Greetings From Summer Where Fun Lives

art entertainment food drink music nightlife Thursday, June 14, 2018

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There is beer. There is music. There are shows and festivals galore. What more could you want?

Also: A review of dreamy Bay Dream, experimental sushi, and a bittersweet tribute to Anthony Bourdain

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DGO Magazine

STAFF

What’s inside Volume 3 Number 34 Thursday, July 14, 2018

*

Editor Angelica Leicht aleicht@bcimedia.com 375-4551

Arty Party

Jessie O’Brien jobrien@bcimedia.com Sales Liz Demko 375-4553 Contributors

Wellness

5

Eat What the Fork 5

DGO photo contributor Lucy Schaefer dropped herself in the midst of beer, ink, and art at the Your Fleshparty over the weekend.

Staff writer

4

Sushi Scene

8

Sound

Downtown Lowdown

6

8

Album Reviews 9

Katie Cahill

10 Stage

Christopher Gallagher

11 Drink

Sean Moriarty

Check out the photos on Page 23 and many more at dgomag.com

Lucy Schaefer

Lucy Schaefer/Special to DGO

Cooper Stapleton

18 Life Hax

Robert Alan Wendeborn

19 Happening

Editor-at-Large

20 DGO Deals

Bryant Liggett Jon E. Lynch Lindsay Mattison

16 Weed

David Holub Design/layout

4

Colossal Sanders 375-4570 Chief Executive Officer Douglas Bennett V.P. of Advertising David Habrat Founding Editors Amy Maestas David Holub

DGO is a free weekly publication distributed by Ballantine Communications Inc., and is available for one copy per person. Taking more than five copies of an edition from a distribution location is illegal and is punishable by law according to Colorado Revised Statute 18-9-314.

My love for beer has taken me all over the country. It’ll take me all over the world, I’m sure, but all of that started by hanging out with Tony, when I was lonely and lost at home.

The idea behind floating is that the warm water and lack of stimuli will help you relax, which could ultimately lead to a meditative state. You know... kind of like those sensory deprivation chambers of old.

Reader Services

6

Breaking (sushi) traditions The handle of executive chef Ray Srisamer’s 18-year-old sushi knife is centimeters smaller than his newer, $1,000 custom knife. He keeps both in his toolkit as he works behind the bar at Pop Sushi, making swift, fluid movements as he slices the fish into uniform pieces.

Reviews

16, 17

22 Horoscope/ puzzles

23 Bittersweet Bourdain

Floating freely

First Draughts 11

23 Pics

/dgomag

/dgomag

@dgo_mag

ON THE COVER Just find a spot at Buckley Park and stay there all summer.

Colossal Sanders/DGO; image via BCI Media file

Tell us what you think!

Got something on your mind? Have a joke or a story idea or just something that the world needs to know?

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@dg

dg

[wellness]

FLOATING:

IT’S WORTH THE BURNING NASAL CAVITIES Angelica Leicht DGO EDITOR

When one of DGO’s advertising gurus asked me if I wanted to go float recently, I had no idea what she was talking about.

“Float? Uh... float?” I asked, confused.

What, pray tell, was a float? Did it have something to do with the river? A pool party? Some sort of weird new drug? The answer to whether I wanted to do any (or all) of those would have been a resounding no, but as it turns out, floating has nothing to do with the river, a pool, or a novel new street drug anyway. Nope. It turns out that floating is allowing your body to suspend on top of salty, womb-temperature water in a very dark room. It’s much more sophisticated.

It’s also much more salty – Epsom salty, in fact. Our float destination was Salt360 Float Studio (3750 N. Main Ave.), a float studio that uses 1,000 pounds of Epsom salt in just 12 inches of water to create a solution that buoys your body to the top of the tank. The water is warmed to 95 degrees.

The idea behind floating is that the warm water and lack of stimuli will help you relax and clear your mind, which could ultimately lead to a meditative state. You know... kind of like those sensory deprivation chambers of old. The giant metal ones that look like oversized pills or Medieval torture devices.

Liz Demko/DGO I have admittedly not tried a sensory depriva»» Salt360 Float Studio tion chamber, but I have seen them on TV (“The Simpsons” counts, you guys), and I knew if this shower to wash away any grooming products prefloat business was anything like what Lisa and soak, and the salt residue after. They even provide Homer went through, my answer was going to be ear plugs – the awesome silicone kind. hard pass. Shutting myself in a metal container did As nice as the digs at Salt360 are, though, I was not seem relaxing; it seemed like a recipe for disaster, still slightly nervous about spending a solid 90 minand/or trying to claw my way out.

“Yeah, no... I don’t want to do that. I’m pretty utes in a room devoid of... anything. Luckily, owner claustrophobic, and I don’t really sit still. Like, Cassidy Bruno – a calming force in the madness – ever,” I said. caught on. She walked me through the process, even “Come on!” she said. “It’s actually really cool. You giving me a few float hacks along the way. should try it.”

“You can always roll up one of the washcloths This back and forth went on for a few days until I and prop open the door a bit if you need some light,” gave in. I’ll do pretty much anything for a story, so I she said. “We’ve had people do that. It might let out agreed to float with the stipulation that my DGO ad some of the warmth, though.” buddy go along with me. I needed someone around to I was left to my own devices a few minutes later. shove the Valium in my mouth in case I freaked out.

I’ll be honest with you. The process of lowering She, of course, did NOT end up going, and left me myself into a dark tank of water, accessible only to face my fears alone. (Thanks a lot, Liz.) through a door in the wall of the room, was not an I found out quickly, though, that my fears of dying easy one. All I could think of was what could be at Salt360 were unwarranted. Their version of floatlurking within its confines.

As you may have guessed, there was nothing in ing is more spa treatment than torture chamber, that room other than 12 inches of salty water and me. with individual pools and modern private rooms.

I knew this because I did indeed wuss out and stick a There is nothing enclosed about it – the tubs have washcloth in the door for some light. Crisis averted. high ceilings and there’s plenty of room in there to »» The first 30 minutes: This was the toughest. splash around. Each room comes with a raindrop

My mind was a disaster – a cluttered, cobwebbed disaster – and it was tough to relax. I had email to check, stories to edit, and phone calls to make.

Laying in the (admittedly very nice) water felt like a luxury I could not afford. I distracted myself by counting the beats of my heart – which I could hear in my ears, thanks to those impenetrable ear plugs – and spinning in circles as I floated freely on top of the water. »» 30 minutes in: Relaxation attempt, round one. Or, I think it was half an hour in. I was deprived of a clock, but it felt like half an hour. It also felt like I doing pretty well. I was committed to this process, and I was no longer worried about the dark. I removed the towel, shut the door, and tried to relax. And then it hit me – Epsom salts right in the eye. And the nose. Sitting up had caused water to drip across my face, and in case you’re wondering, Epsom salts frigging burn. »» 45 minutes in: Relaxation attempt, round two. Once the burning abated, I gave myself a little pep talk. It’s time for you to really focus, I said, and stop being such a mess. I remembered reading somewhere that if you’re having trouble relaxing, you should talk to each of your body parts, from your toes to your head, and tell them to relax.

Toes, relax. Foot, relax. You get the idea. My arms released themselves from the death grip they had on each other behind my head, and my toes unclenched. I relaxed.

I’m not going to tell you I had any float inner-epiphanies or cubby wubby womb-room meditations, but I did, indeed, relax. Screw email, I thought. This room is warm, and it’s so comfortable in this water. Whoever it is – whatever it is – can wait.

And then, just as quickly as it started, it was over.

The rest of the time had gone by in a flash. Three solid knocks – the ones to alert me that my float was over – invaded the silence that had finally washed over me, and the spell was broken.

I don’t know if I could have ever gotten to the meditative state that some floaters can get to – I’m just not sure that’s in my DNA. But I do know that I was a little sad to wave goodbye to my tank on the way out, destined for real life with sopping wet hair.

Destined for noise.

If you’re in the market for a new way to center yourself, I think this floating business might be worth the time commitment. It might even be worth the burning nasal cavities. Would I have told you this a few days ago? No. No I wouldn’t have. I would have told you to run for the hills. But I’m telling you this now.

I’ll be back, Salt360, and next time I’ll just shut the door and take my chances. It’s probably safer than Epsom salts in the nasal cavity anyway.

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[eat]

What the Fork | Lindsay Mattison

Stop with the snake-oil diet plans and just eat the pizza

I

This type of negative thinking has n a polarizing world of led to the many “xx-free” diets that ingredients, what should I deprive our bodies of necessary nutrieat? ents while simultaneously overloading As an avid foodie, I’m nutrithem with others. If your macro-nutionally agnostic. I’m well-informed and I even write for a popular nutrients (fats, proteins, and carbohydrates) always equal 100-percent, you trition blog, but I eat everything can imagine what happens when you without subscribing to any particular dietary philosophy. I’m happy reduce the percentage of one of them. for people who find direction and The other two go up, which means there are no cuts without sacrifices. meaning in Whole30, Keto, or Paleo Probably too low Gluten-free diets not only omit benefiprograms, and I try my best to understand anyone who has cut out my cial fiber and whole grains from your Avoid it. No, wait, don’t beloved carbs (personally, I’ve never life, but the foods themselves are often met a carb I didn’t love). But, in the packed full of sugars. Low-fat foods end, I don’t pay much attention to are loaded up with carbs to make them Cholesterol is good now what they say you should eat betaste good, while high-protein-low-carb diets are incredibly rich in saturated cause I’m simply not into depriving Eat all you want these days! (ahem, “bad”) fats. myself.

And still, none of these omission Not to throw anyone under the Avoid at all costs diets actually answer the question of bus or anything, but it’s the Dr. Is fiber good or bad? what we should eat. I’m not exactly a Oz’s of the world that turned me off nutrition sorcerer like my friend Dr. from the whole scene. Come on. Any [Sugar industry said to leave this blank] O., but I’d like to think Michael Pollan doctor that uses the words “magical said it best: “Eat food, not too much, weight loss solution” should techniScience is still out mostly plants.” It’s uncomplicated, it cally be re-designated as a wizard indoesn’t arouse fear, and it encourages stead of a medical doctor. It doesn’t * Percent Daily Values are based on a 2,000 calorie diet. Your Daily you to put thought into what goes into help his case that the snake-oil he Values may vary depending on which quack diet you’re on your body. It allows you to choose your touts usually ends up being discredfoods with a specific emphasis on real ited by some authority or another. foods (you know, without long, unproDon’t believe me? Just Google “Doctor Oz coconut oil” and you’ll read nounceable ingredient lists). Anything all about how “coconut oil super made in a lab or that comes in a box – powers” turned into a cause of heart really, the entire middle section of the disease [Editor’s note: Don’t you grocery store – should probably be in dare shit-talk my beloved coconut that “not too much” category. oil; you can pry that from my cold, So, stop depriving yourself of dead, artery-clogged hands. -AL]. food-related joy and eat what your Colossal Sanders for DGO There’s a certain amount of body craves. Find your own way into fear-mongering that comes with a balanced diet that works for you and modern nutrition, and I’m sick of it. The headlines your body type. Ideally, one that includes whole In all of this, no one is talking positively about scream: Prevent obesity and diabetes by switching grains and complex carbohydrates, lean proteins, food. Eating is supposed to be a pleasurable experito a plant-based diet (despite the fact that no culture healthy fats, and lots (and lots) of fruits and vegence, but newscasts and health magazines tend to in history has ever subsisted on a vegan diet). Eat inspire guilt and anxiety instead. Sadly, this panetables. In the end, it’s everything in moderation, like the cavemen to live a longer, healthier life (wait, icked state isn’t exactly breaking news. In the ’60s, including moderation. Don’t be afraid to throw it all didn’t cavemen average 5 feet 5 inches tall and die it was, “Eat margarine, not butter,” probably told to out every once in a while, and give into those cravaround age 35?). Stay away from those fats – wait, no, ings – you’ll probably find me doing the same as I you by a doctor as he blew cigarette smoke in your fats are good for you again. It’s the carbs that will (without shame) eat an entire extra-cheese pizza all face. The ’70s brought an avoidance of MSG (okay, kill you – except for those found in sweet potatoes, of that one is still hanging around out there), and the to myself this weekend. course. And don’t even get me started on gluten-free. cholesterol content of eggs has been an ever-present Sorry… sorry… I know I’m completely offending SO conversation. Each of those trends has undergone Lindsay D. Mattison is a professional chef and food writer MANY OF YOU, but unless you’re one of the 1-persome form of flip-floppery over the past few decades. living in Durango. She enjoys long walks in the woods, All the while, we’re demonizing specific foods withcent of the U.S. population with celiac disease or a the simplicity of New York-style cheese pizza, and she’s wheat allergy, following a gluten-free diet probably completely addicted to Chapstick. Contact her at lindsayout getting any closer to understanding which ones mattisonwriter@gmail.com. are actually good for us. sets you up for nutritional deficiencies.

Serving Size: We’ll get back to you on that

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[eat] Three sashimi dishes for the sweet, spicy, or smoky lovers

BREAKING TRADITIONS

Smoky This Hamachi Cure is full of contrasts, like many of Srisamer’s creations. It’s made with house-smoked yellowtail jack with orange oil, Asian pear, salt, pepper, garlic, and yucca root chips. Raw fish and raisins seem like strange bedfellows, but they have excellent chemistry.

The sweetness from the raisins is distinct next to the mild smoky fish, and the crunchy yucca root adds texture, creating a rustic dish.

Spicy The Thai chili in the Hamachi Supreme (yellowtail, orange, ponzu, Thai chili, and tobiko) is not for the faint of heart. The citrus brightens the dish and mellows the spice, but not by too much. The heat creeps in and has a strong kick.

Jessie

»» Chef Ray Srisamer Jessie O’Brien DGO STAFF WRITER

Sweet Srisamer likes using fruit in his dishes (it’s found in all three of these dishes featured here). In the Tuna and Goat Cheese he uses Fuji apple with ponzu (citrus and soy sauce) and olive oil. The tangy goat cheese and meaty tuna make the dish seem more like an Asian-inspired charcuterie board than sashimi. Eat everything at once to get the full effect of the flavors.

The handle of executive chef Ray Srisamer’s 18-year-old sushi knife is centimeters smaller than his newer, $1,000 custom knife. After years of use, he’s worn down the wood, but keeps both in his toolkit as he works behind the bar at Pop Sushi, making swift, fluid movements as he prepares the amberjack, tuna, yellowtail, and eel with precision, slicing each piece of colorful fish into uniform pieces.

The fish – and those knives – are the building blocks for Srisamer’s raw art, which he’s been making for hungry, sushi-loving patrons since Pop Sushi opened its doors under Jimmy Nguyen, who also co-owns Rice Monkeys, in 2017.

Under Srisamer, Pop Sushi has become known for its specialty dishes, including their bright, fresh

sashimi and contemporary takes on traditional dishes.

Srisamer wasn’t always into food, though. A transplant from Northern Thailand, Srisamer was working in the family steel business when his cousin asked if he wanted to make sushi.

“What is that?” Srisamer asked.

One bite of raw, mild-flavored red snapper and Srisamer was seduced by the world of fresh fish. But while Thailand had sushi spots at the time – Japanese workers brought the cuisine to Thailand many years ago – sushi wasn’t the staple that it is today.

Even back then, the 18-year-old Srisamer knew he wanted to get into the business, but it was difficult because restaurants in Thailand were limited, so he started off washing dishes and as helping hand in the kitchen.

Srisamer continued his sushi education in Okina-

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»» Pop Sushi chef’s quarter-century of experience is evident in his elegant, inventive dishes

wa, where he was trained in traditional sushi methods. Japanese-style sushi is simpler than the dishes Srisamer creates these days at Pop Sushi, and consists mainly of rice, fish, and soy sauce.

To some, there is no other way to eat sushi. Even in Durango, Srisamer can have a hard time getting strict traditionalists on board the experimental sushi ship. He has an ongoing friendly sparring match with one of his closest friends, a Japanese sushi chef who won’t eat anything nontraditional.

With respect to the cuisine’s roots, owner Nguyen and Srisamer feel that mindset is limited.

“You were trained in “Karate Kid”-mode to do one thing,” Nguyen said of traditional chefs. “But you lost out of the experience to use other ingredients.”

Nguyen said what is considered traditional today is blurry. Does adding a sprine O’Brien/DGO kle of lemon zest to hamachi deem it nontraditional?

Pop Sushi offers dishes like this, such as the sashimi plate, but Srisamer pushes most further than an extra dab of mayo and a dash of sea salt.

Part of that experimental mindset comes courtesy of Srisamer’s extensive training and exposure to new ideas.

In 2002, Srisamer was sponsored to work in Boulder, Colorado, and landed at a number of restaurants before being poached by James Beard Foundation award-winning chef, Tyson Cole. Cole’s Austin, Texas, restaurant, Uchi, is considered one of the best in the state.

It was at Uchi where Srisamer learned the contemporary approach

apparent in Pop Sushi’s specialty sashimi dishes. Take, for instance, the Hamachi Supreme, a Durango crowd-pleaser made with thin sliced yellowtail, cold, fresh orange slices, ponzu, Thai chili, garlic, and tobiko (flying fish roe). The sweet citrus, salty roe, and hot spice is a most exciting threesome.

Artistry aside, Srisamer’s experience is expressed by his precise prep work and tidy workstation.

“His cutting board is pristine. It’s perfect,” Nguyen said. “He looks like a very trustworthy person to eat raw fish from.”

And Pop Sushi diners do trust him.

People often ask for recommendations. The Japanese palate may be limited regarding ingredients, but the American palate is, for the most part, less open to a variety of fish. Uni, or sea urchin, is a staple in Japan, but Srisamer said getting people to try uni often takes him suggesting it.

Srisamer likes making custom orders for regulars (and anyone else) who have exhausted the menu and want something they haven’t tasted.

“I just make something I would want to eat,” he said.

Freestyle cooking keeps the seasoned chef from getting bored, and gives him the chance to show people that an excellent sushi dinner doesn’t have to cost a day’s pay. That misconception is something Srisamer wants diners to understand – a higher price tag does not always mean better.

Being in a small mountain town, the available fish can vary more than it would in coastal states like Florida, but Colorado still has access to high-quality fish. Pop Sushi purchases premium fish from Seattle Fish Co. three times a week for freshness.

And with a veteran chef like Srisamer preparing your meal, chances are it’s better than you’d find in many high-end big city restaurants.

“I love to cook. I love to make sushi,” Srisamer said. “That’s why I’ve stayed with one job for so long.”

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[sound]

Downtown Lowdown | Bryant Liggett

Aaron Einhouse does country music his own way

M

usic columnists have penned a lot of words and spilled a lot of ink describing the music business, how it evolves, and how musicians adapt to an unpredictable business model. The act of making music and the act of navigating the music business are two very different things, and despite all of the crap musicians deal with, there is a beauty that lies within the uncertainty of the business. These days, a creative musician with an independent mindset can make the rules and release music by methods that work for them.

Release a few 7-inches. Put out four songs on cassette and sell them at shows or via your website. Or, in the case of Austin, Texas-bred country rocker Aaron Einhouse, release a single song or two every four months, accompanied by a video, and then crank out a full-length record every few years.

The single song method is working for Einhouse, who will pull into Durango on Friday and Saturday, where he’ll perform at the Wild Horse Saloon.

In a world full of fickle music fans who buy singles rather than an entire album, some musicians need to go for the inexpensive method when releasing their work. Einhouse remains a realist who tosses out one song and video at a time, letting his live shows act as the bread and butter that keeps fans asking for more.

“It’s so much more cost-effective to do singles rather than do a whole record, where you promote three or four of the songs, and three-quarters of the people (who) listen don’t hear the rest,” said Einhouse. “That’s what I’m doing right now. I don’t know that I’ll do that forever, but we’ll see.”

A sturdy listen reveals Einhouse has done his homework, studying all of the important contributions made to the country, country-rock and cowpunk genres.

Einhouse’s last traditional re-

Courtesy of Aaron Einhouse

GO! Saturday: Folk and bluegrass with Route 358, 6 p.m., no cover. The Balcony, 600 Main Ave., upstairs.

Information: 422-8008.

Friday/Saturday: Country-rock with Aaron Einhouse, 8:30 p.m., $10.

Wild Horse Saloon, 601 E. 2nd Ave. Information: 970-375-2568. cord release was “It Ain’t Pretty,” released in 2016. It’s an album that’s country enough for The Wild Horse, yet still rock and roll enough for the Dickies coat-wearing, Pabst Blue Ribbon-drinking crowd of rock fans, who know enough to appreciate some Johnny Cash or David Allen Coe, along with Lucero or the Old 97’s.

Einhouse’s album, and his sound in

general, reflect a kid reared on the classic rock canon, a kid who was lucky enough to discover the songs written by the defiant, anti-Nashville, indie-folk outlaws who have kicked around Texas’ capitol for decades.

His last few singles are honest and pure country-rock. “LoLo” is reminiscent of the country blues of ZZ Top, while “John’s Camaro” is a bouncy number with lyrics that are right out of a classic American narrative.

Einhouse can ballad it up as well.

Tunes like “Back Down to Earth” and “Nobody Knows” are far removed from what people know as country.

They’re devoid of excessive of twang, and they dip into American jam and roots music instead.

“My mom got me into music early on. Going through all her old music,

they are big classic rock fans. Pink Floyd, Led Zeppelin. Then I heard a Townes Van Zandt song at my uncle’s funeral. My uncle was a big fan of Townes, Guy Clark, and a Rodney Crowell fan. So, I heard that and it jumped out at me. So, I started going through all those catalogs and listening to all the songs. Now I can sing every one of them and play most of them. That’s what started me on this kind of music,” said Einhouse.

“Yeah, we do kind of have a country background, but also, you know there’s a lot of folk in there, and a lot of rock and roll, all that kind of comes out.”

Bryant Liggett is a freelance writer and KDUR station manager. liggett_b@fortlewis.edu.

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[sound] What’s new Music can, and does, serve many a purpose for the listener. The active listener, that is – those of us who listen to music actively, and by that I mean we listen in the foreground rather than the background. We pay close attention, as the music serves a purpose.

The purpose varies from listener to listener, and from situation to situation. No matter what it is, good or bad, happy or sad, there is a perfect song, a perfect album, a perfect soundtrack to accompany that very specific scenario, feeling, or state of mind. Sometimes you just need a heavy dose of rock and roll to cure whatever is ailing you. Family or loved one grinding your gears?

Work bringing you down? Is your town on fire? Try the tried and true catharsis

New at

June 14 Christina Aguilera, “Liberation” One of the queens of pop music has returned for her first album in six years. The inspiration behind the record is evident from the title, with Aguilera exploring and harnessing the waves of various female empowerment movements and political agitation into an album that, while somewhat low energy, does well to show her strengths as a vocalist and a songwriter. The majority of the record is heavy with pianos and strings, focusing on slow ballads rather than the bombastic pop songs or the slick with sex appeal style of her more popular work. And then we get tracks like “Accelerate,” with 2 Chainz and Ty Dollar $ign, and produced by Kanye West.

Even with that combination, we get a subdued Christina who is content to be more vibe-y and sit in the groove of the beat.

Buddy Guy,“Blues is Alive and Well” Blues music has its fair share of prolific artists, but if we were to have a conversation about the greatest of the greats, Buddy Guy would certainly be in the running. “Blues Is Alive and Well” is the man’s 18th solo record, and he

of sludge fuzz.

This week’s album arrived just when it needed to, right when I needed it most. Los Angeles quintet Here Lies Man return with their sophomore effort, picking up where their 2017 debut left off, and still questioning listeners with, “What if Black Sabbath played Afrobeat?” Here Lies Man was co-founded by Marcos Garcia (guitar, bass, keys, vocals) of Antibalas, and former Antibalas member (and son of Herbie Mann) Geoff Mann (drums, percussion, bass). Garcia and Mann are joined by Richard Panta and

brings along some appearances from other blues royalty to sweeten the deal even further. Mick Jagger swaggers in his guest appearance on “You Did The Crime,” a nice, smooth slab of slow electric blues, while his band mate Keith Richards teams up with Buddy and Jeff Beck on the somehow even smoother ode, “Cognac.” The whole record is chock full of Buddy Guy’s signature storytelling style and cool electric blues, but the record is not without its somber and reflective moments. Fans of the style and of Buddy Guy himself won’t be disappointed with this record, but it also holds few surprises.

Reinaldo DeJesus on congas, and Victor Axelrod on keyboards.

The five seasoned musicians meld the heaviness of classic ’60s and ’70s-inspired psychedelia with the traditional polyrhythms of Afrobeat to create an amalgam of funk heaviness. The record meanders some, seamlessly blending styles and flavors into one cohesive, necessary offering.

Play it loud and play it often. Pick it up directly from the label or at your favorite local independent record store, while you still can.

“You Will Know Nothing” is available Friday, June 15, thanks to Riding Easy Records, as a digital download in your choice of various high quality formats (320K MP3, FLAC, or ALAC), on compact disc and on vinyl in a standard black colorway. There are also two limited edition bundles, both on clear vinyl. The first is the record, on its own, limited to 300 copies, and the second is a deluxe edition and includes the record and an 11x11 booklet.

did start to drag after a little while. After decades in the music business, it is weird to think of this as Mike Shinoda’s debut solo album, but he’s has certainly found the inspiration and the right time to release a record – one that is very

clearly important to him.

Recommended for fans of touring companions Earthless and Fu Manchu, King Gizzard & the Lizard Wizard, Wooden Shjips, and of course Black Sabbath and Afrobeat.

—— Jon E. Lynch KDUR_PD@fortlewis.edu

Other new releases this week include Madball, Mayday Parade, Johnny Marr, a trilogy of remastered Tom Waits records, Rebelution, and more.

—— Cooper Stapleton

Mike Shinoda, “Post Traumatic” There is a lot looming over “Post Traumatic.” Following the tragic death of Chester Bennington last year, Bennington’s Linkin Park band mate Mike Shinoda has released a burst of new music, which was created during the time Shinoda spent in isolation after the frontman’s untimely passing.

Shinoda is a musician known for being somewhat larger than life, but the first half of “Post Traumatic” is surprisingly restrained, and it almost feels like Shinoda was working through the stages of grief. About halfway through, the rapping starts to show itself again and a bit of the attitude of his older material returns. At that point, it starts to feel like Shinoda is working toward acceptance of the world as it is now.

Overall, the record is very powerful, if a bit long-winded. The 16 tracks clock in at just under an hour, and the album

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The Alternative Resource

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[stage]

CHECK YOUR PRIVILEGE

»» Storytelling series The Raven Narratives takes on entitlement as the central theme

»» Gabriel Bernier on the Durango Arts Center stage for the Raven Narratives Story Slam in January 2018.

Courtesy of Red Scarf Shots

Jessie O’Brien DGO STAFF WRITER

When Daniel Sullivan was hired right out of college to teach in the Watts district of South Central Los Angeles, he knew he wasn’t hired because of his abilities. ‘“(The principal) wanted to give me a leg-up to get me into the teaching profession. I was aware that it unfairly benefited me,” Sullivan said. “I was hired because of my white male privilege.”

This is the story Sullivan will be telling as part of The Raven Narratives, a storytelling series that’s the Colorado version of The Moth, a popular podcast and live event series. Every installment centers around a certain theme, and eight storytellers will share their experiences in 8 minutes or less.

Co-producer Sarah Syverson thought it would be a fitting topic for the times, as stories about sexual

harassment and racism consistently make headlines. The idea was initiated after a friend told her a story about how he, a white man, was arrested with his black friend. He was able to get out of jail after being bailed out by his parents, who had the means to do so, while his black friend had to sit behind bars.

The Raven Narratives storytellers all approach the topic from a different angle. One speaker will talk about his relationship with his dog, another about the Confederate flag. One storyteller will discuss the word’s Latin roots.

Participants pitched ideas to Syverson and co-producer Tom Yoder. Syverson and Yoder hold workshops for the storytellers. Yoder said they help participants form a narrative arch and refine the clunky bits. Yoder and Syverson ask participants to fill in small details so the story becomes vivid in the audience’s mind – What did your skin feel like?

What was the weather like?

For Sullivan, he thought back to his time at the Watts middle school. It was overwhelming, but the African American teacher mentor he was assigned to, Yvonne Hutchinson, didn’t give a damn.

“She said, ‘I am not interested in you becoming a better teacher for yourself; I am interested in you becoming a better teacher for my people,’” Sullivan said. “I was benefited by my race. She demanded a higher standard.”

Hear the rest of Sullivan’s story and other personal tales of privilege on June 15 and 16 at the Sunflower Theater and Durango Arts Center, respectively, at 7:30 p.m. Tickets are $15 in advance and $20 at the door.

“I ask (the audience) to be there and to listen deeply, to suspend judgment and deepen that sense of hearing people and hearing their stories,” Yoder said.

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[beer]

First Draughts | Robert Alan Wendeborn

My journey started with Anthony Bourdain

W

hen I first finished grad school, I moved to Portland, Oregon, to pursue the life of a creative. I had high hopes of being a copywriter for an ad agency, or maybe a creative writing instructor. I found very quickly that this life was already being lived by thousands of other young people, that there wasn’t room for one more gainfully employed poet, and that I’d have to join the ranks of the countless other unemployed poets. This was the bottom of the recession, in 2011, and the unemployment rate in Portland was at 9 percent – even higher for younger folk. I worked odd jobs, I was an extra in an episode of the NBC series “Grimm,” I helped move antiques, I taught after school art classes, I dabbled in content creation, but nothing could really get me through. I blew through my savings, I blew through my parents’ money, and when “Portlandia” starting airing that winter, I realized I was a walking, talking cliche: a 27-year-old retired poet living in Portland. I knew I had to get out of Portland, so I moved back home, into my childhood home for the first time since I was 18.

Moving back to my hometown of Farmington, New Mexico, after 10 years, was a shock to say the least.

All of my friends had moved away or started families. I was living with my youngest brother, who had just turned 21, and I had no real interactions with actual humans. Even though I very quickly got a job teaching at San Juan College, I still didn’t connect with the community. My life was lived on the Internet, streaming movies and shows on Netflix, talking shit on Twitter, and curating the appearance of a full life on Facebook. The closest thing to a friend I had was Anthony Bourdain and his show, “No Reservations.” I traveled, ate, and drank vicariously through his show. I partied in Iceland, I tripped on Ayahuasca in Peru, I gorged myself on wine and little fish in Sicily. Diving

to mess up a fermentation). I knew if I wanted to do it for real, I needed to move to California and work some harvests, or I needed to learn something else. I needed to grow or else I’d stall.

I needed to keep those neurons in the poetic portion of my brain firing when I encountered a new liquid, a new food, or a new place with new air. I chose beer, and it’s taken me all over the country. It’ll take me all over the world, I’m sure, but all of that started by hanging out with Tony, when I was lonely and lost at home.

Robbie Wendeborn is the head brewer at Svendæle Brewing in Millerton, New York.

He is also a former beer plumber at Ska Brewing.

Associated Press file

»» Anthony Bourdain, the former owner and chef of now-defunct Les Halles restaurant, sitting at one of the tables in New York in 2001.

into his life gave me a creative outlet I wouldn’t have had otherwise, and it intellectualized and beautified a part of my life I had never thought about: food, drink, and travel.

This living vicariously couldn’t be maintained. I knew I had to travel for myself, get out of Farmington as often as I could, eat and drink with as much variety as possible. Most of the time that ended up being in Durango.

Drinking delicious beer all over town, eating insanely good food in so many different styles, and meeting people who were just as passionate about travel, food, and drink. And meanwhile, I was getting more and more disillusioned from teaching. Who would have thought a place that has a mission to create passionate learners could totally lack passion? Not only was there a lack of passion, but it was being sucked out of me daily. I realized that I would rather do something that used my body, my senses, and my mind, not just the part of the brain you use to grade 75-150 freshman essays a week. I found the first

job that seemed like it could do all of that: wine maker at a small winery in Durango. I applied and got the job.

It was a challenge at first, learning all the ins and outs of the equipment, process, and facilities, but what was really awesome was all the expanding sensual connections that started happening. My poet brain and my taste buds, my olfactory neurons, and the way an angle of light would trickle through a liquid and into my retinas, were all lining up. I could differentiate between 10-plus varieties of grape, I could lead impromptu tastings, and could spout poetic descriptions about even the most benign liquids. It was as if I had gone to grad school for poetry, but all the tools grad school gave were actually built for tasting wine.

While working at the winery, I moved to Durango, and kept traveling and writing. I kept eating and drinking as much variety as I could, and very quickly outgrew the winery (we were getting all of our juice from suppliers in California, and the process was so down pat it would take a real moron

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SUMMER 2018 THE SUMMER OF BEER AND MUSIC J

ust call Summer 2018 the summer of beer and music. Or, it’s the summer of beer and music in Durango, anyway. From the free Concert in the Park series at Buckley Park to the rad shows coming through Community Concert Hall at Fort Lewis College – hello, The Wailin’ Jennys and Asleep at the Wheel, anyone? – there will be plenty of music to go around.

Oh, and plenty of beer. Whether it’s the Summer Brew Beer and Music Fest at Purgatory or the Pine River and San Juan Brewfests, if beer is what you’re after, this summer’s festivals come bearing it.

There are tons of other entertainment options out there this summer, if beer and music aren’t your thing (though they should be). Ol’ Paula Poundstone will be tickling funny-bones, Fiesta Days will be fiesta’ing, or you can pan for gold at the Gem and Mineral Show. Whatever your vice, this summer has it, so go ahead and start makin’ your plans.

Just make sure you invite us out every once in a while, OK?

Courtesy of The Cannondolls; www.thewailinjennys.com

»» The Cannondolls (left) play at Rochester Hotel July 4. The Wailin’ Jennys play Community Concert Hall at Fort Lewis College July 24.

June 15

Paula Poundstone Community Concert Hall, Fort Lewis College, 7:30 p.m., $25.20 to $34.00, durangoconcerts.tix.com When it comes to comedians, you’d be hard-pressed to find another one like Paula Poundstone. She’s ruled the stand-up stage for decades, thanks to her dry, quick-onthe-draw style and love of interacting with the crowd.

She has a disarming, unexpected style to her stand-up, and that rapid fire wit has earned her a place on many a

stage, from The Tonight Show with Jay Leno to a spot on the weekly NPR comedy news show. Host Peter Sagal has called her “the funniest human being I have ever known. Everything she does, thinks, or says is hilarious.”

So do yourself a solid and snag some tix to Paula’s show at Fort Lewis. Your funny bone, and abs, will thank you.

June 28

Albuquerque-based band known for blending just about every style to concoct a harmonic rock sound all their own. And you get to do so for free, thanks to the Concert at the Park series, which runs throughout the summer at Buckley Park. These guys are a little bit country, a little bit blues, a little bit rock ‘n’ roll, and a whole lot of soul. You don’t want to miss this one.

Trust.

The Noms

June 30

Buckley Park, 5:30 p.m., free Lucky you. You get to check out The Noms, the

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Summer Brew Beer & Music Fest

Purgatory Resort, 1 p.m. to 7 p.m., $15, purgatoryresort.com/events/summerbrew/

grab them. All. Now.

State 38, J. Calvin’s Funk Express, and Elder Grown?

Yes, yes, and double yes. That lineup is great, but things get even better when you take into consideration that those bands will be playing at Purgatory’s Summer Brew Beer & Music Fest, which means there will be copious amounts of cold golden ale at your fingertips WHILE these bands play.

The Cannondolls at Rochester Hotel

Beer garden tickets are only $15 bucks, and there are only 300 of them to go around, so you should

July 4

Rochester Hotel, 5 p.m., free All-girl Americana is awesome. (So is alliteration), and you can catch that all-girl talent at the Rochester Hotel on the Fourth of July, when The Cannondolls, and their Continued on Page 14

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[summer] From Page 13

ripe harmonies, take the stage. And you can do it all fo’ free. What a win. As a bonus, The Cannondolls will also be playing at Buckley Park for free on the same day.

July 5

Afrosonics Buckley Park, 5:30 p.m., free If you’re looking for original, Afrosonics is where it’s at. The band mixes a healthy dose of African and American rhythms with a vibrant backing of guitar, drum, dance, chant, and keyboard fusion. And what we mean by that is that you haven’t heard anything like this before. Afrosonics pulls from all of the world music, from Caribbean, funk, jazz and blues, to other regions far across the globe. Their sound is the epitome of fusion, no label needed. Check them out for free dollars at Buckley Park. You won’t regret this life choice.

July 6

Gem and Mineral Show La Plata County Fairgrounds, 10 a.m. to 6 p.m., $2 for adults, kids under 15 in the company of an adult are free, durangorocks.org.

Do you like shiny things like the glitter-loving crab from “Moana”? Well, then you’re in luck, because the Gem and Mineral Show at La Plata County Fairgrounds features all things shiny, from rocks and gems to pearls, minerals and beads. Come dig for (slightly buried) treasure at the vendor booths while your kiddos pan for gold or learn about gems and minerals.

Your glittery wrists will thank you.

July 7

Music in the Mountains Locations vary, times vary, runs through July 29, ticket prices vary by event, musicinthemountains.com Music in the Mountains is a massive summer music festival featuring topnotch musicians that not only entertain, but educate and interact, making this festival a true learning experience.

You can catch acts like The Hunts, an indie-folk band from the southlands of Chesapeake, Virginia, or The Nightowls, a ten-piece ensemble that Austin Monthly named a “band to watch.” And,

Courtesy of Stillhouse Junkies

»» The Stillhouse Junkies play at the Rochester Hotel Aug. 8. to top off those sweet, sweet tunes, you can even indulge in a variety of artisan desserts – chocolate-based desserts, no less – at the Chocolate Indulgence tent. Where do we sign up?

July 12

Ukefest All-Star Band Buckley Park, 5:30 p.m., free Who doesn’t love the sweet, sweet sound of a ukulele? Nobody, that’s who. And you can check out a cacophony of ukes at the July 12 Concert in the Park, which will feature the Rocky Mountain UkeFest All-Star Band pluckin’ those uke strings in tandem.

That alone was good enough to sell us on this show, but as a bonus, it’s free.

July 19

I Draw Slow Buckley Park, 5:30 p.m., free You probably haven’t seen Dublin-based roots band I Draw Slow perform live, and that’s a shame. But you can remedy that – for free – at the July 19 Concert in the Park, because I Draw Slow will be there to put their mix of roots and Irish music just for you on display. Between

the expert songwriting and onstage chicanery, you’ll quickly see why I Draw Slow just landed a contract with Compass Records. You NEED to see them take the stage (or the grass), and revel in their folksy storytelling.

July 23-29

Fiesta Days Downtown and the Fairgrounds, 9 a.m. to 10 p.m., runs through July 29, $12 Adults; $6 Children 6-14; 5 and under free, durangofiestadays.com Everyone loves a fiesta, and Durango has their very own version of that raucous party with Fiesta Days, a celebration of history and heritage from the Durango area. This fiesta has been rockin’ and rollin’ since 1935, and these days, the party stretches across an entire week. There will be parades, rodeos, and chuckwagon cook-offs, along with street dancing and pie auction. We call dibs on rhubarb.

July 24

The Wailin’ Jennys Community Concert Hall at Fort Lewis College, 7:30

p.m., $22.50 to $48.00, durangoconcerts.tix.com If you haven’t heard The Wailin’ Jennys live, you need to get to it right away.

And if you have heard The Jennys, you should still make time to catch them this summer, because these Jennys -Nicky Mehta, Ruth Moody, and Heather Masse – are one of the coolest folk acts out there, with vocals that go on for days. Literal days. These guys have conquered the folk-roots scene, and their live performances are part of the reason they’re on top of the folk world.

I.e., they’re pretty badass indeed.

July 26

Halden Wofford & The Hi Beams Buckley Park, 5 p.m., free Just call them Honky-tonk Halden Wofford and the Hi*Beams, because this Colorado-based retro act sure knows how to throw a Front Range party. They’re the real deal, these honky-tonk warblers, and their distinct-but-throwback vibe has landed them quite a bit of press, including a gig on the famed NPR show “A Prairie Home Companion.” If you like Western

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Jerry McBride/BCI Media file

»» The San Juan Brewfest returns to Buckley Park Aug. 25. swing and a little Texas honky-tonk, you’ll love these guys.

August 4

Pine River Brewfest Eagle Park, Bayfield, 12 p.m. to 7 p.m., $30 to $175, children 12 and under free, bottomshelfbrewery.com If you like beer and BBQ, you should probably snag some tickets to Pine River Brewfest out in Bayfield, because that’s what this festival is all about. You can sample craft beverages, hang out at the BBQ cook-off, or take in some sweet live music. Even little Junior can tag along, because there will be plenty of children’s activities to go around, meaning everyone will be entertained and happy.

August 8

Stillhouse Junkies Rochester Hotel, 5 p.m., free Everyone loves the Stillhouse Junkies, and you’ll love them even more if you make time to catch them as they play the Secret Garden at Rochester Hotel. Their blend of roots, funk, swing, and blues will be just the antidote for those end-ofsummer sads you have. The music is free, the kids can join in, and you can rock out to your heart’s content. Don’t pass it up.

August 12

Asleep at the Wheel Community Concert Hall at Fort Lewis College, 7:30 p.m., $27 to $40, durangoconcerts.tix.com

Asleep at the Wheel, the Austin, Texas-based country band with a whopping 10 Grammy Awards, 20 studio albums, and a massive pile of chart-topping singles, will be gracing Durango with their presence in mid-August, and you should be there. The band’s most recent release -- Grammy Award-winning “Still The King: Celebrating the Music of Bob Wills and His Texas Playboys” – is a big, big album, one that features collaborations with legends such as Willie Nelson, Merle Haggard, and George Strait, along with The Avett Brothers, Amos Lee, and Old Crow Medicine, among others. That all-star album lineup should tell you something. These guys are awesome, and even cooler still is that these days, Asleep at the Wheel is traveling as an 8-piece band, with a couple of new musical additions to help round out that already top-notch sound. All hail the fiddles.

August 25

San Juan Brewfest Buckley Park, 1 p.m. to 5 p.m., $35 to $75, SanJuanBrewfest.com/tickets If you’re a beer-lover after our own hearts, do not miss San Juan Brewfest.

It’s the largest beer-tasting festival this side of…well, the mountains, and about 50 breweries will be on site to satiate your thirst. Each brewery will have in tow at least two of their beers, meaning you get to pick from about 100 beers. On top of that, there will be live music and food for you to get your grubby beer-filled hands on. Sounds like the perfect day to us.

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[Odd Rot, by Patty Templeton]

[review]

The Bay Dream strain is, well, kinda dreamy This week, we got our sticky hands on Bay Dream, a strain that’s brand spankin’ new to Prohibition Herb. The strain is a sativa hybrid, and is a cross between two favorites, Blue Dream and Bay 11. Bay Dream will be hitting Prohibition’s shelves for the very first time this week, so you might want to hurry and get your ass up there if you’re interested in trying it out. This gon’ be good. It will also be gone if you aren’t working with the quickness.

“The More You Ignore Me” Patty Templeton digs drawing to the crackle of a Woodwick candle while sipping brown rice tea. Find her randomry on Twitter via @PattyTempleton or at instagram. com/pattytempleton.

So, about Bay Dream: The first thing I noticed was that this is a pretty little plant. The buds are dense, and as one might expect from its genetics, this strain has a really pretty, complex color scheme to it. The buds pull the blue-ish undertones that Blue Dream is known for, and there are shiny green tones and bright orange hairs layered in.

Kinda dreamy, eh? (Sorry.)

This strain kinda smells like a dream, too. Stick your nose up to it and you’ll find it’s piney and clean, kind of like a winter forest candle. After grinding it – which was bittersweet, because the bud was just so fresh and fine-lookin’ – it was apparent that pine was the heaviest note in the mix.

I hate to keep going with the dream theme, but it’s pretty fitting. Everything about this strain was light and airy, including the taste. The smoke Bay Dream emitted tasted fresh and herbal, and it wasn’t that heavy pine taste I was expecting based on the smell. My notes say, “This weed tastes so good.

Happy weed, happy, happy weed.”

Unlike this weed, the documentary I was watching on pangolin slaughtering prior to smoking was NOT happy.

I assumed it was fine – Vice documentaries are effing baller while stoned (all hail General Butt Naked) – but this was not made by those surly hipsters at Vice, and it was a major misstep.

I guess I’d been living in oblivion, unaware that people eat pangolins, which look like a baby armadillo/dinosaur hybrid and are at serious risk of becoming extinct. Learning of the underground trade of those cute dinos was horrifying, especially while stoned.

(The documentary also went through a shop that offered pickled baby goat wine. Do not watch this documentary while smoking Bay Dream. Strike that.

Do not watch it EVER.)

Details Where to find Bay Dream: Prohibition Herb, 1185 Camino Del Rio, 970-385-8622, prohibitionherb. com Availability: Currently available on recreational (as of this week, fools!)

Caveats: Prohibition Herb sent us some Bay Dream, but didn’t bribe us (or warn us about the hazards of stoned documentary-watching).

Documentary aside, Bay Dream proved over and over to be pretty badass. The high kicked in super quickly, and my legs, arms, hands, and other extremities were super tingly after a few hits. That’s my favorite feeling, because everything feels so alive. The high vacillated between a cerebral head high and a body high, but neither dominated over the other. Rather, the two worked in tandem simultaneously, which put me in a great mood.

It also gave me a serious case of the munchies. While I probably don’t need to eat the entire bag of Lay’s Dill Pickle Potato Chips, it’s fine. If it’s for Bay Dream, I’ll buy them in bulk. I found myself mechanically shoveling chip after chip into my mouth, and after I’d exhausted my chip stash, I found some Snack Packs I had stowed some away in my fridge for just this occasion. I was extra happy (happy weed!) when I found them.

Pudding is delicious.

Maybe people should just replace their pangolin habits with pudding, and their old strains with some Bay Dream instead. Unlike that Netflix documentary, this strain, and those chocolate Snack Packs, were pretty darn killer.

—— DGO Pufnstuf

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[review]

Golden Goat, a sticky, fruity, amped-up sativa What’s orange and dense and green all over? Golden Goat, the sativa strain we’re reviewing this week, which comes to us courtesy of Good Earth Meds in Pagosa Springs.

I’ve had this strain in my hot little pocket for the last couple of weeks, but I wanted to save it until I could think of a way to toss in a G.O.A.T. reference. That clever joke never did come to fruition, so I’ll just tell you that when I see the name, all I can think of is Golden G.O.A.T., or Golden Greatest of All Time. Luckily it lives up to that title, or this strain review would be a real disappointment.

Rumor has it that Golden Goat’s origins came about purely by mistake.

According to legend, this strain originated in Topeka, Kansas (weird, right), after a Hawaiian-Romulan hybrid accidentally pollinated the Freak Island Sweet Skunk mother plant. Naughty, naughty. From that illicit affair came Golden Goat, which was supposedly named after the sticky soda syrup smell emitted by Golden Goat Recycling machines in the middle of summer.

I guess the idea is that Golden Goat smells a bit syrupy and sweet, so there’s a parallel with the recycling machines. I don’t really get it – Golden Goat smells nothing like soda syrup to me – but I also wasn’t the one who was allowed to dub this strain with its moniker, either.

The strain smells more to me like a mixture of tangy, sweet fruit extracts, kind of like grenadine syrup and lemon extract collided. There are some minty notes in there, which helped temper it and keep it from being too sweet.

Interestingly enough, the plant tastes nothing like it smells. There are no sour cherry notes or even minty aftertastes.

Rather, the smoke it emits is very earthy, and tastes a lot like damp earth smells. I was actually kind of relieved to find this out, because I bought a disposable vape at a dispensary in Fort Morgan recently, and unbeknownst to me, it was made to taste like peach. Have you ever smoked peach weed? That shit scarred me for life.

The effects of this strain were even more surprising than the taste. After

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about four hits, it proved to be a very racy sativa, the kind that can cause anxiety or paranoia if you aren’t careful.

(I was careful.) It was a euphoric racy, so I was stoked to be doing... things... but I wasn’t prepared for the swift kick in the ass it gave me. I was ready to go, man.

It was perfect for hanging out with a friend and watching the 416 Fire from an area entirely too close for comfort. I was happy, a little scattered, and felt like one of those little wind-up toys, chattering teeth and all. I also had plenty of theories on how to put out the fire. All of them were nonsense.

It was a couple of hours before the mellow come-down took over and I passed out stone cold on the couch. If you are more of a mellow stoner, this is not your jam. Not unless you want to clean the kitchen, forget you’re cleaning the kitchen, and then clean the kitchen again. But don’t you worry; those of us who like those amped up sativas are more than happy to take your share of the Golden Greatest of All Time.

Details Where to find Golden Goat: Don’t go searching the mountains. Go to Good Earth Meds, 600 Cloman Blvd. #1, Pagosa Springs, 970-731-3202, goodearthmeds.com

—— DGO Pufnstuf

Getaway and experience the relaxation of Pagosa Springs with a deep soak and Good Earth Meds.

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[advice]

Life Hax | Carolyn Hax

Hook-ups with jerks never work out Last night, I received my umpteenth call from my sobbing, devastated sister (mid-20s) over yet another semihookup-flirty-thing guy that didn’t work out. He is moving away and she found out via an announcement at work, not from him.

This is a years-long pattern. She falls for jerks – i.e., they consistently bail on plans, girlfriends still in the picture, conveniently call only on weekends – then is utterly devastated when it doesn’t work. She’s convinced she is “unlovable,” “boring” and “ugly” even though she is a beautiful, smart, funny, successful, athletic, kind and thoughtful person. She says things like, “I can’t do this anymore,” and, “I don’t want to do life if this is how it’s going to be.” I’ve tried tough love but she is so fragile she falls apart all over again; I’ve tried comforting her and telling her what she wants to hear, but I think that reinforces the problem.

Do I keep on with tough love or continue to be her shoulder? This is breaking my heart and I am so worried for her.

Tough Love or Shoulder?

What is your definition of “tough love”? Because it’s hard to think of anything tougher, long run, than hearing only what we want to hear.

In that spirit, my thoughts: 1) There isn’t much bystanders can do to help. It’s an incredibly common problem, painful to watch and stubborn as hell.

2) Telling people what they want to hear is never the answer unless there’s a gun to your head or they’re on their deathbed. (OK, maybe there are a couple of other exceptions, but I’m near the end of my week and I want to go out in a blaze of hyperbole.) Telling people what they want to hear is at its core an act of disrespect. It’s: “You can’t handle the truth!”

3) With jerk-dating patterns, it’s never about the jerks or any given jerk – so if you’re talking about a particular guy, you’ve already lost the battle and

are losing the war. The problem is your sister, full stop.

4) The problem isn’t that your sister isn’t lovable. It’s that her picker is broken: What attracts her to someone is out of alignment with what is healthy for her.

5) I can’t identify the emotional problem behind that problem because I don’t know her – but she can, if she has the courage. Big if. The one thing I know for sure is that she seeks out what feels comfortable and familiar to her emotionally (because that’s pretty much what we all do), even though in her case what is familiar is not healthy.

6) A good therapist could help her identify what feelings are familiar, what part of that familiarity backfires on her, and why.

So – what does this mean for you?

Not much that feels productive or satisfying, alas, but it’s worth a try: Call her back to say, “You’re not unlovable, boring or ugly, as you know. But I think you also know on some level that you’re repeatedly choosing people who – for whatever reason – aren’t healthy for you. You’re drawn to certain feelings like a drug and these guys supply it. I hope you’ll consider talking to a therapist to find out why.”

We share very thin walls with our neighbors and, this week, I found out the husband lost his job. This has caused all kinds of additional stress on top of an already scary, difficult situation. They’ve been fighting – loudly – since he’s been home more.

We barely know them, and I have no idea what to do. I’ve literally never spoken to the wife.

Do I acknowledge we’ve heard the news? Leave a bottle of wine for them? I would send them a week of meal kits, but I don’t even have their email. I feel so awful and know how stressful this is, especially with a baby.

Neighbor Be neighborly, but as you would if you didn’t know way too much. Cook

something and, whoopsie, realize a double batch was too big after all: “I made way more chili than we can use.

Would you like some?” That will also crack the door figuratively to more regular neighborly exchanges with them, if they’re receptive. (If not, you back off unless and until you hear an emergency through the walls.)

You can’t solve their problems, but you can be, if they’re receptive, a small source of comfort at an uncomfortable time.

My best friend from college is one of the most honest and loyal people you could ever meet. She’s an amazing attorney, a devoted mom, a very good friend and a really mean wife.

She and her husband are visiting me right now and it’s painful to hear the scathing tone she uses with her husband and the constant stream of criticism and orders she directs at him. It seems to be all about control and putting him down, right in front of me and my partner. Her husband is annoying and has his own faults, but no one deserves to be treated this way.

I love my friend but this has concerned me for a long time; they’ve been married four years. I’m convinced that if I bring it up I will hurt her and risk the relationship. But it also feels wrong to be a silent witness – and if I can’t talk to her about this, who will? What should I do, and how should I do it?

you OK? Is there anything I can do?”

If she’s under stress and dumping it all on him, which is what your description suggests and is also quite common – though it’s abuse, make no mistake – then compassion is your best chance of coaxing her out of this angry, defensive place.

You may still hurt her and the friendship, of course. However, turning a blind eye to abuse just to preserve your comfort zone is not a choice that withstands moral scrutiny.

Even if you weren’t close but still haven’t distanced yourself – if, say, you were a colleague or neighbor or some other acquaintance of proximity with limited options for walking away, or if you believed there was enough good in her to give her a chance – then you’d still have a bystander’s obligation to come forward. Saying something light in the moment, like, “Wow, tell us how you really feel,” can both break the tension and send the message that her tone has crossed a line.

It can help just to be openly nice to a victim, too (especially true with kids).

“Here, let me help you with that,” or, “Tell me about your new job.” Cast your lot with humanity.

If this all seems frustratingly careful, that’s because it is. Abusers use isolation to their advantage, so while there’s always a point where principle demands cutting ties, there’s value in walking a line until then, one that keeps you involved without enabling.

If you can’t say something, then who will?

Plus, people in the gray area between mensch and monster – the ones with histories of warmth and decency who have lately veered into anger – need more loving people in their lives, not fewer. More people to help carry what’s weighing them down. At least give her this chance to recall the person you’ve known her to be.

“Best” friend means you voice your concern – and you make it about her.

Take a walk with her alone and get to it: “I’m worried about you. You’re one of the best people I know, yet you’re so openly rough on Husband that it’s almost like you’re possessed by someone else. Are

Carolyn Hax is a syndicated advice columnist for The Washington Post. She started her advice column in 1997, after five years as a copy editor and news editor in Style and none as a therapist. Email her at tellme@washpost.com.

Conflict-Averse but Concerned Friend You’ve answered half of your own question (thank you, by the way):

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[happening] DGO picks in and around Durango

Thursday Thursday senior bike ride, 9 a.m., Santa Rita Park,

Veg out

149 South Camino del Rio.

Find fresh local produce and other goods that are good FOR you on the opening day of the Mancos Farmers Market. Shop to live music, purchase crafts, and buy all the fibrous veggies you can carry.

Qi gong and tai chi by the Animas River with Tyler VanGemert, 10

Details: June 14, free, 4 p.m., Mancos Farmers Market, Mancos, facebook.com/ mancosfarmersmarket

Swine song Atkins-approved R&B, soul, funk, and hip-hop band Bacon plays in the garage at Ernie’s for your Friday night fired enjoyment. Belly up to the bar or hit the dance floor, and don’t be afraid to tip the musicians. The group promises not to splatter hot grease on you.

Details: June 15, free, 7 p.m., Ernie’s 1101 Main Ave., 11thstreetstation.com

Distilled debut Local band Stillhouse Junkies have become known in the Durango community over the past year with their genre-blending material, which is rooted in bluegrass. They are finally releasing their first full-length album, “Over the Pass,” this week, and are hosting a free listening party at a distillery. We had a feeling whiskey would be involved.

Details: June 16, free, 7 p.m., Durango Craft Spirits, 1120 Main Ave. #2, stillhousejunkies. com

Apple jam Catch local band Farmington Hill deliver “country-fried indie rock” at Fenceline Cidery in Mancos this weekend. Greek food truck Yia Yia’s will be serving gyros and other treats to be enjoyed with a crisp apple cider, good times, and good vibes. Rotten apples stay home.

Details: June 16, free, 6 p.m., Fenceline Cider, 141 S. Main St., Mancos, outliercellars.com

Stage presence Prince may have been born with sexy swagger, and Bowie’s shape-shifting style was a stroke of genius, but can it be taught? Non-profit iAm Music launches their youth summer workshop series, Funky Bootcamp, to teach the young sponge minds of Durango about performance and style. Maybe the next Elvis walks among us.

Details: June 18-22, $150, youth, 5:30 p.m., iAm Music, 1315 N. Main Ave., iammusic.us

Magic Mary Jane Mary Jane’s Medicinals, a multi High-Times award-winner for best topical products, will be hosting a pop-up at Telluride Bud Co. – Durango this week.

Learn about the organic products and take home sample salves for $1. Just don’t eat the salves.

Details: June 20, free, 4 p.m., Telluride Bud Company, 3473 Main Ave., maryjanesmedicinals.com

a.m., $10, White Rabbit Books and Curiosities, 128 W. 14th St. Toddler story time,

10:30 a.m., Durango Public Library, 1900 East Third Ave., 375-3380.

Durango Chamber of Commerce music festival, noon, $10, St. Mark’s

Henry Stoy piano, 11

a.m., Jean Pierre Bakery and Wine Bar, 601 Main Ave. Route 358, 5 p.m., Balcony Bar and Grill, 600 Main Ave. Black Velvet Duo, 5 p.m.,

DoubleTree Hotel, Animas River Cafe, 501 Camino del Rio. Kirk James, 5:30 p.m.,

Digs Restaurant and Bar, 125 Mercado St. Ben Gibson Acoustic Duo, 6 p.m., Sky Ute Casino

Resort, 14324 Highway 172, Ignacio.

Kirtan with Band of Now, 7 p.m., Yogadurango,

Episcopal Church, 910 East Third Ave., 247-1129.

1485 Florida Road.

Teen time, 1 p.m., Durango

Honey Hawk, 7 p.m., 11th

Public Library, 1900 East Third Ave., 375-3380.

Street Station, 1101 Main Ave.

Ben Gibson Acoustic Duo, 5 p.m., DoubleTree

The Raven Narratives: Live Storytelling, 7:30

Hotel, Animas River Cafe, 501 Camino del Rio.

p.m., $15-$20, Durango Arts Center, 802 East Second Ave., 259-2606.

Burger and Band Night: Wild Rose Gang,

5 p.m., $20, James Ranch Terraces, 33846 U.S. Highway 550.

Safari Night, 5 p.m., Hima-

Eliminator: ZZ Top tribute band, 8 p.m., Sky

Ute Casino Resort, 14324 Highway 172, Ignacio.

layan Kitchen, 992 Main Ave.

Sunday

Free Concert at the Park: Michaela Anne,

Four Corners Pet Expo,

5:30 p.m., Buckley Park, 1250 Main Ave.

9 a.m., $5, La Plata County Fairgrounds, 2500 Main Ave., 749-5582.

Friday

Pit-A-Billy meet-andgreet cruise in, 11 a.m.,

Preschool story time,

Ska Brewing Co., 225 Girard St.

10:30 a.m., Durango Public Library, 1900 East Third Ave., 375-3380.

Kids Club, 1 p.m., Durango

Adult coloring and afternoon tea, 3 p.m., White

Rabbit Books and Curiosities, 128 W. 14th St.

Summer grief program for kids, 9 a.m.,

$200, Durango Arts Center, 802 East Second Ave., 2592606.

Guide Dog Meet and Greet, 10 a.m., Pine River

Library, 395 Bayfield Center Drive, Bayfield, 884-2222.

Social dance lessons,

6 p.m., $10-$12, Red Scarf Studio, 121 W. 32nd St.

Tuesday Summer Reading Performance, 10:30 a.m., 1

p.m., Durango Public Library, 1900 East Third Ave., 3753380.

Baby story time, 2 p.m.,

Durango Public Library, 1900 East Third Ave., 375-3380.

Purgatory Sports ride,

6:30 p.m., Purgatory Sports, 2615 Main Ave.

Wednesday Clean Commute Week,

7 a.m., Durango.

Story hour, 10 a.m., James Ranch Terraces, 33846 U.S. Highway 550.

Early literacy play date, 10:30 a.m., Durango

Public Library, 1900 East Third Ave. Story time, 11 a.m., White Rabbit Books and Curiosities, 128 W. 14th St. Old Fort Farm Stand, 1 p.m., Fort Lewis College, Student Union, 1000 Rim Drive.

Gary Walker and Faith Evangeline piano and vocal duo, 6:30 p.m., Jean

Public Library, 1900 East Third Ave., 375-3380.

Durango ukulele jam,

Screen-free playtime in the garden, 2 p.m.,

4 p.m., Magpies Newsstand Cafe, 707 Main Ave.

White Rabbit Books and Curiosities, 128 W. 14th St.

Ben Gibson Acoustic Duo, 4 p.m., Wines of the San

Open house event, 3

Juan, 233 Highway 511, Blanco, New Mexico.

7 p.m., $20, Eagle Sound, 403 County Road 238.

Live kung fu dubbing,

Ongoing

p.m., CryoMedSpa, 1800 East Third Ave., Suite 101.

Ben Gibson Electric Band, 5 p.m., Balcony Bar

5 p.m., Durango Brewing Co., 3000 Main Ave.

and Grill, 600 Main Ave.

Black Velvet Duo, 6 p.m.,

Kirk James Band, 6 p.m., Durango Harley-Davidson, 750 S. Camino del Rio.

Cyprus Cafe, 725 East Second Ave. Joan Osborne, 7:30 p.m.,

Pierre Bakery and Wine Bar, 601 Main Ave. Getting Paid to Talk: An Introduction to Professional Voice Overs,

Old west stage shows are held at 5:30 p.m. nightly throughout the summer at Bar D Chuckwagon, 8080

$65-$75, Henry Strater Theatre, 699 Main Ave., 3757160.

County Road 250. Cost is $12-$38 and reservations are preferred. To reserve, visit www.bardchuckwagon.com.

p.m., $28-$34, Fort Lewis College, Community Concert Hall, 1000 Rim Drive.

Monday

Submissions

Volunteer training, 9

Saturday Four Corners Pet Expo,

a.m., Court Appointed Special Advocates of the Southwest, 102 W. 18th St.

9 a.m., $5, La Plata County Fairgrounds, 2500 Main Ave., 749-5582.

9 a.m., downtown Durango, Main Avenue.

Submit events for the next week online by noon Monday at www. swscene.com. DGO publishes events online and in print every Thursday.

Bacon, 7 p.m., 11th Street

Station, 1101 Main Ave. Paula Poundstone, 7:30

Million Mask March,

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Horoscope ARIES (March 21 to April 19) You feel flirtatious this week! You want to have fun! Surprise invitations to parties and social get-togethers will please you. A new romance might begin.

TAURUS (April 20 to May 20) You might suddenly entertain at home this week. (Stock the fridge.) Some will discover a real estate opportunity or a chance to make where you live look prettier.

GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) You will enjoy schmoozing with others this week, especially siblings, relatives and neighbors. New faces and new places are exciting, and you’re full of new ideas!

CANCER (June 21 to July 22)

Bizarro

Be on the lookout for new ways to make money this week because they exist. You also might spend money

impulsively, especially on pretty things.

Keep your receipts.

LEO (July 23 to Aug. 22) This is an exciting week because you are impulsive and ready for anything that interests you. You want to be stimulated by others! You don’t want to be bored.

VIRGO (Aug. 23 to Sept. 22) This is a restless week for you because you have that feeling like you’re waiting for the other shoe to drop. There’s a lot happening around you, but you choose to be safely behind the scenes watching it all.

LIBRA (Sept. 23 to Oct. 22) You might meet a new friend this week, or it’s possible that someone you already know will do something wild and crazy. (This week, people are impulsive and unpredictable.)

SCORPIO (Oct. 23 to Nov. 21) Surprise news from your boss or a parent will please you this week. Perhaps it’s a promotion. Perhaps your workspace is improved. People will say good things about you this week.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22 to Dec. 21) An unexpected opportunity to travel will fall in your lap this week. Act quickly because this window of opportunity is brief.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22 to Jan. 19) Keep your pockets open because surprise gifts, goodies and favors from others will come your way this week. If something is offered to you, accept it quickly because this offer is brief!

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20 to Feb. 18) Your partner or close friend will do

something that throws you for a loop this week. Something out of the blue will catch you off guard. Get ready.

PISCES (Feb. 19 to March 20) Good news at work! This could mean a raise or praise. You might get new equipment or something high-tech might be installed. Things are exciting!

BORN THIS WEEK You love to travel because you want a fast-paced, stimulating life. You think fast and love to express your ideas. You will welcome this year because it’s a year full of excitement and stimulation!

Embrace change and new opportunities. Be prepared to act fast. Your personal freedom will be a top priority. You also will travel this year and do things that expand your horizons.

Enjoy this busy, fast-paced year! © 2018 King Features Syndicate Inc.

Music festival mayhem Jerry Garcia gripes Creedence Clearwater Revival was the first big band to sign on for Woodstock, but they ended up getting screwed with a 1:30 a.m. time slot that followed (of all bands) the Grateful Dead. “Wow, we got to follow the band that put a half a million people to sleep,” CCR frontman John Fogerty said.

Kans-ass Believe it or not, there is a rock festival in Kansas that is known as Kanrocksas, which is a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad name.

Greek (festival) mythology Coachella may think its the top dog of music festivals, but the Greeks have it beat by at least 3,000 years.

In Greece, music festivals can be traced as far back as 10th Century B.C., making the Greeks the original hipsters.

Posthumous performance No, Tu-Pac did not rise from the dead to perform at Coachella in 2012, but he was still the first artist to perform from the grave, thanks to his hologram, which was projected on stage with Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre.

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ARTY PARTY

DGO photo contributor Lucy Schaefer dropped herself in the midst of beer, ink, and art of all kinds the Your Flesh Tattoo & Piercing party over the weekend. For more photos, go to dgomag.com

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2018

DURANGO PRIDE

JUNE 21 – 24

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