THE EDGE VOL. 15 ISSUE 1 by The Edge Magazine

The Edge VOL. 15, ISSUE 1 ELON, NC

Matters of the Heart

THE ANATOMY OF A CRUSH | STRENGTH IN SILENCE | LITERARY LOVE OYSTERS: LET’S SHUCK | HOW DIAMONDS BECAME A GIRL’S BEST FRIEND

THE EDGE Editors-in-Chief Sarah Hennis and Catie Mannato Creative Directors Emma Mitchell and Cameron Leslie Copy Chief Emily Murrill Executive Stylist Julia Johnson Fashion Editor Hope Suire Assistant Editor Hannah Parker Writer Jenny Molyneaux Writer Caitlyn Bishop Writer Ava Girardi Writer Lilly Molina Writer Emma Petrosino Beauty & Wellness Editor Abigail Hayes Assistant Editor Riley Otis Writer Taylor Barbadora Writer Alexa Merheb Writer Sam Sutherland Writer Lyda Cosgrove Writer Emily Stabell Lifestyle Editor Alexandra Elliott Assistant Editor Taylor Scott Writer Isabel Steckman Writer Olivia Roederer Writer Alexandra Borda Writer Kailey Casl Writer Samantha Resnick Writer Parker Greason Travel Editor Avery Paulen Assistant Editor Delaney Moore Writer Emily Cohn Writer Elizabeth Wieboldt Writer Lexi Angermueller Writer Juliana Kuhno

Videography Director of Videography Kate Spencer Director of Videography Sophia Gaeta Assistant Video Editor Marian Laing Social Media Social Media Assistant Caitlin Dooher Social Media Assistant Sarah Serran Social Media Assistant Lucy Day Social Media Assistant Hailey Albers Graphic Designer Chrissy Yeager Graphic Designer Millie Whitmore Digital Media Analytics Director Robert White Analytics Assistant Lulu Lemken Analytics Assistant Lila Goldberg Analytics Assistant Caitlin Nay Design Design Assistant Serafina Paratore Designer Ella Bloomingdale Designer Sidney Rothkin Designer Sophie Lane Designer Brianna Ward Designer Avery Sleeper Designer Clara Truebner Photography Photo Assistant Reese Garrity Photographer Ana Luisa Scholtes Photographer Declan McGeady Photographer Carina Kaplan Photographer Julia Hardy

Features Editor Leslie Aviles Mendoza Writer Madi Rotermund Writer Shayla Smith Writer Caroline Bentley Writer Cailey Cetani Writer Michael Leung

Finance Finance Director Sophia Kotelly Finance Director Christina Alescio

Copy Assistant Copy Chief Zoe Richardson Assistant Copy Chief Caden Halberg

Styling Makeup Artist Sydney Perich Makeup Artist Minori Hata

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The Anatomy OF R S C H U A

Let’s talk about the biology of love, babe.

DELANEY MOORE | ASSISTANT TRAVEL EDITOR

ave you ever met someone and instantly thought, “Why are you so obsessed with me?” Like no, literally, why are you so obsessed with me? Or have you ever been completely and utterly enamored by someone? Have you felt that all-too-famous spark? Ever wondered why you blush, or want to understand why your heart sometimes feels like it’s about to burst? Well, there’s a reason for all that, and it’s not just in your head; it’s a full-body biological process. All these sensations are symptoms of falling in love… and falling in lust. These internal side effects are an experience we all have, and it’s so much more than just attraction. Let’s go through the cycle of crush connection, understand love resonance and unpack that buzzing sensation you feel in your heart. If you’re wondering why you react the way you do when you see your crush or what a spark really 6

is, we’ve got you covered, love. It’s time to talk about the science of love. “Omg, why am I blushing…”

LUST, ATTRACTION, ATTACHMENT Your cheeks flush, hands get clammy, pupils dilate, heart rate rises — oh no! You might just have a crush. There is a formula for love. Sometimes love can feel completely incomprehensible or totally baffling, but beneath the blush in your cheeks, there is a true series of complex chemical reactions taking place between the brain and the body. According to an article from the International Science Council, romantic love is broken down into three categories: lust, attraction and attachment. Each

category is identified by a set of in positive feelings, and hormones released from the vasopressin is linked with brain. The first stage, lust, physical and emotional releases testosterone and mobilization. estrogen. The second, attraction, The “honeymoon” phase is the release of dopamine, is the initial stage of the serotonin and norepinephrine. attraction cycle and is the time These three neurotransmitters when we feel that obsessive function similarly to endorphins fixation. This is due to an and make you feel all happy and increase in blood flow to the fuzzy. In the third stage of the brain’s pleasure center. cycle, attachment, the brain Sometimes, with fleeting re l e a s e s ox y t o c i n a n d crushes — when this blood vasopressin. Oxytocin is flow fades in the second responsible for the increase stage of attraction

PHOTO | DECLAN MCGEADY DESIGN | ELLA BLOOMINGDALE

— we no longer feel that spark anymore. However, if this crush is the real deal, the release of vasopressin and oxytocin creates a sense of security that remains in the body through long-lasting relationships. *Scientific information is from an article by the International Science Council.* Elle Woods puts it best: “Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people just don’t shoot their husbands. They just don’t.”

LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT Wait, I love you. Why do I love you? Falling in love is a whole chemical affair. It’s euphoric. It’s beautiful. Your brain goes totally haywire. According to an article from the Royal Institution, chemistry between a couple happens when you experience large releases of oxytocin and dopamine. While dopamine fires up the brain’s reward centers, resulting in that all-too-desirable euphoric state, oxytocin helps you trust someone new in a way you might not normally, facilitating the formation of a deep bond. Additionally, in the first few months of a relationship, the stress hormone — cortisol — floods your body, which is what causes that butterfly sensation and pupil dilation. But really, love at first sight is all in the eyes. The Royal Institution explains it best: “Eye contact is unbelievably important for so many social interactions — people can often have entire conversations through

minute facial expressions and intense eye contact.” “Hold on, why are you staring at me? I feel like you’re staring at me. Oh, what pretty eyes you have.” Prolonged eye contact can cause attraction. According to an article from CooperVision, “Eye contact is a powerful stimulator of affection. A study published in the Journal of Research and Personality in which two opposite sex strangers were asked to gaze into each other’s eyes for two minutes found that this was enough in some cases to produce passionate feelings for each other.” “Let’s just gaze at each other and fall in love, okay?” *Scientific information is from articles from the Royal Institution and CooperVision.*

IT’S JUST THE PHEROMONES “OMG, you made me blush. I am so drawn to you.” Maybe… it’s just the pheromones? Pheromones, according to Healthline, “are chemical substances that are secreted outside of the body in fluids like urine and sweat. They are basically a hidden form of communication.” So spicy. Our pheromones are unique, like snowflakes, no two individuals have the same. “They send signals from one individual to another and this triggers a response in the individual receiving those signals, such as a hormonal change or specific behavior.” Pheromones are

used to attract. Can you believe our natural body odor can play a role in how attractive we are to someone? Different companies are now pro ducing ne w pheromone perfumes that are meant to highlight one’s own natural scent and inspire sexual attraction in the people who smell you. One of the most popular pheromone perfumes on the market is from the beauty brand Glossier called Glossier You. Marketed as the ultimate personal fragrance, Glossier’s hot perfume is formulated to be “a personal skin-scent enhancer — primarily made up of base notes to let more of you shine through, meaning it smells a little differently on everyone.”

INSTANT SOUL RESONANCe A moment of fate. Heartstruck conne c t ion. Awe. Recognition. Coming home. When you resonate with someone else, it feels like familiarity; it feels

understandable to you. Sometimes attraction can be spiritual. Something in you recognizes something in someone else — nostalgia. Resonating is being in agreement with someone. This side of love is best left unexplained. Instant soul resonance is the spiritual side of love at first sight. It is when your vibration is meeting someone else’s. According to Spirit Vine, the concept of spiritual vibrations is based on the idea that all matter in the universe is made up of energy that vibrates. We’re all just energy, vibrating at different frequencies. So when you do meet that special someone, pay attention to the physical symptoms but also what your heart is telling you. Sometimes those butterflies are more than just hormones; they are sentimentality and a shared reminiscence. Check in with your heart chakra, our center of love for oneself and others. Meditate. Exercise so those endorphins flow. Feed your heart by feeding your soul. Let yourself succumb to love — your body is practically doing it for you.

strength

silence

ALEXANDRA ELLIOT | LIFESTYLE EDITOR

ow do you go from talking to someone every day to not at all? When a person becomes a part of your daily routine, habits and thoughts, they become a part of who you are. This ultimately begs the question of what you should do when they can no longer play the role they once did in your life. Whether it’s a romantic or platonic relationship, any time a connection ends, it brings feelings of sadness, grief, anger and nostalgia. As you cope with these feelings and the loss of someone you once loved, the “No Contact Rule” seems to be the absolute last thing you should be doing. So why does everyone recommend it? The “No Contact Rule” is defined as eliminating all 10

communication, such as calling, texting and social media messaging, with your ex-partner. Both relationship experts and psychologists recommend this method as the primary way to mend your heart and move on from a failed relationship. It’s daunting. Although intimidating, it gives you the time and space away from the relationship that you require to properly grieve. In books like “Why We Love” by Helen Fisher and TED talks like “How To Fix a Broken Heart” anthropologists and psychologists deep dive into the concept of love as an addiction, exploring the chemical reactions and anatomy behind the intense emotion and relating it to drug addiction. On the other side of pleasure — as those who cope with drug addictions know — is pain,

you must make the choice for yourself that it is over and let go. which is where the symptoms of withdrawal come in. During a breakup, when you go from a loving relationship to cold isolation, your brain loses its comfort just as it does when people stop taking drugs. Various brain studies have demonstrated the similarity in brain activation between those who are going through heartbreak and those who are experiencing withdrawal from substances like cocaine or opioids; the chemical reactions are exactly the same. Going No Contact is like going cold turkey. You are detoxing as you deprive yourself of something that your body craves, but sometimes your body doesn’t know what’s best for you. When you’re heartbroken, your mind doesn’t know what’s best either, which can be difficult to

accept. In an attempt to mitigate the pain, you will begin to take trips down memory lane, idealizing the past and replaying the best moments with the person you are trying to heal from. As humans, we inherently look for a reason for everything, and you will want to reach out in an attempt to give yourself “closure.” Unfortunately, closure isn’t real. Reaching out will just continuously reopen a wound you are trying to heal. You must make the choice for yourself that it is over and let go. You can do hard things, and this is one hard thing that will lead to a happier, healthier and more fulfilled you. If you’ve experienced going through No Contact before, you know how painful the process is. However, you also know that nothing lasts forever, and this pain is 11

temporary. Rather than prolonging it by trying to force a version of a relationship you once had into your post-breakup life, you are releasing it. This takes more strength than you might recognize, as you have to overcome everything your body and mind are telling you. The first days are the hardest, but as time goes on, you will find yourself feeling grateful when you can reflect on the relationship without the blindness that inevitably accompanies love. Instead of idealizing the other person and the way your life was when you were with them, you will come to appreciate the present and the opportunity for a new life path. According to the American Psychological Association, journaling has been proven to be therapeutic to maintain No Contact. Many psychologists also recommend making a list of reasons why that relationship and that person wasn’t right for you, which will serve as a reminder to look back at when you feel like falling back in. This list can give you the power to fight the temptation to slide back to the comfort of what was and learn to embrace an unknown future that holds everything you deserve. The people who deserve to be a part of your life will never make you question your worth or threaten your well-being. By cutting ties with the people who put themselves in a position to lose you, you are opening yourself up to the people who are meant for you. It’s better to embrace the temporary solitude and rely on your current support system than to seek deceiving relief by reaching out to your ex-partner or friend. Over time, you will evolve into a person that no longer relates to the one who struggled with No Contact. You will slowly but surely begin to fill the void that you thought would never go a w a y. Reestablishing your identity without a person you once relied on seems impossible, but it will happen — maybe without you even realizing it. You will make new friends, 12

DESIGN | SERAFINA PARATORE

y l e r u s t u b y l w o l s l l i w you id o v e h t l l fi begin to t h g u o h t u o y that . y a w a o g would never

create new experiences and discover new hobbies. You will try new foods and go to new places you may have never dreamed of going. Your life will be your own, and you will be okay. This is your life. As much as people hate to hear it, if someone is meant to be in it, they will be. By maintaining No Contact, you are rebuilding your own identity, shedding the version of yourself you once were and growing into a more evolved person. The most uncomfortable path is often the most rewarding. While it may feel uncomfortable in the beginning, your future self will thank you for your dedication to a better future — one without an emotional tie to the people who have left or hurt you. Although difficult, No Contact initiates the path of building yourself back up again and reclaiming your power. There is a you on the other side of No Contact, and that you wouldn’t exist without taking the first tiny, slightly painful, but amazingly rewarding step. 13

Situationship o AVERY PAULEN | TRAVEL EDITOR

or relationship? Tips and tricks for getting what you want and deserve out of relationships.

ollege is a time for exploration. We date around trying to discover what we want out of a person. But when it actually comes down to getting serious, a few things can go wrong. It can be disappointing when your “fling” has commitment issues, is emotionally unavailable or is not feeling ready to settle down. Even though we usually see it coming, it might end in heartbreak, despite never being “official” in the first place. Let’s start off by defining a “situationship,” which is essentially a relationship without the label. Being in a situationship can be extremely confusing and sometimes difficult to navigate. While it can be fun to fool around, the more you do, the more you become attached. That’s why it’s so important to establish clear boundaries and communicate what you’re looking for right off the bat. The goal of “The Shift” by social media sensation Christina Najjar (aka @Tinx) is to help you navigate your feelings, control your dating outcome, get what you want and, more importantly, what you deserve out of a future connection. “The Shift” is all about changing your perspective on dating from “Am I good enough for them?” to “Do they fulfill my needs?” and “Are they good enough for me?” In this day and age, we heavily rely on others’ opinions of us and we often forget to put ourselves first. Social media and dating apps only exacerbate this, as we tend to compare ourselves to others and seek validation through likes and comments. And no, we are not saying get off the dating apps. If that’s what makes you happy, go for it — but set your expectations early. Some people on Tinder, Bumble and Hinge may only be looking for a hookup and nothing more. The sooner you realize this, the less likely you’ll get hurt. 15

DESIGN | AVERY SLEEPER PHOTO | CARINA KAPLAN

The Talking Stage

The “Situationship” Phase

In her book, Tinx refers to the “Box Theory” to describe navigating expectations in the talking stage. In short, the “Box Theory” is exactly how it sounds; before even moving forward with a relationship, people tend to put people in a “box” while dating. There are three different boxes: the person wants to date you, they want to hook up with you or they want nothing to do with you. All it comes down to is the first impression they gather from your dating app profile. From that point, expectations are set before the conversation even begins. According to Tinx, once a person gets this idea of what they want, there is no changing their mind. If they just want to hook up with you, you can’t convince them to get into a relationship down the line. And we’re not saying this applies to everyone. It is completely possible for that “I can change them” mentality to actually work, and it has. But sniffing out the signals before you’re in too deep is definitely important to practice in your dating life. Helpful Tip: We are allowed to have different views on romantic relationships. Embrace your choices, and don’t let anyone make you question otherwise. Just live your best life and do YOU!

Great things happen when you least expect them. We hear this phrase so often, and it holds both positive and negative connotations. Dating can often be a pleasant surprise and you can find the love of your life when you least expect it. But sometimes, this phrase can actually be discouraging because it forces us to give up on finding love (or whatever you’re looking for). This doesn’t mean you should aggressively go out and announce to the world that you want a boyfriend or girlfriend or try to force things on every single person you meet. What it does mean is that you need to readjust your expectations and decide what you want – you might not have your meet-cute with your future partner from making eye contact across a crowded bar. Once you actually meet someone you like, you might enter into the “situationship” phase. You might begin to picture what your future would look like with them. You might find yourself starting to become slightly obsessed. This obsession does not translate to a relationship, although you might mistake it for one. There’s constant love-bombing, a tactic in which someone bombards you with extreme displays of attention and affection with the intent to manipulate you. In a situationship, you practically do everything that couples do minus the label; you go on dates, have sleepovers, cuddle and maybe even take cute photos together. But the expectation in one partner’s mind is that it will never turn into anything more… When the harsh reality starts to set in, you might start to have feelings of regret, wishing you never gave yourself to that person in the first place. The key is to not get discouraged. We are all human, and we make mistakes. Instead of letting your past decisions consume you, treat the situationship as a learning experience and something that helped you grow. Looking back, you can say you discovered what you want and don’t want out of a future relationship. You now know how to spot a toxic situation and will be able to dodge it when a similar opportunity presents itself in the future. And above all else, even though there was pain and a plethora of other emotions, you came out of it being a much stronger person. 17

And above all else, even though there was pain and a plethora of other emotions, you learned that you were capable of feeling love and care for someone else – and that’s a beautiful thing. Dating Around

At the end of the day, Tinx says that dating should be about self-discovery and not just a means to an end. She states, “Making small but mighty shifts in thinking can be a tool for personal growth that fuels you instead of fatigues you. The point is not to get to the end unscathed. The point is to know yourself, discover what fulfills you and have fun along the way.”

As you embark on your next dating adventure, start to shift your perspective when looking for a potential partner. Always remember that your feelings come first and foremost, and the rest is up to your partner to take care of YOU. At the end of the day, you are worthy of love and deserve to feel deserved.

Why “I don t” is the new “I do” CAILEY CETANI

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UNVEILING THE GEN Z LOVE REVOLUTION 20

rowing up, we can recall the days as children when games at home or school were centered around the concept of marriage. Whether the game was called “Marriage,” “Husband/Wife” or “I Do,” the main premise was this: walking down the imaginary aisle, getting married, and having the perfect family with two kids, two parents and a dog. However, as time went on, there was a shift. More kids saw the idealistic image of marriage slowly dissolve away into a more pragmatic and realistic point of view. They were front row to their parents fighting and other friends’ parents separating. The rose-colored glasses were slowly pulled away, and more clear glasses were put in their place to reveal that marriage is not always a fairy tale. Marriage is something that requires hard work and dedication, not just a silly game we played as children. Generation Z grew up in a time where it seemed like it was common for half of your friend group to have divorced parents, while the other half had parents that were always on the precipice of it. Some parents opted for separation or compromising to stay together for the kids, believing it was in the children’s best interest. These experiences created a lasting mark on some, causing them to ask the question to themselves: Do I want to get married? Do I want to go down the same road as my parents? Perhaps the reason for the rise in opting out of marriage is due to the rise in feminism and women’s increasing access to education and development. Maybe it’s dating apps and the changing societal norms on who makes the first move and relationship expectations. The result? A growing number of members of Generation Z are questioning the

necessity of marriage altogether. Take Elon University junior Andrew Ferris for example. He is steadfast against marriage, citing his desire for a more individualistic lifestyle that doesn’t align with the responsibility of a committed partnership. “I realized that having a family takes a ton of responsibility,” Ferris said. “And if I plan to have a job where I can be traveling frequently, you know, having a family would just be an extra responsibility that I’d really have to think of.” Statistics reflect this shifting idea of the responsibilities of a relationship. A 2019 study by the Pew Research Center recorded that the amount of people getting married has decreased by 58% since 1995, while the amount of unmarried couples living together increased from 3% to 7%. Conversations with peers revealed that Ferris is not alone in his views. Many find that relationships are overwhelming. Some cited their concerns about parenting, career aspirations and the sheer mental load that committed life can present. “It would be too much of a hassle,” Ferris said. “They don’t feel like being a parent or they want to have a job where they could just be them. They feel like having a family would be too much on their mind.” However, the reasons for being against marriage are as diverse as the individuals themselves. In a study conducted by the Thriving Center of Psychology, around 73% of people surveyed believed marriage is too expensive. Even more so, 85% of participants believe that it is not necessary to get married to solidify one’s relationship. What’s more, the digital age has reshaped the landscape of modern romance. Nowadays when getting on a dating app, users are confronted with 21

clichés such as a man holding a fish, confusing group photos, where it is like “Where’s Waldo” to find the actual person you are talking to, or just photos that seem too artificial to be real of the user you are swiping on. Although some have found their perfect person on the dating app, some people have had some difficulty. On one side of the argument is that people think the whole premise of online dating is hiding behind the screen and being whoever you’ve always wanted to be. With that type of thought process, this has led to a larger amount of dissatisfaction with many losing their trust on who they are actually talking to. On the other hand, it allows for people who are introverted to have more of a chance of finding their person without the pressure of being out socially all the time. With modern dating, people have distanced themselves from what has been seen in the past as the “traditional” way of dating. The evolution has led to a shift in gender roles and relationship expectations. More women are prioritizing education and self-development before entering into relationships, leading to a more selective approach to dating. This results in women being more decisive when choosing the right man to date. More men are being vocal about not wanting to make the first move or satisfy the expectation of always paying. These have all been commonly found in modern dating. While self-improvement and boundary-setting are admirable, it also means that people are becoming more selective with their partners and having larger gaps of time between when they get into relationships. These factors, along with many others, have contributed to what the modern dating scene is today and the transformation of our expectations and attitudes toward marriage. As Generation Z grapples with the complex web of choices and influence, one thing is certain: the institution of marriage is undergoing a profound evolution, and no one knows what exactly the end product will be.

Marriage is something that requires hard work and dedication.

PHOTO | ANA LUISA SCHOLTES

tickled TICKLED pink & PINK seeing SEEING red RED

LILLY MOLINA 24

hen the color red comes into mind, love trails with it. Whether it’s roses given to someone on Valentine’s Day or the swirl of a candy cane during the holiday season, red is always around — even in fashion. According to a Forbes article, “In color psychology, red elicits the greatest feelings of any color.” Out of all the colors, red gives off vibes of intensity, as it exuberates feelings of power, confidence, anger, sexiness and love. Let’s first break down the cultural significance of the color red. It is well known in the United States that red is associated with love and emotions. In China, red symbolizes luck and happiness, hence why brides will traditionally wear a red gown on their wedding day. In South Africa, red is associated with mourning. The red in their flag signifies bloodshed and sacrifice during the fight for independence. Needless to say, the color holds deep meaning to various cultures all over the world. Now looking into the world of fashion, people wear red to make a statement — and that’s just what many fashion houses have done in recent collections. In Valentino’s Fall/Winter 2023 collection, many red garments were sent down the stairs of the Piazza di Spagna in Rome. The most notable gown was made of giant red roses as it wrapped around the model. The collection was so impressive that the Editor-In-Chief of Vogue, Anna Wintour, gave her fifth standing ovation for the show in her 35-year career. Since that show, red has only continued to dominate the season. Monochromatic red looks are also hitting the runway hot this season. According to InStyle magazine, “The Fall/Winter 2023 runways were alive with red in dozens of variations… [with shows such as] Stella McCartney, Elie Saab, Ferragamo, Blumarine and Bottega Veneta.” Since the Fall/Winter 2023 fashion season, red has continued to be a staple down the runway, and it does not seem to be going away. Kendall Jenner just closed Scaperelli’s Spring/Summer 2024 show in a

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show-stopping, head-to-toe red dress. From afar, it might have looked like a simple strapless red dress, but it was actually made entirely out of faux fingernails. Schiaparelli truly let the red dress speak for itself, choosing to pair it with just nude pumps, no jewelry and minimal makeup. The sexy red dress has always been a timeless staple in the fashion world, with icons like Jessica Rabbit showcased in a scandalous strapless red gown. In “Pretty Woman,” Julia Roberts turned heads in her iconic red dress that her character, Vivian Ward, wears. Another example even includes Lady Gaga’s famous red meat dress that she appeared in at the 2010 MTV Video Music Awards. The color red just oozes with the persona of sex and scandal in American pop culture, but now it is making a true statement. People wear red for confidence and to make an outfit pop. Whether it’s through a monochromatic look or a bold lip, the color red shines through in all shades to cater to an endless array of looks and styles. While red’s success in the fashion industry has reached an all-time high, a new color has entered the arena. Step aside red, pink is here — red’s newest competitor. Refinery29 recently named pink the color of the year. With the movie release of “Barbie” over the summer, pink has only soared in popularity. In certain cultures, pink has always held special significance. For example, in Japan, the color pink is gender-neutral. In Japan, pink stems from samurai culture, with the color representing the death and mourning of a fallen soldier. Therefore, pink was considered a masculine color, but over time with genderless fashion taking hold in Japan, it became a gender-neutral color beloved by all. In the United States, however, the color pink has a history of being extremely gendered and associated with femininity. But there has been a push for the color pink to be accepted among all genders. “On Wednesdays, we wear pink” is no longer just for the girls. According to an article from TIME

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PHOTO | JULIA HARDY DESIGN | SERAFINA PARATORE

Magazine, “As pink has become more popular, it’s figured more prominently in men’s fashion, as have other symbols of femininity.” More male celebrities such as Harry Styles have been seen rocking the color pink and pushing the envelope on gendered fashion. Lionel Messi can be seen wearing a pink jersey for his new soccer team, Inter Miami. Pink truly has shaped into a versatile color, joining the ranks with red in dominating societal trends and culture. Not only is pink continuing to rebrand itself as a gender-neutral color, but it has taken the fashion industry by storm over the last year. In the fall of 2022,

Valentino did an all-pink, ready-to-wear collection for the spring of this year. They predicted that pink was going to be this past spring/summer’s major color — and Valentino could not have been more spot on. Pink practically invaded closets with “Barbie” resurrecting the color, giving it a sense of empowerment and confidence. Red and pink have helped anyone and everyone express themselves in the fashion world. These colors serve as symbols of cultural identity and meaning throughout the world. Both will never fade out of fashion or societal trends. Whether it’s red or pink, both colors will always remain timeless down the runway. 29

LOVE LETTERS WE NEVER SENT XOXO, the edge staff

LOVE

ACROSS BORDERS LESLIE AVILES MENDOZA | FEATURES EDITOR

ove is a fundamental human emotion that transcends language and culture but is expressed differently depending on where you come from. Love is a universal phenomenon that surpasses languages, barriers and various cultures and is communicated differently throughout the world. Although it’s a universal feeling, the way it is expressed can be different for everyone, especially those with different cultures. There are five main types of love languages, which include physical touch, words of affirmation, quality time, gift-giving and acts of service. Some of these are demonstrated more than others in specific countries. A country’s culture can influence the way that love is expressed. Different cultures have a large effect on how love is perceived and expressed.

Let’s start with what most of us are already familiar with: the U.S. In America, the way that love is expressed is through a combination of verbal affirmations and physical touch. Although there are preferences when demonstrating love, these are the most popular ones. These two go hand in hand. Love is also depicted in film, art, music and pop culture in general. In movies such as “The Notebook,” “La La Land” and “West Side Story,” love and romance are the main themes. American pop culture emphasizes love. Take albums, for example, Olivia Rodrigo’s “SOUR” or Adele’s “30.” These two focus on love and expressing themselves through their music as they go through heartbreak. When it comes to the demonstration of love, Mexico is much more expressive than America.

Physical touch is a key love language. People greet each other with hugs and kisses, even if it’s their first time meeting each other. Love is also demonstrated through food, dance and sharing of their culture. These allow for connections and bonds to form and grow. Mexicans don’t have any issues with being open about how they express their emotions towards others. Similarly, Brazilians are known for their warm and expressive nature of love. Love is mainly expressed through physical touch, such as through hugging and kissing. It is not rare to see public displays of affection. Brazil is known for its colorful and lively culture. Just like in Mexican culture,

Love is universal phenomenon that surpasses languages, barriers and various cultures.

Brazilians don’t have any issues expressing themselves openly either. In saying that, it is pretty normal for Latino culture to be expressive. In Japan, love is expressed through simple yet meaningful gestures. Japanese culture is less accepting of public displays of affection. Physical touch is not a big part of the way Japanese people express their love for one another. Unlike the previous countries mentioned, hugging and kissing are not a common part of their greeting culture. Instead, thoughtful gifts and gestures are the way that love is expressed. A few common characteristics of the expression of love in Japan are subtleness, respect and consideration. Even though there might not be a lot of physical displays of affection, thoughtfulness is just as meaningful. It demonstrates to your loved ones that you are listen-

DESIGN | EMMA MITCHELL 34

ing to them and that you are thinking of them constantly. It’s the little things that keep relationships stable. In South Korea, there are specific holidays dedicated to the celebration of love, such as Pepero Day and White Day. Both Pepero Day and White Day are big days for couples in South Korea. During these holidays, couples exchange gifts and express their love for each other. Pepero Day and White Day are similar to Valentine’s Day. Similar to Japan, public displays of affection are frowned upon, so couples demonstrate their love for each other by wearing matching outfits, doing activities together and getting matching rings. Common characteristics of the expression of love in South Korea include respect, tradition, loyalty and the importance of family.

Getting the approval of family members is seen as an significant part of a relationship, as it reflects the importance of family values. Of course, we have to talk about France if we’re going to talk about love! The famous “City of Love” is Paris, France after all. French culture emphasizes verbal and physical expressions of love. The French greet each other by giving two kisses on the cheeks. Love in France is expressed through art, music and literature. The French are said to be romantic and seductive when it comes to expressing their love for others. The language itself is considered to be the language of love. It is important to note that love is a broad term, and it is demonstrated in various ways. Not everyone

in these countries will show love in the same ways. Age, gender and the nature of relationships have a large influence on the way people express their love in their respective countries. As we can see, culture plays a significant role in how love is expressed. Some forms of love may be more socially acceptable in one country compared to another. Regardless of our own cultures and practices, it is important to understand how expressions of love differ and why understanding other cultures goes hand in hand. From verbal and physical expressions to small and simple gestures, love is demonstrated worldwide in various ways. The different ways we receive and express love are important. At the end of the day, love is love, no matter how it is expressed.

: OYSTERS Let’s Shuck! Wines and oysters and pears… oh my!

JULIA JOHNSON | EXECUTIVE STYLIST

ood isn’t just something we need to survive, but term stems from the goddess of love, Aphrodite, of something we can use to thrive. In many cultures, course. In Greek mythology, Aphrodite is revered for food is considered a love language of its own. It planting the first pomegranate. Whether it be its rich is a form of expression, a passion, an art form. All over lore or its likeness to a heart, the pomegranate is still the world, different ingredients and recipes tell a story considered a romantic symbol in literature. This juicy, that words cannot. They come from generations of rich fuchsia fruit boosts testosterone in everyone, not just history, encapsulating a deep love and celebration of one men, by lowering levels of the stress chemical cortisol. another. From romantic dinners to meticulously packed Figs share a similar connotation, as the arrival of fig school lunches, there is no doubt a good meal makes crops often elicited a late summer copulatory ritual in us feel all warm inside. But sometimes, it does more ancient Greek society. Maybe there was something else than that. at play here. But the impact of food on hormones cannot Take aphrodisiacs, for example. What are they? be ignored. Legend has it that in the 18th century, Italian Merriam-Webster defines them as “an agent (such adventurer Cassanova slurped down copious amounts as a food or drug) that arouses or is held to arouse of oysters before entangling with his lovers. Sure, they sexual desire.” The are rich in zinc, which is a necessary nutrient

DESIGN | BRIANNA WARD PHOTO | CAMERON LESLIE 37

involved in the male sex drive and fertility. It’s also said to increase dopamine, boost mood and… other things. things. Still, oysters have yet to be studied at length to determine a solid connection. There are three main categories of aphrodisiacs’ effects: they are thought to increase potency, boost libido and increase pleasure. Whether it is biological or metaphysical, there has to be some reason why these foods have been sexually linked throughout history. When you think of a date, is your first thought the encounter or the fruit? They both make us feel some type of way. But before we go any further, let’s get one thing straight. There is no scientific evidence that directly links foods to sex organ stimulation. Rather, aphrodisiac foods creep into the body and mind through the stimulation of other bodily functions that we can confuse with being turned on. Asparagus is argued to be an aphrodisiac, but its bodily connotations are anything but sexy. Yet this slender, green vegetable works with the kidneys to purify the urinary tract — so maybe this unsung hero needs some positive recognition. Some even argue the effects of these alleged aphrodisiac foods are a complete placebo, a sham, an excuse. After all, most food serves some kind of nutritional purpose, so we need to metabolize it to go on living. But then again, another essential aspect of life is its generational continuation through reproduction. So is the purpose of these foods to stimulate, or is that just a bonus? Perhaps there are multiple means to the same end. But aren’t you just a little curious to see if there is some truth to all of the hype? In all reality, the act of eating the food itself can be inherently suggestive. Think about how your mouth puckers when you eat something sour. While bananas are usually the first flirty fruit to come to mind, according to an article by Nutrition Coach, some cultures consider pears to be a “botanical celebration of the female form.” You are what you eat, right? Maybe it’s the way aphrodisiacs dance on your tongue that leaves you wanting more. Take hot peppers, for example. They make the taste buds come alive, sending a fiery shock down the throats of those brave enough to take a bite. Maybe we want to prove to ourselves that we can take the heat. We want that adrenaline, that risk-taking rush that comes from pushing the limits of your tolerance. Spicy foods can cleanse the mind, body and spirit. Not only that, but hot climates prefer

spicy foods to get rid of pathogens and increase longevity, both in life and in the bedroom. What more literal way is there to spice up your love life? But, be careful walking the line between pain and pleasure. Oftentimes, these foods work to stimulate blood flow, leading to increased arousal. Dark chocolate, for example, is known to be good for the heart. The New York Times reported on a study of chocolate causing rises in serotonin and a falling-in-love stimulant called phenylethylamine. Try saying that three times fast. When it comes to chocolate, who can resist its luxe, sleek packaging of high-end confections? Or even the grocery store stash of chocolate chips that quickly dwindles in your cupboard? When dipping a strawberry in chocolate, the aphrodisiac combo packs double the romantic punch. Aphrodisiacs themselves are like a box of chocolates; you never know what you’re going to get. Speaking of chocolate, this guilty pleasure isn’t the only thing spiking in sales around Valentine’s Day. We’ve gone this long without stating the obvious, the evident lovelinked beverage: wine. After all, there is truly nothing better than the bubbly, giggly feeling you get from a good wine night. Sorry guys, but red wine is for the girls… that is, it is specifically linked to the sex drive of women. May they be delightful or deceitful, there is no doubt aphrodisiac foods have the power to heighten our mood mood.. So how can we put all of these things together? To start out, go to town on a charcuterie board. Add in some nuts, fig spread and drizzle some honey over a hunk of goat cheese. It’s mouth-watering just thinking about it. For a fresh-tasting side, dice up some spicy, lemony asparagus. Or maybe grill up some watermelon and add some fresh herbs. Feeling thirsty? Throw together a fruity sangria, filled with apples, pears, pomegranates, maybe even pineapple and mango if you’re feeling tropical. To finish it off, whip up a dessert with peanut butter, chocolate and banana. In the morning, take your pick of coffee or tea — they both do the trick. There are entire cookbooks dedicated to using ingredients that help stabilize the menstrual cycle and boost fertility. With enough enthusiasm and a quick Google search, the possibilities are endless. At the end of the day, food is fuel, and it can be used to better yourself and empower you. So use it to your advantage, and who knows what will become of it.

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r o F H

ave you ever been through a breakup? Love is a trend that never goes out of style. Relationships bring us our sweetest highs and our bitterest lows. Everyone copes differently through a breakup, but it’s your choice whether it tears you down or builds you up. The lyrics, “Lately I’ve been dressing for revenge,” from world-renowned popstar Taylor Swift, describe self-love and strength — a philosophy found after you go through hardship to find resilience within treating yourself right. Dressing for revenge can take a different meaning depending on the person, but at the core, it’s a way to discover your independence through personal style. While Swift fans relate to her music they also relate to her attitude regarding fashion. Swift’s revenge anthem entitled “Vigilante Shit,” off of her tenth studio album “Midnights” captivates audiences as she sings about being a strong woman and embracing her independence. After a breakup, both women and men gravitate to some sort of change. Some pick up new hobbies, others get a haircut. The most effective change? Changing your style. Tapping into your inner style with a bit of rebranding is the move you need to take an optimistic

JENNY MOLYNEAUX step forward. Revenge dressing is truly for everyone. It is your main character moment to get up and shout that you deserve better. Nothing is quite as loud as the silent satisfaction of knowing you feel and look better than ever. An outfit showcasing your revenge sends a powerful message. It’s time to revamp your wardrobe and mindset. Be confident, be positive and dress for revenge. Dressing for revenge is as much of a mentality as it is a style. It’s all about taking back the power and loving yourself. After getting out of a relationship, loving yourself is the most powerful thing you can do. Using fashion as a tool can help bring out the best version of yourself. Begin your love affair between mindset and fashion. It’s time to kiss your old style goodbye and embrace your new era. A great way to kick-start this era is by rebuilding your confidence and nurturing personal growth by switching up your wardrobe. This is your moment to flip the switch and come out of the situation looking and feeling your best. The ease of putting on comfortable clothes daily can overshadow the inspiration of dressing up. Wearing the same sweatshirt and your favorite jeans can prove monotonous as part of a weekly outfit rotation; 41

experiment with different aesthetic choices and outfits to add flair and self-expression to your wardrobe. Have you ever been told that if you look good, you’ll feel good? Have you experienced a shopping trip where you found clothing with the perfect shade to compliment your complexion? Or have you ever found a dress that flatters your figure so well? Dressing up is a great way to enhance your happiness and confidence. Fashion is a superpower in itself, as it has the ability to make you feel better on hard days. Consider the feeling of when you put on a new outfit and you feel like you’re on top of the world. Notable designer Yves Saint Laurent expresses, “Good clothing is a passport for happiness.” Fashion can truly elevate your mood and self-assurance. As you’re deciding on your aesthetic for this new stage in your life, it’s important to learn how to curate trendy looks. It’s always fun to find inspiration from people and your surroundings. After all, style is a form of art. Whether it’s Margot Robbie’s gorgeous couture on her “Barbie” press tour or Harry Styles’ sequined jumpsuit from “Love on Tour,” fashion inspiration is all around. To add this flair to your style, you need to know where to begin. The best way to start piecing together your new looks is by investing in staple pieces, timeless fashion, and bold colors. Staple pieces are integral in versatile fashion and can be used as a base for creating a fuller look; your white blouse, black stilettos and trendy beige trench coat are all examples. If you take that same white blouse and pair it with dress pants or a pleated skirt, then you’ll have two entirely different looks spawned from the same simple pieces. The magic of these

pieces is truly exemplified when they all come together in harmony with your unique style. These staple items serve as the foundation for a multitude of stylish outfits. Staples not only saves you time and effort but also provides a reliable foundation for expressing your unique style and boosting your confidence in every outfit you put together.

Timeless pieces, clothing and accessories that continue to be in style and do not follow the structure of typical trends, are crucial for revenge dressing. Timeless pieces, such as the black dress, are easy to add to your closet and can help boost your confidence when putting outfits together. The black dress, better known as the “revenge dress,” was coined by the British Press after Princess Diana wore her iconic black mini dress to the Serpentine Gallery the same night that Prince Charles confessed his adultery. Princess Diana is the perfect example of dressing for revenge. The black dress takes on various forms throughout the years but remains true to its original concept of being a gorgeous piece that continues to hold up as a chic must-have. Using the black dress as a staple, you can truly put your own spin on timeless pieces and celebrate your beautiful fashion choices. Bold colors are a perfect way to stand out in a crowd. Colors like red, green, magenta, indigo, blue and yellow are all eye-catching. Pairing these bold, stand-out colors with a more simple base, such as bright pink tights under a black mini dress, is an effective strategy. These hues contrast the typically neutral tones of staple and timeless pieces. Bold colors are often featured on runways and fashion week shows across the world; designers utilize them as a way to make the garments stand out. A great example of practicing revenge dressing with bold colors is Ariana Madix’s iconic, bright red two-piece that she wore to the Vanderpump Rules season 10 reunion, which took place shortly after her long-term boyfriend was revealed to be cheating. Not only does the fashion industry generally appreciate bold colors, but they are an easy, quick way to spice things up and stand out among others. When practicing the art of dressing for revenge, we can take inspiration from many fashion icons, such as Princess Diana, Ariana Madix and Taylor Swift. Swift is the queen of beginning a new era, as her albums demonstrate various times of her life. Swift closes “Vigilante Shit” with, “Don’t get sad, get even, so on the weekends, I don’t dress for friends, lately I’ve been dressing for revenge.” She describes the freedom of not dressing for anyone but yourself, so take this opportunity to put yourself first by dressing for revenge. In your new era, say yes to experimenting with new styles. Splurge on that gorgeous piece of clothing that you’ve always wanted, and use fashion as an outlet for self-expression! Step out of your comfort zone and explore pulling off new looks. Show off your independence and use life as your personal stage to dress for revenge. 44

LITERARY LOVE B Y A BIGAIL H AYES BEAUTY & WELLNESS EDITOR

01.

CHAPTER 1

hy do you read books? Some might say they pick up a book because they enjoy fantasizing about another world, while others want to stay informed on certain topics. One of our favorite things to do is indulge ourselves in romance books, but not just any type of romance books. Realistic, self-help, relationship-styled books are our go-to. Just like a book, every relationship goes through chapters. Whether it’s experiencing the butterflies during the first part of a relationship or feeling like you’re not good enough for your partner, there is a book for every chapter in a relationship. Having a crush isn’t for the weak. From pampering up your appearance to hopefully catching their attention to experiencing that giddy feeling from just thinking about them, a crush can turn your life upside down — but in a good way. But what do we actually know about our crush? While having a crush, we like to fantasize about that person and envision ideas on who we think our crush is, or who we want them to be. Movies and television shows depict young adolescents as the

ones with crushes, but anyone can experience having a crush on someone. Sometimes, we may feel like idiots while having a crush. The book “The Idiot” by Elif Batuman follows Selin, a daughter of Turkish immigrants, who develops an intense crush on an older mathematics student during her freshman year at Harvard University. “The Idiot” depicts what it feels like to have a crush on someone who may or may not like you back. Whether it’s you or the person you’re interested in, someone has to make the first move. This can feel exhilarating because the date you’ve dreamed of happening is about to occur. This can also be nerve-wracking. What if your high expectations of your crush just go down the drain? From a young age, women have been taught to wait for men to make the first move. What’s up with that? Studies have shown that women who make the first move tend to have more successful relationships than those waiting on a guy to swoop them off their feet. Women are 2.5 times more likely to hear from a guy if women make the first move. An online dating platform called The League conducted a research study and 47

The talking stage is not a new thing. Years ago, people used the term “courting,” which involved getting to know someone more and building intimacy before committing to marriage. Nonetheless, the global pandemic has shifted the way we view dating. If you want the talking stage to progress into something more, make sure to express your needs, discovered that one in three couples, where the wants and expectations in an honest way that will woman initiated the conversation first, resulted in benefit the relationship. Before becoming someone’s an engagement. “Make Your Move: The New Science girlfriend or boyfriend, you want to have similar of Dating and Why Women Are in Charge” by Jon beliefs and morals as your partner. Birger teaches women how to ditch those dating apps The book titled “I Never Thought Of It That Way” and how to find the right person by just making the by Monica Guzman provides great examples on how first move. to create those deeper conversations that could “Well, what are you guys?” “Oh, we’re just talking.” potentially enhance the quality of the relationship. But what does that actually mean? The talking stage The book discusses philosophical questions that may is when you text someone every day for days, weeks be difficult for some to answer. The talking stage is or even months… but you’re not yet committed to meant to blossom the connection into an intimate each other. The purpose of this stage is to get to know relationship, and the questions in this book could someone before committing to a relationship with bring out responses you would have never expected. them. A lot of people can find this stage very drainAfter talking to someone for a while, the first date ing, and some say it can be a “waste of time.” However, occurs. The nerves are up. The excitement is bubbling it’s not just women who feel this way. Young people because the date is finally happening. Emotions are all over the world have stated that they struggle with all over the place — from overthinking to this modern age of dating. stomach-aching to wanting to cancel at the last 48

minute. We’ve lost count of how many “Do I really have to go on this date?” texts we’ve received from our friends. It’s not that we don’t want to go because we truly do. It’s the nerves that consume us and make us believe crazy thoughts. However, this is normal. Unfamiliar social situations can evoke feelings of anxiety and curiosity. We’re opening our hearts up to someone we’re not familiar with, and it can be an intimidating experience. Of course, past first date experiences can impact how we’re feeling about going on a new first date. Once we can identify the roots of our anxiety jitters, we can start to calm ourselves. Going on a first date is supposed to be a fun and thrilling time, not a stressful one. If it’s a stressful time, they’re probably not the one for you. “Just Send the Text” by Candice Jalili is a self-guide book made for those dealing with stress and anxiety in modern-age dating. This book discusses how to go on first dates in today’s age and gives advice to all single women in their 20s. When do you know when you’re in the honeymoon phase? Life feels perfect. The relationship tends to have more good days than bad, and everything just feels right. Maybe you feel an intense need

to be around your partner more, or your sexual drive is at its all-time high. These intense emotions are created by the dopamine (pleasure hormone) entering your brain, so every touch, feeling, look or thought about your partner comes with desire and lust. However, every good thing can come with repercussions. Since you’re thinking about how they might be “the one” during this stage, you can tend to ignore the red flags from your partner. They want to uphold the positive image that they created in their mind about their partner. Nothing could go wrong. The perfect book to recommend while going through the honeymoon phase is “I Love You Most” by Georgy B. This short, poetry-styled book discusses how it feels to be in love with your partner during this stage of the relationship. Your partner is the only thing that matters in life, and you couldn’t be happier. During the honeymoon phase, people will tend to

forget about their friendships and solely focus on their partner. Not only is this damaging to your friendships, but it’s portraying that you can live without your friends. Hint: you can’t. During the honeymoon phase, your partner can oftentimes do no wrong. Now, it’s time to get back to reality. You’ve finally started to realize that your partner isn’t so perfect and has their faults. We’re waking up from a trance of puppy love, finding that the qualities we found cute aren’t so cute anymore. This is when things start to get real or, as others like to call it, the “make-it-or-break-it” stage. Don’t fear. If you’re looking for a longterm relationship, this step can be important to its progress. This is an important time to have those deeper conversations about the potential future together and how to progress the relationship. If your partner is unwilling to have those conversations about the future, then it’s time to rethink the relationship. The book we recommend for this period is “This Was Meant to Find You” by Charlotte Freeman. From the words of the author, “If you’re hurting, healing, feeling, letting someone go or starting a new chapter and learning to open your heart back up again, this book was meant to find you when you needed it most.” Decisions, decisions. You’ll be faced with deep conflicts that can be hard to navigate, including family dynamics, beliefs, morals and more. A key to getting through this stage is strong communication and learning how to compromise. At this step in the relationship, you know everything about each other. People can feel too comfortable in the relationship and don’t want to leave. Not only is this damaging to the relationship, but it’s causing an emotional strain on your partner. The book “Stay or Leave” by Alain de Botton offers clarity when facing difficult situations in your relationship. The person who was once your seemingly silly crush is now going to potentially be your partner for life one day. This is the stage you 50

DESIGN | SIDNEY ROTHKIN PHOTO | ANA LUISA SCHOLTES dreamed of when you first saw them. You made it here. Since you’ve made it this far, it hasn’t always been rainbows and sunshine, but you’ve been able to navigate these issues together which builds your bond even stronger. This feels refreshing and bittersweet. Regardless of how long you’ve been together with your partner, this will allow your partner to express themselves openly and wholeheartedly. Since you’re settling down with your partner, the hormone oxytocin is released, and this can increase attachment, regulate the immune system and decrease fear, pain and stress. It’s vital to approach these feelings with ease. “All About Love: New Visions” by Bell Hooks discusses the many altitudes of a relationship. The author offers a reevaluation of self-love that will bring peace to our personal and professional lives. Hooks proves that love heals all things. Hurt. Betrayed. Denial. Sadness. Numbness. These are all just a few words to describe how breaking up with someone you love feels. Love isn’t what

you thought it was. “Everything I Know About Love” by Dolly Alderton discusses all the dates, hookups and relationships she’s had in her 20s, but she says that love isn’t romantic. She can’t identify love from her romantic relationships but feels love from her friendships. She knows her friends better than herself. The real love isn’t the person you take to bed, but it’s the friends you surround yourself with. They’ll stick around longer than any date. It’s also okay to be alone romantically. “I don’t want to die alone” is a common fear for many, but are we actually dying alone when we have our friends by our side? A romantic relationship isn’t linear and neither is life. Any relationship is going to have its ups and downs, but any good relationship will prosper through the bad. The bad doesn’t define your relationship. How you and your partner overcome the negative and work together will represent your true relationship. Reading books will not benefit just yourself, but your relationship as a whole.

FRIENDS (without benefits) THE IMPORTANCE OF PLATONIC FRIENDS

KAILEY CASL

hen you think about love, what comes to mind? Your parents? Grandparents? Significant other? But what about your friends? Friendship serves as one of the most beautiful forms of human connection. Standing next to you through highs and lows, friends are found family. Dolly Alderton famously wrote, “Nearly everything I know about love, I’ve learned from my long-term friendships with women.” This quote, from her book “Everything I Know About Love” sparked a TikTok trend in 2022, giving hundreds of thousands of female friendships the rom-com edit they deserve. The videos posted to this sound clip showcased female friendship in action. Content ranged from candle lit dinner parties to coffee-shop dates to career advancement celebrations to quieter moments on the couch with captions that read, “This is love.” Another TikTok trend gaining momentum in 2023 features audio from the movie “Love Actually” by the one and only Hugh Grant. The sound clip says, “If you look for it, I’ve got a sneaky feeling that love is actually all around.” This trend features clips of strangers in love: a couple holding hands crossing the street, a long awaited hug at the airport and a shared belly

laugh, where happy tears are shed in a restaurant. These trends have sparked a movement of people acknowledging that platonic love is everywhere; shared between co-workers, classmates, friends and even strangers. Whether you’re whispering in the back of a class with a peer, walking to a coffee shop with a roommate or running errands with a friend, love is all around us. Intimacy is everywhere, especially in our platonic relationships. All time classic “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off ” reminds us “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once and a while, you might miss it.” So what is platonic intimacy? Platonic love is the love you share with your friends, your crew, your circle. You share this type of love with people you feel deeply connected with but aren’t romantically connected to. We’re talking about your people — those once-in-a-lifetime friendships where you effortlessly click with the other person. People who you share a comfortable and easy connection with. People you lean on and lift up. Your people. The difference between any friend and someone you are intimately connected to is comfortability.

Intimacy, in its simplest form, is the degree of closeness and the bond that exists between you and another person. While most people classify intimacy as physical/sexual intimacy between themselves and their significant other, there are five types of intimacy, and they can appear in platonic friendships as well. The five intimacy types are physical, emotional, intellectual, spiritual and social. In a friendship, physical intimacy may look like bear hugs, holding hands or even nudging someone’s shoulder. Emotional intimacy could look like sharing a vulnerable story, while intellectual intimacy could look like asking a “dumb” question and feeling safe in doing so. Social intimacy may look like attending a fitness class together or running errands, while spiritual intimacy may look like sharing similar religious beliefs, morals or values. All of these interactions are classified as intimate because you and your friend are experiencing this while feeling safe and comfortable in doing so. Platonic love is frequently overlooked because, as a society, the majority of us follow a cultural hierarchy of love, with romantic love placed above all else. But, according to research from Trends in Cognitive Science, “Friendship is the single most important factor influencing our health, well-being and happiness,” not romantic relationships. 54

So why is platonic love important? Happiness is contagious — don’t roll your eyes, it actually is! Psychology Today recently reported many emotions, such as peace, happiness and joy can spread through a friend group just like the common cold. A study from Harvard Medical School found that having a happy friend can increase your chances of being happy by 15%. On a fundamental level, people need people. We each need a community of people to connect with and ultimately grow with and push us forward. Friendship allows us to feel whole and express ourselves in different ways. Having friends is very good for our health, and not having them can be detrimental. Additionally, people with strong friendships tend to live longer and have stronger physical and mental health. One commonality between people who live in “Blue Zones,” which are areas of the world where people consistently live over the age of 100, is a strong sense of community and a social network of friends. According to the American Psychological Association, friends directly lower one’s risk of death and improve your quality of life. Friendship is a sanctuary in this chaotic symphony of life. Nothing is more beautiful than our platonic relationships – bound not by sex, desire or money – bound solely by a simple commitment to keep showing up for one another. To uplift, support and invest in each others’ journeys. Friendship is the backbone to our individual health, happiness and longevity.

-Dolly Alderton

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ife. DESIGN | CLARA TRUEBNER PHOTO | REESE GARRITY

DESIGN | AVERY SLEEPER PHOTO | JULIA HARDY

How

Diamonds Best Friend became A girl’s

History behind the iconic gemstones LEXI ANGERMUELLER

iamonds are a girl’s best friend — it’s a tale as old as time. They are what women seek when their partner wants to pop the question. They are what loved ones buy to commemorate the milestones of their relationships. They are the extra something to embellish the perfect date outfit. Diamonds are, without a doubt, the most timeless symbols of love in the world. But how did diamonds become associated with courtship and romance? What is it about these gemstones that have garnered so much praise throughout the centuries? Let’s take a glimpse into the history of diamonds and how they became the sparkling romantic symbol that they are today.

How Diamonds Came Into Fashion Diamonds have been around since before people can remember. But when exactly did they become a sparkling item of wear? The precious gemstones can be dated back to 4th century India, where diamonds were found in abundance and often used for religious purposes. Though they were introduced to Europe in 327 B.C.E. by Alexander the Great, it wasn’t until the 10th century that diamonds started being incorporated into jewelry pieces. Their designs were limited, as the point cut wasn’t invented until later on. It took centuries until diamonds were professionally cut and finished for various wears. Diamonds became even more accessible to the public by the 20th century after the discovery of diamond mines in both South Africa and Australia. By then, the popularity of diamond jewelry exploded.

Popularity of Wedding Rings What better way to show commitment and admiration than through a band with a perfectly cut diamond? Diamond engagement rings have been a constant in wedding traditions. Technically speaking, wedding rings have been around since the Roman Empire. But diamonds didn’t come into marital fashion until the 15th century when Archduke Maximillian of Austria commissioned the first ever diamond engagement ring for his fiancée, Mary of Burgundy (Everyone says, “Thank you, Maximilian!”). The sparkling stone soon became a fashion trend among nobility and royalty throughout Europe, often featured in proposals and other royal processions. The sparkly rings were seen more as a symbol of status and wealth than of love, as only royal and aristocratic families could afford them. It wasn’t until the late 1930s that diamond rings were seen in a more romantic light, thanks to the diamond firm De Beers’ famous campaign “Diamonds are Forever.” The ad campaign revolutionized the idea and value of diamonds, using various marketing techniques like the four C’s for a diamond’s value (cut, clarity, color and carat). Famous Hollywood celebrities were also seen sporting diamond wear in their ads. Because of this influential movement, diamonds transitioned from being a shiny piece of jewelry to a dazzling symbol of courtship and beauty. 60

Most Iconic Diamonds Worn by Royalty and Celebrities Whether it’s from a loving union or a dazzling movie promotion, there’s no doubt that these famous diamonds worn by global icons have crossed your mind when it comes to fashion history. Let’s take a look at a few fashion icons that have worn these gorgeous gemstones.

Queen Elizabeth II — Kohinoor Diamond Known as one of the largest cut diamonds in the world, the Kohinoor Diamond is the crown jewel of English royalty — literally. The diamond is set in the Imperial State Crown, which is only displayed when a royal member is crowned as the ruler of England. No crowning has been more iconic than the crowning of Queen Elizabeth II, who sported the famous diamond at her coronation in 1957. “Uneasy lies the head that wears the crown,” especially when that crown has a 106-carat diamond.

Audrey Hepburn — Tiffany Yellow Diamond Found in 1878, the Tiffany Yellow Diamond is a gorgeous canary yellow diamond, weighing in at nearly 130 carats. Though the gemstone was first debuted by American socialite Mary Whitehouse at the 1957 Tiffany Ball, the Tiffany Yellow Diamond gained official recognition in 1961 by movie star Audrey Hepburn. To promote her movie “Breakfast at Tiffany's,” Hepburn was photographed with the diamond, which was fashioned into a ribbon-inspired necklace made by jewelry designer Jean Schlumberger. The promotional photoshoot marked this brilliant stone as one of the most recognized jewelry pieces in fashion history.

Lady Gaga — Tiffany Yellow Diamond Diamonds in general are iconic and generational, so this diamond alone deserves a second mention. Since its debut at the “Breakfast at Tiffany’s” photoshoot, the Tiffany Yellow Diamond hadn’t made another public appearance until 2019, when Lady Gaga wore the fabulous gemstone to the Oscars. Marked as the third person in the jewel’s history to wear it, Lady Gaga wore the Tiffany Yellow Diamond in a new necklace style with an Alexander McQueen black gown and gloves, honoring the diamond legacy of Audrey Hepburn. What comes around goes around, and the Tiffany Yellow Diamond is no exception. 61

Dazzling Tokens of Love Aside from its jewelry history, diamonds as a whole are viewed as the ideal token of love. Every aspect of the precious gemstone can be related to the concept of commitment and romance. Like every love story, diamonds are naturally formed, extremely valuable and created in their own unique way. They come in various forms, from brilliant white dots to dazzling deep cerulean blocks. They are timeless pieces of great endurance and strength, the ideal dream of any loving relationship.

As jewelry expert and writer Tanya Dukes once said, “Every diamond is unique on the inside — so when you find the diamond that speaks to your heart and feels like a reflection of your relationship, there is a real reason why you feel drawn to it.” Diamonds are truly forever, whether it is expressing your love for another or your love for the jewel itself.

forever,

diamonds are truly

whether it is expressing your love for another or your love for the

jewel itself.

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