Bar Bat Mitzvah - Fall/Winter 2015

Mitzvah Bar•Bat

FALL•WINTER 2015

BARBATMAGAZINE.COM

JOYOUS

OCCASION

Inside: Expert advice to help families make a bar or bat mitzvah memorable and meaningful

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Mitzvah Bar•Bat

Fall•Winter 2015

CONTENTS

8 Mitzvah Bar•Bat

FALL•WINTER 2015

BARBATMAGAZINE.COM

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JOYOUS

OCCASION

Inside: Expert advice to help families make a bar or bat mitzvah memorable and meaningful

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Mitzvah Bar•Bat

Nort Ohio’s coheast b’nai m mplete itz planningvah resource !

On the cover: Ben Schwartz on the occasion of his bar mitzvah Aug. 22, 2015 at Fairmount Temple in Beachwood. Photo by Kim Ponsky Photography.

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Editor’s Note

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Editor Michael C. Butz: James Franco proves it’s never too late

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Volunteer Victories 48

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Bar•Bat Mitzvah Planner

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The Responsible Parties Parents are charged with the task of party planning, but with these tips, they can take charge of the process

Bar•Bat Mitzvah // Fall•Winter 2015

Game Time The market for entertainment- and game-based venues is growing in Northeast Ohio, leading to plenty of options for bar and bat mitzvah parties

Friendship Circle’s Mitzvah Volunteer Program leads to winning relationships

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Planning tips about catering, floral design, stationery, entertainment, photography and more

Banking On It Money is a slam-dunk gift, and developing a game plan for managing it is a winning strategy

Looking Back Well-known Northeast Ohioans remember their bar or bat mitzvah

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Ask A Pro

Bowl Them Over Contemporary bowling alleys offer much more than just 10-pin activities to keep bar and bat mitzvah parties entertained

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Proper Presents Inexpensive and meaningful options aplenty for your bar or bat mitzvah gift

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NEVER E TOO LATE

very now and again, you’ll come across someone who had his bar mitzvah or her bat mitzvah later in life. Perhaps less common, though, is when the person is a Hollywood star.

Such was the case when actor James Franco became a bar mitzvah at the age of 37. The Oct. 3 ceremony was held in a private home, and Franco wore a tallit and chanted from the Torah. It was a day 24 years in the making for Franco, who marked the occasion by posting on Instagram.

“I do feel like I missed out on the Jewish experience. My Jewish friends tell me not to worry ... but I like the idea of religion as a source of community,” Franco said in a 2009 interview with The Guardian. Such should no longer be the case.

(In case you missed it: Franco has Northeast Ohio ties. His maternal grandparents, Dan and Mitzie Verne, founded the Verne Gallery: A Gallery of Japanese Prints and Paintings decades ago in Cleveland’s Little Italy neighborhood. When the couple retired, they left the gallery in the hands of their son, Michael Verne, who is Franco’s uncle.)

Instagram Helping celebrate Franco’s coming of age was his friend and fellow actor, Seth Rogen.

“Ever since I’ve known James, he’s been talking about wanting a bar mitzvah,” Seth Rogen told Variety magazine in July. “We’re excited to see him finally become a man while also helping us raise awareness and funds for people living with Alzheimer’s and towards research that will lead to a cure. And in celebration we’ll also have a mohel and a live bris for James at the event.”

That’s right, together Franco and Rogen used the occasion – and their high profiles – to raise money for a good cause. The bar mitzvah party Rogen planned was scheduled for Oct. 17 at the Hollywood Palladium as part of Rogen and wife Lauren Miller Rogen’s annual Hilarity for Charity’s Variety show. The benefit was to raise money for the Alzheimer’s Association.

“I’m trying to organize a hora, specifically with some Jewish, uh, pop singers,” a giggling Rogen recently told Vulture, referring to the party. “If there’s any singer who’s Jewish, we’re getting them in there. Lisa Loeb. I think HAIM is Jewish, I’m not sure. But yeah, we’ll find them.” Also, Miley Cyrus will reportedly headline the event.

While Hollywood might have big-name acts like those, Greater Cleveland can still party like stars thanks to the wealth of quality vendors that call Northeast Ohio home, many of which have served the community for years.

As is the case in every issue of Bar•Bat Mitzvah, we introduce you to many of these vendors in hopes that their offerings and collective expert advice will help smooth the process of planning your child’s party while also helping make the day of the bar or bat mitzvah meaningful and memorable – whether for a 13- or 37-year-old.

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Bar•Bat Mitzvah // Fall•Winter 2015

Mitzvah Bar•Bat

Editor Michael C. Butz mbutz@cjn.og Art Director Rob J. Ghosh Cleveland Jewish Publication Company Publisher & CEO Kevin S. Adelstein Director of Sales Adam Mandell CJN Managing Editor Bob Jacob Controller Tracy DiDomenico Manager of Digital Marketing Rebecca Fellenbaum Events Manager Gina Lloyd Editorial Kristen Mott Jonah L. Rosenblum Ed Wittenberg Carlo Wolff Violet Spevack Editorial Intern Max Rothstein Advertising Marcia Bakst Paul Bram Ron Greenbaum Andy Isaacs Adam Jacob Nell V. Kirman Sherry Tilson Design Frida Kon Jon Larson Stephen Valentine Business & Circulation Diane Adams Tammie Crawford Abby Royer Subscriber Services 216-342-5185/circulation@cjn.org Display Advertising 216-342-5204/adsales@cjn.org VOL. 139 NO. 50 CLEVELAND JEWISH NEWS (ISSN-00098825) is published weekly with additional issues in January, March, May, June, August, October, November and December by The Cleveland Jewish Publication Company at 23880 Commerce Park, Suite 1, Cleveland, OH 44122-5380. Single copy $1.25.

Periodicals Postage paid at Cleveland, OH., and additional mailing offices. POSTMASTER and additional mailing offices. Send address changes to the Cleveland Jewish News, 23880 Commerce Park, Suite 1, Cleveland, OH 44122-5380

LOOKING BACK

Well-known Northeast Ohioans remember their bar or bat mitzvah

MICHAEL HYMAN Executive director, Mandel JCC

By Carlo Wolff

M

ichael Hyman stands at the lectern of Temple Emanuel in Paterson, N.J. at his bar mitzvah 50 years ago.

The lucky boy later smiles as girls kiss him after his bar mitzvah.

Like most bar mitzvahs, Hyman’s was a family affair. A big one. And a formal one. Until after the ceremony.

Hyman, the executive director of the Mandel Jewish Community Center in Beachwood, conjures scores of kin when he reminisces about his bar mitzvah on May 22, 1965.

“My family at the time was very large, so on the day of my bar mitzvah, they all showed up and the next day, on Sunday, there was a bar mitzvah reception,” he says. “That’s what people did at the time.”

The bar mitzvah itself was very formal; the fun came later.

“The service that Shabbat morning went smoothly, the

8

bar mitzvah reception went smoothly,” he says. “It was very, very formal; this was a Conservative synagogue, and the way that the bar mitzvah was done, all of the bar mitzvah boys – there were no exceptions – you were called up to the Torah for your aliyah.”

Each week, the bar mitzvah boy was the last one called to read one of the seven pieces of the Torah, and then chant a section from the Prophetic Books of the Bible.

After he was called up to read the Torah portion, “I chanted this piece afterward and then didn’t do anything else,” says Hyman, who lives in Beachwood and attends Beachwood Kehilla. “I didn’t learn how to read Torah until a year after my bar mitzvah.”

Temple Emanuel was a large

Bar•Bat Mitzvah // Fall•Winter 2015

Michael Hyman

congregation, with about 1,000 families, and that was the way it presented a bar mitzvah, says Hyman, who left northern New Jersey in 1981 for Buffalo, where he lived until 2003 (he spent 15 of those years as director of the JCC in that northern New York city).

“There was no room for any input or creativity” in the ceremony itself, he says.

Hyman’s bar mitzvah, though routine in its execution, was particularly well attended. His mother was one of 13 siblings, each of whom had a family; his father’s side of the family was smaller.

Hyman got gifts including cash, checks and pens.

And it wasn’t just family that attended; so did his friends from his public school and from the Sunday school at Temple Emanuel.

The after-party, however, is the keeper. It was one of many in a summer that brings back fond memories to Hyman.

“The food was good; catering did a great job, and the band wasn’t bad either,” he says. “They played a lot of the popular music back then from 1965.” Did he dance? “There was dancing,” he says, looking at pictures from the party.

One shows Michael’s smiling face between girls kissing him, one for each cheek. He’s a happy boy. Make that a happy man.

“A lot of it was a social experience,” says Hyman, who moved to the Cleveland area 12 years ago to head the JCC here. “I just remember going through the whole cycle of bar and bat mitzvahs with friends, going from party to party to party every week. It went on for months.

“Our cohort of bar and bat mitzvah kids was probably 40 kids that year,” he says. “You’d just go one week after another.

It was fun. It was just part of the culture, what kids did at the time.” BB

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Fall•Winter 2015 // Bar•Bat Mitzvah 9

Cleveland Jewish News

David Blatt signs a souvenir miniature basketball for Rachel Osherow back in February at the 13th annual Shaw JCC Sports Dinner at the Shaw Jewish Community Center in Akron.

DAVID BLATT Head coach, Cleveland Cavaliers Associated Press

By Jonah L. Rosenblum

I

t’s hard to imagine Cleveland Cavaliers coach David Blatt being nervous. Inserted into a new city, a new country (after coaching and living in Israel for years) and the NBA’s hottest story last year (LeBron James returning to try to bring a championship to Cleveland), Blatt seemed unfazed by the moment.

But even Blatt says he was a little nervous for his bar mitzvah at Temple Beth Am in Framingham, Mass. Calmly sipping soup in an office tucked just behind the actual basketball courts of Cleveland Clinic Courts in Independence, Blatt reflected on what nerves, if any, he felt at his bar mitzvah.

“I think every kid is a little nervous because it’s one of the first times in your life where you actually get up in front of people and you have to perform and you’re expected to do a good job – or your personal

ambition is to do a good job – but I don’t remember being particularly traumatized,” Blatt says. “I remember it being a fun experience, and maybe that is just in my character. I’ve always been someone who doesn’t mind getting up in front of other people and talking.”

Or singing.

It may be hard to believe now, given the hoarse “coach voice” that Blatt carries with him to postgame press conferences, but Blatt said he was a fairly accomplished singer growing up. He sang in the men’s choir,

10 Bar•Bat Mitzvah // Fall•Winter 2015

mixed choir and a cappella through high school.

Years after his successful bar mitzvah performance, Blatt heard his voice on TV and was stunned.

“Since I started coaching, I’ve lost my voice altogether.

Coaching is rough on the vocal cords,” Blatt says. “I heard myself on television the other day. My voice was gruffy and scruffy. I was like, ‘Oh geez, is that you?”

As talented as his voice was and as confident as he was, Blatt didn’t rack up the gifts.

“Let me put it this way, I don’t remember me coming away from my bar mitzvah with my college education in tow,” Blatt says. “Let’s put it that way.”

Part of the reason might be the fact that the Blatt family didn’t have a fancy reception.

They just had people over to the family house.

“Well, usually the size of

the gift goes along with the size of the party,” Blatt says. “My party wasn’t that big so my gifts weren’t that big.”

Blatt finished 53-29 in his first season with the Cavs, a 20-game improvement from Mike Brown’s mark in 2013-2014, guiding them to a sweep in the Eastern Conference Finals and within two games of a national championship.

Blatt, who returned to Israel this summer for a month-plus to enjoy sunny, 90-degree weather every day in the company of his family, was the Euroleague Alexander Gomelskiy Coach of the Year after leading Maccabi Tel Aviv to a stunning upset of Real Madrid for the Euroleague title. He also began his coaching career in Israel, for Hapoel Galil Elyon, and his time at Hapoel Galil Elyon and Maccabi Tel Aviv earned multiple “Israeli League Coach of the Year” honors. BB

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hildren have wondrous imaginations. From a medieval fairytale reception with gilded tablescapes and personalized coats of armor, to an all-star basketball party complete with signed jerseys and slam dunk competition, the design options for a Bar or Bat Mitzvah are endless.

Executive Caterers has the perfect venue for any Bar or Bat Mitzvah party; Landerhaven boasts multiple spectacular spaces which can accommodate from 40 to 1,000 guests. If you really want your event to “rock”, host your party at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame + Museum and enjoy Executive Caterers special menus created by our outstanding chefs. Want to be downtown, try the beautiful English Oak Room in Tower City Center. You can also choose to host the party at your home or any location of your choice; Executive Caterers will make it perfect.

When working with our staff of event planners, remember today’s B’nai Mitzvah events are multi-generational. The Bar or Bat Mitzvah, parents and grandparents all play a vital role. Adults love our tasty action stations; carving, grilling, sautéing or pasta with all the trimmings. The children love our burgers, hot dogs, chicken fingers and the fabulous ice cream sundae bar, but so do the adults who can always be found sampling the kids menu.

Families can work oneon-one with Landerhaven’s in-house designers to bring their ideas to life. From floral arrangements to dramatic lighting and table linens, the designers work with

each family to create a truly memorable event.

“Landerhaven is never the same place twice. We try to give our customer the flexibility to really create a space that makes dreams come alive,” stated Charles Klass, executive vice president.

Just as the design can be customized, so can the menu.

Our chefs create stunning and delectable hors D’oeuvres and entrees that evolve with each season. “I am very proud of how innovative our cuisine and presentations are. The entire team at Executive Caterers is helping customers create the kind of event they have always fantasized,” stated Klass.

Executive Caterers has years of experience with designing and hosting B’nai Mitzvah receptions. Its skilled team can offer advice and guidance to the entire family during the planning process. This includes Friday evening dinners for family and out of town guests, lunches and Sunday brunch.

At Landerhaven, each guest always receives free valet service and parking.

To quote our founder and president, Harlan Diamond, “When people come to us, it becomes part of a public trust that we take very seriously. We appreciate and love being part of their simchas.”

Fall•Winter 2015 // Bar•Bat Mitzvah 11

Kim Cassidy

DAVID GILBERT

David Gilbert enjoys a moment with his wife, Faith, and their daughter, Emily, before Emily’s bat mitzvah in 2010 at Park Synagogue Main in Cleveland Heights.

President and CEO, Greater Cleveland Sports Commission and Destination Cleveland

By Ed Wittenberg

A

s president and CEO of the Greater Cleveland Sports Commission, David Gilbert heads an organization that is responsible for attracting, promoting and managing major amateur athletic events.

But Gilbert’s bar mitzvah, in March 1980 at the old Warrensville Center Synagogue in Cleveland Heights, was hardly a major event. He doesn’t recall how many people attended, only that about 20 of his friends were there.

“It was not as big as a lot of (bar mitzvahs) are today,” he says. “I do have very warm recollections of it being around friends and family.”

Gilbert, who grew up in South Euclid, says his family was not affiliated with a synagogue at the time, so he studied at Cleveland Hebrew Schools, which taught Hebrew to children who did not attend Jewish day schools. His bar mitzvah service was an Orthodox one at Warrensville Center Synagogue, from which Oheb Zedek-Cedar Sinai Synagogue in Lyndhurst derived.

“We certainly were not Orthodox,” he says. “I guess you could say we were Reform.”

So the Orthodox service – with men and women seated separately – was not something Gilbert was used to, and it was a new experience for his friends as well.

“This was probably the first bar mitzvah of our group (of friends) at an Orthodox synagogue,” he says. “I don’t remember a whole lot about the service, but I do remember enjoying doing my Torah portion and thinking it went well.”

Gilbert says a couple people from the congregation came up to him after the service and said they enjoyed his chanting of the prayers.

“I did some theater in junior high and high school, and it was nice that some people came up

12 Bar•Bat Mitzvah // Fall•Winter 2015

and noticed and said they liked it,” he says.

Gilbert also remembers receiving a prayer book as a gift from the synagogue.

“To me that was very meaningful,” he says.

Two bar mitzvah parties followed the service. One was a luncheon, hosted by Gilbert’s parents, Nancy and Leonard Gilbert, with adult friends at Executive Caterers, then located on Chagrin Boulevard in Woodmere. A bowling party at the old bowling alley at Cedar Center in University Heights took place later the same day.

“We had probably 20 kids there, just pizza and bowling,” Gilbert says. “It was far from the real fancy parties we see now, but to me, it was great. Just a very nice time with friends.”

Gilbert, 48, is also president and CEO of Destination Cleveland, the city’s convention and visitors’ bureau, and in April, he was named president and CEO of the Cleveland 2016 Host Committee for the Republican National Convention.

A 1985 graduate of Cleve-

“We had probably 20 kids there, just pizza and bowling.

It was far from the real fancy parties we see now, but to me, it was great. Just a very nice time with friends.”

land Heights High School, he earned a bachelor’s degree in marketing from The Ohio State University in Columbus and an MBA from Cleveland State University.

Gilbert and his wife, Faith, live in Solon with their daughter, Emily, 18, and son, Bradley, 15. They are members of Park Synagogue in Cleveland Heights and Pepper Pike. BB

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Debbie Chessin

DEBBIE CHESSIN

Debbie Chessin, center, is surrounded by family at her son Jordan’s 2008 bar mitzvah.

Director of religious education, Beth Israel – The West Temple

By Carlo Wolff

D

ebbie Chessin learned her lessons well at her bat mitzvah in Johnstown, Pa. Her reminiscences suggest they prepared her for what she’s doing now.

The big date for Chessin was Oct. 20, 1979. Her synagogue, a hybrid, was the Beth Sholom Congregation. Beth Sholom combined the traditions and prayer books of Beth Zion and Rodef Sholom, respectively the Reform and Conservative synagogues a dwindling Jewish population could no longer support.

Chessin suggests she was a good student and calls herself a perfectionist. Not only did she attend Sunday school, she also took two hours of Hebrew each Monday and Wednesday all the way through her bat mitzvah.

Her Pennsylvania congregation had high expectations, she says. Thoroughly schooled by the rabbi and the cantor,

along with parent volunteers who taught the Sunday school classes, Chessin was ready to lead the Shabbat services on her big day.

“It was more than just reading the tropes,” the music symbols in the Torah, she says, speaking of the rabbi with affection. “He actually taught me how to read music.

“I led the entire service, Shabbat service followed by Havdalah,” she adds. “I read or chanted most of the prayers, mostly in Hebrew with some English, and chanted from the Torah.” While there was no haftorah, she chanted four to six aliyot, had a d’var Torah, “and we had a party in the social hall at the temple.”

The service went well. Aside

14 Bar•Bat Mitzvah // Fall•Winter 2015

from thinking her voice was too high – “Maybe my voice was different then” – Chessin doesn’t recall making any mistakes “because I am a perfectionist by nature.

“I worked so hard preparing for it, I can tell you I did not make any mistakes, like in my pronunciation, my chanting, my anything.”

The party went well, too.

About 180 people joined in, and Chessin had fun with kids she knew from Beth Sholom, Sunday school and other parts of the community.

Things were different then.

Today, kids get cash at their

mitzvah party, Chessin says.

Back then, Israel bonds were big, as were checks and jewelry.

Chessin got jewelry with a Star of David, along with earrings.

She also received some Israel bonds, “and some money which I saved for college.”

As for her party moves, Chessin conjures the Bee Gees and John Travolta.

“It was 1979. Remember ‘Saturday Night Fever’? We had taken a lot of line dancing in school, mostly just line dancing with girls and boys together. I was a pretty shy kid.”

Except for when she was behind a lectern. BB

“It was 1979. Remember ‘Saturday Night Fever’? We had taken a lot of line dancing in school, mostly just line dancing with girls and boys together. I was a pretty shy kid.”

VOLUNTEER VICTORIES

Friendship Circle of Cleveland’s Mitzvah Volunteer Program leads to winning relationships between teens and special-needs children

By Jonah L. Rosenblum Friendship Circle of Cleveland

D

oing mitzvahs came naturally to Stuart Spiegel’s daughter, Elana. So joining the Mitzvah Volunteer Program at Friendship Circle of Cleveland in early 2015 made perfect sense for the Beachwood resident following her Memorial Day 2014 bat mitzvah.

For Elana and many other Greater Cleveland youth, the Mitzvah Volunteer Program is a gateway that can become a lifetime of helping those with special needs.

“Thank God my daughter is a giving person and she loves doing mitzvahs,” Spiegel says.

“This is just something that she really wanted to do. She is a natural with kids, so this was just a perfect match for her.”

The Mitzvah Volunteer Program was started in 2013 and has been growing ever since.

Each year, there are multiple sessions, each of which begins

in a classroom as about 15 pre-teens and teenagers like Spiegel have four classes where they watch films and learn about various disabilities. They even simulate having certain disabilities, to get a sense of what that is like.

“We don’t train teenagers,” points out Rabbi Yossi Marozov, Friendship Circle of Cleveland executive director. “You don’t train someone to be a friend. You educate them on some of the needs that the children have that you can work with in developing a friendship.”

There’s a lot to learn. Friend-

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ship Circle of Cleveland helps children with a wide variety of diagnoses, including Down syndrome, cerebral palsy, autism, Asperger’s syndrome, attention deficit disorder (ADD) and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). Academic learning complete, volunteers are prepared to begin interacting with those with special needs.

For those imagining a dimly lit cafeteria table with volunteers on one side and children with special needs on the other engaged in hushed, awkward banter, think again.

Volunteers and children with special needs may enjoy the services of a music therapist together, joyously singing and playing instruments. They may do an art project together. They might play a game straight out of gym class – or they might play a board game.

Throughout, valuable lessons are imparted.

For the child with special needs, it’s a chance to learn from someone who isn’t Mom or Dad. “The child participant is learning about taking turns, waiting for their turn, keeping focus on the game, how to win and how to lose. Those are important skills,” says Rena Wertheim, program administrator at the Friendship Circle of Cleveland. “Everything’s better when it’s with a friend, so leading by example with a similar-agedpeer model, it just seems to strike a chord with participants.”

For the volunteer, it’s more than just a few Sunday classes or a summer. It’s more than The President’s Volunteer Service Award, complete with a letter from the president, which participants may be eligible for. It’s more than burnishing

Mitzvah Volunteer Program exercises demonstrate to participants what it feels like to be handicapped, according to Friendship Circle of Cleveland. For example, participants wear rubber gloves while trying to button a shirt, which demonstrates the daily challenges children with cerebral palsy face. These exercises promote positive attitudes and empathy toward children with special needs. the college résumé, though it achieves that end, too. Many have actually gone on to become behavioral therapists or special-education teachers.

“We have seen incredible growth in the teenagers that take the time to do this type of volunteer work,” Marozov says.

“Some of the teenagers get career-focused based on the work that they’ve done here.”

For all those reasons and more, Wertheim says that she has seen success as she recruits volunteers at local congregations and day schools.

“There were some who were interested,” Wertheim says. “I’m expecting some of them will sign up.”

New perspectives Ultimately, it doesn’t really matter whether participants ever

become special-needs teachers, because at the end of the day, the Mitzvah Volunteer Program is about perception as much as anything else.

Disabilities are uncomfortable and scary for many. People don’t know whether to be sympathetic or act normal, to ignore differences or address them. Simply put, people don’t know how to interact with those who have special needs.

So the chance to teach pre-teenagers and teenagers, like those entering the Mitzvah Volunteer Program, at a critical juncture in their lives is priceless.

Teenagers can be horribly mean, bullying those who are different from them, but they can also be incredibly openminded, and many have hearts of gold.

“Today’s teenagers get a bad

MVP: How to get involved Several opportunities exist for 12- and 13-year-olds to sign up for the Mitzvah Volunteer Program.

The next three upcoming sessions are as follows: • Nov. 2, 9, 16 and 23, with a volunteer experience Dec. 6 • Jan. 4, 11, 25 and Feb. 8, with a volunteer experience Jan. 18 or Feb. 15 • May 2, 9, 16 and 23, with a volunteer experience May 26 Sessions are held from 6 to 7 p.m. those days at Friendship Circle of Cleveland’s facility at 27900 Gates Mills Blvd. in Pepper Pike. For more information or to register, contact program administrator Rena Wertheim at 216-377-3000 ext. 1008 or Rena@FriendsCleveland.com.

rap,” Marozov says. “Teenagers are an army of good waiting to be unleashed. Friendship Circle harnesses that energy.”

That’s what makes the Mitzvah Volunteer Program so exciting for many of the people who actually run it. This is a chance to shape the next generation. This is a chance to create more and more people who actually get it, who actually feel comfortable engaging with those who are different from them.

As Wertheim says, this is about “showing them that a person with a disability is a person first.”

“I just think (Elana) was exposed to a lot of different kids at this camp,” Spiegel says. “She saw stuff that she’s never seen before, so I think it was an eyeopening experience for her.”

And those lessons truly last a lifetime.

“We often put people in silos, disabled and non-disabled,” says Tom Sudow, who is on the board of directors of Friendship Circle of Cleveland. “What this does is it really humanizes people with disabilities and it educates the typical child, so as they do this, they never really look at a disabled person the same again.”

And so there is a tie between the Mitzvah Volunteer Program and the bar or bat mitzvah itself, even though any pre-teen is welcome to join, whether they can read haftorah or not. After all, the bar or bat mitzvah is all about becoming a man or a woman.

That, to some extent, has been regarded as a parlor joke, because any parent knows (or at least hopes) that their child at 12 isn’t the same as their child at 22 or 32. Indeed, brain development carries on for many years after the bar or bat mitzvah.

But the bar or bat mitzvah does perhaps mark the beginning of truly growing up – and this is a way to help determine the child’s path.

Children may come in saying, “They’re weird.” or “They’re different.”

That can be changed in an instant.

“We don’t train teenagers. You don’t train someone to be a friend. You educate them on some of the needs that the children have that you can work with in developing a friendship.”

– Rabbi Yossi Marozov Executive director Friendship Circle of Cleveland “(Volunteers) start to see them as people,” Sudow says.

“That’s a very, very positive thing.”

Marozov is in a position where he gets to see much of the feedback sent in by program volunteers.

He says that words and terms that come up are “transformative” and “characterbuilding” and “the most amazing experience they’ve ever had.”

“For many teenagers that get involved in Friendship Circle, it’s truly transformative to them,” Marozov says.

But beyond the critical “lessons” they carry on, they hopefully have a good time. For the volunteers, the program can become a deeply social environment. Many come with classmates or neighbors. It’s a chance to create new friendships and deepen existing ones.

And for the kids they serve, it ultimately comes down to one incredibly valuable concept: friendship.

The reality for many with special needs is they need friends as much as anyone, perhaps more, but all too frequently, they go without, in part because their peers may not know how to interact with them.

And that’s where Friendship Circle and girls like Elana Spiegel come in.

“Our job is to step in and fill the void,” Marozov says. BB

Fall•Winter 2015 // Bar•Bat Mitzvah 17

Bar/Bat Mitzvah of ________________________________________ Date ___________________________________________ Caterer ________________________________________ Venue Location _________________________________ Party Planner/Decorator _________________________ DATE

2-3 years before _________ Contact synagogue to set date _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________

1 year before Begin formal bar/bat mitzvah lessons Discuss community or mitzvah project Determine budget If the ceremony will be in Israel, find travel agent who can arrange location and rabbi Find vendors: videographer/photographer, party planner, caterers, DJ, band, florist, venues Contact hotels and decide where to book blocks of rooms Create list of out-of-towners to be invited Send save-the-date reminders

10 months before _________ Have bar/bat mitzvah child meet party planner, if using one, to give input on decorations 8 months before _________ Create guest list with complete addresses 7 months before _________ Begin to look at invitations _________ Decide on wording for invitations _________ Decide arrangements to transport kids to and from party _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________

6 months before Order invitations, thank-you notes Create maps, directions sheets Pick calligraphy style for envelopes Order informals Order yarmulkes Find child’s tallit Begin to plan menu

4 months before _________ Weigh invitation at post office _________ Choose and purchase postage stamps

DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT! BRING THE

DJ/Band/Entertainment __________________________ Photographer ___________________________________ Videographer ___________________________________ Hotel Block _____________________________________ DATE 3 months before _________ Take invitations to calligrapher, print mailing labels _________ Work on second mailing _________ Discuss valet _________ Decide on hotel room gift bags for out-of-town guests _________ Select clothing for family members _________ Finalize menu _________ Decide on centerpieces and sign-in board 2 months before _________ Mail out-of-town invitations _________ Make hair appointments for family for the week before the event 6 weeks before _________ Mail in-town invitations _________ Send second mailing to out-of-towners _________ _________ _________ _________ _________

4 weeks before Reconfirm with service providers Put together seating plan Have child practice speech out loud Set up rehearsal time with synagogue Put together gift baskets for out-of-town guests

3 weeks before _________ Work with caterer on floor plan and plan agenda for the event 2 Tuesdays before _________ Order any necessary kosher dinners 2 Wednesdays before _________ Assign tables _________ Personalize gift bags, if desired Weekend before _________ Finalize guest count/seating as best you can Monday before _________ Finalize seating cards Day before _________ Deliver gift bags to hotels

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Fall•Winter 2015 // Bar•Bat Mitzvah 19

Advertorial Cleveland Jewish News

PARTY

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PartyPalooza 2015, on Nov. 8, celebrates 20 years of sharing unique party planning ideas with the community

By Sherri Foxman of Party411 Events

20 Bar•Bat Mitzvah // Fall•Winter 2015

R

egardless of whether there is a party or special event in your immediate future, you won’t want to miss the 20th Annual PartyPalooza, where everyone in the business gets together to promote services, products and special effects.

The result is one huge party/ special event/celebration, where you’ll be entertained, fed and given some of the best day-ofshow discounts for your next event that you will find all year.

Food abounds from caterers across town as well as from 700 Beta Banquet & Conference Center, the host of this year’s PartyPalooza. The latest trends will be on display, and the newest of the new will be there to tell you who and what they are all about. In fact, you’ll be able to plan your event from start

PartyPalooza WHAT: 20th Annual PartyPalooza WHEN: 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. Sunday, Nov. 8, 2015 WHERE: 700 Beta Banquet & Conference Center in Mayfield Village INFO: Sherri Foxman, Party411 Events, 216-514-8411 or partygirl@party411.com to finish without ever leaving this beautiful party center and venue. If you haven’t seen it, it’s a must!

With the Republican National Convention coming, and with all the new hotels, Cleveland is attracting the best of the best, from chefs to ballrooms. So, many new vendors – with new products, venues and unique distractions – have joined our ranks in the last year. I find it fascinating. Party411 Events (especially me) spends an inordinate amount of time poring over trade magazines and going to tradeshows (from east to west) just to find out what’s

new, what’s going on, and how we can bring it to Cleveland – as do the other event planners in Cleveland.

Not that Cleveland doesn’t have an abundance of talented folks, because it does. But there’s now more to choose from, and many of these vendors will be represented at PartyPalooza.

Creativity will ooze from each and every booth.

Food isn’t just food anymore, it’s entertainment – and how you display it is 50 percent of the appeal.

Music isn’t just music anymore, it’s working with a knowledgeable person that “gets” what you want and knows how to work it.

Invitations have become their own art form, and depending on what you are celebrating, you may need a variety for a full weekend.

Entertainment isn’t just a band or DJ, it’s also walking champagne dresses, living statues, unusual distractions like an ice bar complete with carver, or a bartender who puts on a show.

We even have someone who does strolling blackjack!

When you plan a party, wedding or corporate event, you need myriad items. Well, get your list ready because you’ll be able to check off everything in one day.

Not only that, as I previously mentioned, many (and I mean many) of the vendors will have show specials – discounts that you can realize by visiting their booth. A list of those specials will be in the Nov. 6 issue of the Cleveland Jewish News so you can come prepared. In other words, “Have I got a deal for you!”

You’ll find everything there: invitations, welcome baskets for your hotel room guests (it’s the right thing to do no matter the event), venue and/or caterers, transportation, musicians/DJs, lighting and special effects, linens and other entertainment, as mentioned above.

Creativity, for me, is No. 1.

The best part of the event is planning it, whether my client chooses to do it all or pieces and parts – or not at all. The time I’ve spent just sitting at my computer

concocting all sorts of ideas and scenarios fulfills that need in me to outdo myself (knowing full well it may be too over the top).

For example, next week I’m doing a Living Red Carpet. In other words, a 50-foot red carpet that is the train of a beautiful model’s dress – and she’s there to greet you when you get to the end.

Don’t let me scare you, though. You can do as little or as much as you want (theme or no theme) and spend as little or as much as you want (most of our vendors can meet your budget).

Plan two years in advance or

three weeks in advance, they have all been through these doors. (I was just recently given a corporate event for 400 with 10 days to plan.) The vendors at PartyPalooza will help you do it all.

Circle the calendar for 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. Sunday, Nov. 8, 2015 at 700 Beta Banquet & Conference Center in Mayfield Village (at the Wilson Mills Road exit of I-271) to get started. I’ll be around if you want some free advice or just want to gab while doing tastings and dancing to the music.

See you then!

Fall•Winter 2015 // Bar•Bat Mitzvah 21

Executive Caterers at Landerhaven

The responsible

parties Parents and families are charged with the monumental task of party planning, but with these expert tips, they can take charge of the process

By Kristen Mott

22 Bar•Bat Mitzvah // Fall•Winter 2015

W

hile a bar or bat mitzvah is a momentous occasion for a young boy or girl, planning the reception can sometimes turn into an overwhelming process for parents.

From booking a venue to selecting a theme to coming up with unique favors, it’s easy to get caught up in the details.

“I attack a bar or bat mitzvah with the same voracity I would a wedding,” says Jennifer Hartman, owner and lead event coordinator of Heart 2 Heart Occasions. “You still need a venue, photographer, food menu and all the rentals. Having an overall vision for the party is probably the most helpful thing.”

To take some of the stress out of the planning process, Hartman, along with Lauren Klein, director of marketing and special events at Zip City USA, and Michael Ferrara, event planner and designer at Executive Caterers at Landerhaven, share their tips for how to create a fun and memorable reception.

Early Bookings Out of all the components involved with planning a bar or bat mitzvah reception, one aspect should be decided on first: the venue.

“The venue is the most important. You have to book that far in advance because those fill up quickly,” Klein says.

Since many times the date for a bar or bat mitzvah is known far in advance, Ferrara recommends booking a venue as far as two years out, especially if the place is a popular location for b’nai mitzvah or weddings.

Once a venue is selected, the next component to tackle is hiring a DJ or entertainment company, Ferrara says.

“Once those two things are solidified and booked, the actual planning process of all the

Bar•Bat Mitzvah 23

details and so forth really don’t have to start within a year of the event,” he says.

While everyone’s financial situation is different, Hartman says it’s key to set a budget early on in the process.

“If a family is strict about keeping to a budget, that needs to be the first thing they decide on even before booking a venue, since the budget would dictate the venue they choose,” she explains. “If their finances allow them to be a little more flexible, they can find their perfect venue first and then tailor everything to that.”

Amanda Lu / Executive Caterers at Landerhaven

Choosing a theMe Parents typically handle most of the details of planning a bar or bat mitzvah reception, but Ferrara says it’s important to get the children involved in the process as well, especially when it comes to selecting a theme.

“You have to get in their heads and see and envision their dream,” he says. “Then you can move forward and it’s all about making that dream come true while staying within a budget.”

Basketball themes have become very popular over the last year, especially with the return of LeBron James to the Cleveland Cavaliers, Ferrara says.

Other times, a boy or girl may not have a specific theme in mind so they choose a general concept instead.

“We’ve done something like a ‘Club Nathan’ theme, which allows us to create an upbeat atmosphere with a lot of lighting. It’s edgy and cool without adhering to one particular theme,” he says.

Glow themes are the most requested at Zip City, Klein says.

The lights are dimmed and the guests are given glow sticks to wear throughout the reception.

“It makes for a really fun environment. When the kids are on the zip line or jumping on the trampoline, you see bright lights going everywhere, which is really cool,” she says.

Instead of working with a particular theme, Hartman

Amy Ann Photography / Executive Caterers at Landerhaven

says many parents tailor the event to a certain hobby their child is interested in, which makes the event more personal.

She’s also noticed a change in color schemes being requested.

Rather than bright neon colors, which has been the trend the last couple years, she’s now seeing richer color palettes, including gold, navy, purple and teal.

ConteMporary Menus While chicken fingers and fries or pasta and salad may have been popular fare for a bar or bat mitzvah in the past, today’s children have much more evolved palates, Ferarra says.

24 Bar•Bat Mitzvah // Fall•Winter 2015

“A lot of these kids are more sophisticated, and in some cases they’ve traveled a lot, so they’ve seen things and tasted things that years ago kids didn’t do.

That’s reflected in the food they want,” he says.

Ferrara says many of his clients request healthier or unique foods, such as sushi or grilled items. Instead of a soft drink bar, he’s created tables featuring different types of infused waters, such as citrus water or cucumber water.

Since Zip City is an activityfocused venue, Klein says her clients normally request gourmet finger foods, which makes it

easy for kids to snack throughout the event.

As far as dessert, both Ferrara and Klein agree that ice cream bars remain the most popular.

At Landerhaven, Ferrara takes the concept up a notch.

“I have this 13-foot boat that looks like a big canoe, and at some parties I’ve filled the entire thing with ice and put hundreds of ice cream balls in it and all the toppings. We put it on a table with wheels and we literally roll it out with sparklers and fanfare and the DJ plays this big crazy number. It’s almost like we’re in Las Vegas. The kids go crazy,” he says.

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216 Image / Lauren Klein / Zip City

Favors galore Over the past year, Hartman says edible favors have grown tremendously in popularity.

“I always say unless the favor is really usable, people aren’t going to keep it. But people will eat almost anything,” she says.

Many bar and bat mitzvahs Hartman works with incorporate do-it-yourself stations at the reception. For instance, guests may be able to make their own caramel apple with different toppings to take home with them to enjoy later.

Ferrara says he has noticed a similar trend, such as with gourmet popcorn tables.

“We do this huge table with glass vessels filled with popcorn with all these psychedelic colors and flavors. It’s very appealing to the eyes. People get to make their own take-home bags,” he says.

Photos have always been popular favors for b’nai mitzvah receptions. Instead of a typical photo booth, though, Hartman says she has seen more events incorporating a photographer to take photos of guests in front of a backdrop or a green screen.

“People want something unique where it’s more of an experience or an activity that guests get to do instead of just taking home a favor that’s put on the table,” she says.

Keeping your cool While planning a bar or bat mitzvah reception can sometimes feel as overwhelming as planning a wedding, Ferrara cautions parents not to overcomplicate things.

“Parents can get so wrapped up in all the details that they miss out on enjoying the event,” he says. “We deal with busy

26 Bar•Bat Mitzvah // Fall•Winter 2015

people who travel the world and they want to make sure everything is going to be right and done in an orderly, smooth, professional manner. Our expertise is to reassure and calm nerves.”

To relieve some of the stress, Hartman recommends hiring a planner or working with someone who has industry experience.

“Planners are a lot more affordable than people think they are, and the amount of time we save people is invaluable,” she says. “You have the peace of mind knowing there’s someone there to make sure things don’t fall apart, and if something does happen, we have a Plan B and Plan C in place already.”

For people who forego planners, Hartman suggests taking a step back and not panicking if something happens to go awry.

“Assess the situation and remain calm, which is not always easy, but it’s very important,” she says. “If it’s a vendor issue, there are always other vendors.

In the grand scheme of things, it may not be as big of a deal as it is in your mind until you step back.” BB

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A lot of time and effort goes into planning a bar or bat mitzvah, and along the way, many questions are certain to arise. Thankfully for area families, Greater Cleveland is home to many professionals with the experience and know-how to help answer those questions and offer advice.

Compiled by Taylor Rosen

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STATIONERY

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AMY WAIN GARNITZ

OWNER | THE A.L. WAIN COMPANY SHAKER HEIGHTS WHAT’S THE MOST IMPORTANT THING TO CONSIDER? Try to stay focused on the meaning of the bar or bat mitzvah. Many times the parents get lost in making it “cool” and they lose sight of the underlying purpose of the mitzvah. The celebration is a wonderful thing and should be joyous. But the main event is the temple service and the connection to the Torah and that individual’s family. It’s a marvelous achievement for these young children to be able to read from the Torah, and it signifies their ability to take on the world.

WHAT ELSE SHOULD PARENTS CONSIDER? One of the biggest mistakes I see made by the parents who plan their son’s or daughter’s bar or bat mitzvah is budgeting the

ceremony. You need to budget your expenses for this type of event. It costs a substantial amount of money to plan and have a bar or bat mitzvah.

Parents must thoroughly plan the way their money will be spent in order to maximize the potential of the mitzvah without having to dig into their savings unexpectedly.

WHAT TRENDS ARE YOU SEEING? Over the past few years, I have noticed a big swing in trends at a bar or bat mitzvah ceremony.

Not so long ago, the parents preferred to make it more about the colors and designing of the ceremony. They were looking for things that were “in fashion” that they could include at their son’s or daughter’s ceremony, but now it’s completely different.

I have noticed the majority of

32 Bar•Bat Mitzvah // Fall•Winter 2015

my clients are now choosing to include Judaic themes for the ceremony, and more people have decided to print the invitations using Hebrew as opposed to English. They are also leaning toward the letterpress invitations rather than flat or raised lettering.

WHEN SHOULD PEOPLE START PLANNING? You want to start planning as

soon as you possibly can. This is an event you just can’t put off until a month before because of how much goes into planning a bar or bat mitzvah. If you choose to wait, you could end up missing out on key elements and/ or aspects of the ceremony. For example, I’ve seen clients bring in a form of entertainment for the kids, but if they don’t plan properly it would be difficult to schedule any form of entertainment in a timely fashion. BB

“I have noticed the majority of my clients are now choosing to include Judaic themes for the ceremony, and more people have decided to print the invitations using Hebrew as opposed to English.”

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Both Locations Open to the Community Gifts Galore from Israel’s Fine Judaica Artists · Sterling silver or colorful Magen David, Chamsa and Chai necklaces · Candlesticks & kiddush cups · Tzedakah boxes & Torah pointers · Chanukiot, Mezzuzot and collectible dreidels · Crafts from Cleveland’s sister city of Beit She’an and from Yad Lakashish (Lifeline for the Old) in Jerusalem Large selection of tallitot from Israel in many colors, fabrics and sizes. At Mandel JCC only.

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ENTERTAINMENT

BSA Events and Entertainment

BERNIE STEVENS

VICE PRESIDENT OF EVENTS | BSA EVENTS AND ENTERTAINMENT | CHAGRIN FALLS WHAT’S THE MOST IMPORTANT THING TO CONSIDER? You want to ensure that the child is involved in the process.

Parents can offer their insight on what they think is appropriate for the ceremony, but if the kids are really involved in the whole decision-making process, it will make the ceremony better for them. It enables the children to take ownership of the event,

which should go a long way in it turning out the way they hoped it would.

WHAT ELSE SHOULD PARENTS CONSIDER? Making sure they’ve hired a company that is reputable. You want to ensure the company you’ve hired for the mitzvah is creative and can bring all of the required elements to the table.

“If there is some sort of entertainment they must have for the mitzvah, they’ll need to schedule it as soon as possible. You should never risk missing out on something because of a lack of preparation.”

34 Bar•Bat Mitzvah // Fall•Winter 2015

I’ve seen parents end up in disputes with a company because of the service it provided on the day of the mitzvah. Some of these businesses make false promises they cannot keep. So it’s your job as the parent to pick the correct company that fits the needs of the ceremony you’re planning.

WHAT TRENDS ARE YOU SEEING? The kids are looking for interactive types of entertainment. I think there’s a lot more interactive entertainment other than just the dance facilitators. That’s a big thing right now. Some parents have even gone out of

their way to hire a private disc jockey for the ceremony. That’s something we’ve seen happen more often recently.

WHEN SHOULD PEOPLE START PLANNING? Once they have the date of their bar or bat mitzvah, and they have the reception date, they should begin to plan as soon as they possibly can. If there is some sort of entertainment they must have for the mitzvah, they’ll need to schedule it as soon as possible. You should never risk missing out on something because of a lack of preparation. BB

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FLORAL

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BRANDON SITLER

OWNER | URBAN ORCHID | CLEVELAND’S LITTLE ITALY AND OHIO CITY NEIGHBORHOODS WHAT’S THE MOST IMPORTANT THING TO CONSIDER? The most important decision to make after you have the date set for your event is the overall theme of the party. There are many things to consider here: Will it be a daytime or evening event? Will it be children only or a mix of ages? Will the food be kosher or nonkosher? Once these decisions are made, you can move on to the overall theme, which will in turn help you determine what type of lo-

cation is appropriate. In general you want to choose a theme and location that make your guests (and especially the guest of honor) feel comfortable.

WHAT ELSE SHOULD PARENTS CONSIDER? Parents need to remember this event is first and foremost a celebration of their child’s transition into adulthood. The child needs to be made part of the planning process so their individual style and personal-

“As an event florist we have been replacing traditional centerpieces with tablescapes that incorporate the child’s favorite sports, hobbies, movies or travel experiences.”

36 Bar•Bat Mitzvah // Fall•Winter 2015

ity is reflected in the celebration. Many times you see the parents making it more about themselves instead of the child, and that’s not what a mitzvah celebration is about. Letting your kid be involved in the planning and decision-making process will make his or her day that much better.

WHAT TRENDS ARE YOU SEEING? Popular trends I’m noticing right now are self-service candy buffets, food trucks, photo booths and customized websites/ hashtags. Including social media is something I have noticed a lot recently because of how much the kids use these days.

As an event florist we have been

replacing traditional centerpieces with tablescapes that incorporate the child’s favorite sports, hobbies, movies or travel experiences.

WHEN SHOULD PEOPLE START PLANNING? You want to start planning as soon as possible. It takes a lot of time when planning for a mitzvah, so putting it off until a later date is not your best option. I’d say a year in advance is customary. There are limited event venues and they book fast. The larger your party, the fewer options there are, so you need time to find the perfect time and place to have the mitzvah. BB

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Acacia Reservation • 26899 Cedar Rd. 216.342.4767• dinoscatering.com We also cater at Pine Ridge Country Club and Manakiki Golf Club Kosher available through Davis Catering

Fall•Winter 2015 // Bar•Bat Mitzvah 37

CATERING

Augostino’s Catering & Event Center

“You can run to Google or Pinterest and have all these grand ideas, but then you might find out it’s just not in the budget. So then you sit down with your catering professional and give them your budget and let them use their experience in helping you plan.”

ERIN SCHILLO

SALES AND MARKETING MANAGER AUGOSTINO’S CATERING AND EVENTS CENTER | BROOKLYN, OHIO WHAT’S THE MOST IMPORTANT THING TO CONSIDER? There are probably two answers: budget and theme. The budget is most in part because you need to set realistic goals on what you can get. You can run to Google or Pinterest and have all these grand ideas, but then you might find out it’s just not in the budget. So then you sit down with your catering professional and give them your budget and let them use their experience in helping you plan. The theme is important,

too. Everyone wants to have a good theme, something unique and different – and there are different and creative things you can do with your food that can be worked into your theme that really pull everything together.

you could probably do this.

Location is very much important. It’s neat to do an event in a barn, but logistically you have to realize you need a mobile kitchen because there’s no kitchen, and you might need a tent if it rains.

WHAT ELSE SHOULD PARENTS CONSIDER?

WHAT TRENDS ARE YOU SEEING?

The logistics behind things – but that’s what we’re here to do, to help them through when to do this, how to do that, and why you can’t do this but why

People want unique, something that not only looks very different but is very tasty as well. People are trending to go with smaller, more intimate parties, so they

38 Bar•Bat Mitzvah // Fall•Winter 2015

get to spend their money on the design aspect of it rather than have 50 more people in attendance. They can get upgraded linens and centerpieces and make it a more intimate, personal affair.

WHEN SHOULD PEOPLE START PLANNING? As soon as they get the date.

You want to solidify your date, and you want to make sure the caterer you’ve chosen is available – and go from there. BB

PHOTOGRAPHY

Kim Ponsky Photography

KIM PONSKY

OWNER | KIM PONSKY PHOTOGRAPHY | WOODMERE WHAT’S THE MOST IMPORTANT THING TO CONSIDER? The most important things to consider are the parts and pieces that leave a lasting impression. The sentiment of the synagogue portion is what the mitzvah is actually about.

But when you’re planning and

picking your vendors, you need to think along the lines of what is going to make it memorable to look back on 20 to 30 years from now? That, along with the pieces that contribute to the overall enjoyment of the day, are the two balancing acts that need to be considered when planning.

“(W)hen you’re planning and picking your vendors, you need to think along the lines of what is going to make it memorable to look back on 20 to 30 years from now? That, along with the pieces that contribute to the overall enjoyment of the day, are the two balancing acts that need to be considered when planning.”

40 Bar•Bat Mitzvah // Fall•Winter 2015

WHAT ELSE SHOULD PARENTS CONSIDER? It’s easy to get caught up in the competitive nature of throwing the bigger and better party, but the aspects of planning it should be reflective of that child’s personality and interests.

Themes that reflect the personality of the child who is having the mitzvah are among the first things you should consider.

WHAT TRENDS ARE YOU SEEING? I’m seeing more of the kids giving back and foregoing the big, elaborate parties for the charitable gift requests and a trip to Israel with a small celebration in lieu of the party. Technology is also playing a larger role than

it did just a few years ago. The majority of kids these days want the latest and greatest technology in their lives and you see it regularly at mitzvah ceremonies.

WHEN SHOULD PEOPLE START PLANNING? It depends on what your priorities are and what you view as important when planning the ceremony. The entertainment aspect is something you want to plan as far ahead as possible.

I think there is no such thing as too soon when it comes to booking the vendors that will be of the most value to you. If you wait too long you and your child could end up missing out on a specific vendor you were relying on. BB

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If You Can’t Beat Them, Join Them. You’ve spent three months searching for a 3D virtual reality roller coaster because you saw one at your cousin’s bat mitzvah in New Jersey – and no one in Cleveland has ever had one at their party. Then your kid comes home from a party and politely tells you that everyone this year has had a social media photo booth and they want one too. Sometimes the best options are the ones you know are a sure thing.

Be Different. We know, we know. We just said that if you can’t beat them, join them - but Rock The House has more than 40 extra entertainment options to keep things fresh. If you’d like to do something unique and different, ask about options beyond the most popular ones. There truly is something for everyone!

Do Me a Favor, Will You? There are two categories of extra entertainment: Those that yield a customized party favor that guests take home, and those that don’t. While favor-based activities like personalized magazine covers, photo booths, or customized airbrushed T-shirts are more expensive than favor-less activities, they can often save money in the long run.

When Is Enough, Enough? If half of your guests are on the dance floor at any given time, what should the other half be doing? Plan your entertainment and extras accordingly! Choose enough activities such as multi-player games and faster options to avoid long lines and keep guests engaged. The goal is to keep everyone busy and entertained – on and off the dance floor!

Smiles Are Contagious. When choosing activities, pick a few that really resonate with the guest of honor!

If your son or daughter loves every activity and option, they’re less likely to become bored or worried about whether their friends are enjoying themselves.

Friends often feed off of the energy of the celebrant, and if they’re having a great time, so will their friends!

“Rock The House has more than 40 extra entertainment options”

These are just a few simple examples of the care RTH takes when recommending extra entertainment.

We make it look easy (and make you look good) because we serve to understand what your event goals are while integrating the very latest and best in extra entertainment. Contact RTH today to learn about even more amazing opportunities! You didn’t think we’d give you all of our ideas in one article, did you?

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Fall•Winter 2015 // Bar•Bat Mitzvah 41

SYNAGOGUES

John, Becky, Noa and Rabbi Sharon Young Marcus during Noa’s 2014 bat mitzvah at Park Synagogue Main in Cleveland Heights.

Ruth DeCurtis

RABBI SHARON YOUNG MARCUS

ASSOCIATE RABBI | THE PARK SYNAGOGUE | CLEVELAND HEIGHTS AND PEPPER PIKE WHAT’S THE MOST IMPORTANT THING TO CONSIDER? I think the most important things to consider or remember are the needs and interests of the child. With the many details of the celebration, including managing family coming in from out of town, it’s easy to lose sight of the celebration’s goal – your child reaching the important religious milestone of becoming a bar or bat mitzvah!

Make sure it does not become a day about the parents, grandmothers or friends – it’s about the child. Do what’s feasible and appropriate for this kind of religious ceremony within

your family context. It’s not about what your neighbors did; celebrate in a style that’s right for your family.

WHAT ELSE SHOULD PARENTS CONSIDER? Many schools in our area keep lists of their students’ upcoming bar or bat mitzvah dates. Be sure to contact the school, or parent representative, when you receive a date from your synagogue so there is no conflict with your child’s friends. I have seen many children disappointed over conflicts in b’nai mitzvah dates.

“One very touching trend I see during the ceremony is the parents taking time to speak to their child from the heart.”

42 Bar•Bat Mitzvah // Fall•Winter 2015

WHAT TRENDS ARE YOU SEEING? One very touching trend I see during the ceremony is the parents taking time to speak to their child from the heart. Another trend is integrating the child’s interest into the celebration. I’ve seen themes of cooking, sports, animals, camp, and many more that help the child feel proud of all their accomplishments. These interests can be tied into mitzvah or community service projects to encourage philanthropy. When we acknowledge and celebrate what our young people are passionate about, the more likely they will stay engaged throughout their lives.

WHEN SHOULD PEOPLE START PLANNING? The bar or bat mitzvah day is

merely one point in a young person’s long journey of living life as a Jew. Ideally, children will be exposed to the rituals and prayers beginning at a young age. Then as they grow older, they will progress to reading Hebrew and learning more about our rich traditions. Encouraging your children to participate in services, home rituals, youth groups, or attending a Jewish day school or getting a supplementary education, will give them an excellent foundation.

The more comfortable your child is with Hebrew, and the structure and meaning of the service, the more comfortable he or she will be on their big day. With time well spent in synagogue activities, they’ll look out at the crowd attending the service and know they’re among “family.” BB

GAME TIME

The market for entertainment- and gamebased venues is growing in Northeast Ohio, leading to plenty of options for bar and bat mitzvah parties

P

By Ed Wittenberg

arents looking for a more playful or adventurous option for their child’s bar or bat mitzvah party may want to try Punch Bowl Social in Cleveland or WhirlyBall in Bedford Heights.

Punch Bowl Social – a 27,000-square-foot restaurant, bar and entertainment complex – opened Sept. 19 in Cleveland’s Flats East Bank. It hosted its first bar mitzvah recently, and General Manager Rossi Penney anticipates there will be many more.

“We have a space available to accommodate up to 1,000 people for private events,” Penney says. “We offer buyouts for the facility – you can buy the entire place out – and we also have smaller areas that can accommodate 50 to 100 people. We’re diverse to the point where we can host up to seven or eight smaller groups on one day.”

44 Bar•Bat Mitzvah // Fall•Winter 2015

Punch Bowl Social

Fall•Winter 2015 // Bar•Bat Mitzvah 45

WhirlyBall

Punch Bowl Social

Entertainment options at Punch Bowl Social are also diverse.

They include a 1980s-style arcade, two private karaoke rooms, foosball, Skee-Ball and board games such as Trivial Pursuit, checkers and chess. It also offers eight lanes of bowling, a darts lounge, shuffleboard, Ping-Pong, billiards, marbles and cornhole.

The food and beverage offerings are also an important element at Punch Bowl Social, Penney says.

“We have a scratch kitchen, and we use a lot of local vendors,” he says. “We can cater private events for needs anybody would have. We have a very well-trained private events staff that focuses on service and hospitality.”

One private event option is called The Taco Truck, which allows people to make their own tacos.

WhirlyBall

“Or you can do A Night to Remember, which includes a prime rib carving station,” Penney says.

A 4,000-square-foot rooftop patio is due to open in the spring.

“That will allow us to do even more,” Penney says.

Cleveland’s Punch Bowl Social is the fifth in the country. The first one opened in Denver in 2012, and since then locations have been added in Detroit, Portland, Ore., and Austin, Texas.

Rick Morad, general manager of the WhirlyBall in Bedford Heights, says the venue has hosted hundreds of bar and bar mitzvahs since it opened in 1987.

It’s the only WhirlyBall location in Ohio, he says.

“What makes it so nice is it’s a venue that can handle anywhere from 10 people to 200, and everyone can play,” he says. “The bulk of our business is corporate

46 Bar•Bat Mitzvah // Fall•Winter 2015

businesses during the week, but the kids have a ball.

“We had a bar mitzvah (recently), and we had 80 adults and 80 kids. The adults played just as much as the kids.”

WhirlyBall is a mechanized team sport that is a combination of basketball, hockey and jai alai played while riding an electrically powered bumper car. The object is to take a whiffle ball from one end of the floor to the other and hit a 15-inch target cut out of a backboard that is suspended about 10 feet above the floor.

“What’s unique about WhirlyBall is everyone can play it – men, women and kids,” Morad says.

“Men and women and children can compete with each other. The referee calls and scores the game.

It’s a lot of fun.”

In addition to two WhirlyBall courts, the complex offers a Laser-

Sport arena, six private bowling lanes and billiards. WhirlyBall can be played with up to 10 players by anyone age 9 and over, and Laser-Sport is available for between eight and 20 players age 7 and over.

In Laser-Sport, players are equipped with a high-tech, lightweight vest with electronic sensors on the front, back and shoulders. Points are scored by finding other players and tagging them with a laser light.

WhirlyBall serves beer, wine and soft drinks and offers “great catering,” Morad says.

“We make no food in house,” he says. “We have four restaurants, you can mix and match off the menus, and we deal with a couple kosher caterers.”

The bowling, for ages 5 and up, consists of six standard Brunswick lanes. BB

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“Whether at “Whether at at your yourchild’s child’s “Whether child’s “Whether your child’s “Whether at your child’s Consecration, Bar/Bat Consecration, Bar/Bat Consecration, Bar/Bat Consecration, Bar/Bat “Whether at your child’s Consecration, Bar/Bat Mitzvah, Confirmation, Mitzvah,Confirmation, Confirmation, Mitzvah, oror Mitzvah, Confirmation, or Consecration, Bar/Bat Confirmation, or orMitzvah, wherever we encounter encounter wherever we encounter wherever wherever we encounter Mitzvah, Confirmation, or wherever we encounter them, we’ll show how each them, we’ll show how each them, we’ll show each wherever we how encounter them, we’ll how each we’ll show how each ofthem, lives is the oftheir their lives worth the of their isisworth worth the them, we’ll show how each of lives oftheir their lives isworth worth the life of the whole world. ”the life of the whole world.” life of the whole world.” of their lives is worth the life world.” lifeofofthe the whole world.”

-Rabbi Robert Nosanchuk, Robert Nosanchuk, Rabbi Robert Nosanchuk, --Rabbi Robert Nosanchuk, life of-Rabbi the whole world.”

-Rabbi Robert Nosanchuk, Cantor Sarah Sager Cantor Sarah Sager Cantor Sarah Sager Cantor Sarah Sager -Rabbi Robert Nosanchuk, Cantor Sarah Sager and Rabbi Joshua Caruso and Rabbi Joshua Caruso and Rabbi Joshua Caruso and Rabbi Joshua Caruso and Rabbi Joshua Caruso Cantor Sarah Sager and Rabbi Joshua Caruso

FAIRMOUNT TEMPLE’S TEMPLE’S CLERGY CLERGY FAIRMOUNT FAIRMOUNT TEMPLE’S CLERGY FAIRMOUNT TEMPLE’S CLERGY FAIRMOUNT TEMPLE’S CLERGY partnerwith withstudents students andfamilies, families, meetpartner and meetFAIRMOUNT TEMPLE’S CLERGY partner with students and families, meetpartner with students and families, meetingyou youwhere whereyou youare, are,making making differpartner with students anda adiffering with students and families, meetingpartner you where you are, making a differing you where you are, making a difference your lives and our community. ence inin your lives and our community. families, meeting you wherea you inginyou where you are, making difference your lives and ence in your lives andour ourcommunity. community. encemaking in your lives and our community. are, aTHE difference in your JOIN JOURNEY. JOIN THE JOURNEY. JOIN THE JOURNEY. lives and our community.

JOIN THE JOURNEY. JOIN THE JOURNEY. Wanttotolearn learnmore moreabout aboutlifelong lifelonglearnlearnWant Want to learnmore more about lifelong learnWant to learn about lifelong learning, prayer and social action with ing, prayer and social action with us,us, Want to learn more about lifelong learnWant to learn more about ing, prayer and social action with us, ing, prayer and social action with us, contact Steve Borstein, 216-464-1330 or contact Steve Borstein, 216-464-1330 or ing, prayer and social action with contact Steve Borstein, 216-464-1330 or Sborstein@fairmounttemple.org. contact Steve Borstein, 216-464-1330 lifelong learning, prayer and orus, Sborstein@fairmounttemple.org. contact Steve Borstein, 216-464-1330 or Sborstein@fairmounttemple.org.

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ANSHE CHESED FAIRMOUNT TEMPLE ANSHE CHESED FAIRMOUNT TEMPLE ANSHE CHESED FAIRMOUNT TEMPLE 23737 Fairmount Blvd., Beachwood, OH 44122 216-464-1330 23737 Fairmount Blvd., Beachwood, OH 44122 216-464-1330 CHESED FAIRMOUNT TEMPLE 23737ANSHE Fairmount Blvd., Beachwood, OH 44122 ANSHE CHESED FAIRMOUNT TEMPLE www.fairmounttemple.org (for more info. and live streaming of Shabbat Services) www.fairmounttemple.org (for more info. and live streaming of216-464-1330 Shabbat Services) 23737 Fairmount Blvd., Beachwood, OH 44122 216-464-1330 23737 Fairmount Blvd., Beachwood, 216-464-1330 www.fairmounttemple.org (for more info. andOH live44122 streaming of Shabbat Services) www.fairmounttemple.org (for(for more info. andand livelive streaming of of Shabbat www.fairmounttemple.org more info. streaming ShabbatServices) Services)

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Our children are introduced to Judaism through our awardwinning religious school and youth services long before they join the 76-year tradition of our Bar/Bat Mitzvah Club. Having had fun while learning, they’re ready and fully prepared to stand on the bima for their milestone event!

The Bar/Bat Mitzvah Club features: • Personalized instruction from all of Park Synagogue’s clergy - Rabbi Skoff, Rabbi Marcus, Cantor Pisman and Gadi Galili.

• One-on-one meetings with Rabbi Skoff.

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• Family involvement with parent/child classes.

• Friendly staff to shape the service to your family’s needs and ability.

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(216) 371-2244 | parksynagogue.org Fall•Winter 2015 // Bar•Bat Mitzvah 47

David Tavens / naturallightstudio.org

BOWL THEM OVER

Contemporary bowling alleys offer much more than just 10-pin activities to keep bar and bat mitzvah parties entertained

By Kristen Mott

David Tavens / naturallightstudio.org

S

electing a theme is one of the most important aspects of planning a bar or bat mitzvah reception. With so many ideas to choose from, the options can sometimes seem overwhelming.

Over the past several years, one type of theme in particular has grown in popularity: bowling Not only is bowling considered the most popular participant sport in America, but bowling alleys are also ideal venues for b’nai mitzvah receptions, especially as cold weather starts to arrive in Northeast Ohio.

“You don’t have to be good at bowling to have fun. All ages can do it,” says Mary C. Lessick, director of sales and marketing at The Corner Alley. “We provide a fun, active environment where people are eating, drinking, playing and having a great time.

It gives everyone something to do.”

The Corner Alley downtown

48 Bar•Bat Mitzvah // Fall•Winter 2015

location at East Fourth Street and Euclid Avenue opened in 2006 and underwent major renovations this past summer.

The space offers 16 bowling lanes, a casual dining restaurant, a walk-up bar, open patio and a selection of games, including shuffleboard and foosball.

The Corner Alley Uptown location, which opened in December 2014 in University Circle, features 17 lanes, two bars, multiple lounges and dining areas, and a game area with air hockey and arcade games.

Both venues are more than 20,000 square feet and can be manipulated to accommodate different-sized parties.

“There are private spaces that can be reserved at each location, depending on the size of the group,” Lessick explains.

“The parties can be as small as eight people and go all the way up to 500 guests.”

Sue Gable and her husband, Glenn, started Freeway Lanes in the ’90s. Freeway Lanes of Solon was the first location to open, followed by Freeway Lanes of Parma.

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Tim Janson / Freeway Lanes of Solon

Tim Janson / Freeway Lanes of Solon

Tim Janson / Freeway Lanes of Solon

David Tavens / naturallightstudio.org

About five years ago, the business merged with a partner to create Game Entertainment.

Game of Mentor and Game of Wickliffe opened soon after.

Out of the four family-owned and –operated locations, Solon and Mentor are the most popular for b’nai mitzvah receptions, Gable says. Freeway Lanes of Solon offers a newly remodeled, private eight-lane suite and a challenging laser maze for guests. Game of Mentor, which went through a major renovation throughout 2014, features a private 10-lane suite, a new bar with 16 flat-screen TVs, and a new patio with a seating area and fire pit.

Each location also has 15foot drop-down screens in the private suites that can be used to display photos or a reflection video during a reception.

“In today’s market there is

a lot of competition and lot of choices for venues,” Gable says.

“We pride ourselves on continually updating and remodeling our spaces.”

Bowling alleys also have started to place a greater emphasis on cuisine. Both of The Corner Alley locations offer an Americana-inspired menu, from wings and pizza to gourmet sandwiches. At Game Entertainment and Freeway Lanes, two chefs are on staff.

“Our motto is from sliders to surf and turf, we can pretty much do it all,” Gable says. “It’s all about the guest of honor and what kind of food he or she likes.”

Although bowling alleys have always been popular, Lessick says many have evolved to keep up with the changing times. Some have turned into family entertainment centers

50 Bar•Bat Mitzvah // Fall•Winter 2015

David Tavens / naturallightstudio.org

by adding laser tag, bounce houses and redemption arcade games, which is the route Game Entertainment and Freeway Lanes have taken. Others, like The Corner Alley, have turned into boutique bowling alleys with an emphasis on food and beverage.

“Bowling alleys have always been around, but I think they’re trying to figure out what the right fit is for the next generation,” Lessick says. “We’re not your typical bowling alley. Our venues are stunning, and I think

families feel like they can come here and still have their event hosted at a beautiful venue.”

Gable believes bowling alleys will continue to serve as popular destinations for b’nai mitzvah receptions.

“Bar and bat mitzvahs are multigenerational events,” she says. “You have kids, younger siblings, parents and grandparents. The nice thing about bowling alleys and family entertainment centers is there are things for everybody to do. There’s never a dull moment.” BB

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BANKING ON IT

Money is a slam-dunk gift, and developing a game plan for managing it is a winning strategy

By Kristen Mott

A

bar or bat mitzvah is a momentous event for a young teenager. To celebrate the occasion, friends and relatives sometimes give money.

While teenagers may be tempted to spend their entire gift on the latest smartphone or gadget, parents can use this opportunity to teach their son or daughter important money management and banking skills that will be useful throughout their life.

Amy Pierce, vice president of corporate treasury management at CF Bank, says it’s important for parents to talk with their children about the importance of saving money.

“The actual experience of having a bank account will be a learning process for the child,” Pierce says. “They can watch the funds grow and will be happy that they didn’t run out and spend it all. It’s more rewarding to watch the money grow over time.”

A classic savings account is the most common option for young adults, according to Vince Szymborski, managing director of retail product management at Talmer Bank and Trust.

“With a savings account, you learn the discipline of putting money away for a future date and it teaches, particularly for young people, that you don’t spend everything in your pocket,” Szymborski says. “If that lesson gets enforced early, it can lead to a lifetime of good spending habits.”

Another option is opening up a money

52 Bar•Bat Mitzvah // Fall•Winter 2015

Pierce

Szymborski

market account, Pierce says. This type of account allows teenagers to earn interest on their money like a classic savings account but also gives them limited access to checks.

“It’s a good opportunity for them to not only save money and invest but also learn the basics of how a checking account works,” Pierce says.

For parents who are hesitant to let their children have access to checks, Pierce suggests a traditional savings account or a CD, which offers competitive rates and prevents the teen from withdrawing money for a determined length of time.

Szymborski cautions that more risks may be involved with opening a checking account, especially for young teens new to banking, citing overdraft fees and the ability to transfer money.

“A checking account is a more complex vehicle than a savings account,” he explains.

“When you introduce checks and debit cards into the mix, the temptation to spend is there. A checking account is essentially a money transferal vehicle.”

Still, a checking account can teach children important skills, including how to

balance a checkbook. Many banks, including Talmer Bank, offer banking tools and apps that help users monitor their accounts and send alerts for overdraft protection. Parents also can add themselves as secondary names on the checking account, Szymborski says, giving them access to the account.

Pierce says utilizing online banking is a key component in teaching children and teenagers important financial skills.

“When you encourage children and teens to use online banking, they can log in and check their own accounts and really learn to manage their money,” she says.

“They can learn how to budget for things that they want or save for things they want and need, like a car when they turn 16 or money for college. It helps them learn money management skills.”

While some teens may be tempted to just keep their bar or bat mitzvah money in a shoebox under the bed, Szymborski says opening a bank account introduces them to financial responsibility.

“The whole idea of a savings account is that you’re saving for something,” he says.

“It helps you down a goal-oriented path. If the money is just in your room in the sock drawer, the temptation to derail your goals is always right there.

“A lot of banking is the mindset of planning and preparing for the future. You’re not going to get rich with a savings account, but you’ll get disciplined. Having a budgeting and planning mentality for the future oftentimes helps young people well into middle age if they have a good start.” BB

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PROPER PRESENTS B ar and bat mitzvahs seem to get bigger and bigger – and more and more expensive – with each passing year. Thankfully, your gift doesn’t have to.

Local experts note that there are a variety of affordable and unique gifts with which to present a bar or bat mitzvah that are far more thoughtful than a stack of twenties.

One of the easiest might be an Israel bond.

State treasurer Josh Mandel led Ohio’s purchase of $42 million in Israel bonds in 2013 and $47.8 million in 2014 – bringing the state’s total to more than $105 million.

Thankfully, you don’t need to spend that kind of cash on your bar or bat mitzvah.

Israel bonds start at $36, with numerous pricing options, and are easily attainable online.

“You can pick the bond and the dollar denomination, and you can pick the occasion and create a PDF to print or email a customized gift card from

the convenience of your home 24/7,” says Thomas Lockshin, executive director for Israel Bonds in Ohio and Kentucky.

“Within a few minutes, you can buy a bond and create a customized gift card.”

Israel bonds weren’t always so cheap. Once upon a time, the minimum denomination was $100. The $36 option has helped make them a very popular gift for bar and bat mitzvahs.

“It’s expanded the base of purchasers, so there’s more people to buy them and there’s more recipients, so it’s good on both ends, (for) the giver and the receiver,” Lockshin says.

While support for Israel is perhaps the most important part of an Israel bond, and the reason it ties so well into a bar or bat mitzvah, it’s also a great

54 Bar•Bat Mitzvah // Fall•Winter 2015

financial tool, given that they tend to mature after five years.

In other words, an Israel bond will mature around that bar or bat mitzvah’s 18th birthday, giving them some spending money as they head off to college or the work world.

And unlike a 529 college savings plan, the 18-year-old can use the money however he or she likes. It can go toward a late-night pizza with roommates or direct college expenses like books and tuition.

For those who want a gift to unwrap right then – and don’t like the idea of a five-year wait – Wood Trader in Cleveland Heights has the ability to frame the perfect memento.

For some, that might mean putting a photo of the bar or bat mitzvah out on a table at the reception, having friends and family sign it, and then framing it as a nice keepsake.

For an athlete, one might frame a picture or collage from his or her on-field career. For a

Inexpensive and meaningful options aplenty for your bar or bat mitzvah gift

By Jonah L. Rosenblum performer, he or she can now live on-stage forever.

Or one might just want a nice way to show off bar or bat mitzvah pictures – rather than simply tucking them into an album.

“They’re paying a lot of money for these photos that sometimes end up in albums and are never seen again,” says Leslie Kammer, general manager at Wood Trader. “It is kind of fun to walk by (them) and remember.”

Others will frame an invitation. And the best part: Frames can be attained quite inexpensively. Custom-built frames obviously cost more, but Kammer says that a ready-made frame can be purchased for less than $50.

“We have frames all over the gamut,” Kammer says. “The kids may want pictures of them with their friends for the bedroom.

(A parent) may want (a picture of ) the family to put in the basement.” BB

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