FEELING BLUE
COUNTRY IDOL
Performace art at its best as the legendary Blue Man Group come to the Tivoli Theatre for a two-night stand February 17 and 18. The pop cultural phenomenon that has shown up everywhere from ad campaigns to TV shows brings their current stage show to town for what will be a remarkable two evenings not to be missed.
Hometown girl makes good as Lauren Alaina returns to her old stompoing ground to perform. The former American Idol finalist and country music juggernault will perform February 7 at The Signal headlining US 101’s “Concert For A Cause” along with Filmore.
One more time before that peaceful easy feeling has you driving on a dark desert highway with cool wind in your hair. The Eagles will be landing in Atlanta for three nigts - February 7, 8 and 11 at State Farm Arena. The first two nights are sold out and tickets are running out on the 1th so you better hurry up so there won’t be a heartache tonight and you end up a desperado.
What beer way to spend Valentine’s Day evening than doing some pickin’ and grinnin’ with Grammy, CMA and ACM aard winners The Kentucky Headhunters. With a career that has spanned over three decades releasing eight albums and ton of singles on the charts you can’t lose. The Kentucky Headhunters will at Songbirds on the “South” (downstairs) stage on February 14.
TAKE IT TO THE LIMIT
ENIGMA
STILL PICKIN’
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bboonnddee dd yyoouu ttooggeetthh eerr ii nn tthhee ffiirr sstt ppll aaccee.. AA ttrr uuee ffrrii eenndd w w iill ll bbee tthh eerr ee whhee nn nnoo oonnee ee llss ee w w wii llll bbee tthh eerree –– eevveenn ffaam miill yy.. TT rruu tthh bb ee ttoolldd ,, yy oouu maayy nneevvee rr ffii nndd aa rr eeaall ffrr iieenndd .. YY oouu m ccaa nn ffiinndd aa vvaarr iiee ttyy ooff ppeeooppll ee ttoo ffiillll tthh ee vvooii dd yyoouu m maa yy ffeeee ll aa tt ttiim meess bbuu tt aallw waa yyss rr eem meem mbb eerr ttoo ttaa kkee ssoom meeoonnee eellss ee’’ss ffee eell iinnggss ii nnttoo ccoonnssii ddeerraa ttiioonn.. YYoouu aall rreeaa ddyy kknnoow w hhoow w iitt ffee eell ss rriigghh tt nnoow w.. SSuurr rroouu nndd yyoouu rrss eell ff w wiitthh ggoooodd ppee ooppllee w wii tthh ssii m mii llaa rr oorr ccoom mppll iim meenn-ttaa rryy ii nntteerree ssttss aanndd aall w waayyss rree m mee m mbb eerr iinn eevvee rryy rreell aattiioonnss hhii pp –– ffrrii eennddsshh iipp oorr rree llaa ttii oonnsshh iipp tthh aatt llii ffee ii ss aa ttw woo-waayy ss ttrreeee tt eevveerr yytthhii nngg sshh oouull dd nnoott w jjuu sstt bbee nneeffiitt oonnee ooff yyoouu..
Dear Rocco, I met a guy at work who I like. We started to get to know each other after I initiated my interest in him. The feeling soon turned mutual. We flirted constantly, and he complimented me often. A week later I found out that he has a girlfriend. I confronted him about it. He said that he felt bad and that his feelings took over. We are still close, and he still flirts with me. What should I do? Should I pursue a relationship with him? VB
DDee aarr VV BB,, TT hhee rree’’ss aa nn oolldd ss aayyii nngg –– ddoonn’’tt ccrraa pp whh eerr ee yyoouu eeaa tt.. II aaccttuuaa llll yy uu ssee tthh ee w ““ss ”” w woorrdd ,, bb uutt II dd iiggrr eess ss.. VV eerryy rr aarr eellyy ddooee ss ii tt w woorrkk oouu tt ddaa ttiinngg aa ccoo--w woorrkk -eerr .. TT hhaatt ii ss w whh yy aa ll oott ooff ccoom mpp aannii eess hh aavvee ssuu cchh aa ppoollii ccyy –– aanndd yyee ss,, iitt ii ss oofftteenn bbrrookk eenn.. TT hhee rree aarree ss ppee cciiffii cc rree aass oonnss ffoorr tthhii ss.. OO fftteenn w woorrkk ttaakk eess aa bbaacckk ssee aatt ttoo nnoonn--bbuuss iinneess ss aa ccttiivvii -ttiiee ss.. TT hhaatt bbeeii nngg ssaa iidd;; w whh eerr ee ii ss yy oouu rr hh eeaarr tt?? FFll iirr ttiinngg ccaa nn bbee iinnnnooccee nntt ffuu nn,, hh eell pp kk iillll ttii m mee aanndd hh eellpp ddee aall wii tthh tthh ee rr eedd uunndd aannccyy ooff w w woorrkk aanndd hh eellpp kk iill ll ttii m mee.. YYoouu ccaann ffoorrm m aa ssttrr oonngg aa llll iiaannccee tthh aatt hh eell ppss yyoouu bbootthh eexxccee ll iinn w w oorr kk.. YY oouu pprr oobb aabb ll yy hh aavvee hh eeaarr dd ooff tthh ee ttee rrm m – – ““ w woorrkk hhuu ss -bbaanndd”” aanndd w woorr kk w wiiffee ””.. IItt ss eeeem mss llii kkee yyoouu w waanntt m moorr ee tthh aann hh ee dd ooeess aanndd ddeeppeennddiinngg oonn hhoow w ffaa rr yy oouu rr ffllii rrttii nngg hh aass ggoonnee,, yyoouu nneeee dd ttoo tthh iinnkk iiff hh ee ii ss aaccttii nngg aaw waa yy w w iitthh yyoouu kk nnoow w -iinngg hhee hh aass aa ggiirr llffrr iiee nndd,, tthhaa tt ii ff yyoouu aarr ee tthh ee ggiirrll ffrrii eenndd hh oow w w woouull dd yyoouu ffee eell iiff hhee aaccttee dd ttoow waa rrdd ss ootthhee rr woom w meenn tthh ee w waa yy hhee aaccttss ttoow w aarrdd ss yyoouu nnoow w?? Dear Rocco, I’ve tried to flirt with boys but I’m very shy and I can’t make eye contact with them unless they talk to me first. Can you tell me how to begin a conversation with boys?
RJ
DDee aarr RRJJ,, YYoouu ’’rree nnoott rreeaa ddyy ffoorr aa bbooyyffrr iieenndd.. Whh eetthh eerr yyoouu rr eeaa lliizz ee iitt oorr nnoott,, m W moosstt rree llaattii oonnss hhii ppss aarr ee ccoonnttrrooll lleedd bbyy tthh ee ffeem maa llee eexx cceepp tt ii nn rraa rr ee ccii rrcc uum m -sstt aannccee ss.. YY oouu ’’rree oobbvv iioouu ss llyy nnoott rree aaddyy aa nndd ttoo bbee hh oonneesstt ii tt m maayy bb ee aa ggoooodd tthh iinngg.. GGee tt aa ppuu ppppyy.. II tt’’ss ll iikk ee hhaa vviinngg aa bbooyyffrrii eenndd.. IIff yy oouu ccaa nn ffeeee dd iitt,, ss hh oow w iitt aaffffeeccttii oonn aanndd ccllee aann uu pp aafftteerr ii tt aanndd nnoott hh aavvee ii tt rr uunn aaw waayy oorr ddii ee oonn yyoouu ,, tthh eenn yyoouu m mii gghhtt bb ee rr eeaadd yy ffoorr aa bbooyyffrrii eenndd.. DD oonn’’tt rr uuss hh iitt;; tthh eerr ee iiss m moorree ttoo bb eeii nngg ii nn aa rr eell aattiioonnsshh ii pp tthhaa nn nnoott bbeeii nngg lloonneell yy oorr ii nnttiim maattee aaccttiivvii ttyy.. LLoovvee yyoouu rrss eell ff ffiirr sstt aa nndd tthhee nn eevvee rryyoonnee eellss ee w wiill ll – – aa nndd yyoouu wiill ll hhaa vvee aa ll oott ttoo cchh oooossee ffrroom w m.. A Anndd whh eenn yyoouu ddoo – w – cchhoooossee w wiiss eell yy..
Dear Rocco, I am engaged to a man who cannot use the word love. It is beginning to really bother me. He doesn’t use with his own family and won’t even sign a card to me saying “Love, John.” He assures me that he does have these feeling for me. I know I should feel more secure. I have tried to accept this but it is becom- Rocco is a common sense, tell-iting more difficult. like-it-is, no-nonsense kind of guy PB offering real advice on any subject put before him. Why pay thousands of dollars on a high-priced theraDDeeaarr PPNN ,, II kknnoow w eevv eerryyoonnee w waa nnttss ttoo hh eeaarr pist when he’ll straighten you out tthh oossee w w oorr dd ss.. II dd oonn’’tt kk nnoow w hh iiss for free. If you’d like advice from e-mail him at bbaacckk ssttoorryy ,, bbuu tt bbee llii eevvee iitt oorr nnoott hh ee Rocco hhaass ssaa iidd hhee ’’ss lloovvee dd yyoouu iinn m maannyy goaskrocco@yahoo.com. waayy ss – w – eess pp eecc iiaa llll yy iiff yyoouu aa rr ee
Dear Rocco, I have a friend, Peter, who has a girlfriend who hates me. She has harassed me to the extent that I had to obtain a restraining order from the courts. My friend is now telling me that our friendship should be unconditional. I disagree with him. I told him that if he was in a fight with his girlfriend and ended up in the hospital at 3:00 a.m., I would come to hospital if he called. I then asked, if I got into an accident and the hospital called him at 3:00 a.m., would he come to the hospital. His answer was no. He still says our friendship is unconditional. How can this be if it is only unconditional towards him and not me? PL
DDee aarr PPLL,, II hhaa vvee nneew w ss ffoorr yyoouu –– yyoouu rr ffrr iieenndd ii ss nnoott yyoouu rr ffrrii eenndd,, hh ee’’ss oonnllyy aa ffrr iiee nndd-llyy aa ccqquu aaiinnttaa nnccee .. TThh ee ggii rrll ffrr iiee nndd ii ss oonnllyy ee xxpprree ssss iinngg tthhii nnggss yy oouurr ssoo-ccaallll eedd ffrr iiee nndd hhaa ss eeiitthh eerr rr eell aayyeedd ttoo hhee rr oorr hhaa ss ii m mpp ll iieedd .. YYoouu nneeeedd ttoo ffiigg -uurr ee oouu tt w whh yy yyoouu aa rree ffrr iiee nnddss oorr w whh aatt ENIGMA
ee nnggaa ggeedd.. SSoom meettiim mee ss tthhee w w oorr ddss aarree hh aarr dd ttoo ssaa yy dduu ee ttoo ss oom meetthh iinngg nnoott rr eell aatteedd ttoo yyoouu hh aass hh aappppeenneedd iinn hh iiss ll iiffee,, oorr ppee rrhh aappss nnee vveerr eexx ppee rriiee nncceedd tthh ee w w oorr dd ss uu nnttiill hh ee m meett yyoouu.. H H iiss aa ccttii oonnss ssppeeaa kk m muucchh lloouu ddee rr tthh aann woorr ddss .. II hh aavvee ffrriiee nnddss tthhaa tt tthhrr oow w w aa rroouu nndd tthhee w woorr dd llii kkee tthh eeyy aa rree tthh rroow wii nngg aarr oouunndd aa ffoooottbb aall ll.. LLiittttllee tthh iinnggss –– ss iill llyy tthh iinnggss yyoouu oovvee rrll ooookk ll iikk ee m maakkii nngg ssuu rree yy oouu ’’rree nnoott hh uunnggrr yy oorr tthh iirr ssttyy,, hhaa ss yyoouu ttee xxtt hhii m m w whhee nn yyoouu ggee tt hh oom mee ttoo m maakk ee ssuu rree yyoouu ggee tt hh oom mee ss aaffee oorr rr ee m mee m mbb eerr ii nngg aa nn ii m mpp oorrttaanntt dd aattee ll iikk ee aa bb iirr tthhdd aayy – – ee vveenn iiff ii tt’’ss jjuu sstt aa ggrr eeee ttii nngg aarree w waayyss ooff sshh oow wiinngg ll oovv ee aanndd //oorr rr eess ppee cctt.. SShh oow wiinngg yyoouu rreess pp eecctt ii ss aann aa cctt ooff ll oovv ee iinn tthhee m moosstt ppll aattoonniicc w waayy.. TT hhee ffaacctt yyoouu aa rree aa llw waa yyss oonn hhii ss m miinndd (( w whh yy eellss ee w woouu lldd yyoouu bb ee ggee ttttii nngg maarr rrii eedd ??)) sshh oow m wss m mee hh ee lloovvee ss yyoouu.. DD oonn’’tt w w oorr rryy aatt ss oom mee ppooiinntt tthh ee w woorrdd wii llll ccoom w mee aa nndd w whhee nn iitt ddooee ss ii tt w wii llll meeaa nn aa w m whh ooll ee ll oott m moorree ttoo yyoouu aatt tthh aatt ppooii nntt tthhaa nn ii tt ddooeess nnoow w..
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ARIES (Mar. 21- April 20) Underhandedness regarding legal matters or contracts must be counteracted. Groups you belong to will not only enjoy your company, but they will also share your interests. Opportunities to make financial gains through investments look promising. You may need to lend an ear to an old friend.
LEO (July 23-Aug 22) Don’t try to hide your true feelings from your mate. Travel for business or pleasure will be enlightening. Don’t let your anger consume you and don’t allow important matters go unattended to. Organize all the responsibilities that have to be attended to and make sure everyone knows what to do.
Your luckiest events this month Your luckiest events this month will occur on a Tuesday. will occur on a Monday. TAURUS (Apr. 21- May 21) Any difficulties with peers could be unnerving. Cultural activities open your eyes to new ways of doing things. Sort situations out as best you can. Watch your spending habits. Pleasure trips or friendly get-togethers will be satisfying and intellectually stimulating.
VIRGO (Aug. 23 -Sept. 23) You’re on the right track and you can make money if you are willing to go out on a limb. Your attitudes at work will open new avenues for you. Visit friends or relatives who have been confirmed. Invest wisely. Your personal life could have you tied up in knots.
Your luckiest events this month Your luckiest events this month will occur on a Sunday. will occur on a Monday. GEMINI (May 22-June 21) Your irritability may drive your loved ones crazy. You could be tempted to overspend on unnecessary items. You should get involved in competitive sports this month. Your diplomacy will be of utmost importance this month.
LIBRA (Sept. 24 -Oct. 23) Take a different approach; make an offer they just can’t refuse. You will be in a high cycle regarding work. You are best not to confide in anyone right now. Don’t be too confident that coworkers are on your side.
Your luckiest events this month Your luckiest events this month will occur on a Thursday. will occur on a Saturday. SCORPIO (Oct. 24 - Nov. 22) Go out with close friends who understand your situation and your needs. Take time to look at any outdated papers or possible investments. Keep your cash in your pocket and offer them sound advice rather than your financial assistance. You will be able to dazzle others with your obvious charm Your luckiest events this month and your outgoing nature. will occur on a Monday.
Your luckiest events this month will occur on a Thursday. will occur on a Monday. AQUARIUS (Jan. 21 -Feb. 19) SAGITTARIUS Insincere gestures of friendliness (Nov. 23 -Dec. 21) Your lover may be annoyed if you are likely to occur. Your anger may have been flirtatious or not atten- be impossible to contain if you get tive to their needs. You will also into debates with family members. encounter individuals who can Do some research if you want to help you further your goals. Try to find information that you can make arrangements with close apply against the opposition you friends or relatives to spend a few face. You can make wonderful condays away. Be aware that minor tributions to any organization that accidents or injury may prevail if you join. you are preoccupied. Your luckiest events this month Your luckiest events this month will occur on a Wednesday. will occur on a Wednesday. PISCES (Feb. 20-Mar. 20) CAPRICORN Reciprocate by offering helpful (Dec 22.- Jan. 20) Seminars will provide you with hints. Do a little investigating if knowledge and amusement. You there is someone at work you don’t will find their philosophies worth trust. Check into art objects or preexploring. Deep discussions may cious stones. You can do well in only lead to friction. You may find group endeavors. Communications yourself in an uncomfortable situa- with loved ones may be strained. tion if you have overloaded your Your luckiest events this month plate unintentionally. will occur on a Wednesday. Your luckiest events this month
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The Best of New Wave, Post Modern Classics and Other Odd Stuff
CANCER (June 22-July 22) Visitors are likely to drop by and chances are, they may even stay a little longer than you want them to. You can expect your mate to get fed up and make the choices for you or back off completely. Empty promises will cause confusion. Deceit with coworkers is apparent.
ENIGMA
Wednesdays at 5pm est. on wawl.org
FEBRUARY 2020
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Traffic Law “Enforcement In Chattanooga And Its Environs: Accidents And Road Rage Coming Soon Recently I was driving home from East Ridge when I observed yet another crazy bit of stunt driving that could have easily gotten someone killed. I was northbound on Highway 153 near the Lee Highway exit when I observed a truck in the slow lane speeding past cars. This truck blew by me on the inside, crossed to the fast lane then in his best NASCAR imitation he went across three lanes to exit onto the Shepherd Road exit. There was no way he could have known if the lanes were clear. Even my brother riding with me said, “That was pretty stupid” and he never comments on other drivers’ craziness like I do. However, he was not a cop for thirty plus years like I was. I wondered as I often do where the formerly very visible and active in traffic enforcement Chattanooga Police Department was I have
noticed a lack of traffic enforce- effect. I had just told my brother ment on Hwy 153 for a good while that I wished the “County” would now. run radar in that school zone as people sped through it all the time.
Later on the same ride I was traveling on Middle Valley Road doing the posted 15 miles an hour in a school zone. The lights were flashing visibly to let drivers know the school zone speed limit was in
Right then I noticed a car coming up from behind at a rapid pace. I knew they were going well over 15 as they were catching up to me
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Founder: D.A. Weinthal Like us on Facebook Follow us on Twitter @EnigmaMag www.enigmaonline.com ENIGMA
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very fast from a good distance back. The car swerved to his left as if to pass, ignoring the double yellow line on the road, but he was blocked by oncoming traffic. The driver then began see-sawing back and forth in his imitation of a car waiting to blow by the pace car at a NASCAR race. He jerked back and forth until traffic was clear then he passed me. He then zoomed up the road .He finally got caught behind a car going the speed limit and when he stopped briefly for traffic at a stop sign I was able to get his tag number.. I posted the picture of the vehicle and described the crazy driving in a post on Facebook. I asked the ‘HCSO” (county sheriffs department) “how about some radar there?” I never got a response.
I frequently drive Hwy 153 from Hixson and through the I75/I24 “split. There is a construction area there conspicuously posted as 45 MPH. I get my “doors blown off” running at speeds ten miles and over that. I am pretty good at “guestimating” speed from my cop career and these cars are running an easy 20 to 25 MPH over the speed limit yet I never see any traffic enforcement in this area.
I remember a few years back (I retired in 2013) that if you drove on Hwy 153 during the day you would often see someone pulled over or a car sitting up an entrance ramp apparently running radar. I know one time as a robbery detective I was en route to a robbery in progress call when pursued by one of these cars. Perhaps a rookie who didn’t recognize an unmarked “Crown Vic” or see the blue lights on the front of my car? I notified the dispatcher to tell the unit he was chasing an unmarked car and he fell off in the distance. But I digress; the point is that the Chattanooga Police Department actively worked traffic enforcement. People knew not to go too fast over the limit or there were good odds they would get a ticket. I can’t help but wonder why the PD has seemingly gotten away from such active traffic law enforcement. I see more and more aggressive drivers (road rage) than ever before. I know what you’re thinking... he was driving a police car so they didn’t do crazy stuff in front of him. Wrong. Most of the time I was driving an unmarked car that didn’t look like a police car. Can you say Pontiac Bonneville, metallic green Ford Crown Vic or Silver Crown Vic with New York plates? I frequently stopped people for very high speed ( my favorite was a lady running 90 to 100 with children in the car on the way to church), swerving their car at people who had flipped them off and other such hi-jinks. I was in an unmarked car and did not have to intervene but hey, I thought that was not just
my job, but my sworn duty. This to ticket drivers at some interseccrazy driving causes accidents and tions and high accident sections of people get hurt and die. some roads. However, studies have shown and people will attest that Some may ask, “why does he care, being pulled over and ticketed or he’s retired?” This is true but I warned by an officer has an effect don’t want innocent people getting on their driving after that; much hurt and killed by these often more so than receiving a ticket by thoughtless and reckless drivers. I mail days or weeks later. have friends and family frequently traveling the local roadways. Plus What are some answers for these myself. issues? There are grants available for overtime especially traffic Do I have any statistics that the enforcement. As I mentioned when accident rate is up? No I don’t. I do I was a detective I stopped people know that the Highway Safety for traffic infractions. Chiefs and Administration and most law sheriffs could encourage their enforcement agencies gauge their detectives to actively address trafenforcement success on the num- fic violators. School Resource ber of traffic fatalities. This num- Officers could be utilized to ber can be misleading as if an acci- enforce traffic violators in the dent victim dies later from the school zones of their assigned effects of the crash is this death schools. These are just some suglisted as a fatal injury due to that gestions. I’m sure a creative admincrash? People can receive severe istrator could come up with ways brain trauma and while still to come up with the resources. As remaining technically alive they far as negative interactions as long are being kept so by machinery. as the officers conduct themselves The fatality rate from crashes has in a professional manner this gone down often not due to lesser should not be an issue. Body camoccurrences due to advances in medical treatment. Wartime treatment of traumatic injuries has given rise to more treatment in the civilian realm where on scene treatment by paramedics and EMTs frequently saves lives. Ask a doctor or nurse what a modern trauma unit can do to save lives these days. It is amazing. So even though the number of fatalities from crashes may be down due to advances in medical treatment, the number of serious injury crashes going up? Who defines what a “serious injury” crash is? I would like to see these statistics. I don’t know why traffic law enforcement seems to be less in the past few years. Is it a lack of manpower? Is it a reluctance to have a probably negative interaction with citizens when support for law enforcement appears to be very low or is it political interference? Maybe it’s a little of each. I know some cameras are being used ENIGMA
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eras will support the officer’s actions and suppress false allegations. A public information campaign to educate the public as to why traffic enforcement is being stepped up could be implemented if the administrators/politicians feel it is necessary. Of course there are some who will say “good deal, the cops aren’t pulling people over.” However, when they or their family or friends are the victims of a speeding, intoxicated or impaired driver or someone road raging I bet they feel differently. Plus traffic stops have led to officers solving all types of crimes from burglaries and robberies to rape, kidnapping and murder. The Oklahoma City Bomber was apprehended due to a traffic stop. Hopefully they will step up their efforts in the traffic enforcement. The life they save might be of someone I know.
- Mark Haskins
A South Carolina woman was arrested for allegedly beating a man in his 60s, after the man drunkenly passed gas in her face. Witnesses told police that 33-yearold Jessica Cerney was asleep on her couch in her Myrtle Beach residence when 64-year-old Darrell McNight entered the home and farted in her face. “[McKnight] came into the house intoxicated and ‘passed gas’ is [Cerney’s] face while she was laying on the couch,” according to the police report. The two were arguing over the incident and [McKnight] walked toward
[Cerney] cursing in a “threatening manner.” [Cerney] stated that she pulled her arms down and when McKnight bent down she struck him in the face approximately three times with a closed fist.” McKnight had to be taken to the hospital for treatment to a swollen right eye while Cerney did not suffer any injuries. Both parties were issued citations for fighting. It is unclear if they knew each other prior to the incident. A mom in Florida forced her daughter to ingest tapeworms in order to slim down for competition. Upon checking into the emergency room with severe stomach pains, nurse
ENIGMA
Maricar Cabral-Osorio thought the teen was pregnant. But an ultrasound showed no fetus — although there was an inexplicable growth in her intestines. The unfortunate teenage contestant’s condition became clear upon a fateful trip to the bathroom. “It was a toilet bowl full of tapeworms,” Cabral-Osorio recalled. “It was so gross and she had pooped all these tapeworms. There were a couple that were very long and wiggling around trying to get out of the toilet bowl.” Having passed the parasites, the teen was then assumed to be fine. After an apparent fight between the mother and daughter, it became clear the mother bought a pill of tapeworm
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eggs in Mexico and forced her daughter to take it to lose weight for an upcoming pagent. It is unclear when the incident occurred or if criminal charges were brought against the mother. Witnesses and investigators are reacting with astonishment after a high-speed pursuit ended with a car launched clear across the San Joaquin River separating Fresno and Madera Counties in California. Fresno County Coroner’s Office identified the driver as 58-year-old David Callahan of Fresno.
According to Fresno Police, before Callahan drove off the cliff, he was driving recklessly near Herndon and Parkway Drive around 8:30 a.m. “The vehicle was driving recklessly and actually drove past an officer,” said Sgt. Bob Reynolds. Callahan led police on a chase and officers say he eventually drove off the cliff near Dickenson and Herndon. He was airborne for about 400 feet and crossed an entire of the San Joaquin River, and crashed onto the other side in Madera County. “He went down to Barstow, hung a U-turn and hit the lip,” said witness Bryan Zollars. “Like at a hundred miles per hour, he cleared the whole damn river.” “This is just me eyeballing it, but from what it looks like, it looks like at some point the vehicle landed completely on its top,” said CHP Officer Matt Zulim. The impact of the crash killed the driver at the scene. “What may have been going through his mind to drive this fast?” said Zulim “And to do what he did in his car today.. He jumped the San Joaquin River. It’s an absolute tragedy. You never want
to see someone die especially in marked his 60th day Monday in the this fashion.” wine barrel mounted to the top of the pole in Dullstroom and said he Popeyes Lousiana Kitchen provided expects to break the Guinness a Canadian woman with $10,000 World Record Jan 20 — although worth of food after she mistook a that won’t mark the end of his gameshow question about the car- attempt. Kruger said he is currenttoon sailor for the fast-food restau- ly aiming to beat the record by a rant. Eve Dubois gained viral atten- full week, possibly longer. He said tion after excitedly answering his biggest safety concern at the “chicken” when asked to “name top of the pole is lightning. Kruger Popeye’s favorite food” in an said a bolt of lightning narrowly episode of Family Feud Canada. missed his pole only a few days Her family watched in stunned into his attempt. silence as she danced before eventually realizing her error and gasp- David Ostrom, 40, of Paola, Kansas, ing as her opponent answered claims in court documents that his “spinach,” the favorite cuisine of ex-wife, Bridgette Ostrom, 38, has the main character from the classic “destroyed (him) legally.” He asked cartoon. On Friday, however, the Iowa District Court in Shelby Popeyes announced they had County to give him 12 weeks “lead decided to offer Dubois a consola- time” in order to source or forge tion prize. “Our survey says that katana and wakizashi swords so he you got that right,” the company can meet his ex-wife and her attorwrote. “DM us to claim your ney “on the field of battle where $10,000 worth of Popeyes.” (he) will rend their souls from their corporal bodies.” “To this day, A South African man seeking a trial by combat has never been Guinness World Record said he is explicitly banned or restricted as a nearly two months into his attempt right in these United States,” to spend 67 days living in a barrel Ostrom argues in court records, at the top of a pole. Vernon Kruger adding that it was used “as recent-
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ly as 1818 in British Court.” Ostrom said the motion stemmed from his frustrations with his ex-wife’s attorney, Matthew Hudson. “I think I’ve met Mr. Hudson’s absurdity with my own absurdity,” he said. Hudson argued that because a duel could end in death, such ramifications likely outweigh those of property tax and custody issues. The court has not yet ruled on either party’s motions. Ostrom, who said he doesn’t have any experience with sword fighting, doesn’t anticipate the judge will let his request go forward, but he wants an answer anyway. When asked if he were serious about the dueling offer, Ostrom said, “If Mr. Hudson is willing to do it, I will meet him. I don’t think he has the guts to do it.” A 45-year-old man caught with child pornography had a novel defense in court; he claimed he identified as an 8-year-old girl. Facing up to 20 years in prison, Joseph Gobrick told a judge in Michigan that he had a First Amendment right to view child porn on his computer and that he
was in fact an 8-year-old girl, so it didn’t matter anyway. “I’ve always been an 8-year-old girl, and even in my drawings and fantasies I’m always an 8-year-old girl,” said Gobrick. After his claim that he was in fact a child and therefore immune from prosecution didn’t impress the judge, Gobrick resorted to implying that his oppressors were behaving like Nazis. “Under the law, Auschwitz was legal,” he said, arguing, “What you’re doing here is wrong, just as Auschwitz was.” A BASE jumper who crashed into a beach hotel during a jump gone wrong was rescued by a woman who helped him climb onto her balcony. Kody Kosloski of Michigan said he was participating in a sanctioned BASE jumping event at an Acapulco beach when a gust of wind sent him crashing into the building seconds after jumping off the roof. Kosloski’s video camera was recording as he clung to the strap of his parachute, which was caught higher up on the building, and an older woman came out onto a nearby balcony. The woman took Kosloski’s hand and helped him
onto the balcony, where he shouted to the roof that he was uninjured. Kosloski said his rescuer then offered him a glass of water.
A Colorado man made it very easy for law enforcement officials to earn their paychecks after allegedly robbing a bank while wearing a shirt with his name on it. According to police, John David Martinez went to a Wells Fargo branch in Denver wearing a personalized polo shirt bearing his name. The suspect approached a teller and said, “This is a robbery, give me the money.” To make it even easier for police, the suspect also allegedly drove his own Honda to the bank so investigators were able to use the license plate to track down Martinez. Officers showed his DMV photo to a bank employee. “That’s him. He’s the one who robbed the bank this morning,” the employee said, the Denver Channel reported. After an investigation that took all of five hours, Martinez was arrested. While he was in custody, Martinez reportedly said he had “told his wife that he had borrowed the money and did not tell her that he had robbed the bank.” The 68year-old was booked into jail in Denver on investigation of felony robbery involving $20,000 or more.
A Canadian woman who attempted to dine-and-dash was arrested after she was forced to return to the scene of the crime because she left her purse behind. Kyla Anne MacMillan had to return to an Alberta pub after skipping out on a $160 bar tab that she had rung up with two female friends. After bailing on the bill, MacMillan returned to the bar because she had left her purse containing her medication. MacMillan’s hefty tab included a pitcher of beer, chicken wings, nachos and 23 shots. According to the tab, the ladies slugged down six shots of tequila, 10 B-52s, six Dirty Hookers and one vodka shooter, the Star reported. She initially claimed that she had simply stepped outside to use an ATM, but that excuse didn’t fly. The suspect pleaded guilty to fraudulently obtaining food and was fined $325, in addition to being ordered to pay the bill. MacMillan is unemployed and only had $5.35 on her during her court appearance. At “Shooters Grill” in Rifle, Colorado all of the servers at the restaurant pack heat as they shuttle plates of food to diners, from Glock semi-automatics to .357 sixshooters. On the wall, posted alongside copies of the Declaration of Independence and Bill of Rights, is a sign declaring that those inside are still “proudly clinging to my guns and Bible.” Owner Lauren Boebert says she didn’t start out to make a statement when she began carrying a pistol on her hip a month after opening Shooters, but
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through the months her other waitresses thought it was kind of fun and they, too, started carrying in this small town 180 miles west of Denver. “We don’t worship guns. We worship Jesus,” said Boebert, a mother of four whose husband works in the oil industry. “We’re here to serve people.” Menu items include the M16 burrito, the Swiss and Wesson grilled cheese, and “Locked and Loaded nachos.” “I’m from Texas,” said one diner. “This is normal.” And that’s just how Boebert sees it. Rifle is hunting country with outfitters offering to help visitors track down and shoot elk and deer roaming the nearby high-country forests and canyons. Legend says the area got its name when a surveyor left his gun leaning against a tree and marked his map with “rifle” to remind himself where it was. Denver-based Chipotle burrito chain asked gun owners to stop bringing guns into the company’s stores, and Starbucks also asked gun owners to leave their weapons behind when buying coffee. However, in Rifle, Boebert said the local Starbucks franchisee has no problem when she walks in wearing her Springfield XDS .45. A sign on the front door welcomes armed patrons and asks them to abide by the same rules but adds, “in such cases, judicious marksmanship appreciated.” “There’s no point to be made,” Boebert said as her waitresses refilled ketchup bottles and wiped down menus, readying for the dinner rush. “This is our way of life.”
Get Off My Lawn I was at a celebration of life for a good friend of mine, Lloyd Stanley. At the service I ran into a good friend of mine, retired judge Walter Williams. I had a thought if all whites were like Lloyd and all blacks were like Walter, we would have no racial problems.
Remember, if you know no better, Remember, take what you can get. there is no better. If you act too greedy, you won’t get sh**. Last night I woke up in the bed all alone. It’s okay, I like who I was Damn delivery trucks should use with. the truck parking spaces instead of parking in the street 30 yards It’s important to like yourself, to from it. hell with people who have a different opinion. Why do the police block the street when making a stop when there is It’s official, just got the real word plenty of room to move over – UT is going to try and field a worse still is when they park in football team next year. the driving lane heading the wrong way.
Bud’s happy hour prices are great, check them out. What the hell is wrong with the highway bridges around here— part of the infrastructure around the country that is falling apart. To hell with foreign aid, take that money and fix our country bridges, tunnels, roads, dams, etc. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again - get the women off the football field. What are they doing making comments and doing interviews - if they haven’t played the game, get back in the stands. Had a prescription filled at CVS the other day - after insurance and deductions it was 16 cents. That’s right, 16 cents. How stupid, it cost more than that in paperwork, why not just say “no charge”? Understand the chiropractic profession will never have a connection in Washington DC – seems like there are no people with spines there. If you don’t know what you are talking about, you can’t be embarrassed when you are proven wrong.
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If you get hit by a self-driving car who do you sue, there is no driver. Have you noticed the prices creeping up since Walgreens took over Rite Aid, and is the same thing going to happen when TMobile takes over Sprint? Still can’t find out where the missing socks go in the washing machine. Still think the new red lights for
pedestrians, such as hands and What in the world is “mechanicalstick people, are going to get peo- ly separated chicken”? You see it on the label of hot dogs, lunchple killed. meat, etc. Can you picture how I’m still upset about Patten they mechanically separate a Parkway - still a muddy mess. chicken? Ugh. Where is the damn monument? Put the damn thing in the “cow CNN needs to go off the air - no real news, just their slanted posipasture”, MLK & Market Street. tion… understand they are really If Obama had the guts to take out losing market share. bin Laden even earlier, we might have saved many lives. Way to go Lost a lot of respect for some of our president with guts Donald the staff at Erlanger East hospital Trump. The News Free Press head- – you probably know what I lines state when President mean. Kennedy was killed, it was someone from the left— are they trying Looking for a store that has a the same on Trump by bullsh** good selection of clothes made in the USA, any suggestions? impeachment and charges.
- I’d rather see Obama’s birth cer- don’t have. tificate. Getting even can cost you more Are you as sick of seeing and than you know. hearing the man who sells pillows on TV? Someone gave me one, no Most people under 50 don’t have a big deal. Now he’s back trying to clue – some over 50 don’t either. sell us mattress covers – don’t get it. He also needs to tone down the Be all you can be but stop acting dye job on his hair and mous- like you’re something you’re not. tache. Just because that’s the way it’s If we bombed Iran as often as always been doesn’t mean it’s Nancy Pelosi gets bombed, there being done the right way. would be no Iran. Don’t let it worry you for being Why is the FBI file on Martin condemned for thinking out of the Luther King Jr. sealed? box. If you are out of the box they can’t put a limit on how great you Never understood why Jane Fonda can be. (whom I consider a traitor to this If you want to live under a social- When was the last time you went country) was never brought to Well, enough for now, ist government and share the to the cemetery to visit the grave trial for aiding and abetting the wealth, start tomorrow - call me of a loved one? Ever? enemy. Until Next Time, and I’ll come by and take half Trump’s tax returns before he was Thank God for what you have and Paul Burke Sr.. your stuff. President is none of our business quit complaining about what you
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Do You Make Yourself Available to Date? How often do we hear people say that they never find anyone suitable to date? No matter how hard they try, regularly checking online dating sites, accepting invitations from friends, joining various groups they never seem to meet anyone with whom they really gel. Is there something else going on or are they really ready, available to date and simply unlucky in their quest?
behaviour as they start to need you more, or become negative or critical of any potential new suitor. Pay attention to that happening and try to discuss how you’re both feeling. Provide reassurance that they’ll always be important and determine to maintain regular contact, even if at times it has to be done by phone or online.
companions, sharing hobbies and interests, maybe spending hours together over a joint love of sport, cars, etc. Some may work together and be best mates. A new girlfriend may be a major intrusion into the amount of time they usually choose to spend together. As with mothers and daughters, it can be tough to break away if the father is reluc-
If this is you, what needs to happen for you to make yourself available to date? Work can place many demands and distractions on our being available to date. Being tired, preoccupied or over committed can mean that we have little free time or energy to enthusiastically make the effort to look attractive and be receptive to someone else’s charms. Preparing to meet someone new requires a certain amount of effort, time and money and there’s not always much left over if we’re immersed in business demands, Family can be an interesting one, tant to step back and decides to deadlines and family preoccupa- especially if you’re very close to tions. your siblings or parents. Siblings may be jealous at the prospect of We may not even be sure how free their brother or sister dating, espewe’ll be to wholeheartedly pursue cially if they’ve shared a lot, have a new relationship in the coming perhaps helped each other through weeks and months. Working long tough times, survived a breakup hours or being regularly away from and spent many hours together home can put a dampener on our sharing confidences and advice, desire to date. We’re already so checking in on a regular basis. busy that even thinking about the early days of a new relationship Daughters and moms. Girls will can feel like too much effort to often say that their mom is their bother. Yet building a business or best friend, they call each other career is often done with one eye every day, discuss everything. But on our future expectations, looking there’s a saying, give your children forward to settling with a partner, roots to grow and wings to fly. having a family, building a home Some mothers struggle with letting together. go and are over-reliant on their daughters for companionship. They Taking care to find a better bal- may be possessive, loathe to lose ance in life often incorporates a their intense closeness to a new shift in mindset where we include third-party. all areas of life and make ourselves available to date. If a mother refuses to let go she can hi-jack the possibility of a burFriends know us well and may geoning new relationship for her insist that they really want to see daughter. Often in a position of us settled and loved-up in a great influence, she may always be presnew relationship, but is that really ent with money, treats, inside the case? Are you sure that deep knowledge of which buttons to down inside they’re okay about the press. She may phone regularly, existing dynamics of your friend- constantly available to help out ship changing, where your time and provide support at a minute’s and loyalty may begin to be influ- notice. How can a potential new enced by the need to consider relationship compete with such an someone else? intimate, long-established bond? You may notice a change in their Sons and dads too are often great ENIGMA
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come on strong with the guilt, loyalty or ‘why bother with him or her’ card. If you’ve started to realise how much you’re struggling to make yourself available to date, accept that the change has to come from you. You need to determine what’s going on or going wrong. Any new relationship requires effort, compromise and can sometimes feel like hard work. If you’re ultimately wanting to settle down, perhaps find a longtime companion, maybe start a family, some things may have to change. Being firmer and more assertive with some of your existing relationships may well be a step you’ll have to take. You need to be prepared to do what it takes to make yourself mentally, physically and emotionally ready to meet someone who could fulfill you and satisfy your relationship needs. Then you’ll be available to date!
- Susan Leigh
Reality Bites While Valentine’s Day is a day of The band followed up that hit with not only sing along with but dance love and romance for many of us it “Good Girls Don’t” that peaked at 11 with as well. Most songs fall into was a day of sadness for me. No, on the charts. It would take over a an either or category. “My not because of love lost or a broken heart, but power pop icon Doug Fieger passed away after a lengthy battle of brain and lung cancer on this day ten years ago. While his name may only be known by true audiophiles and the like, everyone and I mean everyone knows his band and at least the one song that defines its genre more than any other. Doug was the singer and leader of the power pop quartet The Knack. And if that name still doesn’t ring a bell, unless you’ve been living under a rock for the past 40 years you know the song “My Sharona”. The song may be one of the best known songs with the exception of “Happy Birthday” and “Hey Jude”. It has been parodied by everyone from Weird All Yankovic to even Cheech and Chong (“Cheech & Chong’s Next Movie”). It has gone away for over a decade and a half re-charting in 1994 thanks to Ben Stiller’s “Reality Bites” even being nominated for an Academy Award. Today the song remains a staple in not only rock radio formats, but also classic rock, college and alternative play lists. The Knack basically paid tribute to the Beatles with their debut album “Get The Knack” not only in name (an homage to ‘60s albums like “Meet the Beatles”, but in dress (on their debut they wore suits similar to the British Invasion acts of the early ‘60s and performed in white dress shirts and skinny black ties) and even hairstyle. Fieger wore a similar mop top style popularized by the Beatles that he wore from the late seventies until he fell ill. And the Knack paid homage with their musical style that was power pop, three-minute songs mostly about love and love lost with sharp guitar work and tight vocal harmony. The Knack was pretty much a New Wave version of the Beatles. The album rose to the top of the charts in late summer of 1979 and the songs “My Sharona” was number one for six weeks. The track was named by Billboard the best single of 1979.
©Dave Weinthal
decade for the band to achieve Sharona” falls into both. It’s a feel another top ten hit with their good song that quite frankly never “comeback” album “Serious Fun”. goes out of style and is the perfect The title track peaked at number 9 on Billboard. Three years later another generation fell in love with Fieger’s muse, Sharona when Stiller included the track on the soundtrack of his hit movie “Reality Bites”. The single shot back up the charts and back into our hearts, a place it remains still to this day. Looking at “My Sharona” one can argue it is the most perfect song ever written. It’s a timeless classic that despite being 40 years old is sung regularly by the those that sang it when it came out, their kids and in some cases even their grandchildren. The song has a universal timeless and tireless theme – unrequited love. Songs of love and lust are universal and they are relevant to any and every generation. It has the most recognizable bass and guitar parts of any song bar none. And the into… when you hear the harsh drum beat begin you’re either awaiting the bass to start or you automatically start to sing “My Sharona”. “My Sharona” is a song everyone that hears it sings along with, even if it’s only the bass line/chorus. “My Sharona” is also one of those rare songs that you ENIGMA
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mood lifter. I dare anyone not to be in a better mood after listening to the song. Whether alone or with a crowd “My Sharona” is by far perhaps the best song ever written. Doug Fieger and the Knack have left many a smile on my face and the people I have kept company since the first time I heard the song. And I remember that day. I knew my life was changed forever after hearing the simple melody and words. Despite his untimely death ironically on Valentine’s Day ten years ago, I can’t help but smile. The world is a better and more fun place thanks to The Knack and their silly love songs. And despite this busy and crazy world I will always have time for my, my, my, my Sharona - and with a song in my heart.
- Dave Weinthal
CONCERT CALENDAR “Go See Live Music”
This week’s calendar covers events for February and beyond. We would be happy to publish your free listing in future Billboards, space permitting. Simply mail us the information so that we have it 7 days before the publication date. A photograph may be sent with the announcement. Send information to: calendar@enigmaonline.com. All dates subject to change without notice.
SSA A TTU U RRD DA AYY FFeebbrruu aarryy 11 SSK KYYZZ O OO O (Chattanooga) DJ Zane TTH H EE PPAALLM M SS (Chattanooga) DJ Keith SSO ON NG GBBIIRRD DSS SSO OU U TTH H (Chattanooga) Mitch Rossell Band SSO ON NG GBBIIRRD DSS N NO O RRTT H H (Chattanooga) Emily Wolfe WAAN W ND DEE RRLLIIN NG G BBRREEW WII N NG G CCO OM MPPAAN N YY (Chattanooga) Windhorse, Rogue Poet TTH H EE CC O OM M EED D YY CCAATT CC H H (Chattanooga) Shaun Jones HII--FF II CC LLYYD H D EE’’ SS (Chattanooga) Power Players JJ..JJ..’’SS BBO OH H EEM MIIAA (Chattanooga) Bob Marley Birthday Bash SSA ATTU U RRN N (Birmingham) Mother’s Finest ZZYYD D EECC O O (Birmingham) Big Something IIRRO ON N CCIITT YY (Birmingham) Moustache the Band DRRU D UIID D CC IITTYY M MU USSIICC H H AALLLL (Tuscaloosa, AL) Ashley McBryde CCIITT YY W WIIN N EERRYY N NAASSH H VVIILLLLEE (Nashville) Delbert McClinton, Casey James HIIG H GH HW WAATT TT (Nashville) Moon Hooch D && LLIIN 33RRD ND DSSLLEE YY (Nashville) Clint Daniels, Ray Stephenson BBIIJJ O OU U TTH H EEAATT RREE (Knoxville) Scott Miller TTH H EE M M IILLLL && M M IIN NEE (Knoxville) Yonder Mountain String Band KN K NO O XXVVIILL LLEE CC IIVVIICC AAU UD D IITTO O RRIIU UM M (Knoxville) Nate Bargatze BBU U CCK KH H EEAAD D TT H HEE AATTRREE (Atlanta) Jordan Davis, Kassi Ashton TTEE RRM MIIN NAALL W WEESSTT (Atlanta) Parker McCollum VVA ARRIIEE TTYY PPLLAAYY H HO OU USS EE (Atlanta) Spafford, cbdb
SSU UN ND DA AYY FFeebbrruu aarryy 22 SSK KYYZZ O OO O (Chattanooga) Karaoke WAAN W ND DEE RRLLIIN NG G BBRREEW WII N NG G CCO OM MPPAAN N YY (Chattanooga) The Other Brothers MU M USSIICC RRO OO OM M@ @ SSM M IITTH H ’’ SS O OLL D DEE BBAARR (Atlanta) Kindo ATTLLAAN A N TT AA RRO OO OM M@ @ SS M MIITT H H’’ SS O O LLD DEE BBAARR (Atlanta) African Space Program, Sex Farm, Atlanta Space Quartet, Victor Mariachi, Curm
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MO M ON ND DA AYY FFeebbrruuaa rryy 33 TT RREEM MO ON N TT TT AAVVEERRN N (Chattanooga) Trivia Night SSK KYY ZZO OO O (Chattanooga) Karaoke SSO ON NG G BBIIRRD DSS SS O OU UTT H H (Chattanooga) Blues Open Jam CC IITT YY W WIIN NEE RRYY N N AASSH H VVIILL LLEE (Nashville) Elle Varner, J. Brown D && LLIIN 33RRD ND D SSLLEE YY (Nashville) The Time Jumpers ATT LLAAN A N TTAA RRO OO OM M@ @ SSM M IITT H H’’ SS O O LLD DEE BBA ARR (Atlanta) Steve Tombstone
TT U UEESSD DA AYY FFeebbrruuaa rryy 44 TT RREEM MO ON N TT TT AAVVEERRN N (Chattanooga) Open Mic w/ Mike McDade WAAN W ND DEE RRLLIIN NG G BBRREEW WIIN NG G CC O OM MPPA AN NYY (Chattanooga) Tyler Martelli & Maria Jordania SSK KYY ZZO OO O (Chattanooga) Karaoke EE XXIITT// IIN N (Nashville) Electric Guest, Soleima M EERRCC YY LL O M OU UN NG GEE (Nashville) Y&T TT H HEE BBAASSEEM M EEN N TT (Nashville) The Red Clay Straws TT H HEE CC O OW WAAN N (Nashville) The Wailers H EEAAVVEEN H N AATT TT H HEE M MAASSQ QU UEERRA AD D EE (Atlanta) British Lion, The Picturebooks CC O ON N CC EERRTT H HAALLLL AATT BBJJ CCCC (Birmingham) Blippi
W EED W DN NEESSD DA AYY FFeebbrr uuaarr yy 55 SSK KYY ZZO OO O (Chattanooga) Karaoke WAAN W ND DEE RRLLIIN NG G BBRREEW WIIN NG G CC O OM MPPA AN NYY (Chattanooga) Open Mic TT RRIISSH H’’ SS (Chattanooga) Karaoke w/ Choo Choo Entertainment TT H HEE CC O OM M EED DYY CC AATT CCH H (Chattanooga) Mike Paramore JJ ..JJ ..’’SS BBO OH HEE M MIIAA (Chattanooga) Open Mic Comedy WAARR M W MEEM MO ORRIIAALL AAU UD DIITT O O RRIIU UM M (Nashville) Tim & Eric TT H HEE BBAASSEEM M EEN N TT EEAASSTT (Nashville) The Adicts TT H HEE TT AABBEERRN NAACC LLEE (Atlanta) Tove Lo CC IITT YY W WIIN NEE RRYY AA TTLLAAN N TTAA (Atlanta) Elle Varner TT EERRM M IIN NAALL W W EESSTT (Atlanta) William Clark Green ATT LLAAN A N TTAA RRO OO OM M@ @ SSM M IITT H H’’ SS O O LLD DEE BBA ARR (Atlanta) Half Hot, Tyler Goforth, Sash the Bash, Tyler Lee Frush TT H HEE M MII LLLL && M MII N NEE (Knoxville) Greensky
Bluegrass, Ghost Light
TTH HU URRSSD DA AYY FFeebbrruuaa rryy 66 SSK KYY ZZO OO O (Chattanooga) DJ Zane WAAN W ND DEERRLLII N NG GEE RR BBRREEW WIIN NG G CCO OM MPPAAN N YY (Chattanooga) Danimal & Friends TT RRIISSH H’’ SS (Chattanooga) Marty Manus TT H HEE PPAALLM MSS (Chattanooga) DJ Keith, Jimmy Harris TT H HEE CCO OM MEE D DYY CC AATTCC H H (Chattanooga) Mike Paramore JJ..JJ..’’ SS BBO OH HEEM M IIAA (Chattanooga) Field Hockey, Good Grief, Speakeasy WAALLK W KEE RR TT H HEEAATT RREE (Chattanooga) Marty Stuart SSA ATT U URRN N (Birmingham) The Wailers RRYY M MAAN N AAU UD DIITT O O RRIIU UM M (Nashville) Tyler Childers CC A AN NN N EERRYY BBAALLLLRRO OO OM M (Nashville) Ryan Hurd, Niko Moon, Joey Hyde BBU UCC K KH HEE AAD D TT H H EEAATT RREE (Atlanta) Saint Motel EED DD DIIEE ’’SS AATTTT IICC (Atlanta) Tony Lucca CC IITTYY W WII N NEERRYY AATT LLAAN N TTAA (Atlanta) Leftover Salmon, Drew Emmitt ATT LLAAN A NTT AA RRO OO OM M@ @ SSM MII TTH H ’’SS O OLLD D EE BBAARR (Atlanta) Michael Angelo Baito VVA ARRIIEETT YY PPLLAAYY H HO OU USSEE (Atlanta) Space Jesus
FFRRIID D AAYY FFeebbrruuaa rryy 77 SSK KYY ZZO OO O (Chattanooga) DJ Zane TT H HEE PPAALLM MSS (Chattanooga) DJ Keith, Jimmy Harris TT RRIISSH H’’ SS (Chattanooga) Karaoke w/ Sweet T SSO ON NG G BBII RRD D SS SSO OU UTT H H (Chattanooga) Rumours, Runnin Down A Dream WAAN W ND DEERRLLII N NG G BBRREE W WIIN NG G CC O OM M PPAAN NYY (Chattanooga) Heatherly TT H HEE CCO OM MEE D DYY CC AATTCC H H (Chattanooga) Mike Paramore TT H HEE SSIIG GN N AALL (Chattanooga) Lauren Alaina JJ..JJ..’’ SS BBO OH HEEM M IIAA (Chattanooga) Michael Angelo Batio SSTT A ATT EE FFAARRM M AARREEN N AA (Atlanta) Eagles CC IITTYY W WII N NEERRYY AATT LLAAN N TTAA (Atlanta) Los Lobos VVA ARRIIEETT YY PPLLAAYY H HO OU USSEE (Atlanta) Space Jesus TT EERRM MII N NAALL W WEE SSTT (Atlanta) Kavion LLEE G GAACC YY AARREE N NAA (Birmingham) Martin Lawrence ALLAABBAAM A MAA TTH H EEAATT RREE (Birmingham) Tori Kelly RRYY M MAAN N AAU UD DIITT O O RRIIU UM M (Nashville) Tyler Childers CC IITT YY W WII N NEERRYY N N AASSH HVVIILLLLEE (Nashville) Drew Emmitt, Vince Herman O PPEE N O N CC H HO ORRD DM MU USSII CC (Knoxville) Tinsley Ellis TT EEN NN NEESS SSEEEE TTH H EEAATT RREE (Knoxville) Ko Joy
UPPCCO U OM MIIN NG G EEVVEEN NTTSS SSO ON NG G BBII RRD D SS N NO ORRTT H H (Chattanooga) Tinsley Ellis February 8 SSO ON NG G BBII RRD D SS SSO OU UTT H H (Chattanooga) LVNDR, No Pressure February 8 WAAN W ND DEERRLLII N NG G BBRREE W WIIN NG G CC O OM M PPAAN NYY (Chattanooga) TN Songwriters Week Qualifying Round February 8 TT H HEE CCO OM MEE D DYY CC AATTCC H H (Chattanooga) Mike Paramore February 8 TT H HEE SSIIG GN N AALL (Chattanooga) Koe Wetzel February 8 JJ..JJ..’’ SS BBO OH HEEM M IIAA (Chattanooga) Sound System Cultures February 8
RRYYM MA AN NA AU UD DIITT O ORRIIU UM M (Nashville) The Beach Boys February 8 WA W ARR M MEE M MO O RRIIA ALL A AU UD D IITT O ORRIIU UM M (Nashville) Alter Bridge February 8 CCII TTYY W WIIN N EERRYY N NA ASS H HVVIILLLLEE (Nashville) Los Lobos February 8 WA W ARR M MEE M MO O RRIIA ALL A AU UD D IITT O ORRIIU UM M (Nashville) Alter Bridge February 8 TTH H EE BBA ASS EEM MEE N NTT EEA ASS TT (Nashville) Kody West February 8 MIILLLL TTO M OW WN NM MU USSII CC H HA ALLLL (Bremen, GA) Crystal Gayle February 8 SSTT A ATTEE FFA ARRM MA ARREEN NA A (Atlanta) Eagles February 8 CCO O CC A A CCO O LLA A RRO O XXYY (Atlanta) Tori Kelly February 8 CCII TTYY W WIIN N EERRYY A ATT LLA AN NTT A A (Atlanta) Joan Osborne February 8 SSA ATT U URRN N (Birmingham) Amanda Shires, L.A. Edwards February 8 TTH H EE LLYYRRIICC TT H HEE A ATT RREE (Birmingham) Marty Stuart February 8 SSIID DEE TTRRA ACC K KSS (Huntsville, AL) British Lion, The Picturebooks February 8 TTH H EE CCO OM MEED D YY CCA ATT CC H H (Chattanooga) Mike Paramore February 9 JJ..JJ..’’ SS BBO OH H EEM M IIA A (Chattanooga) Maggie Schneider, Ryder Pierce February 9 TTII VVO O LLII TT H HEE A ATT RREE (Chattanooga) Jo Koy February 9 RRYYM MA AN NA AU UD DIITT O ORRIIU UM M (Nashville) The Beach Boys February 9 MA M ARRA ATT H HO ON NM MU USSIICC W WO O RRK KSS (Nashville) Hayley Kiyoko February 9 BBU UCC K KH HEE A AD D TT H HEE A ATT RREE (Atlanta) Mat Kearney February 9 TTH H EE VVIISS TTA A RRO OO OM M@ @N NA APPO OLLEE O ON N ’’SS (Atlanta) Davy Knowles February 9 VVA ARRII EETT YY PPLL A AYYH HO OU U SSEE (Atlanta) Amanda Shires February 9 TTH H EE LLYYRRIICC TT H HEE A ATT RREE (Birmingham) Mat Kearney February 10 BBRRIID DG G EESSTT O ON N EE A ARREE N NA A (Nashville) “All For The Hall Benefit” Keith Urban, Blake Shelton, Ingrid Andress, Brothers Osborne, Luke Combs, Lauren Daigle, Chris Stapleton, Tenille Townes, Tanya Tucker February 10 TTH H EE BBA ASS EEM MEE N NTT EEA ASS TT (Nashville) Eric Nam February 10 WA W ALLK KEE RR TTH H EEA ATT RREE (Chattanooga) Mat Kearney February 11 BBU UCC K KH HEE A AD D TT H HEE A ATT RREE (Atlanta) Cold War Kids February 11 SSTT A ATTEE FFA ARRM MA ARREEN NA A (Atlanta) Eagles February 11 RRYYM MA AN NA AU UD DIITT O ORRIIU UM M (Nashville) Calexico, Iron & Wine February 11 GRRA G AN ND DO O LLEE O O PPRRYY H HO OU USSEE (Nashville) Luke Combs February 11 MA M ARRSS M MU USSIICC H HA ALLLL (Huntsville, AL) Alter Bridge February 11 TTH H EE CCO OM MEED D YY CCA ATT CC H H (Chattanooga) Dale Jones February 12 JJ..JJ..’’ SS BBO OH H EEM M IIA A (Chattanooga) Open Mic Comedy February 12 TTII VVO O LLII TT H HEE A ATT RREE (Chattanooga) Drew & Ellie Holcomb February 12 CCII TTYY W WIIN N EERRYY A ATT LLA AN NTT A A (Atlanta) Donovan Frankenreiter February 12 BBU UCC K KH HEE A AD D TT H HEE A ATT RREE (Atlanta) Allen Stone February 12 TTH H EE SSO OU UN ND DSSTT A AG G EE (Nashville) Umphrey’s McGee February 12 RRYYM MA AN NA AU UD DIITT O ORRIIU UM M (Nashville) Tori Kelly February 12
ENIGMA
ALLAABBAA M A MAA TT H HEE AATTRREE (Birmingham) The Beach Boys February 12 MAARRSS M M MU USSIICC H HAALL LL (Huntsville, AL) Asleep At The Wheel February 12 SSO ON NG GBBIIRRD DSS N NO O RRTT H H (Chattanooga) Jesse Dayton Duo February 13 TTH H EE CC O OM M EED D YY CCAATT CC H H (Chattanooga) Dale Jones February 13 TTH H EE SSIIG GN NAALL (Chattanooga) Space Jesus, Tsuruda, Tiedye KY, Onhell February 13 JJ..JJ..’’SS BBO OH H EEM MIIAA (Chattanooga) Sound System Cultures February 13 WAALLK W KEERR TT H H EEAATT RREE (Chattanooga) The Wood Brothers February 13 TTH H EE CC AAVVEERRN NSS (Pelham, TN) Umphrey’s McGee February 13 IIN NFFIIN N IITT EE EE N NEE RRG GYY CC EEN NTT EERR (Duluth, GA) Andrea Bocelli February 13 VVA ARRIIEE TTYY PPLLAAYY H HO OU USS EE (Atlanta) Ross Mathews February 13 EEG GYY PPTT IIAAN N RRO OO OM M@ @ FF O OXX TT H HEE AATT RREE (Atlanta) Dru Hill February 13 TTH H EE TT AABBEERRN N AACCLLEE (Atlanta) Eric Nam February 13 TTH H EE EE AARRLL (Atlanta) Teenage Bottlerocket February 13 VVA ARRIIEE TTYY PPLLAAYY H HO OU USS EE (Atlanta) Ross Mathews February 13 SSCCH H EERRM M EERRH HO O RRN N SS YYM M PPH HO ON NYY CC EEN NTT EE RR (Nashville) Steve Tyrell, Jamie Johnson, Shris Scruggs, The War and Treaty February 13 4400 W WAATT TT CC LLU U BB (Athens, GA) Drive-By Truckers February 13 GEEO G O RRG GIIAA TTH H EEAATT RREE (Athens, GA) Shovels & Rope February 13 SSO ON NG GBBIIRRD DSS SSO OU U TTH H (Chattanooga) Kentucky Headhunters, The Georgia Thunderbolts February 14 SSO ON NG GBBIIRRD DSS N NO O RRTT H H (Chattanooga) The Beaters January 14 WAAN W ND DEE RRLLIIN NG G BBRREEW WII N NG G CCO OM MPPAAN N YY (Chattanooga) 80s Prom February 14 TTH H EE CC O OM M EED D YY CCAATT CC H H (Chattanooga) Dale Jones February 14 JJ..JJ..’’SS BBO OH H EEM MIIAA (Chattanooga) Superbody, Bay Faction, Kindora February 14 SSCCH H EERRM M EERRH HO O RRN N SS YYM M PPH HO ON NYY CC EEN NTT EE RR (Nashville) Patti LaBelle February 14 LLEESSLLIIEE SS.. W WRRIIG GH HTT FF IIN NEE AARRTTSS CC EEN NTT EERR (Birmingham) Melissa Manchester February 14 WO W ORRK KPPLLAAYY TT H HEE AATTRREE (Birmingham) Drew & Ellie Holcomb February 14 IIRRO ON N CCIITT YY (Birmingham) Abbey Road Live February 14 SSTTA ATT EE FFAARRM M AARREE N NAA (Atlanta) Alan Jackson February 14 CCO O CCAA CCO O LLAA RRO OXXYY (Atlanta) Gilberto Santa Rosa February 14 TTH H EE LLO O FFTT (Atlanta) Poppy February 14 TTH H EE M M IILLLL && M M IIN NEE (Knoxville) Moon Taxi February 14 4400 W WAATT TT CC LLU U BB (Athens, GA) Drive-By Truckers February 14 SSO ON NG GBBIIRRD DSS N NO O RRTT H H (Chattanooga) Mike Farris February 15 SSO ON NG GBBIIRRD DSS SSO OU U TTH H (Chattanooga) Natti Love Joys February 15 WAAN W ND DEE RRLLIIN NG G BBRREEW WII N NG G CCO OM MPPAAN N YY (Chattanooga) Sleazy Sleazy, Holly Street Band February 15 TTH H EE CC O OM M EED D YY CCAATT CC H H (Chattanooga) Dale Jones February 15 JJ..JJ..’’SS BBO OH H EEM MIIAA (Chattanooga) The Shivas, The Pearloids, Trembles February 15
FEBRUARY 2020
21
RRYY M MAAN N AAU UD D IITTO O RRIIU UM M (Nashville) Tyler Childers February 15 TT H HEE BBAASSEEM M EEN N TT EEAASSTT (Nashville) Paul Cauthen February 15 CC O OCC AA CC O OLL AA RRO OXXYY (Atlanta) Dermot Kennedy February 15 VVA ARRIIEETT YY PPLLAAYY H HO OU USSEE (Atlanta) Michael Kiwanuka February 15 MU M USSIICC RRO OO OM M@ @ SSM MIITT H H ’’SS O OLLD D EE BBA ARR (Atlanta) Webb Wilder, Tom Gray February 15 TT H HEE TT AABBEERRN NAACC LLEE (Atlanta) Walows February 15 KN K NO OXXVVIILLLLEE CC IIVVIICC AAU UD DIITT O O RRIIU UM M (Knoxville) Michael Combs February 15 TT H HEE M MII LLLL && M MII N NEE (Knoxville) Moon Taxi February 15 4400 W WAATTTT CC LLU UBB (Athens, GA) Drive-By Truckers February 15 TT H HEE CC O OM M EED DYY CC AATT CCH H (Chattanooga) Dale Jones February 16 RRYY M MAAN N AAU UD D IITTO O RRIIU UM M (Nashville) Tyler Childers February 16 TT H HEE BBAASSEEM M EEN N TT EEAASSTT (Nashville) The 69 Eyes, Wednesday 13 February 16 MU M USSIICC RRO OO OM M@ @ SSM MIITT H H ’’SS O OLLD D EE BBA ARR (Atlanta) Jimbo Mathus’ Incinerator February 16 IIN N FFIIN N IITTEE EEN N EERRG G YY CCEE N NTT EERR (Duluth, GA) Ana Gabriel February 16 SSA ATT U URRN N (Birmingham) Summer Salt February 16 TT IIVVO OLLII TTH H EEAATT RREE (Chattanooga) Blue Man Group February 17 CC O OBBBB EE N NEE RRG GYY PPEERRFF O ORRM MIIN NG GA ARRTTSS CCEE N NTT EERR (Atlanta) Il Volo February 17 TT IIVVO OLLII TTH H EEAATT RREE (Chattanooga) Blue Man Group February 18 JJ EEM MIISS O ON N CCO ON NCC EERRTT H H AALLLL (Birmingham) The Chieftains February 18 IIRRO ON N CC IITT YY (Birmingham) Grace Potter February 18 SSA ATT U URRN N (Birmingham) We Were Promised Jetpacks February 18 ZZ YYD D EECC O O (Birmingham) Garza February 18 CC IITT YY W WIIN NEE RRYY N N AASSH H VVIILL LLEE (Nashville)
Donovan Frankenreiter, Christian Holmes February 18 GRRAAN G ND DO O LLEE O OPPRRYY H HO OU USSEE (Nashville) The Oak Ridge Boys February 18 VVA ARRIIEETT YY PPLLAAYY H HO OU USSEE (Atlanta) Chelsea Cutler, Alexander 23 February 18 CC O OBBBB EE N NEERRG G YY PPEERRFFO O RRM MIIN NG G AARRTT SS CC EEN N TT EERR (Atlanta) Gordon Lightfoot February 18 TT EERRM MII N NAALL W WEE SSTT (Atlanta) Jason Boland & The Stragglers February 18 TT H HEE CCO OM MEE D DYY CC AATTCC H H (Chattanooga) Michael Palascak February 19 JJ..JJ..’’ SS BBO OH HEEM M IIAA (Chattanooga) Open Mic Comedy February 19 TT EEN NN NEESS SSEEEE PPEERRFFO O RRM MIIN NG G AARRTT SS CC EE N NTT EERR (Nashville) The Chieftains February 19 BBRRIID DG G EESSTT O ON NEE AARREE N NAA (Nashville) The Lumineers, Mt. Joy February 19 RRYY M MAAN N AAU UD DIITT O O RRIIU UM M (Nashville) Grace Potter February 19 SSA ATT U URRN N (Birmingham) Lower Dens February 19 ZZYY D DEE CCO O (Birmingham) Drake Bell February 19 BBIIJJO OU U TT H HEE AATT RREE (Knoxville) Anderson East, Foy Vance February 19 TT EERRM MII N NAALL W WEE SSTT (Atlanta) Ana Popovic February 19 EED DD DIIEE ’’SS AATTTT IICC (Atlanta) Jerry Joseph February 19 CC O OBBBB EE N NEERRG G YY PPEERRFFO O RRM MIIN NG G AARRTT SS CC EEN N TT EERR (Atlanta) Blippi February 19 MAARRSS M M MU USSII CC H H AALLLL (Huntsville, AL) Tesla February 19 SSO ON NG G BBII RRD D SS N NO ORRTT H H (Chattanooga) Ana Popovic February 20 TT H HEE CCO OM MEE D DYY CC AATTCC H H (Chattanooga) Michael Palascak February 20 BBIIJJO OU U TT H HEE AATT RREE (Knoxville) Joseph, Deep Sea Diver February 20 SSIID D EETT RRAACCK KSS (Huntsville, AL) Shovels & Rope February 20 SSO ON NG G BBII RRD D SS N NO ORRTT H H (Chattanooga) Caitlin Canty February 21 SSO ON NG G BBII RRD D SS SSO OU UTT H H (Chattanooga) Electric Avenue February 21 WAAN W ND DEERRLLII N NG G BBRREE W WIIN NG G CC O OM M PPAAN NYY (Chattanooga) No Good Deeds, Left Hand Lucky, Rye Baby February 21 TT H HEE CCO OM MEE D DYY CC AATTCC H H (Chattanooga) Michael Palascak February 21 WAALLK W KEE RR TT H HEEAATT RREE (Chattanooga) Foy Vance and Anderson East February 21 LLEE G GAACC YY AARREE N NAA (Birmingham) Sturgill Simpson, Tyler Childers February 21 HAA RRRRAAH H H ’’SS CCH H EERRO OK KEEEE CC AASSIIN NO O (Cherokee,
NC) Bret Michaels, Warrant February 21 OPPEE N O N CC H HO O RRD DM MU USSIICC (Knoxville) David Wilcox February 21 KN K NO O XXVVIILLLLEE CCIIVVIICC A AU UD D IITT O ORRIIU UM M (Knoxville) Rodney Carrington February 21 VVA ARRII EETT YY PPLL A AYYH HO OU U SSEE (Atlanta) RJD2 February 21 MA M ARRSS M MU USSIICC H HA ALLLL (Huntsville, AL) Walk Off The Earth February 21 SSO ON NG GBBIIRRD D SS SSO OU UTT H H (Chattanooga) Who’s Bad February 22 SSO ON NG GBBIIRRD D SS N NO O RRTTH H (Chattanooga) Eric Gales February 22 WA W AN ND D EERRLLIIN NG G BBRREE W WIIN NG G CC O OM M PPA AN NYY (Chattanooga) Monday Night Social, Web Baringer February 22 TTRRIISS H H’’ SS (Chattanooga) Husky Burnette February 22 TTH H EE CCO OM MEED D YY CCA ATT CC H H (Chattanooga) Michael Palascak February 22 JJ..JJ..’’ SS BBO OH H EEM M IIA A (Chattanooga) Oweda, The Ides of June February 22 AN A ND D RREEW W JJ A ACCK KSS O ON NH HA ALLLL (Nashville) Rodney Carrington February 22 TTH H EE CC O OW WA AN N (Nashville) Guilty Pleasures February 22 TTEE N NN N EESSSSEE EE TT H H EEA ATT RREE (Knoxville) Kansas February 22 BBIIJJO OU U TT H HEE A ATTRREE (Knoxville) The Steeldrivers February 22 TTH HO OM M PPSSO ON N --BBO O LLIIN NG GA ARREEN NA A (Knoxville) Jason Aldean, Dee Jay Silver, Riley Green, Morgan Wallen February 22 TTH H EE LL O OFFTT (Atlanta) YBN Cordae February 22 TTEE RRM MIIN NA ALL W WEESS TT (Atlanta) Archers Of Loaf February 22 VVA ARRII EETT YY PPLL A AYYH HO OU U SSEE (Atlanta) Delbert McClinton February 22 EED DD DIIEE’’ SS A ATT TT IICC (Atlanta) Clay Cook February 22 TTH H EE CCO OM MEED D YY CCA ATT CC H H (Chattanooga) Michael Palascak February 23 RRYYM MA AN NA AU UD DIITT O ORRIIU UM M (Nashville) Dermot Kennedy February 23 D && LLII N 33RRD ND DSS LLEEYY (Nashville) Junior Brown February 23 VVA ARRII EETT YY PPLL A AYYH HO OU U SSEE (Atlanta) Blue Oyster Cult, UFO February 23 EED DD DIIEE’’ SS A ATT TT IICC (Atlanta) Francine Reed February 23 WA W ALLK KEE RR TTH H EEA ATT RREE (Chattanooga) Walk Off The World February 24 TTH H EE BBA ASS EEM MEE N NTT EEA ASS TT (Nashville) YBN Cordae February 24 AN A ND D RREEW W JJ A ACCK KSS O ON NH HA ALLLL (Nashville) Bon Iver, TU Dance February 25
ENIGMA
TTH H EE CC O OW WAAN N (Nashville) Soul Asylum, Local H February 25 KN K NO O XXVVIILL LLEE AAU UD DIITT O ORRIIU UM M && CCO O LLIISSEE U UM M (Knoxville) Sturgill Simpson, Tyler Childers February 25 SSA ATTU U RRN N (Birmingham) EarthGang February 25 MAARRSS M M MU USSIICC H HAALL LL (Huntsville, AL) Queensryche, Eve To Adam, John 5 February 25 SSO ON NG GBBIIRRD DSS SSO OU U TTH H (Chattanooga) The Motet February 26 TTH H EE CC O OM M EED D YY CCAATT CC H H (Chattanooga) Mutzie February 26 JJ..JJ..’’SS BBO OH H EEM MIIAA (Chattanooga) Open Mic Comedy February 26 AN A ND DRREE W W JJAACC K KSSO ON NH H AALLLL (Nashville) Bon Iver, TU Dance February 26 RRYY M MAA N N AAU UD D IITT O ORRIIU UM M (Nashville) Opeth February 26 BBU UCC K KH HEE AAD D TT H HEE AATTRREE (Atlanta) Queensryche February 26 CCO O BBBB EEN NEE RRG GYY PPEE RRFF O ORRM M IIN NG G AARRTT SS CC EEN NTT EERR (Atlanta) The Beach Boys February 26 TTH H EE TT AABBEERRN N AACCLLEE (Atlanta) Young Dolph, Key Glock February 26 TTH H EE N N IICCK K (Birmingham) Big Sandy & His Fly Rite Boys February 26 KN K NO O XXVVIILL LLEE AAU UD DIITT O ORRIIU UM M && CCO O LLIISSEE U UM M (Knoxville) Sturgill Simpson, Tyler Childers February 26 SSO ON NG GBBIIRRD DSS N NO O RRTT H H (Chattanooga) Doyle Bramhall II February 27 TTH H EE CC O OM M EED D YY CCAATT CC H H (Chattanooga) Mutzie February 27 TTH H EE SSIIG GN NAALL (Chattanooga) Sister Hazel February 27 TTIIVVO O LLII TT H HEE AATTRREE (Chattanooga) Michael Carbonaro February 27 RRYY M MAA N N AAU UD D IITT O ORRIIU UM M (Nashville) Tedeschi Trucks Band, The War and Treaty February 27 MAARRAATT H M HO ON NM MU USSIICC W WO O RRK KSS (Nashville) Black Tiger Sex Machine February 27 TTH H EE BBAASSEE M MEE N NTT EEAASSTT (Nashville) Crobot, Aeges February 27 TTH H EE CC O OW WAAN N (Nashville) The Wonder Years, Spanish Love Songs, Free Throw February 27 SSM MIITT H H’’ SS O O LLD DEE BBAARR (Atlanta) The Mother Hips February 27 CCO O CCAA CCO O LLAA RRO OXXYY (Atlanta) Trippie Redd February 27 SSO ON NG GBBIIRRD DSS SSO OU U TTH H (Chattanooga) The Steel Woods, Tennessee Jet February 28 WAAN W ND DEE RRLLIIN NG G BBRREEW WII N NG G CCO OM MPPAAN N YY (Chattanooga) Forever Bluegrass February 28 TTH H EE CC O OM M EED D YY CCAATT CC H H (Chattanooga) Mutzie February 28 JJ..JJ..’’SS BBO OH H EEM MIIAA (Chattanooga) Fault Lines, Pains Chapel, Terminal Overdrive February 28 SSCCH H EERRM M EERRH HO O RRN N SS YYM M PPH HO ON NYY CC EEN NTT EE RR (Nashville) Dee Dee Bridgewater, Bill Charlap February 28 RRYY M MAA N N AAU UD D IITT O ORRIIU UM M (Nashville) Tedeschi Trucks Band February 28 TTH H EE CC O OW WAAN N (Nashville) Elizabeth Cook, Cory Branan February 28 FFO OXX TT H H EEAATT RREE (Atlanta) Joe Bonamassa February 28 EED DD D IIEE’’ SS AATT TT IICC (Atlanta) Lily Rose February 28 TTH HO OM M PPSSO ON N --BBO OLLII N NG G AARREEN NAA (Knoxville) Lauren Daigle, Johnnyswim February 28
FEBRUARY 2020
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BBIIJJ O OU U TTH H EEAATT RREE (Knoxville) Drew & Ellie Holcomb February 28 SSO ON NG G BBIIRRD DSS N NO ORRTT H H (Chattanooga) Paul Thorn February 29 SSO ON NG G BBIIRRD DSS SS O OU UTT H H (Chattanooga) Tennessee’s Dead February 29 WAAN W ND DEE RRLLIIN NG G BBRREEW WIIN NG G CC O OM MPPA AN NYY (Chattanooga) Behold the Brave, Subkonsious February 29 TT H HEE CC O OM M EED DYY CC AATT CCH H (Chattanooga) Mutzie February 29 TT H HEE SSIIG GN NAALL (Chattanooga) Mustache The Band February 29 JJ ..JJ ..’’SS BBO OH HEE M MIIAA (Chattanooga) Teddy and the Rough Riders, Country Westerns February 29 TT IIVVO OLLII TTH H EEAATT RREE (Chattanooga) Kansas February 29 TT H HEE CC AAVVEE RRN NSS (Pelham, TN) Railroad Earth February 29 FF O OXX TT H HEE AATTRREE (Atlanta) Joe Bonamassa February 29 VVA ARRIIEETT YY PPLLAAYY H HO OU USSE (Atlanta) Ashley McBryde February 29 RRYY M MAAN N AAU UD D IITTO O RRIIU UM M (Nashville) Tedeschi Trucks Band February 29 TT H HEE BBAASSEEM M EEN N TT EEAASSTT (Nashville) Illiterate Light February 29 IIRRO ON N CC IITT YY (Birmingham) Black Tiger Sex Machine February 29 TT H HEE CC O OM M EED DYY CC AATT CCH H (Chattanooga) Mutzie March 1 FF O OXX TT H HEE AATTRREE (Atlanta) Diana Ross March 1 RRYY M MAAN N AAU UD D IITTO O RRIIU UM M (Nashville) Josh Gates March 1 WAARR M W MEEM MO ORRIIAALL AAU UD DIITT O O RRIIU UM M (Nashville) Trippie Redd March 2 RRYY M MAAN N AAU UD D IITTO O RRIIU UM M (Nashville) Collective Soul March 2 SSA ATT U URRN N (Birmingham) Avi Kaplan March 2 M EEM M MO O RRIIAALL AAU UD DIITT O ORRIIU UM M (Chattanooga) Joe Bonamassa March 3 IIN N FFIIN N IITTEE EEN N EERRG G YY CCEE N NTT EERR (Duluth, GA) Post Malone, Swae Lee March 3 RRYY M MAAN N AAU UD D IITTO O RRIIU UM M (Nashville) George Thorogood & The Destroyers March 3 SSO ON NG G BBIIRRD DSS SS O OU UTT H H (Chattanooga) Minnesota March 4 TT H HEE SSIIG GN NAALL (Chattanooga) Black Tiger Sex Machine March 4 BBRRIID DG GEESS TTO ON NEE AARREEN N AA (Nashville) Post Malone, Swae Lee March 4 TT H HEE LLYY RRIICC TTH H EEAATT RREE (Birmingham) George Winston March 4 TT H HEE CC O OM M EED DYY CC AATT CCH H (Chattanooga) Jason Cheny March 5 WAALLK W K EERR TT H HEE AATTRREE (Chattanooga) Big Bad Voodoo Daddy March 5 VVA ARRIIEETT YY PPLLAAYY H HO OU USSEE (Atlanta) Arlo Guthrie March 5 FF O OXX TT H HEE AATTRREE (Atlanta) Jacquees March 5 AIISSLL EE 55 (Atlanta) Trigger Hippy March 5 A CC IITT YY W WIIN NEE RRYY AA TTLLAAN N TTAA (Atlanta) Dar Williams March 5 TT H HO OM MPPSSO ON N-- BBO OLLIIN NG G AARREE N NA A (Knoxville) Zac Brown Band, Amos Lee, Pop Bear March 5 TT EEN NN NEE SSSSEEEE TT H HEE AATTRREE (Knoxville) Indigo Girls March 5 SSA ATT U URRN N (Birmingham) Lucero March 5 SSO ON NG G BBIIRRD DSS N NO ORRTT H H (Chattanooga) Dar Williams, Heather Maloney March 6 SSO ON NG G BBIIRRD DSS SS O OU UTT H H (Chattanooga) Rubiks Groove March 6 TT H HEE CC O OM M EED DYY CC AATT CCH H (Chattanooga) Jason Cheny March 6 TT H HEE SSIIG GN NAALL (Chattanooga) Eli Young Band
March 6 WAALLK W KEE RR TT H HEEAATT RREE (Chattanooga) Stassi Schroeder March 6 BBRRIID DG G EESSTT O ON NEE AARREE N NAA (Nashville) Dan + Shay March 6 MEE RRCCYY LLO M OU UN NG GEE (Nashville) Wire March 6 RRYY M MAAN N AAU UD DIITT O O RRIIU UM M (Nashville) Ruston Kelly March 6 TT EEN NN NEESS SSEEEE TTH H EEAATT RREE (Knoxville) Bob Weir And Wolf Bros. March 6 VVA ARRIIEETT YY PPLLAAYY H HO OU USSEE (Atlanta) Trixie Mattel March 6 TT EERRM MII N NAALL W WEE SSTT (Atlanta) Lucero March 6 SSTT A ATT EE FFAARRM M AARREEN N AA (Atlanta) “Nick Cannon Presents ‘Wild ‘N Out Live’” March 6 TT H HEE TTAABBEE RRN NAACC LLEE (Atlanta) Randy Rainbow March 6 TT H HEE LLYY RRIICC TT H H EEAATT RREE (Birmingham) Wynonna Judd March 6 IIRRO ON N CC IITT YY (Birmingham) Frank Foster March 6 DRRU D U IID D CC IITT YY M MU USS IICC H HAALLLL (Tuscaloosa, AL) Dylan Scott March 6 SSO ON NG G BBII RRD D SS N NO ORRTT H H (Chattanooga) The Doyle and Debbie Show March 7 TT H HEE CCO OM MEE D DYY CC AATTCC H H (Chattanooga) Jason Cheny March 7 WAALLK W KEE RR TT H HEEAATT RREE (Chattanooga) Jim Breuer March 7 TT H HEE CCAAVVEE RRN N SS (Pelham, TN) Arlo Guthrie March 7 FFO O XX TT H HEE AATTRREE (Atlanta) Little Big Town March 7 BBU UCC K KH HEE AAD D TT H H EEAATT RREE (Atlanta) Big Head Todd and The Monsters March 7 VVA ARRIIEETT YY PPLLAAYY H HO OU USSEE (Atlanta) Wire March 7
TTEE RRM MIIN NA ALL W WEESS TT (Atlanta) Lucero March 7 VVA ARRII EETT YY PPLL A AYYH HO OU U SSEE (Atlanta) Wire March 7 FFO O XX TTH H EEA ATT RREE (Atlanta) Little Big Town March 7 SSTT A ATTEE FFA ARRM MA ARREEN NA A (Atlanta) Martin Lawrence March 7 EED DD DIIEE’’ SS A ATT TT IICC (Atlanta) Rebecca Loebe March 7 IIN NFF IIN NIITT EE EEN NEE RRG GYY CC EEN N TTEE RR (Duluth, GA) Sturgill Simpson, Tyler Childers March 7 TTH H EE LLYYRRIICC TT H HEE A ATT RREE (Birmingham) Tommy Emmsnurl March 7 RRYYM MA AN NA AU UD DIITT O ORRIIU UM M (Nashville) Bob Weir And Wolf Bros. March 7 TTH H EE BBA ASS EEM MEE N NTT EEA ASS TT (Nashville) Archers Of Loaf March 7 TTH H EE CCO OM MEED D YY CCA ATT CC H H (Chattanooga) Jason Cheny March 8 SSCC H HEERRM M EERRH HO ORRN N SSYY M MPPH HO ON NYY CC EEN N TTEE RR (Nashville) Ruben Studdard March 8 TTH H EE CC O OW WA AN N (Nashville) Fit For A King, Chelsea Grin, Alpha Wolf, Crystal Lake March 8 VVA ARRII EETT YY PPLL A AYYH HO OU U SSEE (Atlanta) Blood Orange, Tei Shi March 9 KN K NO O XXVVIILLLLEE CCIIVVIICC A AU UD D IITT O ORRIIU UM M (Knoxville) Louis C.K. March 9 BBEELLCC O OU U RRTT TT H H EEA ATT RREE (Nashville) Guster March 10 VVA ARRII EETT YY PPLL A AYYH HO OU U SSEE (Atlanta) Blood Orange, Tei Shi March 10 RRYYM MA AN NA AU UD DIITT O ORRIIU UM M (Nashville) Scotty McCreery March 11 TTH H EE BBA ASS EEM MEE N NTT EEA ASS TT (Atlanta) Damon Johnson March 11 TTH H EE LLYYRRIICC TT H HEE A ATT RREE (Birmingham) Marc
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Broussard March 11 TTH H EE CC O OM M EED D YY CCAATT CC H H (Chattanooga) Erik Griffin March 12 WAALLK W KEERR TT H H EEAATT RREE (Chattanooga) Marc Broussard March 12 TTH H EE CC O OW WAAN N (Nashville) Geoff Tate March 12 CCA AN NN NEERRYY BBAALLLLRRO OO OM M (Nashville) Devin Townsend, Haken, The Contortionist March 12 TTEE N NN NEE SSSSEE EE TT H HEE AATTRREE (Knoxville) Tommy Emmanuel, Sierra Hull March 12 BBU U CCK KH H EEAAD D TT H HEE AATTRREE (Atlanta) Silversun Pickups March 12 TTH H EE TT AABBEERRN N AACCLLEE (Atlanta) Paul Reubens March 12 VVA ARRIIEE TTYY PPLLAAYY H HO OU USS EE (Atlanta) Marty Stuart March 12 SSO ON NG GBBIIRRD DSS N NO O RRTT H H (Chattanooga) Callista Clark March 13 SSO ON NG GBBIIRRD DSS SSO OU U TTH H (Chattanooga) Larry Fleet March 13 TTH H EE SSIIG GN NAALL (Chattanooga) Whiskey Tabernacle March 13 TTH H EE CC O OM M EED D YY CCAATT CC H H (Chattanooga) Erik Griffin March 13 TTIIVVO O LLII TT H HEE AATTRREE (Chattanooga) Harry Connick Jr. March 13 WAALLK W KEERR TT H H EEAATT RREE (Nashville) Yonder Mountain String Band March 13 TTH H EE TT AABBEERRN N AACCLLEE (Atlanta) Coin March 13 SSTTA ATT EE FFAARRM M AARREE N NAA (Atlanta) Erykah Badu, Common March 13 EED DD D IIEE’’ SS AATT TT IICC (Atlanta) Sean Hayes March 13 BBIIJJ O OU U TTH H EEAATT RREE (Knoxville) Marc Broussard March 13
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TT EEN NN NEE SSSSSSEEEE TT H HEE AATTRREE (Knoxville) Amy Grant March 13 TT H HEE M MII LLLL && M MII N NEE (Knoxville) Silversun Pickups March 13 IIRRO ON N CC IITT YY (Birmingham) Jackson Capps March 13 WO W O RRK KPPLLAAYY TT H HEEAATT RREE (Birmingham) Damon Johnson March 13 M AARRSS M M MU U SSIICC H HAALLLL (Huntsville, AL) The Molly Ringwalds March 13 SSO ON NG G BBIIRRD DSS N NO ORRTT H H (Chattanooga) Arielle March 14 TT H HEE CC O OM M EED DYY CC AATT CCH H (Chattanooga) Erik Griffin March 14 AN A ND DRREEW W JJAACC K KSSO ON NH H AALLLL (Nashville) Ron White March 14 RRYY M MAAN N AAU UD D IITTO O RRIIU UM M (Nashville) Coin March 14 TT EEN NN NEE SSSSEEEE TT H HEE AATTRREE (Knoxville) America March 14 CC O OCC AA CC O OLL AA RRO OXXYY (Atlanta) Hippie Sabotage, ilo ilo March 14 CC O OBBBB EE N NEE RRG GYY PPEERRFF O ORRM MIIN NG GA ARRTTSS CCEE N NTT EERR (Atlanta) George Lopez March 14 TT EERRM M IIN NAALL W W EESSTT (Atlanta) Here Come the Mummies March 14 SSA ATT U URRN N (Birmingham) Geoff Tate March 14 SSCC H H EERRM MEE RRH HO O RRN N SSYY M MPPH HO ON N YY CCEE N NTT EERR (Nashville) Jonny Lang March 15 TT EERRM M IIN NAALL W W EESSTT (Atlanta) Radical Face March 15 SSTT A ATT EE FF AARRM M AARREE N NAA (Atlanta) André Rieu March 15 AIISSLL EE 55 (Atlanta) Mija March 15 A CC IITT YY W WIIN NEE RRYY N N AASSH H VVIILL LLEE (Nashville) Kasim Sulton March 16
Say It Ain’t So I was a little surprised the other day when that home of that “fresh, square steamed bun” filed for reorganization. Yes, the beloved (at least in the South) Krystal has filed Chapter 11 bankruptcy. Judging by the reaction on social media and elsewhere it is obvious that our educational system has failed us. I have read a lot of posts crying over the fact that Krystal was going out of business. Suck it up kids – they’re not. If Krystal was going out of business they would file a Chapter 7 bankruptcy, which is liquidating everything. It’s a surprise in an area with an inordinate amount of bankruptcy filings that even the most simplistic bumpkin doesn’t know their bankruptcy terms. There is a good chance that one of you reading this has filed at some
point in your life. That being said, it is still very sad. I’m sure some Chattanooga purists blame the new owners in Atlanta. This is the second such filing for he little burger join that got its start at the corner of 7th and Cherry Streets during the heart of the Depression (1932, for you people keeping score at home). The first was in the mid ‘90s.
Some of my best times as a little boy involved going to Krystal. I remember after church being taken there with my best friend’s family. One of my best childhood memories was “boy’s night out” with my
to Krystal – and I’ll explain later.
dad. My dad would have me put on my best “Swinging ‘60s/’70s clothes and we would go off the mountain to the Krystal on South Broad. We would then eat, drive back up the mountain and I would watch “This Is Tom Jones” and I would try to sing along dressed as if I was Jones with my bellbottom Kings Road double knit trousers that my mom picked out at Sears or JC Penney (in the “husky section”). My guy time with my dad is still to this day my favorite memories of anything I have ever done. An Saturday afternoons when I was out with my dad that was our go-to spot since it was close to home.
treat and not meant to be a lifestyle choice. Changing dietary habits of core customers and a younger generation that is more conscious to what they eat has caused the fast food industry and the fining industry as a whole to reexamine the way they do business.
The fast food market has found itself oversaturated with a variety of choices over the past 25 years. Like I said, it was a novelty or a
I’ve had a love-hate relationship with Krystal my whole life since moving here from up north many years ago. It’s more love than hate. A lot of the hate was feigned. Krystal was like a parent to a teenager. We hate to admit it to our friends that we love it so we pretend we don’t, yet always in a pinch or need something to eat it is always there for us.
Back then going to Krystal or “The Krystal” as a lot of you call it wasn’t a daily thing. It was a treat. That’s hard to believe seeing we live in an era that has multiple fast food chains on every corner. That’s kind of what has happened ENIGMA
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Kids – now adults that grew up eating at Krystal or any other fast food change for that matter can no longer wolf down a bag of those small square burgers and wash them down with a shake or ice cold Coca Cola. The Boomer generation was become the diabetes generation as well as being the Geritol crowd. It’s a proven fact our bodies can no longer eat the way they did when they were younger. It’s a sad but very true fact. And while Krystal continues to wrest itself of the virtues of who they are – or once were, Americans no longer
are. There is no sure cure for what ails Krystal but like with every business one must adapt to the times and realize it’s no longer business as usual. As I said earlier I have always had a love/hate relationship with Krystal. It is my guilty pleasure. Despite thinking of myself as a sophisticated gourmet with certain diet restrictions as I grow older, every time I drive past Krystal I have to fight the urge to pull into the parking lot. It’s a little easier these days to resist. During my prime time Krystal was open 24 hours, even during the holidays. With the exception of Waffle House it was the only restaurant open 24 hours – and the only one with a drive-thru. No longer. Some have drive thrus that are open late – not 24 hours and they now close the dining room by nine or 10pm at the latest. A Chattanoogan’s relationship with Krystal easily correlates with their age. As kids every boy and girl loved Krystal. The burgers are kid sized and to a pint size human that’s awesome. Before “kid’s” and “Happy” meals there were the Krystal Kritters – a group of “animals” that were mascots for the franchise. McDonald’s may have had Ronald McDonald, but Krystal had their Kritters that got into misadventures in the TV commercials and kids could even get stickers of the critters a lot of times. The Kritters were like the chain’s version of Sesame Street characters – or H.R. Pufnstuf. Krystal in the olden days used to have a lot of giveaways as I remember as a kid. I remember heart shaped stickers with a smile on them give away during Valentine’s season for example. As a kid going to the Krystal was a treat. After a football or basketball game depending on whose parent was driving us home after the game we would either stop at Golden Gallon for a small Icee or if we were really good or played exceptionally well we would be taken to Krystal for a few burgers, fries and a drink. Sometimes after church parents might take us all out to eat at Krystal because it was easy to get seated and generally cheaper to feed a bunch of kids there than Shoney’s or anywhere else – and I
knew of no kid that didn’t like hamburgers back in the day, or for that matter this day. As you got older and into junior high and high school you tastes got a little bit more sophisticated. Burgers for the most part were still king but now there were more choices as well as pizza and tacos to choose from. If you went to Krystal too often you were considered cheap – and no high schooler wanted to be considered cheap or poor – even if you were. We still ate at Krystal often – especially on school trips because it was your basic burgers and fries and since the small burgers were so inexpensive anyone could afford it – even poor kids like me. When you got into college or post high school you went through denial. We started referring to Krystals as “gut bombs”. We swore up and down the only time we were there were after a party or when we were drunk. Often the drive-thru at Krystal between 3 and 4am was quite the spectacle and a who’s who of frat boys, sorority girls, night clubbers and other creatures of the night. Getting a to go order was nicknamed “gag a bag”. We would always talk about how nasty or “gross” Krystal’s burgers were, yet in the next breath we were scarfing down those small square burgers on the steamed bun. I’m sure the Krystal at 7th and Cherry Streets had a love/hate relationship with Yesterday’s. After the popular club on Patten Parkway cleared out the dining room was packed with bar patrons in various states of inebriation doing only God knows what. I witnessed food fights, saltshakers being thrown across the room and even the little mat at the entrance stolen. Not long after Yesterday’s shut down in February of 1998, that particular Krystal saw sales dive and it eventually went out of business. As a young adult when you start your first job fast food was the way most ate. What was once a treat had all of a sudden become a dining lifestyle. Still to this day at noon at just about every fat food chain in every town there is a long line at the drive thru. When you don’t have time to go to a sit-down restaurant or don’t want to spend ENIGMA
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the money you would go to Krystal or any other place with a drive thru, often eating your lunch in the car on the way back to work.
niche place to eat. With the latter you may lose some customers, but with menu limited to what you do best, you retain that cult status and become a go-to place or a “guilty pleasure” or diversion. By doing so you should be able to make your prices more reasonable since by limiting your menu you are eliminating unneeded overhead and supplies and theoretically do what you do best
As you got older you started to fall in love with Krystal all over again. Because our digestion was no longer as it once was, the visits became fewer, but we enjoyed going there because once again it was a treat – or as some put it – cheating on our newly restricted diet – be it doctor ordered or To succeed this way you have to lifestyle dictated. market yourself. When was the As people’s tastes changed unlike other fast food places, Krystal didn’t know how to adapt. Originally appealing because of it’s low price, breakfast for example is hard to sell at a cheap price without serving a completely garbage product. And if you really want a good breakfast are you going to go to a burger joint? I doubt it unless you are looking for something on the run. Even the “breakfast Krystal” or “Sunriser” is high priced for the size. Price point is another thing that has been killing Krystal. After the recession of 2008/9 you saw were every restaurant – not just fast food places drastically drop their prices or offer steep specials or menus. McDonald’s, Burger King, Wendy’s, Taco Bell all have “Dollar Menu” items. You can get a burger at these places for a dollar or just over that price point and combo meals for $5 or under. Krystal’s flagship small, square burger priced at 79¢ is just over an ounce and a quarter of beef were the traditional McDonald’s burger is just north of two ounces – almost double in size for only a quarter more. Add to that small fries and large drink are dollar menu items. Krystal, once know for being the least expensive fast food joints is actually one of the more expensive ones. And with changing tastes you have to do two things to stay abreast with these changes. You have to adjust to the to the changes in eating habits or you become a
last Krystal campaign you can remember? Yeah, me neither, I occasionally see coupons that come in the Sunday paper, but compared to the deals at the other chains they literally fall flat. That being said Krystal is not known for their great advertising campaigns over the years. The Krystal Kritters were cool. It was a different era in America and the Kritters appealed to children. Children are the reason people came to Krystal. And maybe Krystal needs to rethink that and instead of being a dining restaurant remind everyone that a Krystal is an actual treat, unlike other burger joints. I remember “Cowboy Sid and Sheila The Wonder Horse” ad campaign. It was quirky and weird. Cowboy Sid was a cowboy like in one of those western serial of the old say and Sheila The Wonder Horse was a stick horse – something a lot of kids had back in the ‘50s and ‘60s. The commercials were quirky to say the least, but did develop a cult following. Then there was the “Bob” the head with no body with the catchphrase “Head to Krystal”. The really odd campaign lasted only three years and must have ENIGMA
been developed after either sleep depravation or a lot of drugs and alcohol consumption. It developed a cult following on college campuses because of its quirky nature that appealed college kids who watched “Night Flight” and David Letterman. At the turn of the century Krystal joined the competitive eating craze that swept the nation. Joey Chestnut, who won the Nathan’s hot dog eating championship in 2007, still holding the record, holds the record for consuming the most Krystals at 103. With the world championship being hosted in Chattanooga the franchise sponsored local eating competitions usually featuring local media personalities. The competitive eating fad lasted for Krystal from 2004 to 2009. Since that time there has not been a credible or memorable marketing campaign outside of coupons. Unlike its competition in the fast food world Krystal has little social media presence and no cyber presence. There are no phone apps for Krystal unlike everyone from McDonald’s, Wendy’s, Subway, KFC – you get the picture. What was the last commercial you remember seeing or hearing for Krystal? Exactly. I am hoping this reorganization for Krystal is just a hiccup and not something terminal. I feel as if I have a lot invested – money, experiences and calories. I would hate to think Krystal would go the way of Godfather’s, Central Park or even Po’ Folks. The powers that be need to look to their history and consider revisiting their old glory. I’m not saying bring back the Kritters, since children today are much more sophisticated than even their parents and their parents before them. I would hate to think of a world without Krystal. Of course that would mean I’d have to road trip to Murfreesboro or Nashville for the next best thing White Castle (sacrilegious, I know).
- Wm. Alexander
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1. Robin Grant & The Standard 2. The Highwaywomen 3. Beck 4. G. Love (w/ Keb’ Mo’) 5. The Avett Brothers 6. Pixies 7. New Pornographers 8. Drive-By Truckers 9. Alanis Morissette 10. Drew Holcomb & The Neighbors 11. Noah Cyrus (w/ Leon Bridges) 12. Coldplay 13. Wilco 14. Grace Potter 15. Billie Eilish 16. Molly Tuttle 17. Jenny Lewis 18. Ozzy Osbourne 19. Monday Night Social 20. Maggie Rogers
ADVENTURE PICKS 1. Soul Asylum 2. Nathaniel Ratcliff 3. Of Montreal
Like Machines Distorted guitar, thick bass, powerful drums, and wild howls always cut right through the noise of the world. Like Machines plug into a timeless groove, while transmitting a modern message. The Atlanta, GA trio - Andrew Evans [vocals, guitar], Tanner Hendon [bass], and Cheney Brannon [drums]—double down on rip-roaring riffs, reckless snarls, and hard-hitting hooks as they
sort of happened organically. We were both playing with other people and just one day started jamming on some stuff that was a different genre than the band he was in. Thus, Like Machines was born.
simultaneously serve up understated and unassuming 21st century social commentary. Their narration smacks just as sharply as the sound does. Fresh off a couple of hometown dates with fellow Atlanta heroes, Collective Soul we got to talk briefly about what’s going on with the band.
iinn tthhee bbaanndd??
YY oouu aanndd AAnnddrreew w [[ EEvvaannss ]] ggrr eew w uupp ttooggeetthheerr .. DD iidd yyoouu gguuyyss tthhiinnkk w whhee nn yyoouu w wee rree llii ttttllee kkii ddss tthh iinnkk aabboouu tt ss ttaa rrttii nngg aa bbaanndd?? HH oow w ddiidd yyoouu rr iinnttee rree sstt iinn m muuss iicc ccoom mee aabboouutt?? No. We’ve known each other since a young, young age. I’m not exactly sure what age – first grade or something like that. We went to the same school. I’m a little bit older than him. He was in my brother’s grade, so he was more buddies with my brother. We didn’t start playing together until about four years ago or something. Even then there was never a “let’s start a band” conversation. It just
YYoouu ppll aayy bbaass ss ii nn tthhee bbaa nndd,, bbuutt yyoouu aall ssoo ppll aayy ddrr uum mss aa nndd ootthheerr ii nnssttrr uu-meennttss aass w m weell ll.. HH oow w ddii dd iitt ccoom mee aabboouutt tthhaa tt yyoouu cchhoossee ttoo ppllaayy bbaass ss
That’s right. It’s crazy man. In every other band I ever played in I played drums. All the people that know me always think I’m the drummer in this band. Basically, there already was a drummer in this band, so it was a two-piece at this time. It was just Andrew and the other drummer. I said, “Hey, it would sound a whole lot cooler with bass. You guys want me to hop on bass?” They said absolutely. It was a sort of get in where you fit in kind of thing, really. It’s been a lot of fun because I get to run around on stage, not locked behind a drum kit. It’s been a great learning experience for me and I’m really enjoying it.
YYoouu’’rree kkii nndd ooff tthhee ccllee aann--ccuutt gguuyy iinn tthhee bbaanndd.. TThhee ootthheerr gguuyyss hhaa vvee ssee rrii oouuss hhaaiirr ggooiinngg oonn.. IItt’’ss kkii nndd ooff llii kkee ZZZZ TToopp w w iitthh tthh ee oonnll yy gguu yy ii nn tthh ee bbaa nndd w wii tthhoouu tt aa bbeeaa rrdd ii ss nnaam meedd FFrraa nnkk BBeeaarr dd.. ENIGMA
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Yeah, they don’t even shower SSeeeeii nngg yyoouu hhaa vvee tthh ee ssttuu ddii oo ddoo yyoouu whhee nn ppllaa yyiinngg llii vvee ttoo either. It’s kind of rough some- ffiinndd ii tt hh aarrdd w bbaa llaa nnccee tthhee rrii gghh tt aanndd lleefftt ss iiddee ooff times. yyoouurr bbrr aaii nn aa nndd nnoott ttoo ttrr yy aanndd oovvee rr (( llaauugghhss)) II ccaann iim maaggii nnee.. aannaall yyzzee ee vveerr yytthhiinngg aanndd bbee oovv eerr llyy ccrrii ttii ccaall ?? I’m just kidding. I’m definitely the odd man out on the hair. It’s a lit- I’m sure I do and don’t realize it tle intimidating. I can’t do it like sometimes. For the most part I do that.
II uunnddeerr ssttaa nndd yy oouu hhaavvee aa rr eeccoorrddii nngg ssttuuddiioo.. I do.
D oo yyoouu gguuyyss rr eeccoorrdd aatt yyoouurr ss ttuuddii oo?? D We do. W hhaa tt iiss iitt ll iikk ee ggooiinngg ffrr oom W m tthhee pprr oo-dduuccee rr hhaatt ttoo tthhee aarr ttii ss tt hhaatt?? It’s a lot of fun. It’s also very difficult. I think it’s been a successful process thus far. That being said, in about 15 minutes I am going to pick up a very well-known producer named Bob Marlette you may have heard of. He’s worked with Seether, Black Sabbath, Saliva, Tracy Chapman. He’s a badass and we’re about to get in the studio and work with him for the next week. Obviously he’s great. As me being the producer and in the band sometimes it’s hard to see the forest for the trees. It’s a lot of roles. I’m definitely looking forward to him taking the reigns and having an outside objective ear. We’re psyched about it.
©Dave Weinthal
a fairly good job of it. Like; this is the writing process. It doesn’t matter how it sounds – just be creative. Then you get into the technical side. That’s when you have to be nit-picky and do that. I think I do a pretty good job of separating. Really all the guys in the band are like that. Cheney [Brannon], the drummer, he used to own a studio; Andrew has been in the studio obviously a million times. I think any musician who spends time in
the studio even if they’re not an easier to capture that live and do it engineer they get that sort of habit in a creative way. Really, we just told the guy, Jonathan Sterns, who or mindset. created and directed it – we just YYoouu gguuyyss aarree nnaam meedd LLiikk ee M Maacchh iinneess told him to read the lyrics and gave aanndd II uunnddeerr ssttaa nndd tthhee nnaam mee ccaa m mee him a little bit of an idea. But he ffrr oom m oonnee ooff yyoouurr ssoonnggss .. II w waass sort of ran with it and killed it. woonnddee rrii nngg w w whh eerr ee tthh ee oorrii ggiinn oonn With “Destitute” again talking tthhaatt ccaam mee?? IItt ssoouu nnddss ll iikk ee ssoom mee-- about no matter what walk of life tthhii nngg ffrr oom m llii tteerr aattuurr ee.. someone comes from they can still be destitute. They can have a lot of I wish it was that in-depth and like, money and still be destitute in profound. (laughs) It was a song their heart, in their soul, in their that we had for maybe over a year minds. Just be kind to others is the or so – I’m not exactly sure when general thing. We love making we wrote it. It’s been a while. videos. Like you said, it sort of When we decided to change the became a little part of our identity name, I always said coming up with thus far. We have another one a good band name was one of the we’re going to release soon, which hardest parts of being in a band. is definitely not as serious as these It’s not an easy task. We were flip- other ones – that’s all I’m going to ping through names; that one got tell you. It’s weird, it’s fun and I thrown out as a name. It just sort think you’re going to like it. of fit. It felt right. I think because w oo ss oonnggss aa nndd vvii ddeeooss aa rree it was already a song of ours, it TT hh ooss ee ttw D oo yyoouu ffiinndd didn’t feel like some crazy depar- vvee rryy ssee rrii oouu ss iinn nnaa ttuurr ee.. D w aayy w wii tthh tthh ee m maajj oorrii ttyy ture from what we were doing tthh aatt iitt’’ss tthhaa tt w already. We already felt like we ooff yy oouu rr llyyrr iiccss aa nndd ssoonnggss oorr aa rree woo ee xxaam mppllee ss ooff w w hhee rree were part of it. Basically the song tthh oossee jj uu sstt ttw wii tthh yyoouu rr m muu ssii cc?? is about having sex and paying for yyoouu gguuyyss ggoo w sex – but that’s no necessarily the interpretation we take from the I would say, sort of this era of us band name. We kind of take a lit- things have definitely been more tle more “wholesome” approach, if serious, but that’s not necessarily you will. (both laugh) Family- on purpose. It just sort of hapfriendly – we kind of view it as pened that way. That’s not to say humans we always push ourselves. that every song we’ll ever have will We’re more like machines. We be super deep and serious. I think don’t sleep, give ourself Fire Hour they’ll always have some sort of Energy shots, drink coffee all the meaning, but it just sort of haptime, do drugs – our bodies are pened that way, to be honest. machines, basically. On the flipside we see a lot of AI machines in YY oouu gguu yyss aarree ccllaa ssss iiffii eedd aass hh aarr dd general that we try to make rr oocckk.. H Hoow w ddii dd yyoouu gguu yyss eevv ooll vvee iinnttoo humanlike. It’s an interesting yyoouu rr ss oouu nndd?? dichotomy and contrast that we see. It’s an interesting concept; Andrew, the singer, he started writthat’s why our logo has the gear ing the style a number of years with the eyeball in the middle. It back. He started writing songs in was cool how it happened that this style and I think the more the band plays together, the more it way. develops and evolves. Like I said, YYoouurr m muuss iicc vvii ddee ooss hh aavvee ggaarr nneerr eedd aa lloott ooff bbuuzz zz –– ““ KKaaii ss eerr ”” aanndd ““DDee ssttii ttuuttee ””.. W W hh eenn II w waass w w aattcchh iinngg ““KKaaii ssee rr”” II w waa ss tthh ii nnkk ii nngg PPiinnkk FFll ooyydd’’ss moovvii ee,, ““ TThh ee W m Waa llll ””.. TT hh ee m muu ssii cc vviiddeeoo ss eeee m mss vvee rryy ii nntteennss ee aa nndd ddee eepp.. With the videos – especially “Kaiser” and Destitute” we definitely went with the concept of the song. With “Kaiser” it’s about war and we weren’t going to do some $20 million “Saving Private Ryan Pt. II” war shoot live action, so we decided to go the animated route and I thought it would be a little bit
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PUZZLE ANSWERS
this being the first band I ever played bass in I’m learning new things about my instrument and what to do with it – especially it being a three-piece we don’t have that extra rhythm guitar player to fill in the space at some times or whatever. I think it’s sort of evolving. I think you might hear something a bit different in the next batch of songs – maybe a little less heavy. I don’t know. We’ll see what happens.
ooff bbeeii nngg ii nn tthh ee ss ttuuddii oo?? Really both, man. When we go on the road for a while it’s really fun. I get into it. You get into the rhythm of it and then after a while you get sick of it and you’re ready
mals, but I enjoy them both very much. Playing shows is definitely high energy and instant gratification, where I would say working in the studio a long-term sort of grind and search for your sound.
©Dave Weinthal
BBaall aanncciinngg bbeeii nngg aa llii vvee ppeerr ffoorr m meerr aanndd w w oorr kkii nngg ii nn tthhee ss ttuuddiioo,, ddoo yyoouu ffiinndd yyoouurr ssee llff bbee iinngg aa ppee rrffeeccttii oonniiss tt?? Maybe it’s called a perfectionist, but I would just say I have high standards – just speaking me, personally. I definitely like to show up whatever it is – meeting, a show, recording session as prepared as possible and kill it. If it’s not perfect-perfect, I think I can live with that most of the time, but as long as I’m prepared for it and give it my all then that’s what makes me satisfied.
was called Southern Tracks and Brendan O’Brien used to work there all the time and we got the board from that studio, which was very, very cool because it was something that all of us grew up listening to a ton of Brendan O’Brien records. He did all those huge records that he produced especially in the ‘90s like Stone Temple Pilots, Pearl Jam, Bruce Springsteen, Train, Incubus – the list goes on. It’s Brendan O’Brien. Mastodon – so it’s very special for us to be able to work on it and we also feel very obligated to take care of it – keep its legend going, if you will.
YY oouu gguuyyss aarr ee bbaass eedd oouutt ooff AA ttll aannttaa.. HH oow w hhaa vvee yyoouu ss eeee nn AAttll aannttaa aass aa muu ssii cc ccoom m mm muunnii ttyy ffoorr yyoouu gguuyyss??
It’s a great music community. It’s very diverse in genres, but there are a ton of venues to play and difto go back into the studio. Then II uunnddeerr ssttaa nndd tthhee bbooaarrdd iinn yy oouu rr ssttuu -- ferent pockets of the city you can you’re in the studio for a while, ddii oo hh aass ssoorrtt ooff aa hhii ssttoorr yy ttoo ii tt.. II tt always try out to find out your litO ’’BBrr iiee nn.. tle niche, so it’s great. you’re making new sounds – new uuss eedd ttoo bbee lloonngg ttoo BBrreennddaann O records obviously, but then you’re ready to get out of the fortress and Yeah. I got the studio in 2011 and - Dave Weinthal D oo yyoouu ll iikk ee ppee rrffoorrm D mii nngg llii vvee oorr ddoo go show it to the world and rock it about that same time another stuyyoouu pprree ffeerr tthh ee pprrii ssttiinnee aa ttm mooss pphhee rree live. They’re just two different ani- dio in Atlanta closed down that
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THIS MONTH IN ROCK HISTORY
1950. Cole continued his hit streak with “Unforgettable” (#12 in 1951), “A Blossom Fell” (#2 in 1955), “Send For Me” (#6 in 1957), “Looking Back” (#5 in 1958), “Ramblin’ Rose” (#2 in 1962) and “Those Lazy-Hazy-Crazy Days of Summer” (#6 in 1963). He hit the charts again in 1991 when his voice was dubbed into a duet with Natalie on an updated version of “Unforgettable” which rose to #14.
1199 5577 Buddy Holly And The Crickets begin recording “That’ll Be The Day” with producer Norman Petty at his studio in Clovis, New Mexico. Holly had recorded the song with his band The Three Tunes in Nashville in 1956, but Decca Records brass didn’t like the result and refused to release it. Holly’s new version would become his signature tune, rising to #1 in both the US and the UK.
11 9966 77 The Turtles release their biggest hit, “Happy Together”, which will reach #1 in the US and #12 in the UK. Co-written by Garry Bonner and 11 9966 44 Alan Gordon, the song had been Beatlemania comes to America rejected by several other performwhen “I Want To Hold Your Hand” ers. becomes the first of twenty Billboard number one hits for The 1199 6688 Beatles. It would stay on top for Pink Floyd members fired Syd seven weeks, with world wide sales Barrett from the band and permaof fifteen million copies. nently replaced him with David Gilmour. Roger Waters later wrote Matthew Walsh, the Governor of and dedicated the song “Shine On Indiana declares the song “Louie You Crazy Diamond” to the increasLouie” by the Kingsmen (which was ingly unstable Barrett, who currently #6 on the Hot 100) to be checked into a psychiatric hospital pornographic. He asks the Indiana before going into seclusion. Broadcasters Association to ban the record, although stations claim 25-year-old Frankie Lymon, lead it’s impossible to accurately figure singer of The Teenagers, died of a out the lyrics from “the unintelligi- heroin overdose in his grandmothble rendition as performed by the er’s New York home. Lymon was on Kingsmen.” Although much has leave from a Georgia Army post at been written about the controver- the time and was scheduled to sy, Indiana was the only state to record for Roulette Records the actually ban the record from radio next day. He first hit the national play.
11 99 5599 February 3rd, 1959 was for many, “the day the music died”, when Buddy Holly, Ritchie Valens and The Big Bopper were all killed. Their plane took off a little after 1 AM from Clear Lake, Iowa, when a cold Northeast wind gave way to a blinding snow storm which drastically reduced visibility. Encased in a sea of snow with only white below, pilot Roger Peterson seemed to become disoriented and flew the plane into the ground. One wing hit the frozen earth and the small plane tumbled over and over, killing the three musicians and the plane’s young pilot.
The Beatles made their first appearance on The Ed Sullivan Show, which was watched by over 73 million people (60% of the viewing audience). The Fab Four performed “All My Loving”, “Till There Was You”, “She Loves You”, “I Saw Her Standing There” and “I Want to Hold Your Hand”. Before their performance, Beatles’ manager Brian Epstein told Sullivan, “I would like to know the exact wording of your introduction.” Sullivan replied, “I would like you to get lost.” Also performing on the show was a future member of The Monkees, Davy Jones, who appeared as part of the cast of Oliver.
1199 5555 At the recommendation of R&B artist Lloyd Price, Richard Penniman, who is currently leading an ensemble called Little Richard And The Upsetters, sends a demo tape to Specialty Records founder Art Rupe. After some initial reluctance, Rupe will sign Penniman to a contract that will pay the singer a half-cent for every record sold.
1199 6633 11 9966 55 The Four Tops are inked to Berry After smoking three packs of cigaGordy’s Motown label and receive rettes a day for many years, Nat a $400 signing bonus. King Cole died of lung cancer at the age of 47. His daughter Natalie had The Rolling Stones take over as the just turned 15 the previous week. Sunday house band at the Station Nat originally played piano in Jazz Hotel near London. They are paid bands, but stepped to the front of 24 Pounds ($67) to entertain a the stage for good when “Mona crowd of 66 people. Lisa” became a number one hit in ENIGMA
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charts in 1956 when he was just 13 with “Why Do Fools Fall in Love”. 11 9966 99 A hairdresser named Vickie Jones was arrested in Fort Myers, Florida for trying to pass herself off as Aretha Franklin. Jones’ concert performance was so realistic that no one asked for a refund. 1199 7700 Jefferson Airplane is fined $1,000 for onstage profanity in Oklahoma City. After the family of the late Ferdinand von Zeppelin threatens a lawsuit, Led Zeppelin performs in Copenhagen, Denmark as The Nobs. “Bridge Over Troubled Water” becomes Simon And Garfunkel’s third US number one hit. The song would go on to win five awards at the 13th Annual Grammy Awards in 1971, including Record Of The Year and Song Of The Year. The piano player on the track is Larry Knechtel, who also played for the soft-rock group, Bread. The drummer was legendary session man Hal Blaine. 11 9977 22 Paul Simon releases his first new song without Art Garfunkel, “Mother and Child Reunion”, which will peak at number four in the US.
Simon got the idea for the song’s years before. The song became a #7 title from a chicken-and-egg dish hit in the UK. called Mother and Child Reunion that he saw on a Chinese restau1199 8866 George Michael announced that rant’s menu. Wham! would officially split during Led Zeppelin is forced to cancel a the summer. concert in Singapore when officials 1199 8888 won’t let them off the plane After allegedly referring to El Paso, because of their long hair. Texas as “the place with all those 1199 7766 greasy Mexicans”, Joe Elliot and the The theme from the ABC-TV pro- rest of Def Leppard are forced to gram S.W.A.T. became the first tel- cancel a show in that city due to evision theme song to top the various threats. Billboard Hot 100. Before that, the 1199 8899 theme from the original Hawaii 5-0 had made it to number 4. A category for Heavy Metal is included at the Grammys Awards 11 9977 77 for the first time. Metallica perOne of the best selling albums of forms on stage, but the award went all time, Fleetwood Mac’s, to Jethro Tull. Many audience “Rumors” was released. The LP members booed. Meanwhile, spent 31 weeks at the top of the US Bobby McFerrin won Record Of The album chart on the strength of the Year and Song Of The Year for singles, “Go Your Own Way”, “Don’t Worry, Be Happy”, Tracy “Dreams”, “Don’t Stop” and “You Chapman is named Best New Artist Make Loving Fun”, all of which hit and Tina Turner won Best Female the US Top 10. The album eventual- Rock Vocal Performance for “Tina ly sold over 18 million copies. Live in Europe”. 1199 7799 While celebrating his freedom after serving seven weeks in jail for assault, Sid Vicious (born Simon Ritchie) died of a drug overdose after injecting heroin that his mother had bought for him. The 21 year old had been the bass player for one of Britain’s most influential Punk-Rock bands, The Sex Pistols, which had broken up a year earlier.
Felder until early 2008 to finally issue his autobiography, Heaven and Hell: My Life in the Eagles (1974-2001).
South Hospital in Stuart, Florida, where he was pronounced dead of a severe heart attack due to coronary artery disease. His former band mate Micky Dolenz would 22000033 later say, “He was the brother I 100 people died after pyrotechnics never had and this leaves a giganignited a club during a gig by Great tic hole in my heart.” White in West Warwick, Rhode 22001133 Island. Great White singer Ty Longley was also killed in the acci- Chubby Checker launched a halfdent, while 230 people were billion dollar lawsuit against injured and another 132 escaped Hewlett-Packard for including an unharmed. app on its phones and tablets that used the same name as the 71-year220011 00 old musician to measure a man’s Doug Fieger, the lead singer for penis length based on his shoe size. The Knack on their 1979 hit “My The app had already been removed Sharona”, died after a six-year bat- in 2012 after it was downloaded tle with cancer. He was 57. just 84 times at a cost of 99 cents. In July, 2014, the suit would be set22001122 tled out of court for undisclosed Whitney Houston, whose majestic terms. voice helped her place 32 songs on 220011 99 the Billboard Pop chart between 1985 and 2001, passed away at the Monkees’ bassist Peter Tork passed age of 48. away at the age of 77. He had been diagnosed with a rare form of can64-year-old Davy Jones, of the cer that affected his tongue ten made-for-TV group The Monkees, years earlier, but a regular checksuffered chest pains while riding up declared him cancer free in 1199 9900 one of his fourteen horses at a 2012. Milli Vanilli are awarded the Best farm near Indiantown, Florida. He New Artist Grammy. It would take was rushed to Martin Memorial until the following November for producer Frank Farian to confess that the duo of Fab Morvan and Rob Pilatus never actually sang a single note on their recordings, causing the award to be withdrawn.
11 9999 33 Toy Caldwell, lead singer for The 1199 88 00 Marshall Tucker band on their 1977 Bill Wyman announces that he will million seller, “Heard It In A Love quit the Rolling Stones in 1983. He Song”, died in his sleep at the age is persuaded not to and stays nine of 45. more years, eventually leaving in 22000011 1992. Eagles’ guitarist Don Felder Bon Scott, vocalist for AC/DC, died receives a phone call from managof alcohol poisoning at the age of er Irving Azoff who tells him that 33. the rest of the band has “decided to go on without you.” A shocked 1199 8833 Felder will spend the next few days Michael Jackson’s album “Thriller” pleading for another chance, but rose to #1 on the US album chart will be rebuffed and soon after he where it would stay for 37 weeks. It will receive his official termination went on to become the most suc- notice. Felder would launch a $50 cessful album of all time, with sales million law suit against guitarist estimated by various sources as Glen Frey and drummer Don being between 65 and 110 million Henley, alleging wrongful terminacopies worldwide. tion and breach of implied-in-fact contract. Henley and Frey then 11 9988 44 countersued Felder for breach of Van Halen enjoyed a US number contract, alleging that Felder had one smash with “Jump”, after David written and attempted to sell the Lee Roth added lyrics to music that rights to a “tell-all” book. Both parEddie Van Halen had written two ties settled out-of-court, but it took ENIGMA
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