Delayed Gratification issue two

Page 1


What’s the

big idea? Print is not dead. For all the wily charms of the digital world with its tweets, feeds, blogs and apps, there is still nothing like the pleasure created by ink on paper.


t

he server farms and all their delights cannot replace time spent in the company of something you can actually hold, whose pages you can turn down and whose spine you can crack. We believe in magazines which engross and inspire at the end of a long week. We have no interest in creating throwaway media – we want to make something which is treasured, which ends its days making the bookshelf, coffee table or toilet just that little bit prettier and more civilised. And we believe that everyone needs a screen break. Perspective, too, is not dead. Kneejerk punditry, live-blogging and the pounding waves of the 24-hour news cycle have their appeal. But there’s also joy in getting your head above the water, sucking in a lungful of clear air and taking your bearings. This is our starting point. With our belief in print and perspective we bring you , the UK's quarterly almanac. A handsome devil that curates the news and captures the times, written by journalists armed with three months’ worth of hindsight, and without the albatross of an hourly deadline around their necks. As the weeks and months zip by, we are keeping track, picking out the patterns, and seeing what is left after the dust has settled. We will strip out the white noise and give you the essentials, telling the story of the UK and the world over the last quarter. This publication, then, is our flag in the sand – a magazine of record from editors determined to swim against the electronic tide. We'd love to have you with us.


contents

Sat 1st Jan – Thu 31st Mar 2011 M I

M M Moments that mattered Retrospectives I Infographics and illustrations I

Politics Media & PR Economics Sport Arts & entertainment Prominent people Science & nature Crime & legal

M

The March I for the Alternative Sat 26th Mar

Philip Pullman on the protests against cuts

Soldiers without weapons Wed 9th Mar

At home with the Palestinian national football team

Prologue

The quarter in pictures (cryptic)

M I

The month in pop Mar opener

The meanings of March’s chart hits

“It all starts with a coffee machine” Mon 28th Feb

Morgan Spurlock looks at the effects of product placement

Heroes of the downturn Sat 5th Feb

Tales of ordinary men and women fighting cutbacks

M I

M I

Arab Spring timeline Fri 14th Jan

Gail force

From Tunisia to Bahrain: How unrest spread across the region

Wed 26th Jan

M

Expectant mothers

Mon 28th Feb

Caroline McGinn on a new wave of politicised mums

StevenIDavies

How to avoid corporation tax

Alan Duffy on homophobia in sport

Sat 19th Feb

Enjoying a life less levied

Gail Sheridan and the rise and fall of Tommy

M I

Thu 20th Jan

M

Keys and I Gray Sat 22nd Jan

Not coming to a cinema near you

Kevin Arscott on the making of the perfect tabloid storm

12th Feb

Mourning the lost films of the writers’ strike M I

One list to rule them all Sun 27th Feb

The film awards season distilled

The film formula Mon 28th Feb

The making of every cinematic release of February

M I

Soap opera death watch Mon 3rd Jan

60 years of dramatic mortality

M I

The Ashes digested Fri 7th Jan

Visualising the battle for the urn


Our son of a bitch

Do not go gentle into that good night…

Thu 17th Mar

Sun 27th Mar

The West’s role in the Arab dictatorships

Could changing the clocks save lives?

M I

Anjem provocateur

The sexual revolution started here

Wed 2nd Feb

Delayed Gratificaton meets Anjem Choudary M I

17th Mar

Marie Stopes, the heroine of birth control

The month in tweets Feb opener

M

The world seen by hashtag

The smart money

Christchurch I

“The ice cream is just a cover”

Tue 22nd Feb

Tue 8th Mar

Karen Wrigglesworth on the 6.3 magnitude aftershock

Thu 24th Feb

The politics of breast milk ice cream

The bets you should have made this quarter

M

The film formula Mon 31st Jan

The making of every cinematic release of January

Egypt I Fri 11th Feb

Gigi Ibrahim Hosni Mubarak’s departure

Enemies of the State

Tue 11th Jan

New reasons for national paranoia

The month in cuts Jan opener

Wed 16th Feb

Thu 31st Mar

Umberto Eco and Jean-Claude Carrière discuss the future of the book

The making of every cinematic release of March

Epilogue

The Sloan Digital Sky Survey: a new way to look at the universe

Tue 4th Jan

M I

The film formula

The book is like the spoon M SDSS I

The quarter in pictures (explicit)

Pete Postlethwaite remembered

Can we still afford the panda? Mon 10th Jan

Snap decisions

Sun 2nd Jan

Alan Rutter asks whether it’s time to let the panda bear go

Thu 3rd Feb

Fri 11th Mar

The rise of the super crocodile

Jon Wilks on the 9.0 magnitude earthquake

Greg Hersov recalls one of his favourite memories of the late actor

M

Japan I

January’s new public sector savings M I

The never ending story

The butterfly effect

Tue 18th Jan

The literary characters who are outliving their creators

Thu 24th Mar

M Tucson I Sat 8th Jan

Mark Evans on the shooting of 19 people in Tucson, Arizona

“You can’t process me with a normal brain”

The new gold rush Tue 1st Mar

Three very different tales from gold’s new frontiers

M I

Mon 7th Mar

Charlie Sheen’s fall from grace

How China’s decades-long boom is making British trains late

See you in court Mon 10th Jan

A collection of the more unusual court cases of the quarter

Meet the Justice Union

4th Jan

Seven years for a piece of mutton

Michael Bilton recounts the strange tale of Yorkshire Ripper hoaxer Wearside Jack

Sat 26th Feb

The price of crime in Victorian times

The UK’s first real life superhero team prepares to hit the streets

“I am the Ripper”

Sun 13th Mar


Pete Postlethwaite

Greg Hersov, artistic director of the Royal Exchange, remembers Pete Postlethwaite, who died on 2nd January.

“P

Sun 2nd

ete was always interested in something personal to do with the part. When we were doing ‘The Tempest’ in 2007, the big question for him – as for any actor playing Prospero – was Prospero’s staff, which he’s supposed to break at the end. And most actors worth their salt will be preoccupied with ‘what is my staff?’ because they often turn up and get landed with some great Old Testament club or some daft Darth Vader-like thing. And obviously when you talk about the staff you have to talk about what magic is in ‘The Tempest’ and what it means to be a magician. So Pete and I had long talks about what we thought magic could be on stage and what we thought Prospero was about and how it was something to do with a man devoted to a certain exploration of life who had focused his mind, his body and his emotions in a certain kind of way so that he could make things happen, which I think is also the only way you can make an audience believe something. And after a few months of discussion, Pete said, ‘I found a piece of wood in the garden, I think it might be the staff.’ I was like, ‘Oh my God, he’s going to come up with a staff design and its going to be mental.’ So the next time I saw him he brought out this piece of wood and he held it and was balancing it on one finger, and it had a very particular size and a very particular kind of shape and it was very simple, very thin, not very big – just bigger than a conductor’s baton. He looked at me and I said, ‘Wow, that’s really amazing!’ so he varnished this piece of wood and he and friends of his did things to it and it came along to rehearsals. During rehearsals, one terrible time, I took a backward step and heard a dreadful crack. There was this awful, ‘I-can’t-believe-it’ moment, everyone froze... I had trodden on the staff. It was okay, though, thank God. The staff became part of Pete when the audience saw it. He didn’t have to break it at the end, he handed it over to Ariel and just collapsed: he felt like all this power had come out of him. The audience believed him because he created it himself and I think that’s a kind of genius, to be able to do that, to have the originality and the taste and the care and the attention. No one who saw it would forget it and it was exactly the right thing for him to have. At the end of the run he gave it to me. He said, ‘I don’t need it any more, it’s for you.’ So I have it at home. It’s very special. Pete very much brought a company together, he liked other actors and he liked to create a whole kind

of family from the company. For him every night was like doing a gig, he had that kind of live excitement: his dressing room door would be open two hours before curtain and he would be in there and he used to have the very respectable old custom among actors of having the odd pint of Guinness to see him through the evening, and people would just drop in and talk to him. He’d always have either Bob Dylan’s ‘Modern Times’ or Johnny Cash playing and he would chat away. And after the performance he’d always want to be there in the bar and talk about what happened, not in a laborious way but in a very fresh way. Pete was fearless and he took risks, which is what all the great actors do. But there’s a world we live in now where everyone’s meant to deliver a brand or a known thing, and quite often I think actors are only being asked to give about 25 per cent of what they’re really capable of because people just want something everyone knows. Daniel Day-Lewis, who gives these amazing performances on film, knew Pete when he was a student and at Pete’s memorial service talked about the time they spent in Bristol. It was because they met there, that when Dan was doing ‘In the Name of the Father’, he said, ‘I want Pete Postlethwaite to play my father.’ And it’s actors like Peter and Dan who I think really push the boundaries. Pete was a great exemplar of that and I think that sometimes we don’t talk about the fact that this is what great acting is all about: imaginatively transforming yourself into something and taking risks as opposed to playing safe, which is what an awful lot of actors are being forced to do at the moment. Pete would always do this fantastic kind of farewell, he would go out into the theatre and do a clenched fist. It was just something he did that would make the audience feel like they had been involved in something, and make them feel special. That’s what I loved: he picked up on something that was a bit freer than theatre is normally, so the whole run of the play would be really exciting. He would always be in the moment and never got bored; he had people at the theatre who wanted to talk to him, he would have old friends he hadn’t seen for ages, he would have young filmmakers looking for help. It reminded me of being on the road with someone, with a band or something. It’s quite exceptional for an actor to be like that.” l Interview: Rob Orchard

“It kind of reminded me of being on the road with someone, with a band or something. It’s quite exceptional for an actor to be like that”

Pete Postlethwaite, 7th Feb 1946-2nd Jan 2011.


Jan Sat 1st A riot breaks out at Ford open prison

as inmates torch buildings in protest at a clampdown on illegal drinking. The balaclava-clad rioters cause an estimated £3 million worth of damage. Christopher Jefferies, the retired

schoolteacher arrested in connection with the murder of Joanna Yeates, is released by police.m 22nd Jan ‘Moment that mattered’ m 23rd Jan m 7th Mar 60,000 homes in Northern Ireland have their water cut off temporarily

to allow depleted reservoirs to refill. Vandals are blamed for emptying almost 5,000 gallons of water from temporary tanks in Coalisland, County Tyrone, causing some homes to be without running water for almost two weeks. An estimated 2,000 red wing blackbirds fall mysteriously from the sky in Beebe, Arkansas. m 4th Jan

“It is a disaster of biblical proportions” Queensland’s treasurer, Andrew Fraser, warns that the state’s

severe flooding could decimate its economy. m 11th Jan Sun 2nd

Social media index Klout declares that teenage Canadian singer Justin Bieber is the most influential person in cyberspace. ‘The Archers’ celebrates its sixtieth

anniversary with a double episode. After weeks of speculation about the content of the show that the BBC promised would ‘shake Ambridge to its core’ – including alien abduction, shootouts and bull rampages – Helen Archer has a baby and Nigel Pargetter falls off a roof. m 3rd Jan Actress Zsa Zsa Gabor is rushed to

hospital for an emergency amputation due to a blood clot in her leg. The actor Pete Postlethwaite dies at the age of 64.f


Mar Tue 1st

“The price of this financial crisis is being borne by people who did not cause it” At the Commons Treasury Committee, governor of the Bank of England Mervyn King blames the financial sector for causing the UK’s economic woes, and says he is “surprised that the degree of public anger has not been greater”. John Galliano is sacked by Christian Dior for “odious behaviour”. Dior had suspended the designer in February over alleged anti-semitic remarks. The dismissal followed a video surfacing of Galliano declaring on another occasion that “I love Hitler” and telling two women their parents “would have been gassed”.

The price of gold hits a historic high. g At the Sugarswirlz bakery in Cardiff, a woman smashes display units, causes £400 in damage and attacks a member of staff after being told there are no more “sweet tooth fairy cakes” left. Ice cream made from human breast milk is confiscated from a café by

Westminster council amid fears it is not suitable for consumption. j 24th Feb ‘The ice cream is just a cover’ Wed 2nd

In a shock victory, Ireland beat

England at the Cricket World Cup in Bengaluru, India. England had been on track to win until Irish batsman Kevin O’Brien, whose hair had been dyed shocking pink to promote a cancer charity, stepped up and made the fastest century in the history of the World Cup, finally being run out after hitting 113 from 63 balls. Police arrest 34 fans at Celtic Park

during a particularly heated Old Firm derby between Rangers and Celtic; 187 further arrests are made in the area as a result of tensions sparked by the game.

The new gold rush Amid global financial turmoil, gold – long seen as the safest of safe havens – hit a historic high on 1st March as prices soared to an unprecedented £877.29 an ounce. This market-led gold rush is having a huge effect around the world as prospectors, engineers, traders, warlords and scientists seek to cash in on the spike. Archie Davies and Marcus Webb explore three very different tales from gold’s new frontiers Tue 1st


The first frontier: The Scottish Highlands

SCHALK VAN ZUYDAM/AP/Press Association Images | Archie Davies

“F

our billion?” It’s one of the more unusual parlour games I’ve played in my time and in one of the more unusual parlours. The setting is Cononish Mine, 650 metres below Loch Lomond park in the Scottish Highlands, and the game is “guess the dollar value of the dirt around you”. Amazingly I seem to have hit the nugget on the head first time, although my companion is playing his cards close to his chest. “That’s probably not a bad figure,” laughs Chris Sangster, the CEO of Scotgold, an Australian-funded company that owns the rights to mine in the area. “There’s nearly $250 million here,” he says, as we go deeper into the kilometre-long shaft. “Multiply that by five, because we think we’ve got five similar deposits nearby, and if you expand the area…” He shrugs as his grin broadens. Sangster is a circumspect, quietly spoken man, and he is not getting ahead of himself. But I don’t need to be so cautious: $250m seems likely, $1.25bn very possible and $4bn not beyond the bounds of reason – all lying in the Scottish earth waiting for somebody to come and get it. Welcome to the damp British frontline of a gold rush that is having transformative effects all over the world. Unthinkable just a few years ago, a gold price above $1,400 (£858) an ounce is now the norm and Sangster and I are surrounded by the stuff. Yet the mine is dead: where you’d expect the clank and clatter of a hundred industrial drills busy at work there is only an eerie silence. Inside the tunnel, a rusty piece of equipment, long out of date, lies idle. We are the only ones here: all is currently calm on the new frontier and this gold mine is yet to sell a single ounce. The reason for Cononish’s silence is that the mine sits just inside the boundary of Loch Lomond and the Trossachs National Park, and near the Tay, a river protected by strict environmental and water-quality legislation. In August 2010 the park’s board, which is also the mine’s planning authority, rejected Scotgold’s latest planning application to begin mining.


Meet the Justice Union Sun 13th


On 13th March, five men tired of the crime they saw around them banded together to make a stand. Is this an example of the Big Society at work? Only if Cameron’s vision included martial arts, face masks and outfits ordered from eBay. Tea Krulos meets The Justice Union, the UK’s real life superheroes. Portraits by Rob Greig. Additional reporting Marcus Webb.

O

utside a McDonald’s somewhere in Salford, a speeding Land Rover screeches to a halt, and two suspicious characters exit the vehicle. Something isn’t right – they feel like they’re being watched, as if someone’s eyes are piercing them. Looking around, they spot a young man wearing a blue Lycra hood, a black eyemask similar to Zorro’s and a black leather trench coat.

He is Knight Warrior, a “Real Life Superhero”

“I stood a fair distance away getting ready to do something because it looked like a robbery was going to happen,” Knight Warrior says of this incident. “They looked around and saw me watching. As they saw me they drove off.” If this was a potentially bad situation thwarted by Knight Warrior’s presence, then he has achieved what the Real Life Superheroes are all about: small victories. The Real Life Superhero (or RLSH) movement started as an American phenomenon, but has since spread to include costumed thrillseekers looking to help out their fellow man around the world. Over the last couple of years, a handful of British citizens have got in on the act with their own larger-than-life personae. Some, such as The Statesman and Lionheart, operate independently, but a group of five new superheroes have formed their own “super team”. After months of discussion, they decided to call themselves ‘The Justice Union’ and opened the closest thing they have to a hideout – a Facebook page – on 13th March. The group includes Terrorvision, a man from Kent in his mid-thirties who does graphic design work and is co-owner of a music recording studio. He is married and has a family. Dark Spartan patrols town centres and residential areas around Torbay at closing time. He too is married, “outing” himself as a hero to his wife after a series of packages – including a police riot shield, body armour and a cast iron Spartan helmet – started arriving at their house. Rounding out the team are three superheroes in their late teens: Man in Black, Knight Warrior and Blackvoid. Blackvoid has a part-time job at a comicbook store in Plymouth, wears a Spandex mask and makes his own weapons, including a spring-loaded contraption that fires what looks like golf tees. Knight Warrior also has a Spandex mask and is secretive about his personal life. Man in Black has adopted a classic film noir look – a suit, a fedora and a scarf covering the lower half of his face. What these superheroes and crusaders like them around the world define as their mission varies. Some hit the street looking to stop

crime, others have a more humanitarian or popped up here and there. Super Barrio, of charitable focus, and some a balance of both. Mexico City dressed as a luchador wrestler “My goal is to squash the socially and championed working and housing rights acceptable apathy our country has adopted. in the mid-’80s. Captain Jackson, meanwhile I want to motivate “normal people” to help patrolled the small town of Jackson, Michigan, others,” Dark Spartan says. He tries to from 1989 onwards. connect with the public by handing out his The notorious Angle Grinder Man, angry at business card and fridge magnets to people heavy-handed parking laws, spent the early while on patrol. Like the rest of the heroes, 2000s sawing through wheel clamps on the he also has a Facebook page. His day job is streets of London. Motorists could get in spent working in finance where he says he touch with the vigilante through a hotline and also encounters a fair amount of corruption. soon Angle Grinder Man would arrive on the “I hope to achieve lower crime rates and scene, firing up his namesake machine. There help the homeless to have more of a chance is no record of him after 2005. at life,” Blackvoid says, explaining his goal. “I The year 2005 is also when what is now do also want some public interaction.” considered the modern Real Life Superhero There may be anywhere from ten to Movement began to develop rapidly. 15 active RLSH in the UK, but keeping a Hundreds of people have since signed up headcount on a secret society is a hard task. for the idea. Anyone can become a RLSH: The Justice Union there is no central Original RLSH Captain Sticky pictured with Stan Lee is not the UK’s first organisation, list of of Marvel Comics in the early 1970s. superhero team. rules, or membership A couple of years dues, which has led ago there was a to a wide diversity short-lived team with of participants in the a similar name, the movement. Union of Justice, featuring heroes like On the Captain Champion streets… and Black Arrow, This wide range of but those RLSH RLSH, of different have since “retired”, political, religious, moved on, or social, and economic disappeared into backgrounds, has the night. networked across America. Phoenix Jones, Superheroes: a the catalyst for a lot secret history of media interest, When people hear seemed to appear of the RLSH, many out of nowhere late last erroneously believe year, and for unknown this is something new, reasons captured the probably inspired by media’s attention. He films like ‘Kick-Ass’. patrols the streets The reality is that of Seattle up to five the concept goes nights a week with his much further back, team, the Rain City to at least the 1970s, Superhero Movement. where we find North of him, in some of the earliest Vancouver, Canada, is recorded prototypes. Thanatos, a 61-year-old Included in that line-up Vietnam vet. Thanatos is The Fox, a shadowy hands out supplies to environmental activist and Vancouver’s large homeless Captain Sticky, a rotund man population, in addition to doing who drew attention to issues he was advocating with his flashy superhero costume. some detective work. Motor Mouth, of San Francisco, leads the Pacific Protectorate who The first known usage of the term “real life swung into action attempting do-it-yourself superhero” can be found in a small-press crowd-control during riots in Oakland, book by a mysterious individual named Night California last July. Rider. The rare book was titled ‘How to Be One of the largest teams out there is a Superhero’ and was published in 1980. the New York Initiative, which was started Since then, occasional crusaders have

“My goal is to squash the socially acceptable apathy our country has adopted” – Dark Spartan


Thu 17th

The UN Security Council passes resolution 1973 (2011), which considers “that the widespread and systematic attacks currently taking place in the Libyan Arab Jamahiriya against the civilian population may amount to crimes against humanity” and imposes a no-fly zone over Libya. g m 21st Mar

“We are coming tonight… there won’t be any mercy” Speaking on state television, Libyan dictator Muammar Gaddafi threatens

rebels in the eastern city of Benghazi. Fri 18th

Rajib Karim, a 31-year-old software engineer at British Airways, is jailed for 30 years for conspiring with Anwar al-Awlaki to blow up a transatlantic flight. Karim, based in Newcastle, had attacked BA’s computer systems and attempted to get a cabin crew job so he could plant a bomb onboard a flight. The Tibetan parliament-in-exile, officially known as the Assembly of Tibetan People’s Deputies, passes a resolution asking the Dalai Lama – the fourteenth reincarnation of the Tenzing Gyatso, seen by Tibetans as the God King – to reconsider his request to resign as head of state. Sat 19th

Operation Odyssey Dawn in support of UN resolution 1973 begins, with air strikes by French warplanes on tanks used by Muammar Gaddafi’s forces outside Benghazi, and US cruise missile strikes from warships in the Mediterrannean. j 14th Jan ‘Arab Spring timeline’ A full Moon coincides with the perigee – the point in its orbit when it is closest to the Earth – to make a perigee-syzygy or “supermoon”, meaning the Moon is the closest it has been to the Earth for 19 years. m 20th Mar Sian O’Callaghan goes missing after

leaving Suju nightclub in Swindon.

m 24th Mar

Our son of a bitch

The UN’s approval of air strikes on Libya put a new twist on the ongoing tale of Western engagement with Arab dictatorships. Andrew Mueller examines our tortured relationship with the region’s strongmen… Thu 17th

I

t is plausibly the most brutally realistic assessment ever made by a head of government of one of his country’s allies: “He may be a son of a bitch, ­but he’s our son of a bitch.” It is most popularly attributed to Franklin D Roosevelt, who reputedly said it about unlovely Nicaraguan autocrat Anastasio Somoza Garcia. It says much about US foreign policy ­– and about foreign policy in general – that every president of the United States, from George Washington onwards, could have said something of the sort about many of America’s diplomatic partners, and generally with good reason. If the current occupant of the White House has not yet had the opportunity, it could be that recent events in the Middle East have left him, along with everyone else, uncertain as to whose son of a bitch is whose.

How the West was won

The Middle Eastern regimes which have wobbled, tottered and collapsed since the beginning of 2011 have all relied upon American – and before that British, French and Italian – patronage and protection. Hosni Mubarak inherited Egypt’s presidency in 1981 after the assassination of Anwar El-Sadat, murdered by his own soldiers who were enraged at his efforts to make peace with Israel. Mubarak’s ruthless junta in Egypt received an average of US$2 billion for each of its 30 years in power, much of it in military aid, including 240 F-16s, which would have been comfortably sufficient to see off Libya’s flying circus of Soviet-built antiques, if whoever is currently in charge in Cairo had been willing – or, perhaps

more charitably, able – to display some regional leadership. President Zine El Abidine Ben Ali of Tunisia, now wanted by nobody but Interpol, was a recipient of Western largesse throughout his quarter century in office. He was already prime minister when he helped himself to Tunisia’s presidency in 1987, after declaring ­– probably correctly, in fairness – ­that his predecessor, 84-year-old Habib Bourguiba, was no longer mentally capable. In the aftermath of Ben Ali’s own fall, claims emerged that his rise had been partly orchestrated by SISMI, the Italian intelligence service, in the interests, naturally, of stability. Ben Ali indisputably provided this, winning five consecutive elections, usually endorsed by around 90 per cent of the vote, although it was occasionally observed that the races might have been tighter had any meaningful opposition been permitted. The ruling al-Khalifa clan of Bahrain have been our sons of bitches since signing a treaty with Britain in 1820, and the Persian Gulf archipelago remained a British protectorate in some shape or form until 1971. Bahrain is still very much a family firm, despite the religious schism between its Sunni rulers and mostly Shia population. Approximately half the royal-appointed cabinet are blood relatives of King Hamad ibn Isa al-Khalifa (Hamad, incidentally, was a mere Emir when he followed his father into office in 1999; he declared himself King in 2002). Bahrain presently hosts the headquarters of the US Navy’s 5th Fleet, and Muharraq Airfield, a vital way-station for all US military operating in the region. In return for this hospitality, the Khalifas can feel confident that their

“Middle Eastern regimes which have collapsed since the beginning of 2011 have all relied upon American patronage and protection”

AMR NABIL/AP/Press Association Images

Mar


Egypt’s former president Hosni Mubarak meets Barack Obama in 2009


Mar Wed 23rd

continued j

Hollywood icon Elizabeth Taylor dies in Los Angeles aged 79.

The butterfly effect Thu 24th

Jose Socrates, the prime minister of Portugal, resigns after seeing his austerity budget rejected by the country’s parliament.

How Paramount Leader Deng Xiaoping affected the Cheddington commute. Words: Archie Davies 7.38am, 24th Mar 2011 The 7.38am train from Cheddington to London is delayed.

“Andrew Lansley, greedy Andrew Lansley, tosser! The NHS is not for sale, you grey-haired manky codger!”

l CHEDDINGTON

MC NxtGen posts a rap on YouTube

denouncing NHS reforms. The rap is viewed more than 250,000 times by the end of March and contains the refrain, “So the budget of the PCTs, he wants to hand to the GPs/ Oh please! Dumb geeks are gonna buy from any willing provider/Get care from private companies.” Thu 24th

Police find the body of Sian O’Callaghan near the village of Wantage in Oxfordshire. Another body is reportedly found nearby. Manchester University announces it will charge students £9,000 per year in tuition fees as of the new academic year in 2012. m 28th Mar

9000BC

22nd Dec 1978 During the Third Plenary Session of the 11th Central Committee of the Communist Party of China, Deng Xiaoping, Paramount Leader of the People’s Republic, announces the start of the country’s “Four Modernisations” programme. Deng is widely quoted as saying, “Poverty is not socialism. To be rich is glorious.” China now exports more each day than it did in the whole of 1978.

m

Somewhere in the Middle East, copper is first discovered and extracted.

m

¥£$

The ‘English Indices of Multiple Deprivation 2010’ report is released. It shows that the most deprived place in the country is Jawywick Sands in Essex, and that the least

deprived is Chorleywood, Herts.

The 07.38 from Cheddington to London is delayed due to the attempted theft of railway signalling cables from the line. g Fri 25th

“Your utter depravity knows no bounds” At Woolwich Crown Court, Judge

Peter Rook sentences Delroy Grant,

aka the Night Stalker, to 27 years in prison for raping and assaulting elderly people over 17 years.

h 16th May 1980

The Special Economic Zone of Shenzhen is established. Shenzhen, a fishing village singled out by Deng Xiaoping for an experiment in market capitalism, goes on to receive over $30bn of foreign investment. It now has a population of more than 15 million people, 13 buildings over 200m high and has been China’s fastest growing city for 30 years.


3am, 10th Aug 2010 11.59pm, 31st Dec 2010 Copper prices start 2011 at a record high price of $9,631.75 per tonne. China is consuming 63 per cent more copper in 2011 than over an equivalent period in 2007.

i

1.00am, 24th Mar 2011 Thieves attempt to steal cable from London Midland train tracks, the latest in a series of copper-motivated crimes on the UK’s railways.

China becomes the world’s second largest economy, officially overtaking Japan in the second quarter of 2010. Its consumer electronics market is worth $125 billion a year and is growing at an annual rate of 26 per cent.

m

31st Mar 2009 In the first quarter of 2009, China consumes 27 per cent of the global copper supply. It is estimated that China’s copper stockpile, used as collateral for financial deals, could exceed 500,000 tonnes.

Made in China

1

m

TONNE

$9631.75

f

2009 $560bn is spent on residential property in China. 41kg of copper is used in the construction of the average middle-class home in the country.

41kg

m

$560bn

SOLD

g

1st Jul 2008

The hillside village of Bentang in Dao County receives electricity for the first time as China’s power grid continues to grow. State Grip Corp, the biggest Chinese electricity distributor, uses a million tonnes of copper every year.

¥

Cu

h14th Sep 2007

h

The Shanghai Financial Centre tops out. At 492m, it is the world’s third tallest building.

Spring 1992

h

5.15pm, 19th Dec 1990

Deng Xiaoping reopens the Shanghai Stock Exchange. The Chinese economy begins to open up and economic growth accelerates.

Deng Xiaoping’s southern tour of Guangzhou, Shenzhen and Zhuhai results in an increase in the speed of privatisation. A building boom gathers pace in Shenzhen and other Special Economic Zones, requiring more and more copper.

Cu

2pm, 13th Jul 2001 Sources: Bloomberg, CSA Discovery Guides, The Economist, The Financial Times, Reuters, Shenzhen Government Online, The World Bank Policy Research Working Paper 5216

h

Beijing is awarded the 2008 Olympic Games, which results in an investment of over $44bn, mainly spent on infrastructure and new buildings.


Mar

Sat 26th Mar 2011

The March for the Alternative Philip Pullman

Sat 26th

The TUC-organised March for the Alternative sees an estimated

400,000 people from across the country descend on London to protest against the government’s programme of cuts. In separate protests, Fortnum & Mason is broken into, Oxford Street shop windows are smashed and Nelson’s Column is graffitied. g Charli Dickenson, an avid Tweeter with 164 followers, tweets a picture of a house in Port Tenant, Swansea, which she says looks like Hitler. It is retweeted by comedian Jimmy Carr and goes viral, receiving hundreds of thousands of views. Sun 27th

Thousands of anti-nuclear demonstrators march in the streets of Tokyo.

Rogerio Ceni, goalkeeper for Sao Paolo, scores the hundredth goal of his career, putting his team 2-0 up against Corinthians. The clocks go forward. Mon28th

Forces supporting president elect Alassane Ouattara launch a “general offensive” in Ivory Coast, engaging with troops loyal to President Laurent Gbagbo. m 31st Mar Research from the House of Commons library shows that a

Charli Dickinson

funding gap of more than £1bn could open up in higher education if more institutions decide to charge the maximum tuition fees of £9,000 per year. The government had budgeted on the basis of tuition fees being an average of £7,500.

John Stillwell/PA Wire/Press Association Images | Steve Parsons/PA Archive/Press Association Images

m ‘Do not go gentle into that good night’

The HMS Ark Royal is put up for sale on www.edisposals.com, the auction website of the Ministry of Defence, alongside destroyers HMS Nottingham and HMS Exeter. Anyone interested in purchasing the aircraft carrier has until 13th June to submit their bid.

Moment that mattered

“I was glad to see the March for the Alternative happen, although I didn’t think it would change anything. Marches never do. You should take part in them full-heartedly while secretly realising they won’t make any difference. It would be foolish to say I’m opposed to all cuts. I’m sure somewhere hidden away there are cuts that are necessary, but there’s no doubt about the enormous amount of social damage that the current government is setting out to wreak on our society. There is an alternative that is simple but the Labour Party dare not make the case for it. It depends on raising taxes. We’ve got to have higher taxes for richer people. I’m rich by most people’s standards and I don’t pay enough money in tax. I would be delighted to pay more, as long as other people in my position, and many richer people, paid their fair share. Labour lacks the political courage to make this case. They’ve got to stand up to the shrieking and screaming of the Murdoch press and the Daily Mail and the Telegraph, who would come down furiously on any government who tried to do so. I do think it’s short-sighted for a government to cut arts and culture funding. The arts have always needed money put into them from the outside. I’ll be accused of exaggerating and be told that they can earn their own way. They can’t. You can guarantee a full theatre with a pantomime and if you want to fill a concert hall you put on a programme of recycled pop or old orchestral favourites, but it’s death really to go on recycling the same old things. If they’re going to live and flourish they’ve got to have the chance to do the new stuff and that means, inevitably, that they’ve got to be subsidised. Is there any merit to this new Big Society? It’s a very slippery one to grasp, because one never knows what Cameron means by the Big Society. It seems to mean replacing as many things as possible that people are paid for with things that people do for nothing, by volunteering. Again, I’m very sceptical about this making any difference. I’m cynical because it’s another way for the Tories to show their contempt for the publicly funded good things that we’ve got and their desire to return us to a situation where everything has to be privately run. You can see the flaws in market fundamentalism straight away if you look at it. But people are caught up in the excitement and the possibility of making money and the sheer sexiness of conviction – if you’re convinced of something it is a more sexy feeling than if you’re not convinced about it or you’re more half-hearted about it. And people are very susceptible to this excitement of blazing certainty. You see it in fundamentalists of any sort. It’s a very exciting feeling but a dangerous one. It was so convenient for the right-wing press that there was trouble on the day of the march. I wouldn’t put it past some of these right-wing buggers to do a little provocation of their own. I don’t really think that the Conservative Party would join with anarchists and start smashing stuff up. But still…” l Interview: Rob Orchard



Feb How to avoid corporation tax Wed 16th

Sat 19th US bookseller

CEOs: tired of seeing your profits disappear into the government’s coffers? Read on… Illustration: Christian Tate. Words: Rob Orchard

Borders closes 200 of its stores and

files for bankruptcy.

g

An investigation by The Guardian reveals that the government’s plans to set a minimum price for alcohol would only affect one in almost 4,000 drinks deals. The Japanese government suspends its annual whaling hunt in the Antarctic after protesters made it difficult for the event to take place.

“I, for one, welcome our new computer overlords”

1. Move your company’s headquarters from Country A, your high-tax birthplace, to Country B, an accessible European nation with low levels of corporation tax.

2. Set up a shell company in Country C – a Caribbean island with low or no levels of corporation tax. Do not visit the company, employ any staff or produce any goods or services.

3. Put the rights to your brand under the legal ownership of the shell company. Get the shell company to charge your main operation large sums to use its own name and brand identity. Pay these charges: this money is now untaxable.

4. Your shareholders will reward you with a handsome raise and make ‘thumbs up’ signs at you. Enjoy the warm feelings of belonging this induces and buy yourself a Porsche.

5. Problem: you can’t funnel the remainder of the company’s profit directly from Country B to Country C without incurring tax. Solution part one: set up a second shell company in Country D. Do not visit it, employ any staff or produce any goods or services.

6. Solution part two: send all payments which come in to Country B immediately on to your company in Country D, which has accommodating tax laws for onward transfers to Country C. Your shareholders will welcome you to the AGM with a standing ovation. Treat yourself to a nice yacht.

7. Transfer your shares in all companies to your husband, wife or partner. Move them to Country E – which levies no income tax on individuals – for one whole tax year. They are now classed as “non-resident for tax purposes” in Country A.

8. Take out a company loan and use it to help fund a large dividend to all the shareholders, including your partner. Offset the interest payable on the loan against your annual profits when calculating your corporation tax in Country A.

9. Accept another raise from the board and take a celebratory flight to Country E in your new golden helicopter.

Ken Jennings, famous for winning 74 games in a row on the TV quiz show ‘Jeopardy’, acknowledges his defeat at the hands of Watson, a computer made by IBM. Watson – which uses artificial intelligence systems to answers questions in natural language – won $1m (£624,414) which was donated to charity.

Thu 17th Environment Secretary Caroline Spelman confirms that the

government has abandoned its plans to sell off Britain’s public forests following a huge backlash. “One of the things we teach our children to do is say sorry,” she says. “It is not a humiliation; it is my choice.” Belgium breaks the modern world record for the longest period of time without a government – 250 days.

“It’s like Cairo has moved to Madison these days” Republican congressman Paul Ryan

comments on the public protest against cuts in Wisconsin. j 5th Feb ‘Heroes of the downturn’

Tom Pickles

Fri 18th

French journalist Eric Zemmour is found guilty of incitement to racial hatred after claiming that most drug dealers are “blacks and Arabs”.


THE POLITICS OF BREAST MILK ICE CREAM umberto eco on the death of the book the man who pretended to be the ripper morgan spurlock on product placement arab spring timeline Every news story that mattered And a huge amount more

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