Phantasma: Winter 2021 by DAMchic Magazine

PHANTASMA

WINTER 2021

PHANTASMA

LETTER FROM THE EDITOR Coming into the new year, there has been a sense of unsettling realism within the world. It seems like a millennia ago when we first encountered the initial news of the pandemic. Life was still considered to be normal, before all its familiar facets began shuttering down. What was thought to be a brief period of seclusion has stretched into something closer to oblivion. As we stayed inside, we became increasingly detached from the outside world. Our natural desire to seek the tangible presence of other people - to function as social beings - has become more apparent than ever before. With technology at our beckoning, we took to our screens to find the connections that the physical world could not currently offer. For many of us, this time spent online has become both a blessing and a bane. The hours we consumed have filtered into nothingness; time itself no longer feels real. However, the spaces which people have developed online have become a genuine means of escape, a tangent in which many can dream of different realities. The impact that online culture has on modern life can no longer be designated as artificial - in fact, it has become a solidifying layer in our societal foundation. We witness this via the amplified power of stan culture across platforms, in the open celebration of unique personalities, through discussions and trends led by the world’s collective youth. Things that are typically dismissed and do not exist in a physical sense in the “real” world are thriving in this nonlinear space. The theme of our Winter 2021 issue, Phantasma, explores these dreamscapes created by technology. By definition, the word ‘phantasma’ means “something existing in perception only.” In this magazine, DAMchic delves into these dreamlike realities that are found primarily online, where their participants can perceive and directly shape these seemingly immaterial connections. As we venture into the future, I hope that we can experience the warmth of human connection again, that we can embrace the spirit of community wholeheartedly. From the beginning, DAMchic Magazine has always been and continues to be built by the power of students coming together to create art out of pure dedication. Regardless of whether we can meet in person soon, I remain proud of the work that the DAMchic team has done, and I thank you for your passion.

VICKI LIANG

E DIT O R - IN - CH IEF 2

Photographer: Claire Nelson

THE TEAM

From top left to bottom right: Vicki Liang, Jo Carstensen, Ramzy Al-Mulla, Lanikai Yatomi, Ryan Nelson, Avery Hadley, Alex Reich, Nathaniel Olsen, Emma Johnston, Orion Bibee, Owen Preece, Aaron Sanchez, Tanya Bihari, Claire Nelson, Jacob Lagmay, Draken Reeves, Dari Edwards, Jessica Thompson, Kjerstyn Jordhein, and Yuxi Zhu.

EDIT O R -I N- C H I E F V I C K I L IANG

A S S I S TA N T E D I T O R J O C A R S TE NS E N

L EA D PHO T O GR AP H E R

PHOTOGR A PHER S OW EN PREECE COOPER BASKINS AL EX REICH RAMZY AL -MUL L A CL AIRE NEL SON AARON SANCHEZ JACOB L AGMAY

R A M Z Y AL- MULLA

DES IG N E D I T O R

PR I N T R EPORTER S

C O N T R IB U T I NG D I R E C T O R S

F R EELA N CER S

C H L O E J AME S ON

O R I O N B IBE E A L I F UE RTE C L A I R E NE LS ON D R A K E N R E E VE S A A R O N S ANCHE Z E M M A J OHNS TON RYA N NE LS ON J E S S I C A T HOMPS ON N AT H A N I E L OLS E N L A N I K A I YATOMI TA N YA B IHAR I D A R I E DWAR DS AV E RY HADLE Y

M ODELS

MYL A GARL IT Z PRISCIL A ARECHIGA MARIAMA MBODJ EL IZABET H L EE NATAL IE ZAKAIB GEORGE ZAKAIB DRAKEN REEVES ANNA SEVRUK L INDSEY NGUYEN MYA F ORT IER ADISON SCOT T INES MBOUYA

GABBY NEDNEY

KEL SEY BIGEL OW NAOMI KL EINSCHMIT HANNA RAE HEL F T YUXI ZHU KYL E SCHW ER HANNA JONES KJERST YN JORDHEIM KHEIL AN KUSSAL ANANT

LOCATI ON S

SAUVIE ISL AND HUGHER WAT ER GARDENS BAL D HIL L NAT URAL AREA MISSISSIPPI ST. PDX DOW NT OW N PORT L AND

CLOTHI N G

U4EAH ASOS DEPOP F OREVER 21 GOODW IL L AMAZON SHEIN INEX T HE URBAN GAP NIKE APARSO URBAN OUT F IT T ERS VAL UE VIL L AGE ZARA

Celestial Bodies

Ethereal Volume

FEMME (?)

Cherry Colored Funk 4

Cosmographica

Glitch

Synthetic Camp

Looking Inward: Journey Towards Equanimity

Outside The Box 5

Celestial Bodies Director and writer: Tanya Bihari Photographer: Jacob Lagmay Stylist: Kelsey Bigelow Model: Myla Garlitz

Astrology is known as the study of the movements and relative positions of celestial bodies interpreted as having an influence on human affairs and the natural world, which ultimately influences our moods, daily life, and most significantly defines who we are. Since the start of COVID-19 pandemic in 2020, life hasn’t been the same and issues such as terrorism, politics, climate change, and racism quickly added on to our overtaxed lives. People are looking to astrology to help them feel less lonely and afraid during these times, with the pseudoscience offering the comfort of imagining a better future. Astrology creates an out of body experience and relatable feeling for some people. When times get tough, people tend to look for a way out and get a break from reality. In this time, there are so many things going on, it is really hard to know what to do or how to feel when there is so much negativity in the world. People resort to dreaming and imagination when they want to be at peace with themselves and their environment. This is the kind of energy astrology exudes. In such distressing times, astrology can offer hope by implementing the idea of karma and that things will eventually be alright. As explained by Portland School of Astrology administrator J.P. Hawthorne, astrology can be used to validate our lives and how we are built individually. He maintains that astrology is a helpful piece of information when people are navigating their lives and that they can use that information to find out what they need in order to maintain a great lifestyle. “Astrology is not mainly about balance but it is more about understanding self and what you are looking for in life.” he states. Astrology enthusiasts believe it can answer the question of what our purpose is in society and how we can be vocationally satisfied in our future. Hawthrone also discusses how astrology is mostly a tool and less of a belief system. He explains it has cyclical nature and how seeing our lives in cyclical patterns can be helpful when planning and giving us perspective on our futures. Hawthorne also explains how the pressures in our society can force us to fit a certain mold, which astrology helps us to break. Oftentimes, it can give us permission to steer into a different path in life in order to express and understand our true selves. In an article in Sbpress, K’la Rivers’, an astrologer, explains that we are living in an age of rebellion and cultural shifts, where the younger generation is beginning to break away from the norms of older ones. “Astrology acts as your own indicator and makes you a god of your own faith; it’s just giving yourself power to create the life that you want to live.” People in general are becoming dissatisfied with the strict cultural and religious frameworks in our current society. Younger generations especially find themselves stifled in these settings and astrology can give them a means to explore themselves more deeply without societal restrictions and religious framework. Renowned astrologer Chani Nicolas explains that people have this desire to receive permission before being able to accept themselves. From her perspective, astrology is this perfect fit of self-reflection, humor, and identification, describing how “Astrology is like a really good friend.” Hawthorne delineates astrology as a tool that can introduce someone to another dimension of themselves which promotes self-knowledge. It can also help us relate to others and foster a greater understanding of human nature. Astrology, like fashion, is an expression of oneself. Hawthorne states, “Currently, Neptune is representing what is happening in pop culture, music, and fashion and that the most common fashion trends we see are people with pastels and flowy clothes all influenced by the zodiac sign of Pisces.” Overall, astrology and fashion have many things in common. They’re both cyclical, they worship the beauty of symbols, they both make references to the past, and as Hawthorne says, “People in fashion can easily predict trends through zodiacs.”

FEMME (?) Director and illustrator: Lanikai Yatomi Writer: Gabby Nedney

Being a woman in the modern world has its challenges, it is the unrebuttable truth. Nonetheless, a new era of femininity is rising, and it’s changing fashion like never before. “We as women constantly feel societal pressures to be better,” Oregon State University freshman Ruby Robinson revealed. As young girls, most women were told to dress in a way that concealed their authentic selves. Whether it be through fashion, sexuality, or simply their opinions, women have been taught to be small, respectful, and to be what society wants them to be. Santana Ciddio, another student at OSU, emphasized on the increasingly popular opinion that “women should wear whatever makes them feel powerful, they shouldn’t give a shit if others think otherwise.” Femininity, in itself, is largely defined as the stereotypically softer qualities of being a woman, such as politeness, compassion, and modesty. These expectations for the so-called “ideal” woman have been implemented for centuries, embedding themselves into the daily lives of women from every background. The feminism movement has been rewritten four times, each time with a different central focus. Past movements criticized dressing “girly” or in a feminine fashion, as it was associated with weakness and submission; however in the current movement, the fourth wave of feminism, the focus is empowerment and strength. The idea is to debunk gender norms and increase gender equality on all platforms and in all situations. Historically, femininity was defined by two genders: male and female. However, the distinct line between the two is constantly blurring, giving way to a more fluid definition of what is masculine and what is feminine. This concept of blurring norms is a focal point of the current feminism movement.

In today’s feminist crusade, there has been an uprising of confidence in and acceptance of femininity. Young women are experimenting with confidence in their feminine side through fashion and sexuality, dressing less for the approval of others, and more for themselves. Children are being taught to wear what they feel most represents themselves, as seen in young boys, such as 5-yearold Brody Schaffer (@bossbabybrody on Instagram), wearing Disney princess dresses and traditionally feminine outfits. There has been an increase of fluidity in fashion with men, as young and old push the limits to what society defines as masculine. Men are bending the rules by sporting feminine fashion in a way that has never been seen before. However, reactions toward the increase in femininity through fashion vary when it comes to who is wearing what. “Men start wearing skirts or some eyeliner and are praised like gods by the internet,” admitted Robinson, “Of course there is always backlash from some people… but it seems a lot more harsh when women do the same thing.” In the fashion world, men are most commonly idolized for making “groundbreaking” fashion risks. A man wearing a dress might be celebrated for his bravery; but a woman wearing the same dress will most likely receive criticism for her taste. The shift in femininity can also be seen in the professional workplace. Tricia Timm, an advisor and investor in start-up companies, discussed how femininity has changed over the past 25 years. When asked what role fashion played when her professional career began, she explained how if a young woman “wore anything that was not conservative… you would have been dismissed fairly quickly or not respected.” However, she divulged that she has recently seen more feminine styles owned and worn in the workplace, and she believes “the younger generation is even more willing to show up as their authentic self.” Femininity is multifaceted. It hasn’t always been, but recent times have proven that there is no true definition of what femininity is. There will always be the challenge of societal expectations, but the true challenge is testing the limits of those expectations to be who you want to be.

ethereal volume 15

A moment where we acknowledge we are small creations of something bigger than ourselves. All of a sudden, worries you had before have slowly started diminishing, and it’s just you and the green space surrounding you. Water, trees, bamboo and leaves are all creations of something before you. Breathing in the cold crisp air you start to realize what in life becomes important. A worry so small can take over someone’s life, but if you can take the time to slow down and think about nothing but breathing you can find your inner peace.

Director and photographer: Aaron Sanchez Models: Priscila Arechiga and Mariama Mbodj

Ethereal Volume captures what it feels like to feel slowed down in a world full of distraction. It encapsulates the experience of moments alone and embraces the gracefulness of being alive. The light soft fabrics sway through the air representing the feeling of gratitude and peace. It’s that moment in time where you realize it’s only yourself and the entire world around you. 16

This series sets a reminder that it is okay to slow down and think about nothing. Life moves so fast that we can spend a little time appreciating the small things the universe has to offer. Ethereal Volume focuses attention on the simplicity of life, and the feeling of being alive. Finding time for yourself allows for you to feel no pressure from the outside sources and understanding that being alone with no thoughts is one of the most beautiful things life has to offer. While there is a balance between social interaction and being alone, it is important to acknowledge that when you do get time alone, think about nothing but the space and air around you and appreciate the silence.

Sometimes the most silent things in life are the most deafening.

Director and writer: Emma Johnston Photographer: Cooper Baskins Model: Elizabeth Lee As I’m scrolling through my Tiktok ‘for you page,’ a creator shows off the pair of pants they just thrift-flipped from an old children’s blanket. This is one of thousands of thrift-flips that have emerged from the app; turning wornout T-shirts into fitted dresses, discarded DVD cases into purses, used Nike apparel into corsets, and the list goes on. Thriftflipping is a craft that has existed as long as thrift stores have. However, with the emergence of social media platforms and sustainable consciousness, the practice has grown exponentially. During the COVID-19 pandemic, young people have had plenty of free time to express and reinvent themselves. Not only has thrift-flipping become a fun new hobby, many young creatives have taken it to the next level by reimagining the path of becoming a fashion designer and vintage reseller. 21

With reselling apps such as Depop and Poshmark emerging, young creatives have newfound freedom and accessibility in starting a fashion business. While Ebay has been the dominant resell company of the previous decades, these new resell apps are quickly gaining massive popularity by modernizing the practice through incorporating elements of social media platforms. Interestingly enough, this fashion subculture has taken on the aesthetics primarily of the late 90s and early 2000s. Within the fashion industry, this phenomenon is commonly referred to as the “20 year rule.” Give or take a few years, trends typically cycle back within a 20 year period. This doesn’t necessarily result in carbon copies of the same trends but rather a combination of nostalgia and originality. Looking back at the top fashion designers who pioneered late ‘90s and early ‘00s fashion - including those such as Vivienne Westwood, Jean Paul Gaultier, Alexander McQueen, and Kimora Lee Simmons - we can see their designs as major inspiration to today’s DIY thrift aesthetic. These designers repopularized corsets, mesh tops, platform shoes, bedazzling, velvet, ruffles, crop tops, track suits, and much more. Rather than leaving these old clothes as is, young creatives are adding an avant-garde twist. This can be seen in the manipulating of silhouettes to look asymmetrical, patchy, and turned inside out. Other efforts include adding extra materials such as safety pins, embroidery, patches, or paint. Some even apply their original graphic designs through screen printing. This trend embodies a generation of kids born into the age of the internet. Looking back at the ‘cyberpunk’ and ‘Y2K’ fashion trend of the late ‘90s, there was a sense of optimism for the future of the internet. With this particular trend making a comeback on social media platforms for young people who spend seemingly their whole lives through a screen, there seems to be a nostalgia for the naivety of this time period; a sense of longing for a generation that didn’t grow up entirely on the internet. However, Gen Z wants to make a difference. They want to create a more sustainable, accessible, and tolerant world, one in which the internet has allowed. The internet provides a space of limitless knowledge, community, and creativity - one that definitely manifests in DIY thrift culture. 22

Director, photographer and writer: Jessica Thompson Models: Natalie Zakaib and George Zakaib

FROM OTHERWORLDLY DESIGN TO A WORLDLY PRESENCE This shoot was inspired by the SpaceX Crew Dragon’s astronaut suits, Whethan’s cover art for their 2020 album “Fantasy,” and Lil Nas X’s collaboration piece with HIGHSNOBIETY, titled “LIL NAS X HAS BROKEN THE INTERNET & THE WORLD IS NEXT,” written by freelance journalist Sydney Gore and styled by fashion designer Corey Stokes. The editorial refers to Lil Nas X as a trailblazer, “a self-made breakout success story from the digital world, sent to explore the mysterious in-between while challenging America’s outdated norms.” In this piece, I was attempting to create a relaxed representation of a visual world from the dreamscape of my imagination. With a focus on the astral plane, a dimension where time and space cease to exist.

Do you ever feel as if you don’t belong to this world? Well... it’s probably because you don’t. We are not alone in this Universe. To say that we are the only planet in the entire Universe that sustains life would be to say that if you threw a million seeds into a field only one of them would be expected to sprout a seedling. In the National Geographic article “How many alien civilizations are out there? A new galactic survey holds a clue,” scientific journalist Nadia Drake says that the Kepler Space Mission with the help of the European Space Agency’s Gaia spacecraft, declared that there are, “more than 300 million worlds with similar conditions to Earth [that] are scattered throughout the Milky Way galaxy.” As per NASA’s Exoplanet Science Institute Program, there are a confirmed 4,331 exoplanets in our galaxy alone. This does not include sister galaxies like the Alpha Centauri system that houses Sirius A and B, the Andromeda Galaxy, Ursa Major and minor, the Pleiades star-system, and the Dracon starsystem. These star systems all have left their mark on present and ancient cosmological and astrological histories. Fans of ufology have undoubtedly heard of the term the Galactic Federation of Light (GFL). Arcturis being one of the closest planets to Earth (36.66 light years away), is rumored to house an unfathomably intelligent 9D species of metaphysically advanced societies, who joined the GFL 3.75 million years ago. Space related garments were launched into popularity with the onset of the 1960s’ Space Race. On July 20th, 1969 the Space Race was triumphed by Neil Armstrong, Edwin “Buzz” Aldrin, and Michael Collins. Recalling the famous quote, “That’s one small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind,” a contextless prism was created for imaginative possibilities about what sentient humanoid creatures wear on these extraterrestrial planets (if they are to wear anything at all). 26

This sector of the fashion industry became first popularized in 1964 by designer pioneer, Andre Courrèges, who has been dubbed the ‘Godfather of Space-Age Couturier’ with innovations in the go-go boot and the A-Line skirt. According to The Cut article “A Look Back at André Courrèges’s Space-Age Style,” by Véronique Hyland, Courrèges “had a lifelong fascination with science and technology, and called his studio [their] “secret laboratory.” Their legacy lives on through a multitude of other designers such as Gareth Pugh, Iris Van Herpen, JeanPaul Gaultier, and Thierry Mugler. Iterations of futuristic, spaceinspired styles have been featured in magazines such as Vogue and WÜL Magazine and by brands like Off-White, Chanel, Louis Vuitton, and Ralph Lauren. Futuristic forecasting and innovation in fashion have been inspired by the advent of space travel. The complexities and fascination of our universe and galaxy have inspired many to explore the space courtier sector of the design world. If fashion could simply be a reflection of what’s out there... this is what we could only begin to fathom.

The Performative Use of Queerness Director, model, and writer: Draken Reeves Photographer: Ramzy Al-Mulla

It is undeniable the shock waves that went through Twitter and discussions on social media the day Harry Styles graced the cover of a prominent fashion magazine wearing a skirt. As a femme and gender-nonconforming presenting queer man, I had many straight friends come up, expecting applause of the “bravery” exhibited by Styles. Suffice to say, I felt unimpressed and confused by the mainstream attention. If anything, it highlights the issues within queer spaces that heterosexual society generalizes. Within fashion, we’ve seen a rise in extrapolation and abstraction of the idea of Camp, an inherently queer concept highlighting the ostentatious and the boundary-breaking. As the idea of camp rises, the more we see the erasure of queer iconography and history. We come to a problem here where “camp” is recognized predominantly by the 2019 Met Gala Theme, Camp: Notes on Fashion. The Metropolitan Museum of Art based the exhibit on Susan Sontag’s infamous 1964 essay “Notes on Camp.” The night was filled with celebrities, predominantly heterosexual, who abstracted the idea of camp to “weird,” coming simply in a brightly colored dress or suit. In short, they did not do their homework. However, we can’t blame them. Camp is a complex concept that is difficult to define. Camp is an accidental celebration of the spontaneous, the humorous, and the breaking of norms. Within her essay, Sontag defines camp through a listicle format, detailing and outlining a multifaceted, queer theory into 58 simple commandments. The rules range from “To camp is a mode of seduction -- one which employs flamboyant mannerisms susceptible of a double interpretation” to “Not only is there a Camp vision, a Camp way of looking at things.” 29

The latter example is a popular application, in which we describe bad movies with cult followings “campy.” Camp filmmaker John Waters describes the eye for camp perfectly in his book “Shock Value: A Tasteful Book About Bad Taste.” Waters writes, “.. bad taste is what entertainment is all about... but one must remember that there is such a thing as good bad taste and bad bad taste. To understand bad taste one must have very good taste.” Camp is very much based on this foundational idea that something can be so bad that is good. In terms of mainstream appeal, think of it like watching a terrible B-horror movie and joking about it with your friends. The issue with camp’s rise in popularity is the continual erasure of its roots. When Styles is paraded about as breaking barriers for wearing a skirt, it is dismissive of the people whose lives are truly centered and often put in danger for simply being themselves. An example I often bring up is the production of the 1990 documentary “Paris is Burning,” directed by Jennie Livingston. The film follows the 1980’s house and ballroom scene in New York made up of BIPOC performers, drag legends, and transgender individuals.

The balls included categories, such as Executive, Femme Queen, and even Military; it is full camp, it was performative while encapsulating themselves. The film brought the dance “voguing” into the mainstream, a form in which you replicate poses made by models. While the film is an amazing cultural touchstone for queer history and culture, Livingston (who comes from a white, uppermiddle-class background) pocketed the profits. Many of the performers who were featured in the documentary did not see a single penny from the film and died of HIV/ AIDS. As for voguing, Madonna adopted it for her hit “Vogue,” leading to the heterosexual connection of voguing as her creation. When I see Harry Styles in a skirt, I don’t see courage or boundary-breaking. Coming from a fan, I see someone who is benefitting from a place of privilege, sexual ambiguity, and an upper-class status. BIPOC gendernonconforming individuals have done what he has for centuries and have been incarcerated, systemically oppressed, beaten, sexually assaulted, and killed for expressing themselves.

The adoption of camp in a mainstream, heterosexual situation is a cop-out for straight society to say to queer people, “Look, we have a man in a skirt! Aren’t you satisfied?” It’s tiring to see straight people fawned over for things queer people have done for ages. So where do we go from here? Is camp untouchable? The answer is no, we just need better representation. We need more representation in fashion and the arts that pay to uplift the voices of queer BIPOC folk. We need to teach the history of pop culture and its abstractions. Most importantly, we need to give credit and understand the importance of proper representation.

OUT

TSIDE

THE

B O X

Director and writer: Nathaniel Olsen Photographer: Owen Preece Models: Anna Sevruk and Lindsey Nguyen As painter David Hockney said, “Perspective is the strangling of space.” Nothing has been nearly as strangling as the harsh lines of our bedroom walls over 2020; static and glacial. Feeling stuck and lost at the same time can be one of the most gut wrenchingly depressing experiences that humans can face, made even worse by the fact that the entire world shares in this sense of collective imprisonment of thought, desire, and exploration. Countless people have turned toward lost provincial arts, like sewing, cooking, baking, or the most archaic of them all: working out regularly. No matter how you reconnect with the ancient ways of your pastoral ancestors, finding a redefinition to what community could or should look like in a world devoid of touch is vital, and just as equally arduous, for everybody. Loss of self and the feelings of complacency are oftentimes doubled down by the loss of family, friends and loved ones. 33

This past year has been a grueling and dreadful nightmare. However, silver linings still presented themselves. For some people, the reformed definition of community led them to look more to online dreamscapes to provide them with the comfort and belonging they needed. Increased traffic on fashion blogs such as Reddit and Instagram, in addition to the boom of fashionrelated content on TikTok, showed how wonderful a place the internet can be for those interested in fashion. Recreating fashion trends from past decades, sharing your thrifting hauls, or giving your feed a daily reminder that you are the style icon of the century; all became healthy escapes from the same old boring four walls of the quarantine box. The feeling of elysian bliss from finding the perfect outfit is much too strong to be contained simply by the borders of a concrete runway, and with nowhere to go, the bedroom seamlessly turned into the runway itself. If it hadn’t been for the internet, our thoughts and feelings conveyed through the clothing we put on our body might have flickered away with a simple breeze. Our social media feeds could become the time capsule that lives on long after we pass on, long after the isolation of 2020. Each post, like, and comment have become an everlasting flag post in the ground. And while physically intangible, they plant you eternally in the ethos and mythos of the epoch of humanity. Another popular online extension of the fashion rworld can be found across YouTube. In an age where everything seems to be hyper-commercialized, YouTube fashion content is one of the most fulfilling and wholeheartedly open spaces that the internet has to offer.

Bliss Foster, an independent fashion journalist and YouTuber, has observed how the landscape of online fashion communities has shifted in the midst of the COVID-19 pandemic. “I’m not sure about the effects that COVID has had on my online community. On the one hand I guess people might have more free time during the pandemic, but lots of stats are showing that people are watching less YouTube and Netflix and stuff during the pandemic, so there’s this question of what people are actually doing. Fashion communities are always changing. When I first got into the scene, everything was about forums. Those places had some really distinct advantages over Discord servers, and now the servers have some advantages over the forums. Change is inevitable.” And Bliss is right, social media platforms like Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook have exploded in recent years. During 2019 alone social media usage grew 9% totaling to 3.8 billion worldwide users, according to a Kepios analysis. Online blogs and forums are not far behind with the industry leader, Reddit, claiming to have seen a 30% increase in monthly users. The internet has proven itself to be a wonderful place to grow and open up our minds to the unending and innovative world of fashion. Whether it is Youtube, Instagram, Tiktok, Reddit, or Discord, telling your narrative is as simple as a click. There has never been a better time to escape the strict confines of everyday life, and dive into the vast, diverse, and vibrant content that online fashion communities have to offer.

Director: Ali Fuerte Photographer: Claire Nelson Models: Mya Fortier and Adison Scott 37

GLITTER >System Loading…. >Slowly loading,

When I wake up in the morning I buffer, >Wake up, Wake up, Wake up >I can’t.

I am never fully loaded, but the duality of the situation is at the same time, I am a loaded gun. >>Fire? >>Empty Clip? Everything feels broken, >>>SYSTEM MALFUNCTION. Options: >> Pretend

>> Drink Water >> Get help

Can I touch what I can see? Is my reality different from everyone elses? Am I the only one that is glitching? My friends say they feel it too, >So we feel it together, >Slowly slipping into void, They don’t say anything when I stare at the wall too long, They stare too. I have a theory that sad people stare at ceilings longer than most, Appreciating the array of complex patterns, In a twisted way it reminds us of when we were kids, staring up at the sky Giggling as we saw the faces smiling back at us, 38

Now that we’re older, Those faces don’t smile. Viruses run through system, It’s fun at first, The initial race,

our

>>>SYSTEM CRASH.

>>Reboot.

>System Loading…...

w Ed ri Da c h r: ei i te R wr lex ya nd r: A ou r a he Mb c to a p s re g r I n e D i o to l s : Ph ode M

ds ar

looking inward: journey towards equanimity When left to one’s own thoughts, where does the mind wander but to a space of loneliness and negativity? Amidst the COVID-19 pandemic, there has been evidence that now more than ever individuals are dealing with and being diagnosed with severe depression, anxiety, and other mental health issues related to the lack of physical and emotional connection to others. According to the American Psychological Association, social connection is a “fundamental human need” and our health and happiness are very well dependent on it. It is also noted that when humans are subject to long periods of social isolation or loneliness, the body naturally responds with a “fight or flight” mentality, increasing risks of stress, difficulty sleeping, chronic depression, anxiety, and decreased immune system functions, leading to many other health complications down the road. It is evident that along with the current global health crisis, there is also a problem arising regarding mental health, stemming from quarantine and other precautionary measures that have been created to decrease the spread of the coronavirus. So, if the only way to prevent the spread of this deadly disease worldwide is to isolate and decrease social interactions, how do we work to combat the problem of needing to feel more connected? 41

The answer to this question for many, is the infallible technique of looking inward, cultivating mindfulness, and working toward a state of equanimity. The Insight Meditation Center notes that equanimity has roots in Buddhist practices, but ultimately is the cultivation of calmness, stability, and strength within oneself in order to reach a state of internal balance, regardless of any external circumstances and stressors. This peaceful mindset is said to be achieved over time as individuals work to increase mindfulness and integrate daily practices to become more aware of thought patterns and emotions. Although, one of the most important steps to fortify equanimity is to be able to see the world as it is and to “let go of our reactive tendencies’’ that do not serve our work towards a more positive and balanced mindset. According to Nicole Bell, OSU alum and yoga teacher, finding equilibrium through mindful practices doesn’t have to be “fancy or life-altering each time.” Instead, a regular practice of meditation and yoga has helped her to “become more resilient against the emotional stressors of the pandemic and life as a college student during these times.” Participating in activities that foster the practice of psychologically distancing one’s physical self from one’s emotional self is proven to have many beneficial outcomes, including the ability to better self-reflect, decrease reactivity to external situations that don’t require our attention, and to stop the negative effects of chronic overthinking. Imagine feeling so serene with your inner thoughts and emotions that you find yourself no longer dwelling on the fact that you are lonely or socially isolated, but instead feeling fulfilled spending time with yourself, better understanding your personal inner and outer worlds, and not being affected by outside stressors. 42

Of course, this process is not a snap-ofthe-fingers type of deal, it is an experience of growth and personal empowerment that occurs over time and through practice. Laurasia Mattingly, meditation teacher and author of “Meditations on Self-Love” teaches equanimity in her practices and emphasizes that finding this stability of mind comes through the challenge of consistently returning to the present moment, no matter how difficult or unpleasant, seeing it how it truly is, and greeting it without judgement. She talks about how our outer world is ever-changing, shifting, and at times presenting difficulties, but when you look inward, reflect, and strengthen the mind through mindfulness practices, you uncover ways to remain centered and unperturbed by things that are out of your control. In turn, the real question seems to be, what can you incorporate into your daily routine that will help you to create more balance within yourself? On a daily basis when faced with difficult situations, it is recommended to be intent on evaluating those situations from a neutral stance, without judgement. Find ways in which you can assess the current situation and not automatically deem it as negative, but instead learn from what is happening. In order to further develop this skill, there are many different channels individuals use to practice inward reflection and mindfulness, just a short list of these include guided meditation, deep breathing techniques, journaling, hypnosis, aromatherapy, and yoga. Find the practices that speak to you the most, and incorporate them in such a way that you can move beyond the stresses of daily life, strategically regulate emotions, cultivate metaawareness, and continue on your lifelong journey to equanimity.

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