CM: Rumson • Fair Haven • Little Silver • Red Bank • Locust • Sea Bright - February 2021 by Community Magazine NJ

R U M S O N • FA I R H AV E N • L I T T L E S I LV E R RED BANK • SEA BRIGHT • LOCUST • MIDDLETOWN

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EDITOR-IN-CHIEF C A R O LY N B U R T N I C K CREATIVE DIRECTOR L O R I D O N N E L LY ART DIRECTOR E R I C A PA R K E R SENIOR DESIGNER OLIVIA M A Z ANEC MARKETING & FEATURE DIRECTORS L I L I A N N PA R A S C AT H Y PA D I L L A GRAPHIC DESIGN ASSISTANT A LY S S A S I R I C O CONTRIBUTING WRITERS SUSAN MURPHY SHANNA POLIGNONE HOPE DANIEL S DONNA BERIONT PHOTOGRAPHY C A R M E L A C A R A C A P PA TOM Z AP CIC SOCIAL MEDIA + DIGITAL CONSULTANT M AT T A N D E R S O N OFFICE MANAGEMENT M ARIA CONNORS S H I R L E Y S T. CL A I R PUBLISHER V I C T O R V. S C U D I E R Y BE A PART OF CM We accept pet photos, local event listings, fundraiser & important life announcements (engagement, wedding, baby) and more! Do you know people who are extraordinary and live in our community? Tell us about them; we would love to spotlight them in future editions of CM! You can do this by emailing: info@communitymagazinenj.com For our media kit & rates, email: advertising@communitymagazinenj.com Community Magazine takes no responsibility for the content of any advertisement nor does it guarantee the accuracy, veracity or truthfulness of any statement made in any advertisement. Any and all liability for any claims resulting from the content of any advertisement published by Community Magazine is solely the responsibility of the advertiser. Community Magazine is owned and operated by Direct Development, LLC.

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Giving Tuesday Lunch for Sea Bright Company 43 Last month, the Sea Bright Fire and Rescue, Company 43, in Sea Bright was treated to lunch by nine-year-old Crawford Pennington and his family in honor of Giving Tuesday. Crawford admires the firefighters and policemen and thinks of them as superheroes, so he was thrilled with his private tour and VIP ride in the fire engine after he had served lunch. He was able to chat to the Police Chief, Fire Chief, and a very special German Shepherd named Rika who spends a lot of her time at the station. “It’s very important to show our thanks to those who are always helping others,” Crawford shared with his parents. “As a family, giving back has been incredibly important to us and Crawford has always been a kind person and aware of his community,” shared his mother, Ann Pennington, former Mrs. New Jersey. “From sleeping out to support Covenant House to donating to food banks, he loves to give back. On Giving Tuesday we thought instead of giving money to a cause, which is still important to do, we wanted to do something that could bring joy to a wonderful group of people. Crawford wrote down tasks and we put them into his Giving Tuesday jar then he selected one. Feeding frontline workers is what he picked.”

Members of Sea Bright Fire and Rescue, Sea Bright Councilman Jeffrey Booker, Ann Pennington and her son, Crawford (with hat on) gather for photo. Credit: Tom Zapcic Photography

Ranney Student Raises Funds for Asbury Park Music Foundation By Susan Murphy In celebration of his recent eleventh birthday, Sean Ricard decided to hold a birthday fundraiser on Facebook. With the help of family and friends, he was able to raise more than $1,300 in January and to donate the funds to the Asbury Park Music Foundation (APMF). Sean, who attends Ranney School, shared what inspired him to write his first piano piece and hold the fundraiser. “I wrote a song in school about generosity on my guitar for a school assembly and then had an idea I could write a song to raise money,” said Sean. “I did perform it in a video and I posted the video on my mom’s Facebook account and on my Instagram account @SeanRicard.” Besides classical piano, Sean also plays the electric guitar and keyboard. He works with his piano teacher, Mrs. Lovell, on a weekly basis and performs both classical and contemporary songs. “I have been taking music lessons since I was six years old,” said Sean. “I started with only piano, but then picked up the guitar. I recently completed Bohemian Rhapsody, and now I am learning Für Elise by Beethoven.” Sean takes guitar lessons at Lakehouse Music Academy in Asbury Park from his teacher, Dan Haase. The academy is a progressive music school that features group rehearsals, individual lessons, and live performances at Asbury Park’s world famous music venues. There are different programs at every level for every age. “Sometimes I play keyboard on some songs with my Lakehouse band, whose name is Deadly Maintenance Crew,” noted Sean. Aside from his music lessons, Sean enjoys reading mystery books and math in school. He also finds music as a way to help face challenges. “I am interested in astronomy and have a telescope I use.

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I also collect foreign coins and enjoy building things,” shared Sean. “The biggest challenge of 2020 was how everything was changing and not knowing what was and what wasn’t safe. Music makes me feel good. Mrs. Lovell figured out how to teach me remotely first, and then Lakehouse did the same, and then I had a little bit of a routine in quarantine. Something I would want other kids to know about taking music lessons is that it’s really fun and music can make you feel better. I chose to donate to APMF because they give music lessons to kids who can’t afford them.” The mission of the Asbury Park Music Foundation is to keep the Asbury Park music legacy alive by providing under-served youth with life-changing music education, helping the local music scene thrive and uniting a diverse community through music.

KEEP GETTING EMERGENCY CARE

STAYING HEALTHY IS PART OF STAYING SAFE. Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve all spent the past few months taking extra precautions in order to stay safe. But right now, staying healthy is just as important. If you or a loved one is experiencing severe symptoms such as chest pain, difficulty breathing, vision or balance problems or severe abdominal pain, go to the closest emergency room or call 911.

From the Field to the Ice

Charlie shows off his new patriotic attire after being named to the USA Bobsled National Team in December of 2020.

Volker Named to National Bobsled/Skeleton Team Former Rumson Fair Haven Regional High School (RFH) football and track star, Charlie Volker, has laced up different spikes five years after leaving the halls of RFH to take his speed and skill to the ice. The All State and All Shore running back and sprinter took on a completely new challenge when his post-college plans to try out for the NFL were paused due to the pandemic. As Bulldog fans have come to expect from the standout student and athlete who went on to continue his academic and athletic career at Princeton University, Volker has found immediate success in the sport of bobsledding. Before this fall, Volker had never been in a sled. He was hard at work training at football minicamps preparing for his shot at the NFL when the pandemic forced the camps to close. But a new opportunity was presented as one of Volker’s training coaches had been a bobsledder and commented to him that he was the right type of athlete for the sport. Since he loves a good challenge and had just spent three months training for speed and strength, Volker completed the online combine (a 40-yard-dash and a broad jump) for the USA Bobsled/Skeleton Team and garnered attention. He was invited to the Olympic & Paralympic Training Center in Lake Placid, New York to try out at team trials. There, Volker got a crash course on the sport and this past December, successfully earned a spot on the US National Team. Volker rides in the “brakeman” position, the very back of both two-and four-man sleds, and the position responsible for pulling the brakes at the end of the track to slow the sled on the finish ramp. He seems to relish his new role. “It’s a very fun position because, like being on the back of a rollercoaster, you really feel every one of the 5Gs that we’re pulling on the Lake Placid track,” shared Volker. “It’s also very

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challenging because it beats you up a bit after a few runs, and the brakeman has to try his best to stay as low and locked in as possible.” Not the first football player or track star to transition to bobsled, Volker is in good company among Heisman Trophy winner Herschel Walker and Olympic gold medal hurdler Willie Davenport. “The actual sledding/sliding itself is a rush just like football is, and I’d call myself an adventure seeker,” said Volker. “But more than that what I like most about it is being on a team with some great people. A lot of these guys and girls (on the women’s team) are incredibly high achievers and just great people. I was surprised at how nice and welcoming everyone was to me upon introduction.” Volker capped off his amazing athletic career at Rumson Fair Haven with 3955 career rushing yards (3508 total yards and 42 touchdowns during his junior and senior years), two CJ Group 2 State Football Championships, and a victory in the 100 meter dash at the NJSIAA Track and Field Meet of Champions. He was equally as talented in the classroom as well and a spirited and integrity-filled role model for younger students. “Charlie was one of the hardest working student-athletes we have ever seen here at RFH, on and off the field,” recalled Vice Principal of Athletics and Student Activities, Chris Lanzalotto. “I am extremely proud of all he has accomplished and cannot wait to see him represent our country on the USA Bobsled Team.” Volker went on to attend Princeton University where he continued to excel academically and athletically as a two-sport athlete, graduating in 2019 with a degree in history. Volker’s entire family attended RFH and Fair Haven, including his

parents, his two sisters, Emily and Megan, and his brother John, a current senior who has made his mark at RFH in his own right and who will follow in his brother’s footsteps by attending Princeton University next fall. Though a change in course has prevented Volker from traveling to train and compete in Europe as originally planned, he is excited to spend the next two months competing in the North American Cup and to compete in the National Team Trials in March to prepare for the elongated Olympic year. Volker expects a short summer break before training next fall to compete in the World Cup next winter leading right up to the Olympic Games in Beijing in February of 2022. Volker is quick to credit his newfound bobsledding success to the important lessons learned as both a Bulldog and a Tiger. “At RFH and Princeton I learned to carry myself proudly but humbly,” said Volker. “Doing this on the competitive field or track was just as, if not more important than, off the field. These institutions have always valued hard working and respectable people and I was lucky enough in both settings to be surrounded by many of these people from whom I modeled my own behavior.” He also gushes about his family, “They’ve all been very supportive of this journey and when I called home telling them I made the National Team, they started yelling the lyrics to “Proud to be an American!” Regardless of what the future holds, Volker is incredibly thankful for the experience he has gained, the people he has met, and the memories that he has made in only a short time. “The most challenging part of the past year has been finding an opportunity like this,” shared Volker. “I’m someone who needs a goal to work toward and I was at a point this year where I was jobless and pursuit-less and that was very tough for me. Thankfully, I have a strong support system in the form of family, a girlfriend, friends, coaches, and teachers who I was able to reach out to for guidance. I’m looking forward to everything this opportunity has to offer. I can’t wait to experience and learn from all of it!”

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Charlie Volker trains (pictured in his white helmet and in the center during the push start, further above) at the Olympic & Paralympic Training Center in Lake Placid, NY.

Little Silver Resident is Creating Cakes for a Cause By Susan Murphy

Meg Ricard is utilizing her baking skills to help local families in a unique way. The Little Silver resident, who is a board member of the BloomAgain Foundation NJ, has created Cakes for a Cause. “This is a brand new endeavor. I made cakes for friends throughout 2020 and they asked how to pay me. I said just make a donation to BloomAgain and it kind of just came to fruition!” explained Ricard. BloomAgain is a Monmouth County-based, 501(c)(3) that provides working women living at or near the poverty level with living essentials when they miss work due to medical challenges. The Board of Directors is a 100% volunteer group of women from a wide variety of backgrounds who generously give their time, talent, and treasure to help these women. Meg Ricard is a Board member who has a degree in Sociology with a minor in Computer Science from NYU, where she graduated with honors. She has worked as a graphic designer, a desktop publisher, and a book production manager. Following the birth of her children, she owned a professional organizing business in Chicago. Ricard currently lives in Little Silver with her husband, Matt, and two children, Ella and Sean. She is a stay-at-home mom who volunteers her time to schools and the community. Ricard explained what inspired her to start Cakes for a Cause. “We had to cancel all events that help us raise money for BloomAgain because of Covid19 and we (the board) were trying to brainstorm creative ways to raise money. Around the same time, a friend asked me to make a cake for their daughter, so the idea kind of hit me.” During 2020, Ricard said she worked on fondant cake decorating techniques for friends’ birthdays. She was encouraged to start a cake decorating business but had no desire to do so. That’s when she decided upon this endeavor. Working from her Little Silver home, Ricard will create a beautifully sculpted personalized creation for your next celebration. In return, she asks that you make a donation to BloomAgain. A minimum donation of $75 and a two-week lead time to create the cake is required. “The amount of the donation will be worked out at the time of the cake request depending on the size and design of the cake. There is a limit to how many cakes I can make per week, so the earlier you order, the better,” said Ricard. “I prefer to deliver the cake to make sure the cake looks perfect. Sometimes you have to assemble the cake at the event.” “The cakes I made in 2020 for friends’ birthdays were all a success and seemed to bring a lot of smiles. I turned a hobby into a way to raise money for a great cause that I’m proud to be a part of; it’s a win/win,” said Ricard. Interested in a cake? Contact Meg Ricard by emailing cakesforbloomagain@gmail.com, to check out Meg’s Cakes – view them on Instagram @cakesforbloomagain.

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Little Silver resident Meg Ricard holds a birthday cake she created, the cost of which will benefit the charity BloomAgain.

This is a close up of the barnyard-themed birthday cake requested for a nine-year-old.

Byrnes , O'H ern & H eugle A F U L L S E RV I C E L AW F I R M S E RV I N G I N D I V I D UA L S & B U S I N E S S E S

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By LiliAnn Paras

Becoming a mother is a profound experience, and Ingrid Read soon realized it also gives rise to many unforeseen feelings and questions, not only about motherhood, but also about balancing personal and professional ambitions. Three years ago, Ingrid found herself scouring the internet for some direction and knew she could not possibly be alone in feeling a bit lost. She recognized the sense it would make for information to be available all in one place, and so, while on maternity leave, Ingrid created Working Momkind, an online community now helping more than 176,000 moms worldwide find support and information. Last year, she added an additional layer of support--she is now a certified Postpartum Doula. Meet Ingrid Read, whose decision to solve a common problem has led to a source of comfort for so many.

CM: Tell us about your family. Ingrid: I live in Red Bank with my husband, Todd, our 3-yearold son Carter, and our Toy Poodle named Frankie. We moved from Brooklyn to Red Bank last winter, and we are currently living in the house Todd’s mother grew up in. He spent his whole life visiting Red Bank, where his grandparents were small business owners, with family in the community dating back multiple generations. Despite the pandemic restrictions, we’ve quickly fallen in love with the area. Having the beach so close was a huge plus this past summer! CM: What is the mission of Working Momkind? Ingrid: Working Momkind was born right after my son in 2017. When you become a mother, your priorities change, and sometimes your goals and ambitions can end up taking a backseat. Working Momkind is the go-to destination for mothers of all walks of life. Besides our blog, we offer a growing directory of resources such as: Crowdfunding for entrepreneurs, Career Advice, Infant and Childhood Wellness, Diversity and Inclusion, Workplace Rights, and more. Last summer, we launched a private community that connects mothers virtually and in-person. Every month we host virtual events. A few of our standing events include a postpartum support group, a book club, mommy hour, guest expert events, networking opportunities, and more. CM: You mention a postpartum support group. What led you to become a Postpartum Doula, and what does that entail? Ingrid: I wanted to provide a higher level of support for the community I have built. About 1 in 10 new mothers suffer from postpartum depression, and a lot of this has to do with the lack of emotional and physical support after birth. Most mothers do not see their healthcare providers until their sixweek checkup, and as a certified Postpartum Doula, I can provide an additional layer of support for new mothers by helping them learn how to care for their new baby while also adjusting to their new life as a parent.

Photo Credit: Vianney, VNA Creates

CM: Are there plans to expand Working Momkind in 2021? Ingrid: Absolutely! My goal is to continue to help members fulfill their dreams and crush their personal and professional goals. I plan to launch a program to help mothers with entrepreneurial aspirations establish their brand and grow their businesses at their own pace and from the comfort of their own home. Helping mothers achieve a level of flexibility is a passion I have developed since I became a mother who is “trying to do it all.” We also will be focusing on partnering with businesses and organizations to foster and maintain a family-oriented culture and environment for their employees, both in the office and remotely. Pandemic-related job losses have affected women the most, mainly due to the lack of childcare, school schedule changes, and flexibility in the workplace. CM: Do you have a favorite quote or philosophy? Ingrid: There is a quote that has always resonated with me. “If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.” Imagine how far you can go when you can easily tap into a like-minded community of women who are traveling down the same road as you or have already gotten to the destination; the opportunities are endless. CM: Is there anything you’d like readers to know? Ingrid: It does not matter how many children you have, what you do for a living, or what stage of motherhood you are in. If you are a new mom or veteran mom struggling and feeling like you are lost, know you are not alone. There is a community of supportive and encouraging mothers waiting to welcome you with open arms. Visit workingmomkind.com for more information.

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TopCookie Dessert Competition Brings Girl Scouts & Jersey Shore Chefs Together Local Chefs to Compete in TopCookie Dessert Competition

Girl Scouts CEO Eileen Higgins (second from left) launches the TopCookie competition with contenders: Angela Goblesky, Charlie’s of Bay Head; Marilyn Schlossbach and Nora Watson, White Chapel Projects; Corey DeBiasse, Marina Grille; and lead judge David Burke. Also competing is Cardinal Provisions, Asbury Park. (Photo Credit: Stormin’ Arts Productions)

It’s Girl Scout cookie season, that wonderful time of the year when we get to stock up on Thin Mints, Samoas, and all our favorites. To help make this year extra sweet, the Girl Scouts of the Jersey Shore will host its second annual TopCookie dessert competition on March 16 to cook up support for its Troops and four Jersey Shore restaurants. Plans for the TopCookie contest were shared by Girl Scouts CEO Eileen Higgins and world-renowned Chef David Burke at the media event, which took place at Tim McLoone’s Supper Club on the Asbury Park boardwalk. “It’s been a tough year for everyone,” said Higgins, who oversees the Girl Scout council, which encompasses nearly 10,000 girls in Monmouth and Ocean counties and about 4,000 adult volunteers. “We are thrilled to be able to showcase and support local restaurants and the Girl Scout Cookie Program in a unique and fun way.” Participating restaurants and the Girl Scout Cookies they will be using in their desserts are: Cardinal, Asbury Park – Samoas; Charlie’s of Bay Head, Bay Head – Lemon-Ups; Marina Grille, Belmar – Trefoils; and

White Chapel Projects, Long Branch – Tagalongs. Higgins explained that chefs from these Jersey Shore eateries will present their dessert creations to a panel of celebrity judges, led by Burke, who will select the winning dessert for the title of TopCookie. The local community can also get involved by purchasing votes for their favorite restaurant at $1 a vote with a minimum donation of $10. The top vote getter will claim the People’s Choice Award, won last year by McLoone’s Restaurants. Along with Burke, the judges are: Amelia Caverly, baker and co-owner of Booskerdoo; James Costello, owner of Ohana Grill in Lavallette and the 2020 TopCookie champion; Jacki Sharpe, owner of Purple Glaze Donuts, Asbury Park; and Kacie Duesterdick and Matthew Simonik, SeastheDish, food and restaurant influencers. Due to COVID-19 restrictions, the competition will be taped and available for all ticket holders to view in the comfort of their home on March 21. For more information and tickets, visit www.GSFun.org.

Two River Theater Announces Virtual Little Shakespeare Education Program High School Students Encouraged to Submit Video Auditions Two River Theater’s most popular education program, A Little Shakespeare, breaks the mold to create something entirely new with Tiny Shakes: Romeo and Juliet, adapted and directed by Em Weinstein (A Little Shakespeare: Twelfth Night). Every season, Two River Theater introduces hundreds of young people—and adults—to the work of the Bard through its annual A Little Shakespeare program, now in its eighth season. More than 140 students from 28 different schools have participated in seven A Little Shakespeare productions: As You Like It, A Midsummer Night’s Dream, Pericles, The Merry Wives of Windsor, The Comedy of Errors, Macbeth and Twelfth Night. The program has welcomed over 7,000 audience members, including more than 2,800 students from 35 schools across the state of New Jersey. This year, the program takes the limitations of 2021 as an opportunity for students to delve deeply into Shakespeare’s star-crossed romantic tragedy, giving them the agency to tell the story of each scene in their own way and film it: traditional Zoom scene reading? Rap battle? Movement or dance piece? Animation? The sky’s the limit!

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Video submissions, due by March 1, will be edited into a theatrical collage that can be accessed through Two River’s website this May. There, audiences and educators can take the journey of the play through the videos, and continue to use this site as a resource. More information and audition details can be found at tworivertheater.org/tiny-shakes.

CommunityMagazineNJ.com FEBRUARY 2021

Local Couple Donates More Than 100,000 Masks to Frontline Workers and Families in Need

Barton and Kristina Henderson Give Masks to Food Banks and Nonprofits in Five States to Help Keep Employees, Volunteers, and the Community COVID Safe To help do their part during the pandemic, Monmouth County natives 800 masks; New Jersey Department of Health (for psychiatric facilities) and Red Bank business owners, Barton and Kristina Henderson, – 3,800 masks; Monmouth County (NJ) Sheriff’s Department - 500 donated and helped distribute 20,000 masks to 2,200 families in need masks; Monmouth County (NJ) SPCA – 100 masks; Fulfill FoodBank at at a drive-thru food distribution today at Bader Field in Atlantic City in the Jersey Shore – Neptune, NJ – 700 masks; HABcore – Red Bank, NJ partnership with Community FoodBank of New Jersey and the Casino – 500 masks; Lunch Break – Red Bank, NJ – 500 masks; Tigger House Reinvestment Development Authority (CRDA). This donation is part Foundation - Red Bank, NJ – 500 masks; and many more. of the Henderson’s broader donation of 108,000+ masks from their The Hendersons utilized the supply chains they had in place factory in Santa Ana, California, to food banks and various nonprofits overseas when the pandemic struck to begin much-needed PPE in New Jersey, New York, California, Pennsylvania, and Florida. The production. They quickly opened their own factory in the United States “Masking Up from Coast to Coast” campaign is aimed at assisting in the to avoid shipping delays to provide frontline workers with 3ply, made in fight against COVID-19. the U.S.A., surgical masks from their factory in Santa Ana, California. It “Masks are expensive and for many Americans they simply are not is now one of only a few USA made PPE manufacturers in the country. in the budget. People who are struggling right now, out of work and More information on the company can be found at hendersonppe.com. “As the health and safety of our communities are paramount during finding it difficult to put food on the table for their children, will keep wearing dirty, disposable masks because they can’t afford to buy new this difficult time, CFBNJ is grateful to Bart and Kristina Henderson ones. Our donation to families and frontline workers is one way we for their donation of masks for 2,200 families and for volunteering at can help make a difference. We want to thank Feeding America and today’s distribution,” said Carlos Rodriguez, President & CEO of the Feeding New York State Association for helping us locate areas with Community FoodBank of New Jersey. “Together, we’re nourishing great need,” said Barton Henderson, Esq., Chief Business Development our neighbors in need and enabling them to help stop the spread of Officer and Co-Owner of Henderson Promos, based in Red Bank. COVID-19.” “My husband and I just want to help. Our business pivoted to “RWJBarnabas Health is grateful for the generous donation of PPE production at the onset of the pandemic, and we see the demand masks from Mr. and Mrs. Henderson. Donations like this help us defend for masks first-hand. It is our pleasure to provide frontline workers our communities and those who protect us through their work on the at food banks and other nonprofits, as well as families in need, with front lines from the spread of COVID-19. This is key not only to slowing essential masks to help keep them safe during these unprecedented the spread of this virus, but also to ensuring we can continue to move in times. Nobody should be at greater risk of contracting or spreading the the right direction to return to healthier lives together,” said Glenn Miller, virus because they can’t afford clean masks,” said Kristina Henderson, Executive Vice President, Chief Development Officer, RWJBarnabas Chief Executive Officer and Co-Owner of Henderson Promos, and the Health Foundation. current Mrs. New Jersey American titleholder. Special thanks to the many volunteers who assisted in separating Local recipients of masks from the Hendersons include: RWJ the masks into packets of nine to distribute to families in need, and Barnabas Health Foundation – New Brunswick, NJ – 6,000 masks; Police to the YMCA of Greater Monmouth County for allowing Barton and Departments in New Jersey – Middletown, Eatontown, and Berkeley – Kristina Henderson to use its facility in Freehold to prepare the packets.

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whatever your aspirations are, we can help you achieve them in retirement.

Contact us today for a Complimentary Review of Your Investments. A DV I S O R S F O R YO U R R E T I R E M E N T 732.945 .7472 | jdee@gfplan.com | gfplan.com Investment advisory services offered through First Capital Advisors Group, LLC a SEC Registered Investment Advisor DBA Greenleaf Financial. Registration as an investment adviser does not imply a certain level of skill or training.

CommunityMagazineNJ.com FEBRUARY 2021

DI VORCE TA LK

BY PET ER C . PA R A S , ESQ.

CUSTODY The word custody evokes a variety of reactions in a divorce case. Alarm and confusion are two of the more common ones. Unfortunately, some parents threaten to fight for custody simply to upset the other parent or to gain leverage in the negotiation of a divorce settlement.

and parenting time schedules. Despite the acrimony between spouses, most people are eventually able to sublimate their feelings about their spouse in order to arrive at a consensus on which living arrangement is best for the children.

Custody of children is undoubtedly one of the most important issues a family court judge must address in a divorce case. The guiding legal principle is “the best interests of the child.” In determining what is in the best interests of the child, virtually anything that bears upon the child’s health, education and general welfare will be considered. The facts vary from case to case and it is the unique circumstances of each child and each family unit that ultimately shape the court’s decision.

Often agreements provide for joint legal custody, but designate one parent the Parent of Principal Residence (PPR). The other parent is the Parent of Alternate Residence (PAR). Joint legal custody requires a basic level of civil communication between the parents about issues affecting the children and an ability to put aside personal feelings about the former spouse when communicating about or in the presence of the children. Absent this most basic principle, joint custody probably won’t work and probably wouldn’t be ordered by the court.

Thankfully, most parents reach an agreement about their children’s custody

Parents don’t have to like each other to have joint custody. They do, however,

Peter C. Paras

is a shareholder in the Family Law Firm of Paras, Apy & Reiss, P.C.

Selected as "Super Lawyer" by NJ Monthly 2006 - 2020. Included in Best Lawyers in America 2015 - 2021. 2020 Justice Daniel J. O'Hern Award Recipient

have to recognize that it is contrary to their children’s interests to expose them to their negative feelings about each other. Quite often children, as they grow and mature, realize that the parent about whom bad things were said is not that bad and the parent who said them is not that good. In New Jersey parents have an affirmative legal obligation to encourage their children’s relationship with the other parent. This is often difficult to do, but it is essential to the healthy development of the children, their self-images and their understanding of adult relationships. It is important for parents to be the adults, to set aside their differences (at least overtly) when the children are involved or present and to, as much as possible, present a united front to the children. Parents who can’t do that run a serious risk of making their children the very real casualties of their war.

For more information please see the firm’s website at www.par-law.com. The information in this article is not intended as legal advice. For legal advice you should consult your attorney.

Professionalism Since 1996 Bonnie M.S. Reiss

Selected as “Super Lawyer” by NJ Monthly 2006 - 2020

Peter C. Paras

Selected as “Super Lawyer” by NJ Monthly 2006 - 2020 Included in Best Lawyers in America 2015 - 2021 2020 Justice Daniel J. O'Hern Award Recipient

Patricia E. Apy

2015 ABA Grassroots Advocacy Award recipient Selected as "Super Lawyer" by NJ Monthly 2019 - 2020

Michael J. Fleres NJ Supreme Court Certified Matrimonial Law Attorney

A Professional Corporation For The Practice of Family Law 2 Bridge Avenue • The Galleria • Suite 601 • Red Bank, NJ 07701 • Tel: 732.219.9000 • Fax: 732.219.9020 • par-law.com

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HIGHLANDS TO HOLLYWOOD Kevin Smith’s Journey as the Hero Slacker

BY CATHY PADILLA

A fluffy cloud with an iron core. That’s how Kevin Smith has been described on set and how he characterizes his 50-yearold self. The kid who grew up in Highlands, sitting in the cheap seats of a matinee movie with his old man, didn’t know he had what it takes to make movies or become part of the Hollywood elite. Until he turned 21, his dream was to marry a local girl and hopefully not work at the post office. But his father’s silent encouragement enabled his love for movies to turn into what Kevin describes as the ability to get paid for making pretend for a living. Last month was a hectic one for the director, actor, and screenwriter as he announced the completion of the first draft of his screenplay for Clerks 3, a much-anticipated sequel in the series that started with the 1984 cult classic that launched his career. Filmed in black and white in a convenience store in Monmouth County, the movie began Kevin’s reign as the king of slackers and endeared him in the hearts of locals as a cross between every-man and hero. He also relocated his Red Bank P H OTO C R E D I T: C O U R T E S Y O F SMO D C A S T.C OM

comic book store, Jay and Silent Bob’s Secret Stash, to a new larger location. In true Silent Bob fashion, Kevin had planned a parade carrying the famed Jesus statue for his movie Dogma from the old location to the new location. Unfortunately, due to the current pandemic, he was unable to fulfill what would have been a visually unique experience on the streets of Red Bank. Having spent some time in Red Bank and Holmdel in September 2020 promoting his pop-up restaurant Mooby’s, Kevin is immediately at home and still considers himself a Jersey guy despite living in California. Penning the newest episode in the saga of Clerks has him contemplating his adventures, and his connection to home and his family are evident in what he shares. Emotional while speaking of his father, Kevin sees his life as a continuous stream that began in his childhood home and has shaped his entire career. Whether you know him as Bluntman, Silent Bob, or just the guy who always wears that purple jacket, here is our interview with the incredibly open, touchingly sentimental, and one-of-a-kind Kevin Smith.

CM: Can you describe who Kevin Smith has become? Kevin: I’ve certainly not learned to respect other people’s time, unfortunately. That is a flaw that has existed since childhood and still exists to this day as a 50-year-old man. I don’t put a lot of negativity in the world. I’m a pretty easy guy to get along with, I’m very engaging, and I’m all about hey, you want to make some art? Let’s do it and stuff. I’ve been described on set as a fluffy cloud with an iron core. I was told by this one guy, ‘you’re all gushy and soft, not edgy. Easy to be around, you just glide around like a little cloud. But at the center, you know exactly what you want. You know the story you’re going to tell, and if people say let’s do this, you’re like no, this is it. Everything is a specific way and it’s what makes you a director.’

what gives you your voice. (Jordan was right, by the way, and I moved the scene.)

CM: Where does “knowing exactly what you want” come from? Kevin: That goes back to childhood. If you’re playing Star Wars and somebody does something different, you’re like, well you can’t do that. You’ve got to do it this way. Even as a kid I remember being, I wouldn’t call it bossy so to speak, I remember as a seven-year-old playing on the playground of our Lady of Perpetual Help where I went to school from first grade to eighth grade before I went up to Henry Hudson Regional where I went to high school, I remember being very specifically the guy who organized, saying this is what you’re going to do, you’re Luke, you’re Han, I’m Darth Vader, this is Princess Leah, this is going to be the Death Star… and go! I didn’t know that that was a job until years later. I didn’t know what a director did. I knew who a director was, Steven Spielberg, he made Jaws, and I love Jaws. George Lucas was a director, he made Star Wars, I loved it. I knew there was such a thing as a director, but I thought you had to be born in Hollywood to do that sort of thing, I didn’t know just a normal person could do it. And I didn’t know it comes from this weird mindset of, no, I know exactly how everything should be. That is the directorial mindset.

CM: Can you relate to your father’s dream? Kevin: For my father it was all about his family. I love my family. I’m married, I have a kid. My kid is doing well in life, I think I’ve done okay as a parent. But that was not my dream, I mean in high school it was, to get married, but for me the dream was never like my father’s.

CM: How does the “directorial mindset” play out in your movies? Kevin: I’m writing Clerks 3; I finished my first draft and gave it to my producers to read. Jordan Monsanto, that’s Jason Mewes’ wife, and Liz Destro, I’ve been working with them for years. So, Liz says, ‘this one scene in the third act is fantastic, but it just happens too late. Move it up to here and that will inspire the character and stuff.’ My first instinct was, no you can’t do that. It has to happen where it happens. And that’s not true. There’s no truth to that, it’s just my preference. And it’s taken me 50 years to conceptualize that, to understand that there is no one way. What makes it the one way is your choice, and that’s what makes you an artist. That’s

CM: When did you know that movies were your art? Kevin: My father, who I loved deeply, worked at the United State Post Office. It was the bane of my father’s existence. He didn’t want to work, least of all work for the post office. My father was never like, what’s my career, what’s my dream, what do I want to do in life? I asked him about that, I said Dad, I dreamed about being a film maker, what did you dream about when you were a kid, what did you want to do? And he was a little stunned, like what do you mean? Do you think I failed or something? I guess I phrased it in a way that it could have been taken in a number of ways, but my father said, ‘my dream was to get married and have my own family.’ And I was like, wow, your dream came true at age 28 and you’re living your dream ever since. His dream had nothing to do with wanting people to look at what he would do and have people say good job and give him a thumbs up. My father’s idea of working at the post office was, well, I guess this will pay for things. This will pay for the life I want, which is I want to hang out with my wife, I want to hang out with my kids, I want to go see the country.

CM: How was your dream different? Kevin: When I was a kid all I wanted to do was marry Kim Walker, even all through high school, but on my 21st birthday I saw Slacker. I had always been a movie fan, but that was the movie that made me say, maybe I want to make a film? If this counts as a film, I can make a film.

MO O BY ’S M A D E I T S O F F I C I A L MOV E TO R E D B A N K F O R O N E W E E K O N LY (S E P T E M B E R 18 – S E P T E M B E R 25, 2020). TA K I N G OV E R G I A N N I ’S P I Z Z A (15 W I KO F F P L AC E , R E D B A N K ), T H E S O C I A L LY D I S TA N C E D P O P - U P GAV E FA N S T H E O P P O R T U N I T Y TO S A F E LY I M M E R S E T H E MS E LV E S I N TO T H E WO R L D F I R S T C R E AT E D BY SM I T H I N T H E 1999 F I L M , D O GM A . P H OTO C R E D I T: C AT H Y PA D I L L A

CM: Did your parents support your dream? Kevin: They took us everywhere, even though we were a single income family, lower, lower, lower middle class, still my father was engaged with the world, he wanted to see places. He took his family to almost every state in the United States when we were kids. We would fly, on Eastern Airlines, ‘cause my mom really knew how to stretch a buck, or we would drive, or we took a train trip once on Amtrak across the country in 1979. That was when we came out to California because I liked movies. We were three kids; I’ve got a brother and sister who are older than me. Virginia, and Donald, who is four years older than me to the day. He’s had to share his birthday with me almost his entire life. And when that younger brother, the little cute one, goes on to become a movie maker, ugh. I love my brother, thank God he loves me, because he would have every justification to hate me. But he seems to really dig me, and I certainly dig him. CM: Were your siblings movie buffs? Kevin: My brother and sister were older than me and the way my old man bond-

CONTINUED >

ed with me was he would take me to the movies. He’d pull me out of school at noon for a matinee, and that was how we spent time together. The language of cinema, he didn’t even speak it. We just watched movies together and talked about them on the way home. That was it. That was my training, that was how I became a filmmaker. My father didn’t know what he was doing, but he was training me, forging me in the fires of cinema. He never once said to me, you should do this. Ya know, you could do this. People didn’t say those things to kids back then. Nobody fed you pipe dreams or told you, you can do anything. But he never dissuaded me. It just never occurred to him to be like, you should try this. Because we didn’t come from that world where anything was possible. CM: Sounds as though your dad showed you encouragement by supporting what you liked. Kevin: That was my father, and he was a mystery to me because I was a kid, and that’s how I figured out who he was. He wasn’t me. I’ll tell ya everything about my life, but my father wasn’t that guy. I was young, so he wasn’t like oh I’ll have all these deep conversations with the kid. But that’s how I learned who he was, by watching what entertained him. What he would take me to see. What he would share with me through art.

day. So that was what I was interested in seeing. I’m a big Star Wars fan. And there’s a picture on my Instagram of me and my brother leaning in front of the footprints of the Star Wars characters. As we were leaving, my old man said to me, ‘Maybe you’ll be here one day.’ Not like I had ever said I was going to make films; I was nine years old. And 40 years later me and Jay got to put our footprints and handprints in the Chinese Theatre court. We’re there now. And that’s not for everybody. If you’re in this business you’ve got a real good chance of getting your star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, because there’s lots of sidewalk. But the forecourt of the Chinese Theatre is where movie legends are. Currently it’s the Avengers. Spielberg, Lucas. The Harry Potter Kids. And then there are Jay and Silent Bob, Kevin Smith and Jason Mewes. So that’s the kind of life I’ve had, and it’s never been separated from the kind of life I was raised in. CM: Can you tell us about Clerks 3? Kevin: The plot is that Randall has a heart attack and almost dies. He realizes he’s done nothing with his life and there’s no one left behind to even tell his story if he dies. And he says, ‘F#$% all that, I’m tired of watching movies, I’m going to make a movie.’ So, Dante and Randall essentially make Clerks. There is a lot of reflection in the movie. There is also a lot of humor, seeing scenes from the original Clerks being played out in the movie, today, with the same actors who are like 25 years older. But for me it’s like all this s^%& happened yesterday.

CM: As though no time has passed? CM: Do any of those movie experiKevin: When it happens to you, when it’s yours, you know I made it with a bunch of ences stick out in your mind? people and they were involved, but I was Kevin: Taking me to see Raiders of K E V I N F E AT U R E D C A L I C O, T H E F O O D C I RC U S the driving force. It didn’t happen way back the Lost Ark before anybody heard C LOW N , I N T H E F I R S T F E W M I N U T E S O F H I S 20 06 when, it happened yesterday. I know these about it, day one, when it first came F I L M C L E R KS I I . O R I G I N A L LY B U I LT BY A N D F O R movies backwards and forwards. They’re out, before all the buzz. My father F O O D C I RC U S G RO C E RY S TO R E , I T I S S T I L L O U T S I D E C I RC U S W I N E S , B E E R & S P I R I T S . ( W I T H P E R M I S S I O N the story of my life. For me, none of this was so happy because he said it was F ROM K E V I N SM I T H ’S I N S TAG R A M) stuff ever ended. like the kind of movie he would go see when he was my age. The same CM: Are you older and wiser now? way I love and embrace the Marvel movies because they Kevin: I’m older and wiser, but it’s still me. Because that was the endeavremind me of my happy childhood spent in a movie theater. And I’m sure people say, isn’t a happy childhood spent or. Why go through all of this, why create a rocket ship and try to go to the outdoors? I’m like, no, not mine. So that’s what we had, me moon, unless you’re avoiding some other job. And that’s what this has all and the old man. He knew I liked Hollywood and movies, been. All of this has been avoidance of real work, I just never wanted to do that I knew directors’ names, I knew producers’ names what my father did. He hated his job. He worked nights and used to have even though I wasn’t quite sure what the job entailed. I just my mother call and tell them he was sick. He would never call out himself. knew that they were in charge. I recognized screenwriting Then one time my mother said no that he had to do it himself. And he was names, and we would sit through the credits. So, in 1979 terrified to do it. So, he told me to call. I was like 15, and was like ‘I’m going to we came out to California on an Amtrak ‘cause the old man do it?’ These phone calls were legendary in my house. The only time I ever thought, let’s take him to see Hollywood. We didn’t have a saw my parents bicker was because of these phone calls. So anyway, I’m sleeping car or anything like that. We were lower, lower, now doing this call, and he gives me all this prep of what I can say and not lower middle class. Actually, the older I get the easier it is say. And I finally get to make this call that has defined my father’s life, and to say, we were poor. That train trip, I’ll never forget it. this is how it went: Post Office: Dispatch. Kevin: Yes, Don Smith won’t be in tonight, he’s sick. CM: Sounds like that trip had a huge impact on you. Post Office: Okay. Kevin: When we got out to California, it was 1979, so the Click. That was it. My father gave up so much time, so much stress, and he characters from Star Wars had just put their footprints in wasn’t a healthy guy, he was a diabetic. He died at age 67. He dreaded this front of Grauman’s Chinese Theatre. So, you had R2D2, phone call. And when I heard that phone call I was like, this is what ruled C3PO, Darth Vader’s footprints and those are still there to-

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his life? I never want this. Jobs suck. I don’t ever want to work for anybody. Because in my world that’s all anybody had, a job, they didn’t have a career. CM: So, you wanted a different life? Kevin: So the whole point was to keep life from becoming grown up. Don’t get me wrong, I love my parents, I don’t want you to have the impression I didn’t want to be them. I just didn’t want to work like my dad. I’ve tried to be like my parents as a married man and as a father, my whole life they were my role models and taught me to be me. But then unintentionally taught me to be me by feeding me a steady diet of movies. I discovered who I was not in a church or school, but in the temple of the cinema.

“STUFF” KEVIN HAS DONE With 39 Producer credits, 66 Acting credits, 38 Writing credits, 30 Director credits and the list goes on, there is too much “stuff” to list! Here are the highlights: Awards: Kevin Smith Directors Award given out by the Monmouth Film Festival; 2008 Lifetime Achievement Award from Atlantic City Cinefest; 1994 Cannes Film Festival for Clerks: winner, Foreign Film Award of the Youth and Mercedes-Benz Award; Edinburgh International Film Festival for Clerks 2: winner, Audience Award; Empire Awards: Winner 2005 Independent Spirit Award; MTV Movie + TV Awards for Clerks 2: winner, Dirtiest Mouth Moment…and the list goes on and on with many more. 1994 Clerks (Writer, Director, Producer, and Silent Bob) 1995 Mallrats (Writer, Director, Silent Bob) 1997 Chasing Amy (Writer, Director, Silent Bob) 1997 Good Will Hunting (Co-Executive Producer) 1999 Dogma (Writer, Director, Silent Bob)

K E V I N SM I T H A N D JA S O N M E W E S AT B E L L WO R KS I N S E P T E M B E R , 2020. P H OTO C R E D I T: C AT H Y PA D I L L A

CM: Movies shaped your world? Kevin: My dad didn’t shy away from showing me movies that weren’t age appropriate. I’ll never forget, I was 12, and my dad took me to see the World According to Garp. There’s some grown-up stuff in there. But it was more the human drama of an entire life that was too mature for a 12-year-old. My old man trusted me with that. He was like, ‘this kid’s not an idiot. He’ll understand this.’ And because of that, he bred a very sentimental, nostalgic soul in a young kid. Even at age nine and ten I would look back on things as, oh what have we lost. If there was a well in Highlands, you would have found me sitting on it, leaning there, and thinking thoughts. He bred a thinker. CM: The kid from Highlands, the slacker, found a way to have the life he wanted. Is he still in there or are you all grown up? Kevin: The kid in me is still there, and that’s a good thing. The personal journey so far, I’ve absolutely loved it. I do feel like I’ve grown as a human being, I’ve grown as an artist, and I’ve retained just the right amount of childishness, the forever 16 nature of my work, I mean look, I dress like a 12-year-old still. I’ve been able to keep that alive while still developing as a human being as you should in order to relate to people in the world. If I were some raging man-child I would not be married for more than 20 years at this point. So clearly, I’ve been able to mature as needed and stay completely immature for the work, as necessary. To read and hear more of Kevin’s interview (uncut, unedited, and unfiltered), visit CommunityMagazineNJ.com.

2000 Vulgar (Executive Producer) 2004 Jersey Girl (Writer, Director) 2005 - 2009 Degrassi: The Next Generation (TV Series) 2006 Clerks 2 (Writer, Director, Executive Producer, and Silent Bob) 2012 - 2018 Comic Book Men (TV Series; Executive Producer) 2013 Jay and Silent Bob’s Super Groovy Cartoon Movie 2016 Yoga Hosers (Writer, Director, The Bratzis) 2017 - 2018 Supergirl (TV Series; Director 4 episodes) 2019 Jay and Silent Bob Reboot (Writer, Director, Silent Bob) 2020 The Simpsons (TV Series; Kevin Smith character) 2020 (Pre-production) Masters of the Universe: Revelation (TV Mini-Series; Executive Producer) 2020 (Announced) Sam and Twitch (TV Series; Writer, Director, Executive Producer) 2021 (Announced) Clerks 3 (Writer, Director, Producer, and Silent Bob)

Local Business Donates Custom Masks to Red Bank School

Accepting the donation on behalf of Red Bank Primary School was Cathy Reardon RN, CSN (left) and Principal Maria Lozzi. This operation was made possible by Dr. Jared J. Rumage, Ed.D., Superintendent of Schools of Red Bank.

David Halbout and Nathalie d’Iris, owners of French Fix LLC in Red Bank, donated custom-made masks to the Red Bank Primary School in January. Valued at $1000, the 60 masks are red and black to honor the school colors and meant for children with special needs. The masks have an adjustable elastic around the head feature, which makes them easy to adjust to any head size and easy to keep on. Halbout also donated 60 masks to a third-grade class in Leonardo that have built-in lanyards with adjustable ear loops. “I was inspired to create this type of mask after witnessing a neighborhood kid dropping his mask in a puddle while running to catch the bus,” said Halbout. “Even though there are some lanyards out there, they often break and are not as durable.”

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Rumson St. Patrick’s Day Parade for 2021 is Cancelled

Dr. Mitchel L. Friedman & Dr. Julia D. Cintron We are so very excited to announce that we are once again able to provide dental 539 Newman Springs Road • Lincroft, NJ • (732) 945-5393 services for you, our valued patients. While things are certainly not “business as usual,” www.LincroftDentist.com we wanted to let you know we are here for you in our clean, comfortable, and safe environment. Our standards are well “above and beyond” what the American Dental Association and Centers for Disease Control recommend. We love what we do and the people we do it for. We are always here for you.

Here are a few things we have done to ensure safety for everyone who comes

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By Susan Murphy Rumson Parade Committee Member Jamie McManus regretfully shared that due to the continued health pandemic, the Rumson St. Patrick’s Day Parade Committee, in conjunction with the Rumson Town Council and the health department, has decided to cancel the 2021 Rumson St. Patrick’s Day Parade. “With an abundance of caution for the health and safety of the community, we cannot hold the parade, but the community still needs the services of our local organizations, such as our 2021 beneficiary Shore House NJ. In fact, it’s even more critical that we help support mental health access during this critical time,” noted McManus. “Although we cannot be together, we can celebrate a significant milestone. During the past eight years, the Parade raised more than $200,000 for local community organizations. We are grateful for your support in helping the Parade achieve this significant milestone and to continue to fund the important services Shore House NJ and local organizations in the area provide to our community. We look forward to being able to celebrate together at the 2022 Parade.” Shore House NJ is a community-based, non-residential psychosocial rehabilitation and recovery program that empowers and restores hope, independence, and self-worth for people living with a mental illness. With more than one in five Americans struggling with mental illness, Shore House has been doing its best to help those in need. For more information, visit shorehousenj. org. Donations are greatly appreciated and needed. To make a donation, visit the Parade website at rumsonstpatricksdayparade.org. The Rumson St. Patrick’s Day Parade celebrates Irish heritage and provides charitable gifts to local organizations improving the community. To date the Parade has provided support to over 22 local organizations that also strongly believe in the spirit of giving.

· · We have replaced all 3 HVAC ventilation systems & upgraded the filters to MERV 16, the highest filtration available. · · All have UV (ultraviolet) systems to sanitize the air as well as Reme-Halo air purifiers that are constantly functioning. Patient bathroom been made as “hands as possible: motion sensor lights,room · ·Arrangements havehas been made to replace thefree” carpeting in the hallways & reception fan, soap, hand sanitizer, faucet & paper towel dispenser. · This Patient has been made free”ways as possible: motion sensor lights, highbathroom level of service is just oneasof“hands the many that we are supporting our fan, soap, hand sanitizer, faucet &inpaper towel dispenser. community, and it is included the excellent work that we do, we go through a

This high level of disinfection service is just oneevery of thepatient manyisways that comprehensive after cared for.we are supporting our community, and it is included in the excellent work that we do, we go through a comprehensive disinfection Drs. Friedman & Menon along with all team members here at Newman Springs Dental after every patient is cared for. Care, will continue to go our patients...it is secondSprings nature. Dental For Drs. Friedman, Menon, andabove Suri, and and beyond all teamfor members here at Newman thiswill andcontinue many other many of ourforpatients have trusted their care withFor us this for and Care, to goreasons, above and beyond our patients...it is second nature. decades. We very many much oflook seeing you, their your care family, andusyour friendsWe very many other reasons, ourforward patientstohave trusted with for years. very soon. much look forward to seeing you, your family, and your friends very soon.

Drs. Mitchel Friedman | Aparna Menon 539 Newman Springs Road • Lincroft, NJ • 732.945.4660

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The Raine Sisters, from left, Carol, Marianne, Joan, Patti, and Sue.

Sister Act Rooted deep in the town of Hazlet is a love story for the ages. It began in the late 1950s when Joan and Vince Raine chose the Bayshore area to call home. They would settle and raise a large family that includes their son, Vinnie, and their five daughters, Susan, Carol, Marianne, Patti, and Joan. Learning more about their history is like unearthing a rare jewel, one built on loyalty and love for family, God, and community. According to the Raine children their parents taught them by example, to give back, and to always help others. Through the years, in addition to taking care of their six children, Joan and Vinnie provided shelter and food in their Hazlet home for community members who were struggling to make ends meet. Thanksgiving was a time to invite guests, sometimes almost strangers, to dinner who otherwise did not have a holiday meal to enjoy. When a teenage boy who was friends with the family needed a place to live, Joan and Vince welcomed him into their home. Joe Collins became part of the family. They called him their seventh child, and just like their other children, he lived with them until he was old enough to live on his own. The sisters agree their parents gave freely without wanting any recognition. In fact, as a family they resisted taking credit or talking with others about their giving. The mom, Joan, grew up an only child; her older brother died from pneumonia at only two years old. Her daughters share that their mom’s dream was to have a big, happy, loving family, who made a difference in the community. Decades later, the Raine sisters are a leading force in giving back in Monmouth County and beyond. Chances are that if you live in Monmouth County, you probably know one or more of the sisters already. Get them in a room together to socialize, and it feels like an immediate party. They are self-confident, accomplished, smart, conversational, and full of life. They each possess a great sense of humor, matched by an easy laugh.

The Love Story and RAINE of Altruistic Giving Continues They talk at the same time, switching subjects and finishing each other’s sentences. They enjoy making quick fun of each other, taking turns with witty jabs, and infectious laughter. All of them have deep respect and gratitude for their parents and recall many of the reasons they love them so deeply. Their love for family is so palpable that they often tear up as they talk. They laugh and attribute this to their mom who they say would cry very easily because she was so compassionate and caring. It’s for certain that as much as the sisters make fun of one another, they would also fiercely protect each other from anyone outside the circle poking fun at one of them. They are tight. Joan and Vinnie’s firstborn, the former Susan Raine, was crowned Miss Hazlet of 1971. Today you would know her as Sue Kiley, Monmouth County Freeholder Deputy Director. Sue lives in Hazlet with her husband and is the mother of five grown children and 11 grandchildren with one on the way. Last year the county rolled out a first-of-its-kind program with Kiley at the helm, called Monmouth ACTS (Assisting Communities through Services). It successfully brings together county resources to match with the needs of community members. She has also been on the forefront of county management regarding the pandemic. Along with other members of the Freeholder Board, Sue has been instrumental in implementing the CARES Act to assist businesses and organizations with grant opportunities. She provides daily county COVID-19 updates, and partners with organizations like the Grunin Foundation to provide free COVID-19 testing and much more. A true public servant, Sue is often helping community members behind the scenes and not seeking recognition. That altruistic family tradition is evident in the work she accomplishes every day, and all the various charities she assists in her capacity as a board member. Sue also serves on the executive board of the RAINE Foundation, a Continued on next page

501(c)(3) founded by her sister Patti (Raine) Dickens in 2001, funeral, with his own words,” shared Joan. “He also told us all to help families of 9/11 victims. in his eulogy to ‘take care of each other always and take care of Today, the RAINE Foundation provides support for the your sainted mother’.” underprivileged year-round, but Christmas is the busiest time According to the Raine sisters, their mom Joan was a of the year for the charity. Patti (Raine) Dickens lives in Hazlet devout Catholic with a deep devotion to the Blessed Mother, with her husband Matt, and they are the parents of three and she instilled the importance of faith in her children all their children. RAINE is an acronym for Reaching All In Need Every lives. Day, but few realize Raine is also Patti’s maiden name. “There are a few sayings our Dad instilled in us because “I don’t want it to be about me or my family’s last name,” he raised us to be strong women,” said Sue. “He knew women shared Patti. “RAINE is much bigger than that. It’s gotten so big were equal to men and pushed us to understand we could and I don’t want to take credit or receive extra attention. RAINE accomplish anything we wanted to do. He would say, ‘Sue, it’s is now about all the volunteers and everyone RAINE helps.” a man’s world and you need to figure out how to deal with it.’ It RAINE helps thousands of families throughout the year, was his way of saying, just because the world is a man’s world, every year. In November, RAINE delivered hundreds of families doesn’t mean you can’t do everything and be who you want to complete Thanksgiving feasts. In December 2020, RAINE be. He pushed us to be leaders. When we accomplished goals, delivered more than 3,000 gift requests, double the requests he wanted to know what was next. He always believed we from last year. could do anything, so we did too!” “The need is greater than ever, but we know that our Before Sue was elected to the position of Monmouth volunteers are more committed to helping than ever before, County Freeholder, she was a sales executive, and before that a and we make it happen,” said Patti. nurse. Carol spent 25 years on Wall Street trading International All the sisters and their families, and hundreds of local Money markets. As a V.P. for Tullet Prebon, she managed the volunteers, have been involved in helping RAINE during the overnight and short date trading desk. Carol retired in 2005 past twenty years. from that career and works as a marketing executive for Maser “I love that so many people from the community feel a Consulting. Patti enjoyed a successful career in NYC, first in commitment to RAINE and know that they can help others just the legal field, and then as Director of Human Resources for a by being a part of it,” said Patti. “ I am very proud to say that medical publishing company. Currently she is enjoying her new all of my sisters now sit on the Board of the RAINE Foundation ‘encore’ role at the Diocese of Trenton, working with parishes in and are very active in making sure our goals are accomplished. the Development Office. Joan has had a long successful career They join an amazing group of volunteers who have remained in the insurance business and is an active volunteer for Feed committed to the focus and mission.” a Friend, an organization that provides food for the homeless When talking about their mom, Marianne commented, population in Charleston, South Carolina, where Joan now lives. “Our mom lived her life giving back by helping others. It was a Marianne has enjoyed her career and currently works in a job natural way of life for her, and we all learned by her example.” she loves for Senator Joe M. Kyrillos. “Our mom taught us that ‘You need to treat everyone The sisters also recalled a time when the whole family equally, treat others as you would like to be treated,’ and that is was in crisis. Carol was diagnosed with advanced breast how we live our lives, and how we in turn teach our children to cancer, and six months to the day of her diagnosis Patti was live,” Joan added. “Our dad taught us to be strong and our mom diagnosed with breast cancer. Then right after Patti, Joan was taught us empathy and compassion.” diagnosed with so many pre-cancerous lumps that she had a “Our father loved local politics. He was Chairman of the prophylactic double mastectomy. The sisters and their families Republican party in Hazlet and served on the zoning board and came together like an army to fight it. Their motto during this the planning board,” noted Sue. “He was the funniest man I time, “When you’re walking through hell, keep walking!” ever met. He could make anyone laugh. A very dry sense of Carol’s daughter, Erika Rech, and Marianne’s son, Mike humor he was a ranking officer in the Toastmaster Association.” Ruane, were both 15 at the time. They were devastated The sisters all adore their father. During the beginning watching the women they love suffer through the breast of the interview, we sat in a room where there hangs a large cancer journey. In typical Raine fashion, the two 15-year-old photo of Vince. cousins started a charity called Breast Intentions, a 501(c)(3). “He had five daughters who absolutely adored him, and he They began selling t-shirts, candy, and bracelets at church to adored us,” said Carol. “We always knew how much our dad raise money for women in financial crisis who were battling loved all of us, and it made us feel very confident throughout breast cancer in their community. Realizing they had to step our lives.” up their game, they held a formal Gala for several years to raise When their father was diagnosed with stage four cancer, funds. All donations raised go directly to families in crisis to he insisted on driving into NYC to deliver gifts to the Sisters of pay rent, purchase wigs, prosthetics, lymphedema garments, the Poor, to distribute to the underprivileged for Christmas. transportation to and from treatments, co-pays, utility bills and “I said Dad, what are you doing?” commented Marianne. so much more. Today, Breast Intentions operates in New Jersey “You’re stage 4 cancer and you’re delivering gifts everywhere! and Illinois. Joan serves as the treasurer, and like the family’s He said, ‘Mar, I’m crammin’ for finals!’ He always knew how to other charitable commitments, the whole family supports it. make us laugh, even when he was dying.” “My dad taught us strength and our mother taught us After he passed, Vince Raine had a packed crowd of people compassion and empathy,” said Carol. “Our parents adored laughing at his funeral when the eulogy he wrote for himself each other every day. It was beautiful to watch them together. was read. It began with, “You are probably all wondering why I We all cry so easily, and our father always said to us, ‘It’s ok gathered you here today…” to cry, but never ever in business, don’t cry in business,’ and I “We were trying not to cry because on a good day we are never have. The only time I ever cried at work was on my last all so sentimental, and he ended up having us all laughing at his day, after 25 years, when my entire trading floor gave me a

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standing ovation as I left the building for the last time.” “He would challenge us to debate him on an issue, any political issue,” added Joan. “He was so good at debate and then after he won, he would say, ‘Ok, I’m taking the other side now let’s switch,’ and we would start over and he would win that round too! He was so good at it, and he was the funniest man I’ve ever known. He had a quick wit, and he could make anyone laugh with his dry sense of humor.” The sisters say their brother Vinnie, who lives in Florida with his wife Noelle, possesses the same great sense of humor as their dad and with the same delivery. When their father died he left his business, a collection agency, to Vinnie who has now grown it into a successful national business. “We always felt the love our parents had for us, and every day we felt the love they had for each other,” shared Patti. “I know that the saying is ‘there is no perfect marriage’, but I always felt our mom and dad had a perfect marriage. They loved each other so much every day. They were kind to each other always.” “When dad passed, mom said, ‘my bags are packed and I’m ready to go,’ and that’s what she said on the day she died,” added Carol. “They loved each other that much.” When Joan was that young girl wishing to have a large happy family someday, she could not have imagined the dedicated children she gave to the world, to carry on her legacy of altruistic giving. The kindness she showed her own family is shared every day as they treat others the way they want to be treated. The real-life love story continues.

BEGIN HERE.

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An Alternate Ending for a Local Landmark MEET YOUR NEIGHBOR: SCOTT NOVICK BY CATHY PADILLA What many of us considered an aging location that held great memories, Scott Novick saw as an opportunity. Alternate Ending Beer Co. (AE) opened its doors in October in what once was the movie theater in Aberdeen, honoring both childhood memories and a forward-thinking business model. The brewpub is unique to our area, offering in-house brewed selections and food by the owners of Talula’s in Asbury Park. Scott managed to keep part of the movie theater experience alive with a renovated screening room and special brews that often give a nod to some of his favorite actors. Chuckle Heads, available this month, honors Kevin Smith and Jay Mewes as the stars of the month at AE. Living in Colts Neck with his wife, Jen, his daughter, Nora, his son, Carter, two dogs, two barn cats, and 12 alpacas, meet your neighbor Scott Novick. CM: What is the mission of your company? Scott: To make thoughtful beer and food with the highest standard of service in a unique, yet casual, setting that feels both modern and nostalgic. CM: What made you choose a brewpub? Scott: First and foremost, I’m passionate about brewing and drinking beer. Second to that, I chose the brewpub model over a production brewery because there are not many brew pubs compared to regular breweries in NJ. I knew if we could make incredible beer and partner with a well-established restaurant that shared likeminded standards of quality and community, we could really set ourselves apart not only in NJ, but the entire country.

CM: Are you the only owner? Scott: I have eight family and close-friend investors: my right-hand CFO Jenn Perler, left-hand head of Creative Alexis Castellano, and restaurant partners Steve and Shanti Mignogna of Talula’s. CM: Why did you choose the movie theater? Scott: The movie theater really chose me. It fell into my lap, and the location, space, and potential were too great not to jump on. It’s special to me because the people who live in Aberdeen and the surrounding communities have so many memories here, from their very first movie in a theater (which is my memory), to a first date, to a first kiss, and so on. Even though the space is completely renovated and being used for a different purpose, those memories are still alive and well. CM: What sets you apart from others doing what you do? Scott: I think the totality of the five areas of our business. 1. The quality of our beer, which our head brewer Brendan Arnold and Assistant Brewer Steve Grodinsky hold to the highest standards. 2. The unbelievable food we have been creating in the kitchen, which has been developed by one of the finest restaurants in all of NJ and executed by our exceptional Head Chef Kate Gagliardi. 3. The level of service our team, led by Anthony Celis and Sarah Giordano, gives on a nightly basis. 4. The incredible space that Krissy Skuback Interiors of Asbury Park has designed for us. And 5. Investing in the brand from the very beginning with the help of talented designer John Turner of BoyBurnsBarn. If you bring all of that together, we have something special that just about everyone can enjoy. Our customers come to AE for the total experience. CM: What is the most rewarding part of your career? Scott: Watching our customers enjoy their beer and food, and occasionally over-

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hearing them use profanities (in a good way!) to describe our space. CM: What comes next? Scott: Right now, I just want to get through COVID. And even though I sometimes joke saying I’ll never do this again, I have another idea for Aberdeen… CM: What is the most challenging part of what you do? Scott: Finding a balance between being inside the brewery (production area) as often as possible and staying for dinner service. But more importantly, trying to be a good husband and father while dealing with an incredible amount of stress, fatigue, and responsibility. CM: Your best life or business tip to share? Scott: If you have a good idea, believe in yourself but be patient, calculated, and surround yourself with great people. I certainly couldn’t have done this alone. Surrounding myself with honest and smart people was the only way this could have happened.

CM: Do you have a favorite quote or mantra? Scott: I love quotes, so it changes often, but right now knowing I have to make hard decisions that potentially hurt our bottom line, I always go back to “Always do right; this will gratify some people and astonish the rest.” CM: Who has most influenced your career or life? Scott: My mom, Diane. She was basically a single mom during what should have been the greatest years of her life. Under difficult circumstances she still taught me to be honest and caring, which I will hopefully pass on to my kids as two of the greatest attributes one can have. She was fortunate enough to marry a great man, who also had a remarkable influence on my life. CM: What do you do when you’re not working? Scott: I think about work. Sorta kidding. We just built a house with a farm where we are raising alpacas and will soon farm enough land to hopefully supply the brewpub with produce and fruit for brewing. I

try to be with my wife and children as often as I can when I’m not working. CM: Why did you decide to honor Kevin Smith and Jay Mewes with one of your brews? Scott: To paraphrase Brodie, I can say about a million things, but I can’t express myself monosyllabically enough to fit within my allotted time. The beer is a double IPA that always has two hops and evolves every time we brew it by changing the two hops we use. The can is one of our first “What If” scenarios, which is What If Jay and Silent Bob were really Cheech and Chong? Putting aside the obvious reason they can be synonymous, the main factor is they are iconic duos of brothers who aren’t really brothers. Both pairs only function properly when together, which is pretty special. Personally, I have a great memory of meeting Kevin and Jay in the late 90s. Jay had a broken foot and we spoke on a bench for a minute, but Kevin signed my Mall Rats poster of them with an arrow to his stick figure saying. “I look fatter in real life.” I still laugh seeing it, and now I realize it must be hung somewhere in AE.

CommunityMagazineNJ.com FEBRUARY 2021

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Pet Celebs Lemmy of Asbury Park Augustus of Colts Neck

Casey Perosi of Navesink

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Dashiell of Fair Haven

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Dasy of Holmdel

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Dusty of Little Silver

Buddy & Belle of Holmdel

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Noodles of Middletown Atticus of Holmdel

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Karl of Fair Haven

Leo of Holmdel

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