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Editorial Note: It is that time of year, and rainy season is again upon us, with its clear sunny mornings and afternoon showers, don’t forget your umbrella! Of course the land turns even more beautiful and lush, as the plants certainly like the change. It is time to listen to your surroundings, and see if you can detect the weather as the Indians still can..... On that subject, we will take a look at the Cabecars from down in the Talamance Range. This tribe is closely tied to the others found there, such as the BriBri, both in language and customs. It is unfortunate that these areas are losing their culture slowly, all the more reason we feel to bring you these articles before they are gone forever..... - Ryan Piercy

In May we will be updated about Cedula Renewals. Contact us for details.

This magazine has been published every two months for 12 years as the official communications media of the Association of Residents of Costa Rica. Our organization provides service to thousands of foreigners who have chosen Costa Rica to reside for short periods or for permanent residence. Since 1984 the Association of Residents of Costa Rica has been offering reliable SERVICES, INFORMATION and ADVOCACY to Costa Rica’s foreign residents. We have the experience and ability to help you with your residency application, immigration, business and financial management, real estate purchases and rentals, property management, insurance, pet importation and much more. If you wish to place an ad in El Residente, please contact the ARCR main office. Goods & services offered are paid advertisments. Neither ARCR Administracion nor El Residente research the companies and take no responsibility for the quality of such goods or services.

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card is replaced. See Eduardo, in our mailroom, for details.

Presidents Re epor t by The Board Another Year Another... Did you ever wonder what a billion dollars represents? If you are from the States, our politicians throw this number around all the time, as if it was just another number. I don’t know about you, but a billion dollars is hard to comprehend, but I ran across an article that helps me put this number into perspective. - A billion seconds ago it was 1958 - A billion minutes ago Jesus was alive - A billion hours ago our parents were living in the Stone Age. - A billion days ago no one walked on earth on two feet. - A billion dollars ago was 8 hours and 20 minutes, at the rate the US government is spending it. As my Dad use to say, “What has this got to do with the price eggs in china?” I don’t know, but if you are an Ex-Pat, I thought this might be interesting. Moving on too more important matters, ARCR continues to grow and offer new services. Our monthly seminar attracts people who are interested in moving to Costa Rica and usually 50% of them join ARCR even though they don’t currently live here. Speaking about the seminar we are moving to the Tennis Club, which is near Sabana Park. Seminar topics include: Real Estate, Forming Corporation and other legal matters, Shipping household goods to Costa Rica, Banking, Insurance which included health, car and house, Types of residency, IRS information, Learning Spanish, Cultural differences and Experiences of folks who have moved here. This is a two-day event that includes lunch, and I know I have mentioned this before, but I thought it was worth repeating especially since many attendees repeat this seminar. We also have two new services. First we can now rent you a cell phone, with line, in case you are having problems obtaining a line or if you have friends here for extended visits. The second new service will allow you to use our credit card to make purchases on line. You may ask, why would I need this? Well, one reason may be you have lost or had your card stolen, and this is a way to make purchases on line until your

We are also starting a new monthly event. On the first Friday of each month we will meet at the Las Mananitas Restaurant. This restaurant is 300 meters South of ARCR, diagonally across from the BCR and the meeting time is 12 noon. This will be a no host event, no formal agenda but from time to time presenters will talk on pertinent topics of interest to the group. The purpose is to bring members together to discuss common problems, discuss current issues and whatever else may be on their minds. Also we are now meeting for ARCR HAPPY HOUR once a month at Mac’s American Bar in Sabana Sur. Time is from 5-7, and our next get together is May 29th, come join us! I believe I mentioned in my last message that the Board was planning an April event at a park in Escazu. This has been cancelled, for this year, but we are working hard to make this event a reality next year. Speaking of the Board we are moving forward with our idea to develop a database of non-profit organizations that help children, families, individuals and seniors in need. Our objective is to be a resource center. Anyone in need would call us 24/7, we would be able to search our database and put the person in contact with organizations that could possibly help out. We have started this project, but we need help in two areas. First, do any of you know of such organizations? If so we need the following information: the Director’s name, where they are located, their phone number, what services they provide, what segment of the population they serve and do they have a brochure or pamphlets that explains their organization. Having this information leads to the second area of need. We need volunteers, who are bi-lingual, so they can contact and discuss our program with these organizations,, and ask if they would become part of our data base. Once we have a good cross section of these organizations we can put the project into action. If you can help, in either area, please contact me at ARCR. My e-mail address is arcr@casacanada.net or call me at 2233-8068. Also, remember we are starting our quarterly raffle this month and we have many great prizes. The tickets are only 1,000 colones and all the funds go into our Charity account. Come in and look at our poster board for details, and ask one of our knowledgeable staff workers for tickets. - Earl Tomlinson

Cover Painting by Carlos Cruz Rodriguez: Carlos Cruz often focuses on landscapes of Costa Rica, such as the typical scene found on this cover. Carlos has often helped us at ARCR and has donated several paintings for our raffles. His works can be seen on the internet at cruzarte.com, or at ticoclub.com/cpcaczb.htm (Send us your painting for one of this years covers to ARCR at rpiercy@arcr.net)

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Alcoholics Anonymous Groups meet daily throughout the country; times and places change frequently. Call for up-to-date information. San José 2222-1880 (Anchor club, also serves Narcotics Anonymous) Av 6 Calle 1, 2nd floor Maryland Building. Heredia (Laura) 2267-7466, Puerto Viejo Limon 2750-0080, Zancudo 2776-0012, Tamarindo 2653-0897, Flamingo (Don) 2654-4902, Manuel Antonio (Jennifer) 2777-1548, Jacó (Nancy) 2637-8824, Zoo Group Escazu 2293-4322.

Send us your club news or activities for free publication in this column

Al-Anon Meetings Al-Anon Family Group is for all family and friends of Alcoholics. For information in English, please call Martha 2483-1275 or Sandy 2266-1061; For Spanish please call Christine 8840-4658

Republican’s Abroad The Republicans Abroad of Costa Rica meets the second Tuesday of each month. Contact Francis 2203-6131, or or fax 2282-2150.

American Legion Post 12- Golfito Meetings are held 4 pm 1st Tuesday every month at Banana Bay Marina. The Golfito GOVETS have been helping Southern Costa Rica for over 20 years. Contact Pat at walkergold@yahoo.com or 2775-2809.

Radio control Sailing Club Meets at Sabana Park Lake. For information contact Walter Bibb. Wwbbsurf40@yahoo.com

American Legion Post 16- Heredia All veterans are welcome. Meetings are the second Tuesday of the month at Hotel America in Heredia at 12 noon. Contact Post Commander Jim Young or Post Adjutant Ken Johnson at 2591-1695. Bird Watching Club The Birding Club of Costa Rica sponsors monthly trips to observe local and migrant birds in various areas of the country. For more information contact us at 2282-5365 or at costaricabirding@hotmail.com Canadian Club (ACCR) Upcoming Canada Day Picnic, June 29th. 10am - 3 pm, with the venue to be announced. Keep an eye on our website for details, or contact us if you can Volunteer!! mermatt@amnet.co.cr website: www.canadianclubcr.com Democrats Abroad Democrats Abroad meets on the last Saturday of every month at the Aurola Holiday Inn, San Jose. Contact Paul Kloes, 22154254, e-mail cr.democratsabroad@yahoo.com or visit our website at cr.democratsabroad.org. Register to vote absentee at VoteFromAbroad.org! Little Theatre Group LTG is the oldest continuously running English-language theatre in Central or South America. The group currently puts on a minimum of four productions a year offering a choice of modern, classic, serious, and farcical plays. The group’s monthly social meetings are held in the theatre on the first Monday of the month from 7p.m. to 9 p.m. and everyone is welcome. Membership costs C 4,000 per person or C7, 000 per family. Also, earn your Wings, become an LTG Angel. For more information Call the LTG Box Office 8355-1623 or www.littletheatregroup.org Newcomer’s Club Newcomers Club of Costa Rica (for women) meets first Tuesday of every month, September through May. Call: Teresa Beck 2249-2673 or casafloradora1@yahoo.com PC Club of Costa Rica This computer Club meets on the third Saturday of each month at Pan American school, in Belen, 830 to 11:30 am 2 months Free Trial for newcomers. For information call Chuck Jennings. Phone 2266-0123 www.pcclub.net

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Tambor Gringos and Important Friends T.G.I.F. T.G.I.F. is a small social club open to those who speak English, including Costa Ricans, in and around the town of Tambor on the Nicoya Peninsula. Members meet at 9:00 a.m. the first Friday of every month at the Beachcomber Bar and Grill in Tambor. The meetings are very casual and provide a forum for exchanging ideas about life in Costa Rica. For more information contact rzldzll@earthlink.net Wine Club of Costa Rica Please mark your calendars The wine club usually meets at 1 P.M. on the last Sunday of each month. Join us to tantalize your taste buds and expand your education. For more information on upcoming events please contact us Phone 2279-8927, 2257-2223 Women’s Club of Costa Rica Founded in 1940. The Women’s Club of Costa Rica is one of the oldest, continuously operating service clubs in the country. The name has changed in 68 years, but our motto “friendship and service” has remained the same,. An English-speaking organization, our club has approximately 350 members, originating from over 30 countries. Please join and help us to continue to grow. Remember that you can contact us or keep in touch through our website www.wccr.org Women’s International League for Peace and Freedom (open to men too) Bilingual group meets in Heredia on the first Wednesday of the month at 10 a.m. in the clinic of Mireya Gonzalez. We work on peace and human rights issues. Call Mitzi 2433-7078 or write peacewomen@gmail.com Young Expats of Costa Rica Some Expatriates under the age of 40, and currently living in Costa Rica, have formed a new social club to be coordinated through their website This club will help younger expatriates living in, or moving to, Costa Rica meet other expats in their age group for; friendship, romance, travel and activity partners, and professional networking. www.YoungExpatsOfCostaRica.org Veterans of Foreign Wars: Post 11207 Meetings are held at 11am, the first Tuesday of every month, at Club Colonial Casino on the second floor. All members are welcome and veterans who served overseas may join. For info please call 2750-0453 or 2228-2313. For 2 day conference speaker list call Mel at 8870-6756.

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May-June, 2008

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A Day In Th he Life by Allen Dickinson

Accepting Costa Rican Traffic Jams. OR How to reduce your stress when a bus bumper is 10 inches from your car door. Some of we North Americans have a really bad stress reaction when we have to deal with Costa Rican traffic, particularly the traffic jams one encounters in busy urbane areas. “They come so CLOSE!” is a common complaint. And to we gringos, “close” translates to “unsafe.” Then we jump to the conclusion that Costa Ricans have no regard for safety and are, therefore, bad drivers. As a result of that assumption, when we drive and see them driving in what we take to be an unsafe manner, our stress levels go up. And up. And up. For some it becomes so bad that the idea of driving in Costa Rican traffic has become virtually unthinkable. Maybe, if we can understand one, small aspect of the Costa Rican culture and how it differs from our own, and thereby applies to driving, we can begin to realize that their style of driving is not as unsafe as our emotions tell us it is. And, if we can do that, then maybe we can reduce our own stress level in traffic. A caveat: It can be said that Costa Ricans have the highest highway traffic mortality rate of any country in the world. This article is not about traveling on highways or the back roads of Costa Rica where most of those deaths occur (though the same principles apply there to.) This article is about driving in congested traffic areas like any Costa Rican town city center.

Lets start with basics: First we need to understand that every person in every culture has been taught that they need a certain amount of physical space around themselves to feel comfortable. This is known as our personal space. This is also called our ‘comfort zone’ a phrase that has come to have multiple applications, but is a valid term in the sense that it defines the minimum amount of space we need to feel comfortable. Think of it as an invisible bubble that surrounds us all. The size of the bubble differs from person to person, and from situation to situation. It even varies from culture to culture. The size the typical North American bubble is a measurable distance. In general situations, our personal space tends to be about 1- 2 feet around our whole bodies. We all have a bubble and guard is jealously. Any invasion of that space, by anyone who is not a close friend or a family member, can make us have an emotional reaction - usually an anxious feeling. (Even a good friend or family member can do that to us, from time to time, though it’s less pronounced.) For strangers it a whole lot different. There are, of course, exceptions like sitting at a counter in a diner or standing at a bar. And we can handle crowds, like at a concert, for a while. But, even though our bubble can be reduced in those places, it is still there, just smaller. But, as long as strangers stay out of our personal space we are OK. When strangers coming unbidden into our bubble, however, it can make us feel more than a little ill at ease. Certainly you have experienced this when someone you have just met insists on standing too close while they talk to you. They are invading you personal space and that creates a feeling of tension. The usual reaction is to back away - to put a little distance between yourself and the other person, then everything is fine again. Getting too close, entering someone else’s personal space, can have a strong emotional as well as a physical reaction. You can see how this works with a simple test. The next time you are in a bar or restaurant with a stranger, slowly move something of yours towards the person sitting next to you. (This may not work if it’s a family member or friend - it needs to be someone outside your close family circle.) It can be anything, even as small as your coffee spoon or drink straw. Move it an inch towards them, wait a little while, then move it another inch. Repeat until results are achieved. What you will see is that at some point that person will begin to exhibit signs of discomfort, possibly even anxiety. Where it begins depends on the size of their bubble at the moment. But eventually you will find it and they will beginning to feel their space is being invaded, and will react. Responses can Continued on page 7...

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- without creating anxiety and stress for themselves or each other. Costa Ricans just don’t need the personal space that we do. To them, 6 inches between cars is as good as our 2-3 feet. By ‘trying to drive ‘up your tailpipe’ they aren’t being disrespectful or uncaring or, to them, unsafe - to them it’s OK to be that close - it is just a normal part of their culture. They feel just as safe to have a quarter meter between your vehicle and theirs as you do to having 2 meters. As far as a Costa Rican is concerned, not touching is not touching. And, if you think about it, any time there is no contact there really is no offense - except to our North American emotional feeling of the invasion of our personal comfort zone.

vary from the person becoming angry (so be careful) to them moving the item back into “your space”, to the person moving away or even leaving the table or bar! This concept of personal space also applies to our ‘things.’ Our homes, for instance. Have you heard of someone who got into a ‘turf war’ because a fence was 2-3 inches over a property line? Or two neighbors that got into a fight because the one person mowed across a property line? (I am sure it has never happened to the esteemed reader, but they might have heard of something similar happening to someone else.) These are all examples of violations of personal space. It can also be thought of a ‘territoriality’ but that word usually applies to larger areas. One of the prime things, which is subject to our sense of personal space, after our homes, is our cars. Ever have someone up north frantically honk a car horn at you in a parking lot for no other reason than you got within 10 feet of his or her car? It was because they felt you had entered their personal space and they were no longer comfortable. The amount of personal space we each need to feel comfortable can vary dramatically across cultures. Surely you have noticed how many Ticos walk arm-in-arm. Or how the tight crowds of people on downtown streets don’t seem to bother them. Nor does the crush of close seats on busses. And traffic! We say: “My gawd, the traffic jams! It all doesn’t seem to bother them!” We gringos have a problem understanding how having a vehicle within inches of our own, and creeping closer and closer does not create panic and invite road rage. But somehow, for Costa Ricans, it doesn’t usually elicit that reaction. And to us, that is amazing.

Maybe our North American culture developed our larger comfort zones because of our tradition of wide-open spaces. Maybe it was something else. Nobody really knows and it doesn’t matter. What we need to understand and respect, is the fact that the Costa Rican idea of personal space is different than ours and that when they are acting in context with their culture it is not disrespectful of us and ours. In the end, it really doesn’t matter what our culture’s standards are - when we are living and operating in their culture it behoove us to understand and adapt to it, not the other way around. And maybe, just maybe, in the process of developing our large personal space bubbles, we Norte Americanos have deprived ourselves of something wonderful the Costa Ricans still have - the frequent touch of other, warm, living, human beings. And if that is the benefit, the traffic jams maybe aren’t that bad after all. Once you get used to them! Allen Dickinson is a member of ARCR. After serving 23 years in the US Navy he settled in Pensacola, Florida, where he resided for 24 years. In 2006 he retired from operating his own licensed mortgage brokerage business and relocated to Costa Rica. He holds a Bachelors Degree from the University of New York and a Masters Degree from the University of West Florida. He can be reached via email at: humphree@bellsouth.net

Costa Ricans, like many other cultures around the world, haven’t developed the need for as large a personal space bubble as the average North American. Consequently they can walk arm in arm, ride a bus crammed together, or pull their car up to within a few inches from another person’s car

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Retreats Co osta a Rica by Rosemary Rein 911 Sloth Rescue- Costa Rica Today we visited Costa Rica’s Sloth Rescue Center located near Cahuita, Costa Rica. It certainly will be a tour stop for our upcoming Women’s Retreat in October and a top recommendation for those wanting to experience what I believe is the “Real Costa Rica.” As I said yesterday in my post, I believe a woman should rescue a sloth at least once in her lifetime (humans excluded) and so today Barry and I set forth on a quest: Rescue a sloth or at least support those doing the job everyday in the jungle.

environment. “In some cases, deforestation forces starving mothers to abandon their babies and search for new homes. Sometimes people kill the mothers out of fear or ignorance or cruelty. Sometimes mothers are poisoned by agrochemical and fertilizers and sometimes the babies and the mothers are simply to afraid to retrieve them for fear of people and dogs.” * In any event, the orphaned babies raised in captivity will never have the skills necessary to survive in the forest and must live in the sanctuary since Mom teaches them what they need to know to survive. So here we have one couple, without government funding, that decided to do something. Just do something. They began a foundation and tours to support care of the sloths and now have 14 full-time employees and numerous volunteers acting as guardians of these incredible creatures who are faced with the perils of development. So, what’s the skinny on sloths? Here’s perhaps a few facts you might not be aware of: 1. They are not bears and they are not lazy! They are members of the Xenarthra order, along with armadillos and anteaters. 2. They have staying power....They have been around for 60 million years! Longer than any business I know. That’s adaptability. 3. They are not all the same. Get your Three-Toed and Two Toed Sloths Right. Visit the center and learn about the important differences. 4. They have Skills against Predators. They smell like vegetation which serves as a form of camouflage and yes, they move slowly in daylight, but at night they can move swiftly when need be. 5. They don’t take alot of bathroom breaks! In fact they only leave the tree-tops once a week for that function. PS: They don’t smoke either. Talk about productivity.

We had heard about Luis and Judy Arroyo, a couple who literally changed their destiny with the arrival of an unexpected guest. Judy from Alaska had met Luis, a Costa Rican and together had opened a bed and breakfast inn that showcased a birding paradise. But they would turn from Innkeeper to Keepers of a different kind when one day neighborhood girls brought them “An orphaned three toed sloth” who they would give the name Buttercup. Eventually dozens of sloths arrived at the center, when the community learned of the couple’s care and study of Buttercup and other One cannot visit the rescue center without a sense of “three and two towed sloths” who were found abandoned or responsibility to these amazing and gentle creatures. What can you do to help? injured. Today, Buttercup sits for visitors to see on her special “Queen 1) While in Costa Rica, rescue a sloth when you see them on Chair” and even offers a handshake as if to say, “thanks for dangerous roadways and the center can tell you how. 2) Visit the Center They also have a hotel and gift shop which stopping by and yes, I started it all” support their work. As a visitor to the refuge, you can take a magical boat trip of 3) Adopt a Sloth this Holiday Season. What could be a more the area’s birding paradise, enjoy lunch and an educational lecture about the sloth and their peril due to their changing Continued on page 9...

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special gift than giving a gift of a Sloth? Since, they don’t care much for city living, we recommend that you send a donation to Aviarios Sloth Rescue Center. (You can adopt a sloth for amount of $100 or more) and your recipient will receive a photograph and other goodies which Buttercup has personally approved of. 4) Even though the name implies one of the 7 deadly sins, remember sloths are an amazing gift from nature and deserve our respect love and protection! Please visit their site today! www.slothrescue.org Rosemary Rein is the author of “Go Wild! Survival Skills for Business and Life” and a new book to be published in January 08 with Dr. Stephen Covey and Ken Blanchard entitled “The Blueprint for Success and Survival” Her website can be found at www.retreatscostarica.com Buttercup Foundation -----------------------------------------The Buttercup Foundation takes its name from one of the first sloths that we rescued and who has become the mascot and symbol of Aviarios. You can read more about the Buttercup Sloth Rescue Center by clicking here. Buttercup is not only a principle member of Aviarios but she has also helped biologist in the research of sloth behaviors.

GOALS: Educate the public to be individually responsible for its effect on the environment. OBJECTIVES 1. Create school programs in which children of all ages throughout Costa Rica and the world visit Aviarios Wildlife Sanctuary and rescue center to learn firsthand about their environment and the animals they share it with, especially the sloths. 2. Raise funds to buy the remaining portion of the island in the sanctuary, and when that is fully protected, to buy more land adjacent to Aviarios for protection. 3. Create an ongoing exotic wildlife veterinarian scholarship fund for Costa Rican veterinary students to travel abroad to study exotic wildlife medicine and return to work in Costa Rica, specifically at Aviarios. 4. Create a scientific research center for the study of sloths at Aviarios.

If you would like to know more about the work we are doing MISSION: Teach the world to love the rain forest and understand why or would like to make a donation to support our efforts don’t hesitate to email us at SlothSanctuary@gmail.com we must protect it for the generations to come.

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Learning The Language e by Christopher Howard

“How Ya Doin?” As you probably know by now, to ask somebody how they are in Spanish you say “Cómo está usted?” or more casually “Cómo estás?” It is customary to answer these questions by saying “muy bien”, which means ‘very well’, or by responding “mal” which is ‘bad’. However, just as we find in English, there are in reality many different ways that these questions can be replied to. In this lesson we will show you some ways you can use. The next time someone asks how you are, you can respond with the following vocabulary, after starting with the phrase “Estoy…” (I am…) Be certain to use the correct usage of the masculine or feminine, depending on whether you are a male or female….

fantástico (fantástica)* bien mal regular nervioso (nerviosa)* deprimido (deprimida)* ocupado (ocupada)* preocupado (preocupada)* triste feliz contento (contenta)* cansado (cansada)* débil fuerte así-así

fantastic well not well o.k. nervous depressed busy worried sad happy content tired weak strong so-so

(*men use ‘o’, and women use ‘a’) You can also add more emphasis to the words above by placing the following words before them; tan = so;

muy = very;

un poco = a little;

demasiado = too

For example; Estoy muy cansado – I am very tired; Estoy un poquito cansado – I am a little tired. Here is your Costa Rican expression or tiquismo for this week: “Estar detrás del palo” is used when a person doesn’t understand something. El hombre está detras del palo.

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they needed she provided, and she cooked for them, and fed them, and cared for them all.

Legends Compiled by ARCR Sta aff

White Stone

However there was one young Indian who fell in love with woman. He watched her movements, and listened to her beautiful soft voice, which made his heart race with excitement. One day the young Indian could not help himself any more, and suddenly caught her unawares at a place where she had been alone. In that moment her hair was swept back, and he saw her face completely.

If you ask members of the tribes in Talamanca about the origin of the world, many will reply with the story of white In that instant the woman suddenly disappeared, and in the stone. This story has been passed down through the place she had been standing started forming a large clear generations since before recorded history…. lake. Out in the center of the lake stood a solitary white stone, upon which often can be seen a gray-brown bird. Sibo, the greatest of gods, created the world with the help The Indian of the region say that this lake still exists in the of the animals. Amongst these was the Great Bird, who fed Cordillera Talamanca to this very day. They also believe that on the fruits of the gods, then rose up high in the air over the the bird that visits the stone, depending on which direction it earth, and from its excrements were created the continents, faces, will foretell them of the days to come, and whether the the forests, and even the mountains of the world. Also as she news is good or bad. When the bird is facing towards the flew, a piece of the gods fruits also fell from her beak, from north, it is a sign of the coming of summer. When it is facing which was formed the first peoples. towards the south it means the rains are about to start, and bad weather is coming. Bird created amongst the others one woman, who then took care of the Indian men. However it was forbidden by the The white stone plays such an important role in their society, gods for the men to see her face. They knew she was a that it even affects the destiny of every child born amongst woman by her soft voice, and her long dark hair, which fell them. The hands of the child are checked to see that they down around her head and obscured her features. are not held in a tight fist. If that is the case the child is able to hold a piece of white stone, which the Indians believe was The men lived in great happiness, for they didn’t need to work placed in the mothers lap by god. Such a sign means the or hunt, and the woman looked after their needs. Everything child should be chosen as a priest in the future.

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Letters to the Editor Was it Worth it?

Also, badly needed for these Howlers are “monkey bridges” (rope strung across critical areas of danger) at known monkey crossings that would help protect them from traffic but also from electrocutions on power lines. Unfortunately, around the Arenal and Tilaran area, that project isn’t a popular one. However, even with monkey bridges, blatant disregard of others in the road is never an excuse to drive heedlessly. It shows selfishness and only results in tragedy.

As I sit cuddling a frantic, crying, grief stricken baby Howler monkey in my arms, probably 6 weeks old, the victim of a careless driver who killed his mother; I just have to ask the question of the driver: “Was your speed and haste worth the untold grief of a dying mother Howler monkey?” Now a distraught orphan is left behind Was it worth it? The driver had to know he hit her. Had to have heard her scream in agony. Felt a thump. And yet, he left her fatally injured body dying beside the road, and an infant, still suckling, who could not survive without her.

And so now, once again, I am caring for a tiny grief stricken crying baby who has lost his mother. We struggle together to try to get him to accept baby formula for human babies that just doesn’t taste like “mom’s” milk, from her soft warm nipples, sometimes resulting in a tummy ache. And now he must sleep alone, snatched way too soon from the comfort and security of his warm mother who gave him all of her love and care. We surrogate “Mom’s” are a poor substitute for his natural Mom who always knew just what he needed. And sadly, not all of the little infants survive. No matter how hard we try, sometimes the stress and diet change are just This accident occurred on the curve of the road near Tilawa too much resulting in diarrhea, illness and death. This brings hotel on the road that connects Tilaran and Arenal Costa me back to the unanswered question “Was your speed and Rica, on Friday afternoon of February 1 of 2008. You know carelessness worth it?” if you were driving there during that time and you know I am speaking to you. I don’t know you, but you need to know the Gloria Dempsey, member 3943 untold grief you have brought about due to your selfishness Zoologist, Arenal, Costa Rica and carelessness and disregard for any life but your precious time. Dear Gloria (& Jim) Had it not been for a vigilant Taxi driver carrying two tourists who encountered the accident minutes afterward, who Happy to publish your letter & help ask people to slow carefully rescued the tiny enfant frantically trying to cross down! If anyone out there can help Gloria’s cause in the road, the tiny monkey would have been dead as well. Arenal, please contact the editor... Afterward, the little one was brought to me to save. This type of tragedy occurs far too frequently. What are drivers thinking? How can they not be aware of the fact that on our roads in Costa Rica, vehicles are not the only travelers? Driving in Costa Rica is a challenge to say the least. If you are a Tico, you were born here and so have many years of experience in the roads. You are already aware of all the obstacles that can occur on the road. You are aware that our mountain roads are full of many blind curves which can surprise you with stray horses and cattle lined up peacefully strolling in your path; as well as little children and their pets ambling across the road, broken down vehicles, and yes, troops of Howlers and other wildlife who simply want to cross the road to follow their feeding routes. So, if you haven’t already slowed down as you approach those curves ready to react to whatever could face you on the other side, shame on you! You know better! If you are a tourist, driving in a foreign country on a rugged mountain road with road signs in a foreign language, in an area that is totally alien to you, should be enough to make you ever vigilant and careful. If you weren’t, I am saddened by the tragedy of your neglect killing our precious wildlife and know also that next time could be your life if you hit an oncoming bus.

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May-June, 2008

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Tribes of th he Land by Ana Hernandez

The Cabécars The inhabitants of the Land of the Quetzals Research and study of old civilizations are topics chosen by historians and anthropologists as a way of bringing us, the non- “history buffs” types, in contact with information about significant events that have shaped and affected us all in one way or another as members of the human race. History in the academic sense may be a subject of unique interest of academicians, but also thanks to the efforts of historians and their written accounts of past events, we are able to have an open window in which to see glimpses on how our ancestors lived, socialized, loved each other and fought against one another. Most importantly, History makes us aware of the legacy given to us by the people who lived before us, and how such legacy becomes a crucial part of our present identity.

words from the Chibchan language: Kabé (quetzal) and ka (place) meaning the place of the quetzals. The Cabécars have also been commonly known by the names of the geographic zones where they live. Those living in the Chirripó region are known as chirripó and the ones living in the Estrella Valley are known as estrella. The Caribbean tribal groups were highly mobile people. In their search for new food sources and answering to the need for trading, they crossed the mountains seeking the fertile watersheds of the Pacific. Some families settled temporarily along the edges of the Río General in the Pacific, where they cultivated vast areas with plantains and lived in huts surrounded by tall pejibaye trees, (peach palm fruit) which provide them with plenty of nourishment. The men of the tribes organized hunting and fishing expeditions that took them from one coast to the other. Many of them returned to their originals settlements with superb specimens of mollusks that were used as sacred objects in their rituals.

Eventually, some families in the Caribbean side moved permanently to the highlands of the Pacific where they established new settlements and towns. Nowadays, both groups live in the townships of Buenos Aires, Turrialba, Matina and Talamanca. There are six known Cabécar reservations: Nairi-Awari, Chrirripó, Tayni, Telire and Talamanca-Cabécar on the Atlantic and on the Pacific side, Ujarrás. The Cabécars numbered approximately 8,300 at the time of the 1990 census, though that number could have augmented because I have learned quite a lot while doing research for this current of new migration patterns and intermarriage. series on the Indigenous groups of Costa Rica, although it has not been an easy task. One, for the lack of written resources The Cabécars were traditionally organized in clan lines and on the subject and the other, for the pain I have experienced ruled by the useköl or kpa, the highest ranking chief who when learning about the injustices committed against our decided on strategic matters when natural catastrophes, crop natives ancestors, in this country, and everywhere else. failures or famines occurred or when tribes’ settlements were threatened We have chosen to take a closer look at by wars. This ruler lived in the Upper the Cabécars from the Great Talamanca Coen region known presently as San Region; to learn a bit more about José Cabécar and was the supreme them, where do they live and about spiritual leader, regarded as sacred. The the significance of their unique cultural next rank in the hierarchy was held by contribution to this country. the blú, known as king, who acted as the executive chief in charge of foreign I have purposely separated the relations and security matters. Cabécars from the Bribris for the sake of this article but it is important to note that The building of the Pan American Cabécars and Bribris have lived in very Highway in 1945 created a huge close contact to one another and have impact in the every day lives of these shared the same geographical region indigenous groups affecting their for several centuries before the arrival of culture and traditional ways. A sudden the Spaniards. Both groups are located massive immigration of non-indigenous in southeastern Costa Rica along the citizens took place with the opening of Atlantic and Pacific watersheds of the the interstate and land set aside for the Talamanca Mountain Range, though natives was bought or claimed by the they speak different languages. newcomers. Ethnic conflict and dispute The term Cabécar comes from two

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over land ownership and other rights soon arose and remains so today in many instances between indigenous and whites. Modern Cabécar communities are sparsely populated in rugged terrain with no roads; their dwellings are built far apart, some within a distance as far as three kilometers from one another, over half- an hour walk at a brisk pace. They have poor water sources with no filtration systems. Poorly drained ditches and standing water is a common problem in their neighborhoods and the proliferation of the Dengue mosquito represents a serious threat to their health. Unfortunately, hospitals and health clinics can be up to 8 hours away or more. Due to this lack of medical services, about 95% of them depend on plant remedies or visit a “jawa” or shaman when sick.

It is hard to realize how devastating the impact of new arrivals has been on all indigenous groups and their habitats. Members of predominant societies of higher economic status have always approached native cultures with a mix of superiority and ignorance. Ancient political systems based on clan hierarchy, rituals and other important cultural traits that had been nurtured for centuries, have been eradicated almost completely and are now written in the history pages and in the best of cases, passed on to the newer generations as oral accounts from some tribal elders.

A few families continue to build rectangular and oval thatched-roof huts and some have tried to revitalize tradition by building conical huts such as the ones their ancestors in the past used to live in –a living quarter that better reflected their connection with the Cosmos. With the increase in population, less forests and less land for agriculture, the thatched-roof huts and large huts raised on stilts are being replaced by the painted frames houses built close to one another near the plaza and the municipal buildings, like anywhere else in rural Costa Rica. Several of these newer homes have access to water and electricity.

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Wild Side

XX XXX XIIII

by Ryan Piercy

Legendary Bird I found it interesting that in the study of the Indians here, often animals such as birds crop up in the stories with great frequency, much as they do in North America. The first people were close to their natural surroundings, and animals were of great importance to daily life. The Mountain Robin tends to nest in a solitary tree near a forest, high up and well concealed. The nest has a darkroot base, difficult to detect, with a middle lair of dry bamboo leaves, firmly under a roomy cup of green moss. They will lay 2-3 blue eggs usually between March and June. This Robin can be found from S Mexico to W Panama, including in the Talamanca range of course. In flight t has a high, thin call, and sings frequently, possibly especially when they sense rain is near, as many of the yiguirro are supposed to.

In the legend of Whitestone, a gray-brown bird is mentioned, which got me to thinking, which bird was referred to? Perhaps a small hawk? Or for the area, it does seem possible that a Mountain Robin could have been the bird in question. It even falls into nationalism somewhat, as the Robin, or Yiguirro, is Costa Rica’s national bird.

This last leads me to believe that the Talamanca Indians probably heeded close attention to these birds. I recall from my youth in Canada that my grandfather used to come inside, telling us it was about to rain. When we asked how he knew, he simply told us he had been talking to the Raven. I have no doubt that the forefathers of the Cabecar and BriBri also ‘spoke’ with their Robins, or kept watch at Whitestone, and listened carefully as to what the weather was going to be like….

The Mountain Robin (Tardus plebejus) tends to withdraw from the higher elevations at the height of the wet season, to below 900 meters, returning to the higher elevations in January. This migration also certainly seems to fit with the legends weather forecasting as to when the rain would begin. Aside from being called Yiguirro de Montaña, it is also known in Spanish as the Mirlo montañero. It reaches about 9.5 inches, or 24 cm. It is somewhat grayer than the claycoloured robin, with a black bill. These birds like to frequent tall mountain forests, more commonly left alone in the high, inaccessible ranges around the country. They also favor the adjacent clearings, moss-covered trees, or outside breeding season flocks will visit berry-laden trees and forests as well. This because they like to feast on seeds and berries, foraging on large branches, and also on the ground for insects and other vertebrates.

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May-June, 2008

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First Nation n s Ar t by Ana Hernandez

The Cabécars Art Expression Art expression usually goes hand in hand with religious expression. Just as it has been the case with most local Indigenous groups, the Cabécars of modern days, have been converted to Christianity. They are either affiliated with the Catholic Church, with several other Christian denominations including the Baha´i Faith. Aware that acculturation at all levels have distant Indigenous people from their traditional beliefs, some native activists have tried to revive their original artistic expressions. Cone shaped dwellings that represented a closer unity with the universe are being built in some reservations and tribal members continue to consult with local shamans who serve as intermediaries between the Creator and each individual member of the tribes, in some cases with the aid of ritualistic chants.

dyed material has been practiced and maintained throughout the years by the women in their communities. Artisans carve masks with intricate designs out of the Ochroma wood, many representing the diablitos of their traditional celebrations. Some artisans make baskets, cord bags, hammocks, gourds and drums decorated with forest animals and elegant bows and arrows from the wood of the peach palm tree (pejibaje.) They sell their crafts to tourist and non-indigenous people out of their homes or on the roads to their villages. Many of these products are bought directly by intermediaries and sold in upscale shops in San Jose and larger tourist towns where they command large prices.

Cabécars believed that all social norms come from the Creator and that all creatures of nature are spiritual beings. Of all the groups that survived the Spaniard cultural invasion, the Cabécar have some of the most intricate spiritual ways of dealing with disease, birth and death. The tradition of using a shaman to officiate at all of these events is still alive and well among them. Along with the Boruca and Bribri, the Cabécars also participate in the Fiesta de los Diablitos, a celebration where a player representing the Spaniard, puts on a carved bull head while other players representing little devils also wear carved masks and colorful clothes while trying to run away from the bull. More traditional members perform a dance from ancient stories related to them about their ancestors’ close relationship with forest animals. Many of their arts and crafts exhibit a close connection with nature. The tradition of making cotton textiles with natural

May-June, 2008

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Travel Log by Bill Read

To Beat A Volcano Although I have been a regular runner - and more recently a walker - for more than 25 years, not since I was a kid at summer camp in Maine have I tried climbing any mountains (and those were 4000 feet high at most). Thus except for Volcán Barva north of San José, my experience with higher altitude hiking has been nonexistent - until last June when I tackled Volcán Turrialba with a group. So in July I started some serious training for higher elevations such as Chirripó, at 3820 m. (12,530 ft), Costa Rica’s highest. Except for a knee problem which slowed me up in October, since then my goal has been to complete a least one 4-6 hour hike every other week at higher altitudes than where I live here in San Pedro at 1300 m., about 4300 ft. — and this in addition to the everyday walks.

on a generous helping of fruit and granola I had brought along.

As I started up the paved road (if you want, you can drive all the way to the top) the sky was clear blue. The difference of at least 15ºC (~27ºF) in temperature between sun and shade in the early morning really surprised me. A fluffy white blanket of clouds covered the valley far below, a truly memorable sight. And what a joy it was to strike up a At the beginning of last December I was free for a couple of conversation with a smiling, bashful six-year old on his way days. So I took off by bus for Cartago, a half hour east of to tend the cows. I doubt that anyone had ever told him not San José, another bus up the slopes of Volcan Irazú to Tierra to talk to strangers! Blanca (alt. 1970 m./6900 ft), and from there hiked for almost two hours in the late afternoon up to the last village above In 1994 there was an explosion, which created landslides, that, San Juan de Chicuá. but more renowned was the eruption, which lasted two "The book" says not to hike alone, but this was a welltraveled road on which there would be help available if I happened to twist an ankle. I had covered 8 kilometers (5 mi.), climbed over 600 m.(2100 ft), and was very tired and very cold, thanks to the thin air and a steady drizzle. The hostel room was unheated - it must have been close to freezing - and the bed left much to be desired; thus, I was far from refreshed when I arose before 6:00 and breakfasted

years and began on March 13, 1963, the day that President Kennedy landed in Costa Rica for an official visit! Thus, the soil there is very fertile due to the ash from the volcanic activity. Consequently, you can see potatoes, onions, and carrots being harvested even above 3000 m. (9800ft), mostly by young Nicaraguans who come to find work that is not available at home. I passed by small herds of milk cows almost that high up, but understandably there were none of the Brahman cattle you see at lower altitudes. About the altitude: A slight headache bothered me the first day, and then only at the beginning the next morning. I found the exertion required was more or less a function of the incline before me. When it was steep (not more than 30 degrees) I would climb until the pain in my thighs reached a certain threshold, and then rest for 30-45 seconds. But never was I gasping for air or breathing very heavily. The road was paved so the climb was steady, and smooth underfoot. On those stretches that were flat or downhill I felt just as if I were at sea level. As the morning wore on, the clouds rolled in. Thus, sadly there were no sweeping vistas to behold but at least there was no rain or wind. Thanks to the exercise I was not cold. Continued on page 21...

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However, I would have been miserable without my winter Chicuá was uneventful. The slope was not so steep that my gloves and, for a while, a fleece jacket. legs got much more tired than they already were. Including my 15-minute stay at the top plus rest and snack stops, up The summit, at 3432 m. (11,260 ft), was crowned by a virtual and back it had taken me just seven hours to cover the 24 forest of radio, TV, and microwave relay antennae. When km. (15 mi) and all of it above 2740 meters (9000 feet), not the clouds permitted, I could see a small lake, bright green bad for a 77 year-old youngster. sulfurous in color, maybe 1000 feet below at the bottom of the principal crater (there are five). Otherwise … not a sign Tourists zooming by in their cars must have wondered what of life. possessed that lonely soul trudging along with his backpack. But I had a treasure they had not: I had conquered the "Peak Except for a light drizzle at times, the hike back down to of Thunder", Irazú..

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Dollars & $en nse by Alan Weeks

One should also keep in mind, when considering China’s huge import demand for most agricultural products that, during the reign of Mao Zedong, their agricultural base was totally ruined. China is now spending huge amounts of money trying to rebuild its agricultural sector.

Another source of new demand is coming from the heavily subsidized biofuels industries in both the US and Europe. The worst case example of this could be the grossly inefficient use of corn in the US to produce ethanol as a substitute for It is hard to forget about the continuing increase in gasoline. (This will be expanded upon in a later section.) demand and tightening supply of oil, especially when the consumption of oil in the Emerging Markets is In fact, biofuels are expected to ‘eat up’ about a third of forecast to exceed that of the US this year for the America’s 2007 grain harvest. This not only impacts the price first time. However, let me leave this interesting of corn and grain-based food products, but also the price topic and its probable consequences until the next of meat, with prices for livestock feed also increasing. Did you realize that it requires 16 kg of grains for animal feed to article. produce 1 kg of beef? According to several reliable sources, soaring oil prices will The enormity of the misguided, subsidized, use of corn to pale in comparison to the looming global food crisis. produce ethanol can be recognized by the reported fact The problem of overcoming food shortages is also that “the amount of corn needed to produce ethanol to compounded by the fact that most available agricultural fill the gas tank of a car is equivalent to the amount a land has already been planted. As Donald Coxe warned, family would need for food for a year”. That means the “It’s not a matter of if, but when, it’s going to hit hard skyrocketing biofuel demand for grains will only make a small dent in the consumption of oil for gasoline. this year”.

FORGET OIL, THE NEW GLOBAL CRISIS IS FOOD

It has been reported that, after a 25 year run of declining food-related commodity prices, the food sector is now in the second year of an upturn that could last 20 or more years. This huge increase in demand for food is not coming from the US consumer, who could hardly eat any more food.

Thus, the combination of the new Asian appetites and the grossly inefficient diversion of corn and grains to produce biofuels, is going to show up in the form of substantially higher food prices. This will definitely be far more noticeable and painful to far more consumers than rising energy costs.

And, while sharp grain price increases have occurred in the Already in the US, crude food prices rose 22% last year and past, this is the first time it has been caused solely by finished consumer foods were up almost 7%. Now, get ready: “Breakfasts [and all our meals] are going to get much insufficient supply to meet real demand. more expensive”. Food price increases are also tied to high fossil fuel prices. This is because these fuels are important raw materials in The relatively new food shortage problem is also changing everything from fertilizer & diesel for tractors, to the fuels for the import/export dynamics of many developing and transporting all basic food products to every market. Then, underdeveloped nations. Remember, it was not long ago that there were strong demands made to the World Trade we package the foods in petroleum-based plastics. Organization and the developed nations from many of these WHERE IS THE SUDDEN INCREASING DEMAND countries, who were then trying desperately to sell their food stuff. COMING FROM? One very significant source of growing demand is that hundreds of millions of people in Asia, have moved from poverty over the last decade, and are propelling rapid urbanization. They’re eating twice a day, instead of once. They are adding to the demand for food staples, - as well as once unthinkable luxuries like meat.

Now, there are already embargoes on food exports; by Russia and India, for example. In addition, Asia’s rice crisis is now going global. Thailand and Vietnam are just now stopping exports of rice in order to preserve ample supplies at home.

There has also been a huge increase in demand for meat, feed grains, and dairy products coming from the burgeoning Chinese and Indian middle and upper classes, as tastes have changed. For example, the growth in consumption of feed grains in China alone, has been much faster than its more well publicized growing demand for oil and metals.

The supposed crimes of biofuels are manifold. They’re being blamed for soaring global commodity prices, the destruction of the Amazon rain forest, increased greenhouse gases, food riots in Haiti, Indonesian deforestation, etc. Most of this, to

May-June, 2008

DISPELLING THE BIOFUEL MYTHS

Continued on page 24...

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borrow a farm expression, is ‘hogwash’.

food agricultural sources for processing in biofuels.

While it is true that much of the farm-to-fuel conversion, subsidized in the US and Europe makes no sense, biofuels remain very much part of the solution. It just depends on which biofuels!

It will likely take a combination of biofuel sources and production methods to replace a substantial percentage of fossil fuels. In addition, any serious conservation effort would also result in a significant reduction in demand.

Just wait until those hundreds of millions of Chinese and Indians, who are now eating more, start to drive cars within the next quarter century. What that will do to oil prices is anybody’s guess. However, what should be clear enough is that ethanol presents the only technically & economically viable alternative for large-scale substitution of petroleum fuels for transportation in the next decade or more.

Of course, the rapid re-development of electric cars with superior batteries would be another solution.

The quick answer to the question of where the most logical & available source is today; it is ethanol from Brazilian sugarcane. Brazil’s long-term national program of converting cane-for-ethanol has been very successful. Now, 80% of new cars can run on ethanol and all gasoline there comprises 25% biofuel. What sense does it make to have a surplus of environmentally-friendly Brazilian sugar-based ethanol, with a yield 8 times higher than US corn ethanol and zero impact on food prices, being kept from the American market by a tariff of 54 cents per gallon, while Iowan corn, much in demand for food, gets a subsidy to convert it to ethanol. Brazil is reported to have enough viable cane-growing Savannah area to multiply its 3.5 million hectares of canefor-ethanol production by ten times, without going near the Amazon ecosystem. As one Brazilian biofuel company CEO said: “It would make a lot more sense to drop the tariff, drop the subsidy, and allow Brazilian ethanol into the United States”. “This would also slash the pressure on US land use.” The real scam lies in the developed world’s protectionism, plus totally unnecessary subsidies, not the biofuel concept. OTHER POSSIBLE SOLUTIONS Mr. Coxe pointed out crop yields around the world need to increase dramatically. He gave the example of what has been achieved in the State of Illinois, where 7 times as much corn is produced per acre compared to the rest of the world. “That will be done with more fertilizer, with genetically modified seeds, and with advanced machinery and technology”. The US and European nations, should also be strong supporters of massive development efforts to commercialize the production of other sustainable non-food alternatives to fossil fuels on a global scale. One possible raw material could be all the waste materials, including used tires, now discarded. Another source could be by planting and harvesting of huge viable areas with some renewable non-

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THE FUTURE FOR INVESTORS Commodity stocks have risen in value over the last 5 years in direct response to surging demand. And, investing in commodities from stable countries has been a better, and safer, way to invest in the continuing China ‘boom’. In addition, some commodity stocks traditionally, have also been used as a hedge against inflation. Thus, because inflation is almost certainly on the rise, investors could take these commodity stocks to new heights as they seek havens from rising prices as well as from the declining purchasing power of the US dollar. As was pointed out in my previous Dollars & Sense article, ARE COMMODITIES BECOMING OVERVALUED?, most commodities prices are still nowhere close to 1970’s levels, once current prices have been adjusted for ‘real’ inflation. The key problem over the past year or two, is that rising US dollar-based commodity prices have largely tracked the declining value of the US dollar. Because of these issues, it is expected by several commodity Gurus, including Mr. Coxe, that commodity stocks will not trade in future just on earnings, but on substantially higher price-to earnings ratios as well. This has been dubbed a “double-barrelled commodity stock boom”. We believe this is a highly favourable situation for those of us who are commodity ‘bulls’. And, we expect that significant gains from investing in commodity stocks have only just begun. REFERENCES 1. FORGET OIL, THE NEW GLOBAL CRISIS IS FOOD, Donald Coxe, BMO Financial Group Global Strategist, The Financial Post, Toronto, January 7, 2008. 2. ASIAN APPETITES DRIVE UP COST OF BREAKFAST, Tom Miles, Reuters, March 7, 2008. 3. BRING ON THE RIGHT BIOFUELS, Roger Cohen, International Herald Tribune, April 23, 2008 For more information or reference details please contact Alan Weeks E-mail: imccr2002@yahoo.com Panama City Phone: (507) 209-3136

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May-June, 2008

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Exchange rate of the Costa Rican ¢ to the US Dollar October 516.71 November

502.25

December

500.97

January

499.74

February

499.00

March

497.67

Basic Interest Rate October 7.00 % November

7.00 %

December

7.00 %

January

7.25 %

February

5.50 %

March

5.25 %

Exchange rate of other currencies to the US Dollar Japanese Yen 99.460 Swiss Franc

0.9941

Canadian $

1.0268

Giro (DEG)

1.6445

ÂŁ Sterling

1.9873

Euro

1.5812

Mexican Peso

10.694

Korean Won

991.50

Danish Krone Norwegian Krone Argentine Peso

4.7156 5.0911 3.1653

Colombian Peso 1,833.7 Brasilian Real

1.7469

Libor Rate 1 month 2.7031 % 3 month

2.6881 %

6 month

2.6114 %

12 month

2.4863 %

Prime Rate

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5.25 %

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Holidays Of Costa Rica May 1st (& 2nd)- ARCR closed ‘Labour Day’ June 29th‘Saint Peter & Paul’ July 25th- ARCR closed ‘Guanacaste Day’ July 26th- ARCR closed ‘National Day’ ******************** A Touch of Wisdom “Persuasion is better than force.” Aesop (620-560 BC) “The pen is mightier than the sword.” unknown “Two men looked out through the same bars; one sees the mud and one the stars.” Frederick Langbridge (1849-1923) ******************** Quick Ones Teacher: Why are you late? Student: There was a man who lost a hundred dollar bill. Teacher: That’s nice. Were you helping him look for it? Student: No. I was standing on it. Customer: Excuse me, but I saw your thumb in my soup when you were carrying it. Waitress: Oh, that’s okay. The soup isn’t hot. The real estate agent says, “I have a good, cheap apartment for you.” The man replys, “By the week or by the month?” The agent answers, “By the garbage dump..”

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