City Weekly July 30, 2015

C I T Y W E E K LY . N E T

J U LY 3 0 , 2 0 1 5 | V O L . 3 2

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RIVER OF NO RETURN A trip down Idaho’s wild and protected rivers shows the wisdom in saving something.

BY COLBY FRAZIER

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CWCONTENTS COVER STORY RIVER OF NO RETURN

A trip down Idaho’s wild and protected rivers shows the wisdom in saving something.

Cover photo by Colby Frazier

18 4 LETTERS 6 OPINION 8 NEWS 22 A&E 30 DINE 37 CINEMA 40 TRUE TV 41 MUSIC 51 COMMUNITY

CONTRIBUTOR DEREK EDWARDS

Five Spot, p. 8 Decidedly a bit out of touch with his Mormon roots, this intern enjoys talking state politics and being a supersenior at the University of Utah. When not at school or the office, he spends his time exploring Utah’s mountainous backcountry.

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LETTERS Change Dealership Laws

Hey, Utah legislators: I want a Tesla!

A 2016-17 Tesla model goes for around $36,000. I will buy this car even if it means buying it out of state, which means Utah would lose the revenue from sales tax. A ridiculous law requires cars to be purchased from franchise dealers, not manufacturers.

As far as I can tell, the law was put in place to keep car manufacturers from setting up franchises that would cannibalize each other. Why a company would need a law to stop this behavior is only one of a giant list of problems with the way automakers do business.

Another is: Why do manufacturers build cars that need complex servicing—work preferably done at the dealership.

They are operating on a flawed business model, and affordable electric cars could force them to change it.

The range of most Tesla models is 200-270 miles on a charge. The average American drives 37 miles a day, so that’s plenty of miles for 90 percent of people.

There is virtually nothing to the Tesla automobile. It is literally a bank of batteries with a motor to drive the wheels. This means no oil changes or mechanics telling you, “The O2 sensor that monitors the rear-view mirror has to be replaced.” The Tesla Model S has two motors. It can go from being an all-wheel-drive winter vehicle to a rearwheel-drive sports sedan, depending on the driver’s needs.

Teslas will autopilot and park themselves. You pull up

WRITE US: Salt Lake City Weekly, 248 S. Main, Salt Lake City, UT 84101. E-mail: comments@cityweekly.net. Fax: 801-575-6106.

We reserve the right to edit for length and clarity. Preference will be given to letters that are 300 words or less and sent uniquely to City Weekly. Full name, address and phone number must be included, even on e-mailed submissions, for verification purposes. to a tight parking spot and tell the car to park and it does a perfect three-point parallel park. You get home and tell the car to park in the garage and it does. You will be able to summon the car (on private property).

That’s like something out of an Iron Man movie.

I don’t think it matters what your political affiliation is.

How about supporting something that will make cleaner air? Why not drive a car that is almost as fast as a Porsche?

How about driving a car that costs $5 to fill instead of $60?

Why not have Utah lead the way to the future for once?

JUSTIN WOOD Salt Lake City

Set the Record Straight

A recent City Weekly article [“Mayoral Wild Cards,” July 23] said that I was a retired naval officer, that I live near Memory Grove, and that I worked in cell phones in Utah.

Those statements are inaccurate.

I have always maintained that I spent six years in the Navy and that I left because I did not agree with some decisions at the national level. I consider it an insult to maintain an inaccurate history, so please ensure that you do not repeat this untrue statement.

I live near 1300 South and 1100 East, not Memory Grove, and I worked for cell-phone, radio-frequency and nuclear companies but only in San Diego. Although I traveled throughout the world as a consultant and contractor, it is

inaccurate to say that I worked for Utah companies during my career.

Please change the story to reflect the truth. I do appreciate the time that staff writer Eric Peterson took to interview me, and I especially appreciated the note about the Wasatch Front Regional Council—information that I hope will be the subject of a bigger story.

The proposed transportation tax increase will go to projects. In a recent Take 2 program hosted by Rod Decker, Mayor Becker said that the tax would go to UTA service.

That is a lie.

GEORGE CHAPMAN Salt Lake City mayoral candidate Salt Lake City

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(Un)free to Believe

6 | JULY 30, 2015

BY ERIC ETHINGTON

to believe as they will; and that their beliefs or non-beliefs “shall in nowise diminish, enlarge, or affect their civil capacities.”

How important was this groundbreaking concept to Jefferson? On his tombstone, he listed his top three accomplishments in life: writing the Declaration of Independence, founding the University of Virginia and writing the Virginia Statute for Religious Freedom. Even his presidency wasn’t as important.

The bill was then ushered into law by James Madison, just one year before he traveled to Philadelphia to become one of the principle authors of the U.S. Constitution.

Religious freedom couldn’t be more clear: It is a shield to protect the beliefs of U.S. citizens from government and powerful institutions, but it also means that their religious beliefs can in no way be used to either elevate or diminish their capacity as citizens, or used to affect the civil capacities of others.

That definition was put to the test during the civilrights era, when business owners sought exemptions from civil-rights laws—such as desegregation—based on their religious beliefs. Many claimed that the government had no right to force them to serve people of color because it was against their sincerely held religious beliefs. Those arguments were quickly shot down in the courts, because the government was not writing a law dictating anyone’s beliefs— only that they must treat people equally in the public square.

Congress agreed in 1993, when it passed the Religious Freedom Restoration Act (RFRA). Spurred by Employment Division v.

Smith, a case that involved American Indians in Oregon being denied state benefits because they were fired for using peyote in religious ceremonies, it passed with wide bipartisan support and, unlike some of the

Religious freedom is one of those rare principles that both the Left and Right believe to be among the most important issues of our time. But what is religious freedom?

The definition shifts depending on who is talking and what they want to use it for.

During the 2015 legislative session, Utah lawmakers refused to pass basic housing and employment protections for LGBT people without also simultaneously passing an enhanced version of religious freedom, allowing certain businesses and institutions to be exempt from obeying the law if religious beliefs so dictated.

The resulting bill was co-written by Robin Fretwell Wilson, a leading Religious Right operative who advocates that religious individuals who own businesses should be exempted from civil-rights laws based on their religious beliefs. Wilson also wrote a 2010 paper arguing that government employees should be exempt from providing government services to those with whom they disagree on religious grounds.

Just prior to the Supreme Court issuing its June 26 decision legalizing same-sex marriage, Utah Sen. Mike Lee, R-Utah, introduced legislation in Congress to prevent any federal agency from denying a tax exemption, grant, contract, license or certification to an individual, association or business that may discriminate against LGBT individuals or couples based upon religious beliefs.

So what is the real definition of religious freedom? The first religious liberty law ever passed was written by none other than Thomas Jefferson. The Virginia Statute for Religious Freedom was the Founding Father’s way of countering the early colonies, which in the 1700s existed as miniature theocracies. The bill not only removed the Anglican Church as the official state church, but provided that no one can be compelled to attend any religious institution or to underwrite it with taxes; that individuals are free

recent state versions of the RFRA, specifically limited itself to actions taken by the government against individuals.

So what’s the difference between the Founders’ definition of religious freedom and what we’re seeing today? I contacted Sen. Lee to ask him how he defines religious liberty.

In an email, he says he believes it to be “[T] he right of individuals and associations to form their own religious beliefs and to act on those beliefs in private and public life.

Government’s role is to protect that universal freedom, and the space it provides people of all faiths, and no faith at all, to live out the dictates of conscience.”

That sounds pretty close to the original definition. But it also seems at odds with the provisions inside of the Senator’s new legislation, and with what the Utah Legislature passed earlier this year. The ability to pick and choose one’s beliefs or non-beliefs— and to change one’s mind—are paramount.

But according to Jefferson and Madison, real religious freedom means no individual, organization, business, institution or government has the right to wield beliefs like a sword—forcing others to choose between their individual conscience, or accessing their civil capacities.

It is already, and properly, unconstitutional to force religions, churches or clergy to perform religious ceremonies that violate their beliefs. But shielding businesses, organizations or institutions that are actively discriminating based on religious beliefs isn’t a protection of religious freedom. It could more closely be defined as a violation of religious freedom. CW Eric Ethington is a journalist, activist and researcher. He also works for Political Research Associates. Follow him on Twitter @EricEthington.

Send feedback to comments@cityweekly.net.

REAL RELIGIOUS FREEDOM MEANS NO INDIVIDUAL, ORGANIZATION, BUSINESS, INSTITUTION OR GOVERNMENT HAS THE RIGHT TO WIELD BELIEFS LIKE A SWORD

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Readers can comment at cityweekly.net

If you were to establish your own church, what would it be called?

Nicole Enright: My church would be the Church of Champagne. We would worship champagne, and our slogan would be: “May all your pain be champagne.”

Brandon Burt: The Church of Chill Out and Get a Grip. We will not recognize the authority of Sens. Mike Lee and Orrin Hatch to allow bigotry and discrimination to masquerade under the guise of religious freedom.

Robby Poffenberger:

Cat videos. The services would be simple and would never get old. Any use of cat puns, such as, “That service was purrfect,” or “That last video was meowerful,” would be grounds for excommunication. We aren’t here to laugh at each other. We’re here to laugh at cats.

Jeremiah Smith: If I were enough of a prophet, I would be spreading the good word about the teachings of Caseus, and its creamy wisdom. Praise be to Gouda!

Mason Rodrickc: The Church of Mind Your Own Business. Our first nine commandments are to mind the name of the church, the last one is to empty your wallet into the Alhambra water cooler bottle at the foot of my bed so we can save up to be sent back home. “Home” is London sometime in early fall of 2016.

Bryan Bale: The United Church of Bacon already exists (yes, it’s a real thing).

Tiffany Frandsen: We’d worship the holy coffee bean, but the religion would be called The Church of Progression and Altruism so we get credit for doing more than sitting around, drinking coffee and discussing all that is wrong with the world.

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HITS&MISSES

BY KATHARINE BIELE

FIVE SPOT

RANDOM QUESTIONS, SURPRISING ANSWERS

@kathybiele

Mural Wars

Maybe if they had been murals of hand-holding children, they wouldn’t have caused the grief they did. But with one mural at least—the one on the outside of the Azteca de Oro Taqueria—West Valley City officials have agreed to cool off for 30 days, according to a report from The Salt Lake Tribune. Big and colorful and ethnic, the community mural of Cesar Chavez and Dolores Huerta caused someone to complain. The city then said “the sign” covered too much area, because it covered more than 15 percent of the building’s facade. It might be a good idea for cities to consider more inclusive mural designations. That wouldn’t have helped Josh and Heida Belka whose Joe Hill mural on the side of the IATSE Local 99 at 526 W. 800 South in Salt Lake City was painted over with an American flag. That, apparently, was sparked by mean-spirited internal union politics—without the negotiations.

Gun Violence a Disease?

Salt Lake County District Attorney Sim Gill tipped over the edge after the latest mass shooting. Who didn’t? But in the case of all the mass shootings—and there have been many—the Second Amendment stands in the way of action. Mind you, this isn’t the real Second Amendment, but the perception that it is an inflexible mandate for all to carry and use any weapons any way they want. Gill simply calls for dialogue: “This is a social, political and public-health tragedy,” he says. But dialogue won’t be coming soon. For the past 20 years, Congress has refused to fund a study on gun violence by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, because “it’s not a disease.” Perhaps Congress refuses the funding out of fear that a study will inevitably lead to gun control. That fear is killing Americans.

No Country for Old Trees

Ignore something long enough, and it will go away—and not in a good way. That’s what happened this past week in Big Cottonwood Canyon, where more than 100 trees were mistakenly cut down. Some were planted in 1905 to prevent erosion, but Silver Hill LLC jumped the gun and cut down many more trees than its permit allowed, KSL 5 News reported. The project has stopped—at least for now.

Meanwhile, the drought-stricken West has just found out that the U.S. Forest Service has been allowing Nestle to pipe water out of the San Bernadino National Forest from a collection of wells “using a permit that lists an expiration date of 1988,” the California newspaper, the Desert Sun, reported.

Chris Manor is an organizer with the citizen advocacy group Utah Against Police Brutality, (Facebook.com/UtahAgainstPolicyBrutality), which began with street-level protests in response to the deaths of Michael Brown in Ferguson, Mo., and Utah residents Dillon Taylor and Darrien Hunt.

Currently organizing a cop watch (legal recording of police activity by community members), UAPB also educates citizens about their rights during police encounters—what they should and shouldn’t say to officers—and the legal leeway the police have in investigating citizens. Manor also works as a IATSE Local 99 stagehand and writes for Fight Back! News, a Minneapolis-based publication.

Who are your biggest ideological influences?

Marx and Lenin, as well as contemporary philosophers like Alain Badiou. However, as far as influence goes, it’s the things that happen in the community that get my attention. While I can interpret events through a particular ideological lens, it’s the people I meet who are struggling on a day-to-day basis with injustice that motivate me. What counts and matters most is how our actions change the world around us, according to our ideas of justice.

Isn’t a red state like Utah a difficult place to be a socialist?

Utah being a red state doesn’t mean the entire population is conservative. The dichotomy between liberal Democrat and conservative Republican isn’t at all politically interesting.

Politics happen when communities decide what issues matter to them, and through collective action, they strive to improve the conditions of their lives. The #BlackLivesMatter movement didn’t start from the premise of electoral politics or parties; it started in the streets.

Is there room for community-based political ideology in Utah?

This is an interesting issue in Utah. Conservative Utah politics are still found in a communitarian form. The organization of much of everyday life—through the Mormon church—is socially oriented as opposed to strictly individual. The problem is that this community is founded on incredibly exclusionary principles and practices, and the conservative attitude only acts as a justification for those with the privilege to get by. There’s no room for differences, and those who question the longstanding practices and policies usually don’t stick with the church, or often find themselves excommunicated. Will the church ever move past its patriarchal foundations?

What policy changes could radically reduce police brutality?

Without changing how officers are permitted to use deadly force against the community they presumably serve and protect, approaches such as getting officers to wear body cameras aren’t going to solve the problem. We need to change the framework which allows an officer to get away with a shooting. Police officers currently have the ability to use deadly force based on what they “reasonably believe” is happening in the heat of the moment. Dillon Taylor’s shooting was caught on body camera, and District Attorney Sim Gill used the letter of the law to justify the shooting. If the officer could shoot only in direct response to an existing threat and not an expressed belief, many more officers would be facing charges.

How can Utahns—regardless of political affiliation—battle police violence?

Issues like police brutality impact all members of the community. People can get involved with groups like UAPB (we host meetings at the Salt Lake City Main Library every month, which are open to the public) or start their own group. Movements are made up of different groups, where each group will focus on something different and use different methods of work to accomplish their goals. Not everybody has to work on the same thing or work in the same way.

—DEREK EDWARDS comments@cityweekly.net

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How do we know how to pronounce proper names in ancient Egyptian? I understand the Rosetta Stone gave us the ability to translate hieroglyphics, but how do we know two birds laying eggs is pronounced “Tutankhamun”?

—Dave K., Milford, Connecticut

Some are now thinking: who cares how we know this? This is shallow. Fact is, David, we do know, more or less. And how we know is a fascinating tale.

It won’t surprise you to learn our knowledge of how to pronounce Egyptian hieroglyphics begins with the Rosetta Stone. Discovered in 1799, the stone is a black granite-like slab on which a decree by Ptolemy V is inscribed in three languages—hieroglyphics, what’s now called demotic script, and ancient Greek. The message itself, issued in Memphis in 196 B.C., is of little consequence. (Short version: I, Ptolemy V, have done great deeds. Worship me, dudes.) What makes the Rosetta Stone special is that each language conveys an essentially identical message. In other words, the Rosetta Stone is a hieroglyphics cheat sheet.

The two researchers who vied to translate the Rosetta Stone were the French linguist Jean-François Champollion and the English freelance genius Thomas Young. Young had the first breakthrough, discovering that demotic script was actually a cursive version of hieroglyphics. However, like everyone else at the time, he thought both hieroglyphs and demotic characters were ideographs—that is, each symbol represented a concept, as with the components of Chinese characters, rather than representing only a sound, as with the Latin alphabet. A string of glyphs like “bird-snake-man-river” was assumed to mean something, but no one thought you could pronounce it like a sequence of letters.

Young believed some hieroglyphs were phonetic—specifically, those used to spell out the names of foreign rulers. Hieroglyphs representing kings and queens were often enclosed in an oblong border called a cartouche, making them easy to spot. The glyphs representing Egyptian rulers’ names were believed to be purely symbolic, not phonetic.

But since foreign names had no local equivalent, they could only be expressed phonetically, suggesting the glyph strings in those cartouches had to be pronounceable.

This proved to be the key to decoding. The Rosetta scripts encoded different languages.

But proper names would presumably be pronounced similarly regardless of language.

Young tried to assign phonetic values to the cartouche glyphs, but translated only six before giving up. The task fell to Champollion.

He made two breakthroughs. The first was comparing the demotic characters signifying Ptolemy on the Rosetta Stone to those representing Cleopatra in a separate example of demotic. He found characters corresponding to the Greek equivalents of P, L, T, O, and E in each name. In other words, demotic characters didn’t just symbolize concepts; they spelled out how words were pronounced. (As you may have guessed, in Greek, the P in Ptolemy isn’t silent.)

BY CECIL ADAMS

SLUG SIGNORINO

STRAIGHT DOPE Phoneme It In

Champollion’s next brainstorm was more of a leap. He identified the hieroglyphs corresponding to various demotic characters.

Then he took the hieroglyphs for Ptolemy on the Rosetta Stone and compared them to those on an obelisk, in a cartouche known to signify Cleopatra. He found the P, L, O and E hieroglyphs exactly where he predicted.

And the T? Champollion deduced he’d found a hieroglyphic homophone for this letter; that is, another symbol having the same pronunciation, as with our F and PH. Champollion set about finding other correspondences between Greek letters and hieroglyphs. In 1822, he found non-cartouche-enclosed hieroglyphs spelling out “Ra-mes-ses” (Ramses, the name used by numerous pharaohs). Champollion’s work wasn’t confirmed until 1866, when another multilingual text was discovered. But he’d figured it out.

The ancient Egyptians weren’t the only ones with a glyphic language—the ancient Mayans had one too. Early Spanish explorers attempted to record the Mayan calendar symbols in Spanish, producing a potentially Rosetta-like transliteration, but made a fatal error and got lost. Translation of Mayan glyphs made no real progress until 1952, when Russian linguist Yuri Knorosov pointed out the critical wrong turn in early attempts: The Spaniards assumed each Mayan glyph represented just one sound, whereas really each represented a syllable, or set of sounds.

The ingenuity of linguists in matching up sounds notwithstanding, without some Rosetta-type document or connection to a living language, translation of dead tongues is close to impossible. We have some idea what ancient Etruscan sounded like, because Greek and Etruscan letters tend to be used interchangeably in surviving Etruscan writing samples. But for the most part, no one knows what the writing says.

So that’s how we know how to pronounce ancient Egyptian names. An ancient Egyptian might not know what you were talking about if you chronoported back to Thebes in the second century B.C. and asked to see Tutankhamen, though. As any American who’s earned Parisian scorn trying to communicate with just a French-English dictionary knows, the Latin alphabet gives only a rough idea of pronunciation. One wonders how, without a surviving recording, someone in the future will phonetically translate North Dakotan, Cajun or Valley Girl versions of English.

Send questions to Cecil via StraightDope. com or write him c/o Chicago Reader, 350 N. Orleans, Chicago 60654.

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JULY 30, 2015 | 11

Billboard Bonanza

A Utah company bankrolls everyone’s mayoral dreams—except Becker’s.

BY COLBY FRAZIER cfrazier@cityweekly.net @colbyfrazierlp

W

ith a political system engineered to kneel at the altar of cash, Reagan Outdoor Advertising—Utah’s largest owner of billboards—has pushed its political agenda by slinging currency at hundreds of political candidates at all levels of government.

Since 2008, Reagan has given $548,000 in campaign contributions to fleets of Republicans and Democrats alike. During this same time, many laws pertaining to the outdoor-advertising industry have been tailored in a manner that many consider favorable to the industry.

But in the aftermath of the 2010 Citizens United ruling, in which the U.S. Supreme Court decided that corporations should be afforded the same First Amendment rights to free speech as people, Reagan has shifted into a new realm of political kingmaking by forming a Super Political Action Committee (PAC), Utahns for Independent Government.

During the past week, billboards have begun popping up across Salt Lake City promoting the mayoral campaigns of Jackie Biskupski, Luke Garrott, George Chapman and Dave Robinson—everyone running for Salt Lake City mayor except incumbent Ralph Becker, who is seeking a third term in office.

Using a PAC to support Salt Lake City municipal candidates allows donors to circumvent some campaign-finance laws and is unprecedented in local politics, says Matthew Burbank, an associate professor of political science at the University of Utah.

“What’s interesting is that this is the first time that I’m aware of that we’ve seen this type of independent expenditure,” Burbank says. “This is a case where they’re not giving money to the campaign; they’re spending it independently.”

Garrott—who has asked Reagan to take down his billboards—and Becker both say the involvement of a PAC in the city’s election is troubling on several fronts. Chief among them, they say, is the apparent ability of the organization to skirt a city ordinance that caps campaign contributions from individuals and corporations at $7,500.

POLITICS

Evidence that this campaign contribution limit is being exceeded is clear in the campaigns of Biskupski and Garrott, both of whom received in-kind contributions—at or near this $7,500 limit. Yet, each is now plastered on billboards, the value for which would undoubtedly put both candidates over the city’s donation cap.

“While there is a provision for PACs in the city campaign system, as far as I know, they have never been used, and we certainly haven’t seen a PAC like this set up that just so clearly circumvents and evades the intention of our city campaign-finance system,” Becker says.

In its vast history of contributing to campaigns, one mouth has remained conspicuously absent from the Reagan feeding trough: that of Ralph Becker.

Since his time on the Salt Lake Planning Commission in the 1980s, Becker has spearheaded efforts to beat back the pervasive presence of billboards— and the companies behind them—in the city. Decades ago, Becker remembers drawing the ire of Reagan when he helped see to it that the city passed an ordinance to make it more difficult for new billboards to pop up in the city, and easier to prevent them from reappearing once they were removed.

And during his 11 years in the Legislature, Becker says he was flummoxed as he watched his colleagues pass law after law that further protected Reagan and the billboard industry. “It is the most protectionist piece of legislation for an individual business, or this type of business, of anything I’m aware of in Utah law,” Becker says of state laws involving the outdoor-advertising industry.

Becker may be one of the only longserving politicians in the nation to eschew billboards altogether. He doesn’t hide his distaste for billboards, but also recognizes them as a “legitimate” form of advertising.

“Make no mistake about it: I think they degrade, they serve as visual pollution in a city like ours with beautiful scenery, and they mar the landscape,” Becker says, noting that he has never used a billboard in any of his campaigns.

Talk like this has prompted Reagan to put its muscle behind not just one, but all of the other mayoral candidates.

Nate Sechrest, general counsel for Reagan and secretary of the company’s PAC, says that the PAC and its many supporters—who will be publicly known in August when the entity discloses who bankrolled the effort—believe Salt Lake City needs a new mayor.

Sechrest conceded this is Reagan’s first foray into the world of unfettered campaign support

by a PAC, and that the business climate in Salt Lake City warranted it. “The answer is simply that the administration’s been so aggressively bad for business in Salt Lake City,” Sechrest says. “We actually, and quite a few like-minded organizations, have decided that enough is enough, and we need to see some change down at city hall.”

That politicians fund their campaigns with money is no surprise, and Becker is hardly new to the game. Using money as a marker of success in a political campaign, Becker is beating the snot out of his opponents. So far, he’s raised $419,495 to Biskupski’s $219,824. Meanwhile, Garrott has brought in $17,906.

And Becker does not shy away from corporate donors. Cowboy Partners LC, a local development firm with projects sprouting across the city, contributed $5,000. Another construction outfit, Northstar Builders, also has given $5,000, while Becker has received $5,000 from HDR Inc., a construction, architecture and engineering firm in Omaha, Neb.; and $3,000 from Simon & Company, a Washington, D.C., firm that lobbies on behalf of local governments.

On the reality that successful political campaigns require money, Becker says that when he began seeking political office decades ago, he told himself he’d have to live with it. Nevertheless, he says the role of corporations and the amounts they should be allowed to contribute is worth discussing, and potentially even changing.

Although he believes Salt Lake City’s $7,500 cap serves to silence the outsize influence that individual or corporate donors can have, he would consider lowering it.

“For better or worse, it costs a lot of money to run an effective campaign,” Becker says. “I believe in playing by the rules and playing by the intention of the rules and being open and transparent about it, disclosing where our contributions come from and what they’re used for and letting the public make decisions.”

Garrott, the current Salt Lake City Council chair, has had his eye on limiting campaign contributions from Day 1 of his mayoral run. He placed a $1,000 limit on the contributions he received, and says that, this summer, the council will consider dropping the city’s $7,500 cap even further.

His interest in limiting money’s influence in politics made it all the more insulting when he discovered billboards had been erected

showcasing his broad smile with the words: “Luke Garrott Salt Lake City Mayor.”

But even Garrott plays ball with Reagan. He received $7,500 of in-kind contributions—free billboard space— from the company. However, Garrott says he made it clear to Reagan that he didn’t want any assistance above and beyond the city’s contribution cap.

“The people have set, through the city code, those limits that I’m trying very hard to respect,” Garrott says.

“You can’t help but ironically laugh at the Reagan billboard PAC not caring.”

While Garrott has demanded that the billboard signage erected in his honor be removed, and Becker has called on Biskupski to do the same, Biskupski seems OK to ride out the storm with her face splashed, without her consent, across the city.

“If these billboards are causing people to pay attention to PACs and the rules that govern them, I think that is a good thing,” Biskupski said in a written statement. “Unlike municipal campaigns, neither the Legislature nor state PACs have any donation limits. I believe it makes sense to limit contributions to candidates and PACs—unfortunately, that rests in the hands of the Legislature, and the majority has not shown an appetite for making that change.”

As a PAC, Sechrest says Utahns for Independent Government doesn’t have to listen to any of the candidates. In fact, to ensure it doesn’t run afoul of election laws, the PAC cannot listen to the candidates.

That means that if Garrott wants his billboard taken down, he’ll have to take it down himself—though he fears Reagan could have him arrested for vandalism or trespassing.

“I’m not sure that we would be inclined to risk any kind of correlation between what he asks us to do and what we actually do,” Sechrest says of Garrott. “We’re not coordinating in any way, shape or f o r m .”

CW BRANDON BURT

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12 | JULY 30, 2015

NEWS

“I think they degrade, they serve as visual pollution in a city like ours with beautiful scenery, and they mar the landscape.”

—Salt Lake City Mayor Ralph Becker

NEWS No Parking

For Salt Lake City visitors, parking hassles are a major complaint—but it may be the new normal.

BY ERIC S. PETERSON epeterson@cityweekly.net @ericspeterson

T

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JULY 30, 2015 | 13

The Downtown Alliance recently celebrated the city’s booming residential retail success, citing 1,800 new units completed downtown and an overall vacancy rate at 3 percent. This upward housing trend is similar to those in other urban cores across the country—but in Salt Lake City, Mathis says, this trend was buoyed by a downtown experience, largely shaped in recent years by the City Creek Center effect.

The Downtown Alliance once heralded the mall for helping bring shoppers to surrounding businesses, but Mathis now says that, in reality, not many small businesses felt much of an effect from the mall.

Still, he says, City Creek provided a shot in the arm for downtown amenities and projects.

“It’s not like people are coming to City Creek and saying, ‘Oh, I’m going to Macy’s,’ and then walking two blocks someplace else,” Mathis says. “But it’s true that City Creek led to the biggest convention year we’ve ever had. It led to the 222 [office building] being built, which will inject 8,000 new downtown employees. It led to office lease rates at all-time highs, vacancy rates at all-time lows and a spate of new residences being built.”

For Mathis, however, parking remains an issue, and will continue to. As for promoting downtown, the alliance does coordinate with the city, but he says that, rather than fight for cheaper or more parking, the nonprofit will instead seek to educate the public about parking. Mathis dislikes seeing so many surface parking lots in the city, when they could be developed for better uses, he says.

For Downtown Alliance spokesman Nick Como, parking in any major city is always an issue. Como believes that, in some ways, Salt Lake City is just experiencing growing pains when it comes to dealing with inconvenient parking.

“A lot of people compare Salt Lake City [today] to Salt Lake City in 1980, rather than Salt Lake City to somewhere comparable like Portland or Chicago,” Como says.

Reid Ewing, a professor and incoming chair of City and Metropolitan Planning at the University of Utah, agrees that Salt Lakers may struggle more as they adjust to less convenient parking. Ewing authored a 2014 study that surveyed residential preferences of individuals in the Salt Lake City region. While the study found most in favor of smart growth, it also found that “convenient parking” was the first concern for those surveyed about choosing a place to live.

“We seem to be more conservative and auto-oriented than national surveys suggest that the national public is becoming,” Ewing says. Still, he agrees there should be fewer surface lots downtown. “That’s just part of the process of urbanization.” CW

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he Downtown Alliance, a nonprofit contracted by Salt Lake City to collect a property assessment to promote the core of the city, recently released the results of its marketing survey.

That report polled 605 residents from across the state about their forays into Salt Lake City: What brings them back, what keeps them away and would they consider living in the ever-rising downtown?

Two questions in particular seemed to divide visitors from those who would like to make downtown home. When survey respondents were asked to identify one thing that would make them want to visit downtown more often, 25 percent said “improved parking.” Among those who said they would consider living downtown, 36 percent said they would because of downtown’s “convenience, close proximity and access to everything.”

Convenience vs. parking may represent the central conflict when downtown convenience means perhaps a city core that is more walkable and bikeable, yet conversely less parkable. It’s a conflict that Downtown Alliance Executive Director Jason Mathis is aware of, but not troubled by. He argues that a lack of parking is, in many ways, a sign of a vibrant downtown, and that a good downtown is an experience people are willing to pay for when it comes to parking.

“Nobody comes downtown to park, they come downtown for entertainment, shopping and culture,” Mathis says. “The goal of a downtown is to be compelling enough that people are willing to pay a little bit more than if they were to pull up to some free parking at a Bed, Bath & Beyond.”

But for those in love with the convenience of downtown, the alliance’s survey dovetails with two key demographics: Millennials and empty-nesters. The ability to walk a block from an apartment and shop for groceries at Harmon’s, go to a bar or take Trax to a Jazz game, is especially appealing to both groups. According to the survey, the biggest groups that said they would live downtown were ages 18-24 (46 percent), 25-29 (33 percent) and then, near the other end of the age spectrum, those ages 55-64 (27 percent).

CITY LIFE

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14 | JULY 30, 2015

CITIZEN REVOLT

THE

OCHO

In a week, you can

CHANGE THE WORLD

THE LIST OF EIGHT

BY BILL FROST

@bill_frost

ELECTION

Salt Lake City Municipal Primary Election The Aug. 11 primary is a “Vote by Mail” election, with only a few polling centers open on Election Day. Visit SLCgov.com/elections for information.

OUTDOORS & MORE

Eight other Sen. Mike Lee failures besides defunding Planned Parenthood and repealing Obamacare:

8. Grandstanding 101.

7. Stopping gay marriage, thus hastening the end of straight marriage.

6. Preventing the ultimate

demise of Christianity— it’s all on him (see No. 7).

5. Reclaiming hairline.

4. Choosing the wrong

side in the tense, 48-hour Taylor Swift/Nicki Minaj conflict (always back T-Swift).

6 AnnuAl beehive brew-off 2015 August 8th-9th th

entries deadline: sunday august 2nd at 5 pm Beers judged august 8tH & 9tH party at tHe Bayou august 9tH @ 5:30 pm

$5 per entry

Each entry of (3) 12oz. brown bottles bjcp style guidelines More info at beernut.com/beercomp

3. Escaping dark past as Bob’s Big Boy.

1. Senatoring (2010-present).

RELATIONSHIPS

Intimacy & Soul Mates John Gray, author of Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus, presents a seminar for singles and couples, dealing with how to find everything you want in a loving relationship. University of Utah, Film & Media Arts Auditorium, 370 S. 1530 East, 801-674-7162, Aug. 1, 9 a.m.-1 p.m., $25-$100, RisingPathways.com Single Mom Storytelling Night An evening of storytelling for single/divorced moms. Share a story of your own and connect with a roomful of strong womenfolk. Sugar Space, 132 S. 800 West, July 31, 7:00 p.m. UNOMUM.com

LGBT

Caravan of GLAM LGBTQ touring production is hosted by Ms. Ecstacy Inferno and Ms. Jackie Ohh, and features Isaiah Esquire, Jayla Rose and Johnny Nuriel. A portion of the proceeds go to the Provo Pride Fund. City Limits Tavern, 440 W. Center St., Provo, Aug. 1, doors open at 9 p.m.; show starts at 10 p.m.; $12 in advance, $15 at the door. CaravanofGlam.com

GOOD WORKS

2. Earning evites

to any of Orrin Hatch’s virgin-blood-draining parties.

Book Cliffs Climate Justice Action Camp Gather in Salt Lake City on Aug. 1 for a benefit concert for Justice for Corey Kanosh.

On Aug. 2, travel to Swasey’s Beach on the banks of the Green River for workshops, presentations and plans to protect wild lands from the expansion of the first U.S. commercial tar-sands mine. Donate at IGG.me/at/ BookCliffsSummer2015/x. Camp runs Aug. 1-10.

PeacefulUprising.org/2015actioncamp Citizens Climate Lobby Monthly Meeting Learn to lobby for federal legislation to reduce greenhouse-gas emissions and encourage legislators to support carbon-fee-anddividend legislation. Intermountain Medical Center, 5121 Cottonwood St., Conference Room 3, Doty Education Center (Building 6), Murray, Aug. 1, 10:15 a.m.-12:15 p.m.

Facebook.com/CitizensClimateLobbyUtah Haunted Ranch Meet at Fielding Garr Ranch first for a presentation, then wander through buildings looking for evidence of visitors from beyond the grave. Bring flashlights. Space is limited. Contact Clay at clayshelley@utah.gov to reserve your spot or more information. Antelope Island State Park, July 31, 9:30 p.m.

Beer & Wine Brewing supplies

1200 s state st.

801-531-8182 / beernut.com www.facebook.com/thebeernut

Hours: Sun 10-5pm | M-Sat 10am-6:30pm

A Night For Nepal Help raise money for the Nepalese people as they struggle to rebuild from recent earthquakes that killed 9,000 people. Enjoy henna art, belly dancing and food on the Global Village patio. Global Village Gifts, 69 E. 100 North, Logan, July 31, 6-9 p.m.

GlobalVillageGifts.org Got a volunteer, activism or community event to submit?

Email editor@cityweekly.net

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16 | JULY 30, 2015

BY ROL AND SWEET After more than two decades of publication, this is the final time News Quirks will appear in City Weekly. Roland S. Sweet died July 24, 2015, of heart failure in Mount Vernon, Va. Sweet was 69 years old. City Weekly extends its sincere condolences to the Sweet family.

Anchors Away Canada’s National Defence decided to decommission a 45-year-old navy supply ship without a replacement because mechanics in Halifax were spending a “disproportionate amount of time” keeping the vessel operating, according to official documents, by trying to locate spare parts, “some of which have been procured via eBay.” The original manufacturers long ago stopped making the parts; some were reportedly “beyond acceptable limits” because corrosion was compromising structural integrity. The vessel, HCMS Preserver, had been scheduled for decommissioning but was kept afloat after the government canceled funding for its replacement in 2008. Building a new one will take at least eight years. (The Canadian Press) Sign of the Times Utah Valley University has designated a lane for texting on the stairs of its Student Life & Wellness Center. Two other dedicated lanes, distinguished by neon-green stripes, are for walkers and runners. Amy Grubbs, the school’s director for campus recreation, acknowledged that not every texter sticks to the lane, noting some “don’t even see it because they’re so consumed in their phones.” (ABC News) Matchmakery Iran has launched a state-supported matchmaking website.

Deputy Minister of Youth Affairs and Sports Mahmoud Golzari cautioned that “Find Your Equal” is not a dating site. Its goal is to produce 100,000 new m-arriages in the coming year. “We have high demand for marriage and 11 million [young single adults] who are increasing every day,” Golzari said. Marriages are necessary to overcome Iran’s declining birthrate, according to the government, which last year banned vasectomies and permanent birth control measures in women. Officials, including supreme leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, have publicly urged couples to have more babies to repudiate “undesirable aspects of Western lifestyles.” (The Washington Post) Short Fuses Haden Smith, 18, demanded that his mother intervene to mend his relationship with his girlfriend and threatened to kill her chickens if she didn’t. Deputies in Limestone County, Ala., said Smith vowed he’d kill a chicken every 15 minutes and gave her a deadline of noon. When the deadline passed, he started sending her picture messages of each dead chicken. He got to six before deputies arrived and arrested him. (Tribune Media Wire)

Utah GET OUT | GET GOING | JUST GO

A magazine about adventure isn’t just about going places.

It’s about the people and companies who help us get out there.

n Tired of waiting at a hospital’s emergency room in Morganton, N.C., Katlyn Milligan, 20, set off the sprinklers, resulting in “copious amounts of water” pouring down, according to the police report. Milligan, who was waiting for a relative to be treated, said that after two hours, she couldn’t wait any longer, so she went into a bathroom and held her lighter to the sprinkler. Cleanup delayed ER operations another two hours “at the busiest time of the day,” Nursing Administrator David Everhart said. Milligan herself had to be taken to the ER to check for effects from exposure to the sprinkler’s stagnant water. After she was released, police arrested her. (New York Daily News)

Homeland Insecurity White supremacists and anti-government radicals have killed more people in the United States since Sept. 11, 2001, than Muslim jihadists have, according to Washington research center New America. The score: 48 to 26. New America program associate David Sterman warned that white supremacy and anti-government idealism constitute an “ignored threat” because the government has focused its surveillance and datacollection efforts instead on domestic Islamic extremists. (The Washington Times)  Besides not recognizing 67 out of 70 test violations of airport security checkpoints during a recent exercise, the Transportation Security Administration failed to identify 73 airport workers potentially associated with terrorism.

Former acting TSA administrator Melvin Carraway denied the Department of Homeland Security’s finding that the TSA missed potential threats, insisting, “The term ‘missed’ is inaccurate, in that it implies a fault with the TSA vetting system or manual review process, which is not the case.” (USA Today)

The Classic Snake River Whitewater!

May 16th - Sept. 27th Schedule a time now!

10:00am - 12:00pm or 2:15pm

M-Sat 8-7 Sun 10-5 • 9275 S 1300 W 801-562-5496 • glovernursery.com/city

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RIVER OF NO RETURN a trip down Idaho’s wild and protected rivers shows the wisdom in saving something.

“W

ilderness” is a word Utahns hear in the context of dispute.

It is a word that many of the state’s leaders revile, while outdoorsmen and -women, conservationists and environmentalists, love. There are many places, though—in Utah and outside of Utah—where blocks of wilderness have been set aside for the solitude and the sanity of all humans.

One such place, and the focus of this story, is a massive blank spot on the map in central Idaho known as the Frank Church River of No Return Wilderness.

Here, hundreds of miles of wild rivers, undammed and untamed by man, flow through vast gorges—one deeper than the Grand Canyon—and split rugged, pine-carpeted mountain ranges. Here—if only for a short while—a man, woman or child can feel closer to that uncategorized feeling—nature, freedom, solitude—that, acre by acre and inch by inch, is so easily destroyed by the blade of a bulldozer, the bit on a drilling rig, the imagination of a city builder and the dammed waters—the goddamned waters—of rivers constipated by concrete wedges.

This wilderness contains two rivers of particular interest, the Middle Fork of the Salmon and the Main Salmon, which the author floated in May and in July 2015, respectively, linking up a 184-mile stretch of water that, apart from the occasional airstrip and fishing cabin, are about as far from civilization as is possible in the Lower 48.

Why does a spot of rugged Idaho wilderness matter to Utahns? As it turns out, Utahns make up a hefty portion each year of the river-runners who attempt to navigate these waters. And as Utah lawmakers continue their multimillion-dollar fight to wrest around 30 million acres of public lands from the federal government, the River of No Return wilderness serves as a shining example of how the longsighted wisdom to set something aside, to save something for everyone, has a value that dollars cannot buy.

The wild places of America grow scarcer each day, and as the Beehive State grapples with the impact of a population that planners and politicians insist will double in the next 35 years, wilderness—or what remains of it, anyway—will forever be under assault by the march of human progress. This is true in Idaho, in Utah, and anywhere else where pine trees sway, rivers run free and oil, coal and other natural-

resource deposits sit locked beneath the dirt.

Cort Conley, an Idaho historian, author and boatman who has written guide books about the Main and Middle Fork, says that over the past century, nine dams have been proposed on the Main (the longest undammed river in the nation) and roads have been drawn up to run alongside the rivers.

Through a combination of luck, good timing and farsightedness, none of these plans has been realized.

“They represent a legacy of a pretty intact ecosystem,” Conley says of the rivers. “I really believe that it’s such a special place and will only become more so with time.”

Conley, though, has witnessed his fair share of losing conservation battles along the rivers, and he reckons that, just like wild places in Utah, Idaho will remain under assault by miners and developers long into the future.

“There’s always going to be people who would sell Yellowstone for steam power if they saw a buck in it,” he says. “There’s always going to be private or corporate avarice seeking to sell resources for private or corporate gain.”

So, in honor of the wild places that do exist, draw some lines on a map and walk, row or crawl out to some distant, vacant space you’ve never been before. Take a little water, pack a lot of beer, and have some fun.

Bear Hunter’s Delight

“I’ll hunt you,” the man said, no sarcasm detectable in his tone, not a wrinkle of BS on his face. “Give you a 30-minute head start, no binos, and you can wear camo.”

“Binos” are binoculars. It was supposed to be a relaxing night of drinking beer and chilling out in the steaming water of the Loon Creek hot spring, an outpost accessible only by trail, raft or airplane in the heart of the Frank Church River of No Return Wilderness, when we stumbled upon the hunters.

We were outnumbered and badly outmuscled.

Most of the hunters were barrel-chested men with forests of black chest hair. Holding numerous bearand wolf-killing permits, they were armed with highpowered rifles. An unknown number of them were Mormons. All were Idahoans; two were women; one clutched a Busch Light.

We were eight river-rats from the city. Two women,

BY COLBY FRAZIER  cFrazier@cityweekly.net six men. Four on a pair of rafts and four kayakers.

We had no guns but were rich in beer, since several in our party had failed to consume their eight- to 12-beer-per-day allotment.

The hunters were happy. They explained how, earlier that day, from 300 yards away and on the opposite side of the river, they had killed a 6-foot-tall male black bear. Discarding the bulk of the animal, the hunters took the fur and the skull (“looks a lot like a human,” one of the men said) as souvenirs.

And the hunters were not finished. They held three additional permits for bear and four for wolves.

One described the time he had heard a wolf howl.

“It was blood-curtlin’,” he said.

Several beers into my daily allotment, I was inspired to ask a series of questions: Q: Will you use the fur for a coat?

A: No, a rug.

Q: How many times did you shoot the bear?

A: Three times: At least once in the head, because a bullet was found lodged in the bear’s skull.

Q: Does bear meat taste good?

A: Yes. Q: How many permits for bear are issued in Idaho?

A: Thousands per year.

Q: Where did you get your permit?

A: At a gas station in Salmon.

Q: How much did you pay for it?

A: $10.

Then I confided to the hunters a morbid thought: “I wouldn’t mind being killed by a bear, lion or wolf.

Better way to go than a car crash.”

At this comment, the conversation went quiet, and the man sitting closest to me said he didn’t have much say over what a bear does. But he’d be happy to hunt me.

After three full days into a spring trip down the Middle Fork of the Salmon River, a man offering to kill me in the forest didn’t seem like a huge deal. When you’re on the Middle Fork, the river, the forest and the people you are with, and the rare few you come across, are all that matter. There is no connection to wherever home is, no lines to communication to bosses and loved ones. You are free to float in peace, and attempt, if only for a few days, to concentrate on little more than the moment. And, under the oddest of circumstances, you might even get to imagine yourself decked out in camouflage, sprinting up a mountain, a bino-less bear hunter hot on your heels.

Salmon River

•Lewiston

Carey Creek

(Main Salmon take-out)

South Fork Salmon River

Corn Creek

(Main Salmon put-in)

Upper Selway River

Cache Bar

(Middle Fork take-out)

•

McCall

Big Creek

•

•

Boise

Idaho Falls

•

Twin Falls

A Rare Year for a Rare River

Middle Fork Salmon River

The River Permit King

Loon Creek Boundary Creek

(Middle Fork put in)

JULY 30, 2015 | 19

and RPK managed to switch it out for a launch on May 28, because that date worked better for the crew); and the Main Salmon River. This last trip, down the Main, was a last-minute pick-up that the RPK obtained when he realized the water level in Montana would not float his boat.

And this final permit is, perhaps, the most impressive. July is prime-time lottery season for the Main Salmon.

According to U.S. Forest Service statistics, 534 people applied for a permit for July 8. Four people were awarded a permit. One cancelled two weeks before the launch, and the RPK put his hooks into it. While this permit filled RPK’s immediate needs, it also afforded several of us who floated the Middle Fork in May the opportunity to continue down an 80mile stretch of the river, seeing both the Middle Fork and the Main in the same season.

Although it’s unusual to pick up a cancellation permit during prime season, it’s much easier to do so on the “shoulder” seasons. In late May and early June, the Middle Fork typically gushes at a wild rate, making it unappealing and, at times, downright unsafe to run. But this is exactly when RPK likes to run the Middle Fork, and snagging early-season permits on

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you a three-year ban from the lottery process—permit holders can cancel their permits a month ahead of time, freeing up the permit for someone else.

The primary problem with picking up cancellation permits is time. Even with months of preparation, spending a week in the wilderness far from grocery stores, hospitals and cell phones is a difficult task. And planning for one of these trips in a couple weeks or with only a month’s notice is even harder.

Another obstacle is that these rivers, especially at high flows in the early spring, are swollen freight trains that roar into vicious rapids that take some level of experience to navigate safely.

This narrows the field greatly.

But if one fails to draw a permit through the lottery, a cancellation can be obtained. And the RPK picks up rare river permits the way the late basketball star Wilt Chamberlain picked up groupies: prolifically.

So far in 2015—a year that left the RPK permit-less with the exception of the Smith River in Montana, which ran out of water before he could run it—the RPK has picked up cancellation permits on the Yampa River in Colorado, which is the last major free-flowing river in the Colorado River system; two permits on the Middle Fork (one was for May 24,

It’s tough to say exactly who crowned the River Permit King. What matters more is that it is among the truest nicknames ever bestowed upon a person.

The RPK’s luck is no better than the rest of us, and he never draws a permit through the lottery system.

To be clear, RPK, along with the rest of the river-running community, religiously pays modest fees (Four Rivers entries cost $6) to enter the lotteries every January.

Many groups of river runners in Utah throw large parties for their friends and families, at which everyone assists and colludes on dates, times and rivers that must be run. If one person wins at a riverpermit party, that person is expected to invite a hefty portion of the others who attended that party on the trip. Mutual invites are expected all around.

But when a group comes up dry—the norm for our group—what then? This is where the RPK shines. Some people who draw lottery permits aren’t able to show up on the date and time of their launch.

Rather than failing to show—which earns

Run-in with Bear Hunters

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on any of the Idaho rivers, a mix of determination, flexibility and an insatiable lust for rowing his yellow 15 1/2-foot raft has delivered him down the Middle Fork for the past seven consecutive years.

Of course, the River Permit King, whose real name is Steve, needs companionship on the river. That’s where I and several other river runners come in. If the river is our church, then RPK is our prophet, and we follow him around wherever it is he wants us to go.

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Utah has its fair share of rivers—big, silty, beautiful ones like the Colorado and Green rivers. But, compared to Idaho, the Beehive State lags in a very enticing category: wild and scenic waterways.

Of Utah’s 81,899 river miles, only 169.3 miles of the Virgin River and its tributaries are protected under the federal Wild and Scenic Rivers Act, according to government statistics.

Idaho, on the other hand, has 107,651 river miles, 891 of which are protected under the act.

And a significant portion of Idaho’s wild rivers can be ticked off and seen first-hand by river runners ambitious enough to link up the Middle Fork’s 104 miles with the main branch of the Salmon River’s permitted 80 miles.

But obtaining a permit to run either one of these rivers requires some luck in Idaho’s Four Rivers Lottery, which, in 2015, received 23,993 applications. (The other two rivers in the Four Rivers Lottery are Hell’s Canyon on the Snake, and the Selway River.)

These nearly 24,000 souls competed to win a total of 1,095 permits on these four rivers. On the Middle Fork, 387 permits were issued, while the Main saw 310 permits awarded.

Utahns account for a good share of those wishing to run these rivers. On the Middle Fork, 892 Utahns applied and 33 won, accounting for the fifth-largest share of applications in the country. On the Main Salmon, 704 Utahns applied, with 23 walking away with permits.

While it’s not impossible to draw a permit through the lottery, I have known only two people lucky enough to win a permit for the Middle Fork. And for ambitious river runners, waiting until next year isn’t really an option.

This is where my pal, the River Permit King, comes in handy. Though he has never personally won a permit

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A 5-day beer supply for three people

this pristine artery that hosts around 300 rapids hasn’t proven particularly difficult for RPK. It is the tenacity of RPK that allowed us this summer to link up—not consecutively—the Middle Fork and the Main Salmon rivers.

Beer

Once plans for a river trip are set in stone, all kinds of tasks await. You have to get your gear together: at least one stove, tables, chairs, tents, warm clothes, cool clothes, rafts, oars, kayaks, ropes, first-aid kits, cooking supplies—basically everything you’d take car camping.

Two significant necessities must be calculated, tabulated and accounted for: food and drink. Our crew prefers to take care of the first by divvying out meals among various members. For example, I took on a single day’s meal: breakfast, lunch, dinner and cocktail.

Cooking on the river is a good time, but the RPK and his followers tend to rise around 9 a.m., eat at 10 a.m. and, somehow, consistently fail to make it onto the water by noon. This makes for long days on the water. And if you get to camp as the sun is setting, cooking a meal from scratch in darkness is a hassle.

The night before a river trip, I spend the evening cooking. Biscuits and gravy for breakfast, a hummus-and-vegetable wrap for lunch and tamales (from Victor’s Tires) for dinner.

Once all of the gear is packed on the trailer and miles start to fly, the debate on beer begins. If Idaho is the destination, then buying a bunch of beer in Idaho is a good way to go.

The crew on the Main Salmon

Tommy the Hammer paying for his Loon Creek swim with a Chaco-shot of whiskey

When you’re on the Middle Fork, the river, the forest and the people you are with, and the rare few you come across, are all that matter.

But how much beer does one person need for a river trip? This question is debated furiously in the river-running world. For a newcomer, it is easy to underestimate the volume of barley water needed to get down a river. A key factor is the mode with which one is floating.

For kayakers, it is a proven fact there there is less time to drink beer—and less carrying capacity—than those who ride on rafts. A safe beer budget for a kayaker, then, is eight to 10 beers per day. A beer-loving rafter, on the other hand, should probably budget at least 12 beers per day. Sometimes you drink more, sometimes less. And whether or not you drink all of these beers is not the point. The most important thing to consider when you’re in some neonlighted grocery store for the last time for a week is to buy enough beer. “Enough” beer is the amount it takes to feel calm and confident that you won’t run out as the river days drift by—a fearful reality that haunts the dreams of anyone who has ever rationed too modestly and looked on as their friends gluttonously imbibed.

Bishop Jesse preaching

How a Shaman Stays in the Good Graces by Taking Care of Poop

Most multiple-day river trips—in Idaho and Utah—require special equipment to ensure that campers follow the “leave no trace” wilderness etiquette.

Leave no trace means exactly that. And river runners usually abide. It is the norm along the Middle Fork and Main Salmon rivers to arrive at a pristine campsite and, aside from the occasional footprint in the sand, fail to find any sign of human life.

A few key precautions must be taken to ensure that no signs of the nightly party around the campfire are left for future visitors. For a fire pit, a fire pan, elevated off of the soil with a fireresistant fire blanket placed beneath, is used. All trash, including ashes from the fire, is gathered and hauled out. Dishwater is strained above the high-water mark so that solids can be thrown in the trash, which is collected and carried on a raft for the duration of the trip. Rangers politely ask that river runners pee in the river, so as to prevent campsites from reeking like a kitty-litter box. And then there is poop.

We humans poop, preferably, every day—or even twice or three times a day. And, for whatever reason, many humans believe that they have the right to put poop wherever they wish.

The common myth holds that digging a hole a few inches deep, filling the hole with feces, burning the toilet paper and covering up the hole suffices as good wilderness behavior.

Lake Powell is a good example why this is not true and how human waste can ruin a person’s day. In the mid1990s, when boaters were busy pooping in the sand all across the big bathtub,

The River Permit King (RPK), in his element, on the Middle Fork.

Tommy the Hammer at rest

many beaches had to be closed due to E. coli—a bacteria indicative of the presence of human waste.

Each year, roughly 10,000 people float down the Middle Fork and Main Salmon rivers, and if every one of them took a dump in the weeds—well, it would cause some problems.

On the river, the matter of poop is taken care of by a “groover.” Nothing special, the groover is a toilet seat set atop a military-surplus ammunition can with a special liner. So named for the days before rafters discovered they could place a toilet seat atop the ammo can and instead sat on the edges of the box, leaving grooves on their hindquarters— the groover is an effective, and enjoyable, way to crap in the woods.

No view is finer than the view from a groover. Placed at the right perch down among some boulders, the river coursing past just feet away, or up in the trees along a creek, it makes for the finest bathroom experience around. Of course, a groove session can be soured by mosquitoes or some other beasts, but typically, after several days of grooving with a view, returning to a conventional toilet at home is a disappointment.

Because the rafters lug the kayakers’ beer and gear down the river, kayakers often find themselves in charge of the groover. Kayakers carry the poop box and assorted toilet paper and toilet-seat box to and from the boats. Kayakers also get to set the groover up wherever we want, and so must become experts of views and surveyors of flat ground.

When a groover begins to fill, it is the responsibility of the kayaker to initiate a

poop-compacting method that involved picking the groove box up and dropping it on the ground.

The groover box or boxes remain in their various states of use throughout the trip and can be emptied at an RV park, or anywhere else where people go “camping” with satellite television, generators and 1,000-square feet of airconditioned space on wheels.

Our pal Charles the Shaman, who describes himself as “kayaking swine,” is a groover enthusiast. He loves to set up the groover in plain sight of the river and he enjoys being spotted there in the late morning as more punctual parties pass by on the water.

Charles sees it like this, and explained it thusly to my 8-year-old daughter on the Main Salmon trip: “Setting up the groover is a way to get the most respect for the least amount of work.” Words to live by.

So goes the wisdom of Charles the Shaman, who no one begrudges for failing to help carry stoves, tables and coolers to and from the kitchen area, because he can be counted on for taking care of the poop.

How Tommy the Hammer Almost Died, and How His Boat Got Dented

Charles the Shaman, surfing a wave on the Middle Fork

“Whose River Is This?”

Boundary Creek boat ramp, Middle Fork

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The confluence of the Middle Fork, right, and the Main Salmon

JULY 30, 2015 | 21

Twilight on the Main Salmon

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On the river, there are moments of great clarity and joy interspersed with dashes of fear. Fear of a rapid, or fear of what might be taking place at home—and fear of bear hunters. But what shines through is the freedom of a river trip. The freedom of being able to scream out about anything; the freedom of a set number of tasks woven into the routine of eating, drinking, pitching tents and breaking them down and sleeping and waking and grooving.

But perhaps the greatest freedom wilderness affords is the freedom of the unknown. The thing that haunts my days and stimulates my mind as much as any other is the knowledge that there are places I can go where I am not king; where, with a stroke or two of bad luck and poor planning, I could freeze to death, drown or be crushed by a falling tree. Best of all, I think, is that there are creatures— blood-curtlin’ ones—that could turn me into their evening snack with a slash or two of a paw.

River-running season is still in full swing, and the lure to escape the city, work, crowds and civilization altogether is as strong as it was in the doldrums of winter. Even though I’m 184-rivermiles richer than I was in April, I’m already mapping out next year’s trips: how many beers I’ll budget per day, which river permits I’ll apply for, how many days I can convince the boss to let me take off from work.

The beauty of protected public lands is that whether they’re in Idaho, Utah, New York or California, they belong to us all. This was the message from a silverhaired ranger at the Main Salmon, who after warning us about bears and poison ivy and explaining that we must pee in the river, asked us a simple question: “Whose river is this?”

Someone answered correctly: “It is all of ours.”

“That’s right,” the ranger said. “Enjoy your river and take care of it.” CW

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At the put-in at Boundary Creek, not far from Stanley, Idaho, the Middle Fork originates in an alpine forest thick with ponderosa pine trees.

From the boat ramp—a wooden structure (that could be a ski jump) drops from the ranger station straight down to the river—the river is swift, shedding 40 feet of elevation per mile. The Middle Fork also immediately begins to grow, picking up side streams that make it swell in size.

Unlike a float on a dammed river, the Middle Fork offers a clear picture of what a river system looks like. Over the course of its 104 miles, numerous creeks, some the size of small rivers, tumble through canyons and add to the flow. By the end of the trip, after descending some 3,000 feet in elevation, the Middle Fork morphs from an alpine stream into a flowing monster, complete with the customary massive boils, waves, and eddy lines that big water tends to breed.

One of the Middle Fork’s larger creeks is called Loon. On this trip, we managed to secure the campsite where the aquamarine waters of Loon Creek tumble into the Middle Fork. Any kayaker who’s ever walked the mile and a half up Loon Creek to the hot spring located there has looked down on the creek with lustfilled eyes, saying quite bravely, and perhaps even drunkenly, “I’ll run that next time.”

Charles the Shaman has said this so many times that, this time, he decided to make it so. After arriving at Loon Creek late in the afternoon, the four kayakers, Charles, Tommy, Robin and myself, dragged our boats up the trail. Along the way, we did our best to scout the creek, which didn’t appear terribly technical but had its fair share of grabby rapids. Near the top, a downed log stretched three quarters of the distance across the creek. The approach to the log consisted of a pair of medium-sized rapids, which would have to be navigated smoothly. The log could certainly hurt, and possibly even kill, a boater.

We crammed into our kayaks and set off down the short stretch. Within minutes, trouble came our way. Tommy found himself pinned against a large rock just above the log. Before I could make it to him,

he had bailed out of his boat and was swimming. I heard screaming from the shore. The RPK, who had hiked up to watch, yelled down at Tommy to let go of his boat and swim away from the log. I paddled hard, keeping one eye on Tommy and another on the moves that needed to be made.

As Tommy backstroked to safety, his boat went beneath the log. It let out a hollow thumping as the water pounded it against the log. When it finally flushed free, the boat sped downstream. Full of water, the boat was difficult to pull through the rocky creek. About 100 yards below the strainer, it became submerged and pinned on a rock about 10 feet from shore.

Ty ing some quick knots and rounding up some carabiners, we managed to tug the boat, which had sustained a softball-size dent, to safety.

It was a harrowing end to the day. Tommy the Hammer isn’t easily flappable and wasn’t flapped.

Charles the Shaman got what he wanted and, at long last, floated Loon Creek.

After dinner, we walked back up to the hot springs to retrieve Tommy’s boat and do some soaking, mostly in peace.

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FRIDAY 7.31

Park City Kimball Arts Festival For the 46th year, during the first weekend in August, the heart of downtown Park City transforms into a showcase for the arts. Sometimes as the hottest weekend of the year, this antipode of the ski season makes use of the awe-inspiring mountain locale to host booths by more than 100 practitioners of almost every artistic medium— including ceramics, drawing, fiber arts, glass, jewelry, metal art, mixed media, painting, photography, printmaking, sculpture and woodworking— from all over the country. Food and local-music offerings also abound.

Arts festival fare is often stereotyped as overly commercial, but some of the more innovative works at the festival are the sculptures of C.J. Rench of Hood River, Ore., and Jeffrey Zachmann of Fergus Falls, Minn., as well as the prints of Marina Terauds of North Branch, Mich. Zachmann’s work utilizes a futuristic design aesthetic, and Terauds’ prints incorporate a Seussian sense of cartoon whimsy to create something fresh.

The event has been lauded as one of the “Top 20 Summer Festivals” in Smithsonian Magazine and the “Top 9 Festivals” in Ski Magazine. Special activities for kids will be found at the Kimball Art Center’s back patio and parking lot at 38 Park Ave. The Kimball is a great place to start—check out its exhibit before embarking up Main Street, on your way to the food booths at the top. (Brian Staker) Park City Kimball Arts Festival @ Historic Main Street, Park City, 435-649-8882, July 31-Aug. 2, Friday, 5-9 p.m.; Saturday, 9 a.m.-7 p.m.; Sunday, 9 a.m.-6 p.m.; adult weekend pass, $10; child/student weekend pass, $5; children 5 and under, free. Friday locals night: Summit County residents free.

ParkCityKimballArtsFestival.org

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MONDAY 8.3

TUESDAY 8.4

TUESDAY 8.4

The Larry H. Miller Tour of Utah, a multiday cycling race, spins through northern Utah beginning this week. Supporting its claims of “America’s Toughest Stage Race” is the tour’s new 2.HC rating. Normally, climbs in cycling are rated on a 1 (hardest) to 4 (easiest) scale, taking into account the steepness of terrain, the length of climbs and where the climbs occur in the stage. Races with climbs so difficult that they don’t even register on the scale are called HC, for “hors categorie” (“beyond categorization”).

Combine that with seven days of racing, covering 712 miles, with a total vertical gain of 51,442 feet, and you’ve got a pretty tough event.

The Tour of Utah, like its more famous French counterpart, is designed for spectator viewing.

It’s totally free to post up along the race route at any of the seven stages, but if you want to follow the tour in a VIP car or claim front-row seats at the start and finish lines, you’ll need to pay.

Opening day, Aug. 3, will be one of the most entertaining stages for spectators and challenging for competitors. Riders on the 132-mile loop leave downtown Logan for a climb up Logan Canyon to a height of 7,799 feet, then drop into Garden Valley for a lap around Bear Lake before heading back. Tips on where to watch can be found on the Tour’s website. (Katherine Pioli) Larry H. Miller Tour of Utah gatherings @ Logan, Tremonton, Ogden, Antelope Island State Park, Bountiful, Soldier Hollow/Heber Valley, Salt Lake City, Snowbird and Park City, Aug 3-9, 9 a.m.-2 p.m. most days. Free along stage routes, VIP passes $75-$2,500.

TourOfUtah.com

If the ability to insult important figures is comedic gold, Joel McHale is among the wealthiest of Hollywood’s smart alecks. As longtime host of E!’s weekly TV recap The Soup, McHale shares highlights from the week’s TV airings and serves up pointed commentary that makes the state of television seem both alarming and hilarious. It’s a war on “stupid culture,” and McHale is the commander in chief.

How brave, then, that organizers of the 2014 White House Correspondents Dinner invited him to headline the annual event with a standup set, where New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie’s weight, House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi’s face and U.S. military drone strikes were among the targets. “I want the audience to hate me,” the sarcasm-aficionado told Conan O’Brien in a recent interview.

That reputation follows him; even in the early years, he played a very convincing jerky-jerk in a brief scene as a banker in Spider-Man 2. More recently, he garnered praise for his role as Jeff Winger in the NBC/Yahoo! sitcom Community, playing the narcissistic leader of an island-ofmisfit-toys study group. He also played the part of a womanizing boss in the buddy comedy Ted, and an NYPD officer in the horror flick Deliver Us From Evil, showcasing some dramatic flair.

His stand-up sets venture away from modern media, as he shares snippets from his marriedwith-kids life between snarky remarks about 2016 GOP presidential hopefuls. Little doubt he will have some self-deprecating remarks about the Seattle Seahawks and their Super Bowl performance—he is an avid fan. (Robby Poffenberger) Joel McHale @ Wiseguys Live Comedy, 2194 W. 3500 South, West Valley City, 801-463-2909, Aug. 4, 7 p.m., $30, WiseguysComedy.com

Throughout the 1950s and into the early ’60s, American above-ground nuclear testing in Nevada sent radiation into the atmosphere, where it scattered throughout the West. More than 50 years later, those who lived in those areas are still suffering increased rates of cancer, and the federal government continues to evade full responsibility.

In their feature documentary Downwinders— receiving a free work-in-progress screening this week through the Utah Film Center—directors Tim Skousen and Tyler Bastian explore the legacy of those tests and the lives they changed, or in some cases ended. The film touches on key elements of Cold War history such as how nuclear testing became a tool to send saber-rattling messages to enemies. It also examines research about the impact on downwind civilian populations that was covered up for years. In one fascinating footnote, the film looks at the production of the 1956 John Wayne/Susan Hayward film The Conqueror in southern Utah, and how the cast and crew of the production may have been the most famous victims of downwind fallout.

This is primarily a human story, addressing the frustrations and efforts by downwinders in Utah, Idaho and elsewhere to get adequate government compensation and acknowledgement of the impact of this testing. With activist and Utah native J. Truman (pictured) serving as the primary guide through these efforts, Downwinders combines history with the stories of those still living with that history. (Scott Renshaw) Downwinders work-in-progress screening @ Salt Lake City Main Library Auditorium, 210 E. 400 South, 801-524-8200, Aug. 4, 7 p.m., free. UtahFilmCenter.org

Larry H. Miller Tour of Utah

Joel McHale

Downwinders work-in-progress screening

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VISUAL ARTS

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PAIN P T -AR

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MUSIC

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1560 East 3300 South 801-410-4696 dittacaffe.com

BY BRIAN STAKER comments@cityweekly.net @stakerized

I

n a world where people form opinions based on surface impressions, clothes are the surfaces with which we cover our bodies— to protect and hide, but also to reveal something about ourselves. Besides the utilitarian function of clothing as a cultural artifact, it is also infused with mystery, symbolism and status. The exhibit Articles of Clothing opens July 31 at the Rio Gallery, with the aim of examining the phenomenon of apparel to uncover levels of meaning sewn into its fabric.

Fairview artist and Brigham Young University art professor Joseph Ostraff is curating the exhibit, and he proposed the subject to the Utah Division of Arts & Museums, which operates the gallery.

“The idea of clothing [as subject matter] is such a broad topic, and there are so many possible applications and interpretations,” Ostraff says.

Among the artists eventually selected for exhibit were Von Allen, Daniel Barney, Jennifer Barton, Gary Barton, Fidalis Buehler, Brian Christensen, Jen Harmon Allen and Sunny Taylor, as well as Ostraff himself.

“Utah Arts & Museums has a reputation for exhibits with strong social emphases, and the Rio is a true central public gallery, rather than a commercial space,” Ostraff explains. “It’s a place where a dialogue about the subject can take place.” With the rich historical veneer of the building and the gallery as a site to view art, it lends the show a layer of historical context in which clothing as social signifier occurs. It’s implicit in the show, but the site emphasizes that quality.

The artists in the exhibits are all current or former BYU faculty, except Jen Harmon Allen, who is a former graduate student. But it’s not strictly a “BYU art show”—the artists are notable in the larger art community: Ostraff has been the recipient of a Utah Arts Council Visual Arts fellowship and mounted an installation at Arizona State University at Tempe earlier this year.

The variety of media used to address the subject is surprising—from cloth to ceram-

COURTESY PHOTO

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Articles of Clothing explores the cultural and social significance of what we wear.

ic, paint, steel and mixed-media. Former BYU professor Sunny Taylor incorporates geometric and architectural forms in her paintings, and here they demonstrate the ways items of clothing interrelate with other objects in the world, even as they bridge the gap between the human subject and the inanimate object, as the costume in which identity takes the stage. Von Allen and Jen Harmon Allen both contribute 3-D mixed-media pieces. Harmon Allen created beautiful wire-frame dresses inlaid with ceramics, in works such as “Dress of Armor” (pictured left). Burton’s paintings deal with the status or value placed on clothing.

Ostraff’s own paintings, like “Sunday Best #2,” are based on his experience traveling in Ireland. He saw the print designs for 19th-century prison uniforms there. He brought some patterns home and combined them with dress shirts he wears to church.

“They play with what’s really inside a person,” he explains.

“You can wear a white shirt, but still have flaws.”

The word “Articles” in the exhibit’s title suggests the role of clothing as cultural language or signifier. Ostraff admits, “Sure, it could be connected to that. I chose the title because it’s a neutral describer of clothing: open as far as gender or usage. It was all left to the artists to interpret the diversity of the subject, and the components that make up all the elements of things that clothing embodies.”

Ostroff’s “Sunday Best #2” Several of the artists deal directly with gender. Harmon Allen’s works feature a series of dresses worn at fancy, out-on-thetown events, and they take a look at gender as well as status, the way items of clothing manifest gender stereotypes. There have been a number of local events in recent years that have combined art and fashion, often to the detriment of the art, but this one manages to skirt that problem with its idiosyncratic juxtaposition of media, styles and statements about the subject matter.

“Articles” also might refer to the LDS “Articles of Faith” for these faculty and student artists of the Mormon-owned university; there’s nothing ecclesiastical in the work, but there is faith in the power of apparel as conveyer of meaning. The exhibit might be taken as a miniature lexicon of the language of clothing. What this exhibit articulates, more than anything else, is the way these artifacts connect us.

Ostraff notes, “There’s so much implied in clothing, and … in how we see each other, that when we bring it up for discussion in an exhibit like this, it expands our understanding of each other.” CW

ARTICLES OF CLOTHING

Rio Gallery 300 S. Rio Grande St. 801-236-7555 July 31-Aug. 28 Monday-Friday 8 a.m.-5 p.m.

Gallery Stroll artist reception Aug. 21, 6-9 p.m.

ArtsAndMuseums.utah.gov

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FRIDAY 7.31

Utah Symphony: “1812 Overture” We who live along the Wasatch Front—perhaps more than nearly anyone else in contemporary America—are not unfamiliar with the sound of cannons, as winter days often find the mountains ringing with the boom of avalanche control. Yet that doesn’t mean there isn’t something uniquely thrilling about hearing a legendary symphonic work that climaxes with a martial blast.

The Deer Valley Music Festival continues with a Utah Symphony program highlighted by the performance of Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky’s “1812 Overture”— commemorating the brave stand of the Russian army against Napoleon’s invading forces—accompanied by Cannoneers of the Wasatch. The program features several other pieces with similarly epic sensibilities—from John Philip Sousa’s “The Thunderer” to George Gershwin’s “An American in Paris”—but we know everybody’s just waiting to feel the ground shake, and for the mountains around a ski resort to ring with cannons that are all about starting an avalanche. Of feeling, that is. (Scott Renshaw) Utah Symphony: “1812 Overture” @ Deer Valley Snow Park Amphitheater, 2250 Deer Valley Drive, Park City, 801-355-2787, July 31, 7:30 p.m., $10-$52. DeerValleyMusicFestival.org

PERFORMANCE THEATER

Alice in Wonderland Salty Dinner Theater, Dry Creek Steakhouse, 10290 S. State, 801-446-6639, July 30, 7:30 p.m.; Joe Morley’s BBQ, 100 W. Center, Midvale, 801-255-8928, July 31, 7:30 p.m., SaltyDinnerTheater.com Annie Get Your Gun Murray Park Amphitheater, 495 E. 5300 South, 801-824-2694, Monday-Saturday, 8 p.m., through Aug. 5, MurrayArtsCouncil.org The Book of Mormon Capitol Theatre, 50 W. 200 South, Tuesday-Thursday, 7:30 p.m.; Friday, 8 p.m.; Saturday, 2 & 8 p.m.; Sunday, 1 & 6:30 p.m.; through Aug. 9, tickets limited, SaltLakeCity.Broadway.com Bridge to Terabithia Briham’s Playhouse, 25 N. 300 West, 435-251-8000, Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday, 7 p.m., Aug. 4-29, BrighamsPlayhouse.com Carmina Burana Utah Festival Opera Company, Ellen Eccles Theatre, 43 S. Main, Logan, 435-750-0300, Aug. 5, 1 p.m., UFOMT.org Crazy for You SCERA Shell, 699 S. State, Orem, 801-225-2787, July 31-Aug. 15, SCERA.org Disney’s Beauty and The Beast Tuacahn Center for the Arts, 1100 Tuacahn Drive, Ivins, 435-652-3300, through Oct. 17, Tuacahn.org Disney’s The Little Mermaid Hale Centre Theatre, 3333 S. Decker Lake Drive, West Valley City, 801-984-9000, through Aug. 1, HCT.org Disney’s When You Wish Tuacahn Center for the Arts, 1100 Tuacahn Drive, Ivins, 435-652-3300, through Oct. 16, Tuacahn.org Fiddler on the Roof Brigham’s Playhouse, 25 N. 300 West, 435-251-8000, Wednesday, Friday, Saturday, 7 p.m., Aug. 5-Sept. 12, BrighamsPlayhouse.com Grease’d: Happy Days Are Here Again! Desert Star Theatre, 4861 S. State, Murray, 801-266-2600, Monday, Wednesday, Thursday, 7 p.m.; Friday, 7 & 9:30 p.m.; Saturday, 2:30, 6 & 8:30 p.m.; through Aug. 22, DesertStar.biz Into the Woods Hale Center Theater, 225 W. 400 North, Orem, 801-226-8600, 7:30 p.m., through Aug. 15, HaleTheater.org Neil Simon Festival: Chapter Two, The Foreigner, I’m Not Rappaport, They’re Playing Our Song Heritage Center Theater, 105 N. 100 East, Cedar City, 435-327-8673, through Aug. 8, SimonFest.org

Saturday’s Voyeur Salt Lake Acting Company, 168 W. 500 North, 801-363-7522, WednesdaySaturday, 7:30 p.m., Sunday, 1 & 6 p.m., through Aug. 30, SaltLakeActingCompany.org Sister Act Tuachan Center for the Arts, 1100 Tuacahn Drive, Ivins, 435-652-3300, through Oct. 15, Tuacahn.org Utah Festival Opera & Musical Theatre: La Bohème, Carousel, How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying, Man of La Mancha Ellen Eccles Theatre, 43 S. Main, Logan, 435-750-0300, through Aug. 8, UFOMT.org Utah Shakespeare Festival: Amadeus, Charley’s Aunt, Dracula, Henry IV Part Two, King Lear, South Pacific, The Taming of the Shrew, The Two Gentlemen of Verona 351 W. Center St., Cedar City, 800-752-9849, through Sept. 5, Bard.org When I Grow Up: A Musical Review Titus Productions Theatre Co., Sugar Space, 616 E. Wilmington Ave., 801-792-5582, July 30-Aug. 1, 7 p.m.

The Wizard of Oz Sundance Summer Theatre, Sundance Resort, 8841 N. Alpine Loop Road., 866-734-4428, Monday, Thursday-Saturday, 8 p.m., through Aug. 7, SundanceResort.com

CLASSICAL & SYMPHONY

Utah Symphony: 1812 Overture Snow Park Amphitheater, 2250 Deer Valley Drive, Park City, 801-355-2787, July 31, 7:30 p.m., DeerValleyMusicFestival.org (see feature above) Ozomatli with Utah Symphony Snow Park Amphitheater, 2250 Deer Valley Drive, Park City, Aug. 1, 7:30 p.m., DeerValleyMusicFestival.org

DANCE

World Travelers Utah Cultural Celebration Center, 1355 W. 3100 South, West Valley City, 801-965-5100, Aug. 3, 8 p.m., CulturalCelebration.org

COMEDY & IMPROV

Clean Comedy Night with Rodney Norman & Friends Covey Center for the Arts, 425 W. Center, Provo, June 26, 8 p.m., Crowdsourced Comedy Night The Club at 50 West, 50 W. 300 South, 385-229-1462, Tuesday,

moreESSENTIALS 7 p.m., through Aug. 25, 18+ (must be accompanied by 21+), CrowdsourcedLive.com Joel McHale Wiseguys Comedy Club, 2194 W. 3500 South, West Valley City, 801-463-2909, Aug. 4, 7 & 9:30 p.m., WiseguysComedy.com (see p. 22) Jon Crist Wiseguys Comedy Club, 269 25th St., Ogden, 801-622-5588, July 31-Aug. 1, 8 p.m., WiseguysComedy.com Nick Cobb/Sean Peabody Egyptian Theatre, 328 Main, Park City, 435-649-9371, July 31-Aug. 1, 8 p.m., EgyptianTheatreCompany.org Nikki Glaser Wiseguys Comedy Club, 2194 W. 3500 South, West Valley City, 801-463-2909, July 31-Aug. 1, 7:30 & 9:30 p.m., WiseguysComedy.com Sunday Night Special with Andy Gold Wiseguys Comedy Club, 2194 W. 3500 South, West Valley City, 801-463-2909, Aug. 2, 7:30 p.m., WiseguysComedy.com

LITERATURE

COMPLETE LISTINGS ONLINE @ CITYWEEKLY.NET

KingsEnglish.com Spencer Anderson: The Last Raider Barnes & Noble, 5249 S. State, Murray, 801-261-4040, Aug. 1, 12 p.m., BarnesAndNoble.com

FESTIVALS & FAIRS

9th West Farmers Market Jordan Park, 1060 S. 900 West, Sunday, 10 a.m.-2 p.m., through October 25, 9thWestFarmersMarket.org Bountiful/Davis Summerfest Bountiful City Park, 200 W. 400 North, Bountiful, 801-4513660, Aug. 5-8, BDAC.org/Summerfest Day of Hope Car Show Viridian Event Center, 8030 S. 1825 West, West Jordan, Aug. 1, 12 p.m., DayOfHopeCarShow.com Downtown Farmers Market Pioneer Park, 300 W. 300 South, Saturday, 8 a.m.-2 p.m, through October 24, SLCFarmersMarket.org Farmer’s Market Thursday Kuwahara Farms,

12600 South 732 West, Draper, 801-545-9980, Thursday, 9 a.m., KuwaharaFarms.weebly.com Ogden Pride Festival Ogden City Amphitheater, 343 25th St., Ogden, Aug. 1, 1-6 p.m., OgdenPride.org Park City Kimball Arts Festival Historic Main Street, Park City, July 31-Aug. 2, ParkCityKimballArtsFestival.org (see p. 22) Park Silly Sunday Market Historic Main Street, Park City, 435-655-0994, Sunday, 10 a.m., ParkSillySundayMarket.com Price City International Days Price City, 435-636-3180, July 30-Aug. 1, PriceUtah.net/ InternationalDays/InternationalDays2015.asp Provo Farmers Market Pioneer Park, 500 W. Center St., Provo, Saturday, 9 a.m.-2 p.m., through Oct. 31, ProvoFarmersMarket.org Springville World Folkfest Spring Acres Arts Park, 700 S. 1300 East, Springville, July 27-Aug. 1, WorldFolkfest.com

AUTHOR APPEARANCES

L. Jackson Newell: The Electric Edge of Academe The King’s English Bookshop, 1511 S. 1500 East, 801-484-9100, July 30, 7 p.m.,

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CHECK US

Rocky Mountain Raceway August 8th

USANA Amplitheatre August 29th

Your source for Art & Entertainment Tickets

moreESSENTIALS

VISUAL ART GALLERIES & MUSEUMS

Articles of Clothing Rio Gallery, 300 S. 400 West, 801-245-7272, July 31-Aug.28, MondayFriday, 8 a.m.-5 p.m. (see p.24) Brian Lindley A Light in the Dark Art Barn/Finch Lane Gallery, 1340 E. 100 South, 801-596-5000, Monday-Friday, 9 a.m.-5 p.m., through July 31 Darin Jones: Celebration Hotel Monaco, 15 W. 200 South, 801-805-1801, through Nov. 30, Monaco-SaltLakeCity.com Duane Linklater: salt 11 Utah Museum of Fine Arts, 410 Campus Drive, 801-581-7332, through Aug. 1, UMFA.utah.edu Eleanor Schultz: Controlled Burn: Pyrography Art Barn/Finch Lane Gallery, 1340 E. 100 South, 801-596-5000, through July 31, SaltLakeArts.org Flora+Fauna Alice Gallery, 617 S. Temple, 801-236-7555, Monday-Friday 8 a.m.-5 p.m., through Sept. 11 From Crayons to Krylon: Paintings by Alex D. Hall Day-Riverside Library, 1575 W. 1000 North, 801-594-8632, through Aug. 3, SLCPL.org Highlights of the Collection Tour Utah Museum of Fine Arts, 410 Campus Center Drive, University of Utah, through Oct. 7, UMFA.Utah.edu Jared William Christensen: Strange Environment Corrine and Jack Sweet Branch Library, 455 F Street, 801-594-8651, through Aug. 15, SLCPL.org Jerry Hardesty: Exposed Salt Lake City Main Library, 210 E. 400 South, 801-524-8200, Monday-Saturday, through July 31, SLCPL.org

COMPLETE LISTINGS ONLINE @ CITYWEEKLY.NET

Justin Carruth: Depart Broadway Center Cinemas, 111 E. 300 South, 385-215-6768, through Oct. 3, CUArtCenter.org Massively SMALL J GO Gallery, 408 Main, Park City, 435-649-1006, Sunday-Thursday, 11 a.m.-5 p.m.; Friday & Saturday, 11 a.m.-9 p.m., opening reception July 31, 6-9 p.m., JGOGallery.com Milton Neely: Metal Art, a Natural Inspiration Salt Lake City Library, 210 E. 400 South, 801-594-8623, Monday-Saturday, through Aug. 27, SLCPL.org Namon Bills: Elements Art Barn/Finch Lane Gallery, 1340 E. 100 South, 801-596-5000, Monday-Friday, 9 a.m.-5 p.m., through July 31 Rob Wees: Dreams Unfolded Salt Lake Library Sprague Branch, 2131 S. 1100 East, 801-594-8640, through Sept. 18, SLCPL.org Rodrigo Valenzuela: Prole CUAC, 175 E 200 S, 385-215-6768, Tuesday-Saturday, through Sept. 12 Scott Tsuchitani: Internment Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, 20 S. West Temple, 801-328-4201, Tuesday-Saturday, through Aug. 1, UtahMOCA.org Sean Morello: Constellations & Supersymmetries Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, 20 S. West Temple, 801-328-4201, through Aug. 1, UtahMOCA.org Svavar Jonatansson and Jared Steffensen: You Are Here Kimball Art Center, 638 Park Ave., Park City, 435-649-8882, through Aug. 23, KimballArtCenter.org Winston Inoway & Julie Tippets Green Loft, 2834 Highland Drive, 801-599-5363, through Aug. 7, GoGreenLoft.com

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ME SUM

NING I A T TER R EN

S

L A I T SSEN

E

DEER VALLEY GROCERY-CAFE

Your Not-SoLocal Grocer

DINE

Inside or out, Deer Valley Grocery-Cafe offers excellent food.

Be sure to check out our growing bitters and cocktail mixers collection. Just in time for summer.

Caputo’s Downtown 314 West 300 South 801.531.8669 Caputo’s On 15th 1516 South 1500 East 801.486.6615 Caputo’s Holladay 4670 S. 2300 E. 801.272.0821 Caputo’s U of U 215 S. Central Campus Drive 801.583.8801

caputosdeli.com

H

ere’s the mission: Find a grocery store/cafe that offers top-tier restaurant-quality food at fair prices, plus a sunny dining deck overlooking a lake. Oh, and it has to be dog-friendly and located in the most affluent neighborhood in all of Utah.

Stumped? Not if you’ve visited the Deer Valley Grocery-Cafe.

You may have driven past the Deer Valley Grocery-Cafe on your way to Snow Park Lodge or to Silver Lake Village in Deer Valley without ever noticing it. That’s because the grocerycafe is hidden away inside the Deer Valley Plaza building, in lower Deer Valley. Adjacent to the Plaza building are the Deer Valley ponds, where, from the deck, you can watch ducks fishing, dogs frolicking and humans paddleboarding. In fact, you can get a paddleboard lesson right on the spot from Park City SUP (stand-up paddling), if you’re game.

The Deer Valley Grocery-Cafe has become a necessity for friends of mine visiting from out of town and staying in or near Deer Valley. It offers an array of specialty foods ranging from fresh-baked breads, pastries, baguettes, biscotti and such, to soups and stews (chili con carne, beef Burgundy, Deer Valley turkey chili), fresh salads, pastas, condiments, cheeses, olive oils and vinegars, house-smoked salmon, desserts and frozen items (handmade pizzas, quiches, etc.) to take home. It’s the perfect place for visitors to stock their condos, especially since the grocery-cafe also has a license to sell booze for takeout. Why, you can even purchase housemade dog treats there, not to mention gift baskets that are perfect for enjoying during Deer Valley Resort summer concerts.

Still, my favorite part of the Deer Valley Grocery-Cafe is the cafe itself. I think it’s still something of a Park City secret, although word is beginning to leak out. The cafe is open daily from 7:30 a.m.-8:30 p.m., serving breakfast, lunch and dinner, with menus that change with the seasons. Highlights from the breakfast menu include house-made challah French toast with whipped butter, powdered sugar, maple syrup, fresh berries and strawberryrhubarb compote ($9.70); housemade yogurt with seasonal berries, fresh mint and orangevanilla-bean simple syrup ($7.25); and the vegetarian-friendly avocado and beet toast ($6.50): avocado, beet hummus, micro greens, Shepherds Dairy goat cheese and black

TED SCHEFFLER

Who doesn’t love a vast selection of cheese, meats and fine chocolates?

BY TED SCHEFFLER comments@cityweekly.net @critic1

Hawaiian sea salt on toasted freshbaked wild-rice harvest bread.

Additional breakfast items include lox toast, breakfast paninis, Irish oatmeal, crustless quiche, and my favorite, the Southwestern breakfast wrap—an “everythingbut-the-kitchen-sink” wrap featuring scrambled eggs, black beans, pepper jack cheese, green chilies, baby heirloom tomatoes, fresh guacamole, spiced spuds and salsa fresca in a whole-wheat tortilla ($9.65). The Southwestern wrap is my go-to breakfast for carbo-loading on Deer Valley ski days.

Lunch, along with alcoholic libations, is available in the Cafe from 11:30 a.m.-8:30 p.m., and runs the gamut from starters, salads, soups and chili to sandwiches, paninis, tacos, pizzas and a handful of specialties, like the delicious butternut squash and shiitake mushroom enchilada ($14.25) with cilantro sour cream and tomatillo sauce.

The enchiladas—there’s also a roasted chicken enchilada—are served with Copper Moose Farm field greens, tomato, honeyDijon vinaigrette and Southwest beans.

I have to admit, beet hummus ($7) isn’t something that held much appeal for me— until I tasted it. The purple-hued hummus is a garbanzo bean-beet combination, blended with tahini and served with flaxseed crackers and sugar snap peas. Turns out the beet hummus is a great starter; shame on me for doubting the Deer Valley culinary crew. For a heartier appetizer—or as just a nosh with beer, wine or cocktail—I recommend the massive turkey-chili nachos plate ($10.75) with Deer Valley Oomph!-spiced tortilla chips, green onions and cilantro sour cream.

If you love the Oomph! spice mix as much as I do, it’s available for purchase in the grocery.

I’ve largely given up on fish tacos in restaurants, since they’re typically made with bland, cheap tilapia and are usually a disappointment. Not at Deer Valley Grocery-Cafe, however. Here, the tacos are made from salmon dusted with rice flour (gluten-free), then flash-fried to a crispy

Salivate for the salmon taco at the Deer Valley Grocery-Cafe crust, and served with grilled scallioncitrus slaw and heavenly roasted poblano guacamole, drizzled on warm corn tortillas and sprinkled with pumpkin seeds.

There is one aspect of service at the grocery-cafe, however, that I’m not too keen on. Customers line up at a single cash register during meal service—both those buying food to take out and those dining in the cafe—to order and pay for their meals and drinks in advance. The food is then delivered to dine-in customers’ tables. That means having to select your entire meal and beverages in advance. If you wish to add dessert, a second cocktail, an order of nachos or whatever, you have to return to the (sometimes lengthy) line. It’s tedious, frankly. I wish the management would require only customers buying takeout items from the grocery to pay at the register, and offer full, sit-down table service for customers who are eating in.

That register line gets especially crowded on Sunday evenings, but for good reason.

The grocery-cafe offers a special menu with items grilled on the deck on Sundays beginning at 5 p.m., along with live music featuring artists like Steve Schuffert and Mike Rogers. It’s hard to find a better way to spend a Sunday evening than enjoying a Niman Ranch beef burger with Cabot white cheddar on the Deer Valley Grocery-Cafe deck, while Steve Schuffert treats you to classic tunes by The Beatles, Creedence Clearwater Revival and others. CW

DEER VALLEY GROCERY-CAFE

1375 Deer Valley Drive South Deer Valley Plaza Building 435-615-2400 DeerValley.com/dining

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32 | JULY 30, 2015

FOOD MATTERS

BY TED SCHEFFLER @critic1

IT TAKES A

village TO CURB YOUR HUNGER!

Tasting the Wasatch

There is still a little time left to get tickets to this year’s Taste of the Wasatch foodand-drink extravaganza, held to help feed Utah’s homeless and underserved. The event takes place Sunday, Aug. 2, from noon-4 p.m. at Solitude. Funds raised from Taste of the Wasatch will benefit the nonprofit programs of 3 Squares, Inc., Utahns Against Hunger and Green Urban Lunch Box. The afternoon will feature boutique wineries and craft beers, a silent auction and live music by Lazlo and The Dukes, plus the main attraction: food provided by more than 50 of Utah’s top restaurants and bakeries. New participants for this year include Bistro 222, Feldman’s Deli, Copper Canyon, R&R BBQ, East Liberty Tap House, Current Fish & Oyster, Harbor Seafood & Steak, Porch, Lydia’s Locals, Taqueria 27, Hub & Spoke, and The Annex. General admission tickets are $90 and reserved seating is available for $120$125. A portion of the ticket price is tax deductible. For tickets and information, visit TasteOfTheWasatch.org.

DED

U INCL NOT AGE

VILL

italianvillageslc.com 5370 S. 900 E. / 801.266.4182 M O N -TH U 11a-11p / F R I - SAT 11a-12a / S U N 3p-10p

n in th & n in th & 2 5 4 sou th m ain

2014

Brazilian ’Cue

Through Labor Day, Rodizio Grill (600 S. 700 East, 801-220-0500, RodizioGrill.com), known for Brazilian fare, is featuring an Americano BBQ Fest with items such as BBQ chicken, smoked brisket and ribs with buttered corn, mac & cheese, molasses, baked beans and more.

Art & Artisans @ Alta

2005

2007 2008

voted best coffee house

The Wasatch Art Soiree 2015—held at Alta’s Albion Grill on Friday, Aug. 21, from 6-10 p.m.—will highlight not only local artists, but local food artisans. Five local chefs will each present three culinary creations for Wasatch Art Soiree guests, who will cast their votes for a favorite chef. The winner will receive an Alta Community Enrichment People’s Choice Grant of $1,000. The competing chefs are Katie Weinner (SLC POP & Top Chef contestant), Carl Rubadue (Saucy Skillet), Amy Oelerich (MediumRare Chefs), Andy Walter (Dottie’s Biscuit Barn) and Adam Kreisel (Chaia Cucina). There will also be live music by St. Boheme, with local food, beer, wine and signature cocktails from Beehive Gin and Sugarhouse Distillery. Tickets are $50 in advance, $75 the day of the event, or $125 for a VIP ticket. AltaArts.org.

Start your day off right.

Pick up the July/August issue of Devour Utah

Quote of the week: Starvation, not sin, is the parent of modern crime.

—Oscar Wilde Food Matters 411: teds@xmission.com

Go to devourutah.com for pick up locations

GOODEATS Complete listings at cityweekly.net Featuring dining destinations from buffets and rooms with a view to mom & pop joints, chic cuisine and some of our dining critic’s faves!

Alberto’s Mexican Food Bakery • Cafe • Market •Spirits

-Liquor Outlet-Creekside Cafe-Market-

NOW OPEN!

Alberto’s is a local favorite for quenching the latenight munchies. It features casual, Sonoran-style South of the Border fare, with an emphasis on burritos, enchiladas and tacos. The tortillas are terrific, whether they’re used for breakfast burritos or the scrumptious carne asada burritos. The chicken enchiladas really rock, as does the fiery salsa. You’ll also find Mexican sandwiches called tortas here, along with chimichangas, carnitas, chile verde and dozens of other tasty items from the extensive menu. And Alberto’s is open all night. 511 S. 300 West, Salt Lake City, 801-531-0411

CousCous Mediterranean Grill

As seen on “ Diners,

Finn’s Cafe

“Like having dinner at Mom’s in the mountains” -Cincinnati Enquirer

-CityWeekly

801 582-5807 www.ruthsdinEr.Com

Despite being a brewery, Desert Edge is a familyfriendly restaurant and pub that offers excellent lunch, dinner and late-night meals at good prices. Favorites include the French onion soup and the grilled salmon sandwich. Brewmaster Chris Haas handcrafts Desert Edge’s beers, including the popular Utah Pale Ale. 602 E. 500 South, Salt Lake City, 801-521-8917, DesertEdgeBrewery.com

JULY 30, 2015 | 33

4160 Emigration Canyon road

Desert Edge Brewery at The Pub

| CITY WEEKLY |

“In a perfect world, every town would have a diner just like Ruth’s”

-CreeksiDe PAtios-Best BreAkfAst 2008 & 2010-85 YeArs AnD GoinG stronG-DeliCious MiMosAs & BlooDY MArY’s-sAt & sun 11AM-2PM-live MusiC & weekenD BrunCh-

The name Finn has been a mainstay of the Utah dining scene since Finn Gurholt opened the original Finn’s in 1952 at the top of Parley’s Way. Today, the Finn’s family tradition continues at Finn’s Cafe, where Scandinavian specialties such as Norwegian waffles with lingonberries and sour cream, Jule Kake French toast, poached fish and pyttipanna. The Norsk omelet with bay shrimp, Havarti cheese and capers provides an interesting alternative to the more common array of standard breakfast choices—which are served all day, by the way. If it’s non-breakfast grub you’re after, at lunchtime, the fried chicken and Wiener schnitzel are terrific. The restaurant has a nice, modern Euro vibe, too. 1624 S. 1100 East, Salt Lake City, 801-4674000, FinnsCafe.net

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Serving American Drive-ins AnD Dives” Comfort Food Since 1930

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ruthscreekside.com 4170 Emigration Canyon Road 801.582.0457

CousCous Mediterranean Grill’s menu features a unique blend of Greek, Italian and Mediterranean flavors, with a focus on healthy, affordable food—everything on the menu is $14 or less. Owner and chef Nick Shams has been in the restaurant business for more than 20 years, and his expertise shows. Try fresh and flavorful options such as the warm whole-grain seafood wraps with Atlantic salmon or butterfly shrimp, shwarma, veggie couscous bowl or lemon scampi. The fresh-baked pizza “flats” are made from scratch and include tasty flavors such as chicken pesto, the four seasons (shrimp, ham, artichoke and mushroom), islander style with ham and pineapple, barbecue chicken and the CousCous specialty, with feta, tomatoes, olive oil, garlic and fresh basil. 5470 S. 900 East, Murray, 801-938-8307, CousCousGrill.com

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34 | JULY 30, 2015

BEER, WINE & SPIRITS

Wine Flight

Discovering wines, brews and more at Tracy Aviary.

BY TED SCHEFFLER comments@cityweekly.net @critic1

E

at-Drink SLC is a local organization dedicated to “raising the visibility of local businesses in the food and drink industry” and building recognition for Salt Lake City’s dining and drink scene. It’s inaugural event—a fundraiser for nonprofits Tracy Aviary, SB Dance and Comunidades Unidas—held at Tracy Aviary a couple of weeks ago, was a sell-out and a very wellexecuted affair. I and most of the attendees I spoke to were very impressed—not just by the excellent food provided by an array of local restaurants, nor by the bevy of beverages, but by the organization and smooth flow of the entire event.

A highlight for me was meandering through the aviary tasting some wines I hadn’t tried before and getting reacquainted with others that I had. There were 20 different wineries, brewers and distilleries in attendance offering samples of

everything from Rosé and hefeweissen to gin and port. Here are a few of my favorite discoveries from Eat-Drink SLC. My first stop was at Starmont Winery, where I sampled a couple of Carneros wines: Starmont Chardonnay 2012 ($19.99) and Starmont Rosé 2014 ($19.99). The Chardonnay was surprisingly crisp and acidic, with nice texture and apple-pear aromas. The Starmont Rosé is a perfect summertime wine. Made from Pinot Noir grapes in the saignée style (“bleeding off” some of the juice from the wine must), this salmon-colored wine is bright with strawberry and white-peach notes. Another excellent Rosé was Lorenza 2014 ($17.99). Made from an old vines blend of Grenache, Carignan, Mourvèdre and Cinsault, Lorenza Rosé is a terrific Provençal-style wine with delicate floral aromas—a real Rosé that would satisfy the most discriminating Southern French palate.

Next door to Lorenza at Eat-Drink SLC was Utah’s own Ruth Lewandowski Wines, the brainchild of wine wizard, Evan Lewandowski. I’ve written at length about Lewandowski’s wines in the past, so I won’t belabor the point here.

Suffice it to say I was reminded how unique

r u o y t e G ! n O lunch

DRINK his Naomi ($24.99), Boaz ($27.99) and Chilion ($24.99) wines are—a definite departure from routine winemaking.

Turning my attention temporarily to bubbles, I discovered the refreshing Rotari Brut NV ($13.99) sparkler from TrentinoAlto Adige, Italy. Apple flavors mesh with stone fruit and brioche aromas in this pleasant bottle of bubbles. And, I was happy to see one of my favorite domestic sparkling wines—Gruet Brut NV ($16.99)—which comes from New Mexico, of all places, being poured. It’s all-American, yet this is very much a French sparkler in style, a méthode Champenoise wine that tastes like the real stuff, at about a third of the price of non-vintage Champagne. Even better is

Gruet Brut Rosé NV ($18.99).

Utah-based Bon Vivant Imports brings attention-getting wines from Spain, Italy and Portugal to our state, and I especially enjoyed Luigi Voghera Langhe Arneis DOC 2013 ($12.49), from Piedmont, Italy. It’s a crisp, dry, full-bodied wine that I’d pair with fish and seafood. I also liked the perfumed aromas and cranberry/currant/cherry flavors of Quinta do Romeu Reserva Douro 2010 ($17.99), from Portugal. This juicy red would be excellent with lamb tagine or duck cassoulet.

My favorite beer of the evening was Red Rock Brewing’s Elephino Double IPA ($3.55/500ml). This American-style IPA is double dry-hopped with whole Amarillo hops—the first whiff whacks you upside the head. The crisp, heady hoppiness of Elephino tends to obscure the fact that this is an 8-percent ABV brew.

Other highlights included Graham’s Six Grapes NV ($22.99), a good-value everyday port; Jack Rabbit gin ($27.99) from Beehive Distilling; and Baileyana “ Firepeak” Pinot Noir 2013 ($20.99). Find your own favorites at the next Eat-Drink SLC event. CW

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GOODEATS Complete listings at cityweekly.net Dragon Diner

At Dragon Diner, lunch specials are affordably priced, including the egg roll or paper-wrapped chicken with fried or steamed rice. Popular items on the extensive menu include dishes such as kung pao chicken, beef with broccoli and snow peas, chow fun, tangerine beef, blackbean pork, Szechuan shrimp, egg foo yung, mabo tofu and mu shu. 1331 E. 3900 South, Salt Lake City, 801-272-9333, TheDragonDiner.com

Eggs in the City

Enjoy breakfast or lunch in a friendly, warm and hip environment. The owners took a garage and converted it into a stylish, enticing eatery. Try the eggs Benedict, French toast, custom-tailored omelets, huevos rancheros or cheese blintzes for breakfast. The huge salads—especially the Cobb salad—sandwiches like the Philly cheesesteak, and the chile verde are lunchtime favorites. 1675 E. 1300 South, Salt Lake City, 801-581-0809

Big Jim’s Burger

Lone Star Taqueria

2014

Mazza

Mazza owner Ali Sabbah keeps a tight rein on his restaurants, so the service and food is always top-notch.

Beginning as a small counter-service falafel parlor, Mazza has blossomed into the city’s finest full-service Middle Eastern eatery, complete with an adventurous wine list that features an international selection, including some from Lebanon, Morocco and Greece. Mazza offers a wide array of Middle Eastern dishes including lamb and rice dolaa, musakhan, shawarma and kebabs, delectable baked kafta, maghmoor and much, much more. Before you head out the door, be sure to indulge in Mazza’s signature cream pudding, called kanafeh, with shredded phyllo dough, garnished with pistachios and drizzled with orange-blossom syrup. 912 E. 900 South, Salt Lake City, 801-521-4572; 1515 S. 1500 East, Salt Lake City, 801-484-9259, MazzaCafe.com

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This is Utah’s one-of-a-kind living-food bar, with unprocessed organic dishes, including a curried seaweed roll and broccoli soup. Beautiful plate presentations, healthy dishes and a peaceful atmosphere are the restaurant’s lure. Owner Omar Abou-Ismail swears by the health benefits of raw food. A vegetable purist, gardener and forager, he harvests most of the restaurant’s herbs and spices himself. It all culminates in fine cuisine such as raw pasta made from zucchini piled with greens, sprouts and hand-chopped vegetables, then topped with a sundried-tomato sauce and a pureed macadamia nut & Irish moss alfredo-style sauce. And for dessert: caramel-chocolate pie. 2148 S. Highland Drive, Salt Lake City, 801-486-0332, OmarsRawtopia.com

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The Lone Star Taqueria has been around for quite some time, and looks like someone transported a taco shack from a Baja beach right into Cottonwood Heights. It’s a cool and kitschy place, with cold Mexican cervezas served in glass cowboy boots and a rockin’ house sound system.

The only thing missing is a beach. Everything is fresh at this inexpensive eatery, from the tortillas and salsas to the tamales and tacos. The mahi-mahi fish tacos with

cilantro aioli are wildly popular at the Lone Star, and the zippy jalapeño-spiked guacamole is delicious. The burritos aren’t bad, but at Lone Star Taqueria, it’s really all about the tacos. 2265 E. Fort Union Blvd., Salt Lake City, 801-944-2300, LoneStarTaqueria.com

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Big Jim’s has a solid reputation for its burgers. Like Apollo Burger, Crown Burger and others, this burger joint is a fusion of burgers and Greek cuisine. So, along with burgers on the extensive menu, you’ll find chicken, fish, gyros, souvlaki, a rib-eye sandwich and even fajitas and the like.

The pastrami burger is said by some to be life-changing.

2922 S. 1900 West, Ogden, 801-622-9256; 3511 Harrison Blvd., Ogden, 801-621-5557, BigJimsBurgers.net

Deli Done Right

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REVIEW BITES A sampler of Ted Scheffler’s reviews Ekamai Thai

Come Celebrate Peruvian Independence Month!

Fresh homemade food. Family owned. • 3411 Redwood Road • 801.906.0934

Each of the two locations—in downtown Salt Lake City and Sugar House—is different, but they’re both comfy, friendly spots. At the smaller downtown store, the menu features six menu items that change daily, although some curry standards make the cut every day. My favorite Sugar House appetizer is the chicken larb: minced chicken seasoned with fish sauce, chilies, onion, kaffir lime leaves, garlic and Thai basil or cilantro, served with lettuce leaves for taco-style wraps. It’s good, but not as spicy as I’m used to; in general, the dishes at Ekamai are prepared on the mild side. I’d highly recommend the garlic noodle with tiger prawns; a bowl of yellow curry with chicken, potatoes and carrots, on the other hand, was pedestrian at best. As with many Ekamai dishes, it came with steamed broccoli and shredded carrots on the side. The traditional pad see ew is thick, flat rice noodles stir-fried with egg, baby corn, broccoli and an overdose of carrots in Ekamai’s rich see ew sauce. Somebody in the kitchen needs to cut back on the carrots, but for a taste of Thailand and Thai hospitality, Ekamai should be on your radar. Reviewed July 16. 336 W. 300 South, 801-363-2717; 1405 E. 2100 South, 801-906-0908; EkamaiThai.com

Little America Lucky H Bar & Grille

197 North Main St • Layton • 801-544-4344

Endless ta pas

Wine Wednesdays

The newly decked-out Lucky H Bar sports a soothing blueand-tan color scheme, a post-modern looking circularshaped bar, and contemporary lighting and fixings. As for the Grille, it looks like a classy steakhouse, with comfy chairs and banquettes. The menu is much like Little America itself: a mix of old and new. Chef Berhard Gotz’s menu ranges from Continental to more nouveau offerings. For starters, we shared the assorted appetizer platter of one tasty crab cake with remoulade, a single seared scallop, one jumbo shrimp, and a generous portion of homemade gravlax with capers; for sharing purposes, how about two scallops and two shrimp? There are Mad Men-style throwbacks, such as Prime Rib in both a 14-ounce “Gentlemen’s” cut or more petite 10-ounce “Lady’s” portion. But there are also upto-date choices like a tender, perfectly roasted Mary’s freerange, all-natural chicken. The house salad could have used some work presentation-wise; a giant cucumber slice and oversized chunk of underripe tomato required a knife and fork to eat. Reviewed July 2. 500 S. Main, 801-596-5704, SaltLake.LittleAmerica.com

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VACATION

Subtraction

by Ad Dishin’

CINEMA

Vacation loses its comedic momentum through marketing overkill.

BY SCOTT RENSHAW scottr@cityweekly.net @scottrenshaw

E

Skyler Gisondo, Steele Stebbins, Christina Applegate and Ed Helms in Vacation is a game-enough performer that she can wring the most out of a sequence involving repeated bouts of projectile vomiting, Vacation too often falls back on that notion that simply being naughty—“Can you believe how many time we let the younger boy drop F-bombs!”—is the same as being funny.

Still, it’s hard not to wonder how much funnier Vacation might have seemed if Warner Bros. had been willing to allow just a little more discovery of its wildest high concepts.

In yet another often-marketed scene, Vacation plays on a callback to a signature bit from the original movie, involving a sexy woman flirting with Rusty while they’re both driving. It’s a terrific concept for a visual joke, but a movie comedy’s momentum is ruined when you’re spending several minutes sitting through the set-up for a joke whose payoff has been hammered into your retinas for weeks. In a way, I feel bad for Daley and Goldstein, who may fumble a few opportunities, but mostly collide with a marketing department whose job isn’t to trust that the new Vacation will stand on its own. CW

VACATION

BB.5 Ed Helms Christina Applegate Chris Hemsworth Rated R

| CITY WEEKLY |

TRY THESE Anchorman (2004) Will Ferrell Christina Applegate Rated PG-13

The Hangover (2009) Bradley Cooper Ed Helms Rated R

Horrible Bosses (2011) Jason Bateman Jason Sudeikis Rated R

JULY 30, 2015 | 37

National Lampoon’s Vacation (1983) Chevy Chase Beverly D’Angelo Rated R

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ing stale, and James deals with his unwelcome role as victim of bullying from younger Kevin. And Vacation in general tries to do that thing so many 21st-century raunch-comedies do, where filmmakers try to balance the gross-outs with the idea that it’s really all about people and their emotions and their sensitivities and whatnot.

It’s not actually about any of that, which is just fine much of the time. The running bit involving the Griswolds’ mutant car and its incomprehensible features—a GPS system that suddenly starts shouting in Korean; a rotating driver’s seat—somehow keeps finding great material, and there’s a terrific moment early on about a friend passiveaggressively complaining about Debbie not “liking” her Instagram pictures. In general, Vacation is at its best when it’s simply surreal—like Rusty’s frustrations trying to kick tumbleweeds—or making the most of the comic performances by Applegate and Chris Hemsworth (as Rusty’s justifiably narcissistic brother-in-law) rather than going for the gross-out gag.

But go for those gags Vacation does, in ways that are sometimes predictable even beyond the bits that have been plastered all over the trailers. An extended sequence and multiple punch lines are built around Rusty’s lack of familiarity with terminology for a certain sexual practice, which might have been funny if anything else in the movie suggested that he was quite so naïve; he certainly must be acquainted with the concept of a “glory hole.” And while Applegate

| CITYWEEKLY.NET |

arly in Vacation, as patriarch Rusty Griswold (Ed Helms) tries to fire up his family—wife Debbie (Christina Applegate) and sons James (Skyler Gisondo) and Kevin (Steele Stebbins)—about taking a car trip to the Walley World amusement park just like the one he took with his parents and sister 30 years earlier, James interjects, “I’ve never even heard of the original vacation.” “Doesn’t matter,” Rusty responds; “the new vacation will stand on its own.”

It’s a solid gag in the age of the perpetual-remake/reboot cycle, but writer/directors John Francis Daley and Jonathan M. Goldstein (screenwriters of Horrible Bosses) probably didn’t take into account the age of the perpetual-marketing cycle.

Because anyone who has seen a Warner Bros. movie in the past two months has already heard that joke—and plenty of others in the Vacation trailer—over and over and over again.

Nobody wants to hear a professional film critic gripe about his job, and watching multiple theatrical releases every week is bound to have its downside. But the studio’s attempt to flood the world with ads and trailers—including at promotional screenings attended by media—doesn’t do any favors for a movie built around startled laughter inspired by outrageous jokes. Is it fair to assess a movie relative to the way it’s being sold? Probably not. But that doesn’t help me laugh any more at the movie itself.

The premise, just as it was in the Chevy Chase original, allows for plenty of jokes built around the tension and claustrophobia of long family road trips. As the Griswolds head from Chicago to California in a rented Albanian car, Rusty and Debbie confront the possibility that their marriage is grow-

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38 | JULY 30, 2015

CINEMA CLIPS

MOVIE TIMES AND LOCATIONS AT CITYWEEKLY.NET

NEW THIS WEEK Information is correct at press time. Film release schedules are subject to change.

BATKID BEGINS [not reviewed] Documentary about the viral story of a sick boy who got his wish to be super-hero for a day. Opens July 31 at Megaplex South Jordan. (PG) INFINITELY POLAR BEAR B.5 Surely you’ll agree that it is very adorable when a man with a bipolar disorder refuses to take his medication or stop drinking, thus jeopardizing his own health and the well-being of his children. If you’re not charmed by that scenario, then this movie is not for you.

Maya Forbes’ precious Sundance 2014 pabulum—the title comes from a kid’s malaprop of “bipolar disorder”—stars Mark Ruffalo as Cameron, an eccentric bohemian who, in 1978, must care for his daughters (Imogene Wolodarsky and Ashley Aufderheide) while

his wife (Zoe Saldana) goes to business school; the film flirts briefly with examining ’70s gender roles, then doesn’t follow through. The kids, accustomed to his nonsense, are embarrassed by their squalid apartment and Dad’s loony adventures, but golly, they sure love him.

To viewers, his manic friendliness and peripatetic train of thought can be amusing, but his stubbornness is infuriating: Take your meds! Quit drinking! Get a hold of yourself, man! When it’s over, Cameron hasn’t grown or changed; if anything, the lesson is that the others should as free-spirited as he is. No thank you, generic indie twaddle. Opens July 31 at Broadway Centre Cinemas. (R)—Eric D. Snider A LEGO BRICKUMENTARY BB How awesome are Lego bricks, right? I mean, aren’t they the best? If you have even the slightest doubt as to their transcendent superduperness, this feature-length infomercial is determined to pound it out of you with a Lego hammer. A Minifigure voiced by Jason Bateman narrates this fast-paced, wide-ranging celebration of the colorful little bricks, from their origins in Denmark right through their prominent role in last year’s hit The Lego Movie. And directors Kief Davidson and Daniel Junge do find a few solid points of interest, including the company’s near-collapse in the early 2000s and the various fan subcultures that have emerged. But ultimately it’s hard to shake the sense that this movie exists primarily to celebrate how amazing Lego bricks are: They’re influencing architectural design! Engineers use them to design spacecraft! They cure autism (I’m exaggerating here, but not by a ton)!

Sure, it’s cute seeing both amateur and professional designers make cool things out of Lego bricks. There just isn’t much of an actual movie here beneath all the shiny, perky prelude to hoping you’ll go out and buy a bunch of them. Opens July 31 at Tower Theatre. (G)—Scott Renshaw MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE—ROGUE NATION BBB.5 Like the James Bond films, the entries in the Mission: Impossible series are really only as good as the sum of their set pieces—and they might actually have become more reliably thrilling. Tom Cruise reunites with his Jack Reacher director Christopher McQuarrie, as Ethan Hunt and his team (Simon Pegg, Jeremy Renner and Ving Rhames) work to take down a vast terrorist network, assisted by a deep-cover British agent (Rebecca Ferguson, kicking enough unholy ass to shoot to the top of any casting list for future superhero movies). Beyond grim determination, Ethan Hunt still barely exists as a character after five movies—virtually all the personality is left to Pegg, with Sean Harris reasonably effective as the ultra-confident villain—but it doesn’t matter much when the action beats are this strong. Between a fistfight on the lighting rigs of the Vienna Opera, an underwater race against diminishing oxygen supply and a motorcycle chase through the streets of Casablanca—as well as giving Ethan his strongest female counterpart yet—this installment does nothing to dim the hope that the franchise can keep rolling. Your move, 007. Opens July 31 at theaters valleywide. (PG-13)—SR THE STANFORD PRISON EXPERIMENT BBB A laser focus on the titular, infamous 1971 incident—in which psychologist Dr. Philip Zimbardo (Billy Crudup) recruited students to serve as guards and inmates in a simulated prison in the basement of Stanford University’s psychology department—keeps this dark drama intriguing even when it gets too obvious in its nudges at 21stcentury events. Director Kyle Patrick Alvarez doesn’t waste time establishing who these 18 young men were before they were randomly assigned either of the two roles, a savvy choice given the experiment’s entire premise that their behavior had little to do with background.

And it’s harrowing watching how quickly the participants become emotionally invested either in asserting control (Michael Angarano as the alpha guard) or pushing back against that control (Ezra Miller as the most volatile prisoner); Sundance audience members audibly reacted when the “Day 2” title card appeared, realizing how quickly the situation destabilized. There’s some unfortunate pointless business involving Zimbardo’s colleague/girlfriend (Olivia Thirlby)

becoming the conscience of the experiment, and Alvarez isn’t subtle about turning the story into an Abu Ghraib metaphor. Yet it certainly captures how power corrupts—and not just those wielding the power.

Opens July 31 at Broadway Centre Cinemas. (R)—SR

TANGERINE BBB Sporting innovations that are both welcome (a story about transgender characters, played by actual transgender performers) and potentially worrisome (it was shot entirely on tricked-out iPhones), this ridiculously kinetic Sundance blast delivers enough spillover juice to light Los Angeles for a year. Director Sean Baker’s film finds friends SinDee (Kitana Kiki Rodriguez) and Alexandra (Mya Taylor) reuniting on Christmas Eve. After the accidental revelation that Sin-Dee’s boyfriend/pimp has taken up with a cisgender woman, she starts stomping toward the offending “fish” with a hilarious single-mindedness that puts the demon in It Follows to shame. As the more levelheaded Alexandra gives chase, a love-struck cabbie (Karren Karagulian) gets drawn into the whirlwind. Potential viewers can be forgiven for some skepticism toward the heavily publicized reliance on camera phones, but the filmmakers brilliantly make their limitations work for them, concocting a delirious glow that captures the nuclear-hued aura of Los Angeles in a way few movies can. Even if the energy does diminish some in the last 20 minutes, a final lovely gesture between the two terrific leads ensures that Tangerine’s wonderfully unstable molecules persist. After the credits roll, the dizzy crackle remains. Opens July 31 at Broadway Centre Cinemas. (NR)—Andrew Wright VACATION BB.5 See review p. 37. Opens July 29 at theaters valleywide. (PG-13)

SPECIAL SCREENINGS AFRICAN CATS At Main Library, Aug. 1, 11 a.m. (G) DOWNWINDERS [WORK-IN-PROGRESS SCREENING] See Essentials p. 22. At Main Library, Aug. 4, 7 p.m. (NR)

STAR TREK IV: THE VOYAGE HOME At Tower Theatre, July 31-Aug. 1 @ 11 p.m. & Aug. 2 @ noon. (PG)

CURRENT RELEASES

ANT-MAN BBB We’ve grown accustomed to the apocalyptic stakes of modern blockbusters—and part of what makes this adventure refreshing is that it finds fun in small-scale action. Recently paroled burglar Scott Lang (Paul Rudd) is recruited by scientist Hank Pym (Michael Douglas) to wear a high-tech suit that can shrink him to insect size and help thwart the hawkish plans of Pym’s protégé (Corey Stoll). There’s plenty of parental/surrogate-parental angst in an attempt to find an emotional center, and it all feels like background noise, despite Rudd’s charms.

But the set-pieces are full of simple pleasures, combining the slickness of a heist thriller with special-effects-driven fisticuffs in the most playful comic-book story since Sam Raimi’s Spider-Man films. AntMan reminds us that you can still have a blast at the movies, even when a life-or-death fight can be contained inside a briefcase. (PG-13)—SR

MR. HOLMES BBB Many Hollywood movies are built around a star playing a pop-culture character, and there are far worse things than “Sir Ian McKellen as Sherlock Holmes.” This adaptation of a Mitch Cullin novel weaves between three timelines: in 1947, where an increasingly dementiaaffected Holmes lives with his widowed housekeeper (Laura Linney) and her young son; on a trip to Japan to find a folk remedy for his memory lapses; and 30 years earlier, as Holmes takes his final case. The mystery of that case is never particularly fascinating, and director Bill Condon proves simply functional at keeping chronological balls in the air. Mostly, it’s about the pleasure of watching McKellen’s performance, subtly

CLIPS

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of NEW for 2015 Picks from all 19 Counties in Utah & The Best of State Street

UNEXPECTED BBB Overwritten in places and dramatically slight, Kris Swanberg’s film is nonetheless a charming tale of the friendship that develop between a white high school teacher (Cobie Smulders) and her black student (Gail Bean) when they both become pregnant. It feels for almost its entire running time as if it’s on the brink of becoming a White Savior movie, yet never does; Swanberg and co-writer Megan Mercier see the issue coming, and address it. Instead, they’ve written a movie about pregnancy where the heroines are neither supermommies nor trainwrecks, but normal human beings. The performances by Smulders and Bean are charming and harmonious with each other, and the casting of Elizabeth McGovern as Smulders’ mother is uncanny in their resemblance. It may not be a masterpiece, but its heart is in the right place, and that’s wholly sufficient. (NR)—Danny Bowes

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PIXELS B.5 No matter the premise, you can count on Adam Sander and his movie-making crew taking the laziest approach imaginable. Here they expand on Patrick Jean’s short film, as 1980s video-game prodigies (Sandler, Josh Gad and Peter Dinklage) are called on by the President (Kevin James—wait, what?) to save the world when aliens invade in the form of vintage video-game characters. The supporting cast and some of the visual concepts providing a tiny spark of imagination in this mutant spawn of GalaxyQuest and Ghostbusters. But mostly this is a messy, confused attempt to make a movie for 10-year-olds built

SOUTHPAW BBB It starts in a place that seems counterintuitive, with scrappy, up-fromthe-wrong-side-of-the-tracks Billy Hope (Jake Gyllenhaal) already the undefeated light-heavyweight champion, happily married with a daughter and living a dream life. But a tragedy shakes up Billy’s life, and Southpaw turns into a story of someone who has to be broken down in order to build himself back up the right way. Structurally, there’s a battle here between familiar sports drama—with its grizzled old trainer (Forest Whitaker) and buildup to The Big Fight—and unique character arc. Gyllenhaal, though, finds a reservoir of intensity for a tricky role showing the residual psychic damage of a life dependent on never backing down from a challenge, even if there are always consequences.

Ultimately, it’s not about whether Billy becomes a better fighter; it’s about finding out whether he becomes a better man. (R)—SR

!

PAPER TOWNS BBB.5 John Green (The Fault in Our Stars) may be the hottest thing in young-adult fiction, but it’s not because he’s relying on a formula.

Nat Wolff plays Quentin, a by-the-book high school senior who spends one wild night with classmate/neighbor/long-time crush Margo (Cara Delevingne) before she suddenly disappears. Along to help solve the mystery are Quentin’s equally nerdy best friends (Austin Abrams and Justice Smith), and the terrific chemistry between the actors builds the idea that this is far more bro-mance than a romance. Even Margo’s status as Manic Pixie Dream Girl™ gets turned sideways through an acknowledgement of the reason-clouding big emotions of youth. Those prone to rolling their eyes at adolescent epiphanies may find nothing new in the carpe diem sentiments, but this funny, frisky teen narrative makes the simple pleasures of friendship as profound as True Love.

(PG-13)—SR

ber

affecting at conveying a man famed for his dazzling mind trying to cope with its deterioration. A sometimes over-plotted story works even if it’s mostly about that one casting pitch. (PG-13)—SR

N n o i v g em n i m 26th

entirely on Gen X nostalgia. Anything that could have been fun about turning nerds who peaked in pre-pubescence into heroes is lost in a movie where the most creative idea was, “What would it look like if Q*bert pissed himself?” (PG-13)—SR

Co

CINEMA

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0 | JULY 30, 2015

TRUE

BY B I L L F RO S T @bill_frost

TV

Bitchin’ Choice Wastoid

Hot Hot Heat

Wet Hot American Summer takes it back to the ’80s; Strike Back returns for a blowout.

Wet Hot American Summer Friday, July 31 (Netflix)

Series Debut: You either loved 2001 cult flick Wet Hot American Summer or hated it—or liked the first half and meh-ed the second; opinions vary wildly. The new eight-episode Netflix “prequel,” subtitled First Day of Camp, reassembles the original cast (Paul Rudd, Janeane Garofalo, David Hyde Pierce, Christopher Meloni, Michael Ian Black, Elizabeth Banks, Amy Poehler and Bradley Cooper), adds some up-for-silliness extras (Jon Hamm, John Slattery, Lake Bell, Chris Pine, Jason Schwartzman, Kristen Wiig and Josh Charles), and rips into ’80s summer-camp movies anew (so there was Meatballs and … what?). Sure, everyone’s now even more too-old for these roles—that’s part of the joke. Or the entire joke. Either way: Ant-Man in short-shorts!

Strike Back Friday, July 31 (Cinemax)

Season Premiere: Before Banshee put Cinemax on the map as a viable home for non-soft-porn original programming, international military actioner Strike Back was blowing up everything in sight like a Team America: World Police sequel without all the puppets and plot. Now, after two years off, the series returns for its fifth and final season with a singular mission: Kill Hitler! (Actually, that’s Danger 5—which you should absolutely be watching on Netflix.) As for blackops badasses Scott (Sullivan Stapleton) and Stonebridge (Philip Winchester), it’s apparently time to Strike Back against North Korea, the last place on earth where they haven’t yet wiped out 60 percent of the population, Call of Grand Theft Duty-style. So long, Strike Back; from now on, we’ll have to get our ultra-violence from, well, Banshee.

Bachelor in Paradise Sunday, Aug. 2 (ABC)

Season Premiere: I get the purpose of The Bachelor and The Bachelorette—but Bachelor in Paradise? Losers from previous seasons of both shows go to Mexico and exchange STDs? While avoiding elimination and “looking for love”?

ABC canceled the similar-but-less-exotic Bachelor Pad after

three seasons, and it’s likely they’ll do the same to Bachelor in Paradise eventually, so I’ve prepared pitches for the following concepts should any Bachelor/Bachelorette producers be in a buying mood: Bachelor Jail, Bachelor in Space, Bachelor in Escrow, Bachelor S&M Dungeon, Bachelorette Raft, Bachelor Preppers, Bachelor in a Doomsday Cult, Bachelorette Ghost Hunters, Bachelor in a Tiny House, Bachelorettes Locked Up Abroad, Bachelors Finding Bigfoot and Let’s Hunt Chris Harrison Like Human Prey. Have your people call my people.

Significant Mother Monday, Aug. 3 (The CW)

Series Debut: Shows originally developed for The CW’s “digital studio” seed tend to, in tech terms, suck. Significant Mother sucks less than previous output, but it’s not quite worth a 10-episode series: Portland dude Nate (Josh Zuckerman) is shocked to learn that his love-’em-leave-’em BFF/roommate Jimmy’s (Nathaniel Buzolic) latest conquest is Nate’s own recently separated mother (Krista Allen—where ya been?).

How do you get 10 weeks out of that? Add Jonathan Silverman (kids, Wiki Weekend at Bernie’s) as Nate’s dad who’s determined to win Mom back. Still, nice to see Krista Allen again, though she’d be much better off as a guest on …

Playing House Tuesday, Aug. 4 (USA)

Season Premiere: Jessica St. Clair and Lennon Parham’s cozy comedy about almost-uncomfortably close girlfriends and a soon-to-arrive baby barely survived to see a second season on USA, a cable net that’s yet to figure out what to

Wet Hot American Summer (Netflix)

do with smart half-hour sitcoms (R.I.P. Sirens, Benched).

Which means this summer could be your last chance to see Playing House, a genuinely funny and sweet comedy that deserves another shot somewhere else … I never thought I’d be saying this, but … go to TV Land. They get it—just ask Jim Gaffigan.

Mr. Robinson, The Carmichael Show Wednesday, Aug. 5 (NBC)

Series Debuts: With only two half-hour sitcoms on its upcoming fall schedule, it’s all-too-apparent that NBC has given up on comedy—but first, they have some factory seconds to blow out. Mr. Robinson (starring Craig Robinson) and The Carmichael Show (starring Jerrod Carmichael— no time was wasted titling the shows, obviously) are both summer fillers designed to disappear after their six-week runs and make way for NBC’s all-drama-almost-all-thetime slate; after that, you’ll never see ’em again. Which is too bad, because, despite their annoying laugh-tracked formats (still a thing in 2015—why?!), both are headed up by funny dudes who could easily make these comedies fly elsewhere (dammit, I’m going to invoke TV Land again.

What have I become?!). Best of luck in future endeavors, Craig and Jerrod. CW

Listen to Bill on Mondays at 8 a.m. on X96 Radio From Hell; weekly on the TV Tan podcast via iTunes and Stitcher.

Provo Music Primer

BY COURT MANN comments@cityweekly.net @TheCourtMann

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Part 1 of the Provo Music Primer ran in the July 23 edition of City Weekly. Court Mann is a features reporter for the Daily Herald in Provo.

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covery, and replace it with a spiritual, religious, hyper-reflective one, and that sense of personal discovery becomes significantly more purposeful and articulate. That’s not to imply the music scene is all just brooding, guilt-ridden Mormons, or that substances can’t facilitate great music. But the scene’s musicians all exist in a larger community that exercises intense self-reflection—and that kind of self-reflection is key to compelling artistic creation.

Once again, given these circumstances, it would be strange if the scene weren’t producing good music.

Throw in Utah Valley’s ultra-entrepreneurial, venture-friendly atmosphere—of which the music scene is certainly a sector—and it has created a pretty unique cocktail.

When outsiders perceive the Provo music scene as novel, their assessment isn’t totally wrong; it’s just incomplete. Taken collectively, the aforementioned factors that breed Provo’s music scene are somewhat novel. The fact that a scene exists within those factors is not.

These elements indicate that the music scene is more reflective than reactive. People tend to view music scenes as counterculture, but most of Provo’s is born from the same elements that make Provo tick.

I imagine it’s becoming harder for the scene to collectively view itself as different/separate when it’s been embraced the way it has the past couple of years. This embrace has happened simultaneously with the scene’s recent drought in major label attention—at least a drought compared to the downpour of the previous few years, when artists such as Joshua James suddenly found themselves the subject of national media attention. Basically, the scene’s defining characteristics—its separateness from Provo culture and its ongoing national success—don’t quite resemble their former selves. Its new identity resides elsewhere.

The scene, and what’s happening within it, is a reflection of what’s happening throughout most of Provo, in that it’s changing, growing and diversifying, becoming a more multifaceted force within the state, region and nation. That’s something Provo musicians should want to be a part of. It’s a relatable, somewhat definitive theme for Utahns. The scene’s music is an interesting medium through which to view, or hear, this theme play out.

The best part is, so much remains unpredictable. Maybe a bunch of new Provo musicians will become nationally known within the next two years. Or maybe not. The past two years have been different than most had forecast; why would the next two be predictable? CW

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may be going about this all backward. In Part 1 of this series, I argued the Provo music scene has legitimate cultural and sociological importance—or at least intrigue—and that’s why Salt Lake City audiences should care about it. But maybe that puts the cart before the horse. I didn’t get interested in the scene for those reasons, after all. I got interested because of the music.

The significance of the music scene as some kind of cultural force probably matters far less if it were only producing variations on, say, “Mambo No. 5” (no disrespect to Lou Bega). Whether or not the music is actually good plays a big part.

So, is the music compelling, well-crafted, enjoyable, substantial? Much of it is, absolutely. The reasons why it’s good, and the reasons why it exists, are among the most interesting facets of Provo’s music scene. Truthfully, the scene has blossomed precisely because of Provo and all its idiosyncrasies.

Between Brigham Young University and Utah Valley University, Utah Valley has somewhere around 60,000 young adults—and that’s just the universities. What happens when you put more than 60,000 young adults—most of whom come from religious backgrounds that value music—within a 60-square-mile area? And what if that area generally lacks a party culture and has relatively limited entertainment options? Of course those people are going to make music. Under the circumstances, it would be far stranger if they didn’t.

Of course, a scene needs more than people making music. It needs people performing and supporting it. For years, local venues like Velour Live Music Gallery, Muse Music Café and others provided musicians with a stage, engaged audiences and generated other kinds of support. The venues and those who run them have played an invaluable part in making the scene what it is today; it’s tough to picture it without them. Like any vibrant arts scene, things can get competitive, sensitive and political at times, but the entry point is still decidedly lower than in larger markets.

Whether it’s a downtown venue or a house show, there’s always a place in Provo for musicians to blossom or wither.

Utah Valley’s hyper-religious mindset is critical, and in many ways it shapes both the quantity and quality of music coming out of here. This isn’t acknowledged often enough.

Whether religious or not, young adults are generally trying to find themselves. Take out the partying culture of young self-dis-

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Uncaged

How Utah actor Robyn Kemp became songstress Robyn Cage.

BY TIFFANY FRANDSEN tfrandsen@cityweekly.net @tiffany_mf

U

sually, people move to New York City to chase their dreams—but not Robyn Cage. The native Utahn was living the dream as an actress in New York to move to Park City, Utah, to become a singer. Now, Cage—a classically trained pianist with a clear, operatic voice—sings edgy, alternative-pop songs, about half of which she wrote in the desert of Southern Utah.

After studying at the Boston Conservatory for four years and acting on the stage in New York for five years, Cage serendipitously wrote “Trust You,” (released on the Raining Sideways EP under Robyn Kemp) in response to a call for new talent from a producer in New York. She’d been working at a restaurant, as she did to bridge the financial gap between booking shows. She was getting ready to take a trip home, and a friend offered her a gig while she was in Utah. After talking to him, she was soaking in the sauna at her gym and thought, “Or, I could cancel my return flight, and stay home.”

“I felt completely liberated,” she says. In New York City, she’d been miserable. Desperation followed her to every audition; dread hung near the end of every show she did book. When the idea came to her that she could move, she jumped on it.

“It’s kind of funny that I spent a couple years not loving New York, and it hadn’t really occurred to me at all,” she says. “I think that’s the case for a lot of people; if they’re in a relationship that isn’t healthy, or they’re in a place that isn’t making them happy. …

Sometimes, you’ve got to make changes.”

And so Robyn Kemp became Robyn Cage.

Cage, partly because of the imagery of a caged bird, partly because birdcages are beautiful but a little dark (much like Cage and her music), partly because Robyn Cage sounds badass (again, like Cage and her music) and partly because, well, the domain name was available.

“I wanted to create an alter-ego that was certain aspects of my personality, ampli-

From big city to open sky: the uncaging of Robyn Cage

fied,” Cage says. “Robyn Cage has more of a dark side. I think that came out of my time in New York … I wanted to create this character that feels a little bit otherworldly.”

The decision to be a singer was a natural move. As a kid, growing up in Salt Lake City, she sang often enough that her parents imposed rules: No singing before 8 a.m. or after 10 p.m.; no singing at the table, or in the car or in lines at Lagoon.

Her family spent a lot of time in Southern Utah, and that part of the state has inspired a lot of her writing, including her upcoming album, Born in the Desert. Cage says it’s also metaphorical: “Born in a desert means that I felt like I was born with nothing, artistically. I had to work for everything I got. It didn’t come easily or naturally.”

One of the Southern Utah-born songs, “Theatre Noir,” is one of her most experimental. “On a camping trip to the desert, I wrote all the lyrics, and then I thought, ‘I don’t know what to do with this. Is it a poem? Is it a song?

Is it a performance-art piece?” she says.

The song was inspired by her husband’s willingness to move to Los Angeles with her—which had been the original plan—despite his hatred of the city. “Theater Noir” started as a story of a man who joined the circus to be with the woman he loved. The story morphed; a man disfigured himself so he could join the sideshow to be with her.

It’s theatrical, edgy and backed by two layered pianos (a vintage 1860s Steinway and a toy antique piano with keys missing) to create a jangly, saloon-type sound.

Cage speaks parts—an idea from Stuart Maxfield of The Fictionist, who co-wrote the song. The first time Cage and her band played it live, the audience took to tangoing while they drank from wine glasses. “That’s what the song brings out of people—it’s this weird, celebratory thing,” says Cage.

The lyrics had come to her quickly—much like the decision to leave the East Coast and acting. For the last year she lived in New York, she’d been in crisis, deciding what she wanted to do with her life. “I was in the wrong place, doing the wrong thing with my life and I was in the wrong relationship, and I was at the point where I was willing to throw out everything and start from scratch,” says Cage.

Starting from scratch meant a new venue for self-expression. “That’s what ‘Theatre Noir’ is about. It’s: Be your own freaky self.” CW

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PRHYME WITH ADRIAN YOUNGE, BISHOP NEHRU

“You Should Know,” by the hip-hop duo PRhyme (Royce da 5’9”, DJ Premier) featuring DJ/producer Adrian Younge and singer Dwele, takes aim at crappy, mainstream bling rappers. “Allow me to put some sense on you coons/ Too much success, um, here comes your doom,” says Royce. The reality check comes because so many rappers do what they do for jewels, top-shelf booze and booty. The message is layered over an ethereal beat with sampled brass instruments taken straight from Younge’s own discography, which might serve as a reminder to all those “Yung” rappers: Namely, that they can do better than this. One yungsta who heeds the message is 18-year-old Bishop Nehru, whose “Fickle Mind$” (from the 2013 mixtape Nehruvia) says pretty much the same thing—just with more bravado.

It’s good to see backlash against mainstream hip-hop isn’t purely generational.

Pioneer Park, 350 S. 300 West, 5 p.m., $5 advance/$10 day of show, TwilightConcerts.com

SUNDAY 8.2

SLIGHTLY STOOPID, DIRTY HEADS

Wrap your head around this: San Diego’s Slightly Stoopid released their first album 20 years ago next year. That means that Sublime’s Bradley Nowell, whose Skunk label released the record, has been dead that long.

Where—cough!—does the time go? At the

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time, the group seemed like Sublime Jr., but they’ve more than proved their mettle with their multiply-influenced punk-folk-reggae-blues-dub-ska sound.

They dropped their eighth album, Meanwhile … Back at the Lab (Stoopid Records) last month, and it’s as strong as that stuff you’re puffin’. They’re bringing along the similar, but more hip-hop-minded, Dirty Heads, who’ve been together almost as long. Both bands have amassed loyal followings over the years. Expect the Gallivan Center to be packed tonight. The Gallivan Center, 239 S. Main, 5:30 p.m., $37, TheGallivanCenter.com

MONDAY 8.3 CHICANO BATMAN

Slightly Stoopid

Let’s ponder, for a moment, an actual Chicano Batman.

It sounds weird, but it kinda works: A lowrider Batmobile with hydraulics and explosive dingleballs? A sidekick called Robincito? Come on.

It’s almost better than the real thing. But there’s a serious side to this foursome.

“We’re trying to embody a political movement within our symbol,” singer-guitaristorganist Bardo Martinez says in the documentary Chicano Batman: Not Another Band From East L.A. (see it on YouTube). The idea behind the band, he says, is to blend pop culture with serious ideas— and since the Batman logo and the United Farm Workers’ black eagle symbol are so alike … there you go: Chicano

PRhyme Batman. But how do they sound? Imagine a blend of mid-tempo Latin rhythms from the school of Sergio Mendes, with chicha, which is a blend of cumbia rhythm and surf and psych rock. Can’t imagine that? Well, it’s mellow, smooth and a little trippy, like a Sunday drive in a lowrider with a fat Ziploc riding shotgun. Although these cats are opening for Alabama Shakes tomorrow night at Red Butte Garden, that show is sold out. Good thing they’re coming in a night early for this show. Urban Lounge, 241 S. 500 East, 8 p.m., $8, TheUrbanLoungeSLC.com »

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In the early ‘90s—and for a long time afterward, you couldn’t go anywhere without hearing the Soul Asylum track “Runaway Train.” The wistful track, which was far from the rollicking Minneapolitan punk rock that got them their major-label deal in the first place, was played to death. This, while superior singles from the same album—like the intense, cathartic, anthemic “Somebody to Shove”—faded away. Oh, well. It’s the way it goes. The good news is the band stuck around, even after losing founding bassist Kurt Mueller to cancer in 2005, and another founding member, guitarist Dan Murphy, to the quiet life in 2012. Arizona punk legends Meat Puppets have a similar story. The highly influential band, who famously joined Nirvana for their 1993 MTV Unplugged appearance and a moderate hit (“Backwater”), weathered its share of setbacks—mostly drug-related, although bassist Cris Kirkwood did time in the Arizona state pen for beating a post-office security guard with his own baton in 2003. But they reunited and rallied to release four more albums that—while not as urgent and fearless as their earlier work—are still solid.

The chance to see them both on the same stage is a gift. Sky, 149 Pierpont Ave., 9 p.m., $20 in advance/$25 day of show, SkySLC.com

VIP TABLE RESERVATIONS 216.375.4684 • TIX AVAILABLE AT SKYSLC.COM 149 PIERPONT AVE • DOWNTOWN SLC +21

Grace Potter

GRACE POTTER

When Grace Potter & The Nocturnals exploded forth in 2005 with Nothing But the Water (Hollywood), jaws dropped. The band’s fresh take on the classic-rocky end of the jam-band sound, along with Potter’s ace songwriting and spunky live persona (she rocks a Flying V guitar!) made GP&TN an instant hit. They released three more albums together, including 2012’s The Lion the Beast the Beat—not one of them a stinker, and each charted higher than the other. You can credit that to Potter and her band’s aforementioned talents—but one wonders if maybe it was because of a slow-creeping commercialism that began to infuse her songs. Danceable beats, collaborations with Kenny Chesney … all potentially terrifying.

But she also co-wrote three songs with The Black Keys’ Dan Auerbach, and dueted with Willie Nelson. Nothing to worry about, right? Well, “Alive Tonight,” the first single from her forthcoming solo album Midnight (Hollywood), has everything we love about Potter—but the shout-y chorus is more Katy Perry than Grace Potter. Another sneakpeek track, “Look What We’ve Become” is likewise commercial. Although her moxie is intact, and the songs are still pretty good, Grace Potter through a pop filter is a bit of a disappointment—if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. Even so, you should see this show. Pop or not, Potter is a force. Deer Valley Resort’s Snow Park Outdoor Amphitheater, 2250 S. Deer Valley Drive, Park City, 7 p.m., $40-$75, DeerValley.com

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Sept 1: Babes In Toyland Sept 2: Crooks On Tape Sept 3: Shuggie Otis Free before 11 & $3 After Sept 5: UZ Aug 15: Erasole James Sept 10: La Luz Album Release Sept 11: Old 97s Aug 17: Locrian Sept 12: Bowling For Soup Aug 18: KMFDM Sept 13: Dam Funk Aug 19: FREE SHOW Kaleb Sept 14: Dirty Fences Hanly Sept 16: Eligh & DeMatlaS Aug 20: FREE SHOW Mimi Sept 18: Quiet Oaks Album Knowles Release Aug 21: Shiba San Sept 20: The Vibrators Aug 22: Burnell Washburn Sept 21: Shilpa Ray Aug 24: FREE SHOW Sept 22: Ken MOde Summer Cannibals Sept 23: Uncle Acid & The Aug 26: AJ Davila Deadbeats Aug 27: FREE SHOW Matty Mo Aug 28: Chelsea Wolfe Aug 29: The Get Up Kids Aug 30: Melvins Aug 31: Millencollin

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JULY 30, 2015 | 49

PROGRESSIVE CASH PAYOUT!!!

ARRIVE EARLY FOR SEAT & CARDS

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SHAKE ASS!

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FRIDAY, JULY 31ST

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Thursdays

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50 | JULY 30, 2015

FRIDAY JULY 31

STURGIS 75th, FEATURING THE FRYED BROTHERS BAND

Ever wanted to quit your job and be a biker? The Barbary Coast is celebrating the 75th anniversary of the Sturgis Motorcycle Rally in South Dakota by calling in The Fryed Brothers Band— the Led Zeppelin of biker bands. They’ve played their roadhouse rock & roll with everyone from Willie Nelson to Billy Idol, so you know they’re legit. The morning after this party—which also features Captain Jack & The Stray Dogs, and food by Smoke A’Billy BBQ Grill—you can ride with the Fryeds to Vernal (for a show at Little B’s) and from there to Sturgis. Sign in starts at 10 a.m. Showing up to work on Monday is up to you. (Randy Harward) Barbary Coast, 4242 S. State, 6 p.m., $10 advance/$12 day of show

THURSDAY 7.30 LIVE MUSIC

Esperanza Spalding, Perla Batalla, Anna Wilson (Deer Valley Snow Park Outdoor Amphitheater) Fall Out Boy, Wiz Khalifa, DJ Hoodie Allen, DJ Drama (USANA Amphitheatre) Myon, Shane 54 (Sky) Morgan Snow (The Hog Wollow Pub) Painte (The Cabin) PRhyme with Adrian Younge, Bishop Nehru (Pioneer Park, see p. 44) Quiet Oaks, The Hoot Hoots (O.P. Rockwell) Robert Earl Keen (The State Room) Sin Circus (The Loading Dock) Taylor Berrett (Velour) The Twin Flames (The Spur Bar and Grill) Wood & Wire (Newpark Town Center)

OPEN MIC & JAM

Jazz Jam Session (Sugarhouse Coffee) Jazz Joint w/ Mark Chaney, the Garage All Stars (Garage on Beck) Open Mic Night (Legends Billiards Club)

DJ

Antidote: Hot Noise (The Red Door) Matty Mo, DJ Elliot Estes (Urban Lounge)

KARAOKE

Karaoke (A Bar Named Sue) Karaoke (A Bar Named Sue on State) Karaoke (Habit’s)

Karaoke (Willie’s Lounge) Ogden Unplugged feat. Adam Kozlewski (Lighthouse Lounge) Open Mic Night Hosted by Once the Lion (Legends Billiards Club)

FRIDAY 7.31 LIVE MUSIC

Babylon The Resurection (Sky Lounge) Bermuda, 2x4, The Prestige (The Loading Dock) Better Taste Bureau, Mouse Powell, Apt, Chuck Noland, DJ Scratchmo (Kilby Court) Brett Knickerbocker (Poplar Street Pub) Brother Chunky (O.P. Rockwell) BSuitz (The Woodshed) Cory Mon (Snowbird Resort) Foreign Figures, Night Argent, The Lovestrange (Velour) Fryed Brothers Band (Barbary Coast) Jack Wilkinson, Jack Wilde (The Woodshed) John Batdorf (Bountiful City Park) Johnny Slaughter (Garage on Beck) King Niko, The Perks, Unseen Patrol, Melo (The Royal) Kyau, Albert (Area 51) MadChild, gLife (Liquid Joes) Max Pain & the Groovies, Breakers, Heavy Dose, Daisy & the Moonshines (Urban Lounge) Rick Gerber & the Night Caps (The Hog Wallow Pub) Pierce the Veil, Senses Fail, We Came as

17 TV'S INCLUDING 3 - 150" BIG SCREENS

MONDAY

TUESDAY

WEDNESDAY

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FRIDAY

SATURDAY

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801-566-4653 7078 SOUTH REDWOOD RD. WEST JORDAN

THURSDAY

SUNDAY

NO

jazz brunch:

all-you-can-eat lunch buffet $8.95 12-3PM comedy open mic night free 7PM free live band karaoke w/this is your band 9pm-12am thirsty thursday all pints $2

12pm-3PM new menu & brunch specials $4 bloody mary & $3 mimosas

FRIDAY

MONDAY

the mark chaney trio

free appy hour 5-6PM free line dance lessons 7-8:30PM

margarita & mai tai monday $3

LIVE BAND

taco tuesday 2 for $2 texas tea $4 free karaoke w/ zimzam ent & progressive jackpot 8pm

STARTS @ POT OVER 9PM

TUESDAY

reaction

Friday, July 31ST & SATURDAY, August 1ST

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MONDAY– SATURDAY CLOSED SUNDAY

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SATURDAY

AUG. 1ST · 9PM

GREEN RIVER BLUES SUNDAY & THURSDAY

WASATCH POKER TOUR @ 8PM BONUS GAME SAT @ 2PM

• OGDEN 2822 WALL AVE: 621-0086

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PAYMENT 90 DAY OPTION

• OREM 1680 N. STATE: 226-6090

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MODEL CLOSE-OUTS, DISCONTINUED ITEMS AND SOME SPECIALS ARE LIMITED TO STOCK ON HAND AND MAY INCLUDE DEMOS. PRICES GUARANTEED THRU 08/1/15

Bakers Small Batch • Basil Hayden’s • Blanton’s Bourbon • Bookers • Buffalo Trace • Bulliet • Bulliet 10yr • Eagle Rare 17yr • Eagle Rare Single Barrel • Elijah Craig Barrel Proof • Four Roses Single Barrel • Four Roses Small Batch • George T Stagg • Henry De Yore • Hudson Baby Bourbon • Jim Beam • Kentucky Vintage • Knob Creek Single Barrel • Koval Bourbon • Koval Four Grain • Koval Millet • Koval Oat• Makers 46 • Makers Mark • Medley Bros. • Old Forester Birthday • Old Forester Signature • Parker’s Promise of Hope • Ridgemont 1792 • Stagg Jr. • Stranahans Single Malt • Sugarhouse Whiskey • Tin Cup • Wathen’s • Westland Single Malt • Wild Turkey 101 • Wild Turkey Diamond Anniversary • Willett Pot Still Reserve • Willett XCF • Woodford Classic Malt • Woodford Double Oaked • Woodford Pinot Barrel Finish • Woodford Reserve • Woodford Straight Malt • Bulliet Rye • EH Taylor Straight Rye • EH Taylor Small Batch • Highwest American Prairie Reserve • Highwest Campfire • Highwest Double Rye • Highwest OMG Rye • Highwest Rendezvous Rye • Highwest Silver Western Oat • Highwest Son of Bourye • Hudson New York Corn • Hudson Manhattan Rye • Jack Daniels • Jack Daniels Fire • Jack Daniels Honey Jack Daniels Unaged Rye • Knob Creek Rye • Koval Rye • Rittenhouse Rye • Rogue Chatoe Single Malt • Rogue Dead Guy Whiskey • Sazerac Rye 18yr • Sazerac Rye 6yr • Thomas Handy Rye • Wild Turkey Forgiven • Wild Turkey Rye • Wild Turkey Rye 101 • Willet Family Bottled Rye • Aberlour 16yr • Ardbeg • Balvenie 12yr • Balvenie 21yr Portwood • Dewars • Glenfiddich 18yr • Glenfiddich The Original • Glenlivet 12yr • Glenlivet 15yr • Glenlivet 16yr • Glenlivet 18yr • Johnnie Walker Black • Johnnie Walker Red • Laphroaig 10 yr • Laphroaig 18 yr • Macallan 12yr • Speyburn 10yr • The Dalmore 12yr • Tomintoul • Bushmills • Jameson • Jameson 12yr • Jameson 18yr • Jameson Black Barrel Reserve • Jameson Gold • Jameson Vintage Reserve • Knappogue 12yr • Knappogue 16yr • Midleton Very Rare • Red Breast 21yr • Red Breast 15yr • Red Breast 12yr • Tullamore • Hakushu 12yr • Hibiki 12 yr.

• Yamazaki 12yr. • Yamazaki 18yr • Crown Royal • Crown Reserve • Forty Creek • Legacy • Pendleton • Pendelton 12yr Rye

“Too much of anything is bad, but too much good whiskey is barely enough” ~Mark Twain 19 East 200 South | bourbonhouseslc.com

JULY 30, 2015 | 51

W W W. S O U N DWA R E H O U S E U TA H .C O M

HOURS

SLC 2763 S. STATE: 485-0070

KARAOKE STARTS @ 9PM

W/DJ MARL COLOGNE

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WEDNESDAY

DJ RUDE BOY BAD BOY BRIAN

COAXIAL SPEAKERS WITH LIGHTUP GRILLS AND WIRELESS RF REMOTE

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PAJAMA PARTY & CONTEST w/ Reaction. SEXIEST PJ’S WINS

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WEDNESDAY

august 1ST

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FRIDAY

MONDAY

FREE TO PLAY

$

CONCERTS & CLUBS

FRIDAY, JULY 31 MADCHILD

The poisonously violent-rhyme-spitting Madchild, of the Canadian rap group Swollen Members, is touring with another solo album, Silver Tongue Devil (Battle Axe). Get ready for things to get a little deep and autobiographical: It’s about his battle with addiction (in 2012, he told HipHopDX.com that he wasted $3 million on drugs) and struggle against other personal devils. But he’s still the maniac Madchild; his rhymes are also insanely misogynistic and hedonistically—and kind of gratuitously—violent, and backed up by beautiful and dark piano hooks. His performance is tight, and full of just as much madness as before he was sober. Stay safe Friday night, Battle Axe Warriors. (Tiffany Frandsen) Liquid Joes, 1249 E. 3300 South, 8 p.m., $15 advance, $20 day of show, LiquidJoes.net

The

Westerner

52 | JULY 30, 2015

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COUNTRY DANCE HALL, BAR & GRILL

moonshine bandits

Friday, august 14 doors @ 5pm $10

An Eclectic mix of olde world charm and frontier saloon

LIVE music

Spirits • Food • Live Music

JULY 31 & Aug 1

Mark Owens

7.30 Morgan Snow

8.05 Shane Scheib

7.31 Rick Gerber & the

8.06 The Talbot Brothers

Night Caps

8.07 Los Hellcaminos

8.01 Phoenix Rising

8.08 You Topple Over

wednesdays

STEIN WEDNESDAYS FREE LINE DANCING LESSONS · 7PM · NO COVER

thursdays

FREE WALTZ DANCE LESSONS 7PM · NO COVER

fridays

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IN TOWN Open at 11am Saturday & Sunday Bloody Marys & Mimosas

3200 Big Cottonwood Rd. 801.733.5567 | theHogWallow.com

200

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LADIES’ NIGHT NO COVER FOR LADIES

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BIKINI BULL RIDING

CASH PRIZE! FREE TO ENTER!

COMPETITION

saturdays

LIVE MUSIC

NO COVER BEFORE 8PM

ARRIVE EARLY! FREE TABLE RESERVATIONS

FREE MECHANICAL BULL RIDES • FREE POOL • FREE KARAOKE • PATIO FIRE PITS

www.we ste r n e r s lc .c om

3360 S. REDWOOD RD. • 801-972-5447 • WED-SAT 6PM-2AM

Romans (Utah State Fairpark) Pop Evil, Red Sun Rising, First Decree, Spite of War (The Complex) Talia Keys, Brian Ernst, Grits Green (The State Room) Taylor Hicks (Draper Amphitheater) Transit Cast and Friends (Fats Grill) Where My Bones Rest Easy (Diabolical Records) Whistling Rufus (Sugarhouse Coffee)

DJ

DJ Choice (The Red Door) DJ Night (Outlaw Saloon) DJ Scotty B (Habits) Maddix (Moose Lounge)

KARAOKE

Karaoke (Willie’s Lounge)

SATURDAY 8.1 LIVE MUSIC

10,000 Maniacs (Canyons Resort) A.A. Bondy, Will Sartain (Urban Lounge) Cool Air Concert Series (Snowbird Resort) Hooten Hallers (Garage on Beck)

Imagine (Ed Kenley Amphitheater) Joy Spring Band (Jazz) (Sugarhouse Coffee) June Brothers (Sprague Library) My Private Island, Ash of August, The Animals Know (The Royal) Phoenix, (The Hog Wallow Pub) Phora, Eskupe, Anthro, Billionaire Buck (The Complex) Salazar, Jaren Jolley, Angel Magic, The Mckeon Sisters (Velour) Tallgrass (The Cabin at Kimball Arts Festival) Teresa Eggertsen (Snowbird Resort) Sly, Nas T (Fats Grill) Winchester, Panther Milk (Kilby Court)

KARAOKE

Karaoke (Willie’s Lounge)

MONDAY 8.3

SUNDAY 8.2

LIVE MUSIC

DJ

KARAOKE

Chaseone2 (Gracie’s) DJ Battleship (Brewskis) DJ CellyCel (Sandy Station) DJ Marshall Aaron (Sky) DJ Night (Outlaw Saloon) DJ Scooter & DJ Jpan (Downstairs Park City) DJ Scotty B (Habits) Elvis Freshly (Cisero’s) Timmy Trumpet (Park City Live)

The Ballroom Thieves, Darlingside (Snowbasin) The Kings Of 88 (O.P. Rockwell) Kutt Calhoun, Ghostcrew (Metro Bar) Slightly Stoopid, Dirty Heads & Stick Figure (Gallivan Center, see p. 44) Reverie, Sahtyre, Severe, Babii Criss (Uprok) Entourage Karaoke (Piper Down) Karaoka Bingo (The Tavernacle) Karaoke That Doesn’t Suck (The Woodshed) KJ Sparetire (The Century Club) Sunday Funday Karaoke (Three Alarm Saloon)

DJ

DJ Street Jesus (Bourbon House) DJ Matty Mo (Downstairs) DJ Kemosabe (O.P. Rockwell)

OPEN MIC & JAM

Open Blues Jam (The Green Pig Pub)

TUESDAY 8.4 LIVE MUSIC

Alabama Shakes, Chicano Batman (Red Butte Garden) Billy Mickelson (The Woodshed) Grace Potter (Deer Valley Snow Park Outdoor Amphitheater, see p. 46) Icarus The Owl (The Loading Dock) Iamtheshotgun, One Among the Horde, DiseNgaged, Bleeding Crown (The Loading Dock)

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FRIDAY, JULY 31ST OPENING BAND: CAPTAIN JACK + THE STRAY DOGS @ 7PM

TICKETS @ SMITHSTIX OR BARBARY COAST

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The Fryed Brothers Band

OUTDOOR SHOW

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GATES OPEN 6PM

ENTERTAINMENT BY:

LIVE MUSIC

Amanda X, The Spirit of the Beehive, Secret Alibies (Kilby Court) Chicano Batman, Tony Holiday (Urban Lounge, see p. 44) Satanarchist, Moon of Delirium (Metro Bar)

RUN | CONCERT | PARTY & BBQ PRESENTED BY LIL B’S, LAW TIGER’S & BARBARY COAST

801-265-9889

RIDE WITH THE FRYED’S RIDE GOES FROM SACRAMENTO TO SALT LAKE CITY, THEN TO VERNAL & ON TO STURGIS

JULY 30, 2015 | 53

4242 S. STATE

GIFT CERTIFICATES AVAILABLE at

CONCERTS & CLUBS CHECK OUT PHOTOS FROM...

7 . 26 P A R K SILLY

KARAOKE

Karaoke (Keys on Main) Karaoke (Brewskis) Karaoke That Doesn’t Suck (The Woodshed) Karaoke With ZimZam (Club 90) Taboo Tuesday Karaoke (Three Alarm Saloon)

OPEN MIC & JAM Open Mic (The Royal) Open Mic (Velour)

DJ Stereo Sparks (Cisero’s)

American Bush 2630 S. 300 W. 801.467.0700

HOT GIRLS WANTED APPLY IN PERSON

UPCOMING EVENTS:

PHRYME AT PIONEER PARK THURSDAY, JULY 30 GATES OPEN AT 5PM MUSIC 7PM

FARMERS MARKET AT PIONEER PARK

SATURDAY, AUGUST 1 8AM-2PM

A RELAXED GENTLEMAN’S CLUB DA I LY L U N C H S P E C I A L S POOL, FOOSBALL & GAMES

NO

SHREK THE MUSICAL

FIRE, WATER & ICE FESTIVAL

FRIDAY, AUGUST 7 AT 8PM

SATURDAY, AUGUST 8 AT 12PM

AT SANDY AMPITHEATRE

LIVE MUSIC

Bobby B, Coorunnin, Aleo, Shah Team, AirZonA (The Complex) Dan Weldon (Snowbird Resort) Gary Tada (Fats Grill) Grand Banks, Beachmen, James Allen Spirit, Suburban Birds (Urban Lounge) The Kings of 88 (Deer Valley Snow Park Outdoor Amphitheater) P.O.D., Berlin Breaks, Seven Second Memory, High Pressure Flash, Von Andeck (The Royal) Rob Bell (The Complex) Sam Bush (Canyons Resort) Sam Smith (Maverik Center) Shannon Runyon (O.P. Rockwell)

KARAOKE

Clean Comedy Open Mic (Club 90) Open Mic (Sugarhouse Coffee)

DJ

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54 | JULY 30, 2015

Shannon Runyon (O.P. Rockwell) Soul Asylum, Meat Puppets (Sky, see p.46) Sulane, First Daze, The Wednesday People, Cade Walker, Ties for Tolliver (The Complex) Your Meteor, Koala Temple, Great Interstate, Red Telephone (Urban Lounge) Wasatch Jazz Project (Sugarhouse Coffee)

WEDNESDAY 8.5

COVER E VER!

AT KEARNS OQUIRRH PARK

275 0 SOU T H 3 0 0 W ES T · (8 01) 4 67- 4 6 0 0 11: 3 0 -1A M M O N - S AT · 11: 3 0 A M -10 P M S U N

OPEN MIC AND JAM

Jam Night Featuring Dead Lake Trio (The Woodshed)

RANDY'S RECORD SHOP VINYL RECORDS NEW & USED $2 LP Sale Fri. Aug. 14th & Sat. Aug. 15th Most LP's valued $2-$7, some $8-$10

“UTAH’S LONGEST RUNNING INDIE RECORD STORE” SINCE 1978

AM/FM/CD/USB/SD CARD/AUX IN TE CO M P LEA G E PA CK

WITH REMOTE

6.5” 2-WAY MARINE SPKS

WAS $12999

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COAXIAL SPEAKERS WITH LIGHTUP GRILLS AND WIRELESS RF REMOTE

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i4999 $ i4999 $ i9999

•5.25” COAXIAL $ •6.5” COAXIAL

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EXTERIOR AVAILABLE IN WHITE & SILVER

PAIR

6.9" COAXIAL

CMQ SERIES

pr pr

pr pr pr

FULL RANGE SPEAKERS

10AM TO 7PM

FREE LAYAWAY

MONDAY– SATURDAY CLOSED SUNDAY

NO

CREDIT NEEDED

Se Habla Español

• OGDEN 2822 WALL AVE: 621-0086

Se Habla Español

DAY PAYMENT 90 OPTION

• OREM 1680 N. STATE: 226-6090

Se Habla Español

MODEL CLOSE-OUTS, DISCONTINUED ITEMS AND SOME SPECIALS ARE LIMITED TO STOCK ON HAND AND MAY INCLUDE DEMOS. PRICES GUARANTEED THRU 08/1/15

JULY 30, 2015 | 55

W W W. S O U N DWA R E H O U S E U TA H .C O M

HOURS

SLC 2763 S. STATE: 485-0070

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9999 $ II999

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Audio Systems

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TUE – FRI 11AM TO 7PM • SAT 10AM TO 6PM • CLOSED SUN & MON LIKE US ON OR VISIT WWW.RANDYSRECORDS.COM • 801.532.4413

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VENUE DIRECTORY

LIVE MUSIC & KARAOKE

5 MONKEYS 7 E. 4800 South, Murray, 801266-1885, Karaoke, Free pool, Live music A BAR NAMED SUE 3928 S. Highland Drive,

CHECK US FIRST! LOW OR NO FEES! Thursday, July 30

Eddie Turner Bleu Bistro

saturday, august 1

A.A. Bondy Urban Lounge

saturday, august 3

American Aquarium Music Garage

chicano batman Urban Lounge

amanda x Kilby Court

saturday, august 5

P.O.D w/ Berlin Breaks, Seven Second Memory The Royal

JAZZ IS DEAD The State Room

saturday, august 6

Kenny Chesney

Energy Solutions Arena

saturday, august 8

Kelly Clarkson USANA Amphitheatre

Jackie Greene Band The State Room

Dusky

Urban Lounge

Monday, August 10 Cody Canada and The Departed In The Venue

Lake Street Drive The State Room

THursday, august 13

Richard Thompson The State Room

Tinariwen Urban Lounge

Friday, august 14

Folks Festival-3 Day pass for Two with camping

SLC, 801-274-5578, Trivia Tues., DJ Wed., Karaoke Thurs.

A BAR NAMED SUE ON STATE 8136 S. State, SLC, 801-566-3222, Karaoke Tues.

ABG’S LIBATION EMPORIUM 190 W. Center St., Provo, 801-373-1200, Live music ALLEGED 205 25th St., Ogden, 801-9900692 AREA 51 451 S. 400 West, SLC, 801-5340819, Karaoke Wed., ‘80s Thurs., DJs Fri. & Sat. THE BAR IN SUGARHOUSE 2168 S. Highland Drive, SLC, 801-485-1232 BAR-X 155 E. 200 South, SLC, 801-355-2287 BARBARY COAST 4242 S. State, Murray, 801-265-9889 BATTERS UP 1717 S. Main, SLC, 801-4634996, Karaoke Tues., Live music Sat. THE BAYOU 645 S. State, SLC, 801-9618400, Live music Fri. & Sat. BOURBON HOUSE 19 E. 200 South, SLC, 801-746-1005, Local jazz jam Tues., Karaoke Thurs., Live music Sat., Funk & soul night Sun. BREWSKIS 244 25th St., Ogden, 801-3941713, Live music CANYON INN 3700 E. Fort Union, SLC, 801943-6969, DJs CAROL’S COVE II 3424 S. State, SLC,

Planet Bluegrass

801-466-2683, Karaoke Thurs., DJs & Live

saturday, august 15

THE CENTURY CLUB 315 24th St., Ogden,

6th Annual Utah Beer Festival Library Square

JAZZ IS DEAD The State Room

sunday, august 16

Shane Koyczan and The Short Story Long The State Room

tuesday, august 18

KMFDM

Urban Lounge

music Fri. & Sat. 801-781-5005, DJs, Live music CHEERS TO YOU 315 S. Main, SLC, 801575-6400 CHEERS TO YOU MIDVALE 7642 S. State, 801-566-0871 CHUCKLE’S LOUNGE 221 W. 900 South, SLC, 801-532-1721 CIRCLE LOUNGE 328 S. State, SLC, 801-5315400, DJs CISERO’S 306 Main, Park City, 435-6495044, Karaoke Thurs., Live music & DJs CLUB 48 16 E. 4800 South, Murray, 801262-7555 CLUB 90 9065 S. 150 West, Sandy, 801-5663254, Trivia Mon., Poker Thurs., Live music Fri. & Sat., Live bluegrass Sun. CLUB TRY-ANGLES 251 W. 900 South, SLC, 801-364-3203, Karaoke Thurs., DJs Fri. & Sat. CLUB X 445 S. 400 West, SLC, 801-9354267, DJs, Live music THE COMPLEX 536 W. 100 South, SLC, 801-528-9197, Live music CRUZRS SALOON 3943 S. Highland Drive,

thursday, august 20

SLC, 801-272-1903, Free pool Wed. & Thurs.,

Joe Bonamassa

DAWG POUND 3350 S. State, SLC, 801-261-

USANA Amphitheatre

VISIT CITYWEEKLYTIX.COM FOR MORE SHOWS & DETAILS!

Karaoke Fri. & Sat. 2337, Live music THE DEERHUNTER PUB 2000 N. 300 West, Spanish Fork, 801-798-8582, Live music Fri. & Sat. THE DEPOT 400 W. South Temple, SLC, 801-355-5522, Live music

DEVIL’S DAUGHTER 533 S. 500 West, SLC, 801-532-1610, Karaoke Wed., Live music Fri. & Sat. DO DROP INN 2971 N. Hill Field Road (400 West), Layton, 801-776-9697. Karaoke Fri. & Sat. DONKEY TAILS CANTINA 136 E. 12300 South, Draper, 801-571-8134. Karaoke Wed.; Live music Tues., Thurs. & Fri; Live DJ Sat. DOWNSTAIRS 625 Main, Park City, 435226-5340, Live music, DJs ELIXIR LOUNGE 6405 S. 3000 East, Holladay, 801-943-1696 THE FALLOUT 625 S. 600 West, SLC, 801953-6374, Live music FAT’S GRILL 2182 S. Highland Drive, SLC, 801-484-9467, Live music THE FILLING STATION 8987 W. 2700 South, Magna, 801-250-1970, Karaoke Thurs.

FLANAGAN’S ON MAIN 438 Main, Park City, 435-649-8600, Trivia Tues., Live music Fri. & Sat. FOX HOLE PUB & GRILL 7078 S. Redwood Road, West Jordan, 801-566-4653, Karaoke, Live music FUNK ’N DIVE BAR 2550 Washington Blvd., Ogden, 801-621-3483, Live music, Karaoke THE GARAGE 1199 Beck St., SLC, 801-5213904, Live music GRACIE’S 326 S. West Temple, SLC, 801819-7565, Live music, DJs THE GREAT SALTAIR 12408 W. Saltair Drive, Magna, 801-250-6205, Live music THE GREEN PIG PUB 31 E. 400 South, SLC, 801-532-7441, Live music Thurs.-Sat. HABITS 832 E. 3900 South, SLC, 801-2682228, Poker Mon., Ladies night Tues., ’80s night Wed., Karaoke Thurs., DJs Fri. & Sat. HIGHLANDER 6194 S. Highland Drive, SLC, 801-277-8251, Karaoke THE HOG WALLOW PUB 3200 E. Big Cottonwood Canyon Road, SLC, 801-733-5567, Live music THE HOTEL/CLUB ELEVATE 155 W. 200 South, SLC, 801-478-4310, DJs HUKA BAR & GRILL 151 E. 6100 South, Murray, 801-281-9665, Reggae Tues., DJs Fri. & Sat. IN THE VENUE/CLUB SOUND 219 S. 600 West, SLC, 801-359-3219, Live music & DJs JACKALOPE LOUNGE 372 S. State, SLC, 801-359-8054, DJs JAM 751 N. 300 West, SLC, 801-891-1162, Karaoke Tues., Wed. & Sun.; DJs Thurs.-Sat. JOHNNY’S ON SECOND 165 E. 200 South, SLC, 801-746-3334, DJs Tues. & Fri., Karaoke Wed., Live music Sat. KARAMBA 1051 E. 2100 South, SLC, 801696-0639, DJs KEYS ON MAIN 242 S. Main, SLC, 801-3633638, Karaoke Tues. & Wed., Dueling pianos Thurs.-Sat. KILBY COURT 741 S. Kilby Court (330 West), SLC, 801-364-3538, Live music, all ages KRISTAUF’S 16 W. Market St., SLC, 801943-1696, DJ Fri. & Sat. THE LEPRECHAUN INN 4700 S. 900 East, Murray, 801-268-3294 LIQUID JOE’S 1249 E. 3300 South, SLC, 801-467-5637, Live music Tues.-Sat. THE LOADING DOCK 445 S. 400 West, SLC, 385-229-4493, Live music, all ages LUCKY 13 135 W. 1300 South, SLC, 801487-4418, Trivia Wed. LUMPY’S DOWNTOWN 145 Pierpont Ave., SLC, 801-938-3070

LUMPY’S HIGHLAND 3000 S. Highland Drive, SLC, 801-484-5597 THE MADISON/THE COWBOY 295 W. Center St., Provo, 801-375-9000, Live music, DJs MAXWELL’S EAST COAST EATERY 9 Exchange Place, SLC, 801-328-0304, Poker Tues., DJs Fri. & Sat. METRO BAR 615 W. 100 South, SLC, 801652-6543, DJs THE MOOSE LOUNGE 180 W. 400 South, SLC, 801-900-7499, DJs NO NAME SALOON 447 Main, Park City, 435-649-6667 THE OFFICE 122 W. Pierpont Ave., SLC, 801-883-8838 O.P. ROCKWELL 268 Main, Park City, 435615-7000, Live music PARK CITY LIVE 427 Main, Park City, 435649-9123, Live music PAT’S BBQ 155 W. Commonwealth Ave., SLC, 801-484-5963, Live music Thurs.-Sat., All ages THE PENALTY BOX 3 W. 4800 South, Murray, 801-590-9316, Karaoke Tues., Live Music, DJs PIPER DOWN 1492 S. State, SLC, 801-4681492, Poker Mon., Acoustic Tues., Trivia Wed., Bingo Thurs.

POPLAR STREET PUB 242 S. 200 West, SLC, 801-532-2715, Live music Thurs.-Sat. THE RED DOOR 57 W. 200 South, SLC, 801-363-6030, DJs Fri., Live jazz Sat. THE ROYAL 4760 S. 900 East, SLC, 801590-9940, Live music SANDY STATION 8925 Harrison St., Sandy, 801-255-2078, DJs SCALLYWAGS 3040 S. State, SLC, 801604-0869 SKY 149 W. Pierpont Ave., SLC, 801-8838714, Live music THE SPUR BAR & GRILL 352 Main, Park City, 435-615-1618, Live music THE STATE ROOM 638 S. State, SLC, 800501-2885, Live music THE STEREO ROOM 521 N. 1200 West, Orem, 714-345-8163, Live music, All ages SUGARHOUSE PUB 1992 S. 1100 East, SLC, 801-413-2857 THE SUN TRAPP 102 S. 600 West, SLC, 385-235-6786 THE TAVERNACLE 201 E. 300 South, SLC, 801-519-8900, Dueling pianos Wed.-Sat., Karaoke Sun.-Tues.

TIN ANGEL CAFE 365 W. 400 South, SLC, 801-328-4155, Live music THE URBAN LOUNGE 241 S. 500 East, SLC, 801-746-0557, Live music VELOUR 135 N. University Ave., Provo, 801818-2263, Live music, All ages WASTED SPACE 342 S. State, SLC, 801531-2107, DJs Thurs.-Sat. THE WESTERNER 3360 S. Redwood Road, West Valley City, 801-972-5447, Live music WILLIE’S LOUNGE 1716 S. Main, SLC, 760828-7351, Trivia Wed., Karaoke Fri.-Sun., Live music THE WOODSHED 60 E. 800 South, SLC, 801-364-0805, Karaoke Sun. & Tues., Open jam Wed., Reggae Thurs., Live music Fri. & Sat. ZEST KITCHEN & BAR 275 S. 200 West, SLC, 801-433-0589, DJs

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Long-long-long-read Interviews With Local Bands, Comedians, Artists, Podcasters, Fashionistas And Other Creators Of Cool Stuff Only On Cityweekly.net!

Š 2015

BY DAVID LEVINSON WILK

ACROSS

1. Several 2. ____ to self 3. It's a huge load of garbage 4. Earl of the U.S. Supreme Court 5. Baldwin of "30 Rock" 6. It may be bumper-to-bumper 7. Diagnosis deliverers: Abbr.

8. Trouble-free place 9. Obama who toured colleges in 2015

50. TV's Ortiz and Gasteyer 52. Suffix with major 54. Spooky-sounding Pennsylvania city 55. Pioneer's direction 57. Pop star Rita whose last name is the title of her 2012 debut album

Last week’s answers

No math is involved. The grid has numbers, but nothing has to add up to anything else. Solve the puzzle with reasoning and logic. Solving time is typically 10 to 30 minutes, depending on your skill and experience.

DOWN

10. Knoxville sch.

11. Swamp plant 13. "There is a rose" in this neighborhood in a 1960 hit song 14. Passover, for one 20. Complex units: Abbr.

22. Geishas' wear 24. Milky gems 26. On vacation 27. Baking ____ 30. "And I ____ ..."

31. "Use your inside voice!" (or a hint to this puzzle's theme) 32. List-ending abbrs.

33. Insect repellent ingredient 37. "What are you, some kind of ____?"

40. Workplace welfare org.

43. Light, as a conversation 44. Fussbudget 45. Love, Italian-style 46. Problem in bed, for some

Complete the grid so that each row, column, diagonal and 3x3 square contain all of the numbers 1 to 9.

1. Fire ____ 4. Toasty 8. Birds appearing on Australia's 50 cent coins 12. Part of FWIW 13. Spanish response to a sneeze 14. Online singles service that features a synagogue directory 15. Gate posting, for short 16. Garlic ____ 17. Helped supply a sushi restaurant, say 18. Director Anderson 19. Part of a foot 20. Shop shelter 21. Sharpen 23. Native American tribe with a rain dance 25. Suffix with hex26. Rubbish holder 28. Pulls (out) 29. "____ me!"

30. Keep from spreading, as a rumor 31. Proof-ending letters 34. Add ____ of salt 35. Address found online 36. French word before cuisine or couture 38. Piehole 39. Very funny happenings 41. Chilling, as Champagne 42. Subj. for Galileo 43. Most bummed 44. Petting zoo sound 47. Carla player on "Cheers" 48. "Norma Rae" director Martin 49. Serengeti bounder 51. Supply, as paper to a copier 53. Drops on the field?

56. "Death Be Not Proud" poet 57. "It's not my cup ____" 58. Prospector's find 59. Bedtime story?

60. Upscale 61. Mich. neighbor 62. Some Senate votes 63. ____-deucy 64. Safety measure

SUDOKU

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Opened in summer 2013, Brittany Golden Studio and Gallery has a wide range of classes for students to choose from. Some are taught by Golden herself, others by guest instructors. Classes range from a few hours or days to an entire six months. Brittany Golden Studio and Gallery is always adding new classes and new instructors. Students may register for classes on the studio’s website (BrittanyGolden.com). Classes are limited to five to eight students, and they fill quickly.

Those who miss out on the chance to sign up for a particular class can be added to a waitlist—and the studio also offers private lessons to fit individual schedules. Classes include silversmithing, metalsmithing, foldforming (hammering, folding and heating copper), enameling (fusing powdered glass to metal with heat) and more. Studio rental space is also available for those who have taken classes and want to continue jewelrymaking on their own.

And if you’re about to tie the knot, Brittany Golden Studio and Gallery offers a unique opportunity to put a personalized stamp on your nuptials—wedding-ring workshops. Workshops start at $300 per ring and are by appointment only, allowing clients to create beautiful, unique, and personalized bands.

Not feeling particularly artistic, but want something that no one else will have? Brittany Golden also offers unique custom orders. Golden requires a 50 percent deposit on custom orders. The studio also features different artists and their work and participates in the Sugar House Art Walk. n

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eaders looking to engage their artistic side should check out Brittany Golden Studio and Gallery, a local business offering jewelry-making classes; unique, locally made jewelry and the opportunity for customers to put in custom orders.

Brittany Golden, the owner of the studio and gallery, has been making jewelry for 13 years and has 10 years of teaching experience. Before opening her Sugar House location, she was a silversmith instructor at Sundance Resort for nine years and taught at a Provo studio for four years.

“I actually went to school to become a dental lab technician,” Golden explained.

In order to get student-loan money, however, she had to be taking classes at nearby Utah Valley State College (now Utah Valley University). “I took five semesters’ worth of jewelry-making and then realized I hated making teeth,” she says.

Recently, Golden ran into her past instructor while out to dinner. “It was fun to see it come full circle,” she said, explaining how she told her teacher that she was now teaching others to make jewelry. Her instructor sold his old equipment and now comes to her studio to work himself.

Golden’s students are passionate about the program. Kim Astin, who is currently enrolled in Golden’s six-month jewelry business certification class, has been doing classes with Golden since she worked at Sundance. “I love the creative outlet,” Astin says. “Learning real jewelry-making using high-quality materials to make highquality products that you can be proud to wear, give away or sell—it’s incredible.”

Jaclyn Renee, another student in the jewelry business class, agrees. Renee took her first jewelry-making class four months ago and fell in love with it. “Brittany is a great teacher and this is a great program,” Renee said. “I’m so glad I dived in.”

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Brittany golden Studio and Gallery offers workshops, classes and studio space for both budding and professional jewelry makers.

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Beggars Belief

My cross to bear These break neck speeds Tears of the poppy Shall drown any mans’ dreams If you choose to believe my beggars belief to have the courage to leave her a most beautiful thrill the sweetest of fevers to say goodbye, the highest of highs nothing comes close, nothing could top it But you have to remember And never forget a dog will always and forever return to its vomit CC James Send your poem (max 15 lines), to: Poet’s Corner, City Weekly, 248 South Main Street, SLC, UT 84101 or e-mail to poetscorner@cityweekly.net.

Published entrants receive a $15 value gift from CW. Each entry must include name and mailing address.

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t’s all my brother’s fault. The fact that’s he’s younger and has an original Takashi Murakami’s print hanging in his New York City apartment was the reason I sought out a store named Fice in Salt Lake City (160 E. 200 South, @fice_gallery). I was jealous and had to have a Murakami, even if it was just a slip-on sneaker from Vans Vault with the artist’s iconic smiling flower.

I’ve been following Fice on Instagram forever (that’s how I found out about the release) and its feed is rad, but a little out of my style element. Or maybe not, now that sneakers are de rigueur. I haven’t been in the store since it opened in 2008—I went there before a Twilight Concert at nearby Gallivan Center.

Fast forward eight years, and I return to Fice to find out the limited edition Murakamis sold out in 5 hours. What? Seriously? Yes, folks wait in line, sometimes for five days, in anticipation of a limited-edition sneaker release.

What was going on in here? I had to find out.

Fice is in the historic building that formerly housed Guthrie Bicycle for more than 100 years. If the location doesn’t seem familiar at first, all you need to do is look at the store’s east exterior brick wall, where the owners (local guy Corey Bullough and

CHRISTA ZARO comments@cityweekly.net

retired pro shredder Laura Hadar) commissioned a striking giant mural, “Ave Maria,” by street artists El Mac and Retina. Bullough and Hadar created a concept unique in Utah and the Mountain West region: a sneaker boutique with street wear inspired by New York City sneaker shops/art gallery with monthly rotating local artists.

This is not your ordinary Foot Locker fare.

Fice sells Nike and Vans, but those shoe manufacturers have unique lines separate from their retail tiers, which they sell to very select stores across the United States. For example, the Vans Vault line is available at only 26 stores across the country and 40 shops worldwide, and Fice is in the game. Fice also represents the top-tier Asics and Saucony lines.

Their clothing labels are just as unique, with brands like 10 Deep, Black Scale and The Hundreds. These lines are at once fashionforward and throwbacks to the late ’80s/early ’90s hip-hop scene. Huf is a line that uses retro ’80s imagery and reworks it into a contemporary vision with a nod to the past.

Sneakers have totally crossed over into mainstream fashion and are no longer worn just at the gym. Just as jeans made their way into the workplace, now sneakers are doing the same. Fice has got you covered for a totally unique, one-of-a-kind sneaker. Step in there. n Follow Christa: @phillytoslc

Jobs Rentals ll Buy/Se Trade post your free online · classified ads at

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Sneakers are no longer just for NBA players, the gym and rap videos.

FICE GALLERY STANDOUTS:

Air Jordan 11 lab 4, red: $250 Isaac Hastings “Hands” tee: $28 Nike Dunk Sky Hi Essential: $120 10 Deep Island Life tee: $48 Two Thirds/Vans Vault collaboration purple & gray canvas high-top: $100 Nike Air Max “Swamp Thing:” $110 Ladies Nike Windrunner, green: $180

(clockwise from left) Ladies Nike Free TR Fit 5, black & white: $110 Huf Boca (flower) hat: $40 Huf gingham Oxford shirt: $68 Asics sneaker: $110 Huf “Plant Life” socks: $12 Vans Vault Diemme leather Italian high-top: $350 Stockton & Malone “Stance” socks: $14 The Hundreds X Fice collaboration team hat: $36

FREE WILL ASTROLOGY B Y R O B

B R E Z S N Y

Go to RealAstrology.com for Rob Brezsny’s expanded weekly audio horoscopes and daily text-message horoscopes.

Audio horoscopes also available by phone at 877-873-4888 or 900-950-7700.

ARIES (March 21-April 19) “I am very much in love with no one in particular,” says actor Ezra Miller. His statement would make sense coming out of your mouth right about now. So would this one: “I am very much in love with almost everyone I encounter.” Or this one: “I am very much in love with the wind and moon and hills and rain and rivers.” Is this going to be a problem? How will you deal with your overwhelming urge to overflow? Will you break people’s hearts and provoke uproars everywhere you go, or will you rouse delight and bestow blessings?

As long as you take yourself lightly, I foresee delight and blessings.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20) In her io9.com article on untranslatable words, Esther Inglis-Arkell defines the Chinese term wei-wu-wei as “conscious non-action … a deliberate, and principled, decision to do nothing whatsoever, and to do it for a particular reason.” In my astrological opinion, the coming days would be a favorable time to explore and experiment with this approach. I think you will reap wondrous benefits if you slow down and rest in the embrace of a pregnant pause. The mysteries of silence and emptiness will be rich resources.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20) “I always liked side-paths, little dark back-alleys behind the main road—there one finds adventures and surprises, and precious metal in the dirt.” The character named Dmitri Karamazov makes that statement in Fyodor Dostoyevsky’s novel The Brothers Karamazov. And now I’m thinking that you might like to claim his attitude as your own. Just for a while, you understand. Not forever.

The magic of the side paths and back-alleys may last for no more than a few weeks, and then gradually fade. But in the meantime, the experiences you uncover there could be fun and educational. I do have one question for you, though: What do you think Dmitri meant by “precious metal in the dirt”? Money? Gold? Jewelry?

Was he speaking metaphorically? I’m sure you’ll find out.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21) “Every time you resist acting on your anger and instead restore yourself to calm, it gets easier,” writes psychologist Laura Markham in Psychology Today. In fact, neurologists claim that by using your willpower in this way, “you’re actually rewiring your brain.” And so the more you practice, the less likely it is that you will be addled by rage in the future. I see the coming weeks as an especially favorable time for you to do this work, Scorpio.

Keeping a part of your anger alive is good, of course—sometimes you need its energy to motivate constructive change. But you would benefit from culling the excess.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) Much of the action in the world’s novels takes place inside buildings, according to author Robert Bringhurst. But characters in older Russian literature are an exception, he says. They are always out in the forests, traveling and rambling. In accordance with astrological omens, I suggest that you draw inspiration from the Russians’ example in the coming days. As often and as long as you can, put yourself in locations where the sky is overhead. Nature is the preferred setting, but even urban spots are good. Your luck, wisdom, and courage are likely to increase in direct proportion to how much time you spend outdoors.

JULY 30, 2015 | 61

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) French and Italian readers may have no problem with this horoscope. But Americans, Canadians, Brits, and Aussies might be offended, even grossed out. Why? Because my analysis of the astrological omens compels me to conclude that “moist” is a central theme for you right now. And research has shown that many speakers of the English language find the sound of the word “moist” equivalent to hearing fingernails scratching a chalkboard. If you are one of those people, I apologize. But the VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) Expiration dates loom. Fond adieus and last laughs and final fact is, you will go astray unless you stay metaphorically moist. hurrahs are on tap. Unfinished business is begging you to give it You need to cultivate an attitude that is damp but not sodden; your smartest attention while there’s still time to finish it with dewy but not soggy; sensitive and responsive and lyrical, but not elegance and grace. So here’s my advice for you, my on-the- overwrought or weepy or histrionic. verge friend: Don’t save any of your tricks, ingenuity or enthusiasm for later. This is the later you’ve been saving them for. You PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20) are more ready than you realize to try what has always seemed Which signs of the zodiac are the most expert sleepers? Who improbable or inconceivable before now. Here’s my promise: If best appreciates the healing power of slumber and feels the least you handle these endings with righteous decisiveness, you will shame about taking naps? Which of the twelve astrological tribes are most inclined to study the art of snoozing and use their ensure bright beginnings in the weeks after your birthday. knowledge to get the highest quality renewal from their time in bed? My usual answer to these questions would be Taurus and LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22) A company called Evil Supply sells a satirical poster that contains Cancer, but I’m hoping you Pisceans will vie for the top spot in the following quote: “Be the villain you were born to be. Stop the coming weeks. It’s a very favorable time for you to increase waiting for someone to come along and corrupt you. Succumb your mastery of this supreme form of self-care. to the darkness yourself.” The text in the advertisement for this LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) I expect you to be in a state of constant birth for the next three weeks. Awakening and activation will come naturally. Your drive to blossom and create may be irresistible, bordering on unruly. Does that sound overwhelming? I don’t think it will be a problem as long as you cultivate a mood of amazed amusement about it. (P.S. This upsurge is a healthy response to the dissolution that preceded it.)

| COMMUNITY |

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) Has a beloved teacher disappointed you? Are there inspirational figures about whom you feel conflicted because they don’t live up to all of your high standards? Have you become alienated from a person who gave you a blessing but later expressed a flaw you find hard to overlook? Now would be an excellent time to seek healing for rifts like these. Outright forgiveness is one option. You could also work on deepening your appreciation for how complicated and paradoxical everyone is. One more suggestion: Meditate on how your longing for what’s perfect might be an enemy of your ability to benefit from what’s merely good.

| CITYWEEKLY.NET |

CANCER (June 21-July 22) “Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason,” says comedian Jerry Seinfeld. His implication is that rejecting traditional strategies and conventional wisdom doesn’t always lead to success. As a professional rebel myself, I find it painful to agree even a little bit with that idea. But I do think it’s applicable to your life right now. For the foreseeable future, compulsive nonconformity is likely to yield mediocrity. Putting too much emphasis on being unique rather than on being right might distract you from the truth. My advice: Stick to the road more traveled.

product adds, “Follow your nightmares … Plot your own nefarious path.” Although this counsel is slightly funny to me, I’m too moral and upright to recommend it to you—even now, when I think there would be value in you being less nice and polite and agreeable than you usually are. So I’ll tinker with Evil Supply’s message to create more suitable advice: “For the greater good, follow your naughty bliss. Be a leader with a wild imagination.

Nudge everyone out of their numbing routines. Sow benevolent mischief that energizes your team.”

| COMMUNITY | | CITYWEEKLY.NET |

62 | JULY 30, 2015

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To Place and Find Utah’s Hottest Career Opportunities LINE COOK/DISHWASHER Line cook $10-$12 depending on experience able to work in a fast pace environment, have flexible hours work well in a team setting. Dishwasher $9/ hr part time.Qualifications 1-2 years cooking experience must be over 21yrs old.Additional information either email or drop off resume to pub ask for Chris/ Matt Contactchris@poplarstreetpub.com INSIDE SALES CONSULTANT Unlimited Income Potential Qualifications:Sales experience; Prefer at least 1 year of commission based sales. Must be at least 18 years of age or older.

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s a doddering older person born in upstate New York, I did not, and was not, ever around this game called “soccer” (aka football). I had never even seen a soccer ball until I traveled with my family South of the Border after we moved to Arizona. My dad was a serious baseball and football fan and also a scratch golfer, and a soon-to-be bullfight patron. Soccer never entered our paradigm. I only now know about soccer when Ross, my intern, comes in wearing his Real Salt Lake sweat-suit jacket, and he’s in a happy place because his Real won. Honestly, I’ve tried to be a fan and forced myself to watch games on the TV box. Alas, it’s just not my game.

However, I am a fan of Real owner Dell Loy Hansen. I met this smiley guy a few years back and assumed he was just your average Zions Bank manager or an LDS Church official, or maybe a professor of animal husbandry at his alma mater, Utah State University. I didn’t know what he did for a living, just that he was into making Salt Lake City a better place. That got my attention. Lo and behold, slap my head and call me stupid, Hansen not only is the main Real owner, but the CEO of the Wasatch Group.

Never heard of his other company? It owns huge interests downtown, in the Wells Fargo high rise, the historic/retro/restored Ken Garff Building and Questar’s Corporate Center. It owns nearly 17,000 apartments in five states, too. When Hansen’s group bought shares in the Wells Fargo Building on Main Street, he also brought life back to that particular block. He convinced KUTV Channel 2 to move downtown to the “sidewalk” of his little purchase, so they could have a Today Showesque visual format. If you’ve tuned into 2 News, you know anyone can walk up behind the talking heads at 6 and 10 p.m. and wave at the cameras. He also took an old bank building on 300 South and turned it into one of the finest broadcast studios in the Western United States. He bought out most of the assets of Simmons Media and acquired U92, X96, Rewind 100.7, Eagle 101.5 and Mix 107.9 radio stations. He already owned ESPN 700 (the old KALL radio station) and got Salt Lake City to approve an electronic billboard over the station’s headquarters.

Hansen was unable to convince the Legislature and Salt Lake City Council that we could use another soccer stadium for his minor league team, the Monarchs. He’s still hunting for build options. To dispel rumors, he and the Wasatch Group recently purchased 2.3 acres on the southwest corner of 600 South and State Street for $5.82 million to build “mid-priced housing for the city’s regular workforce”—not a stadium. Goooooaaaaaaal for housing! n [Editor’s note: Babs De Lay is a candidate for Salt Lake City Council District 4.]

Content is prepared expressly for Community and is not by City Weekly staff

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Notice: The People Have Taken Back Constitution From Corrupt Rule Legal Notice reprint [7/26 BH Weekly, edited for clarity & space]

TO THE U.S. FEDERAL GOVERNMENT: The FED’L GOV’T has defaulted on its duties to the Constitution, failing to show cause why The People should live under oppressive economic tactics & unnecessary societal controls imposed as nat’l security, & failing to answer notices or show up for its mediation. All corrupt rule is ORDERED forever terminated & America DECLARED forever free from its subjugation.

| CITYWEEKLY.NET |

The FED’L GOV’T has weakened the Bill of Rights, & acted to keep The People from stopping it. FED’L GOV’T has violated serious laws: U.S.C. A(5) (gen. malfeasance), 18 U.S.C § 371 (conspiracy for benefit), 18 U.S.C. Part I, Ch 73 § 1505 (obstruction of agency), & has shown to conflict with or erode Articles I, § 2, Par. 3, § 8, Last Par.; II, § 1, Last Par.; III, § 2, Par. 1 & 2; V; VI, Last Par.; Amendments I; II; III; IV; V; VI; X; XIII; & XIV. This constitutes a breach of public trust. The FED’L GOV’T is HEREBY REPRIMANDED, & its authority REVOKED.

| COMMUNITY |

A Congress met to correct this (2012, 1st Amendment “redress”), & a Fed’l Recall was held Jan. 14, 2014 (10th “reserved powers”, as per George Wash., 1787).

Notices & warrants ORDERED compliance. Gov’t leaders were held IN CONTEMPT for obstruction & SANCTIONS issued on D.C. Pres. Obama was ORDERED to meet, restore protections & transition. But, law & order has FAILED. THEREFORE, Order of the Declaration of Ind. is now in effect, as gov’t power is FOUND absent. For, The PEOPLE are GRANTED authority to ALTER OR ABOLISH destructive gov’t. WHEREBY, The People CHOSE to KEEP their Constitution & ENFORCE the Recall. NO decision or law may be imposed without oversight or correction, or have corp. personhood or inequitable power over another, even treaties with Iran, being HEREBY OVERTURNED & NULLIFIED. SO ORDERED. Accordingly, the Recall of 2014 is RENDERED in effect. WHEREBY, each Head of State at the time of the Recall MUST VACATE, also including Antonin Scalia, Senators who served over one term, & Representatives over two. Accordingly, all laws & acts are HEREBY subject to LAWS OF THE PEOPLE. WHEREBY, amendments codified from delegates & petitions, those APPROVED for good gov’t & social-economic equity, are ratified by DEFAULT as uncontested.

Your home could be sold here. Call me for a free market analysis today.

SEE VIRTUAL TOURS AT URBANUTAH.COM

JULY 30, 2015 | 63

Attested by my hand & [Seal] this 7th day of July , 2015.

Stephen L. Rush, Will of the People Const’l Authority To sponsor reprints: info@willofthepeople.agency

| CITYWEEKLY.NET |

| CITY WEEKLY • BACKSTOP |

64 | JULY 30, 2015

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