2022 MF MAY

y youngest daughter came home from school the other day and told me about a lesson that taught students in her classroom about having a growth mindset and practicing grit — courage, resilience, perseverance and passion. This refreshing concept of not giving up must have also been something that Nashville star RaeLynn learned early on. After deciding in her teens that she wanted a country music career, she auditioned for the television singing competition “The Voice” in 2012 and made it to the quarterfinals. Though being eliminated was a disappointment, RaeLynn said in our cover feature that losing only made her stronger.

“Even though it was a success to be on the show, that little bit of letdown was very good for me because it made me want to work even harder,” she said.

Today, RaeLynn’s grit has led her to a slew of success, including several acclaimed albums and a tour that kicks off this month. She balances her music career with life as a new mom and military spouse. Read about her positive mentality and how she continues to move forward in “Born to be bold” on page 10.

Our annual military spouse issue also spotlights many others who have a hard time giving up. The Rapid Fire interview this month

Elizabeth Aslakson

Jennifer Barnhill

Nikki Davidson

Stephanie Fox

focuses on Alyssa Clark, an ultrarunner who set a Guinness World Record for running 95 marathons in 95 days. Find out what inspired her on page 30 and if she ever wanted to quit.

Perseverance and passion have led to lucrative new careers for other spouses throughout the pages of this issue. Learn about a woman who found a following for her ability to transform a thrift store dresses into stunning gowns or others who are thriving as STEM instructors with a nonprofit that hosts science, technology and mathematics programming for young girls.

Kristen De Deyn Kirk

Kate Lewis

Ashley Losoya

Peyton Roberts

@militaryfamiliesmagazine

@MilitaryFamiliesMagazine

@MilFamiliesMag

There is no question that military spouses need to be adaptable in an ever-shifting lifestyle. Often, challenges turn into something even better, especially with the right attitude.

Onward,

Melissa M. Stewart

Editor

ON THE COVER

Content

Navy spouse Alyssa Amos Clark says with all her moves, running has been a constant.

Nashville star RaeLynn and her husband, Josh Davis, added a daughter, Daisy Rae, to their military family in September 2021.

Nashville star and military spouse RaeLynn.

Photo by Alysse Gafkjen, www.alyssegafkjen.com

Styling by Krista Roser, The Only Agency, www.theonly.agency.

Glam by Jessie Law Tailoring by Aubrey Hyde

Born to be bold

by Ashley Losoya

by Author Name

Military Families Magazine by AmeriForce Media, LLC, is published 10 times a year for active-duty service members, veterans, and their families. Copies are available through participating family service centers, relocation offices, transition offices, base lodges, libraries, daycare centers, MWR activities and other locations by request. Unit requests can be made online at https:// militaryfamilies.com/print-magazines/

Individuals can order a free digital copy of this issue at https://militaryfamilies.com/digital-magazines/ Editorial comments can be emailed to managing.editor@ameriforcemedia.com

Military Families Magazine is published by AmeriForce Media, LLC, Bloomington, Indiana, a private company. Information and advertisements in this publication do not constitute endorsement by any branch of the military or the Department of Defense. No part of this publication may be copied without the express written permission of the publishers. AmeriForce Media, LLC, the publishers, and publisher’s agents make no endorsement of any advertised services or products and none should be inferred.

Emergency messages assist military families during crises 14

by Stephanie Fox

Author takes on threat of global war in two upcoming novels 22

by Kate Lewis

Never forgotten 24

by Peyton H. Roberts

Wardrobe reboot 28

by Nikki Davidson

EDITORIAL

President and Publisher: Todd Taranto

Managing Editor: Bianca Strzalkowski

Content Editor: Melissa M. Stewart

Associate Editors: Kari Williams and Teal Yost

ADVERTISING

PLEASE CALL 703-337-8100

Vice President, Sales: Julie Miller

Julie.Miller@AmeriForceMedia.com

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Design: Open Look Business Solutions

AmeriForce Media, LLC 304 Kirkwood Avenue, Suite 100 Bloomington, IN 47404 https://ameriforcemedia.com

MIL FAM BRIEFS matters

EXHIBIT: ASSISTANCE:

The amount of military-connected family respondents that indicated challenges with family building in the 2021 Military Family Lifestyle Survey by Blue Star Families. Full the full report, visit https://bluestarfam.org/research/ mfls-survey-results-2021/

The AKC Museum of the Dog is hosting “Dogs of War and Peace” through July 19. Ten life-sized, carved-wood allegorical memorials by sculptor James Mellick will be on display from his “Wounded Warrior Dogs” and “Over the Rainbow Bridge” collections. This installation, celebrating the bond beyond the battlefield, highlights military dogs from World War II to Afghanistan. For more information visit https://museumofthedog.org/ calendar/month.

EVENT: The National Memorial Day Concert will be broadcast on PBS on May 29 at 8 p.m. (check local listings) and streamed live on https://www.pbs.org/ national-memorial-day-concert/. The event honors the sacrifice of service members through tributes, music and special guests. Check the website for the announcement of the full 2022 lineup. Last year’s event was hosted by Joe Mantegna and Gary Sinise. Musical performances included Gladys Knight, Vince Gill, Sara Bareilles, Alan Jackson, Denyce Graves and The Four Tops.

Overheard:Overheard:

CNN anchor and military spouse Brianna Keilar when discussing the ups and downs of military life with Military Families Magazine. Read the full story at https://militaryfamilies.com/military-spouses/ close-up-with-cnn-anchor-and-military-spousebrianna-keilar/.

Both Navy and Air Force housing have now implemented the HEAT (Housing Early Assistance Tool) to help service members and their families obtain housing information and get the housing process started online before or after receiving their PCS orders. CONUS and most OCONUS installations are accessible through the tool. To learn more visit www.cnic.navy.mil/ffr/ housing/heat.html

“There are people who do look at this life and they say that it’s really difficult, but then maybe they aren’t absorbing the gifts that come along with it, too.”

FAVORITES

GIVEAWAYS

This month Military Families Magazine will feature Army Maj. Jen McClary, the Grape Juice Mom, for our #militaryfamiliesfavorites. This certified sommelier turned vino into a second career, “demystifying wine one taste at a time.” Make sure to follow our Instagram page @militaryfamiliesmagazine, where we will give you the opportunity to win one of McClary’s date night wine tasting boxes. And join us for a Facebook Live on May 25, National Wine Day, when she will offer some of her top tasting tips.

Reads

Our Military Families Magazine Book Club pick for May is “Homicide and Halo-Halo” by Mia P. Manansala. The story is about Lila Macapagal, who is uneasy with several aspects of her life — love, career and the start of summer (her least favorite season). To make matters worse, her little town of Shady Palms resurrected a beauty pageant that she won years ago, restoring an old rivalry and turning the story into a riveting mystery when the head judge is murdered. Look for a full review this month on militaryfamilies. com and join us our Facebook page to discuss with the #militaryfamiliesbookclub.

ONLINE EXCLUSIVE

Going on any summer road trips? Before you head out, don’t miss our list of 10 military-connected podcasts that should be on your radar (and playlist) Whether you’re a history buff who wants to learn about World War II, seek inspiration from the survival stories of wounded warriors or find encouragement during your next deployment, there’s a wealth of military-connected content available in the podcast universe. Full details can be found at https://militaryfamilies. com/entertainment/10-military-connected-podcasts-thatshould-be-on-your-radar-and-playlist/.

Resources revealed

Get out and explore the great outdoors this summer. The National Park Service, in partnership with Operation Live Well, would like to thank military personnel and their families for their service through a new pass program that invites them to enjoy national parks at no cost. Gold Star families, active duty, veterans and their families are eligible to receive free lifetime access to more than 2,000 federal recreation areas, including national parks, wildlife refuges and forests. For more information on the Interagency Annual Military Pass visit https://www.nps. gov/planyourvisit/veterans-and-gold-star-families-freeaccess.htm

BEYOND THE BASE

Marine Corps Air Station Miramar

Location: About 15 miles north of downtown San Diego, California, near the town of Mira Mesa.

Military Population: 11,202 activeduty service members, 918 reservists and 319 civilian personnel

This former cattle and citrus ranch was once used by both the Navy and Marine Corps for advanced pilot training during World War II. After the war, the Navy turned it into “Fightertown USA,” home to F-14 squadrons and TOPGUN during its 50-year occupation of the base. Today, Miramar houses the 3rd Marine Aircraft Wing, an aviation element of the 1st Marine Expeditionary Force. Temperate weather, water-activities galore, top-notch Mexican restaurants and more — congratulations if you are currently stationed here. Check out a few recommendations for your time beyond the base.

• Spot a wild seal or sea lion along the La Jolla beach shoreline — from the sea caves to the Children’s Pool Beach (also known as Casa Beach)

• Indulge in traditional Mexican street food such as slow-cooked beef shank tacos at City Tacos or head to Lola 55 for a more upscale south-of-theborder experience.

• Learn to fly a stunt plane at Sky Combat Ace, created by an Air Force veteran fighter pilot who wanted to bring the thrill of flying fighter jets to everyone.

• Take advantage of free admission to the San Diego Zoo and Safari Park. Active-duty service members receive a complimentary one-day pass, while spouses and eligible dependents get a 10% discount.

• Catch a wave the right way with San Diego Surf School, offering daily lessons, camps, retreats, rentals and more.

• Encounter a dolphin up close at SeaWorld San Diego. The Waves of Honor program offers free admission to active-duty service members and their families.

• Hike often at Joshua Tree National Park and never trek the same trail twice.

• Celebrate the 100th anniversary of the aircraft carrier at the USS Midway Museum. See side-by-side replicas of the first and the newest class of aircraft carriers.

Courtesy photos by San Diego Tourism Authority

Nonprofit offers community, advice for spouses facing transition

BY KRISTEN DE DEYN KIRK - SPONSORED

Anna Larson’s husband left the Army on April 1, 2021, April Fool’s Day.

Anna was not in a joking mood, though.

“I had a meltdown,” the military spouse of 16 years shares. “A complete meltdown.”

Chief Warrant Officer 3 John Larson left their home near Fort Hood, Texas, to pick up his DD214, the paperwork signifying his separation from the Army after 22 years. Anna stayed home and panicked about books.

“My best friend consoled me as all I could think of was ‘I forgot to call and see if I could still go to the on-post library,’” Anna says. “We live in the United States. There are plenty of libraries, but that thought was the little, tiny straw that made me break, made me feel, ‘We’re not ready yet. We’re not prepared yet!’”

Now, as an ambassador for SpouseLink, created by AAFMAA (the American Armed Forces Mutual Aid Association), Anna educates fellow military spouses on military transitions. AAFMAA, the longest-standing nonprofit association exclusively serving the military community with life insurance, mortgages and wealth management, launched SpouseLink in 2012 to offer a community for

military spouses to connect, share experiences and get advice and resources.

Anna’s first piece of advice? Prioritize yourself.

Anna rushed around prior to her husband’s transition, thinking of paperwork and processes, not emotions and expectations. They hit hard on that final day, whereas a slower release of excitement, fear, happiness and sorrow might have been more manageable.

“You cannot be solely focused on the service member,” Anna advised. “You have to take some time to think about how you feel. I hadn’t stopped and hadn’t said, ‘Okay, Anna, this is stressful for you.’”

Anna’s second recommendation: don’t rush anything.

The Army gives you a year, she says. For 365 days, they’ll store your household goods if you’re still figuring out where you want to go next — be it a forever home or a pitstop.

“‘Forever home’ feels very final for someone who has moved every two to three years of their life for the last almost two decades,” Anna says.

While a military spouse navigates a transition away from service, children often do as well. Remember them, and ask their thoughts, Anna urges. She turned to her and John’s daughter, Bella, 13, and their son, Jax, 9.

“If they’re old enough to have an opinion,” she says, “ask them what they want to do. There might be a place they absolutely loved, or they have fond memories or there might be things that are important to them that you can’t even think about as an adult. Our kids said, ‘We like it here. We have good friends here. We want to stay.’”

SpouseLink Ambassador Anna Larson livestreams on LinkedIn, YouTube and Facebook and blogs about issues affecting transitioning military spouses. Learn more about her and her fellow SpouseLink Ambassadors at SpouseLink.org.

For more resources for transitioning families, including life insurance, wealth management and mortgage, visit AAFMAA.com.

The Larson family is staying in Texas ... for now.

SpouseLink Ambassador Anna Larson and family

BORN TO BE BOLD

Country singer RaeLynn opens up about her journey from competing on ‘The Voice’ to juggling life as a Nashville star, new mom and military spouse.

BY ASHLEY LOSOYA

RaeLynn and her husband, Josh Davis, a Special Forces Green Beret.

Photo by Alysse Gafkjen

It’s been 10 years since RaeLynn first captured the hearts of country music fans on season two of “The Voice.” Since then, the 27-year-old has been churning out hits and creating a unique space for herself in Nashville.

She looks back at her time on the show fondly, noting that losing only made her stronger.

“Even though it was a success to be on the show, that little bit of letdown was very good for me because it made me want to work even harder,” she said.

Today, she’s riding a wave of success after releasing her latest album, “BAYTOWN.” It’s a mix of the trademark country sass she’s known for, as well as deep and vulnerable ballads. It’s her first album to be released under Round Here Records, the label created by Florida Georgia Line’s Brian Kelley and Tyler Hubbard. But that’s not her only tie to some of the biggest names in country music.

RaeLynn is currently preparing to go on a tour with Kane Brown that kicks off on May 19. While the preparation can be stressful, she said it feels good to be getting back to normal after the pandemic put touring on hold for so long.

“It’s good to see people are coming out to shows,” she acknowledged. “We need music; we need shows; we need people to be together.”

Motherhood and military life

Of all her recent achievements, nothing comes close to giving birth to her daughter, Daisy Rae, in September 2021.

“At the end of the day, having a child is genuinely the most incredible thing,” RaeLynn gushed. “It’s cooler than any record I’ve ever put out, it’s cooler than any awesome stage I’ve got to play or any award I’ve ever won.”

RaeLynn shares the joy of her first child with her husband, Josh Davis, a Special Forces Green Beret. But unlike most military spouses, she didn’t marry into the military. Her husband played Major League Baseball and worked in finance before deciding to enlist shortly after their wedding.

It was a decision that RaeLynn admits caught her off guard.

“Oh, it was a fight,” she laughed. “I did not know that it was in his heart.”

That said, RaeLynn was no stranger to the military lifestyle. Her brother, who she considers to be one of her best friends, served in the Army for more than a decade.

“It’s a sacrificial thing that no one can understand,” she said as she reflected back on deployments that kept him away from milestone moments.

In hindsight, RaeLynn recognizes that her husband probably would have enlisted sooner, but it just came down to timing.

“Watching him go through this and be a part of this process has been hard, but really rewarding,” RaeLynn said. “He’s really good at what he does, and the community of men and women I’ve met is a community unlike any other.”

It’s a community that she was always cut out for, even if she didn’t realize it at first.

“I’m gone a lot. I’m used to change,” she explained, and it’s a way of life she hopes her daughter will embrace.

“I want her to be on the go and able to adapt to any situation because you never know what’s going to be thrown our way.”

RaeLynn and Davis added a daughter, Daisy Rae, to their family in September 2021.

Baring her soul through songwriting

For RaeLynn, all of life’s twists, turns and surprises inspire a truly unique type of songwriting that feels more like storytelling.

She wants people to “go through a journey” when they hear her music, and that’s exactly what “BAYTOWN” reveals.

“That record is my heart,” she said. “I love to have a good time, but I’m also not going to shy away from hard subjects.”

Perhaps the most impactful song, “She Chose Me,” details the decision her mother faced when she became pregnant with RaeLynn.

“If it went the other way, nobody would have blamed her.

Think of all the small town talk it would have saved her.

She could have chosen one quick fix to get her out of one big mess …

But she chose me,” RaeLynn sings in the chorus.

The song has garnered thousands of shares on TikTok and Instagram from women using it as a soundtrack to tell their own stories.

“I wasn’t surprised because I really had a peace to put it out,” RaeLynn said of the song. “I was born to be bold and to say what I feel and do it in a way that God created me to do it, which is with love and kindness.”

Likewise, RaeLynn emphasized that her songs never come from a place of judgment. In fact, one of her upbeat tracks on the new album expresses that exact mentality. It’s appropriately titled “Judgin’ To Jesus.”

When all is said and done, RaeLynn simply hopes to encourage others to go that extra mile and show vulnerability.

“Nobody can take your story away from you,” she said. “Your story is your own.”

Enjoying the juggle of it all

As she writes this next chapter of her story, RaeLynn looks forward to all of the exciting changes ahead. She hasn’t quite figured out all of the logistics when it comes to hitting the road with a baby and a husband in the military, but that’s OK.

“I think it’s all about the attitude you have when you’re becoming a mom,” she explained. “I really do enjoy the juggle of it and figuring it out.”

It’s a sentiment that resonates with military families who face the same hurdles every day.

“Military spouses are so strong because they are used to the constant change,” RaeLynn said.

For her, part of embracing that uncertainty is knowing when to lean on your community.

“As women, I think we want to take it all on ourselves, but it’s OK to ask for help,” she added.

When it comes to her daughter, RaeLynn is encouraged by what she sees in the other families around her.

“Kids that come from military families are some of the strongest kids I’ve ever met,” she said. “They know that every day is precious, and every day looks different.”

And when every day is a little different, and the curveballs just keep coming, all you can do is keep moving forward.

“Day by day! That’s what we do,” RaeLynn laughed.

In times of hardship or high stress, she encourages fellow military spouses to

remember that —

“We’re all in this together. Lean on God and also the people he’s put around you. This world is not meant for us to take on alone. It’s meant for us to be able to have a community of people, and it’s OK to rely on that community.”

For more about RaeLynn, visit RaeLynn.com. For tour dates and ticket information, go to RaeLynn.com/tour

EMERGENCY MESSAGES

ASSIST MILITARY FAMILIES DURING CRISES

BY STEPHANIE FOX

A Red Cross worker answers a call at the Louisville, Kentucky, Hero Care Call Center.

Marine Cpl. Caide McLean was at work on base at Camp Lejeune, North Carolina, when he received a call from the Red Cross letting him know that a gas explosion had destroyed his childhood home in Embden, Maine, more than 1,000 miles away.

His mom, Tamara McLean, who was home at the time, was severely burned in the accident. During times of crisis, military families across the country, like the McLeans, turn to the Red Cross each day for help.

Lending a hand when military families need it most

More than 280 military families request assistance through the Red Cross Hero Care Network, a free, confidential service, each day.

If an emergency such as a serious illness, death or birth involving an immediate family member takes place, military families can initiate a request for an Emergency Communications Message. Once information has been gathered to craft the message, it is verified then delivered to the service member’s unit. While ultimately it is up to the discretion of a service member’s command as to whether leave is possible, the Hero Care Network provides all the information they can to help in the decision-making process and get the service member home if possible.

When disaster strikes

Caide says that the Red Cross was integral in getting him on the first flight home after the explosion.

“You see this stuff on TV and in movies, but you never imagine it happening to you,” he said. “When it happens, you’re mind-blown, but the Red Cross is there to help.”

When his mom woke up in her hospital room, being there, ready to hold her hand, meant everything to him and to his mom too.

“It was the best thing in my life — to wake up and have the people that mean the most to me, right by my side,” Tamara said. “You’ve lost everything. You’re scared. You’re hurt, and you wake up and see the most important things in your world. The loss, the injury, the rest of it just doesn’t matter. There are no words to describe how good that feels.”

A calming presence amid the storm of uncertainty

Hero Care Network volunteer JoAnne Barsenas recalled barely being able to decipher words through the sobs of one of her callers. The young woman, who had only been married for a few months, was beside herself with fear during her husband’s first deployment.

“I was on the phone with her for almost three hours,” Barsenas said.

“She was scared and alone, away from her family and friends. I set her up with a Navy family ombudsman, who can be a key resource, particularly during deployments,” she said.

Barsenas said a few weeks later, she called back saying that she was feeling much better.

Serving the family at home

Navy Petty Officer 3rd Class Kayla Beamon remembers the delivery of her Red Cross message while aboard a ship in the Persian Gulf. Her mother was undergoing surgery for cancer, and Beamon was needed to support her family back home.

“After the Red Cross notified my command, a swift process was put in place to get me off the ship in a timely manner to make it back home before my mom was out of surgery,” she said. “The smile on her face when she woke up and saw me was priceless.”

Initiating a call to the network Available 24 hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year, the Hero Care Network

allows families to initiate requests for Red Cross emergency assistance. To initiate a request, use: the online self-service tool, the Hero Care App or call 877-272-7337.

To be eligible for assistance, one must be:

• An active-duty member of the Army, Marines, Navy, Air Force, Coast Guard, National Guard or reserves.

• A civilian employed by or under contract to the DOD and stationed outside the continental United States,

• A cadet or midshipman at a service academy,

• An ROTC cadet on orders for training or

• A merchant marine aboard a U.S. naval ship.

In order to issue a message, you’ll provide specific details for the service member you’re trying to reach, including:

• Full legal name

• Rank/rating

• Branch of service

• Social security number or date of birth

• Military unit address

• For deployed service members: information about the deployed unit and home base unit

• Name and contact of the immediate family member experiencing the emergency

• Nature of the emergency

• Where the emergency can be confirmed, such as a hospital, funeral home, etc.

For more information on how the American Red Cross supports military families, visit redcross.org/saf. To initiate a request, visit www.redcross. org/get-help/military-families/ emergency-communication.html.

Navy Petty Officer 3rd Class Kayla Beamon was on a ship in the Persian Gulf when she learned her mother was undergoing surgery for cancer. Thanks to the Red Cross Hero Network, she was able to come home and be by her mother’s side.

“You see this stuff on TV and in movies, but you never imagine it happening to you. When it happens, you’re mindblown, but the Red Cross is there to help.”

—Marine Cpl. Caide McLean

HOW MUCH HAVE MILITARY SPOUSES CHANGED OVER THE DECADES?

BY JENNIFER BARNHILL

I can close my eyes and picture the first time I went to a base to get my military ID. But when I open them, I see a seasoned Navy spouse and advocate with quite a few added wrinkles to complement my more than 15 years of salty experience. I wonder if I were to start all over today, would my experiences be different?

Best thing about military life?

Hardest thing about military life?

Thankfully, I do not have to relive the seven deployments and PCS moves. Instead, I can turn to my dear friend Sarah Curtis, a social media content creator and new Air Force spouse. Despite only being a military spouse for two years, Curtis was recently named the Armed Forces Insurance 2022 Hurlburt Field Military Spouse of the Year for supporting young military spouses through her Military 101-style content on Instagram

Living in Japan and making new friends

Deployments and feeling alone to shoulder the weight.

Ask me how many reels I have created … one. I’m a geriatric millennial who lived in Japan before the era of smartphones. I remember having to pick up printed maps from the MWR office a decade ago before hopping on a train to my desired destination. I met friends in real life.

Meeting new friends

Not feeling seen or valued.

Curtis became a military spouse during COVID, forced to only connect virtually. I’m an extrovert and like to get information about military life by emailing friends or crowdsourcing, but Curtis, an introvert, heads to Google, starting with broad search terms and hoping the algorithms guide her to the right resources.

Comparing our first impressions of military life

After a 13-hour journey, and with 10 bags between us, my husband and I finally landed at Japan’s Narita airport and were met at the gate with a handwritten sign held by my husband’s sponsor that read “Barnhill.”

“Do you want to go to Tokyo?” he asked. After shooting my husband an “I will kill you” glance, I said that I would prefer to go to the Navy Lodge. Three hours later we were greeted by a basket full of goodies provided by our new community. New friends took us to restaurants, showed us how to use the train and taught us basic Japanese. They were framily.

Initial impressions were decidedly different for Curtis.

“I could not wrap my head around it,” she said about her first memories of military life as she prepared to PCS to Florida. Prior to getting married to her airman, her only connection to the military was her uncle, who served in the Army. So, when her husband brought home a stack of paperwork, his orders, and said that he needed to move her to Florida, get her an ID, insurance, etc., she was overwhelmed, saying “[everything] changed from that moment on.” Instead of giving up, Curtis decided to make it easier for other new spouses by creating content just for them.

Despite the decades between us, Curtis and I both agree, aside from the obvious separation from loved ones, the hardest part about being “military-connected” but not in the military is feeling unseen. For Curtis, this lack of visibility is connected to her newness.

“It’s like my voice isn’t worth hearing because

Since 1879, Navy Mutual has been trusted by military families to be there during their times of greatest need. Our nation counts on the military. You can count on us. Our life insurance products feature no active duty service restrictions and we provide unmatched beneficiary services to ensure you have only one call to make.

I’m new,” she shared.

Sadly, even with 15 years’ worth of experience, that feeling of being unseen is felt by both new and seasoned spouses. I feel it when I see military spouses saying “Happy Military Spouse Appreciation Day” each May, having to remind their service members that it is in fact an official day designated by President Ronald Regan in 1984.

Military spouses, young and old, serve by supporting their service member and the homefront. It is irrelevant if they are on day

one or day 5,000. Over the past 15 years, communication methods have changed and support programs have improved, but other social networks have faded. We as individuals evolve at pace with society and hope that the systems in place to support us can keep up. Connect

Instagram @weservetoo

Connect with Curtis on Instagram @amilitarywifeslife

RETIRING FROM SERVICE?

CONTENT PROVIDED BY BENEFEDS

The U.S. Office of Personnel Management (OPM) is proud to welcome retiring members of the uniformed services to the Federal Employees Dental and Vision Insurance Program (FEDVIP).

Sponsored by OPM, FEDVIP is a voluntary, enrollee-pay-all dental and vision insurance program. It replaced the former TRICARE Retiree Dental Program (TRDP). In general, retired uniformed service members, their families and survivors are eligible for FEDVIP dental coverage and, if enrolled in a TRICARE health plan, FEDVIP vision coverage. Please note: Opportunities to enroll outside of open season are limited.

Retiring uniformed service members are considered newly eligible for FEDVIP. This includes retired reserve members who are age 60 and older and under age 60 (gray area reservists) not yet receiving retired pay.

If you’re retiring from the uniformed services, you have a 91-day enrollment window to

enroll in a FEDVIP dental and/or vision plan. You may enroll between 31 days prior to your military retirement date and 60 days following. It’s important to remember, enrollment is not automatic. If you choose to enroll in FEDVIP, you must enroll prior to your military retirement date to prevent a gap in dental coverage between your active-duty or reserve dental plan and your FEDVIP plan. If you do not enroll within 60 days from your retirement date, you must wait until the next open season.

FEDVIP is popular among the more than 3.5 million people already enrolled in the program, giving the program high marks for quality and value. With 12 dental and 5 vision carriers to choose from, FEDVIP offers great flexibility when selecting the right coverage for you and your family, such as:

• regional dental plans, as well as nationwide dental and vision plans with international coverage

• most plans feature both high and standard options

• a choice between three enrollment types: self, self plus one or self and family

To familiarize yourself with the program, explore BENEFEDS.com/military BENEFEDS is the secure online portal to enroll in FEDVIP, to research FEDVIP’s current list of carriers and plans and use the plan comparison tool to view rates, benefits and coverage information.

Don’t miss this opportunity! Consider including the Federal Employees Dental and Vision Insurance Program (FEDVIP) in your retirement plan today.

BENEFEDS is administered by Long Term Care Partners, LLC, with oversight by the U.S. Office of Personnel Management.

See ad on page 23 >

COAST GUARD LEADS COLD WATER ICE DIVING TRAINING IN MINNESOTA

BY ELIZABETH ASLAKSON

The Coast Guard’s Cold Water Ice Diving (CWID) joint-service course will now occur in the Arctic environment of Camp Ripley, Minnesota.

“Because if you can operate in Minnesota in the dead of winter — you can operate anywhere,” said Chief Warrant Officer Sean Eversole, a Coast Guard instructor, regarding the high-risk training held at the National Guard facility for the first time earlier this year.

Though the Department of Defense recently emphasized its Arctic Strategy because of threats from Russia and China, CWID exercises are not new for the military.

CWID has occurred for decades among the service branches, but when a fatal accident involving two divers occurred in 2006, the Coast Guard took charge of the training, explained Coast Guard Petty Officer 1st Class Joshua Bredesen, lead CWID instructor.

Coast Guard Petty Officer 2nd Class Ryan McManus treading water at CWID training.

Coast Guard Petty Officer 1st Class Joshua Bredesen, a CWID instructor, with student Coast Guard Petty Officer 2nd Class Ryan McManus.

Photos by Petty Officer 3rd Class Jessica Fontenette.

Not only has the Coast Guard trained divers since World War II, but divers have also honed their CWID skills for rescue missions and defending America’s borders in the most severe conditions. In addition, they protect maritime environments in extreme climates, like supporting summer rotations to the McMurdo Station, a research station in Antarctica.

At first, bases in Seattle, Washington, and British Columbia hosted CWID, but the COVID-19 pandemic forced the divers to look elsewhere. Camp Ripley met the criteria. In fact, the Minnesota grounds proved so ideal, they will now continue to host CWID, Eversole and Bredesen both said.

The instructors also explained that because many divers are stationed in warmer climates, such as the USCG Special Missions Training Center at Camp Lejeune, North Carolina, or the Naval Diving and Salvage Training Center in Panama City, Florida, CWID training is a necessity for preparedness.

The 12 Coast Guardsmen, two Navy divers and two Army divers participating this year also followed “a crawl, walk, run” approach to allow for acclimation, according to Bredesen.

First, divers familiarized themselves with equipment outfitted for the extreme temperatures and practiced emergency procedures in a controlled dive tank near the facility at the Minnesota School of Diving Inc. in Brainerd.

Next, students went on to Ripley’s frozen Ferrell Lake, where they learned to assess ice thickness, determine if it’s safe to work on and cut entry and exit holes.

Divers then set up tents as they operated in and out of 35-degree water with air temperatures dipping below 40 degrees with

wind chills. Even with temperatures above freezing in the enclosed space, the team had to clear ice from the entry and exit holes every hour.

After equipment divers double-checked equipment for safety, they submerged for 20 minutes at a time so they could adapt to maneuvering under the ice in multiple layers.

In subsequent dives, students advanced to performing tasks that tested dexterity and fine motor skills, such as using wrenches to remove nuts from bolts before egressing through an emergency hole, with the high risk of becoming lost under the ice and murky waters.

Coast Guard Petty Officer 2nd Class Casey Connors, a student, detailed the experience. He described dressing in a layering system including thermal wear, wool socks, beanies and gloves before getting into a dry suit and scuba gear, creating the tightest sealing system possible.

Connor explained what it was like being squeezed by the change of pressure when submerged underwater in the frigid lake.

“It’s scary and beautiful at the same time,” he said, especially “when diving under the ice in Minnesota, knowing there’s 15 inches of ice above you … the view is like looking through a glass from underwater.”

He reiterated that equipment is more prone to failure in extreme temperatures, including when they experienced an 80-degree change from one day to the next during the course.

But CWID training teaches students “how to deal with potential failures and how not to panic,” he stated, and the “point of the course is to also build divers’ confidence.”

Connor also emphasized that despite the inherent dangers of diving and participating in hazardous training, everyone wants the opportunity to dive.

“Even if it doesn’t sound like the greatest job, everyone raises their hand,” he said.

The reason being, the camaraderie between the tight-knit group of 60 divers makes “being part of the Coast Guard dive family one of the greatest jobs you can get in this world,” he added.

Coast Guard Chief Petty Officer Christopher Tull inspects holes in a dive site.

Photos by Petty Officer 3rd Class Gregory Schell.

AUTHOR

takes on threat of global war in two

UPCOMING

NOVELS

BY KATE LEWIS

Don Bentley has had one heck of a career — several of them, in fact. He spent 10 years as an Army Apache pilot, followed by time with the FBI as a special agent and SWAT team member. Now, he’s the author of a successful line of military thrillers and was hand-selected as the successor for Tom Clancy’s Jack Ryan, Jr. novels.

And he’s just getting started.

“What world is this?” Bentley laughs as he retells the moment he first typed in the legendary name Jack Ryan into his computer. “A good part of success is showing up, and I was fortunate enough that I got the chance to show up.”

This month, Bentley is back in bookstores with “Hostile Intent,” the third installment in his popular action series that follows quick-witted Defense Intelligence Agency operative Matt Drake as he winds up in ever more fraught global hotspots, tasked with saving the world.

In a fast-paced plot that might have been pulled straight from international front pages, this time Drake faces down Russians during an invasion of Ukraine, under the threatening shadow of nuclear war.

Backed by extensive research on Putin’s false-flag operations and history of aggressions, when Bentley wrote “Hostile Intent,” he set out to answer two questions: “If he was going to invade Ukraine, how would he do it?” and “When the rubber meets the road, who is willing to actually stand on the line or not?” The resulting novel, out now, is uncannily familiar to the horrors that became a reality in Ukraine at the end of February and the people who defend against them.

Bentley draws upon his own military and FBI experiences for his novels, which infuse his writing with gritty realism. As an FBI special agent, he was tasked with recruiting and running assets, a crucial skill he passed on to Drake in his books.

“You have to be very good at building relationships,” he explained. “Getting to know not just what they say they want, but what is their deeper motivation? What do they need that you can provide so that they’ll agree to work for you?”

During his time in the Army, Bentley was stationed around the globe, from Texas to South Korea to Germany, and deployed as a troop commander to Afghanistan, where he was awarded the Bronze Star Medal and the Air Medal with “V” device for valor. Each locale figures prominently in his work.

“It is hard to have a bad day when you get to fly an Apache,” he said of his time in the military. He laughs again. “It’s one of the best jobs in the world. It’s hard to believe they pay you to do this.”

One of the biggest unexpected benefits of military life for Bentley and his growing family, however, was developing strong friendships.

“People who are friends become your family, even more so when you’re stationed overseas,” he says, recounting times military friends loaned him their cars and even their homes. “Those friendships become so much more than what they would be in the civilian world over such a shorter period of time.”

“Hostile Intent” is dedicated to two of those friends — his next-door neighbors in Germany, Army Capt. Mark A. Garner and Nickayla Myers-Garner.

“We had them over for dinner all the time,” he recalled of the couple, who were hometown sweethearts. “They’d been married just a couple years.”

< See article on page 18

As Bentley wrapped up his overseas tour and moved back to the U.S., Garner was just beginning his in the infantry. A year later, Garner was deployed to Afghanistan and killed in an IED attack . Bentley was a world away, watching Myers-Garner pick up the pieces and move forward with grace and poise. She began offering resiliency and grief counseling workshops for other spouses, turning her horrific heartbreak into a tangible way to help others. Bentley was profoundly moved by the couple’s sacrifice and Myers-Garner’s continued service.

“It’s just a slice of what the men and women who serve in the military are,” Bentley said.

“Hostile Intent,” the latest Matt Drake thriller, is available now. Bentley’s next novel for the Tom Clancy universe, “Zero Hour,” releases in June 2022. Keep up with Bentley at DonBentleyBooks.com.

NEVER FORGOTTEN

BY PEYTON H. ROBERTS

Initiative invites military families to honor fallen service members Memorial Day weekend

The rain wasn’t ideal. But Marine veteran Chad Johnson recalls the dreary weather was apropos for the occasion.

“It was cloudy. It was overcast. It was rainy. It was not a pleasant day,” Johnson said. “But personally, as a military veteran, that’s how I felt inside.”

Last May, Johnson, along with his wife and son, joined hundreds of volunteers at Arlington National Cemetery to participate in The Honor Project, a new initiative spearheaded by the Travis Manion Foundation (TMF) that recruits volunteers to visit the gravesites of fallen service members on behalf of family and friends who cannot be present themselves.

A former combat engineer who now serves as TMF’s chapter lead in Raleigh, North Carolina, Johnson signed up for The Honor Project as soon as he heard about it.

“I couldn’t think of a better way to memorialize our fallen service members than to go to Arlington and play a small part in making sure they’re not forgotten,” he said.

For Johnson, who served during the initial invasion of Iraq in 2003, the visit to Arlington was especially meaningful with his family by his side.

“My son wasn’t born until many years after I left the Marine Corps,” he said, “so he never knew me when I was active duty.”

Walking past row after row of perfectly aligned headstones, Johnson recalls the powerful conversations he had with his son, who was 15 at the time.

“Every one of these stones represents a person who was once on this earth who is no longer here,” Johnson explained. “When someone asks you what the cost of freedom is, this is it.”

Army spouse Tina Saari, senior director of TMF’s National Engagement Programs, shares The Honor Project’s grassroots beginnings.

“It started in 2020 during COVID when travel was difficult and people were not able to visit their loved ones interred at Arlington,” Saari said.

On Memorial Day 2020, TMF volunteer Emily Domenech went to Arlington to pay respects at a family member’s gravesite. Due to the pandemic restrictions in place at the time, only those with a family pass could enter the historic grounds.

Noticing how empty the cemetery was, Domenech posted on Twitter, “Does anyone have buddies buried in Arlington who they would like visited today? Since only family members are allowed in, I would be honored to pay respects on your behalf … ”

The tweet went viral, and Domenech received a flood of requests to visit loved ones interred there. Recognizing the values of TMF, which was founded to continue the legacy of a Marine killed in Iraq, Domenech wanted to keep the movement going. After collaborating with TMF leadership, The Honor Project was born.

During the next few weeks, surviving family and battle buddies can submit names and gravesites of loved ones interred at participating cemeteries through TMF’s website. The week of Memorial Day, TMF will mobilize volunteers to lay a handmade, metal flag of valor at each site and take pictures to share with family members and battle buddies.

“Something I always hear from families of the fallen is they’re so afraid their hero will be forgotten,” Saari said. “It’s so important to

these families to make sure we’re saying their hero’s name and honoring them. This is one way we can do that.”

Last Memorial Day weekend, hundreds of military families, veterans, service members, community members and families of the fallen volunteered to say names, take pictures and lay plaques at some 4,000 service members’ gravesites.

This year, the program is expanding beyond Arlington to include additional cemeteries throughout the country. Locations and opportunities to get involved nationwide will be announced on TMF’s website.

For Johnson, who plans to return to Arlington at the end of May, volunteering with The Honor Project left a lasting impression.

“These veterans paved the way for our future and protected our way of life at the ultimate cost,” he said. “It’s our obligation and responsibility to their surviving family members to ensure the service and sacrifice of their loved ones are never forgotten.”

For more information about volunteering with The Honor Project or submitting the name of a service member, visit www.travismanion.org/ events/thehonorproject.

“It’s so important to these families to make sure we’re saying their hero’s name and honoring them.”

– Army spouse Tina Saari

Spouses get a chance to thrive in STEM as instructors with Rosie Riveters

BY NIKKI DAVIDSON

For a long time, Army spouse Alexandria Robinson made playful jokes about her husband’s career in the Geospatial Intelligence field. The job uses advanced radar technology, aerial imagery and electronic sensors to analyze battle areas and support combat operations.

“It’s a technical field so I would always tease him and say, ‘Oh, that’s kind of nerdy,’” remembered Robinson. The mother of six had gotten a college degree in nursing. Still, she was surprised when she couldn’t stop asking her husband questions about what he was learning in his new GEOINT classes with American Military University.

“Finally, he said, ‘You know, you seem like you have a real interest in this, you could go

to school for this too,’” Robinson recalled. She decided to look into the classes and got hooked on Lidar, Light Detecting and Ranging technology.

“I was in awe. I thought it was the coolest thing in my life,” she said. “And I remember calling my husband, and I was like ‘Oh my goodness, this is just so cool,’ and he just smirked and said he’d been telling me that for a decade now.”

A pilot program sponsored by Blue Star Families and Boeing employs military spouses to teach Rosie Riveters STEM programming to young girls at Fort Belvoir.

Recently she got an opportunity to translate her new calling into a paying job. Rosie Riveters, a nonprofit that hosts science, technology, engineering and mathematics programming for young girls, was recruiting military spouses with STEM education to teach a new pilot program near Washington D.C. at Fort Belvoir. Robinson was hired as an instructor, and now she shares her passion with young military girls in a USO classroom.

“Our girls have a really great time. Last week we had a little bit of a surprise; we accidentally made a volcano,” laughed Robinson.

The extracurricular STEM program, Rosie Riveters, was the dream of the group’s executive director, Brittany Greer, who grew up with a poster of the WWII-era icon on her bedroom wall.

She started the nonprofit to get preschool to middle school girls engaged with STEM activities, hoping the young memories may bridge the gender gap in the field one day. According to Rosie Riveters, in 2019 women made up only 27% of the science and engineering workforce in the U.S.

“What we want them to do is know that with the confidence in themselves, they can go into any field and innovate, change and participate

in it,” said Greer. “The world of possibilities in front of them is huge.”

Blue Star Families saw Rosie Riveters as a chance to create educational programming for female military children, while also providing jobs as instructors to military spouses who faced employment barriers due to their active-duty lifestyle. According to the 2021 Blue Star Families’ annual Military Family Lifestyle Survey, military spouse under- and unemployment are top issues for families in active-duty service.

The pilot program launched with a sponsorship from Blue Star Families and Boeing last spring at Fort Belvoir. Additional instructors have been hired to expand the program to both Joint Base Andrews in Maryland and the Mayport USO Jacksonville, Florida, at the end of April.

“I’ve never met more human beings with Ph.D.s in my life than in the military spouses that I’ve interacted with,” said Greer. “It’s just unbelievable how qualified and incredible they are. They are such an amazing group of people.”

Ultimately, Rosie Riveters hopes instructors will be able to stick with the program even through deployments or after a PCS.

“The goal is they can move into their new location and let us know when they’re settled. Then we would work with Blue Star and the chapter closest to the area they’re located, discuss work opportunities in that region, and then work through neutral partners, so the programs are completely free of charge to families,” said Greer.

Robinson said the opportunity to teach young girls STEM is a dream come true for military spouses, whose careers are often challenged by the needs of an active-duty lifestyle. When the Army sent her husband on deployment, she assumed she’d have to quit her instructor role due to the challenges of serving as a single parent to six kids. She was surprised when program leaders offered to sponsor her child care so she could continue teaching classes.

“That’s the difference right there between talking the talk and walking the walk,” said Robinson. “That was a very unexpected offer, and I don’t think it’s common for organizations to go to that length of actually supporting military spouses.”

Greer said the nonprofit plans to pay for benefits like child care through corporate sponsorships. She feels the value of exposing both spouses and military kids to STEM far outweighs the cost of fixing employment challenges.

“We’re really empowering our participants and quite frankly bringing the innovators that we want in STEM fields to the table,” said Greer.

Learn more about Rosie Riveters at www.RosieRiveters.com/

Girls aged 4-14 participate in science, technology, mathematics and engineering activities through the Rosie Riveters program.

WARDROBE REBOOT

MARINE SPOUSE CONQUERS CLOTHING MAKEOVERS ON SOCIAL MEDIA

BY NIKKI DAVIDSON

Caitlin Trantham hunched over her kitchen stove and hoped her latest recipe would finally be everything she dreamed of. After a series of mishaps, the steaming mixture marked her fourth attempt at perfection. She resembled a mad scientist, surrounded by erratically placed tinfoil, attempting not to spill a single drop of the boiling liquid onto the kitchen counter inside military housing.

The pot didn’t hold a stew or lunch; instead, a fluffy, beaded, 90s-era wedding dress purchased from Goodwill floated inside. Serving as a fairy godmother of sorts, Trantham was determined to turn the discarded and forgotten frock into something new. She planned to show off the transformation at an upcoming Marine Corps Ball. When she removed the sparkly garment from the now-crimson liquid dye, it was finally flawless.

“The project was quite a journey. It was hard to do. At the end of the day, I probably would have been better off buying a dress,” laughed Trantham, who also used her sewing machine to modify the dress to a more flattering and modern shape. “But I wanted to make it so bad.”

Caitlin Trantham transformed an old wedding dress into a crimson Marine Corps Ball gown. The videos she shared on TikTok of the process received more than 1 million views.

As many military families know, sometimes the clock strikes midnight when you least expect it. Trantham’s husband, a Marine first sergeant, ended up having to deploy earlier than expected, and she didn’t get to go to the ball after all. But that didn’t mean the dress didn’t turn heads. More than 1 million people viewed the transformation video series she shared of her project.

The road to social media success Trantham is the mastermind behind the social media account Cait Conquers, which chronicles her extraordinary transformations of discarded and outdated dresses and fabric she finds at thrift stores. She’s been making videos consistently for about three years and has attracted nearly 1 million followers on TikTok and 300,000 on Instagram. Her reach has even helped her win a collaboration deal with Disney.

The mother of three, whose family is currently stationed in Hawaii, never expected to be a social media star for her sewing talents. Her mother loved sewing, but Trantham found it “boring” until recently.

“My mom bought me a sewing machine, but it sat in the box for two years,” said Trantham, who initially took the machine out of the box to make a quilt. “She really wanted me to stop asking her to sew things for me.”

Clothing transformations came a little later when she dreamed of owning a vintage wardrobe but didn’t have the funds to purchase the items at pricey consignment stores.

“I was like, ‘Maybe I can find things in the thrift store that are close and modify them,” she remembered, adding that her first project was raising the hem of a 90s Dressbarn garment into a more suitable retro length. “That was my first project, and I got a good response from my friends, so I did another one.”

Finding a calling of her own Trantham has since collected more than 20 million likes on her short TikTok transformation videos, repurposing everything from old garments to curtains and bedsheets. She’s even converted her husband’s retired uniforms into teddy bears, so the family feels closer to him while he’s away. She created her social media platform name, Cait Conquers, the day he deployed for six months.

“To motivate and convince myself that I could conquer any challenge life brought me,” she said.

But she’s made it a point to make her husband’s career just a footnote in her

content. She made a choice early on to make the platform all her own.

“It’s really hard to find your identity outside of it when you’re so thick into the military community,” she added. “A lot of people lose themselves. I’m glad that I was able to kind of carve my own path.”

Along the way, she hopes to inspire others to repurpose before buying new. According to data from the 2019 Global Wellness Summit, clothing production is the second-largest source of water pollution, responsible for roughly 10% of all carbon emissions. The U.S. Environmental Protection Agency estimates that clothing waste makes up 7.7% of the municipal solid waste in landfills.

Trantham added that even people without a

sewing machine should take a second look at their closet and transform something old into a new garment with dye or no-sew hem tape.

“We are drowning in clothing waste,” Trantham said. “There are so many clothes out in the world that if I can inspire just a handful of people to go get them and reuse them and make something new, I’d be so happy.”

In the meantime, she continues to dye and sew her own heart out while crossing her fingers that next year, she’ll finally be able to wear the crimson beaded gown to the Marine Corps Ball.

A teddy bear Caitlin Trantham created with fabric from her husband’s old Marine uniform.

Q&A WITH ULTRARUNNER ALYSSA AMOS CLARK

BY MELISSA M. STEWART

When pandemic lockdowns hit hard a few years ago, Navy spouse Alyssa Amos Clark wasn’t sure how she’d spend her time in Naples, Italy, where her husband was stationed. Never one to settle for boredom, she started doing what she says always creates “the best version of myself”— running. A treadmill marathon one day turned into 95 consecutive marathons in 95 days and scored her a place in the Guinness World Records. We managed to catch up with Clark, who calls herself an “endurance adventurer” to find out what keeps her motivated and what she’s up to now.

What was something important you did to accomplish this feat?

Making manageable parts that will then create the whole. One of the biggest things is what I call mental cheerleading, where you celebrate your accomplishments, so instead of saying, ‘Oh my gosh, I have 30 miles left,’ say, ‘Wow, good job. You did 30 miles. Yeah, you can do this. You’re over halfway.’

After you realized you were on your way to breaking the record, did you ever want to quit?

Far less than expected. I would say only about three or four times. One big challenge was when we were PCSing internationally during a pandemic. At one point, when we were traveling on a military cargo plane, I ran a marathon in the middle of the night during a layover in Rothenstein, Germany.

Why did you take on this challenge?

I had never thought about doing the marathons. I actually didn’t even know I was going to do it until I woke up and thought I’d run 14 miles or so, and it just kept going. So really, I think it was such a gift, because every marathon that I finished, none of them were guaranteed or expected.

You now have a coach and sponsors on top of your job as an English teacher. What’s next?

How has the military lifestyle affected your goals as an endurance athlete?

With all of these moves, which have presented incredible opportunities, running has been the constant in my life. It’s been the friend that I get to keep when we PCS. And that’s allowed me to also meet new people in the communities that we moved to. I am a professional athlete now, too. So, it is a career that can move with me as well.

I have full-time training every day also, so it’s busy. This morning I was up for a 12-mile track workout. I have a full race schedule, with a 240-miler in October and a few races over in France.

Clark also plans to publish a book this fall. Follow her online at www.AlyssaClarkRuns.com and on Instagram @theory_in_motion.