ENC 4215 Peer Review Form for Client-Based Project To be completed by the Designer: Name of Designer: Claudia Gonzalez A brief statement of the Purpose, Audience, Subject, and Situation for the document: I designed a flyer and am in the process of designing a booklet for the South Miami Band (my high school music program). This is a magnet school, meaning that students audition to be accepted into the program and more is expected from them than non-magnet music programs. Both marching season and concert season in mandatory in order to participate in the program year round and to remain in the school. Students and parents are to be informed well ahead of time of their expectations so that they may plan accordingly in the months to come. These documents are geared to both the incoming students and their parents. The flyers to bring them in (the top portion for the students already in the program; the bottom portion for the incoming students and parents). The booklets are so that they can keep all the information that they will be given for their reference. There a lot of competitions dates and fee deadlines to remember. The subject of the documents is the event that will be held, and the information that will be shared in the duration of the event. Each year the program hosts a sort of luncheon or dinner for the incoming families so that they can feel welcomed into the program and so that they are aware of what is to come in the next school year. In many of these events, information is shared, handouts are given, and then it is forgotten within a week’s time. The purpose of these documents is so that the families can turn to them in the duration of the summer, keep up with the due dates, and hopefully the majority of their questions and concerns will be addressed.
To be completed by the Reviewer: Name of Reviewer: Michael Diaz When completing this form, be sure to address the questions posed in Module 8. 1. List three or more strengths of the document. • •
• •
The darker background and the white font mesh well, making the information stand out and the flyer look sophisticated. The document isn’t overloaded with information, but the information that is there has clearly been placed meticulously. I know from personal experience that not having the day of the week written next to the actual date on a flyer can lead to a lot of no-shows, so it’s good that you have it there. The flyer caters to both incoming students and existing ones. I really enjoy the balance between text and the large graphic in your flyer. It looks like it would be satisfying to hold, as strange as that sounds. The large graphic also allows you to hold the flyer in your hand without obscuring any of the text.
2. List at least two areas/aspects of the document that could be improved. • •
Different fonts could be used to further emphasize the hierarchy of information. Currently, all the information feels like one singular block of text. Although you do specify that the event is mandatory, I think the flyer would benefit from specifying compelling reasons for attending the luncheon.
3. Offer specific suggestions for improvement. I really like the visual style you are going for with your flyer. It lends itself well to the subject, but I think a few changes could help it better serve your audience. Although I would hope that “THE EVENT IS MANDATORY” would be enough to make parents and students attend the luncheon, I think elaborating on why the event is so important (in the bottom paragraph) would make your document more compelling. The information has to be kept brief, of course, and I’m sure you plan on going into much more detail in your brochure, but new students and families might not understand why the luncheon is so important without knowing that important deadlines and program information will be discussed there. The current diction “come in and learn more..” conjures a very relaxed tone, making the flyer seem inviting, but not particularly urgent.
Although your document feels well-balanced thanks to the large graphic, it also feels like there is some wasted space due to just how large the graphic is. I think placing the “THIS EVENT IS MANDATORY..” line centered on the bottom of the flyer would make it stand out more to readers, as well as fill some of the empty space. It also seems like “South Miami Cobra Band” and “Parent/Student Luncheon” are competing to be the focal point of the text. Some font differentiation, such as giving the band name a fancier script font or making it centered along the top of the flyer, would help make your document clearer.