Issue # 1 2008 - 2009
Cover Art by Albert Anciso
This issue contains writing and art from Mercedes High School students & faculty Spring 2009.
SPEECHLESS INTRODUCTION
Speechless The Sins Issue Issue # 1 Spring 2009 Speechless members at large: Arechar, Priscilla Banales, Jose V. Barrientes, Jennifer Gutierrez, Diana
Speechless is MHS‟s new literary arts magazine but not the first of its kind on campus. The last time MHS had a literary magazine was in 1989. It was called Creative Bits. Back issues are available at MHS Library. This is an opportunity for MHS to showcase its artists. Art is subjective and means something different to every single person. It is in a constant state of change, so you can never really pin down what it is. Speechless would like to send a special thanks to Ms. Gutierrez and Mr. De Anda for letting us express ourselves through this magazine, along with Mr. Root, the entire English and Art Departments for introducing Mercedes artists to our community. Thanks again to all our writers, artists, and the Speechless crew for checking “yes or no”.
Noyola, Esmeralda Robledo, Celina Root, Robert
Speechless NOTE: Speechless will be coming out every semester and will hopefully become an after school program for creative writing at Mercedes High School next year. No work or any part of this issue may be reproduced (quoted, copied, photographed, videotaped, or broadcast) without the written consent of the artist or writer.
Drawing by Anonymous
All letters to the editor are welcome; however, please limit the length of each letter to one doublespaced page of which some may be published in our next issue with your consent. Include your name and e-mail address.
For more information on Speechless contact E. Noyola, B 4 or e-mail. SPEECHLESS
The views reflected within this issue do not represent the views of Mercedes High School; in fact, the views expressed by any speaker or character in any statement, poem, drawing, photo, painting, or short story do not necessarily reflect the views of anyone at MHS. This is art. Page 1
TABLE OF CONTENTS Cover Art by Albert Anciso ~~~~~~~
Cover
Wet by Anonymous ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Page 1 Child Fist Photo by Anonymous~~~~~~~ Page 2 Sleep by Kiara Morales~ ~~~~~~~~~~~
Page 3
Oppressed by Jose V. Banales ~~~~~~~~
Page 3
Ourselves that Scream by Alex Hernandez ~~~~~~~~~
Page 3
Have you ever, have you by Narcedalia Ramirez ~~~~~~
Page 4
...Sin by Sevi. Roque ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Page 5
...Sin Art by Sevi. Roque ~~~~~~~~~~~
Page 5
Lit by Krystal Rincon ~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Page 6
The Sins of a School Hall by Coach Pete Martinez, Jr.~~~
Page 6
Cartoon by Albert Anciso ~~~~~~~~ Yes by Anonymous ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Random by LeoVela ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Friday Night by Jose V. Banales ~~~~ The Search for a Great Love by Jade ~ Art by Monica Ybarra ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Alright by Jose V. Banales ~~~~~~~~ Sin = Pride by Baldemar Garcia ~~~~ Art by Albert Anciso ~~~~~~~~~~~
Page 9 Page 9 Page 10 Page 10 Page 10 Page 10 Page 11 Page 11 Page 11
Romeo by Jose V. Banales ~~~~~~~~ The Man I Never Knew by J. Barrientes ~~~~~~~
Page 12
Cyclopes by Julie A. Rodriguez ~~~~
Page 12 Page 13 Page 13
More Like You by Jade ~~~~~~~~~ ~~ Loves to Eat By Isaac Grimaldo ~~~~~~
Page 7 Page 7
Cartoon by Albert Anciso ~~~~~~~~~~
Page 7
The Tragedy of Barbie by D. Gutierrez ~~~~~~
Aguitado by Jose V. Banales~~~~~~~~~
Page 8
Envy by Anonymous ~~~~~~~~~~~~
Page 12
Shout of Sin by Alex Hernandez~~~~~~~ Page 8 Deep by Baldemar Garcia ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Page 8 Cartoon by Albert Anciso ~~~~~~~~~~~
Page 8
Love Into Hate by Maria Zuniga ~~~~~~
Page 9
Remember That by Jose V. Banales ~~~~ Page 9
Photo by Anonymous
SPEECHLESS
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Ourselves that scream Hiddenwithin the open air, the atmosphere Lurkingamongst the gracious beauty of the world, of life Creepinginto our lives, our gentle mindsat awful times beckoninga murky shadow to cloak ourselves.
Drawing by Kiara Morales
Oppressed Everyday I must face being oppressed. If it ain‟t the color of my skin, it‟s the way I‟m dressed. It‟s an everyday thing. Walking in da parkin‟ lot, white woman locking her doors, store clerks followin‟ me around the store. Didn‟t Cesar Chavez end dis crap or is it kuz I‟m young? People pass judgment quickly everyday. Sure the country I live in I love, but lovin‟ it makes u grow up fast enough. Still, no one‟s getting treated fairly unless u gots money or a white name like Michelle or Steven. Listen, I gotz sum things I gotta get off ma chest. Y R we fighting a war over in Afghanistan when Mexicans, blacks, and whites R killing each other? Did we 4get bout the war in dis country? What good is freedom if the rich just keep gettin‟ more freeah? Mi raza and my gente runnin‟ around with no place or tierra. White rich old women strikin‟ the lotto again is on the news everyday. Why don‟t they do a human relations piece in the barrio? No, they take their time interviewing more rich people. By Jose. V. Banales 956 Pelon
Unsuspectedinside our emotions, that determine our day Lurkingaround in the humanity of our hearts Slitheringinto our spoken words Beckoninga murky shadow to cloak ourselves. Shadowsseeming simple yet, reality shows the opposite Strugglingto lift also, difficult to mangle the murky shadows that scream: Demanding and CrucialTo lightenour souls, to feel our heart-pound with every beat-filled with selfless grace to lightenthe path to heaven. By Alex Hernandez
SPEECHLESS
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Have you ever, have you Have you ever met An
Have you
Anorexic
Would you notice
Have you
All the presents
Would you notice
Would you believe
The skeletal frame
The fake promises
Loves to Eat I love to eat I love to eat I love to eat I eat everyday Every second Every minute
Would you hear Its crying stomach
Have you ever met
Or
HER
Its whisper “shut up. You don‟t need more.” Have you Have you ever met
HER that comes as the form of a reaper in the form of one of these shadowing
A
HER every move
Bulimic
ANOREXIA
Have you
BULIMIA
Would you notice
SELF-MUTALATION
The yellow teeth would you hear
SUICIDE
The toilet flushes Could you smell
Waiting
The decaying breath
For that final moment So doom can be HER demise If you have met HER
Cutter
Would you ever
Have you
Try to understand
Would you notice
And if you would
I eat when I‟m asleep I eat when I‟m awake I eat in my dreams I eat in my nightmares I love to eat
The wristbands Would you strain your ear to hear
Could you
Its cry Not of the physical pain, but of the emotional Have you ever met
I love to eat I love to eat I eat when I‟m hungry I eat when I‟m full I eat when I‟m bored I eat when I‟m excited I love to eat I love to eat I love to eat
Have you ever met A
Every hour 24 hours a day 365 days a year I love to eat
By Narcedalia Ramirez
I love to eat I love to eat I eat when I‟m inside I eat when I‟m outside
A suicidal
"My hope in my life is to strive for beauty without vanity, strength without insolence, courage without ferocity, and kindness without pretense." -Dante's The Divine Comedy
I eat when I‟m nowhere I eat when I‟m somewhere I love to eat I love to eat I love to eat By Isaac Grimaldo
SPEECHLESS
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…SIN
Lit
..There are seven And each one is just as bad as the last
Brother,
Hermano!
Unified, yet each one stands alone
porque me mataste?
Watching…waiting Singing their sinister songs like harpies
never
Trying to crush our souls onto The burning rocks
think alcohol
Seven ingredients that Form our downfall…
body
Envy who we ourselves grow and harbor…
light me up
He who drives us to horrible actions
Mad
Which we’ll come to regret.
haunt
Greed who comes in forms of bad motivation He causes us to squeeze our loved ones to the core for more.
CRAZY!
…He’s always competing with Envy…
With hate, Sister
Lust, which convinces us that she loves us…
By Krystal Rincon
…but she’s a terrible liar… Wrath…who invokes himself Even when we don’t deserve it. Pride, she holds envy’s hand Forever unified… Complementing the attributes That drag us down ever so slowly. Sloth…oh she’s a clever one. The way she wears her mask To lure us into a rhythmic numbness. Oh how nostalgic… But the most universal of the seven… Could very well be the worst. Glutton. Who agitates us more. So similar to Greed yet profoundly different. He lives like a parasite… So as by their strength Of their illusion Will draw us into confusion. And so we shall know security….
Drawing by Sevi. Roque …Our morals’ closest enemies…
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by
Sevi. Roque
The SINS of a School Hall As I walk the halls the sights and sounds are Sins that frighten even an old school teacher. A student walking the halls or sitting in the cafeteria and going no place, that is a sin. The teacher that sits by the computer instead of standing by the doorway to greet the students and wonders why the halls are so congested, that is a Sin. The boyfriend that makes his girlfriend cry and forgets the pain his mother may feel because the tears are seen at home, that is a sin. The teacher who doesn’t reach out to a student instead belittles the child into thinking they will never succeed, that is a sin. The student who complains about the food and leaves it on the table knowing that in another part of the world a mother cries because her own body cannot create the nourishment for her hungry child, that is a sin. The teacher who gets to school late or even to the classroom yet writes up the student for being tardy, that is a sin. The student who is afraid to speak English because others giggle at their pronunciation and yet their own Spanish sounds like a high school text, that is a sin. The teacher that hates to change their teaching ways hoping that the new curriculum will disappear, that is a sin. The students who think the easy way can be found in drugs, alcohol and easy money, that is a sin. The teacher who smiles only at the end of the day, that is a sin. The student who sits alone and has no friends while others walk by without even a glance, that is a sin. To have “No Pride” in your school, that is a sin. The greatest Sin is the student that wastes his God-given talents and never gives his mind a chance to create and share with others. The unforgivable Sin is the teacher that does not give their “Heart and Soul” to his or her profession.
By Coach Pete Martinez SPEECHLESS
Page 6
You may find these words simple and meaningless, but I feel a need to share them with you. Let me tell you of the joys you bring to my life because I know that in you, I will always find someone I can turn to for acceptance and understanding You are simple and humble and your beauty lies deep within You criticize yourself for not being formally educated, but your experiences make you wiser than anyone I know It lightens my load knowing that you are just a phone call away You have helped me through some of life‟s little tragedies more times than I could ever repay We have shared so many wonderful moments And some I would like to forget There have also been some secrets and jokes I simply can not forget You have a gift for healing and mending broken hearts with words that lift my spirit when I felt I could no longer go on The way you share yourself is something I wish I could you are so enduring of my pains and good times too Your words are reassuring and bring back a smile to my face Because of you, I know that life‟s simple pleasures should never be taken for granted I have a mother of my own, but somehow I wish she could be more like you. If you ever fell like you aren‟t appreciated, or I have forgotten to thank you, please always remember my simple words; this gift I give to you These words mean so much to me, hope they mean as much to you By Jade
Cartoon by Albert Anciso
SPEECHLESS
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Aguitado
Deep
Me encuentro aguitado como un perro abandonado Como quisiera borrar todo el mal pasado
What should you do when your heart feels broken?
Nomas quedan recuerdos de lindos pensamientos
There are so many words that have been unspoken.
Como quisiera explicarte todo lo que siento It‟s sad to see you leave.
I don‟t get it, why can‟t I just be happy?
I just can‟t believe I wasn‟t there for you
I‟m always down, always feeling crappy.
like you were for me I know I did you wrong Wish I could take it back
I guess I can‟t handle change so well.
If I could, then I would
I‟m acting out, can‟t you tell?
Never knew what I had „til I lost it all Still got you in my heart
It‟s moving so fast, leaving me behind. by Jose V. Banales 956 Pelon Shout of Sin
Why can‟t time just freaking rewind? I try pretending like nothing is wrong. Relying on my happiness with a catchy song.
I shout a secret in a whisper of words to your ear “have you ever sinned like maybe said cheers?”
Hoping I won‟t cry or frown, yet I cry when no one‟s around.
A sin is a sin we all have our share even when forgiven we tend not to care
I try my best not to show how I feel. Emotions I do conceal.
We continue our misbehavior but stop it must we should not hold pride, greed nor lust
I‟m hard to understand, but it‟s just how I planned. Someday I‟ll be filled with bliss.
So pour out all the wrong you think or do to allow you through to heaven a judging will be of you.
Not completely happy, but it‟s better than this. This feeling has me so tired; I believe someday my heart will get what is most desired.
By Alex Hernandez
By Baldemar Garcia Cartoon by Albert Anciso SPEECHLESS
Page 8
Take It Easy
There will come a day when you must fill your pockets with cash.
Slow down, you‟re growing up too fast.
This is not the time to look at the date.
Stop before it‟s too late.
Slow down, you‟re growing up too fast.
For these fun times just won‟t last. I‟ve heard it said there are only three things that last; Take it easy, have a blast.
Hope, love, and Faith.
Don‟t rush past the opened gate.
Slow down, you‟re growing up too fast.
Slow down, you‟re growing up too fast. Laugh, dance, and play without haste.
Walk barefoot on the sand or play on the grass.
Hang with your friends. Find a good mate.
Learn to love life; don‟t learn how to hate.
Slow down, you‟re growing up too fast.
For these fun times just won‟t last.
For these fun times just won‟t last
Yes
By Jennifer Barrientes
Remember That?
I should’ve not broken up with him. I can‟t believe you called it off the day before his birthday. That‟s cold. He wanted to get married. I’m 16. What does he think? No estamos en un rancho. I‟m surprised anyone wanted to marry you at all. Yeah. It’ll be hard finding someone else que me aguante. What didn‟t you like about him? Nothing I can remember. That’s stupid. Maybe I was just scared. Scared of what? He was too nice. Is that even possible? Yes. How can someone be so understanding? I don’t think he really liked me if he didn’t mind that I would go out with my friends and other boys were there. He never seemed jealous. Do boys have to be jealous in order to prove that they care about you? No, but it helps. What if he was, but didn‟t show it? Don’t say that! That would be terrible. Because it means you are an idiot? Yes.
I‟ve been doing a lot of thinking lately. Listen, this all started when I was at the park the other day. Remember that? I saw this guy get on one knee and heard him say to his girl, “Casate con migo.” My Heart stopped right there when I saw the look on her face. Baby, I swear she didn‟t even know what to say. She couldn‟t even breathe, but her tears of happiness gave the cover away. I witnessed the beginning of something so true. I wanna make you feel the same way too. It‟s been so long that we‟ve been together and I want to take the next step. Make it last forever. I want you to close your eyes. I got a surprise for you. I think it‟s time. I feel that it‟s that time for you and me to shine. Girl, will you be mine? Can you feel my heart skip a beat? Just thinking about you makes me weak. It‟s been a while. „Til this very day. It took me this much to figure out what to say. For some reason it never crossed my mind. I‟d figured we always be together „til the end of time.
By Anonymous By Jose V. Banales 956 Pelon
Cartoon by Albert Anciso SPEECHLESS
Page 9
Random Love is everything you could possibly imagine. It‟s pleasant, devastating, and absolutely deadly. And because of what love is people may actually be willing to change their everyday lifestyle in order to gain this treasure. Truly, love is mind control. The beautiful girl in high school can easily use her charms to control any male with a weak mind. Once a male is in grasp, the female can tell the male to do anything and when they part the male, depending on how strong the bond is, will feel like a thousand rusty knives just penetrated his heart. While the enjoyment was delightful, the pain was multiple times worse. Several people wonder if it‟s worth it. Love is a gamble. While everyone has almost an equal chance in the world to love, the outcome of a relationship is random. Some people may do anything for love, making them do some of the most mediocre things. Love may as well be considered blind. The only thing they see is the person they want to be with and are distracted from reality. One misconception made by many people is that only opposites attract. Anyone can love anyone or anything. Love for sure has no limits to where it can reach and can be found even in the foulest places. You can‟t hide from it. You can see, love controls, dominates, and is inescapable. What is love? It‟s everything but visible. By Leo Vela The Search for Great Love
Friday Night
Have you ever had a great love? Love that fills your heart with joy and
What is love?
sorrow
Is it the feeling I get when your lips touch mine?
Feeling that can lift you and hold you above Tingle and flutter you pray will be there tomorrow The kind of love that can make you smile and laugh
Holdin‟ back …I held back on the things I knew that god meant to be true …I never saw through the fog
Hurt and pain that smoothes over with just a touch
…I thought to myself about those things.
Emotions that grow and begin to pile
I knew I loved you and god, was it true?
Bursting with fire that burns, oh too much
I keep falling in love with you.
Words fill your head, words you‟re too afraid to utter It makes you breathe so hard, you heart skips a beat
I hated not knowing if you loved me too …awaking one day knowing what I wanted was you. How could I tell you? Help me explain.
Bewildering thoughts that make you stutter
My heart feels like I have been detained.
Your temperature rises like summer‟s
One thing I held back that was true
heat
That I knew I needed to get through to you
Waiting, wishing, silently hoping,
…I‟m in love with you.
Someday it will come, there‟ll be no more moping.
By Jose V. Banales 956 Pelon
By Jade SPEECHLESS
Art by Monica Ybarra
Page 10
Alright You came to me one day, I felt that everything was alright until it hit one night It felt dark as if there was no light Something just didn‟t feel right My body felt tight I thought I was going to lose my sight Someone called and said you were in a fight When I arrived, I saw you were alright Then, out of sight a car pulled up and nothing seemed right I heard two things and saw blasts of light I yelled hoping you were alright I laid by your side And cried as you died. By Jose V. Banales 956 Pelon Sin = Pride So much pride, in your cocky little mind. So much pride that you overflow deep inside. Too much pride is one of the capital seven sins. Too much pride, in a battle you will never win. Pride is the deadliest sin of them all. If you don‟t care, just listen to me because soon you will fall. You walk with your chest puffed up and self-obsessed. Telling yourself and everyone else that you‟re the best. You think you‟re so good because you‟re cocky at everything You have no self-control because the sin is now controlling.
Art by Albert Anciso
It‟s pretty sad to know too much pride has gotten your sanity. In reality you‟re just a puppet full of vanity. You love to show a cocky attitude to others. Especially to your own damn brothers. You think you are superior, but you are just inferior Look at yourself, homie, look into a mirror. So much pride, in your soul deep inside. Too much pride, overloading is your mind.
By Baldemar Garcia SPEECHLESS
Page 11
Drawing by Julie A. Rodriguez
Romeo, Stop looking for your Juliet. She will come to you. Sometimes life may make it seem as if this isn‟t true, but believe me, you‟ll pull through She‟ll come to you Just hope you let her come close to you. by Jose V. Banales 956 Pelon
The Man I Never Knew There you stood, tall and lean Just like I‟ve always been told. I don‟t remember you, I hardly even knew you. You were there when I arrived, I was there when you departed. I‟m not sure you really knew me either. You are the man I call father, the man I wish I could have called “Daddy”. Time was so cruel to us. Your life was short, but your gift lingers in me. Your friends tell their stories And Mom holds her memories and shares them with me But, that is not enough. I dreamt about you and in my dream You held your arms open. I don‟t know what to make of it I just wish it was real. I know someday we‟ll meet again. I don‟t wish it soon, for I too Have those who need me here, And they call me “Mommy”. By Jennifer Barrientes
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SPEECHLESS THE TRAGEDY OF BARBIE (With apologies to William Shakespeare)
Envy All other capital, seven, or deadly sins pale in comparison to that of envy. While you‟re more than likely nodding your head, wondering why wrath would pale in comparison to one such as envy, the simple fact you must understand is that envy is the root cause of the mortal sins. In Silence of The Lambs, Hannibal Lector questions FBI agent Clarice Starling on the possible motives of a mass murderer; during this discussion Lector reveals why the wrath of this killer was invoked. “He covets.”
Lector continues to articulate,
“We begin by coveting what we see everyday”. In this he unveiled a truth in all of us. How is lust invoked? We covet. Wrath? We covet. Envy of what we see everyday forces us to covet things until the inevitable unleashing of Envy‟s relative sins.
"Envy and Arrogance and Avarice are the three sparks that have all hearts enkindled." -Dante's The Divine Comedy: The Inferno
Friends, women, consumers, lend me your ears; I come to bury Barbie, not to praise her. The sexist exploitation that men create lives after them, The true nature and value of the fair sex is often interred with their bones; So let it be with Barbie. The noble toy company hath told you Barbie is a role model. If it is so, it is a grievous fault, And grievously have women answered for it. Here under the leave of the First Amendment and on behalf of all women Come I to expose Barbie. She is my nemesis, a goal unattainable; But the toy company says she is the ideal, and the toy company has its finger on the pulse of humanity (able to distort the natural progression of the role of women). Barbie hath brought many captives home to Mattel, With whose hard earned dollars did the toy company’s coffers fill; Does this in Barbie seem honorable? When the poor preteens have cried for ownership, parents have cried foul; Yet the toy company says she is the ideal, and the toy company has its finger on the pulse of humanity (able to distort the natural progression of the role of women). You all have seen her on the shelves: statuesque, blond, blue-eyed, richly dressed and accessorized with jewelry, shoes and purses to match, swimwear, casual wear, sportswear, evening gowns, holiday garb; Townhouse, beach house, travel van, sports car, hair salon, great friends and steady beau all within reach; An empty-headed beauty with no visible means of support or skills who plays dress-up mocking professional women spouting such empty platitudes as “Math is tough!”— An ornament, a plaything. Yet the toy company says she is the ideal, And sure they have their finger on the pulse of humanity (able to distort the natural progression of the role of women). I speak not to disprove what the toy company seeks to accomplish, but here I am to speak what I do know. Women often suffer unrest, jealousy and resentment; Perhaps it stems from the fact that we have failed to attain the ideal that is “Barbie.” For we all did love her once, not without cause; What cause withholds you then to say “NO” to the manufactured ideal? O judgment, thou art fled to blatant exploitation Preying upon the hopes and dreams of young women everywhere. And men have usurped their power. Bear with me; My heart is in the coffin with Barbie. And I must pause or lose the identity of my soul. By D. Gutierrez
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