Genuine Motivation: Young Christian Man December 2011

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DEC

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2011

A Charlie Brown Kind of Christmas

Do the Math

NO Wrongs Don’t Make a Right Not-so-obvious Christmas Gift Guide

Who Are You? Seriously. A publication of On My Own Now Ministries, Inc.

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in this

issue...

Foremost

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If You Need Therapy... by

Steve Brown

Press On

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Amazing Grace by

Will Dole

Can You Relate

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Who Are You? by

Thomas Mollohan

Tool Box

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The Not-So-Obvious Christmas Gift Guide by

Jeffrey Bridgman

On

the

Couch

Do the Math: No Wrongs Don’t Make a Right by

Randy Kosloski

Holiday Special A Charlie Brown Kind of Christmas by

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Thomas Mollohan

Cornered

Sheep Food by

Rob Beames

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by

Grace

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Walking Man: A Modern Missions Experience in Latin America By Narciso Zamora Winner of the 2008 Next Generation Indie Book Award, this odyssey of a Peruvian delinquent’s winding and treacherous path toward finding his calling in missions recounts a literal journey of 10,000 miles. 978-0-9791639-0-6 Softcover 208 pp. On sale $11 at OnMyOwnNow.com Abridged audiobook in MP3 format and CD .Kindle edition available. Also in Spanish: Caminante con Dios…en apuro mas no desesperados: El Trabajo Misionero en América Latina Por Narciso Zamora 978-0-9791639-1-3 Softcover 186 pp. On sale $1 1 at OnMyOwnNow.com

White Collar Skid Row by Melissa Ann Bell Melissa thought her faith was strong, but when she fell in love with and married a charming doctor, in rehab for alcoholism, she quickly became his enabler and their relationship challenged all she believed about herself and her faith. White Collar Skid Row is a wake-up call for any woman who thinks she might be impervious to falling for the wrong man. Paperback 302pp. On sale $11

On My Own Now: Straight Talk from the Proverbs for Young Christian Women who Want to Remain Pure, Debt-free and Regret-free By Donna Lee Schillinger This compact collection of quirky vignettes, based on gender-reversed Proverbs, is great for daily devotions, affirmations, confessions, benedictions and many other religious “tions,” all with the goal of keeping you on the yellow brick road. After all, you’re not in Kansas anymore – you’re on your own now. 978-0-9791639-5-1 Softcover, 288 pp. © 2008 On sale $11 at OnMyOwnNow.com; Abridged Audiobook (MP3 download) On sale $11; Kindle edition available. Also in Spanish: Por Mi Cuenta Ahora: Una Conversación Directa de los Proverbios para Mujeres Jóvenes Cristianas que Quieren Permanecer Puras, Libres de Deudas y Arrepentimientos Por Donna Lee Schillinger. Free e-book at www.VivaLaPureza.info Purity’s Big Payoff/Premarital Sex is a Big Rip-off is a collection of 17 first-person narratives about successfully waiting for marriage to have sex – or not – and the consequences of those decisions. 978-0-9791639-8-2, Softcover, 116 pp. On sale $11 at OnMyOwnNow.com Also in Spanish! La Gran Recompensa de la Pureza/La Gran Estafa del Sexo Prematrimonial. Free e-book at www.VivaLaPureza.info

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Foremost oremost F

IF YOU NEED THERAPY… by

Steve Brown

I

’m a scrooge at Christmas, everything is abnormal and out of control. Then there is also the guilt I feel. My late friend, Rusty Anderson, used to say that he liked everything that went along with Christmas, but Jesus. Rusty said that he liked the parties, the food, the presents and the family…but Jesus messed it all up. As he enjoyed all that went along with the celebration of Christmas, he would think, I’m not being very religious. It isn’t my birthday…It’s Jesus’ birthday. As Rusty suggested, maybe we should celebrate Jesus’ birth in July and enjoy the holidays in December. If you’re a scrooge, the religious stuff messes with your head at Christmas. Now don’t get me wrong: my favorite service all year long is Christmas Eve. By then, if you haven’t bought the right present for the right person, it’s too

late. Then you can only think about Jesus. Another reason Christmas is difficult for me – and this was especially true when I was still a pastor – is because so many people are in pain at Christmas. Those who have lost loved ones feel the sadness of loss more at Christmas; those who are depressed are only more depressed at Christmas; and those who have been abused, abandoned or shamed feel that more at Christmas than any other time of the year. One other reason. Nothing can live up to the hype of Christmas…without Jesus. Think about it. Christmas without Jesus is a holiday to celebrate nothing. Holiday trees, secular music and solstice winter celebrations are all fine, but they become a celebration of nothing. Absolutely nothing. While I’m not a serial killer about taking Christ out of Christmas, it is sad and sets up people for a

"Think about it. Christmas without Jesus is a holiday to celebrate nothing."

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Feature horrible letdown. Without Christ, nothing can live up to the hype of Christmas. I can see a mother putting away the Christmas decorations and thinking, You know, there was something there. Then she shrugs her shoulders and mops the floor, or goes to work at the office, or gets drunk…and that’s it. That is so sad. If you’re not a Christian, don’t let that happen to you this year. With all of that being said, though, as an old guy, I’m starting to look forward to Christmas. I like all the stuff that goes along with it, but I like Jesus

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things. You are connected to a God who is real and who is supernatural. Do you pray that way? Do you live that way? Truth be told, we really don’t believe that. And what does Jesus do as Supernatural Counselor? A COUNSELOR SPEAKS TRUTH Jesus speaks supernatural truth (Psalm 119:24). Real supernatural power has spoken truth to us. When the first Christmas took place, God entered

"When the first Christmas took place, God entered time and space because He was fond of us. At that very moment, we found out that God wasn't angry at His own." better. Let me let you in on a secret. As I’ve walked with Him most of my life, I’ve found out that He likes the parties and the food too. (And that makes me feel less guilty!) Who is this Jesus – really? A man who lived hundreds of years before Jesus was ever born has some answers. In Isaiah 9:6-7, Isaiah the prophet looked into the future and prophesied about something – Someone – had never seen, something – Someone – we look back to. Even Jesus Christ, Wonderful Counselor. “For to us a child is born, to us a son is given; and the government shall be upon his shoulder, and his name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.” Jesus the Messiah will be called Wonderful Counselor. While in the Hebrew this has overtones of our word “wonderful,” it literally means “supernatural”…so Supernatural Counselor. We need to be reminded of the supernatural. You are connected to an incredibly supernatural power that parts seas, moves mountains and changes

time and space because He was fond of us. At that very moment, we found out that God wasn’t angry at His own. We are forgiven, loved and accepted. But it was more than that. It was a time when light entered the darkness…when truth stood up to the lies. After the Civil War, when the Union troops captured Richmond, wagonloads of Confederate money were taken from the city. In the evenings during that trip, the Union troops would play poker with Confederate money. It wasn’t an important game. In fact, it was a meaningless game. The money was absolutely worthless. In His coming, Jesus gave us truth: “Follow me, and I will make you fishers of men” (Matthew 4:19). “I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live…Everyone… who believes in me shall never die…” (John 11:2526). “Neither do I condemn you…” (John 8:11). “… and no one will snatch them out of my hand” (John 10:28). You belong to him. That is true…absolute truth. He speaks supernatural truth to us and that en-

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ables us to speak truth in turn. We let them know that the poker game isn’t real. And, when it’s over, nobody wins in that game. Because of the coming of the Messiah, you know what’s important. You know truth that nobody but you can know because of him. A COUNSELOR SHARES FAVOR Jesus shares supernatural favor (Isaiah 1:26). Do you remember the Garth Brooks lyric “I got friends in low places”? There was a time when I had a brother in high places. My late brother Ron was the District Attorney of the 28th Congressional District in North Carolina. (He was a Democrat and the only good thing about his death is that he now knows the truth!) We grew up on “the other side of the tracks.” When my brother was the D.A., I had connective power. In Asheville where he served, the police knew my name. Even the ones who once yelled at me started calling me with respect “Mr. Brown.” I didn’t try, but maybe I could have even gotten parking tickets fixed! You have a friend in a high place – a very high place – too. The Bible teaches that Jesus “is seated at the right hand of the throne of God” (Hebrews 12:2). Your Supernatural Counselor sits at the right hand of God. You don’t ever have to cower before God, worry about your life or think that anything is hopeless because you have a friend…a friend in a very high place. A COUNSELOR SECURES JUSTICE Jesus secures supernatural justice (1 John 2:1). My out-of-town lawyer friend once told me, “I like for you to get into trouble because it’s the only time I see you.” And he does just that – gets me out of trouble. We have a counselor, a lawyer, who pleads our case before the throne. If you’re not a believer, some day you are going to stand before a holy God, and frankly, you’re going to be stuck representing yourself. And, as they say, anyone who represents himself has a fool for a lawyer.

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If, as a Christian, you’ve had a personal Christmas, you have a lawyer to plead your case before the bar of ultimate justice. Peter Marshall said that one day he will stand before God and be condemned. At that moment, Jesus will come and put His hand on Peter’s shoulder and say, “It’s okay, Father. I took care of all of that on the cross.” A COUNSELOR SUPPLIES COMFORT Jesus supplies supernatural comfort (John 14:16, 18). There was a convention of psychiatrists at a Disney resort. In the large auditorium of the resort, there was a trapped pigeon flying all around. Believe it or not, it took three full days before anybody admitted that they saw the pigeon. It generally takes about that long in the darkness before we look up and remember that it is okay because Jesus – the dove, the Holy Spirit, the Messiah – is there. Do you remember when Jesus walked on the water (Matthew 14)? It was a scary time. The wind was against them and the waves were beating against the boat. Then one of the disciples saw Jesus. They all looked and thought it was a ghost. That’s when

"If You're not a believer, some day you are going to stand before a Holy God, and frankly, you're going to be stuck representing yourself. And, as they say, anyone who represents himself has a fool for a lawyer."


Feature Jesus said, “Take heart; it is I. Do not be afraid” (v. 27). “It’s me. Don’t be afraid.” I don’t know what you’re going through, but be still and listen for His voice. Jesus tells you the same thing, “It’s me. Don’t be afraid.” Isaiah said hundreds of years before it happened that the coming Messiah would be an amazing supernatural source of comfort and encouragement. I’ve been walking this walk a long time and have a lot of lines in my face to prove it. A lot of those lines are laugh lines, but there are worry and fear lines too. I’ve walked in some dark places, some painful places and through some things that I would rather not have gone (some that I’m embarrassed that I did). But you know something? I’ve never walked through any of those places alone. If I could get still enough, Jesus would say, “It’s me. Don’t be afraid.” Then there will be “the valley of the shadow of death” (Psalm 23:4). And He will be there too. It’s an old illustration: In Scotland, an old man was dying. He called for his pastor and, during their conversation, the dying man admitted to having trouble praying. The pastor told him, “It’s not as hard as you think. You’re making it too religious. Just picture Jesus sitting in the chair where I’m sitting right now and talk to Him the way you talk to me.” There was some more chit-chat and then the pastor left to go home. The next day, the man’s daughter called the pastor and said through her tears, “Father died last night. I had just brought him his supper and had come back to retrieve the dishes. And he was gone.” She paused and then said, “And, pastor, the strangest thing. His hand was on the chair beside his bed.” If you need therapy, invite Jesus to be your Counselor this Christmas.

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Reprinted with permission. Scripture quotations are from the English Standard Version of the Bible. Steve Brown is the founder of Key Life Network, a radio broadcaster, seminary professor, and author. He previously served as a pastor for 25 years and now serves as Professor Emeritus of Preaching at Reformed Theological Seminary, teaching at the campuses in Atlanta, Orlando and Washington, D.C. He is the author of numerous books, including A Scandalous Freedom and What Was I Thinking? His is new book, Three Free Sins, will be released in February of 2012.

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Press On by

Will Dole

amazing grace H

ey, did you know we have something in common? If you’re reading this, (and even if you’re not), you’re a sinner—and so am I! By virtue of our humanity, we are creatures who commit sin. Romans 3:23 states, “…for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” We all know that sin is bad and some of us might even readily acknowledge that it leads to spiritual death and eternal damnation. But why is this so? Additionally, why do some seemingly small sins carry with them the same punishment as those we would consider large and heinous? As a preface to further discussion, let’s consider some things about God. Generally speaking, we have some correct ideas about God, but nonetheless fail to give God the credit, awe, amazement, fear, worship, contemplation and praise He so greatly deserves. There-

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fore, our ideas of God are only partially correct and vastly insufficient. Indeed, any attempt to define the infinite through the eyes of the finite is doomed to fail. I bet that if we asked people what words they use to describe God, we would probably get responses such as, creator, love, grace, mercy, savior, judge and holy. These words are appropriate and relatively easy to understand in their Biblical sense—all, that is, except for the word “holy.” We might not have any trouble using “holy” in a sentence, but to provide a working definition of the word is more difficult. What does it mean? What is holy? In trying to define “holy,” we might use the words “pure,” “undefiled,” “perfect,” “flawless,” “sacred,” etc. All these words describe the concept of holiness, but one word we might not think to use is “transcendent.” Diction-

ary.com defines it like this: transcending the universe, time, etc. To begin to understand God’s holiness, we must also consider that His perfection corresponds to His transcendence. He transcends our finite minds because He is infinite. He is not bound by the ills that we are. He is not constrained by that which constrains us. He does not work within the framework of time and space. All the words we use in relations to God’s character are descriptive, but not constrictive of God. The first step to understanding God is to understand that He exceeds our ability to understand. Our ideas and our ideas of what He has said are restrictive of Him. We’re better off, then, if we get rid of our preconceived notions of God. God will do what God chooses. The only thing that constrains God is God. Now that we have


established that God is the only holy, transcendent being, let’s combine this with the fact that He is our creator. We see through the Genesis narrative that God is the creator of the universe, and all that is within it. We also see in Genesis 1:26-28 that God gives man a special place in this creation, as the bearer of His image. Mankind was created to mirror God. Our thoughts, words and actions ought to be an expression of a faithful relationship with the Creator. God, who is holy, transcendent, eternally existing, creates man to mirror Him, to love Him, to commune with Him and to worship Him. But we know what comes next, don’t we? In the third chapter of Genesis, Adam and Eve sin. They disobey the one command that God gives them, and they die spiritually. They are separated from God—a condition that is transferred to all mankind from that minute forward. All over one little fruit? This seems kind of harsh, doesn’t it? Shouldn’t the punishment fit the crime? This concept of a fitting punishment is actually God’s idea (see Exodus 21:24). If this is the case, how can God be so hard on Adam and Eve for simply eat-

ing from a tree? Spiritual death seems a bit harsh for this crime. So what’s up? Is God unjust? It might seem so with our finite understanding of justice. Yet in God’s transcendence, Adam and Eve’s act has greater significance than simple disobedience. Instead of worshiping God, Adam and Eve question God. They no longer believe that He is their perfect provider; rather they think He is holding out on them. They believe the fruit will make them wise, and they shift their worship from God Almighty, to themselves. They commit what author and theologian R.C. Sproul refers to as “cosmic treason.” D.A. Carson refers to this as the “de-godding of God.” This is what happens when finite man questions the infinite and holy God. Questions breed doubt and doubt turns us away from God and toward ourselves. If we then choose to serve ourselves, this act of rebellion is treason toward the Creator. Our sin is not merely actions or words, it’s not even an “attitude problem.” At its root, it is rebellion against God. And this is why it must be punished. The penalty is so high, because in light of God’s beauty and perfection He could not tolerate

this vile aberration in His sight. It had to be punished. This, my friends, is what makes the cross so amazing. The more we contemplate the holiness of God, the better we understand the putrid stench that our sin—all sin—is to Him. And yet, instead of giving us justice, God sent His Son to pay the great price in our stead. That is amazing grace!

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Can You Relate

Who Are You? by

W

???

ho are you? Seriously… who are you? What makes you who you are? Where do you fit in the great, big picture puzzle of the cosmos? Where exactly do you belong, and how do you define your worth on a planet teeming with over seven billion people? Chances are most responses to these questions will involve one, or all, of the following: stunned silence, stammered exclamations, or stilted statements, such as, “I am the man!” or “I’m such a loser. Nobody likes me; everybody hates me. I guess I’ll go eat worms”. None of these comments jive with the truth about us revealed by the One Who created us. Not knowing who you are is a crisis in itself. There are men and women who experience a cognitive form of this when they literally forget their own names, their addresses, or even fail to recognize their loved ones as cruel dementia dims their minds. Christians experience something spiritually akin to this when they’ve either forgotten or are ignorant of the incredible identity change that they experience

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Thom Mollohan

when they turn to Jesus in faith, are forgiven of their sin, and are made spiritually new. In a very similar way, if we have not personally trusted Jesus as our Savior and invited Him into our lives, we have no identity to remember. On the one hand, God’s Word paints us as people hopelessly separated from the Holy Creator of the universe. Having either obviously or subtly transgressed His Law, we are incapable of conjuring up enough righteousness for ourselves in order to be accepted into His presence. Refusing to place our faith in Jesus’ work on the cross leaves us with a grim future indeed. For those who reject Jesus, “Their destiny is destruction, their god is their stomach, and their glory is in their shame. Their mind is on earthly things” (Philippians 3:19). On the other hand, the Bible explains that our God is filled with compassion and sorrow over our estate. He is not content to leave us in our desperate situation, “The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is


patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance,” (2 Peter 3:9). God’s amazing compassion for humanity is keenly evident when Jesus, God’s Son, confronts those who are spiritually lost around Him. Comparing such lost persons to lost sheep and Himself to the Good Shepherd, Jesus lets us know in no uncertain terms that He is searching for the lost in order to bring them safely home to a sweet daily fellowship with Him as well as an everlasting destiny for us by His side (John 10:1-18). The same day I realized who I was apart from Jesus – a lost person reserved for destruction – I also realized that I could become someone new. I was given a new identity, a new purpose, and a new destiny. This should cause us to have the same joy as it did Peter when he said, “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade – kept in heaven for you, who through faith are shielded by God’s power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time,” (1 Peter 1:3-5). So, if you have placed your faith in Jesus Christ, do you really know who you are? Do you know that you are a citizen of heaven (Ephesians 2:19), a conqueror (Romans 8:37), a unique child of God (Romans 8:14; 1 John 3:1), members of a royal priesthood and a holy nation (1 Peter 2:9)? Look it all up if you don’t believe it! If you know that you are all these things, how does your life demonstrate that knowledge? If you are really confident that He is truly the master of your identity and has made you into a new person, do you then live accordingly? Or, are you defeated, broken, and still enslaved to worldly patterns of thinking? Are you convinced that you have no value and are unimportant in the grand scheme of things? If any of these things describe the way you consider yourself, then allow God’s truth to dispel such lies and set your mind and your spirit free. You have unimaginable worth! Just consider what

it cost God to set you free from the prison of sin and its dreadful offspring: death! God would not have given up His own Son for you if your life were not important to Him. God explains through the words of Peter, “He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed. For you were like sheep going astray, but now you have returned to the Shepherd and Overseer of your souls,” (1 Peter 2:24-25). If you haven’t yet turned your eyes to Jesus and allowed Him to wash you free from sin and make a new person out of you, it is good to know that He still can and will set you free from your destiny of destruction if you’ll only let Him come into your life as Lord. His great promise to us is this: That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved. As the Scripture says, “Anyone who trusts in him will never be put to shame.” (Romans 10:9-11) We celebrate Christmas every year to recognize this simple promise which God makes to us. Jesus once gave up His identity as King over everything in order to provide us with an identity as heirs to His kingdom. He was born in a stable to change our destiny with the power of rebirth. He revealed Himself as our Shepherd, so that wandering sheep might know where they belong. He came to show the world by His death that we are all priceless in the grand scheme of things. Bringing goodwill between God and sinful men is quite a grand scheme, indeed. Let us live like it was Christmas everyday! Thom Mollohan and his family have ministered in southern Ohio the past 16 years and is the author of The Fairy Tale Parables. He is the pastor of Pathway Community Church and may be reached for comments or questions by email at pastorthom@pathwaygallipolis.com.

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Tool Box by

A

re you as lost as I am when it comes to getting Christmas gifts for others? Here are some conventional and not-so-conventional ideas to get you started!

The Obvious

Shiny gadgets: Everybody likes them, right? Although a bit pricey, if you want to wow somebody, it may be the way to go. There are ways to mitigate costs too. The most basic Kindle (Amazon’s e-book reader) is now only $79. Tablets, such as the iPad, that used to cost $400-500 now have cheaper brands

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that sell for $200 or less. And don’t discount refurbished items (on sale through manufacturers’ and major retailers’ Web sites) for even greater savings on perfectly functioning electronics. Just be careful you don’t get infected by tech-envy.

The Not-so-Obvious Christmas Gift Guide

Gift cards: They’re the automatic fallback when we have no idea what to get someone. As cliché as they may seem, gift cards may still be one of your best options. A little bit of stalking your target and some clever questioning should help you figure out what kind of gift card to get. Whatever you do, do not pay face value for a gift card, unless it is for a local business. If you are flexible on the amount and retailer, use a discount gift card sight, like PlasticJungle.com to get up to 35% off the face value of gift cards and free shipping. All others: spring for a Christmas card to “wrap” it in. And if you happen to remember on December 23 someone significant who also lives at a distance, gift cards can save the day with immediate, e-mail delivery.

Jeffrey Bridgman

Entertainment: If you know what kind of music, movies or games the people on your list like, you can save them the hassle of buying it themselves with your gift card.

The Not-So-Obvious

The gift of backup: Good friends don’t let friends not have backups. Whether it’s an external hard drive, USB key, or online service, there’s no excuse for not backing up. Your operating system probably comes with backup software built in. You can set it up for your friends, parents, and grandparents. Too impersonal? How about converting your family’s old photos, home videos, and slides to digital media? Since it’s so easy to make copies of those, why not give copies to all of your family members? Or create a photo book online, at Walmart or another retail photography store. Handmade gifts: Unlike the shiny gadget option above, hand-made gifts are usually found pretty cheap. But small meaningful gifts on which you spent considerable time and effort may be far more valuable than anything money could buy. Let’s go back to those family photos. You can take inspiration from their favorite things or use an inside joke and make something special out of it. Try visiting craft stores like Hobby Lobby for inspiration. One favorite idea is to make a personalized scripture jar for someone special. For example, maybe a friend or relative suffered a loss of a spouse or parent in


the last months. You could find a daily scripture with themes of hope, renewal and encouragement to print or write out on decorative paper and then drop in a hand-decorated box or jar. Each day the recipient can pick out a scripture and think of you. The thing that changed my life: Maybe it’s a book, song, movie, or a piece of art, but you can share it, inscribed or with a tasteful note explaining why it is special to you. For me it might be a book by C.S. Lewis that got me through a hard time in my life, or a movie that isn’t full of special effects, but tells a beautiful and moving story, nonetheless. Letters: Don’t know what to buy Mom? A letter telling her how much you appreciate her may mean far more to her than any gift you could buy. Alternatively, if you have a large extended family, you probably aren’t going to buy gifts for everyone, but you could send out a letter, letting them know you miss them and what’s going on in your life. Time: Maybe the biggest gift you can give is your time. That may mean taking the time to write out an e-mail to a distant friend, or giving them a call. You might just spend some time hanging out and chatting with someone instead of rushing through your day. Or maybe it means doing something a bit more organized, like a... Trip: Take a trip to some place special. Maybe a scenic drive or a weekend road trip together to see

their favorite band, or you could just go shopping or see a movie together. Helping out: You can volunteer your time for some good cause, such as helping with your church’s Christmas program, or even helping to decorate for your family Christmas celebration. The gift of service is always a good gift. How about detailing a friend or relative’s car? Charity: It is becoming increasingly more popular to make a charitable contribution in honor of a friend or loved one in lieu of a gift to that person. This makes so much sense – socially and spiritually – that it’s a bandwagon we all should jump on. The options are countless: food banks, homeless shelters, programs such as Toys for Tots which give gifts to children, or choosing to sponsor a child through organizations such as Compassion or WorldVision, Heifer International, Mercy Ships, Smile Train and local charities like the crisis pregnancy center or even a gift to a university. Prayer: You can pray for the persecuted Church, for unsaved friends, or for the spiritual growth of family members. The gift of prayer can be a powerful gift from a righteous man!

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On

the

Couch

N N Whenever I do not do what is right, by default, I do what is wrong.

by

Randy Kosloski

Do the Math: No Wrongs Don’t Make a Right GGGG GGGG G G G G

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he most uncomfortable spot in my world is sitting on my own therapist couch. Just like most people who have sat on the couch, I waited too long before deciding to have a seat. It took me so long to realize there was a problem because it wasn’t just one bad decision which landed me in my painful situation. I became complacent about being bullied, and in an attempt to avoid confrontation, I found license to ignore the bullying of those I loved and respected, which ultimately turned me into someone that I disliked. After a pattern of poor decisions and ignoring the destruction that resulted, I finally sought out change. Nonetheless, there is some merit in my victimization. Not only did it give me a topic for this month’s article, but it also taught me that whenever I do not do what is right, by default, I do what is wrong. Consistently acting inappropriately had an adverse impact on me over time and resulted in selfloathing and displacement – an unconscious response involving the transfer of emotions,

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ideas or wishes from their original object to a more acceptable substitute. As I attempted to council myself from my own couch, I considered myself the most handsome and intelligent man who had ever sat on it – my humility even impressed me. But this wasn’t really the truth. Despite all this I hated myself. I had been bullied by an authority figure and that relationship motivated me to lie, conceal and resent my situation. Although the bullying had stopped, I was not able to revert back into the person I believed myself to be. Another dangerous result of being aware of my suffering was the belief that somehow suffering had made me righteous. This false belief was untenable, however, when confronted with the reality that, in addition to being abused, I was also sitting by while my friends and colleagues were belittled. It was this cowardice that I hated the most. What I originally believed to be an act of righteousness turned out to be one of my greatest offenses: doing nothing. Matthew 21 and Luke 19 talk about Jesus driving out the venders from the temple,


turning tables over and angrily rebuking them. Jesus understood that allowing the church to suffer at the hands of the bullying religious elite was wrong. Jesus also understood that turning the other way was not meekness or righteousness, but was sinful. Jesus got angry on behalf of the average believer. Jesus refused to allow His people to be bullied. He stood up to the religious authorities for their sake and for ours. Jesus embodied the truth, as articulated by John Wesley, that there is no “negative good” – justification earned by avoiding wrong. Failure to do the right thing is actually doing the wrong thing. It would be easy enough to push the blame on to my bully and his unenlightened management practices, but it would be accurate to also acknowledge that, as a Christfollower, I did not walk in His way when I was given the choice. Instead, I cowered. I have not really come to a lot of conclusions through my line of work – Christian counselling. Every time I think I have an answer, God sends me circumstances or Bible verses which thrash my assumptions. This has happened enough that I usually don’t bother trying anymore. But I still have a few hypotheses intact. One of these holds that most reasonable people, in a reasonable state of mind, want to do the right thing. What makes that hard is when they have to sacrifice something in order to do right thing. People are rarely brave enough to sacrifice what they are for what they could become. The problem with that is in trying to preserve ourselves, we compromise ourselves. I made so many excuses for not intervening when I should have that once my opportunity had passed; I forgot what I was trying to protect myself from by my passivity. In doing so, I lost my sense of self and hated what I had become. By repeatedly failing to do the right thing, I eventually lost my sense of moral direction. If you can spare yourself from the inevitable agony I experienced, it’s worth taking the high road. In my first meetings with clients I always give them the choice to sit in the chair or sit on the couch. Almost everyone chooses the couch but a few have chosen the chair. People

usually assume that the choice I give them is some kind of psychological test. I’m not nearly that insightful. I’m just being nice. The point is that I have occasionally sat on my couch, and found that while it is physically comfortable, it is emotionally uncomfortable for me. I do not mind reflecting or even changing, but what I do not like is having to admit that I am wrong about something, especially after spending considerable time in prayer regarding it. I feel even worse when I consider the damage to others my ignorance or cowardice may have caused. But that is just what we can expect when we refuse to do what is right for the sake of what is safe or for the sake of what is considered right enough. In his book Drops from a Leaky Tap, George Verwer writes, “The good is the enemy of the best.” Given this, we should not settle for what is only good enough while praying for the best. When I suffer I need to ask myself, “Am I suffering out of service to God or neighbour, or am I suffering out of fear of my own loss.” There’s a big difference. We should seek the blessings which are ours when we boldly chose righteousness, “Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. Do not fear what they fear; do not be frightened,” (1 Peter 3: 13, 14). A Veggie Tales retelling of the story of Esther holds some good advice to adults alike, “You never have to be afraid of doing what is right.” We shouldn’t be with our Father cheering us on and enabling us with His power.

"The good is the enemy of the best." -George Verwer 15

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Holiday Special

A Charlie Brown Kind of Christmas by

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Thomas Mollohan

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he Annually watching “A Charlie Brown Christmas” with my children, compels me to consider the wistful wisdom of Peanuts comic strip creator Charles Schultz. The world of Snoopy, Linus, Schroeder, Lucy, Sally, Peppermint Patty and the rest is a bitter-sweet rehearsal of what so many people experience in real life. The gentle approach Schultz takes also helps us to find humor in the daily ironies that come their way. Charlie Brown’s idealism in the Christmas special is really a contrast between those possessing a hunger for more than this life can give, and those who have not only forgotten the real point of Christmas, but who have forgotten the focus of Christianity, as well. The expectation for Charlie Brown to return with what others considered to be a perfect Christmas tree – a false, aluminum one – symbolizes a spiritual danger for Christians. It’s often easy for us to build artificial spiritual constructs and believe these things are the means to personal happiness. What are these artificial spiritual constructs? They commonly take the shape of possessions, which we can then consider as proof of our spiritual well-being. For some, this is simply an accumulation of things that are generally associated with success, such as expensive cars, clothes or the latest gadgetry. We may wrongly assume that having all this stuff is a sign of special favor from heaven. For others, a church can be an artificial construct. It’s as if we think God himself, upon contemplating these enormous, fashionable facilities, might exclaim, “Wow! Now that’s a church I want to attend!” Maybe this is an impetus for those of fickle faith to frequent church. The thought process may be something like, “If I am going to church anyway,


wouldn’t it be cool to rub elbows with God?” Artificial spiritual constructs may also develop out of what we might consider good works. Many people today are keeping score in their spiritual lives. They quickly compare what they do and how often they do it to the actions of others. Tithing, working in a church building and volunteering at church events are all esteemed by some like feathers in a spiritual cap. Jesus warned against this type of thinking, “Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You give a tenth of your spices – mint, dill and cummin. But you have neglected the more important matters of the law – justice, mercy and faithfulness. You should have practiced the latter, without neglecting the former, (Matthew 23:23). While it is certainly not wrong to be involved in serving, our work for the Lord is not meant to replace our relationship with Him! Too often we become satisfied with what we do, or what we have, and fail to seek more desirable things like the presence of God in our lives. Actually, an artificial spiritual construct is nothing less than an idol. It is something we’ve concocted either by fashioning it literally with our hands or by imagining it with our minds. This then robs the rightful position which God should have in our lives: the only true source of personal fulfillment, joy and peace. Charlie Brown’s war with commercialism aside, the real meaning of Christmas is pictured best in the little tree that no one else wanted. The tree might also represent all those who are poor in spirit who will inherit the kingdom of God through their faith in Jesus (see Matthew 5:3). The lowly of heart – materially well off, or not – are the very ones who are in the best frame of mind to receive God’s blessing. They are the ones who can most easily see that there really isn’t any hope without God. Instead of finding rejection at the hands of their Creator, they will find the tenderness, compassion, and understanding which the prophet spoke about in Isaiah 42:3, “A bruised reed he will not break, and a smoldering wick he will not snuff out.” While we may not have time for all the lowly of heart we meet in

our daily routine, God always acknowledges their need, their hurt and their emptiness. Perhaps Charlie Brown’s little tree isn’t only a picture of the weak, forlorn and barren; maybe it also symbolizes Christ. He came in the weakest human form – and infant – and was forlorn from day one when even the Bethlehem inns had no room for him. Wrapped in rags, lying in a feedbox of a farm animal, he was a barren as anything can be. Although we pity the scraggly tree Charlie Brown ended up with, the truth is that Charlie Brown needed the tree much more than the tree needed him. This endearing, renowned blockhead is the one who is clearly bereft of purpose, emptied of a sense of his own personal value and filled with questions that no one can answer. That is, until Linus wisely recites the familiar Biblical account of Jesus’ birth from Luke 2:1-14. Unlike the aluminum Christmas trees, the love of God is real and alive, reaching to the humble heart of anyone searching in sincerity. If your heart is humble enough to admit that it isn’t filled with a lasting sense of peace and purpose, it is time to stop chasing the flashing lights of the world whirling by at breakneck speed. It is time to start looking to the One who entered our world through a lowly manger, only to pour out His life on a rugged cross. It is time to look to the One Who rose from the dead in order to seal for us a future with Him forever. May your Christmas be focused on the only One who can give it meaning… Jesus. “The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth” John 1:14. Thom Mollohan and his family have ministered in southern Ohio the past 16 ½ years. He is the pastor of Pathway Community Church and the author of The Fairy Tale Parables. He may be reached for comments or questions by email at pastorthom@pathwaygallipolis.com.

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Cornered

by

Grace

Sheep Food by

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ear is an extremely powerful motivator, but guilt also can cause us to do things which we really don’t want to do. Either of these can handcuff us and force us into a protective shell. The more we understand the heart of God revealed in the Bible, the less we can attribute either of these driving factors to our benevolent Father. The Christian gospel we trust simply isn’t about God motivating those He deeply loves with fear and guilt. He absolutely doesn’t need to do so. His love is abundantly powerful enough, even more powerful than these negative feelings. As many times as we’ve read the passage commonly summarized as “Jesus Reinstates Peter”, we don’t seem to be able to get past Peter’s guilt trip. It’s difficult to deny that Peter was obviously suffering from guilt after having denied knowing Jesus on multiple occasions. Perhaps we can gain insight by looking at this famous dialog from the perspective of Jesus while asking, “Is laying a guilt trip on

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Rob Beames

someone really consistent with the Jesus we have come to know and love?” Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon son of John, do you truly love me more than these?” “Yes, Lord,” he said, “you know that I love you.” Jesus said, “Feed my lambs.” Again Jesus said, “Simon son of John, do you truly love me?” He answered, “Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.” Jesus said, “Take care of my sheep.” The third time he said to him, “Simon son of John, do you love me?” Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, “Do you love me?” He said, “Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you.” Jesus said, “Feed my sheep” (John 21:15-17). Talking to his risen Lord, Peter appears to be so guilt-ridden that he pulls the classic ploy of


deflecting blame which Adam piloted when first confronted by God in his rebellion, “‘The woman you put here with me, “blame her” (Gen 3:12). In a similar fashion, Peter objects in the verses which immediately follow as if to say to Jesus, “Hey what about John? Don’t just chastise me.” While it is obvious Peter defends himself out of a guilty conscious, he is also saddened by the line of questioning Jesus used in verse 17. Yet, we don’t know that Jesus intended to hurt him with His words. On the contrary, it’s most likely that He did not. Jesus was about to leave Peter for good, in a physical sense. They would not meet again until reunited in heaven. He needed Peter to firmly communicate a gospel of unconditional love to a nation of people who had been hammered by their leaders with God’s untouchable holiness, unbendable law and righteous indignation for over 3,000 years. What was the best way for Jesus to instill this message in Peter? We know Jesus would have chosen the perfect method, and guilt was not the answer. Naturally, Peter was probably gut-wrenched wanting to prove to Jesus that he truly did love Him, but Jesus turned the focus away from his guilt and onto the task at hand. Of course, Peter was trying to justify himself, but Jesus was beyond that. Jesus knew that Peter was already justified, because of His atoning sacrifice, and there was nothing Peter could do, or not do, to change that. Peter’s sins, including the three times he denied Him, were already forgotten, (Isaiah 43:25). Jesus turned Peter outward toward the sacred mission to love and to feed His precious flock whom He recently purchased with an infinite price. There wasn’t as much guilt involved here as may think, and it was much less than Peter apparently perceived. It was as if Jesus was responding with words similar to Peter’s, “You know that I love you, as well, or I wouldn’t have given you such an important mission to complete for Me.” In the end, did it even matter how much Peter loved Jesus? Isn’t the fact that Jesus intensely loved Peter the most important thing? Jesus wanted Peter to understand this, and He demonstrated it publically in His death, but now more personally by giv-

ing him a huge responsibility to undertake for Him. Whatever emotions or efforts Peter could muster for Jesus would eventually be insufficient then, and in the future. All that mattered is that Jesus would continue to build His church, and as He promised even before Peter’s denials, Peter would now be playing a large role in that work (Matthew 16:18). In essence, Jesus was saying to Peter, “Don’t worry about how much you love Me. Instead, you should consider how much I love you. Of course, you love Me, because I chose to love you. Now, in the same unconditional way I have loved you, in spite of your failures, love and feed the others I love, as well.” When it was all said and done, it didn’t matter how much Peter truly loved Jesus. What was important was that Jesus loved Peter, and never stopped – no matter how many times he failed. Ultimately, it doesn’t matter how much we love Jesus either. It’s difficult to believe, but He doesn’t stop loving us no matter how we have offended Him, others or ourselves. He promises to use us for His glory whenever we stop looking inward at our faults long enough to answer the call to follow Him. Peter probably didn’t feel this way at the time, but the hard questions from Jesus were actually words of encouragement. They become words of encouragement to us all. Many words from God are meant to encourage us in our frailty, if we can see through the avalanche of guilt and our fear of punishment which often hits us first. God sometimes leads us where we don’t want to go just as He was about to do with Peter. Peter needed


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to know Jesus still loved him in order to bear his new responsibilities alone. We need to be sure of His love for us daily while possessing the confidence that it doesn’t ebb and flow like the ocean’s tide, as does our obedience to Him. We must not lose site that our value is always immeasurable in His eyes because His gaze is only focused on the work on the cross. We must cling to the fact that our worth is priceless due to blood of Christ even when we sin. If we forget these things by allowing guilt to motivate us to follow Him, rather than forcing us to take full advantage of His mercy which is freely given, then we are only being moved by fear. We won’t consistently obey Him, nor will we find success in our struggle against sin. It’s His love which motivates us to obedience, rather than fear or guilt. The one closest to Jesus learned this truth, “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love” (1 John 4:18). It’s in His perfect love He wants us to respond. Peter ultimately got it. We should too!

God’s Best to You in 2012 ~The Genuine Motivation Staff On My Own Now Ministries, Inc., Publisher Rob Beames, Editor Donna Lee Schillinger with Daniela Bermudez, Page Design Kimberly M. Schluterman, Editorial Support Jeffrey Bridgman, Will Dole, Erik Guzman, Randy Kosloski and Thomas Mollohan, Contributing Writers 20

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