P r e t o r i a’ s
b e s t
g u i d e
f o r
pa r e n t s
25 in december
things
to do
all set for
summer? stay safe in the sun & water
everyday
skincare
for delicate skin
happy holidays www.childmag.co.za
Dec 2014 / Jan 2015
free
health
back-to-school
the right age to start school all sorted for the new year teaching children not to blame themselves
education
entertainment
Hunter House P UB L IS H ING
Publisher Lisa Mc Namara • lisa@childmag.co.za
Editorial Managing Editor Marina Zietsman • marina@childmag.co.za Features Editor Marc de Chazal • features@childmag.co.za Resource Editor Simone Jeffery • pretoria@childmag.co.za Editorial Assistant Lucille Kemp • capetown@childmag.co.za Copy Editor Debbie Hathway
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The spirit and sparkle of Christmas reawakens a childlike wonderment in me. Do you feel the same way about the festive season? I have always loved Christmas and the promise of lazy family time that surrounds it. Once again, we have done all the hard work for you and rounded up literally hundreds of things to do as a family these holidays. It’s time to let go of the stress and strain, and the mundane, and take in all that the holiday season has to offer. Whether you are keen to get out and catch a Christmas show or simply laze around at home, we hope you draw your inspiration for some serious family fun from
Pretoria’s Child magazineTM is published monthly by Hunter House Publishing, PO Box 12002, Mill Street, 8010. Office address: Unit 5, First Floor, Bentley Office Park, cnr Rivonia and Wessel Rd, Rivonia. Tel: 011 807 6449, fax: 011 234 4971, email: info@childmag.co.za.
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this, our bumper Happy Holidays issue. Why not capture the mood of the season by making your own Christmas decorations, mince pies or gingerbread men? Or if you are feeling more energetic, pack a picnic and head for the park for a game of Frisbee. With none of the usual school or work commitments, your options are endless and the joy of giving your time to your children has to be the greatest gift of all. ’Tis the season for holiday fun… enjoy!
Lisa Mc Namara Publisher
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December 2014 / January 2015
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contents december / january
12 3 a note from lisa
regulars
6 over to you readers respond
8 pregnancy news – bump on the move expert advice for pregnant drivers. By Marina Zietsman
features 14 what’s the right age to start school? some say it’s to your child’s advantage to start school early, others disagree. Glynis Horning considers both arguments
17 the blame game children often feel it’s their fault when bad things happen at home. Glynis Horning gives advice on how to handle self-blame
20 keep it green in her recipe book, Star Fish, Daisy Jones only uses the 10
9 best for baby – in the clear Lucille Kemp discusses the sensitive skin of babies and how to prevent and treat certain skin irritations
10 dealing with difference – travelling with a special needs child Deirdré Amy Gower and her wheelchair-bound son travelled far and wide through South Africa
12 resource – what should we do today? Child magazine compiles 25 inspirational activity ideas to keep boredom at bay this festive season
most sustainable fish on the SASSI green list for her delectable dishes
22 checked off Child magazine compiles a handy checklist to help you prepare for the new school year
24 what’s on in december and january 30 finishing touch Cassandra Shaw hopes her son makes time for nature in his busy city life
health
classified ads
7 make safety your priority
30 family marketplace
Marc de Chazal gives you tips on how to stay safe in the sun and water
31 let’s party
this month’s cover images are supplied by:
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December 2014 / January 2015
Joburg
Cape Town
Durban
Pretoria
Spree.co.za spree.co.za/kids
Sheldon Moultrie sheldonmoultrie.co.za
Sarah-Jane Photography sarahjanephotography.co.za
Tanya Rudman De Sousa trphoto.co.za
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December 2014 / January 2015
5
letters
over to you your voice on childmag.co.za in response to “have you lost your marbles?” We have just introduced our four-year-old son to marbles, out of sentimentality, and it has been one of his favourite pastimes ever since. There is a lot of merit in going back to old-fashioned toys. Through games like marbles, children interact with other people, which will surely teach them life skills and emotional intelligence. Surisa foul language My daughter is 13 years old. This year is her first year at a new school. I was very concerned when I saw the WhatsApp exchanges between her and two other classmates. The other girls were cursing a lot in the conversation. The three of them apparently love anime and writing stories. So, they often start a story and each of them write a part of the storyline. A few days ago, I read my daughter’s notebook and found that she had written curses as part of the storyline. She said one of her friends asked her to. Then I saw photos of anime characters online with sexual innuendos. There were even
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December 2014 / January 2015
Let us know what’s on your mind. Send your letters or comments to marina@childmag. co.za or PO Box 12002, Mill Street, 8010.
photos of Ninja Turtles with sexual themes and a discussion going on about the sexual preferences of the characters. We do not curse at home and have never even uttered anything worse than “damn”. It’s frightening to see my girl exposed to these kinds of friends. What should I do? Anonymous Childmag asked Gary Koen, a clinical psychologist and one of our regular writers, to respond: “Well, the good news is that your daughter has presented you with the opportunity to talk about a whole range of very important aspects of being a teenager – from sex and sexuality, freedom of expression and creativity, to the value of friendship and how the company you keep is a reflection of who you are – not to mention the omnipresent internet. Your daughter and her friends certainly sound very creative, which in itself is a wonderful ability, but while 13 year olds definitely do swear, to use swearwords as a means of creative expression sounds to me more for shock value and an attempt to appear more sophisticated than they really are. Their real challenge is to develop and expand their range of creative expression so, at this stage, to use swearwords is
both inappropriate and quite limited. I wouldn’t necessarily simply blame the friends though, because one of the hallmarks of adolescence is the process of leaving home and encountering the outside world, which is full of sex and swearing, and our teenagers’ eyes and ears are wide open. Your role as a parent is to build your relationship with your teenager so that you are able to continuously talk about all these changes and challenges, and this would include, among other things, the type of friends they want to hang out with.” in response to “10 fun teaching games for children” These are great ideas. I am going to adjust them to suit my students. Hazel-Ann subscribe to our newsletter and win Our wins have moved online. Please subscribe to our newsletter and enter our weekly competitions. To subscribe, visit childmag.co.za
We reserve the right to edit and shorten submitted letters. The opinions reflected here are those of our readers and are not necessarily held by Hunter House Publishing.
Post a comment online at childmag.co.za
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s
outh Africans love sunshine – we get plenty of it, after all. In the heat of summer families hit the beaches, pools and garden sprinklers in their numbers. It’s up to parents to ensure their children are adequately protected from the cancer risks of the African sun and from the dangers of drowning.
sun safety
water safety
When your family is out and about in the summer sun • Drink plenty of fluids to avoid dehydration. • Use appropriate sunscreen. Dr Daynia Ballot, paediatric neonatologist and chairperson of the Wits Paediatric Fund, recommends we use sunscreen with an SPF factor between 15 and 30 for children. “Anything higher has certain chemical additives best avoided for young skins,” says Ballot. • Covering up with sunhats and UV protective swimwear is also a good idea. “UV protective clothing provides extra protection from the dangers of sun exposure and can also help ease a parent’s conscience if the hourly sunscreen reapplication is forgotten,” points out Ballot. • Try to avoid the strongest rays of the sun between 10am and 4pm.
According to the Medical Research Council, drowning is one of the leading causes of accidental death in children under the age of five years old. The sea, rivers and dams are all potentially dangerous, but public and private swimming pools are the main danger hotspots.
make
safety your
PHOTOGRAPHS: shutterstock.com
priority
Ensure your family stays safe while enjoying the summer sun with these handy tips. By MARC DE CHAZAL
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health
Important things you should do to prevent tragedy • Make sure your children never swim alone and are always supervised by an adult. • Learn life-saving skills such as CPR in the event of an emergency. • Ensure your children can swim properly, but know their limits. Cape Town-based swimming instructor Ross Johnston advises that children start swimming lessons as early as possible. “A child who starts swimming before his first birthday will be swimming on his own by three years old,” he says. • Make sure they only swim in safe areas. The Childsafe campaign cautions homeowners with pools against relying on only one safety barrier as this can create a false sense of security. Studies in the US reveal that 70% of all pool drownings occur in fenced pools. To make your pool safer, use multiple layers of safety. Your pool fence should be SABSapproved and have a lockable, self-latching, spring-loaded gate. You should also have a well-fitted, good quality net that can hold your child above water over the entire surface of the pool. To really beef up safety, use a subsurface pool alarm that will alert you if your child enters the water without you noticing.
Sunlight is one of our main sources of vitamin D, but unprotected exposure can lead to skin cancer. We have one of the highest incidences of skin cancer in the world, reports the Cancer Association of South Africa.
flying the flag There are 57 Blue Flag beaches in South Africa. This international award is given to beaches that meet the criteria for safety, amenities, cleanliness and environmental standards. So if you’re looking for a beach with excellent life-saving standards, top-rate parking and clean ablution facilities, then opt for one with Blue Flag status. Visit blueflag.org.za
December 2014 / January 2015
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pregnancy news
bump on the move Being pregnant doesn’t mean you shouldn’t drive.
any pregnant women believe a seatbelt and airbags can cause more harm than good to them in an accident. Car safety for unborn children still needs more research because foetal injury and death are rarely part of statistics, but Swedish car manufacturer Volvo has developed a virtual crash test dummy called Linda, which is of average size and approximately “36 weeks pregnant”. Linda simulates how a pregnant woman moves in a crash and how the foetus moves inside her. They also researched how the seatbelt and airbag affect the woman and the foetus. After Linda was used in several simulated frontal collision tests, the conclusion was that everyone should wear a seatbelt – and in the case of pregnant women, it should be used correctly. The virtual tests also proved that airbags offer protection for both the mother and the foetus.
a snug fit Petro Kruger, director and cofounder of The Road Safety Foundation, explains how seatbelts should be used. “The lap-belt portion should be placed well under your pregnant tummy, snugly fitting over your pelvis and pubic bone and across your hips as high up on your thighs as possible. It’s really important that while driving you constantly check to see the lap belt has not risen up onto your bump,” says Kruger. “The shoulder strap should be positioned off to the side of the uterus and between the breasts. Again it’s important that while driving you routinely check that the shoulder belt is not lying directly over your bump as this could increase the risk of injury to your unborn baby during a high-speed collision.” The aim is to be restrained over the body’s stronger areas, like the upper torso and pelvis, thus protecting the weaker parts of the body, such as the soft abdomen containing the fragile foetus. Kruger advises you make sure the SA National Standards Authority or the European Standards authority has approved your seatbelt.
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December 2014 / January 2015
sitting pretty Kruger says it’s advisable to sit as far back from the steering wheel as your legs will allow with the steering wheel tilted, normally downwards, to suit the size of your bump and stature. Your seat should not be too far back to compromise safe driving and control – about a 10cm space between your belly and the steering wheel is recommended.
air force “Pregnant women worry unnecessarily about injuries to their unborn baby following deployment of airbags,” says Kruger. “Any injuries that have been reported as a result of airbag deployment are most likely because of sitting too close to the steering wheel, or the incorrect wearing of seatbelts or not wearing one at all.” Kruger emphasises that airbags should never be seen as an alternative to seatbelts.
general safety • I f you are involved in a car accident, inform emergency medical personnel that you are pregnant. • Even if you are involved in a low-speed bumper bash, visit your doctor as soon as possible. • Carry a letter from your doctor confirming your pregnancy with your medical aid card. In case of a serious road accident, medical personnel will find this letter when looking for your medical aid details. Courtesy of The Road Safety Foundation
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PHOTOGRAPH: shutterstock.com
m
MARINA ZIETSMAN gives some safety tips.
best for baby
in the clear A baby has an immature immune system and a far
PHOTOGRAPH: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM
a
more delicate skin than ours, making them more prone to developing skin sensitivities, writes LUCILLE KEMP.
part from a once-off bout of nappy rash during teething, Cape Town mom Alison’s son Jude didn’t suffer at all from the issues that affect many babies with sensitive skin. This could have been simple luck or it could have been due to the fact that she heeded professional advice to not disrupt his natural skin barrier. As standard practice from the time he was born, she stayed away from soap, bathing and moisturising Jude only with emollient cream. If your baby suffers from dry skin, hives, nappy rash, cradle cap, heat rash, welts that flare up from insect bites or eczema, Cape Town paediatrician Dr Salome Abbott and Durban specialist dermatologist Dr Imraan Jhetam both suggest as a starting point to adopt a skincare regime that addresses the specific needs of a baby.
effective everyday skincare Abbott says that colourants and perfumes have been found to irritate the skin and can cause flare-ups. For this reason dermatologists always recommend soapfree cleansers, according to Jhetam, as this will not strip the skin of moisture, as well as fragrance-free moisturizers to hydrate and maintain the delicate skin
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barrier. What works for one child may not work for another. Some moms have found surprising fixer-uppers for various skin irritations that are available without a prescription and have actually been suggested to them by their doctors – zinc ointment has helped bad nappy rash and welts have been effectively treated with petroleum jelly. If your baby has been diagnosed with eczema, hydration with the use of a fragrance-free moisturizer needs to be more frequent, also bathing with glycerine soap maintains skin hydration. Jhetam says that if the skin is very dry, such as during winter, very fatty moisturizers such as an emulsifying ointment may be required more often; Abbott recommends at least twice a day. Under a dermatologist’s supervision, treatment with mild cortisone cream may be needed to ease the inflammation of eczema and antihistamine syrup may be required to reduce the itching.
what to avoid Jhetam says water-based creams are not ideal for use, and you should look out for moisturizers that contain humectants like Cetamacrogol and fatty ingredients
like ceramides, glycerine and shea butter. Also, avoid products with urea as this may irritate the delicate skin and lanolin-based creams that may also cause irritation. “Research has shown that fabric softeners and detergents do not adversely affect a baby’s skin, but rather the type of fabric, so avoid wool and opt for cotton,” advises Jhetam.
for severe eczema A study was done on eczema sufferers between six months and 17 years old and published in the May 2009 issue of Paediatrics. Bleach baths were found to be safe and effective when you soak the child for five to 10 minutes twice a week in a diluted bleach bath; scientists used a scant but specific dosage. “Diluted bleach baths are effective in treating children whose eczema is difficult to control,” says Abbott. “It works by helping clear the skin of bacteria. However, it should only be done under the supervision of a doctor.”
December 2014 / January 2015
9
dealing with difference
travelling with a special needs child
Enjoying the scenery on a bicycle trail
DEIRDRÉ AMY GOWER has travelled around South Africa with her wheelchair-bound son and shares some practical tips for families facing similar challenges.
i
n June 2013, after taking my wheelchair-bound son, Damian (15), out of school for scheduled surgery and resigning from my job to be able to care for him during the four- to six-month recovery period, we found ourselves at a loose end when the surgery was unexpectedly cancelled. I decided on a three-week road trip to visit family while determining the way forward. Fourteen months later, that road trip has taken us on an extraordinary journey – discovering new places, forging friendships and finding a gentler way to live. We left Cape Town with some surprises in store for us, and I have packed – and unpacked – our car more times than I can count. The first leg of our trip included stops in Swellendam, the Garden Route, Port Elizabeth and then on to East London to our family. From there we travelled to the KwaZulu-Natal Midlands, exploring the area as well as further afield to Durban – visiting a number of attractions and overcoming accessibility challenges when they arose. With time to spare en route back to Cape Town, our real adventures began. We stopped in Plettenberg Bay for two weeks as part of a farm volunteer programme – and ended up staying five months. Exchanging my office stilettos for gumboots, and with Damian by my side, we spent our days looking after and riding horses – a far cry from rushed city life. Returning to Cape Town to pick up where we left off, after a brief holiday with several more adventures in our own city ranging from a boat trip to Seal Island and a horseback safari, we found ourselves on another volunteer farm. Once again, one month became five. We have learnt to adapt to diverse environments, to streamline our travel preparations and appreciate every moment – good or bad – as part of the journey. After all, a good journey is not just a physical trip, it is an exploration of self, broadening of horizons and building of resilience – and if we can share these things with our children, how fortunate we are.
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December 2014 / January 2015
packing the car I have mastered the art of getting the maximum number of items into the minimum amount of space. Make sure wheelchairs are easily accessible – the first inclination is to pack bulkier items first. Whether stopping at attractions along the way, or doing a trip in one go, the wheelchair will be the first item needed at your destination. Pack clothing into smaller bags that can be used to fill spaces rather than one big bag that takes up space.
seating “The child should be well positioned and should be moved or stretched at least every two hours,” says occupational therapist Megan Giljam. “Positioning in the car is really important to prevent developing any deformities, inhibiting any patterns of movement like extension and ensuring adequate comfort and pressure relief. It is also quite important for the child to be able to see out the window and experience the excitement of a road trip.”
accommodation challenges Staying in different establishments, each with their own set of accessibility challenges, is a lesson in flexibility. Access to buildings is the first obstacle. Even if there are ramped entrances, the terrain leading to the place may be unpaved, making manoeuvring a wheelchair an exercise in strength and patience. The next hurdle is the bathroom. Some accommodation venues only have showers, which makes washing a differently-abled child difficult.
refreshments and bathroom stops “Special needs children need nutrientdense food,” says Cape Town nutritional therapist Heidi du Preez. “The journey alone might be stressful enough for them to cope with and should not be filled with sugarladen junk food. Plan ahead and pack healthy snacks.” I find Damian loses his appetite while travelling long distances, so keeping him hydrated is vital, though he will occasionally snack on yoghurt, bananas or
As volunteers on a farm in Malmesbury
Troy, the horse, and Damian on the farm in Plettenberg Bay
biltong – all of which are easy to pack and eat. Bathroom stops are tricky ordeals, so easy access to a wheelchair is essential.
benefit from games such as I-spy and count the lampposts or simply paging through books and cuddling a fluffy toy.
entertainment
activities and adventures
Music is always a winning choice for us, whether relaxing melodies or fun songs. When music isn’t doing the trick, “spot all the white cars” is an excellent concentration game. Sometimes, after 10 minutes of silence and the game forgotten (at least for me), Damian will pipe up with an insistent “There!” indicating the approaching white car with his eyes. Special needs teacher, Joanne Heinen, from Alta du Toit School in Cape Town, often travels with her students and finds that the higher functioning children love to amuse themselves with iPads, while the lower functioning children
• Animal parks and aquariums are popular choices, and many cater for wheelchair users. • River rafting is a fun option and a child can be seated snugly in the nose of a rubber croc, with a life jacket, while Mom and/or Dad paddle. • With a selection of bicycle trailers now on the market, special needs children can be included on cycling outings. • Horse riding is therapeutic as well as enjoyable. Many riding schools have suitable ponies on which special needs children can be led with assistance.
tips for flying Zelda Mycroft, CEO of the Chaeli Campaign and mom to inspirational International Children’s Peace Prize winner 2011, Chaeli Mycroft, shares tips from their travel experiences. booking your flight • When booking wheelchair assistance, some domestic carriers will give you a pile of additional medical forms to complete. • Book middle and aisle seats, which are easier for access to the toilet and the passenger assist unit (PAU). Online bookings often don’t have the wheelchair/ disability information related to booking readily available. • When booking an international flight, it’s essential to mention that you will need assistance. Make sure when you book that there is a slipper seat available on board for in-flight use (to take larger children to the toilet). checking in and boarding • Ask questions – do not assume people know what to do. • Request a seat that works best for you. • Ensure PAU is booked. • Ensure that the slipper seat is available for transit onto the plane. • Flight attendants are generally friendly and especially helpful. additional tips • Prepare for any eventuality – pack a spare emergency bag with clothes, antidiarrhoea meds and other essentials. • Be patient and prepared to be last off. Don’t be in a hurry to go anywhere if you need assistance getting off the plane. • Wet wipes are essential, along with a well-cultivated sense of humour. • Introduce yourself to the person you are sitting next to – you might need their help at some stage.
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December 2014 / January 2015
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resource
what should we do today? Keep your children busy in the holidays with these 25 family-friendly activities from CHILD MAGAZINE. Each day, you can do something new.
collect pine cones Turn them into pine cone animals, angels or mini Christmas trees with some spray paint, glitter and cardboard.
visit a christmas market and bargain hunt for unique gifts. Kamers vol Geskenke is in Irene from 2 to 7 December.
dress-up, choose a theme and stage your own play.
write a letter to family overseas and include some photos.
take a cultural tour Ekala Eco Tours offers cultural tours of Soweto, Alexandra Township and the Lesedi Cultural Village.
make or do something from your parents’ childhood One idea is to learn a traditional family recipe, like mince pies.
ride a train Take a trip on a
sing christmas carols by candlelight or attend a candlelit concert. The Jakaranda Children’s Home Christmas Light Festival is taking place from 1 to 31 December.
steam engine. The Friends of the Rail steam from Hermanstad station for Cullinan on 6, 7, 14 and 16 December.
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December 2014 / January 2015
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PHOTOGRAPHS: shutterstock.com
watch a children’s play One great option this December is The Little Mermaid performed at the Pretoria Youth Theatre.
play garden games Make visit a library for story time and choose a book to take home. Glenstantia Library offers occasional story time for children as well as holiday programmes.
alphabet pebbles and play Scrabble outside. Play giant Jenga, grass twister or tic-tac-toe. Play pool noodle croquet, with noodles placed over tent pegs in a hoop. Have sack, threelegged and egg-and-spoon races.
play frisbee Find camp out in the garden, roast marshmallows and stargaze.
have a water balloon contest Fill up small balloons with water, making sure each person has enough. Then give chase around the garden and see who can avoid getting wet.
visit an indoor playground spend a day at the dam Pack a picnic lunch, blankets and a ball. Hire a canoe, swim and skim stones.
Safari Garden Centre in Lynnwood is a nursery with a covered playground.
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a park, nature reserve or beach with enough space to throw a Frisbee. If there are enough of you, set up teams and try scoring Frisbee goals.
freeze dinosaurs or other plastic toys in a tub of water, then chisel the toys out.
visit a bike park where you’ll
start a garden Plant a veggie patch, start a herb box, make a flowerbed or turn an old fish tank into a fairy garden or terrarium.
find a variety of tracks to suit all sorts of skill levels. Try out Groenkloof Nature Reserve.
bake a gingerbread man Decorate it with small sweets and icing (mix icing sugar and water together for a basic icing). Feeling more creative? Try a gingerbread house.
go on a treasure hunt Draw a map and let your children set off in search of hidden treasure.
make stained glass windows Cut a frame out of black cardboard and stick coloured tissue paper behind the frame, or use clear contact and stick it onto this.
ride a pony Two great venues are Jingle Jangle in Moreleta Park or Kinderplaas Zoo in Rietfontein.
go bowling Try out superbowling at The Fun Company in The Grove, which even has a glowin-the-dark evening experience.
make a book or film a movie. Write a story from your holidays and illustrate it, or film Christmas on a smartphone and turn it into a family movie.
December 2014 / January 2015
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education
what’s the right age to
start school?
While some educationalists insist starting school early gives children a head start in life, others argue a delayed beginning brings an accumulative advantage.
i
n an era when we all want to give our children the best start in life, the pressure of parental competition can be fierce. No wonder we agonise over the most advantageous age to start school. In South Africa, moves are afoot to drop the age to five years old by making schooling from Grade R level compulsory, but currently the earliest we can enrol our children is at five-and-a-half. They must turn six by 30 June of their Grade 1 year, and have to start school by the year in which they turn seven. The Department of Education stipulates that no child may be tested for school readiness before they have been accepted by the school, and that denying a child
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December 2014 / January 2015
admission on the grounds that they’re not “school-ready” is discriminatory. This puts the onus on us to decide when our child should start, within the government’s framework. For many parents, the earlier they start the better. “Kayla’s really smart. She began reading by three, and I wanted to send her at four to give her an edge,” says her mother, Sandra*, a 28-year-old Durban clothing designer. “That’s the age children start school in the UK where my sister lives, and her two are now ahead. It doesn’t seem fair.” Starting early can help keep bright children stimulated, boost their self-esteem (at being “smart enough” to go), and enable them to finish school earlier and start a career younger, maximizing their earning years. Internationally,
however, a growing number of parents are delaying the start of their children’s schooling, many inspired by Malcolm Gladwell’s best-seller Outliers: The Story of Success (Black Bay Books). Gladwell cites a study showing a disproportionate number of top Canadian hockey players were born early in the school year. Because they were older, and therefore bigger, stronger and more mature than younger competitors, they were more likely to be identified early as better athletes, given extra coaching, and selected for elite leagues. The implication is that a similar “accumulative advantage” could apply academically and in other areas for children who start later.
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PHOTOGRAPHS: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM
GLYNIS HORNING weighs the pros and cons.
There is increasing evidence to support the benefits of a later start to formal education – but it rests less on “accumulative advantage” than on the importance of children spending more years at play. As British psychologist and researcher David Whitebread, author of Developmental Psychology and Early Childhood Education (Sage), puts it, “Neuroscientific studies have shown that playful activity leads to synaptic growth, particularly in the frontal cortex, the part of the brain responsible for all the uniquely human higher mental functions.” And his and other studies have demonstrated “superior learning and motivation from playful, as opposed to instructional, approaches to learning in children.”
School readiness has as much to do with emotional readiness and independence as cognitive ability. Disturbingly, Whitebread says studies have documented the loss of play opportunities for children over the past few decades, and demonstrated “a clear link with increased indicators of stress and mental health problems.” Recent New Zealand studies of children who started formal literacy lessons at ages five and seven, showed that by 11 there was no difference in reading ability level between them – and those who started at five developed less positive attitudes to reading, and showed poorer text comprehension. A separate study of 15-year-olds in 55
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countries showed “no significant association” between reading achievement and school entry age.
ready to perform “School readiness has as much to do with emotional readiness and independence as cognitive ability,” says Cape Town educational psychologist Dr René Daniels. It requires having the self-esteem and confidence to handle different situations, and generally a child of five is developmentally less confident and able to cope than one of seven. Starting primary school is a major milestone, and older children are usually better able to separate from their
parents, interact with other children, listen to teachers, follow instructions, and remember things, says Daniels – “especially if they’ve been in educare before entering formal schooling.” Older children are also better able to tolerate an 8am to 2pm school day without tiring easily, says Benoni educational psychologist Matshidiso Maseko. Children can sense success and failure keenly, and if they cope better, they are more likely to be positive about school and do better. If they struggle compared to classmates, it can crush their confidence and discourage them, putting them off school and learning. “It’s
should your child repeat a year? If your child doesn’t cope at school and proves emotionally or cognitively unready, should you hold them back? Children can understand the idea of failure as young as three years old and feel bad repeating a year, questioning their self-worth, unless you convey the message to them carefully, says Dr René Daniels. But promoting them when they’re not ready can cause similar self-esteem issues and the feeling of not being good enough. 1 Rule out physical and emotional issues such as sickness, changes or traumas. 2 Explore alternatives: extra homework, tutoring, reading more with them, using stickers to reward progress. 3 Get advice from teachers and an educational psychologist – they may require specialised educational intervention, occupational therapy, speech and language therapy, ADD monitoring or a remedial school rather than retention. 4 If they are to be retained, preferably do it in the first grade. 5 Know that some studies show gains in achievement for the first year, but these are small and grow smaller. 6 Know that retention has been associated with increased problems with behaviour and peer relationships. 7 Know too that some children forge ahead and flourish by being more mature than many new classmates. 8 Once you’ve decided, adopt a positive attitude about why this is the best thing and will help them catch up. 9 Give them an explanation to give others: “I was sick a lot when I was little” or “I just need more practise”. 10 Encourage them to express their feelings – they may need to grieve being separated from their friends. 11 Have them meet their new teacher and set up playdates with children who will be in their class. 12 Ditch self-doubt – even if this is a loss for your child right now, it doesn’t mean you’re not doing the right thing.
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heartbreaking when little ones aren’t able to meet the demands of a structured academic environment,” says Daniels. “It really damages self-esteem if parents pressurise children to perform when they’re not ready.” In a study by Britain’s Institute of Fiscal Studies Research, children born at the end of the year, and therefore younger than others in class, were likely to score substantially lower in assessments, and were more than twice as likely to report being unhappy at school and being bullied. Lacking emotional maturity, independence and resilience and being generally smaller than others makes younger children vulnerable, and in large classes teachers can struggle to give them the extra attention and care they need, says Daniels. They can also be unfairly labelled as failures or as not wanting to carry out instructions, says Maseko, when they’re simply not ready for formalised tuition. Ironically, bright or gifted children such as Kayla can suffer the most from starting school early. A major US study over eight decades found that their intellect benefited from being slowed down in the early years so they could develop naturally. And according to Dr Richard House of Roehampton University’s Research Centre for Therapeutic Education in the UK, pushing smart children into formal schooling too early can result in their growing up in an “intellectually unbalanced” way, with possible lifelong negative health effects. Not all children benefit from delayed entry. The US National Association for the Education of Young Children reports that some children who start older worry that they have failed, and develop poor attitudes toward school. They are more likely to have behaviour problems and drop out. Bottom line? There is no “perfect time” for a child to start school. “Each case should be treated on merit,” says
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Daniels. Every child is unique, and a holistic view of them should be taken, including their cognitive and emotional development. Factors to consider include their personality, home circumstances, medical history (such as recurring ear infections), even their position in the family – first-borns tend to mature earlier, says Daniels, although Maseko observes that they can sometimes be immature “due to parental anxiety”. The key, say both psychologists, is to understand your child’s strengths and weaknesses, and to start them at school only when you are quite sure they are ready and will be happy – whatever their age. *Name has been changed.
is your child ready for school? Most preschools assess children for school readiness in their final year, or an occupational therapist can do this. You can form an idea yourself with key criteria: Visual perception • Can they see similarities and differences between objects, match and sort them logically, and copy a pattern? • Can they tell left from right? • Can they draw a house or a person? Gross motor skills • Can they balance on one leg, kick a ball and climb? Fine motor skills • Can they grip a pencil properly? • Can they draw lines accurately, colour in and cut within borders? Emotional readiness • Can they accept separation from you? • Can they interact with other children, share and take turns? • Can they recognise and express feelings and needs? • Can they make independent decisions and follow them through? • Can they follow two or three instructions at once? • Can they concentrate on tasks? • Can they cope reasonably well with frustration?
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parenting
the blame game When things go wrong in the family, from divorce to death or abuse, children may blame themselves – with serious consequences.
PHOTOGRAPH: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM
w
hen seven-year-old Hayley stopped eating and started acting out at school, her mother attributed it to grief for her late grandmother. She was shaken when a therapist said it was more than that. “Hayley actually blamed herself for Nana’s death,” says the Pietermaritzburg hairdresser. “She was eaten by guilt, sure that if she’d remembered to water Nana’s pansies [a chore she’d neglected] and been a good girl, Nana wouldn’t have had a heart attack and died.” Many children blame themselves when those they love fall ill or die, fight or divorce, neglect them or even abuse them, and it can affect them years later as adults. “Young children, especially, don’t have access to the hard facts that we as adults
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Take steps to prevent it, writes GLYNIS HORNING. do, or are unable to grasp them entirely,” says Joburg clinical psychologist Liane Lurie. “The only tangible source they have is themselves, and so the cycle of selfblame begins.” A child’s world is centred on the stability of structures around them, Lurie says. “Adults are seen as omnipotent and as only good, so if something goes horribly wrong, the only reasonable explanation is to attribute it to themselves. Children are also often asked to behave better or be quieter in the face of a potential crisis, and are prone to interpret this as a message that the ensuing chaos is their fault,” she explains. Self-blame is fed by children being naturally self-centred. At this stage of their
development they believe that everything that happens to them is linked to them, and often believe that by thinking about or wishing for something, or by doing or not doing something, they can make things happen. If only they had watered the flowers, or not made Mom and Dad angry, or had been kinder or cleverer or somehow better, this would not have happened. Magical thinking, as it’s called, can sometimes offer a sense of control, which children crave. It’s frightening to deal with the reality of being powerless in the face of traumatic events, explains Joburg educational psychologist June Manala. So it’s preferable to believe that if they just try harder or become better, they can change things back – the dead person
may come back to life, or Mom and Dad may get together again. “This is necessary for psychological survival, but beyond a certain period the repercussions can be considerable,” she says.
“it’s not your fault” Self-blame can leave children weighed down by guilt for years, or wrapped in shame, preventing them from functioning fully and growing to their potential, Manala explains – more limiting self-beliefs are formed in childhood than at any other stage. They are also at risk of depression and anxiety disorders, and adolescents may attempt to escape in substance abuse and risky sexual, or other, behaviour (see “signs of self-blame in children” box).
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parenting
‘It’s not your fault’ is a powerful truth that children need to hear.
It’s essential to overcome self-blame in order to heal. And the best way a parent can help lift the burden is with the words “It’s not your fault”. “These four words are truly one of the most powerful gifts an adult can give a child,” says Sue Bohlin, contributing author to Marriage, Family and Sexuality (Kregel). “This is a powerful truth that children need to hear and they can’t tell themselves; only an adult can.” Be sure your body language reflects the words, adds Manala. “Younger children rely on nonverbal communication and can easily pick up inconsistencies, particularly in the facial expressions of adults.” If a child still doesn’t respond, get professional help. “They must feel they
are being taken seriously and that they are understood,” says Manala. Play therapy can help them express their feelings and resolve psychosocial challenges. Or cognitive behavioural therapy can show them how their thinking patterns are colouring their views, and teach them to examine their views more objectively, so they feel and cope better. Through therapy, Hayley has come to terms with her gran’s death, and accepted it wasn’t her fault. “We’ve planted more pansies for Nana,” says her mom. “But she knows it’s just a lovely way of helping keep our memories of Nana alive – nothing more.”
signs of self-blame in children • Acting out (from anger, fear or subconsciously seeking punishment because they feel guilty) • Withdrawing (from feeling overwhelmed, worthless, depressed) • Complaining of aches or pains • Change in sleep and eating patterns • Regressing (bed-wetting, thumb-sucking) • Dropping in school grades • Engaging in risk-taking and sexual behaviour • Using alcohol or drugs (to soothe uncomfortable emotions) • Self-harming (chewing fingers, pulling out hair, cutting themselves) Ask your doctor about counselling or contact Sadag: 0800 21 22 23 or sms 31393
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stopping self-blame Self-blame can play out differently depending on its source, and should be addressed preemptively if possible “so the child can get on with the business of being a child, unburdened by it,” says educational psychologist June Manala. “Provide children with as much information as possible about what is happening in age-appropriate terms,” adds clinical psychologist Liane Lurie. “Remember that a child’s imagination is vivid and will fill in any remaining gaps.” after divorce When parents divorce, a child’s world falls apart, with changes in their family structure and routine, and often in where they live and go to school. Self-blame thinking: “If I’d been a better person/behaved better, my dad or mom might still be here.” What you (and your ex) need to say: “It’s not your fault – it’s about us. We won’t be getting together again, but we both love you and will always be there for you.” Take care: “Avoid criticising each other in front of your child,” says Lurie. “Any
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conflict a child has about which parent to choose, or fear of displeasing the other, will create more self-blame.”
they may be more prone to open up if the setting is more relaxed and you gradually introduce potentially emotional topics.”
after illness or death When someone a child loves gets seriously ill or dies, it can be too difficult to understand and too painful to accept, as can the fear it may bring that others they love could also get ill or die. Self-blame thinking: “If I’d been a better person/behaved better, they might still be fine.” What you need to say: “Sometimes children think a sickness or death is their fault. Do you? It’s sad, but nothing you said or did made this happen. Are you frightened I may get sick or die too? Even if I did one day, you would be well cared for by X.” Take care: “Be careful of amplifying your child’s fears through incessant questioning,” says Lurie. “Introduce the topic and see what their questions are. Let them know that if there’s anything they’re worried about, you will always try to answer it as best you can. Remember that a child’s primary language may be play –
after physical or sexual abuse When a child is abused, especially by a family member or adult in a position of trust, they often find it easier to blame themselves. Self-blame thinking: “I must have made them want to do that to me; I let them do it. I must be wicked or worthless. If they’re sent away, it’s my fault for telling.” What you need to say: Sexual abuse can cause the most self-blame for numerous reasons, which you need to counter individually: • They may feel guilty that they didn’t fight: “It’s not your fault, you don’t yet have the mental or physical power of an adult – you could only do what you had to in order to survive.” • They let the abuse go on: “It’s not your fault; you were confused (or led on, threatened or scared).” • They were aroused: “It’s not your fault; touch can feel nice or exciting, and our bodies respond automatically.”
• They enjoyed feeling special: “It’s not your fault – you deserve to feel loved and special, but adults must do it in an appropriate way.” • They were told by the abuser it was their fault: “It’s not your fault. They said it because they knew what they were doing was wrong and they didn’t want you to tell on them.” • The abuser was sent away because the child told on them: “It’s not your fault. It was right to tell – they need help, and now they can get it.” • They have been abused before by different people: “It’s not your fault. People who do these things often pick on people who have been hurt before. I will see that you are safe. We will manage together.” Take care: “A child will be especially prone to self-blame if they’ve been told by the abuser to be silent about what transpired,” says Lurie. “This enhances their sense of shame. Self-blame is also amplified when there’s been no appropriate adult intervention to stop the abuse. The child begins to believe they were not good enough for anyone to rescue them.”
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book extract
keep it green In Star Fish, DAISY JONES uses only the top 10 most sustainable seafood off SASSI’s green list for her scrumptious recipes. Here is a delectable dish to enjoy with your family.
delhi kedgeree serves 4
ingredients • 4 eggs • 1 potato, cut into chunks • sea salt and freshly ground black pepper • 1 pack frozen haddock steaks • 2 bay leaves • 225ml long-grain or basmati rice • 125g unsalted butter • 1 medium onion, finely chopped • 1 clove freshly chopped garlic or
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1 tsp chopped garlic from a tub 2 heaped tsp curry powder 1 can brown lentils 2 lemons 2 good handfuls fresh coriander, roughly chopped
method Preheat the oven to 150°C, if you are planning to take a break between cooking and serving. Boil the eggs and potato chunks together, in salted boiling water. The eggs will be done after 6 to 8 minutes; the potato may need a little longer. When the eggs are done remove them from the pan with a slotted spoon and leave them in a bowl of cold water. When the potato is done, drain it. Put the haddock (defrosted or not) into a frying pan with some water and the bay leaves. Bring to the boil, cover and simmer for about 5 minutes, or until the fish is heated through. Remove from the pan and, when cool enough to handle, flake and set aside.
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4 5
Cook the basmati. It must rest for 5 minutes. Melt the butter in a pan over a low heat and add the onion and garlic. Allow to soften without colouring for about 5 minutes, then add the curry powder and cook for a couple of minutes more. Add the lentils, potato and juice of 1 lemon. Peel and cut the eggs into quarters. Add the rice mixture to the pan. If you are serving immediately, gently heat the mixture over a low heat, adding the egg and coriander towards the end – and being careful not to break the egg quarters. If you are taking a break now, before serving, put the fish and rice mixture in an ovenproof casserole dish, arrange the egg and coriander on top, and put the dish, covered, into the preheated oven. Serve with the second lemon, cut into wedges, creamy yoghurt and hot mango pickle or atchar.
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about the book In this fresh take on ocean-friendly fish, Daisy Jones gives us recipes that are simple, delicious and contemporary. This book is for those who want to eat more fish and want to do the right thing. There are family favourites and crowdpleasers featuring fresh fish and shellfish. Switching to green fish is an adventure. Star Fish (Quivertree Publications) is available in all good bookstores for R450.
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PHOTOGRAPH: Craig Fraser
• • • •
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December 2014 / January 2015
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education
checked off Use the holidays to prep for the frantic back-to-school period, armed with CHILD MAGAZINE’S helpful reminders for every stage of your child’s schooling.
routine and schedule • Start preparing for the new school year by getting your child back into the school-week routine. • Talk to your child about their first day. It is natural for children to experience separation anxiety and to shed a few tears at first. Let her know what to expect and reassure her that you will see her at the end of the day. • Find out who your child’s teacher will be and where the classroom is located. • Figure out how your child will get to school. Will you use a lift service or will either you or your partner be able to drop them off? • Come up with a short goodbye ritual – a high five or a quick hug. Routines
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are comforting and help your child to understand what is happening. Make sure you say goodbye. Don’t disappear when she’s distracted. You want your child to trust you and not think you’ll disappear every time she turns her back.
ready for school • If your child has any medical conditions or allergies, stock up on extra medication that the school may require in case of an emergency. • Check that you’ve bought all the necessary stationery and supplies. The school should have given you a list. • Mark everything. Use a laundry marker or order labels from a label company. • Ensure your child’s school bag is big enough and still in good condition.
• Some schools request that your child has a change of clothes available in the event of mishaps and a blanket or pillow for nap times. • Pack a hat and sunscreen. • Does your child have the right footwear? Consider getting your child to wear no-lace shoes that are easy to slip on and off. • Ensure that your child has suitable clothes for messy play. • Be considerate of the person changing your child’s nappies by opting for clothes that are easy to slip on and off.
play time
health checks for the new year • Get eyes tested, once your child can read or recognise letters. • Visit a dentist every six months. • Deworm your family at the beginning of the year and again after six months. • Check that immunisation cards are up to date. • Start your child on a multivitamin before school starts, to avoid the spread of germs. • Buy sunscreen and pack it in your child’s bag.
• You may need to arrange for aftercare or extramurals. Find out what the school’s operating hours are and note what activities they offer.
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PHOTOGRAPHS: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM
preschool
primary school
high school
routine and schedule
routine and schedule
• Before school starts, get your child into a good bedtime routine. • If your child’s schedule is going to be different next year, explain this to them ahead of time. Talk to your child about what to expect after school has finished, such as where to go for aftercare, who will be picking her up and when.
• Make sure your Grade 8 knows where and what time they need to meet on the first day for orientation. • Remind your child to check the procedure for ordering name badges and booking lockers, and be prepared to pay a fee.
• Stock up on project stuff, such as flip files, cardboard and coloured paper. • Buy everything to cover books. • Purchase plasters for blisters caused by new shoes. • A laminator is handy for lesson handouts and study material. • Keep a cupboard for spare stationery instead of sending all of your child’s stationery on the first day.
ready for school
play time
• Fit and buy school wear preferably only in January, to allow as much time as possible for growth spurts. • Take up hems to uniform standards. • Wash new school uniforms before your child wears them so the fabric is not hard. • Make sure your daughter has ample hair elastics that meet requirements, that your son’s hair is the right length, and that nails are short. Check the school’s ear piercings policy. • Let your teen pack deodorant. Buy antibacterial waterless soap for school bags. If girls have just started their menstrual cycle, remind them to always carry backup in their school bag. • Iron labels on uniforms, but these often have to be redone, so perhaps sew them in. It is recommended to buy a label printer for uniforms and stationery.
• Discuss what sports, activities and possible language electives are available. • Start a conversation with her about what to expect from initiation. • Buy your teen that new hockey stick; the gesture makes a special occasion of starting high school.
ready for school • If you need to visit the school stock shop, find out when they are open and schedule time early in the holidays. • Find out what school bags are acceptable or whether you have to buy bags from the school. Take into consideration how much your child will need to carry. Keep extramurals in mind. • Buy stationery, textbooks and exercise books early. Use contact to cover books and textbooks. • Label books and stationery, especially items such as pencil bags, scissors and calculators. • Label all clothing items – school uniforms, sports and PE gear, hats and shoes. If your child is attending
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aftercare, label these. Don’t buy or use new clothes for aftercare. • Make an appointment for a haircut just before school starts. Boys’ hair should be out of the eyes and off the collar. For girls, make sure clips or hairbands are the right colour. If hair is short, ensure it’s off the face.
play time • Does the school offer aftercare or do you need to pick up your child when school ends? For aftercare, find out what clothes and food is required and what’s provided. • If your child is required to do sport, get any uniform or equipment early on. • If extramurals are offered, discuss the options with your child and sign up early if you can. • Check in advance what sort of swimming ability the school requires of children. If necessary, send your child to swimming classes during the holidays.
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calendar
what’s on in december and january
You can also access the calendar online at
childmag.co.za
Your guide for what to do, where to go and who to see. Compiled by SIMONE JEFFERY
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FUN FOR CHILDREN – p26
ONLY FOR PARENTS – p28
Children’s rock climbing camp Five days of rock climbing, hiking, abseiling, rope swinging and more.
Kia 80s Rewind Festival Take a trip down memory lane and enjoy a night of neon outfits and big earrings.
bump, baby & tot in tow – p29
how to help – p29
Babynastics stimulation classes Babies learn through play during fun-filled activities.
Wetnose Animal Rescue Centre Take a tour of the shelter and spend some time with the rescued animals.
SPECIAL EVENTS – p25 Festive Fairy Garden Step into the fairy garden and have your face painted, enjoy a magic show and storytelling session, or write a letter to Father Christmas.
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PHOTOGRAPHS: shutterstock.com
fri
27 nov
SPECIAL EVENTS
december 2014 4 thursday Nedbank Golf Challenge Kamp Kwena hosts a children’s mini golf programme for 4–12 year olds during the tournament. Ends 7 December. Time: from 10am, comedians and bands perform every day from 4pm/5pm. Venue: Gary Player Country Club, Sun City. Cost: adults R80– R200, children 12–17 years old free–R100, children under 12 free. Book through Computicket: visit computicket.com Jacaranda FM carols by candlelight Sing your favourite Christmas carols with top SA artists such as Kurt Darren, Nianell, Jay and Connel Cruise. There is a children’s play
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MamaMagic – The Baby Expo An expo with the latest products and services for parents of 0–5 year olds as well as expert seminars and live entertainment for children. Ends 30 November. Time: 9am–6pm daily, Barney show: 10:30am and 3:30pm Thursday and Friday; 10:30am, 1pm and 3:30pm Saturday and Sunday. Venue: Coca-Cola Dome, North Riding. Cost: adults R70, children under 10 free (maximum 2 children free per adult). For more info: visit mamamagic.co.za
area. Take a picnic. Time: gates open 4pm, show starts 7pm. Venue: SuperSport Park, Centurion. Cost: free, but toy donations for the underprivileged welcome, songbook R10, candle R25, both for R30. For more info: visit jacarandafm.com
5 friday Emperors Palace Garden of Lights The Gardens of Vespasian are lit with fairy lights that take on the form of fantasy characters and festive shapes. Father Christmas is there until Christmas Day. In the event of rain the gardens are closed. Ends 4 January. Time: sunset–10pm. Venue: Emperors Palace, Kempton Park. Cost: free entry. Contact: 011 928 1000 or visit emperorspalace.com Gauteng Philharmonic Orchestra’s Christmas concert A compilation of carols and traditional Christmas music.
Also 7 December. Time: 8pm Friday, 3pm Sunday. Venue: Brooklyn Theatre, Greenlyn Village Centre, Menlo Park. Cost: R260– R300. Contact: 012 460 6033 or visit brooklyntheatre.co.za
6 saturday Christmas fairies They treat children to face painting, art and crafts activities, magic shows and more. Also 13, 16 and 20 December. Time: 10am–2pm. Venue: Atterbury Value Mart, 2001 Atterbury Rd, Faerie Glen. Cost: free. Contact: 012 991 4744 or visit atterburyvaluemart.co.za Cooper’s Cave Palaeoanthropologist Christine Steininger gives a fossil talk, and you can explore the cave and learn how to make stone tools. Booking essential. Time: 9am. Venue: Sterkfontein Caves, Cradle of Humankind. Cost: R150–R375, includes a light picnic lunch. Contact: 014 577 9000 or visit maropeng.co.za Dancing Divas Carnival Time for sequins, heels, carnival costumes and showing off. Time: 2:30pm–5:30pm. Venue: Wingate Country Club, Norval St, Moreleta Park. Cost: R35–R120. Contact: 082 460 7915 or visit dancingdivas.co.za Single parents Christmas social Children play and you can exchange gifts. Take your own food and beverages and a unisex children’s gift. Book by 3 December. Time: 1pm. Venue: Zita Park, Garsfontein. Cost: R5 entry. Contact: soloparenting@ talc.co.za or visit Facebook: Soloparenting
Train trip to Cullinan and back Take a wrapped, marked gift for your child for the Santa train. Booking essential. Santa train: 7, 14 and 16 December. Time: 8am–5:30pm. Venue: Hermanstad Railway Station, 152 Miechaelson St, Daspoort. Cost: R100–R200. Contact: 012 767 7913 or visit friendsoftherail.com Santa’s arrival parade Santa and his elves will be accompanied by buskers and drum majorettes as they make their way through the Mall. You will have an
Jakaranda Christmas Light Festival Houses at the Jakaranda Children’s Home have been festively decorated. There are street musicians, laser shows and more. Ends 31 December. Time: 6pm–10pm daily. Venue: 1 Talitha Kumi St, East Lynne. Cost: R10; R20 on concert nights. Contact: 012 800 4700 or visit jacarandachildren.co.za
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calendar opportunity to have your photo taken with Santa. Watch their website for details regarding the mall’s Candy Christmas with a Cherry On Top festive campaign that includes live entertainment, puppet shows, face painters, an art and crafts corner and more. Time: 10am–1pm. Venue: Mall @ Reds, cnr Rooihuiskraal and Hendrik Verwoerd Dr, Rooihuiskraal. Cost: photo costs vary. Contact: 012 656 8957 or visit mallatreds.co.za or Facebook: Mall at Reds
10am–4pm. Venue: Atterbury Value Mart, Faerie Glen. Cost: photo costs vary, gift wrapping R10. Contact: 012 991 4744 or visit atterburyvaluemart.co.za
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Pretoria Art Meander Explore art galleries and studios on the first Sunday of every month. Time: 10am–5pm. Venue: across Pretoria. Cost: free entry. Contact: 012 346 3100, artspta@mweb.co.za or visit artsassociationpta.co.za
Meet Buster die Brak Sing and dance along with Buster die Brak and Hanna Grobler. Also 19 December. Time: 10am. Venue: Kolonnade Retail Park, Montana Park. Cost: free. Contact: 012 548 0666 or visit kolonnaderetailpark.co.za Melrose House Antique Fair A fair with a host of antique and craft dealers selling their wares. The museum is open and free of charge. Time: 8am–4pm. Venue: Melrose House Museum, 275 Jacob Maré St. Cost: R10–R20 entry. Contact: 011 482 3266 or 082 883 4933
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january 2015
7 sunday
DStv Kids Xtravaganza Dora the Explorer and Spongebob Squarepants perform daily. Also enjoy the Fun Zone. Ends 15 December. Time: shows at 9:30am, 12:30pm and 3:30pm. Venue: Vodacom World, Midrand. Cost: R135, includes live shows and 90 minutes’ access to the Fun Zone. Book through Computicket: visit computicket. com or visit Facebook: DStv Kids Xtravaganza Festive Fairy Garden Children can have their faces painted, enjoy a magic show and storytelling sessions, write a letter to Father Christmas, and more. For children 3–12 years old. Ends 24 December. Time: 10am–4pm. Venue: Woodlands Boulevard, Woodlands. Cost: free entry. Contact: 012 997 9460 or visit woodlandsboulevard.co.za Tjiff and Tjaff concert With games, songs and surprises. The performance is in Afrikaans. Time: 11am. Venue: Sportsmans Court, Kolonnade Retail Park, Montana Park. Cost: free. Contact: 012 548 0666 or visit kolonnaderetailpark.co.za Titan the Robot The eight foot tall robot is performing for children 3 years and older. Time: 9am, 11am and 2pm. Venue: The Grove Mall, Pretoria East. Cost: free. Contact: 012 807 0963 or visit thegrovemall.co.za
15 monday Selfies with Santa Post a letter to Santa and have a photo taken with him. There are two gift-wrapping stations with proceeds going to charity. Ends 24 December. Time:
17 saturday Wag a Walk A fundraising walk for the Tshwane SPCA. There is a short, easy walk or a longer, slightly more strenuous walk. All ages. Time: 7am–9am. Venue: Smuts House, Smuts Ave, Irene. Cost: R20 per person, R10 per dog. Contact: 012 803 5219 or admin@spcapta.org.za
24 saturday Gymathstics open day A day full of Gymathstics activities and competitions. For 3–9 year olds. Time: 10am–4pm. Venue: Centurion. Cost: free. Contact: 076 342 2005 or visit gymathstics.co.za
25 sunday Me-Nuts Like2Bike fun cycling series There is a 2km, 5km and 12km cycle or a duathlon consisting of a 1km or 2km run followed by a 6km or 12km cycle. For 2–14 year olds. Time: starts 8:30am. Venue: The Big Red Barn, cnr Nelson St and Glen Rd, Sunlawns, Olifantsfontein. Cost: R120 preentry, R130 on the day. Contact: 083 326 6721 or visit like2bike.co.za
FUN FOR CHILDREN art, culture and science Gold Heritage Tour Suitable for 2 years and older. Closed 25 December. Time: tours at 9am, 10am, 11am, 2pm and
26 fri
Walt Disney Animation Studios’ Big Hero 6 (3-D) A heartfelt comedy adventure about a robotics prodigy who turns his brother and friends into a band of high-tech heroes who must save the day. Premieres 26 December in cinemas nationwide. For more info: visit disney.com/BigHero6
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11 and 12 December – Ditsong National Museum of Natural History holiday programme
3pm (closed Monday and Tuesday during government school terms). Venue: Gold Reef City Theme Park, Ormonde. Cost: from R165. Contact: 011 248 6896 or visit goldreefcity.co.za Tutankhamun – His Tomb and his Treasures The exhibition has faithfully reconstructed the tomb of Tutankhamun to scale. 2 December–1 March. Time: 9am–7pm Sunday–Thursday, 9am–9pm Friday, Saturday and on public holidays (closed on Christmas Day). Venue: Silverstar, Muldersdrift, Mogale City. Cost: adults R160, pensioners and students R120, children 6–18 years old R100, children under 5 years old free, family of four R440. For more info: visit tut-exhibition.co.za
classes, talks and workshops Chocolate Christmas workshop Create personalised Rice Krispies cakes, finger paint in chocolate, fashion a mini pizza with chocolate and decorate a premoulded Christmas tree. For 8–13 year olds. 5, 12 and 20 December. Time: 2pm–4pm Friday, 10am–12pm Saturday. Venue: Snyman Sjokolateur, Waterkloof Ridge. Cost: R135 per child per event. Contact: 012 347 8497 or visit snymanchocolates.com Sticky Fingers craft workshops Creative craft workshops for 5–13 year olds. 2–7 and 8–11 December. Time: Kamers vol Geskenke: 9am–5pm, Greenlyn Village: 10am–1pm. Venue: 2–7 December Kamers vol Geskenke, Open Window, Irene; 8–11 December Sticky Fingers-Creative Space, Greenlyn Village, Menlo Park. Cost: Kamers vol Geskenke R80–R200, Greenlyn Village R250 per day (sibling discount). Contact: 082 936 1677 or visit mystickyfingers.co.za
family outings Bells and whistles Stilt walkers, unicyclists, balloon modellers and carol singers entertain. 12–23 December; carol singers only on 17, 20 and 23 December. Time: 4:30pm–6:30pm; 14 and 21 December 1:30pm–3:30pm; 17, 20 and 23 December 5:30pm–6:30pm. Venue: Kolonnade Shopping Centre. Cost: free. Contact: 012 548 1902 or visit kolonnadecentre.co.za
holiday programmes Buzz Zone holiday school Children can take part in structured art and crafts activities and free play. Booking essential. 8–19 December and 5–13 January. Time: 7:15am–5:30pm. Venue: 916 Saint Bernard Dr, Garsfontein. Cost: daily rate: half-day magazine pretoria
R100, full day R120, weekly rate: half-day R400, full day R500. Contact: 012 993 0277, 071 569 5611 or visit thebuzzzone.co.za Casa Bambini holiday care Children of all ages are kept busy with crafts, swimming, an obstacle course, jumping castle, movies and more. Full-day and half-day options available. 11 December–13 January (closed 16, 23, 24, 25 and 26 December and 1 January). Time: 7am–5pm Monday–Saturday. Venue: 242 Lancia St, Lynnwood Ridge. Cost: R150, includes lunch and snacks. Contact: 061 200 1823 or visit casabambini.co.za Children’s rock climbing camp Children take part in fun activities such as rock climbing, hiking, abseiling, rope swinging, shelter building and more. Booking essential. For 8–12 year olds. 6–10 January. Time: 10am–6pm. Venue: Rocky Valley Christian Camp and Retreat Centre, Krugersdorp. Cost: R1 800; discounts for siblings. Contact: 083 669 3028 or info@ saclimbingacademy.co.za Ditsong National Museum of Natural History holiday programme Children take part in a wide range of activities including a visit to the Discovery centre, games and more. Booking essential. For 7–14 year olds. 11 and 12 December. Time: 9am–3pm. Venue: 432 Paul Kruger St, cnr Paul Kruger St and Visagie St, Pretoria. Cost: R50. Contact: 012 000 0040 or bongi@ditsong.org.za Drakensberg Adventure Camp Booking essential. For children 7–17 years old. 15–19 December. Time: tbc. Venue: departs from In the Forest, 2 Aloe Ridge Dr, Eikenhof. Cost: R3 850, including accommodation, meals and activities; transport R850. Contact: 076 575 8003, 076 035 4038, info@intheforest. co.za or visit intheforest.co.za Drama Dynamics holiday club Children create funny skits and play improvisation games. Booking essential. For children 8–18 years old. 11, 12 and 15 December. Time: 9am–3pm. Venue: Barnyard Theatre, Parkview Shopping Centre, Moreleta Park. Cost: R240 per day. Contact: 083 609 9679 or visit dramadynamics.co.za Esperanza holiday camp Children learn to ride properly and groom, clean and feed ponies. They also enjoy other activities. For children 5–16 years old. 8–12 and 15–19 December. Time: 8am–4:30pm. Venue: Esperanza Riding School, plot 588 Mooiplaats, Pretoria East. Cost: R250 per day, includes lunch. Contact: 076 184 5660 or esperanzaholidaycamp@gmail.com Expressions holiday camp Outdoor play and games, art and crafts, yoga, December 2014 / January 2015
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calendar cooking and baking, gardening and more. Booking essential. For children 3½ years and older. 4–12 December. Time: 8:30am–4:30pm. Venue: Expressions Centre, Norfolk Rd, Carlswald, Midrand. Cost: varies. Contact: 083 791 6674, 082 402 8169 or visit expressionsinfocus.co.za FlipFlop Gymnastics holiday camp Children do treasure hunts, nature walks, baking activities, campfire tales and more. Space is limited. 10–13 December. Time: 3pm. Venue: Hartbeespoort Holiday Resort. Cost: R1 870, includes transport, accommodation, meals and activities. Contact: 072 238 7342 or visit flipflopgym.co.za Kamp Kwena Kids Club Activities, outings and games to keep 2–12 year olds busy. 8 December–11 January. 25 December: Christmas parade and foam party; 31 December: New Year’s Eve party for 6–12 year olds. Time: 2–3 year olds 9am–1pm; 4–12 year olds 9am–5pm; evening session for 5–12 year olds 7pm–9:30pm; Christmas Day party 9am–1pm; New Year’s Eve 7pm–10pm. Venue: Kamp Kwena Facility, Sun City. Cost: from R95. Contact: 014 557 4136 or 014 557 5980 Sugar Bay holiday camp Themed camps with over 100 activities to choose from. For 7–17 year olds. 6–13 December: The Seven Wonders of the World; 13–23 December: Toy Story; 27 December– 6 January: Dr Who; 6–11 January: Fizzy. Time: varies. Venue: Sugar Bay Resort, Zinkwazi Beach, KwaZulu-Natal North Coast. Cost: confirmed on booking. Contact: 032 485 3778 or visit sugarbay.co.za
markets Brooklyn Design Fair A monthly fair featuring local food and contemporary design. Enjoy lunch at one of the tables and the live music. FanFairyTastic is offering crafts and face painting. 5 December. Time: 4pm–9pm. Venue: Brooklyn Square, New Muckleneuk. Cost: free entry. For more info: visit brooklyndesignfair.co.za Elno Art Market The market has stalls selling handmade crafts and food. 6 and 7 December. Time: 9am–4pm Saturday, 9am–2:30pm Sunday. Venue: 300 Gouws St, Wierda Park. Cost: free entry. Contact: 082 325 4296 or acasacenturion@gmail.com Hazel Food day and night market For fresh fruit and veggies, tarts and deli-style
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December 2014 / January 2015
13 sat
Nickel Xmas Market There is a tea garden and a play area. 29 November– 16 December. Time: 9am–6pm daily. Venue: Paul Jungnickel Home, plot 214, Lynnwood Rd, Zwavelpoort. Cost: free entry. Contact: 012 940 0221 or visit kwo.org.za
on stage and screen
Bieber and Buddies – Never say Never The Kidz Rock Band perform hits by Justin Bieber, One Direction, Miley Cyrus, Katy Perry and Selena Gomez. 13 and 18 December. Time: 11am Thursday, 2pm Saturday. Venue: Barnyard Theatre Parkview, Parkview Shopping Centre, Moreleta Park. Cost: R90. Contact: 012 368 1555 or visit barnyardtheatres.co.za
products. 6 December. Time: 5pm–9pm. Venue: Greenlyn Village Centre, Menlo Park. Cost: free entry. Contact: 083 554 5636 or visit hazelfoodmarket.co.za Irene Village Market With numerous stalls selling clothing, delicacies, antiques, flowers, antiques and collectables. 6, 13 and 16 December. Time: 9am–2pm. Venue: Irene Village Market, Smuts House Museum, Irene. Cost: free entry. Contact: 012 667 1659 or visit irenemarket.co.za Kamersvol Geskenke A pop-up market with food, wine, live music and handcrafted products. 2–7 December. Time: 9am–5pm Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Saturday, 9am–7pm Friday, 9am–3pm Sunday. Venue: Open Window School of Communication, Irene. Cost: online R50–R60, at the door R75. For more info: visit kamersvol.com Market @ The Collection An evening market with live music, food, art and crafts stalls and entertainment for the children. Closed 14 December–7 January. Time: 4pm–8pm every Friday. Venue: The Collection, Garsfontein Rd. Cost: adults R20, children free. Contact: 012 993 3638 or visit thecollection.co.za
Children’s Theatre: Stinkryk and Brandarm Liefde Meet Suikerbossie, the poor tooth mouse and Klaas Padda, the cheese maker, Vuurvliegie and Mevrou Dominees. The production is in Afrikaans. Suitable for children 3 years and older. 6, 11, 12 and 13 December. Time: 11am–12pm; 6 December 11am–12pm and 1pm–2pm. Venue: Asbos Theatre, cnr Albeth St, Die Wilgers. Cost: R50. Contact: 082 564 0999 or visit tickets.tixsa.co.za Janice Honeyman’s Peter Pan Wellknown characters fill the stage in this lavishly designed, over-the-top panto with plenty of surprises and thrills. 5 November– 28 December. Time: varies. Venue: Joburg Theatre, 163 Civic Boulevard, Braamfontein. Cost: R145–R260. Book through the theatre: 0861 670 670 or visit joburgtheatre.com Penguins of Madagascar 3-D The penguins are back in their very own feature film. This 3-D comedy adventure features the voices of John Malkovich and others. Premieres 5 December in cinemas nationwide. For more info: visit sterkinekor. com or numetro.co.za The Little Mermaid An enchanting tale about a vibrant little mermaid and her adventures. 28 November–13 December. Time: varies. Venue: Irene Village Theatre, 1 Pioneer Rd, Irene. Cost: R75–R95. Book through Computicket: 0861 915 8000 or visit pytheatre.co.za The Three Little Pigs A pantomime with a few twists in the tale. Tickets are available at the door. 10, 11, 12 and 14 December. Time: 10am and 2pm Wednesday and Thursday, 10am, 2pm and 7pm Friday, 11am, 3pm and 7pm Sunday. Venue: Gem Village Hall, Jan Smuts Rd, Irene. Cost: R40–R60. Contact: cpritchard@lantic.net
sport and physical activities Little Kickers For boys and girls 18 months–8 years old. Starts 10 January. Time: 9am–11am every Saturday. Venues: Club Sport Maritimo, cnr Richard St and Park St,
11 December – Die Blou Hond
Hatfield, and Sport Park, Kruger St, Lyttleton, Centurion. Cost: R998 for 12 weeks. Contact: 072 222 4147 or visit littlekickers.co.za Magalies Canopy Tour A two-and-ahalf hour tour over the canopy of the Ysterhout Kloof. For children 7 years and older. Time: 7am–5pm daily. Venue: Sparkling Waters Hotel and Spa, Rustenburg. Cost: R495. Contact: 014 535 0150 or visit magaliescanopytour.co.za
only for parents classes, talks and workshops Ludwig’s walk and talk An informative talk on roses and a walk through selected varieties. 16 December. Time: 9:30am. Venue: Ludwig’s Roses, 61 Haakdoornlaagte, Wallmansthal. Cost: free. Contact: 012 544 0144 or visit ludwigsroses.co.za Make life easier Discover and learn to empower yourself as a parent and influence the lives of your children. 2 December. Time: 9:30am–12:30pm. Venue: Alberton Teachers Centre, cnr Hendrik Potgieter Rd and 1st Ave, Alberton. Cost: R450 per person, R700 per couple. Contact: 082 397 3606 or visit sensoryintelligence.co.za
on stage and screen Die Blou Hond Enjoy dinner and a show at Casa Toscana. 4 December: Christmas with Kevin Leo; 11 December: Corlea. Time: 6pm–11pm. Venue: 5 Darlington Rd, Lynnwood Manor. Cost: R290. Contact: 012 348 8820 or visit casatoscana.co.za Kia 80s Rewind Festival Revellers can take a trip down memory lane and enjoy a night of neon outfits and big earrings. The lineup includes Billy Ocean, Heather
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Small (from M People), Nik Kershaw, Go West, Wang Chung and Blancmange. 31 January. Time: 4pm. Venue: Festival Lawns at Carnival City, Brakpan. Cost: R390. Book through Computicket: 0861 915 8000 or visit computicket.com or rewindfestival.co.za Men, Women and Children A comedy drama that follows the story of a group of high school teenagers and their parents as they attempt to navigate the many ways the internet has changed their lives. Premieres 16 January. Cost: varies. For more info: visit sterkinekor.com or numetro.co.za
out and about Rose Garden Tour Hop on the bus for a tour of a few selected rose gardens in Joburg and Pretoria. 6 December. Time: 8:30am. Venue: Ludwig’s Roses, 61 Haakdoornlaagte, Wallmansthal. Cost: R330, includes a picnic lunch. Contact: 012 544 0144 or visit ludwigsroses.co.za
bump, baby & Tot in tow
classes, talks and workshops BabyGym with Christine A five-week course will teach you techniques to stimulate your baby’s senses, brain and muscles. Booking essential. Suitable for babies from birth–1 year old. Starts 9 and 10 January. Time: 10am–12pm every Friday or Saturday. Venue: Empowering Mothers, 366 Snowy Walker St, Garsfontein, Pretoria East. Cost: R790. Contact: 084 220 0548 or visit empoweringmothers.co.za
events all over The Color Run Run, jog or walk along the 5km route that has colourblasting stations at each kilometre mark. The race ends with a colourthrowing party where runners and spectators get to make the world a more vibrant place while dancing to their favourite music. 16 December: Mossel Bay, 21 December: Plettenberg Bay, 27 December: Hermanus, 10 January: Ballito. Times and costs vary. For more info: visit thecolorrun.co.za
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Babynastics stimulation classes A stimulation programme for babies 2–12 months old. Time: 3–6 months old 10:30am–11:30am; 6–9 months old 1pm–2pm; 9–12 months old 2:30pm–3:30pm, every Monday. Venue: Parentwood Baby and Family Wellness Centre, 103 North St, Rietondale. Cost: first class free, R80 per class. Contact: 072 787 0608 or visit babynastics.co.za
playtime and story time Jump, jive and jam Instrument play, moving, singing and stories. Booking essential. For 1–7 year olds. 6 December. Time: 9am–10am. Venue: Move-It Meerkats at Dipsy Dots, 54 Henri Rd, Eldoraigne. Cost: R30 per child. Contact: 083 400 8802 or visit kindermusikmeerkats.co.za
how to help Wetnose Animal Rescue Centre An animal shelter that rescues, rehabilitates and re-homes abandoned and neglected animals. Take a tour of the premises. Those over 16 can register as volunteers and then walk the dogs. Children under the age of 16 need to be accompanied by an adult. Horse grooming also possible. Donations of dog food welcome. SMS the word “nose” to 40131 to donate R20. Time: 8am–4:30pm Monday–Friday, 9am–2pm Saturday. Closed on Sundays and public holidays. Venue: plot 75, Vaalbank, Bronkhorstspruit. Contact: 013 932 3941 or visit wetnose.org.za
if you’re visiting durban 5 december–11 january Aladdin A family pantomime, which features popular songs, jokes, costumes and amazing sets, from the Cave of Wonders to a golden Chinese palace. Time: varies. Venue: Elizabeth Sneddon Theatre, UKZN, Glenwood. Cost: R130–R210. Book through Computicket: 0861 915 8000 or visit computicket.com
13–23 december Umhlanga Summer Festival Daily exercise classes, face painting, beach Olympics, beach volleyball, musical towels, tug-of-war, a promenade walk and more. The Lizzard Summer Surf Event, 13 and 14 December, is for novice surfers from 6 years old to masters over 50. A trail run takes place on 14 December. Time: varies. Venue: Umhlanga, North Coast. Cost: varies. Contact Umhlanga Tourism: 031 561 4257 or visit umhlangafestivals.co.za
16 december Shongweni Farmers and Craft annual Christmas market Enjoy a day of wonderful food, fun and live music by The Kickstands, along with a festive showcase of handcrafted items. Time: 9am–4pm. Venue: 1 Fraser Rd, Assagay. Cost: free entry. Contact: info@shongwenimarket.co.za or visit shongwenimarket.co.za
if you’re visiting cape town 12 december–28 february The Art of the Brick Lego exhibit See up to 70 art sculptures on display, created from more than a million Lego bricks by US artist Nathan Sawaya. Time: 9am. Venue: Watershed Exhibition Centre, V&A Waterfront. Cost: adults R140 and children R95, entry for under 2 year olds free. For more info: visit theartofthebricksa.co.za
7 december and 25 january Val de Vie market with polo This monthly Sunday market allows you to browse everything from food and wine to clothing and jewellery stalls. You can also enjoy a polo match. Entertainment for children varies each month. Time: 10am–3pm. Venue: Val de Vie Wine Estate, Paarl-Franschhoek Valley. Cost: free. Contact: 021 863 6100 or visit valdevie.co.za
19 december–10 january Cinderella Featuring the outrageous Ugly Sisters and the caring Fairy Godmother, this is classical ballet at its humorous best. Time: 7pm. Venue: Artscape Theatre. Cost: R50–R150. Contact: 021 421 7695 or visit artscape.co.za
don’t miss out! For a free listing, email your event to pretoria@childmag.co.za or fax it to 011 234 4971. Information must be received by 6 January for the February issue, and must include all relevant details. No guarantee can be given that it will be published. To post an event online, visit childmag.co.za
December 2014 / January 2015
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finishing touch
wild things CASSANDRA SHAW recalls her carefree childhood and hopes that her son also gets to develop a sense of wonder for nature.
i
had a big backyard when I was a child, where I often climbed trees. I also caught bugs in jars, ate wild flowers and spent a lot of time beachcombing. In most of my early photos I looked like a carefree child with wild, sun-kissed hair and a fine layer of dirt coating my skin. In comparison to my son, our early years couldn’t be further apart. He lives in a flat and his backyard consists of a fake section of grass that lines the base of our balcony. There’s nothing wrong with being a city boy, but it’s very obvious where he comes from whenever we take him out into the country. For starters, he’s like a child in a sweet shop. There is endless space for him to explore and be as noisy as he likes. He loves it! But there are other times when the elements are just too much for him, like
when he insists on wearing snow boots in 27 degree weather and being carried by his dad because he keeps getting sand in his shoes. The most distinguishing characteristic though is how he reacts to the unexpected. We recently went away for a weekend
he was quite nervous being around these gigantic, prehistoric-looking birds strutting their stuff. Surprisingly, though, he had no problem when it came time to feed a couple of cheetahs their breakfast and dinner... sure, they were in captivity, but it made me think there was hope for him yet.
There is endless space for him to explore and be as noisy as he likes. He loves it! to the Klein Karoo, and one morning he called out for us, slightly panicked, when a large fly landed in front of him – he thought it was a bee coming to sting him. And when we were out for a walk and were followed by a couple of ostriches in heat who decided to perform for my husband,
I was definitely more scared in that instant than he was. I suppose that exposure to such things is the main way for children to become more adjusted and well-rounded. With exposure I’ve certainly become more “citified” over the years – perhaps a little
too much, especially since moving to South Africa. In my defence though I think living in a place where you haven’t grown up knowing what all of the plants, animals and bugs are capable of, can put you a bit on edge – especially when it comes to your children and their interaction with them. Perhaps we both need to explore the countryside a bit more and see what’s out there. I’m pretty sure my son would be up for it, but I think the retired tomboy I am, is more nervous of the prospect than he is. Cassandra has enjoyed sharing the Shaw clan’s stories and experiences with you this past year. She and her family wish you and your families a very happy holiday season and an eventful New Year filled with fun and memorable stories of your own.
family marketplace
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December 2014 / January 2015
magazine pretoria
PHOTOGRAPH: MENKE BONNEMA
Cassandra and her son
it’s party time For more help planning your child’s party visit
childmag.co.za/resources/birthday-parties