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toys Too many
What to do with playthings that no longer get attention
By Melissa Erickson More Content Now
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ho doesn’t love to see a happy child gifted with a new toy? After the initial joy wears off, though, families are often left with cluttered playrooms stuffed with unused playthings. No matter how thoughtful, some toys simply go to waste. While suffering a modest decline in 2019, toy sales are expected to pick up again in 2020, according to the NPD Group’s The Future of Toys report. Specific estimates for 2019 were not available, but toy sales for 2018 peaked at $21.6 billion. That’s a lot of video games and action figures, building blocks and balls.
Before you donate Families spend an average of $7,620 on toys by the time their kids reach age 12, of which $5,182 is wasted on toys that are rarely used, according to a recent study commissioned by ToyLibrary. Just under 70% of parents report they have many toys their children rarely use, and on average, each child owns 57 toys but uses only 18 of them. Adding to the issue is that many toys are made of cheap plastic that is unable to be recycled. Plastic toys often end up in landfills, said Eloisa Orozco, spokeswoman for disposal company Waste Management. “Plastic toys are not acceptable items through Waste Management’s curbside recycling program. One of the ways consumers can reduce the amount
of toys from ending up in the waste stream is to consider donating them to local organizations,” Orozco said. However, when donating toys people should check the Consumer Product Safety Commission (cpsc.gov) guidelines to ensure there are no recalls, said Lauren Lawson-Zilai, senior director of public relations at Goodwill Industries International. Donate toys and games in their full
form, including all pieces and parts. Include batteries, if required, and check that they are in working order, she said. “Consumers should not donate broken items or items that have been recalled, banned or do not meet current safety standards. If consumers are unsure, they can visit the Consumer Product Safety Commission” site, Lawson-Zilai said.
Choose better toys Having too many toys are overwhelming to children, said Marie Hartwell-Walker, psychologist and marriage and family therapist and the advice columnist for PsychCentral.com’s Ask the Therapist feature. “With too many toys, children will become obsessed over a few toys and ignore others. They can’t choose what to play with as easily. It’s better to have more open space and creative toys” than too many toys, Hartwell-Walker said. What makes a good toy is as easy to explain as what makes a bad toy. “A bad toy is easily breakable, loseable and makes noise,” Hartwell-Walker said. While both child and parent are disappointed with a broken or lost toy, a toy that makes noise is “doing the job of imagination,” she said. The best toys encourage creativity and imagination, such as books, art supplies, construction toys, play vehicles and things that make music, Hartwell-Walker said.
When buying for others When parents and gift givers consider toy purchases they often think of whether the toy is fun, safe, educational and age-appropriate, but people should also be mindful of the message the gift conveys, Hartwell-Walker said. “Gifts send a message and reflect something about the relationship between the giver and receiver and their values,” she said. “Remember who you are as part of the gift but be sensitive to who the child is.” When buying for others’ children, be sensitive to how a parent is raising their child. Don’t give a gift that pushes a different value system on a child such as an anatomically correct doll or a toy gun if the parents wouldn’t approve.
How to make
SLEEP a priority for kids
By Melissa Erickson More Content Now
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he battle over bedtime is being waged nightly. Whether kids want to stay up late to do homework, play video games or attend sports and other extracurricular activities, school-age children need a consistent bedtime. No matter the age, children report improved alertness, energy, mood and physical well-being when enjoying healthy, consistent sleep, said Dr. Shalini Paruthi, a member of the American Academy of Sleep Medicine and co-director of the Sleep Medicine and Research Center at St. Luke’s Hospital in St. Louis. “A sleep schedule is incredibly important for children of all ages. Having a good bedtime routine helps ensures sufficient sleep. Plus, kids love to follow routines,” Paruthi said. A bedtime routine helps kids ease into sleep. “It’s hard for the brain to go, go, go, and then to stop and sleep,” Paruthi said. A nightly routine allows a person to decompress from the day and can include a light snack, brushing teeth, reading books, a warm bath and, most importantly, going to bed at a consistent time. The American Academy of Sleep Medicine recommends children get the following amount of sleep on a regular basis: • Infants 4 to 12 months: 12 to 16 hours (including naps) • Ages 1 to 2: 11 to 14 hours (including naps) • Ages 3 to 5: 10 to 13 hours (including naps) • Ages 6 to 12: Nine to 12 hours
“We often think that there’s not enough time for everything, but if we prioritize sleep — getting enough good quality sleep — it helps us be more efficient, effective in all the other parts of our lives.” Dr. Shalini Paruthi
• Ages 13 to 18: Eight to 10 hours These recommendations are based on more than 800 research studies are are associated with better health outcomes including improved attention, behavior, learning, memory, emotional regulation, quality of life and mental and physical health, Paruthi said. Not getting enough sleep leads to issues with attention, behavior and learning problems as well as the risk of accidents, injuries, hypertension, obesity, diabetes and depression. Insufficient sleep in teenagers is associated with increased risk of self-harm, suicidal thoughts and suicide attempts. One of the most common questions Paruthi hears in her practice is, what should parents do when something like a band concert or a special occasion disrupts a child’s sleep schedule? “Keep the routine but speed it up,” Paruthi said. So if you normally read three books before bed, read one, or read three but at a faster pace. Older children, in middle and high school, need to learn to prioritize sleep. “We often think that there’s not enough time for everything, but if we prioritize sleep — getting enough good quality sleep — it helps us be more efficient, effective in all the other parts of our lives,” Paruthi said. Without good sleep, mood is the first thing affected. People become cranky and unhappy, Paruthi said. The next loss is speed; it takes longer to complete tasks. Lastly, we lose accuracy, Paruthi said. With different sleep needs for each child, making sure that everyone goes to sleep on time and gets the sleep they need can be a challenge. To help, the American Academy of Sleep Medicine has created an online bedtime calculator (sleepeducation. org/healthysleep/make-time-2-sleep-bedtime-calculator) to determine a customized bedtime based on each individual’s age and needed wake time.
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Little Miss N
avee Bleu - G randma’s Girl! Getting ready to Bake some Cute C akes
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Addison r new hat Trying on he
CUTEST KID IN EJC
By Melissa Erickson
their newfound skills is a huge ego boost for kids. “It’s essential that they are praised and thanked for executing these chores — they will feel appreciated and more willing to continue doing it and expand to other things,” Beresin said.
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hores are responsibilities, but they’re also opportunities for kids to learn how to care for themselves, others and the home they live in. “Chores” may have a negative connotation, so it’s preferable for parents to reframe chores as performing routine tasks around the house or to help the family, which build skills and habits needed for later in life, said Gene Beresin, executive director of the Clay Center for Young Healthy Minds at Massachusetts General Hospital. “When kids are given the time and space to take responsibility for themselves, it allows them to set their own chores — learning a musical instrument, playing on a sports team, becoming a school or community leader,” Beresin said. “Taking responsibility for oneself teaches kids that they need to acquire the knowledge, attitudes and skills for activities they feel passionate about. And the joy and positive feelings around mastery is really important for kids of all ages.”
Learn in stages Children don’t suddenly know how to cook a family meal; parents have to teach how basic chores are done in stages. “For example, young kids can start by carrying their dirty dinner plate to the dishwasher for an older
Little ones can help “As soon as kids can walk and communicate, they are able to help with responsibilities around the home,” Beresin said. For example, young children can fill up a pet’s water bowl, water houseplants or put toys into a bin before dinner.
Seeing CHORES as learning opportunities sibling to put in. Then as a schoolage child, they can help with cooking dinner — stirring a pot of pasta sauce or adding ingredients to a bowl. Then when they approach teenage years, they can start to take control in the kitchen and cook the meals (with an adult in the background for support), or when driving, help parents by picking their younger siblings from school or by shopping,” Beresin said.
Capable equals confident A chore itself may not be fun, but children feel special when they assume responsibilities, Beresin said. All children desire to be competent, capable and effective at mastering skills that they previously could not accomplish. “This adds considerably to their self-esteem and to their sense of efficacy in their world,” Beresin said. Knowing that they are valued, admired, respected and praised for
Leave time to relax Kids are pulled in many directions. They need time for social-emotional learning and to manage responsibilities in other settings such as school, sports and community obligations. “It is incredibly important that kids have plenty of time to relax and be kids,” Beresin said.
The bottom line “There are plenty of important responsibilities at home, for oneself and in community settings. Some are great fun, some are not. When we help kids learn that an important part of life is assuming responsibilities, and they understand the value and necessity for this, they can feel that they are making a contribution to the betterment of all. And this feels really good,” Beresin said.
FREEPIK.COM
Creative
play
‘Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood’ puppeteer recommends more unscripted, interactive toys By Melissa Erickson More Content Now
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hen top trending toys include robotic tumbling hedgehogs and Nerf guns with “Fortnite”-branded darts, do simple puppets stand a chance? They sure do, said psychologist, educator and puppeteer Susan E. Linn, author of “The Case for Make Believe.” “Creative play: First of all it’s fun. Creative play is a window into children’s hearts and minds. It’s a way to express themselves that’s safe,” said Linn, founder of the Campaign for a Commercial-Free Childhood. Linn’s pioneering work with puppets as therapeutic tools to help children cope with illness, hospitalization, death and other life challenges made her internationally known, but she is also remembered for her several appearances on “Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood,” with Audrey Duck and other puppets. “He was a mentor to me throughout my career. I met him at 19. I worked with his production company to create videotapes on difficult issues such as racism for children in grades one to three,” Linn said. Puppets can be an outlet. “Puppets give kids ways to wrestle with life, ways to figure out new ideas and behaviors, ways to understand rules. They can help prepare kids for the future and understand the past,” she said. No two children will play with a puppet the same way because when children play creatively, they play based on what they’re thinking or worried about, Linn said. In one form or another puppets have been around forever, and they’ve been used to spread political messages historically, Linn said. “They’re powerful because they are simultaneously real and not real. They speak, but they’re not actually people.
They are symbols of people,” she said. That may be heavy, but puppets can also be used to help kids express feelings, learn values and model healthy behaviors, Linn said.
Anything can be a puppet “You can make all sorts of things talk,” Linn said. Getting a child dressed? Slip socks on your hands and have them argue about which one gets to go on first. Have the dinner peas call out to be eaten first.
Modelling good behavior Puppets work best for children when they’re uninhibiting and the play is spontaneous, candid and relaxed. “Puppets can give children control over things in life where they do not have much control,” Linn said. Make the puppet younger and less smart than the child, Linn said. That way the child can help teach the puppet about bedtime, how to share toys or other family fundamentals.
You don’t need to be an expert While Linn is an expert ventriloquist, parents don’t need to rise to that level. It’s perfectly acceptable to use a regular voice or — even better — let the puppet whisper in your child’s ear. Allow the child to take the lead. “A good toy is 90% child and 10% toy. It just lies there until a child picks it up and transforms it into something,” Linn said.
Overcome the challenge “Today’s kids are not used to creative play. Kids are so used to not responding, not actively talking back or creating. Puppets are interactive; screens are reactive,” Linn said.
“Puppets give kids ways to wrestle with life, ways to figure out new ideas and behaviors, ways to understand rules. They can help prepare kids for the future and understand the past.” Susan E. Linn
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