City Weekly Nov 27, 2014 by Copperfield Publishing

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Lawmakers are trying to drive biker gangs out of Utah. By Colby Frazier

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CWCONTENTS COVER STORY By colby frazier

An increase in biker gangs—but not in crime—has lawmakers poised to pen a law that some say would lead to profiling of anyone with a beard and a bike. Cover photo by Austen Diamond On the cover: Former Barons President Parker, Vice President Lebowski, and President Ron “Dirtbag” Simmons

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CONTRIBUTOR

LETTERS opinion NEWS A&E DINE CINEMA true tv MUSIC COMMUNITY

Mike Riedel

Mike Riedel is a native guy, born and raised. He’s worked for Fox 13 News as a photojournalist for more than 20 years, sticking his lens and microphone in everybody’s business. Beer is Riedel’s main hobby—he makes it, writes about it, judges it and, oh yeah, drinks it. He loves Utah and its beer and spends a good deal of his spare time trying to educate people about both.

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A pre-Christmas event Join us for hymns and readings that celebrate the coming of Christmas The Cathedral welcomes Gov. Gary Herbert, Elder L. Tom Perry, East High Madrigal Choir, and many other dignitaries

The service begins at 4:00 p.m. on Sunday, November 30th All are welcome regardless of denomination Please come and enjoy the music!

NEWS

Children’s moccasins found near Great Salt Lake shed light on ancient culture. Facebook.com/SLCWeekly

GAVIN’S UNDERGROUND

Califer Games’ Peter Anderson & Curtis Mirci on their RPG March to the Moon.

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Letters Hunters Are Not Sadists

While I respect Harold Rose’s opinion as an advocate for free speech, I must admit I was put off by his implications [Letters, “What’s Next?” Nov. 20, City Weekly]. Hunting might not be for everyone, but to imply that I must like beating my wife because I enjoy the sport of hunting is uncalled for. I try to be an ethical hunter. I do my best to take an animal cleanly, quickly and humanely. I frankly am remorseful about the killing aspect of hunting. I hunt because of a love for the outdoors, my love for game meat, and the bond I enjoy with my friends and family. By Rose’s admonishment, I am not an outdoorsman, but a sadist (and, apparently, a bully.) By that logic, cattle ranchers are homicidal maniacs! I would invite Rose to rethink his position on the matter, out of respect and understanding, for a long tradition in this state and country. Hunting has put food on the table since before there were tables.

Matthew Henry Sugar House

Just a Step Away

As the weather changes, sometimes drastically like it does in Utah, the article by Eric S. Peterson on homelessness in Salt Lake City drew my attention [“A Load Off,” Nov. 13, City Weekly].

WRITE US: Salt Lake City Weekly, 248 S. Main, Salt Lake City, UT 84101. E-mail: comments@cityweekly.net. Fax: 801-575-6106. We reserve the right to edit for length and clarity. Preference will be given to letters that are 300 words or less and sent uniquely to City Weekly. Full name, address and phone number must be included, even on e-mailed submissions, for verification purposes. Peterson writes that Dash’s situation is “sadly common for a lot of homeless people.” At 24 years old, Dash has gone through three years of heroin addiction, tormented by an abusive boyfriend, only to find refuge on the street. Scary. But there is hope on the way, and they need a lot of help. Mobile storage lockers for their belongings during the day would help the homeless go to job interviews without carrying their life’s possessions with them. They would be stolen if left unattended. Kudos to David Brooks of Revolution United and to Travis Hysell’s nonprofit Legacy Initiative for raising the funds for these storage lockers to be free to the homeless. There are a lot of people just one step away from being homeless. I know, being one of them.

Mark Hurst Murray

That’s the real reason why the VA medical system is such a horrid mess, and why there are large percentages of vets who are unemployed, homeless, have untreated PTSD and commit suicide. Legislators are all about outrageously large and wasteful military budgets so their already filthy-rich benefactors and donors in the military-industrial complex stay rich and get even richer. But to them, the U.S. soldiers and vets are relatively cheap and completely expendable cannon fodder.

Stuart McDonald Salt Lake City Correction: The Holiday Gift Guide [Nov. 20, City Weekly] listed an incorrect price for the Bug-A-Salt at the Clark Planetarium’s Planet Fun (110 S. 400 West, Salt Lake City, 801-456-7827, ClarkPlanetarium.org). The Bug-A-Salt is $39.95.

They Don’t Care

I watched Orrin Hatch being interviewed on local TV news about Veterans Day. It is unbelievable how cynical and hypocritical Republican legislators in Congress— especially Hatch—and in the states always talk about how patriotic they are, and how strongly they support our veterans, yet refuse to support or vote for adequate funding of essential programs for those veterans.

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Salt Lake City Weekly is published every Thursday by Copperfield Publishing Inc. The Salt Lake City Weekly is an independent publication dedicated to alternative news and news sources, and serves as a comprehensive entertainment guide. 55,000 copies of the Salt Lake City Weekly are free of charge at more than 1,800 locations along the Wasatch Front, limit one copy per reader. Additional copies of the paper may be purchased for $1 (Best of Utah and other special issues, $5) payable to the Salt Lake City Weekly in advance. No person, without expressed permission of Copperfield Publishing Inc., may take more than one copy of any Salt Lake City Weekly issue. No portion of the Salt Lake City Weekly may be reproduced in whole or part by any means, including electronic retrieval systems, without the written permission of the Publisher. Third-Class postage paid at Midvale, UT. Delivery may take one week. All Rights Reserved. ®

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OPINION

Welcome Home

In Utah, undocumented immigrants work in agriculture, constr uction, landscaping, hospitality and other key economic sectors. The ski industry, dairy farmers and other businesses rely on these workers for difficult, often dangerous labor that most of us avoid. Independentcontractor schemes, temporary agencies and various other tactics are used to skirt federal laws prohibiting employment of the undocumented. This amounts to a de facto amnest y, but the major benefits accrue to economic interests, not to undocumented workers, who are frequently exploited for pennies on the dollar—or aren’t paid at all. A prevailing narrative arising from a 2011 “Utah Solution” posits that the state favors immigration reform. This fabrication was developed to counter an image of the state and the LDS Church as anti-immigrant. This dishonest narrative, cheered on by the LDS-Church-owned Deseret News, led to a package of Utah laws that included an A rizona-st yle crackdown law—largely struck down in court—and state work permits similar to indentured servitude. Immigration is a federal matter, so the Supremacy Clause would render the Utah permits unconstitutional. Legislative counsel advised the same in 2011, but legislators, former Attorney General Mark Shurtleff and Gov. Gary Herbert did not care. They led undocumented immigrants into false hope that exposed them to swindlers. These Utah policymakers also thumbed their noses at the Constitution. To avoid legal defeat, legislators and the governor have delayed implementation of the law three times, most recently until summer 2017. As well as giving many undocumented immigrants false hope, the misinformation stif led conversation: Utahns believed the lies and deemed immigration solved. Regrettably, both the Utah Democratic Part y and the Republican Part y

B Y M a r k A lv a r e z

subordinated vulnerable human beings to economic and institutional interests. The “Utah Solution” failed not only on Constitutional grounds but also on political ones: The Congressional delegation remained unmoved. Among Utah Congressmen, only Sen. Orrin Hatch stood for immigration reform. The rest, including the Democrat, opposed reform or remained silent. During the past 10 years, three serious attempts to reform immigration failed. The basic challenges for reform have long been fixing and streamlining the system for those who wish to come here, modernizing internal and external enforcement mechanisms to improve compliance with and respect for the law, and dealing with the undocumented immigrant population. President Reagan signed major immigration reform in 1986, but recently, Republicans have been obstructionist. Many claim to favor reform, but they neither propose anything nor allow votes. Expressing frustration over Republican inaction, President Obama announced action that included a process to grant parents of U.S. citizens and legal permanent residents temporary status in the United States if they pass background checks and meet other criteria including having lived here for five years or more. This executive action is not the first. In 2011, the Obama administration published principles for prosecutorial discretion that focused resources on high-priority cases. In June 2012, the administration laid out Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals (DACA), which has allowed more than 600,000 high-achieving youth—6,000plus in Utah—to obtain work permits. Republicans and others complained about DACA and filed lawsuits, but DACA remained legally sound. In March 2013, the implementation of provisional unlawful-presence waivers helped thousands of families avoid separations that can last months or years.

In November 2013, “parole in place” (akin to humanitarian relief) for close relatives of people serving in the military eliminated the needless separation of families during the process of obtaining lawful status. Recently, on my Spanish-language radio show Sin Rodeos, a guest said that he did not particularly like Obama but that parole in place had allowed him, a member of the Utah National Guard, to help his undocumented parents quickly gain permanent residence. Otherwise, his parents would have had to leave the U.S. for 10 years. The current immigration action centers on family unity, but it is not all-inclusive. On Sept. 3, 2014, 137 law professors wrote Obama and laid out broad authority for executive action. The Department of Justice recently advised that immigration action was OK for parents of citizens and lawful permanent residents, but not for parents of DACA recipients. Immigration reform and executive actions will never be fair to all people, but policymakers should be mindful of human stories. Mothers and fathers who have raised foreign-born children here for 15 years or more will not qualify under this immigration action, yet they will be happy for their children who do qualify. Why should these parents be excluded? The average undocumented immigrant has lived here for 13 years. Childless undocumented immigrants often do strenuous, thankless jobs, yet mostly will remain in immigration limbo regardless of their contributions and effort. Why should they be excluded? The history of immigration in the U.S. has been overwhelmingly positive. Immigrants have enriched our economy and society. Irrational debate and political dishonesty should not threaten that legacy. CW

Utahns believed the lies and deemed immigration solved.

Mark Alvarez is the immigration specialist for Telemundo Utah and an attorney with Immigrant Defenders Law Group. Send feedback to comments@cityweekly.net.

STAFF BOX

Readers can comment at cityweekly.net

What are your thoughts about President Obama’s decision on immigration? Alissa Dimick: #THANKSOBAMA. BJ Viehl: I think it’s great what he did. Waiting for Republicans to push an immigration-reform bill through obviously failed. Now, hopefully, immig rants can become less intimidated and step out from hiding and actually work toward legal living status. Jeremiah Smith: Obama made a decision on immigration? Well, it wasn’t on TV, so it must not be important or real. Andy Sutcliffe: It’s about time. It’s called leadership.

Paula Saltas: Aren’t we all descendants from immigrants? Why is an American life more important than any other life?

Eric Peterson: As an objective reporter I’m not allowed to have opinions on certain subjects. I will say this, though: Politically speaking, Obama’s executive action was a genius maneuver. It puts Republicans in a box to actually draft a serious immigration-reform bill. If they pass a good one, Obama can receive some credit for breaking the gridlock. If they argue about it but fail to pass a bill, it perpetuates the image of a do-nothing Congress made all the worse by the recently gained GOP majority in both houses and could also further alienate Latino voters from the GOP. It could also force the Tea Party faction of the Senate to once again threaten to shut down the government over the executive action—a move that would again exasperate voters who just gave both houses to the Republicans so that they could accomplish something in government, not just shut it down.

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HITS&MISSES by Katharine Biele

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You might note that Utah did not get the seven feet of snow that landed in New York. Even with winter and mountains, Utah is still a desert area, making water-sucking projects all the more baff ling, like the nuclear plant proposal in Green River that would take 53,600 acre-feet per year, and the estimated 1 million gallons a day going to the NSA facilit y in Bluffdale. And then there’s fracking. Even w ith new technolog y that purports to pump in oil rather than water, environmentalists worr y about contamination of groundwater. The Division of Oil, Gas & Mining has already signed off on a couple of fracking experiments in the Moab area—before any definitive studies, according to The Salt Lake Tribune. As usual, money takes precedence over the environment.

Nice Shot Tr y and tr y again. That’s the mantra of Utah’s str uggling g un-control advocates, about a dozen of whom asked lawmakers and the governor to rethink the 2004 law that allows guns on college campuses. As if we don’t have enough trouble with police off icers shooting citizens and kids “accidentally” shooting other kids, it’s somehow important to have ever yone concealing their guns for that special time when someone else concealing a weapon takes it out and shoots. While many came from the religious community, the gun-control group is not a bunch of bleeding hearts—they just don’t want to see blood stain their campuses. Free speech goes both ways.

Bottoms Up Not to beat a dead horse, but it won’t be long before Sen. John Valentine is off to new adventures, and maybe the Zion Curtain will go with him. A poll by Utah Policy and Dan Jones & Associates showed that a stunning 62 percent of respondents want the 7-foot barrier gone. And most said they believe our liquor laws hurt economic development and tourism. But at his monthly KUED news conference, Gov. Gar y Herbert said he hasn’t heard from anyone saying they won’t come to Utah because of the liquor laws. This may require a letter-writing campaign, but common wisdom has it that visitors are often confused and bemused by our odd little state and its attempts to turn off the spigot.

Katie McEntire, a content writer for an Ogden-based online media company, has always enjoyed creative writing, but the professional path into technical writing seemed like a less scary choice. This year, however, McEntire decided to take the plunge and try National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo for short), an event during which participants from all over the world write an entire novel during the month of November. Though the Paris, Tenn., native hasn’t quite reached the standard goal of 50,000 words, she took a break from writing to talk to City Weekly about her NaNoWriMo experience. Read more at CityWeekly.net, or join a group of local NaNoWriMo participants at the Salt Lake City Main Library on Sunday, Nov. 30, from 2 to 5 p.m. as they make the final push.

Why did you decide to do NaNoWriMo this year?

A lot of people use it as an excuse to keep working on things they’ve been working on. I’m not really a creative writer by trade, so I figured this would be a nice way to stretch my legs and try something different. I took creative writing classes, but the most I wrote was maybe 10 page stories, so not a whole lot compared to NaNoWriMo, where the goal is 50,000 words. When you get to start writing, that’s way more than it seems. Just saying 50,000 words is like, “That’s no big deal, I can read that in a day,” and then as soon as I sit down, my mind just goes blank.

Why is it so hard?

Fiction is tough. When you first think about it, it’s just “Oh, I just make stuff up? That’s easy; I can do that.” The way I’d strategized it was, “OK, 50,000 words. I can do 25 chapters of 2,000 words. That’s easy, I can do that.” It’s a way bigger chunk than I expected it to be. I’ll get out everything I can think of in 500 words and think, “Well, crap. What do I do now?” It’s easy to put a cap on it, or just stop yourself when you really just need to keep going. It makes me wonder why it’s so hard to get that out. What makes it so intimidating to express yourself?

How many words are you at? Well, I’m a slacker. I’m at 10,000. It’s a fifth of the way through, but it’s not where I wanted to be. Before Nov. 1—the rule is that you’re supposed to start writing at 12:01 on Nov. 1—I was prepared, I’d been thinking about it, I had notes and bullet points, and then as soon as it came around, I was like, “Mmmm, maybe not.” Life gets in the way, too. I have nights where I’ll get home from work and think, “I will write. I will write.” And then something more fun happens.

You’re in the final stretch—what’s your plan? I’m just going to try to barf it out as much as I can—just get it out. When I started, I’d write a chapter, and then I’d go back and revise. I’d write another chapter, and then go back. It was not efficient. I think it’s part of the reason I’m so far behind—I spent so much time going over and over the first chapter. I don’t think you’re supposed to do that—the point is to just spit it onto the page. And if it’s gross, that’s fine; if it’s good, that’s better. Once November is over, it’ll be nice to come back and look at it. I might surprise myself—I’m not sure if I’ll recognize what I was doing in parts.

Did anything surprise you, besides how hard it’s been?

It’s become way more personal than I expected it to be. I’m seeing characters, scenes and moments that I’ve apparently been thinking about for years. It’s interesting to see how much you have inside your own head.

Rachel Piper rpiper@cityweekly.net @racheltachel

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STRAIGHT DOPE Last Call I’m in my mid-40s. My cholesterol is great, my blood pressure and weight are perfect, I have no history of serious illness, I’ve never smoked, my use of drugs has been minimal, and I rarely drink anymore. I don’t exercise as much as I should, but my job keeps me on my feet and moving. The handful of lifeexpectancy calculators I’ve used online have me living to between 80 and 84. At what age can I just say fuggit and start eating any damn thing I want without fear of negative health consequences before I croak? —Daniel T. You piqued my interest. After Googling my way to the University of Pennsylvania’s life-expectancy calculator, I soon received the information that I will most likely live until I’m 93, with a 25 percent chance of reaching 102 1/2. Egads, I thought—I haven’t saved nearly enough money for the nursing home/vegetable incubator I will undoubtedly need for those last couple decades. Luckily, the stress of the subsequent hours of financial calculations caused the health-damage equivalent of a brain aneurysm, changing the UPenn prediction to “You could keel over at any moment.” Those weren’t going to be fun years anyway. Interestingly, when I altered my starting age to 85 I found I could only gain or lose about three quarters of a year by playing around with the diet, exercise, and smoking parameters. This seems to point toward the idea of a death clock: by the time we reach a certain age, how long we’ve got left has been predetermined by our genes and previous lifestyle choices. Unlike the population at large, however, the Straight Dope doesn’t trust random online quizzes, so we decided to delve a little further into the facts on this one. (Just don’t expect us to get into the science of Which Disney Princess Are You?) Studies have traditionally defined “elderly” as 65 and older, and in most studies, lifestyle choices (diet, exercise, etc.) were seen to have an effect through age 75. That’s around where the data have tended to stop, in part because for most of human history few people cracked 70—for a while there, it was pretty much just Charlemagne, a couple of shahs, and quite a surprising number of inconsequential Lithuanians. But this research is becoming less and less relevant: It’s the 21st century now, and Hugh Hefner’s doctors want to know if they should restrict his Viagra consumption. The proportion of the population identified as the “extreme elderly”—85 and up—will increase by more than half in the next 15 years. As a public service, then, we’ve broken it down for the post-80 crowd: Cardiovascular disease. This is a major health problem among those over 75, affecting 50 percent of women and 70 to 80 percent of men. Reducing blood pressure can help the extreme elderly avoid heart attacks and strokes, but studies show it won’t actually make you live longer. Go figure.

BY CECIL ADAMS

SLUG SIGNORINO

Cholesterol reduction. Diet and exercise don’t have clear proven effects. Nor do most traditional drugs, like statins or beta blockers. Aspirin might be beneficial, but it also might make your stomach bleed. Your call on that one. Smoking. A study using data from nearly 95,000 Japanese men and women found reduced mortality risk for ex-smokers who quit between ages 65 and 79. On the other hand, some doctors have speculated that for the very old, the stress of trying to quit may have a harmful effect outweighing the benefit. On to some of the things we do know. Perhaps surprisingly, the extreme elderly who are slightly overweight have the most favorable mortality rate. Those who gain a modest amount of weight while getting older are also much better off. Only the obese and the diabetic stand to benefit from weight loss in old age—weight loss among the diabetic can actually reduce cognitive decline. But those who were overweight when younger still had a higher risk. Maybe most baffling is the news on alcohol consumption (pay attention here, Daniel): A very large 23-year study of elderly Californians reported that drinkers’ annual risk of death was 15 percent lower than nondrinkers’. This was true for men and women, as well as for all types of alcohol. Mortality was highest for those who quit drinking during old age, while those who picked it up lived longer. In other words, we should stop fretting over the fact that Gérard Depardieu drinks 14 bottles of wine a day. It seems reasonable to conclude that unless you already have serious health problems (like diabetes), your best bet in advanced age is probably to avoid any drastic changes to whatever lifestyle your body has gotten used to. However, if you’re not that fussed about losing those last 10 years of drooling on the crossword you’re desperately trying to finish in order to stave off Alzheimer’s, I would say go for it. Throw back the Twinkies. Shovel down the deep-fried everything. Swear off exercise and sit on the couch binge-watching Netflix for the rest of your life. Just God forbid you stop drinking. Send questions to Cecil via StraightDope. com or write him c/o Chicago Reader, 350 N. Orleans, Chicago 60654.

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NEWS

religion

Same-Sex Sanctuary

“A lot of people that walk in here aren’t mad at God; they’re mad at a church.”

—Pastor Dee Bradshaw of the Sacred Light of Christ Church

photo illustration by derek carlisle

LGBT-friendly churches give shelter to those rejected by families and faiths. By Eric S. Peterson epeterson@cityweekly.net @ericspeterson On a recent Sunday, half a dozen people gathered in a corner alcove of the Cathedral Church of Saint Mark in downtown Salt Lake City, glad not to be outside during the first real snow of the season. They listened as The Very Reverend Jack Potter—a retired dean filling in for a reverend who could not make the service because of the snowstorm—spoke of the parable in Matthew 25 that says that the Lord, like a shepherd, will separate the sheep from the goats when it comes to those to be saved and those who’ll meet an eternity of punishment. For Potter, the scripture’s great message is in the admonishment that the way man feeds his fellow man when he is hungry, clothes him when he is naked and visits him while imprisoned is the same way he shows his respect for the Lord, as the scripture states that “just as you did it to one of the least of these who are members of my family, you did it to me.” Despite the literal division in the scripture, Potter sees hope in the ability of all—especially the “least of these”— to find themselves in God. “There is an opportunity to see God within us, helping us to see where we are and who we are,” Potter said. “There is real hope there.” And what is said in subdued tones at the Episcopal service can speak volumes to many in Utah, especially to those who’ve discovered that who they are— gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender—has meant a tragic break with the faith and the family they were raised in. In Utah’s religious landscape, dominated by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, many have felt forced out of homes and church participation. And for those still hungry for religious fellowship, services held by the Episcopal and Unitarian churches and others can provide a spiritual home. As far as Potter’s concerned, sexual orientation does not bar one from the love of the Lord. “Those distinctions don’t apply,” Potter says. “How one feels or however one’s sexual orientation may be is that person’s business, not mine. I think it’s very important that we be open and

The Cathedral of Saint Mark at 231 E. 100 South welcomes all who seek God, no matter their sexual orientation. inclusive and caring and loving.” At the Sacred Light of Christ Church (823 S. 600 East), a self-proclaimed “gay church,” the distinctions do matter, but the difference of its parishioners is a matter of celebration. Worshippers come as they are—some in collared shirts and dress slacks, and others in jeans and knit caps. The service begins with a group of performers leading the congregation in an upbeat Christian rock tune with the words to the song projected on a large TV screen, transposed over nature scenes of babbling canyon creeks and cloud shadows passing over rocky mountains. People spontaneously call out “ Amen!” and other praises, and reach their hands upward in rejoicing. Pastor Dee Bradshaw, who has been leading the congregation since 2002, became a member in the ’80s and recalls the shock of the scene compared to the restrained LDS services he grew up with. “The first time I walked in here, I went, ‘What in the heck is this?’ ” Bradshaw says with a laugh. But despite the different tone of worship, he soon embraced the church’s open approach to the gospel, especially for how it creates a safe space for LGBT folks. “A lot of people that walk in here aren’t mad at God; they’re mad at a church,” Bradshaw says. “And when you talk to them, they realize that, ‘Well, it’s not God that rejects me.’ And that makes a big difference.” In some ways, he sees the church as kind of a spiritual ER, one that helps

people reconnect with God after being rejected from a faith. Oftentimes, after Sacred Light has helped them out, they find new faiths. “They come here for healing, and then they move on,” Bradshaw says. But his congregation usually stays at around 30 to 45 members who come for regular services and classes. These include Bible study and service projects that the ministry undertakes, such as providing hygiene and relief packages for LGBT inmates in the state prison. The church has also just begun serving regular meals to homeless youth in the city, many of whom are LGBT. In 2012, the Williams Institute released a study that estimated that 40 percent of homeless youth are LGBT, and nearly 7 out of 10 of them are on the street because they were rejected by their families. Bradshaw says reconnecting people to God often means re-examining the scriptures used to condemn homosexuality. His church teaches from a 2002 book called The Children Are Free: Re-examining the Biblical Evidence on Same-Sex Relationships, which makes the case that, for example, passages from the Old Testament that say that man “shall not lay with man” were made in condemnation of other belief systems of the day, some of which encouraged heterosexual men to have sex with a male priest to ensure a bountiful crop. Bradshaw says a lot of these scriptures simply show God’s desire to keep sex out of actual religious ritual, and don’t con-

demn it in people’s private lives. Bradshaw has seen firsthand the good works of the church, which has been a part of Salt Lake City’s religious landscape for more than 40 years. During a service the week before Thanksgiving, members spoke up for the things they were grateful for. One man thanked the relationship he has with the Lord for steering him away from addictions to sex and methamphetamines. One woman expressed thanks for the experience of her mental illness, which allows her to help others with a similar ailment. Vince Gutierrez, 57, has been active in the church for decades. He considers himself a “triple threat” when it comes to discrimination—gay, Latino and raised Catholic—and says the anger inside him against God for making him this way is an ongoing struggle. In his lifetime, Gutierrez has fought cancer and all the abuse and namecalling that every LGBT person deals with on a daily basis. He was beat up in high school and beat up in the Army, restrained on his bed and beaten by other soldiers with socks filled with soap bars. While in many ways he still considers himself Catholic, he says that at the Sacred Light of Christ Church, he can experience the fellowship of fellow survivors. “They go out every day and live their life despite it all, and that’s what gives me hope and courage,” Gutierrez says. “Despite everything that’s happened to them they’re here, right now living, and caring.” CW

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CITIZEN REVOLT

by ERIC S. PETERSON @ericspeterson

Ease Black Friday Guilt Feeling bad about elbowing an old lady in the face during a mad Black Friday scramble? Well, nothing salves the conscience like dropping off some warm winter clothing for those in need, which you can do on Black Friday at the Community Coat Exchange. This weekend, you can also stand in solidarity with Ferguson and join a rally against police brutality. Next week, SLC residents will want to stop by a Capital Improvement Board open house and help the city prioritize how to spend federal funds in the coming year on affordable housing projects and other social services.

Community Coat Exchange Eight Black Friday shopping tips:

Don’t make friends in line overnight; you may have to step over their lifeless bodies for an Xbox One.

When being interviewed by local news media outside of a store, at least wave to starving family back home.

6. Read all product reviews

carefully, then opt for the item packaged in the brightest colors.

5. Don’t waste time trying on

clothes—just assume XXL is your size.

Exhausted minimumwage retail workers are happy to negotiate $1.67 price adjustments, so ask.

3. Two shots in the air are

usually sufficent to disperse a crowd grabbing for your stuff (concealedcarry permit holders only).

The best items are always “in the back” waiting just for you—demand them.

Ignore all logical urges to shop another day when prices will be exactly the same.

Friday, Nov. 28

A lot of people are in need of warm winter clothes, and if that includes you, you’re welcome to swing by this event and pick up a new coat, no questions asked. If you’d like to exchange a coat, you can do that, too, and if you’d simply like to donate some warm coats or other clothing items, do it here, and they’ll get to the people who need them this winter season. Pioneer Park, 400 S. 300 West, Nov. 28, 10 a.m.-1 p.m. w w w. CoatExchange.org

SLC Stands With Ferguson Saturday, Nov. 29

In the days since a grand jury declined to indictOfficer Darren Wilson for the shooting death of Michael Brown, an unarmed teenager from Ferguson, Mo., riots and outrage have swept the country, and people have called for further investigation into the racially charged incident. Here in Salt Lake City, a rally will be held featuring speakers such as former Salt Lake City Mayor Rocky Anderson to show solidarity with Ferguson and to call for an end to police shootings in Utah and elsewhere. Wallace Bennett Federal Building, 125 S. State, Nov. 29, 2 p.m., http:// citywk.ly/1FoCTTq

Community Development Open House Monday, Dec. 1

Every year, the city receives federal funds for affordable-housing projects and economic opportunities for the have-nots in our city. Swing by this open house and give your input on how the city should prioritize this funding to help SLC’s low-income and homeless populations. Sorenson Unity Center, 1383 S. 900 West, 801-535-7712, Dec. 1, 5:30-7 p.m., SLCGov.com

Curses, Foiled Again

NEWS

Alan Knight, 47, denied robbing his neighbor in Swansea, Wales, and avoided prosecution by pretending to be “quadriplegic and in a comatose condition, bed-bound at home” after a neck injury, authorities said. They uncovered the ruse by tracking his supermarket loyalty card. Surveillance footage of Knight walking and driving confirmed their suspicion. (South Wales Evening Post)

QUIRKS

n Daniel Rice, 21, wanted for theft in Iowa, was captured in rural Rock Island County, Ill., after he called the sheriff’s office there to report being pursued by as many as 30 coyotes. Deputies who found him recognized him as a wanted fugitive and returned him to Muscatine County authorities. (Moline’s WQAD-TV)

Risky Art City officials removed a $559,000 sculpture from outside a recreation center in Calgary, Alberta, after it caused the sun to singe an art lover’s jacket. “It’s a beautiful, shiny object, and that, I think, is part of the problem,” said Sarah Iley, the city’s art and cultural manager. The steel artwork, titled “Wishing Well,” has hollow hemispheres for people to enter and send it text messages, which it translates into a light and sound display. Iley said the mirrored concave interior directed an intense narrow ray at the visitor’s jacket. The incident prompted officials to return the sculpture to the artist to fix it. (Calgary Herald)

Way to Go

n When a twin-engine plane taking off from an

airport in Wichita, Kan., lost power, it crashed into a building that FlightSafety International uses to train pilots. Investigators reported three of the four people killed were inside a flight simulator, which duplicates flying situations without the risks of actual flying. (Wichita’s KSNW-TV)

Traffic Court After their 15-year-old daughter was killed when the driver of the SUV she was riding in lost control while going nearly 90 miles per hour, Ronald and Tammy Coburn sued Pennsylvania’s Department of Transportation. They claimed it contributed to the girl’s death because road signs didn’t adequately warn of curves ahead. A Luzerne County jury sided with the parents and assigned 10 percent of the responsibility to PennDOT and the other 90 percent to driver Scott Smith. (Moosic’s WNEP-TV) n Thailand’s ruling junta said it would pay traffic police officers to refuse bribes. “We want to change perceptions and practices and to reward those who show they are clean,” Police Major General Adul Narongsak said after awarding two officers $310 for refusing a $3 bribe. “We encourage people to take photographs as evidence.” (Reuters)

Playing Doctor Walter Fisher filed a $100,000 lawsuit against Ontario’s William Osler Health System, which oversees Brampton Civic Hospital, as well as his doctor and several people and companies connected with the Canadian television show Saving Hope. Fisher said a man and woman watching the doctor perform his rectal exam were wearing medical attire but, he later learned, were really actors on the show. While lying on his back, “he could feel more than one set of hands on him,” Fishers’ lawyer said. (Toronto Sun) Compiled from mainstream news sources by Roland Sweet. Authentication on demand.

n Soccer player Peter Biaksangzuala, 23, died after scoring

a goal playing for India’s Bethlehem Vengthlang team by celebrating with a backflip. He broke his spine and spent five days in intensive care before succumbing. (Britain’s The Independent)

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Truck driver Gary Anderson, 58, died at a construction site in Jersey City, N.J., after being hit on the head by a 1-pound tape measure that fell from a worker’s tool belt on the 50th floor. A public safety official said Anderson wasn’t wearing a hard hat. (Associated Press)

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igpen, Harpo, Savage and Caesar are behind the bar, their ashes sealed inside the cylinders of the panhead and shovelhead motorcycles that they loved and rode while they were alive. These urns stand guard inside the red, gold and black brick house on Edison Street near 900 South that is home to the Barons Motorcycle Club, where a glowing soda-pop machine dispenses cans of beer, and on a Thursday night at 5 p.m., Barons are trickling in, the growling of Harleys marking their arrival. Founded in 1966, the Barons were for decades one of two well-known local motorcycle clubs. The other is the Sundowners. Now, though, motorcycle clubs are proliferating in Utah. According to law enforcement, the number of motorcycle club members in Zion has shot up by 300 percent in the past five years. There is little hard data to support this figure, though

Lawmakers are trying to drive biker gangs out of Utah.

By Colby Frazier cfrazier@cityweekly.net

from his perch, Ron “Dirtbag” Simmons, president of the Barons, says this number looks more like 1,000 percent. “There used to be three patch clubs: us, the Sundowners and the Vietnam Vets started, then came the Bandidos, and now there’s 10 [to] 15,” says Dirtbag, who, along with Barons Vice President Lebowski and former Barons president Parker, was interviewed on a Sunday morning over breakfast at a bar on State Street. “Every day I see another patch.” But besides having more bearded, leather-jacketed, patch-wearing, motorcycle-riding men on the streets of Utah, the presence of these clubs has resulted in little trouble. No one is more aware of this than the Barons, which, its ranking officers say, is a lot like a club that a pack of children would build in the backyard: a group of people who think alike, live alike and share a passion for motorcycles. Dirtbag says the rough and carefree days of the 1960s, fun as they were, are simply a thing of the past. “Times have changed,” he says. “And there are probably some groups that still try to abide by that ’60s mentality, and it just doesn’t work.” But, struck by the increasing number of motorcycle clubs in Utah, some in the law-enforcement community have resolved to take a stand. In July, during a meeting of the state legislature’s Law Enforcement & Criminal Justice Interim Committee, lawmakers fielded a nearly hour-long presentation from Utah

Austen Diamond

Barons President Ron “Dirtbag” Simmons

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NOVEMBER 27, 2014 | 17

The Barons have had their clubhouse on Edison Street since 1976. As Dirtbag walked around the clubhouse one October evening, he pointed out a spot where the club’s mascot, a Doberman named Max, is buried. Dirtbag says Max used to play fetch with a 15-pound bowling ball. “Max would run after that and grab it with his teeth, slide on his paws, and then he’d bring it back, and if you weren’t paying attention, drop it on your toe,” Dirtbag says. Dirtbag spots a neighbor dog and apologizes: he has to go say hi. He addresses the dog in a sweet, highpitched voice, trying to lure it to the fence so he can pet it. A few minutes later, one of Dirtbag’s brothers (a fellow Baron) shows up and reveals a new set of motorcycle handlebars in his trunk. “Alright!’ Dirtbag barks. He explains that his brother is building him an outrageously fast bike. When it’s done, Dirtbag will have six motorcycles in riding condition.

of all outlaw motorcycle gangs.” “They tend to kind of host everybody,” Critser says. “We’re not really sure if they think they’re Switzerland or what the deal is.” And Ray says that just because law-enforcement agencies haven’t seen a rise in crime relating to motorcycle gangs doesn’t mean it’s not happening. “What you find in the OMG community is a lot of the crimes are committed against each other, so it’s not reported to police,” Ray says. “They police themselves; the public is caught in the crossfire.” All of this talk of violence, gun-running and drug trafficking doesn’t resonate with Lebowski, vice president of the Barons. “This isn’t Sons of Anarchy,” says Lebowski, who has long graying hair and arms covered in tattoos, adding that he suspects the hit FX TV show is responsible for informing Ray’s beliefs. “People watch that and they think that’s what happens. You realize how long we’d last if we did the stuff that they do on TV? We wouldn’t last.” Ray denies that Sons of Anarchy has anything to do with his desire for a new law. And he insists that the presence of Mongols, who are presently under a federal indictment, is evidence enough that any rise in motorcycle gangs must be pre-empted by strict laws. “You can’t say, ‘Look, I’m a Mongol, but Utah Mongols are pretty nice guys,’ ” Ray says. “If you’re in an outlaw motorcycle gang, you’re into criminal things.” Statements like these are exactly what have the motorcycle community worried that they’ll be targeted by law enforcement just for looking a certain way. “It’s just smoke and mirrors is all that is,” Lebowski says. And the Barons, he says, are not “guys that run around and do irreparable damage to the community. We’re talking about guys sitting on $20,000, $30,000 motorcycles that like to ride. These are guys that are stand-ups in the community. They’re not some lowlifes that crawled under a rock and decided to be bad boys.” The committee took up the question of motorcycle gangs again in October. At this meeting, Eric Stine, education coordinator for the Davis County chapter of American Bikers Aiming Toward Education (ABATE), told the committee that lumping motorcyclists—even

Outlaws on Edison Street

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County Sheriff’s Sgt. Lane Critser, who told them that outlaw motorcycle gangs are on the rise in Utah. He also related a string of titillating stories about violent outlaw motorcycle gangs, known as OMGs. But none of the shootouts, sweeping drug-trafficking arrests and gun-running stories happened in the Beehive State. Critser acknowledged as much early on during the hearing, saying that the only large case he’s ever heard of in the state of Utah involving motorcycle gangs came in 1999 when several Sundowners were indicted on various federal charges. But Critser went on to detail multiple harrowing episodes across California and Nevada that he has been involved with. Many of these large arrests involved national motorcycle clubs like the Bandidos, Mongols, Vagos and Hell’s Angels—all of which have chapters in Utah, with the exception of the Hell’s Angels. It is this migration into Utah in recent years by national clubs that has law enforcement on its toes. Critser said at the July meeting that these clubs are making a play for dominance in Utah. “It’s like a gold rush,” Critser says. “Everybody’s trying to get here and establish domination over the state so they can run a variety of criminal activities and make the money in the state.” Comments like this from Critser, however, aren’t anchored by statistics. According to a lieutenant with the state’s Department of Public Safety, despite the rising numbers of motorcycle clubs and members, no uptick in outlaw motorcycle gang crime has occurred in Utah. “Right now there isn’t any solid data to show that more crime has been committed by outlaw motorcycle gangs,” says Lt. Jared Garcia, who noted that motorcycle gangs, like all gangs, see increasing numbers right along with an increase in the population as a whole. And in Utah, the population is booming. Critser didn’t return calls seeking comment. But Rep. Paul Ray, R-Clearfield, who put the “gang issues” matter Clockwise from top: on the agenda, promises to introduce gang legislation in the upcoming W.C. Wheelz looks on as Gov. session that he says will include language on motorcycle gangs. Scott M. Matheson repeals Since that July meeting, Ray has met with representatives from sevUtah’ s helmet law in 1977; eral motorcycle clubs, including the Barons. Dirtbag says that Ray told Savage, an early member of him that, when his proposed law is penned, Dirtbag will get to take a the Barons leading a helmet look before lawmakers do. For this, the motorcycle clubs are glad. protest ride; W.C. Wheelz The Barons have a long history of sticking up for themselves, whether that is in a barroom, or on the floor of the state capitol. That Dirtbag knows that more and more national clubs are setting up shop in Utah. Some guy ripping down the freeway on his motorcycle, hair blowing helmet-free in the might even contain men who break the law. But Salt Lake City is Dirtbag’s home; he and wind, can put the majority of his thanks into the laps of the Barons. the rest of the Barons live here and, just like everyone else, want to keep living here. In And they don’t want any law to lump them in with criminal street gangs—an order to do this, Dirtbag and his fellow Barons simply get along and contribute to their occurrence that would only increase the harassment motorcycle riders who wear community. The neighborhood, a half a block off of State Street, is one of the safest in the jackets emblazoned with patches say they already face. city, Dirtbag says. The Barons do an annual toy drive for Primary Children’s Hospital and “That’s why we’re active,” Dirtbag says. “Because every time I go out on a Sunday a blood drive for the American Red Cross. drive on my bike, to get pulled over, field-carded and get detained for an hour while This ability to get along has been noticed by Critser, who at the July meeting at the they run warrant checks and all that ... it’s cumbersome. It’s a pain in the ass.” state capitol told lawmakers that for some reason, the Barons “are more of an associate

ones that wear three-piece motorcycle gang patches and look tough—into the category of a criminal gang would be a lot like condemning all Catholic priests because some are pedophiles. And he reminded the committee that they, too, are in a gang. “The other day, I was looking up the definition of ‘gang,’ and it’s really hard when you start putting people in groups,” he said. “Because, quite frankly, you are a gang of legislators based on the technical Webster definition.”

Austen Diamond

Laws Suck”

One person who agrees with that sentiment is Mike Dmitrich, a former Democratic state representative and senator. In the 1970s, the Barons found support in Dmitrich and other Democratic lawmakers in their crusade to block helmet laws. “It was very enjoyable working with them,” Dmitrich says. “All that negative stuff about motorcycle gangs really just didn’t apply to them.” The abolition of helmet laws in Utah, Dmitrich says, was largely due to the Barons being able to convince lawmakers that the protective gear muffled sounds, cut back on peripheral vision and are heavy and uncomfortable to wear. There was a helmet law in Utah in the early ’70s, but according to Ralph “Teach” Elrod—a founder, former president and current member of the Barons’ Nomad chapter, which places heavy emphasis on traveling and has members that don’t reside in Salt Lake City—it was a patchwork of regulations that required riders to wear helmets while riding on some roads with a speed limit of 35 mph or above, but not on others. And in the mid 1970s, the federal government threatened to withhold highway funding from states that refused to enact stricter laws. So the Barons—a fledgling motorcycle club then stocked with young men intent on partying and riding—morphed into a political machine intent on taking down helmet laws altogether. “We were on the phone and going to meetings and doing everything we could to figure out how to fight it,” says Teach, who in 2013 published a memoir, Kick Start: Memories of an Outlaw Biker. “And when it came down to the bottom line, every state in the union had folded except California, Illinois and Utah.” Most states had some type of helmet laws on the books. And in an effort to get states like Utah to institute a blanket helmet law—requiring all riders to wear helmets in all conditions—the federal government threatened to withhold 10 percent of its highway funding. The Barons were a large reason Utah didn’t give in. As Utah lawmakers considered their choices, they did so with galleries packed full of motorcyclists dangling their helmets over the railing, and the rumbling of thousands of motorcycles outside. Teach recalls that one protest ride was so large that when he parked his bike at the capitol, he surveyed the valley below and could still see bikers turning onto State Street from roughly 1300 South, near Liberty Park, where the rally began. “We wanted to make sure they didn’t get a thing done until they took care of our business,” says W.C. Wheelz, who as a young Baron became the club’s No. 1 man in the political rabble-rousing department. Wheelz raised money by selling “Helmet Laws Suck” bumper stickers, and found allies in lawmakers like Dmitrich and Sens. Ed Beck and Rex Black. The Barons, with help from the Sundowners, also formed the local chapter of motorcycle

Left to right:

Austen Diamond

18 | NOVEMBER 27, 2014

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political-action group ABATE, which back then stood for A Brotherhood Against Totalitarian Enactments. But Wheelz says he soon realized that any victory in Utah would be short-lived if the federal government didn’t stop withholding funds. Over the next several months, the Barons, with the help of the motorcycle magazine Easyriders, organized a protest ride in Washington, D.C. In the autumn of 1975, the protest came together and several Barons hit the open road, bound east. Once there, the Barons rallied, partied and roared around the nation’s capital on their Harleys with East Coast clubs like the Wheels of Soul and the Ching a Ling. According to Teach’s book, the headline in The Washington Post on Sept. 2, 1975, read: “Hundreds of bearded, bedraggled, beer-swigging motorcyclists from around the nation circled the White House and the U.S. Capital yesterday.” “The only way was to fight it head on and that’s what we did,” Teach says. “I think it was a pretty special time in American history.” The feds eventually caved, making it impossible to withhold the highway funding in lieu of stricter helmet laws. But the Barons’ work wasn’t done. They returned to Utah eyeballing outright repeal of the state’s helmet law. Wheelz says the lawmakers he worked with took a liking to the bikers. “They went to the wall for us to make it happen,” he says. “I think I made them believers.” More than three decades have passed since the helmet law was repealed, and Dmitrich still remembers the former schoolteacher “Teach,” and the “shaker” Wheelz. Once Dmitrich got behind the Barons’ cause, he says, they got behind him. After one night of making laws at the capitol, Dmitrich, who represented Carbon County, hit the Salt Lake City bars. At one establishment, Dmitrich says, he got into a “little argument.” Word of the incident made it to Wheelz, who the following day told Dmitrich to let him know if anything like that happened again. “They took care of their friends, in other words,” Dmitrich says.

The Barons Clubhouse on Edison Street; the Barons’ three-piece patch; Ralph “ Teach” Elrod Top: A memorial ride

“They were just going to make sure no one screwed with me. I have a lot of respect for them.” With the helmet law issue behind him, Wheelz, a native of Montana, grew bored in Salt Lake City. He re-enrolled in college, finishing near the top of his class, then attended law school. He now lives in Washington State. For Wheelz, the seeds of discontent surrounding helmet laws came the first time he crossed the Montana border helmet-less into Idaho and got the runaround by cops. But he says his dislike of getting harassed by the police was secondary to a larger idea: freedom. “I used to get on my motorcycle and I’d ride over the mountain and down across the prairie and feel the wind blowing through my hair,” he says. “It was that simple. It was about feeling freedom, god, whatever you want to call it.”

“ We’ re not going to harass people just to harass them, but we’ re going to watch them very carefully and we’ re going to let them know we’ re watching them.”

NOWHERE AND NOTHING TO HIDE

DON’T VISIT UTAH The thousands of bikers who swarmed the state capitol in the

_Rep. Paul Ray, R-Clearfield, who plans to introduce in 2015 a bill that would clamp down on motorcycle gangs

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Teach says Ray’s law reminds him a lot of the 1970s, when people were simply afraid of the Barons because they were different. Now, just as then, Teach is proud to see the Barons greeting this law head on. “It does worry me,” Teach says of Ray’s plans. “I’m glad to see the club is taking a stand; standing up to stop this before it all gets started.” No, the Barons aren’t Switzerland, as Critser suggested at the July meeting. They’re an “outlaw” motorcycle club, with a lot of fuzziness around the exact definition of outlaw. But outlaw or not, there’s a reason why decades ago, the Barons elected to not sew one patch onto their jackets that law enforcement places a special emphasis on: the 1 percent diamond patch that is widely considered to be the defining symbol of an outlaw biker. When the vote was cast all those years ago, Dirtbag says, he voted to wear the diamond patch. But he lost, and he says now that the prevailing wisdom of the club was correct in not wanting to put a target on the back every Baron. Barons Vice President Lebowski says the clichés of outlaw bikers highlighted on television, and in the speeches given by Critser, aren’t accurate. And he wonders if the problem lies with a public that doesn’t want to let go of the image of the outlaw biker. “Things have evolved and we’ve changed, but society doesn’t want us to change,” Lebowski says. “What we’ve learned along the course of time is you used to be able to outrun the cops. Well, you can’t outrun a radio anymore. Everybody’s got a camera. I mean, come on. We know we get watched and we get photographed. We’re not stupid. We know what’s going on, but we’ve got nothing to hide.” CW

1970s haven’t yet paid that level of attention to Ray’s promise for a new and improved gang law that he says will in part be directed at motorcycle gangs, which he considers the Barons to be. Ray says the Barons’ and other motorcyclists’ political activism is less about sticking up for themselves by participating in the legislative process and more a show of “our force versus your force.” “These guys are obviously not easily intimated,” he says. “They don’t mind a good fight.” He believes that the presence of colors (patches on jackets)— and bikers’ willingness to show up on capitol hill wearing those patches—proves that outlaw motorcycle gangs are indeed gangs, and are also brazen. “What we’re saying,” Ray says, is “if you wear your colors and identify yourself with a gang, you’ll be identified as a gang member.” To the Barons and Stine, Ray’s words sound a lot like a “dress code” law that could unfairly lump law-abiding motorcyclists into a gang. Stine says he’s been impressed with Ray’s willingness to include motorcyclists in the discussion. But he does hope Ray takes a few of ABATE’s suggestions. Foremost among them, Stine says, is to build into the bill some anti-profiling language. Stine would also like to make the so-called gang list a public record, and see a path built into the law that would allow motorcyclists to rid their names from this list. “We do need to get involved with it this year,” Stine says. “We need to try to ensure that motorcyclists aren’t singled out and profiled and treated as gang members because we wear the same clothing.” Ray isn’t sure where his bill will end up on these matters. But he wants gang members, whether they are bikers, Bloods or Crips, to know that gangs won’t be tolerated in Utah. “We’re going to make it known that you’re not coming to Utah and causing problems,” he says. “We’re not going to stand for it here. We’re not going to harass people just to harass them, but we’re going to watch them very carefully and we’re going to let them know we’re watching them.” At the July meeting, Ray told his fellow lawmakers a personal anecdote that could be considered as one way to deal with bikers. On a Sunday afternoon prior to the meeting, Ray was driving down the freeway, bound for a Redbox movie-rental kiosk, when he spotted a dozen Hombres motorcycle club members from Washington State. They were riding two abreast, Ray said, and were “weaving” in and out of the carpool lane. Ray said he jotted down their license plate numbers and called them in to Critser. “That’s the kind of thing, when they feel that harassment the minute they hit the state line,” Ray said of his tactic.

As Critser outlined all of the ills that motorcycle gangs around the West have caused, he told a story about the Gypsy Joker, an outlaw motorcycle club, and a brush with the law nearly a decade ago in Oregon. Oregon newspapers say a Gresham, Ore., officer held 28 Gypsy Joker members at gunpoint for an hour. The bikers filed civil-rights complaints, including for unlawful search and seizure. The small town settled with the Gypsy Joker club out of court for $300,000. Critser says efforts need to be undertaken to train law enforcement to deal with how “savvy these individuals are,” and to “make sure all of [law enforcement’s] ducks are in a row.” Critser did point to a few recent instances in Utah where outlaw motorcycle gangs drew some media attention. One came this past summer when the Barons held their annual run in Wasatch County. At the same time, the Rainbow Family gathering—a massive communal campout—was happening nearby. The Barons invited the Gypsy Jokers on their run, and a fight broke out between some of the Jokers and the campers. Critser says he doesn’t know who picked the fight, but some of the Jokers were arrested on DUI, drug offenses and possession of deadly weapons. In 2013, the Mongols and Vagos had a brief clash in Roy at a funeral home. According to news reports, a member of the Mongols had died in a motorcycle crash. Police had the area staked out and, at some point, Vagos showed up. Words were exchanged, but no fights occurred and no arrests were made. In 2008, Critser says, the Bandidos had a run in Moab, and in the past five years, the Mongols took a trip to Wayne County. But if the problem for Critser and Ray is that motorcycle clubs, gangs or outlaws are coming to Utah on bikes, Teach has some advice: Stop running advertisements on TV telling people to visit Utah.

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“ We’ re going to make it known that you’ re not coming to Utah and causing problems. We’ re not going to stand for it here.”

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20 | NOVEMBER 27, 2014

ESSENTIALS

the

Entertainment Picks NOV. 27-Dec. 3

Complete Listings Online @ CityWeekly.net

FRIDAY 11.28

SATURDAY 11.29

TUESDAY 12.2

The triennial art faculty exhibition currently on display at the Utah Museum of Fine Arts is not only an immensely exciting show filled with wonderful and diverse works, but also a testament to the exceptional talent and vision of the art faculty currently working at the University of Utah. New Narratives: Recent Work by University of Utah Faculty is an affirmation of those who are in the demanding position of training and leading the next generation of artists. The concept of “new narratives,” chosen by curator Katie Lee Koven, is an effectively broad theme for a large exhibition, representing many types and styles of works of art appealing to a vast spectrum of viewers. “These artists and the artwork they have produced empower visitors to create their own narratives,” Koven says in a gallery statement. In the case of Joseph Marotta and his collaged photographs like “Palais Royal with Blue Space” and “Artifact 5,” the narrative might be of presence and place. Van Chu’s “Avalanche” and “Aerial Landscapes”—works behind glass that look like sandstorms—could begin a narrative into consciousness, while Al Denyer’s manufactured aerial views “Arctic I, II, and III” may initiate a narrative of dimension and altered reality. Simon Blundell’s layered and spliced colorful photographs “Margot Margeaux,” “Forsaken Memory” and “6 Frames All Blues” are certainly cause for a narrative of memory, cognition and awareness of self, and Lewis J. Crawford’s thoughtful digital projection “Geometry from Public Space, Sound & Vision” leads the audience in a powerful narrative on the reality of perception and truth. (Ehren Clark) New Narratives: Recent Work by University of Utah Faculty @ Utah Museum of Fine Arts, 410 Campus Center Drive, 801-581-7332, through Jan. 11, $7-&9. UMFA.Utah.edu

There are very few times in life when you get to enter a “judgment-free” zone. One of these rare opportunities occurs not just once but twice this weekend, at the annual Utah Symphony Messiah Sing-In at Abravanel Hall. Here’s your chance to sing your heart out as part of a choir that numbers in the four figures. With that many people vocalizing together, your voice won’t stand out. Besides, the entire point of the enterprise is that everybody who shows up gets to sing. If you don’t have a Messiah score, they’ll sell you one. Go ahead and unleash your inner The Voice contestant and belt out one of the greatest pieces of music ever written: the Hallelujah Chorus. To offset your amateur status, there will be professionals on hand to help make Handel’s masterwork a memorable evening on both Saturday and Sunday, beginning at 7 p.m. The Utah Symphony will be under the baton of Thierry Fischer, accompanied by the Utah Symphony Chorus. Between choruses, sit back and enjoy soloists Melissa Heath (soprano), Abigail Levis (alto), Tyson Miller (tenor) and Christopher Clayton (baritone). The Sing-In has become an annual event that kicks off the holiday season, with lyrics Handel lifted straight from the Old Testament foretelling the coming of a redeemer. Soprano, alto, tenor or bass, this weekend is your chance to sing glorious music without anybody looking at you funny or asking you to stop. (Geoff Griffin) Messiah Sing-In @ Abravanel Hall, 123 W. South Temple, 801-355-2787, Nov. 29-30, 7 p.m., $10-$32. UtahSymphony.org

Jim Steenburgh’s book was born out of idle conversations on ski lifts. When random people casually inquired about his occupation and found out he was a meteorologist, they couldn’t help but wonder if he thought Utah’s ski industry slogan was true. Does Utah really have the “greatest snow on earth”? According to Steenburgh, professor of atmospheric science at the University of Utah, his book—Secrets of the Greatest Snow on Earth—is geared toward powder hounds of all stripes. He wanted to create a primer for all those seeking perfect conditions in-bounds or out, so they can better understand their mountain playground and its weather, including avalanche safety, historical norms, records and even basic forecasting. He does say that Utah has the greatest snow on earth, but, being a scientist, Steenburgh also seeks to dispel some long-held misconceptions as well—such as the one that our snow is “dry.” The key is actually how it falls to the ground: The heavier, wetter snow falls first in a storm, and the lighter, drier flakes follow. The result? Perfect layers for ski flotation. Then there’s the fact that we routinely get what he likes to call “Goldilocks Storms”—not too big and not too little, but just right. By his calculations, a resort like Alta gets nearly 20 10-inch storms per season—approximately one enviable powder day every 10 days, enough fresh snow so that everyone, even the casual skier, can regularly catch a glorious day of spraying the fine powder like mist into the air behind them. (Jacob Stringer) Jim Steenburgh: Secrets of the Greatest Snow on Earth @ S.J. Quinney College of Law, 332 S. 1400 East, University of Utah, 801-585-3440, Dec. 2, 12:15 p.m., free. KingsEnglish.com

New Narratives: Recent Work by University of Utah Faculty

Utah Symphony: Messiah Sing-In

Jim Steenburgh: Secrets of the Greatest Snow on Earth

WEDNESDAY 12.3

Jenny Morgan: Full Circle An artistic portrait is a window into its subject that is far more incisive, in its own way, than any photograph. The paintings of Jenny Morgan conform to the conventions of portraiture but also blur them—literally and figuratively—to transcend mere documentation and reveal something highly personal about existing in the world. Her figures have a palpable presence, returning the gaze of the viewer almost confrontationally. The former Salt Laker has only painted herself and people she knows personally, but identity seems to have begun to be erased, as a result of the blurring and the way the subjects are posed. Morgan’s curator for this show, Ivar Zeile, is a former Salt Lake City artist who owns the Plus Gallery in Denver with his wife, Karen. Morgan is represented by Plus Gallery, as well as Driscoll Babcock Galleries in New York City, where she lives and works. She has won numerous awards, and her work has been featured in numerous publications including The New York Times, Village Voice and Playboy. Morgan’s works are showing concurrently with fellow New Yorker Benjamin Cottam’s Crayon Drawings. Cottam has taken subjects from the news in his works, utilizing imagery from the Ferguson shooting and the local Saratoga Springs police shooting of Darrien Hunt. Both artists were raised Mormon, and the spirituality in their works makes for a fascinating contrast. (Brian Staker) Jenny Morgan: Full Circle @ CUAC, 175 E. 200 South, 385-215-6768, through Jan. 10, free. CUArtCenter.org

A&E

big SHINY ROBOT Booze & Batman This Christmas season calls for Caped Crusader gifts and cocktail pairings. By Bryan Young comments@cityweekly.net @swankmotron

Holy Holiday Spirit, Batman! These gifts will put a grin on any geek’s face.

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Bryan Young is the editor-inchief of BigShinyRobot.com

holiday whiskey in front of a roaring fire and reading about the epic struggles between Batman and his greatest foe. I’d also recommend the equally excellent Death in the Family, which documents Joker’s brutal murder of the second Robin, Jason Todd. The books you need to get for the Bat-fan in your house who’s enjoying the show Gotham are the collected editions of Ed Brubaker and Greg Rucka’s Gotham Central, which tells the story of the police as they contend with a world where Batman exists. They’re gritty and real in the way we want our world of Batman to be, and that’s why it would pair so well with a bottle of Jack Daniel’s. My final recommendation for the burgeoning Bat-nerd is Jeph Loeb and Tim Sale’s pair of masterworks, The Long Halloween and Dark Victory. Both tell a continuing story of Batman’s early days, and read like the comic-book equivalent of The Godfather. The moody and brilliant stories take place in the world of gangsters, making them a perfect complement to the dark rums of the Prohibition era. Whatever booze and Batman combination you pick as a gift, be grateful you’ll be there to share it w ith them—unlike Batman, whose parents were murdered in an alley, assuring that he’ll spend the rest of his holidays alone. CW

It’s a beautifully packaged set of brandnew editions of three of Batman’s greatest stories: Frank Miller’s The Dark Knight Returns (which is said to be a chief inspiration of Scott Snyder for the upcoming Batman vs. Superman: Dawn of Justice); Hush, written by Jeph Loeb and drawn by Jim Lee; and The Court of Owls, by Scott Snyder and Greg Capullo. The books would be the perfect Batman sampler for someone who is new to the character, and pair well with a bottle of red wine. I’d recommend a nice Chianti, preferably DaVinci’s. The perfect complement to a bottle of High West’s Campfire whiskey would be the set containing Batman: Death of the Family book and a Joker mask. In recent times, the Joker cut the skin of his own face off and attached it to his head with a leather strap. This book documents his return in that guise, and the set comes with a Joker face skin and wig to wear. It’s exactly what a person would want to wear while sipping a

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very year, we look around our favorite stores and websites, struggling for gift ideas for the fellow nerds in our lives. But since it’s Batman’s 75th anniversary, there is a whole bunch of great Batman merchandise out there to celebrate—and it’s stuff you and your loved ones are going to want. And what better way to give a nerdy gift than to pair it with adult beverages? Perhaps the biggest-ticket item on any list involving Batman this year is the complete adventures from the 1960s Batman TV series, starring Adam West and Burt Ward. I didn’t think this collection would ever come out due to ongoing rights and licensing issues, but the set has finally been released. You and your giftees will have no greater fun than watching all 120 episodes of Biff! Bang! Pow! fights in tights between Batman and guys like Caesar Romero’s Joker, Frank Gorshin’s Riddler and Vincent Price’s Egghead. And the fights have never looked better than in these newly remastered episodes. I advise pairing it with a six-pack of your favorite locally brewed beer. Next on the list is the Batman 75th Anniversar y Commemorative Collection.

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moreESSENTIALS

Complete listings online @ cityweekly.net

SATURDAY 11.29 Salt Lake Freedom Film & Storytelling Festival

The term “film festival”— especially in the home of Sundance—may instantly inspire assumptions about edgy content and a decidedly adult sensibility. But not all film festivals aim for the same audiences—nor are they all just film festivals. Now in its 15th semi-annual incarnation, the Salt Lake Freedom Film and Storytelling Festival combines short and feature films with seasonal music, all with a family-friendly focus. The festival hosts three individual sessions at Fort Douglas’ Post Theater, and showcases everything from documentary (Pieces of the Wind, about local artist and festival organizer Brian Jackson Fetzer), animation (the 1982 Oscar-nominated short The Snowman) and classic liveaction (the 1951 Alistair Sim version of A Christmas Carol, plus a brand-new adaptation of Jane Austen’s Persuasion). Add a “Joy to the World” concert sing-along and the new musical presentation “Christmas Lights,” and you’ve got a wonderfully inspirational start to the holiday season. (Scott Renshaw) Salt Lake Freedom Film & Storytelling Festival @ Fort Douglas Post Theater, 245 Fort Douglas Blvd., 801-532-2766, Nov. 29, 9 a.m., 1 p.m. & 6:30 p.m., $3-$5 per session. SLCstoryfest.wordpress.com

FRIDAY 11.28 PERFORMING ARTS Celebration of Christ, Capitol Theatre, 50 W. 200 South, Salt Lake City, 801-355-2787 Shrek the Musical, Egyptian Theatre, 328 Main, Park City, 435-649-9371 Laughing Stock Improv Comedy, Off Broadway Theatre, 272 S. Main, Salt Lake City, 801-355-4628 Dan Waldis Jazz Christmas, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. 300 South, Salt Lake City, 801355-2787 Off the Wall Improv, The Ziegfeld Theater, 3934 Washington Blvd., Ogden, 801-954-2787

LITERARY ARTS

Jeff Metcalf: Requiem for a Living and Josh Hanagarne: The World’s Strongest Librarian, Weller Book Works

SUNDAY 11.30 PERFORMING ARTS

Messiah Sing-In, Abravanel Hall Shrek the Musical, Egyptian Theatre, Park City

MONDAY 12.1 PERFORMING ARTS

LITERARY ARTS

Fiddler on The Roof, Rose Wagner Center Molly Mouse’s Sugar Plum Debut, Rose Wagner Center

Collectors Book Salon, Weller Book Works, 665 E. 600 South, Salt Lake City, 801-328-2586

TUESDAY 12.2

SATURDAY 11.29 PERFORMING ARTS Messiah Sing-In, Abravanel Hall, 123 W. South Temple, Salt Lake City, 801-355-2787 Celebration of Christ, Capitol Theatre Shrek the Musical, Egyptian Theatre, Park City Salt Lake Freedom Film & Storytelling Festival, Fort Douglas Post Theater, 245 Fort Douglas Blvd., 801-532-2766 A Year With Frog & Toad, The King’s English Bookshop, 1511 S. 1500 East, Salt Lake City, 801484-9100 Laughing Stock Improv Comedy, Off Broadway Theatre Dan Waldis Jazz Christmas, Rose Wagner Center Molly Mouse’s Sugar Plum Debut, Rose Wagner Center The Improvable Comedy Improv Show, Playbills’ Theater, 455 W. 1700 South, Clearfield, 801-382-7875 Steve Soelberg, Wiseguys Ogden, 269 25th St., Ogden, 801-622-5588 Keith Barany, Wiseguys West Valley, 2194 W. 3500 South, West Valley City, 801-463-2909

PERFORMING ARTS

Jazz Ensembles, Libby Gardner Hall, 1375 E. Presidents Circle, Salt Lake City, 801-581-7100 Fiddler on The Roof, Rose Wagner Center Molly Mouse’s Sugar Plum Debut, Rose Wagner Center

LITERARY ARTS

Jim Steenburgh: Secrets of the Greatest Snow on Earth, S.J. Quinney College of Law, 332 S. 1400 East, Salt Lake City, 801-585-3440

WEDNESDAY 12.3 PERFORMING ARTS

Celebration: Salt Lake Symphonic Winds, AllSaints Episcopal Church, 1710 Foothill Drive, Salt Lake City, 801-214-5442 Wind Ensemble, Libby Gardner Hall Fiddler on The Roof, Rose Wagner Center

VISUAL ARTS CONTINUING 11.27-12.3

Catherine Yass: Wall, Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, 20 S. West Temple, Salt Lake City, 801-328-4201, Tuesdays-Saturdays through Nov. 29

The Urban Indian Center of Salt Lake Presents:

The 25th Native American Holiday Arts Market December 6 & 7, 2014 Saturday: 10:00 am to 6:00 pm Sunday: 10:00 am to 5:00 pm

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Vendors will be offering both traditional and contemporary Native American goods including jewelry, pottery, paintings and more.

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moreESSENTIALS Anthony Granato: Life, Urban Arts Gallery, 137 S. Rio Grande St., Salt Lake City, 801-651-3937, Tuesdays-Saturdays through Nov. 30 Moksha: Photography by Fazal Sheikh, Utah Museum of Fine Arts, 410 Campus Center Drive, Salt Lake City, 801-581-7332, Tuesdays-Sundays through Nov. 30 Howard Clark Scholarship Exhibition, Gittins Gallery, 375 S. 1530 East, 801-581-8677, Salt Lake City, Monday-Friday through Dec. 5 Gerardo Meneses Jr.: Natureâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Four Seasons, Salt Lake Main Library, 210 E. 400 South, Salt Lake City, 801-524-8200, Mondays-Sundays through Dec. 5 Ryan Perkins & Max Kelly: The Lonesome Lightbox Boys, Salt Lake Main Library, 210 E. 400 South, Salt Lake City, 801-524-8200, Mondays-Sundays through Dec. 5 Amy Jorgensen: Far From the Tree, Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, 20 S. West Temple, Salt Lake City, 801-328-4201, TuesdaysSaturdays through Dec. 6 East High School Annual Photography Exhibition, Salt Lake Main Library, 210 E. 400 South, Salt Lake City, 801-524-8200, MondaysSundays through Dec. 7 Bikuben, Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, 20 S. West Temple, Salt Lake City, 801-328-4201, Tuesdays-Saturdays through Dec. 20 Laleh Ghotbi: Painting What I Love, Salt Lake City Library Corinne & Jack Sweet branch, 455 F St., Salt Lake City, 801-594-8651, MondaysSaturdays though Dec. 27 Dia de los Muertos, Salt Lake City Library Chapman branch, 577 S. 900 West, Salt Lake City, 801-594-8623, Mondays-Saturdays though Dec. 30 Enrique Vera: Landscapes of Northeast Mexico, Mestizo Gallery, 631 W. North Temple, Suite 700, 801-596-0500, through Jan. 2 The Horse, Natural History Museum of Utah, 301 Wakara Way, Salt Lake City, 801-581-4303, through Jan. 4 Escape from Reality, Slusser Gallery 447 E. 100 South, Salt Lake City, Mondays-Fridays through Jan. 9 Feminine Archetypes Around the World and Through the Ages, Salt Lake City Library Sprague branch, 2131 S. 100 East, Salt Lake City, 801-594-8640, Mondays-Sundays though Jan. 9 Statewide Annual 2014: Painting & Sculpture, Rio Gallery, 300 S. Rio Grande St.,

Complete listings online @ cityweekly.net

801-245-7272, Mondays-Fridays through Jan. 9 Benjamin Cottam: Canyon Drawings, CUAC, 175 E. 200 South, 385-215-6768, WednesdaysSaturdays through Jan. 10 Jenny Morgan: Full Circle, CUAC, 175 E. 200 South, 385-215-6768, Wednesdays-Saturdays through Jan. 10 William Lamson: Hydrologies, Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, 20 S. West Temple, Salt Lake City, 801-328-4201, Tuesdays-Saturdays through Jan. 10 New Narratives: Recent Work by U of U Art Faculty, Utah Museum of Fine Arts, TuesdaysSundays through Jan. 11 Kent Budge: Natural Order, Alice Gallery, 617 E. South Temple, Salt Lake City, 801-245-7272, Mondays-Fridays through Jan. 16 Body Worlds & The Cycle of Life, The Leonardo, 209 E. 500 South, Salt Lake City, 801531-9800, Mondays-Saturdays through Feb. 1 Conrad Bakker: Salt 10, Utah Museum of Fine Arts, 410 Campus Center Drive, Salt Lake City, 801-581-7332, Tuesdays-Sundays through Feb. 8 Block Plan Series: Provo, Brigham Young University Museum of Art, 500 Campus Drive, Provo, 801-422-8287, Mondays-Saturdays through April 18. No Fixed Address, The Leonardo, 209 E. 500 South, Salt Lake City, 801-531-9800, MondaysSundays through May 15

EVEN STEVENS

Eating for Two

DINE

Let us build your cheesďż˝ boardďż˝ this holiday season!

Even Stevens feeds more than just its customers. By Ted Scheffler comments@cityweekly.net @critic1

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insecure. The bottom line: Buying Twice as nice: Purchasing the stuffed French a sandwich at Even Stevens helps. toast and other items at Even Stevens While the business model and Sandwiches helps feed the needy. charitable efforts behind Even Stevens is admirable and should be The pot roast dip is made with braised saluted, this is also a for-profit business, selling products to consumers just as turkey â&#x20AC;&#x153;pot roast,â&#x20AC;? Swiss cheese, red places like Subway doâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;albeit with much onion and jalapeĂąo jelly on lightly grilled better karma. So, how does Even Stevens sourdough slices. Sadly, the au jus that came alongside was thin and wateryâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; stack up strictly as a sandwich joint? Even Stevens is a funk y, hip place definitely not a worthy partner for that full of millennials (their term, not mine). super sandwich. The turkey noodle soup I tried was Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s definitely a â&#x20AC;&#x153;do-gooderâ&#x20AC;? vibe alive and well, but I have to say that enthusiasm so-so. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve tasted the same f lavors before, isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t always a substitute for competence. from a can. Normally, locally brewed Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve yet to visit Even Stevens when there beers and mimosas are offered, along with sodas, juices and such, but the wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t a service glitch of some sort. During a recent visit, my wife ordered operation currently canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t serve beer the Goat Getter salad ($7.95), which because someone forgot to renew the the Even Stevens menu says contains license with the DABC. Breakfast items fare much better. â&#x20AC;&#x153;spinach, arugula, grilled goat cheese, cranberries, toasted almonds and tangy Who wouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t love Even Stevenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s stuffed house vinaigrette.â&#x20AC;? I couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t detect French toast: two slices of raisin-walnut anything â&#x20AC;&#x153;grilledâ&#x20AC;? about the goat cheese French toast with a layer of bananacrumbled on top of the greens. But more cream cheese filling in bet ween and importantly, neither of us could suss out berry compote on top ($5.95)? Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a single leaf of arugula. When we asked also a killer breakfast burrito called the about that, an employee informed us that Graduate, with two eggs, a choice of bacon â&#x20AC;&#x153;spinach and arugula look alike.â&#x20AC;? Well, or sausage, cheddar cheese, spuds, onion, yes, sort of, but Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d stake my reputation as tomato, spinach and Russian dressing. a food writer that there was no arugula in What a way to begin the day! From a consumer point of view, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d that salad. But I like the sandwiches Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve eaten at have to say that, considering the $7 to Even Stevens. The Sloppy Tina ($6.75) is $9 prices, Even Stevens sandwiches are a spot-on vegetarian version of a sloppy a bit on the skimpy sideâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;definitely not Joe, made with mushroom and chickpeas overstuffed. But then, we must remind in a zippy tomato-based sauce. Had I ourselves that when weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re purchasing a not known what was in it, I couldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve sandwich at Even Stevens, weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re really been fooled into thinking I was eating buying two of them: one for ourselves, meat. There is also a meat loverâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sloppy and another for a hungry stranger. CW Joe ($6.95), a slow-simmered combo of beef and chorizo topped with pickled red Even Stevens Sandwiches 414 E. 200 South onions and served on a Kaiser roll. Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a faux pot roast sandwich on 385-355-9105 the menu, too, that is remarkably tasty. EvenStevens.com

| cityweekly.net |

s has been well documented, one of my favorite restaurants in past yearsâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;not just here in Utah, but in the entire United Statesâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;was The Metropolitan. Karen Olsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s haute cuisine establishment changed the way many Utahns thought about dining out, and although itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s been closed for a couple of years now, its effect on our cuisineâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;via the chefs and others who labored thereâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; is lasting. So I was a tad surprised when Olson reached out to tell me her latest restaurant venture was a sandwich joint. Would there be a foie gras sammich? I wondered. Well, not exactly. Olson has always been keen on making her community better, and now, sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s helping to feed those in need. Serving as project manager, Olson teamed up with founder/entrepreneur Steve Down (Financially Fit for Life, The Falls Event Centers, Miracle of Wealth, etc.), social media director Sara Day, marketing director Jamie Coat and others to create Even Stevens Sandwiches. Thanksgiving seems to be an especially fitting time to call attention to the work that Even Stevens is doing, as itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a time when many of us gorge ourselves on holiday fare, while others canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be sure where their next meal will come from. Maybe it will come from Even Stevens. The basic idea is a simple one: For every sandwich sold at Even Stevens, another is donated to local nonprofits helping to end hunger. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not exactly a one-to-one affair. That is, when you buy a Reuben sandwich, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re not buying that same sandwich for a homeless person. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a bit more streamlined: Food accounts are set up by Even Stevens for the nonprofits it serves. Then, at the end of each month, the number of sandwiches sold is tallied, and an equal amount of bulk sandwich ingredientsâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; turkey, cheese, bread, condiments, etc.â&#x20AC;&#x201D; is delivered, and volunteers are rallied to â&#x20AC;&#x153;build sandwiches and spread the love to individuals in need,â&#x20AC;? as Even Stevensâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; mission statement puts it. Sadly, there is no shortage of individuals in need. According to Utahns Against Hunger, 1 in 6 households in Utah struggles to afford enough food. Statistics from the Utah Food Bank say that 1 in 5 Utah kids are unsure where their next meal will come from, and 444,000 peopleâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;16 percent of Utahâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s populationâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;are food

| cityweekly.net |

| CITY WEEKLY |

26 | NOVEMBER 27, 2014

BEER, WINE & SPIRITS

Bottles of Cheer Span the globe with holiday sips. By Ted Scheffler comments@cityweekly.net @critic1

ow that the winter holiday season has kicked into full gear, I want to make sure I’m well-stocked with wines to offer friends and family as they stop by for a little holiday cheer. And—not that there’s anything wrong with cracking open bottles of domestic Chardonnay or Cabernet—I like to treat my guests to sips of something that they probably haven’t tried before. And so, this holiday season I’m spanning the globe to find interesting and provocative wines to drink. A new “power couple” in Spanish winemaking was born recently. Two wine-producing areas of Castilla y Leon in Northern Spain—D.O. Ribera del Duero and D.O. Rueda—announced a strategic partnership intended to promote and market the

region’s wines. Ribera is red and Rueda is white, so it seems like a natural coupling. Spanish wines continue to be good buys, with a lot of bang for not a lot of bucks. So, my holiday tables will be peppered with wines from Spain. Arrocal Ribera del Duero ($17.99) is a versatile blend of Tempranillo (95 percent), Cabernet Sauvignon (4 percent) and Merlot (1 percent) with lush, dark berry flavors and spicy bottom notes. The Wine Advocate awarded Arrocal 90 points for this one—not bad for an 18-buck wine. Or, track down a bottle of Veñedos Alonso del Yerro ($24) from Ribera del Duero. It weighs in at nearly 15 percent ABV—a powerful, concentrated wine albeit one with silky tannins. I think Verdejo from Spain is a good white wine to serve at holiday parties with cold seafood and shellfish or soft fresh cheeses. I’m partial to Martínsancho Verdejo ($17.99) from Rueda. The grapes are descendants of a 17th-century vineyard and are hand-picked. The wine is made from free-run juice and is very extracted and herbaceous; a crisp, delightful white wine. Heading down to Alsace, I’m a big fan of Willm Pinot Gris Réserve ($15.99), a dry, lovely Pinot Gris that is a great match for a wide range of foods, including holiday turkeys and hams. For an equally versatile holi-

Welcome Home Dinner 5:00pm to close monday-saturday

day wine—this one a Rosé—I find Le Cirque Grenache Gris ($13.99) irresistible. It’s produced by Les Vignerons de Tautavel Vingrau cooperative in the Côtes Catalanes appellation of France— just across the Pyrenees from Catalonia in Spain. There are flavors of ripe melon, some pineapple, and white peach on the palate—a real crowdpleaser. In Italy, I know I can always trust Cantine Buglioni to deliver great wines at easy-to-handle prices. I’m a lover of Buglioni Il Disperato ($18.90). It’s a still white wine made from Garganega grapes, with good structure, acidity, and fetching tropical f lavors—an especially good match for crudités and light appetizers during the holidays. Over in the New World, I count on Kim Crawford wines from New Zealand for quality and consistency. Tropical melon,

pineapple, and citrus flavors and aromas burst from a glass of Kim Crawford Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc ($15.99), and winemaker Anthony Wa l k en hor s t describes 2014 as “a classic v intage.” K im Crawford South Island Pinot Noir ($17.99) is also a good choice for the holidays, and a perfect pairing partner for roasted turkey or mushroom dishes. From Australia, Domaine Terlato & Chapoutier S h i r a z -V i o g n i e r ($17.99) packs a peppery punch and is a perfect foil for grilled and roasted meats. Although it’s an Aussie wine, it’s made in the style of Côte Rôtie via a collaborative effort between two renowned wine families: Chapoutier from France and Napa Valley’s Terlato. Happy Holidays! CW

F F O % 50 I H S U S L L A S L L O &R AY ! D Y R E V AY E ALL D

Café

Madrid

DRINK

Beer & Wine WHY WAIT?

Breakfast & Lunch 7:00am to 3:00 pm monday-saturday

Authentic Spanish Cuisine For Dinner Reservations • 801-634-7203 Catering & Special Events mycafemadrid@gmail.com 5244 S. Highland Dr. | www.cafemadrid.net

AND ASIAN GRILL M-ThÛ~~¤~ ÝFÛ~~¤~~ÝSÛ~ ¤~~ÝSu 12-9 NOW OPEN! 9000 S 109 W, SANDY & 3424 S STATE STREET ~ ~Ýa[`aZYfkmk`aml [ge

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FOOD MATTERS by TED SCHEFFLER @critic1

Chow Truck Parks

5370 s. 900 e. Murray, UT Phone: 801.266.4182 MON-THU 11a-11p FRI-SAT 11a-12a SUN 3p-10p NIN T H & NIN TH & 2 54 SOUTH M AI N

When I ran into SuAn Chow recently, I was happy about the news she had to share— and Davis County residents will be, too. Her Chow Truck (ChowTruck.com) was Salt Lake City’s first “haute cuisine” food truck, and it has become a staple of our city’s moveable feast, offering Asian-inspired tacos, sliders, salads and other tasty items. Well, shoppers at Farmington’s Station Park will soon be able to enjoy Chow’s chow as well: A brick & mortar Chow Truck location is opening in the west pavilion of the shopping center. “With more space and equipment, I’ve been able to add some fun new items to the menu,” Chow says. “For example, we’re doing a grilled airline chicken breast with citrus aioli and plum-ginger sauce.” In regard to moving indoors just as the weather is turning frigid, she adds, “It will also be a treat to have air conditioning in the summer and heat in the winter at Station Park.”

r n u o or ocatio 14! f tch ity L er 20 a W k C ecemb

Taste Freshness!

Parming D Co

310 BUGATTI DRIVE 300 W 2100 S, South Salt Lake

801.467.2890 s sun - thu 11-8pm s fri & sat 11-10pm

2014

2007 2008

WE’RE TURNING 1 !

FREE BURRITO

801-883-9255 | 209 W 200 S

Cannot be combined with any other offer or special

Quote of the week: Beauty does not season soup. —Polish proverb Food Matters 411: teds@xmission.com

NOVEMBER 27, 2014 | 27

CHILE VERDE BURRITO W/ $10 PURCHASE

| CITY WEEKLY |

CELEBRATE WITH US!

The Habit Burger Grill (HabitBurger. com) has opened its sixth Utah location, this one at 508 W. Antelope Drive in Layton. As always, Habit kicked things off by donating 100 percent of proceeds during its opening days to local nonprofits. The beneficiaries were Utah Easy to Love, Northridge High School and The Utah 1033 Foundation, which aids families of fallen police officers.

More Habit to Love

2005

VOTED BEST COFFEE HOUSE

Where food fads are concerned, the rapid rise of Peruvian fare in the United States is one I’m happy to get behind. It seems to me that ceviche is quickly replacing sushi in popularity as one of America’s trending foods. Well, if you’d like to experience the diversity of Peruvian flavors, head to The Infinity Event Center (26 E. 600 South) on Saturday, Dec. 6, for Taste of Peru. The event is an international gastronomic fair showcasing Peruvian cuisine in Utah with cooking exhibitions, food and drink samplings and tastings, contests, live music and more. Participants include Puro Peru Peruvian Grill, Del Mar al Lago, Ceviche 801, Inca Cola, Pisco Portón and others. Tickets are $3 and can be purchased at SmithsTix.com.

| cityweekly.net |

Ceviche in the City

S G I V N G BREW EER BNovember 18 - 30 I NEWS th

Bleu

BY Mike Riedel

$10

HOUSE BREWED PITCHERS

| cityweekly.net |

376 8TH AVE, STE. C, SALT LAKE CITY, UT | 385.227.8628 | AVENUESPROPER.COM

| CITY WEEKLY |

28 | NOVEMBER 27, 2014

Feel Good Getting

New Park City Brewery

The past 15 years have seen unprecedented growth in the craft-beer industry. Breweries have been popping up in all corners of North America, and Utah is no exception. Park City Brewery (not to be confused with Park City Brewing, owned by Moab Brewery) hopes to be Utah’s newest brewery by the end of 2014. Co-owner Scot t R ay says he plans to start serv ing the br e w er y ’s IPA, pale ale, brow n a le a nd kolsch beer r i ght befor e t he holidays. The brewer y w ill be producing “ h i g h-a lc ohol” a nd “Uta h streng th” beer in bottles, and hopes to have its beer on draft locally.

2 Row Brewing Company

If you thought we were done talking about new Utah breweries, think again! Brian Colman of Draper has been an avid homebrewer for years, and his beers have made a name for themselves in the homebrewing community. When Colman came across an unbelievable deal on a professional brew system, he dropped everything, f lew to the East Coast, threw it in a rental truck and brought it home. That spotaneous purchase is great news for Utah: 2 Row Brewing Company in Midvale is in the process of installing its new system and plans to brew exclusively high-alcohol beers ranging from IPAs to Belgian Biere de Gardes. Look for 2 Row’s opening by April 2015.

Uinta’s Brighton IPA an american craft kitchen

NOW SERVING DINNER 801-410-4046 3364 s 2300 e, slc slcprovisions.com

Uinta Brewing Company’s partnership with Brighton Ski Resort continues with the release of this year’s Brighton IPA, which changes approximately every quarter. The current incarnation is made with an Australian variety of hops called Ella, which impart subtle spice and floral notes up front, with hints of citrus peel in the back. This beer is available on draft and in Uinta’s 750ml “corked & caged” Champagne-style bottles. A portion of the sales from Brighton IPA go to the Utah Avalanche Center.

BRUNCH

SAT AND SUN | 9AM-1PM

Live Mus ic EVE RY WED, FRI & S AT

HENRY WADE | NOV 22 JIM GUSS TRIO | NOV 26

COCO MONTOYA

DECEMBER 9TH & 10TH TUE -FRI 4:30PM - 10PM HAPPY HOUR 4:30PM - 6PM 1/2 PRICED SMALL PLATES

1615 SOUTH FOOTHILL DR. 801�583�8331

THE OTHER PLACE

RESTAURANT Breakfast

OMELETTES | PANCAKES GREEK SPECIALTIES

Lunch & Dinner HOMEMADE SOUP

GREEK SPECIALS GREEK SALADS HOT OR COLD SANDWICHES | KABOBS PASTA | FISH STEAKS | CHOPS GREEK PLATTERS & GREEK DESSERTS

Beer & Wine

EAT MORE

LAMB

Open 7 days a week

MON - SAT 7AM - 11PM SUN 8AM - 10PM

469 EAST 300 SOUTH | 521-6567

@ FE LDMANSDE LI

COME JOIN US FOR A LIVE PERFORMANCE BY

PAUL RASMUSSEN AND MARK JARDINE DEC 6TH AT 7PM

GOODEATS Complete listings at cityweekly.net Featuring dining destinations from buffets and rooms with a view to mom & pop joints, chic cuisine and some of our dining critic’s faves!

Gift Certificates Available

Manuel’s El Burrito Restaurant & Cantina

Located on the main drag in Clearfield, Manuel’s El Burrito & Cantina has been pleasing Davis County residents on the hunt for authentic Mexican and Southwestern food for years. Try the barbacoa (sweet pork), large quesadillas, compuestas, housemade menudo, Mexican pizza, terrific chile verde and chile Colorado and (of course) burritos, enchiladas and tacos. 1145 S. State, Clearfield, 801-773-7579, ILoveManuelsElBurrito.com

Mykonos

FELDMANSDELI.COM / OPEN TUES - SAT TO GO ORDERS: (801) 906-0369

, 5 . # ( s $ ) . . % 2 s # / # + 4! ) ,3

7%34 -!2 +%4 342 % %4 801.519.9595

C U A O N EAT O Y L L VER 200 IT MS A E

| cityweekly.net |

2005 E. 2700 South, SLC

While shopping the many local downtown businesses, you can stop at Mykonos in the City Creek food court for fresh Greek favorites. Start off with hummus, fried zucchini and mushrooms, or dolmades before digging into a shawarma wrap, gyro, falafel plate and more. For a healthy afternoon snack, try the pita with hummus. 28 S. State, Salt Lake City, 801-532-4480, MykonosCityCreek.com

CHINESE SEAFOOD | SUSHI | MONGOLIAN

L U N C H B U F F E T s D I N N E R B U F F E T s S U N D AY A L L D AY B U F F E T

T E L : 8 0 1 . 9 6 9 . 6 6 6 6 | 5 6 6 8 S R E D W O O D R D TAY L O R S V I L L E , U T

NOVEMBER 27, 2014 | 29

KING BUFFET

| CITY WEEKLY |

COMING SOO N s DEC 8 TH

| cityweekly.net |

| CITY WEEKLY |

30 | NOVEMBER 27, 2014

grand

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Experience a Taste of...

Europe

Come meet the

Dutch Saint Nicholas 2696 Highland Dr. 801-467-5052

olddutchstore.com

in the store Sat Nov 29th from 1pm - 4pm and on Sat Dec 6th from 1pm - 4pm.

Dutch, German & Scandinavian Market M-F 9am-6pm Sat 9am-5pm Closed Sunday

GOODEATS Complete listings at cityweekly.net Osaka Sushi

The menu at Osaka is extensive, to say the least. Sure, there is sushi and sashimi, but at Osaka, the options are much, much more plentiful than just raw fish. For example, kids love the teriyaki and tempura plate, while everybody enjoys the yummy udon noodles and specialty items such as tonkatsu and Korean-style kalbi. Yakisoba, chirashi, ramen ... if you can’t find it at Osaka, it probably doesn’t exist. 918 Heritage Park Blvd., Layton, 801-776-0888; 996 N. Main, Tooele, 435833-9123, OsakaSushi.blogspot.com

A Chill Place for All Things Tea

Loose Leaf, Boba Tea, Handmade Italian Desserts and more...

929 E. 4500 S. 801.590.8247

Pho Bien Hoa

At Pho Bien Hoa in Taylorsville, you can choose from 16 different selections of pho—Vietnamese noodle soup—in small or large portions. Among the pho meat options are thinly sliced rare beef, flank steak, fatty flank, brisket, fatty brisket, beef meatballs, tendon and tripe. Along with your pho, you’ll get condiments such as hot sauce, Thai basil, lime wedges, jalapeño slices, bean sprouts and cilantro. Sit down in the clean, modern dining room or take your comfort food to go. 4146 S. 1785 West, Taylorsville, 801-969-2515, PhoBienHoa.com

Royal South Sea Restaurant

This unique little eatery features Chinese, Thai and American cuisine and friendly service from the husband & wife duo who run the restaurant and do all the cooking. Although seating is limited (only about five tables), most of the orders are takeout or delivery, so you shouldn’t have trouble finding a table. All the menu items are affordable and made fresh when you order, from the delicious Chinese choices like pon pon chicken, shrimp chow mein and yung chow fried rice, to the Thai dishes like pad thai and various curries, to the closerto-home grilled cheese and chicken-fried steak. 7444 S. State, Midvale, 801-352-8888, RoyalSouthSea.wix.com/food

Primo Restaurant

Primo Restaurant is a classic, old-school eatery with old-fashioned professional service and the traditional fare to go with it. Pasta is offered with a choice of sauces, including vodka Alfredo and puttanesca. There are four sensational veal dishes on the menu, along with filet mignon Bordelaise, rack of lamb, shrimp scampi, chicken piccata and much more, including a well-selected wine list. 4699 S. Highland Drive, Holladay, 801947-0025, PrimoSLC.com

restaurant & catering co.

9 Exchange Place, Boston Building Downtown SLC • (801) 355. 2146

complimentary side & drink

with purchase of a full sandwich

Das ist gut n

se s e t a Delic rant n a Germ Restau &

BUY 1 GET 1

HAlF OFF with this ad donut panini with handcrafted ice cream 15 s highway 89 North Salt lake | 801-706-3013

www.scoopology.com open 1-9pm

Catering Catering Available available

Open Mon-Wed: 9am-6pm Thu-Sat: 9am-9pm

20 W. 200 S. s (801) 355-3891

GOODEATS Complete listings at cityweekly.net The Blue Boar Inn & Restaurant

At the Blue Boar Inn & Restaurant in Midway, you’ll stroll into an old-fashioned European chateau, right down to the tall turrets and wrought-iron balconies. Chef Eric May favors fresh, seasonal, local and organic ingredients whenever possible for his European-influenced fare. Kick off a meal with fondue-for-two made with Gruyere and Emmental cheeses, followed perhaps by a lobster salad. Rustic entrees include filet mignon, steamed halibut and seared half chicken. It’s wise, when possible, to book an overnight stay so you can enjoy the complimentary breakfast, which features cinnamon-swirl brioche French toast, the spinach and roasted-pepper Mediterranean omelet, grilled Norwegian salmon, and sirloin steak with eggs. 1235 Warm Springs Road, Midway, 435654-1400, TheBlueBoarInn.com

Per Noi Trattoria

Nuestra Cocina

Located inside Rancho Market, Nuestra Cocina is an open kitchen with counter seating and picnic tables, where a team of friendly Mexican women make everything from the tortilla chips to menudo, chilaquiles and more. The main draw is the outrageously good molcajete. First, a layer of Oaxacan cheese is placed into the bottom of a stone molcajete. It melts immediately, creating a beautiful brown cheesy crust. Next, strips of napolitos, cooked shrimp, chicken and thin strips of beef are placed into the hot molcajete, along with whole charred jalapeños and plump Mexican-style green onions. Finally, the entire thing is topped with thick chunks of feta-like cheese and delivered to your table, hot enough to cause concern. Olé! 2470 S. Redwood Road, West Valley City, 801-577-0030

the SMOKED BACON CHEESEBURGER

1 2 N E I G H B O R H O O D L O CAT I O N S |

A PERUVIAN TASTE FOR THE WORLD! S

Live Music

Fri & Sat Nights

8475 S. State Street 801-566-0901 Mon-Thu 11am-9pm | Fri & Sat 11am-midnight | Sun 11am-7pm

NOW OPEN Serving Brunch & Dinner

2302 PARLEY’S WAY SLC, UT | (801) 466-9827

HARBORSLC.COM

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FA C E B O O K . C O M / A P O L L O B U R G E R

| cityweekly.net |

Owned by Naples native Francesco Montino, Per Noi Trattoria (“per noi” means “for us” in Italian) is a cozy, welcoming Italian restaurant in Sugar House. All the dishes on the small menu are family recipes, so you won’t go wrong whatever you choose. Begin with eggplant parmigiana, arancini or a Caprese or Caesar salad. Pasta options are examples of authentic, down-home Italian cooking, with

choices such as rigatoni Siciliano, risotto del Giorno, ravioli di spinaci, and more. There are also entree options such as rib-eye al pastore, pollo marsala and Margherita pizza. For dessert, try the delicious tiramisu, with decadent mascarpone cheese. In sunny weather, enjoy your meal on the spacious patio. 1588 E. Stratford Ave., Salt Lake City, 801-486-3333, PerNoiTrattoria.com

| CITY WEEKLY |

Buy Local, Save Big at CITYWEEKLYSTORE.COM

NOVEMBER 27, 2014 | 31

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| cityweekly.net |

| CITY WEEKLY |

32 | NOVEMBER 27, 2014

AS SEEN ON â&#x20AC;&#x153; DINERS, DRIVE-INS AND DIVESâ&#x20AC;?

1@MQDIBÂą H@MD><IÂą !JHAJMOÂą$JJ?Âą 1DI>@Âą

A sampler of Ted Schefflerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s reviews Harbor Seafood & Steak Co.

Ă?Ă&#x203A;:I<<BJ@;<Ă&#x203A;G8K@FJ Ă?Ă&#x203A;9<JKĂ&#x203A;9I<8B=8JKĂ&#x203A; Â&#x2021;Â&#x2021;Â&#x2026;Ă&#x203A;ÂŹĂ&#x203A; Â&#x2021;~Â&#x2021; Ă?Ă&#x203A;Â&#x2026;Â Ă&#x203A;P<8IJĂ&#x203A;8E;Ă&#x203A;>F@E>Ă&#x203A;JKIFE> Ă?Ă&#x203A;;<C@:@FLJĂ&#x203A;D@DFJ8JĂ&#x203A;ÂŹĂ&#x203A;9CFF;PĂ&#x203A;D8IPÂżJ â&#x20AC;&#x153;In a perfect world, every town would have a diner just like Ruthâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;sâ&#x20AC;? -CityWeekly

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Like having dinner at Momâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s in the mountainsâ&#x20AC;? -Cincinnati Enquirer

CF:8K<;Ă&#x203A;ALJKĂ&#x203A; Ă&#x203A;D@C<JĂ&#x203A;<8JKĂ&#x203A;F=Ă&#x203A;?F>C<Ă&#x203A;QFFĂ&#x203A;Ă?Ă&#x203A;Â ~Â&#x192;Â&#x2021;Ă&#x203A;<D@>I8K@FEĂ&#x203A;:8EPFEĂ&#x203A;IF8;Ă&#x203A;JC:Â&#x2022;Ă&#x203A;LKĂ&#x203A;Â&#x2026;Â ~Â&#x2021;Â&#x2026;

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Breakfast until 4pm, Lunch and Dinner 7 days a week

OPEN MON-THUR 11AM-9PM FRI-SAT 11AM-10PM SUN 12PM-9PM

_STREET TACOS_ _BEER MARGARITAS_ _SHRIMP & STEAK FAJITAS_

3956 W. Innovation Drive (13400 S) 801-565-8818 â&#x20AC;˘ salsaleedos.net

At Harbor, every effort is made to use local, in-season ingredients, and to fly in the freshest seafood. So, at a recent dinner, we started the evening with stuffed, battered and fried squash blossoms that came from the restaurantâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s garden. An equally outstanding appetizerâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;although the portion size might cause you to think itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s an entreeâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;is tuna carpaccio, which featured a big slab of sushi-grade tuna, sliced to about 1/8-inch thickness so that it covered the entire dinner plate it was served upon. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s drizzled with a light citrus vinaigrette, and topped with an edible garnish of avocado, citrus salad and candied wasabi. The grilled hanger steak we also ordered was perfectly cooked and sliced into medallions, with a zippy peppercorn sauce. On the side was a generous serving of housemade macaroni & cheese and scrumptious peas with big chunks of crisp smoked bacon. The service at Harbor is also excellent. It wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t until weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d gotten through part of our meal that we discovered our server was none other than co-owner Taylor Jacobsen. Both owners pitch in and work the floor, and in doing so, he can afford to pay the others servers better. Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s just another reason to dock yourself at Harbor. Reviewed Nov. 13. 2302 Parleyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Way, Salt Lake City, 801466-9527, HarborSLC.com

Toshâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Ramen

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Toshâ&#x20AC;? is chef/owner Toshio Sekikawa, whose name you know if youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re a fan of Asian cuisine in Utah. Tosh is a wonderfully outgoing and generous guy, and Toshâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Ramen suits his personality. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a simple ramen shopâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;minimalist in dĂŠcor and accoutrementsâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; because the laser-like focus here is on one thing and one thing only: ramen. Like pho, ramen is really all about the broth. And, of course, Tosh makes his from scratch, simmering bones overnight. There are five types of ramen to choose from at Toshâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, and my favorite is the one that best showcases that glistening, delicious broth: tonkotsu ramen. The broth is nearly clear, served in a huge ramen bowl with a generous helping of excellent wheat & egg noodles from Los Angelesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Sun Noodle company. The ramen is adorned with crunchy bean sprouts, thin-sliced pork belly, half a hard-cooked egg, and minced scallions. Toshâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s is usually filled with people who arenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t ramen rookies, and youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll want to take their lead and get your face down into that big bowl: Slurping is considered de rigueur. Reviewed Nov. 6. 1465 S. State, Salt Lake City, 801-466-7000, ToshsRamen.com

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REVIEW BITES

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REVIEW BITES

A sampler of Ted Schefflerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s reviews

Sole Mio Ristorante

If youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re in the mood for hearty Sicilian fare, in a place where Grandma is in the kitchen and the grandkids are waiting on tables, Sole Mio is for you. You wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t go home hungry or ruin your budget here; the most expensive menu item tops out at $17.95â&#x20AC;&#x201D;and thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s for bistecca alla campagnola, a grilled New York steak on an arugula bed, topped with shaved Parmesan and balsamic vinegar, with veggies on the side. The pastas are so generously portioned that I recommend sharing them. We especially enjoyed the ravioli spinaci: a plate of 10 or so large housemade ravioli stuffed with a puree of ricotta, spinach and Parmesan, served in a silky, rich tomato-cream sauce. I could barely put a dent in my piled-high plate of spaghetti alla carbonara, made with pancetta, eggs, Parmesan and cream. But when your server asks if youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve saved room for dessert, answer with a resounding â&#x20AC;&#x153;Yes!â&#x20AC;? and order the incomparable housemade tiramisu. Reviewed Oct. 16. 8657 S. Highland Drive, Sandy, 801-942-2623

Maxwellâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s East Coast Eatery

When most of us think of NYC-style pizza, weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re thinking of the by-the-slice plain cheese pizza served on paper plates and often eaten on the run. For that, I turn to Este. The crust is just right: not too thick and not too thin, and the folks at Este never overdo the cheese-to-sauce ratio. Reviewed Oct. 9. 2148 S. 900 East, Salt Lake City, 801-485-3699; 156 E. 200 South, Salt Lake City, 801-363-2366, EstePizzaCo.com

98% Vegan 98% Gluten-Free 863 E 9400 S 801.566.1134

Handle

Chef/owner Briar Handly, who most recently served as executive chef at the award-winning Talisker on Main in Park City, has taken a space in Park Cityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Gateway office complex and transformed it into a warm, inviting restaurant serving comforting cuisine thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s upscale but not precious. Handly has mad chef skills, so even a simple appetizer of Hawaiian albacore crudo is more than just the standard raw fish: his is presented cubed, along with cubes and slices of ruby-red grapefruit, fresh greens with a grapefruit vinaigrette andâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;hereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the kickerâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;finely grated fresh horseradish on top. Even bread service is uncommon. A bowl of fresh-baked bread comes with a trio of condiments: top-quality California olive oil, salted butter and seasonal mustard or marmalade. And the staff is so accommodating and friendly that theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d have no problem with someone coming in and just ordering the bread, or perhaps a meat & cheese plate, while enjoying one of the craft cocktails, a cold beer or a glass of wine from Handleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s brief but well-conceived wine list. Reviewed Oct. 2. 136 Heber Ave., Park City, 435-602-1155, HandleParkCity.com

indian cuisine

IT â&#x20AC;&#x2122;S A B U R R IT O SI ZE D H A N D R O LL ED SU SH I!

801.995.0909 | 801.995.1601

464)*#633*5065") $0.

/ORTH .AIN 4T Č&#x201E; -AYTON Č&#x201E;

FRESH â&#x20AC;˘ TASTY â&#x20AC;˘ HEALTHY

NOVEMBER 27, 2014 | 33

&"45 4065) s 4-$

DINE-IN or TAKE-OUT

| CITY WEEKLY |

S U S H I B U R R IT O ?

Thick, deep-dish pies were made famous at Chicagoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pizzeria Uno, The Original Ginoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pizza, Connieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, Giordanoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s and others. However, equally in demand in the Windy Cityâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;maybe even more soâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;is Chicagostyle thin-crust pizza of the type youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll find at Sweet Home Chicago Pizzeria, also called a â&#x20AC;&#x153;flatâ&#x20AC;? pizza in the Windy City. The former owner of a successful pizzeria in Chicagoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;burbs called Pepeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, Jim Pecora relocated to the Salt Lake Valley with the intent of bringing â&#x20AC;&#x153;realâ&#x20AC;? Chicago pizza to Utah. Mission accomplished. Reviewed Oct. 9. 1442 E. Draper Parkway, Draper, 801-545-0455, SHCPizza.com

Este Pizzeria

Sweet Home Chicago Pizzeria

For Ăźber cheesy, chewy, American classic pizza of the type most of us either grew up on or learned to love in college, Utahns tend to turn to The Pie. Since 1980, university students, families and anyone else with a hankering for a large, overloaded pizza pie have been going to The Pieâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;a perennial City Weekly Best of Utah winner in the pizza categoryâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;for their pizza fixes. You canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t argue with The Pieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s recipe for success, and for their rib-sticking pizza. Reviewed Oct. 9. Multiple locations, ThePie.com

| cityweekly.net |

Of all the pizzas in Utah, my very favorite is probably one of the hardest to categorize. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s at Maxwellâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, home of the Fat Kid pizza, which you can get by the slice, or as a 20-inch pie. The best of the bunch is the one topped with meatball slices. This pizza is the type you find in southern New Jersey and the Philadelphia area: hearty thin-crust pies with high-quality cheese and a light touch of sauce. Steven Maxwell, owner of Maxwellâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, is of Italian descent and hails originally from New Jersey. Somewhere between Penns Grove, N.J., and South Philly, he learned how to make a bodacious pizza pie, and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s one that I depend on until my next visit to South Jersey. Reviewed Oct. 9. 357 S. Main, Salt Lake City, 801-328-0304; 1456 Newpark Blvd., Park City, 435-647-0304, MaxwellsECE.com

The Pie Pizzeria

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34 | NOVEMBER 27, 2014

Horrible Bosses 2

Safely Outrageous

CINEMA

Horrible Bosses 2 depends on the most predictable kind of transgressive humor.

A Brief History of Tame By Scott Renshaw scottr@cityweekly.net @scottrenshaw

By Scott Renshaw scottr@cityweekly.net @scottrenshaw

n the opening scene from Horrible Bosses 2, our returning protagonist trio—Nick (Jason Bateman), Kurt (Jason Sudeikis) and Dale (Charlie Day)—appear on a happy-talk morning news show to promote their entrepreneurial idea, a showerhead that includes a shampoo dispenser. Kurt stands in a makeshift shower in the studio to demonstrate the device, but darn it, the water won’t work. So Dale goes behind the pebbled-glass shower to manually pump the water—in such a way that it appears he is performing a pleasurable act on his friend. If that sounds like a hilarious gag—one that you don’t think was exhausted already after three different Austin Powers movies employed slight variations on that same theme—then boy, are you the audience for Horrible Bosses 2. Because here’s a comedy built on a theoretical notion of outrageousness that actually paints within the narrowest possible notions of outrageous. Did they just go there? Well, of course they did. Unlike the murder-based plot of the original film, this one involves crime with a slightly less permanent intended consequence. Seeking to raise funds for their business, our heroes turn to venture capitalist Bert Hanson (Christoph Waltz) and his son, Rex (Chris Pine), to get them started. But when Bert deliberately screws them on their deal—forcing them into a foreclosure where he can swoop in and cash in—the friends turn to an option that conveniently combines revenge with fiscal practicality: kidnapping Rex and using the ransom money to save their business. Because it’s part of the sequel package, Horrible Bosses alums Kevin Spacey (as Bateman’s now-jailed ex-boss), Jennifer Aniston (as Day’s sex-addict man-eating exboss) and Jamie Foxx (as shady underworld contact M*****f****** Jones) also return,

for reasons with varying degrees of plausibility. But it’s really all about the chemistry between Bateman, Sudeikis and Day—and while everyone’s mileage may vary, especially where Day is concerned, there’s a terrific dynamic at work between them. Their overlapping nervous chatter has an almost musical quality, a three-part harmony of idiocy that’s greater than the sum of the actors’ individual parts. Throw in Pine’s terrific work as a kind of paradigm of the entitled scion douchebag—the guy has comedic chops that he’ll probably never get to exploit to the fullest because of his leading-man looks—and there’s enough energy here to provide plenty of laughs. What Horrible Bosses 2 doesn’t bother bringing to the table is all that much creatively funny stuff for them to do. Co-writer/ director Sean Anders (Sex Drive, We’re the Millers)—taking over from director Seth Gordon and a writing team including John Francis Daley and Jonathan M. Goldstein— goes all-in on the gay-panic humor after the aforementioned shower sequence, with gags predicated on prison rape and being horrified at being misunderstood to be gay and so on and so forth. The climax involves an extended car chase with a couple of genuinely solid joke concepts, but the humor is based largely on the stars’ frantic responses to situations that aren’t particularly interesting. It’s a movie dependent on mistakenly equating the hilarity of a scene with how loudly everyone in that scene acts.

Charlie Day, Jason Sudeikis and Jason Bateman in Horrible Bosses 2 But the bigger problem is that Horrible Bosses 2 is of that subgenre of comedies that pose as “transgressive,” yet are in many ways deeply conservative. It may be naughty-sounding when the movie drops a punch line about sexual gratification through excretory functions, or a guy is berated for having “no balls,” or when you get a handful of those gay-panic jokes, but it’s not risk-taking. They’re jokes you would have laughed at in middle school, thrown into an R-rated package. That doesn’t mean you’re not going to laugh at some of those jokes—or maybe even more than some of them—especially if the cast clicks and bounces off one another like the main trio (plus Pine) do here. There’s just a difference between a funny movie and funny people in a movie—and that difference is a script that makes more than a token effort. Horrible Bosses 2 counts on you chuckling at the suggestion that one guy is jerking another guy, when it’s spending just as much time simply jerking around. CW

HORRIBLE BOSSES 2

HH.5 Jason Bateman Jason Sudeikis Charlie Day Rated R

TRY THESE Sex Drive (2008) Josh Zuckerman Amanda Crew Rated R

SIDESHOW

Horrible Bosses (2011) Jason Bateman Jason Sudeikis Rated R

That’s My Boy (2012) Adam Sandler Andy Samberg Rated R

We’re the Millers (2013) Jennifer Aniston Jason Sudeikis Rated R

suppose one could be annoyed at James Marsh’s The Theory of Everything because it pushes aside Stephen Hawking’s titanic achievements in understanding the universe in favor of a conventional romantic biopic material. It seems like a more valid reason for annoyance that it’s not even particularly good as a conventional romantic biopic. The story opens in Cambridge in 1963, where physics grad student Hawking (Eddie Redmayne) is doing typical physics grad student things, like trying to figure out his thesis subject and being painfully awkward around girls like Jane Wilde (Felicity Jones). But his life takes the unexpected turn of a diagnosis with ALS, which threatens to cut short his life, his intellectual career and his budding relationship with Jane. Of course, we know enough to realize that all three of those things lasted longer than his initial two-year survival prognosis, and the film does a solid enough job of conveying Hawking’s personal and professional challenges as he adjusts to his ever-diminishing physical capabilities. Redmayne delivers a terrific physical performance, eventually forced to rely on little more than his eyebrows to convey Hawking’s emotional state. But emotion isn’t a great strength of The Theory of Everything, as it generally finds the blandest possible way of exploring why Stephen and Jane had a connection in the first place, what factors put a strain on that connection (including their respective straying to other romantic connections), and why they ultimately drift apart. Marsh and his screenwriters seem so determined to make this story dignified and respectable that they sap it of nearly everything human. In its monotonously predictable chronological rhythms and absence of any animating spark, The Theory of Everything feels like a movie run through Hawking’s familiar voice processor: You might understand what it’s trying to say, but it’s purely synthetic. CW

THE THEORY OF EVERYTHING

HH Eddie Redmayne Felicity Jones Rated PG-13

CINEMA CLIPS

Movie times and locations at cityweekly.net

NEW THIS WEEK Information is correct at press time. Film release schedules are subject to change. Horrible Bosses 2 HH.5 See review p. 34. Opens Nov. 26 at theaters valleywide. (R)

Penguins of Madagascar HHH Spin-offs are risky, never more so than when the figures being spun off are wacky supporting characters who must now carry the story themselves. But after being the funniest part of three Madagascar films, the quartet of conniving penguins who act like they’re in a spy movie have successfully launched this zippy action comedy with clever jokes for kids as well as grown-ups. A funny prologue shows the four flightless schemers as chicks on “the Earth’s frozen bottom” (as a Herzog-ian documentary narrator calls Antarctica), and then we leapfrog past the Madagascar events to the present. Commander Skipper (Tom McGrath), right-hand man Kowalski (Chris Miller), demolitions expert Rico (Conrad Vernon) and young Private (Christopher Knights) must save their species from an insane octopus named Dave (John Malkovich), who wears a convincing human disguise and hates penguins. Directed by franchise veteran Eric Darnell and DreamWorks stalwart Simon J. Smith, and written by a trio of men whose comedy experience is mostly in live-action, the caper comes off as an offbeat, slightly manic adventure, exuding energy but not chaos. Turns out these birds can fly on their own after all. Opens Nov. 26 at theaters valleywide. (PG)—Eric D. Snider

SPECIAL SCREENINGS

Fire in the Blood At Brewvies, Dec. 1, 7 p.m. (NR)

Soul of a Banquet At Main Library, Dec. 2, 7 p.m. (NR) The Trip to Italy At Park City Film Series, Nov. 28-29 @ 8 p.m. & Nov. 30 @ 6 p.m. (R)

CURRENT RELEASES

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NOVEMBER 27, 2014 | 35

The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 1 HHH.5 Chopping the final Hunger Games novel into two films might be the best thing that could have happened to this franchise. Katniss Everdeen (Jennifer Lawrence) is now among the leaders of a

Big Hero 6 HHH.5 With all of the marketing focus on huggable, inflatable robot Baymax, you may not get the sense that this is really a story about the ripple effects of vengeance. In some ways, it’s also a pretty standard superhero origin story, focused on 14-yearold engineering genius Hiro Hamada (Ryan Potter), who puts together a team to stop a masked villain. Baymax (Scott Adsit) provides a uniquely deadpan spin on the typical Disney comic-relief character, and the “boy and his dog” relationship between Baymax and Hiro—part E.T. and part Johnny Sokko and his Giant Robot—provides a great emotional nexus. Just be aware, parents, that Big Hero 6 gets pretty intense as it digs into wounded people causing suffering while trying to ease their own pain. It’s that classic, old-school Disney bait & switch: sell the cute, deliver the dark. (PG)—SR

Night of the Hunter At Tower Theatre, Dec. 1, 7 p.m. (NR)

| cityweekly.net |

The Theory of Everything HH See review p. 34. Opens Nov. 26 at theaters valleywide. (PG-13)

CINEMA

CLIPS

Movie times and locations at cityweekly.net

36 | NOVEMBER 27, 2014

| CITY WEEKLY |

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rebellion who hope toÂ use her as a symbol to ignite all-out civil war. The series has always been about the power of propaganda, and the movies have effectively showed how Katniss is used by others to further their agendas. Lawrence delivers a terrific performance as a young woman who cannot be managed, yet whose powerful rage isÂ turned into a product. Cutting Mockingjay in half means weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re left with a sort of Empire Strikes Back cliffhanger that doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t leave room for much hopeâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;except for the reasonable hope that Part 2 will deliver a satisfying wrap-up to one of the smartest, most enthralling science-fiction films series ever. (PG-13)â&#x20AC;&#x201D;MaryAnn Johanson

Interstellar HHH Christopher Nolan wants you to feel awe about the universe and the nature of humanityâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and by God, you will feel it, if he has to shake you for three solid hours. In the near future, an increasingly uninhabitable Earth requires a secret NASA programâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;piloted by single-dad Cooper (Matthew McConaughey)â&#x20AC;&#x201D;to seek a new home planet somewhere through a mysterious wormhole. Nolan does some tremendously effective world-building, in the service of profoundly humanist science-fiction that sings with the amazing things of which we are capable. But Nolan sings so long and so loud that his Big Ideas about the mysteries of time and space, about mortality, about love, etc. become a multi-hour crescendo thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s as exhausting as it is thrilling. His ambition tells us things we need to hear, but itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s okay sometimes not to yell it. (PG-13)â&#x20AC;&#x201D;SR

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DVD

Broad City: Season 1 The hilarious New York City misadventures of broke 20-somethings Ilana Glazer and Abbi Jacobson, with assists from Amy Poehler, Hannibal Buress, Janeane Garofalo and more. Come for the female empowerment, stay for the pussy jokes. (Paramount)

Dawn of the Planet of the Apes

Six on-demand alternatives to (TV’s lack of) Thanksgiving programming.

A decade after mankind’s collapse (as you may recall from Rise of the Planet of the Apes), apes and humans are at war to determine who will rule the planet. To be continued in Breakfast of the Planet of the Apes. (Fox)

Cinema Insomnia (Roku’s Zom-Bee TV)

The 10-episode Transparent has been— rightfully so—talked up as a vehicle for TV vet Jeffrey Tambor’s out-of-the-park performance as retired professor Mort, who’s finally let it be known to his family that he’s transgender and has always identified as Maura (good call not going with Morticia). But Transparent’s killer ensemble (which includes Judith Light, Rob Huebel, Gaby Hoffmann, Jay Duplass, Carrie Brownstein and many more familiar faces) is the show, like a less-whiney Parenthood shot through an LGBT prism. Gather the family ’round after Thanksgiving dinner … well, maybe not all of them.

Hand of God (Amazon Prime) Only a single pilot episode (which was up-voted to a full series for 2015 by Amazon Prime viewers—welcome to the future) is available at the moment, but it’s a promising hour: Ron Perlman (late of Sons of Anarchy) stars as a hard-living, morally gray judge who suffers a mental breakdown and suddenly believes God (who talks to him through his comatose son) wants him to become a vigilante for a higher law. Along for the ride are Dana Delany (as his skeptical wife) and Garret Dillahunt (as a sketchy, Jesus-y criminal the judge enlists to help dispense his “righteous” justice). And yet he’s still more sympathetic than Sons of Anarchy’s Clay Morrow.

The Wrong Mans (Hulu) Grammatically off but otherwise very British, the six-episode The Wrong Mans follows a pair of everyday, none-too-bright city workers (Mathew Baynton and James Corden, both of Brit comedy Gavin & Stacey, the latter being next year’s Late Late Show replacement for Craig Ferguson) who inadvertently become embroiled in an intricate, dangerous conspiracy that escalates by the minute—it’s 24 and Homeland meets The Office and Parks & Recreation, with the dramatic and comedic sides played up equally. Not to sound like That Guy, but Americans can rarely pull this mix off (though The Wrong Mans was partially inspired by the Coen Brothers’ Burn After Reading).

Bojack Horseman (Netflix) Bojack Horseman (Netflix) Lame sitcom The Millers was a complete waste of Will Arnett—thankfully, CBS has canceled it so he can concentrate on a second season of Bojack Horseman. The first dropped in August, 12 animated episodes about irrelevant TV star Bojack Horseman (a man-horse voiced by Arnett) who was never able to follow-up his craptastic (but still better than The Millers) hit ’90s comedy, Horsin’ Around. Now, he spends his days and nights boozing, whoring, lapping up what little recognition he still receives and attempting to write a comeback biography, with little help from his freeloading mansion roommate Todd (Breaking Bad’s Aaron Paul). Like Californication remade for Adult Swim, Bojack Horseman is a sick-and-wrong slap at Holly wood, but with the random sweet, poignant aside … which inevitably turns sicker and wrong-er.

Longmire (Netflix) The first two seasons that originally aired on A&E (Assclowns & Evildoers) are available now; Season 3 will follow eventually; Netf lix has rescued Longmire from A&E’s recent cancellation by agreeing to produce a fourth. So catch up, already. CW

After the worst day of his life, a depressed dude (Ryan Hansen) fakes his own death on Facebook to see if anybody will “like” it; a fake funeral and ham-handed commentary on social media ensue. (Gravitas Ventures)

Gutshot Straight A gambler who likes to live on the edge (CSI’s George Eads) makes his most dangerous bet ever, involving sex, mobsters, murder and a five-minute appearance by a morbidly obese crime boss (Steven Seagal). (Lionsgate)

Jingle All the Way 2 Divorced dad Larry (conveniently, Larry the Cable Guy) wants to get his 8-year-old daughter the hottest gift of the season— but her new stepdad is out to foil his plans! Will Larry … make it happen? Catchphrase psych! (Fox)

More New DVD/VOD Releases (Dec. 2) The Congress, The Dark Place, The Hundred-Foot Journey, The Idiot, Justified: Season 5, Kite, Rhymes With Banana, The Simpsons: Season 17, Sliders: The Complete Series, Speak No Evil, The Strain: Season 1, Three’s Company: The Complete Series Listen to Bill on Mondays at 8 a.m. on X96 Radio From Hell; weekly on the TV Tan podcast via iTunes and Stitcher.

Transparent (Amazon Prime)

Friended to Death

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“Your host” Mr. Lobo has presented late-night horror-cheese showcase Cinema Insomnia for 13 years through a smattering of regional cable outlets and, probably, subliminal mind control. Last year, Zom-Bee TV (available through streaming service Roku) picked up Cinema Insomnia, exposing the campy creature-feature to a slightly wider audience that needs to know: “They’re not bad movies … just misunderstood.” The suave-ish Mr. Lobo tees up classics like The Horror of Party Beach and The Brain That Wouldn’t Die with the snarky intros and interstitials you’d expect, but what sets Cinema Insomnia apart is its mind-bending, cocktail-kitsch menagerie of vintage commercials and film trailers, as well as the occasional recipe (Santo vs. the Vampire Women’s detailed snack instructional for chips & salsa: a bag of chips, a bowl and a bottle of salsa). Episodes are also available at CinemaInsomnia.com

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38 | NOVEMBER 27, 2014

Body Language

MUSIC julien bourgeois

my brightest diamond

My Brightest Diamond reclaims her body on dance-inspired new album. By Kolbie Stonehocker kstonehocker@cityweekly.net @vonstonehocker

he music video for “Pressure,” a sparkling new single by Shara Worden, aka My Brightest Diamond, is filled with bodies in motion. Flailing, whirling, spinning, kicking, colliding and bending, they wildly and ecstatically dance, moving together to the rhythm as one united group of hands, feet and limbs. This emphasis on the body at its most physical is indeed a significant theme of Worden’s latest album, This Is My Hand, released in September. But on a deeper level, the music is largely inspired by the revolutionary act of claiming one’s own body. “I grew up in a Christian culture that didn’t allow room for the body at all,” says Worden, who was born in Arkansas. Though her parents listened to a variety of music, “they didn’t let me dance,” she says. And in college, when she realized it might be difficult to be recognized as a legitimate musician if she was also a dancer, she chose to “shut down that part of me,” she says. On This Is My Hand, the Detroit singer-songwriter and composer’s fourth original release as My Brightest Diamond, she sought to put an end to those years of self-denial. “I really wanted to … begin that kind of self-acceptance, take ownership of my body for myself—not for what I grew up with or I thought people would think of me or any of that,” Worden says. Worden’s original vision for This Is My Hand was for a “full experience of like a tribe coming together and dancing and singing and clapping, and telling stories together,” she says, but “when I went to write dance music, I realized that I don’t know how to write dance music.” Worden’s sound—as heard on earlier albums such as 2011’s All Things Will Unwind and 2008’s A Thousand Sharks’ Teeth—has up till now been soft-edged, often-ethereal orchestralpop, delicately woven with strings, horns and Worden’s unearthly, smoky voice. This Is My Hand, however, is Worden’s first album where “a lot of the music did start with the beats first,” she says. The symphonic quality remains, but underneath the inventive combinations of marching-band-like drums, flutters of woodwinds and jazzy horns is a sleek, dance-worthy beat. The unique sound is a result of the meeting of two opposing ideas in Worden’s musical philosophy. On one hand is the “idea of music being for everybody,” embodied in the accessibility of punk, she says. “But then there’s another side of me that loves astronauts. And the astronauts go to the edge of the universe as far as they can see, and they specialize, they push the limit of what they can know,” just as composers continually push boundaries when they create classical music.

This is My Brightest Diamond, sole property of Shara Worden. Worden says she’s “always pulled” in both directions, and that tension is crystallized in This Is My Hand, which intrigues the mind as it propels the feet to move. There’s similar range in the lyrics; some are esoteric, full of cryptic symbols, but others are universally applicable, such as her descriptions of what it means to be a human with a human body. The album’s titular track is a string of simple affirmations with which Worden seems to be reclaiming her body and self, piece by piece. “This is my hand,” she sings. “This is my wrist, this is my arm, this is my fist. ... This is my choice, this is my thigh, this is my sex, this is my hip, this is my breast.” This Is My Hand is a pivotal point in Worden’s career “on many levels,” she says. The progression through her previous albums has “been a journey of these experiments over these four records of trying different instrument combinations and different acoustic solutions and struggling with it,” she says, “and now it feels like in a new place.” And whatever Worden comes up with next will be an even newer place. She has plans to simplify her sound, shedding the intricate embellishment to focus more on the musician/ listener connection. And, perhaps most significantly, she hopes to move toward subject matter that’s “less conceptual in a way and more just like, ‘Here’s me, here’s a human being, and this is what a human being can do with their body and with their voice.’ ” CW

My Brightest Diamond

w/Flash & Flare The Urban Lounge 241 S. 500 East Wednesday, Dec. 3, 9 p.m. $15 MyBrightestDiamond.com, TheUrbanLoungeSLC.com Limited no-fee tickets available at CityWeeklyStore.com

TRY THESE Feist Metals 2011

Sharon Van Etten Are We There 2014

St. Vincent St. Vincent 2014

BY KOLBIE STONEHOCKER @vonstonehocker

Albatross Recordings & Ephemera Moves to 900 South When Albatross Recordings & Ephemera and Diabolical Records opened in a shared space on Edison Street almost a year ago, they made a fitting match, with a passion for vinyl and other physical forms of music. But it didn’t take long for them to start outgrowing their single-room location. So, once Albatross owner Timo Hatziathanasiou’s sublease expired, he began searching for a new space and, in mid-October, re-opened his record store at 870 E. 900 South in the funky 9th & 9th neighborhood. While the new location feels comfortable and “livedin and inviting,” Hatziathanasiou says, its roomier floor plan allows for a larger selection of vinyl, books, movies and other media, as well as more “ephemera”: unusual and unique art and objects created by local and international artists.

Salt Lake Recording Service Is Closing Local recording studio Salt Lake Recording Service (801-448-7577, SaltLakeRecordingService.com) is closing its doors after eight years. As the birthplace of a number of albums from a variety of local and national artists, the studio has more than lived up to its motto of “Will record anything, anytime, anywhere.” Now, according to owner Brad McCarley, SLC reggae/ska band Wasnatch and Eric Eschelbach of Rock Solid Studios will be taking over the space and giving it a new name and focus. In the meantime, Salt Lake Recording Service has been wrapping up a handful of new local albums that you should make sure to check out. Tupelo Moan’s final album was released Nov. 22, the new record from The Chickens will be out Dec. 13, and new albums from Triggers & Slips, Folk Hogan, Wasnatch and Cosmic Boss will be released over the next six months.

The Shred Shed Is Moving  Jesse Cassar, owner of The Shred Shed, is currently hunting for a new location for his all-ages venue. But until the move is official, The Shred Shed’s remaining shows are being moved to Kilby Court (741 S. Kilby Court [330 West]), MusicGarage.org (250 W. 1300 South) and other SLC venues. Visit Facebook.com/ ShredShedSLC/events and follow The Shred Shed on Twitter (@ShredShedSLC) for the most up-to-date concert information.

Funk ’N Dive Bar Opens in Ogden Located in the basement space previously occupied by Ogden jazz joint The Wine Cellar (which closed in October), new watering hole Funk ’N Dive Bar (2550 S. Washington Blvd., 801-621-3483) opened Nov. 22, and is co-owned by Bridget Gordon of The Green Pig Pub and Dave Morris of Piper Down. The “retro American-style dive bar” will feature plenty of entertainment—live music, DJs, trivia, karaoke and more—seven days a week, as well as a drink menu of $2 cocktails, made-to-order craft cocktails and cheap beer. Visit Facebook.com/FunkNDive for more information.

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MUSIC Wild Country Sturgill Simpson isn’t trying to save country music, but he might anyway. By Patrick Wall comments@cityweekly.net

Live band karaoke Contest Starts Dec 4th with THIS IS YOUR BAND

Cash & Prizes awarded to the top 3 Male and Female performers 1st Place winners get to perform with PARTY OF FIVE at Club 90 in Feb! All proceeds will be donated to charity. Go to Facebook.com/KaroakeSLUT/ for info and to register. Only 40 slots available!

new years party with ONE WAY

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Live Music Nov 28th & 28th NIGHTFALL

Monday Football on the Big Screens

GIVEAWAYS & FREE $50 BOARD Trivia with Club 90 “Cash” Prize.

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40 | NOVEMBER 27, 2014

JOHNNY

he profiles all begin the same way: Sturgill Simpson is here to save country music. Since the release of his brilliant and mystifying second solo album, Metamodern Sounds in Country Music, in May, Simpson has been held on high as the new badass icon of outlaw country, a burly-voiced songwriter who eschews tailgates and spring break for deep thinking. Over classic honky-tonk shuffles more Buck Owens than Brad Paisley, he sings about mind-altering psychedelics and reptile aliens on “Turtles All the Way Down,” and name-checks transmigration and the Tibetan bardos in the two-step trot of “Just Let Go.” By outward appearances, Simpson is a piece of 24-grit sandpaper—and a welcome one, depending on who’s asked—to Nashville’s glassy, glossy, stadium-ready sheen. But to hear Simpson tell it, he has no interest in merely eliciting reactions or marketing his music under the guise of revolt. He’s simply a dude who plays what he likes and what he wants to hear. “A lot of journalists, it feels like they want to lure me into being the poster boy, and talk shit about modern country, and I just don’t have anything to really offer there,” Simpson told Rolling Stone in June. (Perhaps fearing yet another baiting, Simpson’s PR team declined City Weekly’s interview request.) “Nothing is really different than it was. It ’s always been like this. I think Tompall Glaser said it best in the ’70s: ‘Unless you have a solution or an

alternative, shut the fuck up. Because you’re just part of the problem.’ ” The most significant changes in country music have largely come from outsiders offering solutions: Buck Owens and Merle Haggard, who helped define the Bakersfield sound, the gritty contrast to the slickly produced, string-laden country music produced by Nashville’s Music Row in the ’50s; Waylon Jennings, Willie Nelson and the progressive outlaws who expanded country into the counterculture in the ’70s. Simpson, similarly, is an outsider. He lives in Nashville, but he and his wife rarely venture into the city. He self-released Metamodern Sounds because he knew Nashville wouldn’t touch it: The major labels, he reasoned, would have laughed at the references to reptilian aliens in “Turtles All the Way Down”; the traditionalists, on the other hand, wouldn’t jibe with the song’s thesis statement that “Love’s the only thing that ever saved my life.” Simpson demurs when asked to position himself as an alternative to the Jason Aldeans and Florida-Georgia Lines churned out en masse by the glitzy Nashville machine, but his chart success—not to mention his string of soldout concert dates—suggests he might be any way. Despite a total lack of support from a city that wouldn’t have him and without the rigmarole of the Music Row hype machine, Metamodern Sounds has nonetheless spent almost half the year in the top 25 of Billboard’s Hot Country chart, peaking at No. 11. It currently sits at No. 26 on the Hot Country chart, and at No. 133 (down from a peak of No. 59) on Billboard’s Top 200. The data seems to hint at a mainstream audience ready and eager to embrace new, rougher and more earnest voices. “Maybe people really just want to hear somebody sound like Waylon Jennings, so it could all just be psychosomatic,” Simpson said with a shrug to NPR. “I don’t know.” Waylon’s son Shooter is an avowed fan of Simpson’s. So is former Drive-By Trucker and recent tourmate Jason Isbell. But so, too, are stadium-country stars Keith Urban and Jake Owen. As the story goes, The Velvet Underground sold only 30,000 copies of its debut record, but everyone who bought that album went on to start a band. Who’s to say Metamodern Sounds won’t spark its own Bakersfield-esque movement? Who’s to say that maybe somewhere down the road, Kenny Chesney won’t be singing his own honky-tonk songs about DMT and alien abductions to sold-out stadium crowds? OK, no, probably not. But wouldn’t that be something? CW

w/Lucette The State Room 638 S. State Friday, Nov. 28 9 p.m. Sold out TheStateRoom.com

NOV 25: 8 PM DOORS NIGHT #1

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FLASH & FLARE GRAVY.TRON THE MANORLANDS PROJECT (FEATURING JOEL PACK)

PLAYING GHOSTS STEPHANIE MABEY

DEC 5:

DUBWISE FEATURING SHANK AARON

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JOSHUA JAMES TIMMY THE TEETH

9 PM DOORS

8PM DOORS

NOVEMBER 27, 2014 | 41

Jan 19: Aesop Rock w/ Rob Sonic Jan 22: Saga Outdoor Retailers Party Jan 23: Hell’s Belles Jan 24: Hell’s Belles Jan 27: Heaps & Heaps Jan 28: FREE SHOW Scenic Byway Jan 29: Breakers Jan 30: Tokimonsta Feb 11: St. Paul & The Broken Bones Feb 12: Cursive Feb 13: Ariel Pink Feb 15: The Floozies Feb 27: ZION I Mar 31: Stars Apr 21: Twin Shadow

| CITY WEEKLY |

Red Telephone Dec 31: Max Pain & The Groovies, Flash & Flare, Matty Mo Jan 1: First Mistakes Party Jan 2: DUBWISE Jan 3: The North Valley & Albino Father Album Release Jan 7: FREE SHOW L’Anarchiste Jan 8: Pleasure Thieves Jan 9: Big Wild Wings Jan 10: DIRT FIRST Jan 12: Zola Jesus Jan 14: FREE SHOW Beachmen Jan 15: Seven Feathers Rainwater Jan 16: Nightfreq Jan 17: Desert Noises

COMING SOON Dec 8: Spoon @ The Depot Dec 9: Jerry Joseph, Starmy Dec 10: FREE SHOW The Circulars Dec 11: FREE SHOW Hip Hop Roots with Lost Dec 12: SLUG LOCALIZED Dec 13: The Grouch & Eligh and Cunninlynguists Dec 15: Augustana Dec 17: Blackalicious Dec 18: The Bee (Early) Dec 18: Nightfreq (Late) Dec 19: FREE SHOW Devil Whale Of A Christmas Dec 20: 10th Annual Cocktail Party Dec 23: FREE SHOW Giraffula Dec 26: Playscool presents PE: Phundamental Education Dec 27: Eagle Twin & Cult Leader Dec 30: PSYCH LAKE CITY NYE NIGHT #1: Dark Seas, Breakers, Season Of The Witch,

NOV 26: JUST ANNOUNCED:

MY BRIGHTEST DIAMOND FLASH & FLARE

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Join us at Rye Diner and Drinks for dinner and craft cocktails before, during and after the show. Late night bites 6pm-midnight Monday through Saturday and brunch everyday of the week. Rye is for early birds and late owls and caters to all ages www.ryeslc.com

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Iceburn Local guitarist, vocalist and composer Gentry Densley stays plenty busy writing music and gigging with his main project, sludge-metal duo Eagle Twin. But once in a blue moon, he reunites with the lineup of cult favorite Iceburn—which he founded in 1991—and melts the faces of its staunchly devoted fans, like at this rare show, which is possibly the first since the group briefly got back together for a couple of performances in 2012. If you’re unfamiliar, Iceburn was so experimental and idiosyncratic in its heyday that it earned occult descriptors like “jazzcore” and “progressivepsych-jazz” for its abrasive, mind-bendingly intricate blend of jazz, metal, classical and punk that was years ahead of its time—for proof, just listen to 1993’s Hephaestus. Similiarly heavy bands La Verkin and Baby Gurl are also on the bill. The Urban Lounge, 241 S. 500 East, 10 p.m., $8, TheUrbanLoungeSLC. com; limited no-fee tickets available at CityWeeklyStore.com The Maxies These days, there are numerous musicians who are making meaningful and thoughtprovoking forays into unknown sonic realms. The Maxies are doing the opposite. Originally from Nuuk, Greenland, but now based in Southern California, The Maxies are a group of goons (and one guy in a polar-bear suit) who wear coordinating red shorts, button-down white shirts and creepy half-face mustachioed masks as they “show how make best super punk-rock party and spread Maxie mania,”

The Maxies

LIVE

according to their online bio. While being as offensive and immature as possible, The Maxies play loud, fast pop-punk in the vein of NOFX, Sum 41 and Bowling for Soup, as heard on their latest album, 2011’s Greenland Is Melting. And the kids love it; typical Maxies shows are basically one big mosh pit. Sturgeon General, The Beam Me Up Ska-Ts and HiFi Murder will open. Bar Deluxe, 666 S. State, 9 p.m., $7 in advance, $10 day of show, BarDeluxeSLC.com

Saturday 11.29

Ryan Shupe & the RubberBand Christmas Concert It might still be November, but that doesn’t mean it’s too early to enjoy some Christmas music—once Thanksgiving is past, it’s all “Deck the Halls” and “Joy to the World” till January. This year, kick off your Christmasmusic season with a holiday concert by Salt Lake City newgrass/rock/folk band Ryan Shupe & the RubberBand. Fronted by fiddle master and lead vocalist Ryan Shupe, The RubberBand play eclectic, upbeat music that may be tough to categorize but is always conducive to a good time. And as shown by their 2002 Christmas album, The Gift, Ryan Shupe & the RubberBand are skilled in putting their own fun spin on classic holiday songs like “Carol of the Bells,” “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer” and more, re-imagining them with lots of strings, smooth vocal harmonies and trademark RubberBand energy. Peery’s Egyptian Theater, 2415 Washington Blvd., Ogden, 7:30 p.m., adults $18 in advance, $32 day of show; children/students/military/seniors $15 in advance, $30 day of show, PeerysEgyptianTheaterOgden.com

COMPLETE LISTINGS ONLINE

CITYWEEKLY.NET

BY KO L B IE S TO N EH O CK ER

@vonstonehocker

Ryan Shupe & the RubberBand

Monday 12.1

Pageantry At first blush, the music produced by Denton, Texas, trio Pageantry feels like dreamy yet hazy pop. But it doesn’t take long for complicated elements like intricately arranged drum lines and odd time signatures to add new wrinkles, creating a sound the band calls “pop-gaze” (somewhere between pop, shoegaze and math rock). Pageantry’s debut EP, 2013’s Friends of the Year, is an intoxicating combination of halcyon synths, tension-wrought rhythms and arresting falsetto vocals by Roy Robertson that tickles the brain and pierces the heart. The band

Pageantry

jimmy alford

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42 | NOVEMBER 27, 2014

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44 | NOVEMBER 27, 2014

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The Manorlands Project is currently finishing up its first full-length, which has no official release date yet; in the meantime, visit Pageantryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bandcamp to listen to the delicate, atmospheric single â&#x20AC;&#x153;Spine,â&#x20AC;? released in October. Kilby Court, 741 S. Kilby Court (330 West), 8 p.m., $7, KilbyCourt.com

Tuesday 12.2

The Manorlands Project With its months of hazy, bone-cracking cold, winter is enough to drive anyone nuts; in the case of The Manorlands Project, the poprock trio poured all that snow-induced crazy into making music. In January 2013, Joel Pack, Rob Moffitt and Ryan Sanders carted all their instruments and recording gear to a remote, snowbound cabin in Manor Lands in the Uintas with the goal of recording some unreleased songs written under their previous band name, Broke City. But over the next 10 snowy days, they also created a handful of new tracksâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;about cabin fever, zombie flies and moreâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;inspired by the experience, and combined the new and old material into an album titled Winter, released in August under The Manorlands Project. At this show, The Manorlands Project will perform songs from Winter as well as unreleased tracks that didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t make the final cut. Local experimental-rock outfit Playing Ghosts and singer-songwriter Stephanie Mabey will open. The Urban Lounge, 241 S. 500 East, 9 p.m., free, TheUrbanLoungeSLC.com

Coming Soon Desert Noises (Dec. 5-6, Velour, Provo), The Original Wailers (Dec. 6, Park City Live), Joshua James (Dec. 6, The Urban Lounge), Lemuria (Dec. 8, Kilby Court), Spoon (Dec. 8, The Depot), Battle of the Bands (Dec. 8-13, Velour, Provo), Molotov (Dec. 9, The Complex), Suicidal Tendencies (Dec. 9, The Depot)

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THANKSGIVING DINNER! OPENS @ 4PM

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FRI 11/28

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NOVEMBER 27, 2014 | 45

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46 | NOVEMBER 27, 2014

REAKS... B E H T L L A T E G E L P O E ME P

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Complete listings online @ cityweekly.net

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Thursday 11.27

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Live Band Karaoke With TIYB (Club 90) Jazz Joint Thursday With Mark Chaney and The Garage All Stars (The Garage) Robot Dream (Gracieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s) Karaoke (Habits) DJ Erockalypze (Inferno Cantina) Sounds Like Teen Spirit (Liquid Joeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s) Open Mic (Patâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Barbecue) Karaoke (Willieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Lounge) Reggae Thursday: Coral Thief (The Woodshed)

Park City Cowboy Karaoke (Ciseroâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s) Local Vibes With DJ Kemosabe (Downstairs)

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Friday 11.28 Salt Lake City The Maxies, Sturgeon General, Beam Me Up Ska-Ts, HiFi Murder (Bar Deluxe) Paid in Full (Club 90) Cory Mon (The Garage) Apres Ski With DJ Gawel, DJ Matty Mo (Gracieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s) DJ Scotty B (Habits) Marinade (The Hog Wallow Pub) DJ Bentley, Luva Luva (Inferno Cantina) Tony Holiday (Johnnyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s on Second) Sturgill Simpson, Lucette (The State Room, sold out, see p. 40) Iceburn, La Verkin, Baby Gurl (The Urban Lounge) Kaleb Austin (The Westerner)

Ogden Black Friday With Joe Friday (Brewskis) 7 Day Diablo (The Outlaw Saloon)

Park City Rage Against the Supremes (The Spur Bar & Grill) DJ Chris Kennedy (Downstairs)

Utah County DJ Jarvicious (The Madison)

Saturday 11.29 Salt Lake City The Family Gallows Album Release Show, Canvas Heart, Redd Johnson (Bar Deluxe) Paid in Full (Club 90) Controlled Burn (The Garage) Chaseone2 (Gracieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s) Life in Color Unleash Featuring Adventure Club (The Great Saltair) DJ Scotty B (Habits) Son of Ian (The Hog Wallow Pub) DJ Erockalypze (Inferno Cantina) The Spazmatics (Liquid Joeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s) Bastard Feast, Plague Widow, Die Off (MusicGarage.org) The Party Rockers (The Royal) DJ E-Flexx, Karaoke With DJ B-Rad (Sandy Station) Flash & Flare, Gravytron (The Urban Lounge) Kaleb Austin (The Westerner)

Ogden The Breakfast Klub (Brewskis) 7 Day Diablo (The Outlaw Saloon)

Park City DJ Mom Jeans (Downstairs) Lake Effect (The Spur Bar & Grill)

Sunday 11.30 Salt Lake City Eighth Day (5 Monkeys) Live Bluegrass (Club 90) The Steel Belts (Donkey Tails)

JOIN US DECEMBER 6TH AT 7PM FOR THE

CONCERTS & CLUBS Complete listings online @ cityweekly.net The Last Honkytonk Music Series (The Garage) Karaoke Church With DJ Ducky & Mandrew (Jam) Entourage Karaoke (Piper Down) Sunday Funday Karaoke (Three Alarm Saloon) Karaoke That Doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t Suck (The Woodshed)

Ogden Karaoke Wheel of Chance With KJ Sparetire (The Century Club)

Park City Open Mic (Ciseroâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s) Open Mic (The Spur Bar & Grill)

Monday 12.1 Salt Lake City

MOVEMBER

Salt Lake City Karaoke (5 Monkeys) Open Mic (Alchemy Coffee) Nights to Remember: DJ Jpan, DJ Bentley (Canyon Inn) Karaoke With KJ Sauce (Club 90) Hell Jam (Devilâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Daughter) Red Rock Hot Club (Gracieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s) Attila, Crown the Empire, Like Moths to Flames, Sworn In (In the Venue/Club Sound) Karaoke (Keys on Main) Lil Debbie, GODZ, Caskey, Chi City, Swell Merchants, The Astro Knots, Pookiie (The Loading Dock) Open Mic (The Royal) Taboo Tuesday Karaoke (Three Alarm Saloon) The Manorlands Project, Playing Ghosts, Stephanie Mabey (The Urban Lounge) Karaoke That Doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t Suck (The Woodshed)

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Jazz Session (Gracieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s) Open Blues Jam (The Green Pig Pub) Snot, He Is Legend, Zombiecock, Anew Revolution (In the Venue/Club Sound) Pageantry (Kilby Court) Kurt Travis, Hotel Books, Tommy Boys, I Buried the Box With Your Name (MusicGarage.org) DJ Babylon Down, Roots Rawka (The Woodshed)

Tuesday 12.2

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48 | NOVEMBER 27, 2014

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Lil Debbie When Kreayshawnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s single â&#x20AC;&#x153;Gucci Gucciâ&#x20AC;? was released in 2011, Lil Debbie could be seen next to her in the music video, silently dancing and smoking. They were originally part of the rap group White Girl Mob along with rapper V-Nasty, and although the girls have since disbanded, Lil Debbie continues to do well for herself. After moving to Los Angeles to pursue a solo career, she collaborated with rapper Riff Raff and released her first EP, Queen D, and released not one but two mixtapes in 2014: California Sweetheart and California Sweetheart Pt. 2. Lil Debbie may look sweet and delicate, but her music oozes swagger and confidence with lyrics that might make even the most hardened rapper blush. Caskey, GODZ, Chi City, Swell Merchants, The Astro Knots and Pookiie are also on the bill. (Rebecca Frost) Tuesday, Dec. 2 @ The Loading Dock, 445 S. 400 West, 6:30 p.m., $15 in advance, $20 day of show, LoadingDockSLC.com

Wednesday 12.3 Salt Lake City Karaoke With Steve-O (5 Monkeys) Karaoke (Area 51) Jim Guss Trio (Bleu Bistro) Karaoke Wheel of Chance With KJ Sparetire (The Century Club) Bassjackers, Dyro, Jay Hardway, Kenneth G, Nate Lowpass (The Complex) Karaoke Wednesday (Devilâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Daughter) Rockabilly Wednesday (The Garage) Nate Robinson Trio (Gracieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s) DJ Street Jesus (The Green Pig Pub) Rick Gerber (The Hog Wallow Pub) Stray From the Path, Kublai Khan, Fit for a King (In the Venue/Club Sound) Wednesduhh! Karaoke (Jam) Open Mic (Liquid Joeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s)

Entourage Karaoke (Piper Down) Karaoke (The Royal) Karaoke With DJ B-Rad (Sandy Station) My Brightest Diamond, Flash & Flare (The Urban Lounge, see p. 38) Karaoke (The Wall) DJ Matty Mo (Willieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Lounge) Jam Night Featuring Dead Lake Trio (The Woodshed)

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i slept with my best friend’s husband

ÂŠ 2014

BY DAVID LEVINSON WILK

Across

Last weekâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s answers

Solutions available on request via e-mail: Sudoku@cityweekly.net.

1. Barack Obama, astrologically 2. Alphabetically first state: Abbr. 3. Route through a park, maybe 4. Essayist Didion 5. Void 6. Half of an interrogation team 7. Puts together 8. Prefix with athlete

51. Kaplan course subj. 53. They go down when it's cold 56. "As I Lay Dying" father 57. Trim 59. Prefix with light 60. Swell 62. "____ Maria" 63. Sun

No math is involved. The grid has numbers, but nothing has to add up to anything else. Solve the puzzle with reasoning and logic. Solving time is typically 10 to 30 minutes, depending on your skill and experience.

Down

9. 2011 acquirer of the Huffington Post 10. Acquire 11. Yahoo! acquired it in 2013 12. Equilibria 16. Salon treatment 18. Nut 21. His New York Times obit mentioned he "blew on a motor horn, chewed thermometers and never spoke" 23. Bottom-of-letter abbr. 24. Harbor vessel 26. 24-Down and others 27. End result 29. "You got that right!" 31. Santa's little helper 34. Hockey great Cam 36. Kind of insurance 38. With 40-Down, an Italian Riviera city 39. "It seems to me ..." 40. See 38-Down 43. The "D" of DJIA 44. Dress shop compliment 45. Pull some strings, maybe 46. Dash of "Clueless" 48. Leaves a 0% tip

Complete the grid so that each row, column, diagonal and 3x3 square contain all of the numbers 1 to 9.

1. Chocolate ____ 4. Part of a political debate 7. ____ glance 10. Small change: Abbr. 13. Wallach of "The Misfits" 14. ____ moment's notice 15. Classless one? 17. Team portrayed in "Moneyball" 19. Catch-22 20. Harem guards 22. Confederate soldiers, for short 23. "Monday Night Football" airer 25. Hawaii's Mauna ____ 26. Furry buzzers 28. March Madness, with "the" 30. Before surgery, informally 32. 12-mo. periods 33. ____ candy 35. Ecto- or proto- ending 37. What revolutionary soldiers at the Battle of Bunker Hill were ordered to wait to see before firing, according to legend 41. Half of half-and-half 42. Like newly-laid lawns 44. Subj. of the book "Many Unhappy Returns" 47. Bones next to humeri 49. Italian lover's coo 50. Classic Blend and British Blend, for two 52. Some football linemen: Abbr. 54. Gloat 55. Subway stops: Abbr. 56. Armpits 58. Cancun's locale 61. Chills, so to speak 64. Ring combos 65. Org. that holds trials 66. Actress Gardner 67. 180 68. "South Park" boy 69. XXX-XX-XXXX fig. 70. Kobe cash

SUDOKU

| cityweekly.net |

| CITY WEEKLY |

50 | NOVEMBER 27, 2014

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NOVEMBER 27, 2014 | 51

Murphy’s emphasis on a welcoming vibe is understandable when you know his favorite part of working at Tea Zaanti is the people. “We’ve met so many wonderful and interesting people,” Murphy says. “Many of them have found us just walking by and have ended up spending an hour or more just hanging out and talking.” The tea house includes a beautiful “CommuniTea” room for use by small

groups of people and charities. Tea Zaanti also donates a portion of profits to local and international charities. They support local talent by displaying art by local artists in gallery spaces. Murphy prides himself on Tea Zaanti’s emphasis on all levels of community. “We only work with tea gardens and importers that strive to improve the lives of the farmers and families working for them,” he explains. When asked to name his favorite product at Tea Zaanti, Murphy says, “That’s like asking which of your children is your favorite.” His favorite changes by the day. Right now, he’s partial to the GABA oolong tea. Murphy would recommend a first-time patron check out the TeaZer Wall, a collection of color-coded sample tins of tea on a magnetic framework. Tea Zaanti employees will ask your general flavor likes and dislikes and work from there. “I haven’t found that there’s one particular tea for everyone, but I do believe there is a tea for everyone,” says Murphy. “Our job is to help find out what that might be.” Tea Zaanti can also personalize any tin. Tea Zaanti has unique tin canisters that their customers love. “Our tins are quite popular,” says Murphy. Customers can bring back empty tins for refills at a bulk rate. Customers can stop by the Tea Zaanti shop Monday through Thursday from 10:00 a.m. to 7:00 p.m., Friday and Saturday from 10:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m., and Sundays from 10:00 a.m. to 3:00 p.m. Customers can also order online at http://www.teazaanti. com. For more information, follow them on Instagram at @teazaanti or check them out on Facebook at https://www.facebook. com/TeaZaanti. n

| cityweekly.net |

s temperatures continue to drop, tea addicts will find a cozy refuge in Tea Zaanti, a new tea house located at 1324 South 1100 East in Salt Lake City. Co-owned and operated by Brian Murphy, Tea Zaanti features a wide variety of teas and freshly baked goods. According to Murphy, the vision for Tea Zaanti began about seven years ago after a tour of mulberry tree farms while visiting Thailand. The business itself began in earnest five years ago as an online tea shop. “We gradually expanded into wholesale and now retail,” Murphy explains. Tea Zaanti’s owners searched for the right location to open their store for about 18 months. “When we found our Sugarhouse location, it just felt right,” Murphy says. “With a lot of hard work and support from friends and family—and customers!—we celebrated the grand opening of our first retail location on October 4.” Tea Zaanti’s atmosphere is relaxing and inviting. “It is so rewarding to hear people say how relaxed they feel spending time here,” Murphy says. “Our goal was to make a space that felt like you’d walked into a good friend’s home, and I think we’ve accomplished that.”

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FREE WILL ASTROLOGY B Y R O B

B R E Z S N Y

Go to RealAstrology.com for Rob Brezsny’s expanded weekly audio horoscopes and daily text-message horoscopes. Audio horoscopes also available by phone at 877-873-4888 or 900-950-7700.

ARIES (March 21-April 19) What exactly do you believe in, Aries? What’s your philosophy of life? Do you think that most people are basically good and that you can make a meaningful life for yourself if you just work hard and act kind? Do you believe that evil, shapeshifting, kitten-eating extraterrestrials have taken on human form and are impersonating political leaders who control our society? Are you like the character Crash Davis in the film Bull Durham, who believed in “high fiber, good scotch, the sweet spot and long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days”? Now would be an excellent time for you to get very clear about the fundamental principles that guide your behavior. Re-commit yourself to your root beliefs—and jettison the beliefs that no longer work for you. TAURUS (April 20-May 20) I have two encyclopedias of dreams, and they disagree on the symbolic meaning of mud. One book says that when you dream of mud, you may be facing a murky moral dilemma in your waking life, or are perhaps dealing with a messy temptation that threatens to compromise your integrity. The other encyclopedia suggests that when you dream of mud, it means you have received an untidy but fertile opportunity that will incite growth and creativity. I suspect that you have been dreaming of mud lately, Taurus, and that both meanings apply to you.

printing industry. According to its system of classification, there are 104 various shades of grey. I suspect you will benefit from being equally discerning in the coming weeks. It just won’t be possible to differentiate between the good guys and the bad guys. You’ll misunderstand situations that you try to simplify, and you’ll be brilliant if you assume there’s always more nuance and complexity to uncover. Don’t just grudgingly tolerate ambiguity, Libra. Appreciate it. Learn from it. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21) I am not necessarily predicting that you will acquire a shiny new asset in time for the solstice. Nor am I glibly optimistic that you will get a raise in pay or an unexpected bonus. And I can offer only a 65-percent certainty that you will snag a new perk or catch a financial break or stumble upon a treasure. In general, though, I am pretty confident that your net worth will rise in the next four weeks. Your luck will be unusually practical. To take maximum advantage of the cosmic tendencies, focus your efforts on the one or two most promising prospects.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) Galileo Galilei (1564-1642) was an Italian astronomer, physicist, and mathematician who is sometimes called “the father of modern science.” He expressed his innovative ideas so vigorously that he offended the Catholic Church, which convicted him of heresy. For GEMINI (May 21-June 20) us today, he symbolizes the magnificence of rational thought. And Are there certain influences you would love to bring into your yet Galileo also had a weird streak. For example, he gave lectures life, but you can’t figure out how? Do you fantasize about getting on the “Shape, Location and Size of Dante’s Inferno,” analyzing access to new resources that would make everything better for the poet’s depiction of hell. In the course of these meticulous you, but they seem to be forever out of reach? If you answered discourses, Galileo concluded that Satan was more than four“yes,” it’s time to stop moping. I’m happy to report that you have fifths of a mile tall. In this spirit, Sagittarius, and in accordance more power than usual to reel in those desirable influences and with current astrological omens, you are temporarily authorized to resources. To fully capitalize on this power, be confident that you de-emphasize the constraints of reason and logic so that you may can attract what you need. gleefully and unapologetically pursue your quirky proclivities.

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NOVEMBER 27, 2014 | 53

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22) The Pantone Color Matching System presents a structured approach to identifying colors. It’s used as a standard in the

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20) “Dogs don’t know where they begin and end,” writes Ursula K. Le Guin in her book The Wave in the Mind. They “don’t notice when they put their paws in the quiche.” Cats are different, LeGuin continues. They “know exactly where they begin and end. When they walk slowly out the door that you are holding open for them, and pause, leaving their tail just an inch or two inside the door, they know it. They know you have to keep holding the door open ... It’s a cat’s way of maintaining relationship.” Whether you are more of a dog person or a cat person, Pisces, it is very important that you be more like a cat than a dog in the coming weeks. You must keep uppermost in your mind exactly where you begin and where you end.

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VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) Helsinki, Finland is growing downward. By cutting out space in the bedrock below the city’s surface, farseeing leaders have made room to build shops, a data center, a hockey rink, a church and a swimming pool. There are also projects underway to construct 200 other underground structures. I’d like to see you start working along those lines, Virgo—at least metaphorically. Now would be an excellent time to renovate your foundations so as to accommodate your future growth.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) In her book Revolution from Within, Gloria Steinem offers a challenge: “Think of the times you have said: ‘I can’t write,’ ‘I can’t paint,’ ‘I can’t run,’ ‘I can’t shout,’ ‘I can’t dance,’ ‘I can’t sing.’” That’s your first assignment, Aquarius: Think of those times. Your second assignment is to write down other “I can’t” statements you have made over the years. Assignment three is to objectively evaluate whether any of these “I can’t” statements are literally true. If you find that some of them are not literally true, your fourth assignment is to actually do them. The coming weeks will be a favorable time to transform “I can’t” into “I can.”

Start Now!!!

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) I know you’re beautiful and you know you’re beautiful. But I think you could be even more beautiful than you already are. What do you think? Have you reached the limits of how beautiful you can be? Or will you consider the possibility that there is even more beauty lying dormant within you, ready to be groomed and expressed? I encourage you to ruminate on these questions: 1. Are you hiding a complicated part of your beauty because it would be hard work to liberate it? 2. Are you afraid of some aspect of your beauty because revealing it would force you to acknowledge truths about yourself that are at odds with your self-image? 3. Are you worried that expressing your full beauty would intimidate other people?

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) While in his early twenties, actor Robert Downey Jr. appeared in the films Less Than Zero and Weird Science. That got him semi-typecast as a member of Hollywood’s Brat Pack, a group of popular young actors and actresses who starred in comingof-age films in the 1980s. Eager to be free of that pigeonhole, Downey performed a ritual in 1991: He dug a hole in his backyard and buried the clothes he had worn in Less Than Zero. I recommend that you carry out a comparable ceremony to help you graduate from the parts of your past that are holding you back.

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CANCER (June 21-July 22) Should you cut back and retrench? Definitely. Should you lop off and bastardize? Definitely not. Do I recommend that you spend time editing and purifying? Yes, please. Does this mean you should censor and repress? No, thank you. Here’s my third pair of questions: Will you be wise enough to shed some of your defense mechanisms and strip away one of your lame excuses? I hope so. Should you therefore dispense with all of your psychic protections and leave yourself vulnerable to being abused? I hope not.

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54 | NOVEMBER 27, 2014

WITH BABS DELAY Broker, Urban Utah Homes & Estates, urbanutah.com Chair, Downtown Merchants Association

City Views: Saint Jennie

57 west 200 south in the heart of Downtown SLC please send resumes to: SLCJOBS@elitepayglobal.com

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t may be hard to believe that the area surrounding most of the homeless shelters and The Road Home used to be even sketchier than it is now. Basically, all that’s changed in 150 years is some newer buildings and asphalt roads covering the red dirt…and the addition of an angel named Jennie Dudley. I remember in 1985 when a blue-eyed local cowgirl brought a holy kind of Chuck Wagon to the neighborhood and caused a tiny ripple of goodness. Inside her wagon/ trailer are all the fixin’s to cook a Sunday brunch. Every Sunday and big holiday, she arrives and with the help of volunteers, unloads tables, coffee pots, cups, plates, grills and plastic laundry baskets under the freeway ramps at 600 West and 600 South and waits. With a ranching and outfitting background, Jennie says that she found God and that he could speak to her in “ranch language.” He told her: “Jennie, when you have hungry people out back, you send a Chuck Wagon.” And she did. She’s an ordained Christian minister and founder of the Eagle Ranch Ministries. Jennie is living proof of what good can do and we all need to pay it forward. You see, she doesn’t show up with any food. She prays and trusts that God will arrive with volunteers and food. And they do. I have never listened to her sermons but hear hymns being sung as they are blasted through an amplifier at the hungry lining up to eat. No one goes without food, a hug and a smile before they return to the streets—car or no car. My wife reminded me that we wouldn’t be here this Thanksgiving and couldn’t do our “Jennie drive by” for the first time in years. We rushed to the grocery store and picked up several boneless cooked hams and then to another store to get dozens of warms hats, gloves and socks. Jennie sets up at 8:30 a.m. on Sundays and is there until 11 or so, and it’s easy to do a drive and drop. On 200 South, turn South at 600 West and drive a few blocks south of UTA’s Central Station. There’s no list of what to bring—just use your own logic. Jennie says, “There’s more women and children showing up than I’ve ever seen before!” Go help by doing a drive and drop yourself. Ask for Jennie and slip her some cash for us, okay? She’s lookin’ mighty tired these days, but she’s still a great hugger in her big ol’ white cowgirl hat! n

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DID THAT HURT? tattoos, piercings, & broken bones Jeremiah Smith

#didthathurtslc You may also email it to us at community@cityweekly.net

Your home could be sold here. Call me for a free market analysis today. SEE VIRTUAL TOURS AT URBANUTAH.COM

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