DEFYING THE ODDS Newsletter DEFYING... DEBT UNEMPLOYMENT SICKNESS
POVERTY
FAILURE
DEATH ABUSE BULLYING
Volume 1, Issue 1
Brought to you by: Defying Mental Illness—Put a full stop
DEFYING THE ODDS NEWSLETTER
Inside this issue Defying the Odds ........................ 3 Interview on abuse ..................... 3 Interview on abuse cont’d .......... 4 Bullying ....................................... 5 Defying Mental Illness Supplement …………………………………………….6-8 Events……………………………………….8
Special points of interest Defying the Odds - what it takes Interview with Anne on overcoming abuse
From The Editor
Letter to the Editor Email your questions and comments to :
Welcome to the launch of our brand new and exciting edition of DEFYING THE ODDS newsletter (plus the DEFYING MENTAL ILLNESS supplement). I am so excited about this newsletter. It is bold, it is inspirational and motivating…and the pages are full of hope.
defyingtheodds@live.co.uk
We have a range of outstanding contributors with articles on various pressing or even controversial issues in life. Issues that everyday people face in life; issues people are challenged with but may be shy to talk about or may have issues dealing with. This newsletter is informative, uplifting and loaded. There are testimonies and stories from those who defied the odds that will encourage you not to give up. Keep pressing on!
New Website Coming Soon….
The Defying Mental Illness supplement has dared to venture where others have not and most often will not. We talk openly and boldly about mental health issues…and yes we talk about defying it too! This launch edition we have an expose on bullying. Bullying affects so many and can have serious psychological effects too. We will look at what bullying is all about and what steps one can take. We also have an amazing interview with an inspiring lady , Anne, who shares with us how she overcame years of all manner of abuse conceivable – physical, domestic and so on. She talks on the power of forgiveness and how it brought healing and release from many years of anger, bitterness and hurt. A must read article! In our supplement DEFYING MENTAL ILLNESS, we will hear inspiring words from the author of MEDITATIONS AND CONFESSIONS series . He gives an expose on the power of confessions that will be a tremendous blessing to you in your journey with overcoming the dreadfulness of mental illness and other storms of life. I also share on the stigma associated with mental illness in this section. I will leave you with this; if you were given 1 in a million chance of winning, why not make up your mind to be the 1? That is the mindset of the one who defies the odds! Welcome on board! Zoe A. Onah—Editor
www.defyingmentalillness.com
Matters Arising:
Interview with Anne on her story of abuse DTO: Anne, you are one incredible and inspirational lady. You have an amazing story. It however all started having suffered many years of abuse. Tell us a little about your story.
Unforgiveness is a prison especially to those who have been abused
Anne: Thank you for this opportunity. I also thank The Almighty God who sustained me all along during my period of hopelessness. Oh my story. Praise God! It is about what I went through my life as a teenager and as a wife. I lived years of abuse and I thought there was no way out for me. I cried out in pain, hurt, rejection and hate. I did not enjoy my teen years and even adulthood, carrying a broken heart. I lost my confidence and my self esteem. I lived in fear. My heart was sore. I was accused also of stealing my husband’s money and I became deathly ill as the result of the accusation and the humiliation it brought. I refused to forgive those who hurt me. I continued my life as a Muslim until I met the Lord through another experience. Even though I met the Lord, I did not learn to know Him. Things (Continued
“To defy the odds is to do something, resist or withstand that which seemed unlikely or impossible. There is a ‘dare’ involved”.
Defying The Odds—what it takes by Zoe A. Onah Dictionary.com defines DEFY as: 1. to challenge the power of; resist boldly or openly: to defy parental authority. 2. to offer effective resistance to: a fort that defies attack. 3. to challenge (a person) to do something deemed impossible: They defied him to dive off the bridge. 4. to challenge to a combat or contest. One word that is consistent above is the word, ‘challenge’. That tells us something. A challenge usually connotes a fight or a test. To defy the odds is to do something, resist or withstand that which seemed unlikely or impossible. There is a ‘dare’ involved. Definition 2 says effective resistance. I like the word ‘effective’. That means that there must be success at the end. To defy the odds, here are 3 things to consider:
Defying the Odds. One man’s struggle and victory over mental illness and his wife whose trust in God never failed
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1. Vision. A manufacturer must first see his product before he can make it. You possess what you see. BEFORE Joshua conquered Jericho, God said to him in Joshua 6:2 “SEE, I have given you Jericho”. 2. Words. Words come from our thoughts. Thoughts are our imaginations, our visions, our meditations, what we have been brooding over. Hearing the negative statistics day in and day out will affect you whether you think so or not. Luke 6:45 says out of the abundance of your heart, the mouth speaks. (……..Continued on Page 4)
They defied the odds
“When you have exhausted all possibilities, remember this… you haven’t!” Thomas Edison
Thomas Edison, the last of 7 children, came from a poor home. His teacher even called him ‘addled’ . Addled means rotten, unable to think. He also had hearing difficulties which grew worse as he got older. Even with these challenges, Edison was not deterred in life. Edison defied the odds and became one of the greatest inventors in History...and was also a businessman! He has over 1000 patents to his name. He invented
the first incandescent light that would last and was practical. After several failed attempts, he said, I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work! A lesson in never giving up!
Matters Arising ...Continued from Page 3 on page 3)changed for the best but I was still holding grudges and nothing was moving right in my life. I did not know that I closed doors of opportunities through unforgiveness. One day, my Pastor was preaching about unforgiveness and what it does in our lives. I received revelation that day. I was delivered through the power of the Holy Spirit. I was free. My life changed that day. This is my story. DTO: How did you find it possible to forgive your abusers? Anne: I could not have forgiven them if I did not hear about the effect of unforgiveness in my life. I thought it was right to keep on living a life of not forgiving those who hurt you. The forgiveness came after I have heard about the joy we have when we forgive those who hurt us. I was able to forgive my abusers when I became free in my heart. It was easy by the Word of God. I could not have forgiven them if I did not act upon the Word. DTO: That is incredible. And your story continues. Many years later you had a divine encounter and that also marked another turning point in your life. Out of that experience came the vision of THE POWER OF THE PROMISE, a book you are currently writing. What is the power of the promise? Anne: I had a dream and the Lord gave me a title of the book I had been writing few years prior. The title was THE POWER OF THE PROMISE….Actually, I have a passion writing. Throughout the time of my suffering I had a notebook where I poured my words. The notebook was a haven for me. I have never stopped writing. The Power of the Promise is classic story of my life, talking about my suffering and how the Lord reminded me of my promises made when I cried to him. As a Muslim lady then, the Lord followed me closely even then. He loved me when I did not even know Him. His promises to be with me never failed. That is the power of the promise. DTO: Today, you are reaching out to other abused ladies and to Muslim ladies. Your mess has become a message. Incredible. What can you say to someone in a similar situation to you? A final word. Anne: There are a lot of things to learn in your walk with the Lord. It will uplift your spirit to understand His will in your life. God can mend our broken heart by his Word and make us whole and happy again. It doesn't matter who you are, God is faithful. We must reign in life. For someone living the same situation, I will tell them to believe that the only key to be free is by forgiving those who hurt you. You cannot have tests in life without testimonies. Let go! Do not keep quiet and suffer alone. I was wrong for being quiet until the Word came to break the vase of bondage. You are not alone. Voice it out . You must forgive. I forgave my abusers including my ex husband. You can be free if you learn how to forgive those who hurt you the most. But you don't keep silent about it. Talk to someone who can help. You can have your life back. It is possible. I am happy today and doing great things. Speak, forgive and be free, free!
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About Samson Adeyemi Samson is a 23 year old who has inspired thousands of other young people and parents across the globe. He is a renowned motivational speaker and mentor. His unique approach in using illustrations and helping people make rapid changes and progress has transformed a lot of lives. Samson has been a leader of young people for over 7 years.
Some of his accomplishments include: Youth MP for Lewisham Borough in the UK Youth Parliament for 2 years.
Has spoken at the House of Lords and at the House of Commons. Expert on Youth related issues on Television including the BBC.
Former Youth Advisor for London Youth.
Judge on National Crimebeat Awards Project Manager of several Youth motivational events in London
Bullying by Samson Adeyemi Bullying is defined according to www.stopbullying.gov as an “unwanted, aggressive behaviour amongst people that involves a real or perceived power imbalance. The behaviour is repeated, or has the potential to be repeated, over time.” Different things result in bullying. There are 3 main types of bullying. They include: physical bullying, mental bullying and emotional bullying. Let’s focus on some of the solutions: Stopping it on the spot: When a bully is stopped whilst in the act, it is more effective. This sends a strong message to both the bully and those watching that such act is totally inappropriate. Supporting those involved: Whether it’s the victim, the bully or the observers. Some bullies need help themselves. For whatever reason they bully others, they need to receive guidance and pointed in the right direction to help them stop such act. Do not be a bystander: Watching bullying and doing nothing about it encourages the bully to carry on as he/she believes they now have an audience that see it but can do nothing about what they see. I prefer preventive measures than
curative ones. As they say, it’s better to be safe than sorry. Some of the preventive measures include: Setting up focus groups to look into anti-bullying policies in our schools and ensuring that these policies are strong enough and strictly adhered to. Support networks formed by previous victims of bullying. They can air their thoughts on how those experiencing bullying now can come out of it. Using social media to campaign against bullying. Using creative art such as drama, dance, spoken word, motivational speaking etc. to tackle bullying. Young people can form creative art groups, act out scenarios and propose solutions through their acts. Through entertainment, they still send out a strong message. Observers of bullying should not be bothered about being called a ‘snitch’: Report bullying when you see one. If you don’t report it soon enough, chances are that it may affect someone dear to you.
DEFYING THE ODDS...CONT’D (from page 3) You need to hear words that will propel you. You need to hear the good news. The testimonies. Revelation 12:11 says we overcome by testimonies. The testimonies we hear, the words we speak make a difference. 3. Tenacity. You cannot afford to give up. The Bible admonishes us not to give up. Jesus taught His disciples in Luke 18:1 to pray and not give up. Tenacity sees the end of the journey irrespective of the pot holes and dangers. That is why your vision is so important. God gave Abraham a picture, the stars as representation of the kids he would have. Abraham maintained this vision throughout the years even when it seemed it would never happen. In our next issue, we will look at the mindset of an overcomer over a survivor in winning the challenges of life, in defying the odds.
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Till then, remember you are that 1 in a million!
DEFYING MENTAL ILLNESS SUPPLEMENT
In this Supplement:
Power of Confessions
Stigma of mental illness
About Defying Mental Illness
DEFYING MENTAL ILLNESS SUPPLEMENT Power of Confessions by E. Onah When a Christian talks about making confessions, they are talking about saying the same things that God says about them. A confession is an acknowledgement or declaration. It is speaking what God says about you not just thinking it. So, if for example, the Bible says you have the mind of Christ, your confession is that you indeed have the mind of Christ, even if the medical report says you have been diagnosed with bipolar disorder. To the ordinary mind, this may not make sense but we have to look at ourselves the same way God sees us. He sees us as perfect because the Blood of Jesus made us perfect and our confessions must consent to that else we remain in our predicament for it affects our faith in the Word of God. There is power in the words we speak. See Proverbs 18:21. (...Continued on page 6)
As you say (confess) what God says concerning you, your life will go in the direction of your words.
The Stigma of Mental Illness by Zoe A. Onah Stigma is real when it comes to mental illness. It is not something you can sweep under the proverbial carpet unnoticed and hope that it will just go away. Somewhere along the way, stigma will raise it’s ugly head. Dictionary.com defines stigma as 1.
2.
a mark of disgrace or infamy; a stain or reproach, as on one's reputation. a distinguishing mark of social disgrace
In case you were wondering what infamy also meant, here goes – ‘extremely bad reputation (source Dictionary.com)’ The very definitions are so painful and as I write this article, I am writing with much anguish. Stain? EXTREMELY bad reputation? Hello, someone. Can someone feel it like I do? No, I have never gone through the anguish of mental illness, but even before I became the carer to my
husband who was diagnosed with this ‘mark of disgrace’ disease, how could an illness conjure such reactions? Like it or not, stigma is real. Stigma hurts. Stigma is painful. The one way of changing the status quo of the stigma of mental illness/disorder or any other illness that brings stigma is by creating awareness. I really do not believe that many seek to deliberately stigmatise those challenged with mental illness. Sometimes we just are not aware that our reactions, our words actually do point to that. As we examine this hot topic again next issue, let us remember that those who suffer, those who are challenged with mental illness did not choose to be so. Let us remember more importantly, that they are people too.
God bless you and thanks so much for even reading this column. I appreciate that truly.
Meditations and Confessions for People facing Fear, Anxiety and Worry
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Defying Mental Illness put a full stop Our Vision
Power of Confessions Cont’d (from page 7) The Word of God has final authority in everything. We give authority by what we say and who we listen to. Accepting what the Word of God says is accepting God's
To put a full stop to the needless
authority. Listening to the Word of God is accepting this authority. You must apply
suffering, discrimination and
authority for it’s effects to be felt.
stigma of those challenged with
Confessing the Word of God and meditating upon it is applying the authority of the
mental illness, their caregivers and
Word of God. Matthew 12:37 says The words you say will either acquit you or
their loved ones who are affected.
condemn you. This shows us the power of our words.
Our Mission To support those challenged with mental illness and their caregivers in defying mental illness. To
You will have what you say. Start saying the right things today; look at yourself through God’s mirror, i.e. His word, instead of the natural mirror which shows your flaws. You were made in His image therefore you are no mistake or accident. As you say (confess) what God says concerning you, your life will go in the direction of your words.
combat discrimination and stigma. To lead, educate and create
Remember, if you don’t like what you have, change what you are saying!
awareness of mental issues.
Our Purpose To assert our rights as believers to
Defying Mental Illness - put a full stop
EVENTS
a sound mind and our rights to a divine life.
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Have you got an inspiring story to tell? Email your story (no more than 350 words) to: defyingtheodds@live.co.uk
Who we are DEFYING MENTAL ILLNESS is primarily a faith based Christian organisation. We believe literally in defying mental illness,
All articles must be original and may appear in this newsletter or our website. Please enquire for more details and our guidelines at above email. We reserve the right to refuse to publish any article.
no matter how long one has been challenged with the disease.
Zoe speaks at the Xtraordinary Lady Hosted by Lift Effects on
DEFYING MENTAL ILLNESS is non discriminatory and is open to everyone regardless of age, sex, status, faith or beliefs.
Saturday 12th July 2014 11 am Croydon Conference Centre, Surrey, UK Tickets on www.eventbrite.com Email: lifteffects@hotmail.com