sense of fun, while improving balance and coordination. For babies 3 weeks and older.

Time: 3pm–4pm every Thursday. Venue: Genesis Clinic, 5 Northwold Dr, Saxonwold.

Cost: R150. Contact: 076 081 7615 or visit yogamama.co.za

playtime and story time Kay’s Place A colourful, indoor adventure playground where children can climb, slide and crawl in a secure environment. For children 6 months and older. Venue: Kay’s Place, level 4, Kyalami Downs Shopping Centre, Main Rd, Midrand. Cost: R30– R40 per hour, Monday–Friday; R35–R45 per hour, Saturday–Sunday; R75 for three hours. Contact: 083 200 2203 or visit kaysplace.co.za Larney Ladybirds’ play days A country manor house for big and small people with a fully equipped playground and rolling lawns. 25 June. Time: 10am–4pm (closed 8 August). Venue: Valley Rd, Broadacres, Fourways. Cost: adults R25, including cake or muffin and bottomless tea or coffee), children R15, includes a packet of chips, juice, fruit stick and a small surprise. Contact: 083 770 7702 or visit larneyladybirds.co.za Orango Tango’s An indoor playground with ball ponds, jungle gyms, bumping cars and a soft toy area. Children need to wear socks. For children 1–12 years old. Time: 9am–5pm Monday–Thursday and Sunday, 9am–6pm Friday and Saturday.

Venue: Orango Tango’s, Northcliff Corner Shopping Centre, cnr Beyers Naudé Dr and Milner Ave. Cost: R60 Monday–Friday; R70 Saturday and Sunday; children under 2 years old R40, children under 1 year old free. Contact: 011 782 3917, 084 775 9797 or info@orangotangos.co.za

Play days at Elf’s Hill There are jungle gyms, trampolines, treehouses, a Wendy house, bike track, sandpit, toadstool house, cricket pitch and more. Time: 1pm–5pm, every Wednesday. Venue: Elf’s Hill, plot 29, Sandspruit Rd, Farmall. Cost: adults R30, includes cake, tea/coffee, children R20, includes a packet of chips and juice.

Contact: 082 337 5646 or visit elfshill.co.za

support groups Epilepsy South Africa For advice, counselling and support. They can direct you to a support group in your area.

Contact: 086 037 4537, gauteng@epilepsy. org.za or visit epilepsy.org.za La Leche League A breast-feeding support group. For more info on meetings and branches in your area: visit llli.org

it’s party time For more help planning your child’s party visit

childmag.co.za/resources/birthday-parties

how to help Botshabelo This non-profit organisation serves the community of Olievenhoutbosch and surrounds. There are three projects where you can help: a home that cares for abandoned babies, preschool catering to underprivileged families, and a preschool teacher training programme. They are situated at 64 Main Rd (on the R55), Crowthorne, Kyalami. Contact: 082 225 2625, office@botshabelo.co.za or visit botshabelo.co.za Donate your old newspapers Lory Park Zoo and Animal Sanctuary is always in need of old newspapers and other items.

To drop off: Lory Park Zoo, 180 Kruger Rd, President Park, Midrand. Contact Eddy: 011 315 7307 or visit lorypark.co.za to view their wish list Stop Hunger Now Package meals for the underprivileged. The meals are then distributed to 14 areas across Gauteng. 14 June. Time: 9am. Venue: 11A Knightsgate, Jonas Rd, Driehoek, Germiston. Cost: free. Contact: 011 872 2498 or visit stophungernowsa.org The Lighthouse Baby Shelter This safe haven for abandoned and unwanted babies welcomes monetary donations and baby products. Visit them at 48 Drysdale Rd, Sundowner. Contact: 011 795 4207 or visit thelighthousebabyshelter.co.za

Donate your old newspapers to Lory Park Zoo

don’t miss out!

For a free listing, email your event to joburg@childmag.co.za or fax it to 011 234 4971. Information must be received by 30 May for the July issue, and must include all relevant details. No guarantee can be given that it will be published. To post an event online, visit childmag.co.za

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it’s party time continued...

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finishing touch

copycats CASSANDRA SHAW describes how her son picks up on everything – even the things she wishes he hadn’t.

i

t’s amazing how impressionable children are. I distinctly remember taking a Sunday drive with my family in the countryside one day, when my sister, who was three years old at the time, exclaimed to my step-dad, who’s known for being a bit vocal when behind the wheel, “Look Daddy, there are no *&%-*$@!s on the road today.”

Our son has also repeated a few choice words he’s learnt from us. And, like my step-dad, we also had sheepish looks on our faces.

As parents, we don’t realise how much of what we say and do is picked up by our children. They remember and associate things you wouldn’t have even thought twice about. During a Skype conversation with his grandpa

recently, my son quickly went to his room and grabbed his tiger hat and harmonica, because he now associated these objects with my dad, whom he’d visited almost a year ago.

At the moment these are The Jungle Book, The Lion King and 101 Dalmatians.

After he watches these shows he loves to pretend he’s a bear like Baloo, a powerful lion like Mufasa, or a dog like Pongo. So

Children remember and associate things you wouldn’t have even thought twice about.

During these early years a child’s mind is a sponge as they try to come to grips with social practices and the world around them. So, as parents, we’ve really got to be on our best behaviour – even while driving.

Being aware of the things they take part in or watch on TV is just as important. Our son, like most children, loves it when he is allowed to watch his favourite movies.

he’ll dance, roar and bark his way around the house. He’s even set up an area on the couch to look like Pride Rock. And when he’s pretending to be a dog he picks up his teddy bears with his mouth. My least favourite trait has to be when he tries to eat his food – face first in his plate.

Our children also pick up things from their friends. For the longest time our

son refused to eat bananas after learning that some children from his school were not big fans of bananas. After that, no matter how hard I tried, he’d scrunch up his nose, stick out his tongue and say, “Yuck!”

That all changed, however, thanks to his favourite characters from a certain movie based in the jungle. The other morning, he actually came into the kitchen asking for a banana after seeing the two main characters scoff down copious amounts of the yellow fruit. Finally!

Now if only there was something that would make a positive impression on him when it comes to eating baby marrows…

Cassandra is a freelance editor and writer who often blogs about her life as a Canadian living in Cape Town.

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PHOTOGRAPH: MENKE BONNEMA

Cassandra and her son