Thursday, Februrary 14, 2019
SINGLE ON VALENTINE’S DAY? WHAT TO DO — Page 4
MEALS FOR THE SINGLE PERSON — Page 5
MESSY BREAKUPS — Page 6
HOW TO TURN DOWN A DATE — Page 7
TURN TO SANDSTONE’S AWARD-WINNING STONE CARVER WHITE WHISKEY — Page 8
THE ANTI-VALENTINE’S DAY ISSUE
2 • LEWIS COUNTY WEEKENDER • The Chronicle, Centralia/Chehalis, WA. Thursday, Februrary 14, 2019
CALENDAR OF EVENTS
FEB. 14-24 THROUGH FEB. 24
The Evergreen Playhouse in Centralia presents “Blithe Spirit,” a smash comedy hit of the London and Broadway stages. This muchrevived classic from the playwright of Private Lives offers up fussy, cantankerous novelist Charles Condomine, remarried but haunted (literally) by the ghost of his late first wife, the clever and insistent Elvira who is called up by a visiting “happy medium,” one Madame Arcati. As the (worldly and un-) personalities clash, Charles’ current wife, Ruth, is accidentally killed, “passes over,” joins Elvira, and the two “blithe spirits” haunt the hapless Charles into perpetuity. Performances are Fridays through Sundays, with a pay-what-you-can show on Thursday, Feb. 14. For dates and times, costs and other information, call 360.736.8628.
THURSDAY, FEB. 14 Chris Guenther will play his
RANDY OXFORD
tap into the scene
American roots music at Willapa Hills Farm with all proceeds to benefit the FFA Chapter of W.F. West High School. Doors open at 6, with the music from 6:30 to 8:30 p.m. Cost is $15 general admission, $10 youth under 18, and kids under 5 free. Willapa Hills Farm is located at 4680 state Route 6, 20 miles west of I-5 Exit 77.
FEB. 15, 16 AND 23
The play Pride & Prejudice is coming to the Dessert Theatre at the Roxy Theater in Morton. Friday, Feb. 15 is a pay-what-you-can preview starting at 7 p.m. Saturdays, Feb. 16 and Feb. 23, will host two shows at 2 and 7 p.m. Cost is $20 at the door, and includes dessert and hot beverage service. Info: mortonroxy.org.
FRIDAY, FEB. 15
The new Chehalis bar McFiler’s is hosting a live acoustic performance Chehalis’ own Ben Bange. The show with Lesli Sanders of Prophets starts at 9 p.m. McFiler’s is located of Addiction. Also performing is at 543 NW Pacific Ave., Chehalis.
Band, Johnny Ray ( tribute to Stevie Ray Vaughan ) and solo artists such as Brian Mittge. Musicians from as far away as Palm Springs and Sacramento, California, Vancouver SATURDAY, FEB. 16 B.C. and throughout Washington The Paradise Fire-Aid Super Jam state will be volunteering for this NW will take over the Southwest spectacular event. Sound and lights Washington Fairgrounds from on the two stages will be provided noon to 10 p.m., featuring nonstop music by 15 bands. Cost is $10 by Jeff Anderson of Pleasant Hill Studios in Chehalis and Cary per person. Food vendors will be present. Participants are encouraged Wakeley of WAVS Studio, Centralia. From 9-10 p.m. there will be the to bring folding chairs. Some of the unprecedented “Super Jam Grand top award-winning talents such as Finale “ where up to 100 musicians Randy Oxford and the Linda Myers Band will share the two-stage event of all styles will jam together. All proceeds for this event will be with local bands including Backfire donated directly to the North Valley Band, Rock City, Sweet Bay Blues, Bruce Maier Band, Christine Ritchey SEE PAGE 3.....................................
LEWIS COUNTY WEEKENDER • The Chronicle, Centralia/Chehalis, WA. Thursday, Februrary 14, 2019 • 3
Upcoming Issues
FEB
DEATH BY OVERKILL
Community Foundation in Chico, California where they have operated for over 30 years as a nonprofit. Mo Tilly will play classic rock music at The Chehalis Theater starting at 8 p.m. Info: 360.557.3946. The Chehalis Wedding Show, called the wedding event of 2019, takes place 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. at City Farm, 452 N Market Blvd., Chehalis. Admission is $5 per bridal party.
SUNDAY, FEB. 17
Death by Overkill will play Flood Valley Brewery in Chehalis 5 to 6 p.m. The venue is located at 289 NW Chehalis Ave., Chehalis. Death by Overkill is a supergroup on a West Coast tour from Seattle with member of The Adarna, Furniture Girls, Tokyoidaho, VoyagerOne and the Highsteppers.
SATURDAY, FEB. 23 Under the Streetlamp plays
u’re Reading It Issue 14th SingleYoAwareness
21st The Gun Issue the Lucky Eagle Casino with doors opening at 7 p.m. and the show starting at 8 p.m. This is an electrifying evening of classic hits performed by a quartet of amazing Broadway vocalists. Tickets start at $25 for Star Players at the Lucky Star Rewards Center. Tickets also available for sale by phone at 800.720.1788. This can’t miss concert Includes Doo-wop, Motown, old time rock ‘n’ roll and all of your favorite songs from The Drifters, The Beach Boys, The Beatles, and a show-stopping salute to Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons.
28th The Pet Issue
MAR
7th
Women In Power
14th St. Patrick’s Day 21st Spring into the Outdoors 28th April Fool’s Day
APR
4th
Gone Fishing
11th TBD 18th 4/20 (heh heh)
FRIDAY, FEB. 22
Aaron DOGBITE Harris and special guests The Stoned Evergreen Travelers will play Flood Valley Brewery in Chehalis starting at 9 p.m. The venue is located at 289 NW Chehalis Ave., Chehalis.
s Valentine’s Issue Last Week’s New
ON THE COVER
The Chronicle’s own couple Matt Baide (our sports editor) and Hunter Weeks (our corporate inserts manager) pretend the romance isn’t going all that well as part of our Anti-Valentine’s Day Issue. Photo by Jared Wenzelburger.
25th TBD
Contact Lindy Waring lwaring@chronline.com • 360.807.8219 321 N. Pearl St., Centralia, WA 98531
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FROM PAGE 2. . ...........................
7th
4 • LEWIS COUNTY WEEKENDER • The Chronicle, Centralia/Chehalis, WA. Thursday, Februrary 14, 2019
Going It Alone on Valentine’s Day How to Get Through the Celebrations If You Are Single
Valentine’s Day frequently serves as a reminder to those who aren’t in relationships that, well, they’re not in relationships. For those who want to be dating or married, it can be a difficult day. If you want to keep it simple, treat it like any mid-February day and don’t worry about celebrating. If you want to celebrate, make it fun.
Spend the Evening With Snacks and TV Binge-watch your favorite comedy series, go a little dark and watch “Law & Order,” or watch movies. You can go all in and watch the cheesiest romance streaming services have to offer or go in a different direction entirely, watching old westerns, horror or action movies. Have a celebrity crush? Look them up and watch movies starring that person.
Cook a Fancy Meal
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Who says you can’t cook a threecourse meal for yourself? Make the recipes you’ve been thinking about cooking but never had time or energy to — cook a nice steak or lobster and make a rich chocolate cake. Decorate the table, use your best dishes, drink from a goblet or wine glass. Or, if you’re not much into cooking, order food or pick up
from your favorite restaurant and treat yourself at home.
Buy Yourself a Gift Valentine’s Day is a great time to buy a new kitchen accessory, a piece of jewelry or clothing, a new book or something else you’ve had your eye on. Buy yourself a box of chocolates (get it personalized, so you get all your favorites and none of the chocolates you try to avoid) or even a bouquet of flowers to brighten up your home or office.
Have an Anti-Valentine’s Day Party You can call it an anti-Valentine’s Day party, decorate with broken hearts and black decorations, making it as unromantic as possible. Or keep it theme-free and just get together with friends — eat, drink, play games, and if you have a friend with a dog, have them bring Fido, because nothing makes a party more fun than a dog.
LEWIS COUNTY WEEKENDER • The Chronicle, Centralia/Chehalis, WA. Thursday, Februrary 14, 2019 • 5
Celebrate the Joys of Dining Alone Eating by Yourself on Valentine’s Day Rules (Kind of)
First, I hate cold or reheated mac & cheese, so I always have to eat all of it in one sitting. No excuses. Already, it’s the perfect guilty pleasure for one. Second, there is absolutely nothing romantic about that fake cheese By Claire Lowera packet stuff that comes with easy SKILLET.COM mac. It’s a mess. It tastes delicious. It makes you feel like you’re three years During this first half of February, old when you’re stirring it in to your food-focused sites are awash in butter-and-milk-drenched noodles. romantic meals for two but, in a lot of Third, haters gonna hate, and I bet ways, eating with another person is there are plenty of people out there overrated. who would judge a 34-year-old man Not only do you have to worry for surrendering to the most basic about stuff in your teeth, but you of palates every now and then. So, have to predict how the meal is going I do that in my personal time and to make you feel (or smell). It’s a little leave the fancier dining for dates. exhausting, which is why eating alone Anyone up for some Olive Garden on Valentine’s Day actually kind of breadsticks? My treat. — David Murphy, senior tech editor rules. Not only are you free to craft a meal to your exact specifications, Stacks (of Cheese) on Stacks you can use and abuse the discounts (of Other Things) and deals on wine, steak, lobster, My go-to single-gal-at-home meal and any other “amorous” foods is variations of “things on top of other that happen to be on sale. (Get things.” In lieu of deciding or trying to chocolate the day after, however. make something look nice, I get out The day-after chocolate sale cannot some bread or crackers along with be beat.) I believe that everyone has just about everything in my fridge I a collection of food things they’d might want — pickled veggies, good rather enjoy away from prying eyes, olives, hummus, cheese, meats, and we’ve rounded up ours to share avocado, whatever else I might want with you. The following advice is from to spread on a carb base and snack members of the www.skillet.com on. From there I can graze however I team. want to, without having to make my little forest of jars and containers on Many Bags of Popcorn the table look presentable. Also, I love My preferred single meal isn’t so a solo cheese and cracker plate. I like much a “meal” as a bag (or two) some pretty smelly cheeses, and also of microwave popcorn with garlic generally want all of them for myself, powder and parmesan cheese so it’s a meal best consumed alone. thrown in. Yes, out of the bag, — Virginia K. Smith, managing obviously, so that I can lick the butter editor off of my hands when I’m done. Dessert! A Garlicky Steak Dinner — Alicia Adamczyk, personal Though I love a meal of cheese finance writer and all the pickled things, if I truly
Kraft Dinner
My ideal eating alone meal is Kraft Mac & Cheese for a few key reasons.
want to celebrate the joys of being alone, I treat myself to a retro-inspired steak dinner. I get a very large rib eye, baste it in butter, and serve it
www.skillet.com
A fine cut of beet turned into a garlicy steak dinner is a fine way to spend Valentine’s Day dinner by yourself.
with a wedge salad (with lots of red onion), a loaded baked potato, and a whole head of roasted garlic for mashing into the potato and onto the steak. Buying a steak for one means you can buy a more expensive steak, eat it all, and not worry about being too full (or too garlicky) for other, partnered activities. Oh, and I usually enjoy a bottle of wine by myself. — Claire Lower, food and beverage editor
Extreme Buttered Noodles
My solo meal of choice is buttered noodles with cottage cheese. I got sad just typing that. It’s what I ate as a child — it’s possible that I refused to eat anything except for this, with the occasional hot dog — and it remains satiating and soothing. I will not suggest a TINY BIT of ketchup because that would be GROSS! I also identify very deeply with David’s mac & cheese description, except for the part about being a 34-year-old man. — Melissa Kirsch, editor-in-chief
Smelly Fish
My wife and I eat pretty much anything in front of each other, but she cannot abide me cooking salmon in the house. Tilapia gets a pass, but salmon fills the place with its fishy stench ‘til morning. So it’s my secret single meal to cook when she’s out of town. I even have to take the trash out before she gets back. — Nick Douglas, staff writer
Messy Wings
I have a lot of preferred single meals, but my favorite is probably getting a table for one at this Korean chicken wing place. I order a 12-piece meal. It’s VERY hard to eat daintily and my hands look like I escaped a crime scene. I will never take my partner there if I want to retain any attractive qualities — Josh Ocampo, staff writer
Taco Bell
Taco Bell, by myself. I’m not ashamed that a Quesarito is my comfort food, but I know better than to expect others to feel the same. — Beth Skwarecki, health editor
Forbidden Thai Food
My single person meal is Pad See Ew because my Filipino boyfriend resents the popularity Thai food has in America, so when he’s gone I take the opportunity to order some spicy Thai noodles. — Joel Kahn, senior video producer
More Kraft, Plus Anchovy Pizza
Shitty Kraft-style mac & cheese. My boyfriend is VEHEMENTLY OPPOSED to orange Mac. I’m especially fond of the Aldi CHEESE CLUB. Anchovy pizza is up there. I converted my ex to the anchovy pizza lifestyle but my current partner is holding fast. It turns out that when you grow up on a boat and eat only the freshest, most recently dead fish, anything less is pretty unpalatable. — A.A. Newton, Skillet contributer
6 • LEWIS COUNTY WEEKENDER • The Chronicle, Centralia/Chehalis, WA. Thursday, Februrary 14, 2019
What’s the Messiest Time You’ve Been Broken Up With? It Is Better to Have Loved and Lost, Then to Never Have Loved at All — Or Is It? By Alicia Adamczyk
LIFEHACKER.COM
Today’s Feb. 14, a day for love, sex before dinner, paper hearts and fondue for two. It’s a day to rush to Hallmark after work, because you forgot to get your girlfriend a card again, and it’s a day to commiserate with friends over your perpetual singledom. Perhaps it’s a day you just ignore. For some, it’s a day of heartbreak and bitterness, particularly if you’re getting over a recent breakup. As far as getting dumped goes, I don’t have any particularly juicy stories. I was broken up with over the phone, which shouldn’t be allowed after high school but here we are, and I’ve been ghosted a few times since. I’ve also done a fair amount of ghosting myself, I’m somewhat ashamed to say. Other budding relationships have simply fizzled out, more with a whimper than a bang (or rather, a text message not responded to. So many texts not responded to). What about you? What was the messiest time you were broken up with? On your birthday? On Valentine’s Day?
Tomorrow, treat yourself to some 50 percent off candy from area outlets, the holiday’s best deal. Happy Valentine’s Day!
Here’s the Best of the Worst from Twitter followers of Lifehacker.com: I went out with friends for my birthday. I’d also been recently released from the hospital for a bout of appendicitis and was waiting for my surgery. My girlfriend at the time was quiet and distant most of the night, but I chalked it up to here not feeling social — she didn’t much like going out. As we were walking home, she dumped me. Because I hadn’t had my appendix removed yet. We patched things up, but the final break-up was because her friend’s dog barked at me. It was not a good relationship. I had a long distance relationship with this girl for a little over a year. We talked on the phone regularly and one particular night, I could tell something was up. I asked her what was wrong but she wouldn’t tell me. Finally, I asked her if she wanted to “take a break,” which, for me, meant “spend some time apart and reassess.” But for her it meant “break up” and she jumped on the idea. But, she asked if I still wanted to go out for my birthday, which was
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coming up. She had bought Cirque du Soleil tickets for the performance on my birthday. Of course, I said no. Just kidding! Like a jerk, I said yes. So I spent my birthday with someone who made me ask her if she wanted to break up with me and didn’t want to waste Cirque du Soleil tickets because she couldn’t get anyone else to go with her on short notice. It was a miserable birthday in a long line of miserable birthdays, which is why I don’t celebrate my birthday any more. I had a boyfriend for 13 years. I was five months pregnant with our third child and he dumped me on Google hangouts. While I was at work. So that was fun. I was broken up with on Valentine’s Day out of the blue two years ago. Honestly, I’m not over it. In October of last year, I ended things with my boyfriend of five years. We lived together in my house so when I broke up with him, I told him he needed to move out. He didn’t end up moving out for three more months. So for three months I lived with my ex in what was the most awkward, passive aggressive angry time of my life. I ended up in a relationship with my roommate and after about a year together she started seeing other people and waited two weeks after sleeping with someone else to bother talking to me about it to tell me it was over. It took her another four months to move out for which she didn’t pay her half of the rent because she couldn’t afford to pay it and move.
She didn’t clean up after her cats at all when she left (or really most of the time she lived there) so it took me weeks before I stopped finding tumbleweeds of cat hair and kitty litter all over the apartment. High school sweetheart. Two and a half years (which, in high school, is pretty significant). We both started different college programs in the same city. She came over one night, slept with me, then called me the next night to tell me that she was really interested in someone else that she’d met in her program but didn’t want to technically cheat. … The happy ending for me is I ended up meeting someone in my program who became best friends with me almost immediately after we started chatting. 18-plus years, marriage and two kids later, I always joke that she’s the best rebound relationship I’ve ever had. I got very drunk one Friday afternoon in college and walked to my girlfriend’s apartment. We were in a rough patch and me showing up wasted was the final straw. She dumped me and told me to go home. I went to my friend’s house instead and continued drinking. Due to my intoxication, I forgot she broke up with me and drove to her apartment the next day to hang out. She proceeded to dump me a second time in less than 12 hours. We never got back together, but I do drink less now. We got into a fight and broke up on a cruise ship. On New Year’s Eve. With three days left to go on the cruise. Do I win anything?
LEWIS COUNTY WEEKENDER • The Chronicle, Centralia/Chehalis, WA. Thursday, Februrary 14, 2019 • 7
For Valentine’s Day: 23 Nice Ways to Say No to a Date By R.M. Barrows
10) I get so many requests that I am sorry that I can’t even give you a personal reply. Please excuse this email form letter. Best of luck finding another date for the Inaugural Ball.
is not a reflection of your worthiness or your character.
11) When taking on a new boyfriend, I have to be very selective Just in case you are still waiting for so I can pay my full attention to him, 3) I can only go out with those guys the right Prince or Princess Charming and I can only go out with those to ask you out for Valentine’s Day, and for whom I feel a real connection. for whom I have unconditional Ultimately, and for purely subjective just in case you are not particularly reasons, you did not spark that kind of enthusiasm and a conviction that looking forward to spending enthusiasm in me. Please keep in mind my friends and family will share that Valentine’s Day by yourself (again), that a person to whom one girl doesn’t enthusiasm. So, thank you for asking, and just in case you might even be but no. Of course, it’s quite possible respond may be met with great thinking about saying yes to someone that some other girl will see things enthusiasm by another. you know you should say no to, you differently, so keep trying until you might want to rehearse a few of these find a girl who will say yes. 4) I’ve discussed this with my very nice ways to say No. roommates and my friends, and sadly, You never know when they will 12) I’m afraid that I’m going to pass because of the intense competition in come in handy. on your request, but I do hope you You’ve all used the standard ways to the current dating market, I’m forced find a nice girl and go on to become to be highly selective and I must often say no to a date like saying: a zillionaire and tell everyone what pass up many potentially promising “Sorry, I have to do my laundry an idiot I was for saying “No.” prospects. on New Year’s Eve,” or “I think my second cousin is coming into town on Valentine’s Day.” But rather than hurting a guy’s feelings by saying “No, no, no, a thousand times no, no way I’d ever go out with you, Bozo,” here are some very courteous and creative ways to say no to a guy. These new, more delicate ways to say “no” are based on the way that publishers and literary agents say no to aspiring writers, So here are a couple of suggestions to use the next time Mr. Wrong asks you to go out on a date with him for the umpteenth time. Rather than just saying, “No, and please don’t ask me again,” you can practice saying no with some of these more soothing replies like ... 1) I can’t believe how many requests I have received recently, and I’m having an impossible time trying to decide which ones to say yes to. So rather than holding you up for a moment longer, I want to let you know right away so you can continue your search for the perfect date for you.
6) I’m sorry, but your proposal does not sufficiently engage my interests. Please understand that this is not a statement about your marketability. Others may view you quite differently. But don’t feel rejected. As they say, “Every No gets you closer to Yes.” 7) I’m sorry, but I can’t say that you’re a good fit with the kind of material I feel confident going out with in the current market.
13) Thank you for your request, but I am fully committed to my other boyfriends at this time. 14) Thank you for asking, but I have a full list and I will be taking myself off the market soon and I will no longer be acquiring new boyfriends. 15) Sorry, due to the number of requests I get, I have been obliged to institute a policy of not accepting unsolicited requests for dates. 16) Unfortunately, I only accept six to nine new dates a year and I must often reject some very worthy fellows. 17) While I find your material
18) Many fine young men ask me to go out with them and it’s unfortunate that I can’t go out with them all. 19) I am sorry that I do not have better news for you, but I do wish you well in finding a date for the party. There are many girls in this state who might love to go out with you. 20) Thank you for sending me your video invitation to the party. However, it is my policy to accept referrals only. Please note that your correspondence has not been read, watched or listened to. 21) I was delighted to receive your request and I have given it my most careful consideration, but alas, and as much as I hate to relay the news with a form letter email, I’m sorry, but the answer is No. 22) Sorry, you’re just not my cup of tea. 23) I’m sorry, but you should have met me when I was still a nymphomaniac. Robert Barrows is with R.M. Barrows, Inc. Advertising & Public Relations in San Mateo, California.
8) I’m truly sorry to say that I didn’t like you better, but I’m sure it is quite possible that you will find someone who will find you much more interesting and attractive than I do. 9) I’m sorry, but I am not quite as enthusiastic about going out with you as I would have to be if I were going to say Yes. Of course, dating is subjective, and another girl might feel differently, so I wish you the best of success in finding someone who will go out with you.
710 W. Main St., • Centralia, WA • (360) 669-5960
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2) I apologize for taking longer than expected, but due to the sheer volume of requests I get, I’m afraid I must turn down your invitation. It was a hard choice to make and I know this is disappointing, but please know that it
5) I’m sorry, but I have a full list right now and I can’t take on any new dates unless they come with a recommendation from someone I personally know, someone whose judgment I respect, and someone who knows what I look for in a man.
interesting, and I am sure you must be a charming and dynamic fellow, I have concluded that you are just not right for me. But please don’t let that discourage you, I appreciate your effort and I urge you to pursue your other possibilities.
8 • LEWIS COUNTY WEEKENDER • The Chronicle, Centralia/Chehalis, WA. Thursday, Februrary 14, 2019
Sip Some Sandstone Distillery’s Award Winning Moonshine on Valentine’s Day BY THE WEEKENDER
Valentine’s Day got you down? If you are going to drown your sorrows, turn to Tenino’s Sandstone Distillery’s Stone Carver White Whiskey, which just won a double-gold medal from the group The Fifty Best under the category of Best Moonshine. The spirits judging group of 19 held a blind tasting of 14 moonshine whiskies, and chose Sandstone’s moonshine as the top of the class. Stone Carver White Whiskey is distilled from wheat and malted barley grown in Washington state, and comes in at 86 proof.
Judges Notes: Nose:
Sugarcane, burnt sugar, white Karo syrup, cotton candy, raw honey, crème brulee, corn pops, honeycomb cereal, peanut butter, Reese’s cups, vanilla,
chocolate, baked apple, apple, pear, tangerine, tropical fruit, raisins, vaguely fruity, vegetal, sweet onions, cactus, herbs, tarragon, spice, white peppercorn, canola oil, pine, gin, bourbon, rain, clean dew.
Palate:
Apple, green apple, peach, baked pears, tropical fruit, bananas, sugarcane juice, citrus, floral, herbs, mint, vegetal, grain, cacao, almonds, a little spicy, pink peppercorn, salty, cedar, creamy, gin-like, balanced, approachable, ultrasmooth, richly sumptuous.
Finish:
Apricot, bananas, elderberry, citrus, touch of burnt sugar, minty, juniper, pink peppercorn, cedar, dusty, earthy, seawater, fiery, develops well, balanced, smooth, easy, great finish, excellent neat, delicious.
According to Sandstone Distillery’s website, Stone Carver White Whiskey is a multiple year Double Gold
Lewis County’s
Best New Event Center
Sandstone Distillery
Sandstone Distillery offers tours and tastings throughout the week.
Medalist at the Seattle International Spirits competition, and was awarded Sip Magazine’s Best of the Northwest. “This clear spirit is a flavorful, bold, un-aged whiskey artfully hand-crafted from Washington-grown grains, fermented until the time is just right, and distilled into a whiskey worthy of barreling. But Stone Carver White is reserved instead for those wanting the ‘just off the still’ experience. Sip and enjoy!”
IF YOU WANT TO TASTE WHISKEY: Sandstone Distillery is located just outside of Tenino. Tours and tastings are offered Monday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday, noon to 5 p.m., and Sundays by appointment only (360.239.7272). The distillery is located at 842 Wright Road SE. Information: www.sandstonedistillery.com or www. Facebook.com/SandstoneDistillery
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LEWIS COUNTY WEEKENDER • The Chronicle, Centralia/Chehalis, WA. Thursday, Februrary 14, 2019 • 9
For Valentine’s Day, a Roundup of Books About Love No Date? At Least You Can Read About Love and Romance By Moira Macdonald
SEATTLE TIMES ARTS CRITIC
As Valentine’s Day approaches, my reading tastes turn to thoughts of love — in all its forms. Here are four recently published books I’ve read and enjoyed this past month, each of which had something to say about that heartshaped emotion.
‘The Proposal’
The most obvious fit for a Valentine’s theme was Jasmine Guillory’s “The Proposal” (Berkley, $15 paperback), a straight-up contemporary romance that’s as likable as it’s unsurprising. Nikole, a Los Angeles freelance writer who hates filled doughnuts, beaches, carrot cake, rompers and people who don’t use Oxford commas, is horrified when her short-term boyfriend surprises her with a scoreboard proposal at a Dodgers game, going down on one knee “dangerously close to the puddle of spilled beer.” This guy — an annoying actor who hasn’t even yet figured out how to spell her name correctly — is clearly out; a nice doctor named Carlos, who helps her scoot away from a camera crew, just might be in. It’s a charming little meet-cute, kicking off a novel that’s the book equivalent of a movie rom-com: light, sweet, enjoyably uncomplicated. You know exactly how things are going to work out, and they do, because that’s how rom-coms work. But the real pleasure here is the little world Guillory has created, in just two books (Carlos’ best friend is Drew, who was the romantic hero of Guillory’s previous novel, “The Wedding Date”): a Los Angeles populated with a diverse, devoted crowd of nice people who hold each other up, treat each other to cupcakes, have each other’s back, and occasionally fall in love.
‘The Wife Between Us’
Somewhat less pleasant (though just as much fun, in a different way) is the icy world of “The Wife Between Us” (St. Martin’s Griffin, $16.99 paperback) by Greer Hendricks and Sarah Pekkanen. A significant segment of the crimefiction world is still happily ensconced in “Gone Girl” territory — female-focused
psychological thrillers, unreliable narrators, grab-the-steering-wheel-in-a-panic twists — and this book is a proud citizen. In alternating chapters, we meet Nellie, a sweet Manhattan preschool teacher eagerly anticipating her wedding to the handsome hedge-fund manager who has swept her off her feet, and Vanessa, the wife he tossed aside, who’s trying to put her life back together but can’t shake an obsession with her young replacement. Your basic love triangle? Hardly. Hendricks and Pekkanen have a real knack for plot-spinning, and “The Wife Between Us” unfolds in breathlessly ominous chapters, occasionally pausing for a narrative karate-chop. I’m reluctant to say much about this book, for fear that it might retaliate and start stalking me or something; suffice to say that as “Gone Girl” offspring go, this is in the top tier.
‘This Is Not a Love Song’
“This Is Not a Love Song” is the title of Brendan Mathews’ short-story collection (Little, Brown, $26), many of which have to do with love, in its presence or absence. I’ve been waiting for something new from Mathews since his irresistible 2017 debut, the rollicking 1930s adventure “The World of Tomorrow”; this book, a collection of previously published work, finds him in a more somber mood. There’s some experimentation with form here — the title story has screenplay-ish stage directions between its vignettes; “The Drive” uses intentional repetition to create a numbing rhythm, adding tension to the awkward moment it depicts. But mostly what we find are quiet portraits of a moment in time. In “Airborne,” a once-happy married couple is pulled apart by an interloper in their marriage: toxic mold, which may or may not exist in their home (he thinks it does; she thinks it doesn’t). Jenna, the wife, ponders how “she and Dan were once like two overlapping circles, a Venn diagram of autonomous crescents and a common oval that held the best part of each of
them. Now they are as jagged as gears, each working against the natural motion of the other.” “My Last Attempt to Explain to You What Happened with the Lion Tamer,” narrated by a circus clown in love with a pretty trapeze artist (“from the tips of my size 24 shoes to the top of my busted stovepipe hat, I wanted you”), feels like a tiny, wistful movie; you can almost hear the tinny sideshow music behind it. And “Look at Everything,” in which a would-be photographer accidentally sets off a church fire, gradually reveals itself to be about a marriage; one that’s now just faintly smoking ash. The husband, thinking back on the moment he realized his wife was gone, “had the sudden, weightless feeling of a cartoon character who looks down and realizes that he has already walked off the cliff. There was nothing to do but fall.”
‘Bowlaway’
But if I had to ask a book to be my Valentine this month, it would be Elizabeth McCracken’s whimsical, enchanting “Bowlaway” ($27.99, HarperCollins); it’s the sort of novel with which you fall in love. McCracken, author of the National Book Awardnominated “The Giant’s House,” hasn’t published a novel in 17 years, and “Bowlaway” arrives with a sense of fanfare, of red-velvet curtains parting before an eagerly hushed audience. And then, off we go, into a multigenerational tale of the fortunes of a family, a small New England city named Salford (“hard north of Boston, with a sliver of coastline just big enough to ramshackle the houses and web the occasional foot”), and a six-lane bowling alley opened there, in the early years of the 20th century. “Our subject is love because our
subject is bowling,” the book proclaims early on: candlepin bowling, to be specific (a New England form of the sport, with a grapefruit-sized bowling ball and five cylindrical pins which make an irresistible sound “knottering together”). The bowling alley — originally owned by Bertha Truitt, who arrives unexpectedly in town “as though she’d dropped from the sky” — endures, as the decades pass and characters come and go: the kind doctor Leviticus Sprague, who instantly falls in love with Bertha; the lonely hired girl Margaret Vanetten, herself desperately looking for love; Cracker Graham, a pinsetter dazzled by the beauty of candlepin; Joe Wear, an orphaned teenager when he first discovers Bertha, an old man by the book’s poignant end. The quirk factor here is off the charts, in a good way; this is the kind of town where everyone’s an eccentric, and you turn the pages wondering how long McCracken can sustain what seems like free-floating oddness. But every page seems to provide the kind of writing that makes a reader stop cold, savoring the moment. An unexpected hug is “a powdered milk embrace, something like actual love but reconstituted from a packet.” Margaret is described as “a cabinet of a woman, functional, extra, but nervous, cedar scented, lavender tinted.” The language is often deliciously playful; after a molasses flood (strange things happen in Salford), a group of women find that “(the) syrupy soles of their shoes skicked against the floor of the trolley.” It’s a novel that takes your hand and hurries you into an inviting, curious world, leaving you happily bereft at its end. Here’s hoping that all of us fall hard for a book, this Valentine’s Day — or any day.
10 • LEWIS COUNTY WEEKENDER • The Chronicle, Centralia/Chehalis, WA. Thursday, Februrary 14, 2019
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Viola Davis leads a team of amateurs in “Widows“ (2018, R), a gritty heist drama set in the corrupt culture of Chicago crime and politics. Also on DVD and at Redbox. Plus: offbeat Western “The Sisters Brothers” (2018, R), starring John C. Reilly and Joaquin Phoenix, and animated “The Grinch“ (2018, PG), featuring the voice of Benedict Cumberbatch.
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“The Grinch,” “Widows,” “The Sisters Brothers,” “The Girl in the Spider’s Web,” “A Private War.” Sean Axmaker is a Seattle film critic and writer. His reviews of streaming movies and TV can be found at streamondemandathome. com.
LEWIS COUNTY WEEKENDER • The Chronicle, Centralia/Chehalis, WA. Thursday, Februrary 14, 2019 • 11
Wake Up to Snow
Whether you’re a native Washingtonian or a recent transplant, you’ve probably realized that nothing but a blizzard can deter outdoor play in our state. Diehards swear by winter camping, and Eastern Washington’s crisp, sparkly snow welcomes visitors from the rainy west side. More than a few Washington state parks have winter camping opportunities. So come on out, get your noses cold, and then warm them up in a toasty tent, hut or RV.
shovels and dig out a campsite. Let the kids stomp out the tent platform before they run off to the playground. If you don’t want your tent to blow away while you’re snowshoeing, attach and bury dead-man anchors or snow-filled stuff sacks. Then, cook a meal in the kitchen shelter and take a hot shower in the year-round restroom. The groomed ski and snowshoe trails and tubing hill will keep you busy, and this alpine lake surrounded by snow-topped hills provides beyondInstagram-worthy snaps. Lake Wenatchee State Park lies 20 miles west of Leavenworth, where a congratulatory restaurant meal awaits after a successful night in the snow. Campsites are $20 a night and $10 per extra vehicle, plus a Sno-Park Permit.
Lake Wenatchee State Park
Fields Spring State Park
Valentine’s Day Giving You the Cold Shoulder? Don’t Fight It, Go Camp in the Snow
New to snow camping? Here’s your chance to dial your skills before hitting the backcountry. Every winter Lake Wenatchee State Park turns one day-use area into a primitive campground. So bring your
If you haven’t experienced the Blue Mountains in winter, Fields Spring State Park in the far southeastern part of Washington is a must-do. This large park in the gently folding hills has three winter options:
Washington State Parks
Snowshoers enjoy the beauty of Lake Wenatchee State Park.
• Tamarack Cabin near Wohelo Lodge (and a big sledding hill) sleeps four people. The comfortable cabin boasts a mini-fridge, bathroom with shower, microwave, coffee pot and parking spot. (Bring your own bed linens.) Bring snowshoes! The park features spectacular views on the 6 miles of groomed trails here. • Puffer Butte Warming Hut sits 4,500 feet above sea level and sleeps four. The hut provides an excellent intro to winter backpacking without the tent-camping part. A stove (stocked with firewood) will keep you cozy, but first you’ll make the 1-mile uphill trek with all your provisions. Hardy winter recreationists can reserve this hut
OPEN MONDAY FEB. 18 10am-8pm
through the park at 509-256-3332 for $20 a night. Caveat: while you’ll have the place to yourself after dark, the hut is open to the public for warming all day. • Primitive snow camping: Have a bigger group, or just not into backpacking? Drive to Fields Spring’s campground (near the bathroom and day warming hut), unload your gear and stake your tent in a flat campsite. You’ll have to do some digging, as the sites are not cleared. Remember your wool or synthetic layers, puffy jackets (no cotton) and hot water bottle or foot warmers to heat up your sleeping bag. Sites are $20 a night plus permits. Extra vehicle - $10. — Source: Washington State Parks
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12 • LEWIS COUNTY WEEKENDER • The Chronicle, Centralia/Chehalis, WA. Thursday, Februrary 14, 2019
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