7 minute read
THRESHOLD WORK
By Samantha Jones
At the age of 21, I had my first child. In those early days, I found myself navigating the sleepless nights and shouldering the tremendous responsibility of providing and nurturing a child all on my own. While it was a challenging experience, it turned out that I had a knack for it, and I loved the role of momma. Little did I know, motherhood would become my greatest life and leadership coach, teaching me invaluable lessons along the way.
Looking back, one of the most significant lessons I learned during my journey as a mother is what I now refer to as “Threshold Work.” This concept emerged from my moments of transitioning between work and home. I realized that if I didn’t pause at the threshold of either realm and address what I was bringing with me, things could easily turn sideways, and I might not be operating as the truest essence of myself.
I vividly recall a particular moment from “back in the day.” It was one of those days when everything seemed to go wrong. I had a tough day at the practice. Every appointment seemed to run behind. The doctor was in a terrible mood and unable to control his emotions. The technology wasn’t cooperating, and on top of all that, I wasn’t feeling well myself. As the end of the day approached, I dreaded leaving my job, knowing I had to rush to pick up my baby from daycare, only to return to my tiny apartment for a quick, unsatisfying meal so I could head off to my next job of cleaning dental practices in my community. But before leaving the house, I had to gather all the things that would allow me to execute the second job with Baby Boy Jordan attached to the front side of my body in the kiddo carrier. Yes, that’s right, I vacuumed and polished with baby J in tow. All of this to provide and prevent myself from becoming a statistic. These 14-hour days and the balancing act of work, motherhood, poor culture in the work environment, no money, and fatigue were hard. Exhaustion had taken its toll on me.
When I finally arrived at my son’s daycare to pick him up, I was short-tempered and uninterested in the artwork he proudly showed me. He was little and fragile. I led him to question if I liked his artwork. What had I just imprinted on my child because I was distracted, not present, or fully self-aware? Tired and unconsciously showing up to mother him. It was a version of me that I was not proud of, and it took that very moment to make me realize something profound. Regardless of what burdens I carried, it took no more energy to be fully present and cherish the moments right in front of me than it did to be distracted and bitter about the peripheral things in my life.
This newfound awareness sparked a concept that now forms the basis of a topic I teach within my company that I have named - “Threshold Work.” I often hear leaders expressing their desire for their employees to “leave it at the door” when it comes to personal matters. However, I have come to understand that completely separating personal and professional lives is impossible. Baggage, emotions, problems, and feelings inevitably cross the threshold, no matter how hard we try to keep them at bay.
Instead of resisting this truth of human nature, I believe in embracing it and doing the necessary “Threshold Work.” This practice involves acknowledging and addressing our own personal challenges while still striving to be the best versions of ourselves before crossing the proverbial thresholds in our lives. If we all developed deep selfawareness and took control of our own stuff, I believe our world would change for the better. By leading the charge in cultivating a culture of deep self-reflection and threshold work, we create an environment where people are respected for their courage in facing their personal struggles while still leaning into the best versions of themselves.
Throughout my journey, I have realized that each threshold we encounter in life presents an opportunity for growth and transformation. Whether it’s the transition from work to home, or any other significant change, taking a moment to pause, reflect, and consciously shift our mindset can have a profound impact on ourselves and those around us.
As I continue to navigate the beautiful chaos of motherhood, I find solace in knowing that every threshold crossed is a chance to embrace the present moment, lean into gratitude, and be a source of positivity in the lives of those around me.
Motherhood has taught me that no matter what challenges we face, we have the power to shape our experiences and create a life filled with love, resilience, personal growth, and high performance.
To help you integrate “Threshold Work” into your life, I have provided a few basic steps to get started.
Take some time to sit before crossing a “threshold” and practice deep breathing exercises for a few moments: Focus on your breath as it moves in and out of your body. Feel the air coming in and out of your lungs, and observe any sensations that come up during this process.
Acknowledge the thoughts, feelings, and beliefs that arise when you think about crossing this threshold in your life. Notice how these may be impacting your decisions and how you are viewing yourself right now at this moment. Also, pay close attention to your body. How does your body feel when you acknowledge these beliefs?
Challenge any negative self-talk or limiting beliefs that come to mind during this process: Ask yourself if there is evidence for why these beliefs are true or false. Consider the possibility that other perspectives are available as well, and open up to new possibilities in the way you view yourself and the world around you.
Grant yourself permission to move forward with confidence: Remind yourself of all the successes you’ve had thus far, even if they seem small or insignificant right now;
Take action towards crossing the threshold: Choose one small step each day that will bring you closer to where you want to be; a little goes a long way! Take time to think or dream about future versions of yourself. Play with time and transport yourself through thought to a place that shows you versions of yourself that you want to experience in reality. If you can dream that version of you up, She is already real. Feel proud of every step taken, no matter how big or small it may seem - and eventually, those steps will add up and lead you straight to the Queen you have been dreaming of!
The journey of life is filled with countless opportunities for growth and self-discovery. Have faith in the transformative power of embracing new challenges and crossing “thresholds” with intention. Enter into the spaces around you with light and love.
For it is through this mindset that we find our true potential and impact those around us in positive ways. As you navigate the intricate tapestry of life, remember that you have the choice, the strength, and the determination to become the very best version of yourself. Let gratitude guide your path, and may your journey be filled with endless possibilities.
You got this.
Big Love,
Samantha J.
About the author
Samantha Jones is a powerhouse of strength and creativity, fueling her passion for empowering others through her business and life transformation coaching company called Cre8Wise Movement. As a loving wife and mother, Samantha’s dedication extends beyond her family and her business, as she is also the founder of a charitable organization. Through this organization, Samantha helps underserved women find independence by providing them with job readiness skills. With a heart full of love and a mind focused on transformation, Samantha’s purpose is to facilitate insight and unveil possibilities.
