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Bob Speaks!
Pop culture icon Kevin Smith dishes on his secret to staying organized. On the Cover: Photo by Ben Leuner/AMC
34 Pump Up the Volumes We’ve got the most compassionate summer reading list ready for you. 36 Law Abiding Citizen Comedian Jimmy Dore gives us his shtick on why he the drug war sucks. 40 Awesome Octo Yoko Ono is still going strong— at age 80! 44 On Display Not all museums are about fancy sculptures and paintings. 52 In the Footsteps of Jah The secrets of Jamaica’s leastunderstood faith are revealed. 54 Oldie But a Goodie This stash might be 2,700 years old, but it’s still green. 58 Ain’t No Dummy Beak’s Geoff Barrow sure hopes you don’t play pop music. 60 Love-Hate If you like insanity, Today is the Day’s Steve Austin has just the thing. 64 Under the Skin “Bad ass’ doesn’t begin to describe Kid Ink’s rap credentials.
18 LA Consequential Angelenos will be asked to consider three— count ’em—three MMJ initiatives this month. 22 Puzzling Paradox Our government just seems to want it both ways. 26 A New Wave? Dispensaries in NorCal fight back—and that may be good news for SoCal. 30 Beauty and the Grotesque Artist Barnaby Ward creates fantasy worlds. 6 CULTURE • MAY 2013
66 Creeping the Faith Mindless Self Indulgence pushes the envelope. And then some. 70 Technical Furor This time, Dillinger Escape Plan had more freedom to be creative. 75 Totally Edible Looking for cool, funky eateries to sink your teeth into? We’ve got ’em. V I S I T U S AT i R e a d C u l t u r e . c o m
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departments News Nuggets
Cannabis makes headlines here, there, everywhere—and we give you the scoop—PLUS our latest By the Numbers.
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Letter from the Editor
Our federal government is wrong . . . but not always.
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Destination Unknown
It’s wet, it’s wild—welcome to the playground for the rich and beautiful: Uruguay’s Punta del Este.
Profiles in Courage Our latest feature provides insight into the life—and struggle—of a medical cannabis patient near you.
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LEGAL CORNER
Keep pistols and pot separate from each other.
Strain, Edible & concentrate Reviews Our ever-popular sampling of amazing strains, edibles and concentrates currently provided by your friendly neighborhood dispensary.
Healthy Living
Why it’s important to keep your doctor informed—and, sometimes, educated.
Cool stuff
From the DabR vape pen to the Mutewatch Svart, if it’s a cutting-edge product or cool lifestyle gear, we’re all over it.
shooting gallery
Here are the green-friendly things we saw you doing around town.
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GREEN SCENE
It’s time to get your hands dirty—literally—in the garden.
Recipes
Spring has sprung—and so will this light and refreshing menu inspired by Mother Nature’s greenest season.
entertainment reviews
The latest films, books, music and more that define our culture—plus Kevin Longrie’s best Liner Notes Ever!
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130 | LETS DO THIS 134 | NEWS OF THE WEIRD 8 CULTURE • MAY 2013
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Vol 4 IssUE 11
letter from the editor Publisher
Jeremy Zachary
GET YOUR CLICK HERE
www.iReadCulture.com
Roberto C. Hernandez Editor-In-Chief
A
Study in
Contradiction
Editor-in-Chief
Roberto C. Hernandez
Arts & Entertainment Editor Evan Senn
Editorial Contributors
Dennis Argenzia, Ngaio Bealum, Ashley Bennett, David Burton, Grace Cayosa, Jasen T. Davis, Alex Distefano, David Downs, Carolina Duque, S.A. Hawkins, John Hedrick, James P. Gray, Lillian Isley, David Jenison, Liquid Todd, Kevin Longrie, Dan Macintosh, Meital Manzuri, Bruce Margolin, Sandra Moriarty, Damian Nassiri, Arrissia Owen, Paul Rogers, Lanny Swerdlow, Matt Tapia, Simon Weedn
Photographers
Steve Baker, Bettina Chavez, Kristopher Christensen, John Gilhooley, Amanda Holguin, Khai Le, Mark Malijan, PJ Russo
Cannabis has no medicinal value. Cannabis has medicinal value. Which one of these statements is true? Ask someone who has studied cannabis and you’ll get a pretty clearcut answer: the chemical compounds of the cannabis plant offer a whole host of health benefits. It does have medicinal value. But ask some of the narcocrats running the federal government— say the Drug Enforcement Administration, the White House, etc.—and you’ll get the same ol‘ party line, ripped straight from the pages of the Controlled Substances Act: “no currently accepted medical use in treatment in the United States.” And yet . . . and yet . . . our own federal government contradicts itself. Yes, the same government that tells us cannabis cannot be used as medicine is the same government that provides hundreds of pre-rolled joints to the four surviving participants of its Compassionate Investigational New Drug Program—a program that’s been in place since the 1970s and was specifically set up to provide Americans with government-grown cannabis to treat a medical disorder. When President Obama was interviewed by Barbara Walters last year, all he could lamely say when asked
about legalizing cannabis is stuff like: “this is a tough problem” and “there are a number of issues that need to be considered.” Meanwhile, as patients suffer through life, seek relief and clamor for access to a plant that grows naturally, there are other folks who spend their time sharing and dispensing the truth. Just ask the National Cancer Institute or the National Institutes of Health, and these agencies will talk to you about cannabis’ “direct antitumor effect” or about the patients who were able to “obtain relief” for their cancer or neuropathic pain . . . thanks to cannabis-derived medicine. Talk to the National Center for Biotechnology Information or the National Library of Science and they’ll share with you info about how “moderate marijuana use is associated” with reducing the risk of cancer. Did I mention that these last four organizations I just mentioned are part of the federal government? The same government that says the exact opposite? So if our own government can’t make up its mind—who can patients turn to and trust with factual, relevant, propaganda-free information about medical cannabis? You’re holding it in your hands right now, my friends. Enjoy this issue. c
Interns
Joe Martone, Gabriela Mungarro, Derek Obregon
Art Director
Steven Myrdahl
Graphic Designers
Vidal Diaz, Tommy LaFleur
Director of Sales & Marketing Jim Saunders
Account Executives
Jon Bookatz, Gene Gorelik, Shane Harms, Justin Marsh, Beau Odom, John Parker, Dave Ruiz, Kim Slocum, April Tygart, Jatonia Zeigler
Office Manager Iris Norsworthy
Office Assistant Jamie Solis
Online Marketing Jackie Moe
IT Manager
Serg Muratov
Distribution Manager Cruz Bobadilla
Culture® Magazine is published every month and distributes 45,000 papers at over 1,200 locations throughout Southern California. No articles, illustrations, photographs, or other matter within may be reproduced without written permission. Culture® Magazine is a registered trademark of Southland Publishing, Inc. All rights reserved. 2175 Sampson Ave. | Suite 118 Corona | California | 92879 Phone 888.694.2046 | Fax 951.284.2596 www.iReadCulture.com
CULTURE® Magazine is printed using post-recycled paper.
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THE STATE U.S. Rep. Dana Rohrabacher proposes R-ES-P-E-C-T for state MMJ
Orange County-based Congressman Dana Rohrabacher has authored legislation that would prohibit the federal government from prosecuting people who follow their state’s medical cannabis laws, according to The Orange County Register. The Respect State Marijuana Laws bill would strengthen access in the 18th states (plus Washington, D.C.) with compassionate laws on the books. “This bipartisan bill represents a common-sense approach that establishes federal government respect for all states’ marijuana laws,” Rohrabacher said. “It does so by keeping the federal government out of the business of criminalizing marijuana activities in states that don’t want it to be criminal.”
Assemblyman Ammiano’s MMJ regulation bill makes it through round one An Assembly bill to create a regulation office for medical cannabis is proceeding, according to The Press-Enterprise. Assembly Bill 473—which proposes to create a state Division of Medical Marijuana Regulation and Enforcement—has passed its first round of approvals, passing the Assembly’s Public Safety Committee last month, in its journey to become law. Assemblyman Tom Ammiano (D-San Francisco), a very vocal
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supporter of MMJ, introduced the bill—though he introduced a similar bill that he later withdrew last year. “Greater certainty and uniformity are urgently needed regarding the rights and obligations of medical marijuana facilities, and for the imposition and enforcement of regulations to prevent unlawful cultivation and the diversion of marijuana to nonmedical use,” Ammiano said in a committee analysis of the bill. This division the bill proposes would fall under the state Department of Alcoholic Beverage Control to “regulate the cultivation, manufacture, testing, transportation, distribution and sale of medical marijuana.”
San Diego reboots and opts to revive older proposal to regulate MMJ
It’s back to the drawing board for San Diego. After pro-MMJ Mayor Bob Filner proposed an ordinance that would allow dispensaries to operate in the city, the City Council instead opted to reboot its own failed plan from two years ago, according to U-T San Diego. An ordinance proposed in 2011 would have limited dispensaries to some commercial and industrial zones and required them to be at least 600 feet from each other as well as schools, playgrounds and other “sensitive” areas. They would have also been
required to hire security guards and operate as nonprofits. Filner’s proposal had called for a $5,000 permit fee and a 2-percent excise tax. The mayor’s plan was also considered less restrictive than prior proposals.
THE NATION Attorney General: Massachusetts towns and cities cannot enact MMJ bans
Cities and towns in Massachusetts cannot enact bans on MMJ dispensaries, according to a decision from the office of Massachusetts Attorney General Martha Coakley, according to 90.9 WBUR. Such a ban— Coakley’s decision read—would “frustrate the purpose” of the medical cannabis law—Question 3—voters approved last November. Cities, however, are permitted to enact zoning bylines and other dispensary regulations, according to Assistant Attorney General Margaret Hurley. Hurley said Massachusetts’ MMJ law “could not be served if a municipality could prohibit treatment centers within its borders, for if one municipality could do so, presumably all could do so.”
Oregon introduces new medical cannabis regulations
Oregon’s largely unregulated medical cannabis industry could be facing some changes. State lawmakers have proposed HB 3460, a bill that aims to regulate surplus MMJ as well as ensuring that qualified patients can receive the medicinal plant. This bill also requires a background check for business owners, as well as documentation of how much MMJ a facility receives and from which state-registered grower they get it from. If passed, HB 3460 would also require MMJ outlets to test their cannabis products for impurities.
Maryland Gov. Martin O’Malley says he is likely to approve cannabis “research centers” Maryland might become the next compassionate state. State
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lawmakers last month approved a bill that would allow MMJ programs to set up shop at participating medical research centers in the state, USA Today reports. Gov. Martin O’Malley has said he expects to sign the bill into law. The programs are not expected to be operational until 2016. A participating medical research center would be required to specify the types of conditions it would treat and the criteria by which patients would be allowed to participate. The center would provide all patient and caregiver data to the state health department. The department could make this data available to law enforcement. State Delegate Dan Morhaim told USA Today that Sinai Hospital in Baltimore and John Hopkins have expressed an interest in participating or are considering it. “Maryland has taken a small step in the right direction, but more steps are necessary for patients to actually obtain the medicine they need to alleviate their suffering,” Amanda Reiman, a policy manager for the Drug Policy Alliance, said in a statement.
THE WORLD UK researcher: Crime and drug use do not increase because of cannabis reform
Foes of cannabis—who claim that there is a distinct link between cannabis use and crime—have no friend in UK criminologist Alex Stevens. The criminology professor recently refuted several media reports claiming that reducing penalties for cannabis possession has led to increases in drug use, crime and health problems. Saying such statements are unfounded and based on faulty data, among other things, Stevens says cannabis use and crime actually decreased since the plant was reclassified in 2004 by the government as a less dangerous substance. Steven cited the British Crime Survey—which estimated crime fell by 17 percent since 2004—and the “Survey of Smoking, Drinking and Drug Use Among Young People in England,” to back up his conclusions.
by the numbers
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The estimated length (in feet) of a giant joint seized by police at a UC Santa Cruz rally last month: 4 (Source: Los Angeles Times).
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The estimated weight (in pounds) of the giant joint: 2 (Source: Los Angeles Times).
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The percentage of Americans who say cannabis should remain illegal: 45 (Source: Pew Research Center).
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The percentage of Americans who were pro-legalization in 1991: 17 (Source: Christian Science Monitor).
The estimated number of cannabis users in Uruguay: 150,000 (Source: Bloomberg BusinessWeek).
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The monthly cannabis “ration” (in grams) that a Uruguayan 18 years+ could register for from the federal government: 30 (Source: Bloomberg BusinessWeek).
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The estimated dollar amount (in billions) that legal cannabis sales will generate this year in the U.S.: 1.5 (Source: The Huffington Post).
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The fine (in dollars) for operating an unregistered MMJ facility under proposed Assembly Bill 473: 25,000 (Source: The Press-Enterprise).
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The estimated dollar amount (in billions) that legal cannabis sales will generate by 2018: 6 (Source: The Huffington Post).
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The estimated value (in billions of dollars) of California’s cannabis crop: 14 (Source: TIME magazine).
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The number of dispensaries per 28,000 residents proposed by Measure D in L.A.: 1 (Source: kcet.org).
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6
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The percentage of Americans who say cannabis should be legalized: 52 (Source: Pew Research Center).
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The percentage of Americans who were against legalization in 1991: 78 (Source: Christian Science Monitor).
The percentage of Americans who supported legalization in 1969: 12 (Source: Gallup Poll).
Mumford & Sons
Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the past year (and in that case, thank you for loyally reading CULTURE out of your hovel) you’ve probably heard Mumford & Sons on the radio or your iPhone several times over by now. These folk rockers have been dominating the charts for some time, making this one of the most prolific bands to have an ampersand in the name (sorry Of Mice & Men). Despite originating from London, these guys have a down to earth sound that blends well with the rapid-fire banjo strumming the group is known for. Though the band have been around a few years, its newest song “I Will Wait” has been the single that has made the world crazy with folk fever, opening the doors for other similar acts like Of Monsters and Men (no ampersand). Enjoy them in the great outdoors, but leave the moonshine at home.
IF YOU GO
What: Mumford & Sons in concert. When/Where: June 2 at Glen Helen Regional Park, 2555 Glen Helen Pkwy., San Bernardino. Info: Tickets $46-$75. Go to www.mumfordandsons. com.
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FLASH
{By David Downs}
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Los Angeles voters can decide the fate of local medical marijuana dispensaries using their May 21 general election, but it’s an open question as to whether Angelenos will show up to vote. L.A. ballot Measures D, E and F each offer different flavors of medical cannabis regulation in the largest—and most notoriously unregulated—MMJ city in the world. But voter turnout is expected to be no more than 21 percent of eligible voters. That means the future face of medical marijuana in the sprawling city of 3.8 million will be left up to the politically active few, says Don Duncan, with patient lobby Americans for Safe Access, which is campaigning for Measure D. “We have to get out our votes,” he says.
THE MEASURES
Measure D would radically cut the number of L.A. collectives from an estimated 300-1,000 that are currently open down to about the 135 or so open prior to a 2007 moratorium. Collectives would also have to follow a set of rules like moving away from schools and churches and paying a 6-percent sales tax. (MMJ sales in L.A. are currently taxed at 5 percent atop existing 9-percent state and local sales taxes). Measure E would do the same as Measure D, but without the sales tax hike. Measure F would not cap the number of L.A. collectives, but rather allow them that follow city rules to register in order of oldest to newest. Offering one collective per 28,000 residents, “Measure D sort of puts a lid back on things,” Duncan says. “We don’t know if it’s enough [collectives], but if it’s not either the City Council or the voters could go back and do another initiative,” he says. Few are campaigning for Measure E, because its creators have thrown their support to Measure D. The City Council-crafted Measure D has the most mainstream support, including L.A.’s City Attorney, the Los Angeles County District Attorney’s Office, ASA, the Greater Los Angeles Collective Alliance and the local United Food and Commercial Workers Union. Proponents of “Yes on Measure F” did not return requests for comment, but stated in the press that Measure D or E is a job and tax revenue-killer. Measure F also mandates cannabis safety testing, which the others do not.
APATHY
But there’s plenty of evidence to indicate Los Angeles voters may reject all three measures. Voter turnout was a “pathetic”
21 percent in the L.A. March primary, and is expected to be the same, says Karen O’Keefe, California policy director for the Marijuana Policy Project, the advocacy group that helped legalize cannabis in Colorado in 2012. None of the referendums’ supporters have released polls touting their measure’s impending success. Deg’e Coutee with the small Patient Advocacy Network in Los Angeles, speaks for many who are saying, “Make it really simple for people. Just say ‘no, no, no’ to all the measures.” Special interests who want to “squeeze other people out” bankrolled them all, she says. MMJ activists will be able to sit down after the election with the city’s new mayor, city attorney and DA and, “we’ll be drafting something more reasonable, more fair and more transparent.” The referendums are useless, she says, because if any measure wins, affected clubs will sue to stay open like they have in the past. “It’s kind of the L.A. way, ‘Oh, of it passes, we’ll just sue ’em.’ You know?” Coutee says. O’Keefe and Duncan say fresh lawsuits against a victorious Measure D would prove meritless. “All the provisions in Measure D have been tested in court,” Duncan adds.
WORST CASE SCENARIO
An even bigger police crackdown could hit L.A. if all measures fail, Duncan says. Last fall, the City Council ordered the Police Department to work with the Drug Enforcement Administration (DEA) to shut down clubs. Raids are commonplace in the L.A. basin, and all the clubs in LAPD District 14—the Eagle Rock area—have been reportedly closed. “In the absence of an ordinance all of the facilities will be deemed illegal,” Duncan says.
Still, “I don’t really see them doing a clean sweep of the city,” he says. O’Keefe called a clean sweep “politically suicidal” for the City Council. Instead, the status quo would likely remain. The police would keep playing a futile, decade-old game of whack-a-mole with the clubs. The largest MMJ city in the world would continue to be a black eye for the movement globally. “The worst case scenario is not worse than what we have so far as the [public relations] goes,” Duncan adds.
NEW CHIEFS
Mayoral candidate Gil Garcetti is the front-runner to be elected the new mayor of L.A., many sources report. Garcetti has endorsed taxing and regulating recreational cannabis and should be elected, says O’Keefe. Opponent Wendy Greuel has been less supportive of cannabis law reform. “You’re talking about electing the mayor who will preside over the biggest city in California when it legalizes adult use of marijuana in 2016. That’s huge,” O’Keefe says. And all MMJ activists want patients to vote for Mike Feuer in the L.A. City Attorney’s race. Feuer is a tepid supporter of cannabis law reform, but his opponent, Carmen Trutanich, has been a thorn in the side of MMJ for years. City Attorney Trutanich argued all collective sales were illegal, and endorsed banning all L.A. clubs. O’Keefe, Coutee and Duncan called Feuer the lesser of two evils. “We’ll see if the cannabis community realizes what’s going on and gets out and votes,” O’Keefe says. The last day to register to vote is May 6. clerk.lacity.org/elections/index.htm
Inside Man
Los Angeles voters need not feel they lack a sympathetic voice on the council. Councilman Bill Rosendahl, 76, is a cancer patient who has been very public about his use of cannabis to tackle his illness. In a recent Los Angeles Times story, Rosendahl—who has had 13 hits of radiation and seven rounds of combination chemo—praised a Westside collective for helping him. “The brain is back, the energy is back,” he told the Times. “Life is now worth living.”
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FLASH
Mixed Messages ANALYSIS: Is cannabis medicine or not?—our federal government can’t seem to decide {By Matt Tapia} So, does the cannabis plant possess medicinal properties? Does this controversial plant provide health benefits to suffering patients? Like many questions in life . . . it depends on who you ask. If you ask our federal government, you will get answer—two, actually: Cannabis has no medicinal value . . . and cannabis has medicinal value. Sound contradictory? It should. Yes, the same government that continues to tell us that the cannabis plant “has no currently accepted medical use” also tells us that cannabis-derived medicines were successful in treating patients suffering from cancerrelated and neuropathic pain. Why would one arm of the federal government—the White House, the Drug Enforcement Agency, et. al.—completely refute the scientific claims of another arm—the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services’ National Cancer Institute (NCI) or National Institutes of Health (NIH)? Whatever the answer is, this isn’t the first time something like this has happened—and it’s enraged patients, advocates, activists and those championing cannabis as medicine. “The federal government’s continuing attack on people [recommended] medical cannabis by their doctors is hypocritical considering the benefits reported by its own National Cancer Institute,” Matthew Pappas, a patients’ rights attorney for Advocates for
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the Disabled and Seriously Ill, said recently via a written statement. In 2011, the National Cancer Institute posted information on its website confirming what other doctors, patients, scientists and researchers have said for years: the chemical compounds in cannabis can provide medical benefits to cancer patients. “In the practice of integrative oncology, the health care provider may recommend medicinal cannabis, not only for symptom management, but also for its possible direct antitumor effect,” read the NCI website on March 17. Curiously, this passage was later changed and the “direct antitumor effect” wording was deleted. The paradoxes continue: Despite the fact that the Nixon administration successfully passed the Controlled Substances Act, which, again, considers cannabis as something with “no currently accepted medical use,” our federal government continues to send cannabis to patients . . . for “medical use” as part of the Compassionate Investigational New Drug Program—four patients remain alive. Ironically, this country’s first ever medical cannabis patients got their meds from Uncle Sam. Researchers from UCLA and Harvard—as well as scientists from Spain—have also documented cannabis’ cancer-fighting effects during the ’90s and ’00s. And just earlier this year, the National Cancer Institute, on its cancer.gov website, posted new information about a study of 43 patients who were able “to obtain
relief of their cancer-related pain with long-term use of the delta-9terahydrocannabinol :cannabidiol oromucosal spray.” The institute also posted new information about a trial of 39 patients “with neuropathic pain who were treated with medium-dose, lowdose or placebo vaporized Cannabis that found that vaporized Cannabis produced comparable analgesic effects at both doses compared with placebo; psychoactive effects were minimal and well tolerated.” The information are part of the Institute’s Physician Data Query (PDQ) database which the agency itself describes as a summary that provides “comprehensive peer-reviewed, evidence-based information about the use of Cannabis and cannabinoids in the treatment of people with cancer.” In 2009, the National Center for Biotechnology Information (NCBI)—part of the National Library of Medicine—posted an abstract of U.S. research stating: “Our study suggests that moderate marijuana use is associated with reduced risk of [head and neck squamous cell carcinoma.]” Last year, the NCBI posted information about a study in Spain: “Cannabinoids: a new hope for breast cancer therapy?”The abstract stated that “[e]xperimental evidence accumulated during the last decade supports that cannabinoids, the active components of Cannabis sativa and their derivatives, possess anticancer activity.” “Cities that ban dispensaries are denying patients the ability to obtain a medicine the federal government’s National Institutes of Health says fights cancer and they’re doing it with the Obama administration’s help,” Pappas said. Why would one federal agency completely undermine what another agency has said? Good question. Our federal government owes us the answer. c
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FLASH
Waste of Resources
“The lesson for other jurisdictions is that we should stop wasting our resources on prosecuting lawful medical cannabis cases,” attorney Joe Rogoway says. “The term ‘medical cannabis prosecution’ should be an oxymoron at this point.”
“A Teachable Moment” Dispensaries survive a local police crackdown in Vallejo, with lessons for the entire state {By David Downs} Dispensaries hoping to fight local police sweeps might want to look to Vallejo, where dispensaries and their attorneys have successfully fended off charges stemming from a major sweep in February 2012. According to several Northern California attorneys who specialize in MMJ cases, law enforcement in the bankrupt town has wasted hundreds of thousands of dollars raiding and prosecuting Vallejo clubs only to see each and every case get dismissed this spring. “Attempts to stymie Vallejo medical marijuana have failed,” attorney Omar Figueroa tells CULTURE. “Apparently there are more dispensaries now than before.” The Vallejo rout bodes well for dispensaries in other battleground cities, too, attorneys say, because any collective can use
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the defenses raised in Vallejo. The story illustrates how cops have lost a powerful tool to harass lawful dispensaries, and it comes down to a single major court decision. Back in 1996, Californians approved medical defenses against cannabis crimes like growing and possession. Those protections expanded from patients and caregivers to collectives in 2003. But anti-MMJ cities dug in their heels, sometimes arguing that cancer patients must grow some pot to be lawful members of a collective. This “make ’em grow it” theory led to the 2012 conviction of San Diego dispensary operator Jovan Jackson. Jackson and patient lobbying group Americans for Safe Access appealed, arguing patients needn’t plant cannabis to be lawful collective members; indeed, the whole point of a collective is such that some can grow for all.
A California Appellate Court agreed on Oct. 24, finding that “the collective or cooperative association required by [state law] need not include active participation by all members in the cultivation process but may be limited to financial support by way of marijuana purchases from the organization.” The Appellate Court overturned Jackson’s conviction, so San Diego appealed to the Supreme Court with support from the District Attorney’s offices of Sonoma, Sacramento and Los Angeles, and The League of California Cities. On Jan. 16, the California Supreme Court declined to review or “depublish” the Fourth District Court of Appeals ruling in People v. Jackson. In other words, patients don’t have to grow to be lawful members of collective. They can pay cash for it. That decision stymied Vallejo law enforcement’s plans. Back in February 2012, the Vallejo Police Department raided at least six dispensaries—sometimes repeatedly—and charged their operators with cannabis sales, arguing some patients were not growing, hence the entire club was illegal.
Over the winter, defense attorneys used the fresh People v. Jackson decision as a shield, and it has worked. Better Health Collective and Life Advanced Services beat the rap. Red Dog Green’s charges were dropped in February, according to lawyer Joe Rogoway. Greenwell dispensary’s case was dismissed before the preliminary hearing in March, says Figueroa. Vallejo dispensary operator Matthew Shotwell, star of Discovery Channel’s Weed Country, also got off. “Given the facts of this case . . . the people feel they cannot prove this case beyond a reasonable doubt,” Deputy District Attorney Jack Harris [reportedly] told Solano County Superior Court Judge Allan Carter on March 21. Vallejo PD’s sweep was a total rout, says Paul Armentano, a Vallejo resident and national spokesperson for NORML. “Cases have now been dismissed in every dispensary raid brought by VPD in their 2012 sweep. That concludes our game. Thanks for playing.” The rout is also a teachable moment for all California law enforcement, Rogoway says. “I think it’s because of . . . People v. Jackson. [Vallejo prosecutors] just couldn’t prove [dispensaries had committed] any crime.” c
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BUZZ
Exotic & Hypnotic Barnaby Ward’s Beautiful Creatures {By John Hedrick} Barnaby Ward is a fascinating UK-Barbados transplant artist who relishes in the challenge of drawing true beauty. At 3 years old, he moved to Barbados where he lived until college. After a few years of Toronto, he moved back to Barbados where he lives and works today. His training is in graphic design, but his artistic influences lie in the work of artists like Egon Schiele, Rene Gruau and the beauty-salon-adorning works of Patrick Nagel (you’ll know it when you Google it). His work might seem daunting, but he’s a bit like what a graphic novelist or an illustration artist is expected to be like. He’s been to Comic-Con, he likes rum and “macaroni pie.” Who knows what he dressed up as at Comic-Con. . . Probably not as Slave-Princess Leia like you, sicko, but maybe as Mark Hamil as Cock Knocker from Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back. You should have gone as Space Ghost. He just showed work in the “2nd Annual Supersonic Electronic Invitational” at Spoke Art in San Francisco, and his work is beginning to gain national and international recognition. Even from Barbados, which is not exactly a Mecca of commerce, Ward manages to sell works across the
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globe. Granted, with the internet, that’s not as difficult as it was in nineteen ninety-something; his work is good. One might deign to deem it difficult to dislike Barnaby Ward’s drawings. Luscious and subtly dark; Ward’s women embrace their monster counterparts with one part naïveté and one part wickedness. Their strange beastpets call up ideas of Japanese monster-porn somewhere in the dark corners of your brain that you don’t visit often (can’t believe you dressed up as Leia). But lately, Ward’s work has been making its way back into the mainstream world of art galleries and art fairs, revealing new inspirations in his artistic repertoire, and propelling him to start a new series of work. Culture caught up with him and got to discuss Barbados, his loving inspirations, rum and his gorgeous new body of work. When pressed about the women featured in his work, Ward says he draws from his past. “You can probably tell already that my characters are all very similar. The variances are pretty minor—Compiled from lots of different life experiences.” He pulls the women in his work from the past loves of his life. “The profile that I always draw is my wife’s profile. Other aspects date back to first crushes . . . Kind
of a whole psychological mindf@*k really, if you want to get into it. I’m sure a therapist would have a field day analyzing it.” True to ironic form, Ward feels inspired by literary fiction and childlike whimsy, even as an adult. “I never really liked Alice in Wonderland. It was like a challenge to make it in a way that I liked it. So it’s kind of perverted and dark and kinky. I just like the contrast of something pretty with something grotesque . . . It
was like this harmony between something really grotesque and something really pretty and that worked.” Ward shows at times, two distinct and similar sides to the subject. That one may look so young and full of questions and old and full of knowledge at the same time is not only powerful but also idyllic. “I like to create that fantasy world where everything works,” he says. c somefield.com
The Tropical Winds of Change? Artist Barnaby Ward doesn’t understand why cannabis isn’t legal yet—at least in his country of residence. “I have never in my life heard from anyone, even a slightly convincing argument about why cannabis should be illegal. I don’t think anyone else has either,” says Ward. Like all of the Caribbean islands cannabis is illegal, though teeters on socially acceptable by residents and police. Barbados’ Attorney General Adriel Brathwiate said last month that he had doubts his country was winning the war on drugs and said the country should re-examine its existing cannabis laws. According to the Stabroek News, Brathwaite made his remarks while speaking at the opening of a national drug council meeting. He pointed to what he sees as an increase in the country’s cannabis use—particularly by young people—as evidence that its policies are failing. “If you go to football games across Barbados, it is almost the norm. There was a time when the boys used to hide but now boys and girls [are] openly smoking,” he said. c
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BUZZ
Page Against
Machine
the
consider these must-reads for your summer reading list {By Matt Tapia}
The Marijuana Papers edited
The Books of Hashish
An out-of-print classic, this collection of documents, reports and articles from the mostly earlier half of the 20 century showcases how cannabis-related issues—including its medical use—were just as pertinent decades ago as they are now. A highlight is the famous, but now largely-forgotten La Guardia Committee report which— assuredly to the delight of the Anslinger crowd—determined that cannabis and its use posed no danger to the people of New York City.
Before “nug porn” became the new cannaficionado meme, Laurence Cherniak was the world traveler who blazed a trail for—wait for it—“hash porn.” Cherniak traveled to every hash-making corner of the world and captured every step of the way. You’ll never look another guy’s temple balls the same way.
by David Solomon
A Child’s Garden of Grass by Jack S. Margolis
You might call this dated, but we call this a timeless tome from the bell bottom era. From tips on using a waterless glass pipes (“steamboats”) to stern advice about not becoming the best joint roller among your circle of friends (otherwise you’ll become every party’s official joint roller) this handbook still informs . . . and amuses.
by Laurence Cherniak
Medical Marijuana 101
by Mickey Martin, Ed Rosenthal and Gregory T. Carter MD
Simple, to-the-point and easy to understand, Medical Marijuana 101 is for those who ever wished there was an MMJ for Dummies or The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Medical Cannabis. Great for new patients, it contains all the basic, introductory MMJ stuff .
Smoke Signals by Martin Lee
High Times Pot Smoker’s Handbook
Martin Lee dissects the tangle web of cannabis chronicles that have marked our social, medical and scientific culture. Highly recommended.
For decades High Times informed the masses on getting high and getting stoned. We present to you its Tokers Talmud.
Ed Rosenthal’s Marijuana Grower’s
by David Bienenstock and High Times editors
Marijuana Reconsidered by Lester Grinspoon
This unmitigated classic was begun by a writer—and a psychiatrist at that!— who sought out to prove that cannabis was a danger. Lester Grinspoon realized that there was no evidence to back that up. If ever a book needed to be read by the Obama administration, this is it.
The Emperor Wears No Clothes by Jack Herer
The Jack Herer classic that goes beyond being a mere must-read. This is a rite of passage for anyone that gets involved in anything under the rubric of “marijuana activism.” Whether or not you agreed with his methods, you definitely could say that Herer had more passion and drive than 10 activists put together.
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Handbook by Ed Rosenthal
Look up “growing marijuana” in the dictionary and you’ll see a picture of Ed Rosenthal. From the man who knows one end of the plant from the other to his take on how to be an exquisite cultivator, Ed’s words have guided and mentored many a novice thumb.
Marijuana is Safer: So Why Are We Driving People to Drink? by Steve Fox
For those, like me, who wonder why much of Western culture is OK with alcohol—which has great potential for harm and destruction and death—but not with cannabis—which is a benign plant that can be used holistically—Steve Fox clears the air on the subject, debunking every damn myth you ever heard about the plant. c
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FLASH
Standup and Deliver Comic Jimmy Dore: It’s wrong to jump through hoops to get medicine {By Carl Koslowski} Jimmy Dore is one of the few truly bold political comics on the current American scene. His career path has led him to star in several Comedy Central specials, including 2008’s Citizen Jimmy, and host his own nationally-syndicated radio show, The Jimmy Dore Show—which can be heard across SoCal. He’s also one of the regulars on the Current TV series The Young Turks—Dore was among a panel of guests last November that discussed Colorado’s then-pending vote on legalizing recreational cannabis—and has been a frequent talk show guest for both Jimmy Kimmel and Craig Ferguson. But more importantly for CULTURE readers, Dore is a passionate advocate for ending the war on cannabis and MMJ. He not only was a writerperformer of the smash off-Broadway hit The Marijuana-Logues, but he also believes that using MMJ saved his sanity and possibly even his life, due to its strong role in helping alleviate chronic and debilitating pain caused by problems with the vertebrae in his back.
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I’m completely baffled by the Drug War when it comes to cannabis, and how we’re locking people up. There are plenty of productive people out there with no problem, and legit medical uses. Obama and Clinton put more people in prison for this than Republicans. Is it an easy way to look tough on crime? We have to guess because it’s such a crazy thing that the government’s doing. They’re going against the will of the people and this time violently. They’re showing up with M-16s. I saw them bring M-16s one time to my clinic. They closed the street off, all got out with their M-16s and their bulletproof vets. I bet they could have just asked the owner to close down for a day and come downtown but they had to go in with the big guns. They’re cowboys, you give ’em the guns and they’re gonna use ’em. They can’t tell the difference between a problem and not a problem. It’s like if your only tool is a hammer, and every problem is a nail. These guys don’t join the DEA because they don’t want to use them, it’s because they DO. It’s exciting—they can’t wait! You have had a serious need for medical marijuana yourself. I heard you were nearly crippled by pain for years. Yeah, I have a bad back; problems with my vertebrae and stuff like that. I can buy liquor at a gas station in the United States, but I have to see a doctor and go to a clinic and buzzed into a back room in order to buy a joint. Are you kidding me?! You guys should be embarrassed to be doing this to me. You say “I don’t think you’re sick enough.” Well, you’re not sick and you can buy Everclear, no one makes you take a test to buy it. You should feel bad that you make a guy jump through hoops to get his [medicine] of choice when you don’t have to. That’s how I feel about it. c
A
Rocky START Jimmy Dore’s got an opinion on everything. When asked if he though Republicans would embrace ending the war on cannabis in the name of freedom, he said this: “Do you think the libertarians are gonna win that fight inside the Republican party? True conservatives would be against it. They’ve decided the Constitution is optional when it comes to the drug war and the war on terrorism. Isn’t that weird?” ON STAGE Performing May 3-4 at Flappers Comedy Club in Claremont.
www.jimmydorecomedy.com
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BUZZ
This year has been a milestone for artist and visionary Yoko Ono. Not only did the pop icon celebrate her 80th birthday just a couple of months ago, she has also achieved success in the realm of album charts with a new single burning up the clubs. Not bad for an octogenarian(!) “Hold Me,” a single from Ono’s ongoing remix series recently jumped to No. 3 on the Billboard Hot Dance/ Club Play chart. Cowritten and produced by the Grammynominated Dave Audé. But the activist’s work and efforts on various artistic, political and social causes (she and husband John Lennon rallied for women’s rights and prison reform, for example) go back decades— and even included cannabis rights at one point. When poet and activist John Sinclair was arrested for minor possession (giving two joints to undercover cops) in Michigan, Ono and Lennon performed at a 1971 “Freedom Rally” as a show of support. c
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BUZZ
On a
Pedestal
Think museums are just for fancy paintings and statues—guess again! Here are a few of the venues that share their perspectives on our favorite plant
Oaksterdam Cannabis Museum
The Oakland Cannabis Museum (OCM) has been a focus of the community in the heart of Oakland since 2011. OCM exists to educate the public on cannabis history and the medicinal properties inherent in the plant. It has been the only U.S. cannabis museum to have a living medical cannabis garden on display. Originally created with support from Oaksterdam University—a non-accredited forprofit educational facility founded in 2007 by MMJ activist Richard Lee. OCM was raided federal law enforcement in 2012, and is now looking for a more permanent home. oaksterdamcannabismuseum.com
“Cannabis, Coca & Poppy: Nature’s Addictive Plants” at the DEA Museum,
The Drug Enforcement Administration (DEA) Museum in Arlington, Virginia, focuses on the history of drug law enforcement in the United States through exhibits, displays, interactive stations and educational outreach programs. Not surprising, the DEA Museum has a very negative view on medicinal plants like cannabis. Above all else, the DEA Museum stresses the facts that legally, plants like cannabis, poppy and coca are “drugs of abuse,” and only “claim” positive medicinal properties. www.deamuseum.org
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Say What?
{By Evan Senn} “We’re spending taxpayers’ money on putting people away for something so harmless.” —Elijah Wood
Hash, Marihuana & Hemp Museum
The Hash, Marihuana and Hemp Museum (HMHM) in Amsterdam features old tools and implements for turning hemp into rope, paper and clothing as well as a variety of ancient and not so ancient smoking devices. The museum examines hashish, cannabis and hemp using a variety of media from photography and film to books and paintings, both ancient and modern, and an indoor garden located inside the museum. hashmuseum.com
Oakland Museum of California
The Oakland Museum of California (OMCA) has a large collection of poster art that touches on cannabis culture. Operating for over 40 years, OMCA’s focus is on three historically independent disciplines—art, history and natural sciences—all under one roof. OMCA collections—comprising more than 1.8 million objects including historical artifacts, ethnographic objects, natural specimens and photographs explore and reveal the factors that shape California character and identity. From its extraordinary natural landscapes, to successive waves of migration, to its unique culture of creativity and innovation, including a large number of cannabisrelated subjects and fields. collections.museumca.org
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BUZZ
Girlish
Behavior Independent and amazing writer, director and actress Lena Dunham is becoming the female role model for her generation and the younger gens to come. Dunham just picked up a 2013 Golden Globe for Best Performance by an Actress in a Television Series (Comedy or Musical) for Girls on HBO. She also won a 2013 Directors Guild of America Award for Outstanding Directorial Achievement in Comedy Series for Girls on HBO and a 2013 Gracie Allen Award for Outstanding Director (Entertainment) for that show as well. In 2011, her film Tiny Furniture (2010) won an Independent Spirit Award for Best First Screenplay and also won a 2013 New Generation Award from the Los Angeles Film Critics Association Awards for Tiny Furniture as well. In Girls, Dunham shows her protagonist as a strong, slightly awkward, post-college creative, “figuring it out” in a way that has people shocked and embracing this unique and honest portrayal of young women on TV. In her Tiny Furniture film, she touches on issues of sexuality, body image, creativity and art, relationships (both romantic and familial), and truly shows the world what it’s like to be a young girl right out of college, in New York City. And, in two different occasions in her debut film Tiny Furniture, she shares a marijuana moment with her friends. Needless to say: We HEART Lena. c
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BUZZ
{By Joe Martone} We’ve all seen it before: Images of Bob Marley draped in green, red and yellow. Bracelets and hats decked in the colors of the Ethiopian flag. You’ve most likely seen the stereotypical stoner surrounded in a haze sporting a hokey Jamaican accent in a subpar comedy, but there is much more to Rasta than these perceptions, as any true Rastafarian will gladly tell you. In one of the biggest cities of the world—Los Angeles, on a run-down street there is a building in a series of buildings where a group of men, two or three at time, don’t so much preach as just talk, at The First Church of Rasta. It was there that I met King Oji, a man unlike any man I had ever met before. His attire was colorful and casual, a pair of jeans and a tie-dye button down shirt, but even that wasn’t as compelling as his face and demeanor. Well over six feet, his long dreadlocks were gray and matched his gray dreaded beard. His enthusiasm was contagious, and bordered on frightening. His name is “King” for a reason. He says he wants to be the king of black people. I could tell from the beginning I was going to learn much about Rasta from King Oji. First off, there has been some confusion about what to call this ideology, which has theocratic roots and is spoken of with religious fervor. Three terms exist: Rastafarian, Rastafari and Rasta. According to King Oji, Rastafarians are “any race, color, or creed that choose (sic) to follow the doctrine of His Imperial Majesty [Haile Selassie I, the former Emperor of Ethiopia].” Rastafari are “the new black priests and priestesses that have the power to lead black people to progress.” And Rasta is “the gateway to the tomb of everlasting life and the master of death.” You may have noticed that Rasta tends to be Afrocentric. You’d be right, but it’s not an issue of race. According to Oji all life started in Africa, so it’s home to everybody and “we all need to go home sometime.” Oji also says that while Rasta is concerned largely with the promotion of black people, anyone can be a Rastafarian. “It’s not anti-white,” he says, “it’s pro-black.
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There’s nothing wrong with that. Our people have been oppressed. We hate nobody. We can’t have no ‘hate white folk campaign’—that don’t work.” This local branch was associated with many African-American endowment organizations.” He further citied many global Rasta groups, such as the Resurrected Asians Seeking Total Asia, Resurrected Americans Seeking Total America and the Resurrected Africans Seeking Total Africa. (See the trend?) While Africa is important to the religion, Ethiopia is specifically where the strongest ties to the religion are. This dates back to the 14-year rule of Emperor Haile Selassie I, deified in Rasta iconography. Contrary to popular belief, Selassie never denied or confirmed godhood. In his life, he was known for speaking out against war and his beliefs led to Ethiopia becoming a charter member of the UN. Rasta is very concerned with the idea of global peace. “The decision has been made by the world body that there should be true peace, yet there is none,” says Oji. He added that Rastafarians look to the UN for promoting peace. Further elaborating on their ideas of governing bodies, Rastafarians have been more supportive since President Bill Clinton signed the Religious Freedom Restoration Act back in 1993. This act specifically allowed Rastafarians to be in possession of marijuana. Yes, some Rastafarians use marijuana as a meditative aid to help them in worship. Oji stated that, “Some of us do smoke, some of us don’t,” implying that it wasn’t a central issue. Crucial to the idea of Rasta is Jah. Though many sources state that Jah is Rastafarian God, Oji explained this in a different way. “Jah is a man who has God first . . . a knower. A believer believes, a knower goes about doing it,” he says. When asked what people should take away from Rasta, Oji says, “They can make it in America being themselves, and Rasta is true to itself. A world citizen, just being himself.” c rastachurch.weebly.com
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BUZZ
A
Green
Oasis Researchers unearth a 2,700-year-old stash deep in the Gobi Desert
{By Jasen T. Davis}
The Gobi Desert is a 500,000-square-mile section of desert located in northern China. Since most of the area is around 1,000 miles above sea level, it’s very cold, and it’s not uncommon for ice and snow to crystallize on the dunes as the temperature plunges to minus-47 degrees Fahrenheit at night. Despite the inhospitable nature of the region, life can be found throughout including scrub brush, grass, camels, wolves and even bears. But life has been here for millennia, as evidenced by the prehistoric finds unearthed by paleontologists. These scientists’ finds have revealed the fossilized remains of dinosaurs and wooly mammoths. Archaeologists have also found prehistoric tools and cave drawings, proof that early man walked these lands thousands of years ago. Cannabis has also been found here. Still-green cannabis. While excavating a find known as the Yanghai Tombs next to Turpan, northwestern China, Ethan Russo—a visiting professor at The Chinese Academy of Sciences, Institute of Botany—his team uncovered a 2,700-year-old collection of still-green plant material,
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buried with the remains of a Caucasian believed to be a shaman or tribal religious leader. “The individual was buried with an unusual amount of highvalue, rare items,” says Russo. Some of these include a harp, archery equipment and clay jars. Interestingly, a battery of scientific tests demonstrated that the stash harbored psychoactive properties. “We know from both the chemical analysis and genetics that it could produce THC,” says Russo. As further proof, someone had gone to great trouble to pick out all of the male plant parts,
which are not as psychoactive as female cannabis material. The stash was carefully stored in a wooden bowl in a basket made of leather next to the head of the man who had been carefully arranged, along with many tools, treasures and
A True Hero(dotus) The Scythians were barbaric warriors and hunters mentioned by name in the writings of Greek historian Herodotus and in the Bible. They were a black-haired people—possibly originating near the Black Se—who rode horses, forged iron weapons and travelled from Iran to India to China. Although there is still confusion as to where they came from exactly, it is known that the Scythians were also Caucasian. In his writings Herodotus mentioned that the Scythians used cannabis for clothing and in great steam baths, where the leaves were boiled so that the fumes could be inhaled for their health benefits.
other curiosities. “As with other grave goods, it was traditional to place items needed for the afterlife in the tomb with the departed,” says Russo. While hemp finds are common throughout the ancient world, critics of the modern cannabis movement have often insisted that cannabis was only grown for use as rope, clothing and other textile goods. Russo’s groundbreaking research strongly suggests that thousands of years ago, very civilized, highly-skilled, intelligent people grew cannabis for the express purposes of either altering their consciousness or—as some archaeologists have theorized—that it was used for medicinal purposes. Since pipes and other implements were not discovered with the cannabis, researchers aren’t certain if the man smoked the cannabis or not. “Perhaps it was ingested orally,” says Russo. “It might also have been fumigated, as the Scythian tribes to the north did subsequently.” Two-thousand other graves have been found in the Yanghai Tombs throughout the area Russo explored. The cannabis finds and other treasures are currently on display at the Turpan Museum in Xianjing, China. c
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TUNES
Pistol Bristol
The From
Beak/Portishead producer Geoff Barrow wants you to know his band is not a jam band
So how did Beak form? Billy Fuller: Matt Williams had mentioned to me that we should get together and jam. I’m part owner of Invada Records and we got together and jammed for the Christmas party. After that Invada records did something called the Invada acid test. What we did is get players in bands on the Invada Records label together to jam out. Matt Williams played clarinet. So what happened then? Fuller: We had a great time and I said we should do this again in the New Year. As a group we got together in the studio and nothing was discussed. We put some instruments and some microphones in front of us, had a cup of tea and started playing. The first song we played that day was the first song on the first album. What’s the difference between Beak on record and Beak live? Barrow: Live we had to learn exactly what we recorded in the studio. So essentially we’ve had to learn how to play songs we free-formed to begin with. We don’t improvise live or extend the songs. We are NOT a jam band. That would be an insult to us. What’s coming out this year? Barrow: Well the new Thought Forms album [on Invada Records] just got released. It’s a really good album and most of the album is gradual soundtrack music. We have College who is this electronic guy; you can find his stuff on the Drive soundtrack. The Fauns’ new album is really good. It’s a very small label and we only have one person running it. What’s the art and music scene like right now in Bristol? Barrow: Bristol has always had a scene. Growing up we had a really good punk and reggae scene in Bristol. No pop groups have come out of Bristol for a reason: you would get made fun of. Interesting people making noise is what’s popular in Bristol. You have to move to another town if you want to play pop. No pub will have you.
{By Kristopher Christensen} Nervous to meet Geoff Barrow—the instrumentalist for Portishead, a touring bass player for Robert Plant and founder of current project Beak—I spot him and bandmates Billy Fuller and Matt Williams sitting in the pristine noon sun. Greetings abound, and when asked if they want the interview in the shade, the response is, “No because it’s always so cold and dark back in Bristol and this weather is amazing. The sun is energizing us.”
How do you feel about the legalization of medical cannabis? Barrow: It’s weird because I think just legalizing cannabis isn’t a good thing. Everything should be legal. I was never a believer of people smoking weed and it leading to other drugs. Everyone I knew growing up would go get other drugs if they couldn’t get any weed. Some people can handle it and some people cannot. I don’t think weed leads to other drug use. Moderation is the key to everything isn’t it? c www.facebook.com/beakbristol.com
FirmlyPlanted
When he’s not in Beak mode, Geoff Barrow logs in time plucking the low notes for Robert Plant, among other projects. “I did some backing tracks on the new Anika record, and I’m also doing live stuff with Robert Plant again. I’ve been part of Plants’ live band for years. We may be over in the states in June or July . . . We are working on the new Portishead album and have some dates coming up overseas.”
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BUZZ
Visionaries of
Darkness Today Is The Day perplexes and inspires with unique sound and passion {By Alex Distefano} If Steve Austin (not the wrestler) wasn’t in the music industry, he would be a mountain man, embracing the wild outdoors, living on top of a mountain staying away from everything and everyone one he could. His reason: “Because I love nature and I hate people.” This statement might make sense, once you know that Austin is an established heavy metal producer and dark-musical visionary; founder of the cult-like doom metal/grind/experimental noisecore band, Today Is The Day, which has been perplexing fans with a sound unlike anything else in the extreme metal scene. For those unfamiliar with Today Is The Day, imagine a nightmare within a psychosis; musically equal to Eyehategod and Neurosis jamming with Napalm Death, Cathedral and Mastodon. Formed in ’93 in Tennessee, Today Is The Day has been confusing and attracting listeners with a dark and ambient form of extreme music that has included numerous lineup changes over the years with a career that spans nine studio albums. Founding member, vocalist, guitarist and madman Steve Austin recently took time to share his fondness for cannabis, insight into the band’s upcoming 20th anniversary
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tour, how pissed off the corporatecontrolled media makes him and how being a producer affects his songwriting with Today Is The Day. “The first 60 percent of our set is a fast super aggressive attack, and then it turns into a textural mind f*@k,” Austin says. “We really try to put something together that will keep everyone off balance and hopefully scare the shit out of them when it’s over with.” Austin says that although many might view the band as negative or destructive all he sees is raw energy and a cathartic release. He also uses his art to vent about the nature of reality, current events and the destructive nature of the globalized media.
The band is amped up and looking forward to the rest of the shows in its North America tour, and has plans to travel overseas soon after this tour. “Ken Mode and Ancient
“Way Better Than Alcohol” Steve Austin of Today Is The Day opened up to CULTURE about the helpful energy cannabis gives him. “I’ve smoked weed my whole life. I think it’s awesome,” Austin says. “Its way better than alcohol, and for me personally, it covers a spectrum of things. I’m a stressed-out cat, so smoking weed puts me in a laidback mindset. But when it comes to rocking and music, it opens the door to further violence and madness . . . it can be used for many different things, but I just think people should smoke weed more than they drink alcohol.”
Wisdom are going with us all over Europe and it should be a blast. After that, we’re going to go in the backwoods of Maine, and try to put together some of the most hateful, vile, sickening music we can, for a new album, that will come out either early fall or next winter,” he says. Time flies when you’re work is more like having fun, and he admitted that in a strange sense, he always knew the band would be apart of his life. “I hoped and kind of knew that the band would last my entire lifetime; when it formed I got a tattoo of the snake that was on our first record, Supernova. Ever since I got that tattoo, Today Is The Day has been my life; I can’t ever see myself turning my back on it.” c www.todayistheday.us, www.facebook.com/todayisthedayofficial
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BUZZ A Brain and a
Heart
In His Skin
Kid Ink is hardcore—about animal rights! The rapper recently put his hip-hop weight behind PETA’s “Mink, Not Ink” anti-fur campaign (“Be comfortable in your own skin, and let animals keep theirs”). “As much as I just love my pets and animals, I could never think of my dog getting skinned or anything happening to him,” Ink told PETA. “Why wouldn’t I compare that to a rabbit or a fox or any other animal with a brain and a heart?”
Young buck Kid Ink steels up to make major moves {By Dean Mayorga}
Imagine your life going from boring to bad-ass practically overnight. That’s exactly what Brian Todd Collins, a.k.a. Kid Ink, did when he signed to major label RCA Records. If you’ve been keeping up, you might’ve seen his video “Bad Ass” with Meek Mill and Wale that features women dressed as firefighters who are more concerned with throwing water on each other (it’s a rap video, people). But the bottom line is, this kid from MidCity LA who was once a darling of the independents’ is now making major moves. On the cusp of his next album and reaching for a wider fan base, Kid Ink is focused. “I’m just working and recording in the studio,” he tells CULTURE. “That’s the biggest thing is getting the music right.” And so
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far, that strategy has worked. His independent release, Up & Away, debuted at No. 20 on the Billboard 200. His host of singles, such as “Time of Your Life,” made an impression on fans and labels alike. It’s hard to believe he almost chose to stay behind the scenes. As a producer-turned-rapper, Collins’ music places a heavy emphasis on the overall structure of a song. He can write a great verse and a great hook, too. “It, of course, gives me more of a range than some who are just hip-hop artists who are only focused on rapping and aren’t concerned with writing hooks because a lot of the melodies are written for them and given to them,” he says in regards to his producing skills. The No. 1 goal, according to Ink, is to refrain from being repetitive
and to maintain originality. “I honestly feel like I haven’t had much of a chance that I can get out the variety in everything that I can do musically and as a producer.” Variety as an artist from the West Coast can be tough because it means a break with longstanding traditions. However, Ink isn’t sweating the LA, gangster rap paradigm much. “I think it’s not the regular stereotypes from the old West Coast,” he says. “It’s something brand new . . . I don’t really have a concern to make a West Coast sound more than make good music.” But there is one California rapper stereotype even Kid Ink can’t refuse. According to his estimate, he buys about an ounce of cannabis every day and a half or so. “It just depends on the situation,” he
says. “Sometimes you have a party night, studio night, and you run through more than a regular day. An ounce I feel comfortable with.” And why not? The man works hard. Despite his songs becoming the pre-game soundtrack for everybody on their way to the club, Kid Ink isn’t really ’bout that life. Or at least not recently. “Honestly, I haven’t been to the clubs lately,” he said. “I’ve been out of town, on the road or in the studio. I don’t know what’s really the most poppin‘ clubs right now.” For the sake of his next release, let’s hope his work ethic stays that way. Until then, expect Kid Ink to stay grounded on what will surely be a huge year. Up . . . and away. c kidinkmusic.com
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BUZZ O Per N STAG 4 at formin E gM Clu Los b Nok ay ia Ang eles in .
The Secret
Stash
Wicked Fun Insight, jokes and reflection with Mindless Self Indulgence
{By David Jenison}
“That body of Christ, man, it gave us a lot of crackers,” says Mindless Self-Indulgence frontman Jimmy Urine, who talks at a faster pace than Robin Williams in Good Morning Vietnam. “We’re still eating ’em.” The band is on tour promoting its new Kickstarter-funded album How I Learned to Stop Giving a Shit and Love Mindless Self Indulgence—which is scheduled to come out May 14—but our interview took place on Good Friday, which brought a flurry of puns, references and humorous antics from Urine. As religious folk around the globe commemorate Christ’s crucifixion, the NYC-born Urine admits to growing up a Catholic schoolboy. “How do you think I got so beautiful?” jokes the singer, then known as James Euringer. “I got into a lot of trouble because I was very Bart Simpson in Catholic school,” he says. For those of you who know Mindless Self Indulgence, this fiercely independent, genre-bending band has always had a gift of being aggressively fun—like an Easter egg hunt on fast-forward. The fun
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they have making music reaches through the speakers and grabs you by your scruff and forces you to have just as much fun as they are. “My parents allowed me to see R-rated movies, but they were like, ‘We would rather you go see Animal House or Smokey and the Bandit or The Blues Brothers and learn ‘f@$k’ and ‘shit’ than go see Apocalypse Now and be traumatized.’ Most of my classmates didn’t see these movies, and to avoid getting bullied, I would be class clown. Fortunately, the Euringers were not overly concerned with little Jimmy’s potty mouth. “We were not a religious family at all,” he explains. “It was just cheaper to go to the Catholic school, and you got those wicked uniforms. It was like being in prison, but it was one of those fun prisons. You just had to know how to
Jimmy Urine is no stranger to cannabis, and told CULTURE that when he was younger he discovered his father’s secret stash. He began pinching small amounts to mix with tobacco, but his brother ultimately got them caught. As an adult, Urine says he only partakes once every few years. Still, he seems incredulous that MMJ is not yet fully legal. “Whether we are talking about medical marijuana or gay marriage, this is 2013,” he says emphatically. “Let people do what they want as long as it doesn’t hurt others . . . How are we still talking about it? How is it an issue? We just need to legalize the whole thing.” work the system.” While others might also compare Catholic school to jail, Urine can make the analogy based on personal experience—and has on more than one occasion. Dressed to the nines in all pink, he once spent the weekend in a Detroit jail after exposing himself on stage and lighting his pubic hair on fire—just one of many shocking acts Urine’s done in the past (hint: one of the acts involves, well, his last name). And while Urine may not have made his alma mater proud with this Good Friday interview, he is quick to point out an MSI fan who also made angels gasp on this special day. “We are in Tempe tonight,” he recounts. “A guy came to the show dressed as a giant penis and did a stage dive, but he didn’t make it and busted his nuts. It was great.” c www.mindlessselfindulgence.com
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TUNES
Killer
Music The Dillinger Escape Plan returns to school the metal masses
ON STAGE
May 20 at the Chain Reaction in Anaheim.
{By Alex Distefano} a rabid fan base, built through relentless touring over the past 15 years and five studio albums of some of the most genre-bending, mind-altering, über-technical “metal” the world has ever heard. While definitely heavy, the band’s sound isn’t easily categorized. Though many have attempted
Say What?
With an eagerly anticipated album out this month, The Dillinger Escape Plan has an entire year and a half of sold-out touring ahead itself, according to vocalist Greg Puciato. “This is the first time in almost 10 years that we’ve recorded a record back to back with the same lineup and that made a huge difference for us as a band,” Puciato says of new album One Of Us Is The Killer. “When you have to get a new member, you have to teach them everything from scratch. This time around we had more freedom to be creative, and nothing to do between tours except to write music with [people] we already knew that were in the band.” The Dillinger Escape Plan— also featuring founding member/ guitarist Ben Weinman, bassist Liam Wilson, drummer Billy Rymer and guitarist James Love—has
“The only thing pot does for me is it gets me to stop thinking. Sometimes I have a brain that needs to be turned off. Some people are just better high.” —Justin Timberlake
to label the band, Puciato merely says his band’s discography pivots around an insane amount of precision, passion and insanity/ intensity that go into every one of Dillinger Escape Plan’s live shows. The band is also scheduled to participate in Revolver Magazine’s Golden Gods Awards, a metal awards show, and will perform along with Stone Sour, Anthrax, Metallica and other heavy acts. “Last year we were nominated and won—which was a surprise,” Puciato says. “We’re playing this show because it’s a cool opportunity to get in front of a more metal audience again. We’ve never played with Slayer or done Ozzfest or [Rockstar Energy Drink] Mayhem [Festival]. And I feel like the traditional metal crowd knows the least about us. That’s kinda funny, since we’re considered a metal band but never spent much time catering
to that tag. In fact, we ran against it deliberately so we would never get stuck because you never know—10 years ago we might want to sound like Portishead.” In June, The Dillinger Escape plan is scheduled to perform at the Orion Music + More festival in Detroit, which features Metallica, Deftones and other marquee bands. “Playing with Metallica is something I thought of as a kid,” Puciato says. “It was the end-all be-all at that time of my life . . . We’ve been doing this for many years now but we’re still humble and stoked to share the stage with Metallica.” c www.dillingerescapeplan.org
Green Letter Date
Talk about perfect timing. The Dillinger Escape Plan is exhausted from their nearly perfect performance at the three-day New England Metal & Hardcore Festival, which took place on (wait for it) April 20. With that date in mind—plus a lineup that included Opeth, Katatonia, Terror, Hatebreed, Suicidal Tendencies, DRI, Shadows Fall, Anthrax, Municipal Waste and Exodus—frontman Greg Puciato admitted more than one member of the band was thoroughly satisfied with that day, and that performance. “We couldn’t be happier to play this year; there were so many great metal bands all three days. Ten years ago we used to do a lot of metal shows like that then we tried to break out of that to avoid getting pigeonholed into being that type of metal band. But now it feels good to go back to play for those crowds again.”
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Wurstküche
When Downtown Los Angeles’s beloved Wurstküche opened a second location on the Westside, in Venice, there was concern that it couldn’t be nearly as good as the original spot. However, almost a year and half later, the Venice Wurstküche continues to deliver on the delicious sausages and awesome beer selection that those of us already familiar with the Downtown LA location came to expect. Featuring a menu of over 20 sausages; from the traditional varieties of bratwurst and hot Italian to more exotic flavors like rattlesnake, rabbit and jalapeño or alligator and pork andouille, it’s hard not to find something to sink your teeth into. The restaurant has even crafted several vegetarian sausages including smoked apple sage and Mexican chipotle links. Add a side of the incredible, twice dipped, Belgian fries and wash it down with any number of its crisp, ice cold imported beers Wurstküche has on tap for the full Wurstküche experience. Whether you’re looking for a good place for a quick lunch or a spot to enjoy a great dinner with friends, Wurstküche is a restaurant that can suit any of your dining needs. (Simon Weedn)
The Twisted Vine Nestled in a historic downtown location, it doesn’t get much better than Fullerton’s Twisted Vine for the wine, beer and food enthusiast. With its exposed brick interior, ample wine selection and delicious assortment of eats, this place delivers an amazing dining experience. For the aspiring wine or beer aficionado, Twisted Vine offers seasonal wine and beer flights. The flights, three, 3- to 5-ounce glasses of three different wines or beers, are designed to give the patron a unique sampling of the different varieties of the immense selection. The Twisted Vine’s menu also includes a delicious steak panini that has a pleasant horseradish kick, and a tomato and basil soup that is decadent and creamy. Additionally, amongst their assortment of appetizers is the much coveted, brie bowl: a sourdough bread bowl with seasoned and molten brie cheese served with toasted bread bites and apple slices to take care of your dipping needs. Whether you’re looking for a place for a large dinner, an intimate date or a spot for a business meeting, The Twisted Vine offers the ideal environment. (Simon Weedn) MAY 2013 • CULTURE 75
Give It A Rest
While cannabis can be used to help people diagnosed with cancer and AIDS, many patients and medical professionals have found that ingesting the plant can also have an affect on insomnia and sleeplessness. While not fatal, lack of sleep is a very serious condition—one that can have a major impact on your physical (and mental) well-being, influence your productivity and general quality of life. If you are considering using MMJ for insomnia, here are some things to keep in mind.
If you prefer flowers, note that an indica’s sleep-inducing effects will kick in fairly quickly. That two-hour movie you put on—well, you might not make it through the end.
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Consider using indica or indica-dominant strains. Sativa strains are the ones that are typically uplifting and energizing—some patients find them useful as daytime medicine. Indicas, on the other hand, generally make you sleepy.
Edibles take longer to kick in (as little as 45 minutes, as long as an hour or two). Therefore ingest well in advance. Edibles tend to be pretty potent, so plan on getting a good (and long) night’s sleep. V I S I T U S AT i R e a d C u l t u r e . c o m
Illustrations by Vidal Diaz
Insomnia can be dangerous if left unchecked. High blood pressure, stress, congestive heart failure, high blood pressure and other ailments have been linked with insomnia.
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destination unknown
Czech Vantage
Point
Uruguay’s Punta del Este offers travelers South Beach-style sights and soundtracks “If you want to get wild on the beach, the place to come is Punta del Este,” said actress Natalia Cigliuti in a 2001 Wild On E! episode showcasing Uruguay’s top destination. That year, LeBron James played for the Fighting Irish, the first Harry Potter debuted in theaters and Shaggy topped the music charts (twice), while Punta del Este’s international draw was primarily from Buenos Aires and south Brazil. The crowds were wild and wealthy, but it was media outlets like E! that took the town global. A dozen years later, North American and European jetsetters join the Punta crowds for a party that’s sexier, ritzier and more exclusive than ever. “It is a playground for rich and goodlooking people,” says Tamie Sheffield, a world traveler who brokers tickets to select Playboy Mansion parties. “Punta was just for South Americans before, but now it’s worldwide. If you happen to be ‘in the know,’ the villa parties are absolutely insane.”
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Punta del Este is a South Beach-style city that sits on a peninsula, but the designation typically refers to a stretch of coastline extending 20 miles northeast to Jose Ignacio. Along the way, La Barra is a Hamptons-meets-Ibiza town whose famed Bikini Beach overflows with perfectly bronzed Brazilian and Argentine women and self-important men trying desperately to meet them. DJs spin house music on the sand to provide a daytime soundtrack, and when the clock strikes midnight, meticulously groomed crowds flock to the local clubs. Punta’s fame clearly stems from its glitterati-packed nightlife and unfairly blessed bodies because the local beaches are solidly mediocre. Still, the scene goes bonkers from mid-December to early March, and to quote the Lonely Planet travel guide, “Tan it, wax it, buff it” before even considering a visit. With an underwhelming beach, Punta sounds like a hotspot with a limited shelf life, but its enduring legacy is diverse and multi-generational. Brigitte Bardot, the
By David Jenison
Rat Pack and Che “Freakin‘” Guevara were all early fans, and more recent visitors include Bob Dylan, Madonna, Robert De Niro, Simon Le Bon and Leonardo DiCaprio. Colombian singer Shakira rocks a ranch in Punta, and Naomi Campbell and Gisele Bundchen are rumored to have vacation homes. The travel press now calls it the “St. Tropez of South America,” though there are drawbacks to a crowd that admires Kim Kardashian more than Exene Cervenka. Punta del Este, for some, sounds more hellish than shelling out $17 to see Schwarzenegger in The Last Stand. Rented sports cars, yacht-packed marinas and the $100-million Trump Tower construction all feel faker than that rug sitting atop ol‘ Donald’s dome. Still, CULTURE readers who disdain the “scene” may soon have another reason to visit. By the year’s end, Uruguay is likely to become the first country to legalize cannabis. Uruguayan president Jose Mujica is the leading proponent for a new law that would allow citizens to purchase, possess and/or grow established legal amounts. The 77-year-old leader, who donates 90 percent of his salary to charity, believes that cannabis prohibition enriches organized crime, promotes violence and drains the state coffers, and the government launched a three-month public forum on April 4 to educate its citizens. Proactive ideas include a National Cannabis Institute that directs the income from sales into education and health. The proposed law only applies to citizens, so Amsterdam-style “coffee shops” may not emerge, but it is a symbolic step for a continent weary of ineffective U.S. drug war tactics. In the meantime, cannabis is readily available in Punta del Este, and discreet smokers are typically left alone. c
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profiles in courage Patient: Jakki H
AGE: 32
Condition/ Illness:
Neurofibromatosis Type 1
Using medical cannabis since: 2003
Are you an MMJ patient from So Cal with a compelling story to tell? If so, we want to hear from you. Email your name, contact information and details about your experiences with medical cannabis to courage@ireadculture.com.
Why did you start using medical cannabis?
I started using medical cannabis because of my NF1, which is a tumor disorder that causes tumors to grow along the nervous system. My disease is very painful and unpredictable, my neurofibromas range in size and location on my body. I have had eight surgeries to remove countless tumors throughout my body; from the top of my head to the bottom of my feet—some weighing as much as 8 pounds.
Did you try other methods or treatments before cannabis?
I have always had chronic pain, and for years had been misdiagnosed. I have been given pretty much every pharmaceutical for pain—from patches, to shots, to pills . . . I have found healthier ways to ingest my medicine, such as vaporizing with my Extreme Q or eating my favorite edibles like the Peanut Butter Swirl Trikom Treats I eat to relieve my pain and relax my nerves in a safe, healthy and delicious way.
What’s the most important issue or problem facing medical cannabis patients?
I believe that, unfortunately, most people are ignorant to all the benefits of this plant, and if their only source of information is a media that refers to medical cannabis as “pot” or “weed” and the medical edibles I eat—like Trikom Treats—as “pot laced” brownies and not seriously as medicine, it is unlikely anyone will give this wonderful plant the chance and credit it deserves.
What do you say to folks who are skeptical about cannabis as medicine?
First I mention [that] I understand their reservations and then share my story with them about how it has completely helped me cope in a natural way with the pain I experience daily. c
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By Meital Manzuri
State and federal
authorities agree: Medical cannabis and guns don’t mix Whether you’re operating in a state or federal arena, possession of guns and medical cannabis can complicate your life significantly. Cannabis with Guns can Result in More Prison Time than Murder! In federal court, possession of guns and cannabis will increase a defendant’s prison sentence exponentially. For example, in 2004 in Utah, federal Judge Paul G. Cassell sentenced a man who beat an elderly woman to death with a log—to 22 years. A few hours later, Cassell sentenced Weldon H. Angelos, a 25-year-old first-time drug offender, to 55 years. If you think Cassell liked sentencing a small-change drug dealer to more time than a violent killer, guess again, he called it “unjust, cruel and even irrational.” But the judge had no choice. Federal mandatory minimum laws demanded the sentence—a jury found Angelos guilty on three separate charges of possessing a firearm while he sold a half- pound of cannabis for $350. The first charge of possessing a gun during a drug transaction brought a five-year sentence—the second two, 25 years each. That adds up to 55 years. The week before that, the Albuquerque Journal reported on
Say What?
legal corner
“These laws [prohibiting cannabis] just don’t make sense anymore. It’s time for politicians to come out of the closet on this.” —Lt. Governor Gavin Newsom
a case in which a federal judge claimed that he sentenced a man who killed his own mother to 6 1/2 years after he sentenced a 29-yearold mother of three to life without parole because she had a gun while dealing cannabis. The message for Californians who use medical cannabis should be pretty clear: The federal government may go after you for using the plant, and the penalty can be harsh if you possess both legal (in California) medical cannabis and a lawfully-owned gun. Fortunately, there is a mechanism for mercy. Sens. Pat Leahy (D-Vermont) and Rand Paul (RKentucky) are working together on legislation to grant federal judges more judicial discretion under the federal mandatory minimum sentencing system. According to the Feds, Medical Cannabis Users Cannot Possess A Gun! In 2011, the ATF issued a memo that declared that it is illegal for anyone with an MMJ card to possess a gun or ammunition. Violating this could carry a 5- or 10year sentence in federal prison. In Colorado, where nearly 100,000 people use medical cannabis and possessing small amounts is legal, the answer seems complicated. Everyone shopping for a
gun has to fill out federal Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives form 4473. One question on the form is simple: “Are you an unlawful user of, or addicted to marijuana or any depressant, stimulant, narcotic drug, or any other controlled substance?” Brad Buyerstore, spokesman for ATF, said that being an MMJ cardholder bars Coloradans from legally purchasing firearms under federal law. While the federal government has no way of knowing whether applicants have a card, Buyerstore said, the agency takes a grim view of anyone who “knowingly makes false statements in connection with the purchase of a firearm,” and therefore is committing a crime. Recently, a bipartisan group of lawmakers introduced a bill to Congress that would protect residents who abide by state cannabis laws from federal prosecution. Bottom Line: Although some say we need not fear hippies and guns, the intent and history of this law is clear: Government officials want to strongly discourage the mixture of weapons and “controlled substances.” Medical cannabis s relatively new, and the peaceful MMJ salesman is an even newer concept. So, although you may want to cling to the Second Amendment, you must choose—cannabis or guns. c
Attorney Meital Manzuri is a medical cannabis expert, collective consultant and experienced criminal defense attorney. Those with questions about starting a collective or interested in scheduling a free consultation can call (310) 6013140 or go to manzurilaw.com.
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strain reviews GET YOUR CLICK HERE
www.iReadCulture.com
Candy Jack
LSD For all the focus in the cannabis community these days on all things indica, it’s refreshing to see a sativa done right. With LSD, our friends at Greenhouse Herbal Center in Hollywood offer a 100-percent sativa so old-school as to remind of the late, great red-hair sensimilla of the ’70s. The light, finger-shaped buds are so dark green as to be almost brown, and shot through with blood-orange hairs. The perfume and flavor is mellow as Madagascar vanilla with notes of coffee and nutmeg. The name itself is a salute to the variety’s almost hallucinatory effects on the senses. Colors are more vivid, nerve endings more sensitive to touch—and maybe it was just this reviewer—but two hits of LSD and we experienced a roaring sensation in the ears that lasted a full 45 minutes before settling into a gentle background buzz. The strain is excellent for alleviating muscle soreness and PMS without hard chemicals and pain associated with arthritis, migraines or chronic back injuries.
May must be the month for outstanding new sativas. Candy Jack from Clean Green in Marina del Rey is a pure sativa with plenty of qualities to recommend—the power-green and amber buds are fat, fluffy and expertly cured so it burns clean and evenly. The aroma and taste is spicy-sweet, like peppered Lemonheads (if there is such a creature). But its best quality by far is its potency, which, in a market ankle-deep in good green, stands out from the rest. Candy Jack is happy medicine—it lifts the spirit and lightens the load like a natural chill pill. Part of that is due to its intensity—on a scale of 1 to 10, it falls right between the 8 and the 9. But it’s mostly due to the tingly energy it yields, quite literally lifting the spirits to a pleasant state of bemused satisfaction with the universe. We can think of no better natural remedy for depression, anxiety or other mood disorders.
Walter 2014 The folks at Premium Organic Treatments in Garden Grove are so proud of this tasty indica clone that they advertise their collective as “Home of Walter 2014.” It’s easy to see why. The buds are gorgeous—big as eggs, with frosted nugs that are light green at the tips and ash-purple at the bases. It’s a light, leafy strain that lends itself perfectly to both pipe and rolling. We sampled it once and couldn’t quite figure out what its sharp, bittersweet flavor reminded us of. We sampled it again, and then again, before finally determining that taste is pure cinnamon. That might have been one sample too many, as Walter 2014’s effects (22 percent THC) are staggeringly intense. The deep-seated indica effects have a delicate edge to it—perfect for patients in need of serious pain relief but no time for lying uselessly on the couch. That makes it a good remedy for those with arthritis, migraines, cancer and chronic back aches.
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Woody Harrelson OG Poor Woody. For an actor who keeps insisting he isn’t a pot activist, he just can’t shake that image as a cannabis icon. It doesn’t help that Woody Harrelson OG, a 100-percent indica from West Coast Alternative Health in San Bernardino, is such a memorable strain. Dank as Hindu Kush and piney-tart as Head Cheese, this variety’s diamond-shaped buds are so rich with resin it sizzles in the bowl. It burns very hot, making it ideal for vaporizing. The effects of most Kush varieties start out in the pleasure centers of the brain and work their way down. Woody Harrelson OG works in the opposite direction, with a general numbness in the extremities that quickly settles into an almost Quaalude-like brain wrap that lasts for more than two hours. This is cannabis for cannabis patients with serious conditions—the intensity provides just the right kind of relief for those dealing with HIV/AIDS, nausea associated with chemotherapy, MS and glaucoma.
Skywalker OG The Force is strong with this one. An 70-percent indica hybrid from Rocket Meds in Garden Grove, Skywalker OG is about as dank and dark as a strain an without being a purple. The crescent-shaped buds are remarkably lightweight for their density, with ashen hues across its Bavarian-green body that, again, hearken to the notion that there’s some Purple Kush in it. The bouquet is so deeply, ruddily rich and exotic that we wonder if it’s what the band was smoking in that cantina scene from Star Wars. The cerebral effects are almost dangerously powerful—we strongly advise you consume Skywalker OG at home, provided your home is absent heavy machinery. Three hits will put you down—no lie. Some patients might find it too overwhelming, but if you’re looking for a pain remedy for serious illnesses like cancer, MS, HIV/AIDS or neuropathy, it’s the medicine bottle to keep within reach.
512 OG Okay, we have to keep it real. This 100-percent indica from EMC Wellness Center in Riverside is twice as good as 256 OG, but only half the strain as 1024 OG. That said, we certainly give it up to 512 for being the fluffiest, tastiest and most eccentric indica strain we’ve seen since Sensi Star. While its parentage is a mystery, its frosted olive buds have a solidly citrus taste very much like Green Crack. It burns incredibly fast, making it a great strain for rolling. 512 OG packs a hell of a punch for so feathery-light a variety. The effect comes on immediately as one of those heavylidded, slow-motion sensations for which top-flight cannabis is famous, but it keeps you feeling alert enough to take care of business—it’s great workday medicine. For patients with chronic pain requiring daytime relief, like arthritis, back spasms, PMS or bone injuries, it’s just the right choice.
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CONCENTRATES & edible reviews Fairfax OG Wax Love & Spirit Collective in North Hollywood has an enviable reputation as a place that puts patient needs first (don’t take our word for it—check out its online reviews), and in Fairfax OG, you find a wax that perfectly embodies that philosophy. Golden like honey while still bearing that telltale hue of cannabis green, it has just enough stickiness at room temperature for portions to gently hold to the dabber instead of flying off into space or refusing to leave the dabber when you’re trying to load it. Fairfax OG vaporizes almost instantly and, more importantly, fully, leaving behind exactly zero. The vapor, while harsh, is powerfully reminiscent of an Afghan Kush. The building nature of the effects are similarly Afghani, well up to the task of remedying pain related to AIDS/HIV, anxiety, arthritis, cancer and insomnia.
Leilani Chow A wax on the verge of being a budder, this 100-percent indica from Greenhouse Care Group in Riverside has a clean, skunky aroma so powerful there’s a pureness to it. Just the skunk and nothing but the skunk. That’s exactly what you want in a concentrate. Its budder-y consistency lends perfectly to dabbing, and we found a little goes a very long way—a dab no bigger than a craft bead is all it takes. Leilani Chow’s vapor is clean and gentle on the lungs, with the taste of citrus and almost ephemeral notes of passionflower. Patients with spinal injuries, muscle damage, MS or Crohn’s disease should take note: the euphoric, marrow-deep effects from this medicine are formidable enough to ease intense pain.
Venom OG Shatter Wax A dark and deadly glass from The Fire Station in downtown L.A., Venom OG is the color and consistency of molasses in January. Its true nature is revealed first in its smell. If you’re familiar with the peaty richness of the Poison OG/Rare Dankness cross Venom OG, you’ll spot it here immediately. We watched it do its thing in an open vape pen, and it heated just like a well-made shatter should—full-melt, liquefying just long enough to burst into columns of pure white vapor. The flavor is pure Venom—expansive and bittersweet, like smoked cherries. The body effects are heavy to the point of numbness, making it a good medicine for treating deep-seated pain such as related to AIDS, cancer, migraines and nerve damage.
IVTHC House Brownie When is a brownie not a brownie? When it looks like a cupcake. We here at CULTURE were pleasantly surprised when we were asked to review the IVTHC House Brownie from Inland Valley THC in Thousand Palms. First, its makers departed from the norm and have come up with something that looks like a chocolately cupcake instead of a ho-hum, (don’t be a) square brownie. Secondly, the results were tremendous. The bakers nailed this recipe and potency. We started with half a brownie and its effects starting creeping in a good hour after ingestion—then we polished off the rest. This is a perfect edible: just enough mood elevation, gallons of feel-good that makes all knots and pain go away (excellent for after a long day working the salt mines). There’s a warm glow, there’s mental clarity and the cupcake’s, er, brownie’s moist density will make baked-goods lovers swoon. What can brownie do for you?
Milf n’ Cookies Toffee Milf Chocolate Bar Let me first apologize to my lactose intolerant brothers and sisters—I can’t help but sing the praises of milk. It pairs up perfectly with cookies . . . and chocolate. But if you’re a patient, you might be more interested in this chocolate bar rather than anything else the Snickers aisle might have in store. Introducing the triple-strength Milf n’ Cookies Toffee Milf Chocolate Bar, which can be found at So Cal Collective in Santa Ana. Packed with 180 mgs of THC, this sweet edible is all about taking care of business: healing body and mind. The effects sweep in like a smooth velvet veil across body and head, about an hour after ingestion. And the sweet chocolate taste—decadent, rich and satisfying; tantalizing to mind and taste bud. Grab some milk on the way home tonight. 88 CULTURE • MAY 2013
Legal Disclaimer
Publishers of this publication are not making any representations with respect to the safety or legality of the use of medical cannabis concentrates. The reviews listed here are for general entertainment purposes only, and are intended for use only when medical cannabis is not a violation of state law. Please consume responsibly. Concentrates are legal and covered under Prop. 215 and SB 420, and they are considered a form of medical cannabis (H&S 11018). Without a doctor’s recommendation for medical cannabis, the possession ofVconcentrates California can I S I T U S inAT iRe abe daCfelony u l t (PC u r 1170). e.com
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Being Blunt
On the Screen Jay & Silent Bob’s Super Groovy Cartoon Movie screening May 5 at the Wiltern LG in Los Angeles.
Filmmaker and cannabis icon Kevin Smith dishes about why he converted to the cannabis cause by David Jenison
If Hollywood horror movies taught us anything, it’s don’t bully the wrong kid if don’t want him to slash everyone to bits at the high school reunion. Enter Kevin Smith, the indie filmmaker who got a seat at the Hollywood table but not on a Southwest airplane. The indie icon plans to retire the director’s chair in 2014, but he’s basically donned a hockey mask for his current slate of podcasts and live events. He humorously trashes Bruce Willis, Tim Burton, Jon Peters and others he worked with, and God help the person who admits too much, like the assistant who said Prince shops for his clothes in the boys department. His regular podcasts include “Hollywood Babble-On” and “Jay and Silent Bob Get Old,” and his classic Q&A events are often released on DVD. Many of his films are stoner classics, but if he gets his wish to make Clerks 3, it will actual be his first comedy movie as a regular cannabis user. Naturally, this interview begins with Smith’s late-age conversion.
You did not become a regular cannabis user until Seth Rogen got you into it at age 38. This begs the question, what references did you use for your stoner characters and dialogue? What a great question because, in looking back, the present me wants to call out twentysomething-year-old Kevin Smith as a f@#kin’ fraud. “You don’t know what you are talking about, man!” When I watch those movies now and hear the references to weed and stoner culture, it is clearly written by somebody who thought, “I don’t know what I’m talking about, but I’ve heard these words.” Now I would re-write it a bit different, and those flicks would spend a lot more time talking about weed. There would always be this moment when someone soliloquies like Linus talking about Jesus in A Charlie Brown Christmas, but in this instance, the soliloquy would be about weed and how good it is and how everyone should get off its back. Thank God I didn’t have that much education [on weed], or we would have spent a lot more time dealing with it back in the day. As far as references, a lot of it was just guesswork, and some was based on stuff [Jason] Mewes would say during his brief tenure as a stoner before moving on to heavier stuff. I based the character of Jay on who he was at age 16 or 17. That was Mewes as a crazy force of nature. There was a panel in this
old Dennis the Menace cartoon book where the neighbor Mr. Wilson saw Dennis walk by and said, “There goes that Mitchell kid. He’s like a sonic boom with dirt on it.” I loved that, and I always remembered it, so whenever I heard of Mewes, I was like, “There he goes. He’s a sonic boom with dirt on it.” I lost the thread of the question. What were we talking about again? What references you used for your stoner characters. Oh God, we got so far-flung from that. Basically, it was the Jason Mewes of my youth. I remember everything he would say. Your brain freezes things that it recognizes as currency, and you cannot spend it because you don’t know it yourself. Whenever I heard something, I was like, “I’m going to pack that away. This is inside information. This is one of those stoners, and he knows the terminology.” It was like having an insight into a culture that I wasn’t a part of, but it was definitely a young,
“Naturally, [cannabis] should not just be for people who are terminal cases. It should be for anybody.”
16-year-old Jason Mewes who fully informed all my marijuana references in those movies, even up to the ones later in life. By Clerks 2, I still wasn’t a stoner. Was I? No, I did Zack and Miri [Make a Porno] after that. Do you believe in the legitimacy of medical marijuana use? Oh, hands down, absolutely, in terms of the physical comfort, in terms of inducing appetite in those who don’t have. Set aside the physical medicinal, the psychological medicinal you cannot discount. What it can do for somebody, where it can take them, and I’m not just talking about, “Hey man, it’ll take you on a whacky high journey.” Think about the people for whom medical marijuana is usually recommended, and you are talking about extreme cases. I don’t think I’ve encountered anything in my life that has made me more okay with the notion that one day I’m going to pass from this world than marijuana. If someone is going through something medically traumatic or facing down their end, heavens, [give them] anything that is going to make the transition easy. Naturally, it should not just be for people who are terminal cases. It should be for anybody. It rearranges your mind. At least it did for me. For years, people fed me the same propaganda that you’ll smoke weed and sit there on the couch and just watch movies, but for me, it is a great organizer. MAY 2013 • CULTURE 93
How does cannabis make you more organized? If you think about the brain as a series of folders that you keep creating, weed for me is like a program that puts them all in order alphabetically and allows you to prioritize what is important. That is how I’ve been able to spin so many plates the last few years. My medicinal problem is that I have problems sleeping, and if that is doing it for somebody who has mild medicinal needs like myself, imagine what it can do for people who have absolute medicinal need. Instead of filling them with yet another synthetic narcotic put together chemically in a lab . . . I don’t want to get all stoner on ya, but there is a reason it just grows naturally. It doesn’t have to be produced. It’s not like, “It can only grow in a certain place.” I think nature is always trying to take care of us, and it provides at all given times. We have cannabinoid receptors in the brain, which don’t have many other uses. It points to, I believe, the idea that weed is something we are all naturally supposed to be ingesting. Of course, it has a cultural stigma, but that seems to be slowly sliding away. Tell me about the Q&A events you do around the country. I grew up listening to comics. My father worked at the post office, and he would bring home all these comedy records. He said he bought them from a friend who sold them out of his trunk at lunchtime, but I bet my old man took a few from the Colombia Records Club as they came through the mail. I love comedians, and I have too much respect for what they do to ever consider myself in the same league. Those cats have a real job, and I’m a carpetbagger. I just consider myself, “Oh, I made those movies and answer questions about them,” but the podcasts and live stuff enable me to be more like a comic. I am able to be more observational and tell more stories, like, “When I was working on the Prince documentary . . .” You really take it to celebrities in these events. Is the idea to let people see what happens be94 CULTURE • MAY APRIL2013 2013
hind the curtain in Hollywood? Yeah, totally. You should pull back the curtain. When I started doing the Q&As, I always felt I needed to answer questions the way I would have wanted them answered. I have been to a few panels and Q&As, and nobody wants to dish. For me, I would want to know details. I would want to know who is an asshole and who is not. Before going out on stage to do Q&A or “Hollywood Babble-On” or anything else, I say this dopey little prayer. Immediately you alienate a bunch of people when I say “prayer,” and you can find Jesus in this as much as you want, but this is my dopey little prayer. I say, “Lord, please just let me be honest. As long as I am honest, everything will be okay.” I have this philosophy that people are lied to and sold to and spun so often that all you have to do is throw a
little f@#kin’ candor out there and you pop for most everybody. They can recognize honesty, and then they give you a little credit for the next few things you say. It’s like, “Oh shit, he just told me his dick is small and Bruce Willis hates him, so I’ll believe the next 15 things coming out of his mouth.” For me, it was always pulling back the curtain a little bit and saying, “Look what I saw! Look what I learned!” In the Too Fat for 40 event, you are asked to describe working with Bruce Willis. How does that question turn into a 10 minutes story about getting stoned and taking a two-hour dump? You just got to be able to follow tangents. As long as you can land the plane . . . I saw Flight a couple weeks back, and that is kind of how I like to tell stories. Not on coke and drunk from the night
“For years, people fed me the same propaganda that you’ll smoke weed and sit there on the couch and just watch movies, but for me, it is a great organizer.”
before à la Denzel [Washington]’s character, but in the middle of telling the story, sometimes you got to flip the plane. As long as you can bring them in for a landing safely, the crowd will go anywhere. They will let you tell a story about taking shit even though they want to know what it’s like to work with Bruce Willis, and if I were a better storyteller, I would have summed up with how it is kind of the same thing. You had a lot of tangents off that one question. That was one of my proudest achievements as a storyteller. It was after the Southwest [Airlines] thing, and I had given myself over to living more fearlessly. Even though I looked like shit—in Too Fat for 40 I looked like dudes should be holding me down with ropes—I decided to go for it. I wanted to take one question and do two hours of stories that I had saved up. If you look at the stage, there is a park bench outside a fake Quick Stop and RST Video. On the floor by the park bench, I tapped down buzzwords for each story, like “Willis in Die Hard” and “Southwest” and “My Dad.” If I ever lost my place, I could saunter back there, see what stories I haven’t told yet and dive back into it. I just needed one question to begin with, and blessed f@#kin’ be, the first guy who gets up asks, “What is it like to work with Bruce Willis?” I was like, “Oh shit, I can go anywhere off this one.” It was funny because some cats got irritated when they watched it on TV and said, “It’s Q&A, and he only answered one question.” We didn’t have the heart to tell them that, after we ended the show, I came out and did another two hours of Q&A. You also have “Hollywood Babble-On” with Ralph Garman, which features segments like Movies That Will Suck. How do you pick which segments you do each week? Ralph is definitely the author of “Hollywood Babble-On,” and I’m the guy who sits there and reacts. The content changes every week based on the news, of course, but we hit all the favorite bits. I know he swapped out Creepy Clown V I S I T U S AT i R e a d C u l t u r e . c o m
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for doing the Green Lantern oath through a variety of different voices and characters. You can totally expect David Bowie, and I’ll be grabbing my own boobs and trying to suck them, as per usual. Seeing a live Kevin Smith boob suck must be better than just hearing it. It’s a good time. “Babble-On” lets me exercise a bunch of muscles I didn’t get to exercise while I was just making films, particularly the early films when it was all about being a filmmaker. “I don’t make movies, I make films, cinema.” There was precious little call for, “Pardon me while I grab my boobs and try to suck my own nipple.” The latest Hollywood news is that Hit Somebody will be a television miniseries and Clerks 3 will be your final movie. Is that still the plan? I’d been trying to get Hit Somebody done for two years as a flick when I realized, if I turn it into a miniseries, I can take my time telling the story I want to tell. That change opened up what I call my “last slot.” There is a self-imposed “I’m getting out of directing feature films,” but I need one last movie. For the last year, people kept asking, “If you are really going to retire, why are you doing it with a hockey movie? Why don’t you do it with Clerks 3 instead?” I thought, “That is a bit obvious, isn’t it?” For the very reason you ask, as an artist, I think I should not do Clerks 3. However, once I started talking about Hit Somebody as a miniseries, I immediately started seeing tweets. “Hey man, if that’s not your last film, then what about Clerks 3?” That is the wonderful thing about Twitter . . . you get instant feedback on all your decisions. Finally, I decided to let them know what I’d been thinking for a while. If this becomes this, that does free up my last slot to be Clerks 3, but the question mark is always going to be getting Jeff [Anderson] aboard. Do you think it will happen? I’m happy to do the movie. I love these characters, and I built my entire adult life—in the imaginary 98 CULTURE • MAY 2013
“I believe the idea that ‘cannabis’ is something we are all naturally supposed to be ingesting. Of course, it has a cultural stigma, but that seems to be slowly sliding away.” world, in the real world—on the backs of Dante and Randal. I have stories to tell, and I have one that closes it all up. Jeff Anderson, who plays Randal, absolutely has to signoff and jump onboard. He is Randal. It’s not like you can just recast him, and why would you want to? It is a journey that a few of us have taken together over the last 20 years. That would be me, Jason Mewes, Jeff Anderson, Brian O’Halloran, Scott Mosier and David Klein. If I can keep that core together, I have something special to begin with, but I couldn’t imagine doing it without Jeff. His whole thing is, “I didn’t want to do the second one, and then we did it, and I liked it a lot. But for the same reason I didn’t want to do the second one, and now at the crossroads of the third, why do we need to do it? Is there a need to tell the story?” I guess he is our Jiminy Cricket who keeps us honest. We are hopefully slowly cruising toward a 2014 start and finish, so I essentially have a year to convince him. The story is good. The story will convince
him once he reads it—hopefully, hopefully—but I have a backup plan . . . 2014 is the 20th anniversary of Clerks, and we’re going to mark it in some way. Hopefully it will be with a movie, but if not, it will be with something else. Tell me about the pushback you experienced from the film Red State. I was at the epicenter of two pockets of hate over the last few years. With Red State, I got to see a lot of gay hate by virtue of the fact that the [Fred] Phelps [clan] came out and protested a few screenings, and those cats do mean f@#kin’ business. You talk to their relatives
Too Fat to Fly
What’s the price of cheap airfare? Apparently, harassment and discrimination. Smith was removed from a flight after being judged that he was too obese to fly safely, though Southwest tried to justify this with contradictory (and privacy violating) statements. Smith dubbed them “The Greyhound of the Air” and has not flown with them since.
and ask, “They are kidding, right? They are just lawyers trying to make money?” They’re like, “No, no, no. They believe this shit.” The other pocket of hate I dealt with was size-ist. When I went through the “too fat to fly” thing with Southwest [Airlines], a lot of people came out of the woodwork like, “F@#k you, fatty, why don’t you just lose weight and shit?” It felt like the last publicly accepted bias or prejudice is for people of size, fat people. Thin people in this country can’t stand fat people, and fat people usually don’t like themselves that much, so it seems to be an acceptable hate. You can say shit about fat people in public, and it’s not considered a hate crime or an offense or anything like that. I have been in both pools, and I don’t understand when people turn negativity on total strangers . . . If people want to eat a whole pizza instead of one slice, that is their prerogative, so back the f@#k off. Why do you give a shit? I never understood why people get up in the grill of others. Sadly, I have seen it firsthand quite a bit lately, and that is why I live in California. Everybody here seems to be a bit more free with each other, and I like it. c www.facebook.com/YesThat KevinSmith seesmod.com/groovymovie V I S I T U S AT i R e a d C u l t u r e . c o m
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2007
1994
Smith creates SModcast, a podcast he came up with alongside creative partner/ co-host Scott Mosier. It features shows like “Hollywood Babble-On,”“Jay and Silent Bob Get Old” and “Fatman on Batman.”
Clerks wins the filmmakers trophy at the Sundance Film Festival. Not a bad way to start out your film career.
1997
Smith opens his own comic book/novelty store, Jay and Silent Bob’s Secret Stash, in Red Bank, New Jersey.
1999
Smith writes Guardian Devil (an eight-issue Daredevil story arc of Daredevil) for Marvel Comics and Green Arrow for DC Comics.
2008
While filming Zack and Miri Make a Porno, Smith gets a puff of inspiration from Seth Rogan: smoking cannabis while making movies increases the creative process. Genius!
2010
Southwest Airlines kicks Smith off a flight because of “safety concerns.” You know the rest.
2001
Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back brings the lovable stoners to Hollywood on a quest filled with doobie snacks, an orangutan and love for a gorgeous jewel thief.
2006
2012
Comic Book Men on AMC (yup, the home of Mad Men) lets you nerd out as you follow every fanboy’s dream of buying, selling and talking about mind-blowing pop culture artifacts.
Clerks II garners Smith the Audience Award at the 2006 Edinburgh International Film Festival.
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healthy living
By Lanny Swerdlow, RN, LNC
Telling Your
Doctor
One of the most perverse consequences of the legal grey area surrounding medical cannabis is the fear that many patients have in revealing their status as MMJ patients to their doctors. This is not good as a patient should feel safe and confident in speaking with their doctor about anything. If you cannot speak with your doctor frankly and openly, you are not going to get good medical care. Your doctor needs to know everything you do that affects your health if he or she is going to be able to make informed decisions on your healthcare. How to tell your doctor then depends on your level of confidence in your doctor. You might start by just asking him or her about their opinion on the use of cannabis. If the opinion is positive, then there should be no problem in revealing your use. If it isn’t, then you need to do a little educating. Providing them with authoritative information would be a good place to start as even doctors can succumb to decades of “reefer madness” brainwashing and cannot rationally look at cannabis with the reasoned scientific objectivity that was the foundation of their training. One of the best would be to provide information from medical organizations that they are most likely a member of such as the American Medical Association, which is the largest medical doctor organization in the country. This staid and conservative medical group has called “for further adequate and well-controlled studies of marijuana and related cannabinoids in patients who have serious conditions for which preclinical, anecdotal or controlled evidence suggests possible efficacy and the application of such results to the understanding and treatment of disease.” Although this is not a ringing endorsement, it does show that the largest medi102 CULTURE • MAY 2013
cal doctors’ organization in the country has recognized that there is enough evidence of its medical efficacy to change its long standing policy that cannabis should remain a Schedule 1 drug with no accepted medical usage. Another prestigious medical organization is the American College of Physicians, our nation’s second largest medical doctor organization. They endorsed a “review of marijuana’s status as a Schedule I controlled substance and reclassification into a more appropriate schedule, given the scientific evidence regarding marijuana’s safety and efficacy in some clinical conditions.” This will show your doctor that your
“It is important that your doctor understand your use of cannabis. If cannabis has improved your condition, it is imperative that your doctor know this.” contention that you have benefited from MMJ use is not so farfetched. Then you need to provide your doctor with a little research on the use of cannabis for your conditions. Whether you are using cannabis for pain, depression, insomnia, movement disorders or whatever, by going to google.com and typing in your condition followed by the words “medical marijuana” you should find many articles supporting the use of the plant that you can download and give to your doctor. It is important that your doctor understand your use of cannabis. If cannabis has improved your condition, it is imperative that
your doctor know this. Otherwise he will understandably assume that the treatment and medications he prescribed for you are the reasons for the improvement in your health. Seeing the improvement in your health, but not knowing about your cannabis use, he will continue to prescribe that treatment for other patients. This is good for the pharmaceutical companies that manufacture the medications prescribed by your doctor, but not good for patients who might find greater relief with fewer side effects by using a plant instead of or in combination with the prescription pharmaceuticals prescribed by their doctor. As jaded as a doctor might be to claims of cannabis’ efficacy, knowing that it has improved your health, they will be less likely to freak out when other patients report their use. If after all that, your doctor still will not accede to your MMJ use, perhaps you need to get another doctor. That could be difficult especially if you are a member of an HMO or a government health agency like the VA, but if you are to receive informed and effective medical care, your doctor needs to know. c Subscribe to Lanny Swerdlow’s free email newsletter by sending an email to lanny@marijuananews.org.
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GreenScene
Food Scraps as the Bold New Fertilizer for Your Garden {By NANCY POWELL}
Now that the spring sunshine has finally shown up, you’re probably thinking how you could best nurture the garden you’ve just planted, considering that ongoing drought and extreme weather conditions probably can probably put a bit of a damper in the fun. Enter food scraps, the unwanted leftovers—they do a plant’s body good. According to the Environmental Protection Agency, yard and food scraps comprise of 20 to 45 percent of all human-generated waste. In 2010 alone, Americans generated 34 million tons of food waste, and only three percent were saved from landfills for composting. This is bad for the environment on so many levels; more waste in landfills mean more methane (i.e., greenhouse gases) coming out. So rather than contribute to the heating of the planet, doesn’t it make sense to return this waste back to its source for renewal? One way of doing this is through composting, nature’s original method of recycling. And composting has a myriad benefits. Composting improves soil quality and structure. Healthy soil has a crumbly texture. When composted materials are added back to soil, it enhances the soil’s ability to retain more moisture and air, improving fertility and stimulating root development. Therein lies another benefit—the ability for soil to increase drought resistance. Compost also replaces commercial pesticides with a robust and truly organic fertilizer. This saves you money and reduces the amount of toxic substances circulating in the body. There is one other cause for celebration. The heat generated as anaerobic bacteria breaks down food and yard waste is one form of renewable energy, a resource now coveted by the onslaught of municipal composting programs nationwide. The East Bay Municipal Utility District in Oakland, California was the first city in the country to convert food scraps from local markets and restaurants into energy for its treatment plant. Just recently, Washington, D.C. has put its hat into the composting ring with ambitious plans to create “zero waste” by 2032. For the normal gardener, all it takes is backyard space and knowing which combinations of brown (paper, cardboard, dry yard waste like leaves, branches and sawdust for carbon), green (vegetable scraps for nitrogen), air and water to use in order to minimize the stink factor. The EPA has excellent resources to help gardeners develop their own compost piles properly. Check out the EPA’s tips on composting at epa. gov/recycle/composting.html. Take advantage of your leftovers and put it to good use. Your plants will thank you a bounty. c MAY 2013 • CULTURE 105
GET YOUR CLICK HERE
www.iReadCulture.com
cool stuff Suspicious Clothing T-Shirt With a line of consciously crafted casual clothing, Suspicious Clothing has you (literally) covered with high-tech fabrics that make its T-shirts highly breathable, wrinkle (and odor) resistant and able to protect you from UV rays. Top quality just got kicked up a notch. ($29-$34.99) www.suspiciousclothing.com
Luminair Tree Tents You like tree houses? Well we like Tree Tents! These things are Star Wars quality. Not for weekend warriors, these Tree Tents can be installed as a semi-permanent structures almost anywhere. These tents are lightweight, low impact, durable and really cool. (Prices start from $10,000.) www.luminair.co.uk
DabR If reliability, durability and versatility are the hallmarks of tomorrow’s portable vaporizers, than DabR has the market cornered today. Capable of vaporizing everything—herbs, flowers, oils, waxes—this pen vape is truly a four-in-one accessory that handles any patients’ needs under all circumstances. Flowers or extracts—DabR goes above and beyond. ($99.95) www.dabrusa.com
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cool stuff Money Bean Bag Anyone should be able to relax lyin‘ on this green. Talk about Benjamins! This lounge is supple and supportive, and has a comforting green grimace to brighten any day. ($99.95) www.urbanoutfitters.com
KannaBliss CouchLock Shots If you’ve got things to do, couch lock is the last thing a patient wants to tangle with. Thankfully, the CouchLock line of shots offer something more energetic. Providing energy, focus and relaxation—with a great-tasting mango extract base! Take your pick—HighVoltage, MagnaHigh or CouchLock— there’s something for any patients’ needs. ($26.94 sampler 6-pack) www.couchlock.com
Mutewatch Svart When Apple co-founder Steve Wozniak bought a Mutewatch, he called it “a masterpiece.” We couldn’t agree more. With its hidden touchscreen (yes, I said “touchscreen”) all of your clock, alarm and timer functions are just a swipe away. And it’s got a vibrate alert! ($299) mutewatch.com
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By Aunt Sandy
Menu:
Soupe a l’Oignon (French Onion Soup) w/Infused Croutons Spring Green Salad w/Italian Dressing Apple Crisp Sweet Tea
Whether spring brings us sunshine or snow, it’s always a good time to celebrate the season that reminds us of nature’s fabulous powers of renewal and rebirth. To ease us away from winter’s grip, we’ve come up with this light, refreshing menu. Season’s greetings.
Sandy Moriarty is the author of Aunt’ Sandy’s Medical Marijuana Cookbook: Comfort Food for Body & Mind and a Professor of Culinary Arts at Oaksterdam University. She is also the co-founder of Oaksterdam’s Bakery. 112 CULTURE • MAY 2013
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Soupe a l’Oignon (French Onion Soup) Serves eight 1 1/2 lbs. (about 5 cups) yellow onion, thinly sliced 3 tablespoons Canna Butter* 1 tablespoon Cannabis Infused Oil** 1 teaspoon salt 1/4 teaspoon sugar 3 tablespoons flour 2 quarts of boiling brown stock (or canned beef bouillon) 1/2 cup dry white wine, cognac or dry sherry Salt and pepper to taste Cook onions slowly over low hear in a heavy bottom, 4-quart covered saucepan with the Butter and Oil for 15 minutes. Uncover, raise heat to medium and stir in salt and sugar (it helps the onions to brown). Cook for 45 minutes, stirring frequently, until onions have turned an even, deep golden brown. Sprinkle in the flour and stir for three minutes. Turn off the heat and blend in the boiling stock (or bouillon). Add the wine, and season to taste with salt and pepper. Simmer partially covered for 45 minutes. Set aside uncovered until ready to serve. Then reheat to simmer. Garnish with Infused Croutons.
Infused Croutons 1 French baguette 1/2 cup Canna Butter* Garlic salt Slice the baguette into cubes, enough to make about three cups. In a skillet, melt the Butter. Toss in the bread cubes and toast until they are golden brown. Drain on paper towels. Season with garlic salt.
Spring Green Salad Serves eight Iceberg lettuce Red leaf lettuce Spinach Romaine Endive Watercress, etc. Wash a selected choice of greens for your salad and dry well. Break into pieces and put it into a large salad bowl. Garnish your salad with your choice of cherry tomatoes, olives, beets, carrots, cucumber, fennel slices, celery, red or yellow peppers, onions, nuts, pickles, capers, etc. Serve with Infused Croutons and Italian Dressing.
Italian Dressing
4 tablespoons wine vinegar 1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon dry mustard 12 tablespoon Cannabis Infused Oil** 2 pinches of pepper 1/2 tablespoon minced parsley 1/2 tablespoon minced chives 1/2 tablespoon minced tarragon 1/2 tablespoon minced basil
Pour all of the ingredients together in a jar. Replace the screw top on the jar and shake vigorously for 30 seconds to blend thoroughly. MAY 2013 • CULTURE 113
Apple Crisp Serves SIX 4 cups sliced tart apples 2 tablespoon lemon juice 1/2 cup all-purpose flour 1/2 cup brown sugar 1/4 cup Canna Butter* 1/2 tablespoon salt 1 tablespoon cinnamon Vanilla ice cream (optional)
Bake in an ovenproof dish that you can serve at the table. Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Pare, core and slice apples into a 9-inch pie pan or dish and add lemon juice. Work the flour, brown sugar, Butter, salt and cinnamon with a pastry blender or with your finger tips. The mixture must be worked so that it does not become oily. Spread these crumbly ingredients over the apples. Bake for 30 minutes. Serve hot or cold and garnish with a scoop of vanilla ice cream if desired.
Sweet Tea 4 bags of your favorite tea 1 quart of water 1/4 cup Cannabis Infused Simple Syrup*** Ice cubes Spring of mint, lemon wedge, etc. as garnish
Combine water and your favorite tea bags in a glass jar. Cover and refrigerate overnight. Remove the tea bags and add Syrup. Serve over ice cubes. Garnish with mint, a lemon wedge . . . or Infused Rum.
Cannabis Infused Oil** 1 cup cooking oil 1 1/4 ounces low to average quality dried leaf cannabis or 3/4 ounce average dried bud Place cannabis in a slow cooker. Add oil. If necessary, add a little extra oil in order to just cover the cannabis. Cook on low for six to eight hours, stirring often. Strain through cheesecloth to remove plant material. For further purity, strain through a coffee filter. Store in the refrigerator for up to three months.
Canna Butter* 1 cup unsalted butter 1 ounce low to average quality dried leaf marijuana or 1/2 ounce average dried bud 4 cups water Bring water and butter to boil in a small pot, lower heat to simmer. Simmer gently for about 1 1/2 hours. Mash and stir frequently to extract all THC from the plant material. After cooking, use cheesecloth to strain the butter/water mixture. Pour about 2 cups clean boiling water over the leaves in the strainer to extract every last drop of butter. Squeeze plant material well to remove as much liquid as possible. Chill the butter/water mixture in the refrigerator until the butter has solidified (1 to 2 hours). Separate butter from water and keep butter in the refrigerator (or freezer for longer storage) until needed. 114 CULTURE • MAY 2013
Cannabis Infused Simple Syrup*** 1/2 oz. cannabis buds 1 cup sugar 1 cup water In a saucepan, sauté the buds in sugar and water over medium heat for 20 minutes. Strain the buds. Pour the remaining green-colored syrup into a glass container. Let it cool and refrigerate.
Legal Disclaimer
Publishers of this publication are not making any representations with respect to the safety or legality of the use of medical marijuana. The recipes listed here are for general entertainment purposes only, and are intended for use only where medical marijuana is not a violation of state law. Edibles can vary in potency while a consumers’ weight, metabolism and eating habits may affect effectiveness and safety. Ingredient management is important when cooking with cannabis for proper dosage. Please consume responsibly and check with your doctor before consumption to make sure that it is safe to do so. V I S I T U S AT i R e a d C u l t u r e . c o m
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Shooting Gallery
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Coachella Valley Music & Arts Festival (Photos by Kristopher Christensen)
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Shooting Gallery
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The Musink Tattoo Convention and Music Festival (Photos by Kristopher Christensen)
Moe in concert (Photos by Kristopher Christensen)
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Shooting Gallery
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Cheech & Chong’s Animated Movie premier (Photos by Steve Baker)
CULTURE Girls and 420 parties
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(Photos by CULTURE staff)
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Shooting Gallery
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www.iReadCulture.com
Desert Daze (Photos by Gabriela Mungarro)
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She & Him Volume 3 Merge Records Hipster queen Zooey Deschanel and neo-folkster/alt-country genius M. Ward have returned with their ensemble She & Him, to bring us their third installment of original and gorgeous material. Volume 3, much like their previous two albums, is a wonderful return to the glory days of classic, large-sounding pop records, like the Beach Boys’ Pet Sounds or any album that Phil Spector produced. Volume 3 also shows Ward and Deschanel evolving their sound to incorporate more contemporary influences and styles. The enveloping sonicsoundscapes of soaring string arrangements and swirling background vocals are still intact, along with vintage-toned guitars and basses. The record seems to be less of a tribute to their influences than previous efforts, and more of a distinctive vision for the duo that draws on classic stylings while creating something wholly unique. Volume 3 shows continued growth from She & Him and proves that the group is more than just a pair of famous names, but instead a songwriting and production duo of which to be in awe. (Simon Weedn)
Memoirs of Dennis Peron: How a Gay Hippy Outlaw Legalized Marijuana in Response to the AIDS Crisis By Dennis Peron & John Entwistle, Jr. Medical Use Publishing House Upon first impression, Dennis Peron comes off like a disrespected pothead, complaining about the way life has (mis)treated him at the start of his biography, Memoirs of Dennis Peron: How a Gay Hippy Outlaw Legalized Marijuana in Response to the AIDS Crisis. However, when this wide-ranging book eventually gets to the section where Peron fights for passage of California’s Proposition 215, the Compassionate Use Act of 1996, where marijuana is “legalized” as medicine— particularly to help heal the pain and suffering caused by the AIDS epidemic in Peron’s San Francisco hometown—his image is subtly transformed from that of a loser, into a true leader. This book is part biography, part marijuana legalization manifesto and Peron (with John Entwistle’s editorial help) sometimes cannot decide if he’s writing a political opinion piece or a life story. However, it’s difficult to blame Peron for his tendency to digress because political causes are his life story, so the book would be incomplete without these various activist elements. With these editing flaws aside though, this book nevertheless offers an essential historical snapshot of one peaceful warrior in America’s lengthy war on cannabis. (Dan MacIntosh)
Cloud Atlas Warner Bros. Siblings Lana and Andy Wachowski (The Matrix Trilogy) return, along with Tom Tykwer (The International, Run Lola Run), to direct what was thought to be an un-makeable film adaptation of bestselling novel Cloud Atlas. Along with an exquisite cast of stars including Tom Hanks, Halle Berry, Susan Sarandon and Hugh Grant, who take on a variety of rolls, the Wachowskis and Tykwer majestically weave together six unique stories that stretch across the fabric of time to show how the actions of an individual can ripple out to affect the actions of those in the future. In what can be best described as a period-piece meets folk-tale meets sci-fi action movie, the directors manage to create a film that is both lucid and well thought out. The only thing that can take a bit of getting used to is the narrative style, which jumps between periods and stories from time to time, without warning. However, for the viewer who can adjust to the unique storytelling, the reward is a gorgeous and epic tale, which not only dazzles the eyes, but also presents an interesting philosophy on human existence. For these reasons, Cloud Atlas is definitely not one to miss. (Simon Weedn) 126 CULTURE • MAY 2013
The Savoring of the Ooga
entertainment reviews “Gary Baseman: The Door Is Always Open” Skirball Cultural Center is usually the place to go for exhibitions about historical or cultural patterns, theory, events or general cultural-interest stories and exhibitions. But this summer its are stepping up its (contemporary art) A-game, and has a new exhibition that takes you inside the mind and life of alternative art icon Gary Baseman. This exhibition will serve as the first major museum survey of his career, and Baseman is determined to go above and beyond the norm—of course. The show’s title, “The Door Is Always Open,” is inspired by Baseman’s late father’s reminder that he is always welcome in the family home—and Baseman plays on that loving theme by welcoming you into his, literally. Almost every piece of furniture, decor, memento, toy and household object from Baseman’s childhood and current homes have been carted up the hill to Skirball and turned into an imaginative installation that not only gives the art on display the most profound of contexts but also does the same for the artist’s whole life. IF YOU GO What: “Gary Baseman: The Door Is Always Open.” When/Where: Open now through Aug. 18 at Skirball Cultural Center, 2701 N. Sepulveda Blvd., Los Angeles. Info: Admission is $10 (Free on Thursdays). Go to www.skirball. org.
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liner notes Don’t always believe what you read—well, at least not if it’s in TMZ. Over St. Patrick’s Day weekend, the rapper Lil Wayne was hospitalized after having seizures. What followed were hours of misreporting and misunderstandings. Wayne’s family and friends kept saying that he was fine; MACK MAINE from Young Money/Cash Money tweeted that he was “alive and well” and that fans should not “believe the nonsense about comas and tubes to breathe.” Maine was responding to reports from TMZ saying that Wayne was being given his last rites and that his family was saying “their goodbyes.” They later deleted this statement, but continued to poke at the rapper in his state of medical possible-emergency. Wayne had released a tweet around 9:30pm saying that he was fine. TMZ said that Wayne was asleep during this time and could not, therefore, have been the tweet’s originator. The conspiracy theories boiled off into simple backtracking, as TMZ had to give sensationalist ground to the mounting facts. This is not surprising from these antijournalists. I’m not saying that TMZ is stupid; I’m saying that they know their readers are. JAY-Z is set to produce the soundtrack for Baz Luhrmann’s upcoming film, The Great Gatsby. This jazz-age update was set to release near Christmas 2012, but was pushed back to summer for probablynot-that-great reasons. Nevertheless, the director, famous for such eclectic and memorable soundtracks as the one for Moulin Rouge, said that he wanted to “elicit from [his] audience the same level of excitement and pop cultural immediacy toward the world that Fitzgerald did for his audience.” Now set-pieces and movie stars aside, Luhrmann thought the best way to do this was to involve current musical tastes: “[I]n our age,” he said, “the energy of jazz is caught in the energy of hip-hop.” The energy of jazz is also caught in, well, you know, jazz. Jay-Z doesn’t seem to mind the update, though. He thinks the themes of the film fit very well with those of modern hip-hop. “The Great Gatsby,” he said “is that classic American story of one’s introduction to extravagance, decadence and illusion.” Well put, Jay-Z’s publicist, well put.
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By Kevin Longrie
BILLIE JOE ARMSTRONG, the first man to walk on the pop-punk moon, is reportedly writing songs for a rock adaptation of Shakespeare’s Much Ado About Nothing. The Green Day veteran is collaborating on a Yale Repertory Theater production of the play titled These Paper Bullets. It seems that these days, anyone and everyone is willing to throw their hat into the ring to adapt some of Shakespeare’s work, often with little of the original left to be found. This is where most people would expect me to stand on the edge of a cliff and cry “blasphemy” out over the valley. But these manifold adaptations, no matter how good or bad, do little to besmirch the reputation of the Bard. Those who want his work seek them out, and those who vaguely remember reading them in high school adapt them into rock operas. Really, just like our modern day Billie, old Bill Shakespeare borrowed from his many influences while writing his plays, sonnets and punk anthems.
(That’s right, Shakespeare wrote punk anthems; who do you think the “Dark Lady” was?) Little else is known about the adaptation, except that it’ll be set in London and released next year. Let’s hope Armstrong keeps the Elizabethan English. Tagline: “I hope thou hadst the time of thine life.” LADY GAGA hurt herself. We know this. She had surgery. We know this. But Gaga is not on the typical road to recovery. Did you really think that she’d let the act drop for a bit in order to ensure a healthy, speedy recovery? Of course not. She instead paid for a custom-made gold-plated wheelchair to be erected for her personal use. Its leather padding and sun-shade remind one of some kind of Hells Angels baby carriage. Truth be told, it’s not the most beautiful or most original Gaga flourish, but at least she won’t have to be carried around by a Sumo wrestler or something. Come to think of it, that’s a way better idea. c
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let’s do this Our picks for the coolest things to do around town AT&T Mobile App Hackathon, May 4 Hackers unite! Compete to create a new, life-changing app for smartphones everywhere. Investors are on standby; this could be chance of a lifetime. Los Angeles City College, Los Angeles mobileappla.eventbrite.com
2013 Skateboarding Hall of Fame and Icons Award Ceremony, May 9 Woody Woodward, Tom Sims, Alan “Ollie” Gelfand, Devo and more are being honored and inducted as skateboarding’s awesomest. Meet the best, eat dinner with them and see them get immortalized. Sheraton Park Hotel, Anaheim skateboardinghalloffame.eventbrite.com
New Filmmakers Association Film Screening, May 11 We swear this isn’t a bunch of depressing, nonsensical black-and-white indie films. These are talented newcomers bringing something you won’t see anywhere else. Probably. AT&T Center, Los Angeles www.newfilmmakers.com
Queen’s Day at Hilton Anaheim, May 12 It’s a delicious brunch at a semi-fancy hotel. Your mother will go crazy for that kind of thing. Just make sure she doesn’t pay the bill, cheapskate. The Hilton, Anaheim www.hiltonanaheimhotel.com
Highway 91 Black Jack Run, May 15 Cars, bikes and burgers. Oh, and there will be a high stakes poker game. You game? Nick’s Burgers, Fullerton socalcarculture.com
OC Greek Fest, May 17 Oppa! If all you know about Greek culture is what you saw in My Big Fat Greek Wedding, maybe you need a reality check. Windex does not solve everything. Greek Orthodox Church, Anaheim ocgreekfest.com
Duck-A-Thon, May 17-19
Rubber ducky, you’re the one! Make your own rubber ducky,
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bounce around in a giant duck house, race your ducky in the ocean, win prizes and descend into duck-related madness. Good times. Huntington Beach Pier, Huntington Beach www.duckathon.org
International Natural Hair Meet Up Day, May 18 Embrace your hair, whether it is curly, kinky, crazy or whatever. Join with like minded women and celebrate everything good about the way you work your hair. Renaissance Airport Hotel, Los Angeles nmhmd.com
2nd Annual Gaslamp Music & Art Festival, May 25 While this may be a younger music festival it is one that has already garnered a fantastic reputation for showing off great new live tunes at a stellar location. Forget the heat and insanity of Coachella, check out this instead. Gaslamp Quarter, San Diego www.gaslamp.org
Taste of Brews, May 25 You get to drink a wide variety of delicious beers. I don’t know how else to sell this to you if that didn’t work. White Park, Riverside www.tasteofbrews.com
Fleetwood Mac Live, May 28 You could go your own way on this, but I don’t want to know why you wouldn’t be for this in a landslide. If you got any of that, you need to be here. Honda Center, Anaheim www.hondacenter.com
Darren Criss Live, May 30 I’m not adding this to fill a quota, but watching a ridiculously talented pretty boy who happens to play a popular gay character on a coincidentally LGBT-centric TV show in a very gay-friendly part of SoCal should give you an idea of what you’re in for. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Go, Starkid! House of Blues, West Hollywood www.houseofblues.com
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CULTURE Quiz
HEAD COUNT
?
Time to rev up your brain cells, folks. Take this official CULTURE quiz and test yourself to see how much you know about cannabis. For each question you answer correctly, give yourself 5 points.
Does California Lt. Governor Gavin Newsom support legalizing cannabis?
cannabis be effective to 3 Can treat Crohn’s disease? many MMJ initiatives 4 How will Los Angeles voters be
asked to consider this month?
or false: Rapper 2 age did filmmaker 5 True Chainz was found guilty of 2 AtKevinwhatSmith start using cancannabis charges last month? nabis to spur creative thinking?
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ANSWERS
?
1. Yes. 2. 38. 3. Yes. 4. 3. 5. False. He was found not guilty.
1
?
Now Rate Yourself: 5 points: A few classes at Oaksterdam University won’t even help you. 10 points: Are you even a patient? 15 points: Keep medicating. 20 points: Impressive. Almost ready for the big leagues. 25 points: What do you want—a prize?
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Chuck Shepherd
News of the
Weird LEAD STORY— UNDOCUMENTED LIVING
; Undocumented immigrant Jose Munoz, 25, believed himself an ideal candidate for President Obama’s 2012 safe-harbor initiative for illegal-entry children, in that he had been brought to the U.S. by his undocumented parents before age 16, had no criminal record and had graduated from high school (with honors, even). Since then, however, he had remained at home in Sheboygan, Wis., assisting his family, doing odd jobs and, admittedly, just playing video games and “vegging.” Living “in the shadows,” he found it almost impossible to prove the final legal criterion: that he had lived continuously in the U.S. since graduation (using government records, payroll sheets, utility bills, etc.). After initial failures to convince immigration officials, reported the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel in March, Munoz’s lawyer succeeded—by submitting Munoz’s Xbox Live records, documenting that his computer’s Wisconsin location had been accessing video games, day after day, for years.
GOVERNMENT IN ACTION!
; Among the lingering costs of U.S. wars are disability payments and compensation to veterans’ families, which can continue decades after hostilities end. An Associated Press analysis of federal payment records, released in March, even found two current recipients of Civil War benefits. Vietnam war payments are still about $22 billion a year, World War II, $5 billion, World War I, $20 million, and the 1898 SpanishAmerican war, about $1,700. 134 CULTURE • MAY 2013
; Each year, Oklahoma is among the states to receive $150,000 federal grants to operate small, isolated airfields (for Oklahoma, one in the southern part of the state is so seldom used that it is primarily a restroom stop for passing pilots). The payments are from a 13-year- old congressional fund for about 80 similar airfields (no traffic, no planes kept on site), described by a February Washington Post investigation as “ATM(s) shaped like (airports).” Congress no longer even requires that the annual grants be spent on the actual airports drawing the grants.
; During the massive February Southern California manhunt for former Los Angeles cop Christopher Dorner, nervous-triggered LAPD officers riddled an SUV with bullets after mistakenly believing Dorner was inside. Instead there were two women, on their early-morning job as newspaper carriers, and LAPD Chief Charlie Beck famously promised them a new truck and arranged with a local dealership for a 2013 Ford F-150 ($32,560). However, the deal fell through in March when the women discovered that Beck’s “free” truck was hardly free. Rather, it would be taxable as a “donation,” reported on IRS Form 1099, perhaps costing them thousands of dollars.
GREAT ART!
; Sculptor Richard Jackson introduced “Bad Dog” as part of his “Ain’t Painting a Pain” installation at California’s Orange County Museum in February. Outside, to coax visitors in, Jackson’s “Bad Dog’s” hind leg was cocked, with gallons of yellow paint being pumped onto the building. “We’ll see how long it lasts,” he told the
Los Angeles Times, “but you never know how people will react.” “Sometimes, people feel they should protect their children from such things, then the kids go home and watch South Park.” ; Australian dilettante David Walsh’s 2-year-old Museum of Old and New Art in Hobart is acquiring a reputation for irreverence. Among the exhibits is Greg Taylor’s “My Beautiful Chair,” which invites a visitor to lie next to a lethal injection chair and experience a countdown, mimicking the time it takes for execution drugs to kill (and then flashing “You Are Dead”). Also, at 2 p.m. each day, a “fresh fecal masterpiece” is created by artist Wim Delvoye, in which a meal from the museum’s restaurant is placed into a transparent grinder that creates slush, turns it brown, and adds an overpowering defecation-like smell. The resulting “masterpiece” is channeled into (also transparent) vats. ; Career-Ending Jobs for Runway Models: British “design engineer” Jess Eaton introduced her second “high-fashion” collection in December at London’s White Gallery, this time consisting of supposedly elegant bridal wear made in part with roadkill, cat and alpaca fur, seagull wings and human bones.
DEMOCRACY IN ACTION
; U.S. political consultants may recommend to their candidates gestures such as wearing an American flag lapel pin. In India, the advice includes creating the proper suggestive name for the candidate on the official ballot. Hence, among those running for office this year (according to a February Hindustan Times report): Frankenstein Momin, Hamletson Dohling, Boldness Nongum and Bombersing Hynniewta, and several Sangmas (related or not): Billykid Sangma, Mafiara Sangma, Rightious Sangma and Winnerson Sangma. More confusing were Hilarius Dkhar and Hilarius Pohchen and especially Adolf Lu Hitler Marak.
PERSPECTIVE
; Some Third-Worlders eat dirt because they are mentally ill or
have no meaningful food. However, diners at Tokyo’s upscale Ne Quittez Pas eat it because it is a trendy dish prepared by prominent chef Toshio Tanabe. Among his courses are soil soup served with a flake of dirty truffle, soil sorbet and the “soil surprise” (a dirtcovered potato ball). (Spoiler alert: It has a truffle center.) Tanabe lightly precooks his dirt and runs it through a sieve to eliminate the crunchiness.
POLICE REPORTS
; In some jurisdictions, a driver can be presumed impaired with a blood alcohol reading as low as .07 (and suggestively impaired at a reading below that), but according to a WMAQ-TV investigation in February, some suburban Chicago police forces allow officers to work with their own personal readings as high as .05. (While officers may be barred from driving at that level, they may not, by police union contract, face any discipline if they show up for work with a reading that high.) ; From the Blotter: (1) Arlington County, Va., police reported in February that a resident of Carlin Springs Road told officers that someone entered her home and stole chicken from her simmering crock pot—but only the chicken, leaving the vegetables as they were. The report noted that they had no suspects. (2) Prison guard Alfredo Malespini III, 31, faces several charges in Bradford, Pa., resulting from a marital dispute in March, when, presumably to make a point, he tried to remove his wedding ring by shooting it off. (The ring remained in place; his finger was mangled.)
FETISHES ON PARADE
; Serving Pediphiles: In March, a 19-year-old New York University student described to the New York Post her one-night experience last year as a foot-fetish prostitute at a spa in which men paid a $100 entrance fee plus $20 for each 10 minutes of fondling and kissing young women’s feet. She said the men wore business suits, which they kept on the whole time, and that the dressed-up V I S I T U S AT i R e a d C u l t u r e . c o m
women had to first pass a strict foot examination by the “pimp,” seeking candidates with the desired “high arches and small feet.” She guessed that more than two dozen men patronized the spa during her shift and that she earned $200, including tips.
READERS’ CHOICE
; In March, Jose Martinez pocketed an $8,000 settlement with California’s Disneyland after he was stranded on a broken It’s a Small World ride for a half-hour in 2009. Because Martinez is disabled, he could not easily be rescued and was forced, he said, to listen to the “It’s a Small World” song on an endless loop until help arrived. (2) A woman and her son doing yard work at their home in Texarkana, Texas, in March “cleverly” dealt with a menacing snake by dousing it with gasoline and setting it afire, but of course it slithered away—under brush next to their house. Moments later, according to an Associated Press dispatch, the home caught fire and burned down, and their neighbor’s house was heavily damaged.
SNAIL MAIL: THERE’S AN APP FOR THAT
; Wait . . . What? A startup company in Austin, Texas, also serving San Francisco, promises to take its customers’ incoming U.S. mail three times a week, photograph it and deliver it back to the customers via mobile phone app, for $4.99 a month. The company, Outbox, provides some value-added services, removing the customer from junk-mail lists and paying bills. Still, Outbox’s unorthodox business model assumes that a growing number of people absolutely hate opening, filing or discarding pieces of paper. Co-founder Will Davis told CNN in February that at least he does not fear competition: “No one is crazy enough to do what we’re doing.”
OOPS!
; College basketball player Shanteona Keys makes free throws at a 78 percent rate for her career, but on Feb. 16, she weakly
shanked one of those 15-foot shots, causing it to thud to the floor about eight feet short of the rim—the worst collegiate freethrow attempt of all time, according to several sports commentators who viewed the video. Keys explained to Deadspin.com that she always brings the ball close to her face when she shoots, “and my fingernail got caught on my nose, so I couldn’t follow through correctly.” Her Georgia College (Milledgeville, Ga.) team lost to rival Columbus State, 70-60. ; Research Hurts: Between 2002 and 2010, according to the March BJU International (formerly British Journal of Urology), an estimated 17,600 patients came to U.S. hospital emergency rooms reporting genital injuries from trouser zippers (presumably by accident, but researchers took no position on that). Seven authors (six from University of California, San Francisco) took credit for the report, funded by a National Institutes of Health grant, and found that “zip” wounds were only about one-fifth of emergency penile injuries.
FAMILY VALUES
; Rachel Hope and Parker Williams, both apparently intelligent and attractive, decided to procreate and fully raise a child together—even though neither has romantic intentions toward the other. Their relationship is likened to a business one, according to a February New York Times profile, in which they do their respective biological duties, separately, and then each basically outsources half the subsequent child-rearing to the other. Said another parent in a similar relationship: “When you think about the concept of the village, and how the village was part of child-rearing for so many cultures . . . it makes total sense.” ; Robert Burton, 34, got a 15year prison sentence in February for forcing women into prostitution, with evidence including a police report quoting Burton’s 7-year-old son, who was in the car with Burton and two women when Miami police stopped them. The kid had earnestly identified the women: “Those are my daddy’s hoes.” MAY 2013 • CULTURE 135
THE CONTINUING CRISIS
; Professor Peter Froehlich, who teaches computer science classes at the highly competitive Johns Hopkins University, contractually grades “on a curve,” automatically marking the highest grade an A, with other grades trailing based on their proximity to the class’s best. One clever student tried to organize the entire class for December’s final exam, to persuade everyone to do no work at all—thus rendering the “highest” grade a zero, meaning an A for everyone. (Of course, if a single student broke ranks, everyone except that student would receive an absolute zero.) Fortunately for the students, according to InsideHigherEd.com, the class held together, and a shocked professor Froehlich nonetheless honored his contract, giving everyone an A (but subsequently closing the loophole). ; Thieves broke into the home of Earlie Johnson in Muskegon, Mich., in February and made off
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with several flat-screen TVs, but what really irked him was that they also stole his entire DVD pornography collection, consisting, he said, of the films of every African-American porn star since the 1970s. (“I’m not no scum bag guy, pervert, or nothing like that,” he told WZZM-TV. “I just thought it was cool to own my own porn collection. It keeps my relationship (with his fiancé) fresh and tight.”) As soon as the news of Johnson’s misfortune spread, several adult video companies donated DVDs to help restore the collection. ; Sex Is Dangerous: (1) Officers from the Zimbabwe Parks and Wildlife Management Authority reported in March that a lion had attacked a couple having sex in the bush, killing the woman and sending the man dashing down a road wearing nothing but his condom (which reduced his chances of receiving help from motorists). (2) Near Daytona Beach, Fla., in February, Ms. Asia Walker, 30, driving her boyfriend around, could not resist his amorous advances and soon lost control of the car.
It left the road and plowed completely through a vacant house. She was briefly hospitalized, but her boyfriend was not hurt.
FINE POINTS OF THE LAW
; Even though the British government refused to grant trademark protection to the Italian maker of “Jesus Jeans” because it would be “morally offensive to the public,” the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office had no such qualms and approved the application in 2007. Since then, according to a February Wall Street Journal story, the company has prevented a dozen other companies from using such clothing names as “Jesus First,” “Sweet Jesus,” “Jesus Couture” and, most recently, “Jesus Surfed.”
PEOPLE DIFFERENT FROM US
; A persevering Brooklyn, N.Y., high school teacher, Ronald Grassel, finally relented and submitted himself to a psychiatric evaluation that had originally been ordered
in 1997 after he angrily and overenthusiastically dumped teachers’ union literature in his principal’s office. Grassel had refused the exam and been benched, and for 14 years was neither fired nor paid while he filed a series of unsuccessful legal actions to overturn the decision. According to a March New York Post report, when he finally submitted to an exam in 2011, he was declared fit (his world-class obstinacy apparently not counting against him) and in September 2012 was back on the job.
PERSPECTIVE
; Humans’ belief that fragrances improve their allure can seemingly never be overestimated. Dutch-based artists Lernert Engelberts and Sander Plug told The New York Times in March that they recently created a concoction to call attention to our neediness for artificial scent. Noting the deluge of new industry creations in 2012, Engelberts explained, “Our point is, why do you need nearly 1,400 new scents in one year?” The pair created Everything, which they claim contains a bit of every one
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of the year’s fragrances they were able to obtain (including Fame by Lady Gaga and Justin Bieber’s Girlfriend), dumped into one bottle and left to marinate—and they offered it for sale for the equivalent of about $39,000.
LEAST COMPETENT CRIMINALS
; Not Ready for Prime Time: (1) Paul Masters, 47, was charged with a roof-entry burglary of a Roses department store in Lexington, Ky., in March. Those burglaries are common, but almost always nighttime jobs, when no one else is on the premises. Masters, though, dropped in just after lunchtime. After police swarmed the store, Masters eventually fell through a drop ceiling and was arrested. (2) Jarad Carr, 37, was arrested in Chippewa County, Wis., in March after he persisted in demanding a refund for the computer printer he said he had bought at a Wal-Mart (though he lacked a receipt). While examining the printer, the WalMart employee noticed a sheet of paper still inside—showing two counterfeit $100 bills—and called police, who arrived while Carr was still haggling for a refund.
READERS CHOICE
; (1) A judge in Racine, Wis., granted bail for Tyree Carter, 20, for his March arrest for “lewd and lascivious conduct” in the Racine Public Library, but among the conditions of his release was that, until trial, Carter “stay out of all the libraries on the face of the Earth.” (2) In a ruling that lasted less than a week, England’s Mid Devon District Council had decreed in March that henceforth, no street name could contain an apostrophe, e.g., St. George’s would be St. Georges. Outraged punctuationists swung into action, causing the council to quickly reverse itself.
LEAD STORY— SMARTY PANTS
; The Precocious Tots of Finland: A University of Kansas professor and two co-authors, in research in a forthcoming issue of the Journal of Finance, found that children age 10 and under substantially outperformed their parents in earnings from stock trading in the few days
before and after rumors swirled on possible corporate mergers. A likely explanation, they said, is that the parents or guardians were buying and selling for their children’s accounts using illegal insider information that they were cautious about using in their personal accounts, which would more easily arouse suspicion. While the parents’ accounts had nice returns, the kids’ accounts (including those held by the very recently born) were almost 50 percent more profitable. (The study, reported by NPR in April, covered 15 years of trades in Finland, chosen because that country collects age data that the U.S. and other countries do not.)
THE ENTREPRENEURIAL SPIRIT!
; Delicate Marketing Required: (1) A fluoride-free chocolate toothpaste “proven” to strengthen teeth and regenerate enamel is now on sale in limited markets in the U.S. Theodent (active ingredient: “rennou”) is also available in mint flavor, said its New Orleansbased inventor, Dr. Tetsuo Nakamoto. (2) One of the 12 Canadian foods chosen to accompany the country’s International Space Station astronaut in December is the limited-issue dry cereal especially noted for its fiber, organic buckwheat and various nontraditional ingredients. “Holy Crap” cereal is available throughout Canada and in 19 other countries.
fatal in countries with marginal hygiene, scientists at the U.K. government’s Health and Safety Lab in Derbyshire needed to study the “reach and dispersion” of human “vomitus,” especially its aerosolizing. Working with nauseous patients would be impractical, and thus, researcher Catherine Makison created “Vomiting Larry,” a puke-hurling robot with a range of almost 10 feet. (According to a University of Cambridge researcher, one can be infected by fewer than 20 norovirus particles, each droplet of puke can contain 2 million particles, and the virus remains active on hard surfaces for 12 hours.) ; Research published in February by Britain’s Royal Society science association found that male guppies in mating mode prefer to congregate with plainer, less colorful males, probably for an obvious reason: to look better by comparison. Said Italian researcher Clelia Gasparini, “You want to impress (a female potential mate).” Would you “look more attractive in comparison with (the dowdy, awkward comic star) Mr. Bean or George Clooney?”
; Hottentot golden moles reside underground, which is not so oppressive because they’re blind and navigate by smell and touch. Nonetheless, some scientists spend years studying them, and in a recent issue of Mammalian Biology, South African researchers disclosed that females choose mates largely by penis size. While some human females also favor this particular “pre-copulatory mechanism,” the scientists hypothesized that the moles’ reliance on touch leaves them with no alternative. ; Premium Health Care for Lovable Animals: While some Americans cannot get medically necessary health care, a few lucky animals every year receive exactly what they need from wildlife conservation centers. Most recently, in March, a sandhill crane received deluxe surgery by a facility in Abbotsford, British Columbia, after having his leg shattered on a golf course. Doctors tried several surgeries, then amputated the leg, and have fitted the crane with a prosthesis that allows balance-preserving mobility. (In
; “Even to Icelanders accustomed to harsh weather and isolation,” reported The New York Times in March, the city of Grimsstadir “is a particularly desolate spot.” Nonetheless, Chinese billionaire land developer Huang Nubo has announced he intends to build a luxury hotel and golf course in the area for his countrymen seeking “clean air and solitude.” Since snowfalls often run from September until May, locals are skeptical of Huang’s motives, but he continues to press for a long-term lease covering about 100 square miles for a project estimated to eventually cost about $100 million.
FRONTIERS OF SCIENCE
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February, Suma Aqualife Park near Kobe, Japan, fitted a 190-pound loggerhead turtle with rubber fins kept in place by a vest—to replace fins damaged in what doctors guessed was a shark attack.) ; The Dark Side: Even though human hearts open warmly to helpless animals, kindness is not universal. As Clemson University animal conservation student Nathan Weaver found with a quick experiment late last year, some drivers will deliberately swerve into a turtle trying to cross a busy road—seven drivers, he found, in the space of one hour (though most drivers easily avoided the realistic rubber model). (In the 1979 movie “The Great Santini,” an overbearing fighter-pilot-husband who squishes turtles while driving late at night tells his wife, “It’s my only sport when I’m traveling, my only hobby.”)
LEADING ECONOMIC INDICATORS ; Wealthy Russians have
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recently found a way around the country’s horrid traffic jams: fake ambulances, outfitted with plush interiors for relaxation while specially trained drivers use unauthorized lights and sirens to maneuver through cluttered streets. London’s Daily Telegraph reported in March that “ambulance” companies charge the equivalent of about $200 an hour for these taxis.
PERSPECTIVE
; While Americans Just Sigh: After a trial on fraud charges, the Iranian judiciary sentenced four bankers and their collaborators to death in February and several others to public floggings for obtaining loans by forgery in order to purchase government properties. The total amount involved reportedly was the equivalent of about $2.6 billion— tiny compared to losses suffered since 2008 by investors and customers of large American banks’ illegality, money-laundering and corner-cutting, for which no one has yet been jailed even for a single day.
LEAST COMPETENT CRIMINALS
; So Far, So Good ... Oops!: (1) Husband Jared Rick and wife Ashley walked out of the Wal-Mart in Salem, Ill., in February with about $2,400 in shoplifted merchandise, apparently home free, but in the parking lot got into a loud domestic argument that drew the attention of security officers, who saw the merchandise and matched the Ricks with surveillance video. (2) Corey Moore, a Washington, D.C., “street legend,” according to The Washington Post, for beating one arrest after another on murder and firearms charges, was finally convicted in February and faced at least 15 years in prison. The case was broken by a foot policeman in the suburb of Takoma Park, Md., who saw Moore toss an open bottle of beer into some shrubbery. After a sidewalk chase, a search yielded cocaine, which enabled a search of Moore’s apartment that supplied crucial evidence the police had been lacking for years.
STRANGE OLD WORLD
; Romanian lawyer Madalin Ciculescu, 34, said in April that the next stop for his lawsuit is the European Court of Human Rights after two Romanian courts turned down his claims against Orthodox bishops who failed to exorcize the demons that were causing his flatulence. He sued the archdiocese because at least two exorcisms (one in his office, one at home) proved useless, thus harming his business as well as rendering his home life unpleasant. An archdiocese spokesman said the exorcisms were done properly, by the book.
READERS’ CHOICE
; Took It Too Far: (1) The school board in Windham, Mass., voted in March to ban popular, ubiquitous dodgeball from the district’s curriculum because the game treats players as “human targets.” Dodgeball (even though played these days with a foam ball) also suffers from “eliminating” players as the
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game progresses, which an education professional warned renders them less active than the good players. (2) The Castle View School in Britain’s Essex County issued a specific ban in March against serving popular “triangle-shaped” pancakes after one was thrown at a pupil. (Not affected, reported London’s The Independent, were “rectangle-shaped” pancakes, even though those, of course, have four firm corners instead of three.)
WELL-EARNED RETIREMENT
; In March, twin sisters Louise and Martine Fokkens, 70, announced their joint retirement after more than 50 years each on the job—as Amsterdam prostitutes. (In February, the minimum age for prostitutes in the Netherlands was raised to 21, but there is no maximum.) The twins estimated they had 355,000 client-visits between them, and Martine noted that she still has one devoted regular who she’ll have to disappoint. Louise, though, appeared happier
to hang up her mattress for good because of arthritis. The sisters complained about the legalization of brothels in 2000 (with East European women and pimps outhustling the more genteel Dutch women) and ensuing taxation (which required the women to take on more clients).
CULTURAL DIVERSITY
; “Traditional Taiwanese funerals (combine) somber mourning with louder, up-tempo entertainment to fire up grieving spirits,” reported BBC News in February. They are tailor-made, in other words, for Ms. Liu Jun-Lin, 30, and her Filial Daughters Band with their acrobatic dance routines because Liu has the reputation as Taiwan’s most famous professional mourner. After the musical festivities, Liu dons a white robe and crawls on her hands and knees to the coffin, where she “performs her signature wail.” ; Imagine the Person Who First Suggested This: The newest beauty-
treatment rage in China, according to Chinese media quoted on the Inquisitr.com website in March, is the “fire facial,” in which alcohol and a “secret elixir” are daubed on the face and set ablaze for a few seconds, then extinguished. According to “ancient Chinese medicine,” this will burn off “dull” skin—and also alleviate the common cold and reduce obesity. ; Most of Iceland’s 320,000 inhabitants are at least distantly related to each other, leading the country to compile the “Book of Icelanders” database of family connections dating back 1,200 years. With “accidental” incest thus a genuine problem, three software engineers recently created a mobile phone app that allows strangers to “bump” phones with each other and know, instantly, whether they are closely related. In its first few days of release in April, the developers said it had already been used almost 4,000 times.
LATEST RELIGIOUS MESSAGES ; New York City Councilman Dan Halloran was charged in
April with aiding state Sen. Malcolm Smith’s alleged bribery scheme to run for mayor—thus bringing Halloran’s extraordinary back story light as the first “open” pagan to be elected to office in the U.S. Halloran converted in the 1980s to medieval Theodish, whose outfits and ceremonies resemble scenes from Dungeons & Dragons—horns, sacrifices, feasts, duels using spears and public floggings. (The Village Voice reported in 2011 that Halloran was the “First Atheling” of his own Theodish tribe of 100, called New Normandy, but Halloran said in April that today he is merely an “elder.”) ; The Lord Works in Strange Ways: At least 11 people were killed and 36 injured on March 15 in Tlaxcala, Mexico, when a truck full of fireworks exploded as Catholic celebrants gathered. Rather than remain in the safety of their homes, they had been moved to honor Jesus Tepactepec, the patron saint of a village named after him.
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