Smrithi Nair, house

house

Smrithi Nair

it’s made of wood and stones and history all things a house dreams to be I guess it’s nice but it’s a little big for me

from a distance the house looks fragile dollhouse but we’re real people humans

my heart must know when lightning strikes because that’s the thing lightning’s not in the habit of striking the places of fake power in a made-up system it is all fake unnatural we are just playing house but when we played house, we were mothers and fathers and kids and sisters and brothers and aunts and uncles and friends and neighbors we were not dead bodies.

how do I appeal to your humanity when you are playing god and we are playing house

chechi tells me that our house has security guards don’t be scared they don’t let anything bad in but chechi how do guards keep the lightning out? the fake gods? how do guards keep being human? but chechi who protects the guards?

who protects you? when you walk home at night, down the hill, outside the forest to take the route that goes by the temple who do you pray to? who listens?

the house will outlast us all and i fear for the people within and without because i only have words the gods have more.

i am scared

we are not infallible when the earth gives way we will all go and that is comforting because we did everything wrong how can we be forgiven?

when the earth gives way we will all go but the earth will stay and when it gets new lives i hope they do better i hope they are not human and that is comforting

the gates tremble slightly tonight i wish the house the flowers the history the guards goodnight please be fine safe okay please be alive