Genuine Motivation: Young Christian Man Dec 13/Jan 14

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DEC

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2013

What Every Man Wants from his dad

GOT ISSUES? B roken P eople “R” U s This Holiday Season Enter

the no-scold zone A publication of On My Own Now Ministries, Inc.

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GENUINE MOTIVATION Young Christian Man DEC 2013/JAN 2014, Vol. 4 On My Own Now Ministries, Inc., Publisher Rob Beames, Editor Donna Schillinger Page Design Contributors Pete Alwinson, Rob Beames, Will Dole, Sam Harris, Thom Mollohan, Jason Moore, Donna Schillinger Except where noted, content is copyright 2013 On My Own Now Ministries. Articles may be reprinted with credit to author, Genuine Motivation and www.OnMyOwnNow.com. On My Own Now Ministries, Inc. is a nonprofit organization with a 501 (c) (3) determination. Your donations aid in our mission to encourage faith, wise life choices and Christ-likeness in young adults during their transition to living on their own. We welcome submissions of original or repurposed articles that are contributed without expectation of compensation. May God repay you. Visit us at www.OnMyOwnNow.com.

in this issue... Foremost

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What Every Man Wants to Hear (from his dad) by

P e t e A lw i n s o n

Press On

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Steadfast by

Will Dole

Real Relationships Home for the Holidays by

Sam Harris

Can You Relate Weak and Strong by

Thom Mollohan

Cornered

by

The No-Scold Zone by

Grace

Rob Beames

The Recap

The First Christmas (My Version) by

Donna Lee Schillinger

Begin Again

Broken People “R� Us by

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Jason Moore

.8 .10 .12 .14 .16


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Foremost

What Every Man Wants to Hear (from his Dad)

by

Pete Alwinson

W

hat every man wants to hear from his dad and usually doesn’t: “I love you, son, and I’m so proud of you.” It’s amazing how many guys don’t have those words ringing in their ears…how many have never heard those words one time ring in their ears. The most used words by parents and by dads ought to be “I love you, son.” They ought to be so used that a kid hears them and says, “I know, I know, you’ve said it and showed it and I know it. I know, I know, I know.” But many men don’t know. Did your father love you? How do you know if

he didn’t use words? I rack my brain and I can’t ever place those words on my dad’s lips in relation to me. Love wasn’t his strong suit. Work was. Aloneness was. Achievement was. Sports on TV was. All strong suits. Not love. I think my dad loved me…I have some clues: the bag of army men he brought me one night when he got home from a late night meeting… Indian Guides… “Pals Forever”…the car he bought me in high school (that I had to convince him to buy me…but he did!...my first successful sales event), college (he paid for college). Those are the clues. I think he loved me. Pretty sure.

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Foremost I’ll find out when I get Home. Did your father love you? I ask it again. What clues or other evidence do you have? Hey…use words with your kids. Tell them ad nauseam that you love them. Do the right stuff including disciplining them. But use words so that there is no doubt. So then, how can you become a loved son? A real man is a son first and being a son is a man’s core identity. If that’s true, and I think it is, then how does a man who has never experienced being a loved son by an earthly father experience being a loved son by a Heavenly Father? It’s a fact that it will be a challenge because a man who has never had the privilege of feeling loved by his physical father will not have emotional categories to feel loved by his Spiritual Father. What does it feel like to be loved well by an earthly father? I don’t know really and many of you don’t either. But by God’s grace, I have been able to love my sons (and daughter) pretty well…and when I sit back and think about it… I suggest that when a boy is loved well by his earthly father or father role model, he…

man’s heart, making it strong. Feels Forgiven When He Messes Up Boys mess up, but a father who loves well doesn’t expect his little son to have the strength or the knowledge of a mature man. Because the grown lion knows the cub is a cub, when he messes up, he forgives. And the cub knows it and feels forgiven because this big old hairy arm yanks him up and pulls him close and hugs the breath out of the little guy while saying, “Son, I love you! You are a gift! I forgive you and you’ll learn from this! There isn’t a happier dad than me on this planet!” A son who is quickly forgiven is free to risk, and to forgive those who need it from him (like his future wife). Is Free to Be Unique A dad who loves really well knows every child is unique and looks for those temperamental differences that make kids different… and celebrates them. While the father has aspirations for his kids, he’s looking at what the Lord put into his son, not what he wants to cram into him. A dad who loves well believes that God knows best what his son should be like and rejoices even with a son who is totally unlike him.

A son who is quickly forgiven is free to risk, and to forgive those who need it from him (like his future wife). Feels Safe & Secure SURE, the boy knows his dad’s not perfect, but his dad is there most of the time and most of the time he’s really engaged in his son’s life. The dad is this big lion that nuzzles his cub and leads it and carries it around…sometimes the lion king roars at his cubs, but the roars are usually warnings and discipline which doesn’t strike out of anger, but out of deep love, and cubs know it. Predictability is a strong man’s forte. It breeds safety and security in the young

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Develops Character The boy loved well by his dad is told what a man is and what a man is not. The standards come from the Bible, not just from culture, especially not from our present American culture. Character of a Godly sort is developed in this kind of a boy because he sees it in his dad who is an imperfect representative of God. So maybe you haven’t been loved like that by an earthly father. Tons of us guys haven’t. Would have been good to have felt secure, for-


Feature given, unique, filled with character and manly… worthwhile…with an earthly father, right? Now realize this: That even if you had a great dad, your Heavenly Father is far superior and loves way better than what I described above. Put yourself in the place of a boy well loved. Go back a bit and savor it for a minute. And then realize that from eternity past, your Father with a capital F along with the Lion of Judah kept you secure. Because of the Lion, you’re forgiven and you’re released to be the unique man you were intended to be. Once you get the sense of what being wellloved looks like and feels like, then you can begin to see that the Father far exceeds even what you can imagine. No earthly father even approximates the deep perfection of our Heavenly Father. Not only is God not mad at you, he’s wild about you and the Cross proves it! I’m right and you know it. From these humble and simple thoughts, a man can begin to become a loved son. Ultimately, though, being loved is a super-

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natural transaction: “And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, ‘Abba! Father!’ So you are no longer a slave, but a son, and if a son, then an heir through God” (Galatians 4:6-7). “And we have come to know and have believed the love which God has for us. God is love, and the one who abides in love abides in God and God abides in him” (1 John 4:16). When we men abide outside of God’s love, we diminish every day and we have nothing to give our wife and kids or friends or anyone. Abide in his love daily, learn to live loved, and you’ll be so rich you’ll spread the wealth. Men who have been loved, love well and build lives. What you want to hear from your dad, hear from God, and you’ll be more of a man than you ever thought possible. Pete Alwinson is the author of The Father You Need. This selection originally appeared in the KeyLife Connection, Summer 2013, Vol. 28, #2. Visit Keylife.org.

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Press On by

Will Dole

STEADFAST B

lessed is the one who does not walk in step with the wicked or stand in the way that sinners take or sit in the company of mockers, but whose delight is in the law of the Lord, and who meditates on his law day and night. That person is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither— whatever they do prospers.” (Psalm 1:1-3) The metaphors David uses in this psalm are striking. His main point in these verses, and those which follow, is to contrast the way of the righteous with the way of the sinful, along with the vastly different rewards each will earn from God. Yet we also learn what a righteous man is like in this passage. He is like a tree planted by streams of water yielding its fruit in season and always keeping its leaves fresh. How often do we strive to attain this? How often do we desire to be righteous? When is God’s kingdom a priority for us? Most of us probably do these things some of the time, but how hard do we actually pursue these things? What’s the measure of our progress? Many of our common pastimes have nothing to do with godliness, such as viewing blogs, retweets and Facebook Likes. We’re usually more concerned about our perception by the world than our impact upon it. Do people like us? Do they respect us? Will others listen when we have something really important to say? This is where most of us live. We may agree that a righteous man should be like a tree planted by streams of living water,

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but rarely do we live our lives in a manner consistent with this truth. We live in an increasingly transient culture. Gone are the days when a person is born, lives and dies in the same town, the same church or even the same culture. Few people work one job their whole lives, love one wife faithfully or stand by an imperfect church resolutely. These used to be the norm; but they are now only a quaint relic of days gone by. We live in an increasingly globalized society and we are nearly all wrapped up in the alternate reality we call the internet—hardly conducive to pursuing a righteous life. It’s been said that we live in a microwave world, meaning that we are living in a time when instant gratification isn’t only something we expect, it’s something we demand. A tree makes a stark contrast to the demand for an immediately satisfying lifestyle. A tree begins as a very small seed. Once that seed is planted, it takes several years before a tree begins to bear fruit. It grows slowly, but surely. In time, if the tree is not uprooted or overcome by disease, it will become a consistent, faithful, fruit producer. There is nothing instant or microwave like about a tree at all. It is always there. It bears fruit in season. It is steadfast. If we are serious about living in righteousness as we are called to do or to be shining lights on a hill as Jesus described, we must learn what it means to be steadfast. Here are a few simple ways to become more steadfast, although none of them are easy to


put into practice. First of all, we can attempt to be more steadfast in our walk with God. This means consistently reading the word of God and praying through what you read. Consistency is important. This doesn’t necessarily involve huge chunks of time, but consistent ones. Focusing on our walk with God, could mean that we finally make a commitment to a local church and stop church hopping. Once we find a place teaches the basics of the gospel, we should stick it out as much as possible. No church is perfect, but every Christian church is part of Christ’s body and is the visible expression of His bride. We need to love her. We can also be more steadfast in how we interact with our community. A church hopping mentality with our career can detract from the impact we were meant to have in our community. When we jump from job to job looking for something to fulfill us every time the grass looks greener, we hardly get a chance to make a lasting contribution. Rather, if we find a job matching our gifts, we should stick with it. Remember, we work for the Lord, not for men. We should desire to become excellent at what we do. Outside of work and church, we can look for ways to serve the community God created for us to reside in and enjoy. Going home to watch porn, play Skyrim, or be obsessed by Facebook or ESPN is time we could spend looking for ways to serve others. It’s way off the track God has to conform us to the image of Christ. We need to be involved in something outside ourselves! Volunteering at a soup kitchen, food pantry, teen center, or school, etc., can

help refocus our efforts on what we were designed to do: good works (Ephesians 2:10). We should follow through with any charities. If we go once in a while only to feel good about ourselves, it won’t stick. We should find a cause that moves us and pour ourselves into it. Finally, we can also be more steadfast toward our families. Whether we are husbands, fathers, brothers, or sons, we can strive to be a reliable presence for our families. We all have different talents, resources, abilities and family situations, but our families should be able to rely on us. We don’t want to flake out on them when they need us the most. Do we use what God has given us to honor our parents, support our siblings, love our wives and disciple our children? We should all keep pressing toward these goals. Paul encourages us in Philippians 2:1213, “Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed—not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence—continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose.” Obviously, there are many other things we can do to pursue steadfastness in our lives. As Kevin DeYoung said, “Just be faithful. Sometimes all you can do is all that you can do.” But, we should first desire righteousness and want to be more steadfast, which seems to fly in the face of everything we hear today. We can take heart knowing that it is God’s desire for us to stand firm and He is determined to make us more righteous by His Spirit.

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Real Relationships

Home for the Holidays “

by

I

t’s the time of year that most of us have come to associate with food, friends, family and fellowship. Perhaps we all share similar experiences of sitting around the dinner table, passing the potatoes to distant relatives we only see once in a while, saying why we’re thankful, reading the Christmas story or chatting pleasantly about the latest events in our lives. That’s a nice scenario, right? Not for everyone. Many are hampered with contrastingly unpleasant memories of the holidays. Some of us may remember having to be nice to certain relatives who were difficult to like, or trying to avoid awkward conversations or family dinners filled with fretting and fighting, rather than feasting and festivities (threw in a few more words beginning with “f ” just to be Dr. Seussical). Why do we so often seem to take the time we have with our families for granted? My personal story may provide some insight. Being single and relatively close to my immediate family, I haven’t experienced the stereotypical dread of making uneasy

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Sam Harris

plans with the in-laws, but I still know what it’s like to have ambiguous feelings about family time. It was only recently, that I was able to move out of my parents’ house and get a place of my own with the help of a couple of roommates while beginning work on a post-graduate degree. So, for a long time, I had to accept living under my parents’ roof, like it or not. For a while, I had the comforts of home along with the love, care and wisdom of my parents. I’m thankful that they raised me in the ways of the Lord and helped me to mature into the man I am today. But, I’ve also known the frustrations of wanting to escape from the well-intentioned doting of a nurturing mother. I’ve known the discomfort of trying to figure out how best to deal with a rebellious, troubled and distant teenage brother. I’ve sometimes felt trapped in my own home and been compelled to withdraw from my family in my journey to become an independent adult. A Christian family in a Christian home does not automatically render a perfect family in a perfect home. Despite all its good points, my family is


naturally flawed, as are all families. So, I guess I get it. Family time isn’t pleasant for everyone and some people have perfectly legitimate reasons for dreading family gatherings rather than anticipating them. Outside of my own experiences, I’ve heard stories from others which render my personal frustrations paltry in comparison. Some brothers and uncles refuse to attend family reunions or even talk to other family members. There are sisters out there who have left their husbands and children behind for other men. When we know or live with someone long enough, we’re bound to rub each other the wrong way at some point. While all of this is true, we can’t forget the fact that families are important and need to be cherished, along with all their flaws. Early in Genesis, we learn that a man is intended to leave his family and join himself to a wife (Genesis 2:24). Eventually, it’s perfectly okay—for most, even preferable—for one to desire independence from family. But the Bible also makes clear that we are to honor our parents and are to live in fellowship with our families, as with everyone. As Paul says, “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone” (Romans 12:18). The problems that many of us have had in our family relationships can be very difficult, yet God’s unconditional love for us all can be a great source of strength helping us to treat others as we should in every circumstance. Since moving out, I’ve tried to make sure that I haven’t completely abandoned my family. In fact, since I go to school in a small town only about five minutes from where my parents and youngest brother still live, it’s not at all uncommon for me to see my family at church on Sunday mornings. Sometimes, I even stop by for a meal on someone’s birthday or whenever my mom reminds me to pick up my warm clothes for the winter. I have peers who have told me

that the relationships with their parents improved drastically after they moved out. Even though I’ve only been out on my own for a little while and had a decent relationship with my parents before that, I’m starting to see similar signs in my own life. It’s worthwhile to maintain fellowship with one’s family, even if we don’t live close enough for that fellowship to happen frequently in person. There’s certainly no shame in taking advantage of a nice, homecooked meal every once in a while instead of having ramen or frozen pizza at the bachelor pad. The holidays are coming soon. I, for one, will be blessed with a long and needed break from school. I’ll be glad to have some alone time to catch up on things that I’ve been wanting to do, but I certainly don’t intend to spend all of my holiday break cooped up alone in my townhouse. No, I’ll be spending as much time as possible over the Christmas holiday with my father and mother, my two younger brothers and possibly other family and friends, who are able to visit us. It’s going to be a good time. We should all take advantage of the family God has given us whenever possible and enjoy them as the blessings they were meant to be. If that is difficult for us to do sometimes, a good place for us to start might be to focus on being the blessing God has called us to be for our families. Sam Harris is continuously striving to follow Jesus Christ more closely and to love others more fully. He is currently pursuing an M.A. in English at Liberty University in Lynchburg, Virginia, where he also works as a teaching assistant for English classes. He enjoys writing nonfiction accounts of his life experiences, as well as science-fiction and fantasy stories and the occasional poem. He would like to be a teacher, a writer, or a superhero when he grows up. You can find his blog at www.sirrahleumas. wordpress.com, or like “Samuel N. Harris” on Facebook.

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Can You Relate by

O

Weak and Strong

Thom Mollohan

kay. Time for confession. Ready? Well, here it is. I’m not as strong as I sometimes wish I was. I’m not as brave as I would like to be and I’m not as smart as I’d like to pretend. I don’t like to be wrong, to look foolish, and I don’t like it when I say something half-baked. I certainly do not ever want to appear less than super spiritual. I always need to know exactly how God works and what specific response He expects in any given situation.

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None of these things will surprise anyone who knows me well, but I generally have a hard time admitting I have such deficiencies. I seem to operate with the notion that if I never acknowledge these things, they’ll magically cease to exist along with any power they may have had over me. But God has a way of helping us to see ourselves as we really are. He is always in the business of plunging into the deep places of our hearts as He increases His blessings toward us.


Recently, during a morning prayer time, God conducted spiritual surgery on my heart giving me new insights regarding His work in my life. Generally speaking, I consider myself an intensely private person, carefully guarding certain aspects of my life. Some of that guardedness is good and so remains. For instance, my wife and children are a sacred charge to me whom I prayerfully protect to the best of my ability. I try to create a nurturing environment around them by establishing fair boundaries within which God’s Spirit can do His work of forming them into the men and woman He has created them to be. But there are certain areas of my life that I simply do not talk about, in the name of discretion. These I shelter for much less noble reasons. As the Lord reveals some of these areas to me, I’ve discovered I’m not always trying to avoid feeding a complaining spirit, but often I’m attempting to display a strong and invulnerable demeanor to the world around me. After all, we should never let our problems get us down, right? We are supposed to hold our heads high and never let on that we are sometimes overcome by betrayals, failures and disappointments. In a moment of grace, the Lord opened my eyes to the fact that refusing to acknowledge how we’ve been hurt stems from the sin of pride, which is the chief obstacle to the thorough healing God desires to bring about in each one of His children. Not only that, but it robs God of His glory by failing to allow the demonstration of His grace in our lives to an ever-watching world. It also robs others of the power such grace can inspire after observing the responses of those willing to trust Him for their sense of value and identity. This realization was brought home to me by a passage in 2 Corinthians 12:9-10, “But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in

difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” Am I saying that God wants us to air our dirty laundry everywhere? No, but it is vital to recognize, admit and surrender the broken pieces of our hearts and the miserable failures we’ve brought upon ourselves so that we, loaded with all our finiteness and wretchedness, can appreciate God’s infinite grace! What God has taught me – and teaches me still – is that while His methods can seem harsh, uncaring and incomprehensible, His love for me is eternal, profound and inexhaustible. The distortion of my spiritual vision is not reality; it is merely a misrepresentation that Satan likes to exploit for his slick smear campaign against God. In the midst of pain I have believed in God. I have even believed that God was good, but I didn’t always see what that goodness meant for me or even that His goodness was directed toward me. My hope and prayer is that we better understand that no matter how much we’ve been hurt in life, there is an eternal God Who truly does love us and, through Jesus Christ, really does accept us. Since this truth never changes for us regardless of our circumstances, we can be honest about our pain with ourselves and we can live transparent lives, so that although we are weak, others may see the strength we possess in Christ. Paul explains how, “May our Lord Jesus Christ himself and God our Father, who loved us and by his grace gave us eternal encouragement and good hope, encourage your hearts and strengthen you in every good deed and word” (2 Thessalonians 2:16-17).

Thom Mollohan and his family have ministered in southern Ohio for the past 18 and a half years. He is the author of The Fairy Tale Parables: Classis Fairy Tales Pointing to God’s Love and Truth, Crimson Harvest and A Heart at Home with God. He blogs at unfurledsails.wordpress.com. Pastor Thom leads Pathway Community Church and may be reached for comments or questions by email at pastorthom@pathwaygallipolis.com. 11 GM


Cornered

by

Grace

Welcome to the

No-Scold Zone

by

Rob Beames

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ith our armed services having conducted operations in Iraq and Bosnia not long ago, many of us may be familiar with no-fly zones established to prohibit the aircraft of a belligerent nation from passing through the region. Any planes breaking the no-fly zone could be shot down. During some of my family recreational maneuvers, we found it necessary to employ similar tactical methods, so we declare certain times No-Scold Zones (NSZ). These established durations prohibit overprotective assaults from flying though the airways targeting the buildup of potentially fun activities. At times such force becomes necessary to keep the kill-joy comments at bay. Anyone caught breaking these no-scold zones may be gently shot down according to the terms of the NSZ agreement. My family isn’t the only place that could benefit from NSZ. We are often too quick to reproach children, students, young people, family, strangers, or even ourselves for what we may consider inappropriate behavior. It can severely damage the joy of our freedom in Christ. Paul explains we should guard against attacks upon our freedom, “It

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is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery” (Galatians 5:1-3). We can easily become obsessed with changing our own behavior, or that of others, to the point that we criticize, nag, rebuke with authority. It can quickly become overkill. A few verses later, Paul qualifies his statement, “You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh; rather, serve one another humbly in love” (Galatians 5:13). So, we aren’t free to be selfish. However, the only thing which should continue to enslave us is our love and consideration for others. Paul reminds us, “Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for whoever loves others has fulfilled the law” (Romans 13:8). The pressure to keep the law often leads to unbalanced attitudes. We begin to focus on preserving the purity of the church and protecting our witness to society. If our crusade produces massive carnage of lifeless souls sucked dry of joy, then so be it. After all, we shout: God will not be


mocked! That’s true. He won’t, but we should lighten up. He doesn’t need our help as much as we might think. We don’t have to relax our standards to relax in the freedom Christ has given us, but sometimes we need a break from protecting God’s law and His reputation. Christ came and died to free us from this obligation. So why are we so often worried about our righteousness, which is more like not-evencloseness? We forget that through Christ we have the very presence of God. During their pilgrimage to the promise land, God warned Moses, “Go up to the land flowing with milk and honey. But I will not go with you, because you are a stiff-necked people and I might destroy you on the way” (Exodus 33:3). If God remained among His people alongside all of their sinfulness and faithlessness, He would end up consuming them by His holiness. Even God’s own people were just too disgusting for His presence. That doesn’t bode well for us today. Although we are God’s chosen nation by our faith in Christ, we are no more His people than Israel was. We aren’t any less repulsive either. In our pride, we think all of our technology, civility, eloquent sermons, beautiful churches, Christian schools, seminaries, well-worded devotions, democracy, charities, etc., make us more acceptable to God. They don’t. They only build up our pride and help us to put more confidence in ourselves. We become tricked into thinking we don’t need to trust in Christ’s death alone for our salvation, sanctification and approval. Fear not. There is hope. It’s called Christmas! No amount of pleading from Moses would convince God to remain among His people during their exodus from Egypt, but a few thousand years later that would all change. At just the right time, God was pleased to send His only Son to His people. One of the conditions of this amazing gift was that this boy was to have the name Emanuel, which means “God with us.” Instead of filling that silent night with all the contemptible reasons God should destroy us by His presence, God chose to come and dwell among us in a way He had never done before. His

presence, in the person of His Son, meant peace to us, not annihilation. As a result of the comprehensive forgiveness Jesus secured on the cross, God came to His people and remained. God’s absolute refusal to Moses all those years ago changed to an unconditional “Yes!” in a barn filled with smelly animals in the insignificant town of Bethlehem. Jesus remained with us for a while, accomplished all He came to do, and when it was finished, God remained with us in the form of the Holy Spirit. From that night on, God’s people were no longer contemptible, but would house the very Spirit of God. That is really good news! No wonder all the angels were singing. They knew the hopeless losers, the human race, just had the rules changed in their favor. Yes, we are still going to be inappropriate at times. We’re going to offend others. We’re going to act immaturely. We still aren’t very lovable in our sin, but what has changed is how God looks at all of our depravity. He considers us as He considers Jesus. He only knows the perfection of Christ. Our imperfection no longer matters. Do we continue to teach our children not to offend others and not to be vulgar? Sure. Do we encourage one another to be as righteous as we know how, to stand out as a light to a dark world, to set the standard of our society high and to love others well? Yes, but sometimes, we need to relax and enjoy the unconditional peace we have with God. Christmas is an awesome time for that! Usually it’s on our family outings that no-scold zones are enforced, although Christmas is a good time for that, too. It’s a good time to remember that although His unapproachable holiness kept Him from being among His people, His love found a way to make it happen. Christmas is all about God’s love which would not be denied. So maybe we don’t have to be quite as concerned about keeping others in line or worrying about our witness—at least for one day. We have God’s presence! There’s plenty of time to worry about our righteousness—or the lack of it—next year. If any day should be a no-scold zone, Christmas Day should! (I believe He wanted me to remind you of this.)

Why are we so worried about our righteousness, which is more like not-even-closeness?

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Desert The Recap Journals Paraphrased

by

Donna Lee Schillinger

T he F irst C hristmas (My Version) Surely by now, you’ve heard of YouVersion, the Bible app with over 600 versions. Well, it’s missing one important one, and that’s my version! At the beginning of this year, I started, as a devotional practice, trying to rephrase the NIV Bible in words and phrasing I would use in regular conversation. After completing the book of John, I had garnered so much understanding and perspective compared to the times I had just read the Bible that I decided to move forward with a chronological NIV of the four gospels and Acts. You can read my progress on my personal blog. Here’s my version of the Christmas story. I have cited the corresponding NIV scriptures throughout the text. Now let me throw down a challenge for you to pick a small New Testament book and try to put it in your own words verse by verse in the coming year, so that you too can have a version! Please don’t misunderstand the challenge. This isn’t an exercise in post-modern relativity where you can decide what you think the Bible should say. The point is to take what the Bible does say, ingest it, digest it and then reiterate it in the way you speak in conversation, without changing the meaning. You’ll be surprised at how much more personal God’s word becomes to you. The First Christmas (how I would say it)

There was a teenage girl named Mary who was engaged to marry a young man named Joseph Davidson. Joseph came from a good family. He had in his lineage, among other notables, King David of Judah. Not long before the wedding was set to take place, it became obvious that Mary was pregnant (and not with Joseph’s child). Joseph was an upright kind of guy and

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didn’t want to make a huge scene, so he thought he would just end the engagement quietly. He was all but decided on this course of action when he had a dream in which an other-worldly being appeared to him and said, “Joseph Davidson, don’t be afraid to marry Mary. The child she’s carrying belongs to God’s Holy Spirit. It’s going to be a boy and you will name him Jesus. And he’s going to rescue those who belong to him from the punishment their human condition deserves.” When Joseph woke up, he went along with the dream and married Mary. However, he was careful not to have sex with her until after she gave birth. Matt. 1:18-21; 24-25 Around this same time, the Roman Emperor Caesar Augustus, who controlled the nation of Israel, issued a mandate for a census of the entire Roman Empire. (This was the first census that took place while Quirinius was the governor of Syria, FYI.) So everyone had to go to their ancestral home to register. This meant that Joseph had to leave his present home in Nazareth, Galilee, and go back to Bethlehem, Judea, which is where all the Davidsons were from. He took Mary along, baby bump and all. Bethlehem was packed with people and there was absolutely no lodging, so they had to stay in a barn. While they were in Bethlehem, Mary went into labor and gave birth to a son, her first child. Lacking the proper supplies for a newborn, they just wrapped him in whatever cloth they could find and used the animals’ feed trough as a cradle. Some shepherds lived out in the fields near the barn. On the night Jesus was born, they were tending their sheep outside when, all of


the sudden, they saw something amazing surrounding them—not of this world—and then a being appeared to them. It was terrifying. The being said, “Don’t be afraid. I’ve got great news that’s going to make everyone happy. Today, right over there in Bethlehem, the Rescuer has been born. He’s the one God has appointed to rule. You’ll know you’ve found him when you see a baby wrapped in rags and cradled in a feed trough.” All of a sudden, there was a whole military company of these beings in the sky and they were saying, “All the credit goes to God who lives in the highest places outside of time and space. Peace to the people of Earth who God favors.” Then they were gone. When the shepherds could speak again, they said, “We ought to go to Bethlehem and find this baby that… that… thing told us about.” They rushed off and were able to find Mary, Joseph and the baby, cradled in a feed trough. After seeing this, they told everyone they could what had happened and who this child was. Everyone who heard their story was amazed. Mary took careful note of everything that was happening and she contemplated it—not with her head, but with her heart. The shepherds eventually went back to tending sheep, but for a long time after, they marveled and were in awe at how God announced the child’s birth to them and how they found the child exactly as the being had described. Luke 2:1-20 This all went down just the way God said it would hundreds of years earlier through the words of a prophet: “A virgin will conceive and give birth to a son who will be known as God with us on Earth.” Matt. 1:22-23 After Jesus was born in Bethlehem in Judea, during the time of King Herod, some philosopher/astrologer dignitary types from somewhere farther east (possibly modern day Iran, Iraq, India or China) arrived in Jerusalem wanting to know, “Where is the newborn king of the Jews? We’ve been studying the stars and

saw the cosmic sign that he was born. We want to pay homage to him.” This was news to King Herod, and not the good kind. In fact, it had all of Jerusalem in a clamor. He called together all the top dogs of the church and the law and asked where this appointed child was supposed to be born, according to the ancient texts. “In Bethlehem, Judea,” they replied. “An ancient prophet wrote, ‘Don’t belittle yourself, Bethlehem. Stand tall among the rest of Judea because you are going to be the hometown of a ruler who will guide my people, Israel.’” Behind closed doors, Herod met with the visiting dignitaries and ascertained the exact time the star they mentioned had appeared. He sent them on to Bethlehem with instructions to, “Search out the child, and as soon as you find him, send news to me so I can come and pay homage too.” With this, they left, and they were able to follow the celestial body right to the place where Jesus was residing. It just hung over the place. They could hardly believe their eyes and were just plain giddy. Collecting themselves, they entered the house and saw Jesus with his mother, Mary, and they got down on hands and knees and pledged their confidence and service. Then they brought the first Christmas presents: gold, frankincense and myrrh—all really expensive stuff in those days. Wise men that they were, after a dream warned them against Herod, they decided not to go back the same way they had come, avoiding contact with Herod entirely. Matt. 2:1-12 As for baby Jesus, well, he grew up and became a strong and wise young man. God had exceptionally gifted him. Luke 2:40. In 2008 Donna Lee Schillinger founded On My Own Now Ministries to encourage faith, wise life choices and Christ-likeness in young adults. On My Own Now publishes the free, monthly online magazines, Single! Young Christian Woman and Genuine Motivation: Young Christian Man.

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Begin Again

Broken PeopleR US by

Jason Moore

T

im Keller is a pastor in Manhattan, New York, who has the ability to say things in thought-provoking ways. In a recent sermon, he made the statement that God is attracted to the unwanted, the unloved, the weak and the broken. However this overlooked or downtrodden group of people is described, Keller’s claim remains the same. Is it true? Is God really attracted to broken people? Keller tells us that one of the proofs backing this up is the way God interacts in the life of Jacob as recorded in the Old Testament. Jacob was the younger of twins. Even though he was born second after his brother Esau, actually hanging on to his brother’s foot, he was still considered the younger of the two, and therefore, less privileged. In ancient culture, the firstborn son was given a double portion of his parents’ estate. The oldest was often favored just because of his birth order.

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©2013 Cracked Lense Photography

But that wasn’t the only thing working against Jacob. Esau was his father’s favorite, not only because he was the eldest, but also because his dad was easily drawn to him. Esau was a skilled hunter—a real manly man. He consistently made his father proud by his brawny achievements. In contrast, Jacob was more of a businessman. While this didn’t necessarily make him unmanly, he certainly was not as rugged as his brother. In fact, he favored his mother. Maybe this was, in part, because his mother favored him over his brother. In any case, he felt the cruel sting of being unwanted and undervalued by his dad. That kind of rejection is difficult for anyone to overcome. The resulting feelings of shame caused Jacob to become a man aching for approval, acceptance and affection lacking from his father. In time, Jacob did find what he so badly


needed. Rather, it found him. During one desperate night, God came to Jacob and his life was changed for good. The seeds of deception which Jacob had been sowing in the lives of his father, brother and uncle were fully grown and ready to harvest. Having found his brother in a moment of weakness, Jacob seized the opportunity and scammed Esau out of his birth right. He also lied to his father to gain the blessing meant for his brother, and after years of a mutually dishonest relationship with his uncle, he was literally forced to run for his life. As he ran with his entire family and all his earthly possessions, he must have felt completely isolated from the world. Exhausted, he found himself alone that night in the middle of nowhere. He grabbed a rock for a pillow and fell asleep. Suddenly, he had a vision that heaven opened up and God was standing over him while angels ascended and descended from heaven. God promised to be with Jacob and to bless him like He had his father and his father’s father before him (Genesis 28:10-15). Is God attracted to broken people? Looking at the way God dealt with Jacob, it would seem so. In the Bible, God doesn’t seek out the best and the brightest. He is not in search of superstars. Jesus Christ wasn’t even a superstar while on earth. He was a humble craftsman having no status or reputation. God doesn’t respect others the way we often do. Instead, “He mocks proud mockers but shows favor to the humble and oppressed” (Proverbs 3:34). God’s consistent that way. He’s drawn to the broken. He causes the broken to become whole and the weak to become strong. He loves the unlovely. He favors the unwanted. The apostle Paul once explained to a church in Corinth that, “God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the

weak things of the world to shame the strong. God chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him” (1 Corinthians 1:2729). If God is truly attracted to the broken, that is good news for us! None of us are too broken for God to love. God deeply loves the broken. He does not reject us or run from us because of our imperfections. In fact, He runs toward us. He embraces us. It is through messed up things that God’s glory shines the brightest. God is attracted to the unloved, the unwanted, the weak and the desperately broken. We need not hide from Him or allow our shame to keep us in the dark. God has given His approval, acceptance and affection to severely broken people. If we turn to Him in our brokenness, we will experience His love and peace in our lives. Jason Moore is a church-planting pastor with the Presbyterian Church in America. More than that, he is a child of God saved by His amazing grace. It is his hope that, come what may, God will use his life to display the love of God and make His goodness known.

Is God attracted to broken people?

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