What You Need to Know About Pets and Cannabis

art entertainment food drink music nightlife Thursday, April 13, 2017

DGO

FREE!

WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT

PETS AND CANNABIS It can ease maladies such as pain and anxiety, but if not used properly, could hurt more than help

Also: Profanity justified?, London Souls, what’s coming at Carver’s, “Elevated Discourse”: A new marijuana column, and Stephen Sellers dances in Cuba

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DGO Magazine

STAFF

What’s inside Volume 2 Number 25

April 13, 2017

Chief Executive Officer

10 Coming to Carver’s

Douglas Bennett

Robert Alan Wendeborn called up Patrick Jose, head brewer at Carver Brewing Co., to fill him in on all the hot new gossip, and talk about all things beer.

V.P. of Finance and Operations Bob Ganley V.P. of Advertising David Habrat V.P. of Marketing Founding Editors Amy Maestas

17 ‘Elevated Discourse’:

A new weed column

David Holub Editor/ creative director David Holub dholub@bcimedia.com 375-4551 Patty Templeton

Meggie J/Special to DGO

»» Titanium nail (top right) and quartz nails for a dab rig.

ptempleton@bcimedia.com Contributors Katie Cahill Katie Clancy

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Christopher Gallagher

Time to emerge from the darkness, unblock our joy Spring means a return to relative sanity, thanks to a few Buddhist teachers; the longer the days, the more distance I make from those dark nights of the soul that were part of my disconnected winter.

Alexi Grojean Meggie J Bryant Liggett Jon E. Lynch Heather Narwid Cooper Stapleton Cyle Talley

Area writer Meggie J begins a new column called “Elevated Discourse,” which will focus on sensible marijuana education, reviews, how-to’s, and issues facing recreational and medicinal cannabis users.

247-3504 Reader Services 375-4570

DGO is a free weekly publication distributed by Ballantine Communications Inc., and is available for one copy per person. Taking more than five copies of an edition from a distribution location is illegal and is punishable by law according to Colorado Revised Statute 18-9-314.

4

Love it or Hate it

5

Vintage Durango

8

Sound

7

Rock ’n’ roll done right We talk to Tash Neal of soul duo London Souls about their tour, their to-be-released-sometime-in-2017 album, and what the ghost of Sam Cooke would think of them.

Tell us what you think!

Got something on your mind? Have a joke or a story idea or just something that the world needs to know?

Send everything to editor@dgomag.com

8

Album Reviews 9 10 Beer 16 Weed

Seeing Through 16 the Smoke

Elevated Discourse

17

18 Savage Love 19 Happening 20 DGO Deals 22 Horoscope/ puzzles

23 First Person Durango everyman Stephen Sellers discusses his recent trip to Cuba, dancing with locals, and the value of unplugging.

Robert Alan Wendeborn Advertising

From the Editor

Downtown Lowdown

Kricket Lewis

Staff writer

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/dgomag

22 Pages 23 First Person

/dgomag @dgo_mag

ON THE COVER After an exhaustive, threemonth search of Durango for a cat with piercing green eyes, we finally just used Photoshop. :-/ Illustration by David Holub/DGO; image via Adobe Stock

DGO Magazine is published by Ballantine Communications Inc., P.O. Drawer A, Durango, CO 81302

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@dg

dg

[CTRL-A]

[ love it or hate it ]

David Holub |DGO editor

Profanity can offend, but it also can be a tool for insight, understanding

A

pparently some people out there really care about profanity.

I had a short story (meaning fiction, as you know) published recently in “Zumag: Life in Montezuma County.” The story, called “A Bird in a Church,” is about a guy who finds himself at a wedding where a warbler is trapped, flying about the sanctuary, disrupting the ceremony, buzzing the crowd, harassing the minister, stealing the ceremony. I’d written the story a number of years ago (and last year, adapted it into my one-man show, “We Are Broken and We Are Whole”) as an expression of my time of feeling trapped in a marriage, desperately seeking a way out.

And yes, I used profanity. To spare the sensitive out there, I twice used a word that begins with “S” (once preceded by the word “horse”), one that starts with a “D,” one an “H,” and (gasp!) one that starts with “F.” The two angry letters I received went straight for the profanity. One anonymous letter writer said, “How can you print something like this – a story about a little bird that’s lost its way and you use such profanity – that could have been a sweet story of a beautiful wedding and a special love Bird. You are disgusting David Holub – whoever you are –” (apparently profanity is verboten, but insulting someone directly by name is cool).

The other letter – signed at least – discusses how he assumed initially that the story “would be cute, maybe funny or inspirational. I became a bit uneasy after reading on for a few paragraphs and disgusted as I read on.” He went on about the “use of words that are not fitting any publication” and how “if that story was ‘adapted’ as is stated on page 32, why did you not ‘adapt out’ those impolite, unnecessary and uncivil words?”

The discussion here is not that these people took offense to my story – that’s their right to live in such a fragile world. As a writer and artist, I have two strong beliefs: (1) The worst response one can receive is indifference, and (2) When I dedicated myself to writing seriously, I vowed to never censor myself.

Rather, my curiosity is to the aversion to profanity itself. And these people are the absolute least of my profanity concerns, as I have battled a much larger profanity patroller, one I care infinitesimally more about: my mom, who laughingly says she sometimes has to read DGO with a black marker, to eliminate choice words from her reading experience. She’ll likely be mortified

reading this. I get it.

But I will argue that there is absolutely a time and place for profanity, in literature especially.

I think about a conversation I had with my mom. I once founded and edited a journal of literary humor, called “Kugelmass.” In the first issue, I somehow attained an essay titled “Sensei” written by Simon Rich, who wrote for “The New Yorker,” and went on to write at “Saturday Night Live.” “Sensei” was a true story from his childhood, about a karate class he went to in Brooklyn, taught by a guy with the how-perfectname Ethan. Ethan had shown up to class one day having been beaten up by crack-using street punks. He wanted to explain to his class of children why he didn’t use karate in his fight, how it’s actually a worthless skill, and how no one fights using the “Rules of Combat,” and how all the kids in his class were not there to learn karate, but sent by their parents to lose weight.

“I’m a fraud, kids. A total fraud,” Ethan said.

He admitted he had not grown up in Tokyo and “Hyundai” was not the Japanese word for “Eight.”

The essay was a coming-of-age tale about a grown-up broken and courageous enough to see himself after the incident as peers to these kids, admitting he did not, in fact, have all the answers.

The kids end up forgiving him. He’d taught them curse words, told them the plots of dirty movies. That day he’d introduced them to the words “crack cocaine.” “So what if he wasn’t from Tokyo,” Simon had thought.

They ask him to tell them more about crack cocaine, and he obliges, saying, “Why the fuck not?”

That was what my mom had zeroed in on.

“Why did he have to use that word?” she asked me.

I told her why he had to use that word. Because he was speaking to his students as if they were on his same level. That’s how he talked to his friends, and why not them? Simon Rich’s inclusion of that word was not only intentional, but necessary. We understood the place Ethan was in, all in one word.

So yes. I need not say anything more about my story or its use of profanity. Only that the story I wrote came from a particular place, from a particular character’s point of view at a particular time. And that character sure as fuck meant every word he said.

Small talk Love it

Connecting to others is central to well-being. It ain’t always easy. I know that my first instinct when I walk into a crowded space, like an art opening or rock show, is to back against a wall and blend. Though solitary moments are a joy, a solitary life – for me – isn’t. This means that I have to battle shyness and the way I do that is with small talk.

I love small talk. It doesn’t have to be “So. Um. We have weather.” But even if you say, “Wow. What a blue sky,” you never know where that statement will lead.

Maybe they’ll respond, “Yeah. Almost as pretty as the sky I saw my first day outta prison.” Which, yes, I want to hear the rest of that story. Or you say, “Hey! Nice Tom Waits shirt,” to a lady and, holy crap, she tells you about seeing him on the Rain Dogs tour.

I’m not saying every situation of small talk will be fulla razzmatazz. I’m saying the benefits of trying outweigh not. Not only can you kill time and possibly meet someone interesting, researchers have proved that friendly social interaction can bolster problem-solving skills and better your mood.

So, “How about them Bears?”

—— Patty Templeton

Hate it This happens too often: I see a person I know mildly and they say something like, “So ... how are ... things?”

And all I can think is, “Are we really doing this?” and try to gauge if either of us actually cares what comes out of either mouth.

And the question could be, “So, how’s work?” or “So, crazy weather lately, eh?” or “How ’bout that (sports game/cable show/car commercial)?” Whatever these small-talk-inducing questions are, their intent is to idly pass time discussing things that mean very little in the moment.

Can we all agree that our time should be better spent? Shouldn’t we discard comfort, eliminate social niceties, and go after the stuff that actually matters, the stuff that makes us, the stuff that will actually allow us to connect with one another in a meaningful, lasting way: Our fears, our dreams, our regrets, our triumphs, our proudest moments, our ambitions? I would love to hear about and share those things. Coming from a real place to a listening ear will only bond us.

Next time, let’s jump straight in to something grand.

—— David Holub

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[Vintage Durango]

WOWEE! Staring at women Apparently, The Durango Herald used to run hard-nipped pics of women – because, I mean, it’s the women’s page. What else do you put on that page? Pictures of ladies, right? Women are interested in women, yeah?

Except that the intention of this photo was straight up male gaze.

You have a dude staring directly at an exotic dancer’s chest saying, “WOWEE!” He’s not shamed for his actions, he’s praised by being put in the paper as some kind of flesh pioneer – the discoverer of natural wonders.

»» Candid photo of Princess Tanya in the March 6, 1967, Durango Herald.

Here’s the thing, fella: Princess Tanya may be an exotic dancer in a local club, but she is off the clock. So quit your gawking and go back to your

dominoes. Some might say, “Well, if she doesn’t want to be looked at, she should put a bra on.” I can guarandang-tee that Princess Tanya got unwanted attention no matter what she was wearing, so shut up about the bra. Don’t blame a woman for a man not able to control himself.

Also, the “Women’s Page?” Seriously? Women have a nice little section dedicated to their pretty little heads?

Because why would women be interested in the whole paper – you know, local and world news – when they could read about food prices, men liking breasts, and how to make bacon and cheese popcorn? #1960sFail —— Patty Templeton DGO Staff Writer

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[wellness]

GravityBrain | Katie Clancy

Spring is time to unblock our joy and

EMERGE FROM THE DARKNESS

S

pring is here, which means river runoff, wind-whipped whiskers, and runts rooting in the mud. It also means a return to relative sanity, thanks to a few Buddhist teachers; the longer the days, the more distance I make from those dark nights of the soul that were part of my disconnected winter.

Our bodies are, essentially, solar powered.

From a physics point of view, the sun is our engine source – without it, we are no stronger than frozen plants in a lifeless vacuum. It’s not a coincidence, either, how photosynthesis – light – is understood by many religions as the source of healing and harmony. Electric Jesus, anyone?

Now that the Almighty Light has returned to our hometown, maybe now I can forget the dream, the one where I am lost in the desert.

There is not one tree to embrace and I have no feet, so the wind flips me through the desolate winter night and I tumble past skeletal sagebrush and snowdrift. I have no home that holds me in and I cannot stop for fear of wind’s motion.

“What’s right about blocking your joy?”

Katherine Barr prompted us once during a meditation workshop at the Durango Dharma Center. A longtime Buddhist practitioner and council member to the DDC, Barr is a major inspiration to me. I sought out the workshop because of its theme: The Buddha’s Four Virtues: Loving-Kindness, Compassion, Joy, and Equanimity – all of the qualities I easily forget when the sun abandons this sky, the ground freezes, and I lock myself inside to wallow in my own self-inflicted misery.

I’ll tell you what’s right about blocking my f’ing joy. We have defense mechanisms for a reason – to defend us. Blocking my “joy” allows me to stay small and skirt true responsibility for my life. I can stay tired. I can keep complaining, stay powerless, and avoid the grief that bubbles in the black holes within my body. Blocking my joy let’s me say, “I told you so,” and allow the victim to be avenged and my ego can once again be proved right. I can hurl my problems at you with a burning bucket and splash the blame at your face.

Besides, I’m good at staying busy and distracted.

We go with what we’re good at, right?

In the dreamscape, my body collapses at the edge

times. She teaches what we fear to be true: that there is no real escape from suffering.

And: we can be gentle with ourselves about it all. She is a staunch advocate of becoming true friends with ourselves by showing up to whatever we are experiencing in the present moment with kindness.

Embrace those shameful, ugly craters within myself ? How can I be my own friend when I am constantly making myself the enemy and getting lost in the wrong desert?

Chodron offers practical support, summed up in the acronym, FEAR. It breaks down to: F: Find the place in your body where you are experiencing discomfort (that’s the easy part).

E: Embrace it with your whole heart (much harder).

A: Allow the stories around the feeling to dissolve.

R: Remember with compassion all the other humans who are experiencing this emotion like you are.

Here’s the hook for me that Chodron sums up so perfectly: The intention to strengthen and develop unconditional friendship with yourself heightens your awareness of your unfriendliness until you don’t want be that way anymore.

But practicing FEAR gives me a playful pathway through the darkness into the light of this new season.

How the dream ended: The sun rises over the red dirt and warms my blood. I thaw out. I am hungry, I am curious. Gone is the desperation to escape this foreign land. I take off my skin, and settle into the sand. I unclench my fists and feel for the bottom with my breath.

Then, something unexpected happens. Water begins seeping from the ground. Clean water soaks my body. Immediate relief rushes my David Holub/DGO system. I am quenched. of nowhere. I cannot see in, around, or beyond Maybe my teachers are right, and there’s nothing where I have fallen. Loneliness and terror swell like right about blocking your joy, maybe my defenses pregnant thunderclouds. I want to run from these are finally eroding. I’m not sure ... uncomfortable, terrible feelings, but fear freezes me.

But, at least, it’s getting easier for me to say that.

If only I had remembered the Buddhist nun Pema Chodron in my sleep state; it wasn’t until Katie Clancy is the co-owner of Studio Soma, a therlater that I returned to her wisdom about sufapeutic movement and bodywork sanctuary located in Durango. She is also a freelance writer and dances with fering. Author of “When Things Fall Apart,” 20Moons Dance Theatre.​ Chodron has been a true comfort for me in dark

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[sound]

An interview with the London Souls:

ROCK ’N’ ROLL DONE RIGHT

»» Soul duo

brings the grit and the groove to the Animas City Theatre this week

The London Souls play road trip music. The sun is shining. The windows are down. It’s you and a sexyass hitchhiker and the wide-open world. Everything is possible. Oddly enough, the London Souls could also soundtrack the sweaty, backseat, desert car sex you have when the stars shine over your naked hearts. Furthermore, they play a sweet songs good for eyeballing the one you skin-slipped with over pancakes the next morning.

Y’all have been touring two years straight on “Here Come the Girls,” how do you stay human being on the road that long?

For us, we have to play the same songs but we never do the same set twice because we rarely play the same songs the same way. We try to keep it fresh. That is one thing we took from bands like the Grateful Dead or Cream or any bands that are improvisational like The Who. We wanted short songs – two, three, maybe four minutes. If we can put some improv in there and put our expression in, then you’re never doing the same thing twice.

Working on a new album?

Our first tracking session was in 2014, but that was only for three songs. We did the majority of it in 2016. About 14 songs, and now we’ve got six songs that we did in two separate sessions this year. So we have a new album, we’re just trying to figure out the best way to put out all the material so that it gets the eyes that it deserves.

Is the new album going to bring any new genre twists or the unexpected?

A lot of this album, the material was based conceptually on my being in a major car accident, the coma, coming out of the coma, the concepts of life and death, that idea of

What I’m saying is that the London Souls play a ridiculous range of music and all of it is good. And most of it will make you want to dance. Or have sex. Or both. You can hear it Friday, April 14, at the Animas City Theatre.

DGO talked to Tash Neal of London Souls about their tour, their to-be-released-sometime-in-2017 album, and what the ghost of Sam Cooke would think of them.

in-between – limbo. Are we here or are we not here? Then there’s general love songs. I think the album is going to be really varied and a lot of it is super hard rock and a lot of it are songs where the reason we’re excited is because you’d never think they would be London Souls’ songs. It doesn’t sound like anything we’ve ever done. It’s also the first time we’ve had complete control over what we wanted our stuff to sound like.

of years. Not just my life, Chris’ life, too.

Chris [St. Hilaire] was in the hospital with me and it was so helpful because he was musically sensitive to this stuff because he was there and he lived through it. He was riding everything with me.

The ghost of a musical inspiration comes to your show, who would you want to see the London Souls?

Hear what Tash Neal has to say about Spotify, the business of being an artist, and upcoming shows with The Who online at dgomag. com

Do you think your car accident and recovery changed the way you create art?

[Inaudible name], Louis Armstrong, Sam Cooke, Woody Guthrie. Those four. I think they would like it.

GO!

The process remained the same because I think when you are a musician you work for the muse. To simplify that, for me, I don’t force anything. Everything should be a pure form of expression. I don’t sit down and go, “I’m going to write a song for a Mercedes car ad.” That feels fake to me. With this record, cathartically, naturally, I needed a place for stories to go. I needed to talk about stuff – not necessarily the surgery, but the coma and pain. You know what I mean? I went through a lot of loss that I needed to write about. That was going to come out, not necessarily consciously or distinctly. Maybe in one couplet in one song. You get to tell different stories and it all comes out though the same process just different material because of what happened.

How do you think Sam Cooke would describe your band?

Really, it deeply affected my life, those couple

He’d say that we were too loud [laughs]. But I think he’d like the songwriting and the chord changes and the approach – I would hope. I can only hope. Sam Cooke is one of the greatest. If he said, “You’re terrible,” I’d be grateful for that.

Would you still want the ghost of Sam Cooke to come to your show if you knew he was going to possess you for the after party?

London Souls w/ special guest When: 8:30 p.m. doors, 9 p.m. show, Friday, April 14 Where: Animas City Theatre, 128 E. College Drive Cost: $10 advance, $12 day of

Yes, yes I would. No doubt about that.

Ages: 18 and older

This interview has been edited and condensed for space and clarity.

Information: www.animascitytheatre.com/

—— Patty Templeton DGO Staff Writer

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[sound]

Downtown Lowdown | Bryant Liggett

The HillBenders do The Who’s ‘Tommy,’ but in bluegrass fashion

I

t’s the definitive rock opera. There’s a compelling storyline, beautiful transitions from song to song and scene to scene, and a few numbers that stand on their own as singles still heard on classic rock radio. As a package it’s damn near musical perfection, a record that fans have kept in their hearts and heads for decades. It’s The Who’s “Tommy,” and its omission from any musical discussion puts said discussion in the poppycock category.

Segments of the opera are still staples in Who set-lists, the 1975 film has its moments and the Broadway production pulled down some awards.

“Tommy” has been getting some new legs since 2015 when bluegrass band The HillBenders started performing the record as a “bluegrass opry.”

The HillBenders will perform “Tommy: A Bluegrass Opry” at the Community Concert Hall at Fort Lewis College on Thursday, April 13.

The idea for a bluegrass band to perform an album from the classic rock canon came from an outsider; Louis Meyers was a founder of the Austin music blowout South by Southwest, and had the idea of a bluegrass version of “Tommy” on his brain’s back-burner for years. He stalked The HillBenders at various shows to see if they were the right band for his vision, and they were.

“One day he called up and said, ‘I’ve had this idea for about 20, 25 years and I think you guys are the right band to do it’ and that’s when he laid it on us.

He felt like the entire record had the ability to go in

IF YOU GO Thursday, April 13, The HillBenders present The Who’s Tommy: A Bluegrass Opry, with special guest, La La Bones. 7:30 p.m. $24/$34. Community Concert Hall at Fort Lewis College, 1000 Rim Drive. Information: 247-7657. that direction. But he wanted it to be the right band.

He needed enough rock ’n’ roll; he needed enough bluegrass. He needed enough performance, enough vocal and instrumental ability, and he needed something that would capture the rock ’n’ roll attitude,” said guitar player Jim Rea. “Over the years of him peeking around the corner at our shows, he was taking it in, and he finally decided to lay it on us.”

They pull it off. Sure, there are some things miss-

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ing: A bluegrass band doesn’t have drums, and The Who had Keith Moon. Some parts of the album are cut short, or combined with other songs. But it’s presented as straight-forward as The Who presented it, as a sophisticated piece of music and storyline with aggressive and emotional playing.

It’s also received the blessing of its creator. Pete Townsend emailed the band saying he dug it, and went as far as inviting them to a Who show in Nashville.

It’s even dragged some classic rock fans out of their narrow confines and turned them onto bluegrass. Hopefully, it’s also dragged some bluegrass fans out of their narrow confines and turned them on to the extensive catalog of Courtesy of The HillBenders Townsend. “Quadrophenia,” “Empty Glass,” “White City,” “Rough Mix,” Tommy, and so much more; Townsend’s catalog is vast and fantastic.

“The Tommy thing turns Who fans onto acoustic music, Americana, and bluegrass. You get these old rockers coming out, and they come up and say ‘I was 13 years old when this came out.’ I think as they’ve gotten older, they’re still classic rock fans, they always will be, and they’ve got their crusty old Who shirt on,” said Rea. “But they’ve also matured into some Americana, some red dirt, some bluegrass, so the mixing of those two, one from their past, a rocking, youthful thing, and a more mature, acoustic rootsy thing. It’s a really cool combination for a lot of these old Who fans.”

Bryant Liggett is a freelance writer and KDUR station manager. liggett_b@fortlewis.edu.

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[sound] What’s new The Black Angels, “Death Song”

hometown and Seattle.

Sessions in both locales were produced, engineered, and mixed by the great Phil Ek, who has worked with the likes of Built to Spill, Les Savy Fav, The Shins, and Fleet Foxes among countless others.

Available: Friday, April 21, via Partisan Records on compact disc and standard black double vinyl LP. Also available at your local independent record store. Special, limited-edition pre-order CD and vinyl bundles are available directly from the band at their website and includes a multitude of extras, such as autographed screen-printed posters, vinyl slip mats, herb grinders, T-shirts, and even a satin jacket.

“Death Song” is the first full-length record in four years from the Austin-based progenitors of modern psych and was recorded between their

New at

April 14 Smith Street Band,“More Scared of You Than You Are of Me”

“Written and recorded in large part during the recent election cycle, the music on ‘Death Song’ serves as part protest, part emotional catharsis in a climate dominated by division, anxiety, and unease,” according to the band’s website. The songs themselves do

and Stone Flowers” is a genre-defining masterwork, and honestly it seems like “Hamartia” might follow in its footsteps.

The song “Zephyr” is catchy as all hell, and managing to make a catchy death metal song must always be applauded.

Catchy doesn’t mean pop, it just has to stick in your head, and I couldn’t get that riff out of my skull for days. November’s Doom are also a great breaking-in point for underground metal. So if you like the more mainstream side of extreme music but want to find a band whose T-shirts you won’t find at a Walmart, check out “Hamartia,” “Zephyr” especially. You’ll be surprised at enjoying something with some grit.

These Australian quiet punkers make triumphant and subdued music rife with emotion and strife. The lyrics evoke thoughts of melancholic optimism, the working-class existentialism of the 21st century distilled into anthemic neighborhood stories. »» “More Scar ed of You The most striking thing The String Than You Are of Me,” by about Smith Street Smith Street Ba Cheese Incident, nd band is the relatability “Believe” of the lyrics without I’m of the mind that sacrificing songwritfunk jams recorded in ing or limiting the scope of the lyrics studio don’t work so well most of the themselves. It shows the profundity time.

They lose that certain flavor, that of common occurrences within a pop certain feel.

“Believe” is a lush producrock cocoon that I love so dearly. tion, which is a good way to make me November’s Doom, want to listen. Keyboards and studio “Hamartia” wizardry fill the empty spaces to the point where one can really lose oneself As their name suggests, November’s in the song. Though String Cheese InciDoom play a style of heavy metal music dent tends to have shorter songs, they commonly called doom metal, taking still feel full of life. The title track is inspiration from Black Sabbath and runsquishy in all the right ways and full of ning with it until it becomes oppressive. ear-worm melodies that weave in and These guys have been doing it for more out of each other almost to the point than 30 years, and have been consisof being overwhelming. Though not my tently great to an astonishing degree. usual jam, I enjoyed “Believe.”

Their 1999 album “Of Sculpted Ivy

not stray, thankfully, too terribly far from their usual formula of heaviness, bombast, murky fuzz, and tribal drone. That said, a handful of tracks on the album are some of the best they’ve written to date. The lurching, chug of tracks like “Comanche Moon,” “I Dreamt,” and “Death March” will certainly appeal to both pre-existing fans and new ones alike.

The Black Angels are currently touring the new album, more or less, all summer, both in the United States and abroad. Catch them with A Place to Bury Strangers through May. Recommended for fans of Roky Erikson/The 13th Floor Elevators, King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard, Night Beats, or Brian Jonestown Massacre.

—— Jon E. Lynch KDUR_PD@fortlewis.edu

John Mayer,“The Search For Everything” Lead single about not being able to get over your famous ex-girlfriend notwithstanding, the dude has chops, and is much more than that aggravatingly catchy “Your Body is a Wonderland.”

He has newfound appreciation about

this area of the world from his time spent with Dead and Company, and the new record definitely feels like a response to that time touring. While some of the songs have really great guitar parts, a lot of it struck me more on the pop side.

—— Cooper Stapleton

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[beer]

First Draughts | Robert Alan Wendeborn

What’s in the works at Carver’s »» Head brewer Jose: Dandelion Saison and a super-high-gravity Belgian Quad on the way With the ski season wrapping up, and the start of rafting, biking, and all things summer, I’ve been feeling quite a bit of nostalgia for Durango (keep the pictures coming, guys). The way that you can get in a morning ride on the mountain, an afternoon raft, and an evening bike ride is probably the best part about Southwest Colorado. When I’m missing Durango, I usually will call up a random friend and shoot the shit till they get bored or I lose my sense of longing. This time, I called up Patrick Jose, head brewer at Carver Brewing Co., and had him fill me in on all the hot new gossip, and talk about all things beer.

I know Patrick from my first day at Ska. He was the second person I met, and he was my boss for

a good chunk of time, as well. He was a laid-back manager who led by example and was always clear about expectations on the brew floor. His keen eye for the little details (the mint on your pillow, as he would say), and analytical, yet artistic, approach to recipe design are definitely things I carry with me today. He’s also brewed some of the best beers in the world, helping win medals for Steamworks, Ska, and Carver at both the Great American Beer Festival and The World Beer Cup. So what’s going on right now at Carver’s?

We just got done brewing our annual Dandelion Saison for the Dandelion Festival. We put in 20 pounds of dandelions from the folks at Turtle Lake Refuge along with some experimental Continued on Page 11

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[beer]

Looking for an Easter Service that welcomes your WHOLE SELF?

From Page 10

hops, and a sprinkle of different herbs.

That’s always one of my favorite beers, it’s just a pure signal of the start to summer to me. What other kind of cool stuff are you guys working on?

Cody (Looman) brewed a super-high-gravity Belgian Quad that is still fermenting and getting really good attenuation. We’ve got a Russian Imperial Stout aging in bourbon barrels and a Wheat Wine that we brewed with Thirst Colorado and Glenwood Canyon Brewing that we’re going to age in oak for a while and we’ll have at next year’s Collaboration Fest.

So how’d you get your start in brewing? Were you a homebrewer, did you go to school for brewing, or was it some other combination?

I was a homebrewer. We got my dad a home brew kit for Christmas one year and it sat for years, then I pulled it out while I was in college. I brewed a batch, went to the home brew store the next day and bought some supplies for

another batch and asked if they needed help. I ended up working at the home brew store for a few years. The owner of the home brew shop was the head brewer at a brewery across the street and I got to help him out eventually.

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So what made you decide to go pro, to make brewing your profession?

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Well, I was in grad school studying geology at Texas Tech, actually, and I was dreading doing another year of school.

I figured I could finish my degree, or I could become a brewer. Eventually, (I) moved out to Durango to work at Steamworks.

Jared Kushner is President Trump’s son-in-law.

He is also Trump’s Senior White House adviser and the head of the Office of American Innovation, a Trump-created office to reduce federal bureaucracy.

Why this is not normal

If there’s not a job you’re willing to take, go to school for it. ’Cause there’s always a job on a packaging line or cleaning kegs, but if you want a leg up, go to college for brewing science.

Robert Alan Wendeborn is a former cellar operator at Ska Brewing and current lead cellar operator at Tin Roof Brewing in Baton Rouge, Louisiana.

FROM THE FILES OF

NOT NORMAL

There are such things as anti-nepotism laws that ensure that a president cannot reward friends or family with jobs. Yet, the Justice Department concluded that Trump giving a son-inlaw a high-ranking position in a White House “office” instead of an “executive agency” didn’t count as nepotism.

Since being appointed, Kushner has been tasked with advising Trump, revamping the Department of Veterans Affairs, reforming the criminal justice system, brokering peace in the Middle East, improving ties with Mexico, and

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What kind of advice do you have for someone, maybe a homebrewer that’s serious about brewing, and who wants to get into the brewing industry?

Jared Kushner is running the government News you need to know

DurangoUU.org 419 San Juan Drive Durango, CO

shrinking federal bureaucracy. Each of these tasks could take decades for entire government agencies to succeed at. Trump gave them all to an inexperienced real estate investor, Kushner. Trump trusts almost no one to get anything done and because of that, he spreads his inner circle so thin that they won’t get anything done, either.

Don’t think Kushner can accomplish all that? He’ll scare you into thinking he can. Kushner hired Hollywood publicist Josh Raffel (who has promoted horror hits like “The Purge” and “Insidious”) to work for the Office of American Innovation.

Maybe Raffel can ruffle up enough noise to cover up the newly-released fact that Kushner omitted meeting Russian officials on his Questionnaire for National Security Positions paperwork before Trump hired him.

—— Patty Templeton

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[weed]

TREATING PETS WITH CANNABIS

DON’T GET YOUR ANIMAL STONED, GET THEM WELL »» Marijuana

can aid a range of maladies, but extra care and caution should be used Patty Templeton DGO STAFF WRITER

A

young Golden Retriever is low energy. He’s not eating. He has cancer, and the chemo decreases his appetite.

A Calico cat is old, kind, and tired. She has hip pain and wobble-walks to the couch where she winces when she jumps to her sun spot.

A beagle cowers under a shoe pile in a hall closet every time a storm thunders through. Her body shudders with anxiety for the hours and hours of the bad weather.

What do these three pets have in common? Their maladies could be lessened if treated with cannabis.

Before you blow Super Lemon Haze smoke rings at your chinchilla or feed your puppy illness-inducing caramel edibles, let’s get a few facts straight.

All cannabis is not OK for pets Dr. Robert Silver, retired veterinarian, current chief medical officer of Rx Vitamins, and author of “Medical Marijuana and Your Pet: The Definitive Guide,” said that there are two main ways that pets receive cannabis. One: pet owners dose their pets with marijuana from a dispensary. This can result in the pet receiving a high level of THC, to which dogs are especially sensitive to. Two: through hemp-based products that do not need to be bought from a dispensary. Silver said, “Hemp has all of the medicinal benefits of medical marijuana without the possibly harmful THC.” Got that? THC can be harmful to your pets. Your vet isn’t allowed to prescribe a Schedule 1 substance to you, anyways. Do not let your arthritic hamster cram a dank nug in his maw. If you want to help your animal companion, start with a veterinarian-recommended cannabinoid (CBD) product.

Why you can’t feed your Guinea pig a pot brownie Saddest possible scenario: You give your pet marijuana hoping to ease pain and you accidentally kill it. Dr. Karlene Stange, a veterinarian at Animas Animals, said, “A dog can die. It’s rare, but they can get so stoned that they vomit and vomit and vomit.” It is called intractable vomiting. That means repeated vomiting that resists treatment and causes severe dehydration. In extreme cases, this cyclic vomiting can cause a stupor, then a coma, then death. Stange continued, “Even if it is just vomiting a lot, you can end up at the vet and the vet is expensive. It’s an emergency call that involves IV fluids.”

If you give your pet what you consider is a controlled dose of THC, it still isn’t good for their mental state. “Pets aren’t supposed to get Continued on Page 14

Alexi Grojean/Special to DGO

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[weed] From Page 13

high. They don’t like it. They feel uncomfortable,” Silver said. “Medical Marijuana and Your Pet” states that your pet’s eyes can glaze over and they can start excessively drooling or rapidly breathing. The pet may fall over with their legs still straight, lose bladder or bowel control, or they may paddle their legs and whine while laying down unable to get up.

“The problem with the medical marijuana is that the THC is borderline toxic to dogs unless they’re being given the right approach to dosing,” said Silver. “There was a paper published in 2012 [by Dr. Stacey Meola in the Journal of Veterinary Emergency and Critical Care] that found a positive correlation, in the number of people who got cards for medical marijuana and the number of admissions to dogs to the ER. People get their edibles and they leave them out on the table and a dog comes by and snarfs it up and they get a huge dosage, much larger than a therapeutic dose, a toxic dose. Plus, a lot of the edibles have chocolate in them. Chocolate is definitely toxic to dogs as are raisins and macadamia nuts.”

Bottom line: If you don’t want to cause your pet discomfort or a toxic reaction, avoid anything containing THC.

CBD treatable health issues in pets “The American Holistic Veterinary Medical Association (AHVMA) stance is that there are a lot of benefits to cannabinoid oils,” said Stange. Examples of what CBD can treat in pets are: »» anxiety »» arthritis »» bone healing »» cancer »» inflammation »» neurodegenerative diseases »» pain »» psoriasis »» seizures »» stiffness CBD is not a cure-all. It should be taken in low doses and only as directed. You should speak with your vet to see what combined approach is appropriate to treat your pet.

CBD as a pet supplement Proper doses of CBD through treats, tinctures, or what have you, can be used every day or as needed.

For example, if you have a pet with separation anxiety, that pet may benefit from administrations of CBD for several days before you leave on your trip. While you are gone, having your pet-sitter continue that dose could ease your animal’s angst.

Then you get back, your pet is fine, and it doesn’t need CBD until you travel next.

“At the same time,” Silver said, “if you have a pet with pain and arthritis, you could use it every day.

Maybe stop a day or two to give your pet a break, but everyday usage would be recommended.”

Alexi Grojean/Special to DGO

Researchers like Silver are beginning to notice that, “Interestingly, though it has drug-like effects, it also has hormone-like effects, in that tiny amounts of it get things moving ... We are finding that lower doses may work better. Which is good because it makes it more cost effective.”

I’m not wasting money on something not researched, right?

There’s no such thing as a perfect cure. Some animals may experience adverse side effects or lesser gains than others but, in the second decade of the 21st century, “It’s about time we look at the beneficial effects of these plant substances and take advantage of them,” said Stange. It is also good to consider the side effects of traditional pharmaceuticals and weigh them against the side effects of plant-based options.

Silver said, “There are still many difficulties in terms of the research, but it is not true that you can only do research in states where there is medical marijuana or legal hemp ... You can do research at any supportive academic institution, but in order to be able to handle the research materials – the cannabis or the hemp – the (Drug Enforcement

Agency) requires that you get a Schedule 1 license. They also require that you source your materials, marijuana or hemp, only from them.”

Experts can do marijuana research for pets or people in states where it is illegal to sell or consume it, but many companies choose to conduct research in legalized states where their research options are wider open.

Additionally, not all research is created equal.

Companies that financially back academic or independent studies are to be scrutinized. “We have to look very carefully at the research to make sure that it does not contain bias within it – the company trying to create a study that will better market their product,” said Silver.

More success stories, please.

CBD is popular with owners of older pets that Continued on Page 15

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[weed] CBD for pets? What does that even look like?

There are a plethora of CBD products specifically made for your pets.

CBD can be used as an essential oil, a tincture, biscuits, bars, balms, syrup, honey, soft chews, topical sprays, powders, lotions – you name it and it’s out there.

You can find these products at pet stores, through your veterinarian, and online – legally, because they contain a non-psychotropic .3 percent or less of THC. The two most highly-praised and common brands in Durango are Pet ReLeaf, found at Pet Haus and Creature Comforts, and Rx Vitamins for Pets (specifically HempRx), which can be attained through a veterinarian like Stange at Animas Animals.

Though you can buy CBD pet products over the counter at any age, you shouldn’t treat your pet without speaking to your veterinarian.

From Page 14

noticed that when I give him the hemp, he is more likely to come up to me and ask to be petted.”

Pet ReLeaf CBD products are getting good feedback at Pet Haus. Manager David Davis said that Edibites treats are the most popular.

“There have been a lot of stories that come back to us about it helping with seizures, anxiety, and inflammation. We’ve even had customers say that, in conjunction with additional treatments, that tumors shrink when using CBD ... The CBD products have been great. We haven’t had any negative feedback.”

struggle with inflammatory diseases. Sayrah Sims, manager of Animas Herbal Wellness Center, said, “I personally have used CBD Pet ReLeaf treats to aid my Stange dog Zorra in her recovery from masticatory mitosis, an inflammatory disease of the jaw muscles. I did so in addition to using the steroids that the vet prescribed her.”

“I am retired from practice, so I don’t get to have as many pets to work with as I used to, Silver but I do get to talk to a lot of veterinarians who are And encouraged and happy remember to have HempRx in their hands,” said Silver.

Clean up the “One vet said that she crumbs from your just can’t believe it. She edibles. Don’t leave had a patient on three pot on the coffee table. different anti-convulDon’t leave a crunchy, delicious bag of CBD sion agents and the antreats where your pet imal wasn’t doing well. can tear into them.

She gave it the hemp But if you accidentally at a moderate dosage do, and your pet eats a and now it is off all whole bunch of what of those medications it’s not supposed to, call and is seizure-free.” the vet immediately.

Silver continued, “I have Use the smallest dose first, no matter a rescue dog of my own, Ollie. He the size of your pet. Avoid THC. Wait must have been pretty badly abused at least three hours before adminisbecause even though he loves me and wants to be around me all the time, he tering another dose if you think the is still very nervous and jumps when I first one didn’t work and, talk to your go to pet him. I’ve been working with vet first, not only when an emergency him and working the anxiety, and I’ve comes up.

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[ weed ] Seeing Through the Smoke Christopher Gallagher

Geography, climate shaped original indicas, sativas

I

n the beginning, there was, simply, cannabis. And, if you lived in a place where it grew naturally, life was good. These were the original landrace strains, bred in nature and carrying the characteristics dictated by the environments from which they developed over thousands of years.

If you lived in the rugged, mountainous Middle East, you had short, stout, bush-like plants available to you to do with as you would – and what you would do is make hash, beautiful hash rolled between your fingers and gathered into beautiful sticky piles. These were the original indicas, which delivered a mellow, hypnotic high. If you lived in parts of the steamy Southeast Asian jungle, you would have access to towering, lanky plants that swayed like hula dancers in the wind. These were the original sativas and they delivered an uplifting, spiritual high. If you lived in the middle ground of the Indian subcontinent, you would potentially have access to one or the other of these styles of plant (or phenotypes), depending on your geography and meteorological conditions. If you lived anywhere else, you were pretty much shit out of luck.

On one hand, I envy these aboriginal potheads for their union with nature, but if we want to talk about hitting the sweet spot with regard to perfect timing, being a cannabis aficionado today is akin to being a basketball fan in 1979, the year Magic and Bird entered the league, or a rock ’n’ roll fan entering high school in 1969, or a hip-hop fan doing the same in 1989 – sometimes things seem to vibrate at an absolutely otherworldly frequency, and right now we are enjoying the fruits of the labor of the past four decades of folks worldwide who put life and liberty on the line to bring us a bounty never before seen in human history.

With the explosive spread of popularity and legality worldwide, we, as consumers, can walk into a store and choose the characteristics we damn well please: genotype, phenotype, cannabanoid and terpene profile, taste, color – the options are almost

Alexi Grojean/Special to DGO

limitless. We are blessed with the opportunity, if we so choose, to take things to the next level; we can get our hands on seed or clones, put them in our own dirt (or water or other growth medium) and see how they grow under our own loving care; we can even decide to try our hand as a cannabis breeder and create our very own strains.

Every single bud, cookie, or dab we ingest is the descendant of these landrace strains that originated in places like Turkey, Lebanon, Iran, Pakistan, Nepal, Bangladesh, and Thailand. The geographical

base of landraces expanded during the second half of the last millennium as European colonialism brought with it seeds culled from these points of origin to Africa and the Americas, creating localized cannabis gene pools that eventually led to the establishment of the strains that comprise the second wave of landrace cannabis – Durban Poison, Malawi/Swazi/Angola Gold, Congolese, Kilimanjaro, Panama Red, Acapulco/Colombian Gold, Maui Wowie, and many others – all strains that thrived in climates that mimicked their original homes, and as we traveled through the 1970s and ’80s, true North American cultivars (called heirloom strains) began to take hold in the Emerald Triangle of California, Colorado, the Pacific Northwest, and British Columbia, like Haze, OG Kush, and Northern Lights.

These plants form the genetic base of the almost inconceivable variety available to us today. Next week, we will continue our walk down memory lane as we investigate the movement of cannabis indoors and the ensuing butterfly effect. Be well until then, friends.

Christopher Gallagher lives with his wife and their four dogs and two horses. Life is pretty darn good. Contact him at chrstphrgallagher@gmail.com.

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[ weed ] Elevated Discourse Meggie J

CONCENTRATES AND DABBING:

Demystified, explained

I

n the landscape of legal marijuana, a new group of products has started to saturate the scene. Marijuana concentrates – highly potent extracts of cannabinoids and terpenes that are removed from the plant material for consumption – are now easier and more cost-efficient to extract because of the accessibility to proper facilitates and a variety of extraction methods done with state oversight in the burgeoning marijuana industry.

The idea of a concentrate is not entirely new to marijuana products; you might be familiar with hash, a concentrate made by pressing marijuana through a screen, either using heat or ice, or keif, a concentrate made by sifting plant material so the trichomes fall off into a powder form. But what Meggie J/Special to DGO makes this new group of concentrates different »» Clockwise from the bottom: Shatter, live resin, wax, budder, is not only how the marijuana concentrate is exsolvent-less rosin, honey oil ready to dispense, and, in the center, an tracted, but also how it is consumed. oil distillate.

The science of concentrates may seem more complex than it really is. Basically, a solvent such as CO2 or butane is mixed with marijuana (the of any material that can withFor a video of solute), thus creating a solution allowing the cannastand high levels of heat, such a recycling dab as titanium, ceramic, or quartz binoids and terpenes to be extracted from the plant rig in action, go (Originally they were made of After extraction, the plant material is dismaterial. to dgomag.com titanium and shaped like nails, carded and each solvent then dissipates, leaving behind hence the name.) This nail is solutions of varying consistencies, such as wax, budder, then heated with a small hand-held torch similar to ones flake, shatter, and oil, all names given to describe the used to put the crust on a crème brulee. After it cools a consistency of the end product. Because each solute is bit, a pea-sized amount of concentrate is placed onto the different at the beginning of the extraction process, as nail and drawn like normal through the mouthpiece. The well as each solvent used, the end result and potency of advantage to the dab rig is not only less waste, but the each concentrate, or “dabs,” varies. cooling effect the water has on the concentrate.

How people consume concentrates differs depending on The word “dab” is one of those nifty terms that can be the consistency, potency, and taste of the concentrate. Conused as a noun, verb, or adjective. A dab refers not only centrates are best consumed via vaporizing. For oils, the to any of the variety of concentrates that can be used in a most common is a vape pen in which the oil is contained dab rig, but also to the act of using said concentrate, such in a cartridge attached to a lithium battery resulting in as dabbing. Dabbing is now quite popular, and the use a vaporizing device about the size of a ballpoint pen. For of concentrates is on the rise due to new, inventive ways thicker waxes, budder, or brittle concentrates like flake to get the most flavor and potency out of marijuana. It’s and shatter, you can buy portable rechargeable vaporizers important to know that the THC percentage in some of with small chambers to fill with your own concentrate. these concentrates is in the 90s (for reference, most highWhile you can put concentrates into your pipe to smoke, shelf weed we smoke is 25 percent). The word “concenit is not recommended because the heat applied through combustion will mostly melt your concentrate, resulting trate” means something – take heed, just a dab’ll do you! in very little smoke, and a lot of messy and expensive waste. But the most effective way to consume concentrates Thanks to my friends, bud tenders Laura and Danny at the is to vaporize it with what is known as a dab rig.

Telluride Green Room, and especially their manager Joe, for Now down to brass tacks, or should I say titanium their time, education, and advice. nails. A dab rig is a glass water pipe, similar to a bong.

However, instead of a bowl, the concentrate is put onto Meggie J is a published poet and freelance writer living in the a nail – a trough around an opening that then fits over Four Corners. She is an avid reader, rafter, and connoisseur of cannabis. She can be reached at coxwell.meggiej@gmail.com. the down-stem of the water pipe. This nail can be made

A quick guide to indicas and sativas For any marijuana user, it’s important to distinguish between indicas and sativas.

Keep in mind that all people and all marijuana products are different, as is everyone’s individual reaction to them. As always, be responsible and use in moderation.

Indica Where it’s from: Originally hailing from drier climates, this plant grows short and squat, with broad leaves and dense, sticky-smelling buds.

General effects: »»Contains higher levels of CBD, when mixed with TCH is an excellent source of pain relief »»Great for alleviating stress »»Lowers heart rate »»Helps with insomnia Tip: Indica is not especially great for social situations. It is not a chatty weed, however, it is great for nights you just want to binge watch Netflix in your jammies eating popcorn until you melt into your couch.

Examples: African Queen, Grape Kush

Sativa Where it’s from: Hailing from more humid conditions than their indica cousins, these plants are tall with skinny leaves and the buds tend to be tight and thin.

General effects: »»Contains higher levels of THCV; when mixed with THC creates a more clear head buzz »»Uplifting »»Social and motivating »»Creative and fun Tip: Sativa is not particularly good for nervous people, as it can be a little too strong for those with anxiety issues. While some will love the pick-me-up and may want to clean their house till it sparkles, others might experience mild paranoia.

Examples: C99, Jack Herer

Hybrid A combination of both sativa and indica, hybrids offer the best of both worlds, giving a middle-of-the-road high. While some hybrids are 50/50, many are either sativa or indica dominant depending on their lineage.

Your local bud tender can help you decide which of these is best for you depending on your desire.

Examples: Blue Dream, Strawberry Kush —— Meggie J

������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������� Thursday, April 13, 2017 | 17

[love and sex]

Savage Love | Dan Savage

She wants me in control but isn’t up for anything I’ve read your column for as long as I had access to the internet and was interested in sex, so here goes: I’m a 27-year-old male with a 42-year-old girlfriend. We met at work; we were both going through divorce. At the beginning, holy moly! My dream girl in the bedroom. We’ve been together for a year, and the sex is still the best I’ve ever had – she says she feels the same – but it’s vanilla. I am assertive and in-control in the bedroom, which works for both of us, as she prefers to be passive and wants me to make moves or switch it up. I want to do other things, but she doesn’t want to do anything anymore other than missionary-position sex. Anal, oral, watching porn together, bondage, voyeurism – she’s not up for any of it. There’s always an excuse: “I’m not young like you,” “I’m not flexible like you,” “I have done that before and don’t like it, no, no, no.” Do I just suck it up and be grateful for what I have or what?

She Hates Options Totally, Desires One Way Now She wants you to be in control and switch it up but doesn’t want to do any of the things you suggest when you take control and attempt to switch things up. Hmm. Either you’re bad at everything you’ve attempted other than missionary, SHOTDOWN, or she has a very limited sexual repertoire and/or actual physical limitations or health issues she hasn’t divulged to you.

Considering the age difference here, and considering that this is a post-divorce rebound relationship for you both, the odds are stacked against anything long-term. I don’t mean this relationship is doomed to fail. What I mean is this: You’ll probably be together for another year or two before parting ways. While most people would define that as a “failed relationship,” anyone who’s been reading my column for as long as he’s been interested in sex can tell you that I don’t define failure that way. If two

people are together for a time, if they enjoy each other’s company (and genitals), if they part amicably and always remember each other fondly and/or remain friends, their relationship can be counted as a success – even if both parties get out of it alive and go on to form new relationships.

In the meantime, SHOTDOWN, enjoy the amazing vanilla sex for as long as it lasts – which could be forever. Anyone who’s been reading my column for as long as he’s been interested in sex knows that I’m not always right.

My BF and I have been dating for two years. He’s 21; I’m 20 (and female). When I noticed my boyfriend wanted his ass played with and liked being submissive, I couldn’t help but wonder if something more was going on. I snooped through his browser history (not my proudest moment) and found he was looking at pictures of naked men. Then I saw he posted an ad on Craigslist under “men seeking men.” He responded to one person, saying he wasn’t sure if he was straight or bi, but he had a car and could drive over! The guy responded saying how about tonight, and my BF never responded to him. I confronted him.

He explained it was just a fantasy he had, he’s totally straight, and he was never planning on going through with it. After the dust settled, he told me he never wanted to lose me. We then went to a sex shop and bought a strap-on dildo for me to use on him, which we both really enjoy. He bought me a diamond bracelet as an apology and promised never to fuck up again.

A couple months have passed, and things are great, but I still feel bothered. He loves my tits, ass, and pussy. He eats me out and initiates sex as often as I do. Just cuddling with me gets him hard. Which is why I’m even more perplexed. He doesn’t like to talk about the Craigslist incident and gets upset when I

bring it up. Should I leave it alone?

Is my boyfriend secretly gay?

Confused And Curious Let’s review the facts: Your boyfriend digs your tits, cuddling you makes him hard, and he loves eating your pussy. You also discovered an ad your boyfriend posted to Craigslist where he said he wasn’t sure if he was bi or straight, a discovery that created a crisis in your relationship, a crisis that was resolved with a strap-on dildo and a diamond bracelet.

Your boyfriend isn’t “secretly gay,” CAC, he’s “actually bisexual.” You know, like he said he was – or said he might be (but totally is) – in that email exchange you found.

At this point, I’m required to tell you that bisexuals are just as capable of honoring monogamous commitments as monosexuals, i.e., gays, lesbians, and breeders. But since the data shows that monosexuals are bad at monogamy – the data says bisexuals are, too – I’m not sure why I’m required to say that or how it’s supposed to be comforting. But even if your boyfriend never has sex with a man, CAC, even if it takes him years to drop the “totally straight” line, you should go ahead and accept the fact that your boyfriend is bisexual.

Pretend to be shocked when he finally comes out to you – there might be a necklace in it for you – and then get busy setting up your first MMF threesome.

My girlfriend and I have been together for about 18 months. We’re both 29 and are in the process of creating a future together: We live together, we have a great social life, we adopted a dog. We’re compatible, and I do love her. However, our sex life could be a whole lot better.

I like sex to be kinky, and she likes it vanilla. She is adamant about monogamy, while I want to be monogamish. I feel strongly that this is who I am sexually and my sexual desires

are not something I can change. My girlfriend thinks I’m searching for something I’ll never find and says I need to work through it. Because we are so compatible in every other aspect of our relationship, should I keep trying to work past the unsatisfying sex?

Needs Advice, Want Threesomes Divorce courts are filled to bursting with couples who made the same mistake you and your girlfriend are currently making – a mistake that gets harder to unmake with every dog you adopt or lease you sign. You’re not sexually compatible, NAWT – and sexual incompatibility is a perfectly legitimate reason to end an otherwise good relationship. The importance of sexual compatibility in sexually-exclusive relationships (the kind your girlfriend wants) cannot be stressed enough. Sexual compatibility is important in open and/or monogamish relationships, too, of course, but there are work-arounds in an open relationship.

The gaslight bar is set so low these days that I’m going to go ahead and accuse your girlfriend of gaslighting you: There are people out there who have the kind of relationship you would like to have – it’s a lie that no one has a GGG partner or a successful monogamish relationship – and I have it on good authority that many of these people are straight. You’ll never find everything you want, NAWT, since no one gets everything they want. But you’re too young to settle for the girlfriend you’ve got.

You’ve already made the dog mistake. Get out before you make the child mistake.

Dan Savage is a nationally syndicated sex advice columnist writing for The Stranger in Seattle. Contact him at mail@savagelove.net or @fakedansavage on Twitter and listen to his podcast every week at savagelovecast.com.

18 | Thursday, April 13, 2017 •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

[happening] When music and politics meet

Raise money and a ruckus with iAM Music Who’s bringing the good times and hot new tunes?

Kids, man. They aren’t jaded yet and they’re pushing the boundaries of musical creativity. SO! If you want new music to dance away your worries to, support the youngsters who are going to make it.

How? Join Hello, Dollface, Eldergrown, and Alpen Rising for the #MusicSaves concert at the Durango Arts Center, 802 East Second Ave., on Friday, April 14. Additional music provided by iAM Music students, RubyBlu, Laney Rie, and Celia +Elsa.

Every 98 seconds, someone is sexually assaulted in America.

Politics and poetry come together at HipHop Against Sexual Assault on Thursday, April 13, at Fort Lewis College, 1000 Rim Drive Head to the Vallecito Room in the Student Union from 7-9 p.m. to see rapper Masta Ace, one of the greatest New York MCs ever, and Wake Self, one of New Mexico’s most popular musicians, throw down civic awareness with mad skills.

»» Eldergrown

Tickets are $12.50 in advance and $15 dayof. All of the proceeds go to music scholarships for at-risk youth through iAM Music.

Thursday “Dance for Balance” dance class for seniors, 3 p.m., donations welcome, Abso-

Dr. Torie Weiston-Serdan and Dr. Lauren Leigh Kelly will speak before the show about sexual assault and how it affects our communities. Like how one out of six American women have been the victim of an attempted or completed rape or how one in 33 American men, have experienced the same.

Doors at 7 p.m. Show starts at 8 p.m.

All ages.

More information at www.iammusic.us.

Aspen Drive, 247-4213.

Fort Lewis College Jazz Ensemble and Symphonic Band, 7 p.m., $5-$15,

lute Physical Therapy and Wellness, 277 East Eighth Ave., 764-4094.

Community Concert Hall, Fort Lewis College, 1000 Rim Drive, www.durangoconcerts.com.

Blended Learning Outreach meeting, 4 p.m., Durango Community Recreation

The Robin Davis Duo, 9:30 p.m., Balcony

Center, 2700 Main Ave., 375-7300.

Kirk James Blues Band, 9:30 p.m., Bal-

Trails 2000 Project Sky Steps, 4 p.m., Nature Trail, 978 East Sixth Ave., www.fortlewis.edu.

cony Backstage, 600 Main Ave., 422-8088.

New Approaches to Conflict Management, 6 p.m., $97, Durango Space, 1221

Main Ave, 828-1340.

Indie Lens Pop-up: National Bird, 6

p.m., Durango Public Library, 1900 East Third Ave., 375-3380.

“Hip-Hop Against Sexual Assault” performance by Wake Self and Masta Ace, 7 p.m., Vallecito Room, Student

Union, Fort Lewis College, 1000 Rim Drive, www.fortlewis.edu.

The HillBenders present The Who’s “Tommy,” 7:30 p.m., $24-$34, Community

Concert Hall, Fort Lewis College, 1000 Rim Drive, www.durangoconcerts.com.

Friday Hozhoni Days Powwow, all-day event,

$6, Whalen Gymnasium, Fort Lewis College, 1000 Rim Drive, www.fortlewis.edu.

Boulevard Skin Bar grand opening celebration, 5 p.m., Boulevard Skin Bar, 572

East Third Ave., 422-8222.

Divorce Care Group meeting, 6 p.m.,

$25, First United Methodist Church, 2917

Bar and Grill, 600 Main Ave., 422-8088.

Saturday Hozhoni Days Powwow, all-day event,

$6, Whalen Gymnasium, Fort Lewis College, 1000 Rim Drive, www.fortlewis.edu.

rango Space, 1221 Main Ave., 828-1340.

Henry Stoy Piano, 11 a.m., Jean-Pierre Bak-

Comida, 639 Main Ave., 764-4723.

ery and Wine Bar, 601 Main Ave., 247-7700.

Irish music jam session, 12:30 p.m.,

Irish Embassy Pub, 900 Main Ave., 403-1200, www.theirishembassypub.com.

Jazz church experienced musician session, 6 p.m., Derailed Pour House, 725

Main Ave., 247-5440, www.derailedpourhouse. com.

Karaoke, 8 p.m., 8th Avenue Tavern, 509

East Eighth Ave., 259-8801.

Monday Four Corners Arts Forum, 9 a.m., KDUR

Narrow Gauge Railroad, 479 Main Ave., 2472733.

People’s Practice in the Park, 12:30

practic Wellness Studio, 635 East Second Ave., 385-0321.

Reiki and Pets, 10 a.m., $20, Cafe of Life

Chiropractic Wellness Studio, 635 East Second Ave., 385-0321.

Henry Stoy Piano, 11 a.m., Jean-Pierre

Bakery and Wine Bar, 601 Main Ave., 2477700.

Pete Giuliani, 2:30 p.m., Balcony Bar and Grill, 600 Main Ave., 422-8088.

Amoramora, 9:30 p.m., Balcony Backstage, 600 Main Ave., 422-8088.

Sunday Veterans Easter brunch, 8 a.m., $10,

Free and open to the public.

Durango Elks Lodge, 901 East Second Ave., 247-2296.

Peanuts Easter Beagle Express train ride, 9:45 a.m., $79-$99, Durango & Silverton

Reiki share and how to use Reiki with pets, 10 a.m., $20, Cafe of Life Chiro-

Music makes the medicine go down easier with a subject that can be hard to discuss.

91.9/93.9 FM, www.kdur.org. p.m., Buckley Park, 247-8395, www.turtlelakerefuge.org.

Happy Hour Yoga, 5:30-6:30 p.m., Ska

Brewing Co., 225 Girard St., www.skabrewing. com.

Stillwater Music new facility grand opening, 6-8 p.m., Stillwater Music, 1316

Main Ave., Suite C, 247-5095, info@stillwatermusic.org.

Spoken Word, 7-9 p.m., Steaming Bean,

downstairs at the Irish Embassy Pub, 900 Main Ave., 403-1200, www.thebean.com.

Tuesday Master’s Men Colorado, 6:30 a.m., DoubleTree Hotel, 501 Camino del Rio, 259-6580.

“Memory, Truth, and Machetes” Creative Nonfiction 101, 6 p.m., $90, Du-

Tango Practica, 7 p.m., Cerda 7 Cantina y

Wednesday Floor Barre conditioning class, 3 p.m., donations welcome, Absolute Physical Therapy and Wellness, 277 East Eighth Ave., 764-4094.

Trails 2000 Project Sky Steps, 4 p.m., Nature Trail, 978 East Sixth Ave., www.fortlewis.edu.

Citizens Climate Lobby monthly meeting, 6 p.m., St. Mark’s Episcopal Church,

910 East Third Ave., 247-1129.

Breastfeeding workshop, 6 p.m., $25, Kids Rock, 563 Main Ave., 259-9400.

Lecture: Conflict in Syria, 6 p.m., Room

130, Noble Hall, Fort Lewis College, 1000 Rim Drive, www.fortlewis.edu.

Fairy-gardening class, 6:30 p.m., La

Plata County Fairgrounds, 2500 Main Ave., 749-5582.

ManKind project celebration, 6:30 p.m., Durango Community Recreation Center, 2700 Main Ave., 375-7300.

Submissions To submit listings for publication in DGO and www.dgomag.com, visit

www.swscene.com, click “Add Your Event,” enter the event info into the form, and submit.

Listings at www.swscene.com will appear on www.dgomag.com and in our weekly print edition. Posting an event on www.swscene.com is free and takes one day to process.

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To advertise in DGO Deals contact us at 970-247-3504 ������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������� Thursday, April 13, 2017 | 21

Horoscope ARIES (March 21 to April 19) You will be impulsive and spontaneous this week because you have a strong desire to do your own thing. Feelings of freedom make you want to set your own boundaries and determine your own course.

TAURUS (April 20 to May 20) This could be a restless week for you because you will rebel against anything that restricts you. You do not want to be confined or held back by rules. (Yes, you feel rebellious!)

GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) A friend might surprise you this week by doing something quite outrageous.

Or perhaps you will meet someone new who is outrageous. Either way, it’s fascinating.

CANCER (June 21 to July 22)

Bizarro

You do not want people telling you

what to do this week, especially bosses, parents and teachers. You want to call the shots!

LEO (July 23 to Aug. 22) You have your own ideas about religion and politics and do not want others to try to dissuade you. You also might impulsively travel somewhere this week.

VIRGO (Aug. 23 to Sept. 22) Discussions about inheritances and shared property might suddenly change this week. You might want things to be different, or perhaps somebody else does. Be alert to whatever happens because it might surprise you.

LIBRA (Sept. 23 to Oct. 22) Friends and partners are unpredictable this week. They will either surprise you or respond to you in a surprising way.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23 to Nov. 21) You want the freedom to do your own thing at work this week. You also might want to introduce reforms and better ways of doing things. Why not?

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22 to Dec. 21) Dealing with children might be challenging this week because they want control over their actions. Likewise, romantic relationships will be full of surprises!

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22 to Jan. 19) It’s hard to predict how a discussion with a parent or an authority figure at home will go this week. You don’t want anyone telling you what to do. You also want to break free of routine. (This will be interesting.)

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20 to Feb. 18)

You’re full of bright and clever ideas because you can think outside the box.

For sure, your daily routine will change.

Stay flexible.

PISCES (Feb. 19 to March 20) Watch your money this week because things are unpredictable. You might find money, or you might lose money.

Keep your eyes open.

BORN THIS WEEK You are quick, bright, speedy and intelligent. You don’t hesitate to speak your mind. Something you’ve been involved with for about nine years will end this year in order to make room for something new to enter your world.

Although this is a year of service to others, it also is a great year to travel.

Get ready for a fresh, new cycle waiting in your future! © 2017 King Features Syndicate Inc.

weekly bestsellers April 2 – 8 »»Thirteen Reasons Why, by Jay Asher (Paperback) »»Milk and Honey, by Rupi Kaur (Paperback) »»The Funniest Joke Book Ever!, Bathroom Readers’ Institute (Paperback) »»Listen: Five Simple Tools to Meet Your Everyday Parenting Challenges, by Patty Wipfler (Paperback)

»»The Four Agreements, by Don Miguel Ruiz (Paperback) »»A Man Called Ove, by Fredrik Backman (Paperback) »»The Wisdom of Moms: Love and Lessons from the Animal Kingdom, by Bridget E. Hamilton (Hard-

cover) »»Ladies of the Canyons: A League of Extraordinary Women and Their Adventures in the American Southwest, by Lesley Poling-Kempes

(Paperback) »»A Dog’s Purpose, by W. Bruce Cameron (Paperback) »»A Wrinkle in Time, by Madeline L’Engle (Paperback)

22 | Thursday, April 13, 2017 •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

[Durango’s stories, told in their own words]

First Person | Cyle Talley

‘They would dance, and then they would

STOP AND ARGUE’

»» Stephen

Sellers, on dancing in the street with locals, and unplugging during his recent trip to Cuba You’ve seen Stephen Sellers. On stage behind an upright bass with the Six Dollar String Band, or spinning as DJ Bad Goat, he’s one of those Durangoans who is everywhere. He has an effortless, megawatt smile and a genial good nature that makes those around him feel, well, good. I spoke with him about his recent trip to Cuba and what he’s taking away from his time there. I tell his story here, in his own words.

S

aturday afternoon, about 2 o’clock, and I wake up from a nap to hear 50 Cent blaring, “I’m a muthaf-kin’ P-I-M-P.” My wife and I were staying on the fourth floor of a place in central Havana and someone had brought a sound system out across the street. It was just blasting music, which wasn’t too crazy, I guess.

I mean, the night before, the music didn’t stop until 2 or 3 in the morning, and it was loud – like for everyone to hear. Luckily, we brought earplugs.

Anyway, I get up, go out onto the balcony, and look down to see a group of kids dancing together on the street. They were in two rows, dancing in this very structured way. It looked like an old social dance – like an »» Stephen Sellers English courtship sort of thing, but to 50 Cent.

These kids were working on these dance moves. The music would stop, and they would start arguing about whatever it was that they were working on.

Then the music changed to this tune – I think it’s called “The Ballad of Adeline,” this very beautiful piano ballad – and it became clear that what they were doing was something pretty serious. They danced all day and then well into the night. They would dance, and then they would stop and argue. Someone had f--ked up, someone wasn’t pulling their weight, someone just didn’t like the choreography or whatever, I don’t know.

Come to find out that it was the quinceañera for one of the girls in the group, her coming-of-age party. I love the idea of friends coming together to figure this thing out – and it’s easy to romanticize it – but that was a beautiful moment. It set the stage for our last night in Havana. I heard the music come on, and we just happened to be eating at a restaurant right across the street from where the party was. I had watched them so much that I had learned the dance moves, so I went

outside and joined them dancing. I don’t know if they were amused by it, or were more like, “What the f--k?!” It was funny because it was a three- or four-part choreography, and I nailed it. I don’t know if we were overstepping our boundaries as American tourists or not [laughs], but it was so nice to be joyful.

In the words of this Cuban bookie that we met, “You don’t need to do anything while you’re here other than unplug.

That’s the most important thing you need to do as Americans. Unplug, and go from there.”

I took that to heart. I mean, I’m not a Luddite.

I’m not trying to unplug from my cellphone or the computer that I use for school, and unplugging is a process. I’ve never been a deliberately simple person, so that was a “Whoa, cool!” moment for me. I can live a very satisfied life that doesn’t revolve around the constant input of digital shit. It wasn’t that we weren’t inputting – we were reading, we were watching, we were listening. I didn’t think once about Netflix or social media, and it was really nice to be in that spot.

Travel doesn’t guarantee that you’ll get out of your rhythm, but it offers you the chance to. We rode around in the classic cars, we played soccer in the streets, I got food poisoning and wondered if I was going to die. I feel like I came back a much keener observer. Oh! I went into this record store trying to find House music and the guy behind the counter went, “Ibiza?! Ibiza?! [makes sound imitating electronic music] Ooon-tss, ooon-tss?!” It was beautiful! I thought he was going to let me look at what he had, but he just made me a burned CD of all this random House music and sent me on my way. [laughs] Cyle Talley is taking a two-strike approach to life. If you’d like to email him, do so at cyle@cyletalley.com

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