November 16, 2016

‘Crashing the Party’

The forgotten freshman

Alum recounts challenges during journalism career in China | Page 2

Duke’s only healthy 5-star freshman nailed two clutch 3-pointers Tuesday | Sports Page 11

The Chronicle T H E I N D E P E N D E N T D A I LY AT D U K E U N I V E R S I T Y

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 16, 2016

WWW.DUKECHRONICLE.COM

ONE HUNDRED AND TWELFTH YEAR, ISSUE 35

ICE IN HIS VEINS

Hate speech reported on campus after Trump victory

Kansas guard Frank Mason III sinks Duke with late jumper

Claire Ballentine The Chronicle After Donald Trump’s presidential election victory last Tuesday, several students have reported either experiencing or witnessing incidents involving hate speech on campus— with some noting that Trump’s volatile campaign has inspired such rhetoric.

Across the nation, incidents of violence and hate against Muslims, Jews, people of color and the LGBTQ+ community have proliferated, with the Southern Poverty Law Center reporting more than 400 instances of such harassment between Nov. 9 and Nov. 14. In downtown Durham, a wall was painted with the words, “black lives don’t matter and neither does your votes,” the day after the election. Here at Duke, students said they have witnessed similar racist remarks.

Junior Kelsey Graywill said that she and her roommate overheard someone yell “I hate n***ers” from their room in Craven Quadrangle at approximately 2 a.m. Nov. 12.

“We had heard a lot about people being aggressive and harassing people after the election, and we’ve heard about stuff like that happening on campus See HATE SPEECH on Page 3

Chris Teufel | The Chronicle Several student groups hosted an antiTrump rally by the Chapel Monday night.

|

|

Jack White | The Chronicle After Duke overcame a 10-point deficit in the final five minutes to tie the game, senior Frank Mason III won it with a jumper over Matt Jones.

Brian Pollack The Chronicle NEW YORK—For most of the second half, it looked like Duke had no chance to come back against Kansas.

Then all of a sudden, Frank Jackson stepped in and brought his team back with a pair of clutch 3-pointers.

It still was not enough.

With the Blue Devils trailing by double digits for most of the second half, the freshman guard—who did not start and was scoreless with 10 minutes left to play— provided a spark to lead Duke back in the final minutes. Jackson hit a huge 3-pointer from the wing with 20 seconds remaining that tied the game at 75.

But with 1.2 seconds left, Kansas senior Frank Mason III hit a step-back jumper from just beyond the left elbow over the outstretched arm of senior Matt Jones to give the No. 7 Jayhawks a 77-75 victory against the top-ranked Blue Devils Tuesday at Madison Square Garden in the Champions Classic.

“I just took advantage of the separation I created and just shot the ball. It felt good after it left my hand,” Mason III said. “The

|

|

|

only thing I was a little worried about was my balance. I was a little off-balance.”

Jackson’s first clutch moment was a fourpoint play that cut the Kansas lead to within four with three minutes left to play and brought life to a Duke squad that looked lost for most of the second half.

A baseline jumper by forward Carlton Bragg, Jr. put the Jayhawks (1-1) back up six before Blue Devil sophomore Luke Kennard made a layup to close the gap to 72-68.

But Mason III came up big again for the Jayhawks—converting an and-one layup for three of his 21 points to stretch the lead back to seven. Kennard—who led Duke (2-1) with 22 points—once again fought through the lane for a bucket and cut the deficit to five with 1:36 left to play.

“It’s our third game, we haven’t really been behind,” Kennard said. “The last 10 minutes, we pulled it together a little bit and made some big stops and hit some great shots. Overall, we just need to put a complete game together.”

Blue Devil co-captains Amile Jefferson and Jones both picked up their fourth fouls early in the second half, which coincided with Kansas surging back to take the lead.

After being quiet for most of the first half, the Jayhawks’ two best offensive talents—

INSIDE — News 2 Sports 11 Classified 13 Crossword 13 Opinion 14 Serving the University since 1905

|

freshman swingman Josh Jackson and Mason III—exploded for 17 points in nine minutes to spur a 23-7 run that put Duke in a 52-43 hole. Jackson and Mason III scored just four points apiece in the opening 20 minutes but poured in 28 in the second half, combining to make 15-of-22 field goals.

The Blue Devils had trouble regaining their composure after the run, and Kansas stretched its lead to 12 by the under-eight media timeout. The Jayhawk offense—which scored 99 points in their overtime loss to Indiana—took advantage of a Duke defense that had to be wary of foul trouble, shooting better than 60 percent from the field in the second half.

“I called a timeout after two minutes because we made three really bad defensive mistakes that were easy,” Blue Devil head coach Mike Krzyzewski said. “We just weren’t very good for about 10 minutes. We called a couple timeouts. Our faces weren’t good and then all of a sudden, boom—we were good, and then we were really good. Not enough.”

Each of the Blue Devils’ four guards— Kennard, Jackson, Jones and Grayson Allen— averaged double-digit points in the opening See M. BASKETBALL on Page 13

|

@dukechronicle © 2016 The Chronicle

2 | WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 16, 2016

www.dukechronicle.com

The Chronicle

Study shows kids in rural areas Jailed and blacklisted: Alum are more likely to be obese pens book on time in China Jamie Cohen The Chronicle A new report suggests that North Carolina children who live in rural counties or attend schools with high poverty levels are at a greater risk for obesity.

Published in the Journal of School Health, the study examined health data for approximately 75,000 third through fifth grade students across 317 North Carolina schools and determined whether the socioeconomic and racial compositions of each school could

Courtesy of Wikimedia Commons Students attending high-poverty schools or living in rural counties were more likely to be obese, the study found.

predict trends in student obesity. Study co-authors Joy Piontak, a research analyst at the Duke Center for Child and Family Policy, and Michael Schulman, a professor at North Carolina State University, said they analyzed the heights and weights of students and built corresponding statistical models based on the represented schools and counties.

The investigators found that students who live in rural areas were 1.25 times more likely to be obese than their urban counterparts, when the socioeconomic and racial compositions of each county were controlled for. Additionally, students attending high-poverty schools were found to be 1.5 times more likely to be obese than students attending lowpoverty schools.

“People tend to think of concentrated poverty as an inner-city problem, but there is deep poverty in rural communities,” Piontak said. “We need to better understand how the challenges which rural areas are facing are different from those which urban sectors are facing.”

Piontak pointed at food insecurity, poverty, the inability to recover from economic recession and a lack of access to grocery stores as some of the key contributors to the higher obesity levels in rural areas.

Of the students analyzed, 20 percent were determined to be obese—a rate relatively higher than the national average. Students were defined as obese if they had a Body Mass Index at or above See OBESITY on Page 3

Bre Bradham The Chronicle Scott Savitt has seen nearly all aspects of Chinese life during his two decades as a journalist in the country—including the inside of a jail cell.

Savitt, currently the in-house EnglishChinese translator for The New York Times, graduated from Duke in 1985 after becoming one of the first exchange students to go to China in 1983. He returned to the country as a foreign correspondent for the Los Angeles Times. During his time in China, he witnessed the Tiananmen Square protests and was imprisoned for publishing his own newspaper. He returned to Duke Tuesday to share his experience with the Duke East Asian Nexus and discuss his book “Crashing the Party.”

“In the summer of 2000, I was looking out the window of my office, drinking my morning tea,” Savitt said. “All of a sudden, all of these police cars started driving up.

At first I thought, ‘Oh, someone’s going to have a bad day!’ Then I realized that someone was me.”

The journalist, who wrote for The Chronicle when at Duke, was handcuffed and escorted to a Beijing jail, where he would remain for the next month. His newspaper— the “Beijing Scene,” the first independent English-language newspaper in the country— was shut down.

During his imprisonment, Savitt said he practiced meditation and refused to eat. He began writing the first draft of his book on toilet paper in his Chinese prison cell.

Bre Bradham | The Chronicle Journalist and Duke alum Scott Savitt was imprisoned after starting his own Englishlanguage newspaper in China.

After being released from jail 30 days later, he was deported to San Francisco and “blacklisted” from traveling to China.

“As a journalist, you want to see everything.

It was really a good experience, actually,” he said of his prison stint. “You come face-to-face with your demons.”

Savitt describes this experience in his book, which covers his two decades in the country and the struggles of being a Western journalist abroad. He compared Chinese society’s view of journalism to that of sausage—they might like the finished product, but don’t want to see See CHINA on Page 3

THE BLUE DEVILS KNOW THE MEANING OF SUCCESS. IN THE FINANCIAL ARENA, SO DO WE.

For decades, Duke University’s pursuit of excellence on and off the court has inspired us as we help you pursue your own definition of success.

Enroll in your retirement plan today at TIAA.org/Duke.

TIAA-CREF Individual & Institutional Services, LLC, Teachers Personal Investors Services, Inc., and Nuveen Securities, LLC, Members FINRA and SIPC, distribute securities products. ©2016 Teachers Insurance and Annuity Association of America-College Retirement Equities Fund, 730 Third Avenue, New York, NY 10017

C33594a

The Chronicle

HATE SPEECH from page 1 before but had never actually heard that in our quad,” she said.

She noted that although incidents of hate speech are nothing new at Duke, Trump’s campaign has made people more comfortable sharing racist views, adding that she thinks there are more Trump supporters on campus than most realize.

“I absolutely think there are more people than we originally thought,” she said. “I think that came through on election night, and I think that more and more now that he has been elected, people feel more comfortable talking about how they actually feel and what they actually support.”

Junior Sade Abiodun also reported walking on campus behind a group of students joking about racism.

“Part of the group in front of me began joking and laughing about how much one of them (a white male) hated black people,” she wrote in an email.

Abiodun noted that the student said “I hate black people” over and over again and also bragged that he was “too racist for Alabama.” Another student in the group said her family was biased against Asians, Abiodun added. Many of them said that they had voted for Trump.

She shared the encounter on her Facebook page, which received more than 460 reactions.

“This type of thought process isn’t only something going on in ‘distant rural America,’ this was going on on a college campus, on Duke University’s campus,” Abiodun wrote.

Some students used the All Duke Facebook page to warn others about hate speech incidents on campus.

Junior Daniela Saucedo recalled eating a late night meal in an Edens common room

www.dukechronicle.com

with friends when another student passed by the windows yelling hateful and racist things, along with, “Trump is our president now. We won, you lost.”

“Donald Trump gave people the confidence and voice to express their bigotry, but he will not take away the confidence and voice of marginalized people. I encourage everyone to report incidents to the police and to your peers,” she wrote in the All Duke post, adding that she had alerted the Duke University Police Department to the incident.

Micheal Schoenfeld, vice president for public affairs and government relations, noted that he has not heard of any instances of hate speech following the election but that students should use resources such as reporting to the Student Affairs staff or DUPD if they experience it.

In response to the hateful rhetoric, students began circulating a petition Tuesday for Duke to declare itself a “sanctuary campus” by refusing to release information about students’ immigration status or to comply with immigration authorities regarding deportations. It also asks that Duke guarantee domestic tuition rates to previously awarded Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals recipients and undocumented students.

As of Tuesday night, more than 280 people had signed the petition.

Students at Brown University, Yale University and Columbia University have also recently called on their colleges to become sanctuary campuses.

“We must uphold our stated commitments to diversity, justice, and inclusion,” the Duke petition reads. “We will be following up diligently with Duke community members, including students, faculty, alumni and you, the administration. This is not a moment when we can afford silence, words of comfort or your pity or sympathy.”

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 16, 2016 | 3

OBESITY from page 2

CHINA from page 2

the 95th percentile for peers of the same age and sex.

Rural areas can often have trouble funding programs that work to improve health.

“We know that high poverty schools have had to divert money from physical activity and nutritious food to core subjects,” Piontak said. “Social scientists have found that food in schools with higher levels of poverty tends to be of lower quality.”

However, solutions are within reach.

Piontak noted that public schools often serve as critical intervention sites for the prevention of childhood obesity.

At the community level, she added, the government should tackle questions related to the resources already available, such as whether food stamps are distributed equally among families.

“We need to support communitylevel initiatives aimed at improving nutrition, food availability and food access with the idea that communities need to be mobilized and form coalitions to best address these health issues,” Schulman said.

N.C. State recently received new funding from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention to study the North Carolina counties with the highest obesity rates. Schulman noted that the team plans to direct the funding toward research as well as public initiatives to improve physical activity and food availability within schools and communities.

“Obesity is a complex problem, and no one single study will resolve it,” he said.

“Studies and interventions can result in evidence based initiatives which can be applied to create a positive impact.”

how it’s made.

One of the biggest stories to come from China during his time there was the 1989 Tiananmen Square massacre. The Duke alum noted that he was the same age as the student leaders who organized the protests, making his connection to the event even more personal.

He said the massacre was wholly unnecessary, and that the government deciding to send in the military was a “conscious” decision.

“They could have cleared that Square with no guns, easily. That was something totally different,” Savitt said. “The leadership did not handle it well. Talking with them would have gotten them to leave easily with just a promise to work towards democracy, but democracy is messy.”

Savitt also commented on the current state of journalism in China, noting that it mostly consists of propaganda.

But it is important to fight against such censorship, he said, even though the danger associated with fighting censorship can be palpable. Several journalists he knows have been imprisoned because of it, he added.

Junior Ayden Sng, a member of Duke East Asian Nexus and one of the talk’s organizers, said that he appreciated Savitt’s perspective.

“I think it was very meaningful because he comes from Duke,” Sng said. “I feel that it is very rare to find a Western perspective on something that is so uniquely Chinese.

The fact that he can give us a modern perspective contextualized by 20 years in China—that is very hard to come by.”

Savitt, however, said that he would do things differently if he was first going into journalism today.

“Now, I wouldn’t go to China to be a journalist,” he said. “I would stay right here.

This is going to be the front line going forward.”

4 | WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 16, 2016

The Chronicle

www.dukechronicle.com

A Fracked Gas Power Plant at Duke University?

The accelerating climate crisis requires leadership – not an expansion of fossil fuels.

• The proposed Duke Energy power plant would increase campus greenhouse emissions by 61%.

• It would increase local air pollution, barely improve campus power reliability and perpetuate the climate-destructive fracking boom.

• Methane leaking and venting from US natural gas operations is making the climate crisis rapidly worse. It’s likely a key factor in the record-breaking, three-year global heat wave.

• A large excess of regional power means the plant would unnecessarily boost rates for all Duke Energy customers.

• The University has many clean energy options, including huge solar power potential at prices lower than it’s now paying for electricity.

See NC WARN’s report on an alternate path for Duke University: bit.ly/2eSvrbV.

Building People Power for Climate & Energy Justice

Take Action!

Urge Duke University President Richard Brodhead to reject Duke Energy’s expansion of climate-wrecking fracked gas on campuses. Tell him to join Stanford and others using climate-protective energy solutions: President@duke.edu.

President Brodhead, we need your leadership to help avert runaway climate chaos.

ncwarn.org • 919-416-5077 • PO Box 61051, Durham, NC 27715

Paid for by NC WARN

R

The Chronicle

www.dukechronicle.com

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 16, 2016 | 5

recess

VOLUME 18, ISSUE 10

NOVEMBER 16, 2016

NC Comicon comes to Durham Duke cosplayers showcase skills at event, page 7

Guided by Voices plays Cat’s Cradle Band loses some of its signature sound, page 8

Filbert Comics

Want to change your major?, page 9

Leonard Cohen, 1934-2016 Singer, songwriter, legend

R recess editors What did the editor say?

Dillon Fernando ..........................blah

Christy Kuesel ............................ouch Jessica Williams ........................nope Georgina Del Vecho.................. here!!

Drew Haskins .............. ruined my day Kirby Wilson ........................... answer Tim Campbell .............................. hah Alex Griffith ...............................m.i.a.

Aditya Joshi .............................. who?

More Online

Check out the Recess online page for more stories!

The Chronicle

www.dukechronicle.com

recess

6 | WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 16, 2016

Taco Bell gets a bad rap. Everyone knows the classic jokes made about it: that it’s gross, that the food is fake, that it gives you uncontrollable diarrhea. While I’m no spokesman for the magnificent fastfood chain that is Taco Bell, I feel a moral obligation to speak my mind, and to right the wrongs that have been done to my favorite fake Mexican food establishment.

By the time that you are done reading this article, I hope to have convinced you that Taco Bell is a respectable and laudable dining establishment.

First and foremost, we must delve into the concept of honesty. People complain that the food at Taco Bell is fake, and while the ingredients might be questionable at best, Taco Bell’s soul is truthful and kind.

There are many definitions of “honest,” and many ways that this word can be applied to food. In the context of fast food, I believe that honesty doesn’t refer to the quality of ingredients, but the mutual understanding that the fast food chain has with its customers.

Unlike Burger King, Taco bell doesn’t try to convince you that its food is “flamegrilled” or “home-style” (as in the case of the Homestyle Cheeseburger at BK, which, from what I can tell, is just a cheeseburger).

Unlike McDonald’s, Taco Bell doesn’t claim to have “quality ingredients.” Taco Bell doesn’t beat around the bush: if you’re in a Taco Bell, it’s because you want to stuff your face with grease, plain and simple.

Nobody’s under the delusion that they’re making positive life choices when they eat a hot pile of beef stuffed into a gigantic Dorito. There’s no doublethink of trying to convince yourself you’re being healthy at a Taco Bell, and customers appreciate that.

By being honest about what it is, Taco Bell tells its customers that making the decision to eat Taco Bell is okay, and not something to be ashamed of. It accepts itself, and in so doing allows us to accept ourselves.

sign up.

Be the first to know about new arrivals, special collections, the latest in technology, sales events, textbook buyback and more.

For more information, visit our website at www.dukestores.duke.edu and click on the BTFTK icon on the left.

Our Privacy Policy: We respect your right to personal privacy. We promise to use this subscription service for the express purpose of keeping you informed of only those services that you have requested. Your personal information will not be disclosed to any third parties. We hope you will find our e-mails of benefit. We promise to keep them informative and to-the-point. You will have the option of unsubscribing from this service with each e-mail campaign.

OPERATION: Stores Administration PUBLICATION: Chronicle

Another complaint that people have at Taco Bell is that everything on the menu is too repetitive. Again, I am compelled to disagree with these claims. Taco Bell is commendable for its commitment to stick to what it knows. Despite having a menu with dozens of items on it, I’m fairly sure that Taco Bell only keeps about seven ingredients in its kitchen. However, the magic of Taco Bell doesn’t come from its pantry. Instead of trying to appease customers with a wide variety of flavors, Taco Bell repackages some iteration of beans cheese, beef and sad vegetables in a variety of fun and tasty shapes and sizes.

While some might see this as a negative, I see it as one of the best things about Taco Bell. When you go to Taco Bell, you aren’t faced with the tough decision of

editor’s note choosing between a Wendy’s Baconator or an Asiago Ranch Chicken Club—instead, you get to choose what form your meal will adopt before you stuff it into your gaping maw. With just a few simple ingredients, Taco Bell is able to produce a Pandora’s box of crescents, tubes, circles, hexagons and other shapes that inspire joy in their consumers without regard to their shape or size. Rumor has it that they’re working on a way to inject beef juice intravenously into your femoral artery, but until that day I will continue to content myself with the Crunchwrap Supreme.

As a side note, Taco Bell will never make a mistake with your order. Sure, they might give you the wrong items, but the nature of

the food makes everything that Taco Bell sells pretty much interchangeable. And if they make a mistake with the preparation, what are you going to do? Complain about it? What could you possibly say, that the greasy, unhealthy food that you ordered is too greasy? That the “cheese” that overlays your limp chalupa isn’t “cheese”ey enough? If you are a conscious, sensible adult making the decision to eat Taco Bell of your own accord and without being under physical duress, then you knew exactly what you were getting yourself into.

Taco Bell isn’t responsible for the mistake – you are.

A final issue that I will address is that of the digestive implications of eating Taco Bell. I won’t dispute that eating Taco Bell is tantamount to declaring nuclear war on your gastrointestinal tract. Yes, we have all had diarrhea after eating an entire Taco Twelve-Pack—but is that really such a bad thing? According to a press release issued by Business Wire in January, the global vaccine industry will be worth $61 billion by 2020.

Americans spend hundreds to thousands of dollars to receive immunizations over the course of their lifetimes, but this cost could be circumvented by the simple act of eating at Taco Bell once a day. After all, how bad are cholera or tetanus when compared to the nuclear disembowelment that follows the consumption of Tao Bell?

Not only do I believe that the pain that people experience following consumption of Taco Bell builds character, but I also hold that it keeps things in perspective.

And in this crazy world that we live in, most people could benefit by keeping an eye on the bigger picture.

This concludes my thesis on Taco Bell.

I hope that I have encouraged you to think outside the box with me, and I look forward to us all destroying our bodies with Taco Bell together.

The Chronicle

www.dukechronicle.com

recess

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 16, 2016 | 7

Local Arts

Duke cosplayers take on North Carolina Comicon Henry Chan The Chronicle

The North Carolina Comicon was held this p a s t w e e k e n d a t t h e D u rh a m C o n v e n t i o n C e n t e r.

N o w i n i t s s e v e n t h y e a r, t h e e v e n t h a d b e c o m e so large that it took over adjacent buildings and blocked downtown traffic. And yet, few at Duke noticed: despite being a fifteen-minute walk from East Campus, it could have been w o r l d s a w a y.

However, sophomore Alexus Wells had good reason to be excited. This was her first time at a convention, and she would be cosplaying.

Cosplay, a portmanteau of “costume” and “roleplay,” is a visual/per formance art that draws heavily from pop culture. By designing, creating and eventually wearing their own costumes, cosplayers portray anyone (or anything) they choose. Cosplaying groups thrive online, and conventions—such as NC Comicon, DragonCon and more—also provide spaces where the community can come together.

“Cosplaying, walking the convention floor, meeting people, going to the artists’ alley with the figurines and posters and books: that’s what the con experience is to me—getting to be a full-out nerd with other nerds,” Wells said.

At Duke there is a small cosplayer community, but no formal club exists. Many consider cosplay to be niche, which is the polite word for weird; but then again, if that were true, Wells would argue they were no weirder than anyone else.

“What about people who are really into sports?” she said. “You wear their jerseys, you paint your face, you wear the wigs, you clear your schedule for the entire weekend just to watch the Superbowl. It’s the same thing.”

L e a r n i n g c o s p l a y, a s i t t u r n e d o u t , m a y n o t b e t h a t d i f f e r e n t . S o p h i e A l m a n , a s e n i o r, spoke of her experiences of trial and error b e f o r e b e c o m i n g a s e a s o n e d c o s p l a y e r. S h e started when her mother gave her a Magneto h e l m e t f o r b i r t h d a y, a n d s o o n i t w a s a l l h e a t guns and sewing machines. By now she has a reliable method: “First I have to narrow down my list of characters, because I want to cosplay ever ything.

I look for characters that are admirable or inspirational, who also have designs I like.

Then I usually sketch out the characters, and that helps me put the costumes into my mind as separate pieces, with different layers and techniques. And then I just dive right into it,” she said.

The process could take weeks, but the results are worth it. For Alman, making costumes is about immersion, and the long process makes it all the more rewarding when the costumes are finally worn. Her favorite costume so far is Nami, a mermaid warrior from League of L e g e n d s , w h i c h s h e w o r e t o l a s t y e a r ’s S a n Diego Comic-Con. Going to conventions requires some suspension of disbelief, but it may come more easily than one expects. One moment it’s the familiar sights of Bull City, and then one notices the unusual hair color of certain pedestrians or is greeted by a lightsaber-wielding man in broad daylight and one realizes, oh, we’re not in Kansas anymore.

Inside the convention halls, one can obser ve more close encounters of the nerd kind: a booth sold broadswords hand-crafted from solid wood, and the booth next door, steampunk ray guns. Another booth offered to make one’s ears pointy like an elf ’s. There were libraries upon libraries, and prized comic books were sold in transparent plastic capsules which came with grades from a third-party certification agency (“0.5 Poor” to “10.0 Gem Mint”).

And of course, cosplayers galore. There were the usual suspects: superheroes of all stripes and franchises, anime characters and videogame protagonists. And even more were dressed as characters as fantastic as they were obscure.

All this was familiar territor y for sophomore See COMICON on Page 9

Special to The Chronicle Sophomore Reilly Johnson (right) and her friend Stephanie Strange cosplay Heaven’s Door and Rohan Kishibe.

HOT ITEM of the WEEK

Duke Fleece Sweatpants Colors: Royal, Oxford, Black Available Sizes: S - 3X Fabric Content: 60% cotton, 40% polyester

Advertised price does not include tax.

Offer cannot be combined with any other discount or promotion.

Offer valid Wednesday, November 16 through Monday, November 21, 2016, or while supplies last.

18

$

each

Compared to $3695 up to $3995 each Available in the following locations:

The University Store Upper Level, Bryan Center

Medical Center Bookstore Lower Level, Duke Clinics

Departments of Duke University Stores®

www.dukechronicle.com

recess

8 | WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 16, 2016

Local Arts

The Chronicle

Guided by Voices proves it’s still got it, sort of Will Atkinson The Chronicle

Sometime early in middle school I got it into my head that I wanted to be a rock star, or something close to it, and I signed up for guitar lessons.

Every Wednesday evening, my older brother drove me to the music shop on the back side of a strip mall where, for thirty minutes at a time, I attempted to wrap my hands around a bar chord. As I would soon learn, being a rock star takes time, calluses and (preferably) a post-pubescent vocal range. Within a couple months, I was done. (Update: I am a competent guitar player these days.

Do you know “Wonderwall”?)

I’ve forgotten nearly every detail of what happened in those lessons.

What I remember is driving there each week. One of the overlooked benefits of being a middle child is the wealth of culture handed down to you. For me, this came in the form of burned CDs my brother would play during the fifteen-minute car ride, my initiation to indie rock elder statesmen like Wilco and the Dismemberment Plan.

Of the music I heard on those car rides, a certain band stood out to me. I was perplexed by how this band packed thirty songs onto a single album, each an abrupt vignette that seemed to cut off as soon as it caught on. I was entranced by a sound at once immediate and otherworldly, intimate enough for headphones yet

rowdy enough for head-banging— and for years I could not remember its name.

It was only recently, when I came across a copy of “Bee Thousand” in a used CD store, that I rediscovered Guided by Voices, and with it, a cult following on equal footing with Phish and the Grateful Dead. Though the average bystander could be forgiven for never having heard of the band, Guided by Voices has exerted an untold influence on alternative music as leaders of the “lo-fi” movement. Their sprawling catalog dates back to 1987, to say nothing of the various offshoots and solo projects of frontman Robert Pollard. To know Guided by Voices is to enter a world with its own set of rituals and codes. They even have a chant: “G-B-V! G-B-V!” In reality, the “band” is more a collective of rotating musicians with Pollard as its nucleus. They officially disbanded in 2004, and again in 2014, but their latest tour makes it evident that as long as Pollard lives, so does Guided by Voices. When they entered the Cat’s Cradle Saturday night, it was as a different band than the so-called classic lineup that released “Bee Thousand” over twenty years ago.

Gone were the yearning melodies of Tobin Sprout, Pollard’s musical foil made in heaven. Gone were Greg Demos’ signature striped pants and Mitch Mitchell’s windmilling guitar.

In their place was a fresh lineup with a guitarist who could have passed for the son of fifty-nine-year-old Pollard.

Without all the parts that made

ASK US YOUR QUESTIONS. GIVE US YOUR OPINIONS.

Courtesy of Wikimedia Commons Guided by Voices, led by singer Robert Pollard, played Cat’s Cradle Saturday night.

the group special in the first place, something was inevitably missing.

For many devotees, Guided by Voices is a relic of the past, despite the fact that they are still putting out new material—a point which Pollard insistently peddled, though he seemed to realize their new releases weren’t on the minds of much of the audience (“Bear with us, this is a new one,” he said at one point).

But this was a Guided by Voices show nonetheless, and the GBV trademarks remained: a mic-twirling Robert Pollard, still nimble after all these years, stalked and stumbled and scissor-kicked about the stage.

They played “Game of Pricks.” They played “I Am a Scientist.” They came back out for three (three) encores.

The beer over floweth.

Seeing Guided by Voices live would have been quite an event under any circumstances. In this case, though, the band’s power punches of cathartic pop were the antidote to a week marked by hopelessness and anxiety. Guided by Voices takes all the elements of the equally fetishized and derided myth of “real Americans”—the blue-collar origins, the do-it-yourself spirit, the endless supply of Miller Lite—and weaves them into life-affirming choruses.

They urge you to motor away; they remind you that you can never be strong, you can only be free; they ask if you’re amplified to rock.

In this time of doubt, Guided by Voices is the American band we need.

And they’ve still got it—for the most part. The club is open.

Dean’s awarD for InclusIve excellence In GraDuate eDucatIon

N

ominate a Duke department, program, or interdisciplinary initiative that has demonstrated a commitment to creating an environment of inclusive excellence within the Duke University Graduate School. Inclusive excellence is reflected not only in student or faculty demographics, but also in the departmental program and climate; curriculum; intellectual discourse; and the recruitment, retention, and graduation of individuals underrepresented in the discipline, field, or area.

Connect with Duke University Stores!

Give us your feedback on any of our operations via our online question/comment page, DevilSpeak.

Just visit www.dukestores.duke.edu and click on the DevilSpeak link.

Duke University Stores.

We are the Stores that Work for You! OPERATION: Stores Administration PUBLICATION: Chronicle

Nomination Deadline: December 2, 2016 Details: gradschool.duke.edu/InclusiveAward

The Chronicle

www.dukechronicle.com

recess

Anthony Labonte | Filbert Comics

COMICON from page 7 Reilly Johnson, who has seemingly built much of her life around cosplay. With more than 8000 Tumblr followers, she is a bona fide internet celebrity and spends much of her time going to conventions around the countr y. On the side, she makes costumes by commission, both domestically and internationally.

Johnson likes using the word “outlandish” when describing her cosplay. Her recent inspiration was the anime series “JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure,” which she called a “crazy series that hardly anybody in the US has heard of.” And while her work put aesthetics first, there were also bigger ideas at play. “‘JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure’ plays around a lot with the idea of per formance of gender, and breaking loose of stereotypes,” Johnson said. “It’s a ver y critical for myself and other people to build that confidence to break free of constraining societal norms.”

Unlike other Duke cosplayers, Johnson does not only cosplay for fun; she sees herself being a designer for Disney or Cirque du Soleil o n e d a y, a n d c o n v e n t i o n s l i k e N C C o m i c o n are platforms to showcase her skills. But she is adamant that this subculture is about more than just craft and careers.

“Cosplay is a segue to making good, close, lifelong friends,” she said. “It started as ‘ooh, we are cosplaying as the same character,’ and then we just bonded from there. At first they see you as that character, and your interactions are kind of shallow. But it almost always evolves into something much deeper.”

Special to The Chronicle S e n i o r S o p h i e A l ma n c o s p l a y s Na m i , a m e r m a i d w a r r i o r f ro m L e a g u e o f L e g e n d s, w h i c h s h e w o re t o l a s t y e a r ’s S a n D i e g o C o m i c- C o n .

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 16, 2016 | 9

Great Art Meets Great Food

Food and Flex Points Always Accepted at the Nasher Museum Café! nasher.duke.edu/cafe

Admission is always free for Duke students.

10 10 || WEDNESDAY, WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER NOVEMBER 16, 16, 2016 2016

The Chronicle

www.dukechronicle.com

recess

CAN’T MISS EVENTS NOVEMBER 16-20

November Dances 2016

Friday, November 18, 7:30pm Saturday, November 19, 7:30pm Reynolds Industries Theater in the Bryan Center on Duke’s West Campus Tickets range from $17 to $7 for students

PHOTO CREDIT: ALEC HIMWICH

The Dance Program invited former Bill T. Jones/Arnie Zane Dance Company member Shayla-Vie Jenkins to restage “Power/Full” for Modern Repertory students, said Andrea E. Woods Valdés, Associate Professor of the Practice of Dance. In addition to the “Power/ Full” piece, there will be five original pieces choreographed by Duke faculty, students, and an alum. “The students are able to learn a piece from a legendary choreographer by someone who is, to me, a legendary dancer,” said Woods Valdés.

CIOMPI QUARTET LUNCHTIME CLASSICS Wednesday, November 16 12pm Rubenstein Library Holsti-Anderson Family Assembly Room 153

SCREEN/SOCIETY – AMI SHOWCASE – 2016 AMI STUDENT FILM FESTIVAL Thursday, November 17 7pm Bryan Center Griffith Film Theater

DUKE WIND SYMPHONY: AN EVENING WITH JOHN MACKEY Thursday, November 17 8pm Baldwin Auditorium

IBSEN’S THE WILD DUCK: PERFORMANCE PLUS POST-SHOW CONVERSATION WITH IBSEN SCHOLAR TORIL MOI November 18 8pm Sheafer Theater $10-$15

GALLERY TALK: ARTIST MEL CHIN AND AUTHOR ROY SCRANTON Friday, November 18 2pm Nasher Museum of Art

SHARA WORDEN & SO PERCUSSION Friday, November 18 8pm Baldwin Auditorium $10 Duke Students, $15-$38 Otherwise

SKETCHING IN THE GALLERIES WITH MARK IWINSKI Saturday, November 19 10am Nasher Museum of Art

DUKE OPERA WORKSHOP: MUSIC OF HAROLD ARLEN Saturday, Nov. 19 at 8 pm and Sunday, November 20 3pm East Duke 201 – Nelson Music Room

Brought to you by Department of Art, Art History and Visual Studies, Center for Documentary Studies, Dance Program, Music Department, Master of Fine Arts in Experimental & Documentary Studies, Nasher Museum of Art, Screen/Society, Theater Studies with support from the Office of the Vice Provost of the Arts.

The Chronicle

Sports

www.dukechronicle.com

The Chronicle

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 16, 2016 | 11

THE BLUE ZONE

BEYOND THE ARC: DUKE VS. KANSAS

sports.chronicleblogs.com www.dukechronicle.com

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 16, 2016

MEN’S BASKETBALL

DUKE’S NEXT CLUTCH FRESHMAN?

Frank Jackson nails two late 3-pointers to spark futile comeback against Kansas Hank Tucker The Chronicle NEW YORK—Two years ago, the ball always seemed to find freshman Tyus Jones’ hands when games were on the line.

Frank Jackson was not as heralded as the Blue Devils’ former starting point guard coming out of high school, but showed Tuesday he might have the same clutch gene as the one that delivered Duke its fifth national title.

The freshman guard scored all 11 of his points in the last 10 minutes of the game as Duke gradually clawed back from a double-digit hole, knocking down the biggest shot of his young career with 20 seconds left. Duke was trailing 75-72 when sophomore guard Luke Kennard drove into the lane and fired a pass to Jackson a couple of feet beyond the 3-point line on the left wing.

Jackson calmly buried the triple to tie the game, eliciting a huge response from the Blue Devil bench.

“Luke made a good drive, and as soon as he kicked it back, I was ready to shoot it,” Jackson said. “It felt good leaving my hand.”

Kansas point guard Frank Mason III responded with a game-winning pullup jumper on the other end with 1.8 seconds left, but nobody in the crowd of nearly 20,000 people at Madison Square Garden would have expected the game to come down to a last-second shot as the second half progressed.

The Blue Devils were playing stagnant

Jack White | The Chronicle Frank Jackson scored all 11 of his points late in the second half as Duke erased a double-digit deficit.

offense and lazy defense as they watched the game rapidly slip away from them, and Jackson’s poor play was one of the biggest reasons why.

He played 15 minutes in the first half, which is hard to tell from looking at the rest of his numbers at halftime— zero points, zero assists, zero rebounds, zero steals, zero fouls and just two shot attempts, both misses.

“I didn’t want to play the way I did in the first half. I kind of let my team down,” Jackson said. “I can play a much

better game, but I know my teammates trust me.”

After more of the same in his first few minutes of the second half, the Alpine, Utah, native suddenly started to make plays all over the floor.

Jackson pulled down his first rebound of the game with 9:26 remaining on the offensive glass and drew a foul on the Jayhawks’ star freshman Josh Jackson—his fourth of the game—six seconds later. Frank Jackson sank both free throws to get

on the scoreboard.

Duke still trailed by 10 when Josh Jackson fouled out with a little more than five minutes remaining, but Frank went to work again to chip into the lead. He cut to the basket and made a reverse layup after a feed from Matt Jones with 4:33 remaining to cut the deficit to 67-59, and with 3:04 remaining, he drilled what would be the biggest shot of his career for about two and a half minutes.

Kennard drove baseline and found Jackson in the left corner, where he swished the triple as Mason III hit his arm during his release for a foul. When Jackson knocked down the free throw, he had chopped an eight-point deficit in half with one play.

“He showed great maturity. He did a great job of calming down and finding his spots and making big plays for us,” graduate student Amile Jefferson said.

“He did a great job down the stretch of being poised and of hitting big shots.”

Jackson’s final statline was modest—11 points on 3-of-5 shooting with three rebounds, no assists and two turnovers.

He was one of five Duke players that scored in double figures, and ultimately, it was not enough to get the Blue Devils the win.

But when Duke needed a spark to get back into the game, Jackson played with no fear on the biggest stage of his career.

“He plays with a ton of confidence, and that’s what we need out of him,” junior Grayson Allen said. “He’s not See JACKSON on Page 13

FOOTBALL

Pittsburgh also riding high after major upset Mitchell Gladstone The Chronicle

Coming off its own high-profile upset during the most dramatic weekend of the college football season, the Panthers are hoping to avoid the lulls that have plagued them so far in ACC play.

Just two days after Duke upset then-No. 15 North Carolina, Pittsburgh went into Death Valley Saturday as nearly threetouchdown underdogs but managed to knock off previously-unbeaten Clemson 43-42 on a 48-yard field goal from Chris Blewitt in the game’s waning seconds.

Blewitt—who shanked a potential gamewinner from just 26 yards out when the Panthers and Blue Devils matched up at Heinz Field in Pittsburgh two years ago—had his earlier 53-yard field goal attempt blocked by the Tigers.

Despite the earlier setback, the senior

came through in the clutch, giving his team its third conference win of the season and making the Panthers bowleligible for the ninth straight year.

“It was a statement win for the program, for the university,” Pittsburgh head coach Pat Narduzzi said at his weekly press conference. “I don’t think there was anybody outside the walls and doors of this room that believed that we could go down to Death Valley and get it done. But the kids in here believed….

We were so close so many times this year to really get one of those top-25 knockoffs, but we didn’t get it done.”

Like Duke, the Panthers have found themselves in close battles in every game this season other than a 51-28 drubbing at the hands of Miami Nov. 5.

Pittsburgh lost one-score games on the road at Oklahoma State and North See SCOUTING on Page 12

Chronicle File Photo James Conner had 263 yards and three touchdowns on 38 carries when Duke beat Pittsburgh in 2014. The redshirt junior is now back after battling Hodgkin’s lymphoma.

12 | WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 16, 2016

www.dukechronicle.com

The Chronicle

WOMEN’S BASKETBALL

Greenwell scores 1,000th career point as Duke rolls Emily Davis The Chronicle The Blue Devils were calling their top two guards the “Splash Sisters” leading up to the season, comparing them to Golden State’s Stephen Curry and Klay Thompson.

On Tuesday night, Lexie Brown and Rebecca Greenwell showed why.

The duo combined for 34 points in the first half and six 3-pointers as Duke built a 55-19 LONG 48 halftime lead on DUKE 105 its way to a 10548 romp against Longwood Tuesday night at Cameron Indoor Stadium. The Blue Devils had 19 steals in the opening 20 minutes— the most they had in an entire game all of last season was 16—and turned 22 Lancer turnovers into 30 points.

Greenwell was lethal with a careerhigh 30 points on 10-of-20 from the field, and the redshirt junior surpassed

the 1,000-point mark for her career in the second half following her fifth 3-pointer of the game.

“I didn’t know. I knew I was close. I didn’t know the exact number, but then once, at the end of the game, I kind of had an idea because we kept on running all these plays where I was trying to get a three, so I kind of could tell after that,” Greenwell said. “It definitely feels great.

It’s something I’ve always wanted to accomplish and I’m just really thankful to have the opportunity to do it here and get the win as well.”

Brown also finished the game with a dominant scoring performance with 27 points on 9-of-12 shooting and added seven assists.

She began the game with two triples in the first three minutes and punished Longwood’s zone defense when the Lancers were slow to react to Duke’s dangerous shooters.

“My coaches and my teammates always just say shooters just keep shooting. So whether I start 0-for-6 or 6-for-6, I just

Juan Bermudez | The Chronicle Redshirt junior Rebecca Greenwell had a career-high 30 points Tuesday, including five 3-pointers, to eclipse the 1,000-point mark.

SCOUTING from page 11 Carolina as well as at home against thenNo. 25 Virginia Tech, but managed to escape with three-point victories against Penn State and Georgia Tech early in the season.

Although they have been inconsistent, the Panthers’ win at Clemson should give them a major boost as the regular season winds down. Pittsburgh beat Duke 31-13 last season and finishes the regular season against Syracuse.

“We both beat ranked teams and obviously, you come out excited,” Blue Devil head coach David Cutcliffe said. “[Momentum has] got to carry over to the practice field. You don’t carry momentum from a Saturday to a Saturday or a Thursday to a Saturday. You hopefully carry it to Sunday…. You hope you continue that the rest of the week and then you have some momentum.”

Unlike its opponent, however, Pittsburgh brings an experienced lineup into Saturday’s matchup.

The Panthers boast the third-ranked scoring offense in the ACC at 37.6

points per game—behind only No. 3 Louisville and No. 5 Clemson—led by a trio of upperclassmen in redshirt senior quarterback Nathan Peterman, redshirt junior running back James Conner and senior tight end Scott Orndoff.

After missing essentially all of 2015 with a right MCL injury suffered in Pittsburgh’s season opener last year, Conner announced that he had been diagnosed with Hodgkin’s lymphoma last December. The 6-foot-2, 235-pound running back was declared cancer free in May and has more than made good on his promise to return to the football field this fall.

The Panther captain ranks fifth in the conference in rushing and has racked up 12 touchdowns, averaging nearly five yards per carry. Two years ago in Pittsburgh’s double-overtime 51-48 loss to Duke, Conner dominated the Blue Devils for 263 yards and three touchdowns on 38 carries.

The Panthers also have a changeof-pace back in Quadree Henderson, meaning Pittsburgh will provide another test for the Blue Devil defensive front.

“You’ve got to win the battle up

have the same mindset,” Brown said.

The Blue Devils (3-0) were coming off a 68-55 win against Pennsylvania Sunday and got off to an explosive start, opening up a 33-15 lead Tuesday after one quarter thanks to a 16-2 run.

The Duke defense then buckled down in the second quarter, using its fullcourt press to force Longwood’s ball handlers into several miscues that sparked the Blue Devil fastbreak attack.

Duke mixed in various zone presses with their normal man-to-man scheme to frustrate the Lancers all night long.

Longwood (0-2) finished the game with 34 turnovers and shot just 31.7 percent from the field.

“Our defense tonight was really successful due to the leadership of Becca, Lexie and Oderah [Chidom].

The older kids want to be a lot better defensively,” Blue Devil head coach Joanne P. McCallie said. “We wouldn’t normally play that many defenses in a game, but it was good for us to practice them and see where we are and what we

have to improve on.”

With the outcome all but decided early on, the Blue Devils got their other players involved in the offense after halftime. Following a rough outing Sunday, junior Erin Mathias posted a career-high 13 points to go along with six rebounds.

With Greenwell and Brown likely to get the brunt of defensive attention, Duke’s role players will have to step up later in the nonconference schedule when the Blue Devils take on a trio of SEC teams.

“Erin has not only grown in her confidence from this summer but she also is in the best shape of her career.

Physically, she can run longer, she can run harder and she’s a lot stronger,” McCallie said. “Honestly, every player on this team is in the best shape I’ve seen them in.”

Duke will look to keep rolling Thursday against Grand Canyon before hitting the road for a Sunday test at Vanderbilt.

Juan Bermudez | The Chronicle Junior Lexie Brown opened the game by making a few wide open 3-pointers and finished with 27 points on 9-of-12 shooting against a soft Longwood zone defense.

front,” Duke sophomore linebacker Ben Humphreys said. “You’ve got to stop their run, which is tough to do.

They put six, seven linemen in the game, heavy packages and they hand the ball off to [Conner]. And they’ve been doing that since he’s been there.

It’s tough to stop.”

Peterman has been one of the most efficient passers in the conference this year, completing more than 60 percent of his passes and 19 touchdowns against four interceptions.

Last season, the Jacksonville, Fla., native easily handled the Blue Devil secondary to the tune of three touchdown passes, and another solid performance from the Pittsburgh signalcaller could pose serious problems for a banged-up Duke defensive backfield.

The Blue Devils started freshman Mark Gilbert in place of senior Breon Borders against North Carolina.

“You can sit there and say, ‘Stop the run, stop the run,’ which you’ve got to, but they’re very capable of throwing the ball,” Cutcliffe said. “I would think the first thing you’ve got to do when you look at Pitt is [limit] their explosive

plays. You’ve got to align well. They do a lot of shifts and motions—they steal your eyes.”

Despite success on the offensive side of the ball, the Panthers struggle defensively.

Pittsburgh has the ACC’s worst scoring defense—opponents are averaging 35.2 points per game—and it surrenders almost 450 yards per game.

Yet like its offense, the Panther defense is similarly physical and toughminded. Up front, defensive lineman Ejuan Price leads Pittsburgh with nine sacks and three forced fumbles.

Along with fellow lineman Rori Blair, the Panther defensive front could challenge an emerging Duke ground game—one that has tallied more than 225 yards in each of its last three contests sparked by quarterback Daniel Jones.

“We know they’re great at stopping the run,” Blue Devil center Austin Davis said. “Our goal is to move them around and be physical as an offensive front.

They have a great pass rusher, but I have great faith in our tackles that they’re going to be able to block him down when they need to and we’re going to get the job done up front.”

The Chronicle

www.dukechronicle.com

M. BASKETBALL from page 1

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 16, 2016 | 13

JACKSON from page 11

There is still no timetable for freshmen Jayson Tatum, Marques Bolden and Harry Giles to return from lower-leg injuries that have kept them out so far this season.

“He’s going to the point where he makes a move, and it’s a good move, and he’s expecting a foul. I’m not saying they’re not calling fouls— you can’t do that. That can’t be what you’re doing,” Krzyzewski said of Allen. “In the last few minutes, he moved well. He’s playing hard when he gets the ball and he needs to play harder when he doesn’t have the ball—which is what he did in the last few minutes—because people are loaded up for you.”

Duke will now have three days off before traveling back north for the Basketball Hall of Fame Tip-Off in Uncasville, Conn. The Blue Devils will face Penn State Saturday at 12:30 p.m. before tackling either Cincinnati or No. 21 Rhode Island at 1 p.m. Sunday.

of the night in crunch time.

With no timetable on the Blue Devils’ other three five-star freshmen returning scared of making big plays.” to the court, Duke will need more of the After averaging same from Jackson 19.5 points per game as it looks to bounce e plays with a ton of against Marist and back from its first loss Grand Canyon last this weekend against confidence, and that’s weekend and being what we need out of him. He’s Penn State and either named ACC Freshman not scared of making big plays. Cincinnati or No. 21 of the Week, Jackson Rhode Island. faced his first adversity “He played more — Grayson Allen on Frank as a Blue Devil against Jackson like a freshman in the first half, but Kansas.

His team could have folded and lost it’s a pretty big environment against a by double digits. Instead, the 6-foot- great backcourt,” Duke head coach Mike 3 guard went toe to toe with one of Krzyzewski said. “He was very good in the best backcourts in the nation in the second half, and it was just a matter Mason and Devonte’ Graham and even of getting that level of experience. We outplayed them for a very brief stretch have confidence in him.”

Jack White | The Chronicle Sophomore Luke Kennard led Duke with 22 points but could only watch as Mason won it with his game-winner.

The New York Times Syndication Sales Corporation Jack White | The Chronicle 620 Eighth Avenue, New York, N.Y. 10018 Playing without freshmen stars Marques Bolden, Jayson Tatum and Harry Giles, the Blue For Information Call: 1-800-972-3550 Devils struggled at times toWednesday, defend aggressively without fouling.

For For Release Release Tuesday, November November 15, 16,2016 2016

two games, but the Duke perimeter attack really struggled against the Jayhawks’ two AllBig 12 Defensive Team guards in Mason III and junior Devonte’ Graham.

Despite an injury scare late in the first half, Allen returned to start the second half but was largely ineffective— he finished with 12 points on 4-of-15 shooting for a second straight subpar performance in the Champions Classic after making just 2-of-11 shots for six points against Kentucky last season.

Kennard and Jackson stepped up to carry the offense as the veteran Allen was struggling, but with three major weapons still sidelined indefinitely, the Blue Devils will need their preseason All-American to come through with consistent scoring going forward.

Advertise here for C L A S S I Fthe I Ebest D Sresults

Crossword

TRAVEL/VACATION BAHAMAS SPRING BREAK $189 for 5-Days. All prices include: Round-trip luxury party cruise� Accommodations on the island at your choice of ten resorts� Appalachia Travel� www�BahamaSun�com 800-867-5018

H

dukechronicle.com classifieds

The Chronicle TGIF

classified advertising

Recess ~ today! www.dukechronicle.com/classifieds

The Chronicle Sportswrap ~ Our lower-leg injuries: Myriad Bold: ���������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������� today! clairity

Sidewalk got me:�������������������������������������������������������������������������������������theneeldeal Frisbee to the shin: ������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������� bigxie Fell on a rock:�����������������������������������������������������������������������������������������beyerbeware Missed a step at West Union: �����������������������������������������������#amrithisnotimpressed Hit a tree while skiing: ���������������������������������������������������������������������������christytwisty Shin splints: �������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������� brownsugar

Student Advertising Manager: ��������������������������������������������������������������� John Abram Student Marketing Manager: �������������������������������������������������������Beatriz Gorostiaga Account Representatives: ��������������������������������Megan Bowen, Griffin Carter, TJ Cole, Paul Dickinson, Philip Foo, Jack Forlines, Shiv Gidumal, Francis L’Esperance, Leeshy Lichtman, Rachel Louie, Gabriela Martinez-Moure, Jack McGovern, Jake Melnick, David Meyer, Lauren Pederson, Levi Rhoades, Maimuna Yussuf, Matt Zychowski Creative Services: ��������������������������������������������������������Daniel Moore, Myla Swallow Marketing ����������������������������������������������������������Hunter Bracale, Nicolette Sorensen

ACROSS Hawaiian 1 Ladies’ night greeting attendee 6 “It’s Growth on the 7 all good” forest floor 13 Light-colored 10 brew Seller of the Söderhamn sofa 14 Condo building 14 employees Like three NASA rovers 16 Canada’s 15 first “Thisprovince is disastrous!” alphabetically 16 Prepare, Lima’s home 17 as a score 17 musical PowerPoint slide with fake data?

18 Lack of supply 20 Join Hershey bar with 19 toffee 20 Possible 21 response Go to the to mall 22 “Can “Duty,you ___,pick up the kids from Country” (West school?”

Point motto) 24 23 Like FancyBeethoven’s affair Symphony No. 6 25 Pressing 27 What an Ironman business? has to battle 26 Sliced serving 28 Place with ritzy crackers?

31 Mazda roadster 31 “___ Restaurant 33 out walkin’ basketful after midnight” 32 (Patsy Stir-fry Cline vessellyric)

34 33 Boxer Octagonal Ali sign 36 in 10 37 Model Everybody straight Sports 38 Illustrated Rag covered in dirt? swimsuit editions, 42 familiarly Pal of Piglet and Pooh 37 Summer setting Seattle: Abbr.

43 in “Holy moly!”

38 tats the 45 Get Bill ___, Science 39 Big nameGuy in 46 precision Japanese cutting auto import 40 ___ capita 48 Pep squad 41 Asparagus member’s spears, e.g. lament?

42 “___ durn 52 tootin’!”

Cotton fabric

55 67 Land Length created x width, by C. for S. a rectangle Lewis 58 asst.

68 Surgical Innocent’s reply to “Whoon dida 60 Insects this?”

17-year cycle 69 Exciting Store sign 61 romantic 70 prospect Like morning grass defrauding 62 Ones 71 museums From Zurich, e.g.

63 Weaponry storehouse DOWN 64 Vitamin 1 brand “Woe is me”an with name 2 instructive Stand in the shadows 3 Not DOWN fooled by 4 What may keep a 55 Flying circus 43 Luau souvenir 1 High wind mohawk in place performer?

2 Actress Jessica 44 Bottom of bell 5 Dog’s yap 56 bottoms ___ Sam 3 Satyr’s stare 6 Latte alternatives 57 Like Eatery with 45 a zoot-suiter 4 Item in a swag sidewalk tables, 7 bag Lima’s home 47 A Marx brother often 8 Gibson “Oh, ___!”

5 who was 49 Possessive 59 Breckinridge of (“Good the firstone, person often fictioncontaining girlfriend!”) of color to win a mistaken Grand 63 apostrophe Briefs from 9 aFatennis follower Slam event Walmart or 52 Color of the 10 Products Target?

6 Bucolic Dodge Charger featuringlocale Siri 66 on Biggest on of 11 “The city Dukes 7 Journalist Wells “The Family Hazzard” the Big Island Circus” creator 8 Title “Dr.” in an Bil G. Wells story H. ANSWER TO PREVIOUS PUZZLE 12 Goof 9 Southern side made with D O R A S A OJ SA S R EI KT E N A 13 dish A L O H M Cowboy singer kernels off the Gene H AI RT R H A N G O U H RE M LI M U N O PA E U cob V R A M R A R TE 18 Capri or Man A T PI FI RI CE BI A LT C H 10 Spoken test A K N O Y R O N SE H O S PT A HL OL NI O R N 19 Something S P AE LA A S E W B AI N Y E R Y 11 Marriott G a thoughtful competitor person strokes F H A EV E S E D S O O E F AI N T E O A S T C parts O O R O O D W R O A K G O S N TF OL PY 12 R L N L S 24 Last Lead-in fordrawn prof. in or hangman V.P. N LI L N O B O N D AI D Y A O P A T A L O RL O 13 Crib D E EV ZI L N F YI ES H AI SB U A ZT UE 25 Reference page G edited by a cut group A L O TI M O O F U T O W A EC E RS 15 Something F C H R M U S LS AI N S FC H L E A 26 down Steep during rock face March Madness B N E C A LT E N I C K AS F EA P M O YL RL A O 27 Golfer’s target U Go completely A H C AT I N S G UI N A D N ET R S W Q EU AI R D 21 C 28 dotty?

Glamour rival W H R E M O O U T M E ED H HI O L M O A E AI N 22 29 Push It gives oneself a littleto L P O E B N E T E R W E YX N W E EI S D S O D S the hootmax

Edited by Will Shortz 1

2 1

3 2

4 3

5 4

5

14 13 18

20 18

21 23 25 27

26 28

31

46 53

48

21

22

23

29

30 34

45

40

41 46

43

44

59

15

25

32

50

51

55

48 55

58

13

22

38 41

57

12 12

19

37 40

54

11 11

16

14

47 53

10 10

9

39

49

54

89

19

33

44 42

78

17

27

38

39 43

52 56

20 24

32

36 37

45 52

7

15

17 16

24 26

6

1011 No. 1012

56

58 63

64

60

65

61 66

67

62

68

63 69

70

64

71

35 33

28

29

30

34

35

36

49

50

51

60

61

62

42 47

57 59

PUZZLE BY JEFF SAMUEL CHEN A. DONALDSON AND DOUG PETERSON

23 30 Bout Rock’sof___ swellheadedness Fighters

30 44 Flaps Ginormous one’s gums number

34 Where “You make a 24 to see good point” pictures on the screen?muck 35 big Primordial 25 1492 36 Ship Rain of really hard

32 un 47 Spot Cloth for made chapeau famous by infomercials 35 Pay to play

26 39 Pretentiously Unknown source, high-class informally 28 similarly 40 Thinking School about 40 miles from S.L.C. 29 Many a college 41 applicant’s “God does not interviewer, play ___ withforthe short world”: Einstein

46 e.g.

50 Wild Whenthrow, nothing seems tosaltine go 47 Keebler right brand

49 Hullabaloo Appearance 45

51 SometimesEscape (from) 48 caramelized food 52 A ton, in Tijuana 50 Part of Wonder 53 Woman’s Square outfit

51 54 Impertinent Item on many a bathroom floor 53 Like Venus in 57 “The Successfully Birth of treat Venus” 58 Nickname From square 54 forone 60 Mom’s Supposed mom sighting in Tibet 56 A lot of land, 61 maybe Aries animals 62 God who sounds 57 Bit likeof heBollywood was music mentioned in the preceding clue 59 Jellied delicacy 64 Exec. ___ sack 60 money 65 manager E.R. staffers

Online subscriptions: Today’s puzzle and more than 7,000 past puzzles, nytimes.com/crosswords ($39.95 a year).

Read about and comment on each puzzle: nytimes.com/wordplay.

Crosswords for young solvers: nytimes.com/studentcrosswords.

T H E I N D E P E N D E N T D A I LY AT D U K E U N I V E R S I T Y

The Chronicle

“

A nation divided

A

s last Tuesday night wore on into Wednesday morning, liberal Americans were surprised and then blindsided as an overwhelmingly expected lead for Hillary Clinton was eroded and then reversed as the numbers began rolling in for Donald J. Trump. Over the course of this past week, too much of America has gone to look in the mirror to try and find itself after the election, only to realize that it no longer recognizes what it sees.

From the right, what liberals and social progressives saw as forward movement in the areas of universal health care, same-sex marriage, affirmative action and other issues were unconscionable to the country’s conservative base. Key pieces of Democratic legislation and landmark court decisions conflicted with fundamental core values of the Republican Party and often seemed to sweep aside conservative movements in Congress and state legislatures with executive orders and court decisions that were viewed as overreaches.

From the left, self-deception dominated college campuses, most mainstream news organizations and discussions the country over, encouraging unparalleled levels of conceit as

evidenced by how shocking the election’s results were to pollsters and Democratic voters. To our country’s liberal base, and particularly to college-age liberals, the issues that were most pressing seemed like foregone conclusions. It seemed as if the American right, particularly with the development of the alt-right, was ignorant at best and backwards at worst when it came to the things that “mattered.”

Self-exile to respective political echo chambers

Editorial

was part of the failure of the left in this election.

In its conceit in the last several years that because it had won the “culture war” by integrating social progressivism into its platform, it had a gained a right to righteousness in all other matters, many liberals grew out of touch with the same voters and large swathes of America that would prove essential to success in this election.

And so without denying the importance to each side of their respective platforms and agendas, this election revealed a yawning gap between parties. In many ways, that separation

onlinecomment Knowing Duke’s culture, everything Professor Anomaly says will be invalidated by the fact that he’s a cis-hetero privileged white male + whatever progressive pc-culture label term is trending. Students are too quick to invalidate people’s opinions based on their identity alone.

— “Transitman,” responding to “We’re all gonna die, but not yet,” published November 14, 2016

J

Direct submissions to:

The Chronicle welcomes submissions in the form of letters to the editor or guest columns. Submissions must include the author’s name, signature, department or class, and for purposes of identification, phone number and local address.

Letters should not exceed 325 words; contact the editorial department for information regarding guest columns.

The Chronicle will not publish anonymous or form letters or letters that are promotional in nature. The Chronicle reserves the right to edit letters and guest columns for length, clarity and style and the right to withhold letters based on the discretion of the editorial page editor.

E-mail: chronicleletters@duke.edu Editorial Page Department The Chronicle Box 90858, Durham, NC 27708 Phone: (919) 684-2663 Fax: (919) 684-4696

The Chronicle

Inc. 1993

comes from a lack of experiential diversity. The average student at Duke for example has no idea what “flyover country” is or what it is like to live in the Ruse Belt and have experienced the political, social and economic histories therein.

Similarly, many conservatives who balk at the idea of same-sex marriage or the thought of affirmative action have never really felt for the personal stories of those whose lives have been changed dramatically and uplifted by decisions and policies in favor of both.

There are fault lines of disconnect like these all over our country’s political landscape, and if this election is not a wake-up call to seek them out and understand not only the issues at hand but the stories of those who are trying to come to the table, then our democracy will continue to be incomplete or, at best, dissatisfying.

Whatever your position in life or political posture, consider where you stand after this election and how your approach to your country could improve, because if you think you are right or have found the elusive solution to government, you had best think again.

This is the third and final editorial in a three-part arc about the presidential election and its aftermath.

The meme manifesto

ust a few months ago, an article about how a group called the alt-right is waging a war of memes on the internet would have been completely nonsensical. But today, it’s become clear that the center-left, and moderates in general, are losing the fight for the very soul of the internet.

In light of President-elect Donald Trump’s recent victory, it would be a good idea to take a step back and consider the factors that allowed for his rise in the primaries and the general election. While the “altright” surely did not compose the majority of Trump’s “coalition,” they made up a small but vocal chunk of his base that offered zealous support as he secured the nomination and the presidency. So, that being said, on to the alt-right and the great meme war.

The alt-right is a “segment of right-wing ideologies that reject mainstream conservatism” in American politics. They found their origins deep in the web, on shady and anonymous message boards (remember the hacker 4chan?) that let you say

” edit pages

LETTERS POLICY

Est. 1905

The Chronicle

www.dukechronicle.com commentary

14 | WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 16, 2016

Unfortunately, many memes (and a fair bit of internet culture) have been hijacked to promote the bankrupt ideologies of racism, bigotry, and intolerance—all things that the internet was hoped to combat through the free exchange of ideas and debate.

How did this happen? Message board users on sites such as 4chan and reddit regularly utilized memes to channel racist, sexist, homophobic, or other-ist tendencies. Pepe the Frog is the poster-amphibian for this phenomenon—the situation became so desperate that the Anti-Defamation League actually labeled the meme as a hate symbol in certain circumstances.

One tragedy of this unfortunate descent into deplorability is that Pepe was never meant to be a symbol of hate. The creator of the character, Matt Furie, threw his support behind Secretary Clinton, and rejected the alt-right’s use of his beloved frog. Something good, an innocent meme, was hijacked by the shadowy powers that lurk in the dark corners of the internet.

But it doesn’t need to be this way. Memes can be for good, not for evil. Every time you choose to

David Wohlever Sanchez SIMPLE COMPLEXITY

CLAIRE BALLENTINE, Editor AMRITH RAMKUMAR, Sports Editor ABBY XIE, News Editor NEELESH MOORTHY, Managing Editor ADAM BEYER, Digital Content Director HAN KANG, Photography Editor JACKSON PRINCE, Editorial Page Editor SAMANTHA NEAL, Senior News Reporter SURABHI BERIWAL, Editorial Board Chair ASA ROYAL, Editorial Board Chair

CHRISSY BECK, General Manager FRANCES BEROSET, University News Department Head

KENRICK CAI, Local & National News Head

LIKHITHA BUTCHIREDDYGARI, Local & National News Head

VIR PATEL, Health & Science News Head

JIM LIU, News Photography Editor

IAN JAFFE, Sports Photography Editor

DILLON FERNANDO, Recess Editor

CHRISTY KUESEL, Recess Managing Editor

AUSTIN PEER, Recess Photography Editor SAM TURKEN Sports Managing Editor CAROLYN SUN, Graphic Design Editor RACHEL CHASON, Towerview Editor RACHEL CHASON, Recruitment Chair SARAH KERMAN, Senior News Reporter MEGAN HAVEN, Advertising Director

SAMEER PANDHARE, Sports Managing Editor ADDISON MERRYMAN, Editorial Page Managing Editor GAUTAM HATHI, Towerview Editor CAROLYN CHANG, Towerview Photography Editor AMRITH RAMKUMAR, Recruitment Chair HEATHER ZHOU, Senior News Reporter MARY WEAVER, Business Manager JULIE MOORE, Creative Director

The Chronicle is published by the Duke Student Publishing Company, Inc., a non-profit corporation independent of Duke University. The opinions expressed in this newspaper are not necessarily those of Duke University, its students, faculty, staff, administration or trustees. Unsigned editorials represent the majority view of the editorial board. Columns, letters and cartoons represent the views of the authors.

To reach the Editorial Office at 301 Flowers Building, call 684-2663 or fax 684-4696. To reach the Business Office at 1517 Hull Avenue call 684-3811. To reach the Advertising Office at 2022 Campus Drive call 684-3811.

One copy per person; additional copies may be purchased for .25 at The Chronicle Business office at the address above. @ 2016 Duke Student Publishing Company

anything for all to see but none to attribute.

Memes, as they are understood in internet culture, are difficult to define—basically, you know them when you see them. They’re generally familiar, oft-used images with some sort of caption that is meant to be humorous (though not always). Memes are about as diverse as they can be hilarious—check out this definitive meme database if you really want to get into it.

A meme in the classic sense, however, is “an idea, behavior, or style that spreads from person to person within a culture.” And in the case of the alt-right, these two definitions merge in a strange way. By combining strong subculture ideas with consistent images, the alt-right has weaponized memes to serve their agenda and build community cohesiveness.

Memes have become a powerful force on social media and other internet forums. It’s hard to explain them to someone who doesn’t understand them, but a single meme can contain so much meaning. A combination of the context, caption, image, and forum can contain paragraphs of meaning—all in a concise, captioned image.

This makes memes a powerful means of communication—I myself have had online conversations consisting solely of memes and gifs.

Memes, then, have become staples of communities, binding them together across time and space. Friends have inside jokes attached to specific memes. Online communities have favorite memes that are posted and reposted time and time again.

share a meme with a friend in a way that adds to our social utility, rather than detracting from it, you strike a blow in the Great Meme War against the strongholds of hate and intolerance.

I call for a reimagination of internet culture, a true meme revolution: the right, center-right, moderates, center-left and left must rise up and seize the memes of production in a glorious battle for the very soul of the internet. It is within our grasp to reclaim memes for good, and not for evil.

Say hello to doge, and bonjour to Kermit. Reject neo-nazi green frogs in favor of comical cat gifs.

Spread the messages of love and acceptance and humor through your memes, leaving behind the chains of bigotry, discrimination, and mockery.

Make the memes great again.

In the future, we will likely look back on the 2016 election as a turning point in the relationship between real-life politics and virtual memes—they surely impacted us in ways we do not yet understand.

For in the 21st century, wars of ideas are fought on the internet, on those anonymous message boards, where the hearts and minds of the people find home and where Pepe the Frog finds a host.

So, global users of the internet unite! We have nothing to lose but our frogs.

David Wohlever Sánchez is a Trinity sophomore. His column, “simple complexity,” runs on alternate Wednesdays.

The Chronicle

I

www.dukechronicle.com commentary

But is it better than Obamacare?

should start by readily acknowledging the fact that I am not an expert in the policy or politics of the American healthcare system. But as a college student with a lifelong history of heart disease—I’ve got the pacemaker and everything—it’s a subject that I don’t take lightly, especially as I near the day when I’ll venture into the job pool and out of my eligibility for dependent coverage on my parents’ health insurance.

Under the Affordable Care Act, insurance carriers that provide for dependent coverage are required to continue doing so until said dependent reaches 26 years of age. A White House fact sheet on this particular aspect of the Affordable Care Act wastes no

Jake Parker

needs—the sickest Americans end up the most burdened. And of course, there are the matters of decreased willingness among insurance companies to participate—Aetna and UnitedHealth Group both recently announced drastic plans to pull out of certain Affordable Care Act marketplaces, citing lost profits—and the detrimental lack of buy-in among young people.

These might’ve been a few of the hitches Trump was considering when he made those sweeping condemnations, but here’s the bottom line: Because of the Affordable Care Act, an estimated 20 million people have gained access to health insurance, through Medicaid expansion, the federal marketplace, state insurance exchanges and

THINKING TOO MUCH, FEELING TOO LITTLE

time in pointing out that because of the guarantee on extended dependent coverage, “Many parents and their children who worried about losing health insurance after they graduated from college no longer have to.”

I was aware of this worry from an exceptionally young age, conscious of the fact that my operations and check-ups weren’t paying for themselves. And of course, I worried how I would foot the bill once my parents were no longer around. My aspirations were framed by an awareness of the fact that financial stability pays for medications and new pacemakers—and that being a starving artist was out of the question.

The Affordable Care Act is a giant step forward towards the provision of healthcare for every American—not just those of us born healthy or with the means to pay for top-notch treatment. It’s a step propelled by expanded coverage for unemployed college grads, reforms that prohibit insurance companies from denying coverage to those with preexisting conditions, and, in the individual and small group market, regulations that protect people from being charged higher rates based on gender or health status. These are a few parts of a law that levels the playing field on the American right to preservation of life—admittedly, Thomas Jefferson might disagree with my interpretation there, but that’s beside the point.

It’s not lost on me that the above paragraph is also a rundown of the Affordable Care Act’s greatest hits. To those fresh off following the campaign trail— however reluctantly—the characterization might even be jarring after a season of Obamacare bashing—President-elect Donald Trump called the law a “horror” on more than one occasion. And of course, the concerns—articulated more clearly by people who aren’t reality television stars— are very real.

Late last month, the Obama administration released prices for many of the health plans under the Affordable Care Act, revealing sizable increases for many segments of the country. According to the most recent federal estimates, the average mid-level plan will cost around 22 percent more in 2017 than it did in 2016. Though, it should also be noted that 80 percent of Obamacare customers receive subsidies to help with the price of premiums and will thus not feel the full burden of price increases— that is if they’re willing and able to switch to a less expensive plan in their market. The rub becomes clear when we consider that changing hospital or doctor to start anew isn’t easy for people with complex health

“H

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 16, 2016 | 15

The cool airs of November

ONK HONK!” The Robertson Express has arrived. Contact between Duke and UNC, tenuous at best under President Brodhead, has now been completely cut for months.

Only the bus between the two remains, more useless now than ever, seeing as the Robertson Scholars defected long ago in an unsurprisingly public manner. While some students venture onto the Robbie from time to time, none have returned. Most believed that the Carolina-Blue Walkers were forever changed after their embarrassing loss to Villanova in 2016. However, rumors from Yik Yak’s two remaining users report that the Carolina-Blue Walkers of UNC have risen once again.

The Pledgemaesters

and to her consulting firm applications, then delivers a PASH-ionate victory speech to the 15 students who have gathered in front of the Chapel to hear her.

“For too long, Pratt students have felt excluded from student life here at Duke! That is why, today, I have signed a resolution which will outlaw the TrinityPratt gap forever. Everyone will be friends! We begin our offensive in five minutes.” With the proclamation, war arrives on West Campus.

The engineers rally around the Chief Engineer of Engineering Student Government, who began ordering the construction of defensive fortifications around E-quad. DSG, as is tradition,

A SONG OF NATTY ICE AND FIREBALL

yes, expanded dependent coverage.

That net result isn’t a pyrrhic victory. It’s worth every bit of the dysfunction.

Recently, Trump’s been softening on parts of the Affordable Care Act. First, he told The Wall Street Journal he was reconsidering his long-touted (and yelled) stance on the law. Then in an interview for “60 Minutes” he voiced his intention to continue the Affordable Care Act’s guarantee of coverage for people with pre-existing conditions and extended dependent coverage, saying of the latter, it’s “very much something we’re going to try to keep.”

He still appears set on following his campaign trail mantra of “repeal and replace,” but what exactly would do the replacing is unclear. In that “60 Minutes” interview he only described his shadowy plan as “great health care for much less money.”

The uncertainty is certainly worrying—then again Ben Carson’s going to help, so what could go wrong?

Meanwhile, Trump seems to have quickly warmed up to at least a few members of the Republican establishment—I’m looking at you, Reince Priebus—and if his healthcare plan starts looking like those floated by the likes of House Speaker Paul Ryan, we could be in some major trouble.

The plan released by Ryan in June—which would make a tax-credit available to those buying insurance plans in state-regulated markets—admittedly can’t be done justice in this limited space. But here’s a rundown of a couple potential issues. The plan would tear down strong coverage requirements, eliminating insurance companies’ incentive to offer plans appealing to people who are, or might become, sick; the sale of insurance across state lines would mean that the state with flimsiest regulations would set the national standard; and protections for people with preexisting conditions would only apply to those with continuing health care coverage.

I worry about the worst case scenario, in which people made hopeful by improved access to healthcare are forced to go uninsured, dependent on the local emergency room for medical treatment.

If the Trump administration can provide those benefits better, great. But enough with the vague hyperbole; tell me how. And, in the meantime, let’s hope for once that Trump creates something as “great” as he says it is.

Wake Forest has inexplicably gone dark. The Chronicle reports that a massive contingent of UNC students had been seen marching into WinstonSalem last Tuesday from 8 a.m. to 5 p.m., their free time. Nobody knows where the Carolina-Blue walkers are going now, though some have suggested that their original target was Duke and that they simply went the wrong way.

Meanwhile, on East Campus, the RAs and RCs assert their dominance; the First-Yearlings relent to the wisdom and seniority of their superiors. Sir Guarcamole finally wins an election. His impassioned speech to the RAs and RCs make them all realize he was the only one who actually cared at all to hold the title of Keeper of the East. However, his optimistic vision of integrating and civilizing the First-Years begins to prove unsettling to a small but growing faction of RAs who wish to merely extort marketplace swipes and shut down parties (for East is a dry realm after all).

On Central Campus, SigUp and the Pikes act menacingly towards one another.

Although SigUp has a superior strategic location (near Dame’s, the Central pool, and the bus stop), the Pikes grow stronger every day. SigUp decides at to consult The Chronicle, Duke’s most accurate, best and humblest source of information. The president of SigUp submits a question to The Chronicle’s independent editorial board via Google Forms: “What will happen if we attack the Pikes?”

Within the hour, The Chronicle reports, “If SigUp attacks the Pikes of Central Campus, a middle-tier fraternity will fall.”

Spurred by this news, SigUp launches its impromptu invasion. Unfortunately, the attack was doomed to fail. Had they checked with their middle-tier and meteorology-expert allies, Pikapp of West Campus (because that’s where Pikapp lives, definitely), SigUp would have known that a torrential downpour was on the way.

Central’s landscape turns to mud, and the SigUp assault quickly becomes deadlier than the Charge of the Light Brigade.

The Chronicle reports that a middle-tier fraternity is destroyed that day, but it is not the Pikes of Central Campus.

On West, the DSG election ends in a resounding victory for Queen Ban-all and her cohorts. The Queen is reelected with 105 percent of all votes cast in her favor. More surprising was the record high turnout of 8 percent, which easily eclipsed Duke’s 2016 U.S. presidential election turnout. Ban-all proudly adds the accomplishment to her LinkedIn profile

edit pages

Jake Parker is a Trinity sophomore. His column, “thinking too much, feeling too little,” runs on alternate Wednesdays.

completely underestimated the task which lay before it. Problem sets, endless labs, incomprehensible professors, massive and unfeeling lectures and multiple academic defeats have trained the engineers to be a race much like the machines they meticulously craft, devoid of emotion and mercy.

From their great stronghold in CIEMAS, the engineers hold the line. Like Greek fire, the super-weapons which ESG creates are extremely effective but also shrouded in mystery. Non-disclosure agreements signed between the engineers and their future employers ensure the technology will not enter the public eye for years. All that is known is that many P-Frosh mercenaries are lost for very little gain. Caffeine from the recently acquired Vondy is all that keeps the DSG forces moving. The DSG Exec Board attempts to make progress by reaching out to the student body for ideas.

Like Zagster, this DSG operation thus far appears to be floundering. Stalemate sets in on West Campus’ eastern front.

In their latest email blast, Queen Ban-all and the Weis-man offer a $10,000 reward from the DSG surplus to anyone who can pitch-a-project which will succeed in crushing the Pratt Stars. However, nobody has submitted any suggestions. In fact, as is tradition, no one even reads the email. As the cold sets in, the P-Frosh camp out in tents on the Main Quad. They burn thousands of unused and unwanted (but free!) copies of The Chanticleer for heat. Tragically, their only nourishment comes from vending machines. While West Union existed prior to the Fall of Trask, it was soon after razed to the ground by disgruntled Loop employees and stakeholders who desired to remove the competition once and for all.

While the cool air did not cool tempers at Duke, it did remind some of the upcoming basketball season. In an act of revenge for the infamous Duke-Miami game of 2016, the Duke Men’s Basketball team ravages the University of Miami and annexes its measly endowment. Then, once more, the team vanishes. Presumably, the Giants and their intrepid commander move north. Brodhead have mercy on those who try to block, dunk, travel or stand in their way!

The Pledgemaesters acknowledge that in the middle of relating this portion of the tale, a “Not My President” rally briefly interrupted their train of thought. This left them wondering why Duke students protested even though Brodhead’s replacement has yet to be named. The Pledgemaesters don’t read the news much.

16 | WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 16, 2016

www.dukechronicle.com

The Chronicle

DUKE UNIVERSITY:

STAY TRUE TO YOUR CLIMATE PROMISES! Duke University has proposed to allow Duke Energy to build, own, and operate a brand-new, $55 million, 21 megawatt natural gas power plant on campus, slated to begin operation as early as September 2018.

A LONG TERM INVESTMENT IN FOSSIL FUEL

- The plant would operate for at least 35 years, according to the legal filing by Duke Energy - University claims of an 18% reduction in campus carbon emissions only considers reductions in natural gas burned by Duke University-owned steam plants and do not account for any of the emissions from the proposed power plant itself - Calculations by Nicholas School faculty and community groups show the purported climate benefits of the plant to be vastly exaggerated, increasing the amount of natural gas burned on campus by 61% and potentially increasing net carbon emissions by more than 30% - Natural gas production results in significant leaks of methane, a greenhouse gas 86 times more potent than CO2 over twenty years - A future transition to biogas is highly unlikely given the prohibitive cost of biogas pipeline infrastructure and the failure of Duke Energy to meet existing state biogas production targets

A FAILURE OF TRANSPARENCY

- Students, faculty, and staff were not informed about the plant before it was publicly announced 6 months ago, after it had been negotiated for a year under a non-disclosure agreement - The Graduate and Professional Student Council passed a resolution in October urging greater transparency on the power plant. The administration has yet to formally respond to this request - To date, there has been no formal process for review or input on the plant

Duke University has made a name for itself as an environmental and climate leader, but the proposed fossil fuel expansion jeopardizes Duke’s climate legacy. Duke University should reject this fossil fuel plant and lead the way to clean, renewable energy in the Southeast.

MAKE YOUR VOICE HEARD:

- Request that the North Carolina Utilities Commission host a public hearing on Duke University’s campus about the proposed plant: bit.ly/dukepublichearing - Sign our petition asking President Brodhead to end this proposed plant: bit.ly/nonewgas

- Learn more and receive updates: bit.ly/dukeclimate

Paid for by Foundation Earth