What If?

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art entertainment food drink music nightlife Thursday, July 20, 2017

DGO

FREE!

We researched progressive small towns and cities across the country, then brainstormed six ideas that might work here

WHAT IF?

dgomag.com

Also: Love and “Grand Theft Auto,” Kayla Shaggy: Winner of DAC’s juried exhibit, beer label trends, and a tincture recipe you have to try


Donald Trump is ...

CHILD LECTURER!

A video series about what happens when you take Donald Trump’s exact words and make him sound like a child, set in a world of stop-motion animation.

DGO Watch at dgomag.com/videos 2 | Thursday, July 20, 2017  •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••


DGO Magazine

STAFF

What’s inside Volume 2 Number 39

July 20, 2017

Chief Executive Officer

6 A Durango artist with a dark aesthetic

Douglas Bennett V.P. of Advertising

Kayla Shaggy drew a gianormo, Bosch-inspired, intensely-detailed picture of Hell that took grand prize in the 41st Annual Juried Exhibit at the DAC. We sat down with Shaggy to discuss her art and fabulously creepy obsessions.

David Habrat V.P. of Marketing Kricket Lewis Founding Editors Amy Maestas David Holub Editor/ creative director David Holub 375-4551 Patty Templeton Contributors Katie Cahill Christopher Gallagher Alexi Grojean Meggie J Bryant Liggett Jon E. Lynch

»»  Kayla Shaggy’s copper plate print “La Lorona.”

11 Make this tincture now

Cyle Talley Advertising 247-3504 Reader Services 375-4570

DGO is a free weekly publication distributed by Ballantine Communications Inc., and is available for one copy per person. Taking more than five copies of an edition from a distribution location is illegal and is punishable by law according to Colorado Revised Statute 18-9-314.

Love it or Hate it

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Pages

8

Sound

Downtown Lowdown

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Album Reviews 9

17 Weed

When Robert Alan Wendeborn looks at cans and bottles today, he still sees a lot of throwback to the labeling of yesteryear, but beyond that, he sees a few prominent trends.

ptempleton@bcimedia.com

Robert Alan Wendeborn

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16 Vintage News

11 To judge a beer by its bottle?

Staff writer

Cooper Stapleton

From the Editor

10 Beer

dholub@bcimedia.com

Brett Massé

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5

Falling in love while playing ‘Grand Theft Auto’ “Jazzzkat” and “Doughnut98” probably chewed on questions of love, questions no one playing a heist job in “Grand Theft Auto IV” had even been remotely close to considering. But they would ask those questions eventually, laying the brickwork for a complex scaffolding they would never finish, but always be tending to.

Seeing Through the Smoke 17

18 Savage Love 19 Happening 20 DGO Deals 22 Horoscope/ puzzles 23 First Person

“If there is one thing I would strongly recommend you use your cannabis crop for, it is glycerin tincture.”

/dgomag

/dgomag @dgo_mag

ON THE COVER The only thing more slick to ride on than snow is paint. David Holub/DGO

Tell us what you think! Got something on your mind? Have a joke or a story idea or just something that the world needs to know? Send everything to editor@dgomag.com

DGO Magazine is published by Ballantine Communications Inc., P.O. Drawer A, Durango, CO 81302

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@dg

dg


[CTRL-A]

[ love it or hate it ]

David Holub |DGO editor

Showering Love it

Perhaps it’s time I rise above my fear of passing out and go see the doctor

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won’t tell you how long it’s been since I’ve been to the doctor. Let’s just say you’d be disappointed if you knew. I’m afraid that if I go, no matter what I go in for, they’ll find something in addition. Like when you take your car in for an oil change and walk out being suckered into replacing your brake pads and alternator and timing belt. I’m afraid they’ll take an inventory of everything I currently put in my body, note the amount and types of exercise I get, and even call up my Netflix history ... then tell me to do the opposite. I’m afraid if I go, they’ll chastise me for not having gone for so long, noticeably sighing as they thumb through page after page of my pathetic health questionnaire. But the biggest reason I don’t go is because of a bad experience 20 years ago that has since caused apprehension about the medical world at large. I was reminded of all this last week when I went in to get vaccines for an impending trip to Nicaragua. It was a procedure that involved two arms, two needles, and a litany of caution for the nurse about why I may or may not pass out. We’re friends so she mainly just chuckled at my predicament – rightly. The most relevant story I relayed was from when I was 17 or so. I went in for vaccines before I went to college, and the last thing I recalled before coming to with a doctor in my face was the nurse sticking me with the MMR vaccine, saying “Whoops!” and then feeling the muscle in my upper arm tense and buckle. “Whatever you do,” I told my friend last week, “don’t say ‘Whoops!’” For a time as a young man, I couldn’t seem to go to a doctor’s office or encounter anything medically graphic without passing out. The first time I ever passed out I was 14. I awoke sick one day and passed out cold while standing in the bathroom. Later, the doctor prescribed a steroid, which made me break out in hives and pass out again in the medical center parking lot, prompting an ambulance ride to the hospital (during which the ambulance driver blasted Great White’s “Twice Shy” and sang along rather enthusiastically). For the next 15 years, I would faint regularly. There was the time I blacked out in the high school auditorium while watching some who-knows-why motivational speech in which the horrific-accident-surviving

speaker showed gruesome photos of the insides of his ripped-to-shreds leg. There was the emasculating time I passed out watching my high school girlfriend get stitches removed from her elbow. Once, I slammed my middle finger in a heavy hotel room door after forgetting an item in my room. Delirious, I made it into the elevator, went down six floors, stumbled into my friend’s car, batted at the air conditioning, and then blacked out for five to seven minutes. My friend thought I was joking because I was sitting contorted with my eyes open. She knew it was real – or that I deserved an Oscar – when a lone tear rolled out of my open left eye. There was the time a friend had broken his wrist falling off a ladder, and during his gruesome retelling of how it happened and what his mangled wrist had looked like, I passed out in the chair across from him, too polite to change the subject. A year later, I blacked out for about eight minutes in a darkened theater during a particularly horrific scene of “The Wrestler.” It was the scene where he pulls staples from his forehead after wrestling a sadistic, Hillbilly Jim-type opponent. A few years later, I passed out after a friend took a fall in my house and broke her wrist. For some reason, I thought I should feel the wrist to see if there was a noticeable fracture, a misguided action that sent me slumped to the ground, propped against the wall with my eyes hauntingly agape. That was about seven years ago and I haven’t passed out since, though I’ve gotten close. These days, I know my triggers and will not hesitate to walk away from a conversation if people don’t take my threats of passing out seriously. I didn’t pass out last week getting vaccines, despite my apprehension going in (well done, nurse friend). The only time I got close was after the shots had long been administered, my nurse friend couldn’t help pointing out how some people feel the shots going all the way down the nerves in their arms. “Why would you say that right now?” I demanded, woozy. But that marks at least the third straight time I’ve had needles in me without passing out. Maybe it’s time I lay my long-running irrational medical fears to rest and finally go get chastised by a doctor.

Go on all you want about how excessive showering strips your body of invaluable oils. And how it wastes precious water and the resources needed to heat it. I’d say I care, but I don’t. I had a friend in college who stopped showering regularly, claiming that the human body produced its own natural deodorant. He smelled like a barnyard. I love showering because I have irrational fears about smelling foul. If I ever smell a bad odor, I automatically assume it’s me. Drive past a feedlot? Must be me. Burn out my brakes going down Wolf Creek Pass? Must be time to change my drawers. Microwave some borscht for lunch? I may be awash in a coat of stench. There’s only one way to remedy this: Showering. I love the steam, the guaranteed warm up or cool down, the morning wakeup, and the time to ponder life before I’ve started my day. In fact, I can’t even call it a day unless, and until, I’ve showered. —— David Holub

Hate it Showering, I hate it. The only time I like water cloaking my naked form is when I’m running through ocean surf worshipping poetry and chaos with roguish authors, which happens more than you’d think when visiting the state of Rhode Island. But showers? No. I hate showers. The average American shower lasts about 8.2 minutes. In that time, about 17 gallons of water goes down the drain. That’s about 1.2 trillion gallons of water in America alone. In addition to being a magnificent waste of water in a time when 1 in 10 people on this earth still drink from an unprotected water source, I don’t like the fact that it feels like a waste of time. I try to maximize my shower time. If I have to do this dumb cleaning routine, I’m going to sip my tea and learn basic French while I do it, or, at the very least, listen to music. Also, to be vain, I most definitely do not look like Phoebe Cates in “Fast Times at Ridgemont High, when I’m drenched. Granted, she’s exiting a pool, but still, completely wet, she looks like a slick-haired goddess. Totally wet, I look like a curmudgeonly rat woman. I’m sure that’s only gonna get prettier as I age. Showers can suck it. I’ll keep that 17 gallons worth of water for my coffee, please and thank you. —— Patty Templeton

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[gaming]

Extra Life | Brett Massé

Confused and falling in love while playing ‘Grand Theft Auto’

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re you in love? If your answer is yes, can you tell me how you know? Can you describe the point where it turns into being in love rather than something else? Think about it for a while because I’m confident your immediate answers will scarcely compare to your answer if you chew on it a little longer. I think “Jazzzkat” and “Doughnut98” probably chewed on it for a long time. I’m sure they weren’t even consciously aware of those questions when they first met on that heist job in 2010. I’m sure no one playing a heist job in “Grand Theft Auto IV” had even been remotely close to considering such questions as they sped through the city and down to the dockyards, guns at the ready, shoulders tense and hands clenched. But they would ask those questions eventually, laying the brickwork for a complex scaffolding they would never finish, but always be tending to. Jazzzkat and Doughnut98 were both college students separated by only a couple years in age and 5,245 miles. Doughnut was studying accounting and business in England but seldom went to class due to some crippling shyness and a pension for long stretches of gaming at home. Jazzzkat was floating through degrees and found the anthropology degree program to be comfortable enough. Though, at a certain point, escaping the confines of reality had become far more appealing. That and, strangely, shooting up some barge filled with Russian gangsters with a handful of strangers along with this “Doughnut” guy. Frequently, we decide our actions with a loose sense of cause and effect. Sometimes, we orchestrate our circumstances such that we’ll be happy or at least content with the results. Occasionally, we completely lose control of our feelings and take wild stabs in the dark at what can only marginally be classified as “ra-

Alexi Grojean/Special to DGO

tional behavior.” Gripping tightly to any outcome usually makes the situation more extreme. It is an exhausting, dizzying, frightening, tasty, and wonderful experience of the human condition. I hope you go through it soon, ever, often. Online multiplayer in many games can be an unruly, foul bitch of an experience, rife with trolls, griefers, and other exciting flavors of scum and villainy. Online multiplayer in “GTA” is definitely no exception. A prime specimen, actually. Now, I’m not saying it will always be a wretched time, but I never would have imagined it as a place for two lovely people to fall in love. I’ve ran successful heist operations, burgled some banks, raced across the city, and leapt from a helicopter into a backyard pool, but I had never witnessed anything like a life-changing occurrence catalyze in a different reality. In the case between Jazzzkat and

Doughnut98, they were wholly unprepared for falling in love. They did what anyone has the impulse to do, and that was proceed to behave in a manner that suggested they didn’t have these confusing feelings for one another. And would keep playing at odd hours for long hours. And occasionally skip classes. And get awful sleep. Ignore piling dishes. Neglect laundry. Stare at the screen. Stare at the ceiling. Stare out the window. Wondering. It was pretty strongly headed in one direction from the start. You may feel like I did at the time and just want them to figure it out and see them make it work. But they were confronted with a lot of “““rational””” reasons like school, distance, and money. You’ll appreciate the quotation marks around “rational” when I tell you that one of the biggest reasons for their confusion was the fact they were both men who had never really been confront-

ed by their own sexuality before. I’ve looked, but so far, there isn’t a rulebook on that or in-game tutorial with floating arrows and dialogue options. Maybe someday. Probably never. Whatever it ended up costing them, I was happy to learn that Jazzzkat had moved to England by the time I met them again – in-game – a couple years later. By then, an addition to “GTA IV” had come out called “The Ballad of Gay Tony,” which I can only now, upon writing this, appreciate how fitting that was. We were enjoying some base jumping and reckless shenanigans when they told me. They were still figuring a lot of it out. They were still asking a lot of questions. They still probably don’t have answers to all of them. I’m usually suspicious of people that do. Brett Massé is currently playing “STRAFE” by Pixel Titans

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[visual]

KAYLA SHAGGY:

A DURANGO ARTIST WITH

A DARK AESTHETIC »» An interview with the winner of the DAC’s 41st Annual Juried Exhibit Kayla Shaggy drew a gianormo, Bosch-inspired, intensely-detailed picture of Hell that took grand prize in the 41st Annual Juried Exhibit at the Durango Arts Center in June. It’s a meticulous depiction of devils, devastation, and distress that DGO quite admires. We have a thing for centipedes that have human hands for legs – no idea how Shaggy knew that. You can see Shaggy’s award-winning “Hell” drawing and the rest of the Durango Art Center’s Juried Exhibit until Saturday, July 29. DGO sat down with Shaggy to discuss her art and fabulously creepy obsessions. Tell us about your aesthetic. I really like dark stuff. I’ve always really liked how the origins of fairy tales were dark. Like the Brothers Grimm or the violence of folktales and stories from all over the world. I think there’s this one story I heard where this girl is trying to save her brothers and she had to unlock a door and her pinky was the key. So her pinky was torn off. Stuff like that. I like creepy stuff. Shaggy

How do you describe your work to people? I guess sometimes I tell people it can be scary. It doesn’t come off as scary to me, but sometimes I feel like I have to put in a warning beforehand to people. Also, there’s lots of mark-making and I mostly focus on black and white ... Line work’s the most consistent element to my work.

I would look at the piece to try and figure out what it was about.

»»  Kayla Shaggy’s drawing “Hell.” I think when most people go into galleries, they feel like they There’s also this genre called Ero guro. It’s erotic need to know things prior, before going in. They think, nonsense. I like creepy, out-there stuff. “I don’t know what this is about!” People who aren’t Is it macabre erotica? familiar with art history or iconography, it can be intimidating. Sometimes it’s sexual or sometimes it can be really depraved. It can vary. There’s this artist called ShinI want all sorts of people to look at my art – kids, taro Kago who is super famous right now. He makes older people, people my age – and I don’t want to artwork for a lot of bands. A lot of his stuff combines strictly tell someone what my art is about. I want something that is beautiful or cute with something them to be able to look at a piece and be encouraged that is really gross and ugly – that juxtaposition. to interpret their own story through it. I think you can kinda see that influence in the “Hell” What artist storytellers do you adore? drawing. I’ve had some people say some of the monI really like Picasso and Hieronymus Bosch. sters are cute, or how the little people are adorable Bosch is a big inspiration for the “Hell” piece. He until you realize that they are being torn apart. was doing so much weird stuff and people were like, Do you like to work in large scale? “What are you doing?” They still ask that about Bosch. The “Hell” artwork took 35 hours. I did it over a There’s so many tiny details in his work and I always series of three weeks. I love doing tiny details, and have fun looking it. doing a huge artwork was challenging ... I want to do I really like a lot of Renaissance artists and artists another big drawing, maybe even bigger. that use religious themes. There’s a lot of comic book

How do you want people to view your art?

artists I fall into.

Growing up, I always had fun going to art galleries and looking at artwork. Before I looked at the title,

There’s one in Japan, Kentaro Miura. He draws (the manga) “Berserk.”

Like who?

Does music factor into your work? Yeah. I like listening to music while I work. To get into the mood for the “Hell” drawing, I was listening to all my favorite heavy metal bands.

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[pages] White Rabbit book review: “Stranger in the Woods: The Extraordinary Story of the Last True Hermit,” by Michael Finkel

The North Pond Hermit eludes capture Many of us dream of kissing the chaos of modern civilization goodbye, yet most never do. “The Stranger in the Woods: The Extraordinary Story of the Last True Hermit,” by Michael Finkel, details the experiences of one such recluse. In 1986, Christopher Knight, a shy and inquisitive kid from a loving family, disappeared into the Maine woods for 27 years, seen only once in that time by an unsuspecting group of hikers.

Like who? There was Metallica. I like Cannibal Corpse, Chiodos, Coheed and Cambria, Slayer. What other geek-out influences do you have? I like bugs. I think they’re really cute, but lots of people are really terrified of them. So it ends up in a drawing somehow. Like in the “Hell” drawing, there’s a giant centipede that people did not like. I really love horror movies. There haven’t been many recently that I really liked. “The Witch” was good. Anything that is horror or spooky or scary, I always want to hear more about. What horror movies would you recommend? “The Thing” (1982 edition). The practical effects are so gross and amazing and everything goes to shit

so quick in that movie and it’s just really great to see. And, there’s this old zombie movie where this guy is being eaten and all the zombies are pulling on him. One zombie’s grabbing the guy’s head and he’s screaming and you could see his vocal cords tearing as his voice got more high pitched until (makes squish noise). It was “Day of the Dead.” I love monsters. Monster movies excite me. I like researching why people are scared of what they’re scared of, then using that in my work. For more on Kayla Shaggy’s work, visit her website, https://www.kaylashaggy. gallery. This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity. —— Patty Templeton DGO Staff Writer

During his disappearance, Knight became the stuff of legend. He relied on his wits and burgled supplies from seasonal cottages to survive brutal winters in his trusty tent. “The North Pond Hermit,” as he became known, was feared by some and cheered by others, as he continued to elude attempts of capture. Author Michael Finkel extensively interviewed Knight after he was finally arrested and imprisoned for more than a thousand counts of burglary. This is the story of a man who was determined to

march to his own drum and who won the hearts of many in the process. If you’re a sucker for tales of survival and solitude, then “The Stranger in the Woods” is definitely worth a read. — Keena Kimmel Owner of White Rabbit Book and Curiosities

(Paperback) »»The Woman in Cabin 10, by Ruth Ware (Paperback)

weekly bestsellers July 9-15 »»The Land of Stories: Worlds Collide, by Chris Colfer (Hardcover) »»News of the World, by Paulette Jiles (Paperback) »»Open Midnight: Where Ancestors and Wilderness Meet, by Brooke Williams (Paperback) »»Milk and Honey, by Rupi Kaur

»»Chester and Gus, by Cammie McGovern (Hardcover) »»The Alchemist, by Paulo Coelho (Paperback) »»All the Light We Cannot See, by Anthony Doerr (Paperback) »»On Tyranny: Twenty Lessons from the Twentieth Century, by Timothy Snyder (Paperback) »»A Gentleman In Moscow, by Amor Towles (Hardcover)

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[sound]

Downtown Lowdown | Bryant Liggett

Grushkin’s foot-stomping album is 30 years in the works

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young Jonas Grushkin played piano because of the drums. When he was a kid, the New Jersey native first picked up a pair of drumsticks, right about the time he expressed interest in piano; after one piano lesson, a lesson that Grushkin describes as a “rocky start,” he decided he’d have to teach himself. “I’ve always loved to bang on things, djembes and congas,” said Grushkin. “My dad had a pair of drumsticks, and hearing him do his drumroll, I mimicked that and started doing that on the piano. I would do my left hand, my right hand, and suddenly with my foot going it was just so much fun to sit and compose this kind of stuff. It wasn’t musically notes and such, it was just stuff I had heard in my head. It was rhythms.” The result is an original, foot-stomping piano product. You’ve seen him around Durango. Maybe as a handyman around the Durango Arts Center, or working for the school district, or working »»  Jonas Grushkin for various construction or landscaping companies. PerBryant’s best haps you’ve seen him with a Thursday: Sunny and the camera in hand at Fort Lewis Whiskey Machine, 5:30 p.m. No College events. Fans of the cover. Ska Brewing, 225 Girard Grateful Dead have seen his St. in Bodo Park. Information: photos, as he was the official 247-5792. Grateful Dead photographer Monday: Matisyahu plays for years, releasing the “The reggae, hip-hop. 9 p.m. $35. Official Book of the DeadAnimas City Theatre, 128 E. heads,” a collection of photos College Drive. Information: and anecdotes from Grateful 799-2281. Dead fans published in 1983. Or you’ve heard him play piano at various events around town. He just released his debut CD, “Gemini,” rethe music has really fed my inspirations,” said Grushkin. “A lot of these tunes on ‘Gemini’ go corded at Scooters Place with Scott Smith here in back 20 or 30 years, just ideas that had been floatDurango. It features a dozen original tracks and assistance on some tunes from bass player Victor ing in my head and they came to fruition on this. I Wooten, and local musicians Bob Hemenger and was inspired by the help of a sax player in Pagosa Jeff Solon. Springs, the great Bob Hemenger. He’s such a soul“‘Gemini’ is really going back to my roots in ful player, and when he heard a couple of these music. I’m a self-taught musician, and I’ve been tunes, he said, ‘Jonas, we got to do something with a professional photographer most of my life, but these.’”

The album hits on a lot of genres; there’s an ambient and atmospheric feel in “Adrift” and “Aurora,” while “Slippery Blues” and “‘Smokey Times” are a nice dose of blues, ripe for a dimly-lit tavern. But cuts like “Firecrackers” and “‘Downshift” really shine and showcase the fact that Grushkin is a rock ’n’ roll player. The ivory isn’t being tickled as much as it’s being thumped; Grushkin is a percussive piano player, and the result is a display of top-notch original music. His inspirations are great company: Count Basie, Leon Russell, and Keith Emerson have all rubbed off on his playing in the best of ways. “I called it ‘Gemini’ because it really does show Gemini, the yin and yang, the black and white, the two sides of me,” said Grushkin. “It’s a smattering of ideas from slow, soulful things, to just in-yourface, kick-butt, New Orleans stomps.” Grushkin plays occasionally around town, and is currently putting a band in the works for future musical endeavors. Bryant Liggett is a freelance writer and KDUR station manager. liggett_b@fortlewis.edu.

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[sound] What’s new Avey Tare,“Eucalyptus” Available: Friday, July 21, via the Domino Recording Company on compact disc, or if purchased direct from the label, a deluxe double LP on 180-gram vinyl featuring Stoughton tip-on gatefold jacket, a 16-page 11-by-11-inch lyric booklet featuring artwork by Paige Cleveland of Rule of Three Studio and a download of the album, available in various formats. As of late, the band of musicians originally collected in Baltimore, Maryland, and now flung to the various reaches of the globe known as Animal Collective have made sonic art that is either hit or miss for me. It would seem a few things have become apparent since first coming across their records

New at

July 21 Wintersun,“Forest Seasons” In 2004, Wintersun released its self-titled record, a revelation of folk and prog metal. For the next eight years, they promised us “Time,” an album to end all albums. After years of delays, they finally released “Time 1” in 2012, supposedly the first half of the aforementioned “Time.” It was wonderful, but it was half an album. Now, five years later, we are given “Forest Seasons,” which has nothing to do with “Time.” As a big fan, I gotta say I’m frustrated but excited. Wintersun makes absolutely wonderful music, and I cannot disregard anything they do because of that. But seriously, give me “Time 2.” No one has heard any full tracks from “Forest Seasons” yet, but over the years we have gotten snippets, which show their same orchestral approach to folk metal, with a lot of grand solos, and even some pure black metal moments. It’s gonna be good. But I haven’t forgotten about “Time 2.” Tyler The Creator,“Scum Fuck Flower Boy” I have been an Odd Future guy since they first dropped in 2008, with interest waning after the group started releasing records independently. Tyler’s solo output has been solid, and I think

on the airwaves of various college radio stations in the early aughts. One, what seemed to me as an acid-soaked exploration into sound, textures, and the inter-weaving of arthouse live instrumentation and electronic soundscapes, beats, and meanderings was best realized when the band, made of up the parts Panda Bear (Noah Lennox), Deakin (Josh Dibb), Geologist (Brian Weitz) and Avey Tare (David Portner) worked as a whole.

SFFB is the culmination of what he has been trying to do sonically for a long time. As far as I can tell, the man did all the production throughout the record, which keeps his gnarly, jangly, cavernous beat style – punctuated with some warm and warbly synth lines – from getting too intense. Lyrically, it has some nice callbacks to earlier material, which had the conceit based around a therapist session. SFFB is reminiscent, in that the lyrics are introspective and bombastic, with his trademark baritone sometimes taking a backseat to a surprisingly good singing voice.

Two, this sort of approach to music has (to be expected within these times we live) spawned countless sub-par imitators that have never quite achieved the level of cohesion as the Collective. And finally, as far as “solo” outings go from the members of Animal Collective, Panda Bear may no longer be my preferred taste. OK, he still might be, but Avey Tare is closing the gap on this, his second proper full-length under this particular moniker. The sprawling hour-

bix, Tau Cross make an excellent brand of mid-tempo crust punk/straight-up heavy metal. Imagine Motorhead embracing their punk roots, or Killing Joke with more street cred. The track “Bread and Circuses” was the highlight

plus double LP has all the markings of an Animal Collective associated record, with dense layers of varying styles. The album features vocal contributions from Angel Deradoorian (of Slasher Flicks & Dirty Projectors), Eyvind Kang, Jessika Kenney, and Susan Alcorn, along with production help from none other than bandmate Deakin. Expect this offering to rate on many year-end lists of the artier-leaning critics. Recommended for fans of Animal Collective, Avey Tare’s Slasher Flicks, Panda Bear, Ariel Pink’s Haunted Graffiti, Dan Deacon, Yeasayer, or Dirty Projectors —— Jon E. Lynch KDUR_PD@fortlewis.edu

for me, with Rob bellowing “There are monsters we must defeat,” punctuated by driving drums and simple but marvelously effective guitar work. —— Cooper Stapleton

Lana Del Rey,“Lust for Life” Fresh off of the release of “Honeymoon” a little less than two years ago, the music world’s current favorite whispy-voiced sad girl, Lana Del Rey, is dropping her fifth record, “Lust for Life.” She has always been one of those artists who appeals to me on paper, yet has never caught my attention on record. This one has a similar end result, but overall, I enjoyed my time with “Lust for Life.” The tracks where she is on her own with a sparse electronic backing are wonderful. I do not vibe with the juxtaposed Playboi Carti, Weeknd, or ASAP Rocky guest spots. Weeknd fares better than the rest, but I find myself hoping for Lana on her own, waxing poetic over something cold and sad rather than out-of-place rap MCs. Tau Cross,“Pillar of Fire” There aren’t a lot of bands that sound like Tau Cross anymore. Formed by Rob Miller of seminal crust punk band Ame-

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[beer]

First Draughts | Robert Alan Wendeborn

To judge a beer by its bottle?: Current trends in labeling

O

ne of the interesting things about beer is that since beer began to be packaged and moved around, we start seeing how important a brand can be. Starting in the mid 1800s with saloons and public houses that were dedicated to selling specific brands of beer, we see signage for these beer brands. As bottling technology, and later canning, caught up with beer production and transportation technologies, you start seeing branding on bottles and cans. Early cans and bottles were all pretty similar: simple palettes of text-dominated branding. Occasionally, there was the throwback to medieval coats of arms. Maybe an eagle, a mountain, an old wooden ship or its captain, a stag, a waterfall, an Indian in

a headdress. Beers either tied themselves to where they were made (Old Milwaukee, Olympia, Lone Star, Rainier), where they tie their roots (National Bohemian, Budweiser, Old German), or who owned the brewery (Coors, Busch, Schlitz, Pabst). Pretty straightforward stuff. Except maybe Falstaff, which had some truly bizarre labeling for the time: all black and white, the words “Beer” or “Light Beer” on the opposite side of their main logo, or even a memo encouraging the consumer to write their elected officials about buying American-made goods. Craft beer has its own trajectory. Initially, it mimicked the more classic labels and naming traditions: Sierra Nevada, Anchor Brewing, Boston Beer, Bell’s Brewing, Widmer Brothers. And they had very similar branding. Today’s brewers are doing things that are way beyond all of this, taking can and bottle labeling into

the art world. When I look at cans and bottles today, I still see a lot of throwback to the labeling of yesteryear, but beyond that, I see a few prominent trends. The

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most annoying is probably the interchangeable label. It’s all the same, but with a slightly different color and with a small change in the copy. This is Upslope, Red Hook, Marble. It’s simple and clean and easy brand identity, but it’s also simple and easy. Beyond this big trend of the interchangeable label is the one-color labels, like The Alchemist’s beers. Always black on silver, the art changes, but the brand’s identity is tied to that simple black-onsilver design. Oskar Blues does similar stuff, such

as its Ten Fiddy and Pinner brands being one or two color with the sheen of polished aluminum shining through. This is a signature of Upslope as well. A truly contemporary trend is the use of comic book style art and characters. Ska probably started this trend, but you can see it everywhere now: Odd 13 Brewing, Southern Prohibition, Three Floyds all use the characters to build a story for their breweries and tell a story to consumers. This extends to their other marketing and into their taprooms themselves.

Along the same lines is the use of a single, prominent artist to create labels and art for the brewery. Flying Dog Brewery’s connection to Ralph Steadman is perhaps the best example of this. Steadman is best known for his illustrations of Hunter S. Thompson’s works and he’s been doing the art for Flying Dog’s labels since the start. When you see a Flying Dog bottle, it is unmistakably Flying Dog. Along the same lines is Colin Healey at Prairie Artisan Ales, which also stands out and is unmistakable on a shelf. A contemporary trend that puts a modern spin on the older styles is the text-only cans. Austin Beerworks, Wild Heaven Beer, and Lord Hobo are prominent examples. My favorite of the bunch is Wild Heaven Beer’s Emergency Drinking Beer, which is a mix between a pilsner and a gose and is in a bright yellow can, with the words “Emergency Drinking Beer” in black. The black and yellow and pretty funny name really make it pop. As the craft market gets more and more crowded, the variety and styles of label art is going to increase. There’s already some really wacky stuff on the shelf and it’s probably a good idea to keep your phone handy so you don’t judge a beer by its bottle. Robert Alan Wendeborn is a former cellar operator at Ska Brewing and current lead cellar operator at Tin Roof Brewing in Baton Rouge, Louisiana.

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6

IDEAS TO MAKE

DURANGO EVEN BETTER

By Patty Templeton DGO STAFF WRITER

»» We

researched progressive small towns and cities across the country. Here are six ideas that could work here

D

urango – We are a gorgeous gathering of about 18,000 people nestled in the San Juans. We consistently maintain a presence on “best small towns in America” lists. And why not? We have an active art scene, outdoor living, a charming downtown, an engaged populace, more restaurants per capita than San Francisco, and the Durango & Silverton Narrow Gauge Railroad whistling living history through the streets. Durango’s population is set to double by 2040, and the city manager and City Council have specific goals to support that growth. Goals like building a resilient economic future, fostering community, and creating districts that embrace Durango’s unique character. DGO got to wondering: Over the next 20 years, what can we do to collectively build and brand Durango for locals, in addition to the transient tourist population? We researched what infrastructure and entertainment concepts brought economic success and innovation to other population-compa-

rable towns, and did a little daydreaming for what else could be possible in Durango. This is not an article about fundraising, cost allocation, taxes, land allotment, or the years of committees that go into firming out these sorts of town-defining projects. This is an exercise in convivial, creative conceptualizing. Because who doesn’t just love good conversations deliberating bold futures?

What we could implement that other small towns have A large, permanent, outdoor venue Currently, Durango does not have a permanent, multi-use, outdoor space for concert and movie viewings. We come close with stage assembly in Buckley Park and Rotary Park’s gazebo and green lawn. With a mind toward contemporary infrastructure, Durango could battle Telluride for Southwest Colorado’s festival culture. We could build the simple, outdoor venue that people from Albuquerque or Santa Fe would Continued on Page 14

»»  Loveland Feed and Grain building (left), before being restored as part of the Loveland ArtSpace project, shown above in 2015. Photo by Greg Handberg/Courtesy of Colorado Creative Industries (left); Helen H. Richardson/The Denver Post

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[ideas] From Page 13

be willing to drive four hours to when they’re not willing to drive six to Telluride. We could strengthen existing festivals in Durango by building a space for inevitably larger crowds. Rocket Drive-In’s closing proved that an outdoor movie venue could not survive in Durango by itself. But if that drive-in was also a concert venue and party space? Sounds like the Ballroom Marfa, a successful, future-forward, outdoor venue in Marfa, Texas, an arts town of less than 2,000 people. Can you imagine what we could do with a multi-function outdoor venue? How about partnering with the Durango Independent Film Festival or Animas City Theatre to host themed movie marathons with musical interludes? What about a juried art show sponsored by the Durango Arts Center with art projections spanning a drive-in screen? What about expanding the Bluegrass Meltdown with documentary interludes?

A food festival on a regional dish or ingredient The Taste of Durango is fantastic, but how about we throw down a new food fest in town? What we’re talking is a free-admission fest that had 20-plus booths of vendors slinging delicious dishes based on the same ingredient. Whiting, Indiana, has Pierogi Fest. Centerville, Tenn., puts on the National Banana Pudding Festival. Since 1973, Irmo, S.C., has hosted the Okra Strut. What if Durango had a green chile festival? DGO wouldn’t mind trying green chile ice cream, green chile pancakes, green chile everything. Or a food festival that emphasized craft beer as a cooking ingredient in desserts? What about a rhubarb festival? DGO can see it now ... deep fried rhubarb cobbler on a stick.

An extensive artist-assistance program For the first time, Durango is incorporating arts and culture into its comprehensive city plan. This is a positive development considering that, though Durango has a thriving art scene, many of its artists are priced-out of living within city limits. It’s time to support the artists who bring personality and deep aesthetics to Durango. There are existing programs we can partner with, like Space to Create Colorado, a state-driven initiative to provide affordable live/work spaces for artists. Bisbee, Ariz., created the Central School Project, which strives to provide affordable workspace to artists while acting as a town cultural center. Collinwood, Ohio, created affordable homeownership for working artists in addition to grants for active art projects. Oil City, Pa., does the same. Paducah, Kentucky’s Artist Relocation Program is in its 17th year and has seen great success in providing affordable live and work space to

Flickr

»»  From Ballroom Marfa in Marfa, Texas.

What Durango already has or had that we can amp up A town currency We’ve all done it – bought something online that could’ve been bought in town. When you don’t shop local, you don’t support the local sales tax. Sales tax, in strong part, pays for services like road maintenance and staffing the library, and having a town currency can encourage people to shop Associated Press file local. »»  Berkshares, a local currency used in several western Massachusetts communities, sits Durango has tried a alongside U.S. dollars in a cash draw at the Berkshire Co-op Market in Great Barrington, Mass. town currency; through autumn of 2016, we had “Durango Dollars.” artists who help to reinvent and a revitalize their People could buy a gift card from the Chamber of downtown. Commerce and that gift card could be used at any With a few tweaks to how it houses, supports and business in town. Unfortunately, Durango Dollars celebrates writers, musicians, visual artists, and ended. other creatives, Durango could become a nationally Perhaps, we can try the currency program again acclaimed, contemporary arts mecca. Continued on Page 15

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[ideas] From Page 14

after contacting towns like Traverse City, Mich., Salt Spring Island, British Columbia, Ithaca, N.Y., and Great Barrington, Mass., to see how and why their shop-local programs worked. Maybe we can appeal to the provincial and tourist markets by creating a limited edition, yearly changing currency bought at a discounted rate that features local, professional artists’ images of the Old West sponsored by Durango businesses. We could create a currency that also acted as a collectible souvenir bought not only at the out-of-the-way Chamber of Commerce, but in the historic district.

Adding extravagance to the Animas River Trail The Animas River Trail (ART) is a gorgeous example of riverfront reclamation that enhances a town for locals and draws tourists. Vending is not allowed along the ART and events that occur along the trail are permitted and held in adjacent city parks. Our river walk is fabulous, but what if it had seasonal festivals? What if there was a food cart fest? The First Saturday Art Walk in Gig Harbor, Wash., showcases a riverfront used to build creative community and commerce. What about something like the Animas River Trail Jazz Walk? Spaciously placed jazz groups could play the trail from noon to twilight one weekend a year. Or if parts of the ART were turned into “haunted” areas in October or became a romantic “lovers walk” for Valentine’s Day? What if the ART partnered with the Durango Arts Center to create a performance art festival along the Animas River or 20 Moons Dance Theatre used the riverfront as a venue?

An uber-specific fall festival Durango has a few fabulous fall festivals, like the Annual Durango Autumn Arts Festival, a beer-centric Oktoberfest, and the family-friendly Three Springs Fall Festival. What we don’t have is a festival that embraces autumn with a precision point on the macabre or campy nature of October. For a town (usually) lacking in haunted houses, it’d be nice to have an uber-specific October celebration that could heighten our Google

Courtesy of U.S. Air Force/Chief Master Sgt. Gregory Stone

»»  A scene from the Emma Crawford Coffin Race in Manitou Springs. factor and bring an autumn influx to downtown. For example, St. Charles, Ill., has a scarecrow festival. There’s the Circleville, Wisc., Pumpkin Show which focuses on the largest pumpkins grown in the surrounding states. Manitou Springs holds the Emma Crawford Coffin Race and Parade where nearly 100 people build coffins to race down their main thoroughfare in honor of a woman whose coffin slid down an eroding mountain in the early 1900s. What if we filled Buckley Park with a jack-o-lantern tower so wide and tall it was featured on the Travel Channel? A similar instance has taken place in Laconia, N.H., – which presents 20,000 jack-o-lanterns in a town of only 16,000 people with a festival attendance of 40,000. What if we had a September-built, October-long haunted house-themed art

installation in Buckley?

Now what? These are all ideas. They are spit-balling. They are DGO thinking about what we love in our corner of the Western Slope and how we can capitalize on those characteristics to maximize our fiscal growth and recreational opportunities as the population increases. Bonus about that population increase? It’s more people to further support large-scale, city-wide projects. What ideas do you have? Bring ’em to the city! Bring ’em to us! As Andrew W.K. said, “Life becomes awesome as soon as you decide it does.” You want something in Durango that doesn’t exist? Talk about it, get others involved, and make it happen.

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[democracy] [Vintage News]

Trump “compliments” Brigitte Macron FROM THE FILES OF

News you need to know

Upon meeting Brigitte Macron, wife of French president Emmanuel Macron, Donald Trump found NOT it necessary NORMAL to say, “You’re in such good shape,” and then to her husband, “She’s in such good physical shape. Beautiful.”

»»  A lovely Cortez family enjoys a death trap backyard rocket in the Aug. 2, 1961, Durango Herald.

Why this is not normal A president openly commenting on the form of a woman – whether that woman is a president’s wife or an ordinary American watching a motorcade – is not appropriate.

Jungle gyms of yesteryear would definitely not pass today’s safety regulations

Trump probably thinks that he complimented Brigitte Macron. What he did was take a step away from her to better

view her physique for his own personal pleasure. Trump’s “compliment” was not about making Brigitte Macron feel good, it was about making Trump’s pleasure known. It reduced Brigitte Macron to an object that contented Trump instead of a mind to be engaged with. Imagine this situation in reverse, would it have been at all appropriate for Brigitte Macron to say to Trump, immediately upon meeting, “Oh! You are in such bad shape,” then to turn to Melania and say, “He’s overweight, isn’t he?” Showing pleasure or displeasure at someone’s appearance is not appropriate. It’s especially not normal in a political setting. Triple that not normal when the press is too busy identifying possible Russian collusion connections to properly call out the president for his cat calls. Nearly two thirds of women have experienced street harassment. Now, they can experience it from a sitting U.S. president. —— Patty Templeton DGO Staff Writer

Killer playground equipment Back in my day, we drank razor blades and traversed bear-trapped mountains. We gingerly walked 15 miles on ants made of glass that spilled sulfuric acid when you stepped too hard. All of this to get to a playground that wanted to murder us. This may look like a lovingly-crafted metal rocket made by a Cortez father for his children circa 1961, but it’s not. It’s an example of crippling, sadistic playground fodder. Don’t worry though, those kids, I’m sure they walked it off. Walked off what? First off, anything built before 1978 is bound to have lead paint. Sorry, kiddos, those cute accent colors you sometimes licked or peeled? They poisoned you. Next, the height of that rocket. How many broken wrists, toes, and whatnots occurred falling from that thing? Lastly, there’s no edging whatsoever to the metal windows or door to that monstrosity. I’m sure all the bleeding and that one beheading just built character. —— Patty Templeton DGO Staff Writer

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[ weed ] Seeing Through the Smoke Christopher Gallagher

You should totally use your bud to make tincture. Here’s how

Ingredients »»4 parts vegetable glycerin »»1 part blackberry brandy »»5 parts water (which will be boiled off after allowing the other ingredi-

ents to steep together) »»Enough decarboxylated cannabis to fill the glycerin/brandy mixture before adding the water »»My secret ingredient – 1 can of Mountain Dew Throwback (because the stuff they use to make cake frosting just isn’t quite sweet enough).

Directions Mix ingredients in a pan (note the level before adding water and soda). Bring it up to a low boil; lower heat so that the boil is no longer rolling but there are still bubbles being produced; stir occasionally. When the mixture boils back down to the level in the pan before the addition of the water and the soda, remove it from heat – this should take about two hours; if it is much quicker than that, you did not lower the heat enough, but, fear not, simply add some water to lengthen the process. Strain through cheesecloth, squeezing out all the liquid from the cannabis residue and you are good to go. To make a simple alcohol tincture without heat, pour a quart of high proof alcohol (90 proof and above will work, but 151 or grain will work better) into a mason jar, fill the jar with your weed, and shake it vigorously for about five minutes. Repeat this process every few hours for two days, strain through cheesecloth, and there it is—a tincture that will make your face explode for the first two minutes after ingestion, but will treat you wonderfully for the few hours following. These tinctures are best stored in dark colored bottles to slow degradation and can be fortified with an addition of keif or oil, should you decide you would like a more potent version. If there is one thing I would strongly recommend you use your cannabis crop for, it is glycerin tincture; I hope you follow this advice and I hope it brings you many smiles. Christopher Gallagher lives with his wife and their four dogs and two horses. Life is pretty darn good. Contact him at chrstphrgallagher@gmail.com.

Alexi Grojean/Special to DGO

C

annabis tincture aka Nectar of the Gods aka Happy Juice aka YumYum aka Gimme Some More aka The Pathway to a Lovely Day aka What the Pharmaceutical Industry Wishes They Could Have Created. To my mind, it is more than a lovely verdant liquid with more nicknames than a member of the Wu Tang Clan, it is the single most useful and versatile preparation of our green amiga available out there. I have no idea how it has stayed so under the radar, but, then again, I suppose that’s part of what makes the coolest stuff the coolest stuff. The basics of tincture: It is another extraction, very similar in process and result to the extractions for oil and butter that we have been examining here for the past several weeks, the difference being that tincture is 100 percent ready and good to go all by itself. Just prep it, throw a little vial or bottle in your pocket for the road, and enjoy the mellow waves that will slowly roll over you all day and night (and into the next morning if that’s how you roll). Tincture is designed for sublingual application, which means that it is absorbed directly into the tissues under your tongue – a few drops, about a quarter hour, breathe, smile. But there are reports online (from some of the usual suspects, I’m certain) of its efficacy as an additive to smoked bud, in bowls, joints, and blunts. My basic recipe for glycerin tincture is very simple and involves basic ratios and a bit of heat. It’s the primary one I recommend due to its deliciousness, though I will also give a quick recipe for an alcohol-based version that delivers the same end results after a strong blast of heat straight to your face.

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[love and sex]

Savage Love | Dan Savage

Everything seems great ... I just can’t climax like before I’m a 35-year-old straight woman, recently married, and everything is great. But I have been having problems reaching orgasm. When we first started dating, I had them all the time. It was only after we got engaged that it became an issue. He is not doing anything differently, and he works hard to give me oral pleasure, last longer, and include more foreplay. He’s sexy and attractive and has a great working penis. I am very aroused when we have sex, but I just can’t climax. It is weird because I used to very easily, and still can when I masturbate. I have never been so in love before and I have definitely never been with a man who is so good to me. Honestly, all of my previous boyfriends did not treat me that well, but I never had a problem having orgasms. My husband is willing to do whatever it takes, but it’s been almost a year since I came during vaginal intercourse! Is this just a temporary problem that will fix itself? My Orgasms Are Now Shy “This is a temporary problem that will fix itself,” said Dr. Meredith Chivers, an associate professor of psychology at Queen’s University and a world-renowned sex researcher who has done – and is still doing – groundbreaking work on female sexuality, desire, and arousal. “And here’s why it will fix itself,” said Dr. Chivers. “First, MOANS has enjoyed being orgasmic with her partner and previous partners. Second, even though she’s had a hiatus in orgasms through vaginal intercourse, she is able to have orgasms when masturbating. Third, she describes no concerns with becoming sexually aroused physically and mentally. Fourth, MOANS has a great relationship, has good sexual communication, and is sexually attracted to her partner. Fifth, what she’s experiencing is a completely normal and expected variation in sexual functioning that probably relates to stress.” The orgasms you’re not having right now – orgasms during PIV sex with your husband – the lack of which is causing you stress? Most likely the result of stress, MOANS, so stressing out about the situation will only make the problem worse. “I wonder if the background stress of a big life change – getting married is among the top 10 most stressful life events – might be distracting or anxiety-provoking,” said Dr. Chivers. “Absolutely normal if it were.” Distracting, anxiety-provoking thoughts can also make it harder to come. “Being able to have an orgasm is about giving yourself over to pleasure in the moment,” said Dr. Chivers. “Research on brain activation during orgasm suggests that a key feature is deactivation in parts of the brain associated with emotion and cognitive control. So difficulties reaching orgasm can arise from distracting, anxiety-pro-

voking thoughts that wiggle their way in when you’re really aroused, maybe on the edge, but just can’t seem to make it over. They interfere with that deactivation.” Dr. Chivers’s advice will be familiar to anyone with a daughter under the age of 12: Let it go. “Let go of working toward vaginal orgasm during sex,” Dr. Chivers advised. “Take vaginal orgasm off the table for at least a month – you’re allowed to do other things and come other ways, just not through vaginal-penile intercourse. Instead of working toward the goal of bringing back your vaginal orgasm, enjoy being with your sexy husband and experiment with other ways of sharing pleasure, and if the vaginal orgasms don’t immediately come back, oh well. There are, fortunately, many roads to Rome. Enjoy!” My advice? Buy some stress-busting pot edibles if you’re lucky enough to live in a state that has legalized weed, MOANS, or make your own if you live in a suck-ass state that hasn’t. And tell your husband to stop trying so hard—if his efforts are making you feel guilty, that’s going to be hugely counterproductive. But last word goes to Dr. Chivers: “If your vaginal orgasms don’t return, and you’re unhappy about that, consider connecting with a sex therapist in your area. In the USA, AASECT, the (AASECT.org) is a great resource for finding a therapist or counselor.” Follow Dr. Chivers on Twitter @DrMLChivers. I’m a straight man who recently moved in with a rich, straight friend. He sent me an e-mail before I moved in letting me know he was in a femdom relationship. He was only telling me this, he said, because I might notice “small, subtle rituals meant to reinforce [their] D/s dynamic.” If it bothered me, I shouldn’t move in. Finding an affordable place in Central London is hard, so I told him I didn’t mind. But I do. Their many “rituals” run the gamut from the subtle to the not-so-subtle: He can’t sit on the furniture without her permission, which she grants with a little nod (subtle); when he buzzes her in, he has to wait by the door on his hands and knees and kiss her feet when she enters and keep at it until she tells him to stop (NOT SUBTLE!). She’s normal with me – she doesn’t attempt to order me around – but these “rituals” make me uncomfortable and I worry they’re getting off from my witnessing them. Rituals Often Observed Mortifying In Extreme His apartment, his rules – or her rules, actually. If you don’t want to witness the shit your rich and submissive friend with the great apartment warned you about before you moved in, ROOMIE, you’ll have to move your ass out.

I know a teenager in a theater production who is receiving inappropriate advances from an older member of the cast. Her refusals are met with aggression and threats that he’ll make a scene, ruining the show for everyone. I believe that fear is causing her to follow through with things she isn’t interested in or comfortable with. What advice would you have on how she gets out of this situation? She’s otherwise enjoying the theater experience. Theatrical Harassment Really Enrages Adult Torontonian The awesome band Whitehorse invited me to Toronto to celebrate their new album, “Panther in the Dollhouse,” which features songs inspired by sexworkers-rights activists and – blushing – the Savage Lovecast. (Luke and Melissa and the band rehearsed and played the Savage Lovecast theme live, which was magical.) Anyway, THREAT, I answered your question during the show and I kindasorta jumped down your throat. I thought you were a member of the theater company and an eyewitness – and passive bystander – to this harassment. (“You ask what this kid can do about this,” I recall saying, “but the better question is why haven’t you done something about it?”) But there was nothing in your question to indicate you were an eyewitness and a passive bystander, THREAT, which I didn’t realize until rereading your question after the show. Sigh. I have more time to digest the questions that appear in the column or on the podcast, and my copy editor (peace be upon her) and the tech-savvy at-risk youth live to point out a detail I may have missed or gotten wrong, prompting me to rewrite or rerecord an answer. But I’m on my own at live shows – no copy editor, no TSARY, no net – upping the odds of a screwup. My apologies, THREAT. But even if you’re not an eyewitness, THREAT, there are still a few things you can do. First, keep listening to your friend. In addition to offering her your moral support, encourage her to speak to the director of the play and the artistic director of the theater. This [effing] creep needs to be fired – and if the people running the show are made aware of the situation and don’t act, they need to be held accountable. A detailed Facebook post brought to the attention of the local media should do the trick. Hopefully, it won’t come to that, THREAT, but let me know if it does. Because I’m happy to help make that Facebook post go viral. Dan Savage is a nationally syndicated sex advice columnist writing for The Stranger in Seattle. Contact him at mail@savagelove.net or @fakedansavage on Twitter and listen to his podcast every week at savagelovecast.com.

18 | Thursday, July 20, 2017  • • •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••


[happening]

DGO’s weekend picks in and around Durango

Thursday

Saturday

Southwest Summer Storytelling Series, 1 p.m., Fort

Durango Farmers Market with Hello, Dollface, 8 a.m.,

Lewis College, Center of Southwest Studies, Delaney Library, 1000 Rim Drive, www.fortlewis. edu.

First National Bank of Durango, 259 W. Ninth St., www.durangofarmersmarket.com.

A relaxing evening of screaming

Burger and Band Night: Kirk James Band, 5 p.m., $20,

8:30 a.m., Bayfield Roadside Park, U.S. Highway 160, 884-9544.

Wrap a bandana around your face and get to stomping in a circle: hardcore’s coming to Farmington. Or metal. Or something. Who knows what music genres mean anymore? On Thursday, July 20, I Am Haunted out of Salt Lake City will play at Studio 18, CR 5364 #20, in Farmington. West//Ghost, Heart Museum, and Haddonfield A.D. open.

James Ranch Terraces, 33846 U.S. Highway 550, www.jamesranch. net.

Davis Phinney Parkinson’s Victory Summit, 9 a.m., Fort

Doors at 6 p.m., show at 7 for this $10, all-ages show. More info at https://www.facebook.com/studio18heavymetal.

Journey inward at the ACT Matisyahu is a Jewish-American reggae rocker known for his beatboxing and alt-rock leanings. He made headlines at the beginning of his career for sporting an orthodox Jewish appearance including beard, yarmulke, and locks. Though Matisyahu has chopped his locks, he still looks inward and to the Torah for his musical inspirations, playing both thoughtful and good-time tunes. The Animas City Theatre, 128 E. College Dr., will host An Evening with Matisyahu on Monday, July 24. Doors are at 8:30 p.m. and the show starts at 9 for this $35, 18-and-over event. Deets at www.animascitytheatre.com.

Rock ’n’ roll and pizza always win Limousine Queen will slay the Billy Goat Saloon, 39848 U.S. Highway 160, in Bayfield, on Friday, July 21. If you’re in the mood for good time rock ’n’ roll to dance into your blackout, the show starts at 8:30 p.m. and goes till after midnight. Now is your time to waltz with a wing basket and through the smoke on the water. Get your boys back in town and don’t fear the reaper, it’s Friday night. Free gig for the 21-and-over set at a friendly bar with fun pub fare. Info at http://www.thebillygoatsaloon.com.

Four Corners Metal fest is back “What is this? It’s music to get a brain seizure by,” said Ozzy Osbourne about metal music. So, hey, what’s more fun than an optional seizure on a Saturday at a dive bar? Cheap beer and an all-ages show is gonna create a hella interesting mess of folks at Four Corners Metal Fest VII. Fifteen unground metal bands, including the death metal of Crepitus, the Lamb of God-influenced Under Exile, In My Distress, Graves of the Monuments, and In Vengeance will perform on Saturday, July 22, at Top Deck, 515 E. Main St., in Farmington. Yes, 15 bands for $10. Doors are at 2 p.m. Music starts at 2:30 p.m. More info and schedule at http://bit.ly/2usBSgD.

Rock ’n’ roll from Orlando The Huffington Post has a section titled “Weird Florida.” It’s dedicated to Floridians who eat pancakes in the street and alligator wrestle. The Groove Orient are from Orlando, and though we can’t promise you that they’ll wrestle prehistoric creatures at the Balcony Backstage, 600 Main Ave., we’ll commit to saying they’ll rock your face off on Friday, July 21. Free show for anyone 21 and over from 8:30 to 11 p.m. Hit up www.balconybarandgrill.com for details.

Ben Gibson Duo, 5-9 p.m.,

DoubleTree Hotel, Animas River Cafe, 501 Camino del Rio, 2596580. Free concert in the park: Southwest Civic Winds, 5:30

p.m., Buckley Park, 1200 Main Ave., www.durangoconcerts.com. Lisa Blue, 5:30 p.m., Kennebec

Cafe, 4 County Road 124. Terry Hartzel, 5:30 p.m., Dia-

mond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave., 247-4431. The West in Story and Song, 7 p.m., $19-$24, Henry

Strater Theatre, 699 Main Ave., 375-7160. Robin Davis, 7 p.m., Office Spiritorium, 699 Main Ave., 375-7260.

Bayfield Farmers Market,

Lewis College, Student Union, Ballroom, 1000 Rim Drive, 247-7010.

Indivisible Durango general membership meeting,

10 a.m., Durango Public Library, 1900 East Third Ave., 375-3380.

“Natural and Human History of the La Plata Mountains” workshop, 10:30 a.m.,

$0-$10, 1309 East Third Ave.

Henry Stoy piano, 11 a.m.,

Jean Pierre Bakery and Wine Bar, 601 Main Ave., 247-7700.

Lacey Black, 5 p.m., Serious Texas BBQ, 650 Camino del Rio. Annie’s Orphans 11th annual benefit dinner and silent auction, 5 p.m., $15, VFW,

1550 Main Ave.

Black Velvet Duo, 5-9 p.m., Dou-

bleTree Hotel, Animas River Cafe, 501 Camino del Rio, 259-6580.

fice Spiritorium, 699 Main Ave., 375-7260.

Monday God’s Direction – Better than GPS, 10 a.m., Christian

Science Reading Room, 1166 East Third Ave. Adam Swanson, 5:30 p.m., Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave., 247-4431. Pete Giuliani, 6-9:30 p.m., Far View Lodge, Mesa Verde National Park, 529-4421.

Tuesday Master’s Men Colorado,

6:30 a.m., DoubleTree Hotel, 501 Camino del Rio, 259-6580. Adam Swanson, 5:30 p.m., Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave., 247-4431. Tuesday jam, 6 p.m., Steaming Bean, 900 Main Ave., 403-1200. Tango Practica, 6 p.m., Rotary Park, 1565 East Second Ave. Tim Sullivan, 7 p.m., Office

Spiritorium, 699 Main Ave., 3757260.

Wednesday

Ben Gibson, 5-9 p.m., Rubio’s

Wee Walks with Durango Nature Studies, 10 a.m., $0-$5,

Live by Living Walk and Cancer Support Group, 9

Fine Mexican Dining, 116 South Main Ave., Aztec.

a.m., Durango Public Library, 1900 East Third Ave., 375-3380.

Terry Hartzel, 5:30 p.m., Dia-

High Pine Produce Farm Stand, 3 p.m., Smiley Cafe, 1309

Friday

Terry Hartzel, 5:30 p.m., Dia-

mond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave., 247-4431. Pete Giuliani Band, 5:30-

9:30 p.m., Balcony Bar and Grill, 600 Main Ave., 422-8008.

mond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave., 247-4431.

Hammers and High Heels,

7 p.m., $25, Ska Brewing Co., 225 Girard St., 247-5792.

Lisa Blue, 6 p.m., Fox Fire Farms,

Hello, Dollface, 7 p.m., Balcony Bar and Grill, 600 Main Ave., 4228008.

5513 County Road 321.

The West in Story and Song,

Bay 9 with Sarah Choszczyk, 6-8 p.m., Four Leaves

Winery, 528 Main Ave., 403-8182. Andy Janowsky, 7 p.m., Office

Spiritorium, 699 Main Ave., 3757260. The West in Story and Song, 7 p.m., $19-$24, Henry

Strater Theatre, 699 Main Ave., 375-7160. Andy Janowsky, 7 p.m., Office

7 p.m., $19-$24, Henry Strater Theatre, 699 Main Ave., 375-7160.

Secret Garden Summer Concert Series: The Assortment, 5 p.m., $10, Rochester

Hotel, 726 East Second Ave., 3851920.

Pete Giuliani, 5-9 p.m., Double-

Tree Hotel, Animas River Cafe, 501 Camino del Rio, 259-6580.

Concerts in the Plaza: Rob Webster, 5:30 p.m., Three

Springs Plaza, 175 Mercado St., 764-6000.

Kirk James Band, 9 p.m., Sky

Adam Swanson, 5:30 p.m., Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave., 247-4431.

torium, 699 Main Ave., 375-7260.

Ute Casino Resort, 14324 Highway 172, Ignacio, 563-7777.

Sunday Third annual Animas Splash and Dash, 9 a.m., $1-

$50, Durango High School, 2390 Main Ave.

Ben Gibson, 7-11 p.m., Derailed

Henry Stoy piano, 11 a.m.,

Pour House, 725 Main Ave., 2475440.

Jean Pierre Bakery and Wine Bar, 601 Main Ave., 247-7700.

Outdoor movie night: “Sing,” 8:30 p.m., Three Springs

Black Velvet Trio, 4 p.m., Bal-

Plaza, 175 Mercado St., 764-6000.

cony Bar and Grill, 600 Main Ave., 422-8008.

Limousine Queen, 8:30 p.m.,

Hello, Dollface, 5 p.m., Blue

Billy Goat Saloon, 39848 U.S. Highway 160, 884-9155.

The Legend of Danny Boy,

Ute Casino Resort, 14324 Highway 172, Ignacio, 563-7777.

East Third Ave.

Greg Ryder, 7 p.m., Office Spiri-

Spiritorium, 699 Main Ave., 3757260.

Kirk James Band, 9 p.m., Sky

Rotary Park, 1565 East Second Ave.

Spruce, 1875 County Road 500. 7 p.m., $19-$24, Henry Strater Theatre, 699 Main Ave., 375-7160. Robby Overfield, 7 p.m., Of-

The West in Story and Song, 7 p.m., $19-$24, Henry

Strater Theatre, 699 Main Ave., 375-7160. Terry Rickard, 7 p.m., Office Spiritorium, 699 Main Ave., 3757260.

Submissions To submit listings for publication in DGO and www. dgomag.com, visit www.

swscene.com, click “Add Your Event,” enter the event info into the form and submit. Listings at www. swscene.com will appear on www. dgomag.com and in our weekly print edition. Posting an event on www.swscene.com is free and takes one day to process.

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Horoscope ARIES (March 21 to April 19) Expect a surprise at home this week, especially with a parent or an older family member. Stock the fridge just in case because when unexpected things occur within the family, people want to eat. (Plus, surprise company might drop by.) TAURUS (April 20 to May 20) Be careful because this is an accident-prone week for your sign. Slow down and be mindful of everything you say and do. Keep your eyes open. Be smart. GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) Something unexpected will affect your cash, earnings and possessions this week. You might find money; you might lose money. Guard your possessions against loss or theft. (It’s that kind of day.) CANCER (June 21 to July 22)

Bizarro

Think before you speak this week be-

cause you feel restless, impulsive and perhaps upset. Remember: Once the words have left your mouth, you can’t get them back. LEO (July 23 to Aug. 22) This is a week where you feel vaguely restless and as if you’re waiting for the other shoe to drop. Guard against rash actions. Just sit this one out. VIRGO (Aug. 23 to Sept. 22) A friend might surprise you this week, or you might meet a real character. Something to do with groups and meetings will be unexpected – perhaps a cancellation. LIBRA (Sept. 23 to Oct. 22) Tread carefully when talking to parents and bosses this week because they might explode or say something you least expect. Don’t take it personally. Don’t quit your day job.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23 to Nov. 21) Your travel plans will be interrupted by cancellations, rescheduling or something you least expect. You also might meet someone unusual from another country. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22 to Dec. 21) Stay in touch with your banking needs and anything to do with shared property and inheritances this week because something will affect these areas of your life. Know what is happening!

working, your work routine might change because of computer glitches, power outages, staff shortages – whatever. Yikes! PISCES (Feb. 19 to March 20) Parents should be extra vigilant this week because this is an accident-prone week for their kids. Meanwhile, expect social plans, including sports events, to change or have surprises. BORN THIS WEEK

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20 to Feb. 18)

You are charming and sometimes shy. You make an excellent companion and confidant for others. Because you’re beginning a new nine-year cycle, this is the year to clarify your goals and begin to act on them. Hard work may be necessary to get a new venture moving. Fortunately, you will feel physically strong. This is a powerful year! Use it!

A health concern might suddenly arise this week. For those of you who are

© 2017 King Features Syndicate Inc.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22 to Jan. 19) A partner or close friend might throw you a curve ball this week. This person might want to change the status of your relationship. Who knows?

[portmanteaus] When you blend the sounds and meanings of two words to create a new one.

Pun•jus•ti•fied /pәn’jәst,fīd/ adjective 1. A request to use fewer puns that is not shown to be right or reasonable.

Sad•wich /’sadwiCH/ noun 1. A homemade sandwich you eat at your desk at work.

Com•plext adjective /käm’pleks/ When an idea or explanation is too complex for a text message.

Sneizure /’snēZHәr/ noun When you sneeze four or more times in a row.

22 | Thursday, July 20, 2017  • • •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••


[Durango’s stories, told in their own words]

First Person | Cyle Talley

‘THAT’S WHAT LIFE IS ALL ABOUT:

CATCHING AIR ON YOUR BIKE’ »» Brendan Shafer, on

BMX-ing with the kids in his neighborhood and life’s simple pleasures

Banjoist and cyclist-extraordinaire Brendan Shafer tells me more than once during our conversation that my questions are too deep. “You’ve got to ease up,” he says. “Questions like that make people want to try to say profound things, but when you try to sound profound, nothing profound comes out, you know?” Despite himself, Brendan has something profound to say and – spoiler alert – it involves Seinfeld and frozen pizza. I tell his story here, in his own words.

N

one day I go out to ride with the kids, and ear my house, there’s one Miguel is riding it! I was like, “What the hell, of those housing complexes Miguel?! Dude, that’s my bike! Where did – what’re they called, subyou get that?!” And he – he is the nicest kid – sidized housing? Affordable he says, “Oh, my uncle found it by the river housing? I guess it’s not important. when he was running from the cops and Anyway, there’re all of these kids that he passed out for two days and he woke up live there and they ride the shittiest bikes and it was right there and then he brought around in the alley behind my house. it back here!” And I was so confused. “What These things are not pretty. They don’t the hell are you talking about, Miguel?” have grips, they barely even roll, but Miguel showed me the bike and the logos these kids ride them around in a pack, had been all scraped off and it had paint pen wreaking havoc. I’ll get on my BMX bike all over it, and I was just like, “Whatever, and ride with them, and it’s so much fun. Miguel. It’s yours. You can keep it. Just – I It’s one of my favorite things to do. We don’t know – put it inside and don’t let anyhave this dirt hill on the corner of my block and you can catch air off it. That’s one take it. I’m glad you have it.” I wasn’t what life is about. There’s the answer gonna take it back. It’s Miguel. He’s the shit. to your question – that’s what life is all He was having a great time on it, too. Before about: catching air on your bike. That’s that, he had a Wal-Mart girl’s bike, so now no [eff]ing joke. he’s beyond stoked and he can actually ride it a little bit better. So it’s good. I need less Anyway, those kids rip around. They’ll shit in my life, so it’s good that it went to try to do tricks, and I never really want to be Miguel. like, “OK, kids, let Uncle Brendan show you I really like those kids. They get it. We go how to do this!” but I’ll kinda egg ’em on. I’ll out, we have a great time riding around, and take my hand off the handlebar in the air, then we all go home. That’s the shit. You and then they’ll try to do it, and it’s totally make a living however you can, you go do sketchy. So often, when a kid is going off that something fun, you go home, and you sit on dirt hill and I’m not sure what they’re going the couch and watch Seinfeld. You don’t need to do, I’m like, “Oh God!” I’m just waiting to load up your bicycle with your USA-made for the day that some kid eats shit. If one douche bags – that’s douche-hyphen-bag, of those kids ever gets hurt or something, it’s a play on words – and going somewhere, I don’t know what I would do. Now that I getting rained on and being uncomfortable, think about it, I don’t know any of these but still [puts nose up in the air] “I’m out in kids’ last names, or who their parents even nature, there’s no one here; no one else is are. I guess I’d have to be like, “I gotta go. around me and I’m doing something authenGood luck.” Courtesy of Brendan Shafer One day, this adult lady came out of the tic!” No, dude. You’re not. Just go home and »»  Brendan Shafer, recording sound art. complex and was kinda looking at me as we watch TV. It’s the best. There’s nothing betwere all riding around and goes, “Miguel ter than sitting on the couch and watching said ...” – there’s this kid named Miguel, Seinfeld with a frozen pizza. left! That was all she said! and I think this was his mom. “Miguel said that he was going to go and hang out with his 30-year old Miguel is the nicest kid. I had this BMX bike and I Cyle Talley sometimes sits and thinks, and sometimes he couldn’t figure out what I did with it for the longest friend in the alley. I just wanted to see what that was just sits, and sometimes he uses album titles in place of about.” I was like, “Yep! That’s me!” And then she time. I just couldn’t find it anywhere. So anyway, his feelings. Email him at: cyle@cyletalley.com ��������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������   Thursday, July 20, 2017 | 23


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