JAN/FEB 2015 | The Wedding Issue by DELUX Magazine

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MISCONCEPTIONS ABOUT YOUR RELATIONSHIPS

By Porshia Thomas

ave your relationship myths, because I don’t want to hear it! Remember when meeting people online had that persona, that only lame and desperate people who weren’t cool enough in person dated online? Well, times are changing. Some relationship myths have changed due to the times, and some are just simply not true. With divorce rates in the US close to 50%, its so obvious that we have not been learning what we need to know when choosing the right mate and keeping our romantic relationships alive and healthy. I think its safe to say we all have been learning the WRONG information for years now when it comes to obtaining and sustaining a relationship, especially during the hard times. These modern day relationship myths are responsible for many breakup’s. Please, don’t fall prey to these insidious beliefs . Don’t ruin your chances of finding that special someone.

1) “You have only one “true love” This is commonly portrayed in movies, fairy tales, and actually does more harm than good because it sets us up for the belief that we must wait for our true love. And where does that leave those who are getting a divorce? 2) “A good relationship with someone you love doesn’t need sex” Sex is an important – integral – part of intimacy. It’s not something to be rushed into, but to achieve intimacy, we must be able to be vulnerable to our mate. 3) “Once we get married, then everything will be perfect” Unfortunately, relationships don’t work that way. Marriage brings its own array of stresses (financial, legal, etc.) It isn’t a magic pill to fix or improve a relationship. If you can’t be happy together before marriage, it’s unlikely that a ceremony is going to cure

4 JANUARY | FEBRUARY 2015 www.DeluxMag.com

your issues. First, make your relationship great, and then maybe marriage will be in the cards. 4) “All the good ones are taken” This commonly belief helps those of us who are single to feel okay about being single. The truth is, a great mate could be right under your nose! so stop being negative or prepare to be single forever! 5) “True love conquers all” Although a beautiful, romantic notion, it’s the boring Part II of the courtship or marriage that will make or break a couple. There is much more to a relationship than love. 6) “Children will make you closer to your mate” Children are fabulous additions to a life, they can also complicate a situation. Children need love, attention,

time, and stability – and co-parenting can be extremely challenging. Extremely challenging if your relationship is already strained. 7) “Relationships are hard work” I don’t know about you but I’d be damn if life becomes just about as much fun as cleaning the toilets and mopping floors. When your with your partner, being together shouldn’t be a chore. Relationships do, however, requires attention and nurturing but it shouldn’t feel like work. Fortunately, when you’re in love, you want to spend time with your mate. Be creative and have fun together. Do you think some of these are true? What other relationship myths have you been told? Lets Chat. Email me at porshia@deluxmag.com

DELUX MAGAZINE

DELUX MAGAZINE NO. 35

CONTENT

Keith N Griffin II

PUBLISHER/CO-FOUNDER @DeluxMagazine Lawrence Bryant Co-Founder @lbfoto1 Michael Winfield Co-Founder @brklynstl Kyle A Griffin Co-Founder Brian Shields Co-Founder

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Leneia Weston-O’Hara Leneia@DeluxMag.com Fashion Editor Letitia McPherson-Young Letitia@DeluxMag.com

Entertainment Editor DeWarren Smith Music@DeluxMag.com Writers Orrin Carter DeWarren Smith Omar O’Hara April Whittington, LE Joyce Gates Porshia Thomas Diane Jackson

15 regular featured

Stuff 08 11 Rock Paper Scissors: Koran Bolden People Who Inspire 11 32 COVER: LISA WU Art + Culture 17 34 Wedding Fahion Finance 19 49 FEATURE: The Bride and Groom Fitness 20 56 FOOD: PeaceKeepers Beauty + Health 22 62 City Garden Montessori Where 55 Delux Seen 60

Graphic Design Studio 76 Arthur Smith RedRazor Media Photographers Lawrence Bryant McArthur Smith Allen B. Thompson Keith N Griffin II Arlis Davis Donny Bradfield Sales | Ads@deluxmag.com Keith A. Willis Sr Cam Cobb (Stl) Lauren Phillips Jonathan Butler Brandon Kendrick (KC) Publicist/PR Rep Tashia Devouex Heidi Pearson

DELUX MAGAZINE No. 35 January/February 2015 · Year 6· PUBLISHER Keith Griffin II GRAPHIC DESIGN G5IVE MEDIA GROUP SUBSCRIPTIONS $19.99/YR. Mail Subsciption Cards and Payment to 4818 Wasghinron Blvd St. Louis Mo 63108 DISTRIBUTOR Cowley Distributing Jefferson City MO IPAD APP Available in itunes store WEBSITE www.delux-mag.com ADVERTISING Email Ads@deluxmag.com SUBMISSIONS Email submissions@deluxmag.com PRESS RELEASES Email PR@deluxmag.com

Editor’s Note

iving in the city of St. Louis is a dream come true for me. I was a poor little girl, with big city dreams and very high hopes. At 10 years old, I came here on vacation with my Aunt Joy and Uncle Tim, and my Cousin Erin and I were having the time of our life in the STL. We loved it. The Cardinals game was beyond fun. The Zoo was mind blowing. OMG the Fudgery at Union Station! The Science Center was more than I could take in to my little brain… I loved it here. I vowed to come back and live here when I was 10. I fell in love with St. Louis on vacation, and living here for the last 11 years has been a dream life.

Sitting at home watching a documentary titled “Living on One Dollar,” and darn it! I’m incredibly sad and depressed - and envious - of the laughter and community of the people living in poverty in Guatemala. I find it heartwarming they band together for survival, and love their neighbors like their own family. The only thing I’ve experienced in St. Louis that has been a disappointment as a transplant is the social poverty. I can’t decide if it’s St. Louis in general, or part of American culture. But I miss the “village” setting in which I grew up. My neighbors knew my parents well, and the influence of my church family and parents of my school friends were an intricate part of the person I’ve become today. That influence seems to be missing today, and I’d love to find more like-minded people.

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I read a Danish proverb which stated, “Life is not holding a good hand; Life is playing a poor hand well.” I’ll take that challenge and say that I love my city, and I vow to make my community a place in which my kids are proud to grow up. I chose to be here, and I choose to stay here and promise to be a part of the solution to make it better. I hope there are others who are with me when I say, “I love living here, and I plan to make it great!” Follow me on Facebook or Twitter or Instagram, and join in the STL fun! 2015 will be a great year of making our city great!

[Stuff]

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ELLE VARNER REVEALS OFFICIAL “COLD CASE” VIDEO VIA GENERO.TV VIDEO PROJECT! ELLEPHANTS! Elle called on all of her many talented fans, filmmakers & videographers alike to direct a video for her song “Cold Case” from her upcoming album 4 Letter Word. Be sure to watch the video on YouTube. Congratulations to director & producer Bosco Shane & Tom Pall aka. MONOLITHMAYO!

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The short-story collection Before You Suffocate Your Own Fool Self is a co-winner of the 2011 PEN American Robert W. Bingham Prize, a National Book Foundation 5 under 35 selection for 2011, the winner of the 2011 Paterson Prize for Fiction and the 2011 HurstonWright award for fiction, and an honorable mention for the 2011 PEN/Hemingway award. It was named one of the best books of 2010 by Kirkus Reviews and O Magazine, and longlisted for The Story Prize. Cleary it’s good. Read it!

ICONIC: TONY SCOTT

EAH MAN. For 26 years, these two words formulated the signature catch phrase for the voice of St. Louis: the legendary on-air personality, Tony Scott. But in recent months, these words have arisen to represent the public’s reaction to Tony’s return to radio. To the frustration of many last May, Clear Channel (now iHeart Media Radio) released Scott from “The Tony and Tammie Morning Show” on Magic 104.9, and the absence of Tony was immediately felt on the airwaves by many avid listeners. Many even boycotted the station after the incident. But the remarkable thing about Tony is his attitude. He is a natural champion, with a knack for reinvention. Prior to working on his current endeavors and long before the popular “Tony Scott and Tammie Morning Show,” Tony was a phoenix. He worked on radio shows with such genres as oldies, jazz, rock, hip hop, country, and of course R&B. He has also worked in cities like Houston, San Francisco, and Detroit before coming to St. Louis. “I’m very proud of the amount of time that I’ve spent in St. Louis; I love everything about this town.” And St. Louis loves Tony. “I’ve been here for so long that a lot of people that were kids when I started have their own family, so I’ve always been around. When they turned their radios on, I was there and so I’ve became like a family member to a lot of people.” He adds, “People started calling me Uncle Tony, which I take as a term of endearment. I’m honored that people think that much of me.” Two moments throughout his lengthy career

Words By: Joyce Gates

that truly sticks out to him are September 11th and the passing of Michael Jackson; both moments in history were challenges for Tony because for both he had to talk on air…with no music. But Tony isn’t afraid of challenges, in fact he loves them. Since last May, Tony has been creating 30min podcasts called the Tony Scott Internet Show (which are currently available for download.) Additionaly, he conceived his own media company, Tony Scott Media. Tony Scott Media generates such programming as iTony chat, a YouTube show presenting “tech news for non-geeks” (itonytech.com); Men on Everything; Men on Scandal, a show in which Tony and two other men review Scandal from a male perspective (malescandal.com). Tony also has a new radio show Saturdays from 2-7pm, Sundays from 3-7pm on Old School 95.5. “I’m still able to do what I did there (at Magic 104.9)…it’s a newer version of what I did in the past, I hope to incorporate more social media into it,” he notes. Tony gives credit to Boogie D for his current on-air opportunity. In a previous interview with Kevin Johnson of the St. Louis Post-Dispatch, Tony is quoted as saying, “I’m grateful for Boogie. He told me if anything ever happens to me over there (at Magic) he’ll find something over here (at 95.5).” In addition to his new radio show and many other endeavors, Tony has partnered with Delux magazine, featuring his iTony chat posts on the Tech Tuesday section of the Delux blog. “I’m looking forward to doing stuff with Delux magazine because it’s the new frontier and I love challenges and being able to be a contribution to the success of Delux magazine.”

SELMA

DRAMA FILM/HISTORY | MOVIE Although the Civil Rights Act of 1964 legally desegregated the South, discrimination was still rampant in certain areas, making it very difficult for blacks to register to vote. In 1965, an Alabama city became the battleground in the fight for suffrage. Despite violent opposition, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. (David Oyelowo) and his followers pressed forward on an epic march from Selma to Montgomery, and their efforts culminated in President Lyndon Johnson signing the Voting Rights Act of 1965.

WITH THIS RING ROMANTIC COMEDY | MOVIE

Lifetime TV has release the trailer from its latest Original Movie, With This Ring, which will premiere on Saturday, January 24, 2015, at 8pm ET/PT. The romantic comedy based on the best seller The Vow by Denene Millner, Angela Burt-Murray and Mitzi Miller. With This Ring - Brooklyn Sudano, Eve Jeffers Cooper and Regina HallWritten and directed by Nzingha Stewart, the romantic comedy centers on three single best friends (Jill Scott, Regina Hall, and Eve) who attend the lavish wedding of a fourth on New Year’s Eve and desperation pushes them to make the vow to be married within the year. Each woman starts the year with hopes of what will happen over the next 12 months, but will they all make it to the altar? DELUX MAGAZINE

KORAN BOLDEN M “ROCK, PAPER, SCISSORS”

ost people start their professional lives working fast-food jobs or retail gigs at the local mall, but Koran Bolden isn’t most people. At age 12 he started his own business and solidified his first multi-million dollar contract offer by 21 from Def Jam Records. “Music if one of my biggest passion, I respect Hip Hop cause it gave me an outlet to express myself and dreams of being successful,” Bolden recalls. Catapulted from normality, he was headed to hip hop stardom when his dream was suddenly stripped of light. “I was forced out, the leadership changed, my contract was terminated and I had given up on music,” Bolden says.

Bolden exited the situation feeling defeated - not knowing success is multi faceted - he went back to work, making $7 an hour. Unbeknownst to him, Bolden had a calling. He came up with the idea of opening a recording studio in the mall. “ I had no money, no credit but I spoke to the universe & to God that I was going to get the money for the

studio. I went in to work one day, got laid off and my job gave me a severance package of $15,000.” From there, Bolden began to understand he held a personal power on the inside of him when he activated his faith on his passion. “You really move mountains when you begin to speak things into existence,” says Bolden. The former rapper is now the founder and CEO of Street Dreamz Artist Development Center located in the St Louis Mills Outlet Mall. With two new satellite locations opening in local school districts, the focus is on entrepreneurship, mentoring and the arts for the youth. A highly sought after motivational speaker with clients such as GAP Inc, Banana Republic and Cadillac, Bolden says the business has been a very lucrative endeavor. “I got into speaking by accident. People started coming into my studio like ,‘Who owns this? It’s a positive message! Come to our schools!’ After I started to perfect it, people were like, ‘Your’re really good, you can get paid.’ Motivational Speaking is one

By Porshia Thomas of the highest paid professions in the world with branches of opportunity like personal coaching. “I’m opening an online school around Spring 2015 for people who want to get into the business. It’s the best way to grow any brand. Word of mouth at its finest.” Koran Bolden can now add accomplished author to his resume with his new book entitled, Rock, Paper Scissors: 3 Secrets How Your Failures Make You Famous, selling more than 1,000 copies in the 1st week. “I’ve given easy-to-use principles, made them relevant enough to cause a mind change for the better so you can actually transform your life.” Taking one from a place of hardship and putting them into a place that produces successful results is more fulfilling than working for any Fortune 500 company ever could. “Find your passion, perfect it and create solutions for people.”

DELUX MAGAZINE

Embracing Diversity and Expanding the Brand

Ericca Willis

Who's Who Diversity in Color Publisher 314.473.5257 mswhoswhoinstl@aol.com

Whoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Who Diversity In Color 7584 Olive Blvd., Suite 201 St. Louis, MO 63130 12 JANUARY | FEBRUARY 2015 www.DeluxMag.com

INSPIRE

DELUX.COM OR IPAD APP FOR MORE WITH NARETHA HOPSON

aretha Hopson is the Founder and Executive Director of Ever-Appropriate Etiquette Institute: a character and leadership consulting firm that teaches “soft skills” to persons and organizations in St. Louis and throughout the United States. The Institute’s curriculum offers a variety of training and development in areas such as Dining Etiquette, Business Etiquette, Impression Management, The Art of Networking, Personal and Professional Branding, and Social Media Etiquette. Ms. Hopson helps persons learn as she describes it, “the art of making others feel comfortable and presenting your best self.” With clients ranging from high school and college students, individuals who are interested in climbing the corporate ladder, entrepreneurs, and those seeking to re-enter the job market, she has found her passion instructing in the “unspoken language” of etiquette. The road to founding EAEI was an unexpected one, but a natural progression because of her own experience. Naretha noticed a big difference in the level of exposure and opportunities offered her and others graduating from public high school in contrast to her brothers and sisters with elite private school experiences. She continued her studies, and after graduating from UMSL went on to become the first female African American salesperson at Plaza Motors. Naretha describes her experience there as an interesting one, and it was there she gained the skill set which helped her become successful. From there, she ventured into real estate, where she continued to excel and thrive. The skills she gained were powerful, and she wanted to share them. In every facet of the skills, the theme of confidence and importance of mindset were a constant.

NARETHA HOPSON

How well do you practice good etiquette? Ms. Hopson says that it is not about perfection. “You know weall have our moments when we do not practice good etiquette. It’s about having the information, and knowing the keys to that unspoken language in business and social situations.” Whether it is the do’s and don’ts of networking, keys to being successful on job interviews, or making sure that first impression is a good one; EAEI has you covered. The correlation becomes very clear when you are introduced to her methods. Her work began as an outlet to be involved in the community and has evolved into an institution.

Naretha’s success and heart for the community earned her several board positions with local non-profits where she would lend her honed expertise and experiences volunteering in schools. Through her board work she recounts, “I would literally be at a school during the day and a black tie gala at night and would notice the same thing across the board: there is an opportunity for exposure and improvement with softskills.” EAEI emerged from this realization. A passion was ignited in exposing others to skills that prepare them for opportunity. She notes that, “Academics are obviously very important but equally as importantare soft skills. When you have degrees you get to the door; your soft skills, the way that you presentyourself will get you through the door.” She has taken her findings to the next level authoring a book, Ever-Appropriate Etiquette 5 Steps to the Professional Presence that Pays, a quick reference guide to learning the basics of dining and business. Along with speaking engagements across the country, EAEI will be offering an online course that will offer a step by step guide to effective personal brand building and networking at www.artof6degrees.com and there is even more on the way in 2015 and beyond. Be sure to follow Ever-Appropriate Institute on Social Media at @EverAppropriate and online at everappropriate.com

DELUX MAGAZINE

14 JANUARY | FEBRUARY 2015 www.DeluxMag.com

INSPIRE

DELUX.COM OR IPAD APP FOR MORE WITH DEBRA BASS

FASHIONISTA DEBRA BASS Words by Porshia Thomas

Photo by: Johnny Andrews

“The St. Louis fashion scene is full of surprises. I think it’s underestimated but there’s room for a thriving fashion industry for ambitious fashion professionals. We have the talent, we just need the critical masses and the city is heading in that direction,” declares Debra Bass. A Las Vegas native who now calls St. Louis home, Bass admits, “I never wanted to be a fashion expert, but life happens.” For the past eight years, Bass has attended fashion week in New York City, a place where every thriving fashionista would die to go. “I don’t consider myself a fashion expert, I read a lot about it, I’m not shy about my opinions on fashion, but I guess I’m as much of an expert as the television personalities on ‘Fashion Police’ .” And that she is. Debra gave essential advice on building one a versatile and useful wardrobe. “I’d always tell someone to invest in better basics. Some people think style is all about the loud, over-the-top pieces, but you can see the true style of people in their basics. Not everyone needs a blazer, but if you want a new sweater don’t buy three cheap ones you’ll throw away in a year, invest in one that you’ll want to wear for the next three years or more. The same goes for everything in your closet. Find the basic colors you wear often and don’t buy anything that won’t coordinate with at least three things you already own.” Advice to be tucked and stored away til shopping day arrives, Bass seriously advises investments in boots, a great bag or a striking winter coat. Staples you’ll wear and rotate for years. “If I’m spending money on something I don’t like it to be flashy, I want it to look

expensive- even if it’s not.” Invitations to the best fashion shows and parties, champagne on tap.... A fashion editor’s life may sound heavenly, but the journey to front-row Nirvana is no easy five step guide to entitlement. Words to all those who want to be the next Debra Bass? “Don’t be me, be the best you. Study. I meet lots of people who want to go into fashion, but they can’t name five fashion designers off the top of their heads or they don’t know a common designer name like Riccardo Tisci of Givenchy.” When asked her favorite looks for upcoming spring and summer 2015, “I do like the color of the year prediction of marsala, a warm red wine, but I’m looking forward to less fitted jeans and summer dresses, any dress that doesn’t require the parka I’m wearing now,” Bass laughs. “I don’t have a favorite fashionista but if you’re on Instagram you have to follow these guys @iseeadifferentyou and @ ciprianaquann, they have fun with style. Don’t try too hard to be stylish, just be you.” Follow Debra’s weekly video series called #STLStreetStyle and check out her blog, Deb’s Style File at stltoday.com/stylefile. She’ll be heading to fashion week in New York City in February.

THE

MCKINNEY GROUP WEALTH DELUX: Thanks for taking time out of your busy schedule to meet with us today. Tell us a litle about yourself WM: I am The President and CEO of McKinney Group Wealth. I always wanted to be a Business man and I was always interested in how did a business start, what was the driving force behind it. When I was about 11 years old I was on a school field trip and I noticed a line of large Buildings on a street named Lindell Blvd. I asked my teacher what where they, she replied those are houses. I asked my teacher, who lives there? My teacher replied, businessmen live there. I have always wanted to be a businessman from that point. DELUX: With all that is going on in not just the economy but also within our own community such as Ferguson whats the biggest issue that faces our country today? WM: I think that the most important issue that faces this country, the community of Ferguson and communities like Ferguson is the lack of the expansion of opportunity. I believe that we as Americans have a responsibility to insure that opportunity is extended to all of America’s citizens. We as Americans must ensure that access to jobs and a high quality education exist for all Americans. If we fail to do this we hurt America, the promise of America and ourselves. B. The ability to obtain quality employment is the very basic requirement to begin the process of accumulating wealth. I believe that the creation of wealth is not a money issue it is a discipline and planning issue. If you don’t have a job, employment, skills, or education the process can never begin. I was picking cotton 46 years ago in Braggadocio MO. I know that everything has a process and I believe that the creation of real tangible wealth is a process.

DELUX: In your experience what’s the biggest challenge in building true wealth? And if you are come into wealth how does one manage it correctly? WM: I believe that most of the families in most of the communities in this country really don’t know how to accumulate wealth or manage it successfully. I would ask you to take a look at some of our sports personalities in recent years. They may have accumulated wealth with a large NFL, NBA, MLB contract, but many at the end of their careers were penniless. That is why I developed the quote “The creation of wealth is not a money issue, it is a discipline and planning issue”. The most important thing that any family can do is seek financial advice. The families in the communities that we discussed previously never start that process. I and McKinney Group Wealth bring a disciplined and detailed oriented process to our clients that they in most cases have never experienced before. I was a Marine for more than 20 years and that life experience of integrity and discipline is incorporated in every, portfolio, portfolio review, asset allocation strategy and tactical financial decision that we employ for the benefit of our clients and their families. DELUX: What seperates The McKinney Group from other financial advising firms? WM: Here at McKinney Group Wealth we never give out general advice, no real Financial Advisor ever does, so the only advise that I can give is that the sooner that you start planning for you and your family the greater the benefit. DELUX: Here at DELUX we reach many Millenials with disposable income. They are college educated but may not be financially educated. What advice do you have for our readers and how they should manage their money?

WM: I would say the first mission that the young men and women will be challenged with will be debt management. I know that most of them have extensive student loans, which means that they will have significant financial obligations once they leave college. The first objective for this group is to establish a savings program, which should represent approximately ten percent of their salary, and establish an emergency fund equal to six months’ salary. DELUX: What would you tell people who are considering college or just entering the job market? WM: I would tell them to get in there and get all of the education that they can. The opportunities will come in your life; your job is to be prepared when they do. The intangibles will be what make you a success, not just sheer intellect. Discipline, will, persistence, belief, faith. DELUX: I know you believe in giving back to the community. What do you have planned this upcoming year? WM: I will be working with Vashon High school here in St. Louis MO in the selection of two interns for the summer of 2015. For a personal consultation please contact: WALTER L MCKINNEY JR. McKinney Group Wealth President and CEO 3451 Saint Albans Rd Ste C PO BOX 136 Saint Albans, MO 63073 wmckinney@mgwealth.com 314-629-4685

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IS THIS HOW YOUR BANK SEES YOU? We don’t. We see you as an individual. With the guts to run a business. Which makes us curious how you do it. And how we, as your bank, can help you do it better. What makes your business special? What is its true potential? How do you actually get paid? It’s how we can generate ideas that work for you. Like integrated payables and receivables solutions that may help you improve cash flow. Or, perhaps, financing options you never knew existed. We don’t think a bank can do that without being curious. Learn more at 53.com/BusinessIdeas We’re Fifth Third Bank.

Deposit and credit products provided through Fifth Third Bank. Member FDIC. Equal Housing Lender. Lending is subject to credit review and approval.

DO MORE WITH YOUR MONEY

by Royce Sutton Senior Vice President, Fifth Third Bank

If your money plan is to have more and to do more with your money this year then use these 5 key foundational money pillars, listed in order of importance, to move yourself toward money growth and success: 1. BUILD SPENDING/SAVINGS PLAN - To garner money success you must have a spending/savings plan! Tell each dollar that you earn where you want it to go before your earn it. Make a list of each monthly expense, when they are due and be sure to update this list each month. Next, list all sources of income on your spending/savings plan. Your expense needs (housing, utilities, food, transportation, etc) are always listed first and expense wants are listed last. Your expenses are planned so that they do not exceed your income. By reviewing your plan each month and it becomes easier to say “yes” to those things in your plan and “no” to unnecessary wants. Carry less cash and leave your credit cards at home if you are tempted to damage your money plan. (If you want to get started now, reach out to your nearest Fifth Third Bank banker to get a copy of a monthly spending plan.) 2. BUILD YOUR CREDIT SCORE TO 700 OR HIGHER - Strong credit is your key to getting the best credit rate options, preferred insurance rates, improved housing choices, and some employers require a solid credit rating for you to be considered. Your credit score is your money finger print—it shows where you have been and how well you have handled your credit-identifying obligations. Those who have had credit missteps can raise their score by committing to paying their bills on-time and reducing their debt by paying more than the required minimum monthly payment.

3. REDUCE DEBT TO 43% OR LESS OF INCOME – When you reduce your debt level there is a resulting effect that gives you more money to save, invest, and provide for money stability. Money stress is the leading cause of relationship issues and it can lead to serious health issues. Do the work to reduce this stress by reducing your debt. Your money will grow faster when you have fewer debts. Reach out to reputable professional debt counseling, if necessary. 4. BUILD AN EMERGENCY FUND - While reducing your debt, consider how you can protect your money by building an asset protective hedge called an emergency fund. This fund is the total of 3 -6 months of expenses saved in a “don’t touch that” account that you will only use for true emergencies. When you build this fund, you will no longer have to use living expense money to pay for emergencies and you will have fewer emergencies that find you unprepared. 5. TAX PLANNING – Well developed money plans must include tax planning, because this allows you to maximize the value of your income and possibly reduce your tax burden. Working with a good tax professional that includes tax and retirement planning can make your money last 5-7 years longer in retirement.1 Those who are following these 5 money pillars are reaching their money goals and you will, too. Seek out professional money advice, commit to your money plan, review your plan regularly and you will succeed. 1. (Dana Anspach, “Five Keys to Financial Success”)

[FITNESS]

New Year, New You!

Hey you! I want to chat with you. There is no magic pill or pricey procedure that will answer the yearning inside of you. The desire for more will only come with you building you. You must participate in the construction of your health and wellness life. I want to share the answer with you: The answer is within YOU! Open up to health… and the universe with give back to you. Check out the following tips and live life with passion! Be well my friends. It’s all about YOU!

PERMISSION

WORDS BY: ANIKA PORTER

POUR

Pour into your health. Eat for life and not for death! Eating healthy comes with valuable rewards like confidence, self-validation, success and mental strength. Pour healthy food, healthy people and healthy conversations into yourself.

PEACE

Somehow and in some way, make peace with yourself and your life. Resolve issues that lead to unhealthy eating habits. Confront yourself and move on quickly.

PARADIGM SHIFT

Give yourself permission to invest in you. Re-create yourself into the person you have always wanted to be. Work toward the image of the new and improved you. Permit yourself to change! You have permission to indulge in your favorite vegetables and fruits. Permission to train and work out like a beast.

Be radical, relentless and race to win within. NOT for people, but for you.

PUSH

PULL

PLEASE

Give yourself time and be patient. Slow down and simplify the process. Do only what works for you. Take small measurable steps toward your goal.

Blow thru excuses and tear down the walls that hold you back. Push yourself to do a 5k, take a dance class, or climb a mountain. Push past the norm.

Declare war against yourself! Meaning: you will pull and drag yourself out of bed to work out every morning.

PRESS

Propel yourself to the other side. Get moving toward your goal, which is your new life. Focus and stay the course. Propel yourself into the renewed you.

When life gets rough - and it will - press harder toward your goals. Press your foot firm against the floor and press toward your goal. No more excuses. You can do it!

PURPOSE

Know that you are here for a purpose and you need to be healthy and fit to accomplish that purpose. Fulfill yourself through training, working out, and living a whole life. Be intentional - there is a purpose for your life. Don’t waste it.

PROPEL

BONUS: PURGE

Get rid of all negative people, activities, habits and anything that makes you feel bad about yourself!

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TIPS TO GET THE NICE GUY LAID

By: Orrin Carter Tweet him hello! @ODiggler

It is an age old truth: Nice guy finish last. Nice guys

don’t get the girl. Nice guys don’t get “any.” Or the latest trend: Bad boys ain’t no good, and good boys ain’t no fun. Thanks Mary J. I mean really. WTF? It’s a sad sad day when being a gentleman gets you desert dick. There used to be a time when it was almost mandatory for a guy to open a car door, send flowers, have a job, a car, and less than 2 baby mammas (Just playing. Kind of.) before a woman would even CONSIDER giving up the goodies. Now days it’s almost mandatory for you to ride big, smoke loud, and be in the music business SOMEWAY before a woman even considers speaking to you. I was once told that a woman knows whether she will sleep with a man within 5 seconds of meeting him. But I suspect it’s less than that, because these days I don’t think words are even needed to make that decision. Beyond the scientific part of attraction there are certain rules and regulations that nice guys at heart have to follow to get beyond the dreaded “friendship zone.” Because my friends, if you are trying to get you some, being in the “zone” is where you definitely don’t want to be. So I’ve compiled data from men and women, and found common ground to give you five tips to get you out of the “You are like my brother” and “I just see you as my friend” zone and get you into the good… TIP 1. ESTABLISH WHAT YOU WANT FROM THE BEGINNING For some reason, we nice guys think that if we are nice and sensitive to her “needs” that will get us in the door. If we allow her to talk about other guys and dates she has been on, she will begin to feel comfortable around us. This is true, but it is the wrong type of comfortable. She will see you as one of the “girls.” Let her know your intentions from the beginning. A woman once told me, “I don’t care if you just want sex if you’re straight up. You never know; that might be all I want too.” Fellas, women aren’t stupid. They can smell a scam a mile away. But if you’re selling them, “Girl, I just want to be there for you, be someone you can kick it with it, give you the sun and the moon,” BS, then you’ve

already lost, my friends. You’re an adult. It’s ok to say, “I’m not looking for a relationship. I just want to date.” Most likely, that’s what you want anyway. If you want something casual, SAY SO!!! If you want a relationship, SAY SO!!!! And treat each accordingly. You’re a man. She’s looking for you to lead, anyway. TIP 2. DON’T PROVE YOURSELF TO HER Most times, nice guys get stuck in a place where they are selling themselves to a woman instead of just being who they are. Always have the mindset: Who I am is enough. And if it’s not enough for her, then on to the next. Nice guys, never try to prove yourself to a woman. They sense it, and it is extremely unattractive. Never say or do things like these: 1. “If you were with me…” 2. Brag about what you can do in and out the bed 3. Be overly sensitive about small situations (Be a man at all times) 4. Look for constant reassurance (i.e.: “Did you miss me?”...”Did you think about me?”) 5. On a date, never let a woman choose the outing. It’s ok to ask, but always have your mind made up. You want to seem sure of yourself at all times. These are just examples but there are many things us nice guys do every day to “prove” to women why they should select us to smash. There is nothing wrong with “tailoring things to her likes,” but DO NOT change who you are. TIP 3. LOOK YOUR BEST AT ALL TIMES I don’t mean buy expensive clothes, because expensive clothes don’t and won’t make you look your best. What I mean is look neat, look polished, and look like you’re always headed out somewhere. Nice jeans. (Ironed. Yes I have to say that.) Clean shoes and shirt; doesn’t have to be name brand, just neat. Make an event no matter where you go until it becomes habit. And I shouldn’t have to talk about hygiene, but just in case, smell your best at all times too. TIP 4. DON’T BE A “YES MAN” Don’t agree with everything she freaking says!! Have

your own mind. Even if you do agree, debating on a friendly level is key for attraction. You want to have things in common, but you don’t want to seem like you only agree with her because you think it’s going get you to 2nd base. You having her mind instead of your own doesn’t get you to that golden city. In fact, it’s going to almost guarantee you never get the key. One of the main rules to attracting the opposite sex is conversation, and the more dialogue you have, the more things you can find out about her. A woman tells you EXACTLY how to get you laid. It’s just up to you to listen. TIP 5. DON’T BE A JACKASS, BUT DON’T BE A PUSH OVER At every stage of a relationship - all the way up to marriage - women test you to see how you react. How well you do with each test determines her respect level and how she treats you. Example: If you are set to go out on a date and she stands you up (I don’t mean a no call no show) I mean she keeps telling you she’s coming and after you’ve been where you two decided to meet for an extended period of time, she doesn’t show. She calls you and says sorry and changes the subject. (Yes that’s happen to me.) What you don’t do is: go off the deep end, curse her out, and get high and mighty. What you do is: let her know, “It’s not ok to stand me up, and next time (if there is a next time) let me know earlier.” Polite and respectful is the key, and from then on, DO NOT ASK HER OUT. Let her bring it up and take it from there. That’s just an example my friends, but the point I’m making is its ok to stand up for yourself if you feel disrespected - just as she would. It’s all in how you handle the situation. In conclusion, there are countless ways to get her to fix you breakfast in the morning. But the bottom line is being ok with who you are enough to know that “she” is not the only fish in the sea. Practice makes improvement. Talk to as many women as you can until you feel comfortable with rejection enough to not worry about being rejected in any situation.

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Winter Skin Let It Glow

top wishing for supple, smooth, glowing winter skin and claim it as your own! Winter humidity is lower than other seasons, so when the temperature drops, there is literally less water in the air. This can leave our skin feeling chapped, dry, flaky and without moisture. Here are a few winter skincare tips that will help you maintain skin that is healthy and polished during the harshest weather of the year.

1: Cleanse

The first step to any healthy skin routine is to begin with the proper cleanser. Your winter skin routine shouldn’t be any different. If your skin is dry to begin with, you should be using a creamy cleanser, such as PCA Skin Creamy Cleanser ($29) or Naturopathica Chamomile Cleansing Milk ($28). These are gentle, hydrating cleansers that will effectively remove dirt, debris and makeup without stripping the skin of essential moisture. If you have normal, combination or oily skin, a gel cleanser will work best, such as Dermalogica Special Cleansing Gel ($36) or Le Mieux Phyto-Nutrient Cleansing Gel ($24). These foaming gel cleansers can be refreshing and remove impurities without disturbing the skin’s natural moisture balance.

2: Exfoliate

The best way to avoid the flaky, dull skin of winter is to exfoliate, exfoliate, exfoliate! As the temperature drops, it’s the perfect time to try a new facial scrub. The key to the best winter skin is to boost up your exfoliation routine without overdoing it.

Just one use of a facial scrub, such as Dr. Brandt Microdermabrasion Skin Exfoliant ($78) or Olay Regenerist Thermal Mini Peel ($23), can leave your skin instantly brighter and smoother – but too much exfoliation can create irritation, inflammation and dryness, negating the positive effects you saw in the first place. Therefore, limit your use of these types of scrubs to two or three times a week no matter what the manufacturer of the product recommends. For a fantastic daily exfoliator, try Dermalogica Daily Microfoliant ($52). This is a very gentle brightening powder that will give you smoother skin without the worry of irritation.

3: Repair

In the summer, dark spots get darker and redness gets worse. The winter is a great time to repair the damage left behind from summer sun exposure. If you have dark spots, some of the best products to look for are those containing kojic acid or arbutin. These key ingredients go after the cells in the skin that are making too much color and help to tone them down without affecting skin tone. A great product to try that contains both of these ingredients is Theraderm Enlighten Skin Brightener ($47). This is a non-irritating serum that can be used daily. Another potent skin lightener is hydroquinone, which is used to lighten dark patches on the skin. Great over-thecounter products to try with hydroquinone are PCA Skin Pigment Gel ($53) or Black and White Bleaching Cream with Hydroquinone ($7). For the delicate eye are, I recommend products such as Naturopathica Vitamin K Brightening Eye

Serum ($72) or DHC Eye Bright ($23) that help to diminish the appearance of dark circles while offering light-refracting ingredients to give you the immediate appearance of brighter skin.

4: Moisturize

That light facial moisturizer that got you through the summer heat will likely not cut it through winter’s frost. A thicker formula is needed to bind the skin, withhold water, and keep your skin from becoming overly irritated. During the day, you should be using a creamier moisturizer containing ingredients such as hyaluronic acid and glycerin that will soften the skin and help to retain moisture without leaving your face looking and feeling greasy. Some top recommendations are Naturopathica Cassis Ultra Replenishing Cream ($85) and Algenist Regenerative Anti-Aging Moisturizer ($90). It’s also essential that you add in a facial night cream during the winter. This will drastically improve the moisture level in your skin when used regularly. Formulas such as Perricone MD Concentrated Restorative Treatment ($105) and SkinCeuticals Renew Overnight Cream ($61) contain retinol, glycolic acid or lactic acid that help to smooth your skin so that it’s softer and brighter by morning. Follow these key steps and you’ll be glowing all year long! Submitted by April Whittington, LE Licensed Esthetician and Owner of Skin By April www.skinbyapril.com skinbyapril@gmail.com www.facebook.com/april.whittingtonle

WHO ARE YOU, PART 3:

REINVENTING YOURSELF By: Karen Banks, M.Ed., PLPC, Therapist & Owner of Trinity Wellness, LLC

In wrapping up this three-part series on discovering yourself, it seems important to talk about how to put the changes you desire into practice, and live your redefined or newly discovered self. While this list of suggestions is not exhaustive, it offers a starting point for ways to continue reinventing yourself. The first and most important step to reinvention is to find your motivation. Why are you seeking change? Focus on intrinsic values and not external factors. This is a great time to make a new vision board so your intentions are always in front of you. (Whether you choose a vision board or a journal, you MUST put your goals in writing!) Know who you are and who you want to be and work to get those aligned. As mentioned in the past two articles, find your values and work to live them daily. Expect to stumble and fall back into old habits but don’t beat yourself up; change is hard work! Practice, practice, practice. Living life is about just that: LIVING life. Practicing who we want to become leads not to perfection as the adage goes, but it forms us. The more we spend time practicing our new self, we are refining our life and it becomes a part of us. Life is about growth and experiences, there is no final destination. Take this time to educate yourself. Whether you choose formal education or to simply read something new, there is a myriad of information available to you. Read about other people who have reinvented themselves, learn about some of the most successful people on the planet, discover new ways to do things. Learn about what has helped other people and it will surely offer some instruction and encouragement.

Surrounding yourself with people who respect your goals and can offer some constructive and honest guidance will be a big help. This is a great time to grow your personal and professional network to find those people who either are already a part of your life or should be in your circle. Reinventing yourself also means that some existing relationships may need to be reevaluated. A big part of who you are is reflected in your inner circle. Try some new things to help you reach your goals. Maybe try some reiki healing or having your chakras aligned. Go for a walk or a nature hike. Commit to being a vegetarian for a month to see if you can experience some enlightenment. You never know what might appeal to you and help you along your journey until you try it. Finally, consider all factors during this process. Do you need to change your look, walk, talk, job, or surroundings as well? While some of these things might seem trivial, when we look good, we feel good. Could a bold new lipstick or outfit help change your outlook on life? Maybe a job more aligned with your values could propel you to bliss. This reinvention is about saying yes to new opportunities that might help you become YOU. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes and changes as you continue to grow. Worrying about if others will perceive you as “acting brand new” or being fake is not helpful. Furthermore, what other people think is no concern of yours. Only you know your path and making a concerted effort every day to walk your own path is the best way to live as the new and improved you! Best of luck on this part of your journey. If you find you would like some personal guidance, reach out to me at info@trinitywellness. org. If you would like to share encouragement or your success, tweet about it @TrinityWellSTL

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LISA WU

Let’s talk Lisa. Whooooo Lisa Wu! She’s stunning, ambitious, talented, and yet down to earth and authentic. As one of our favorite reality television personalities, Lisa comes across on screen as relatable and funny - like a best friend. And when we had the opportunity to speak with her, she far exceeded our expectations. Her luminous spirit shines, and we love her even more. Delux readers: meet Lisa Wu! Delux: We love your new reality show, “Hollywood Diva” on TV One. What else have you been up to since Bravo’s Atlanta Housewives? Wu: Writing movies and producing them as well. I’ve been doing a lot of acting in other people’s projects. I’ve actually formed a company with Re’Shaun Frear. He’s my co- partner in Indiewood films. We have a slate of films that we are producing at the top of the year. One of the films is called Mississippi Wild. We’re still doing Further From Here. We’re making some cast changes. Another film is Bowl of Cherries. These are theatrical, bigger budget films. I’ll also be doing some independent, straight to DVD films that I have written. Delux: How does Atlanta Housewives differ from Hollywood Diva? Wu: Basically, we created a show on a show. That hasn’t been done before. All five ladies are actresses or producers. We all took control of our own destinies and created projects that created jobs—not only for ourselves but for the crew. The caliber of women is different. Normally you don’t see actresses open up their lives like that. They are normally playing characters as opposed to allowing you in their space. So you get to see who they really are as opposed to who they are playing. Delux: Do you think that you are in your element with Hollywood Diva than with Atlanta Housewives? Wu: Absolutely. I love it. It’s just a different type of reality show. It’s funny because one of my cast mates, Golden, said that she doesn’t like reality shows. But it is a reality show. Again, it’s just a different type of reality show. Of course there’s bickering and the butting of heads. You have five strong women who are very opinionated and set in their ways on how they want to do things. But we come together and we get it done. Delux: What brings you back to the reality TV realm? Wu: Well it was an opprtunity that was presented to me. It just made sense because a lot of people didn’t know that I started out writing and producing plays. A lot of people thought that I was just on the Housewives of Atlanta and that was the extent of me being in entertainment. They had no idea that I was a behind the scenes type of person and that I’ve been doing this for over 20 years. I did it for that purpose—to let the world know that I’m back home. Delux: What do you think of the reviews of the show thus far? Wu: People love it! Some people say that they don’t usually watch reality television shows but this show is addictive. We broke a lot of records. The ratings were through the roof. That’s why there’s going to be a season two. I knew that it would be successful because it’s a different kind of show. Delux: What does true success look like for you? Wu: Success is getting paid doing what you love and pursuing your passion. It’s truly finding fulfilment in the things that you really want to do. A lot of people are successful but they hate their jobs. For me it’s doing what you love to do and getting paid to do what you love. Delux: It seems like that’s what you are doing now. It seems like you are in a good place. Wu: I am. What’s that saying? Whatever you would do for free that’s your passion. It’s not a lot of work for me. When I start listing all these projects and telling people what I’m doing, they say, “Oh my God. That’s so much!” But for me I’m doing what I love. If I could write movies while I was asleep, I would because it’s fun for me. It’s not a lot of work. It’s great. It’s really taking [my] destiny into [my] own hands. I don’t wait for roles. I don’t wait for someone to call me up and say, “Hey Lisa, I have this movie for you.” I create projects. That’s essentially why I started writing over 20 years ago. I knew that then. I create jobs for other people. Delux: You’re absolutely gorgeous! What is your secret to your silky skin? What are some of your favorite products, or what is your no-fail beauty regiment for your flawless glow? Wu: Tons of water and really moisturizing. A clean diet works wonders. If your heart is in the right place and when you are in a good place spiritually and emotionally, then I think that others see that. When people look unhappy and spiritually they’re not together or at peace, then their skin is not right. Being in the right place has a lot to do with it. Delux: How much water do you drink every day? Wu: Half my weight in ounces. I drink a gallon of water a day. I eat a lot of berries too, like blueberries and raspberries.

32 JANUARY | FEBRUARY 2015 www.DeluxMag.com

DELUXCOVER

Pursue your passion and stay true to who you are. Always have integrity and give back as much as you can. Help the next person. I find that people are just into what they want to do. They don’t take time to lend a hand to help someone else get to that level. I believe in opening doors for people. If I can create a path for people to come through or help them, I do it. Then the people [who I help] say, “I owe you this.” I tell them: “You don’t owe me, just help somebody else out.” Delux: Are you currently involved in any philanthropy? Wu: My platform is domestic violence and self-esteem. I’m always feeding the hungry and the homeless year round. It’s not something that I broadcast. It’s just part of my make-up or personality. I also mentor a lot of young girls. I always try to give back. Delux: Do you have an organization of your own that deals with domestic violence? Wu: No. I speak at colleges and churches. [Because I’ve been] in the industry over the years, people reach out to me for advice. Along the way, I’ve picked up a few girls that I mentor. I’m very hands on, so I don’t take on too many people. I like to be there when they need me. I really don’t have an organization. In my daily life if people reach out and there’s a need, I try to help if I can. Delux: So it’s a personal thing? Wu: Yeah. I’m very hands on. They call me a lot and I make sure that I’m present. I don’t like doing everything in front of the cameras. I’ve parked my truck then jumped out and fed the homeless and handed out blankets. When’s it’s a natural thing, it’s just what you do. You don’t need attention or a pat on the back. It’s not something out of the ordinary for me. I do it all the time. Delux: Is someone in your life that helped you along? Wu: I can’t say there was. I have a strong belief in Christ. I’m a Christian. I’ve always been this way. I’ve had a lot of bruises and bumps along the road. I’ve had to figure it out on my own. I think that’s why I’m so passionate about sharing that information. It’s invaluable. I’ve lost money. I’ve made a lot of money. So I think that if I can share that information and keep people from making some mistakes then why not? A lot of people

[in the entertainment industry] don’t share information as often as they should. I see a lot of my peers who could open up doors for different people, but they just don’t. I think that’s unfortunate because when you are truly blessed you should be a blessing to others. Delux: Is it difficult for people to stay real within the constraints of reality television? Wu: I think a lot of people feel the need to perform. I’m just not willing to do that. I’m never going to sell out. I’m always going to have integrity. I need to look at myself in the mirror and like who I see. I ’m always genuine. I say exactly what I feel. But others are excited to be on camera, so they perform. I don’t know how they look at themselves in the mirror and they’re okay with what they see. It’s not real. It’s unfortunate that they think they have to [act fake] to be on the show. They feel that it’s necessary. It’s unfortunate because you have young girls watching this and thinking that’s the way to act. So when they get on television, they act the same way. Then they start fighting. It’s unfortunate because you don’t have to do that to get ahead or be relevant. Delux: We know you’ve been involved in fashion & beauty business ventures. Do you have any plans for future products or clothing lines? Wu: I’m really just focusing on acting and producing and writing. I’ve written books as well. You shouldn’t spread yourself too thin. Anything I do, I have to believe in it. When the right opportunity presents itself, and it’s in line with my brand, then I’ll do it. But at the moment I’m just concentrating on producing and writing.

Photography: AG Photography Lead Stylist and Creative Director: Letitia Young Wardrobe Styling Assistant and Set Director: Ashley Williams Jewelry and Accessories: Yoro Designs Make Up Artist: Ley Woods, Cocktailz: A Beauty Bar Hair Stylist: Angie Renee Models: Sheridan Young & Lauron Thompson Shot on Location at Enchanting Embellishments

Blissful...

As wedding season is quickly approaching, brides everywhere are scrambling to find the PERFECT Dress for their big day. This seasonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s bride chooses colorful and couture gowns to don down the aisle.

Dress: Red & Black Cocktail gown by Shukuru Couture, St. Louis, MO www.shukurucouture.com Shoes: Bronx Diba, Earth City, MO 314-373-1280 Earrings: Hyper Haute by Erika Dunk, Available at Honeyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Child Boutique

Angelica Gown by Trang Nguyen Designs www.trangN. com For appointments email trangnguyenfashion@gmail.com or call 314-687-2640

36 JANUARY | FEBRUARY 2015 www.DeluxMag.com

The Duchess Dress by Sydneyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Closet www.sydneyscloset.com for appointments call 314-3445066

Rosalia Gown by Trang Nguyen Designs www.trangN.com For appointments email trangnguyenfashion@gmail.com or call 314687-2640

38 JANUARY | FEBRUARY 2015 www.DeluxMag.com

Tulle Fairy Gown by Lauren Bander Designs www.laurenbander.com

Hugs and Kisses by Sydneyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Closet www.sydneyscloset. com for appointments call 314-344-5066

40 JANUARY | FEBRUARY 2015 www.DeluxMag.com

Blush and Lace Gown by Sydneyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Closet www. sydneyscloset.com for appointments call 314-3445066

Bride: Halima K. Redding, 37, Human Resources Director Groom: Jason E. McWilliams, 34, Physical Security Officer How They Got Engaged: Jason proposed in his apartment or as Halima lovingly refers to it, “The New York nook” on New Year’s Eve 2012 Married on: December 27, 2013 Wedding Location: St. Louis, Missouri

KNOTS. 42 JANUARY | FEBRUARY 2015 www.DeluxMag.com

DELUX WEDDINGS

2015 Wedding Guide

Wanna add your business to The DELUX Wedding Directory? Contact us today. Place your brand in front of DELUX readers all year!!! email Ads@deluxmag.com

Wedding Planners Photographers

Make Up Artist

Cakes/Caterers

AR EVENT PLANNING 1113 Wooden Dr., Florissant, 773-457-1852 www. mydivineevents.com

AG PHOTOGRAPHY 7 North Oaks Plaza, Saint Louis, 314-669-4657 www.Agohotosonline.com.com

CLASSY FACES Classyfacesmakeup@ gmail.com, Saint Louis, 314-304-6992 www.styleseat.com/candacegardner.com

CAKES BY NETTE 1130 N Florissant, Ferguson, 314-562-7193 www.cakebynettecom

DIVINE EVENTS 11425 Dorsett Rd #202, Maryland Heights, 314-805-3587 www.mydivineevents.com

LB PHOTOGRAPHY Saint Louis, 314445-9718 www.lbfoto1.com

TARA LOWERY 1430 Washington Ave 105, St Louis, 314-805-3587 www.Taralowerymakeup.com

ICED IMPRESSIONS 1111 Arsenal Ave, Saint Louis, (314) 219-9272 www.facebook.com /IcedImpressions

STYLE COUTURE EVENTS 5335 Highway N, Cottleville, 314-479-3204 www.stylecoutureevents.com

MCARTHUR PHOTOGRAPHY, Saint Louis, 843-324-5432 www.mcarthurphotography25.com

NETTIE KELLY 3840 Washington Ave Studio 218, Saint Louis, 314-498-6299 www.nkmakeupstudio.com

SweetArt 2203 South 39th Street, St. Louis, 314-771-4278 www.sweetartstl.com

KAYDIS EVENT PLANNING, Saint Louis, 314-458-6425 www.kaydis.com

LANCE THURMAN 2609 S. Kingshighway, Saint Louis, 314-368-3599 www.lancethurman.com

Florists

La Patisserie Chouquette 1626 Tower Grove St Louis 314-805-3587 www.simonefaure.com

6 DEGREES EVENT PLANNING, Maryland Heights, 314-229-8007 www.6devents.com

SUTBERRY PHOTOGRAPHY Saint Louis/ Illinois 618-406-0041 www.sutberryphotographyblog.com

The Rebel Florist 1414 Park Ave St. Louis, 314-962-3232 www.therebelflorist.com

Sugaree Baking Company 1242 Tamm Avenue St. Louis, 314-645-5496 www.sugareebaking.com

Bella Daydream Events St. Louis, 314-537-1739 www.bella-daydreams.com

iDEX PHOTOGRAPHY, Saint Louis/ Illinois 618-407-3288 www.dexine.me

Artistry Florist & Event Design 2734 LaSalle Street, St. Louis 314-772-1301 www.artistryflorist.com

La Bonne Bouchee 12344 Olive Blvd Creve Coeur 314-576-6606 www.labonnebouchee.com

Simcha’s Events 55 Chaminade Drive St. Louis, 314-458-5463 www.simchasevents.com

JOSEPH CAMPBELL Saint Louis/Kansas City/ Mid-Missouri Area 314-805-3587 www.josephncampbell.com

Wildflowers 1013 Ohio Avenue St. Louis, 314-772-9900 www.wildflowersstl.com

Sarah’s Cake Shop 10 Clarkson Wilson Centre - Chesterfield, 314-728-1140 www.sarahscakeshopstl.com

Cosmopolitan Events 18132 Big Bend Boulevard St. Louis 314-249-9107 www.cosmopolitanevents.com

CEDRIC SCOTT PHOTOGRAPHY 3840 Washington Av 218, Saint Louis , 314363-6303 cedricscottphotography.com

The Special Events Florist Call for Consult. Saint Louis, 314-845-3362 thespecialeventflorist.com

The Sweet Divine 1801 S 9th St St. Louis, 636-942-2900 www.thesweetdivine.com

THE BRIDE & GROOM DELUX MAGAZINEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S WEDDING SERIES Bride: Brittany Wallace, 27, Registered Nurse Groom: Cameron L. Cobb, 29, Advertiser Married on: October 24th, 2014 Wedding Location: Lumen - St. Louis, Missouri

INTRODUCING MR & MRS COBB In the late summer of 2006 during a freshman movein event at Southern llinois University Edwardsville, I was approached by two lovely young ladies in need of help finding their new dorm room. I immediately turned on my charm for one of these young ladies, only to find out that she was the mother of the student moving in. The other young lady played a more relaxed and observant role that evening, never eluding to the fact that she would choose me as her future husband. Brief exchanges about the humorous and embarrassing event elevated to frequent casual conversations with the freshman nursing major over the next few months. From conversations to flirting. Then from flirting to messaging (she the initiator, of course). Messages then turned into meetings. The pot went from lukewarm to boiling very fast. After discovering that each of our diffences would manifest as each others supplement, our chemistry grew quicker. Our appreciation for the arts also 44 JANUARY | FEBRUARY 2015 www.DeluxMag.com

helped solidify the foundation of our relationship. She was a student and teacher of competitive dance. I, with a decimal of dance skill, was a former janitor at a dance studio in my hometown and a performer at greek stepshows(06). We became inseparable. We committed to each other shortly after in the spring of 2007, later to give birth to our first child Carter in 2010. the proposal. We knew that what we had was something that would last long term. We also agreed that in order to achieve forever, we had to place our faith at the forefront of our relationship. Did she give me an ultimatum? Not quite. Did she explicitly set the expectation? Absolutely! The fact that these expectations, however, matched my intentions made the next step a bit easier. Approaching the 7th year of our relationship, it was obvious that she could predict my every move and pick apart any surprises. I decided to propose in the comfort of our living room

with our son as my accomplice. It was a simple and intimate occasion. the wedding. We chose October, the peak of wedding season, as the month to commit before Christ, attributing the month of our first date. Attracted to the clean yet classic moldings and columns accentuated by premium lighting, we chose Lumen Event Space in the Locust Business District for the ceremony and reception. We hired our good friends at Build A Wedding to help us plan an event that clasically blended the big city visions of a Chicago groom and the hospitality of a St. Louis Bride. We celebrated the best night of our life together in the company of our valued family and friends. Plans have been made to celebrate our honeymoon in Cabo in the early part of 2015.

BRITTANY STARKS: BUILDING WEDDINGS How did you get started as a wedding planner? • My own wedding mistakes and lots and lots of prayer. I literally fell into this profession. I developed a love for the process of wedding planning and my own wedding gave me a chance to see how I could have done things better. I never dreamed of planning weddings. This was one of those circumstances where God takes you and links you to your purpose. He took what was already in me and showed me how to apply it to wedding planning. It worked – and I’ve never looked back. Describe what makes a great wedding planner: • The Big 3 for me are Project Management, Risk Management, and Good Communication. My background in account and project management played a major role in how I operate Build A Wedding. Every wedding is a project and I treat it like one. They require time, organization, and relationship building. For most couples, it’ll be the largest party they’ve ever thrown – and that’s stressful. A great planner asks the questions you’ll never think to ask yourself. We manage risks to protect our clients from mishaps and to cover them from all ends. To cover them, we’ve got to know them. On the wedding day, we take on “the brain” of our bride and groom. Unless there’s a huge technical glitch, we make every effort to respond to emails and voicemails within 24 business hours. The running joke in our office is that all of our brides become our BFFs. We spend a tremendous amount of time with them and responding/sending emails – and after awhile, they do become our really great friends. How important is it to hire a planner for your big day? Tell us why. • It’s essential. Time and time again, we see brides try and cut corners by asking a friend of the family or a creative aunt to help them plan and coordinate their wedding – and it typically blows up in their 46 JANUARY | FEBRUARY 2015 www.DeluxMag.com

face. It’s like going to court to plead your case about something, paying the court fees, and bringing along your friend in lieu of an attorney. They don’t know the law, they lack the expertise, and don’t have a firm to provide you with any resources. Wedding planners work with vendors all the time, we know how to review your contracts to prevent costly mistakes, and understand what it means to provide a worthwhile “guest experience”. Our clients always tell us it was worth every single penny. What challenges do you often run into as a wedding coordinator? How do you overcome those obstacles? • E-MO-TIONS! Weddings are natural emotion tuggers and we know that. You’re spending lots of money based on feelings (Cousin Susie asked for an invite to the wedding, but you can probably count on one hand how many times you’ve had a conversation with her…but your Mom insists you send her an invitation, and you can’t let down Mom.) Weddings can be sticky, but it’s our job to be your voice of reason and advocate. We often double as therapists and that sometimes presents a challenge. However, things always work out because we remain transparent and honest with our clients throughout the entire process. What makes St. Louis a great place to have a wedding? What are some of your favorite St. Louis Venues? • It’s so underrated! St. Louis is spilling over with old and new neighborhoods filled with character – so many hidden gems. I love Sqwires Annex in Lafayette Square. It’s in a great St. Louis neighborhood and the exposed brick and concrete floors gives it a modern loft feel.

Tell us about your Build A Wedding Staff and the roles they play in making BAW successful. • We have the best staff in St. Louis!! Our gem of a Wedding Coordinator is Candace Hall. Candace is the real MVP. She’s normally the first one a bride or groom talks to when they contact Build A Wedding. She listens to the needs and the wants of the couple, gathers the vendors, and begins bringing the couple’s vision to life. Candace works very closely with the couple in the planning stage and is there during execution as well. In the words of Shakespeare, “Though she be but little, she is FIERCE!” Jenna Collins is the DIYer on our team and “the patient one”. Jenna has made a name for herself for detangling the most difficult of garland. We also have a top notch set up and break down crew that seamlessly turns venues into swoonworthy wedding receptions. Everyone’s talents are brought to the table to make BAW successful and I wouldn’t trade my team for the world! How about a few words of wisdom for future Brides: • Back away from Pinterest and the towering stack of wedding magazines. Allow your wedding day to reflect your love well and it will be perfect. Some of the best weddings are the most modestly priced. Also, we can’t forget about our grooms, any advice for them? • You may not remember your anniversary, but you’ll remember how you felt when you married your better half. Provide input about how you envision your wedding day. We know you’re only pretending not to care. And for newlyweds overall, any advice for them to help them enjoy the big day? • Don’t sweat the small stuff (pay someone else to sweat and hire a wedding planner)!

A very special place for an engagement party, bridal shower, or intimate reception. The romantic, victorian-style Tea Room is perfect for your special day. Call for group pricing and availability. Special event times are available after regular business hours.

4732 McPherson Ave. St. Louis, MO 63108 (inside Enchanting Embellishments) The tea room is open for lunch everyday from 11am - 4pm

theVENUE

where the TRUE magic happens

KUHS ESTATE AND FARM

THE JEWEL BOX

WORLD’S FAIR PAVILION

Built on the bluffs of the Missouri River in the early part of the last century, Kuhs Estate is a rare find of 150 acres within a half hour of central and downtown St. Louis. With an amazing selection of spaces and scenic backdrops, as well as decor and theme items for day rental to make whatever you’re planning, beyond memorable.

The Jewel Box has opened after a $3.5 million renovation, which makes it an even better site for weddings. The 11-month renovation included replacing the mechanical systems and adding air conditioning so it will be comfortable in the summer months.A catering room, a large bride’s room and new restrooms have been built so the building can be rented for wedding ceremonies, wedding receptions and other catered events.

Sitting high atop Government Hill, the World’s Fair Pavilion commands a dramatic view of Forest Park.

Location: 5600 Clayton Ave, St. Louis, MO 63110 Phone: 314-289-5344

Location: 13080 Spanish Pond Road, 63138 Phone: 314-226-0709 Website: http://www.kuhsfarm.com/

The World’s Fair Pavilion provides a picturesque setting for company picnics, private receptions, benefits, special events or parties. The covered floor area of the open air pavilion can seat approximately 500 people. Larger crowds can be accommodated if the accompanying park grounds are used.

THE THAXTON

NEO ON LOCUST

CITY MUSEUM

The Thaxton can accommodate up to 200 people for cocktail style events and 120 for sit down gatherings. In addition, we have a number of caterers for you to choose from. From simple and elegant to lavishly extravagant, you can creaet a day that is tailor made for you.

In the 1920’s and 1930’s, Locust Street was known as “Auto Row”. Various makes and models of automobiles were shown and warehoused by distributors and dealers in the buildings along Locust Street. The building at 2801 Locust Street was home to the Mississippi Valley Motor Company, the distributor of the first Oakland Pontiac automobile in St. Louis.

Sitting high atop Government Hill, the World’s Fair Pavilion commands a dramatic view of Forest Park.

Location: 2801 Locust St., St. Louis, MO 63103 Phone: info@neostl.com

Location: 5600 Clayton Ave, St. Louis, MO 63110 Phone: 314-289-5344

Location: 1009 Olive St., St. Louis, MO 63101 Phone: 314-323-3146 Website: http://www.thethaxton.com

ALTAR Your Wedding Perspective

DELUX MAGAZINE WEDDING SERIES

“C’est la vie,” say the old folks. Goes to show you never can tell. - Chuck Berry

Being a modern bride is all about marching to your own beat, doing your own thing, and doing your “I do” in a way that feels right for the two of you. So many couples are celebrating in their own way, and living with the courage to be who they are. Tattoos never cease to be an interesting conversation with many bride & grooms. Some are psyched to show them off while others are wishing they did not have certain images in certain places. Regardless of the reason, they are a much larger topic today than even five years ago. It is yet another lifestyle trend which is boasting an impact on wedding planning, and everyone is making up the rules on the fly. Ink is not only for the black-veil brides. Though black-veil brides do rock, and we love them, there are more and more classic weddings with an alterna-twist. Without fear of pearlclutching elders, many couples are walking down the

aisle showing off their ink. The juxtaposition of haute tattoos against the sweet and innocent bridal white is pure aesthetic poetry. Today’s bride is rocking her tat with pride, and refusing to destroy her heirloom dress with Dermablend. The thought of airbrushing the photos is equally horrifying. Beauty is skin deep – and skin is all some people ever see. Thankfully in 2015, the acceptance of individuality shining through is blossoming and better than ever. Show off the spunky side of your personality! Here are 3 goodies to help you show off your altar ink and get your guests in the groove – if you so choose! 1: Because it’s not truly a party until someone breaks out the temporary tattoos: Get some for your bridesmaids and be creative, edgy, and have fun with

placement for your photo shoots.

2: Embrace other cultures: Hire a Henna Mehndi Tattoo Artist for your bridal party. 3: Do one better: Have a temporary tattoo parlor set up at your wedding reception. Placed next to the mechanical bull or bounce castle, it’s sure to be a huge hit!

DELUX MAGAZINE WEDDING SERIES

f you told your friends that you were spending $5,000 on a dress, they’d probably give you the side eye. If you told your sister that you were footing a $10,000 bill for a party menu, she’d give you the side eye and tell your mother she was right about you being crazy. But for some reason, when we factor in the word ‘wedding,’ it legitimizes blowing the bank on every detail. Throwing your fantasy nuptials doesn’t have to be pricey if you devise a frugally fabulous strategy. DON’T USE THE ‘W’ WORD Resist the urge to refer to your wedding as your wedding when you’re talking to vendors. Fees ramp 20-30 percent because they know people will pay big money for their big day, warns Kathryn Finney whose website, The Budget Fashionista, is a haven for stylish and savings-savvy shoppers. “When you go to the florist or the reception hall, just say it’s a party. You’re having a party instead of a wedding reception,” she coaches. “If you can, have the flowers delivered to your house because it makes a huge cost difference. The number one rule: don’t mention ‘wedding.’”

THE BUDGET

Keeping it 100

SAMPLE THE OFF-THE-RACK OFFERINGS Finding the perfect gown is the easy part. Affording it is quite another. That’s where sample sales come in, when stores sell designer dresses at major discounts. “We sold gowns this summer for as low as $49 and $99,” shares Pamela Smith, owner of Louisa’s Bridal in Elizabeth City, NC. “Many of the brides purchased them for their weddings as well as their ‘Trash the Dress’ photo sessions.” Vera Wang for $600? Now that’s a reason to say ‘I do.’ PRETTY GIRLS ROCK “Everyone says they can do makeup,” Finney says with a chuckle. And don’t we all have horror stories about some friend of a friend or well-meaning relative whose supposed skill left you looking a hot mess? “Your hair and makeup might be one area you should spend money on because of pictures. That being said,” she adds, “hair pieces are a great way for you to get the look without spending a lot.” Going to the beauty shop the morning of your wedding will save the expense of having your stylist on hand—at an hourly rate—while you’re prepping to walk down the aisle. GREAT SAVINGS IN (THE SAME) STORE According to Smith, there are savings in store if the bride and her band of maids and matrons purchase their gowns from the same boutique. “If there are more than five in the wedding party, they’ll receive some sort of discount, either off the gown itself or off alterations to the gown,” she says. She warns online sales shoppers to consider the expenses

of purchasing gowns sight unseen, only to be disappointed in size, color, fabric or design—and be forced to spend the time and money to send them back. SAVE A DIFFERENT DATE Think about having your celebration on a Friday, a Sunday or even a weekday evening. “And if you have it on the Sunday before a holiday weekend— for example, Memorial Day or Labor Day—you’ll save quite a bit,” says Finney. “You can turn it into a fun weekend and it may be less expensive for relatives coming from out of town because they’ll go home on the holiday. Sometimes that can lower prices.” This played out at Finney’s own Philadelphia wedding when she saved 50 percent by having it on both a Sunday and a holiday weekend. GRAB A GLUE GUN AND GET CRAFTY Fresh flowers are beautiful but ridiculously expensive. “Bouquets can run up to $500, but you can go to Wal-mart and get some silk flowers. No one’s really going to know the difference,” Finney assures. She learned the hard way. “My bouquet was so expensive. Then my best friend got married, and we went to the dollar store and made bouquets for everyone. The total cost was about 1/4 of the cost of just my bouquet.” That’s well worth whipping out faux orchids and hydrangeas. Using these strategies can help you stay true to your frugal budget. Courtesy of BB&G

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